2014-2015
OUR
MARRIAGES
7 Atlanta couples share their wedding stories YES!
5 local spots to pop the big Q
LEGAL WISDOM
Should you get a prenup? Attorney Kathleen Womack weighs in
WEDDING WALLET
Budget-trimming tips you’ll love
From the publishers of
GA VOICE and EQUALLY WED MAGAZINE
WEDDINGS 2014-2015
Editorial EDITOR IN CHIEF Kirsten Ott Palladino EDITOR Dyana Bagby CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Tori Allen Liza Dunning
Design ART DIRECTOR Rob Boeger
Advertising PUBLISHER Tim Boyd ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Marshall Graham Anne Clarke
Online DESIGN/DEVELOPMENT Maria Palladino
About the cover Photo by Sarah Williams, Val and Sarah Atlanta Gay Weddings is published annually by Equally Wed Magazine and GA Voice. atlantagayweddings.com info@atlantagayweddings.com Phone: 404-815-6941 Fax: 404-693-6365
4
Letters from the Editors
The power of love
H
alf a decade ago, I married my wife, Maria, and although I had been covering weddings throughout my 13-plus writing and editing career, I had not yet seen a lesbian, gay or transgender wedding in a magazine. That realization hit me like a brick thrown at my heart when Maria and I began to plan our own Atlanta wedding. We live in a state that (as of press time) does not legally recognize our relationship (yet now our country as a whole does—wow). It’s because of this legal discrimination that our community has to fight harder than ever for our relationships to be seen as valid. And one of the ways that we do this is to offer visual affirmation of the beauty and power of love. That’s the impetus behind Atlanta Gay Weddings, a publication brought to you by EquallyWed.com and the GA Voice. We believe in your commitment wholeheartedly, and we’re here to offer you guidance and support along the way, whether it’s deciding where to pop the question or choosing the best libations for your reception (craft beer! Champagne! cocktails!). We offer an array of inspiration and information on the following pages, including highlights from seven local couples who gracefully allowed us to share portraits from an important moment in their lives. Entwined Studio
ATLANTA GAY
Kirsten Ott Palladino, Editor in Chief editor@atlantagayweddings.com | @kirstenop
Visible change
M
any people I speak to these days fully expect marriage equality to happen in our country in the next two to three years. It’s a good bet to make thanks to the string of more than 20 federal court decisions striking down samesex marriage bans as unconstitutional. Just a decade ago, Georgia voters turned out in high numbers to ban same-sex marriage. This year, though, a national poll shows more than half of Georgia residents are fine with at least giving gay couples legal recognition of their relationships. We are moving forward. The couples like the ones featured in Atlanta Gay Weddings are an important part of our equality movement. They are unafraid to show their love to the world and by doing so are changing the hearts and minds of their co-workers, their neighbors, their family, their church, their elected officials. Picking out stationery, selecting a caterer, agreeing to a venue — all of these seem like part of the normal to-do list when planning a wedding. But these tasks, and the resulting ceremony, are also part of a bigger picture of creating change. You don’t always have to march in a rally to show you are an activist. Sometimes you just have to get married. Dyana Bagby, Editor
6
Letters from the editors 4 4
6 Five unique proposal spots 6 Seasonal cocktail recipes 8 8 Get married without 10 going broke 10
8
24
30
42
Real weddings: Jesse & William
12 12
Real weddings: Aisha & Nina
16 16
Real weddings: Eve & Cassandra
18 18
Real weddings: Annabeth & Elaine
22 22
Real weddings: Michael & Robert
24 24
Real weddings: Tiffany & Angela
30 30
Real weddings: Jelena & Dee
34 34
Handling homophobia in the family
36 36
Georgia’s march to marriage equality
38 38
Prenups for 40 LGBTQ Georgians 40 Sweet succulents 42 42 Add craft beer 44 to your wedding 44
*
44
Vendor directory
46
Special advertising
47
Visit us online @ www.atlantagayweddings.com 5
Love locales
Atlanta Botanical Garden
YES! By Tori Allen
O
utside of your actual wedding day, the day of your proposal is one of the most memorable and special days of your life. You will carefully plan down to every last detail to ensure the perfect way to pop the question and prepare for the rest of your lives together. But one of the most intimidating aspects to planning the proposal includes the place, and you know it’s all about location, location, location. Looking to keep it local? Want to propose outside, or maybe in a private setting? Check out these five incredibly romantic and special spots in Atlanta to make your proposal as special as it can possibly be. SkyLounge – Glenn Hotel’s Rooftop Bar SkyLounge offers an unparalleled, unhindered view of the entire city from its swanky Downtown location, with 360 degree views to see our beautiful city in all its glory. Add 6
Five unique spots to pop the big question on its selection of cocktails and beverages, unbeatable service and more, and SkyLounge becomes one of the most memorable spots to propose. glennsskylounge.com SkyView Atlanta Atlanta’s only Ferris wheel attraction opened in 2013 and has already become a welcome addition to our sky line. Those who are seeking a non-traditional way to surprise their special someone should consider SkyView as a top place for your proposal. SkyView offers climate-controlled gondolas, and also offers the posh VIP gondola with Ferrari leather seats and a glass floor. Champagne not included. skyviewatlanta.com Piedmont Park For those looking to create a big scene for their proposal, by setting up a flash mob or getting a large group together, Piedmont Park proves to be the best with its Midtown
s a c v a i p
A
i c a a
SkyView Atlanta
Aria’s Private Wine Cellar
skyline view, romantic settings, pet-friendly atmosphere and more. Additionally, couples can propose in Piedmont Park, and then visit a number of nearby bars, restaurants and more for a family celebration, including Park Tavern and its private event spaces. piedmontpark.org Atlanta Botanical Garden Between its winter Christmas décor and its summertime plumage, the Atlanta Botanical Garden serves as a beautiful location for a proposal. Guests can enjoy romantic walks and private areas to propose, including the
SkyLounge – Glenn Hotel’s Rooftop Bar
Robinson gazebo, the Levy parterre and the fragrance garden. atlantabotanicalgarden.org Aria’s Private Wine Cellar Aria is known for its delicious cuisine and wine lists, but did you also know it offers one of the most romantic tables in the city in its private dining wine cellar? The charming space includes an intimate private dining table, surrounded by countless bottles of Aria’s fine wine selection. By night, candles light the space. Swoon! aria-atl.com Images courtesy of the venues 7
Cheers
FALL
Old Fashioned
Recipe courtesy of Four Roses Ingredients: n 1.5 ounces Four Roses Small Batch Bourbon n 1 cube of sugar (or a splash of simple syrup) n 2 dashes bitters n 2-3 ice cubes n Twist of lemon Method: In an old fashioned glass, place a sugar cube or use simple syrup as a substitute. Add bitters and just enough water to help dissolve the sugar. Crush or muddle the sugar in the glass and coat the bottom of the glass. Add 2-3 ice cubes and Four Roses Small Batch Bourbon. Garnish with a twist or a slice of orange and a cherry.
