49 TC Student Guide Version A Spring 2016

EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Student Guide EL Civics # 49 - A

Transition to College Teacher’s Name: _______________ Student’s Name: ______________ Spring 2016

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

California

To the Student: You are going to study some lessons that will help you transition to college or career training. In particular, you will 

learn about California higher education systems,

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research information about specific educational programs, and

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learn how to write an effective personal statement typically required in an application for scholarship or acceptance to an academic program.

After you study the lessons, you will take a test to demonstrate that you can do the following: 1. Write a four to five-paragraph personal statement essay about your personal qualifications, educational background, and academic and career goals.

2. Present oral responses to five questions about the higher educational systems in California, compare California educational systems in your native country, and identify a school system in California that provides a pathway for your career goal.

These lessons are part of the EL Civics grant, a federally funded program that helps newcomers live successful lives in the United States, fulfilling their roles as family members, workers, and participants in their new communities.

Use your smartphone to scan the QR code above for video demo of assessment

© Continuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Program 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Education Pays!

Your efforts to get more education will probably pay off in the future. Statistics show that a person’s job earnings and chances of being employed in the future are proportional to his/her education. In other words, the higher the level of education a person achieves, the greater the opportunity for a job and a better salary.

1. Study the chart below. Does the data in the chart support the information in the paragraph above? How? Explain to your class.

2. Answer the questions with a classmate.

1. What is the average monthly salary for someone who has not graduated from high school?

What are his or her chances of being unemployed?

2. How much more does a person with a master’s degree earn compared with a person who only has a high school diploma? How does the unemployment rate change?

3. How does a high school graduate’s monthly salary change on average after he or she completes an associate degree? What about the unemployment rate?

4. Can you make more money with a higher level of education in your country?

Definitions

Associate degree – documents two years of study at a community college

of degrees

Bachelor’s degree – documents four years of study at a college or university Master’s degree – requires one to two years after completing the bachelor’s degree Doctoral degree/doctorate (Ph.D.) – documents three to five years after a master’s degree; emphasizes theory and research Professional degree – awarded in professions such as architecture, medicine, engineering, or law, which usually require a license

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

SDCCD Pathways to Higher Education The San Diego Community College District, the second-largest community college district in California, offers a wide selection of educational programs. The District includes three two-year colleges: City College, Mesa College, and Miramar College, as well as Continuing Education. At the three sister colleges, students can enroll in credit courses and earn college credit, which counts towards an associate degree and certificates. Some of these credits can be transferred to universities and count towards a degree awarded by that institution. Many students who are planning to obtain a bachelor’s degree earn their first two years of credits in the District before they move to a four-year college. Continuing Education offers non-credit classes for students who want to improve their skills or obtain a certificate in a variety of vocations. It also offers the GED/High School Diploma program for adults who wish to complete a high school diploma.

1. Study the chart below. How can students transition out of the non-credit division (Continuing Education) into the college credit system?

San Diego Community College District (SDCCD) Non-credit San Diego Continuing Education

2-year credit colleges City College ∙ Mesa College ∙ Miramar College

GED/High School Diploma

Transition to College ESL classes

Credit classes Non-transferrable ESL classes

Transferrable classes Non-transferrable certificate classes

Local 4-year colleges and beyond

University of California at San Diego

(UCSD)

San Diego State University

(SDSU)

Job training/Certificate Programs

2. Answer the questions. a. What pathways are available to students who complete a Transition to College class? b. Do all classes at City College, Mesa College and Miramar College count toward a degree?

Circle the evidence. c. Which educational systems provide certificate programs?

Discuss the questions with your classmates.

