El Ojo del Mar - August 2011

Saw you in the Ojo

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Saw you in the Ojo

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FEATURE ARTICLES

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COVER STORY

Beth Berube recounts the odyssey she and her husband, Larry, made in their Jeep all the way from Seattle to Barra de Navidad. The sights, sounds and people awaiting her in newly-adopted country were unlike any she had ever seen or heard.

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SPORTS

COVER STORY

Index...

VOLUME 3 NUMBER 1  D IR EC T OR Y  PUBLISHER Richard Tingen

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Alejandro Grattan-Domínguez Tel: 01-800-765-3788

6 Cover by Dani Newcomb

Kim Anders, a golf pro in Mazatlan, offers tips on the game that approach the teaching of a Zen Master. Some of them are also rather comically couched.

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HUMOR

Gail Nott, who’s always good for a laugh, gives us several chuckles as she remembers her initial and bewildering poker game with several ex-pat ladies in Puerto Vallarta. Her first mistake was, after being falsely fortified by a couple of Margaritas, she naively began to think she understood the game.

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MEXICAN HISTORY

Shep Lenchek writes about one of the most fascinating men ever to hold the presidency in Mexico, a job he won and lost more than a half-dozen times!

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LOCAL CUSTOMS

Victoria Schmidt has noticed that much of the manual labor that is done in Mexico is done with tools and farming implements that seem like from of another century.

Associate Publisher David Tingen Director of Marketing Bruce Fraser Graphic Design Roberto C. Rojas Jazmin Eliosa Associate Editor Jim Tipton Contributing Editor Paul Jackson Contributing Editor Mark Sconce Staff Photographer Xill Fessenden Staff Writers Ilse Hoffmann Floyd Dalton Sales Manager Bruce Fraser 333 559 2046 info@elojodelmar.com Office Secretary Iliana Oregel

ADVERTISING OFFICE

“This month we introduce a new feature which will assist readers to identify advertisers in their local area. At the top of each page we have printed the name of the town or city in which the advertisers on that page are located.

As a regional publication we recognize that it is sometimes frustrating to readers to figure out where a specific advertiser does business. And, we want to make it as easy as possible for you to support those advertisers who are in your neighborhood. One exception is page 3, where the advertisers hail from a variety of towns across the region. We will also not put locations on the full page ads on the glossy pages.”

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El Ojo del Mar / August 2011

Send all correspondence, or advertising to: El Ojo del Mar www.elojodelmar.com info@elojodelmar.com Ave. Hidalgo 223 (or Apartado 279), 45900 Chapala, Jalisco Tels.: (376) 765 3676, Fax 765 3528 PRINTING: El Debate Circunvalacion No. 1, Fracc. Costa Brava, Mazatlan, Sinaloa.

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PUERTO VALLARTA ADS

By Alejandro Grattan HEMINGWAY—Half a Century Later

screenplay itself all the scenes in the novel. Later, the producer was furious, claiming the writer had left out several of the book’s best scenes.

In reality, those scenes were never written, but simply inferred—and if that’s not great writing, they should come up with another definition of “great.” Call it subliminal story-telling—and yet another reason why Ernest Hemingway’s work continues to enthrall readers all over the world.

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lmost fifty years have passed since Ernest Hemingway died of a self-inflicted shotgun wound. Yet both the man and his work continue to loom large over the literary landscape, much as did Kenya’s Mount Kilimanjaro atop the setting of one of his most famous short stories.

Given that the author has been repeatedly savaged by modern-day literary critics, his style lampooned ill-suited to their fame, Hemingway and caricatured, and even his sexual was...well, unabashedly Hemingway! preferences brought into question, When he died in 1961, the world the mystery deepens: why can’t the mourned the loss of one of the 20th world finally get the man out of its century’s most charismatic personalsystem? ities. Quickly forgotten was how hard Best-selling novelists come and the man had worked to perfect both go (some often, to the bank, like bilhis style, as well as his stories. The lionaire Dan Brown of The Di Vinci literary gadfly George Plimpton was Code fame), but few had the paastounded to learn that Hemingnache, film-star looks, courage and way had rewritten the last scene of good luck that Hemingway did. He A Farewell to Arms 39 times. “I was was in Italy during the First World trying to get the War, Paris in the early 20s, Spain during By the late 50s, how- words right,” was the its Civil War, Europe ever, it didn’t matter author’s simple explanation. Also lost during WWII, Kenya in the early 50s and what he wrote any- in the hoopla was Cuba in the mid-50s. more: he had become the sensitivity that From these ex- his own best creation. he had partially hidden over the years periences came the but revealed in his deeply touching novels that made him world-famous: memoir, A Moveable Feast.

A Farewell to Arms, The Sun Also Rises, As for his unique style of writing, For Whom the Bell Tolls, Across the the citation for his Nobel Prize for River and Into the Trees (his only critiLiterature reads, “For his forceful and cal failure), and The Old Man and the style-making mastery of modern Sea. By the late 50s, however, it didn’t narration.” Not bad—but not quite matter what he wrote anymore: he enough. Hemingway had little rehad become his own best creation— gard for “the literary boys” who cona handsome, macho, best-selling ausidered poetic prose more important thor and an expert on fishing, shootthan compelling stories and memoing, boxing and bull-fighting, stomprable characters. Rather than “pretty ing around the world as if demandup” his work with decorative ading to see the manager. verbs, adjectives and phrases, he put In the Fifties, the writer A.E. Hotchhis stock in unique nouns, muscular ner journeyed to Cuba to interview verbs, and some of the best dialogue Hemingway—and always rememever written. bered his first impression of him. “I His style is suggestive rather never met a man so happy to be who than direct. When Hollywood was he was. His love of his life filled the about to remake A Farewell to Arms in room.” At a time when many other fa1957, the producer asked a famous mous novelists like J.D. Salinger and screenwriter to list as a lead-in to the Philip Roth seemed miserable and

ALEJANDRO GRATTAN is a former screenwriter/ film director who has published seven novels. Two of his novels are in over 1000 libraries in the US and Canada.

He co-founded the Ajijic Writers’ Group 23 years ago and has been the Editor of El Ojo del Lago for the past 16 years. grattan@prodigy.net.mx

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MANZANILLO ADS

AS A ST THE HE T TACO ACO T TURNS URNS

By Beth Berube berubebeth@yahoo.com Road Trippin’ Like a Belle Wheels

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ed up with taking taxis, hopping buses, renting cars and hitching rides with friends, Larry and I decided to drive our Jeep from Seattle to Mexico with the intention of leaving our wheels in Barra de Navidad.

With the help of AAA, we planned our adventure. We would load up our stuff and head south on Christmas Day. The first part of our itinerary included a stop at Larry’s daughter’s house in Southern California. Driving more than eight hours a day is pure torture unless I am sprawled out on an overstuffed divan in the back of a super-sized Winnebago. I prefer a lollygagging journey where I set a leisurely pace and visit riveting attractions such as cheese factories (I love the free samples) and shell emporiums.

Larry was more, as he liked to describe himself, a Point A to Point B traveler. He used to high top the freeway at breakneck speed, making as few pit stops as possible ---- even when I was pleading for one. I use the imperfect tense used to like because not so long ago he began to have prostate issues. Being of the female persuasion, this was something about which I knew little. After researching this puny gland on the internet, I would describe it as the car radiator of a man’s body. The older it gets, the

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of my mouth. Say, if Larry and Kyi, our dog, left as planned on Christmas Day, I could meet them in Southern California.

By my calculations, it would knock off twenty plus muscle cramping, bone bending hours. The Jeep pulled out of the driveway with Kyi riding on shotgun and three days later my man and his terrier picked me up at the Santa Barbara airport.

I was smiling ear to ear, completely rested and complaint free. more frequently We crossed the border at Nogales, its lines need to Arizona. The custom officials must be flushed and have thought we looked more like drained. the Clampetts than Michoacan drug In Larry’s case, there was nothing warlords because we scooted along diminutive about his prostate. It was as quickly as a Starbucks barista line. as big as a Tyson chicken injected We didn’t even have to pay duty on with steroids, which meant that evthe three ceiling fans stuffed under ery fifteen minutes or so he needed the dog. We decided to spend the to look for a relief station. If it was night in a town called San Carlos. It me with the mutant prostate, I would had been a long road warrior day. I take in liquids like a camel, drinking was disheveled and my disposition only every two days or so. I might sagged. I needed some pampering. look like a desiccated old prune, but Stat. at least I could make Her ample bosoms After settling into it to Costco and back our hotel, I ambled without having to strained the seams and down the street in map quest every from the waist up she search of a beauty gas station along parlor. I found one the route. I tried my looked like whole wheat on the corner. Its best to muster wife- bread dough rising on sun faded awning ly sympathy, but re- top of a warm oven. was green, red and venge is sweet and white; the colors of I admit to once purposefully flitting the Mexican flag. A poster of a hand past an exit sign that read “Next Rest with fire engine red nails was taped Stop 137 Miles”. Oops! to the window. This would be a stelI received my December work lar opportunity to not only indulge schedule and realized that not only my senses, but also to put my Rosetta was I working on Christmas Day, but Stone Spanish exercises to good use. two days after as well. I tried to find A butterball Latina greeted me someone to trade trips with me, but with a toothy smile and introduced alas, no other flight attendant wanted herself as Celia. She sported pedal to work on the holiday either. Then pusher pants and a spandex blouse I had an epiphany. It was a stroke of that was about two sizes too small. genius really. I wrung my hands and a Her ample bosoms strained the seams Grinch like grin formed at the corners and from the waist up she looked like whole wheat bread dough rising on top of a warm oven. She escorted me to her station where Jelly Belly colored polishes were arranged in neat rows inside of a cigar box. I pointed to a bottle of enamel in a tangerine hue called Papaya and sat down.

Tucked into the frame of the mirror that hung on the wall in front of me was a photo. A young girl sat on the lap of a kind faced elderly woman. Two other ninos stood next to them. None of the children appeared to be over six years of age. I asked Celia if they were hers. She answered proudly that they were, and the older woman was her mother. She also had several sisters, brothers, nieces and

El Ojo del Mar / August 2011

nephews. Her parents lived with her and her husband.

Then she placed her hand gently on her stomach and told me she was embarazada. I asked her when the baby was due and she responded, “In four months.” She asked me “How many children do you have?” I answered “I don’t have children. But I am blessed with a husband and a dog.” Celia’s hand faltered and a globule of papaya polish formed a pearl at the tip of the brush, lingering a moment before surrendering its hold and falling to the floor. I imagined a mental movie, deep in her mind, playing a scratchy black- and- white newsreel of my womb; a barren wasteland scattered with tumbleweeds whispering sad songs to a lifeless sky. She dipped the brush back into the bottle.

“Well,” she said and offered me a dollop of condolence. “Children are wonderful, but they make their mothers sick with worry.” I nodded and shrugged my shoulders. My Spanish is not very good and I have difficulty grasping its subtle nuances.

Maybe what she really said was “Your life is a sham and you will die a pitiful death, alone and heavy hearted.”

In this country a woman is seldom childless by choice. Children are their lifelines, their get-out-of-jail-free cards and their extended warranty protection coverage. The fact that I made a conscious decision to forgo motherhood was a concept that could not be translated, even if I explained it to Celia in perfect Spanish.

Taking care not to gouge my prettified nails, I made a snappy exodus from the salon. Celia seemed so concerned about my lack of offspring, I was afraid she might insist that I take one of hers.

