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SINGAPORE issue 1 SEPTEMBER 2013

Eeny Meeny Miney

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Published by cogent media MCI (P) 114/08/2013

Mo

Choosing a Pre-school

Unleash the

Beast!

Travel made fun & educational

The World’s

youngest App Developer Parenting a Prodigy

WORKAHOLICS, be ASHAMED!

Not Your Average

SUPERMOM

Rock the House

A chat with Senior Minister of State Josephine Teo

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

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A member of Thomson Medical group Sept 2013 • Family & Life

3

Contents NEWS 6

8

Smartphones & More

t now is the hat you’re holding in your hands righ erever you inaugural issue of Family & Life. Wh clinic, country ital, hosp picked us up, whether it was from a something been have t mus e club or your own mailbox, ther the design that must about the cover lines, the masthead or ed you to flip through have resonated with you and compell to thank you. our magazine. For that, we would like

W

COVERSTORY 8

Rock The House

FOCUS

10 A Spark of Genius 12 Not Your Average Supermom

12

NURTURE

14 Eeny, Meeny, Miney, Mo

Dear Reader,

— Choosing a Preschool

16 Learning the Language of Fun 18 G.A.M.E.S

— Gaming Always Might Endanger Some 20 Don’t You Worry, Child 22 Up Close & Personal

HEALTH

24 Baby, You’ve Changed Me 26 Hush Now, Don’t You Cry 28 Weighed Down by Obesity

Happy Reading!

RELAX

30 Unleash the Beast 32 Just Say ‘No’ 34 Get A Life

16

and together has been at times laborious The journey in putting this first issue ess of proc the like h muc , time e sam the at incredibly tiring but yet deeply fulfilling e glad we’r and , it sounds, that this is our baby child-birth. You could say, as cliche as joy. that you, dear reader, can share in our we r and for all of us, there is nothing that After all, blood runs thicker than wate dren chil our it’s going the extra mile for would not do for our families, whether ister of State Josephine Teo (page 8) or Min ior Sen just like our Cover Personality, so walking from therapist to therapist just carrying them with our bare hands and t wen im Singapore 2013 Christy Chung-L that they can get better, like what Mrs just smiles and public appearances, they are the through (page 12). Indeed, behind ones. d love our for ms drea but full of hope and like the rest of us — unsure, tentative e, from een our covers for every parent out ther ily There are loads more to be found betw fam the suit to ucts and recipes, all catered eduction, health and nutrition to prod e. stor in have we to discover what else lifestyle in Singapore. We’ll leave you red and opinions about the issues we’ve cove Please do leave us your own thoughts by dren chil g rdin en our doctors to share rega and the tips and tricks that we’ve gott from hear to t wan do we andlife.sg) because dropping us an e-mail (editorial@family leave book (fb.com/familyandlifemag) and Face on us ’ ‘like se plea you. Alternatively, your comments there.

You can our very first issue of Family & Life.

In the meantime, we hope you enjoy .sg). (familyandlife also download a copy at our website

Managing Editor Gerald Woon

BUYS

www.familyandlife.sg

36 Dreams of the Crop Managing Editor

EDITORIAL

BITES

38 Love’s Kitchen 40 Food for Thought 42 Forbidden Foods

CREATIVE

— The Truth about Food Allergies

SALES & MARKETING

CONTRIBUTORS

HAPPENINGS

44 A List of Events

26

ADMINISTRATION & FINANCE

OP-ED

46 My two cents on...

Gerald Woon gerald@cogentmedia.sg Writer | Farhan Shah farhan@cogentmedia.sg Designer | Zach zach@cogentmedia.sg Senior Marketing Executive| Emily Choo emily@cogentmedia.sg Marketing Executive | Lim Jun Ming junming@cogentmedia.sg Aloysius Chow Andre Frois Dr Christopher Ng Dr Cindy Ho Dr Soh Jian Yi Michelle Zhu Manager | Jessica Ong jessica@cogentmedia.sg

CONTACT US Editorial Enquiries editorial@familyandlife.sg

Advertising Enquiries

Tel: +65 6704 9279

Email: sales@cogentmedia.sg

Helicopter Parenting

MCI (P) 114/08/2013 Colour Separation & Printed by Times Printers Private Limited 16 Tuas Avenue 5, Singapore 639340 Tel: +65 6311 2888 Fax: +65 6311 2801 Licence No. L021/09/2012 Distributed by MediaWheel Singapore 31 Toh Guan Road East #07-01 LW Technocentre, Singapore 608608 Tel: +65 6560 5272 Fax: +65 6560 4090 All materials printed within Family & Life are Copyright 2013 © and protected under the Copyright Act. All rights reserved 2013.

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

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No material of this publication can be reproduced in any form or means – graphic, electronic, mechanic, photocopying, recording, videotaping, etc. – whether in part or in whole, without the written consent of the Publisher. Family & Life will not be held responsible for any infringements of Copyright material in articles submitted by contributors. While every reasonable care has been taken in the compilation of information contained in this publication, the Publisher, editors or their employees and agents shall not be liable for any errors, inaccuracies, and/or omissions howsoever caused. All views expressed in all articles are solely those of the authors, and are not necessarily those of the Publisher and editor. Family & Life reserves the right to refuse any advertisement or advertorial for any reason and are not liable for claims made by advertisers. The information provided in this publication is solely for reference only. Readers are advised to seek the professional advice from the appropriate advisors, professional or institution for advice and instruction with regard to their personal health issues.

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

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NEWs Improved Screening for GI Symptoms To help paediatricians and general practitioners to better diagnose and manage common gastrointestinal (GI) symptoms more easily, Abbott and leading paediatric experts around the world have developed a new paediatric screening tool, the Gastrointestinal Problem Solver (GPS).

This tool comprises five algorithms to address the most frequent feeding issues in infants: infant regurgitation, fussiness or gassiness, constipation, infantile colic and cow’s milk protein allergy – and has been endorsed by the ASEA Paediatric Federation. It allows healthcare practitioners to hone in on an accurate diagnosis and develop an appropriate treatment plan, with the aid of an in-depth patient profiler with recommended nutritional modifications for each of the five common intolerance issues.

Said Prof Lee Bee Wah, Visiting Senior Consultant Paediatrician, Children’s Medical Institute, National University Hospital, “The goal of the new screening tool is to provide doctors with a standard benchmark of care in the diagnosis and management of these common symptoms of feeding intolerance.” In an early 2013 study conducted by Abbott, a survey of over 3,000 Singaporean parents and 112 doctors showed that GI symptoms are a significant source of stress for parents here.

Hampton in the Heartlands After their first incredibly successful collaboration in Bishan in 2009, the PAP Community Foundation and EtonHouse will be joining hands again to offer highquality, affordable early childhood services to Singaporean parents at their second location at Tanjong Pagar.

The new Hampton PreSchool campus at Kim Tian Road will cater to 110 children and will be exclusively managed by EtonHouse, one of the leaders in pre-school education. Apart from the carefully designed childcare programme and holistic and integrated curriculum, the new centre will also provide infant care services.

Hampton Pre-School @ Tanjong Pagar will commence operations on 2 January 2014 but they have already begun enrolment. Interested parents can get more information at www.hampton.edu.sg.

Snooze in Style over Lunch Break

Virgin Active’s first ever fitness club in Asia doesn’t only feature top-ofthe-line equipment.

Now, you won’t A new local mobile shopping and rewards have to pass application (app) has been launched in partnership by the Abu with Ossia International and VGO Corporation Dhabi Airport Limited, leading retailers in the Asia Pacific who own or be a Google over 60 retail stores in Singapore including brands employee just to such as Word of Sports, Springfield, True Religion and nap in public: Eastpak. “With ShopGuru, we seek to turn physical zero-gravity technology sleep pods – a.k.a. EnergyPods – allows workers in the retail stores into interactive worlds full of rewards CBD area grab forty winks in privacy beyond their homes. These are just part and fun,” said ShopGuru’s Co-Founder and Chief of the Relax and Recovery Zone of Virgin Active, which also offers a full steam, Operating Officer, Andrew Wong. ice and shower experience, complimentary footbaths and reflexology, and even a rejuvenating salt inhalation room.

This software will allow users to collect reward points whenever they walk into or spend at a participating With the recent opening of the Singapore outlet in May, Virgin Active now store, scan promotional QR codes and barcodes of has 269 clubs around the world. No long-term commitment is required to certain items, and browse retailer offers through the be a Virgin Active member, as club members will be able to sign up for an app. Collected points can be exchanged for items such initial four-week period, which renews in fortnightly increments should as complimentary beverages and gift vouchers, or individuals decide to retain their membership. even used as donations to charity. The ShopGuru App is now available for free from the App Store on iPhone or from the Google Playstore.

New Mobile Shopping Rewards App

Paediatric Dentists are Writers and Avid Facebook Users, Too The National Dental Centre Singapore brings parents a step closer to local paediatric dentists with the launch of their new Facebook page, www.facebook. com/PaediatricDentistryNDC. This is the only portal in Singapore written by the experts themselves, with an aim to give parents current and practical information on children’s oral health issues without the medical jargon. With the right knowledge and an early start to good oral health habits, paediatric dentists at NDCS hope to partner parents and their kids to grow great smiles for life.

Your New Companion in the Motherhood Journey The exhilarating and rewarding journey of motherhood begins when a woman is pregnant, and a varied and well-balanced diet is critical in ensuring that babies receive the best nutrition from their mothers. To support this, Nestlé Singapore recently launched NESTLÉ MOM & ME, a premium nutritional supplement specifically designed for pregnant and breastfeeding mothers.

It is the only supplement in the market with BIFIDUS BL probiotics, which helps to maintain a healthy digestive system, and is formulated with a unique combination of nutrients to meet a mother’s increased needs during pregnancy and lactation.

“A baby’s development relies on essential nutrients that only a mother can provide through daily good nutrition…and NESTLÉ MOM & ME aims to fulfil these nutritional needs for both mother and baby,” Country Business Manager Heng Peng Kwang said.

NESTLÉ MOM & ME is retailing at S$15 per 400g tin.

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

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COVERSTORY Vivacious politician Mrs Josephine Teo never lacks the drive to push for changes in the system, nor the ingenuity to be a better parent to her three children. She sits down with Family & Life and talks about work, family and her rebellious youth.

Senior Minister of State for Finance and Transport Mrs Josephine Teo confesses to having been quite the rebel in her youth.

“Being the eldest of three kids, I was naturally the key subject of my parents’ watchful eyes. They had my interests at heart but I was too young to understand.

When I was upset with them for poking their noses into my affairs, I would ‘run away’ to my grandma’s home,” she divulges.

“On one occasion, I got a big scolding for getting home past 8 pm. Unbelievable, right? The next day, I really tried to run away, but good sense got the better of me and I went home before midnight.”

A svelte and active character, the 45-yearold often only manages four to five hours of sleep while serving her nation and tending to the residents of Bishan Toa Payoh GRC, of which she has been a faithful servant and Grassroots Adviser for many years. Having served memorable tenures in A*STAR, EDB and NTUC, Josephine is now married with three children of her own – a boy and twin girls – who have taught her to enjoy their colourful traits, which she too once projected on her parents. “Simon is 15 and my twin girls are 13. Simon is thoughtful and conscientious, Jaime is artistic and considerate. Nicole is quick-witted and vibrant. All three have a good sense of humour and are family-loving.”

However, the notable proponent of measures to better benefit educators and the workforce, now finds herself in the same predicament as her parents, having to manage the quirks of her children.

“My husband and I have always tried to reason with them and give them space

Rock ouse H The

By Andre Frois

We’re tested each time they come home with a bad test score. That’s when our kids can tell if we really mean what we say. Tuition can be useful if they need extra coaching, but it’s not the right solution for all students, especially those who aren’t motivated.

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

so that there are no major disagreements or conflicts,” she discloses, along with an essential policy that she holds in high regard. “Our children do point out our mistakes and inconsistencies, and it is important that we are willing to apologise,” she says.

As a busy professional whose occupation and country always demand her utmost commitment, the eldest daughter of a policewoman and a businessman has had to craft numerous ideas in order to frequently touch base with her secondary school-going children. “In public life, it’s very hard for me to commit to say dinnerwith-family every evening. Moreover, my husband travels for work and the kids have their CCA commitments. For practical reasons, we’ve made the study our family’s meeting point. All of us use the study for work and so naturally, this is the place

to catch up with one another, whoever happens to be home.”

“We’re tested each time they come home with a bad test score. That’s when our kids can tell if we really mean what we say,” elaborates the highly-decorated NUS graduate. Despite her hectic daily itinerary, she makes time to tutor her children. And if she’s too busy, she reluctantly arranges for their scholastic needs to be met.

“Tuition can be useful if they need extra coaching, but it’s not the right solution for all students, especially those who aren’t motivated.” She regards the Singapore schools not just as an institution of learning, but more importantly as a place of character building.

“We would like our children to do well academically, but it’s not the end of the world if they don’t. Everyone has something they’re good at and our role as parents is to help our kids discover their strengths. It’s more important that my children have tried their best and develop life skills such as coping with failure and disappointment. We also believe children must learn to take responsibility for themselves and not expect good things to just fall in their laps. If they do badly in any subject, we ask them to figure out if it is due to a lack of understanding, inadequate preparation or sheer carelessness. They have to learn how to do better on their own.”

The former school basketball team player understands the value of experiences from team sports and has been very encouraging

We would like our children to do well academically, but it’s not the end of the world if they don’t. Everyone has something they’re good at, and our role as parents is to help our kids discover their strengths. towards her three children’s athletic pursuits, sharing, “I’m very proud of my son’s involvement in his school’s canoeing team. His training regimen is rigorous and the discipline of the entire team speaks well of them. They don’t always win the races but there are lessons in failure that are worth learning too. My daughters are both involved in netball, which is also a team sport. Again, apart from acquiring an active lifestyle, netball helps them to build valuable social skills.”

Having raised a family of avid adventurers, she also fondly recalls how plights abroad have helped bring out the best in her children’s characters. “One very precious memory was when we went for a walk in the mountains in New Zealand. The walk turned out to be much longer and more treacherous than we expected. Moreover, it was a hot day and we ran out of water. I was really quite terrified of the physical risks we had put the kids under. But the children willingly pressed on, and we encouraged one another not to give up.