1. What previous education do you have?

2. What are your career goals? What education do you need to reach your goals?

3. Which pathway from SDCCD to further education would be good for you? © Continuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Program 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Learn About Public Higher Education in California California Public Higher Education System

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From the early beginnings, Americans have believed that their country was a land of opportunity, where hard work and ability would be rewarded. Consequently, a system of education was needed which would reflect those ideals and provide a pathway for everyone who had a strong desire to succeed and was willing to work hard. In 1960, California took the lead in this project and united its existing colleges and universities under a single plan, called the California Master Plan for Higher Education. A three-tier system was created consisting of the University of California schools, California State Universities, and California Community Colleges. Each type of school had its own responsibilities and served different needs, but students could still advance within the larger system. The creators of the Plan also did what no other state had done before: they promised a place for everyone who could benefit from higher education. The result is our current comprehensive system of public higher education combining exceptional quality and broad access.

The University of California (UC) is the state’s primary academic research institution and provides undergraduate and graduate education, including doctoral degrees. It is also the only one among the three types of schools that provides professional degree programs in law and medicine. The first of its 10 campuses, UC Berkley, was founded in 1868, and is ranked in the very top worldwide among public and private universities. UC has the most selective admission requirements and admits students from the top 12.5 percent of high school graduates. Professors are selected for their academic research and often have graduate assistants to help them with undergraduate teaching and research.

The California State Universities (CSU) focus on undergraduate and graduate education. The schools prepare the majority of students to enter the job market after the completion of a bachelor’s degree program, but they also offer graduate and professional programs and some doctoral programs jointly with other institutions. The first CSU schools were created from teaching colleges and to this day CSU educates the majority of the state’s teachers, as well as most of its administrators. CSU selects students from the top third of high school graduates. With 23 campuses enrolling over 400,000 students, it is the largest university system in the United States.

The California Community Colleges (CCC) comprise the largest system of higher education in the world with over 2 million students attending 112 campuses. This system differs from traditional colleges by providing two-year undergraduate education with an associate degree, as well as short-term and long-term vocational certificate programs and non-credit continuing education for adults. Its most important feature, however, is its openness: CCC admits anyone who can benefit from instruction. This, in combination with university transfer and low fees, makes CCC a gateway to higher education for everyone. It guarantees that even an underprepared student who failed the admission requirements to UC or CSU may still be admitted upon successful completion of a transfer program at CCC. Designed in this way, the system offers multiple pathways to personal growth and economic advancement to over three million students at all socioeconomic levels, over half of whom identify themselves as members of a racial or ethnic minority. True to its promise to provide education to anyone who wants to work hard to succeed, it allows individuals to train for their future careers, and prepares them for life in a complex democratic society.

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

1. Find the answers to the following questions in the essay. Write the number of the line where the answer is found next to the question. Discuss your answers with a classmate.

1. What unique promise did California make to its residents in 1960? ______ 2. What are the three tiers of schools created under the California Master Plan for Higher Education? ______ 3. How are California community colleges different from traditional colleges? ______ 4. What percentage of high school students are accepted into the UC system? ______ 5. What percentage of high school students are accepted into CSU? ______

2. Discuss the questions in small group.

1. Do you know of a UC or CSU school in San Diego? If so, what is it called?

2. Do you know anyone attending one of the schools described in the text? If so, describe his/her experiences at school (e.g., How did he/she get in? What is he/she studying?).

3. The essay states that “Americans have believed that their country was a land of opportunity, where hard work and ability would be rewarded.” Do you think the creators of the California Master Plan for Higher Education achieved a system that supports this belief? Why or why not?

4. Tell about the system of higher education in your country. How is it similar to or different from the California system?

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Comparison of Community Colleges, California State Universities, and University of California Schools Read the chart below to study the similarities and differences among the three higher education school systems in California.

California Community Colleges (CCC)

California State University (CSU)

University of California (UC)

Mission & Philosophy CCC admits any student capable of benefiting from instruction. Its primary focus is academic and vocational instruction for students through the first two years of undergraduate education.

CSU admits students from the top one-third of high school graduates. Its primary focus is undergraduate and graduate education through the master’s degree.

UC admits students from the top one-eighth of high school graduates. It focuses on academic research and undergraduate, graduate, and professional education through the doctoral degree.