I arrived back at the hotel and found Larry and Kyi waiting for me.

Larry was finishing his ice cream. Kyi was oblivious to my presence. His primordial gaze was fixed on the cone.

In a few hours we would be continuing our road trip and surprisingly, I looked forward to the drive.

(To be Continued) BETH BERUBE at the tender age of 20 joined United Airlines as a Flight Attendant. After 30 years of world travel, she and her husband Larry found their place in the sun in Barra de Navidad. She not only wants to tell people about it she wants to invite people to share it with her.

GUADALAJARA ADS

The Poets’ Niche

By Mark Sconce msconce@gmail.com

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832)

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he Guadalajara Reporter headline stared back at me: City’s Goethe* Institute Closes Its Doors.

My eyes locked, a memory-dream claimed me: On the train to Frankfurt that night, my sole traveling companion turned out to be a student in his twenties, five years my elder. Our small talk turned to poetry for some reason, and I remember asking him if maybe the German language wasn’t particularly well-suited for recitation. Kurt took no offense whatever, seeing instead a teachable moment, a time to dispel my notion. He began to recite Germany’s greatest poet, Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, and proved within a few stanzas that German poetry was beautiful to hear. I also learned what it means to be a callow youth.

Who wants to understand the poem Must go to the land of poetry; Who wishes to understand the poet Must go to the poet’s land. Goethe Next station stop, Frankfurt, where Goethe was born into Lutheran circumstances in 1749 and where his house is now a national museum/shrine. I would eventually enroll in Berlin’s Das Goethe Institut , home to German language studies, history, politics, literature, culture and a fitting memorial to the last great Renaissance man—poet/philosopher, playwright, novelist, diplomat, civil servant, amateur scientist (discovered the human intermaxillary bone), botanist (The Metamorphosis of Plants, 1790), scientific theorist (The Theory of Colors, 1810), meteorologist (The Goethe Barometer), mineralogist (rock hound). “The greatest happiness for the thinking man is to have fathomed the fathomable, and to quietly revere the unfathomable.” Goethe All of you know The Sorcerer’s Apprentice, some of you know The Sorrows of Werther, and many of you know his most famous play, Faust, the ambitious scholar who makes that notorious and odious deal with the Devil--his soul for unlimited power and knowledge. “Am I a god? I see so clearly!” But this column’s space allows for only a few of Goethe’s

quotations and enchanting lyric poems.

Knowest thou the land where the lemon trees bloom, Where the gold orange glows in the deep thicket’s gloom, Where a wind ever soft from the blue heaven blows, And the groves are of laurel and myrtle and rose?

--Tr. By Longfellow

Given to the sentimental, Goethe was the idol of Romantics.

I think of you, whenever sunlight’s glimmer On ocean breaks.

I think of you, whenever moonlight’s shimmer Reflects in lakes.

I see your face, when over distant ridges The mist appears; In the deepest night, when crossing narrow bridges, The wand’rer fears.

I hear your voice, within the muffled surging Of sea’s refrains; In peaceful groves, I hear your voice emerging, When silence reigns.

You may be far, but I am still attendant, I hold you near!

The sun has set, the stars are now ascendant.

Were you but here!

--Tr. By James Falen for this column Finally, Germany’s most exalted cultural figure lay dying, age 83, “More light,” his final words.

Close friend, Johann Eckermann, reported: “The morning after Goethe’s death, a deep desire seized me to look once again upon his earthly garment. A perfect man lay in great beauty before me; and the rapture the sight caused me made me forget for a moment that the immortal spirit had left such an abode. I laid my hand on his heart – there was a deep silence – and I turned away to give free vent to my suppressed tears.” *For the diphthong challenged, it’s GrrrrrTuh. **I am indebted to Professor Emeritus James E. Falen for his translations herein.

Deep gratitude to Fred Mittag for helping me understand Goethe’s Weltanshauung.

MARK SCONCE--Antiochian, Nepal Peace Corps Volunteer, Berkeley Journalism Student, International Model Agent, Pushkin Aficionado, Poet, Writer.

Had Goethe visited Ajijic?

Mountain peaks are dreaming Mid the silent night; Quiet vales are gleaming In the dewy light.

Underneath the moon Birds are in their nest; Wait a while and soon You as well shall rest.

--Tr. By Jim Falen for this column** Politically conservative but hardly dour, Goethe penned the following: In the wilderness a holy man To his surprise met a servant of Pan, A goat-footed faun, who spoke with grace: ‘Lord, pray for me and for my race, That we in heaven find a place: We thirst for God’s eternal bliss. The holy man made answer to this: ‘How can I grant thy bold petition, For thou canst hardly gain admission In heaven yonder where angels salute: For lo! thou has a cloven foot.’

Undaunted the wild man made the plea: ‘Why should my foot offensive be?

I’ve seen great numbers that went straight With asses’ heads through heaven’s gate.’

—Tr. by Paul Carus

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GUADALAJARA / MANZANILLO / PUERTO VALLARTA ADS

Anyone An nyone eC Can an Train Their Dog

By Art Hess arthedogguy@yahoo.com

Daily Walks And The Excited Dog

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outside. If you make a concentrated efhe daily dog walk is not fort you can teach this procedure in one only your best training and or two training sessions. exercise opportunity, it is Now we’re ready for the real walk. also the highlight of your dog’s day.

Equip yourself with a pocket of treats The problem is many dogs get so overly (pieces of kibble will do the job) and excited with the prospect of going for with the dog on your left side on a the walk that they become impossible loose leash with at least six inches of monsters. With the jumping and crazy slack you take a couple of steps and activity plus the fight just to get the say “let’s go.” As long as the dog walks leash on, they continue this foolishness along at a normal pace with his head by pulling the owner down the street and shoulders beside your left knee and ducking into and behind every tree, you praise him and keep walking. gate, or whatever they encounter until Just in case he’s one of those that the owner says “to heck with this stuff ” charges off and decides he’s leading and the dog walks become history. the parade on a tight Luckily it doesn’t have to be that way, As long as the dog leash here’s all you do. so let’s change things. walks along at a normal STOP, STAND STILL. When he figures out Before we start the process just pick up pace with his head and you’re not going anythe leash, walk to the shoulders beside your where he’ll eventually whereupon you’ll door and if the dog left knee you praise sit give him one of those starts to act up in any way you walk back to him and keep walking. treats you’ve got stashed in your pockthe kitchen counter et.

Now start again and try for three or and leave the leash. In a few minutes four steps before he gets out of posiyou start again and until he sits at the tion. But persist. As soon as he leaves door and accepts having the leash put the magic zone you STOP. This time he on while he remains quiet you simwill sit sooner. As you proceed with ply quit and let him settle. No talk, no the stop, sit, treat process, you’ll find hands, no direction. JUST STAND THERE. that his walking in the correct position Trust me he will eventually figure things becomes longer and when he gets out out and when he does sit quietly you of shape and you stop he will be sitting say good dog, put on the leash and much quicker. proceed to the door. When you get to It’s not uncommon to have a dog the door he is directed to SIT and WAIT figure this out in a single lesson to while you open the door. If he moves, where he’ll walk beside and sit autoyou repeat the sit and wait process. matically when you stop. Good Luck When he finally waits until he’s asked LOOSE LEASHES, HAPPY TAILS. to proceed you go through the door and take a few steps and ask him, no direct him (in a calm but assertive voice) to sit. No matter if he jumps, charges, barks, yelps, or whatever, he is expected to sit. When he cools down and “lets the ART HESS has lived air out of his tires” you reward him with a in Mexico for several small treat and calmly turn around and years and says, “By go back into the house, walk to his bed, last count I’ve worked ask him to sit and remove the leash. with over four hundred dogs Repeat this exercise every half hour which must make me the luckiuntil he will accept the leash, quietly est guy in Mexico. ” walk to door and sit and wait until he’s invited to proceed out the door and will sit readily on command as soon as he’s

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MAZATLAN ADS

LIMITATIONS ON FREEDOM OF SPEECH: A Canadian Perspective

By Roderick MacDonald

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here is one story that far outweighs all others in terms of its gravity and potential implications for American society. I refer to the US Supreme Court case of Snyder versus Phelps.

This controversial First Amendment case involves members from a fundamentalist church in Kansas who say they want to draw attention to U.S. government policies that tolerate gays in the military and elsewhere. They typically carry signs at funerals that say, “Thank God for Dead Soldiers,” “God Hates Fags” and a variety of other anti-gay insults.

The lawsuit against them was filed by Albert Snyder, a Maryland man whose son, Marine Lance Cpl. Matthew Snyder, was killed in 2006 in Iraq. Snyder sued the Rev. Fred W. Phelps and his followers for intentional infliction of emotional distress after they protested at his son’s funeral.

A jury awarded Snyder $5 million but an appeals court later overturned the judgment, saying the church members’ actions were privileged as free speech under the First Amendment. Now the case is being heard by the US Supreme Court.

Now I would consider myself to be pretty much mainstream and like many of us has had to confront my own prejudices about same sex marriages and gay rights. Nevertheless, I am of the opinion that this case could represent a turning point in American social culture, if Snyder were to win.

And that is a very big “if.”

However, if that were to happen, and it appears doubtful, the US Court may move a little closer to the views held by Canada’s Supreme Court, which places reasonable limitations on free speech.

Whatever the US Supreme Court decision, it will come at a time when Americans are facing a flurry of challenges concerning the value of respect for simple human dignity. We witness the unforgiveable consequences of bullying in school as articulated in past weeks by CNN reports of the recent suicides of no fewer than five American teenagers, all of whom allegedly faced daily torment over real or perceived notions of sexual identity.

Further underscoring this lamentable situation, CNN aired several reports recently about an assistant attorney gen-

eral (if you can believe it) in Michigan who elevated harassment to an entire new level by his personal attacks on a college student president who happens to be gay.

These are the real victims of a growing wave of intolerance in America. While I realize First Amendment protections are not limited to gay-bashing, this is the very real human context in which the US Supreme Court must decide whether to place “reasonable” restrictions on freedom of speech abuses by a handful of cranks and wing-nuts who labor under the illusion that they are marching under personal instructions from the Almighty.

Give me a break.

Canada, like the United States, has a constitutional guarantee of free speech.

Our Charter of Rights and Freedoms guarantees freedom of expression, subject

The Canadian Supreme court has already wrestled with the implications of giving free rein to “fruitcakes,” and found in several cases that freedom of speech comes with some responsibilities. to such reasonable limits as are “demonstrably justifiable in a free and democratic society.” In other words, we have free speech, but the state can limit it in reasonable ways. This may be contrasted with the absolute language of the First Amendment of the United States Bill of Rights, which states: “Congress shall make no law ... abridging the freedom of speech or of the press.” The words of the Canadian guarantee acknowledge the state’s right to limit free speech; the words of the American guarantee forbid the state from doing so.

The Canadian Supreme court has already wrestled with the implications of giving free rein to fruitcakes, and found in several cases that freedom of speech comes with some responsibilities toward our fellow man and places certain restrictions on an open assault on public sensitivities. In one highly publicized case in 1990, the majority of Supreme Court

Justices looked at hate speech as not being a victimless crime, but instead having the potential for psychological harm, degradation, humiliation, and a risk of violence.

And that’s really the nut of it. In my opinion, this court also has the responsibility to protect the rights of its more vulnerable citizens from such onslaughts of hatred and bigotry. In other words, a dual responsibility to take the leadership required to move its constituency further along the road to an enlightened society.