I was so proud of them.”

The former alumnus of Dunman High and Raffles Junior College explains her stringent but flexible stance on parenting, saying, “in

terms of what the children do with their lives, I see our role as parents as being much like a coach. We can share lessons, point out what we see are the kids’ strengths and what they could do well in. We can highlight risks and pitfalls, and be there to support them if they fall. Ultimately though, they have to discover what makes them happy and take responsibility to build their own lives. It’s their game, after all.”

For someone whose heart is in the welfare of her fellow countrymen, how much does Josephine expose her children to the sensitive world of politics?

“Unlike just a few years ago, politics has become very much a part of social conversations in Singapore. As a family, we talk about a whole range of subjects including politics. When we travel or watch movies together and the subject of politics comes up, we’ll share what we know and what we think.”

My husband and I have always tried to reason with them and give them space so that there are no major disagreements or conflicts. Our children do point out our mistakes and inconsistencies, and it is important that we are willing to apologise.

Might they ever follow in her footsteps?

“I don’t know whether my children will take an interest beyond that of an active citizen, and I would respect their wishes either way,” she reveals with a smile.

Mother Knows Bes

t

Joseph ine sha res her secrets Hand In to goo H d pare “ The f and nting. o u n d ation betwee o f n and gr dad and m a strong dad anow as a coup um. We have family is th family. d mum have le. Sorry for to invest tim e relationsh around I notice man to provide sounding so e in each oth ip co er y paren co their kid ts allowllective leade rporate, but s. rship t ing the Over t o ir lives to revothe childre ime, their o lve n w holds t grow up, n relation s h t h h e ip e f a parent mily to weaken and I s g foster amake it a poether also los grow apart. s, and as th assura sense of sh int to nour es its strengt The glue th e well at nce that all isared family vaish our relatioh. My husbanat home.” well be lu d tween es. Our childnship and to us and ren hav The Lo by exte e nsion, the “One t ving Disciplin all is h a in r ia g n I’ve lea childre r n n no m . It starts f t is that the serious oral unders rom the timre is a right w conseq commitmentanding. Th e they are ay to disciplin physica uences of h t to helping is methodolittle and ha e notice l punishmen is actions, a the child u logy involv ve e and ne n ver exct – not in an d the appronderstand th s ger, alw e essively priate It also use of . ays wit in v o h lv adequa es sho disapp te primar rove of spec wing the kids if y ic y o s u c b h e lo ool, I positi haviou ve th been a v e b e h a v i o would say rs. Before ouem even if yo t rk u great jo he u r orie y.” ntationy a l r e a d y ids entered had v s and er p a re n t ing ha y s

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

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FOCus

A Spark of

Genius

By Farhan Shah

:PART

one

Four years ago, a then 9-year-old Singaporean boy with a cheeky grin and an unruly mop of hair made headlines all over the world for being the world’s youngest iPhone app developer.

All Lim Ding Wen wanted to do was to write a drawing programme for his sisters who loved to draw. Now, to date, his free drawing app called Doodle Kids has been amazingly downloaded more than 700,000 times and has even been featured in an Apple promotion video.

Being singled out as a child I feel this is the most important prodigy by the adoring media issue that most parents fail to can be a catalyst to greater grasp. Right now, most parents things. However, while the spotlight shines on the kid, want their children to learn many people forget the two While Ding Wen was basking in the media how to use the computer. supporting characters who limelight, his father, Lim Thye Chean, stood proudly on the sidelines. To him, the have played a major role in interviews were the perfect opportunity the kid’s development – the for his son to learn how to communicate up his programmes and set to work to code their children to learn how to use the Doodle Kids for the iPhone. computer. However, most children parents. In Part One of this with others. think of the computer as a means to an two-part series, Family & Amazingly, Ding Wen took just one day It’s Not About The Money end. For example, Ding Wen’s end was Life talks to the parents of Thye Chean, who is an esteemed to finish the app and, as they say, the rest the game he programmed. By focusing the world’s youngest iPhone developer in his own right, has never seen is history. on what the child wants to get out of the process, he or she will enjoy the developer and discover Ding Wen’s amazing talent as a chance to The Key Ingredient to Genius make money.

In fact, he has rejected any journey.” that the secret ingredient and all suggestions for commercialisation Thye Chean reveals that they never did to genius might not be as and advertisements that came after his anything out of the ordinary to nurture Ding And enjoy the journey they did. complicated as you think. son’s success. “We believe that as a young Wen’s innate talent for coding. There were no To encourage him during the app kid, Ding Wen should focus on his studies and not about making money,” says Thye Chean.

It is This grounded attitude towards life that kept the Lim family on an even keel despite the barrage of media attention they received in 2009. And even though the spotlight has gradually dimmed over the years, the family has remained unaffected, regularly going to the cinemas or to the beaches to play and bond together as a family.

Thanks to Thye Chean and his wife’s guiding hand, Ding Wen has grown up to be an intelligent teenage boy who, just like his peers, prefers spending time with his friends over his family and enjoys playing the occasional computer game on the machine that first shot him to stardom.

A Prodigy At Work

While Ding Wen was basking in the media limelight, his father, Lim Thye Chean, stood proudly on the sidelines.

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

Watching Ding Wen blasting virtual enemies with his mouse and keyboard, one could never have guessed that this lanky teenager is the same child prodigy who managed to master the PASCAL programming language, a course normally taught in university classes, by the time he was 8-years-old.

Using this incredible knowledge, Ding Wen developed Doodle Kids in just two nights as well as a complex game titled Invader Wars, which he worked on and off for about a year during his free time, for an old Apple computer called the Apple IIGS. Then, when Thye Chean started dabbling in app development for the iPhone as part of his job, Ding Wen also requested to learn the language. Of course, the first project that Ding Wen decided to do was to rewrite Doodle Kids for the iPhone. He sat down in front of his computer, booted

brewed herbal concoctions or intense lessons by the computer to hammer home the programming language. Instead, the Chief Technology Officer in his own company only had one secret ingredient: fun.

development process, Thye Chean also created a similar app and uploaded it to the app store. Then, father and son would compare their download numbers at the end of each day to see who was winning.

“Actually, I never taught Ding Wen a programming language. Instead, I taught him how to write a game. Learning a programming language is part of writing a game, so Ding Wen never thought that he was learning how to program. Rather, he was enjoying the progress of writing his own game and letting it come to life,” says Thye Chean.

Of course, Ding Wen was ahead by miles but that did not bother Thye Chean, who only wanted to see his son smile.

That has always been Thye Chean’s wish in life, even up till now. Although Ding Wen does not program as much as he used to in the past, Thye Chean is unruffled. To him, it has never been about the money or the fame. It has always been about making his son, and by extension his entire family, happy.

He continues, “I feel this is the most important issue that most parents fail to grasp. Right now, most parents want

And he is doing a terrific job at it.

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Sept 2013 • Family & Life

11

FOCus

Super

Not Your Average

M m

Most women would find it a challenge to manage both children and a fulltime career, but that’s just the tip of the iceberg for Christy Chung-Lim. Just like the rest of us, the 38-yearold superwoman only has 24 hours a day, but proves herself a Jill of all trades: a loving wife and mother, a driven career woman, and Mrs Singapore 2013.

Christy says she’s a late-bloomer in the looks department, and with her almost-superhuman schedule, it is fully imaginable how taking part in a beauty pageant would be the last thing on her mind. But a panel of judges all agreed that she bloomed beautifully, as the full-time senior lecturer at Ngee Ann Polytechnic’s School of Business and Accountancy was crowned Mrs Singapore Universe 2013 just hours away from Mother’s Day this year.

It’s not all glitz and glamour for Christy, whose life can’t seem to get any more mind-boggling. Take for example when she survived winter alone in Ithaca, New York in 2007. There, she emerged as a Gold Medallist in her Master of Management in Hospitality (MMH) course from the Singapore Tourism Board/Cornell-Nanyang Institute of Hospitality (CNI). She accomplished this while giving birth to her fourth child, Noah, during her stay.

The mother of five attributes her incredible multitasking abilities to simply “discipline in time management” and help from her husband of 12 years, Nicholas, whom she refers to as “a very hands-on father”.

Did you ever imagine having five children?

I’ve always wanted to have a big family. Growing up as the only child in a single parent family, I know how lonely it can be when there’s only my mum whom I could turn to when facing major decisions in life. Age is not on my side, and given the last trying pregnancy carrying my youngest son, our factory is closed for the time being!

Photo courtesy of LightedpixelsPixies

Tell us more about your kids.

Claire is 13, and loves to bake. She is currently in Singapore Chinese Girls’ School Integrated Programme, and was formerly the head-prefect of St. Anthony’s Primary School (SAPS) in 2012.

Nigel is a 10-year-old sportsman in the SAPS badminton team, and represented his school in a recently concluded interschool competition.

Chloe is 9, also in SAPS, and an aspiring artist. She won the 2nd prize in the recent HDB nation-wide Heartlanders Art Competition.

Noah is 6 and Nathaniel is 2. Both of them are in The Caterpillars’ Cove Child Development and Study Centre. Noah is an avid reader, while Nathaniel loves all things associated with modes of transport.

Having more (children) can be just as beautiful, meaning that my life is beautiful and complete because of my five children.

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

How do you find time for all of them?

It takes a lot of discipline in time management. I’d try to wake up around 5 am to prepare breakfast and lunch for the kids. The morning car rides sending Nigel & Chloe to school would be the best time to catch up. Likewise, I’d try to eat breakfast with Noah and Nathaniel at the childcare before heading to work. I spend my lunch breaks sending my kids back from school, and again that would be my touch points with them.

A typical day ends at 7 pm when I’d catch a quick dinner before setting up my “tuition centre” at home to coach the older ones in their homework. Currently, I’m trying hard not to outsource the coaching work to tuition centres, as coaching time equates bonding time.

Bed time is spent reading or playing games with Noah and Nathaniel. My favourite question to my kids is always, “Are you happy?” as I believe that kids must be happy with themselves and with what they are doing. After all, passion in what you’re doing fuels achievements.

Photo courtesy of Christy Chung-Lim

With so many children, how do you still find time for romance in your marriage?

Nicholas and I always find time to spring surprises on each other in the form of random dates and gifts, which need not coincide with special anniversaries or occasions. When things aren’t going exactly the way we’d like or when our actions irritate each other, we’d gently voice out our displeasures. Besides communicating a lot verbally, our track record of five kids says a lot more, doesn’t it?

What’s your love story?

Nicholas is in the Navy and heads the Information Fusion Centre. It was Christmas in 1993 when we met at a party. He sent me home that night, and thereafter went to ransack my senior’s locker for my phone number. Well, the rest is history.

I appreciate the fact that Nicholas reads me like an open book, and is my most honest and sincere critic. I am really blessed that this true “friend” of mine is also my lover and pillar in life.

Outsiders always say that he’s a lucky man (to have me as his wife) but I know that between us, I have always been and will always be the luckier one with him in my life. It’s icing on the cake that he’s a very hands-on father to whom I can entrust the kids for a night or two, without worrying that they will not be well-cared for or that their school work will not be completed.

How is the ‘workload’ distributed at home?

Nicholas is a very hands-on father who chips in as and when he can. I’m more of the disciplinarian at home. The kids do help to clean up after themselves, though I admit there’s more that they can do in that department.

Was there ever a low point in your life?

I was in the States doing my Master of Management when Chloe was diagnosed with autism at 2-years-old. I took a year of halftime work after I returned to Singapore, to send her for therapy and spend time with her at home.

Finances were really tight back then, and most of the time she was on my back in a sling while I travelled on foot or by public transport from therapist to therapist.

Until today, I’d still feel guilty and wonder if things would have been different if I had stayed in Singapore when she needed me most. Chloe never stops trying her best even though she is fully aware that she is “different”. I’m proud to say that she’s quite an achiever in academics and art today.

What do you have to share from your 12 years of marriage and parenting?

Having more (children) can be just as beautiful, meaning that my life is beautiful and complete because of my five children. Through each of them, I have learnt and grown to be a better mother.

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

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NURTURE Your child is turning 4 soon, and you already have a university in mind. Which pre-school will best help to accomplish this? Should you splurge or save? While the thought of your kid obtaining prodigy status is appealing, it is paramount to remember that there is no one-sizefits-all solution to guiding them through their crucial formative years.

According to American economist and Nobel laureate Professor James J. Heckman, “learning starts in infancy, long before formal education begins, and continues throughout life.”

Parents are increasingly embracing the significance of this statement as demands for quality pre-school education have skyrocketed world-wide over the years – so much so that many even go to the extent of charting their children’s academic futures, long before they are born.

Whether you might be a “kiasu” parent or not, here’s what to consider when picking your institution of choice.

Learning starts in infancy, lo before formal education be ng and continues throughou gins, t life.

Eeny, Meeny,

By Michelle Zhu

Miney,

Mo

Choosing a Preschool

Curriculum and Culture

Identifying your children’s needs and personalities along with the goals you’ve set with them, will greatly help you to discover the type of preschool you are searching for. If your toddler is already the book-loving, wellmannered tot that most parents aspire towards, perhaps you would like to concentrate on a more ‘holistic developmental’ approach. Others might require a higher level of discipline and supervision beyond your home, and this naturally calls for even more focused teacherchild interaction.

A school’s mission statement is very likely to reflect their organisational culture and educational philosophies.

Also, don’t forget to look into the nitty-gritty details such as classroom cleanliness, teacher turnover rate and lunch arrangements; even trivial impressions can be reflective of an institution’s performance and core values. When conducting research at the possible institution of your choice, it’s a good idea to observe 14

Family & Life • Sept 2013

the atmosphere during your visit: do the children and staff look happy, busy or bored? It is likely that the emotions and behaviour you detect from the school’s current inhabitants will largely influence that of your child.

If all else fails, word of mouth is your best bet. Find out what your family and friends, or even anonymous forum junkie parents, have to say about their own personal experiences.