Program of Study CCC offers academic preparation including university transfer, vocational training, remedial instruction, ESL and personal enhancement classes. Students can attend part-time, full-time, or enroll in an individual course.

CSU offers general academic education courses and prepares the majority of students to enter the job market. Students can attend part-time or full-time and lots of evening classes are available.

UC offers general academic education and prepares students to advance to graduate programs.

Only UC offers professional education in law and medicine.

Students are expected to attend full-time.

Degrees Students can get a certificate or/and an associate degree.

Students can get a bachelor’s or master’s degree. A few doctoral programs are offered jointly with other institutions.

Students can get a bachelor’s, master’s, or doctoral degree.

Campuses & Students There are 112 CCC campuses serving over 2 million students.

There are 23 CSU campuses serving over 400 thousand students.

There are 10 UC campuses serving over 200 thousand students.

Contact with Professor Most students find it easy to have contact with their professors in class and during office hours.

Most students have their professors in class and can make an appointment during office hours.

Many students find it difficult to have direct contact with their professors because they do academic research.

Undergraduate courses are often taught by graduate assistants, and contact may be limited to the graduate assistants rather than a professor.

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Students are called freshmen in their 1st year and sophomores in their 2nd year. They are all undergraduate students.

As of spring 2016, residents pay $46 per unit. Nonresidents pay $190 per unit. Non-credit classes cost a fee or are free.

Many forms of financial aid are available: grants (which don’t have to be repaid), loans (which must be repaid with interest), scholarships (gifts based on merit), work study, veteran benefits, and child-care subsidy.

Student Titles Students are called freshmen in their 1st year, sophomores in their 2nd year, juniors in their 3rd year, and seniors in their 4th year. Until they get a bachelor’s degree, they are undergraduate students.

If they continue towards the master’s or doctoral degree, they become graduate students.

Cost of Classes As of spring 2016, undergraduate students pay $5,472 per year.

Graduate students pay $6,738 per year. Nonresident students pay an additional $372 for every unit.

Financial Aid In addition to the basic forms of financial aid for all students, graduate students in some departments can apply for a graduate or teaching assistantship and obtain a tuition waiver and a stipend.

Medical Services Most CCs have a registered There are doctors and nurses on nurse and general health services campus at the Health Services for college credit students.

Office. Most medical services can be provided on campus.

Students are called freshmen in their 1st year, sophomores in their 2nd year juniors in their 3rd year and seniors in their 4th year. Until they get a bachelor’s degree, they are undergraduate students.

If they continue towards the master’s or doctoral degree, they become graduate students.

As of spring 2016, all students pay $12,804 of basic tuition per year. Graduate professional degree students pay an additional annual tuition between $5,000 and $35,000 depending on the program. In addition, nonresident students are charged $24,024 per year.

In addition to the basic forms of financial aid for all students, graduate students in some departments can apply for a graduate or teaching assistantship and obtain a tuition waiver and a stipend.

There are doctors and nurses on campus at the Health Services Office. Most medical services can be provided on campus.

There is usually no on-campus or off-campus housing for students.

Housing There is some on-campus and off-campus housing provided by CSU.

There is some on-campus and off-campus housing provided by UC.

Many student services offices are on campus, e.g., Counseling Office, Disabled Students Office, Veterans Office, Health Services Center, or Tutoring Center.

Services on Campus Many student services offices are on campus, e.g., Counseling Office, Disabled Students Office, Tutoring Center, Career Services, International Student Center, or Job Placement Office.

Many student services offices are on campus, e.g., Counseling Office, Disabled Students Office, Tutoring Center, Career Services, International Student Center, or Job Placement Office.

Parking Students pay for parking on campus. For example, at SDSU the student permit costs $162 per semester.

Students pay for parking on campus. For example, at UCSD the student permit costs $732 per year.

Students pay for parking on campus. For example, at SDCCD the student permit costs $35 per semester.

