Joseph Hong, Advice

Advice

Joseph Hong

Never say “I love you” on a first date, unless you really mean it. Actually, no, just don’t say a word, even when things seem green-lit.

When the night intoxicates your mind and love is on your lips, dunk your head in a bowl of ice and for goodness’ sake avoid those tempting quips.

You know—the ones about how you and she have to be a perfect match, the ones that sink into all cliches, as onto her pretty eyes you latch.

Stop watching those swaying hips of hers and think about the future, will she really be there to the end or be just another wound to suture?

Love isn’t the same as “like” or “desire”— it doesn’t end at feeling, love goes deeper than that, down to the soul, it’s about finding mutual healing.

Of the mind, the body, the spirit within all of these things you’ll see, once you’ve been together, torn apart, approached asymptotic, maybe.

It’s one of those things you learn with time and many a broken heart, so though “the one” she may not be to finding her she’ll be a part.

But of course at your age, of all these word only three of them come through: the moment you pull her aside and smile, uttering, “I love you.”