Availability and Affordability

Parenting magazines and online articles targeting “kiasu” parents are always advising you to start registering your child for preschool at least a year or two in advance. If you’re looking at a “branded” institution for your toddler, do note that annual tuition fees can vary by the thousands according to location. Presently, if your child is a Singapore citizen, he or she already qualifies for an up to S$740 per month child care subsidy* from the Ministry of Community, Youth and Sports.

It is imperative to select a centre that not only fits comfortably within your budget (don’t forget to factor in school bus, lunch, excursion and entertainment fees, and so on.), but also one that is near your area of residence or workplace – think car pooling, play dates and the option of dropping off or picking your child up right before or after work. * Subsidy figures may vary according to your family’s monthly income, the child care programme duration and whether the mother is working or not. For more information on basic and additional child care subsidies which your child may qualify for, refer to ‘Parents – Financial Support’ at www.childcarelink.gov.sg

Teacher-Child Ratio

This subject is much-discussed among parents of today, with the inevitable conclusion that lower teacher-child ratios generally signify a higher quality of education and care.

MOE’s recommended guidelines would be a 25:1 ratio at the Kindergarten 2 level, which “branded” preschools significantly reduce on the basis that smaller learning groups allow for higher individual interaction between teacher and child, and reduces the time taken for students to respond and participate in classroom routines and lesson activities.

However, higher teacher-child ratios may not necessarily mean that your child is at a disadvantage – provided that the level of supervision is not compromised, less individual attention might also encourage independence and initiative among kids as they turn to rely on each other more heavily. The approach of giving one-onone focus is easily accomplished in small groups. But in classrooms where a teacher is able to manage and observe a large group of students while offering support and guidance whenever needed, a higher teacher-child ratio just might be the key to developing motivated, self-directed and independent learners.

Do Brands Spell ‘Best’?

It is certain that “branded” commercial preschools are more likely provide your child with more personalised attention with a lower child-to-teacher ratio; an internationally-recognized sui generis curriculum that stands out from the regular local education system; and appealing state-of-the-art facilities and campus environments that stand out from the infrastructure of most kindergartens in Singapore.

But who is to say that preschool centres catering to the masses are any less effective? What’s more important is to select a source of quality education within your means. Bear in mind that preschool is only the beginning of your child’s education, and its costs are likely to continue rising.

Perhaps what’s even more important is to impart a universal value that will almost guarantee success in life: a love for learning. A value that begins from the home, and when guided by the right attitudes and educational methodology, will work wonders for your child at every stage of life – academic or not.

NURTURE

Learning the

Language of

By Michelle Zhu

“If we were monolingual in our mother tongues, we would not make a living.

Becoming monolingual in English would have been a setback. We would have lost our cultural identity, that quiet confidence about ourselves and our place in the world.”

Lee Kuan Yew, 2000

Cover Illustration for Little Jay Writes an Adventure, available in all Popular outlets, selected local bookstores, and online at www.mandarinakids.com

As a homegrown Chinese Singaporean who attended a regular local primary and secondary school, I’m sure that there are many out there whose memories coincide with mine.

Daily xi zi (writing) homework, zuo wen (essays) and ting xie (tests) were just some of the aspects of Chinese lessons which my classmates and I dreaded most in our childhood years. I vaguely remember getting a lashing at home whenever I scored less than 70 per cent for the weekly tests in primary school, which gradually led me to master the art of ‘wandering eyes’: deftly stealing glances at my neighbor’s test paper without anyone ever noticing.

This was the only ‘skill’ which allowed me to advance from EM1 to the Higher Chinese Language stream when I went on to secondary school, which I eventually dropped right before my GCE ‘O’ levels in order to focus on other subjects. It was a massive load off my shoulders the day I graduated from junior college – the first joyful thought that came to mind was that I never had to fret over an upcoming ting xie in class again, or strain my eyes to peep at the adjacent table.

Today, I am barely able to decipher what’s on the front page of Lianhe Zaobao. Occasionally speaking basic, staggered Mandarin back at home with my Chinese-educated mother in a painfully-awkward manner, I often wonder how many out there were raised like me: forcefully trained in two languages, but a monolinguist at heart.

It is harrowing at times whenever I cross paths with a Mandarin-speaking friend, but I have yet to consider myself ‘handicapped’ because of my linguistic inability, and would shudder to think of ever having to sit through a Chinese lesson again.

Nearly five decades have passed since Singapore established itself as the leading supplier of multilingual citizens through the compulsory bilingual policy of its education system, otherwise known as the Mother Tongue Language (MTL). But how many who have been raised under this policy actually enjoyed learning to speak and write their mother tongue, or any other language?

Remember to have fun communicating with your child and treat the language like a ‘living thing’.

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

Introducing a second language to your child doesn’t always have to be a tedious and burdensome challenge. Young children have the advantage of starting off on a clean slate, so that in most instances, they are even unaware of themselves learning more than one language: they simply mimic what they hear and see during their formative years.

The key to making bilingualism (along with life’s lessons, academic or not) last is allowing the process to be a gratifying one. Another crucial aspect would be consistency; research suggests that children need to be exposed to the language for over 30% of their waking time to successfully

Fun

acquire fluent communication skills in the language. With the plethora of readily-available games, picture books and multimedia, I find it enviable that the children of our modern era are privileged enough to have the option of participating in newfangled educational methods to

make learning all the more exciting. So let’s not view bilingualism as a mere necessity borne for the sake of our economy.

If bilingual education is mandatory for your child, why not do it in the universal language of fun?

Leila Lim-Lodges is one mumtrepreneur who works towards making bilingualism an enjoyable experience, being a polyglot who grew up speaking Mandarin, German, English and Bahasa Melayu at home. She established MandarinaKids in 2010 with a goal to introduce Mandarin to beginners and children below the age of three, as well as to help parents build a bilingual environment at home.

The mother of two shares 10 simple tips to making the path to bilingualism a more entertaining and engaging one: 1 It is easier to establish a bilingual environment for your children through conversations, TV programs, play time and music.

2 Understand their learning style. If he or she is an interactive learner, an iPad with games would certainly be effective.

3 Create ‘relevant’ and engaging experiences to be shared, such as by practising role-play scenarios with them. One example would be pretending that you are a hawker seller, and getting your child to order food from you in the second language. Keep your conversations with them light-hearted so that they will develop a positive attitude towards these experiences.

4 Fix a daily activity that allows them to be exposed to the language, such as game sessions or even watching cartoons, and be consistent with it.

5 Always be enthusiastic about the learning process and participate in any activities that you think can benefit in their learning.

6 Try to segment the learning engagements by using a variety of tools that help to form vocabulary, phrases and eventually, sentences.

7 Join language play groups so that you are always with them during their learning years.

8 Never forget to praise and compliment them during every learning opportunity.

9 Remember to have fun communicating with your child and treat the language like a ‘living thing’ which you need to communicate with and ‘nurture’.

10 Most importantly, always trust in yourself. Learn with your child, and do not fear the language. Never refrain from trying just because you might sound ‘odd’ to them.

MandarinaKids produces a number of learning materials such as DVDs, toys and mobile apps for children to familiarize themselves with the Chinese language the fun way. The organization most recently launched its second bilingual picture book, Little Jay Writes an Adventure, which comes with interactive features such as flip-ups in the book and an accompanying audio CD.

Leila LimLodges, founder and CEO of MandarinaKids, an organization aiming to help parents who are keen to learn and teach their children Mandarin through creative and interactive methods.

More Than a Decade in Character Building

Call

65070 444

enquiries@cm-preschool.com

www.cm-preschool.com J o i n o u r f ac e b o o k g r o up p a r e nt s 4 c h a r ac te r

A Beautiful Transformation Counts Ang Mo Kio 161 Ang Mo Kio Ave 4

Punggol 420 Punggol Rd

Pasir Ris 146 Pasir Ris Rd (Franchise-Biz Available)

New

Yishun 2 Yishun Ind St 1 Northpoint BizHub

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Bishan 1 Pemimpin Dr One Pemimpin

NURTURE Aloysius Chow discusses how an addiction to online games could be just as ruinous as substance and alcohol abuse, and what you need to do to save your child from the gaming epidemic.

Nicol may seem like an average twelve-year-old logged on to the latest extension of his MMORPG (Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game) on his computer, with a Razor sticker overlooking him like a talisman.

His friends in South Korea, America and the Netherlands are planning for a “raid”, which is gamer’s lingo meaning a coordinated mission to defeat high-level enemies. Nicol and his gamer friends spend the next three hours on the raid.

To their delight, it is a success. “Great job, guys! We did it in record time. Gotta post dis on d forum,” exclaims Nicol.

He then bids farewell by informing his friends, “I gtg. Time 2 change 4 sch or teacher will own me.”

And Nicol logs off the computer at 6 am, much to the chagrin of his mother who has awoken to discover he has forgone a night’s sleep yet again to engage in a cyber fantasy world. “At least I’m not smoking cigarettes or drinking, right or not, Ma?” is what Nicol usually rebuts when either of his parents advises him not to spend too much time gaming on the computer.

But what Nicol claims may not be accurate. In 2009, a team of researchers used functional magnetic resonance imaging, a state of the art brain imaging method, to study the brains of people with online gaming addiction. When compared with a group of similar individuals who were not addicted to gaming, these researchers found that the active brain areas of online gaming addicts were significantly different, appearing similar to those of substance (or illicit drug) addicts.

..a new entry into the bible of psychiatry, suggesting that extreme conditions of gaming addiction may be almost as detrimental to an individual as the abuse of substances such as alcohol and cocaine.

G.A.M.E.S. Gaming

always Might Endanger some

By Aloysius Chow

This means that the addiction to online gaming is as strong as that of illicit substances, and has already led the academic and medical community at large to acknowledge the seriousness of online gaming addiction. In fact, a recent edition of the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) lists Internet Gaming Disorder as a new entry into the bible of psychiatry, suggesting that extreme conditions of gaming addiction may be almost as detrimental to an individual as the abuse of substances such as alcohol and cocaine.

Countries have also realised the potential serious consequences of online gaming addiction, and some have already started taking action. In China and South Korea, there are military-style boot camps for online gaming addicts and the latter has even considered controlling popular online games through legislation, like what they do for alcohol and drugs.

Is this just a panic created to ensure that online gaming addiction does not ensue?

Unfortunately not, according to statistics collated by companies which sell these games. It was recently reported that there was a drop in the number of subscribers to World of Warcraft (WoW), and the final number of subscribers was 8.3 million - a staggering number that exceeds the total current population of Singapore.

Now, before I seem like raising the alarm prematurely, it is true that not all of the 8.3 million subscribers of WoW would qualify as online gaming addicts. But even 1% of that number is a concern.

To drive this point further, these games are not like what we experienced in the early days of gaming, when Pac-Man and Street Fighter reigned. They call for careful planning and strategic thinking, which increases the value of the reward (ranging from online items from a ‘sabre’ to a ‘rock’). For the record, the number of people who actively play Candy Crush every day in the world is 14.7 million. In another report, it was claimed that game developers are now targeting children aged between 2 to 5 years old. This may not bode well if we do not put in place any safety nets to ensure that these children grow up without falling into the trap of game addiction.

Some common problems encountered by “hardcore” gaming students (i.e., those who spent between 18 to 37 hours a week gaming) were identified by researchers in a recent study conducted in Singapore. These common problems were: poorer academic grades, being less empathetic, and being more approving

18

Family & Life • Sept 2013

of aggressive behaviour, especially among boys.

How would you identify your child as a gaming addict, or may be turning into one? There are some signs which may seem similar to behaviour shown by the traditional drug addict: • Being distracted during non- gaming activities, such as studying, because your child is thinking of the game whilst being away from the computer • Displaying withdrawal symptoms such as irritable or aggressive behaviour • Doing everything possible to play the game, such as lying • Showing signs of tetchiness when advised to reduce the time spent on gaming, as exemplified by Nicol • A lack of interest in spending time with family members and friends, or even on previous favourite pastimes

If your child does exhibit any of these behaviours, do not panic. Here are some general suggestions to moderate your child’s gaming: • Set household rules and be firm about it. For example, allow your child to indulge in gaming as a reward only after all his/her schoolwork has been completed.

• Limit the time your child may spend on games, for example, an hour a day • Encourage interests and activities away from the computer (and television!).

It will be better if the hobby requires physical exercise.

• Create family time where technology is ‘left behind’ for a period of time, such as a trip overseas • Introduce casual games which encourage social interaction, such as board games or a multiplayer game on a console There’s really no cause for distress if your child plays the occasional online or mobile game, or might even seem “hooked”. A slogan used by the National Rifle Association of America, “Guns don’t kill people; people kill people.” is an apt quote for the rising culture of digital gaming. Games do not harm anyone. Only gamers can choose to harm themselves with obsession and poor time management.

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

19

NURTURE

Don’t You

Worry,

Child

Childhood should be a time of freedom, bliss, innocence and adventure.

Yet, the majority of schoolgoing children today, find themselves facing similar psychological and emotional threats of a modern adult lifestyle: daily anxiety, frustration and stress on levels that are overwhelming enough to wreak havoc on both body and mind.

We all need a little stress in our lives to give us that extra motivational push, but it doesn’t take rocket science to understand how excessive stress is the root of all evil.

Emotionally, it makes you miserable.

Physically, it adds to your belly fat, puts your heart at risk, and causes you to age faster. Mentally, it makes you less capable.

Adults are all too familiar with this inner demon, which is why it might come as a surprise for some that the very same consequences apply to children, too.

better informed are not only more accepting when told of a child’s mental health issues, they are also more alert to picking up symptoms of a mental health problem.”

Late last year, The Straits Times reported that calls to the Institute of Mental Health’s (IMH’s) hotline for schools in Singapore hit an all-time high of 8,336 in 2011: a whopping 27 times more than the 306 calls made in 2007. In the latter year, the REACH programme was established under the National Mental Health Blueprint to provide early identification, support and intervention for children and adolescents with emotional and behavior difficulties and related mental health problems in the primary and secondary schools and junior colleges. The number of students referred from schools to this programme also rose from 14 to 739 over the same period.