Raise your Glass
Pair your signature cocktail with your wedding’s season By Kirsten Ott Palladino
WINTER French American 75
Recipe courtesy of Bluecoat American Gin Ingredients: n 1 ounce Bluecoat American Gin n.5 ounce lemon juice n.5 ounce lavender simple syrup n Brut Champagne Method: Add all the ingredients except the Champagne to a shaker and fill with ice. Shake well and strain into a Champagne flute. Top with the Champagne, and garnish with a lemon twist.
8
SPRING Peach Lambic and Raspberry Liqueur Cocktail Recipe courtesy of The Ice Cream Bar
Ingredients: n 1-ounce scoop Peach Lambic Craft Beer Ice Cream by Frozen Pints n .5 ounce raspberry liqueur n 4 ounces Champagne (dry) Method: Pour raspberry liqueur into bottom of chilled flute glass. Pour Champagne in halfway, letting bubbles settle. Drop in 1 scoop of Peach Lambic. Serve immediately.
SUMMER Berry Mojito Float Recipe courtesy of The Ice Cream Bar
Ingredients: n 1-ounce scoop Mojito Sorbet by The Ice Cream Bar n 4-6 ounces lime soda n A handful of frozen berries Method: Drop berries into bottom of chilled Champagne flute. Pour in lime soda halfway. Drop in 1 scoop Mojito Sorbet. Serve immediately. 9
Budget-trimming tips
Money matters
How to get married without going broke By Kirsten Ott Palladino
T
he modern-day wedding can cost a fortune but here’s a little secret the wedding industry doesn’t want you to know: It doesn’t have to be so expensive. You shouldn’t have to take out a second mortgage on your home or go into insane credit card debt. Here are some sensible guidelines for saving money— and your sanity—when tying the knot: PLAN A WEDDING THAT REFLECTS WHO YOU ARE Your wedding is a celebration of you and your beloved’s eternal commitment to one another, and yes, that calls for a party. But make it the type of party you’d normally throw, only a nicer version. But it doesn’t have to be opulent, over-the-top, full of frivolous details just because some expert on TLC said so. Do what makes you comfortable. CUT THE GUEST LIST If you really want the crème de la crème of everything for your dream wedding, opting for 14-karat-gold chargers and leaping ballet dancers performing at your reception, but the organic-focused locally sourcing caterer is charging you $100 per guest, then trim that list down to the bare minimum to your nearest and dearest and lop off extras like that excoworker you haven’t seen in five years or the childhood friend you’re only inviting because she invited you to her wedding a decade ago. FORGET HONORING TRADITIONS Here’s another secret: You might think those acts that seem so meaningful like carrying a bouquet or lighting a unity candle or having a wild bachelorette party are timehonored traditions. But truthfully, all of those 10
things are less than 100 years old in terms of weddings. You think your granny had an aisle runner at her wedding? Or passed out $300 worth of matchbooks imprinted with her and your grandpa’s names and wedding dates? No! These are all newer indulgent trends and while they’re fun if you can afford them and enjoy them, they’re not necessary. HAVE A VILLAGE MENTALITY In the olden days, weddings were planned and orchestrated by friends and family. If you really want to honor tradition, involve your loved ones in making things like flower arrangements, and food and cakes for the reception. Make your own lanterns and vintage banners with your names and wedding date. There are a gazillion paper patterns available on sites like marthastewartweddings.com that you can print out and go wild with creativity for very little money. DON’T SUCCUMB TO THE PRESSURE From the moment you get engaged to the day you say “I do,” there will be a hive of buzzing voices in your ear about what you absolutely must do to make your wedding a success. But it’s all BS. You don’t have to wear boutonnieres, you don’t absolutely have to have attendants in matching attire and genders, it’s quite all right if you don’t send save-the-date announcements and you certainly don’t have to feed your guests an entire sit-down fancy dinner. What you must do is this: be kind, gracious and loving to your guests for coming and for helping. That is all. For more practical tips and inspiration on planning your LGBTQ wedding, visit equallywed.com. Photo: Wiki Commons
Real weddings
B
Jesse & William June 8, 2014
Jesse and William Lirette-Treadwell first tied the knot in San Francisco in January, and then had a second wedding in Atlanta in June.