While the issue of gay rights has supplanted abortion as one of the most contentious social issues today, it clearly has the ability to inflame passions on both sides. But like the protection afforded a woman’s right to choose, there will be no going back on an individual’s right to choose who they may love or marry.

In the case of Snyder versus Phelps, the issue at stake seems more than whether to censure the unforgiveable insensitivity of the invasion of privacy at a young soldier’s funeral, but also speaks to the need for a strongly worded declaration that this egregious affront to civilized behavior will not be tolerated. It is, at least for some, a matter of life and death.

(Ed. Note: Roderick MacDonald is a former Canadian journalist and writer now living in Mexico.)

RODERICK MACDONALD worked for over 20 years in radio, television, print media and corporate communications. A former native of Montreal, he has also been active as a business entrepreneur in Canada. Mr. MacDonald now makes his home in Mexico where he is working on his first historical novel

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MELAQUE / SAN PANCHO / BUCERIAS ADS

BRIDGE B RIDGE B BY Y THE THE SEA S EA

By Ken Masson masson.ken@gmail.com

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great way for advancing bridge players to further their skills is by watching top players in the heat of battle. Since the advent of the Internet this has become easier than ever with websites such as Bridge Base Online regularly covering high-level matches showing the play as it happens and with expert commentary for the benefit of viewers.

Three times each year the American Contract Bridge League organizes North American Bridge Championships in cities across the continent. These tournaments attract some of the leading players from around the world competing in a variety of events including a grueling knockout team game that is as much a test of stamina as bridge expertise.

The illustrated deal occurred in the final round of the team game at a recent NABC. While most of the play in the final was of a high standard, the players showed that even

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El Ojo del Mar / August 2011

at this lofty level, mistakes can (and do!) happen. The bidding began quite normally with North’s opening of 1 spade and South’s response of 2 diamonds which in their system was forcing to at least game.

But at this juncture the commentators could not decide what exactly 4 diamonds meant. Some thought that it was a straightforward jump raise while others felt that it was Roman Keycard Blackwood. If it was the latter, then the response of 5 NT would have shown 2 keycards (the heart ace and the diamond king) plus the diamond queen and a useful void. But whether a void in partner’s first bid suit could be considered useful is highly debatable and it is quite conceivable that at this point North and South were actually on different bidding planets!

In any event, North now threw in a bid of 6 clubs that convinced South they belonged in a grand slam so he promptly bid 7 diamonds which

West just as quickly doubled. As you can see, dear reader, there was just one flaw in this contract, that being the absence of the ace of trumps.

The North-South partnership were naturally crestfallen by this result as the match had been virtually tied at this late stage of the contest and this was very likely a major swing against their side. After all, surely their counterparts at the other table would avoid the same mistakes they had made and arrive at the more sensible small slam contract in diamonds.

But as that esteemed philosopher Yogi Berra noted, it is never over till it’s over and the North-South pair at the other table actually contrived to have their own flight of fancy and actually arrived at the same 7 diamonds contract, though by a slightly different route. But either out of a misguided sense of sportsmanship, or just a feeling that it wouldn’t make any difference, West neglected to make a penalty double and saw his team take a small loss on the board!

There is hope for the rest of us if the world’s great players make mistakes that we and Great Aunt Gladys probably would get right.

Questions or comments: email: masson.ken@gmail.com

KEN MASSON has been playing, teaching and writing about bridge for 35 years. Originally from Dublin, Ireland, Ken has been living in Toronto since 1967. He and his wife and bridge partner, Rosemarie, are now in their third year wintering in Mexico.

BARRA DE NAVIDAD ADS

OUR TWISTED WAY OF SPEAKING

By Tommy Clarkson

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any of us of the maturing set (read “old cusses”) grew up hearing our parents and grandparents employ a variety of rather strange, if not incomprehensible, expressions that we picked up and have also long used.

However, now years later, we all too often find that we really aren’t all that sure of the exact meaning, let alone origin, of such sayings.

I well remember my mother’s mother, “Grammy” – to my cousins and me, our tiny, bundle of endless love, attention and great cookies – saying, “Well, now I’m in a pickle.” By its usage, early on, we were able to reasonably ascertain that this meant she was in a “quandary or difficult position.” But just how did such expression come to be?

It would appear that the phrase may be an allusion regarding a “state of disarray, disorientation or confusion,” such as the case would be for the variety of vegetables often included with pickles. Another source cites its origin as based on the 16th century expression, “de pekel zitten” - “pekel” being the brine or vinegar in which food was prepared. Now how or why one might come to sit in such is anyone’s conjecture!

Yet another expression heard much less these days is that of being “In fine fettle.” “Fettle’, it seems, is an old word meaning “condition, order or state.”

The Old English word for belt was fetel.

Thus, to be “in fine fetel” meant to “gird oneself up, as for an important task.”

How about that rebuke some of us received as children to “Mind your own bee’s wax?” Well, it seems that this, increasingly arcane, expression comes from the days when smallpox was a regular disfigurement. As a result, ladies filled their facial pocks with beeswax, which when faced (no pun intended) with warm weather, worrisomely, might melt. However, inasmuch as it was not proper for one lady to tell another that her makeup required attention, to “mind your own beeswax” came

into being.

A word from my youth that never fails to make me smile is “persnickety.”

According to Merriam-Webster’s dictionary it means – heck I understood that as a five year old! – to be “fussy about small details or fastidious such as a persnickety teacher”. The example of which calls to mind Miss Marsina Pettijohn, my high school English teacher, who cultivated my appreciation for writing and imbued me with a sense of appreciation for the correct utilization of my tools – the words I use. (OK, OK, so I sometimes fail on the latter!) But, before you throw a “conniption fit”, let’s return to the subject of this meander, those more archaic words/expressions from our early days.

Let’s address that last phrase. To “throw a conniption (or hissy/hissie) fit” was, simply, the condition of a violent, emotional, verbal outburst that might be accompanied by overt bodily gestures. So, let’s strive to avoid as many of these as possible, please!

One phrase still occasionally encountered is to be “flabbergasted.” Simply enough, that means to be “struck dumb with astonishment and surprise” . . . like what Patty did when she truly shocked me with a huge, unexpected, birthday party attended by many friends!

How about when we were told to “keep your eyes peeled.” As a child, I understood the intent of this, but it still conjured up potential pain!

Michael Quinion, who writes about the English language, provided a good answer. Apparently, it comes from the 17th century word, “pil” that was commonly spelled peel which meant “to remove or strip” (in the weakened sense) an outer covering, such as from a fruit.

Thus, it took on the figurative sense of keeping alert, by removing any covering of the eye that might impede vision.

Those who are familiar with our shared enjoyment of a good Texas Hold ’em game will appreciate this

last phrase. “The buck stops here” was brought to the common lexicon of the US citizenry by President Harry Truman in the early 1950s. Though money was involved, contrary to what many think the dollar bill is not the object of the phrase!

It is said to have had its origin in the frontier days of poker. A marker, indicating whose deal it was, frequently was a knife with a buckhorn handle. If the player did not wish to deal he (mostly male poker players in those days ya’ know) could pass the responsibility by passing the “buck.” Ultimately, it came to mean a promise of no more excuses made and that the invoker of the expression meant it to show their taking of responsibility for things - rather than pass them on.

So, along with the buck, I stop here!

TOM CLARKSON and his wife have lived on board a boat, on a remote 1.2 square mile island in the Pacific, in the bowels of wartorn Iraq and are now reasonably settled in Santiago, Manzanillo.

One phrase still occasionally encountered is to be “flabbergasted.”

Saw you in the Ojo

11

PUERTO VALLARTA ADS

Notes N o te s F From rom T The he 19 9Thh H Hole ole

By Kim Anders

Putting Problems? Try Moving the Hole!

I

think all of us, golfers and it doesn’t even non-golfers alike, are able have to fly over to understand there is some anything – how tough can that be? degree of difficulty in hitting a Some say this is the hardest part. golf ball where you want it to go.

The thing that makes putting a It doesn’t look that hard but people golf ball difficult is your brain. Unforsure complain a lot tunately, as remarkabout never being It’s like driving your car able as the brain is, able to get the ball with one foot pressing it doesn’t know the to fly over the wafirst thing about ter, turn the same on the accelerator and how to putt a golf direction the hole the other foot press- ball! turns, or bounce How many times ing on the break. away from the sand have you had a instead of into it. downhill putt you knew was very fast But what about putting, the part and you only hit your first putt about of the game where you are only hithalf-way to the hole? Or, you’re faced ting the ball a few yards or less. And, with an uphill putt and you end up

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El Ojo del Mar / August 2011

blowing it way past the hole, leaving you with that tricky little downhill putt?

The problem here is you are allowing your brain to dictate how you stroke the ball. Here’s how the brain works: the brain sees all putts as though they are flat, at least until the last moment when it’s too late.

Your brain knows the ball is 14 feet 6 ½ inches from the hole. You set up to the ball and pull the trigger. The brain and body take over, which is just what you want. You are allowing your body to do what you have trained it to do. “… A long smooth stroke, keep the putter moving through the ball towards the hole….”

You draw the putter back to hit the ball exactly 14 feet 6 ½ inches and then it happens!! Your brain finally kicks in and says, “Wait – this is REALLY FAST so hit it easy!!”

You do your best to slow the putter down so you don’t blow it way past the hole which usually ends up with the putter hitting the ground about the time it gets to the ball. Instead of hitting the ball fourteen six and a half you barely move it half the distance you needed to go even though it is downhill. You know the feeling. It’s like driving your car with one foot pressing on the accelerator and the other foot pressing on the break.

Or, in the case of an uphill putt your brain says, “Wait a minute. This is going to be slow so hit it hard.”

How can you hit it harder when you only took the club back far enough to move the ball 14 feet 6 ½ inches

in the first place? You abandon the smooth stroke for something more like a muscle spasm and stab the ball up the hill about 4 feet past the hole.

If you have ever played golf you can probably relate to these situations and feelings.

If you are one of those, next time you are on the practice green try this. Find a spot that would be a fast downhill putt and play a couple of balls to this hole. Do you feel yourself “hitting the brakes” so you don’t hit it too far? Next, pick a spot that is ½ or ¼ of the way to the hole. This is the target I want you to putt to. You may have a 10 foot putt but you mentally move the hole to a point just 2 feet away. This way you take the putter back to hit the ball 2 feet on a flat green and allow the slope of the hill to take the ball the extra 8 feet.

You can do the same thing with breaking putts, or putts that turn left or right. If you feel the putt will break 5 inches to the left mentally move the hole 5 inches to the right to allow for the right to left slope.

Don’t change your stroke to compensate for the slopes you’ll encounter on the greens. Keep the same stroke and just move the hole so your brain works for you, not against you. A little practice moving the hole around could pay off big time on your scorecard!

KIM ANDERS is the PGA Director of Golf at the Estrella del Mar Golf and Beach Resort in Mazatlan. After 20 years in the mountains of Colorado, Kim and his wife Heather got tired of being cold and fulfilled a dream to live in Mexico.

They live at the resort with their two golden retrievers, Boomer and Duffer.