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Reading Comprehension Questions Reread the information in the chart on pages 6-7 to find the answers to the following questions. Discuss your answers with a classmate.

1. Which school system serves the largest number of students?

2. Which school system does the most academic research?

3. Which school system(s) expect(s) students to attend full-time?

4. At which school system(s) can students obtain an associate degree?

5. Which school system(s) offer(s) professional degrees in law and medicine?

6. In which school system is it the easiest to contact the professor?

7. Assuming one has a full-time course load of 12 units per semester, which school is the most expensive?

8. At which school system(s) is it possible to obtain financial aid?

9. Are general health services available to all CCC students?

10. Do all school systems offer on-campus housing for students?

Practicing College-Related Vocabulary Directions: Complete the paragraphs below with the words in the boxes. Change the grammatical form of the word if necessary. Note that offer and provide, as well as admit and enroll*, can sometimes be used interchangeably.

1. The schools in the California public higher education system provide many opportunities for continued study. Altogether, they admit 3 million students who study part-time or full-time. Students can __________________ an individual class or __________________ in a degree program.

admit attend enroll provide

2. Depending on their year of study, undergraduate students are called by different names. A first-year student is a __________________. A second-year student is a __________________. In their third year, students are called ________________, and in their fourth year, they become __________________.

freshman junior senior sophomore

3. Several forms of financial aid are available to college students. A _____________ is a gift which does not have to be repaid. An award based on merit, that is, on previous achievement, is called a ______________. The _______________ program provides part-time employment to students on campus and off-campus. Finally, students can take out a __________________, which they will later have to repay with interest.

grant loan scholarship work study

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Preparing for the Oral Assessment You are going to participate in an interview about the system of higher education in California.

There are three parts to the interview: Part 1: Answer five questions about higher educational systems in California.

Part 2: Identify your native country. Then compare the higher education system in \ in your native country.

California with educational systems Part 3: Explain your career or educational goal and identify which school system in California is the best pathway to your career goal.

Practice for the Oral Assessment, Part 1: Questions about the California System of Higher Education 1. Work with a partner to complete the answers to the questions below. The phrases provided are suggestions for starting a response, but you may respond in other ways as well. If necessary, go to the chart on pages 6-7 to find the information needed to respond.

2. Have your classmate close his or her booklet. Ask your classmate the questions*.

Listen to your classmate’s answers and check for accuracy. Then, change roles.

1. What are the three higher education school systems in California?

The three school systems are _______________ _______________________________________.

2. Which school system is the largest?

The ________________________ is the largest.

3. What degree is offered at community colleges?

Students may earn a(n) ___________________ .

4. What are the titles for students each year at fouryear schools?

A first-year student is called a ______________ A second-year student is called a ________, etc.

5. What is the difference between a student loan and a grant?

A student loan _________________________.

However, a grant is a ____________________.

6. What degrees are offered at the University of California?

Students can earn a _______________________ or a ______________ or a ________________.

7. Which of the school systems is the most difficult to enter and which is the easiest?

The __________ is the most difficult to enter whereas the ________________ is the easiest.

8. Compare the cost of tuition at the various school systems. Which is the most affordable? Which is most expensive?

Tuition at ____________ is most affordable, and tuition at ________________ is most expensive.

9. Compare the cost of parking at the various school systems. Which is the cheapest? Which is the most expensive?

Parking at ___________ is the cheapest, and parking at ______________ is the most expensive.

10. Which of the school systems offer financial aid?

Financial aid is available at ________________.

11. Which school systems offer on–campus housing?

The _______________ school systems offer oncampus housing.

*For the assessment, the examiner will ask five of these questions at random. © Continuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Program 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Practice for the Oral Assessment, Part 2: Compare and Contrast Education in Your Country and in the U.S. 1. How is the system of higher education in your country similar to and/or different from the California systems? Discuss the questions below with your classmates.

1. Does your country have a public system of higher education, that is, a system mainly provided by the government which benefits the whole society, rather than selected groups?