12
By KIRSTEN OTT PALLADINO OVERALL VIBE OF THE DAY: Fun, energy, love FAVORITE PART: Having everyone there and William giving me my ring he designed.—Jesse SPECIAL TOUCHES: Living statues and Cirque acts OF NOTE: Mariah Balenciaga, a contestant on RuPaul’s “Drag Race,” served as the flower girl
VENDORS VENUE: 200 Peachtree PHOTOS AND VIDEO: Cindy and Sharon | Same Sex Wedding Photographers PLANNERS: Anna Williams, Karyn Kolter and Drew Tull FLORIST: Flower by Sunflower DJ: DJ Mark Adams CATERER: Tep Catering
m
13
Real weddings
Aisha & Nina July 13, 2014
Norcross residents Aisha and Nina Jefferson-Smith married on July 13, 2014, in a daytime garden wedding at the Atrium in Norcross, Ga.
16
By KIRSTEN OTT PALLADINO OVERALL VIBE OF THE DAY: Butterflies and pure bliss FAVORITE PART: At the reception, where the guests were allowed to make special toasts was by far our favorite part. We were overjoyed with all the loving words and special blessings on our lives together as one. SPECIAL TOUCHES: We did a tree planting to symbolize the strength of our love, like the strong roots of a tree. MUSIC: We played a variety of music ranging from controversial and socially conscious to modern R&B medleys. The wedding party walked down to Macklemore’s “Same Love.” The brides walked down to John Legend’s “All of Me.” OF NOTE: We wanted our wedding to be an example for other same-sex couples, especially in the minority community. We had a lot of older family members attend who had adverse views about homosexuality until they realized our love was the same love that they would feel toward their significant other. In our opinion, we changed a few hearts that day.
VENDORS PHOTOGRAPHERS: Cindy and Sharon | Same Sex Wedding Photographers VIDEOGRAPHER: Randy Harris Genetix Recordings OFFICIANT: Rev. Dawn Smith-Camacho PLANNER: Carrie Lloyd FLORIST: Divine Events Design Studio ATTIRE: David’s Bridal MUSICIAN/BAND/DJ: Black Tie Events CATERER: The Atrium / Divine Event JEWELER: Zales STATIONERY: Red Skies Design LIGHTING: The Atrium (venue) HAIR: Kimberly Anthony MAKEUP: Princess Beale 17
Real weddings
B
P
g l w
o d p l d g m
Eve & Cassandra July 12, 2014
Atlantans Eve Wernicky and Cassandra Castillo eloped to Washington, D.C., to legally marry, surrounded by their closest friends and family members. They plan on having a larger wedding in their home state of Texas.
18
e t h h i m o
By KIRSTEN OTT PALLADINO OVERALL VIBE OF THE DAY: Perfect summer day FAVORITE PART: Arriving at the gardens and being greeted with our loved ones, teary eyed and filled with joy. SPECIAL TOUCHES: We wrote our own vows and personalized the wedding ceremony readings. My mother picked the flowers and Eve’s mom let Cassandra borrow her chai pendant. Cassandra also had a rosary my grandmother had given me pinned to my bouquet. OF NOTE: Cassandra was distracted by a bird and her babies during the ceremony. A bird flew above Eve’s head with a worm and began to feed her four babies right above Eve’s head in a nest. After the ceremony, family members took turns taking pictures of the baby birds in the nest.
VENDORS CEREMONY VENUE: The Bishop’s Garden at The National Cathedral, Washington, D.C. RECEPTION VENUE: Southern Hospitality restaurant PHOTOGRAPHER: Sarah Williams, Val and Sarah OFFICIANT: Travis Crytzer, Tie the Knot D.C. FLORIST: Palace Florist ATTIRE: Melissa Sweet, wedding dress; Calvin Klein suit JEWELER: Worthmore Jewelers MISC: Appy Couple for personalized wedding app and wedsite
19
Keeping Atlanta stoned since 1994.
Amsterdam Walk . 500 Amsterdam Ave . Atlanta . 404/892-8294 Decatur Square . 117 East Court Square . Decatur . 404/370-3979 www.worthmorejewelers.com
Real weddings
Annabeth & Elaine July 20, 2013
Annabeth Balance and Elaine T. DeCostanzo demonstrate lasting love; the Atlanta couple has been together for 25 years. The brides married on July 20, 2013, in an afternoon wedding at St. Luke’s Episcopal Church in Atlanta. It was especially meaningful as theirs was the first relationship to receive a same-sex blessing from their church.
22
By KIRSTEN OTT PALLADINO OVERALL VIBE OF THE DAY: Ecstatic on all parts. We were delighted that our beloved church had come to the place of developing a formal and official liturgy for gay couples, and to our surprise and delight, the entire congregation seemed to be deeply thrilled and proud to be taking part in this historic event in our church. FAVORITE PARTS: The total delight at walking down that aisle, in that beloved church, with this astonishing collection of friends, family and colleagues, as well as fellow church members, on the arm of Elaine’s beloved Uncle Joe. And the confetti of fallen white petals from the trees in the church driveway as we were driven away in the “love car,” and the rainbow in the sky as we arrived home. SPECIAL TOUCHES: Using many types of flowers to get the closest possible look of the rainbow colors. MUSIC: Romantic oldies, some jazz, and some feminist / folk pieces.
