Creative Loafing Tampa — February 9, 2023

PUBLISHER James Howard

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ray Roa

DIGITAL EDITOR Colin Wolf

MANAGING EDITOR Kyla Fields

STAFF WRITER Justin Garcia

FOOD and THEATER CRITIC

Jon Palmer Claridge

FILM & TV CRITIC John W. Allman

IN-HOUSE WITCH Caroline DeBruhl

CONTRIBUTORS Josh Bradley, Carter Brantley,Thomas Hallock

Story

PHOTOGRAPHERS Dave Decker

SPRING INTERN Tyana Rodgers

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CREATIVE DIRECTOR Jack Spatafora

GRAPHIC DESIGNER Joe Frontel

ILLUSTRATORS Dan Perkins, Cory Robinson, Bob Whitmore

SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES

Anthony Carbone, Scott Zepeda

SeaWorld in February, animal rights claiming the practice of keeping wild dangerous. But even though public many don’t see a parallel between the kind and the practice of displaying animals asking for too much? Or is it time for a “entertainment” animals?

MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND EVENTS DIRECTOR

Alexis Quinn Chamberlain

at SeaWorld in February, animal rights claiming the practice of keeping wild and dangerous. But even though public widespread, many don’t see a parallel between the kind Vick and the practice of displaying animals activists asking for too much? Or is it time for a “entertainment” animals?

MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND EVENTS COORDINATOR Lauren Caplinger

EUCLID MEDIA GROUP

CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER

Andrew Zelman

CHIEF OPERATING OFFICERS

Chris Keating, Michael Wagner

Tampa Bay

EXECUTIVE EDITOR Sarah Fenske

VP OF DIGITAL SERVICES Stacy Volhein

REGIONAL OPERATIONS DIRECTOR

Hollie Mahadeo

DIGITAL OPERATIONS COORDINATOR

Jaime Monzon

euclidmediagroup.com

cltampa.com cldeals.com

EDITORIAL POLICY — Creative Loafing Tampa is a publication covering public issues, the arts and entertainment. In our pages appear views from across the political and social spectrum. They do not necessarily represent the views

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USA TODAY 10 BEST

Get sauced

St. Pete pier’s BBQ festival, and more things to do.

By Ray Roa

If you’re at the St. Pete Pier this weekend and see smoke in the air, don’t worry. Teams from across the country are in The ‘Burg to find out who has the best barbecue pulled pork, ribs, sausage and sauce.

After being postponed late last year, tickets to the Sunshine City Smokeout happening Saturday, Feb. 11 from noon-9 p.m. at Spa Beach Park in the shadow of the St. Pete Pier are on sale now and start at $15. VIP includes seating in the shade, drink tickets and light snacks. (cldeals.com is also offering a $10 deal for general admission and $45 for VIP).

Attendees will be able to vote for their favorite pit crew, and food costs anywhere from $5-$20, according to event organizers. It’s supposed to be in the mid-60s on Saturday, with minimal chance of precipitation, but the event is happening rain or shine.

Bobby Friss, a classic-rock favorite at motorcycle festivals across Tampa Bay, headlines the music lineup, which includes Logan Grant (whose band the Show Ponies is secretly one of the best bar bands in town), plus unabashed big hair, rock and roll impresarios The Dirty Janes.

And if you're a BBQ lover who won't leave Tampa for anything, keep Feb. 18 opens since that's the day that a " Beer, Bourbon & BBQ" festival takes over downtowns Curtis Hixon Waterfront Park, complete with whole smoked hogs.

The Florida Orchestra: Soundwaves chamber concerts The series is a unique opportunity to experience TFO’s world-class musicians playing chamber music in an intimate setting. Church of the Ascension hosts, welcoming fans into a nearly 100-year-old historic Episcopal church (rare for downtown Clearwater!) that is an icon of Florida Gothic architecture. Read more on p. 53. Friday, Feb. 10, 8 p.m. $25. Church of the Ascension, 701 Orange Ave., Clearwater. floridaorchestra.org

9th Annual St. Petersburg Fine Art Festival Downtown St. Pete will be taken over by hundreds of local artists, all peddling their artistic wares. From painters and sculptors to ceramicists, photographers, woodworkers and any other type of art you can think of, the St. Petersburg Fine Art Festival will showcase a variety of the Bay’s artisans. Saturday. Feb. 11, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Free. South Straub Park, 198 Bayshore Dr. NE, St. Petersburg. paragonfestivals.com—Kyla Fields

La Gaceta The Documentary screening Filmmakers Lynn Marvin Dingfelder and Larry Wiezycki squeeze 100 years of history into just over 60 minutes as they document La Gaceta, the country’s only tri-lingual newspaper, which has documented Tampeño politics, news, social fodder and more since 1922. Saturday, Feb. 11, 2 p.m. $10.50-$13.50. Tampa Theatre, 711 N Franklin St., Tampa. tampatheatre.org

MEAT ME THERE: After postponement last year, St. Pete’s ‘Sunshine City Smokeout’ is on.

Late Night is Back!

Late Night is Back!

Every day, Creative Loafing Tampa Bay readers submit events to the CL event calendar, so we’ve pulled out some of the best. Have a look, put this paper down, call a friend, and get out there. To be considered for this listing, please submit your event at cltampa.com.

Bad Mother: Coffee talk & latte throwdown Bad Mother has been chosen as the first stop on the Central Florida Coffee Circuit sponsored by SoFlo and Oatly. Events kickoff Friday, Feb. 10 with a panel on community and the future of the coffee industry (BYOB). Feb. 11 is our first Latte Art Throwdown! Baristas will compete for cash and prizes. The Nooj—owner of Tampa’s iconic Bed of Roses—will be inking a few lucky attendees. Doors and DJ at 6:30PM. Pizza & beer (with ID and wristband). Come party! FridaySaturday, Feb. 10-11. Free to attend ($20 to compete in throwdown). Bad Mother, 260 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg. badmother.co

Cupid’s Undie Run Thousands of undie runners in cities all across the U.S. come together, whether it be in-person or virtually, to support a good cause. Cupid’s Undie Run kicks off with drinking and dancing, then we jog it out with a mile(ish) run and end it all with an epic dance party! Friday, Feb. 10, noon-4 p.m. $40. Ferg’s Sports Bar & Grill, 1320 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. my.cupids.org

Hope Spot Festival An ocean-themed low waste event with hands-on experiences, arts & crafts, DJ, live music, food, drinks, games, waterfront cleanup, live native animals, speakers, and guided fun activities! This festival is a celebration that focuses on our Florida Gulf Coast Hope Spot and keeping it healthy. It features over 65 ocean-focused

exhibitors and sustainable vendors, including Florida Aquarium, Clearwater Aquarium, Zoo Tampa and more! A waterfront cleanup on foot or by kayak (9 a.m.), plus “Eat Drink Local” (limited tickets, 3 p.m.-5 p.m.) Saturday, Feb. 11, 10 aa.m.-5 p.m. Free with reservation. Edgewater Park, 51 Main St., Dunedin. bluegreenconn.org

Monster Energy Supercross If last weekend’s Monster Jam wasn’t enough. Monster Energy AMA Supercross is the most competitive and highest-profile offroad motorcycle racing championship on the planet. Supercross attracts some of the largest and most impressive crowds inside the most recognizable and prestigious stadiums in North America to race in front of nearly one million live fans and broadcast to millions more worldwide. Saturday, Feb. 11, 6:30 p.m. $25 & up. Raymond James Stadium, 4201 N Dale Mabry Hwy., Tampa. supercrosslive.com

Florida Conversations: Voices of Carver City/Lincoln Gardens Lisa Armstrong, Ph.D. shares stories and research from her quest to uncover the history of Carver City/ Lincoln Gardens. Armstrong uses ethnographic research methods to gain insight into Black experiences and perspectives from this small but important historically Black neighborhood in Tampa. Wednesday, Feb. 15, 6 p.m. Free with registration. Tampa Bay History Center, 801 Water St., Tampa. tampabayhistorycenter.org

Florida State Fair $3 Thursday

Discounted rides, games and select food ($3, duh) after 3 p.m. until 9 p.m. Florida State Fairgrounds, 4800 N U.S.-Hwy 301, Tampa. floridastatefair.com

Bone home

Photos by Dave Decker

Nine years after it set a Guinness world record for largest triceratops skeleton—and 66 million years since it actually roamed the earth— Big John is finally coming together at its new, permanent home in Tampa Bay. Last Wednesday, downtown Tampa’s Glazer Children’s Museum unboxed the fossil’s 700-pound skull, complete with the trademark triceratops horns.

The completed skeleton is being assembled by a team from Zoic, a paleontology company based in Trieste, Italy. Zoic specializes in the extraction and processing of fossil remains, and its work won’t be available to see until Big John’s

anticipated unveiling Memorial Day weekend. As previously reported, the nearly 26-foot long and 10-foot-tall fossil is the centerpiece of Glazer’s brand new exhibit, which will take viewers into the Late Cretaceous period. The exhibit will include tunnels with clear domes, where curious kids and adults can pop up and see the fossil from underneath. (If you don’t have a kid, the museum is relaxing its rule that keeps adults without kids from entering throughout Big John's stay.)

Read more, and see all the photos from the unveiling and assembly, via ctampa.com/slideshows.—Ray Roa

Model:

What’s going on

Update on Hanna City Center leaves Tampa council searching for more.

By Justin Garcia

Last Thursday, Tampa city staff gave an update about the City Center at Hanna Avenue project, but in the end, city council was left wanting more information. The update came after no documentation was provided related to the project’s apprenticeship program, which is designed to train young workers as the project is built.

The lack of information raised the concerns of several council members, along with union representatives about the project. Over the past year the project has been met with criticism, after the $108 million contract was given to DPR Construction without a public bid, which is required by state law.

But Adri Colina, Director of Logistics and Asset Management for the city, attempted to put council and the public’s concerns to rest. “I am proud to stand before you today with a very good news story,” Colina said.

She pointed out that DPR voluntarily entered into the apprenticeship agreement, because Tampa city requiring apprentices didn’t go into effect until after the Hanna Avenue project was approved. She said that 26 apprentices have worked on the project so far, and that most of them are still on the job, or have moved to other sites to continue their apprenticeships.

Pay for the apprentices depends on experience. The average pay for the apprentices, Colina said, is $18.55. The highest paid apprentice was paid $24.77 and the lowest was paid $15.18. Colina added that all of the apprenticeship programs are certified by the state, which the law requires.

Multiple council people asked for documentation of what Colina was saying, because it hadn’t been provided before the meeting. They also had requested DPR representatives to be present to answer questions, but none were available during the time of the council meeting.

Councilman Guido Maniscalco wanted to know how many apprentices live in the City of Tampa, as opposed to other cities and counties. During the public comment portion of the council meeting, three apprentices had shown up to talk about their experience, most of them praising DPR. But only one of the three said they lived in city limits.

“This is one of the largest projects we’ve ever spent our money on, but we have to make it as

meaningful as possible in trying to lift up our own community and give them a better life path to the American dream,” Maniscalco said.

Orlando Gudes, councilman for District 5 in East Tampa where the city center is being constructed, suggested recruiting more from that area. He said that putting up signs around the neighborhoods can help.

“I couldn’t agree with you more,” Colina said. “And we have aggressively tried to do that.”

She said that one of the apprentices who spoke at council lives in the area that the

construction is taking place in. She said that DPR has hosted job fairs and recruited online aggressively.

Councilwoman Lynn Hurtak wanted to see an increase in the amount of apprentices on the project. She also pointed out that the pay for apprentices was low compared to union apprentice wages. “I think we could have done better than that,” Hurtak said.

Colina responded that the first few months of the project was for soil remediation, which didn’t afford an opportunity to bring on apprentices. However she said that now that they’re moving toward interior work on the project, they hope to increase the amount of apprentices and the hours that they spend training.

But Hurtak and other council members wanted more specifics on the apprenticeship classes and how they’re conducted. And they wanted exact numbers on how many are from Tampa proper, as opposed to from other areas of Florida.

LOCAL NEWS

They also wanted documentation related to the project and on the certifications for the apprenticeship programs, so they can look at it with their own eyes.

“What I want is more specifics about this project and how the apprenticeship is actually going, because this is the kind of stuff that we’re going to be looking for in future apprenticeship programs,” Hurtak said.

Council voted unanimously for staff to return on Feb. 16 with more answers.

“What I want is more specifics about this project”

GOING UP: City Center at Hanna Avenue in August 2022.

Accrual world

Unpaid taxes surface in Tampa City Council race.

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By Justin Garcia

Acandidate for Tampa city council district

two has built up a large amount of unpaid taxes during the past several years. Tax documents from the Hillsborough Clerk of Court website name candidate Mike Suarez as owing $63,750 to the Internal Revenue Service (IRS) as of June of last year.

The unpaid taxes started in 2012, but the largest unpaid amounts occurred from 2016-2018. In those years, Suarez collectively failed to pay $46,207. Last year, the IRS placed a lien against Suarez, which is a legal claim asking for property after ongoing nonpayment of taxes.

on his personal taxes, and didn’t understand why the document names the business department.

Currently, Suarez works as a commercial insurance agent and has around three decades of business experience.

ELECTIONS

He’s a former Tampa city council member who served for two terms before running an unsuccessful campaign for mayor against Jane Castor in 2019. In Tampa’s municipal election, he’s running against Michael Derewenko, Guido Maniscalco, Robin Lockett and Gary Pruitt. A big part of city council’s job is making decisions for Tampa’s budget.

Last week, Suarez told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay he’s sent a check to the IRS within the past week to make things right.

“It will be paid off or has been paid off,” Suarez said. “I don’t know when they’re going to receive the check, it was sent directly. And so my guess is that it’ll probably happen this week or maybe next week.”

Suarez said that despite the issues with his own finances, his time as a leader gives him the experience that people can rely on. “This is more of a burden for me, than it is for the people of the City of Tampa,” Suarez told CL. “Part of the reason why you run for council is to show who you are and going forward. If someone is not going to vote for me because I’ve now paid off my taxes, then that’s OK, too.”

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CL has reached out to a media contact at the IRS to see if the organization has received the check he says he sent.