• Becoming more withdrawn

Ms Kelly Yeo, Senior Clinical Psychologist, REACH South Team, Department of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, Institute of Mental Health, explains these alarming rates, “A significant source of stress is academic pressure which may be fed by parental explanations, expectations in school and the children’s own expectations of their academic performance. Possibly because children are spending more time and school and on school-related work, there is generally less time for recreational activities which helps to relieve stress.”

..when these periods of low moods and/ or high anxiety are protracted, or symptoms are severe to the extent that a person can no longer participate as fully as before in his/her usual activities...

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

She goes on to highlight the impacts of such an affliction: “A high level of stress may predispose some children to develop mental health issues, such as anxiety or moodrelated problems. Sometimes, a particularly stressful period may be the trigger for an anxiety disorder or even major depressive disorder. Stress can also strain relationships at home, as children can become more moody or irritable when they are stressed.

Some children and teenagers may also avoid school when they perceive themselves as not able to cope with academic pressure.”

While neurodevelopmental disorders such as ADHD is one common problem which young school-going children are often present at mental health clinics for, Kelly also notes that that anxiety disorders are another common category of conditions that are cause for alarm among parents.

She says, “There is differing awareness of mental health issues for children in parents. Generally, parents who are

Kelly recommends that parents should be constantly on the alert for the following signs at home: • An abrupt change in temperament

• A loss of interest in activities he/she used to enjoy • Aggressiveness towards others • Constant emotional, depressed, moody, irritable or scared behavior • A loss of appetite • Anxiousness, restlessness, and an inability to sleep well • Refusal to attend school, or his/her school results plummet for no apparent reason • Expressions of abnormal and negative thoughts such as suicide If your children might be displaying one more or more of these symptoms, there’s no need to haul them down to a psychiatrist.

Kelly shares that since the mental health of youths primarily affect their academic performance, parents should first seek help through their children’s respective schools.

“Every mainstream school in Singapore now has at least one school counsellor. We work closely with school counsellors to encourage early identification of mental health issues in school-going children in order to provide early assessment and intervention,” she adds.

A balanced lifestyle of work and play, health diet, regular exercise, and a strong support network of family and friends who encourage positive thinking are what Kelly advocates to counteract the negative effects of stress on a child.

“Everyone experiences stress and can go through a period of low mood or high anxiety. Often, these stress-related symptoms disappear when circumstances change, or when the person finds more effective ways of coping with them,” Kelly states. “However, when these periods of low moods and/or high anxiety are protracted, or symptoms are severe to the extent that a person can no longer participate as fully as before in his/her usual activities, then it is wise decision to seek help early.”

Five Toxic Effects of Stress on Children 1. Your child’s brain development is at stake.

The brain’s circuits are most vulnerable in early childhood, and their development may be hindered greatly by stress. In extreme cases, this will result in a smaller-thanusual brain size in young children and lower IQ. 2. Stress does not just come from academic pressure.

Conditions caused by parental neglect, violence and emotional abuse are also major sources of long-term stress among children.

3. Just as in adults, stress will lower your child’s immune system.

Cortisol, released in the body as a result of stress, will lower your child’s immune system significantly and leave their developing bodies vulnerable to illnesses.

4. Children tend to be more susceptible to prolonged periods of stress.

Because children have yet to develop emotional resilience and the ability to practice fully rational thinking, they have a tendency to experience stress for a longer period of time, without a sufficiently reliable support system of adults.

5. Stress is contagious.

In a 2010 study conducted by the American Psychological Association, 91% of children surveyed revealed they know when their parents are stressed out and feel “sad, worried and frustrated” as a result. One-third of them also reported stress-related symptoms including trouble sleeping, headaches or upset stomachs.

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

21

NURTURE hospital routines to facilitate roomingin. This is in keeping with NUH’s Breastfeeding policy, which adheres to the BFHI’s 10 Steps to Successful breastfeeding. * “Breastfeeding For You and Your Baby” by the NUH BFHI Steering Committee Jan 2013, available in English, Mandarin, Malay.

Up

Close Personal

&

Having finally gone through grueling hours of labour, the first thing on your mind should be a well-deserved rest. Would you rather have your newborn whisked away and recuperate in solitude, or remain together as close as two peas in a pod? It’s a personal decision, really.

You’ve been obsessing and fussing over the life in your womb for nine months, and now that’s finally come to an end.

But the challenges of motherhood are far from over: postpartum weight loss woes, getting back on track at home and in the office, and most importantly, caring for your brand-new baby. The typical boyfriend/husband approach by declaring a need for “space” and “time” seems a tempting option to take before you return from the hospital with your bundle of joy. Yet, like every other relationship, taking it long-distance with your newborn is a big decision. Even if it’s within the same hospital building, a few floors or walls away.

The practice of rooming-in – an arrangement where a newborn is kept with the mother instead of in a nursery – can nurture both mother and child in more ways than one. While breastfeeding is more easily induced through observation of feeding cues, it is also an opportunity for your newborn to recognise you and at the same time, cry less as you learn how to better take care of your baby.

The general philosophy of roomingin care as opposed to nurserybased care emphasises that each motherbaby pair is unique...

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

Rooming-in is just one of the “10 Steps to Successful Breastfeeding” as part of the Baby-Friendly Hospital Initiative (BFHI), a world-wide programme developed by UNICEF and World Health Organization (WHO). Ever since its launch in 1991, BFHI guidelines and policies have spread like wildfire around the world, with a vision to “ensure that all maternities, whether free-standing or in a hospital, become centres of breastfeeding support”.

Over 15,000 facilities in 134 countries have been awarded the “Baby-Friendly status” by UNICEF and WHO today, with five maternity hospitals (Singapore General Hospital, National University Hospital, KK Women’s & Children’s Hospital, Mount Alvernia Hospital and Thomson Medical Centre) having recently implemented the BFHI’s guidelines in early 2012.

Dr Yvonne Ng, a Consultant, Department of Neonatology, National University

Hospital, is an active champion of the BFHI. She lets Family & Life in on the importance of keeping close to your baby after birth.

What are the benefits of immediate skin-to-skin care?

Early skin-to-skin contact has a “calming effect” that stabilises baby’s heart rate and breathing, and warms baby naturally.

It also calms the mother, reduces uterine bleeding, and facilitates the first breastfeed. A mother who has had this experience would attest to this subjective “calming” effect.

In a metanalyses* which included 13 trials with 702 baby-mother pairs, mothers with early skin-to-skin contact with their babies, were more likely to breastfeed in the first one to four months, and tended to breastfeed longer. Babies interacted more with their mothers, and cried less than babies receiving regular hospital care in the nursery. *Moore ER, Anderson GC, Bergman N, Dowswell T. Early skin-to-skin contact for mothers and their healthy newborn infants. Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews 2012

One of BFHI’s “10 Steps to Successful Breastfeeding” is rooming-in – would you say that the NUH staff’s efforts in implementing this particular step have been fruitful?

I am happy with our progress. We concentrated on creating antenatal awareness* of rooming-in so that parents “buy-in” to this concept, and modified

What do Baby-Friendly Hospitals like NUH do in order to reassure mothers who might worry about not having enough rest while rooming-in?

We encourage rooming-in, so mothers (and fathers) can get accustomed to their baby’s feeding patterns and behavior.

Nursing and medical staff will provide appropriate advice and assistance for these initial few days.

The general philosophy of rooming-in care as opposed to nursery-based care emphasises that each mother-baby pair is unique, such that newborn care is provided in a more flexible, individualised manner. Both parents can interact with and cuddle their newborn as much as they wish to. The mother naturally will spend more time in skin-to-skin contact with her baby while she is breastfeeding.

Besides the fact that rooming-in facilitates breast feeding, what other benefits are there from this practice?

Unnecessary separation of mother and baby may disrupt early mother and baby interactions. Newborns rooming-in will receive more attention compared to the usual nursery arrangement, resulting in less crying and few periods of prolonged crying.

Unnecessary separation of mother and baby may disrupt early mother and baby interactions.

Newborns rooming in will receive more attention compared to the usual nursery arrangement...

A 70-year old article from a paediatric journal eloquently states the benefits of rooming-in at St Louis Maternity from 1946 to1950: 1. Fostering, from the beginning, a warm, permissive mother-child relationship 2. Providing a flexible feeding and sleeping routine suited to the needs of the individual infant 3. Giving the mother genuine practice in “mothercraft” so that she leaves the hospital confident and assured 4. Encouraging successful breastfeeding How true these tenets still are today!

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

23

HEALTH

Baby, You’ve

e Chan d Me

By Dr Christopher Ng

A woman’s body undergoes tremendous transformations during and after pregnancy.

As soon as your baby is out, your body begins its physical healing process in a bid to restore itself to its prepregnancy state. Don’t be alarmed if you experience some or even most of the following symptoms after giving birth.

Following delivery, the womb continues to contract back to its original size, and these

It is important to reduce the risk of infection as a wound which does not heal properly can lead to scarring.

Washing your nether regions on a daily basis, especially after using the toilet and while you are bathing, is recommended. It is good to use specially-formulated feminine wash to keep that area clean while changing your sanitary pads regularly. Ice packs can help to reduce swelling, and sitting on padded rings and soft pillows can help to ease some of the discomfort. stops. Occasional passing out of blood clots is normal, as the womb contracts and more frequent changing of sanitary pads instead of using tampons is advisable so as to reduce the risk of infections. Take note of and see your gynaecologist for any excessive bleeding, fever or foul-smelling discharge that you might have.

Urinary Discomfort

Some women may experience temporary urinary stress incontinence especially whenever they laugh, cough or sneeze after a vaginal delivery. This is a result of overstretching of the connective tissues around the bladder base and nerves – it tends to resolve spontaneously as the tissues contract and heal. This process can be helped further with Kegel exercises which are designed to strengthen the pelvic floor muscles, increase vaginal tone and to restore the bladder support.

Swelling and bruising around the bladder area can also cause difficulty passing urine, which is made worse with the fear of pain during urination. This should recover with time. It is important to see your gynaecologist if this does not improve, or if there is fever or burning pain during urination.

Piles and Bowel Problems

Family & Life • Sept 2013

Contractions

This is common for women who have gone through a vaginal delivery. Some resulting tears and episiotomies in the vaginal area can be significantly larger than others, and these will therefore be accompanied with more discomfort while taking a longer time to heal.

Many women have vaginal discharge called lochia after delivery, and this can even last for up to 6 weeks post delivery.

It usually starts off as bright red discharge before changing to a brownish colour, and finally white as the bleeding

24

Difficult and traumatic vaginal deliveries can damage pelvic floor muscles and the anal sphincter, which in turn leads to faecal incontinence. Kegel exercises are helpful, but if the problem still persists after several months, a gynaecological assessment is advisable.

Discomfort and Swelling

Lochia

Post natal blues affect up to 50% of women...

be taken to shrink the haemorrhoids.

In addition to this, stool softeners and increasing dietary fibre intake (fruits, vegetables and whole grains) may help to make it easier to pass motion.

Piles (haemorrhoids) are abnormal swelling of the veins around the anus, and this can be exacerbated during pregnancy or after vaginal delivery. Because of the fear of hurting their perineum or aggravating the painful haemorrhoids or episiotomy wound, some women will avoid emptying their bowels regularly, and this can lead to chronic constipation.

Topical creams or oral medication can

contractions can be felt for several weeks.

This process is induced by breast feeding and is necessary for your body to return to its original size as well as for reducing the bleeding, but it can occasionally be very painful.

Oral analgesics are often sufficient to relieve pain. Women should see their gynaecologist if there is excessive pain accompanied with fever, as this could indicate a uterine infection, which requires urgent treatment with antibiotics.

Breast Discomfort

This is the period when breast engorgement occurs, leaving your breasts feeling full, swollen and tender. Regular expression and the use of a breast pump can relieve this. Nipple shields are useful if the nipples are sore and cracked.

Any signs of mastitis (fever along with painful, swollen, warm breasts) warrant a gynaecological review and an ultrasound scan in order to exclude a breast abscess. Antibiotics should be started early and breast milk from the affected side should be discarded. Cold cabbage applied over the breast can relieve some of the discomfort. In severe cases, surgical drainage of the abscess is needed.

Supportive bras will also help.

Weight Loss

Most women fear that they will not be able to lose the weight they have put on during pregnancy.

The good news is that you should lose about 5 kg immediately after birth, which accounts for the baby, placenta and amniotic fluid. With breast feeding, a healthy well-balanced diet and regular exercise (which can start after 4 to 6

weeks of giving birth), most women will be able to shed the rest of the excess fat and weight.

If all else fails, there are lots of noninvasive aesthetic treatments which can be taken into consideration.

Stretch Marks, Pigmentation and Hair Loss

Stretch marks are notoriously difficult to get rid of completely, but some aesthetic treatments can improve their appearance. The marks will tend to eventually change from red to white over time. It is better

to try and prevent stretch marks from occurring with the use of stretch mark creams during pregnancy instead.

Likewise, the line down the middle of the abdomen (linea nigra) will also fade over time.

Hair loss is a common problem that affects many women after delivery, and this is the result of declining hormone levels. Usually peaking three to four months after delivery, hair loss tends to be temporary for most women and the application of medicated serums and shampoos can help treat this and restore hair growth. Hair growth usually returns to normal in six to 12 months.

Sex Life and Mood Changes Although many women are able to resume sexual activity after 6 weeks of giving birth, there is no set time frame to

predict when you will start feeling ‘in the mood’ again. A new mother’s libido tends to suffer due to sleepless nights, exhausting days, dirty diapers and a baby with endless needs. There is also a general fear of intercourse being painful or resulting in internal damage.

Most women fear that they will not be able to lose the weight they have put on during pregnancy.

The good news is that you should lose about 5 kg immediately.

Post natal blues affect up to 50% of women and comprises low moods, anxiety, restlessness, tearfulness and fatigue. They tend to be resolved after one to two weeks from delivery. Take light exercise, find time to rest, and get help with caring for your baby. If these symptoms have not improved after 2 weeks, you should be assessed for postnatal depression.