VENDORS PHOTOGRAPHER: Amanda Summerlin VIDEOGRAPHER: Troy Patton | CTL Production OFFICIANTS: Reverend Dan Matthews Jr. and Reverend Liz Schellingerhoudt MUSIC: Charles Higgs, Renee Wilson-Wicker VENUE: St. Luke’s Episcopal Church CATERER: Roadshows Catering CAKE: O’ How Sweet TUXEDO RENTAL: Men’s Wearhouse FLOWERS: Church members Mary Graham, Ruth Claiborne, John McGee Divine JEWELERS: Topaz Gallery (artist Conni Mainne); Geode INVITATIONS: Greenvelope and Zazzle 23
Real weddings
MICHAEL & ROBERT Oct. 20, 2012
Michael and Robert Shorty-Crawford registered as official domestic partners with the Fulton County Courthouse on October 29, 2010, and they married two years later in a church wedding at First Metropolitan Community Church.
24
By KIRSTEN OTT PALLADINO OVERALL VIBE OF THE DAY: A day of pure joy and happiness SPECIAL TOUCHES: The grooms wrote tender love notes to each other before the big day. OF NOTE: The grooms included traditional wedding touches, such as the lighting of the unity candle (performed by members of their wedding party) and the blending of turquoise and lavender sands to represent their union. Next, the grooms—both African-American—jumped the broom, a ritual carried through history from slavery, when black slaves in America were not legally allowed to marry. For slaves, the broom jumping was their binding covenant with each other and their community. For modern-day husbands Michael and Robert, the act has a double meaning since Georgia does not offer marriage equality
VENDORS CEREMONY VENUE: First Metropolitan Community Church of Atlanta RECEPTION VENUE: Garden Hills Center, Buckhead PHOTOGRAPHER: Jaha Zainabu VIDEOGRAPHER: Monique Smith of Modvsone OFFICIANT: Pastor Sonya E. William of Restoration Inclusive Ministries, Inc. FLORIST: Adam’s Apple, Avondale Estates ATTIRE: Jarrod Barnes (Shug), Men’s Wearhouse CATERER: Step by Step Catering CAKE: Atlanta Cupcake Factory
25
HO
TEL
S
WE
AY
BE
T
W E K E N D G E TA
Real weddings
TIFFANY & ANGELA May 4, 2013
After legally marrying in Connecticut a month earlier, Tiffany and Angela Etue had their spring wedding surrounded by 150 of their nearest and dearest on a love-filled rainy day.
30
By KIRSTEN OTT PALLADINO OVERALL VIBE OF THE DAY: Love and excitement FAVORITE PART: The toast from our siblings SPECIAL TOUCHES: We decorated the reception venue with pictures of us throughout our relationship. OF NOTE: Tiffany walked down the aisle first and then waited for Angela to follow and meet her at the altar. Each bride walked first half of aisle with mother and then second with father. SMOOTH MOVES: We choreographed our first dance; we started slowly and then busted out our planned moves to faster songs, including “Marry the Night” by Lady GaGa and “The Way You Make Me Feel” by Michael Jackson.
VENDORS VENUE: Bradford House and Gardens, Flowery Branch, Ga., an all-inclusive ceremony and reception site, florist, caterer and event-planning venue PHOTOGRAPHER: Allen Mullins
31
Real weddings
Jelena & Dee Nov. 2, 2013
Just three months after a whirlwind 9-hour birthday bicycle scavenger hunt proposal, Dee Campanella and Jelena Crawford tied the knot at their fall wedding filled with fun, devotion and family.
34
By KIRSTEN OTT PALLADINO OVERALL VIBE OF THE DAY: It was a greatmazing day, and we kept it real and true to us: fun, relaxed and joyful. We ran in a 5K with 20 of our guests that morning; drove ourselves to and from the ceremony (getting a latte on the way). FAVORITE PART: It’s impossible to define a single favorite part, but here are a few highlights: Our niece’s reading of Nikki Giovanni’s “Love Is” poem during the ceremony, vows that made us all laugh and cry in turn, Dee’s convertible wedding dress (long to cocktail!), photo booth hilarity, the amazing knitting together of love, laughter and life in that gorgeous space. SPECIAL TOUCHES: It is Serbian custom to distill brandy at your daughter’s birth. Jelena’s father popped open a 30-plus-year-old bottle of Sljivovica and we all took a shot post-ceremony. OF NOTE: We wrote our own vows, and did not share them with each other until the ceremony.
VENDORS VENUE: Ambient + Studio PHOTOGRAPHER: LeahAndMark.com VIDEOGRAPHER: LeahAndMark.com OFFICIANT: Austin Dickson DJ: DJ YaYa CATERER: Sally Nichols Events JEWELER: Gelin Abaci STATIONERY: Paper Source DIY LIGHTING: Ambient + Studio HAIR & MAKEUP: Laura Goddard Style TABLES, CHAIRS & LINENS: The Rental Place 35
Expert advice
Family issues By Kirsten Ott Palladino
Sibling rivalry gets worse when homophobia is involved.