When asked how the unpaid taxes were accrued, Suarez said he was misled by the person who was handling his taxes. “When you’re getting bad advice and not knowing that you are getting bad advice, you have to pay regardless,” Suarez said. “We make mistakes in life and pay for them, and I am paying for them, dearly.”

He added that he has since parted ways with the tax advisor, and that he only used funds from his personal assets and bank accounts to pay off the debt. Suarez’ wife is also named in the tax document and the IRS department handling the claim is the “small business” department. However, Suarez, 58, said that all of the owed money is based

Suarez is not the only candidate for council to face financial woes this election season. Earlier this month, CL first reported that city council chair and candidate for district one, Joe Citro, was having his council paycheck garnished for unpaid debt.

Suarez said he’s looking forward to what develops in the council race during the coming months. He noted that it’s a saying in Tampa that the municipal races don’t really heat up until after Gasparilla, which happened and the end of January. “Now, the race has really started,” he said.

Early voting for Tampa’s elections begins Feb. 27. Voting by mail ballots must be requested by Feb. 25, due to a new law passed by Governor Ron DeSantis. Election Day is Tuesday, March 7, with the polls closing at 7 p.m.

“We make mistakes in life and pay for them.”

CASH ME OUTSIDE: Mike Suarez says he’s sent a check to the IRS to make it right.

Is this thing on?

CL, Florida Phoenix and Axios reporters team up for radio show.

By Ray Roa

The “Political Animal” is back on the radio airwaves in Tampa, and he’s bringing some company.

Mitch Perry, who earned his nickname while at Creative Loafing Tampa Bay from 2009-2014, drives the bus for a new 60-minute program that airs 11 a.m.-noon, Fridays on WMNF Tampa 88.5FM, starting after a news brief from National Public Radio.

LOCAL NEWS

The Skinny

Last week, Orlando-based state Rep. Anna Eskamani called in to discuss what she saw outside a recent New College board meeting, which she was barred from attending. In her comments, she called DeSantis’ attack on diversity, equity and inclusion courses at Florida schools a “fascist takeover” of the Sunshine State’s education system.

Fridays, 11 a.m.-noon, WMNF Tampa 88.5-FM wmnf.org

Perry—now back at Florida Phoenix after a stint with Bay News 9—is joined weekly by Axios Tampa Bay’s Ben Montgomery plus CL’s Ray Roa, with occasional appearances by CL Staff Writer Justin Garcia, Axios’s Selene San Felice, plus guests who’ll discuss the news of the week.

In the first show, we introduced ourselves and discussed topics like Florida GOP daddy Ron DeSantis and Tampa’s upcoming municipal election.

And yes, we’re taking phone calls. Join us by tuning your radio to 88.5-FM, hitting the “listen” tab on wmnf.org or on the WMNF app.

Tampa Bay Times lays off four newsroom staffers

In less exciting local media news, after almost three years of relative calm, the Tampa Bay Times completed a new round of newsroom layoffs last week, including two full-timers and two par-timers. Read more via cltampa.com/news.

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Klee’s telegram

Florida’s political toying with education fills me with terror.

By Thomas Hallock

On April 21, 1933 the visionary modernist and teacher Paul Klee received a telegram, firing him from the Düsseldorf Art Academy. The message came from acting director Julius Paul Junghanns, a traditionalist whose work was more appreciated by Germany’s freshly solidified Nationalist Socialist party. The telegram to Klee is the first thing visitors see at Düsseldorf’s spectacular K20 Museum.

Not Picasso. Not Matisse. Not Gerhard Richter, nor Klee himself, none of the avant garde’s household names. But a telegram.

ridiculous salutes, the shuddering Holocaust. But we easily forget where the story begins. In their assault on humanity, the Nazis party started with culture and art.

COLUMNS

The political toying with education in Florida now fills me with terror. Last Tuesday, a board of trustees stacked by Ron DeSantis replaced New College president Patricia Okker with the right-wing former state house speaker Richard Corcoran.

The framed telegram sends a clear message to those of us who like to visit museums in the United States. In this country we are trained to value modernism for innovation. We seek out paintings because a textbook or magazine tells us they are important. We want to gaze upon the original before buying the poster, postcard, or t-shirt in the gift shop.

In Germany, a country scarred by its recent fascist past, one is reminded that decisions about culture and art carry a political charge.

Four hours east, in the capital city of Berlin, an understated monument recognizes book burnings from the early days of the regime. Weeks after Paul Klee got fired, on May 10, propaganda minister Joseph Goebbels railed before a crowd of 40,000 in Berlin’s Opera Square against “decadence and moral corruption.” Students torched foreign, “degenerate,” and as you would guess, Jewishauthored books. A monument rests there today in the middle of Opera Square. People gather around a simple pane of glass in the cobblestone, looking onto empty library shelves below.

We carry vivid memories of the German war machine, the Chaplinesque madman, the

The board will target tenure next, not stopping until they have transformed a perfectly functional, artsy-fartsy liberal arts school (the best undergraduate value in the state) into a conservative fringe think tank.

Up the road in northern Pinellas County, a math teacher at a private Christian academy has complained about books on the shelves at Palm Harbor University High. Students will have to go elsewhere to find Toni Morrison’s “The Bluest Eye,” Anthony Burgess’ “A Clockwork Orange,” and Kate Chopin’s feminist cri de cœur, “The Awakening.”

We know how it ended for the Nazis. The German people, to their credit, have openly marked every step in their fall to fascism. We cannot say, in the United States, that our incipient decline into public evil will have started with firing a college president or with pulling titles from Palm Harbor U. Who knows where the path of Ron DeSantis, Donald Trump, and other political extremists will lead? But we can say the story has started this way before. With culling books from Berlin libraries. Or a telegram, firing the professor of art.

Tell our leaders to stop.

Thomas Hallock is Professor of English at the University of South Florida St Petersburg.

THOMAS

HALLOCK

“Tell our leaders to stop.”

WINDOW TO THE PAST: Opera Square in Berlin.

Age of rage

The danger of the authoritarianism Trump heralded has not passed.

By Jeffrey C. Billman

The danger was never just Donald Trump. That’s not to say he wasn’t dangerous. Any far-right demagogue who achieves real power would be. But Trump is also an obvious buffoon too narcissistic to read the room or to get out of his own way. And as he shrinks into the background, an evershriller, ever-sadder voice begging for fealty from his own movement, the reality that he was the symptom, not the disease—an opportunist, not a catalyst—has become blindingly apparent.

Not here. The court—including the two new justices, who spent the previous year promising that their party wouldn’t influence their decisions—decided that they have the majority, so they’ll help their party engage in vote suppression if they want to.

INFORMED DISSENT

To anyone willing to remove their rose-tinted glasses, at least.

But our media and our country alike are only too happy to declare problems solved and move on. So after Trump’s slate of MAGA Senate candidates was wiped out in November, we collectively decided that the conspiratorial idiocy he seemed to have ushered in was on its way out, that normies were retaking the Republican Party, that the threats to democracy and the rule of law were subsiding. Peace in our time, and so on.

Of course, this admixture of naivete and willful ignorance can sustain neither scrutiny nor time. Seeds sown over decades have taken root, their toxic fruit ripening. Trump might be an absurd shadow pleading for relevance and dodging handcuffs. But the danger of the authoritarianism Trump heralded has not passed, and we can’t afford to be numb to the new forms it’s taken.

Let’s start with a disregard for norms. Last year, in two 4-3 decisions split along party lines, North Carolina’s Supreme Court ruled that extreme partisan gerrymandering and a voter ID law passed by the Republican legislature violated the state constitution.

In November, two Republicans were elected to the court, shifting its balance of power. And the second they were sworn in, Republicans in the legislature made an extraordinary request: They asked the court to rehear those cases, not because the facts or the law had changed, but because the court’s political composition had.

In other words, they wanted the court’s Republicans to dispense with any charade that their actions would be governed by anything other than partisan politics; precedent didn’t matter if the court didn’t like it. And all five Republicans agreed.

To be fair, supreme courts overturn precedents all the time. But there’s always an attempt at a legal rationale, even if it’s a thin reed, even if the result is obviously ideological. (See, e.g., Justice Alito’s screed overturning the right to abortion.)

The precedent they set is that no precedent matters, and no one should imagine otherwise.

In one sense, that might not be a bad thing: If courts are going to be overtly political institutions at the beck and call of their party masters, let’s not pretend they’re anything else.

But in another, it sends a perilous message: If you don’t like a law passed by another faction, it’s illegitimate. Healthy democracies can’t function that way.

That’s the same logic that drove Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis’ decision to remove Tampa’s district attorney last year, a blatantly unconstitutional exercise of executive power to negate

the views of voters DeSantis didn’t like and substitute his own.

DeSantis has become especially brazen in employing what is probably the most disturbing form that this post-Trump authoritarianism has taken. In his budding troll campaign for president—see, e.g., his tax exemption for gas stoves, things I don’t recall seeing in the 30 years I lived in South and Central Florida—he’s found an enemy to rally his troops against.

Several enemies, actually, all neatly packaged under whatever he defines as “woke” today.

Drag queens. Transgender kids. Black history. Books.

Last week, the DeSantis administration moved to revoke the liquor license of the Orlando Philharmonic Plaza Foundation because a property it owns hosted a campy, all-ages drag show that, in DeSantis’ mind, corrupted The Kids (at least, the three children the state documented attending the show) by subjecting them to dirty lyric changes in Christmas songs (definitely wouldn’t zoom over a kid’s head), performers whose outfits didn’t cover their whole asses (scandalous), and an image of a finger pointing through a holiday wreath

(a six-year-old would absolutely be traumatized by that innuendo!).

This is, naturally, from the same guy who can’t shut his mouth about the rights of parents to choose what’s best for their children—and it’s not like anyone who went to that drag show didn’t know what they were getting—while at the same time demanding to know teenage girls’ menstrual cycles.

But this has nothing to do with actual children being corrupted or the strip-club laws the state alleges the drag show broke.

DeSantis wants people to be mad at drag queens.

Just like he wants them pissed off at teachers and librarians and universities. Guys like DeSantis have nothing to offer but rage. Rage needs a target. It needs a sense of aggrievement, of victimhood, of entitlement. It makes people feel better about themselves by blaming someone else for their life’s frustrations—and, in this case, justifying it as saving the children. But it’s never been about that. It’s just bullying as politics.

It infected the right long before Trump arrived. Purging him hasn’t gotten rid of it.

THE PURGE: Trump is shrinking, but his influence has not.

JOYCE N. BOGHOSIAN

“Seeds sown over decades have taken root, their toxic fruit ripening.”

Shit Happened

THURSDAY 02

A day after he retires for good, Creative Loafing Tampa Bay finds out that you, too, can live in Tom Brady’s Davis Islands rental for just $60,000 a month. He really was just one of us, huh?

FRIDAY 03

TUESDAY 07

CL obtains a message detailing four new newsroom layoffs at the Tampa Bay Times. Not good. Nope, not ever. Support your local news publications, folks.

MONDAY 06

A federal judge rules against DeSantis’ request for minors to undergo “mental examinations” in transgender coverage lawsuit. I still can’t believe this guy is being floated for president.

Pups Pub Tampa is challenging Florida’s Department of Health over its decision to block dogs from being in the establishment. I mean, if people wanna get fucked up with their dogs, why stop them?

THURSDAY 09

Joe Biden comes to Tampa, proving that he’s not just a creepy old guy who wants to “check out” Gasparilla.

More shit, trolling its FJB friends, via cltampa.com/news.

RAY ROA

PUPSPUB/FACEBOOK

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Champagne supernova

Chef Melissa ‘Melly’ Gardner previews her new Seminole Heights bar and restaurant.

By Kyla Fields

Chef Melissa “Melly” Gardner is no stranger to the Tampa Bay food scene. In fact, her name alone should induce hunger pangs and visions of the fried catfish, lamb chops and cheesy grits that her Three Generations food truck is known for. But this week marks the beginning of a completely new era for Gardner and her business partner Brandi Gergle, as they get ready to open their first bar and restaurant, Coasis. Gardner’s debut brick and mortar will open out of the former London Heights British Pub in Seminole Heights, but it’s been rendered unrecognizable by renovations and brightly-colored decor.

The new bar and restaurant will be neighbors with other Seminole Heights institutions like Three Coins Diner and Gangchu, although Coasis is just a stone’s throw away from Sulphur Springs, too.

The bar, restaurant and late night hotspot celebrated its soft opening last weekend and will host an exclusive Valentine’s night dinner, then grand opening party on Saturday, Feb. 25. More information can be found on Coasis’ social media pages (@coasistampa on Instagram and Facebook), where you’ll also see sneak peeks of its pink and purple accented decor and gold-plated private dining room.

“We’ve watched a lot of restaurants open in Seminole Heights, but none to this magnitude… we honestly want to take over the entire block,” Gardner says. “We’re bringing the energy of downtown Tampa and Ybor City to Seminole Heights.”

When Coasis celebrates its grand opening in a few weeks, customers can expect extravagant weekend brunch fare paired with a modern steakhouse menu. Appetizers include chargrilled oysters and ceviche with mango puree, while entrees range from filets and massive tomahawk steaks to surf and turf, whole snapper, and freshly made pastas. Coasis will offer a full spread of beer, wine, bubbly and craft cocktails to match its decadent food menu.

OPENINGS

Coasis’ Valentine’s dinner

Tuesday, Feb. 14 7701 N Nebraska Ave., Tampa @coasistampa on Instagram

While Gardner’s massive, 4,000 square-foot space seats about 160 patrons, she doesn’t think they’ll have a problem filling out the dining room (or its wraparound porch). And although Gardner has a sizable foodie following from Tampa Bay and beyond, Coasis is a joint venture with her girlfriend, business partner and beauty entrepreneur Brandi Gergle. Known for her local salons and international wig business B Blaze Hair Boutique, Gergle is the mind behind Coasis’ sleek decor, while Gardner helms its kitchen alongside Executive Chef Kendall Ivy. Social media pages for Gergle’s businesses and the Three Generations food truck have collectively garnered over 100,000 followers. Needless to say, neither Gardner or Gergle have any issues appealing to their audience—whether it consists of foodies, influencers or anyone else in between.