PUERTO VALLARTA / BUCERIAS / MANZANILLO ADS

GRINGAS G RINGAS & GUACAMOLE GUACAMOLE

By Gail Nott The Gambler

W

eekly, a group of ladies meet to play poker. I was invited to “sit in” and graciously invited to join the ladies the looked forward to making new friends. following week. As I walked home, I reImmediately upon called the words of a accepting the invita- Fortified with margari- famous person. The tion, I realized I had tas, I naively began to name escaped me. never played poker CRS again! “There is and tried to recall believe in my skills. a sucker born every what little I knew of minute.” the game. Winning hands...a “straight,” was that a heterosexual person? A “full house,” was that when all your relatives show up for a visit? A “royal flush,” when the Correctal finally worked? Or “three GAIL NOTT is the author of a kind,” what you have left when the of a book of humor called fourth sock was eaten by the dryer?

Notes from the Loo. She My wallet bulging with coins, I predivides her time between sented myself to the ladies with some Mexico and Tennessee, where she trepidation. Thank God, we were to parhas a turkey farm. take of lunch and happy hour before the game. Fortified with margaritas, I naively began to believe in my skills.

The rules were explained to me. Each new dealer calls their game and every player starts with $5.00 worth of chips.

The first game was five-card draw.

One-eyed jacks and the king with the axe were wild. Frantically, I dug into my purse for my glasses. I had not anticipated I would be required to identify cards by physical handicaps or homicidal tendencies.

The next dealer called out “Spit.”

Glancing round the table, I was mortified that this group of highly educated and well-mannered ladies might obey such a vulgar instruction. Perhaps this was one of the rites of poker. I remembered that baseball players “grab and shift” and football players “pat butts.”

Grabbing the napkin from my lap, I prepared to participate. The hand was dealt; a player called out “Spit” and the next card was placed face up as the wild card. I blushed; luckily, no one had read my thoughts.

Each dealer called a new game: Baseball, Chicago, FieryCross, Shoot the Moon, Hi-Lo. Repeatedly, I had to ask for the specifics of each game. I was certain the ladies suspected that I suffered from CRS (Can’t Remember S…).

Three hours passed. My confidence and stack of chips had both greatly dwindled as the last hand was played.

With words of encouragement, I was

Saw you in the Ojo

13

SAN BLAS ADS

SANTA ANNA – Hero or Villain?

By Shep Lenchek

B

oth revered and reviled, Don Antonio Lopez de Santa Anna caused many problems but cured even more in the first 30 years of Mexican independence.

Today many Mexicans call him a hero and a patriot; others brand him a traitor.

But to North Americans, he is known mainly as the general who destroyed the Alamo.

Yet Santa Anna also played a large role in the creation of modern-day Mexico. He served a staggering number of terms as president of the Republic, eleven times in all over a twenty-year period from 1833 to 1854. Because his turbulent career was marked by frequent shifts in alliances, his detractors have dismissed him as little more than a political chameleon.

His true skill, however, was as a soldier. Many a battle thought hopelessly

14

lost was won through his daring leadership. Yet always he was dogged by his unsavory personal reputation. His numerous amorous affairs, use of opium, temper tantrums and willingness to sell out to the highest bidder have, over the years, seriously tarnished his image, as well as his indisputable achievements.

Born in Jalapa in 1795, Santa Anna grew up in Veracruz. In 1810, he joined the Royal Army of New Spain as a cadet.

His first contribution to Mexican history came in 1821, when he switched sides and abandoned the Spanish effort to destroy those forces that were struggling for independence.

Those forces, first formed by Father Hidalgo in 1810, were now led by Agustin Iturbide. Some say that Santa Anna’s change of heart was triggered by an offer of the rank of colonel in the rebel army, and the command of a province in Veracruz. In any event, he promptly led the rebels to victory.

Without him, the Plan of Iguala (which called for a constitutional monarchy) might never have been implemented. The plan gave Mexico its first taste of self-government; and though as always Santa Anna’s motives were self-serving, he played a large role in ridding Mexico of the Spanish yoke.

Santa Anna’s next “conversion” might as well be his most important.

Earlier, he had pledged his fealty to Iturbide, who rewarded the young officer by promoting him to Brigadier-General and giving him command of the entire state of Veracruz. But lturbide, now having proclaimed himself Emperor Agustin I, soon began to suspect that Santa Anna was conspiring to curb his power. lturbide’s suspicions proved correct.

By 1823, Santa Anna was calling for a democracy, and in league with several other generals, he managed to shatter lturbide’s illusions of grandeur.

But the revolt soon broke into two major factions, the Federalists (who

El Ojo del Mar / August 2011

wanted a federation of strong states) and the Centralists (who demanded a central government), and over the next ten tumultuous years they fought each other for supremacy. Santa Anna, however, played little part in the power struggle. Mistrusted by both sides, he was shuffled off to Yucatan, where he was not allowed to leave his post. Disgruntled, he finally resigned and returned to Mexico city. Soon afterward, he married a girl of fifteen, which created such a scandal he was forced to retire to an hacienda in Veracruz. At age thirty, his career seemed over, his reputation in ruins.

If Santa Anna had done nothing else but drive out the Spanish and open the door to democracy by helping to overthrow the monarchy (no matter any personal motives), his place in Mexican history would be secure. But this was only the beginning.

In 1829 the Spanish again invaded Mexico. Recalled to duty, Santa Anna (with the help of a hurricane) defeated the enemy, forcing them to retreat to Cuba. Now he was a national hero. Despite his being too young at age 37 to

The plan gave Mexico its first taste of self-government; and though as always Santa Anna’s motives were self-serving. legally assume the presidency, he took over the office in 1833. But he soon became bored with the task of governing on a day-to-day basis, and pleading poor health, Santa Anna (while still retaining office) turned the duties over to his vice-president, Gomez Farias. Santa Anna would repeat this stunt four times, always returning to office in times of crisis, then “retiring” when things got dull again.

In 1836, resuming power once more, Santa Anna led a Mexican army into Texas, where he attacked the Alamo, killing every last defender. But within one month, the Mexican Army itself would be defeated at the Battle of San Jacinto, and Santa Anna was himself captured.

Hailed as a hero by Northerners in the U.S. who looked upon the situation In Texas as a Southern scenario to strengthen their position, he was finally taken to meet President Andrew Jackson. Legend has it that while still a prisoner, Santa Anna introduced chewing gum to the United States. In any event, permitted to return to Mexico, he again “retired” from the presidency.

But in 1838 he was called on to turn

back a French invasion of Veracruz. During this campaign, Santa Anna lost a leg. When the war was settled through mediation, he emerged a hero, his past sins forgotten. Thereafter he served as interim president as various claims to power were sorted out. In a very short time, he was in and out of power three times. The third time Santa Anna, apparently weary of playing political musical chairs, established a military dictatorship.

In yet another about-face, the chameleon who had once deplored the practice of sacking the Church now went after its property with a vengeance. He had no other readily convenient source of income, as he had already bankrupted the government. After doing his worst against the Church, it seemed like a good time to again flee the scene of the crime. With his severed leg installed in a magnificent (and costly) cenotaph, Santa Anna picked another stooge to be president and retired to private life.

A little peace and quiet, however, were not on the political menu. In 1844, falling from favor yet again, Santa Anna was banished to Cuba. But he was in exile little more than two years when Mexico again called on him to save the Republic. Once more assuming the powers of the presidency, Santa Anna was given the horrendous task of turning back an invasion by the United States.

Defeated, he was promptly returned to exile.

Amazingly, he would bounce back to power again in 1853, but for the last time. After negotiating the Gadsden Purchase, which called for the sale of the territories of New Mexico and Arizona to the U.S. for a pittance, Santa Anna was branded a traitor, and again exiled.

His last hurrah came in 1867 when he attempted to lead a revolt against Emperor Maximilian. Failing in this, he was deported (again!), but finally came home to Mexico in 1874. Two years later, at age 81, one of history’s most resilient men lost his last battle.

Today many Mexicans still revile his memory. Shakespeare said it best when he wrote that “the evil that men do lives after them; the good is oft interred with their bones.” So it was with Don Antonio Lopez de Santa Anna.

SHEP LENCHEK was in the US Marine Corps during WWII. He and his wife Ruth lived in Mexico for almost 20 years.

GUADALAJARA / TLAQUEPAQUE ADS

By Victoria Schmidt Labor by Hand

S

ometime I take my dog rakes, and push mowers abound. for a walk in the early There are very few power tools morning light just as the used by the workmen I see. Power sun breaks over the horizon. The tools are expensive. They require village is different at this time of electric power or gas to run. Those day. It is quiet. There are very few are expensive as well. Even the vehicles on the road. I may pass an road workers use hand tools. early morning jogger, or another A few days later I find that the dog walker, but I I was surprised when man with the picksee very few peoax at the construcple. One constant a few days later I find tion site is gone, in the half-dark mo- that the man with the and in his place, ments of the early I see a bulldozer. morning are the pick-ax at the con- Surprised, I remempeople who clean struction site is gone, ber all the constructhe streets. in Mexico, with and in his place, I see tion One day I realmen making their ized that late risers a bulldozer. own cement, siftprobably don’t give ing sand through a a second thought to the people strainer screen, moving the sand that rise before the sun and show by wheelbarrow, carrying bricks up at their assigned street to clean it. The workers collect the trash others have carelessly tossed to the ground, and with brooms they sweep the streets. I watch them as they make their way down the street, working meticulously, bagging, bending, sweeping, and bagging some more. It is hard work that is tedious, repetitive and boring. Yet they are there each morning.

As I walked, I wondered how many streets must they clean?

How long do they work? What kind of pay do they get? I understand that there are some streets that they clean, and there are others that they do not. I remembered a street where I used to live that was not cleaned by the village. After walking around and through empty beer bottles, juice or soda cans, and wrappers of all kinds, I finally began to carry a trash bag and a grabber and picked up the trash when I walked my dog.

Later that day, I noticed another Mexican hard at work at a construction site. All alone, he worked with a pick-ax. One man versus hard rock—one strike at a time he labored in the sun. I think of all the Mexicans I see using hand tools.

Mops instead of vacuums, hoes instead of powered tillers, shovels,

by hand; I had reached the point where seeing this was the norm.

A bulldozer moving the earth took me back. Perhaps in the USA standard equipment includes bulldozers along with spinning cement mixers, and jackhammers, electric saws, power hammers, staple guns… yes, this is a different country with its own pace. With all the power and time- saving devices in the USA, why’s everyone always in such a hurry? Mexico has its own way of doing things. There may be

easier ways or quicker ways of doing things, but are they better?

VICTORIA SCHMIDT was a systems supervisor for several documentary film companies. She and her husband Tom moved to Mexico from the Mid-West a few years ago. She has contributed several articles to technical magazines in the US.

Saw you in the Ojo

15

LA MANZANILLA ADS

GUY G UY T TALK ALK K

By Peter E. Gibbons

W

hen they get together, guys usually talk about ing eyes, the sensuous full lips your two things. Well, three if pink tongue moistens while we sports are of interest. If not, then watch, our thoughts who is buying the next round of drinks Although using less and desires condown to your . . . and women. material, the mini- tinue pretty little feet and Ladies, we just love to talk about skirts were so success- toes; so different guys you may you and alas for ful, the Scots even from have noticed. some of us, that’s all The topsy-turvy we can do, talk. But considered raising the years of revelation we do have memo- hem of the kilt. ended when the rag ries, most of us, and trade introduced the “New Look.” It you’re right up front in the check-out became fashionable to dress like a line.

Church Lady with skirts ending just Apart from your enticing, promisa tad above the provocative ankle.

Horrors. Were women attempting to conceal cloven hoofs? And if they were, would that make them more exciting?