Dr Christopher Ng Obstetrician, Gynaecologist MBBS (London, UK), FRANZCOG (Aust-NZ) MMed (O&G) (S’pore), FAMS (O&G) (S’pore) GynaeMD Women’s & Rejuvenation Clinic www.gynaemd.com.sg

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Sept 2013 • Family & Life

25

HEALTH Babies cry a lot. But, if your little one cries a little too often, he or she might just be suffering from infantile colic.

Associate Professor Marion Aw reveals to Family & Life how you can be absolutely sure, and the ways to treat it.

It’s not uncommon for newborns to cry.

Crying is their only language, after all – a shrill and automatic signal, a biological response to communicate their needs. It could be because they’re hungry, tired, need cuddling, or are suffering discomfort from a dirty diaper. But when the crying seems almost impossible to soothe and instead, becomes more intense over time with each session lasting much longer than the ‘normal’ two hours per day, you might just be facing every parent’s nightmare: infantile colic.

In a survey commissioned by Abbott in March 2013 to better understand the prevalence of infant feeding intolerance issues, it is revealed that colic is the most stress-causing symptom for parents, although it is fairly common among infants. Infantile colic is often a sign as a possible gastrointestinal (GI) symptom, alongside other symptoms such as spitting up and regurgitation, gassiness, constipation, vomiting and diarrhoea.

Little do most parents know that GI symptoms might not always be the cause of the incessant crying.

Associate Professor Marion Aw, Senior Consultant, Division of Paediatric Gastroenterology and Hepatology, National University Hospital, reveals the answers to some of the mysteries that surround the frustrating C-word.

What is baby colic?

Infantile colic refers to a collection of symptoms experienced by young babies (as opposed to a medical condition or disease per se). These include fussiness, crying, and irritability in a baby who is otherwise well. Almost all babies experience infantile

Almost all babies experience infantile colic at some point.

It typically begins in the first 1-2 months of life. This crying...

can be quite distressing for first-time parents.

In a broad sense, it is similar.

However, baby colic or infantile colic is presumed to be colic (cramps) arising from the infant’s intestines. colic at some point. It typically begins in the first 1-2 months of life.

This crying and fussiness can be quite distressing, particularly for first time parents. Whilst the majority of babies with infantile colic are medically well, there may be a few where there are underlying medical conditions resulting in the crying and irritability. If parents are in doubt, it would be safer to check with their doctor.

Is it different from abdominal colic?

In a broad sense, it is similar. However, baby colic or infantile colic is presumed to be colic (cramps) arising from the infant’s intestines. Abdominal colic, which in the majority of cases usually refers to cramps from the intestines, can also result from other organs such as the gall bladder (biliary colic) or ureters (pipes that connect the kidneys to the urinary bladder).

Is colic a sure sign that my child is suffering from GI symptoms?

No, it is not. Whilst the exact cause of infantile colic is not known, the postulated causes include excessive intestinal air, gut dysmotility, or the infant’s immature ability to modulate reactions to internal or external stimuli.

However, if you have any concerns as a parent, it would be safer to get a proper check-up from a doctor.

Hush Now,

Don’t You

Cry

For how long would colic affect my baby?

Colic usually gets better by 4-5 months of age. It would be usual for the typical “infantile colic” to persist beyond 6 months of age. If these symptoms persist (crying, fussing, irritability), then it may be important to look for and exclude other causes that may result in similar symptoms.

It seems that crying, vomiting and spitting up is perfectly normal for infants.

How can I tell if these symptoms are truly a cause for alarm?

Almost all babies experience GI symptoms, hence, they are “normal” in that sense.

However, the degree to which each baby experiences the symptoms may vary; some babies tend to appear to suffer more from these symptoms compared to others.

Those who have significant symptoms may have an underlying medical problem and parents should seek medical attention.

For example, a baby who regurgitates (vomits) milk several times per day after feeding but is otherwise feeding well, putting on weight, sleeping well and happy in interactions, is a normal baby. In this instance, parents don’t need to worry about the regurgitation.

However, if the baby regurgitates, fusses, cries, refuses feeding and becomes difficult to settle, these would be causes for concern.

Other symptoms that would be cause for concern include: • Vomiting that has an unusual colour (green vomitus, blood in the vomit) • Poor weight gain • Blood in the infant’s stool Are there any safe home remedies that you would recommend to soothe my crying baby?

You may try the 5 “S” approach: 1 Safe swaddling.

2 Side or stomach sleeping — whilst sleeping on the back is the only safe position for babies to sleep, it may not be the best position to calm a crying or fussing infant. Putting baby to sleep on his side may be an option. If it is for a short nap with someone watching, then stomach sleeping may be helpful.

3 “Shh” sound — making a “shh” sound near the baby’s ear.

4 Swinging the baby (carefully) with gentle jiggling movements.

5 Sucking has a calming effect on babies — allow your baby to suck on the breast, finger or pacifier.

Other things that have been tried and found useful may include putting baby in a car seat placed on a washing machine whilst it is washing a load, or going for a car ride.

Could breastfeeding instead of using milk formula prevent my child from suffering GI symptoms?

Breast-feeding is always best for babies.

Babies easily digest breast milk, and breastfed babies have a lower chance of getting GI symptoms such as constipation.

What can I do to cope with the stress of having a colicky baby?

Looking after a young baby can be very stressful, particularly if the baby is colicky.

It would be important to have help from another person such as your spouse, family member or helper.

In fact, studies have shown that crying in colicky babies reduces if mothers have a one-hour “baby-free” time each day.

26

Family & Life • Sept 2013

July 2013 • Family & Life

27

HEALTH

O

Weighed Down

by

Childhood obesity is an increasingly common health problem among school children in Singapore. As society becomes more affluent, there is increased intake of dietary fat due to a variety of ready-available food options. Compounded by the fact that children today are leading sedentary lifestyles, it isn’t any wonder that they are unable to get rid of the excess calories.

besity?

By Dr Cindy Ho

Childhood obesity is an increasingly common health problem among school children in Singapore. As society becomes more affluent, there is increased intake of dietary fat due to a variety of readyavailable food options. Compounded by the fact that children participate more in sedentary activities such as computer games, handheld games and TV viewing, it isn’t any wonder that they are unable to get rid of the excess calories.

A Health Promotion Board (HPB) Survey showed that 60% of adult Singaporeans eat out as often as 4 times a week and it is likely that their children willeat out with their families. With more income and F&B establishments at every turn, Singaporeans are beginning to increase their food intake in portions, but less healthily.

The same survey also showed that one in four children aged 7-12 years ate fruit and vegetables daily. It is very important to make dietary changes in tackling obesity.

Other lifestyle measures such as engaging in physical activities are imporant as well.

Obesity in childhood leads to about 30 percent of obesity in adulthood and is linked to problems including high blood pressure, high cholesterol levels, type-2 diabetes and an increased risk of heart disease. Often, it also affects the psychological well-being of children, as they may get teased or bullied in school for being obese. It is therefore very important to practice early assessment and intervention before this condition worsens in adulthood.

If your child is overweight, here’s what you need to do to manage it:

1

Be Supportive

Overweight children need support, acceptance and encouragement from their parents. They need to understand the reasons behind all the concern and to have a chance to share their concerns with you.

2

Teach, Lead and Include

Do not isolate your overweight child but get everyone in the family involved in eating healthily and changing their lifestyle to include more physical activity. Family involvement helps teach everyone good, healthy habits and does not single out the overweight child.

Children are good learners and they learn best by example. Being a good role model for your children by living out a healthy lifestyle will teach them habits to follow them through the rest of their lives.

3

Loosen the Diet Reins

Do not put your child on a restrictive diet. Limiting what children eat may be harmful to their health and interfere with their growth and development. Parents should offer the whole family a wide variety of food from different food groups.

Snacks should be as nutritious as possible, without depriving your child of the occasional chocolate or chips. Also, remember to buy lots of different types of wholesome food for your home. This will help your children learn how to make healthy food choices.

4

Let Go of Food as a Reward

Sending children to bed without dinner will make them worry that they will go hungry. They would then eat whenever they get a chance ‘in case’ they get punished later.

Rewarding them with treats will also cause them to perceive that such foods are more valuable. This will send the wrong message about food that are ‘freely available’ such as rice, fish, fruits and vegetables.

5

Go Shopping

Grocery shopping together gives you a chance to teach your children about good nutrition. It also helps you to learn their food

preferences. Children get a feeling of accomplishment and may be more willing to try food they helped shop for and prepare.

6

Concentrate on Meals

Eating in front of the TV makes it difficult to pay attention to feelings of fullness, and may lead to binging. When the children eat slowly, they also can detect fullness better and stop before overeating.

7

Take Part in Lunch Recess

Because your children’s lunch options are often limited to the school canteen during recess time, find out what is available at the canteen stalls and advise your child to make proper food choices from there.

Packed meals from home are also a more heartwarming and nutritious alternative, as you will get to decide what goes into your child’s lunchbox.

8

Play Along

Encourage your child to ditch the television or computer to get out and play outdoors instead.

Toys such as water guns, scooters and limbo party games are some examples which will encourage physical activity. Get active yourself by playing along! It’s great fun and does wonders for everyone’s health.

If you find all measures taken on your own doesn’t seem to work, it may be worthwhile getting a doctor’s consultation to make sure there’s no pathological problem causing the rapid gain in weight.

See a dietician for more detailed meal plans to reduce caloric intake, or even work with a physiotherapist to come up with an appropriate exercise regimen to follow.

Dr Cindy Ho Associate Consultant Division of Paediatric Endocrinology, National University Hospital

Obesity in childhood leads to approximately 30 percent of obesity in adulthood and is linked to problems including high blood pressure...

28

Family & Life • Sept 2013

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

29

relax If observing the monkeys inspires you to take a relaxing soak in the water as well, Shibu Onsen and Yudanaka Onsen are two nearby hot spring town attractions which cater to human enjoyment.

By Michelle Zhu

UNLEASH THE

beast!

Jogokudani Monkey Park 6845, Hirao Yamanouchi, Shimotakai District, Nagano Prefecture 381-0400, Japan Admission: 500 yen (adult), 250 yen (child) Open: 8am – 5pm (Summer season) / 9am – 4pm (Winter season) Website: http://www.jigokudani-yaenkoen.co.jp

Thirst for Knowledge: Living Desert Zoo & Gardens in California, United States

This native wildlife zoo takes pride in the preservation, conservation and interpretation of desert landscapes and species from around the world. Trek through and climb desert ridges on the hiking trail, or opt for the guided open-air tram. Boasting an impressive range of animal and plant species from North America and Africa, the zoo also offers a plethora of educational activities for families and children aged 4 – 14, such as the Jr. Keeper Program, Gecko / Raven Explorers, and even the overnight experience of sleeping under the stars (Starry Safari).

In the process of fuelling your child’s fascination with the universe and everything contained in it, creating opportunities for encountering wildlife species in their natural habitats will in turn encourage and develop your child’s love and respect for Mother Nature.

Travelling isn’t just a time for fun and family bonding, but an opportunity for educational enrichment, too. It’s time to start planning for your next holiday’s ‘lesson’. Ditch those animal flashcards and get ready to soak up some amazing wildlife experiences, while going ga-ga together over the cutest creatures to be found beyond our concrete jungle of Singapore.

Here are our top picks for the top five wildlife attractions around the world.

Big (Koala) Bear Hugs: Koala Park Sanctuary in NSW, Australia

Don’t come here expecting glitz and glamour, but if your life-long dream is to embrace the wonders of nature in a literal sense, this is probably as close as you’ll get. The Koala Park Sanctuary is an open-concept, unassuming haven built for koalas to live and breed safely under protection against the dangers of fur-hunting. These cuddly bear-like marsupials enjoy relative freedom as they roam about in ten-acre Eucalyptus woodlands, as opposed to being held captive in the local zoo.

Other native Australian animals such as echidnas and wedge-tailed eagles also reside at the sanctuary. Hand-feed kangaroos, pet dingos and of course, snuggle up to and snap pictures with the koalas at any time.

Fairy penguin/wombat shows and even sheep-shearing activities are available at intervals throughout the day.

For just £35 (inclusive of admission), you’ll get your own personal llama to walk through the forest for an hour – an unusual delight well-suited for adults and teenagers above 14 years of age.

Ashdown Forest Llama Park Wych Cross, Forest Row, East Sussex (RH18 5JN) Admission: Refer to website for seasonal admission prices Open: 9am – 5pm daily.

Closed on Christmas, Boxing and New Years day.

Website: www.llamapark.co.uk

Bath & Monkey Business: Jogokudani Monkey Park in Yamanouchi, Japan

Koala Park Sanctuary 84 Castle Hill Road, West Pennant Hills, New South Wales 2125, Australia Admission: AUD $26 (adult) and $15 (children aged 4 – 14) Open: 9am – 5pm daily. Closed on Christmas day.

Email: info@koalaparksancturary.com.au

Llama Love: Ashdown Forest Llama Park in East Sussex, U.K.

Nestled in the home of Winnie the Pooh just 40 miles from London, you might not find Pooh Bear or Christopher Robin at the Ashdown Forest Llama Park (there are rustic Pooh-themed playhouses in the woods, though) – but it’s a magical and memorable experience all the same with nearly 100 llamas, alpacas and reindeer amidst vast, undulating plains. These curious camelid species are rarely found in the wild or at local zoos, and are mild-mannered, lovable creatures that your children might badger you to buy as pets.

30

Family & Life • Sept 2013

For your viewing and photo-taking pleasure, snow monkeys (Japanese macaques) are treated to onsen (hot spring) spas at the Jogokudani Monkey Park, free-ofcharge. The best time to visit the park would be in winter, from January to February – due to the likelihood of heavy snow and higher instances of monkeys being drawn to the hot springs to keep warm from the cold – although the macaques can be spotted at the Park all year round.

Those looking to beat the heat should note that this attraction is best visited first thing in the morning – else, sunscreen and large-brimmed hats are highly recommended.

Living Desert Zoo & Gardens 47-900 Portola Ave., Palm Desert, CA 92260 Admission: USD $17.25 (general admission), $8.75 (children ages 3 – 12). Free admission for children under the age of 3.