And on the weekends, Coasis will host what Gardner describes as the be-all and end-all of brunches. Gardner says her brunch menu at Three Generations helped put her on the culinary map, and Coasis’ offerings will certainly do her reputation justice. Pound cake french toast with salted caramel whipped cream, surf and turf deviled eggs, soft shell crab toasts and grilled caesar salads are just a few of the dishes that will be offered on Saturdays before dinner service and all-day Sundays. On the weekends, the new bar and restaurant will also offer a latenight small plate menu of lamb chops, crudo, oxtail empanadas, marinated olives, chicken wings and crab-stuffed shrimp.

Gardner has known Ivy, Coasis’ executive chef, for a decade, since the two worked at St. Pete’s now-closed Farm Table Cucina together. He recently relocated to Tampa from Los Angeles for the opportunity to helm this kitchen. She says that having an executive chef will allow her to take the apron off from time to time, interact with her customers more, and continue to grow as a business owner. Her first endeavor, Three Generations food truck, debuted in the summer 2018 to almost an instantaneous following— and her lines still continue to wrap around the block. After a few successful years slinging her Southern comfort fare, the debut of a second food truck, and a brief stint inside St. Pete’s

22 South Food Hall, Gardner initially thought that her first standalone restaurant would be an extension of the Three Generations brand. But she wanted something bigger—a business that reflected both her and Gergle. “I love my street food people, but I know my audience wanted something more at the same time. They wanted elevated food in a nice atmosphere,” Gardner says. Notably, the power couple was able to purchase their Seminole Heights restaurant space last year. It was already wet zoned for alcohol consumption, but Gergle and Gardner put about eight months of remodeling into it.

“I have to brag on her a little bit because it was totally her idea to buy a restaurant space,” Gardner says about her life and business partner. “I’ve looked to rent for so long, but it’s because of Brandi’s entrepreneurial success that we were able to buy our amazing building.” Now, their patrons can sip on craft cocktails like “Cracks Kills”—complete with black rum and pineapple juice—or lavender gin martinis throughout its glossy dining room, its 100-seat porch or outdoor “oasis” under the trees.

Gardner draws a parallel between Coasis and her friend Khalilaa McDuffie’s restaurant 7th + Grove, as both establishments pride themselves on great food and cocktails, a lounge-like vibe and the ability to cater to both the LGBTQ+ and straight crowds. She names other friends and peers like Sarah Fludd from Pop Goes

the Waffle and Chef Ashley Suttle from Main Course, stressing the importance of supporting Tampa Bay’s other Black restaurateurs. Unfortunately, both Fludd and Suttle’s brick and mortars recently closed, but Gardner is thankful that she was able to purchase a majority of Main Course’s kitchen equipment to use for Coasis.

When asked if she had any advice for folks who would like to follow in her entrepreneurial footsteps, she paused before answering.

“You know what— this is what I tell my friends. As Black businesses, we don’t have to cook just Black food. It’s easy to limit yourself to soul food because it’s familiar, but there’s so much more out there,” Gardner explains. “Choose your location wisely, be a chameleon, and make sure to create a menu for all people.”

Gardner, who earned a software engineering degree before launching Three Generations, also says that knowing how to utilize social media is another vital factor in running a successful business.

Gardner says that her bar and restaurant will open around 11:30 a.m. daily and offer latenight hours on Friday and Saturday nights, although they could change as it transitions out of the soft opening phase.

The restaurant is currently hiring chefs, servers, bartenders, and hosts; folks interested in these positions can send their information to coasisinfo@gmail.com.

POWER COUPLE: Gardner (R) and Gergle are the co-owners of Coasis.

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Love bites

All the best Valentine’s Day dinners and events throughout Tampa Bay.

By Kyla Fields

Whether you actually believe in the romance of Valentine’s Day doesn’t really matter, chances are your partner wants to do something anyway. From pre-fixe dinners and wine pairings to shareable specials for two, here’s a list Valentine’s dinners and events throughout Tampa Bay you can hit up with your loved one(s)—and don’t forget to make those reservations.

A few of our favorite non-dinner V-day events include the Tampa Theatre’s massive vow renewal and a romantic candlelight concert at Ybor City’s Centro Asturiano de Tampa.

Email kyla@cltampa.com to tell us about your specials; see an updated version of this listing via cltampa.com.

Forbici The star of Forbici’s holiday offerings is sampling of unique dessert pizzas, with flavors like pistachio truffle butter with dried apricots and milk chocolate with fresh strawberries and white chocolate. And if you don’t have a sweet tooth, there’s still a variety of Italian classics to choose from. 1602 W Snow Ave., Tampa. eatforbici.com

DINING GUIDE

Haven Bern’s steak house’s little brother will offer a tasting menu of scallop crudo, marinated beets, Wagyu tartare and miso-glazed ribs, alongside several other dishes and wine pairing options. Its regular dinner menu or happy hour specials won’t be offered during this exclusive dinner. $105. 2208 W Morrison Ave, Tampa. havehaventampa.com

Acropolis This romantic holiday dinner features a three-course spread accompanied by live music and unique pairings of wine from select regions of Greece, Lebanon and Argentina. $90. 3023 W. Kennedy Blvd., Tampa. eventbrite.com

Boulon Brasserie Fresh off of its grand opening, this new restaurant celebrates its first holiday with a special shareable steak entree for two and decadent dessert specials, in addition to its daily menu. 1001 Water St., Tampa. boulontampa.com

Ciro’s Speakeasy This classic hidden bar might be known for its craft cocktails, but its pre-fixe Valentine’s dinner—complete with duck confit and grilled mahi-mahi—might bolster its reputation as a great restaurant, too. $110. 2109 Bayshore Blvd., Tampa. cirostampa.com

Common Dialect Enjoy a laid back beer and cheese pairing at this newly-opened Seminole Heights brewery, where you can also learn about the cheese making and brewing process. $45. 5023 N Florida Ave., Tampa. commondialectbeer.com

Epicurean Hotel In addition to Élevage SoHo Kitchen & Bar’s regular weekday menu, the swanky restaurant will offer different Valentine’s Day specials, like baked brie with gooseberry marmalade, horseradish-crusted sturgeon and a 20-ounce dry-aged Delmonico steak for two. 5 p.m.-10 p.m. 1207 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. epicureanhotel.com

Fenway Hotel This Dunedin favorite offers a four course pre-fixe menu, where guests can choose a main entree of pistachio and apricotstuffed pheasant or a six-ounce filet and Maine lobster claw. $95. 453 Edgewater Dr., Dunedin. fenwayhotel.com

Flor Fina This Ybor City hotel restaurant at Hotel Haya offers a pre-fixe menu of raw oysters, decadent risotto, and your choice of seared scallops, herb-crusted lamb rack or charred butternut squash. $85-$125.1412 E 7th Ave., Ybor City. hotelhaya.com

Intermezzo Coffee & Cocktails Brazilian songwriter Daniela Soledade will serenade the intimate crowd at Intermezzo’s Valentine’s Day party, where lovers can sip on some wine or craft cocktails. 1111 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. intermezzo.co

The Karol Hotel Lovebirds can enjoy a pre-fixe dinner at the waterfront K Club Bar

M Bird Besides its tasty waterfront views, this rooftop bar offers a variety of food and drink specials, which include grilled lamb chops and passion fruit crème brûlée. 1903 Market St., Tampa. mbirdtampa.com

Ocean Hai Clearwater’s popular hotel restaurant typically dishes out Asian fusion cuisine, but its pre-fixe holiday dinner offers more modern American fare, like lobster risotto and demi-glazed steak. $95. 100 Coronado Dr., Clearwater Beach. oceanhaiclearwater.com

Pinellas Ale Works Far from fancy white tablecloth dinners, this brewery is celebrating V-day with a doggy kissing booth, local vendors, live music, pub grub and great beer. 1962 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg. pawbeer.com

Ponte Modern American This newlyopened fine dining restaurant kicks off its debut holiday with its regular offerings, alongside an exclusive pre-fixe menu. $175. 1010 Gramercy Ln., Tampa. pontetampa.com

Red Mesa Cantina The restaurant’s threecourse, pre-fixe dinner will be accompanied by live music and an open bar. $145. 128 3rd St. S, St. Petersburg. redmesacantina.com

The Restorative This limited-seating Dunedin gem is offering an exclusive tasting menu of lobster bisque with scallops, filet mignon with mushrooms, parsnips and pick-

Sal Y Mar A glossy, pre-fixe Valentine’s dinner—which includes a bottle of fancy champagne—also offers some of the best rooftop views of downtown Tampa and I-275. $250. 3650 Midtown Dr., Tampa. salymarrooftop.com

Steelbach You can enjoy the restaurant’s Southern-inspired menu or its one-night-only holiday menu of fontina-stuffed arancini, clam linguine and porcini-rubbed ribeye. Lots of people watching, too, at Armature Works in Tampa Heights. 1902 N Ola Ave., Tampa. steelbach.com

Tampa Edition This newly-opened five-star hotel offers a swanky holiday dining experience, with both of its signature restaurants—Lilac and Azure—offering luxurious pre-fixe dinners. And your date will be just as impressed with the Market concept downstairs. $125-$175. 500 Channelside Dr., Tampa. editionhotels.com

TradeWinds Island Resorts Two of the resort’s restaurants will offer special V-day menus for you and your loved one; Palm Court Italian Grill features a few dinner specials while the RumFish Grill has a four course dinner for $95. 5500 Gulf Blvd., St. Pete Beach. tradewindsresort.com

& Bistro, which offers its modern Americaninspired appetizers, entree and a decadent red velvet cake for dessert. $75. 2675 Ulmerton Rd., Clearwater. thekarolhotel.com

La Sétima Ybor City’s newly-opened natty wine bar offers a completely vegan Valentine’s meal, complete with four courses and optional wine pairings. $75. 815 E 7th Ave., Ybor City. lasetimaclub.com

led shallots and white chocolate mousse with chocolate ganache, raspberry and coconut for dessert. $115. 420 Patricia Ave., Dunedin. restorativerestaurant.com

Rusty Pelican Tasting menu, a complimentary champagne, shared seafood platter and choice of lobster and shrimp risotto, filet, salmon, roasted half chicken. $90. 2425 N Rocky Point Dr., Tampa. therustypelicantampa.com

Willa’s Join the “Willa’s Love Club” by partaking in its exclusive V-day menu, which includes chicken schnitzel frites and chocolate covered strawberries, in addition to craft cocktails like the “Love Me or Leave Me”—complete with tequila, hellfire bitters, lime, pomegranate and hibiscus. $65. 1700 W Fig St., Tampa. willastampa.com

Yacht StarShip You can go on this romantic lunchtime cruise during the day and still make your dinnertime reservations. Enjoy a three-course lunch, DJ and entertainment, and beautiful waterfront views. $89.95 – $129.95. 603 Channelside Dr., Tampa. yachtstarship.com

HAYA THERE: Ybor City's Flor Fina at Hotel Haya has a pre-fixe menu for yourvalentine.

Take a number

25 hard-to-get restaurant tables that are always worth the wait.

By Tyana Rodgers

There’s busy restaurants, and there’s ones that seem to always be slammed. Tampa Bay has a thriving restaurant scene and some of our local favs have the crowds to prove it. From highend dining, to comfort food and neighborhood dives, here are a few of our favorite local haunts where you’ll almost never eat alone. Remember, it doesn’t hurt to call ahead!

Allelo An upscale Mediterranean restaurant with a plates-meant-to-be-shared philosophy has a packed menu with influences from the Aegean Sea. Dishes like grilled octopus, East Coast oysters, smoked fish spread, and build-your-own charcuterie spreads are some of the highlights. On the drink menu there will be a variety of wines from both the U.S. and regions surrounding the Mediterranean and craft cocktails. There’s plenty of people watching to be had on Beach Drive while you wait. 300 Beach Dr. NE No. 128, St. Petersburg, (727) 851-9582. allelostpete.com

DINING GUIDE

Bern’s Steakhouse One of the most notorious steak houses in Florida, Bern’s is a household name in Tampa, and it has arguably the longest wait for a table. Founded in 1965, Bern’s is the home to a carefully curated selection of prime steaks, including dry aged selection, and the largest private wine collections in the world. Diners, be sure to dress your best, and don’t skip the dessert room, which offers selections like peanut butter truffles, tiramisu and bananas foster. Try making a resy for Valentuine’s Day 2024. 1208 S Howard Ave., Tampa, (813) 251-2421. bernssteakhouse.com

Bin6South An intimate tasting bar and wine cellar with extravagant and colorful small plates from chefs Freddie Gentile and David Canady. There is a rotating seasonal menu, with fun takes on braised chicken ravioli with basil and fennel brulee and white wine sauce and beef tri tip. 330 6th St. S, St. Petersburg, (727) 498-6735. bin6south.com

Boulon Brasserie A brand spankin’ new innovative dining experience within downtown Tampa’s Water Street development. Featuring modern interpretations of French classics, the menu spans breakfast, lunch and dinner, and features seafood-inspired dishes like lobster pot pie, cornmeal fried oysters, and scallop risotto. The space includes a restaurant, cafe, and a full bar. Take a look at the craft cocktail menu, which features speciality drinks like the Tour De France, a blend of banana liqueur, fennel shrub, hard cider, and calvados. 1001 Water St., Tampa, (813) 768-9988. boulontampa.com

Edison: Food+Drink Lab Acclaimed chef Jeannie Pierola’s Industrial gastropub sells inventive American plates inspired by the chef’s experiments. Dishes like cracker-fried red snapper with smoked cheddar grits and sugar snap tomato bacon salsa and sushi with foie gras are just examples of what to find on the inventive menu. You’re going to want to RSVP for this spot. But if you ignore this advice and just pop in, then at last head to the bar while you wait, and make it an Edison’s signature cocktail, which features fire from Lima a cilantro-infused Fontana Pisco, lime juice, jalapeño simple syrup, and egg whites. 912 W Kennedy Blvd., Tampa, (813) 254-7111. edison-tampa.com