Q
My older brother and I have been at odds since my coming out. The rest of my family has been mostly supportive, especially my little sister. Our brother recently got engaged, and it took some prodding from my mother for me to congratulate him considering less than a month before he proposed, he likened me to a pedophile and somebody who practices bestiality. I had a hard time helping my mother understand why I was not excited for the wedding. She convinced me that although I was hurt by what he said, it was still the right thing to express congratulations. So I did. I began to calm down about the whole thing and actually felt a bit excited about their marriage and stupid for getting upset about it in the first place. Then my sister informed me that our brother wouldn’t allow her to bring her best friend to their wedding as her date because he is gay. When she told me, the anger and hurt from the earlier name calling and arguing returned. I’m not sure what to. Do I attend the wedding of somebody who is clearly unsupportive of me and would not reciprocate the favor? Or do I stand up for what I believe in and respectfully decline the invitation? If I choose not to attend, the rest of my family would be very upset and would accuse me of being childish and making mountains out of molehills. When speaking to my mother about it all, she made a good point; the wedding is not for another 14 months and there is time to iron things out. However, I don’t feel that this is something to be negotiated over with deals made back and forth to appease each side. Any advice would be helpful. 36
A
What a heartbreaking story! I’m so sorry you’ve had to endure such discrimination within your own family. Even the supportive straight members of your family don’t seem to recognize that by forgiving your brother’s behavior (or completely ignoring it), they’re condoning it and saying it’s OK. But it’s not OK, is it? Fourteen months is a long time to sort through your feelings with your brother, so I don’t think it’s time to announce your plans to not attend his wedding. Rather, I think it’s time you either make a phone call to him if you’re feeling bold or sit down to write a lengthy letter about how you’re feeling. Personally, I like letters so the recipient can’t interrupt you. Start from the beginning. Tell him everything about how it’s been growing up gay and how you’ve felt along the way. Talk to him about the struggles you’ve encountered, but also the joys you’ve felt when you’ve found love—just as he’s found love now. Be as open and honest as you can without showing your anger. When talking about actions he’s taken, start out with “I feel” instead of “You did this.” At the end of your letter, ask if he’d be willing to set some time aside to talk to you about his feelings. Give him the opportunity to show you how he can be a better man before writing him off completely. Kirsten Ott Palladino is the co-founder and editor in chief of Equally Wed, the nation’s leading gay and lesbian wedding and honeymoon magazine. Follow her on Twitter @kirstenop. Email her with your wedding questions: kirsten@equallywed.com.
Georgia’s march to marriage equality By DYANA BAGBY Georgia has not one but two laws prohibiting same-sex couples from marrying. But in recent years, recognition of our relationships has been gaining momentum and this year a lawsuit was filed to challenge the state’s constitutional amendment banning marriage equality.
1993
The Atlanta City Council passed ordinances creating a domestic partner registry and extending employee benefits to domestic partner benefits. Years of court battles challenging these ordinances ensued.
1995
The state Supreme Court ruled the city of Atlanta “exceeded its power to provide benefits to employees and their dependents by recognizing domestic partners as “a family relationship” and providing employee benefits to them “in a comparable manner … as for a spouse.”
1996
The Georgia legislature passed a bill banning same-sex marriage as part of the federal Defense of Marriage Act and Gov. Zell Miller signed it into law. The Atlanta City Council passed another ordinance to offer domestic partnership benefits to domestic partners of gay employees; Mayor Bill Campbell signed it into law. Social conservatives again legally challenge the law in court.
1996
The Georgia legislature passed a bill banning same-sex marriage as part of the federal Defense of Marriage Act and Gov. Zell Miller signed it into law. The Atlanta City Council passed another ordinance to offer domestic partnership benefits to domestic partners of gay employees; Mayor Bill Campbell signed it into law. Social conservatives again legally challenge the law in court. 38
t s
In April, Lambda Legal filed a federal class-action lawsuit on behalf of gay and lesbian couples challenging Georgia’s same-sex marriage ban.
Photo by Dyana Bagby
1997
The Fulton County Superior Court ruled the city of Atlanta’s DP benefits program is unconstitutional. The state Supreme Court overturned the Fulton County Superior Court and ruled the city of Atlanta can offer domestic partner benefits.
1999
The city of Atlanta and Cathy Woolard, the first openly gay person elected to office in Georgia as a member of the Atlanta City Council, sued Republican Insurance Commissioner John Oxendine to force him to honor the city’s domestic partnership plan. State Superior Court Wendy Shoob ordered Oxendine to approve the city of Atlanta’s domestic partnership plan.
2001
The DeKalb County Commission approved domestic partner benefits for county employees.
2003
The Fulton County Commission approved domestic partner benefits for county employees. The U.S. Supreme Court strikes down a Texas law against “homosexual conduct” and other sodomy laws around the nation.
2004
76 percent of Georgia voters approved a constitutional amendment defining marriage as only between a man and a woman.
2006
The Georgia General Assembly passed a bill authorizing local governments to enact domestic partner benefits. Athens-Clarke County Commission approved domestic partner benefits for gay and straight county employees. Doraville City Council voted to approve domestic partner benefits for same-sex couples. Continued on page 40 39
Atlanta City Councilmember Alex Wan with Atlanta Mayor Kasim Reed as he signs the resolution the City Council approved in support of same-sex marriage.