Once the fashion designers had secured their cut-in-stone pension plans, they raised the ante and jacked up the skirts to the belly buttons. Although using less material, the mini-skirts were so successful, the Scots even considered raising the hem of the kilt.

The canny Gaelics arranged a meeting of the clans without the presence of Mel Gibson and were able to more or less understand what was being said. And when they

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El Ojo del Mar / August 2011

didn’t, they poured out another wee dram and unanimously supported marketing tartan shorts that would end at below the knees and be promoted as “Bermudas.”

Both fashions proved successful and the Scots celebrated by playing a game of Sunday afternoon cricket wearing them. One can just imagine the excitement this caused at the time.

As the years rolled by, women’s bare legs with exposure anywhere between the ankle and the hip became de riguer. This left the T-men out on their own as the other two, A-men and L-men could often enjoy their preferences simultaneously, most of the time. A gust of powerful air ascending under Marilyn Monroe’s flimsy skirt revealed enough of her secrets to make the scene almost pornographic. It also resulted in her marriage break up. Can you imagine?

I don’t know about the rest of you guys out there but I’m going to test my hypothesis that PV women have the best-shaped legs I’ve seen anywhere in the world.

Although perhaps exposing myself to possible legal infractions, I shall attempt to prove my case that our local gals’ shapely gams were developed by walking on cobble stone streets all of their lives.

That will be my defense in the event I get too close to the subject matter.

PETER GIBBONS owned many businesses in Florida and the U.K. He also worked for several international corporations and has lived in various parts of the world, including the Sudan.

He and his wife settled in Mexico seven years ago.

MANZANILLO ADS

Geo-Mexico:

The Geography and Dynamics of Modern Mexico

By Richard Rhoda and Tony Burton Sombrero Books, B.C., Canada, 2010 A Review by James Tipton

I

have several long shelves that hold books about Mexico. This is, after all, my home, my country, and I want to know as much about it as I can. On top of those shelves is a short shelf, some favorites that I refer to often. I include there a couple of English-Spanish dictionaries as well as The People’s Guide to Mexico by Carl Franz and Lorena Havens, the single book I carried with me years ago in a pack on a much younger back as I wandered around Mexican villages and towns.

I have a few others there as well, like Encyclopedia of Modern Mexico,

by David W. Dent, with its focus on Mexican writers and actors (and with photographs of women I still love: Dolores del Río and Maria Félix).

Today I squeezed those shortshelf books a bit closer, and slipped in Geo-Mexico: The Geography and Dynamics of Modern Mexico, by Richard Rhoda and Tony Burton, a remarkable and very readable study of the 11th largest nation on earth (in terms of population) whose “ecological and cultural richness and global importance” often are not recognized. And, write Richard Rhoda and Tony Burton, geography itself “is also often under-appreciated, equated with memorizing the names of countries, capitals, mountain ranges and rivers. ‘Real’ geography is much more exciting! It focuses on the interactions between individuals, societies and the physical environment in both time and space. Geography looks at the processes behind these interactions and how human activities have helped define them. It also seeks to explain similarities and differences between places.”

The thirty-one well organized chapters begin with “The dynamics of Mexican geography,” followed by chapters like “Earthquakes and volcanoes,” “Water availability, rivers and aquifers,” “Population decline followed by population explosion” (population 106,682,518 as of 2008), Indigenous peoples,” The geogra-

phy of religion,” “Economic activity: is Mexico a world player?,” “500-year transition to an urban society,” “Migration within Mexico,” “Migration to the USA,” “Mexicans in the USA,” “Quality of life in Mexico compared to other countries,” and concluding with “What does the future hold?” It would be a rare reader of El Ojo del Mar who would not be eager to have this book in hand.

Through nutrition, health care education, and some financial assistance, this program helps families overcome poverty.

legiance to the church has declined steadily since 1970. In 1970 96% of the population five years of age and older identified itself as Roman Catholic. By the 2000 census the figure had fallen to 88%.”

In a chapter on the changing political map of Mexico, we are surprised that not only did Texas declare independence from Mexico (1836) but so did (1840 and 1841) the Mexican states of Coahuila, Nuevo León, Tamaulipas, and Yucatán.

Regarding the future? A lot of hope. The Mexican government program Oportunidades “is one of the most-studied social programs on the planet.” Through nutrition, health care education, and some financial assistance, this program helps families overcome poverty.

Through financial incentives to the family, Oportunidades encourages children to attend school, and after completion of each grade, the family is rewarded with additional incentives. Only 4% of the administrative budget of $3.6 billion dollars goes toward administration. Five million families are helped (about 1/4th of all Mexican families), mostly in marginal communities. “In eleven years what has been achieved? Enrollment in junior high schools has risen 30% for 14-year-olds. The graduation rate from high schools is 23% higher.” Exciting!

Richard Rhoda and Tony Burton, both residents of Mexico, are well known for their writings about Mexico, too extensive to list here. This joint effort, Geo-Mexico: The Geography and Dynamics of Modern Mexico, is a “must have” book for those of us hooked on this magnificent country.

Rhoda and Burton have also provided “More than 100 original maps, graphs and diagrams” and “Over 50 text boxes highlight illustrative examples and case studies.”

In a chapter on population, we discover that Mexico is the most population-dense country in the Americas: 55 people/square kilometer compared to USA at 31, Bolivia at 8, and Canada at 3. We learn that Mexican life expectancy in the 1930s was only 37 years, compared to 75 years today. And we learn that (fortunately) fertility rates have plummeted from eight children on average per woman in the 1950s to 2.1 on average in 2010.

In a chapter on religion we find that although “the population remains predominantly Catholic, al-

Saw you in the Ojo

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MANZANILLO / GUADALAJARA / AJIJIC ADS

PRAGUE-Pay P RAGUE-Pay tto oP Pee ee a and nd S Stand tand tto oE Eat at

By Carol L. Bowman

W

e hopped on the subway at Zelivskếho, hauling a map, a sense of adventure and mild anxiety. We had to count the number of stops, as pronouncing Czech Republic street names remained an unappealing task. My tongue twisted from a tangle of v’s, k’s, z’s and h’s common in the Slovak languages. As the train car passed Jiřího z Podĕbrad, Nám Míru and Hlávni Nadrażni stations, we shuffled off with the locals at Mustek, dizzy.

The hotel concierge warned us that, with over 4 million yearly visitors, Prague suffered from cus-

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El Ojo del Mar / August 2011

tomary tourist rip-offs, which he called, ‘Czech tricks.’ “Watch out for gypsies who linger in underground stations and the crowded ‘Old Town’ center, waiting to lighten your Czech Krowns from pocket or purse. Never get into a taxi before first settling on the fare and never say ‘thank you’ to a waiter when handing over money for a bill.

That’s considered a done deal and no change will be returned.”

We donned vests with zippered pockets, hid our Krowns (Kc’s for short) in pick proof places, grabbed the list of ‘must sees’ and set off to explore Prague, a political, cultural and economic center of Europe for over 1100 years. Gothic and Renaissance architecture, sites reflecting the permanent seat of two Holy Roman Emperors, the Hapsburg Monarchy and the Austro-Hungarian Empire, waited to dazzle. The Charles Bridge, built in 1357 by Charles IV and Prague Castle, dating from 885 topped the list.

A pedestrian zone emerged as we climbed from two stories below street level. Narrow flags attached to an 18th century Neoclassical building, grabbed our attention. The only recognizable word, ‘Casino.’ waved in the breeze.

We avoided slinking into these post-Communist era money pits in Poland and Hungary, but this one lured us inside. We reshuffled the list and put ‘history’ on hold; first things, first, money to be made.

We headed through the ground floor McDonald’s, then climbed up threadbare carpeted stairs to the gaming rooms, which oozed with old European finery.

The roulette table beckoned, amid crystal chandeliers, musty velvet black-out curtains and a quiet elegance; no glitzy gambling here. We plunked down some Czech Krowns on favorite numbers and within 20 minutes, both my husband and I had doubled our money.

MANZANILLO ADS

Winnings tucked away, our whetted appetites needed food before taking on centuries of history.

The square was lined with charming outdoor cafés, but a perusal of menus and prices suggested that we would have to make more trips to the casino just to eat. A simple hamburger cost a staggering 390 Kc; which at a rate of 17 to $1US equaled $23, fries extra.

Momentarily flush with casino Krowns, we selected an eatery that displayed small, wooden stands with extended pegs holding salty pretzels, on each table. How quaint, we thought. In Mexico, chips and salsa grace restaurant tables. Here in Prague, pretzels make a perfect starter with an icy tap of Czech beer. After we ordered, the waitress slapped down two tiny strips of paper with ‘toalet’ printed on each. I didn’t pay any attention; big mistake.

My husband, Ernie, innocently crunched on the pretzels while I devoured a ham and cheese panini. When I asked for the bill, I was prepared for the ‘thank you trick’.

The waitress, who spoke some English, arrived with a calculator in hand. She punched and crunched so many numbers, I felt woozy. She started with 475 Kc’s for the sandwich and 2 beers; then she counted the pretzels on the stand. “Sir, you ate 4 pretzels. That’s 50 Kc’s per pretzel, another 200. There’s the ‘sitting fee’ of 50 Kc’s per person, and Madame, you had mustard; that’s another 25 Kc’s, making the total 800 Czech Krowns.”

I felt slammed, smacked around and tricked. “I see no sign saying there’s a pretzel charge. That’s $3USD each. A sitting fee, are you serious? We ate, we didn’t just sit,” I argued. No matter that I was paying with winnings. I hated being ‘gouged.’

“Madame, what can I do, my boss is crazy. These are the prices,” she lied with smiling satisfaction. I forked over 800Kc’s, the entire amount of my casino booty.

I needed a bathroom, as the beer and financial drubbing brought on a sense of urgency. After weaving through the maize of rooms inside the restaurant and down two flights of stairs to the Damas, I encountered a stern looking Czech woman wearing a babushka. “You need toalet pass. No pass, no pay, no pee.”

I remembered that ignored slip of paper, lying on the table two

stories up. “I forgot the pass, it’s upstairs. We already paid the bill,” I begged.

“No pass, no pee,” she echoed.

She knew those words quite well.

My bladder couldn’t tolerate another round trip, so I paid to pee.

Throughout Eastern Europe, there wasn’t one free public restroom. To pay at a restaurant, however, after the bill beating, bordered on absurd.

We drifted a half block to Wenceslas Square and stumbled upon two food kiosks, positioned on opposite corners of the huge plaza.

An array of sausages, called klobasá hung from thin wires stretched atop the service areas. Inside the open air kitchens, these foot long beauties sizzled on rotating grills.

Lines of locals waited to order. Others gathered around a nearby metal stand-up table, eating.

“This is an Anthony Bourdain moment,” my husband shouted with boyish glee.

“Remember when he explored Prague for the Travel Channel? He ate at one of these exact stands. I can hear him saying, ‘Only eat with the locals. Get yourself to one of the sausage kiosks and go no further, because King Wenceslas loved sausage.’”

For the price of one pretzel, Ernie inhaled a smoked klobasá, served with a slab of crusty rye bread and a dollop of spicy brown mustard. A Smazĕny Syr, fried cheese on a bun, soothed my inners after that pricey panini. We stood for free with the Czechs, feasted on the local fare and laughed. Sausages solved the price gouging and sitting fees.

In just a few hours, we learned Prague’s basic rules of sustenance.