2. Is higher education available to many people in your country? What typically prevents people from going to college in your country?

3. What are the rewards of completing higher education in your country?

2. Complete the table below with notes. Write key words only to compare specific aspects of the California higher education system to the higher education system in your country*.

California 1.

Cost/Financial aid

2.

Admission requirements

3.

Degrees

4.

Contact with professors

5.

Housing

6.

_____________

Your Country: _______________________

*You can use the internet to do research or interview a classmate if you are not certain about the higher educational system in your country. Š Continuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Program 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Practicing the Grammar of Similarity and Contrast There are several grammatical devices that help make comparisons in English. To express direct contrast, you can use prepositions, such as unlike, conjunctions, such as while or whereas, or transitions, such as however, on the other hand, or in contrast. To express similarity, you can use prepositions such as like, conjunctions, such as both … and … or as well as, or transition phrases, such as similarly, likewise, or in a similar way.

Remember: Prepositions come before nouns; conjunctions join two words, two phrases, or two clauses; and transitions provide a smooth transition between two sentences.

1. Study the statements below. Write S next to the statement if the compared segments are similar.

Write D if they are different.

1. UC and CSU schools select students for admission. Community colleges, on the other hand, keep their doors open to everyone.

2. Like UC or CSU students who begin their undergraduate study, first-year students at community colleges are called freshmen.

3. Undergraduate students at UC, as well as graduate students, pay the basic annual tuition of $12,804.

4. CSU and UC schools offer undergraduate and graduate programs, while community colleges provide only undergraduate instruction.

5. At the community colleges, resident students pay as little as $46 per unit, whereas annual tuition for a professional degree program at a UC school may cost $40, 000 or more.

6. CSU schools provide financial aid to students who need it. Likewise, many forms of financial aid are available at community colleges.

2. Now write statements comparing the California system of higher education and the system in your country. Use the words and phrases in the boxes to express similarity and contrast.

Example: Parking can be very expensive for college students in California, whereas in my country most students use public transportation.

Similarity:

1. __________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________ 2. __________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________ 3. __________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________ © Continuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Program 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

…, as well as …, both … and … in a similar way like likewise similarly

Contrast:

however in contrast on the other hand unlike whereas while 11

EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Preparing for the Oral Assessment, Part 2: Model Response 1. Read the assessment question and the sample response below.

Examiner:

Student: You have answered my questions about the California system of public education.

Now, can you tell me about the system of higher education in your country? How is it similar to and/or different from the California system?

I am from Mexico. In Mexico, we have both public and private universities. The public schools are better. Unlike the CSU and UC systems, Mexican public universities are free or only charge a small tuition, and there are usually no dorms on campus. However, they are similar to the UC system because they are very difficult to get into.

And, like at the UC schools, it is not possible to study part-time.

2. Write a script of your response to the examiner’s question above. Begin by stating your country. Give at least three examples of similarities and/or differences. Use the conjunctions and transition phrases you practiced on p. 11. _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________

3. Write the key words on an index card to use during assessment.

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Practice for the Oral Assessment, Part 3: The Best Pathway for You 1. Read the examiner’s question. Then write notes about yourself in the table below.

“Of the three higher educational systems in California: community colleges, California State Universities, and University of California schools, which would be the best pathway to your career goal? Why?” My Career Goal

Best Pathway

Reason

2. Ask a classmate the examiner’s questions. Take notes during his/her response.

Career Goal

Best Pathway

Reason

3. Summarize your classmate’s responses to the class. © Continuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Program 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Preparing for the Oral Assessment, Part 3: Model Response 1. Read the assessment question and the sample response below.

Examiner:

Student: Of the three public higher educational systems in California, which would be the best pathway to your career goal, and why?

The California State University system is the best pathway for me because I want to be a high school Spanish teacher in California. In order to become a high school teacher here, I need a bachelor’s degree and teaching credentials.