Ella’s Americana Folk Art Cafe In the heart of Seminole Heights, Ella’s is a Sunday brunch institution, and comes with a full American comfort menu, including favorites like the Seminole Heights Strong, a pan seared, butter basted chicken breast stuffed with parmesan, mushroom & garlic confit, served with fettuccini alfredo and the classic Good Burger, a veggie burger with sweet mustard, guacamole, lettuce, tomato & fried onions. The expansive bar includes craft and barrel aged cocktails, a collection of over 100 rare and small batch bourbons, and locally sourced craft and classic beers. 5119 N Nebraska Ave., Tampa, (813) 234-1000. ellasfolkartcafe.com

Esposito’s Italian Restaurant And Bar

You know it’s a legit Italian restaurant when just about everyone here is Italian, and there’s a line out the door. Evening crowds at Esposito’s can stack up early, and for good reason. Pull up to the bar and grab a drink while you wait and peep the menu, which has plenty of “buono” picks, like veal chop varsalona, parmigiana, and scallops sambuca. 14306 N Dale Mabry Hwy., Tampa, (813) 769-9098. espositositaliantampa.com

Forbici Modern Italian In Hyde Park Village, executive Chef Jason Saldutti, serves Roman-style pie varieties, Italian tapas, salads, continued on page 35

MY BOU: You’re gonna get some after dinner at Boulon Brasserie. ROCKAWAY PR

continued from page 31

grain bowls, and entrees to provide a modern interpretation of traditional Italian dishes. Guests can choose between either a 24-inch Teglia or 12-inch Tonda pizza with a variety of toppings. On the drink menu craft brews, cocktails and wines on tap, are the highlights. The boulevard outside provides plenty to keep your eyes occupied while you wait for a table. 1633 W Snow Ave., Tampa, (813) 251-8001. eatforbici.com

Good Intentions The folks behind Tampa Bay’s vegan hotspots Black Radish Grocer, Golden Dinosaur and Nah Dogs created Good Intentions which is a restaurant and cocktail lounge for plant-based dining. The menu features vegan options like seasonal gnocchi, and the devilish crab balls made with hearts of palm and jackfruit. The drink menu has alcoholic and nonalcoholic options such as 16 Dances that’s curated with watermelon-infused tequila, basil syrup, Ancho Reyes liqueur and lime and kombucha. 1900 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg, (727) 280-6068. goodintentionsfl.com

The Helm: Provisions & Coastal Fare

The perfect place to unwind by the beach and enjoy their abundant seafood selections. There is a raw bar where diners can indulge in a variety of oysters as well as clams, crab Louie and a shrimp cocktail. Grab a crafted drink like a The Loose Cannon which is tequila, St Germain and lime at the bar and enjoy the St. Pete beach breeze. 7736 Blind Pass Rd., St Pete Beach, (727) 363-4356. helmtampabay.com

as well as appetizer-style shareable plates, ramen bowls, grilled dishes and desserts. Diners can expect high quality selections such as bluefin tuna otoro, hokkaido scallops, and uni. There is also an extensive Japanese whiskey selection and signature cocktails which include the Hibiscus 75, a blend of Roku gin, hibiscus syrup, lemon and sparkling wine. Frank Anderson, Noble Rice’s executive chef, was most recently the creative culinary director at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino. 615 Channelside Dr. No. 12, Tampa, (813) 542-2021. noblericeco.com

On Swann Hyde Park Village’s On Swann is led by well known Chef Chris Ponte, and features a contemporary American menu highlighting lamb meatballs, steak frites and short rib. The bar menu includes an impressively large and creative array of craft cocktails. Try the Spring Awakening, which comes with a blend of peach & honeysuckle infused Brooklyn gin, white jasmine, sage, vanilla essence and lemon. 1501 W Swann Ave., Tampa, (813) 251-0110. onswann.com

cocktails like Flowers in Paris crafted with tequila, fresh lime juice, hibiscus-rose simple syrup, prosecco and is garnished with a vibrant edible flower. 3405 34th St. N, St. Petersburg, (727) 346-5242. roamsteakhouse.com

Rooster & The Till A 72-seat, award-winning establishment with an always-evolving menu and wine list, Rooster & The Till is perfect for adventurous diners looking to be challenged by new flavors. The menu contains elements from countless regions including Southeast Asia, Latin America and the Levant. Led by 2018 James Beard semi-finalist Chef Ferrell Alvarez and his longtime business partner and friend, Ty Rodriguez. One of the highlights at this concept is the six-course tasting menu, featuring halibut cheeks, wagyu

Sushi Sho Rexley Sushi master Rexley Kwok and sake expert Arte Kwok’s restaurant offers an unforgettable Japanese omakase, or a chef’s choice tasting experience. There are two experiences available, the nigiri omakase and the signature omakase. The Nigiri experience includes one appetizer, four pieces of seasonal fish sashimi, 11 pieces of seasonal Nigiri and eel and Tamago as dessert. Beer, wines and whiskey are also up for grabs on the menu. 214 2nd St. N, St. Petersburg, (727) 835-8478. rexleysushi.com

Trips’ Diner A classic neighborhood restaurant that not only comes with a built-in crowd waiting outside on the sidewalk, it also offers a variety of greasy spoon favorites. All-day breakfast is the main event here, but besides breaky, salads, sandwiches, meatloaf, pasta, chicken and more can be found on the menu. Be sure to get the cheese grits if Mr. Lawrence is there making them. 6416 N Florida Ave., Tampa, (813) 533-1900. tripsdiner.com

DINING GUIDE

Koya An intimate eight-seat tasting-menu-only experience by the folks behind Noble Rice. Diners can expect seven to nine courses including raw and cooked dishes, featuring luxuries like bluefin tuna and uni that are flown in weekly from a market in Kagoshima, Japan. Plan to be there for at least two hours. 807 W Platt St., Tampa, (813) 284-7423. koyatampa.com

Lilac This new Mediterranean restaurant is on the ground floor of The Tampa Edition hotel, and helmed by Michelin-starred chef John Fraser. A menu highlight is the four-course prix fixe dinner, which highlights vegetableforward selections like Handmade Herb Fusilli and Tuna Tartare Mont Blanc and more. Dress your best, because this intimate dining room is not for slouches. 500 Channelside Dr., Tampa, (813) 771-8022. editionhotels.com

Lingr Top Chef star Jeffery Jew’s Lingr, is an upscale-casual eatery, combining the flavors of Nordic and Asian influences. Two of the restaurants top dishes are the mapo ho fun, which is a play on mapo tofu and the wok-fried snapper, which features a filet dusted in potato starch and flash-fried, served on a bed of rice with crispy fan jiu. 400 6th St. S, St. Petersburg, (727) 471-6120. lingrrestaurant.com

Noble Rice This modern Japanese restaurant that recently opened a new location in Sparkman Wharf features a menu with nigiri and sashimi,

Ponte Modern American Ponte’s new Midtown restaurant features modern American cuisine with French and Italian influences. The menu has a variety of steak and seafood options like Chilean sea bass, New Bedford scallops, Denver steak Wagyu and Kansas City bonein. Ponte also owns the sleek Italian restaurant Olivia and New American concept On Swann. 1010 Gramercy Ln., Tampa, (813) 5827755. pontetampa.com

Red Mesa Cantina With Mexican cuisine at heart, Red Mesa Cantina blends Latin and Caribbean traditional flavors to create a menu full of ceviches, tacos, and small plate classics like Mahi A La Plancha and Anticuchos De Pollo. A favorite among St. Pete locals for not only the food but the scenic views from the courtyard and extensive tequila selections. A Diamond in the Rough crafted with Red Mesa exclusive Maestro Dobel Diamante Tequila, Giffard Pamplemousse, a touch of sugar, lemon juice, Malbec float is one of many enticing cocktails. 128 3rd St. S, St. Petersburg, (727) 896-8226. redmesacantina.com

Roam A fusion restaurant of French cooking and Ny steakhouse with a southern twist was curated by the duo behind Red’s BBQ. The seasonal and rotating menu is meat-forward with staples such as NY lobster mac and cheese, Cajun blackened strip steak, and New Zealand lamb chops served with a honey garlic sauce and citrus salad. The drink menu contains a wine and champagne program coupled with signature

striploin and mille-feuille. 6500 N Florida Ave., Tampa, (813) 374-8940. roosterandthetill.com

Steelbach Located in Armature Works, Steelbach is a modern steakhouse with a Southern drawl. The assortment of steaks is aged four to seven weeks, trimmed and cut to order, then cooked over 1000-degree oak and mesquite open fire grille. While known for the steaks the menu highlights other selections like, the crisp pork belly and catironed seared swordfish. The drink menu is loaded with selections from a huge whiskey bar and signature drinks such as La Septima made with Michter’s Rye, Bacardi 8, Alvear Pedro Ximenez Solera 1927, Cynar, Angostura Bitters. 1902 N Ola Ave., Tampa, (813) 693-5478. steelbach.com

Ulele Tampa Heights’ converted pumphouse focuses on native Florida ingredients and flavors, with visually appealing dishes. Prepared on a round 10-foot barbacoa grill, popular dishes like alligator hush puppies and tomahawk pork chops are local faves on the menu. Diners can soak up the scenic view of a natural spring while sipping on a drink from the in house brewery. 1810 N Highland Ave., Tampa, (813) 999-4952. ulele.com

Wild Child Vibrant neighborhood bistro and cocktail bar Wild Child made its big debut in 2020 and is a partner project of The Bends owner Matt Kaye and Rob Reinsmith, former executive chef at Noble Crust. Featuring indoor and outdoor seating, the concept serves up exotic cocktails, as well as a seasonal menu, spanning items like mushroom and kale paella, octopus al pastor, and more. 2710 Central Ave., St. Petersburg, (727) 954-7425. wildchildstpete.com

Yum Yum Hot Pot Make sure to have an empty stomach before you visit Yum Yum Hot Pot, an all-you-can eat Chinese restaurant with a pretty serious dinner rush. This place centers around a conveyor belt, which runs by every booth and ushers in the meal’s ingredients. There is a variety of beer and alcohol, including plum wine and sake, to wash your soup down with. At this unique experience you’re basically making your own dinner with ingredients you wouldn’t otherwise have access to in such abundance. With a wide variety of soups and toppings, sauces and meats, the possibilities are pretty much endless. 11301 N 56th St. Suite 6, Temple Terrace, (813) 986-9863. yumyumhotpottampa.com

BACH THAT THANG UP: Views are just the beginning at Tampa Armature Works favorite, Steelbach.

STEELBACHTAMPA/FACEBOOK

Rooster retires

Brian Lampe steps down from his Seminole Heights hotspot, and more foodie news.

By Kyla Fields

A highly-coveted position has recently opened up at one of Tampa Bay’s most recognized eateries, and both local and out-of-town chefs are encouraged to apply. Late last month, Seminole Heights’ Modern American restaurant Rooster & The Till announced that it’s looking for a new executive chef. A post from R&tT’s Instagram says the restaurant offers a fourday, in-house workweek, relocation assistance for out-of-town chefs, access to a wellness program, and profit share opportunities.

After years of working in R&tT’s awardwinning kitchen, Chef Brian Lampe “is retiring out of the kitchen,” according to the restaurant. Lampe previously worked as both a sous and catering chef for Mise en Place alongside chef Ferrell Alvarez before co-founding and opening Rooster & The Till in 2013.

In a phone call with Creative Loafing Tampa Bay, 45 year-old Lampe says that the decision to hang up his apron was a long time coming. Factors like stress, money, health and most importantly, wanting to spend more time with his wife and daughter, led him to step away from the kitchen for the first time in 25 years.

“As a leader in the kitchen, you have to put your staff and the restaurant first—and I enjoy doing that. But I’m getting older and I can physically feel the effects of being in the kitchen all day every day,” Lampe says. “My daughter is turning six in a week, and the major reason I’m doing this is because I want to spend more time with her. I’ve missed out on some big things over the years.”

He compares his life as a professional chef to the movie “Groundhog Day,” explaining that his life needed a massive, overhauling change. Lampe will helm the R&tT kitchen until March 4, before making the transition into his corporate position as a Tampa Bay sales representative for Gourmet Foods International.

“This current team at Rooster has been the most enjoyable group of people that I’ve had the pleasure of managing,” Lampe says. “They’re loyal, hard working and not only have my back, but they always have each other’s backs too.”

Chefs from both Tampa Bay and beyond can apply by sending their information to co-owner Alvarez (ferrell@properhousegroup.com), who

received a James Beard nomination for “Best Chef in the South” in 2017. Although Tampa Bay was snubbed on stars when the Michelin Guide made its Florida debut last year, Rooster & The Till did receive the prestigious Bib Gourmand accolade (alongside Ichicoro Ramen and Rocca) with Lampe as its executive chef.

After 32 years, Hyde Park Village’s Wine Exchange will be forced to move

A South Tampa institution faces an “uncertain future” at its flagship location. According to a press release, the owners of Hyde Park Village, Boston-based WS Development, have decided to not renew the lease of The Wine Exchange,

to keep our extraordinary staff together and find a new location in South Tampa to continue the legacy of The Wine Exchange.”

Smith tells CL that he initially signed a 10-year lease with the option to add an additional five years. Knowing that the business was approaching its 15 year mark, he had spent the last few years asking for another extension—a request that was recently denied. Wine Exchange’s last day at 1609 W Snow Ave in Hyde Park Village is Friday, March 31.

A Tampa Bay Times article from last week states that the owners of Hyde Park Village have plans to replace Wine Exchange with an undisclosed retail store. A representative of WS

selection of wine and spirits, as well as its intimate bistro menu stacked with pastas, steaks, salads and other small plates.

Hyde Park Village, South Tampa’s culinary, retail and lifestyle hotspot, is currently home to popular restaurants like Forbici, Meat Market, On Swann, Timpano, Sur La Table, and many more. The popular district’s newest addition is a wine, champagne and cocktail bar called Bouzy, which will be joined by other upcoming concepts like Tampa’s second Sweetgreen and The Salty Donut.

Inaugural Tampa Bay Wine & Food Festival happens this spring

which has been there for 32 years. “It’s hard to imagine not being in our Hyde Park Village home especially because we are the oldest business in the Village and business has never been better”, Dr. Mark Smith— who owns Wine Exchange with Rick Drummond— said in the release.