Continued from page 39
2007
Georgia Equality lobbied the General Assembly successfully to ensure same-sex couples have the right to hospital visitation and ambulance ride along privileges included in the state’s Advanced Health Care Directive. Georgia Equality, state Rep. Karla Drenner and LGBT supporters prevented the introduction of a constitutional amendment that would have banned adoption by LGBT couples.
2010
The Savanna City Council voted unanimously to authorize the city manager to implement a domestic partner program for city employees.
2011
Almost 30,000 same-sex couples live together in Georgia, according to data released by the Williams Institute using data from the 2010 Census, and more than 28 percent are raising children. The total numbers show a sharp increase from the 19,288 same-sex unmarried partners reported in the state in the 2000 Census.
2012
The Atlanta City Council passed a resolution supporting marriage equality. Mayor Kasim Reed signed the resolution and states his support for same-sex marriage.
2013
IRS announces all legally married same-sex couples, even those married in Georgia and other states that do not recognize same-sex marriage, will be treated as married for federal tax purposes. Public Policy Polling finds that 57 percent of Georgians support at least civil unions for same-sex couples with only 39 percent opposing any kind of legal recognition at all. The Avondale Estates Mayor and Board of Commissioner approved a domestic partnership registry for residents. Democratic Party of Georgia’s chair DuBose Porter stated he supports marriage equality. Porter is the former Speaker of the House in the Georgia General Assembly and in 2004 voted twice to support the state’s constitutional ban on same-sex marriage. The Decatur City Commission voted to create a domestic partnership registry for gay and unmarried straight couples.
2014
The UCLA Williams Institute releases a study that states Georgia’s ban on same-sex marriage is costing the state $78.8 million. The study reports more than 10,600 same-sex couples would marry in the first three years if the ban was struck down. Lambda Legal filed a federal class-action lawsuit against Georgia officials challenging the state’s ban on same-sex marriage. Republican Attorney General Sam Olens is defending the state in the lawsuit; his Democratic opponent in the November election, Greg Hecht, announced he supports same-sex marriage and if elected will not defend the lawsuit. 40
Protecting your assets
Should we have a prenup? By KATHLEEN WOMACK, Attorney at Law
M
any couples wishing to marry and protect their personal assets in the event of a divorce often have prenuptial agreements. The answer whether you should you enter into a prenup is … it depends. Typical lawyer non-answer. Here is the problem. We are all waiting for at least five United States Supreme Court Justices to recognize that state bans against same-sex marriage violate the United States Constitution. We don’t know if that will be in one year, or two years, or maybe never, depending on federal elections and politics. When (or if) that happens, same-sex marriages will be recognized here in Georgia. Which means couples can also get divorced in Georgia and prenuptial agreements will be enforced in such divorce actions. In that case, yes, by all means, have a prenup before you go out of state to get married. In the meantime, we have to deal with the reality of the current law in Georgia. The Georgia Constitution and state law prohibits same-sex marriage, prohibits the recognition of same-sex marriages performed in other states, and strips Georgia courts from jurisdiction for all issues relating to any such marriage. Married couples in Georgia cannot file for divorce and any prenup agreement will not be enforced in any court in Georgia. This is where things get complicated. Since Georgia couples can’t get divorced here, it is important where they get married. Most states allowing same-sex marriage require parties to live there for a period of time for the courts in that state to have jurisdiction to dissolve the marriage. New York, for example, is a popular place for couples to go to take in a Broadway show, and get married while they are there. The problem is if they later want to get divorced, one of them has to
move there and live for at least a year for the New York courts to have jurisdiction to grant them a divorce. One solution is to marry in jurisdictions such as California and Washington D.C., which allow same-sex couples married in those jurisdictions to divorce there without having to move and live there, provided each party lives in a state which will not grant them a divorce (Georgia). But we have yet to know how such a court would handle a contested divorce when the parties do not reside there. No lawyer yet has handled such a case that I am aware of. A prenup agreement would likely encourage the parties to settle rather than risk uncertainty in such a divorce action. For that reason alone, a prenup would be an excellent idea. So if a couple wants a prenuptial agreement before getting married, the attorney drafting the agreement needs to know where they plan to get married, since that state may be the state that will ultimately grant a future divorce. And that state will most likely apply that state’s law in deciding who gets what, and whether or not the prenup is valid. Some states require both parties to have separate attorneys represent them in the drafting of a prenup. (Georgia does not.) Each party would need a separate lawyer in the state where they plan to marry, in addition to the Georgia attorney or attorneys drafting the document. Good news for lawyers, bad news for clients. Understand now why the answer to the question is … it depends? It depends on the facts involved with each couple planning to marry. Kathleen Womack has practiced law in Atlanta for over 28 years. Further information at www.kwomacklaw.com. 41
Flowers and more
Sweet succulents
Opt for one or more of these earthy elements to show your love of nature By Kirsten Ott Palladino
I
mplementing plants is a handsome way to bring natural elements into the look and feel of your wedding day. Whether you mix it with classic decor to add a touch of modern or incorporate it into an outdoor affair to create a rustic vibe, succulents add earthy flare. They’re especially appealing for a two-groom wedding or for any couple who doesn’t want an overtly feminine wedding. “Using succulents is a great way to keep your wedding going long after it’s over,” said Liz Gudmundsson, owner of Adaptation Floral Design, located in the Old Fourth Ward. “Any cut succulents used in the wedding will begin to root within a week, just leave them out—free of any tape or wire used—and wait. Once they have a good amount of root growth just plant them in some soil and watch them grow!” Photos by Liz Gudmundsson
42
Cheers
We’ll toast to that! Four ways to add local flavor to a craft beer lover’s wedding By Liza Dunning
Here are a few recommendations on how to incorporate local craft brews into your wedding:
Midtown and has two event facilities—the Tasting Room and the Reel Room, which capture the energy and atmosphere of Sweetwater’s laid-back, fun-loving brand. The Tasting Room also offers an indoor/outdoor option with their expansive patio, a great addition for live music. For more of a rustic al fresco atmosphere, Terrapin Beer Company (just outside of Athens) has a farm-like event space complete with a large outdoor field, tent, stage for a band, specialty glassware, custom signage for the event, and of course, Terrapin Beers for everyone! Make a tour of the production facility into an educational (and optional) part of the evening.