SDSU offers bachelor’s degrees and a teacher credential program. Although the tuition is expensive, a counselor showed me that I qualify for financial aid, and I can work part-time while I study. The problem is that even though I completed my studies in Mexico, I never got a diploma, so I cannot get full credit for my bachelor’s degree. I need to contact my university in Mexico and complete my thesis. Then, I can complete the teacher credential program. So SDSU offers a way for me to reach my career goal.

2. Write a script of your response to the examiner’s question above. _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________

3. Write the key words on an index card to use during assessment.

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Tips for Performing Your Best at an Oral Interview A. Read the tips below. What else do you think is necessary to be successful in an oral interview?

1. Practice, practice, practice. Nothing will help you speak more clearly than practice, and nothing will give you more confidence than being prepared.

2. Manage your stress. Being interviewed face-to-face by a stranger who is evaluating you can make anyone stressed. In small doses, however, stress can be a beneficial motivator.

On assessment day, take a deep breath before you enter, remind yourself that the interviewer wants you to succeed, and, above all, remember that you are prepared.

3. Smile as you enter the room and address the interviewer with a clear, enthusiastic Hello or Good morning/evening.

4. Look the interviewer in the eye when you greet her or him and maintain eye contact most of the time. It’s OK to glance at your cards, but do not read them.

5. Do not sit down until asked.

6. During the interview, keep straight posture. Avoid fidgeting because such gestures will make you appear nervous and lacking confidence.

7. At the end of the assessment, say Good-bye, and thank the interviewer for talking with you.

B. Discuss the tips with a classmate.

1. Which tips will be easy for you to follow? Which will be difficult?

C. Extra! Use your smart phone to access this QR Code. You will see a demonstration of an assessment interview.

Use your smartphone to scan the QR code above for video demo of assessment

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Final Practice for Oral Assessment 1. Get together in a group of three students. Choose a role: A. Examiner

B. Student

C. Evaluator

2. Read the instructions for your role. Then practice.

A. You will be the Examiner. Follow the script below.

B. You will practice your own answers for the oral assessment. Give your booklet to the Evaluator so that he/she can fill out your checklist on the following page. Wait to be invited to sit down. Listen and respond to the Examiner’s prompts.

C. Watch and listen to your classmate (B) practice. Fill out the checklist on the following page in student B’s book.

3. After the first practice, change roles and repeat two more times.

A: Hello. Please come in.

B: ______________________________________________ A: Nice to meet you, too. Please sit down. I’m going to ask you five questions about the higher education system in California. Are you ready to begin?

B: _____________________ A: (Ask any five of the questions on page 9, one at a time.)

B: ______________________________________________________ (5 separate answers) A: Ok. Now please tell me, how is the system of higher education in your country similar to and/or different from the California systems? (See page 12) B: ________________________________________________________________________ A: All right. Of the three higher educational systems in California: community colleges, California State Universities, and University of California schools, which would be the best pathway to your career goal? Why? (See page 14) B: ________________________________________________________________________ A: Thank you. You have finished the assessment.

B: ________________________________________________________________________ A: You’re welcome.

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A

Oral Assessment Checklist To Student C: Watch and listen to your classmate (B) practice. Check the items your classmate does well.

Well Done Content 1. Was the presentation well organized?

2. Did he/she provide enough detail?

3. Did he/she answer the examiner’s questions?

Presentation 1. Did he/she smile when greeting the interviewer and during the interview?

2. Did he/she speak clearly and audibly?

3. Did he/she speak at the proper pace, not too fast and not too slow?

Did he/she make a lot of pauses?

4. Did he/she maintain eye contact with the interviewer most of the time?

5. Did he/she use note cards effectively without reading them?

6. Did he/she maintain good posture?

7. Did he/she appear confident?

Š Continuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Program 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A Page 1 of 2

Model Essay #1: Sonya’s Personal Statement Applying to a Nursing Program People applying to professional degree programs, as well as those applying for scholarships, are typically asked to write an essay about their personal qualities, educational background, professional experiences and accomplishments, and future goals. This is called a personal statement essay. Below is a model essay of a nurse applying to a program in nursing.