He thanked the countless customers who’ve been loyal to his bar and restaurant over the years, stressing that he’s “making every effort

Development told the Times: “part of what makes Hyde Park Village so special is that it is ever evolving and we’re excited to bring forth the next chapter of what the community has been asking of us.”

The Wine Exchange, a concept inspired by European-style streetside cafes, debuted at Hyde Park Village in 1990, and moved a few storefronts away to its current location a couple years later. The bar and restaurant is known for its extensive

The multi-day Tampa Bay Wine & Food Festival runs from Wednesday-Saturday, April 12-15 and features a wide variety of sampling events and activities—from culinary competitions and demonstrations to wine tastings and exclusive dinners. The festival kicks off with an invite-only event called “An Evening at The Tampa Club” and continues the next day throughout Hyde Park, where folks can enjoy a variety of specialty prefixe dinners from restaurants like Meat Market, Forbici, Sur la Table and Timpano. Perhaps the most exciting facet of the inaugural festival is its “Chef Throwdown” competition on Friday, April 14 where over a dozen of Tampa Bay’s best chefs battle it out in front of a live audience. Attendees can sample their dishes, cast votes and live their best “Chopped” fantasy. There are a variety of ticketing options available on the festival’s Eventbrite page, where you can choose to access individual dinners, events, or an entire weekend of programming. Ticket prices range from $100-$250 to attend the festival’s various events.

The very first Tampa Bay Wine & Food Festival ends on a high note with its Grand Tasting event on April 15. This grand finale features craft cocktails, wine and unlimited samples from dozens of Tampa Bay’s hottest restaurants—although a full list of participating eateries has yet to be released. Live music will take over Curtis Hixon Park’s stage, while food and drink vendors are scattered throughout the scenic waterfront space.

“I’ve missed out on some big things over the years.”

SKYLER JUNE C/O ROOSTER & THE TILL

EXIT MUSIC: Chefs Brian Lampe (L) and Ferrell Alvarez (second from left) opened Rooster & the Till in 2013.

Five centuries of dream-inspired paintings from renowned artists, plus one imaginative dream experience.

Dead inside

12 things we loved, and 12 we hated, about our fling with the GOAT.

By Carter Brantley

It’s Valentine’s Day. You’re lounging around, wondering how it all went wrong, wondering how you got here. One moment, you were watching weird, sexual-tension-filled videos of Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski flirting with each other on the Bucs Twitter page, now you’re listening to podcasts about how Kyle Trask is going to be competing with Blaine Gabbert for the starting quarterback position next season.

Oh, how times have changed. It’s time for some classic, old-fashioned reminiscing about love lost. But to quote Alfred, Lord Tennyson (I thought it was Shakespeare, too), “Tis Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” Without further ado, here are 12 things I loved and 12 things I hated about Tom Brady’s time in a Bucs uniform.

I loved how he put together such wonderful fourth quarter comebacks

Whether it was against the Rams, the Jets, or

any other team in between, Tom Brady certainly had his fair share of spectacular final quarter comebacks throughout his career, and his time in Tampa Bay was no different. For whatever else you may say about the guy, he sure as hell could run a two-minute drill.

I hated how rents skyrocketed in Tampa Bay upon his arrival

throw 30 interceptions in a season, or having to sit through game after game of the Mike Glenons, the Josh Freemans, and the Josh McCowns of the world? It was quite a stark difference getting to watch a master of his craft like Tom Brady. OK, enough kissing his ass, moving on.

I hated how immobile he could be

SPORTS

OK, so maybe his arrival had no actual impact on rents in Tampa, but the fact that it’s gone up so much since he’s arrived seems like a weird coincidence. Hopefully when he leaves it’ll come back down to Earth, because I’m looking for a new apartment, and I would like to not have to sell a kidney in order to afford it.

I loved how he made watching the Bucs fun again

I hate to get so sentimental, but remember when we were having to watch Jameis Winston

I know he had those fun little scrambles where he picked up a first down and would jump up all full of energy, but Brady was in his 40s, and he wasn’t exactly the agile fellow from his youth. Not that Kyle Trask is any more of a speedster, but the departure of TB12 at least opens the door to the Bucs bringing in someone else with a bit more of an improvisational spirit.

I loved his post victory videos

Again, say what you will about the individual, but his social media team was on its shit. Those post-victory hype videos it posted were pretty dope, from the music selection to the aura to the overall general energy, it was all really fun. And he was doing it in a Bucs uniform!

I hated watching him throw his signature temper tantrums

Some call it competitive spirit. Some call it a fiery nature. Whatever you call it, the tablets that were thrown over the past few years cost the Bucs a few hundred bucks (no pun intended). And those tablets could be used for a variety of other, much more noble and helpful causes than helping a middle-aged quarterback see why he threw his second interception of the night.

I loved getting to see Rob Gronkowski in a Bucs uniform

Without Brady, we don’t get Gronk. And as goofy and weird and ridiculous as Rob Gronkowski is, it was truly a blast watching him do his stupid little “Gronk Spike” at Raymond James Stadium to the sounds of the crowd going nuts.

I hated how tickets to Bucs games became disgustingly expensive

Another cost of doing business, I suppose. But Bucs tickets were no longer the bargain they used to be, and there’s no argument to be made for the Bucs being able to sell out games with Kyle Trask under center. Brady brought the continued on page 42

continued from page 41

people, and more people means more expensive tickets.

I loved how he got to shatter the hopes of the Saints and Drew Brees one last time

Ah, memories. Devin White picking off the former Purdue Boilermaker. The Bucs taking a victory on the road from a division rival after going 0-2 against them in the regular season. Brady playing with Brees’ children after the game. It’s all such great fun.

I hated watching his press conferences while he was going through the divorce from the mother of his children

Talk about a sad thing. Brady looked like a ghost of his usual self towards the beginning of the year. He looked skinny, unhealthy, and tired. Not saying I felt bad for him; when given the choice between retiring and making close to $400 million for sitting around and talking about football while getting to spend more time with his family or getting railed by 300-plus pound defensive linemen on a weekly basis, he chose the latter—and that’s on him.

I loved watching him get confused about what down was just played

Ah, the source of many memes throughout that season, Brady thought it was third down in a mid-season matchup with the Chicago Bears that ended up a confusing loss. Luckily, that was the year the Bucs won the Super Bowl, so it didn’t end up mattering that much.

I hated the fact that he brought a bunch of Boston people to the Bucs fan base (even temporarily)

To (kind of) quote Nigel Powers from the third Austin Powers movie, “There are only two things I can’t stand in this world: People who are intolerant of other people’s cultures, and people from Boston.” OK, so I changed the last part of the quote, but the point rings true. Boston people suck. They’re rude, they’re obnoxious, and they’re probably reading this beaming with pride. No one likes you, I don’t care if Matt Damon and Ben Affleck made some awful movie about how being from Boston can be “cool.” They’re douchebags too.

I loved that plenty of ring-chasing veterans wanted to join (and stick around) the Bucs because of him

Leonard Fournette, Gronk, Logan Ryan, Keanu Neal, Akiem Hicks, Shaq Mason, Ryan Jensen (re-signing), and many others came to play in Tampa Bay because of that man Tom Brady. And thank goodness, because the Bucs certainly could have used the help.

I hated how he only brought the Bucs the single Super Bowl

This has less to do with Tom Brady and more to do with the Bucs organization as a whole, because one player doesn’t win or lose rings (no matter how much it sounds like I believe that), but it still is a bummer the Bucs couldn’t have brought it home last season. This season was a lost cause, I get it, but it would’ve been fun to see a pair of rings come out of this era.

I loved that he brought the Bucs a Super Bowl at all

Many people were comparing the 2020 Bucs to many other teams in the history of sport who bring in veterans way past their prime in a well-meaning, but ultimately ill-advised, attempt to win a ring. Nope. The Bucs actually did it.

contention at the moment. Brady was doing it with a Super Bowl contender.

I hated when he lost his head coach

Much has been discussed about whether or not the breakup with Bruce Arians was truly on Arians, if it was Brady expressing displeasure with BA, or a combination of all that. Regardless, it was clear that Arians’ impact on the team in the head coaching role was far greater than I think anyone anticipated.

I loved when he proved that it wasn’t all Bill Belichick

I understand no one really thinks that Bill Belichick was the sole reason for New England’s success all those years, but it was still nice to see Brady solidify

time. Throwing the Lombardi Trophy across the Hillsborough River? Sheesh, what a guy.

I hated the fact that he went out on such a sour note

Losing to the Cowboys in such embarrassing fashion at home in the playoffs might be the worst way to end your career. I get the Cowboys aren’t an awful team; on paper, they’re actually really good. But they’re the fucking Cowboys. They suck. They shouldn’t be doing that. It’s a huge bummer that it ended like that.

I loved that he got to be himself as a Buc Look, I get Belichick’s methods. You show up, you do your job, you don’t create any distractions. But you’ve gotta have some kind of fun while playing

I hated the fact that he seemed so tired of it all by the end

It can happen in any relationship; the fights become more frequent and longer, the passion just isn’t there, and in this past season for the Bucs, it seemed like Brady was just lacking in investment at some points. Granted, he was dealt some tough hands with injuries and such, but it was still really difficult to watch a Tom Brady-led offense put up the low scoring numbers that it did.

I loved how dominant he was despite his age

To have one of your best seasons at the crisp age of 44 is nothing short of remarkable and something we don’t see very often (if at all). The only other person showing the same signs of longevity is LeBron James in the NBA, and even he is doing it on a crappy team that is outside playoff

that line of thinking. Belichick still has yet to win a playoff game without Brady, and TB12 has a ring in the same timeframe. So, there ya go.

I hate that his contract creates such cap problems moving forward

This isn’t his fault; the Bucs are the ones who made the cap decisions with the voidable years and such. It just really sucks paying someone who isn’t on the roster anymore, and Brady will be one of many, but it hurts a bit more after a guy who brought a team so much is no longer in uniform. Just a tough reminder of what was, and now what is.

I loved his Super Bowl parade celebration

I mean, who didn’t? It’s going to be something that is spoken about in Tampa Bay lore for quite some

a stupid game, right? I mean, this isn’t rocket science, it’s not a medical profession, we all have to deal with boring, tight-ass shit all the time. Sports are a way to release from that. Luckily, Brady was able to show that far more in a Bucs uniform.

I hate that he left

It sucks that now the Bucs have to go back to the dark ages (and believe me, they’re going to be dark). I loved the fact that the Bucs were getting constant media coverage, nationally televised games, and TMZ thirst. That was all because of the GOAT. It’s an unfortunate thing that he had to retire, but hey, he’s only human. Some people need a break to go make close to $400 million working as a broadcaster.

Now someone find me $60,000 a month so I can rent his house on Davis Islands.

GRASS IS GREENER: I hated his divorce-era press conferences.

KYLE ZEDAKER/BUCCANEERS

“I loved that he got to be himself as a Buc.”

ON VIEW THROUGH MARCH 26

Auguste Rodin, The Shade, first modelled c. 1880, enlarged c. 1901, this cast 1969 (Musée Rodin 6/12), Bronze, Los Angeles County Museum of Art, Gift of B. Gerald Cantor Art Foundation, photo © Museum Associates/LACMA

This exhibition was organized by the Los Angeles County Museum of Art.

MARCH 4-5

FREE ADMISSION

The 53rd Raymond James Gasparilla Festival of the Arts – one of the top outdoor, juried fine arts shows in the United States – will once again inspire and unite us in 2023. We invite you to join us at the stunning Julian B. Lane Riverfront Park in downtown Tampa to experience the power of the arts.

• More than 250 artists

• Local Artists Spotlight

• Educational and interactive activities and displays

• Children’s activities

• The Showcase, celebrating the award-winning artists

• Local food and refreshing drinks

• Live music

Now what?

Quarterbacks and coordinators who might work for the Bucs.

By Carter Brantley

Well, apparently this time it’s “for good.” Tom Brady officially retired last week via video stating that he’s stepping away from the game. After the greatest career in NFL history, Brady will hang up his cleats and head to the booth to start cashing in on a massive 10-year, $375 million deal with FOX to become part of their broadcast team.

So, what does that mean for the Bucs? Well, they are now moving on to the really crappy part of this deal they made with the devil to get Brady here and surround him with veteran talent. They’ve got a boat load of dead salary cap space, no extra draft picks, and a lot of aging veterans. Tampa Bay is not a youthful group, and there are going to be some dark days with some hard decisions to be made, so buckle up.

out), but never say never. He’s still had some down games over the years and has been carried by arguably the most talented roster in football (if you don’t include the QB position). So maybe he wants to get a prove-it year before securing a longterm deal, and the Bucs aren’t an awful situation for another former Patriot.

SPORTS

Matt Ryan LOL, I know right? After watching him pick apart the Bucs for so many years, this would be really strange. Nonetheless, Matty Ice was a huge letdown in Indy, but he’s a veteran presence who can at the very least offer Kyle Trask some guidance in how to be an NFL QB. As far as actual play, he might be the least attractive option on this list, but he’ll likely be in the Bucs’ price range.

Five potential offensive coordinators

The Bucs fired offensive coordinator Byron Leftwich after one of the bigger letdowns of a season in Bucs history. That may sound like hyperbole for a team that made the playoffs, but looking at its record and how much of a disaster the playoff game was, “letdown” is not that big of a stretch. Now the Bucs need a new signal caller on the offensive side of the ball. With Nathaniel Hackett and Frank Reich hired elsewhere, here are three options that could work out pretty well.

coaching gig, an offensive coordinator position at a team that could be rebuilding might not be what he’s looking for anyways.

Joe Brady Yeah, his quick rise to the offensive coordinator role with the Panthers came to a crashing end this past year after some really unsuccessful work in Carolina, but maybe the Buffalo Bills quarterbacks coach could use a fresh start. With the GOAT gone, this Brady would probably be more willing to take on the challenge of coaching a less talented roster than some of the other candidates listed.

Any and everyone could be traded or cut since the front office will need to do its best to start building for the future. Or, maybe the Bucs just say screw it and trade for Aaron Rodgers or Lamar Jackson (they won’t), continue to use voidable years, and win this awful division a few more times. But more than likely, there’ll be some lean years ahead for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. At least this means ticket prices will hopefully go down, right?