OPT FOR A BREWERY RECEPTION Not all breweries have the space to hold parties. But there are a handful in Atlanta that are known for hosting unique events. SweetWater Brewing, the South’s second largest craft brewery and the first to put their beer-making stake in the Atlanta market, is located in the heart of
SIP AND SAVOR AT A TASTING TABLE Skip the chocolate fondue fountain. This is an interactive way for guests to enjoy an interactive and interesting way to learn about and taste different styles of beer that are available in the area. Focus on lesser-known styles of beer for the region like sours or seasonal
O
f course, Champagne is the expected bubbly of choice at many a wedding party. But as the craft beer movement picks up in Georgia, so has the presence and appreciation of local microbrews. And with so many amazing ales, IPAs, saisons and sours being brewed around the corner from us, it’s the perfect personal touch—a way to toast to eternal love… and to the shared love of good beer.
44
saisons from the recently opened Orpheus Brewing in Midtown Atlanta. “Our reason for being is to bring unique flavors of beers to the area that have so far not existed in the region,” explains Will Arnold of Orpheus Brewing. “So this is an exciting thing for beer lovers to taste and experience beers that now, with Orpheus, are representative of the region.” Arnold also recommends moving from the lightest brew to the darkest or heaviest so as to progress through to the stronger flavors. Their rotation of sours includes the Wandering Blues and the Serpent Bite. And each season, they introduce a new IPA and saison worth checking out. OFFER A COURSED BEER DINNER For those who are craft beer lovers and foodies by nature, why not marry together culinary dishes with perfectly paired brews? “Eric Johson, our brewmaster, is making beers that thoughtfully pair well with food and are very culinary in influence,” explains Wild Heaven cofounder, Nick Purdy. “They’re unlike any beer in the region. And, really, beyond the region because he is looking at these beers and their ingredients the way a high-end chef would look at a dish.” Take their popular Eschaton, for example. The Eschaton, Belgian-style quadruple ale, aged on pinot noir oak chips, is a big, malty beer that actually evokes a good red wine on the palate. “It pairs well with lamb, rabbit, duck, Stilton cheese, Belgian chocolate and tart fruit desserts,” Purdy continues. “Normally, people
might think of beer going well with pretzels or burgers, but our beers are a little different. We can talk about pairing them like you would talk about with wines, because the flavors are truly complementary to a meal.” Wild Heaven’s popular White Blackbird is another great pairing—a Belgian-style saison brewed with pink peppercorns and Korean pears that are marinated in Chardonnay and then added to the fermentation along with French oak. A coursed dinner that pairs each dish with a different brew? Sounds like a match made in heaven. GO VINTAGE WITH BARREL-AGED BEERS Using vintage wooden casks and barrel-aging beers is a recent trend in the craft beer scene. Brewers let their beer “age” in casks that once housed bourbon or wine, letting them soak up the flavors and aromas of the spirit that previously inhabited the wooden barrel. “It makes things more interesting,” says Will Arnold of Orpheus. “And it can really be exciting to see what flavors come through once they are ready to drink. We filled the first of five barrels last week and will fill another 45 in the next few weeks to be released down the road. It’s a very vintage and artisanal type of process, so it makes sense to open and enjoy these on special occasions.” If you’re looking to source local craft beers by the keg, bottle or even barrel-aged cask, you can usually find these brews through local distributors or at craft retailers and growler stores like Ale Yeah! and HopCity. Or at a typical retailer like Green’s. And while there’s no reason to forsake the celebratory toast of Champagne on your big day, adding the craft beer movement to your celebration is one great way to make it even more special. Photos courtesy of Wild Heaven (left) and Orpheus Brewing (right) 45
SPECIAL ADVERTISING SECTION
Atlanta History Center | Atlanta, GA 404-814-4090 | www.atlantahistorycenter.com/events Experience the elegance at Swan House with stately columns, majestic fountains and private lawns. Be surrounded by natural beauty on our Museum terraces and from a wall of windows in the Grand Overlook ballroom which features wood floors and barrel vaulted ceiling. Enjoy a peaceful setting among the trees at the rustic Smith Family Farm.
10th & Piedmont www.CommunitasHospitality.com Let us serve you a great wedding at our chic 10th & Piedmont with our friendly staff and unconditional hospitality. Cocktail or Sit-down style, 10th & Piedmont provides an ideal venue with build in A/V equipment, DJ booth, open air feeling and great midtown views. E-mail gilbert to get your special event under way: Gilbert@CommunitasHospitality.com
Cooper Piano | Atlanta, GA 404-329-1027 | www.cooperpiano.com At Cooper Piano, we rent a variety of pianos for any occasion, including weddings and commitment ceremonies. Our pianos arrive ontime and are performance ready. We can also provide an on-site tuner. Need a pianist? Let us know! We can connect you with a talented performer and we will match any price.