1. Read the essay prompt and the essay. Then complete the paragraph summaries in the boxes on the right by writing the main idea for each body paragraph.

Essay Prompt: “Write a four or five-paragraph personal statement essay. Tell us why you want to pursue further education, and how your life experiences, personal qualifications, and educational background are compatible with the program to which you are applying.”

When I was diagnosed with juvenile diabetes at age eight in Mexico, I realized my life would never be the same. My diet and lifestyle were only some

Paragraph Summary:

of the things I had to change. The diagnosis also altered my view on life, which

Introduction:

led me to want to be a nurse and care for others. Through volunteer work, I 5

recognized the truly personal impact I could have helping those who suffer as I

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have. My childhood experiences, strong desire to help people, and education have convinced me that nursing is the right path for me. Now I must expand my knowledge through more education.

While I had to watch my blood sugar, my friends were eating chocolate 10

bars and drinking soda. I felt so left out. I wanted to celebrate birthdays like all

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the other kids my age did. I had to give myself four shots a day and deal with

Body Paragraph 1:

the highs and lows of blood sugar. Those fluctuations sometimes landed me in the hospital. But those visits in the hospital changed me, too. During those repeated hospital stays, the nurses were angels to me, giving me love, courage 15

and hope. It was then that I decided that I wanted to be like them. I wanted to

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be a nurse, so I could help children deal with their illnesses in the same way I was helped. I thought that playing a crucial role in saving or improving someone’s life would be very gratifying.

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Being a nurse means every day will be different, and I possess the right 20

personality traits to deal with day-to-day challenges: leadership, flexibility, and

20

compassion. When I see a problem, I seek a solution quickly and do not wait for

Body Paragraph 2:

others to get the ball rolling. Being the oldest of seven children, I’ve made many decisions for my brothers and sisters. People can depend on me to finish projects I start and to always do my best. When my grandmother was sick 25

after her heart attack, I helped her until she got better. After caring for myself,

20

my siblings, and my grandmother, I recognize the importance of consistently responding to unexpected demands with patience and compassion. Life has nurtured in me a deep sense of responsibility and great compassion.

I am preparing to extend my education by studying nursing at City College 30

and then transferring to San Diego State University. There I will get a Bachelor

20

of Science in Nursing degree to become the first-class nurse that I want to be.

Body Paragraph 3:

After taking several ESL classes, I am now completing the Transition to College class in the San Diego Community College District. I hope to get a scholarship to help me pay for my schooling. I have been volunteering at Rady Children’s 35

Hospital in San Diego. This position gave me a chance to see the functioning of

20

American hospital healthcare. I was able to interact with the patients, as well as watch the nurses as they performed their daily duties, and see how healthcare in the U.S. differs from medical care in Mexico.

I've always admired nurses and doctors. I know that this is a profession 40

Conclusion:

that would empower me to develop my leadership skills and provide the

20

utmost quality of care to my future patients. My dependability and passion for caring will help me reach my goal to be a registered nurse.

2. Write short answers to the questions.

1. What event in Sonya’s childhood prompted her interest in helping sick people?

2. How did Sonya’s hospital visits influence her career choice?

3. What qualities does Sonya have that would help her be a good nurse?

4. What program does she want to enter?

5. How has Sonya prepared for the program?

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Analyzing Essay Structure Both Sonya's personal statement (pages 20-21) and the text about the California public higher education system on page 4 are examples of essays and have the same basic structure.

1. Read about essay structure.

An essay has three main parts: an introduction, a body (which consists of a number of supporting paragraphs), and a conclusion. Each part has its purpose: 

The introduction “hooks” the reader’s attention, provides basic information on the subject, and states the main idea in a thesis statement.