Let’s have a look into the future of our Bucs life.

Five potential quarterbacks

Kyle Trask The most likely option, the former second rounder out of the University of Florida recorded his first NFL action in the regular season finale versus the Atlanta Falcons this past year. He was drafted for a reason, and it’s time for the Bucs to pull the trigger on giving him the keys for a season, even if only just to see what the team has.

Derek Carr Carr may very well end up traded elsewhere, and rightfully so. I’m of the opinion that he’s still got something to give an NFL team. But hey, instead of going for a full on rebuild, maybe the Bucs decide they’re still trying to contend for an awful division and make the playoffs again. Could be a lot worse. They could bring in…

Carson Wentz Oh God, the horror. Wentz hasn’t been a good QB for a few years now, and it’s long overdue for teams to give up on him as a starter. Assuming Washington cuts him, Wentz could be a very cheap option to bring in, even if just to spice up the competition with Kyle Trask. Witnessing this dude replace Tom Brady is a pretty steep drop off and worst-case scenario.

Jimmy Garoppolo Another year, another Jimmy G inclusion in the QB list. He had a really productive year this past season and might be too pricey for the Bucs (it’s weird to type that sentence

Kliff Kingsbury

A big swing at the former Arizona head coach, Kingsbury led the Cardinals to an excellent offensive year last season and dealt with a crap ton of injuries in his latest campaign. While my feelings about him as a head coach are, shall we say, a bit mixed, his capabilities as an offensive coordinator are perfectly evident. However, some are saying that after his tumultuous tenure in Arizona, Kingsbury might be looking to take some time off of coaching, and even if he was looking for a

Stump Mitchell Hey, the Bucs had the worst running game in the NFL, so who better to bring in than the run game coordinator partially responsible for the development of one of the best running backs in the NFL (Nick Chubb)? Known as the “running back whisperer,” Mitchell would be a great guy to bring in to revamp this offense, especially since the team might be going through a large amount of changes anyways. Plus, a run-first OC is right in Bucs head coach Todd Bowles’ wheelhouse.

MATT STARKEY/CLEVELAND BROWNS

“There’ll be some lean years ahead.”

RUN IT: ‘Running back whisperer’ Stump Mitchell could revamp the Bucs offense.

Nacho problem

Let somebody else cook this Sunday.

By Kyla Fields and Ray Roa

The big game is here (that’s the Super Bowl, for American football, people, on Sunday, Feb. 11), and there’s no shortage of food and drink options whether you’re going out or staying home. We squeezed in as many local spots offering specials or catering below. See an expanded listing at cltampa.com/food.

Acropolis The Super Bowl’s had its fair share of Greek champs (sup, Ted Karras III), and you can go Greek on game day with this restaurant chain’s staples (salad, wraps, sandos, spreads, entrees and even desserts) starting as low as $25. Various locations. acropolistaverna.com

MacDinton’s Irish Pub This South Tampa bar is offering a $57 food and drink package (complete with 25 wings and two beer pitchers) during Super Bowl Sunday, in addition to select $5.70 shots and domestic drafts. 405 S Howard Ave., Tampa. macdintons.com

BIG GAME

Park and Rec A downtown St. Pete bar crawl starts at Yard of Ale at 11 a.m. and ends at Park and Rec just before the national anthem starts. Free shots, food and drink specials, and sportsrelated chaos will ensue. Park and Rec’s sibling across the bridge in Tampa hosts a bar crawl and watch party, too. $10-$15. eventbrite.com

The Blind Goat annual cornhole tournament, in addition to a variety of food and drink deals. 4106 Henderson Blvd., Tampa. blindgoattampa.com

Cosmic Fish Coffee Shop & Kava Bar This watch party is for all of the sober folks out there. This booze-free event features wings, pizza, and a free kava shell when you present your ticket to Cosmic Fish’s staff. $20. 5944 34th St. N No. 20, St. Petersburg. cosmicfishkavabar.com

Dickey’s Barbecue

Pit The Dallas-based Texas BBQ chain has everything from wings, ribs and other barbeque meats, plus sides and sauces. There’s a 20% discount if you order online and use the code “SUPER20”. Various locations. dickeys.com

The Dog Bar On Sunday, this DTSP pooch playground hosts the Woofball Puppy Bowl (doggos must be eight months old or less to compete in the puppy round; adult dogs must be under 25 lbs). Expect the furballs to run around a fenced in football field stocked with toys and balls from 4 p.m. to kickoff. And sorry anti-vaxxers, but your dog must be up to date on all its shots. 200 Central Ave., 727-317-4968. dogbarstpete.com

Ferg’s This Central Avenue mainstay is a nobrainer when it comes to casual bars, and there’ll be a plethora of beer bucket and seltzer specials. You can even pre-order its beloved wings if you’re hosting your own watch party this weekend. 1320 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. fergssportsbar.com

Hattricks Downtown Tampa’s go-to sports bar offers happy hour specials every single day, in addition to dozens of flat screens to watch the big game on. Don’t be surprised to see a few tailgaters posted up outside. 107 S Franklin St., Tampa. hattrickstavern.com

Pour House This Channelside neighborhood pub hosts its 7th annual Super Bowl Chili Cook Off, with just 15 competitor spots available. 4 p.m., ($10 to enter, $20 to eat and vote). 1208 E Kennedy Blvd. no. 112, Tampa. pourhousetampa.com

Press Box South Tampa’s iconic, 45-yearold, sports bar is first-come-first-served on Super Bowl Sunday, and if you get in you’ll experience some of the finest sportsball watching in town. 222 S Dale Mabry Hwy., Tampa. pressboxsports.com

Salty Nun Enjoy live music from local band Callaboone, a variety of food and drink specials, and over a dozen TVs—including a 15 foot-long jumbo screen—to watch the big game on. 2501 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. saltynun.com

Santoro’s The Giants may be sitting the game out, but Tampa’s foremost purveyor of Jersey-style pizza pie (and damn good cheesesteaks with wiz) is offering catering orders of its ‘za, Buffalo wings, garlic knots and grinders. Santoro’s says the only way to guarantee getting its food on your table is to place your order with Holly Lenge (from Tom’s River) by Friday. 1329 W Cass St., Tampa. $40 & up. 813-609-7512. santorospizzeria.com

Top Shelf Sports Lounge This party features all-you-can-drink beer and wine, cheap liquor specials and a buffet chock full of top notch bar food, including dishes like wings, nachos and quesadillas. $60. 3173 Cypress Ridge Blvd., Wesley Chapel. topshelftampa.com

Taco Bus The late-night food mainstay offers chips, your choice of proteins on tacos, plus all the fixings (pico, queso, guac, sour cream, red and green salsa, etc.). Various locations. $10.99 & up. taco-bus.com

SANTOROSPIZZERIATPA/FACEBOOK

WINGIN’ IT: You have to get your Santoro’s order in by Friday, people.

Mr. Universe

Jim Gaffigan returns to Tampa to tape Netflix special.

By Josh Bradley

The nicest man in comedy has filmed Netflix standup specials in Minneapolis, Ontario, and Columbus, just to name a few locations. But despite constant appearances in Tampa Bay over the years, Jim Gaffigan—who says that he actually lived in town for a year after college— has never filmed in the Sunshine State. “[Tampa] has this great combo of city and also like, suburbs,” he told Creative Loafing Tampa during a phone call while his kids were getting haircuts.

The 56-year-old comedian—who’ll take three nights this weekend to film his next Netflix special during a series of shows at the Straz Center for the Performing Arts’ Morsani Hall—didn’t strive to be a comedian as a child, but he still enjoyed tuning into whatever George Carlin and David Letterman had to say, the latter of whom he would eventually get his big break from. “I really loved observational comedy when I started, but now, I’m very much into storytelling,” Gaffigan declared.

He takes a lot of pride in the fact that his material is one thing that people on both sides of the political aisle can agree on, which is what keeps him on the topic of certain aspects of his personal life, especially his family. “You want all the jokes to be as ripe as they can be. But you know, with five kids and just the chaos of life, every special has kind of been a unique challenge,” he explained.

One of his five children, Jack—his eldest son and second-born child—has actually tested the waters of stand-up, and opened for his father when he was on spring break last year.

INTERVIEW

Jim Gaffigan

“I want him to get good grades and all that. Stand-up is not the real world,” his father declared. “I want him to know that with stand-up, you peak at night. Stand-up, and the entertainment industry in general, is so weird. You have to have the appetite for rejection, so I don’t want to only show him the pretty sides of the industry.”

Thursday-Saturday, Feb. 9-11, 7 p.m. (plus 9:30 p.m. second show on Saturday). $29.75 & up

It’s doubtful that he’ll personally tackle both styles of comedy upon his arrival, but considering the amount of topics to, err, observe, in Florida—especially everything new that has come about since his last visit here in 2019—it’s really anyone’s guess how much wrath Tampa will be given. We might hear a thing or two about Tom Brady, but don’t expect any remarks that even loosely relate to Florida’s scarlet conservatism.

For years, Gaffigan’s public persona was staunchly anti-political. But in a series of tweets that emerged right after the 2020 Republican National Convention, he let out five years of anger by absolutely skewering Donald Trump—describing him as “a crook and a con man”—and condemning the usage of the word “socialist” to describe Democrats like Barack Obama and Joe Biden. Based on that and everything else he would tweet, it would surprise close to no one if he felt the way about Gov. Ron DeSantis as he does about El Trumpo. Nonetheless, he still manages to avoid bringing politics into his sets, but not for reasons relating to stirring the pot.

“I think that we are in this politically charged era, whether it’s political correctness, or even political divisiveness,” Gaffigan began, having been asked the hardest part about being a comedian in the 2020s. “So for me, I think my biggest problem is self-assignment, and also doing new stuff in a more challenging way.”

Speaking of industries with a pretty heavy dark side, Gaffigan— being the food comedian he is—is a huge fan of our local food scene, going back to when he lived here as a young adult.

“There was this place on the causeway connecting Tampa to Clearwater that was this Mexican fajitas place. It was unbelievable,” he recalled, unable to remember the name. “It was probably gone before you were even born.”

Gaffigan doesn’t go out after a show and reward himself by getting blackout hammered like some of his peers surely do, or did. “I’ll go to a restaurant. And if the timing is right, it’s usually ideal, but I’m not like a fine dining guy,” he explained, later proving his point by recalling the existence of Shells, a local seafood spot with four locations across Tampa Bay. Not that he likes seafood or anything, though.

Outside of his stand-up specials, Gaffigan is also no stranger to film crews. Just before COVID-19 vaccines came out, he was in Vancouver filming “Peter Pan & Wendy” for Disney+, which is set to release later this year. Even portraying the role of Mr. Smee—opposite Jude Law’s Captain Hook—humbled Gaffigan.

“When you’re on some Disney classic story like that, it’s pretty cool,” he said. “There’s not a person in the English speaking world that doesn’t matter who Peter Pan is.”

And of course, there was his short-lived, eponymous TV show that came to an end solely due to

him wanting to spend more time with his kids. He described the show as a bit “irresponsible” to do with so many kids around. “But there’s also the element of how it’s one thing to be autobiographical in a show, but if you’re doing an autobiographical thing about your relationship—meaning a husband and wife, or people with boyfriends and girlfriends—it gets a little complicated,” he explained. And once they get a little older, he would at the very least contemplate doing a third season. But that’s generally not really his style when it comes to proper film. “There are so many moving parts, and I really do love doing indie movies,” he admitted. “Stand-up really

gives me such a fulfilling experience on the comedy end, that when it comes to acting, I usually prefer to do something a little bit more dramatic, or maybe with a little deeper substance.”

Whatever that deeper substance is, you’ll have to wait a little longer to witness Jim take it on. But in the meantime, if you catch him at Morsani Hall at the Straz Center between Thursday and Saturday nights, maybe bring some sliders from Hooch and Hive up the road to the stage door for him to try after the show.

They sure as hell beat a Hot Pocket any day. Read our full Q&A via cltampa.com/arts.

SQUEEZE THE FRUIT: Despite how ripe Florida’s situation is, don’t expect Gaffigan to get political onstage.

ROBYN VON SWONK

Carol Morsani Hall at David A. Straz Center for the Performing Arts. 1010 N MacInnes Pl, Tampa strazcenter.org

“Stand-up is not the real world.”

HAPPY HOUR AT AMSO

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Dizz-y world

In ‘Brutes,’ beauty and insanity walk hand in hand.

By Caroline DeBruhl

The Florida in Dizz Tate’s debut novel, ”Brutes,” is not the happiest place on Earth.

There are gated communities, sure, and chances to get recruited as models. But there’s also arson, suicide, and creatures lurking in the lake. It is a feral and violent landscape, which works well for a coming-of-age novel.

The novel, told in the collective “we,” follows a group of 13-year-old girls who spend their time following around their slightly older schoolmate, Sammy. While the girls live in the apartment towers with their drunk mothers, Sammy lives across the lake in the walled-off community of Falls Landing. One morning, Sammy goes missing. All the adults start a frantic search asking, “Where is she?” Only the girls know where she is, and they keep this secret from the adults (and the reader).

BOOKS

Tate was born in London but moved to Florida at age nine and spent her tween and teen years in Orlando, a place that has influenced her fiction deeply: “There is something kind of beautiful about (Florida) and something kind of deranged about it,” she explained. “You can build a huge mansion, but then a sinkhole opens up under your bed while you sleep. It’s just so interesting. It’s a real kind of gift to grow up there and get to experience that.”

Brutes: A virtual conversation with Dizz Tate and Sarah Gerard

Next Thursday, Feb. 16, 6 p.m.

Free with purchase. tombolobooks.com

While these girls are loving and loyal, you shouldn’t mistake them for being kind. They’re the “brutes” in question: feeding baby birds to stray cats, watching a fellow kid nearly drown without offering help, and occasionally being cruel to one another just because they can. But Tate wanted to show this element of adolescence because, to her, it felt authentic:

“I think when you feel unloved, and you really want to be loved, it’s a dangerous combustible situation, and I don’t think it’s always expressed sweetly or kindly…it’s grabby, it’s needy, it’s sticky— it’s not pretty,” she told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay, “And that’s something I really remember as a 13-year-old.”