Count the stops, play to win, pay to pee, stand to eat and stay away from pretzels.

CAROL BOWMAN worked in a psychiatric hospital for 33 years before moving to Mexico in 2006. Visiting 45 countries before retirement, Carol’s outlet of travel writing helped preserve her sanity. She was a featured author in the published anthology, Tales from the Couch V.

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PUERTO VALLARTA ADS

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El Ojo del Mar / August 2011

GUADALAJARA ADS

Hearts at Work A Column by James Tipton

“…in respect to fellowship….”

I

n a rather fine film, Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World, Capt. Jack Aubrey, played by Russell Crowe, master and commander of the British ship Surprise, has orders to chase down and capture or destroy a much larger French ship in the lonely waters off the coast of Brazil in 1804. A young midshipman named Hollom is a misfit among these rough and sometimes difficult-to-discipline men. Late one night the lonely and disconsolate Hollom lifts up a cannon ball, cradles it against his stomach, and jumps into the deep blue.

The following morning Capt. Jack calls his men to the upper deck for a short service. Setting aside the Bible offered to him he says simply but eloquently: “The simple truth of it is not all of us become the men we once thought we might be. We are all God’s creatures.

And if there are those among us who thought ill of Mr. Hollom, or spoke ill of him, or failed him in respect to fellowship we ask Your forgiveness.”

“In respect to fellowship,” is there any among us who has not failed others? Or thought ill of others, or spoke ill of others? Only yesterday, while leaving our bi-monthly Ajijic Writers luncheon, I was reminded by someone for whom I have the highest regard of the Buddhist commitment to: Right thought. Right speech. Right action.

Yet how easy it is to ignore those who, like Midshipman Hollom, do not “fit”. How easy it is to laugh at them, to scorn them, to scoff at them, to put them down, to turn our backs when they want to be with us, as if the limitations or failures we perceive in them are of such magnitude that at least for the moment we might ignore our own limitations and failures. Indeed, when seen in a higher light than that of ordinary day, those opening words of Capt.

Jack Aubrey fall like a hard rain upon all of us: “The simple truth of it is not all of us become the men we once thought we might be.”

In literature the Misfit is not the same as the Outsider (Mersault, in Camus’ The Stranger, for example) or the Hero (Odysseus in Homer’s The Odyssey, for example), for both the Outsider and the Hero do not define themselves in terms of what others think of them or how they are accepted. But true Outsiders and Heroes are rare. Misfits are common, and most of us have experienced being misfits, not fitting in the way we might hope to fit in.

Often in literature and film, the idea of the misfit is dramatized through appearance.

The hunchback in Hugo’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame is deformed, grotesque, laughed at, considered a fool. So ugly that shortly after his birth he had been deposited on the steps of Notre Dame where he was raised by a tormented and sexually repressed priest. I like the 1996 version in which Mandy Patinkin plays the hunchback Quasimodo; Richard Harris the Archdeacon of Notre Dame, Dom Frollo; and a very young Salma Hayek the gypsy girl Esmeralda, who with no effort at all bewitches everyone.

Quasimodo, the monstrously misfit, becomes the hero, swinging down on the bell ropes to rescue Esmerada as she is being led to the gallows after being falsely charged with murder. I like equally well the 1939 version with Charles Laughton as Quasimodo and Cedrick Hardwick as the Archdeacon, and the 19-year-old Irish beauty Maureen O’Hara as Esmeralda in her first American role (she had just completed her first major film in England a few

months earlier—Jamaica Inn—also with Laughton).

In the old fairy tale, Beauty and the Beast, the “misfit” is a beast, literally, and yes hideous, but we come to realize his heart is bigger than any of the hearts around him. Beauty slowly discovers she loves him, and finally, as he is dying, she kisses him, expecting nothing in return. With that kiss the beast comes back to life, now transformed into a handsome prince, and they live happily ever after.

The truth hidden in this story is this: we discover that when we can love, expecting nothing in return, our lives are transformed. What we formerly saw as ordinary—or in the case of this old story even far worse than ordinary— suddenly is transformed into something magnificent. The old black and white film version directed by Jean Cocteau, La belle et la bête (1946), is worth watching. The belle, the beauty, is initially horrified by la bête, but as she gives him more and more of her attention, more and more she begins to see the remarkable soul beneath the grotesque exterior.

All whom we meet, including misfits, have remarkable souls, usually deeply hidden. By giving appar-

ent misfits our attention (complete attention being symbolized by the kiss in Beauty and the Beast), their world (which we suddenly realize is our world as well) becomes a bit more beautiful.

Like Capt Jack says, “We are all God’s creatures.”

JIM TIPTON has published several books of poetry and has sold dozens of articles to magazines in the US. His collections of poetry include Letters from a Stranger (1998)— winner of the Colorado Book Award in Poetry. Jim lived in Puerto Vallarta for several years. spiritofmexico@yahoo.com

So ugly that shortly after his birth he had been deposited on the steps of Notre Dame where he was raised by a tormented and sexually repressed priest.

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Movies On My Mind

By Danny Dominguez CARS For Sale: Mercedes 1982 SD500 Turbo Charged 5 Cylinder Diesel, needs works to restore it to its classic status $3,500 pesos or best offer. NO e-mail, please call: (387)763-3266 For Sale: Excellent Convertible.

Imported, Mexican plates, insurance paid for 2011, taxes and importation paid until 2010. Motor 2.5 ltrs, working great. new tires, new shock, magnesium rhins, $35,000 pesos, for appointment call Luis at cell 331113-6192 For Sale: or trade 1999 Chevy van and 6X12 enclosed trailer. California Title. 42000 original miles $6000.00 US for both or will trade for a Jeep or Jeep type vehicle email: mlhwarior@yahoo.com For Sale: MOTORHOME 1983 Winnebago Minnie Winnie class C 1984 model in great condition Its U.S. plated in South Dakota. $5,000 dollars OBO Call for Larry at cell.

331 218 9649 For Sale: 1993 Mercury Villager, 7 passenger van, automatic, A/C blows cold, 154,000 miles, cloth interior, clean, one owner, U.S. plated, $3,995U.S. call: (376) 763-5367 For Sale: 2005 Ford Taurus, runs good, needs somebody work, reduced from $67,000 to $44,000 pesos or USD, please call John (376)765-2726

GENERAL MERCHANDISE For Sale: Ryobi tool kit 18 volt complete with drill, sawzall, lantern, circular saw and charge. Extra battery included $2,400 pesos, contact Pete @ 333 490-5812 For Sale: Metal detector with headphones $3,400 pesos, contact Pete @333-490-5812 For Sale: Compressor, 100 psi portable and compact with air chuck; $1,000 pesos, contact Pete @333490-5812 For Sale: Floor jack 4500 lbs perfect condition, $850 pesos, contact Pete @ 333-490-5812 For Sale: Portable Massage Table with face cradle, carrying case. $2000 pesos, e-mail: spaldinghi@ hotmail.com For Sale: A Morgan Brand that holds 4 people, 5 years old, but never used, wooden frame, pump has been checked and is in mint condition, $15,000 nmp, call (376) 7664086

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For Sale: Philosophical Books: Gurdjieff + Ouspensky; Helena Blavatsky; Ernest Holmes, etc, call Lucky Dave at cell 331-012-3396 For Sale: Restaurant equipment: cooking stoves, refrigeration, vent system, pots, pans, etc, call Lucky Dave at cell 331-012-3396 For Sale: Casio Portable electric organ w/hard case and collapsible stand, 12v/120v adaptor synthesized instruments, back up rythums, digital recorder, earphone jack allows for privacy. Very lightly used, new condition $2500 pesos. No email, please call Lee Borden at cell 333-496-5883 For Sale: Bar Style Table.

Round 30” diameter laminated top on 42” high metal pedestal base. Includes 3 tall, wooden, swivels stools w/back rests and brass foot rails.

Excellent conditions $3500 pesos.

No e-mail, please call Lee Borden at (045) 333-496-5883 For Sale: Tracker Tundra 20 Boat, 280,000.00 or 25,000.00 USD. Really nice boat, 20ft long, capacity up to 9 people, GPS fishfinder email with any questions! e-mail: juliana109@hotmail.com

COLLECTABLES For Sale: Box cameras (early 1900s), the very first Polaroid Model 95 (1948), German Finetta 1950 35mm, Eumig C3 Austrian 1959 3-lens turret 8mm with case & instruction manual, email: justmeinmexico@hotmail.com For Sale: Incredible collection of 750 different Mexican stamps, all pictorial, all mint and never hinged.

Only $200, call James Tipton, (376) 765-7689.

For Sale: Harley Davidson touch lamp, new in box $400 pesos.

No e-mail, please call Lee Borden at Cell 333-496-5883 For Sale: Small kitchen appliances: Molinex juicer $380 pesos; Krups espresso & cappuccino machine $720 pesos; Rival ice cream maker $630 pesos; electric fryer $430 pesos. Call: (387)763-0432.

For Sale: Motorcycle 2009 Dinamo Custom 150cc like new. Less than 3000 km, never wrecked. All taxes paid. Includes two helmets. $21,000 pesos. Check out at www. dinamotos.com for specs and pictures. Call: (376) 766-1757

El Ojo del Mar / August 2011

E

ver wondered why certain movies stay with you for a lifetime, while others, though undeniably distinguished, fade away like the proverbial old soldier? One reason, I think, is that our favorite films strike some hidden chord in our psyche, and having done so, subtly suggest that we write a sequel to the story, with ourselves in the central role.

These sequels invariably speak to our deepest desires; hence the movies are something of a Rorschach test. Take Gone With the Wind. Have you always hoped that Scarlett and Rhett might someday get back together? Or do you feel he was well rid of that crazy, conniving (albeit fascinating) bitch? Better that old Rhett end up with the sporting-house madam, Belle Watling, than Scarlett, who sooner or later would surely have driven him either onto the welfare rolls, or into an insane asylum.

Another example: at the end of Casablanca, Rick and Captain Renault walk off into the mist, headed for a Free French garrison. Rick, having earlier sent Ilsa away with her husband, is left with the satisfaction of having made a noble sacrifice. Now, for a couple of possible sequels: As our gay friends might fantasize, Rick and Renault becomes lovers and later operate a highly successful interior decorating business in Beverly Hills; or my favorite choice, Rick and Ilsa meet in the U.S. after her husband has died a hero’s death. Later, in partnership with Bugsy Siegel, they open the Flamingo Casino in Las Vegas. Gambling was, after all, Rick’s business back in North Africa and there’s nothing more tedious to watch (or for that matter, experience) than starting all over again from scratch.

I’d rather study the mating habits of porcupines. But what my own choice among these options reveals relative to the state of my mental health, I’ll leave to more analytical minds than mine.

Speaking of which, a psychiatrist once wrote a marvelous book called Mov-

Mind d wherein he attempted to ies on My Mind, “analyze” many of the personages in several motion pictures. Among his patients were the aforementioned “Rick” in Casablanca, and the title character in Citizen Kane. What was most enlightening about the book was the good doctor’s notion that great film characters invariably resonate with some often unconscious longing on the part of the spectator.

Personally, I have always been intrigued with movies which expressed the theme that while we have little if any control over fate, we can certainly dictate how we chase our fortunes, as well as the manner in which we try to gracefully accept our luck, be it good, bad or simply (worst of all?) neutral.