Open: 9am – 5pm daily from October 1 to May 31 Website: www.livingdesert.org

Tiny Terrain, Big Adventure: Penang National Park in Penang, Malaysia

Occupying only around 10 square miles, Malaysia’s smallest and youngest national park is tucked away in the corner of Penang Island and brimming with camping, trekking, swimming and hiking activities for your young ones. Along your travels, you may be lucky enough to come across enchanting animals such as leopard cats along with a rich variety of reptiles, insects and flora. Popular hiking destinations include Long Turtle Beach with a mesmerizing beach view and also being a hot nesting spot for sea turtles (only to be spotted in the evenings if you plan to camp overnight, with nesting months from April – February) and the Muka Head Light House, which was built 130 years ago.

Although entry to the park is free, do note that access to the canopy walkway is chargeable (RM5 for adults and RM3 for children) and return boat rides are to be paid for prior to your journey.

Penang National Park Jalan Hassan Abbas, 11050 Penang, Malaysia Admission: Free Open: 8am – 6pm daily Website: www.wildlife.gov.my

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family and life fa.indd 1

27/8/2013 12:24:0231 PM Sept 2013 • Family & Life

relax Value hunters might be familiar with the euphoria of victory gained from a no-spend challenge, but there are other priceless accomplishments to bag home by simply saying, “No”.

Just say

By Michelle Zhu

With the introduction of children come greater financial commitments and responsibilities. And it’s not encouraging that housing and car loans, insurance premiums and your dependant child’s 101 buying needs make retirement seem like a faraway dream. Don’t sigh in resignation because you think it can’t be helped: like many others, you might be a victim of spending habits you never knew you had yourself.

No-spend challenges have recently been popularized as part of New Year resolutions all over the world, and are just one of the many ways to gain insight into your current personal finances, and what changes can be made. For those who might not heard of this game, the challenger will commit oneself to a set of typical no-spend rules, along the lines of: 1. Spending only home essentials such as groceries, but not objects which would clutter up the home 2. Spending on necessities such as bills, rental, groceries and food, which is allowed, but on a budget

‘NØ’ 3. Setting a S$20 “weekly experience” budget for enjoyable but non-essential activities such as having dinner out with friends.

NO Sodaudy conducted by the Heaaltt han

A 2012 st howed th d (H P B ) s r a o y s c h o o ls B n io secondar in Promot s t n e d u gary 0% of st onsume su c d e a la r m in g 4 y e v r su PB study, r c o ll e g e s another H a n d ju n io In . is s a b a d a il y ents and drunks on 8% of par 2 t a h t d ren, aged e a le h e ir c h il d it w a s r e v t e v a g d e r in k s s survey , sugary d ld o s c a r e g iv e r r a e y e o u r s e lf t o o u r t o n in h a ll e n g e y between f C . k e e w sweet once a uests for q e r more than ’s d il h to your c water n o t r e le n t d choose n a , n u r g t h e lo n r s o n ju n k d r in k s in f e w d o ll a a e v a s l ’l g in g a ou e encoura in s t e a d . Y il h w s e g a bever li f e s t y le . h e a lt h ie r

4. Any leftover money from the weekly experience budget will go straight into savings.

It’s the ideal, exciting and beneficial game of finances: by invading your lifestyle and compelling you to consider other cost-free options of entertainment, it also encourages planning ahead.

Every time you find yourself thinking of making throwaway purchases such as going to the movies or snapping up a bottled drink from the convenience store, you’d think twice about breaking your no-spend set of rules. You have everything to gain, and nothing to lose.

But with mouths to feed and in a city where S$20 can be easily spent in a single purchase, how practical might this arrangement be? This also means giving up romantic dinner dates out with the wife or hubby; missing out on great deals which last for a limited period of time; and isolating yourself from your existing circle of friends. Breaking free from a no-spend challenge might even backfire in the long run: you’ve missed the thrill of spending so much that you’ve planned a massive shopping spree for the moment your challenge is over.

Rather than rejecting the idea of spending altogether or saying ‘no to an over-populated Singapore’, there are several other less drastic measures you can take to say ‘No’ for a cause. Family & Life invites you to take up the following series of more practical challenges for a month or longer if you can.

rtainment of things NO Paid Ente t exhaustible lis

There is an in t having gether withou to o d ill st n you ca tseeing at ur wallet: sigh yo t ou ip h w to cooked e Bay, a hometh by s en d ar G endless linepicnic, and an hibitions Whi up of free ex le th . DVD or at cred and concerts it ca heaven days in the -sen rd s live console-game t pla eem with n home s im stic out, swip rt of your ow fo m p co o r s ing efra sible awa appealing inin how to y wi e some other ar g f quic r ll ma om allenge kly y The ke y When the ch s. on ti op our ‘No cash ou real Plas yourself mea ise er, you’ll find tic’ c ov ns t is a n cha each dep s which say llen lete rning toward ce ing is d no t e or g m . e als your o pl ent you’d not o chil asti of entertainm save s rm c fo d r bags en t mon but o : th on. ey o it’s is m rather spend n m a lar uch ight save ge s mor the cale e envi of y , ronm worthw our h chil e ile t nt f dren o or t ’s fu ture he sake .

lothens g out the old)have too C w e N NO out cleari woman can’t hes clot (with s a i d t h a t a of our once

NO Pla

ver orn Many Whoe eing w , lied. b s r red e e h t t f clo clutte ut a a o f n many o w ro lprits get th y new the cu e often r a not bu d o n t a f l , ren ce rse r child or twi u ge you o n y e l l r a ready r fo Ch you al self o r t home. u a o h y w s for aring o e s n ’t clothe tion d ry. We a a t s s o e r c ne l i c e ’s e in on po rdrob i unless a h s w a r f n you n the ays to have i less w d up o t n n e u l o ’l our ec you form y ere ar s mean h n t a r – t e r d list do som thes o o u l o c wante y h f i l c d ppare d mat es. An find a mix an t essori s c u j c a t ith which u migh look w loset ng, yo c i n e a h e t l c ck of ut. spring the ba en abo t o t t o g d r pushe tely fo omple c e ’v you

stic

NO Tobacco

Save money, your children, and yourself just by giving up sm oking.

According to the Tobacco Singapore web -Free site, 7 Singapo reans die each from smoking day ; second-han d smoke kills 600,000 peopl o ve r e worldwide each year, ou which about t of 165,000 are ch ildren. With of a pack of the price smokes averag ing to about we’re already $1 2, living in one of the most places to ligh ex pe nsive t up – imagin e the hundre regular smoke d s a r would save a month just quitting. Try b y this challeng e out for just 6 mo nths and you ’ll know how much more fa bulous the re su lts will be if you keep it up for life.

Tell us how the Family & Life ‘No’ Challenge worked out for you. Share your experiences by writing to editorial@familyandlife.sg with the subject header: I Said No, and you might win a prize!

32

Family & Life • Sept 2013

We are located at : Blk 5014 Ang Mo Kio Ave 5 #06-01. Techplace 2 Singapore 569881 Tel : +65 6515 2988 | email : info@mccoy.com.sg | Web : www.mccoy.com.sg

Sept 2013 • Family & Life 33 *While Stocks Last

relax A CEO of a reputed organisation once said he had been working more than 90 to 100 hours a week for many years, and jokingly added that he should have done more. We’ve also heard of numerous organisations dishing out cash rewards and appreciation certificates for employees not taking a single day of leave for a minimum of three years. In yet another case, a jet-setting CEO was proudly patting his own back, stating that he loved his work so much that he often did not see his wife or children for several weeks, and that he was unable to remember when was the last time he took a couple of days off to be on vacation.

It seems that such cases are increasing at an exponential rate. You can very easily spot such people constantly talking on their mobile phones, checking their hand held devices for text messages, or always checking their laptops for never-ending emails, and so on. Such people have their hands and minds occupied with projects, countless unfinished tasks, endless meetings and emails, while believing they are setting the benchmark as role models to others.

In a global study conducted by Accenture titled “Defining Success” in March 2013, more than 53% of business executives surveyed around the world declared themselves as workaholics. These people might believe they are expressing “devotion” to “going the extra mile” for the organisations they belong to, but in fact, such habits are nothing to be proud of. Workaholics are always driven by deep internal needs, rather than external ones, and do not realise the difference between being a workaholic and working hard.

If you’re a workaholic, here’s why you should be ashamed of yourself:

1. Delusions of Efficiency – Super workaholics are not necessarily the most efficient people, even if they stubbornly work 18 hours a day. In fact, they just might just turn out to be the least efficient of them all. They may appear to be working, but internally their brains would have switched off. The ideas they generate when the brain and essential body systems turn off, is a result of frustration and lethargy from long hours of contemplating, and is hardly sustainable.

2. Far From Perfect – Workaholics often believe themselves to be perfectionists and role models, and often the media also portrays them as such. But in reality they are neither perfectionists, nor can be role models to anyone sensible and knowledgeable about the hazards of overwork. They may have plenty of hollow followers who are as insane as themselves, but no sensible person will agree or appreciate this kind of burnout.

Get a

Life 7 Reasons Why Workaholics Have Nothing to be Proud of 34

Family & Life • Sept 2013

Workaholics often believe themselves to be perfectionists and role models, and often the media also portrays them as such. But in reality they are neither perfectionists, nor can be role models...

3. Personality Disorders – High

workaholics suffer from a disease called Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and an inability to let go. Most of them also struggle with what we call the indispensability syndrome, an obsession to constantly prove something “great” every minute of the day. They cannot bear the thought of being “left out”, and always want to be involved in everything. They are terrified of being not kept in the loop, and are unable to delegate. And they believe nothing can work if they are not involved.

4. Addiction to Appreciation –

Excessive workaholics are appreciationseeking addicts with an insatiable craving for recognition. They are likely to suffer from a deep inferiority complex, and try to alleviate this by proving they are able to work for long hours and days without taking a break. Just like drugs, once a person gets into this habit, it is very difficult for them to stop. They constantly seek acknowledgement and will keep doing things to garner more recognition, even if their minds and bodies refuse to tag along.

5. Poor Physical and Mental Health – Working non-stop is perhaps the lousiest of habits at the workplace. It is also the perfect road to ruining your health and causing grief to your loved ones. A 24-year-old employee of a multinational advertising agency made international headlines earlier this year for having passed away from “overwork” at the company’s Beijing office. It was

reported that he did not leave work before 11 pm every night for an entire month, and eventually died in his office of a heart attack. While it is uncertain whether overwork was really the cause of his demise, it brings to attention how every workplace and home requires mentally and physically balanced individuals who can create a pleasant atmosphere, rather than one of chaos, stress and constant pressure.

6. Ignorance and Denial –

Workaholics often don’t know they are being labeled as such. Again exhibiting traits of a typical addict, they ignore the reality of how their workaholic lifestyle and habits affect their family and coworkers, and often lose their own unique personality traits to the endless cycle of slaving away at their jobs. When confronted by friends, co-workers or family about their workaholic lifestyle, it is likely that they will deny being workaholics and continue persisting in denial and destructive behavior.

7. A Lifetime of Regret – Finally, no

one on their death bed ever says, “I wish I could have worked more.”

And we can conclude this chapter with a great quote from Bertrand Russell, ‘One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one’s work is terribly important.’

This article was adapted from Workaholics are Not Role Models by Thejendra B.S, first published on the author’s website, www.thejendra.com

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

35

BUYS

Dreams of theCrop The Great Singapore Sale might be over but there are still great deals to be had! Family & Life presents you this month’s top picks to snap up, big discount or not. *Prices listed are retail and in SGD.

Housework Wonder: Wobble Washing Get fewer tangles and less damage with your laundry made easy.

Thanks to a newly-developed Wobble Technology in the Samsung Wobble washing machine, fabric damage caused by friction is prevented, without compromising on washing performance. Other features include a Second Generation Diamond Drum to prevent fabrics from getting caught, and an Air Turbo Drying System to reduce drying time. With a long-lasting Digital Inverter Motor technology, Samsung guarantees the durability of the washer’s motor with an 11year warranty.

Price: $1,099 Available at: Major electronic stores

Lifestyle Dream: Coffee, Tea, or MELODY This compact kitchen-top centrepiece isn’t just another coffee machine. The NESCAFE Dolce Gusto MELODY Automatic System comes in a futuristic design that appeals to hedonists with a curvy twist. With an extralarge water tank of 1.3 litres and an all-in-one design so that there is no need for a separate milk frother, you can now brew up a café-styled drinks such as Green Tea Latte and Vanilla Latte Macchiato with near to no hassle. It’s the only system with a patented technology which allows one to make both hot and cold beverages including the Nestea Peach Iced Tea – and even a non-caffeinated Chococino (hot chocolate) which your children will love.

Price: $279 (in Red Metal and Titanium) Available at: All electrical chain stores and selected departmental stores, supermarkets and hypermarkets.

Bags to Bag: Stay Gold, Pony Girl Inspired by the adventurous and creative spirit of horseriding, the Georgina Hobo from BONIA’s Spring/Summer 2013 collection makes for a spacious and classy addition to your wardrobe. We’re digging the embroidered stirrup design and the golden hand-woven handles, which add an elegant yet fun touch to the hobo.

Price: $520 Available at: All major departmental stores

Prima Ballerina Dress to Impress: Zen Romance Women who love simplicity and comfort in their wardrobe will delight in Weekend Sundries’ latest Spring Summer 2013 collection, Play Flight.

Express laid-back femininity and effortless style with this range, which exudes attitude while keeping in line with the label’s overarching clean and timeless aesthetics. It emphasises a strong neutral palette of quality Japanese cottons and silks, with signature prints that include hand-illustrations of leaves and swallows digitally printed on to the lush fabric.

Price: $79 - $269 Available at: Eclecticism (290 Orchard Road, Paragon #03-08), Hook & Union (181 Orchard Road, Orchard Central #02-24/25), and Threadbare & Squirrel (660 North Bridge Road)

Youth Elixir: When Smaller is Better Kiehl’s presents a Powerful Wrinkle & Pore Reducing Cream, developed specifically for the needs of the modern Asian woman who faces problems such as fine lines, wrinkles and dilated pores as they age. Utilizing powerful micronutrients such as copper PCA and calcium PCA, this formula works towards boosted elasticity, smoother skin texture and the diminished appearance of pores, while hydrating the skin with to improve its overall appearance.