Beauty and insanity do walk hand in hand in this novel, from how the girls act to the situations they find themselves in. While I’m sure most eighth graders worldwide feel that dichotomy, ”Brutes” is undoubtedly a Floridian book. The whole atmosphere of the novel feels deeply Floridian, with its violent storms and blistering sidewalks, but there is a gauziness to it. Things are a bit vague. We never know what city we’re in or what mother belongs to which girl. Everything is a little dreamy—much like memory—which lets Tate explore some fantastical elements in the book.

“I wanted the external and the emotional reality to match,” Tate said. While Tate does stretch reality at times, she doesn’t break it. For some, this might still feel too weird. Parts of the book do stray from the realism path. But it works well. Both childhood and memory are filled with exaggerations; throw in the naturally surreal world of Central Florida, and you’re bound to get something strange.

POND HOPPER: Tate was born in London but moved to Florida at age nine.

SOPHIE DAVIDSON

“It’s a real kind of gift to grow up there…”

By Josh Bradley & Ray Roa C CL Recommends

THU 09

Stephen Kellogg Kellogg spent last summer with a band as it opened for Counting Crows, but does this show solo in support of a 2022 album, Keep It Up, Kid , that’s marked the dutiful introspection that’s been a hallmark of a discography that dates all the way back to 1994 (and includes six albums with the since-disbanded Sixers). (Music4Life Living Arts Center, Clearwater)

FRI 10

The Florida Orchestra: Soundwaves

TFO assistant conductor Chelsea Gallo wields the baton for this chamber concert inside a historic Episcopal church (rare for downtown Clearwater these days, we know!) that was built in 1925 and stands as an icon of Florida Gothic architecture, complete with stunning stained glass windows. A small ensemble—roughly 16 musicians playing strings, woodwinds, brass, harp and percussion—will take on a Julian Yu arrangement of Modest Mussorgsky’s 1874 piano suite “Pictures at an Exhibition,” plus one of Beethoven’s greatest hits, septet for “Winds and Strings in E-flat major.” (Church of the Ascension, Clearwater)

GreyMarket w/Idle Moves/Bangarang

Michael Gargiulo and Cave McCoy are so tight musically, they feel that it would be redundant to find other musicians to work with. The duo—inspired by Led Zeppelin and Muse, plus films like “2001: A Space Odyssey” and the “Star Wars” saga—is also entirely self-managed, meaning that the boys book their own tours and produce their own music. Much of it is done through a laptop, which’ll be onstage after sets from Idle Moves and Bangarang. (Music Hall at New World Brewery, Tampa)

The Harlem Gospel Travelers Of all the endangered American art forms, gospel perhaps most deserves fierce warriors to keep it alive. The Harlem Gospel Travelers have a new lineup, and new album, Look Up! , for their part of effort. The 11-track outing released last fall is still rooted in the genre’s golden age, but also moves into the ‘60s, ‘70s and even present day in weaving together a record that dips into so many strains gospel has influenced, including country, folk, rock, soul and blues. The group born out of the nonprofit music program Gospel For Teens found an expanded audience when its song “Fight On!” was featured in the trailer for the new Hulu docuseries “The 1619 Project,” and this weekend it stages what’s sure to be a memorable show under the Skipperdome, all in support of community radio station WMNF Tampa 88.5-FM. (Skipper’s Smokehouse, Tampa)

Fish Whether it was at Tampa Bay Blues Festival, or on an iteration of the all-star Experience Hendrix tour—one of the few musical experiences that hasn’t bounced back from COVID-19 yet—Kenny Wayne Shepherd never seems to pass up a visit to Tampa Bay when he’s on the road. He just released Trouble Is…25 in December, a reimagined version of his 1997 sophomore album. Shepherd’s current run of shows sees him get through the majority of the album, as well as salutes to Bob Dylan, Jimi Hendrix, and B.B. King. Samantha Fish—another frequent visitor to the Bay area—opens. (Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater)

Shaun Martin Miami’s GroundUp Music Festival wrapped last weekend, and Martin is sure to bring the good vibes to this listening room set. At GroundUp, the six-time Grammy-winning Snarky Puppy pianist collaborated with local high school students to record an original jazz album. Martin, a Dallas native, will likely tell stories about the experience, but mostly stick to the rhythm that’s earned him stints on the road with God’s Property and Kirk Franklin—where he’s the music director—plus The Weeknd, Erykah Badu and Chaka Khan. (The Attic at Rock Brothers Brewing, Ybor City)

Soulfly w/Bodybox/Half Heard

Voices Now that Max and Igor Cavalera no longer have Sepultura to worry about, both brothers have gone their own respective ways and continue to maintain success in the metal world. Max has been with Los Angeles-based metal outfit Soulfly ever since his departure from Sepultura in the late-‘90s. The group’s latest album Totem is its first since longtime guitarist Marc Rizzo announced his departure (he left mainly due to not seeing any money from a live album release) but with Bodybox and Half

Heard Voices also on the bill, you’d better bring earplugs with you when you jumpdafuckup at this one. (Orpheum, Tampa)

SydLive & Friends (album release) w/Pusha Preme/ABR/YZM & Milli

Moon/more If Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young planned to record a modern sequel to “Questions” before Crosby’s death last month, Tampa singer-songwriter SydLive beat them to it. An Instagram reel of her singing “What The Fuck Is Going On” in December is brief, but includes her wondering what got into Kanye West, and lamenting how graduation seems so far away. She closes out a headlining gig that celebrates the release of her new studio album with a barrage of local artists so different from one another, you’ll have no idea what the hell you’ll be in the mood to listen to on your way home. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa)

SAT 11

The Koffin Kats w/The Krank Daddies/ One Trip Little A decade ago, Kanye West and psychedelic rockabilly trio The Koffin Kats were in Tampatown the exact same weekend. Surely there are at least a few people who regret being in the same room as the controversial rapper (despite the opening act from some up-and-coming rapper named Kendrick Lamar), but this weekend, the Michigan rock trio—on the heels of celebrating its 20th anniversary this year—returns for the first time in two years to do a career retrospective. The guys will also likely throw in some new material, which according to a press kit, is due later this year. The Krank Daddies and One Trip Little open. And there’s no ‘ye in sight. (Orpheum, Tampa)

Kenny Wayne Shepherd w/Samantha

The Harlem Gospel Travelers

continued from page 53

Roger Daltrey w/Dan Bern The last time The Who’s Roger Daltrey took on a solo gig in Tampa Bay—a 2017 pre-Halloween gig in Clearwater—he ripped into tunes that even The Who never played live (“How Many Friends,” “It’s Not Enough”) and even live debuted a solo tune still being worked out for an album that released a year later. He’s been back to Tampa Bay twice since then—both times with Pete Townshend and a symphony orchestra—and sure enough, there are new songs, mainly off of The Who’s eponymous 2019 album, for Roger to test the live waters on for the first time. We just had Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band live debut new music in Tampa last week, and we’re more than willing to have a member of the British Invasion do the same thing. (Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater)

Sunshine City Smokeout: Bobby Friss w/ Logan Grant/The Dirty Janes/more Friss, a classic-rock favorite at motorcycle festivals across Tampa Bay, headlines the music lineup for the St. Pete Pier’s inaugural BBQ competition, alongside Logan Grant (whose band the Show Ponies is secretly one of the best bar bands in town), plus unabashed big hair, rock and roll impresarios The Dirty Janes. (Spa Beach Park, St. Petersburg)

Take Lead w/Glass House Point/Wild Love Fans of Foster the People will dig Orlando indie band Take Lead (and maybe hear some deep similarities in a year-old single, “Hunny”). The quartet wraps a weeklong tour of the south this weekend alongside Tampa band Glass House Point (whose latest LP, Verglas , was produced by Copeland’s Aaron Marsh). Emo-ish Georgia outfit Well Kept and Virginia-originating pop trio Wild Love are the visitors, so buy their merch to put gas in the tank. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa)

Tiger 54 w/John Nowicki/Shae

Kirspinsky/SydLive/Kevin Siebel and the Deluxe 12/more Pepin Academies has served students with learning disabilities for 24 years now, and to help the kids on the Tampa campus go to Kennedy Space Center, the school gets a boost from eight homegrown artists playing a fundraiser concert, silent auction and raffle in the backyard of this Tampa Heights sports emporium. (Shuffle, Tampa)

The Urbane Cowboys w/Rebekah Pulley & the Reluctant Prophets/Rachel Lynn Kids have a chance to get acquainted with one of Tampa’s longest running Americana bands next month at downtown’s familyfriendly Rock the Park, but an adults-only, no-cover gig goes down this weekend at the neighborhood’s sacred dive bar where Urbane Cowboys is supported by a timetested local folk favorite (Rebekah Pulley), plus songwriter Rachel Lynn. (The Hub, Tampa)

.Wav Beat Battle Series Local beat battles are great for watching rappers network with producers, and even prove fruitful for simple supporters of the scene who end up with a handful of new beat makers to follow on Soundcloud and Bandcamp. This one features a $1,000 prize to be doled out by three judges all while DJ Qeys spins and the evening’s host, Beyo, celebrates his birthday, too. (Crowbar, Ybor City)

MON 13

John Mellencamp February is proving to be a month where a good chunk of worldrenowned singer-songwriters are heading to Tampa Bay. Bruce Springsteen and Judy Collins both rolled in last Wednesday, and adopted Tampa son Paul Thorn plays his seemingly annual gig at the Bilheimer Capitol Theatre on Feb. 18. Mr. “Jack and Diane plays three nights in a row in Clearwater his first full tour post-COVID, and he’s got his new album, Strictly a One-Eyed Jack to work off of, as well as his fabled career. Mellencamp is also being sponsored by Turner Classic Movies—on which he has been a guest programming host before—a first for him, as he has never openly been sponsored by anything while on the road. But ain’t that America? (Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater)

TUE 14

Jim Messina w/Henry Gross Messina truly is one of the last of his close peers that doesn’t appear to have any plans to stop touring. Stephen Stills and Neil Young’s future tour plans—together or apart—have been in question since before COVID-19 was a thing, Poco has been done since two band members died in 2021, and Kenny Loggins just announced that his next tour will be his last. As for the 75-year-old icon, he seldom heads for the studio

these days, and prefers to stick to the material that gave him his clout all those years ago. Woodstock-era Sha Na Na member, and parttime Naples resident Henry Gross opens his Valentine’s Day show in downtown Clearwater. (Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater)

THU 16

Andrea Bocelli In recent years, modern opera’s most iconic tenor has made a point to stop into Tampa Bay on or around Valentine’s Day. With a voice that Celine Dion wouldn’t roll up her car window to, Bocelli has been moving even the coldest of souls for almost 30 years now. The 64-year-old will be backed by a full symphony orchestra. To think he was going to be a lawyer, huh? (Amalie Arena, Tampa)

Bella’s Bartok w/Chaunces/Brianna

Tam Bella’s Bartok describes itself as “A passionate kaleidoscope of sound, born of Americana and Folk music.” That’s putting it lightly. Hailing from the tiny Massachusetts town of Great Barrington, the septet’s set is a veritable mindfuck and melting pot of genres that goes well beyond folk and into Americana, pop and even punk. The band has always been political, and it’ll be interesting how far it goes a week after the president’s State of the Union. Cellist Brianna Tam opens the show along with St.

Petersburg’s very own prince of quirky pop, Chaunces. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa)

Rod Stewart When Sir Rod wrapped his long-awaited tour with Cheap Trick at Tampa’s Amalie Arena last year, some fans were under the impression that it was the last time he’d put on an elaborate production linked to his rock material, having recently shown interest in taking his Great American Songbook side on the road. Photos of him with Faces—with whom he supposedly is working on new music—scrolled by during “Ooh La La,” and on “Do Ya Think I’m Sexy,” graphics of dildos and water droplet emojis flashed in front of cheetah print. Roddy must have had a change of heart, because he’s gonna do it all over again for a far smaller crowd. (Hard Rock Event Center at Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino, Tampa)

Stanley Jordan Plays Jimi Chicago blues guitarist Jordan has played with the likes of Dizzy Gillespie, but currently, his heart belongs to Jimi Hendrix. The 63-year-old describes his current run of shows as how he envisions what Hendrix would be doing onstage, had he lived much longer. Jordan does have the tapping ability down, so if he can play with his teeth, this gig is probably the closest we’re gonna get to vicariously living through one of Hendrix’s two performances at Curtis Hixon Hall in 1968. (The Attic at Rock Brothers Brewing, Ybor City)

Bella’s Bartok

COURTESY

FRI 2/10 - VENESSA COLLIER

TUE 2/14 - SHANNA IN A DRESS

FRI 3/02 - ALBERT CUMMINGS

FRI 3/10 & SAT 3/11 - WILL EVANS

FRI 3/17 - TALL TALL TREES

THU 3/23 - BLOOD BROTHERS

FRI 4/21 - BILL AND THE BELLES

SAT 4/29 - SHAWN MULLINS

Tampa, Beyoncé is ready to spouse us again. After getting the town into formation at Raymond James Stadium in 2016, Queen Bey announced plans to come back to the Bay this summer.

Details about tickets to see Beyoncé at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa on Wednesday, Aug. 16 were not yet available at press time. The only other Florida date on Beyoncé’s “Renaissance” tour is at Miami’s Hard Rock Stadium.

The 41-year-old superstar’s seventh album, Renaissance , was released last summer and immediately hit no. 1 on the Billboard 200. She said it was the first in a three-part series, so no one would be surprised if she gave fans new music before her upcoming world tour of stadiums kicks off in Sweden this summer.