Digital Memories by Christy | Atlanta, GA 770-599-0212 | www.DigitalMemoriesbyChristy.com When real love manifests itself in two people, we are honored to be the ones chosen to show the world what that looks like. We are located in historic Senoia, GA, serve the Greater Atlanta area as well as destinations worldwide. Christy’s passion is celebratinglove through photography. Est. January 2000.
Margaret Mitchell House
404-814-4090 | www.atlantahistorycenter.com/events Discover the picturesque ambiance of this Midtown historic site which includes manicured lawns surrounded by trees and urban landscape; the Tudor revival house featuring the apartment where she penned “Gone With the Wind,” five intimate parlor rooms and covered porches; and Commercial Row a historic retail building featuring large windows and an open loft feel.
Maui Sunseeker LGBT Resort | Kihei, HI 800-532-MAUI | www.mauisunseeker.com Haiwaii’s largest LGBT resort, Maui Sunseeker LGBT Resort is the premier destination for gay and lesbian weddings and the most romantic honeymoons. Space is available at the Maui Sunseeker for your ceremony and/or your reception. Choose from two locations on our property and five different package options.
Rainbow Bells | Niagara Falls, NY 716-777-4555 | www.rainbowbells.com Get hitched in Niagara Falls! You set the date, we do the rest. Rainbow Bells is a fullservice boutique concierge company that provides complete consulting /services forsame-sex marriages. Every element of your celebration will be coordinated flawlessly. Nocelebration is too big or too small. Sit back, relax and leave the rest to us.
Something Special Events | Newnan, GA 770-251-1206 | www.sspecial.net A special events facility in a beautiful circa 1859 Antebellum Home and Garden. Featuringstained glass windows, winding staircase and a wraparound porch. A beautiful ballroom overlooking landscaped gardens with fountains and a Victorian gazebo. OfferingIn-house catering, all inclusive or a’ la carte wedding packages, and dual wedding/commitment packages featuring civil ceremonies in Maryland.
SPECIAL ADVERTISING SECTION
MarriageLegal.com
Legal documents can protect your marriage Marital rights are important. Legally-married couples can inherit each other’s property, participate jointly in raising or adopting children, visit each other in the hospital, make medical decisions, share finances, and sue for a fair divorce (if it ever becomes necessary). Even though Georgia has yet to recognize gay marriage, you can still obtain many marital rights. With basic legal documents, you and your partner can create many of the rights, privileges and responsibilities that States grant recognized marriages. For example, many hospitals have laws or rules prohibiting just anyone from visiting you in the hospital. These are important especially when the patient is unconscious. While family is normally allowed to visit, if your marriage is not legally recognized, then your partner may be denied access if you are in the hospital. There is an easy fix to this, you can simply pre-authorize loved ones. Federal Law states that hospitals must recognize and acknowledge these types of legal documents. Since everyone at all hospitals might not be aware of this law, you can easily print and keep a copy
4
LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT
Ensure your partner inherits your assets. Control what happens after you pass.
4
POWER OF ATTORNEY FOR FINANCE
4
MarriageLegal.com, an Atlanta-based project, not only provides an easy and intuitive way to learn about legal issues Georgia couples face, but also lets you create your own legal documents to protect your marriage, all drafted by Georgia lawyers. of the law in the glove box of your car or other convenient place to provide a printable copy of this law to keep with the visitation authorization documents. That’s only one example. To learn more, visit marriagelegal.com.
LIVING TOGETHER AGREEMENT
4
Married couples can use courts to fairly resolve a breakup (divorce). You can too, using contracts instead.
4
HOSPITAL VISITATION
Give your partner access to your bank and finances, but only if you become incapacitated or unable to manage your own affairs.
4
Many are denied access to the hospital treating their partner, because they are not family. Avoid this by pre-authorizing each other pursuant to federal law.
ADVANCE DIRECTIVE FOR HEALTHCARE Authorize your partner to make medical decisions on your behalf if you are unconscious or otherwise unable.
POWER OF ATTORNEY FOR MINOR Enable the non-parent to make decisions for the child regarding things like school, healthcare and others. Can be used before birth, if one of you is currently pregnant.
A MEMO RABLE SETTING FOR YOUR U NF O R GETTABLE DAY
At the AAA Five Diamond-rated InterContinental® Buckhead Atlanta, weddings and special events take on a whole new perspective. Our contemporary and customizable ballrooms are among the largest in Atlanta. Additionally, all ballrooms open to our 25,000 sq. ft. Windsor Garden, allowing for both indoor and outdoor nuptials. We’re proud to offer a fully-compliant Kosher Kitchen to comply to even the most rigid guidelines.
For more information please contact Brian Ettelman, Director of Catering and Convention Services at (404) 946–9119 or brian.ettelman@ihg.com www.intercontinentalatlanta.com I n o v e r 1 7 0 l o c a t i o n s a c r o s s t h e g l o b e i n c l u d i n g H O N G K O N G • L O N D O N • N E W Y O R K • PA R I S
InterContinental Buckhead Atlanta_Georgia Voice Gay Weddings_Fall 2014.indd 1
9/29/14 2:20 PM
AtlantaHistoryCenter.com/Rentals SpecialEvents@AtlantaHistoryCenter.com 404.814.4090