As a boy growing up in West Texas, my hero was Charles Lindbergh, the first man to fly solo across the Atlantic. An incredible achievement, it gave rise to the airline industry as we know it today. Yet even as a kid, I sensed that what had driven Lindbergh on was not the dream of riches or even long-lasting fame, but rather his thirst for adventure, for even if he had not succeeded, his courageous failure would have forever defined his character.

Many years later, a cluster of nowclassic movies would confirm this notion of mine. In several of these films, the protagonists found not what they so desperately craved, but instead what they had never known they truly needed. These characters have stayed with me for a lifetime: my movie mentors, whose faces will never grow old, whose personal style will never fall out of vogue, whose timeless lessons can never be lost.

Great film characters invariably resonate with some often unconscious longing.

DANNY DOMINGUEZ is a former screenwriter and lawyer who has lived for several years in San Luis Potosi, where he spends much of his time giving free legal advice to ex-pats.

AJIJIC/ CHAPALA

Friends of México A.C. (FOM) MAZATLAN SUPPORTS STUDENTS WITH NEEDED SCHOOL SUPPLIES

NON-PROFIT ORGANIZATIONS

Lakeside Little Theatre 47th Season My husband and I retired and moved to Mazatlan three years ago. We wanted to join an organization that was social, but also did service for the community.

Friends of Mexico’s mission statement is “To be a community minded organization that supports the education of students in impoverished schools of Mazatlan and seeks to enhance the experience of its members living in Mazatlan.” This is just what we wanted and have been involved with ever since. I am now the chairperson of the Foundation, the service part of Friends of Mexico.

Friends of Mexico started out in 1998 as a social group, but many members wanted to do more and an effort was made to find a needy school that could use some assistance. Our first school was Sor Juana Ines de la Cruz. We started by supplying the first graders with uniforms, shoes and a back pack full of supplies.

We felt if the first graders had a good start they would continue throughout their school years. This worked well as the enrollment at Sor Juana Ines de la Cruz grew.

We next supplied all the grades with supplies and shirts. Over the years we added more school under our wings. Jose Felipe Valle, Josefina Osuna Perez, both Matutino (morning) and Vesperino (afternoon) Vicente Guerrero, both Matutino and Verpertino. Teniente Jose Azueta and our newest school Constitucion. We stopped giving out shirts and shoes and concentrate on just giving school supplies. This year we are trying to give students that have graduated from the 6th grade at our schools the supplies they will need to go into secundaria or junior high. We are proud to say we are helping over 2,156 students.

We are able to buy the supplies

with money received from membership dues and fundraisers.

Also if you check our web-site www. friendsofmexicoac.org one can donate under “Be an Angel” program.

We get bids for the best prices and buy in bulk. We give supplies twice a year, in August when school starts and then again in January as a refresher. Here is an example of what we give, pencils, erasers, pencil sharpeners, rulers, colored pencils, red/blue pencils, highliters, modeling clay, scissors, glue sticks, pens, dictionaries, geometric sets and notebooks. We also give the teachers white board markers and cleaner supplies, staplers and staples, masking tape, poster boards and reams of paper. Some schools have a wish list and we have been able to help them with special needs.

We receive many outside donations from people all over who want to do their small bit to help.

We gladly receive crayons, used or thick pencils, colored markers, art supplies, colored paper etc. We sort these supplies and either give them to our schools, use them in our ESL program (another article), give them to two nursery schools near our schools or to Casa Down a school for Down Syndrome children. Casa Down needs the thick crayons and pencils.

“Giving out school supplies supports the first part of our Mission Statement, to support the education of students in impoverished schools”, but it also helps with the second part, “to enhance the experience of its members living in Mexico.” As any member will tell you; going out to the schools and handing a child supplies, seeing the smile on their face, hearing them say thankyou and giving you a big hug is a heart-warming experience that one will remember forever.

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Oct 1-9 The Kitchen Witches By Carolyn Smith Nov 5-13 Clue?-The Stage Play Adapted By Anne O’Neemuss Dec 10-18 Greetings!

By Tom Duszick Jan 14-22 How The Other Half Loves By Alan Ayckbourne Feb 25 Mar 6 Chicago

By Kande, Ebb & Fosse Apr 7-15 Sex Please, We’re Sixty By Michael & Susan Parker

Individual Tickets $200, musical $250 Paula Mctavish mctavish@ prodigy.net.mx (376) 766-0954 (Leave Message) MAS Musical Schedule •

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Oct 18 Blas Galindo Orchestra Featuring Rodrigo’s “Concerto Andaluz” Nov 15 Ballet Classical & Neoclassical of Jalisco Dec 18 Children’s Choir of Morelia Jan 19 San Luis Obispo Philharmonic Orchestra Feb 14 “Classical FX” Washington D.C. Opera Company Quartet

Info/Tickets- Beverly Denton (376) 765-6409

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International Friendship Club IFC Cleft Palate Program

By Janie Albright Blank The International Friendship Club (IFC) has been a mainstay of charitable giving and charitable activity in Puerto Vallarta for over 25 years.

Our 400 members donate their time, their energy and their money to help those less fortunate in this city we all love, Puerto Vallarta. Over time the Cleft Palate Program has come to signify what the IFC is all about. At any given time there are almost 200 area children afflicted with cleft lips and palates, from birth to 18 years of age being treated by doctors, nurses, speech therapists, dentists and others at no cost to the recipients. 9 month old patient named The doctors donate their time and the IFC pays Aileth Guadalupe a few months after surgery to all other expenses. In the past the Regional Hosclose her lip. pital has donated their surgery space and hospital beds to make sure this program continued to function for the benefit of these citizens of Puerto Vallarta and vicinity. Right now this is up in the air because the Regional Hospital has not been able to accommodate our program for the clinic and surgeries normally performed in May. These deserving children are left waiting while a solution is sought to resolve this most serious problem. Patricia Mendez, Medical and Cleft Palate Program Coordinator and Susan Davalos, Community Relations Chairperson for the IFC are working with the US Consul, Kelly Trainor to try and find an alternate solution.

While they wait we are summarizing an article that describes services as they have been administered in the past.

Each February an Informe is held to acquaint IFC members and interested members of the public about the Cleft Palate and Surgery Program. Sponsored by the International Friendship Club (IFC), Dr. Ezequial Fuentes and his team arrive from Guadalajara four times each year to perform these life-changing surgeries and have been doing so for over twenty years. Unfortunately there is never a shortage of patients in this program. As a matter of fact there were two new babies born with cleft palates in the Regional Hospital the day we arrived for the clinic. Dr. Fuentes and his team treated 187 patients here in 2010. And over the last twenty years there have been 825 surgeries and 3125 clinic visits! Thanks to everyone who is a member of the IFC or has ever gone on our weekly Wednesday and Thursday Home Tours! Without your support this program would not be possible.

At any given time there are children from infancy to adulthood in various stages of repair. In order to make a child whole there needs to be a variety of specialties involved. Required are the skills of the surgeon closing the palate and the lip and performing plastic surgery, anesthesiologists, odontologists and orthodontists, pediatricians and speech therapists. Most children will see the speech therapist twice a week for many years. Surgeries can range from a couple to as many as 15! Fortunately for the children and families of Vallarta the IFC is able to

PUERTO VALLARTA

bring these services into our community at no charge to the family. Frequent trips to Guadalajara would be out of the question for most of our patients.

WISH LIST The IFC helps to meet the needs of folks in the Puerto Vallarta Community.

If you are coming by plane, train, boat or car, you can tuck some of the following wish list items into your luggage. They can be brought to the Clubhouse, or contact the office at 322 - 222 - 5466 to make arrangements. We keep an updated list of items needed on our website at ifcvallarta. com. Please check before you come down.

Gracias!

The IFC is people working together for the community. We need: BABY CLOTHES: Newborn sizes Receiving blankets Diapers

Couple visiting from the US brought 30 sets of much needed colored pencils to the IFC.

MEDICAL Beanie babies Stuffed animals Small dolls Spanish videos on nutrition, healthcare, hygiene, dental care TV/VCR or TV/DVD combo for teaching COMMUNITY SERVICES Books for children in Spanish - all ages Child size walker Children’s underwear and white socks Large collapsible strollers for kids with cerebral palsy Dental supplies, toothbrushes, dental floss Shoes and clothes for children ages 6 - 14 .

Stroller type wheelchairs for older children Teaching videos in Spanish (nutrition, diabetes, general health, hygiene, etc) Vitamins for children and adults Watercolors, fine paint brushes, art supplies Wheelchairs EDUCATION Band-aids Calculators Children’s Books-Spanish Children’s scissors Colored pencils Crayons Erasers Watercolors, fine paint brushes, art supplies The International Friendship Club is a registered charitable organization in Mexico listed as Club Internacional de la Amistad.

Location: Edificio Parian del Puente #13, Calle Libertad Corner Miramar Colonia El Centro, PUERTO VALLARTA, Jalisco, Mexico, 48300.

Phone: 322-222-5466 Website: ifcvallarta.com Email: ifcvallarta@gmail.com

Dr. Fuentes and his team performing a cleft palate surgery at the Regional Hospital in February 2011.

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El Ojo del Mar / August 2011

Service

THE OJO CROSSWORD

DIRECTORY ART GALLERIES - THE AJIJIC ART HOUSE Tel: (376) 765-5097

NOTARY Pag: 18

AUTOMOTIVE

BANK INVESTMENT

Pag: 02

Pag: 05

COMMUNICATIONS - MAILBOXES, ETC. Tel: (322) 224-9434

Pag: 08

CONSTRUCTION/ARCHITECTS - ARCHITECTURAL DESIGN/CONSTRUCTION Arq. Juan Jose Rodriguez Tel: (322) 225-8248 Pag: 20

DENTIST - PATY ASCENCIO D.D.S. Tel: (669) 668-0548 Pag: 09 - SMILES AT VALLARTA-Dr. Alberto Hernández Tel: 223 9648 Pag: 13

Pag: 10 Pag: 17 Pag: 12 Pag: 15 Pag: 20 Pag: 15

- BARRAREALTY Tel: (315) 355-5748 - COLDWELL BANKER MANZANILLO Tel: (314) 334-2000 - FOR SALE BY OWNER Tel: (333) 899-2827 - INTER-MEX REALTY Cell: (044) 315-100-8869 - JEFF KLASSEN Mex Cell: 315-104-4951 - MAZATLAN PROPERTY GROUP Tel: 985-3065 - MEXICO PROPERTY RESOURCES Tel: (315) 351-7489, 108-3425 - RE/MAX - PERLA PACIFICO Tel: (314) 333-2904 - REENA EGGER Cell: (322) 173-8712 - VALLARTA ESCAPES Tel: (322) 297-0139

- SANTANA RENTALS Cell: (315) 104-3283

- CASA DELLA PIZZA Tel: (314) 333 6010 - BILLY BOB’S Tel: (323) 113-6732 - JOLANDAS Tel: (315) 351-5449 - JUANITOS Tel: (314) 333-1388 - ESCONDIDA SPORT BAR Tel: 222-1590 - THE RED CABBAGE CAFE Tel: (322) 223-0411

Pag: 12

- VALLARTA BOTANICAL GARDENS Tel: (322) 223-6182

- JAIMAH Tel: (322) 22 121 98, 333 791 0550, (329) 29 836 79, (314) 333 6700 Pag: 13