The run is her first outing since co-headlining a 2018 tour with her husband, Jay-Z, and in support of an album that saw a few edits

Hank Williams Jr. w/Old Crow Medicine

Show Friday, May 19. 7 p.m. $29.50 & up. Midflorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa

Puscifer w/Night Club Friday, May 19. 8 p.m. $53 & up. Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg

Deeper w/Foyer Red/more Tuesday, May 30. 7 p.m. $13. Crowbar, Ybor City

Narrow Head w/Graham Hunt Thursday, June 1. 7 p.m. $18. Crowbar, Ybor City

Ugly Kid Joe w/Fozzy Sunday, June 4. 7 p.m. $29.50. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

Iamx Tuesday, June 6. 7 p.m. $30. Orpheum, Tampa

Ricardo Arjona Thursday, June 22. 8 p.m $79.74 & up. Yuengling Center, Tampa

Sad Summer Festival: Taking Back Sunday/The Maine/L.S. Dunes/PVRIS/

after its release (as P4K points out, ableist lyrics were replaced, along with edits to a song that featured Kelis).

Beyoncé—who already has 25 Grammys— could also arrive in Tampa this fall with even more accolades since she’s nominated for nine more golden gramophones at the 2023 awards.

See Josh Bradley’s latest new concert roundup below.—Ray Roa

LS Dunes/Hot Mulligan/Mom Jeans/ Stand Atlantic/Cliffdiver Friday, July 7. 2 p.m. $39.50 & up. Coachman Park, Clearwater

Young The Giant w/Milky Chance/Rosa

Linn Friday, July 21. 7 p.m. $36.75 & up. Yuengling Center, Tampa

Nickelback w/Brantley Gilbert/Josh Ross Saturday, July 29. 6:30 p.m. $36 & up. Midflorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa

Madonna Thursday, Sept. 7. 8:30 p.m. $40 & up. Amalie Arena, Tampa

Eric Church w/Whiskey Myers Saturday, Sept. 30. 7:30 p.m. Prices TBA. Midflorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa

Stephen Sanchez Wednesday, Dec. 13. 7 p.m. $25. Orpheum, Tampa

Kansas Saturday, Jan. 20. 8 p.m. $43.75 & up. Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater

At the crossroads

By Caroline DeBruhl

Dear Oracle, a few months ago, I went to another state to visit a friend, “M,” and met her friend, “R.” We really hit it off and started talking daily. I’ve gone back to visit R, and it was not exactly smooth. I didn’t know what to make of it when I left, but we still talk all the time, and he tells me he cares about me a lot. “M” has asked him flat out if he wants to date, and he says yes, but he doesn’t want to “fuck it up.” I don’t know what to do. Do we keep working at this, or is it doomed because it’s long distance?—Single and trying

Cards: Seven of Cups, Three of Swords, Ace of Cups, Two of Swords (reversed)

about balance, and for the Two of Swords, it’s about using a critical eye to see what’s needed for true balance. You’re at a crossroads right now, and this relationship—as you describe—does not seem balanced. You seem ready to commit, R does not. That has been the situation for the past few months and the situation today.

ORACLE OF YBOR

Dear Single, to get this out of the way: while long distance can be a bummer, plenty of relationships survive it. It’s not a death blow and, in some ways, can deepen a relationship because you spend so much time just talking. However, the issues you’re describing don’t actually have to do with the distance. I don’t know R, but I have a witchy feeling that he would still have a fear of “fucking it up” and keep this relationship in the “are we/aren’t we” limbo, even if he lived a mile away.

I want to start with the last card of the spread, the Two of Swords reversed. Twos are

The Seven of Cups is another type of crossroads. There are plenty of options presented but be wary: some of these are deceitful. It’s important to apply that critical eye to the situation in front of you. What does it actually look like to “keep working at it”? What is R prepared to give you at this moment—not in six months, not in two years, but right now? What can you expect if you visit again? What would it look like if you don’t “work on it”? Most importantly: do you think R is your only option? Do you feel like it’s work on things with R or stay single? If so, why do you think that? And is that thought deceitful?

With the heartsick Three of Swords and the Ace of Cups, I think you very much want to be in love. Yu want to have a healthy, loving relationship—we all do—but this thing with R is not making you happy. He’s not giving you any relationship right now, let alone a healthy one.

Will cutting it off hurt? Probably. Will it hurt more than staying? I don’t know. I think you have to turn that critical eye to your own heart. Is this current pain worth the potential future with R? Will it hurt more to stop speaking with R and try with someone else? Is the pain of being single greater or less than what R can give you now? Be honest with yourself about how you’re feeling and what you want. And be frank with R. Tell him what you’d like, and he can tell you if he wants the same thing. Maybe he will. Maybe he won’t. But use that critical eye to protect your heart. I’m sorry for this difficult situation. Whatever you decide, I hope you find peace.

Dear Oracle, I’m about to move in with my girlfriend. It’s the first time either of us has lived with a romantic partner. Any advice?—Next

Step Newbie

Cards: Six of Wands, Six of Cups, Justice

First, have a space in your new apartment that’s just yours. Maybe it’s a desk or a bookshelf but a place where you can put your things and arrange them as you like. It creates a little anchor of “you" in the home.

Then agree on household labor. Does one person cook and the other do dishes? Who washes the towels? Cleans the bathroom? Ground rules like help. With the Justice card, having those boundaries and balance in place will help things go smoothly.

Justice also can be about financial balance. Are you both going to split the bills 50/50? In proportion to your salaries? By expense? (Someone covers rent while someone else covers the food and light bill.) Again, it’s great if all expectations are laid out in full.

Other conversations should include guest policy (regular, overnight, and multi-day), cleanliness expectations, closet division, décor choices, air conditioning temperatures (day and night), and whether you think it’s appropriate to use the overhead light at all times or if lamps should be relied upon. (I, myself, am staunchly pro-lamp.)

But for the most part, you should enjoy this new step! The Six of Wands is a celebratory card that pops up when there’s joy and excitement in the air. It’s a public display and the public is happy for you. It’s a big deal to move in with your partner! It announces a level of seriousness and I have a feeling people are happy that you two are taking this step. The child-like love of the Six of Cups suggests that you two are going to grow up together (or grow old together, depending on how old you are now) while also creating a home that feels safe and comfortable. It can be incredibly fun and fulfilling to make a home with a person, and I hope as you two feel that joy and comfort. There’ll probably be some bumps along the way but I hope they’re small and manageable.

Send your questions to oracle@cltampa.com or DM @theyboracle on Instagram.

Quickies

By Dan Savage

My fiancé has a foot fetish, and he hates it. Can you tell him it’s harmless and immutable? Harmless! Immutable! Also, we’re living in the golden age of foot-fetishist representation—from the conniving, murderous, unctuous Ser Larys Strong on HBO’s “House of the Dragon” (prestige television!) to the sweet, goofy, traumatized Jimmy on TLC’s “MILF Manor” (trash television!), guys with a thing for feet are suddenly all over our screens. And as kinks go, there are far… well, I don’t want to say worse fetishes. Let’s just say there are fetishes that are far harder to explain, far riskier to attempt, and that a vanilla partner is far less likely to happily indulge you in.

allowed to have sex with (or want to have sex with) isn’t willing to give other places, times, and ways a try, well, breakups are never boring.

How does one find space for masturbation when living together with very little alone time? One takes long showers, one gets up early or goes to bed late, one seizes opportunities as they present themselves, e.g., partner has a doctor’s appointment, partner is out with friends, partner is locked in the storage unit in the basement.

SAVAGE LOVE

Speaking of Muppet faces… who is your favorite actual Muppet? My ideal man has always been Janice from the Muppets, no lipstick, less mascara, and a very big dick.

then-mistress’s tampon. How did we all manage to do that? Well, we tried not to think about it; and when that failed (when certain prestige dramas reminded us), we tried to remember that it’s none of our business. You can get used to trans women exploring tampons the same way: try not to think about it and if you find yourself thinking about it despite your best efforts… remind yourself that it’s none of your business.

Can someone be bad at cuddling? Yes.

Is it possible to “turn” someone gay? No.

Is marriage worth it? Yes and no.

and he gets to make his own choices. But your body is your body. You can do what you like with your body, and you get to make your own choices. And if you and your body don’t wanna be with someone who drinks as much as your boyfriend does, you can choose to take your body and go. If your boyfriend and his body would like you and your body to stay, he can choose to drink less.

Would you contact an ex after a year to ask how they are? Depends on the ex, depends on the breakup, and depends on where we left things. If the ex was a genuinely nice person that I liked, I might be inclined to reach out. If I experienced the breakup as amicable and I have every reason to believe my ex did too, I might be inclined to reach out. And if the last time we talked we both said we would be open to being friends in the future, I might be inclined to reach out.

Are you experienced with chastity? I have tried on a cock cage—once a philosopher— but the idea of having my cock locked up for an extended period of time doesn’t appeal to me.

Is sexting real sex or mutual masturbation? Is sex with an AI chatbot real sex or masturbation? The American Psychological Association defines “mutual masturbation” as a “sexual activity in which two individuals stimulate each other’s genitals at the same time for the purpose of sexual gratification.” (Emphasis added for, well, emphasis.) Since you can’t touch someone else’s junk via sext message, sexting wouldn’t count as mutual masturbation. It’s a shared erotic experience, and one many people in monogamous relationships would consider cheating, but it’s not a sex act. And while you can certainly stimulate your own genitals as you swap messages with an AI chatbot, that’s not fucking. That’s typing.

How do I get my libido back? I’ve lost it to SSRIs and boredom. Talk to your doctor about adjusting your meds—advocate for your own libido—and then talk to your partner about breaking out of your sexual rut(s).

If you’re always having sex with the same person, in the same place, at the same time, and in the same way, try having sex with someone else, someplace else, at some other time, and in some other way. If you aren’t allowed to have sex with anyone else, then have sex someplace else, at some other time, and in some other way with your partner. And if the only person you’re

What can/should I wear to a fetish party if leather/latex aren’t my thing(s)? Check if the fetish party you’re planning to attend has a dress code. Some require a certain kind of fetish attire (usually leather and/or latex), but these days most fetish parties are open to any kind of fetish attire. You’ll see people at fetish parties in leather and latex, of course, but you’ll also see people in zentai suits, wrestling singlets, jockstraps, canvas straightjackets, fursuits or nothing at all.

What is the best way to meet bi cis women in LTRs with men who want to hookup? There are apps for that.

Shoes or boots? Wearing? Shoes. Licking? Boots.

I have two friends who hate each other. Neither knows I’m friends with the other. What do I do? Whatever you’ve been doing, I guess, seeing as you’ve managed to be friends with both without either finding out. Alternatively, you could tell them both and watch what happens. If one issues an ultimatum (you can’t be friends with both of us, you have to pick, etc.), you should definitely end your friendship—with the person who issued the ultimatum. If they both issue ultimatums, go make new and better friends.

How do I cope with feeling ostracized from my local kink community due to some unfair accusations? Get input from people who know you and may have observed your interactions at kink events and/or with your past partner(s), learn from your mistakes (if any), make amends (if possible), and get help (if necessary). And if you’re still not welcome in your local kink community… you’ll have to find or create a new one.

I’m feeling very weird about trans women exploring tampons with such wonder, a feeling that has taken me off guard. We got used to having a King of England who once explored—through fantasy and, for all we know, through roleplay—being his

Gay tops and bottoms—nature or nurture? Some gay men really, really wanna bottom but can’t because bottoming—being the one getting fucked during anal intercourse—just doesn’t work for them; there’s just some physiological thing that prevents them from getting fucked. That’s nature. Some gay men don’t wanna bottom because it conflicts with their self-conception—the person they see themselves as—and some gay men don’t want to top for the same reason. That’s nurture. And some people are versatile, of course, and some—sides—aren’t interested in topping or bottoming, at least when it comes to anal sex.

Dealing with ED—erectile dysfunction—and really don’t like taking Viagra. Any suggestions? If it’s the side effects that bother you… try another ED med, such as Cialis, or a lower dose of Viagra. If it’s the symbolism that bothers you… get over it. Also, try cockrings maybe.

Why would my boyfriend spend an amazing weekend filled with sex and affection with me, then make future plans, only to dump me over the phone a few days later without any real explanation, empathy, or care? I feel confused and abandoned. Your exboyfriend’s behavior wasn’t confusing. It was clarifying. Now you can clearly see what you missed before: your ex-boyfriend is an asshole. You don’t (or shouldn’t) want to be with an asshole, so he did you a favor—a painful favor, but still—by revealing himself to be an asshole and promptly exiting your life, which is the nicest thing an asshole can possibly do for you.

My boyfriend drinks three to four drinks per day. Is it my place to ask him to reduce consumption? It’s his body, after all. It’s his body, he can do what he likes with it,

I’m a 40-year-old man and I’m about to be single again. How do I approach dating? With a sense of wonder and anticipation—also, a real appreciation for your luck, as your timing could not be better. You don’t mention your sexual orientation, but the world is suddenly full of men and women—some your own age, some significantly younger—who are all about dating, fucking, and possibly marrying daddies, e.g., hot men in their 40s and 50s. Make sure you’re in good working order, be respectful, and brush up on the campsite rule (always leave ‘em in better shape then you found ‘em), and have fun out there.

Is it wrong to watch incest scenarios in porn? I fear this is a trick question designed to make me say something that could be construed as positive about incest. So, for the record: as a person with siblings, parents, stepparents, aunts, uncles, etc., and a vivid and very visual imagination, blech blech blech. With that out of the way…

If watching incest porn troubles you, ask yourself why you’re watching it. If incest scenarios are your kink, well, then you’re going to keep watching incest porn. But if you’re watching incest porn because it’s transgressive and taboo and it feels wrong, well, there’s lots of other transgressive, taboo, and wrong sexual scenarios portrayed in porn and erotica that you might enjoy just as much and feel a little less shitty about “consuming.”

Why do I have to feel ashamed in order to come? Because that’s what turns you on. But just like women who need vibrators in order to come shouldn’t feel ashamed, and men who need tit play in order to come shouldn’t feel ashamed, dirty little sex perverts like you who need to feel ashamed in order to come shouldn’t feel ashamed either… despite being the kind of dirty little sex pervert who gets off on feeling ashamed, you dirty little sex pervert.

Send your burning questions to mailbox@ savage.love. Podcasts, columns and more at savage.love!

NOTE: Ever since automakers started adding the two-letter slug to their car names (like the Camry “LE”), drugmakers, inexplicably, have followed suit.

(It’s not just Ambien, it’s Ambien “CR”). So here’s a test of your knowledge of models vs. meds, past and present. (By the way, every letter of the alphabet will appear at least once in the solution.)

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