Price: $80 for 50ml Available at: All Kiehl’s stores 36

Family & Life • Sept 2013

Picard’s Ballerina bag range is all about poise and splendour, with a hint of rebellion at its heart. Keep that youth going with the head-turning crocodile embossed leather, framed by a delicate signature vintage closure that spells both beauty and tenacity. For mums who want it all, the Shopper Bawllerina ($379, shown in picture) is spacious enough for your everyday essentials and easily catapults your work or weekend outfit from dowdy to divine.

Price: $209 – $379 (various sizes in Green, Taupe and Orange) Available at: Takashimaya, Robinsons and Metro Paragon departmental stores

Home Facial: Morning Scrub-down Face a fruity start to your day with Garnier’s Pure Active Fruit Energy scrub under the Pure Active line, designed for daily use on combination skin. With purifying pomegranate, grapefruit and vitamin C extracts to refresh and stimulate your skin, this scrub is also enriched with salicylic acid to tackle pimple-causing bacteria and blemishes. Exfoliating microbeads also work to free your pores of blackheads and other impurities.

Price: $14.90 for 50ml Available at: Watsons, Guardian, major supermarkets and hypermarkets and selected departmental stores

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

37

BITES

L•Kitchen ve’s

By Michelle Zhu

An avid fan of the local award-winning celebrity chef, Trish enthuses, “We couldn’t think of a better opportunity to have a professional chef to comment on our family recipe and home cooking. Chef Daniel is a reputable professional who has been so willing to share so many sincere and valuable comments, and has helped us to improve a lot during the competition.”

A Winning Formula

Together, Trish and Helen decided on Mee Hoon Kuay as it was one of the first few dishes Trish had picked up from her late grandmother. Before her passing in 2006, the entire family would work together to knead the dough for the noodles. Trish fondly recalls, “Whenever I think of my grandma, I’m always reminded of her traditional Malaysian style Mee Hoon Kuay. However, mum and I weren’t able to master the flavours very successfully.”

Grandma’s passion for food was what spurred 25-year-old Trish to enter a competition with her mother.

Despite it being their very first attempt at competitive cooking, they emerged as the winning team by presenting an unconventional that was the traditional dish, inspired

by Trish’s late grandmother: Mee Hoon Kuay (hand-pulled noodles). The mother and daughter duo tell Family & Life about their love for cooking, and how they remember grandma in the process.

Trish Yee was often chased away from the kitchen as a child because her grandmother preferred to cook alone. At the age of 12, her persistence in learning the secrets of home cuisine finally moved grandma to let Trish in on her culinary secrets.

Since her grandmother’s passing, Trish has taken over the baton as the family cook with the help of her mother, Helen Ang. The spirited young lady now prepares family meals 3 – 4 times a week over weekdays, and cooks up a storm of 7 – 8 dishes at a time during her weekends off from her banking job. Says Helen, 55: “I never really had the opportunity to step into the kitchen when my mother was around.

However, I have always loved reading and exploring food recipes. While Trish helms the cooking in our family kitchen, I always enjoy spending time discussing and trying out new recipes with her.”

Hungry for Critique

Trish and Helen decided to enter the Knorr Family Cookout this year after happening to chance upon the news on the Internet.

Themed ‘Your ingredient to Happy Family Moments’, the competition received over 40 submissions of family recipes and stories, with five contestants being selected at the semi-finals in May by a panel of judges led

by Chef Daniel Koh.

I hope to put my experience to good use by organising corporate and family events which require people to cook together.

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

Although they were unable to replicate grandma’s original dish, their love for Japanese ramen added a creative punch to their noodles. By including Chashu (braised seasoned pork) and Ajitsuke Tamago (marinated soft-boiled egg) to their concoction, the two went on to win the hearts of the judging panel with the final outcome: a Japanese Style Mee Hoon Kuay.

Trish reveals that their winning recipe is also thanks to both her late grandmother and her boyfriend’s mother: “Grandma taught me the method of hand-kneading the noodle dough, while my boyfriend’s mother recently taught me how to flatten

and hand-tear it after adding a little oil.

Let’s just say nothing tastes better than handmade Mee Hoon Kuay when you get to control the texture and thickness of the noodles, and make it exactly the way you like it!”

It’s All About Chemistry

This experience certainly put both mother and daughter’s cooking skills and teamwork abilities to the test. “Some ingredients, such as sweet leaf vegetables, are quite difficult to find in Singapore. We also had to think of how best to present our dish, purchase the items that we want, and practise working together in the kitchen within a very short period of time for preparation,” Trish shares.

However, these setbacks quickly turned into successes. “We learned how to use seasonings to our best advantage and bring out the best flavours of our dish within limited time. With practice, we also now communicate and work together in the kitchen more effectively under time

It’ll be fun!

Cooking together helps to strengthen bonds.

pressure,” Trish says. Her mother adds, “The competition has definitely brought me closer to my daughter. I could really witness the strong passion and flair for cooking, and I’m really happy to have been her assistant to support her throughout.”

Spreading the Love

There’s no doubt their labour has paid off. Chef Daniel Koh is nothing but impressed: “We chose the winning team because of their creativity to reinvent the family recipe of traditional Mee Hoon Kuay with Japanese ingredients, giving the dish a special twist. They also managed to prepare a dish complete with a beautiful presentation, which required a lot of preparation work in such a short time.” He goes on to state, “We hope that they will become inspiration for many to discover the pleasure of home cooking with their family members.”

Trish’s enthusiasm is contagious indeed.

“I hope to put my experience to good use by organising corporate and family events which require people to cook together.

It’ll be fun! Cooking together helps to strengthen bonds, passes on traditions and most importantly, improves the family diet. I am really excited about this new venture, as I strongly believe that team bonding over the creation of a great meal is an excellent way to boost both the team’s morale and increase their creative output.”

The mum and daughter pair intend to use their SGD $5,000 cash prize from the competition to revamp their kitchen, where they spend plenty of time cooking together, and perhaps even on a trip “to experience more varieties of great-tasting food”.

Japanese Style Mee Hoon Kuay

As made by Trish Yee and Helen Ang Yields: 4 Servings Preparation Time: 20 minutes Cooking Time: 40 minutes Ingredients: Mee Hoon Kuay • 300g all purpose flour • 160g water • 2 eggs • 1/2 tsp salt Chicken Char Siu

• 2 pieces of boneless chicken thig hs • 1/4 cup soy sauce • 2 tbsp mirin • 1/2 tbsp ‘Hao Chi’ seasoning • Dash of white pepper powder

Soup Base

Directions: 1. Mix all the ingredients for making the Mee Hoon Kuay together to form dough. Place dough in a plastic wrap and set aside for 30 minutes.

2. Marinate the chicken for 15 min utes and roll the chicken thighs into cylinder shape. Wrap with aluminum foil and tie it tight with a string.

Steam for 30 minutes and refrigerate it for 30 minutes before cutting it into thin slices.

3. In a pot of boiling water, boil eggs for 5.5 minutes. Remove from heat and soak in ice water for 5 minutes. Remove the shell and soak eggs in the seasonin g sauce for 15 minutes. Set aside.

4. In a large pot, bring 1 litre of wate r to boil and add in the soy beans to boil for 20 minutes. Add in 1 cube of Knorr ikan billis stock.

5. Tear the dough into small pieces and throw in the pot and boil the Mee Hoon Kuay till for 5 minutes. Add the ‘ma ni’ vegetables in few minutes before turning off the heat.

6. Serve the Mee Hoon Kuay in larg e bowl, top with chicken char siu and egg.

7. Garnish with fried ikan billis and spring onions.

8. Enjoy the Mee Hoon Kuay with the Dipping Sauce.

• 1 cube of Knorr Ikan Bilis Stoc k • 1 litre of water • 100g yellow beans • 100g ‘ma ni’ vegetables

Ajitsuke Tamago (Lava Egg)

• 1 cup sake • 1/2 tbsp ‘Hao Chi’ seasoning • 1/2 cup soy sauce • 1/2 cup mirin • 4 eggs

Dipping Sauce

• 1/2 tsp ‘Hao Chi’ seasoning • 4 tbsp soya sauce • 2 chili padi • 1 lime

For more recipes from Trish Yee, visit her website at www.yeeskitchen.com

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

39

BITES

FO D for

Smart Snacks

Dark Chocolate

Perhaps you’ve heard of how cacao beans work wonders with their magical endorphin-boosting properties. Dark chocolate, preferably with over 70% cacao bean content, lowers blood pressure and cholesterol with its cancerfighting antioxidant properties as well. This delicious, velvety treat adored by children and adults alike also contains minute amounts of Theobromine, a natural stimulant which helps your child to focus, and even functions as a suppressant for chronic coughing.

Vanessa: It is true that dark chocolate contains theobromine, caffeine (both stimulants) and several antioxidants, but it also contains sugar and saturated fat. Too much of it could lead to blood glucose surges followed by a sudden drop in glucose levels, which could then lead to lethargy.

Peanut Butter

Thought We’ve all heard about the detrimental effects of junk food, and how poor food choices may negatively affect your child’s mental well-being and memory. But almost every child possesses a little tooth for sweets and other unwholesome treats.

So how then, do we keep their brains energised and humming throughout the day, without having to resort to shoving carrot sticks and apples down their throat?

Before submitting to your child’s constant nagging for a trip down to the fast food restaurant, just remember that the trans-fats, fatty acids, sodium, gluten and more found in fast food are known to impair brain synapses, which are highly linked to our learning and memory abilities. It also doesn’t help that sugary foods and sweets, another favourite of young children, tend to metabolise very quickly to eventually cause lethargy, fatigue, and negative behavioural issues resulting from the sudden spike and drop in blood sugar levels.

However, given that a perfect world free of junk and processed food is unlikely, criminalising the occasional unhealthy snack might just cause your parenting efforts to backfire – by making the “forbidden fruit” appear even more desirable.

So, what can a parent do to teach a child to eat healthily while still making sure the snacks are full of flavour?

Together with Vanessa McNamara from the Travelling Dietitian, we highlight a few surprisingly smart snack options that your entire family can dig into. In moderation, of course.

Criminalising even the occasional unhealthy snacking at all might just cause your efforts to backfire, making the “forbidden food” seem more desirable.

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

The peanut butter loving world is a brainy one, too. There are a ton of nutrients, all of which the brain requires, which are present in peanut butter and inevitably, peanuts. These include high levels of protein, which contribute to energy and mental alertness; vitamins E and B3 (Niacin) to prevent the breakdown of brain cells; and minerals such as copper and potassium to enhance brain/ nerve signals and function.

Vanessa: I agree that peanut butter is full of nutrients and energy for optimal brain function, including protein, vitamin E and monounsaturated fats. However, it is best to choose the ‘no added salt/sugar’ variety for it to be even more nutritious.

Popcorn

When it’s time to gather round to watch movies at home on family day, there’s no need to refrain from indulging in your favourite cinema grub. Popcorn is fun to make, and these fluffy morsels are high in vitamin B6 and B12 to improve your child’s brain’s functioning, memory and focus. Popcorn is also rich in anti-oxidants which prevent damage to cells, and high in essential minerals such as iron, calcium and phosphorus.

Vanessa: Popcorn is an excellent snack as it has a low GI (glycaemic index). It keeps you feeling full and keeps your blood glucose levels stable for longer periods of time. I would only advise snacking on plain popcorn however, as flavoured popcorn often contains high amounts of both fat and sugar.

Walnuts

It’s uncanny coincidence that these crunchy snackers resemble the human brain. Their high Omega 3 fat content oils up your child’s thinking gears, as well as contain high levels of health-boosting nutrients such as manganese, copper, iron and phosphorous. These yummy health-boosters are best before bedtime: a 2005 study conducted by the University of Texas Health Science Center has shown that walnuts significantly increases our levels of melatonin, one of the body’s natural sleep regulating hormones.

Vanessa: Walnuts are an excellent snack and source of ALA, a form of omega-3 fatty acids which support optimal brain function. Additionally, Linseeds (or flaxseeds) and Chia seeds are also suitable plant sources of ALA.

Cheese

Cheeses come in a variety of tastes and textures, providing a delightful and novelty-filled experience for snacking. Cheese, along with other dairy products, have long been criticized for their links to obesity and heart disease, but recent studies suggest it is also linked to brain development. A 2012 U.S. and Australian research study involving 1,000 adults indicated that those who consumed dairy products regularly had generally scored better on tests of mental ability than those who never, or rarely, consumed dairy.

Vanessa: I wouldn’t say our brains depend heavily on cheese, but cheese and other dairy products do make for suitable brain-boosting foods as they have a low GI, and thus keep energy levels stable for longer. They are also a valuable source of calcium, which helps to keep our bones strong and supports electrical signals in the nervous system, including brain function.

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Turning science into potential From 2 years From 10 months Sept 2013 • Family & Life

41

BITES

Forbidden F

ds

By Dr Soh Jian Yi

The Truth About Food Allergies

Food allergies are a common problem, and a common concern, to parents and doctors worldwide. Singapore is no exception to this rule. In our society, what is known about food allergy is often passed down through word of mouth, and more recently, the Internet has become another source of information.

Unfortunately, this information – some true, some false – can prove to be confusing. The beliefs differ from family to family and from website to website, and can at times contradict each other.

Here are answers to some of the common questions that parents have about food allergy:

Q

Which are the foods children are often allergic to? When do these allergies appear?

Parents of children with food allergy will notice two main patterns depending on the age of their child: 1 For young children, usually infants (babies less than a year old): aside from breastmilk, infant formula (cow’s milk) is often the first food that babies are exposed to. Egg is another common food that babies will be fed. Consequently, those who have allergy to cow’s milk and eggs, will be noticed at this age.

2 For older children above 5 years of age: allergy to shellfish – prawns, crabs, lobsters, mussels, oysters, and so on – is the most common issue among older children, as well as adults. Older children may also develop allergy to other foods, the more commonly-seen types being peanuts, tree nuts, wheat, soy, and fish.