MEDICAL SERVICES Pag: 08

MOVERS - BALDERAS Tel: 01 (33) 3810-4859 - SEYMI Tel: 01 (33) 3603-0000, 3603-0256

Pag: 07 Pag: 21

* MUSIC/THEATRE - BALLET FOLCLORICO DE LA UdeG

Pag: 19 Pag: 05 Pag: 10 Pag: 11 Pag: 09 Pag: 16 Pag: 03 Pag: 10 Pag: 20

RENTALS

INTERIOR DESIGN

HOSPITAL ANGELES DEL CARMEN Tel: 01 (33) 3813-0042

Pag: 11

Pag: 16

Pag: 17 Pag: 14 Pag: 03 Pag: 03 Pag: 12 Pag: 13

TOURIST ATTRACTIONS

LAWYER - FFF LAW OFFICES Tel: (33) 3616 3749

Pag: 06

RESTAURANTS/CAFES/BAR

HOTELS / SUITES - CIELO ROJO Tel: (311) 258-4155 - HOTELITO ESCONDIDO Tel: 01 33-3719-2395 - LA MISSIÓN Tel: (322) 222-7104, (322) 222-4822 - LA MANSION DEL SOL Tel: 01 800 715 9339 - LOS CUATRO VIENTOS Tel: (322) 222-0161 - QUINTA DON JOSE Tel: 01-800-700-2223

- MANZANILLOGURU.COM Nextel: (314) 12 03 974, ID 62*160932*2

REAL ESTATE

BOUTIQUE - LA BOHEMIA Tel: (322) 222-3164

Pag: 18

PERSONAL ASSISTANCE

- MOBILE DIAGNOSTIC & REPAIR SERVICE Cell: 333-506-7879 Pag: 18

- BBVA BANCOMER Tel. 01-800-2282-728

- NOTARIA 1 - Raúl Gordillo Tel: (314) 332-1611

Pag: 03

ACROSS

DOWN

1 After shower need 6 Salad 10 Alter 14 Short poem 15 Spring flower 16 Goddess 17 Rank 18 Convex shape 19 Part of the eye 20 Utilize 21 European monetary unit 23 City 25 Object 26 Hotel 27 Disinherit 30 Peeved 34 Japanese city 35 Air pollution 36 Ex-serviceman 38 Adhesive 39 United Parcel Service 40 Athletic field 42 Part of a min.

43 Just 44 Capital of Byelorussia 45 Doctor’s tool 48 Tenant 49 Unrefined metal 50 Select 51 Whines the ___ 54 Winnie the ____ 55 Traveler’s aid 58 S.A. Indian 59 Ogled 61 Leaven 63 Heavenly light 64 Scallion 65 Asian country 66 Italian boy’s name 67 Syllables used in songs (2 wds.)

68 Lone-Star State

1 Thousand (abbr.)

2 Paddles 3 Roomy 4 Strech to make do 5 Decoy (2 wds.)

6 Finish milkshake 7 Type of car 8 Loose gown worn at mass 9 44th state of the union 10 Informal hockey 11 Lotion brand 12 Little Mermaid’s love 13 Clean 22 Pot 24 Card game 25 Cola 27 Canines 28 Islands 29 Pert 30 Plenteous 31 Prying 32 Levels 33 Compact 35 Made music vocally 37 Acquire 40 Purple quartz 41 Ascend 43 Pronoun 46 Prayer beads 47 Anger 48 Lavatory 50 Russian liquor 51 Punching implement 52 To 53 Rake 54 Rind 55 Philosopher Carl 56 East 57 Parent teacher groups 60 Affirmative 62 Ogle

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Pag: 27

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25

BARRA DE NAVIDAD COSTA ALEGRE ROTARY- Meetings: Wednesdays, 9:00 am, Cabo Blanco Hotel, www.costalegre-rotary.org.

MANZANILLO MUJERES AMIGAS LUNCHEONS- Monthly throughout the year, first Wednesday of each month, El Caribe Restaurant, 1:00 pm.

Contact: Candy King, 044-314-103-0406, candyk@coldwellbankerbienesraices.com THIRSTY THURSDAYS – MANZAMIGOS- Weekly throughout the year, to be announced each week – www.manzamigos.com, 6:00 pm. Contact: Gerry Szakacs, manzamigos@gmail.com, to join: Shime Dawson, collectors140@yahoo.com AMIGOS POR UN REFUGIO ANIMAL EN MANZANILLO AC – Monthly throughout the year, third Wednesday, Hotel Playa Santiago, 11:30 am. Contact Debi Teter 314-376-5974. ara.mzlo@yahoo.com.

MAZATLAN AMERICAN LEGION- meet the 3rd Tues. 1pm at the Olas Atlas Steakhouse. Call Ed Cunningham, Commander, Tel. 136-0773, paradise1940@aol.com AMIGOS DE LOS ANIMALES- To report injured, abandoned domestic animals, adopt pets or to find information at Tel. 986-4235 FRIENDS OF MEXICO- 2nd Tues. 10am at the Vineyard Church on Camarón Sabalo north of the Panama Bakery in the Golden Zone. Social hour 9am. www.friendofmexicoac.org HANDS ACROSS THE BORDERS- Meetings 2nd Friday of the month 9am at The Vineyard for coffee or breakfast.

MAZATLAN MEMBERSHIP LIBRARY-A non-profit with both English and Spanish titles. Summer hours Mon-Fri 10am to 2pm. Tel. 982-3036, mazlibrary@gmail.com NORTH ROTARY CLUB- Meets every Tues. night 8:30pm at El Cid clubhouse.

CENTER ROTARY CLUB- Meets every Tues. at 8 am in the Agua Marina Hotel.

WEST ROTARY CLUB- Meets every Thurs. night at 8:30pm at the Agua Marina Hotel.

TRES ISLAS ORPHANAGE FUNDS- Serving Orfanatorio Mazatlán Salvation Army Home for Children, Father Tovar’s Home for Boys (Hogar San Pablo), Ciudad de los Niños, and FloreSer. One hundred percent of your donations tax deductible. Please visit www.orphanagefunds.org BOYS HOME (HOGAR SAN PABLO)- Paseo del Centenario #9 Centro, Tel. 982-3720 MAZATLAN ORPHANAGE- Zaragoza #227-A Centro Tel. 981-2214 President Cristina Peña de Herrera.

SALVATION ARMY HOME FOR CHILDREN- Major Frizzell Tel. 980-7609 HOSPICE MAZATLAN- Sierra Rumorosa #33 Fracc. Lomas de Mazatlán, For Info: Lois Croly Cell: 669-5441. www.hospice-mazatlan-aip.org MELAQUE ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS- Wednesday and Sunday 5 pm at San Patricio by The Sea Church. Contact Sharon 315-355-7203.

PUERTO VALLARTA ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS- Meetings Monday to Friday at 8am and 8pm at #1712 Francisco Medina Ascencio in the Hotel Zone.

AL ANON- Monday and Friday 6:30 pm step study Saturday 9am. 222-3906, 222-2521 EXPATS IN VALLARTA- July 9 and 22. Wine appetizer evenings. For locations and time check www.expatsinvallarta.com, NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS- Daily 5pm. 222-3906, 222-2521 CODA STEP SISTERS- Tuesday 6:30pm. 222-3906, 222-2521 NIC ANONYMOUS- Monday 9am. 222-3906, 222-2521 ARTS- a 12 step program for creative people, Tuesday 8pm more info Bill at 222-5711 LIONS CLUB- Wednesdays 9:30 pm, Madero #280, 322-222-0313 OVER EASTER ANONYMOUS- Tuesday 5pm. 222-3906, 222-2521 ROTARY CLUB PITILLAL- Thursdays, 9:00 pm, Outback Restaurant.

OLD TOWN FARMER’S MARKET- Saturdays 10-2, Pulpito 127. www.oldtownfm.com. Re-opening Nov. 5.

NUEVO VALLARTA FRIENDS OF BILL W. Mon. Wed. Fri. 6pm Vallarta time. In Paradise Plaza upper level follow signage to US Consul, to ‘door with notice ‘Friends of Bill W” Contact Adriana (322)297-0064 LO DE MARCOS ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS- 10am at Emiliano Zapata 37, contact Judy Te. (327)275-0328 RINCON DE GUAYABITOS ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS- Monday and Friday 4pm at Peñamar Hotel.

ROTARY CLUB MEETINGS- Wednesday, 7:30 am, Restaurant Piña Colada.

SAN BLAS ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS (English) - Tuesdays 5:00 pm. Saturdays, 10:00 am. Calle Sinaloa #20. Tel: 323-106-1135 SAN PANCHO ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS- Friday 6:30pm. Tel. (311)258-4488 AL ANON- Monday 5pm. Tel. (311)258-4488 CODA- Wednesday 5pm at Museum next to San Pancho Café more info Glenda Tel. (311)258-4488 SAYULITA ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS-Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday 6:30pm. 222-3906, 222-2521 AL ANON- Thursday 5pm 11 Primavera Street. 222-3906, 222-2521 YELAPA Generic 12 Step meetings on Sunday 4pm at Hotel Lagunitas

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El Ojo del Mar / August 2011

The Ojo Crossword

English Church Services – Puerto Vallarta Assembly of God 1 de Junio #333, Col. El Calvario, Pitillal, 322-4163743 Sunday 10:30 AM –English translation Calvary Chapel Pablo Picasso/Diego Rivera #105 (beside La Playa store, just off Ascencio), 322-293-5455 Sunday 10:30 AM - English translation, and 6:30 PM – in English Wednesday 6:30 PM – in English (Bible Study) Centro Cristiano Nuevo Amanecer Sierra Aconagua #111 (next to Bancomer branch on Ascencio), 322-222-3330 Sunday 10:00 AM – English translation Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints Emiliano Zapata #420, 322-209-0592 Sunday 8:00 AM and 12:00 Noon – in Spanish (translators avail.)

Sunday 1:00 PM – in English (Sunday School) Worship in Paradise At Paradise Community Centre Sundays 10:00 am Pulpito 129, old town, www.worshipinparadise.org Christ Church by the Sea Blvd Fco. Medina 7936 (across from Airport) Sunday 10:00 am - In English www,christchurchbythesea.org, 322-209-0895 First Baptist Church Argentina #181 (corner Peru, 1 block north of Malecon), 322-222-1722 Sunday 9:45 AM – in English Iglesia Maria Reina de la Paz Albatros #270, Col. Marina Vallarta,322-209-1545 Sunday 11:00 AM - Bilingual Jehovah’s Witnesses Milan #271, Col. Versalles bthomson@prodigy.net.mx Saturday 4:00 pm and Monday 7:00 PM – in English Parroquia de la Santa Cruz Aguacate #233 (at Lazaro Cardenas), Old Town, 322-222-0989 Sunday 11:00 – part English Parroquia De Nuestra Señora De Guadalupe Miguel Hidalgo #370 (2 blocks E. of City Hall, corner of Independencia, Downtown) 322-222-1326 Saturday 5:00 PM – in English Sunday 10:00 AM – Bilingual

English Church Services – Mazatlan San Judas Tadeo Av. De La Ostra, Col. Sabalo Country Sunday 8:45 AM – in English The Vineyard Church Camaron Sabalo #335, Golden Zona (beside Budget Car Rental) Sunday 9:00 AM – in English

English Church Services – Manzanillo Pedro’s Cazuelas Restaurant Miramar Beach Sunday 5:00 PM – in English

English Church Services – Melaque St. Patricio By-The-Sea Sunday 10:30 AM, www.sanpatricio-by-the-sea.com