Q

My child had a rash. I think it might be due to a food allergy. What should I do?

Parents often first become concerned over a rash after the child eats something.

However, rashes can be due to many reasons, and the most common causes of rash in children are those related to infections and “heat rash”, rather than food or drugs.

If you suspect your child has a food allergy, do consult with your paediatrician or a paediatrician who specialises in allergy. It is important for your doctor to diagnose whether a child truly has a food allergy or

not, as this has implications for the child’s long-term diet.

Q

If I think my child has a food allergy, shouldn’t I just avoid the food? Do I really need to see a doctor?

The first abovementioned implication is on the child’s diet. Some of the ingredients your child might be allergic to are found in different food products. A child with true food allergy can be accidentally exposed to the same food again, resulting in future reactions that can be more severe, or even life-threatening. Here, your doctor can appropriately advise you on what foods your child cannot take, so as to avoid this problem. Your doctor can also teach you about what to do if your child develops an allergic reaction, and may prescribe medication for such an event.

If the food ingredient is a common one in a regular diet, your doctor can also advise you on reasonable alternatives to ensure your child’s nutrition, growth and development is not compromised. For example, in children with cow’s milk allergy, cases of malnourished children due to excessively restricted diets have been reported. To make matters more complicated, many children “outgrow” certain food allergies, such as cow’s milk and hen’s eggs. Finding out when this happens and being able to allow the child to safely take those foods again, is something that your child’s doctor can do.

Conversely, a child without food allergy may be unnecessarily forced to avoid certain foods because of the parents’ beliefs.

An example would be in a child with suspected cow’s milk allergy. Cow’s milk is a common ingredient in dairy products. If the child does not have cow’s milk allergy but the parents think he/she does, they may have their child unnecessarily avoid all milk and dairy products, which are important sources of nutrition to the growing child.

The second implication is the stress and anxiety that parents and children face

when they do not know (or mistakenly believe) if a child has food allergy. This means checking the ingredient lists on processed foods bought at the supermarket, food prepared at the childcare centre, kindergarten, school canteens, overnight camping trips, school outings, family reunions, and so on. There is enough stress in everyone’s daily life, such that this burden should not be unnecessarily added on to anyone, child or parent.

Q

Can food allergies actually be prevented or avoided?

There is no obvious way to do this.

It was previously thought that pregnant mothers eating certain “allergenic” foods, like cow’s milk and eggs, or early introduction of these foods into the baby’s diet, increased the risk of a child developing an allergy. This led to varying practices among parents – with some delaying, for instance, the introduction of egg until well after the age of 1 year; and others completely avoiding nuts and shellfish for years – it had also influenced the feeding guidelines of wellknown organizations, such as that of the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).

In 2000, the AAP’s feeding guidelines recommended that breastfeeding mothers of infants at high risk for developing allergy should avoid cow’s milk, egg, fish, peanuts and tree nuts. Parents were also instructed that solid foods should not be introduced into the diet of high-risk infants until 6 months of age, with delay in the introduction of dairy products, eggs, peanuts, nuts and fish.

In 2008, the AAP reversed its stand in its feeding guidelines. This is because there is no evidence showing that having a pregnant mother avoid certain foods, or delaying the introduction of solid food beyond 4 - 6 months of the infant’s age, actually prevented the development of food allergy. There is some evidence to suggest that deliberately avoiding foods may, in fact, increase the risk of allergy.

Q

If the child’s parents, brothers or sisters have food allergy, how likely is it that the child will have a food allergy too?

The chance of “inheriting” a food allergy is small. There is a genetic component – that is, a risk due to the common genes in the family – but it appears that the environment plays a big role in determining whether a person actually gets a food allergy. Unfortunately, no one yet knows for certain what it is in the environment that determines this.

Q

My child is allergic to eggs. Can the MMR vaccine be given safely to him/her?

Yes. No extra precautions, such as taking medications beforehand or delaying the MMR vaccine, are needed in children with an egg allergy.

Dr Soh Jian Yi Associate Consultant Division of Paediatric Allergy, Immunology and Rheumatology, National University Hospital

42

Family & Life • Sept 2013

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For Circulation in Singapore Only Sept 2013 • Family & Life

43

Happenings

Watch ut!

You can’t go wrong with these what-to-sees, whereto-gos and what-to-dos.

Whether you’re young or old, there are plenty of activities for the whole family to have fun together.

Barbie LIVE! Every little girl’s favourite doll comes alive in this all-new musical production featuring the eponymous female lead with her best friend and co-star Teresa as they go about shooting their latest film. Unfortunately, Barbie’s BFF begins to doubt her moviemaking ability, so Barbie uses the lessons she learned from her past experiences in her Princess movies – Swan Lake, Princess and the Popstar, etc. – to teach her best friend to be brave, believe in herself and embrace the power of true friendship.

This musical promises to be fun for the entire family, even the boys, as they sing, dance and smile their way to success.

When: 10 – 14 September 2013 Where: Sands Theatre Ticket prices start from S$35 and can be purchased from www.sistic.com.sg and www.marinabaysands.com.

People and Places – The Learning Gallery @ SAM The Learning Gallery is the Singapore Art Museum’s permanent exhibition dedicated to presenting artworks that promote engagement and discussion, and also aims to nurture an appreciation for art in young visitors.

From now until 31 December 2013, The Learning Gallery is showcasing People and Places, a collection of 20 Southeast Asian contemporary art works that look at the people, places and spaces around us. This exhibition addresses themes such as self-identity, social identity, relationships, society and culture, and is perfect for your older children who are beginning to get a sense of what is happening in the world.

When: Now until 31 December 2013 Where: Singapore Art Museum, 71 Bras Basah Road Admission: FREE

Run for a Cause: Great Eastern Women’s Run 2013 Asia’s favourite all-women run is back this year.

The Run, commissioned by Great Eastern Life and organised by HiVelocity Events Pte Ltd, will take place on Sunday, 10 November 2013. Run past iconic landmarks such as Marina Bay Sands, Merlion Park, Esplanade, Singapore Flyer, F1 Pit Building and upcoming Singapore Sports Hub. Said Dr Khoo Kah Siang, CEO (Singapore), Great Eastern Life, “The Run is not just for ALL women, but for their families and friends as well.

They can all expect a memorable time.”

As per last year, participants can opt to run for a good cause. They can select from four womenrelated charities or run for a cause they personally endorse. The four charities are the Breast Cancer Foundation, Singapore Cancer Society (Cervical Cancer Prevention Fund), Singapore Heart Foundation and the Singapore Council of Women’s Organisations. ‘Leisure runners’ may register for the “5km Live Great! Fun Run” category, while two new sub-categories have been added for the 10km and 21km this year, where runners from the same company can sign up in teams of four if they don’t wish to run alone.

When: 10 November 2013 Where: Race begins at the Float@Marina Bay For registration fees and more details, visit www.greateasternwomensrun.com

Asia UNO Challenge – Singapore Finals

g Prince The Tale of the Fro story of an e the delightful

gs to lif Frog Prince brin ve’s kiss.

The Tale of the lo ce saved by true enchanted prin wicked of a frog since a ce, the rm fo e th in k s been stuc d appearan Prince Phillip ha him. Ashamed of his outwar Rosalie finds on ss l ce el in sp g Pr witch cast a amp, where youn the spell can only be sw a in s de hi ce , frog prin og prince ording to the fr ue. Will Prince him one day. Acc om one whose love for him is tr arance? pe fr broken by a kiss ve undeterred by his outward ap lo ue tr Phillip find by t to judge a book hes children no ac ts te ul ce ad in us Pr to r og de Fr The Tale of the serves as a light-hearted remin respect. so d al d an an ss r, ne ve nd co ki its ne with yo er ev t ea tr ld ay is sure to be a that we shou hy tunes, this pl tc ca d an rs te ac urful char s dialogue, colo With humorou ce. en ribet-ing experi s. for 2 - 6-year-old are available Recommended onal show timescatherine@srt. iti dd A . gs in ok 8166 or at ol/group bo ailable for scho se contact Catherine on 6733 ea Discounts are av Pl . ol bookings for group/scho iries. qu en r com.sg fo mpany T’s The Little Co r 2013 be Presented by SR em ust - 29 Sept When: 29 Aug s Centre - Home of SRT rt A BS Where: D

Everyone’s favourite family card game is upgrading its venue from the dinner table to the big stage with the Asia UNO Challenge. Watch and cheer on your favourite young UNO players who will be discarding cards, staring down other opponents and shouting ‘UNO!’ with gusto this month, with the winner representing Singapore in the first ever 2013 Asia UNO challenge in Tokyo in November 2013.

There will also be demonstrations, games and activities for your family to participate in during the semi-finals and finals of the event, so make space in your calendar for this event that will be fun for everyone involved!

When: 5 – 15 September 2013. Semi-finals and finals will be on 14 and 15 September 2013.

Where: Atrium, City Square Mall Admission: FREE

44

Family & Life • Sept 2013

The Jewel Box at Mount Faber

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

45

OP-ED

My two cents on...

Helicopter Parenting

By Vivien Teng

In this exclusive series, our guest columnists-parents weigh in on the issues that are closest to their hearts.

This month, one parent is just about ready to put on the war paint and fight for her son, but something holds her back.

I was prepared to go to battle for my son in this instance.

I find great joy and satisfaction in being a parent. When Evan was born, I threw myself into my role as a mom with gusto and enthusiasm. I read parenting books and articles. I visited parenting websites. I did flashcards with Evan and enrolled the both of us in all kinds of baby programmes (including a baby massage therapy course which my husband still brings up as an example of my frivolous spending). Nevertheless, when Chrissie arrived a few years later, I did the same. It was exhilarating to be introduced to this new world of exploration and discovery, to experience things vicariously through my innocent children’s eyes.

Now, Evan is 7-years-old and conquering new challenges as a Primary 2 student, while Chrissie is almost 5-years-old and in Kindergarten. As Evan and Chrissie tread the path towards maturity and freedom (for them and me!), I constantly re-evaluate my role as a mom.

I recently came across this term – “helicopter parenting”. It means the parent who is constantly hovering over their child, who is trying to solve their child’s problem(s), who oversees, who perfects, who does things for their child without letting the child try, who overprotects. An over-involved parent, so to speak.

Helicopter parenting is said to have a devastating effect on a child – lack of selfconfidence, lack of independence, inability to deal with problems, just to name a few – and is just as bad as neglectful parenting.

Of course, it would be obvious that we, as parents, would not want to be fall in either category of extreme parenting. It is also obvious that we would want the best for our children and want to have them grow up as well-adjusted, thoughtful, helpful, kind, polite, well-mannered individuals while still retaining their spunky personalities (in Evan’s and Chrissie’s case, though, they might be a little too spunky).

But, I realise that I find it hard to reach a balance between being over-parenting and being involved.

Especially when my kids, not too long ago, were helpless infants who depended on me for every single thing – feeding, bathing, putting them to sleep, kissing away hurt fingers, everything. I cheered them on when they took their first step, uttered their first word (“mama” for both) and drew their first unrecognisable stick figures. But, they are now in school (preschool for Chrissie and primary school for Evan), and I wonder, whether it is time to let go.

Especially when I am a working mom, and time with my kids is precious. In a way,

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Family & Life • Sept 2013

..by taking a step back, so that they can, in my absence, discover their own strengths and harness their potential.

I feel guilty about being away from them when I am working and am therefore more indulgent than I ought to be.

I thought that being nurturing was the defining aspect of a parent. I hug, kiss, encourage, read, play, laugh, craft and do all sorts of things with my kids. The disciplinarian part of parenting was not natural for me, but I am getting the hang of it.

However, I recognise now that there is also another aspect of me that wants to mow down hedges and obstacles standing in the way of my children’s happiness, to lash out at people who make my kids cry, especially those who hurt, humiliate, malign or belittle them. I, a non-confrontational pacifist, would turn into a proverbial lioness to protect my cubs.

Recently, Evan did poorly for a test. He was careless and missed out words from a sentence restructuring exercise (resulting in the entire section being marked wrong).

In this exercise, the words are all jumbled up and one had to string the words into a coherent sentence. It sounds easy, but it is rather difficult when it is in Chinese. Evan had actually conscientiously numbered the words, but in copying them onto the line below, he had missed some words out. I was not worried, since I thought that Evan essentially knew his work. I just reminded him to do his work more conscientiously in the future.

I only found out later that week (from Evan’s classmates, not from Evan) that the Chinese teacher had made Evan stand up in class and mocked him. The Chinese teacher said that Evan was not fit to be in his Chinese class and asked him to carry his bag to the next class.

I was furious when I found out. I wanted to confront the teacher, and give him a piece of my mind and ban him from ever coming

near my child again. It is okay to discipline my child if he had been disruptive, naughty, disobedient or inattentive. I understand that. But when a child is not doing well in a subject? Wouldn’t it be our responsibility as parents and educators to teach this child instead of humiliating him?

I was prepared to go to battle for my son in this instance.

Yet, in doing so, am I assuming fragility instead of resilience and tenacity in my children? Are they unable to take a little drilling, a few harsh words? If I am there to wipe away every tear, what message am I sending to my children? If I defend them at every single turn, how will they learn to defend themselves?

To love my children is to equip them for life. And just as it is not possible to feed them or bathe them the way I did when they were younger, I can no longer *do* everything for them if I want them to stride towards maturity.

And so, after careful consideration, I have decided to empower Evan and Chrissie by taking a step back, so that they can, in my absence, discover their own strengths and harness their potential. I will be there, should they ever need me. But it is not necessary, and indeed it is presumptuous, to assume that I am needed all the time.

I will leave it to Boy and Girlie to let me know if I am needed. And maybe in some circumstances, I can go one step further by telling them that I am NOT needed because they can very well handle that situation on their own. Wouldn’t that be something?

So, I didn’t confront his teacher. But I did speak to Evan about the incident. Evan said he was not upset with his teacher because his teacher probably wanted to motivate him to do well. And, from that conversation, I am convinced that, it is the right time to let go.

Sept 2013 • Family & Life

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Family & Life • Sept 2013