The supporting paragraphs explain and support the main idea. Each major supporting idea is developed in a separate body paragraph. Each body paragraph thus has its own main idea, which is presented in a topic sentence and supported with details and examples in the body of the paragraph.



The conclusion restates the thesis, summarizes the main points of the essay, and makes final comments.

In its structure, an essay is thus similar to a paragraph: .

Parts of a Paragraph

Parts of an Essay

Topic sentence

Introduction with thesis

Supporting sentences

Supporting paragraphs

Concluding sentence

Conclusion

2. Look at Sonya’s essay again. Answer the questions below: 1. Can you identify the thesis in the introduction paragraph?

2. How is the thesis restated in the conclusion?

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Writing an Essay Outline Before the writer writes the first draft of the essay, he or she writes an outline. An outline is a plan for the essay. It states the thesis and the main supporting ideas and it supplies the organization and structure.

Later the writer creates complete sentences to express ideas in the outline and adds details to make an essay.

Sonya wrote the outline below before writing her essay. Compare the outline below to her essay on pages 20-21. Find each part of the essay that matches the notes in the outline and write the corresponding line number(s) on the blank lines in the outline. Then finish the outline by filling out body paragraph 3 and the conclusion.

Nursing Personal Statement I. Introduction ______ Thesis: Childhood experiences, desire to help people and previous education have led me to want to become a nurse _____ II. Body paragraph 1 ______ Supporting Idea: Living with the disease, hospital visits motivated me to become a nurse ______ Supporting details: a. Diagnosis altered lifestyle ______ b. Volunteer work brought out caring ______ c. Hospital visits sparked career interest ______ III. Body paragraph 2 _____ Supporting idea: My personal qualities match the nursing profession ______ Supporting details: a. Leadership ______ b. Flexibility ______ c. Compassion ______ IV. Body paragraph 3 ______ Supporting idea: ________________________________________ ______ Supporting details: a. ________________________________ ______ b. ________________________________ ______ c. ________________________________ ______ V. Conclusion ______ Thesis recap and concluding statement: _________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _ _______ Š Continuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Program 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

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Essay Analysis Analyzing Essay Content: The Narrative A personal statement includes the applicant’s personal story. It is important to not only pick the right biographical events which will illustrate the candidate’s strengths and qualifications, but also organize them in a logical manner, which will make the story easier to follow and the statement more effective. Sometimes the best order is the chronological order.

Use the events in the box below to complete Sonya’s narrative. Make sure the events are organized in chronological order*. Pay attention to the words and phrases that combine the events in the text. Remember to capitalize the first word in each sentence.

I was eight decided that I wanted to be like them have taken several ESL classes

those repeated hospital stays grandmother had a heart attack friends could eat chocolate bars and drink soda

When_________________, I was diagnosed with juvenile diabetes. The diagnosis completely changed my diet, lifestyle, and view on life. While my __________________________________, I had to watch my blood sugar. In spite of my efforts, blood sugar fluctuations sometimes landed me in the hospital. During ____________________________, I received a lot of love, courage, and hope from the nurses who were taking care of me. It was then that I _________________ __________________________. Later, after my _____________________________, I helped her until she got better. After caring for myself and for my grandmother, I developed a strong sense of responsibility and compassion. Now that I ______________________________, I am ready apply to a nursing program.

*See Sonya’s personal statement on pages 20-21. © Continuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Program 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

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Analyzing Essay Content: Personal Qualities The purpose of the personal statement is to convince the institution to which you are applying that your qualities and qualifications are superb and make you a perfect fit for them. Writing about oneself in such terms requires self-reflection, the ability to identify one’s strengths, and willingness to speak about them openly. Each of these can be a challenge.

1. In her essay, Sonya demonstrates many positive personal qualities. What qualities does she state that she has? What other qualities can the reader infer? Writer the line number next to the quality. _23_ leadership

____ caring

____ flexible

____ empathetic*

____ hard-working

____ dependable

____ persistent

* Empathetic means compassionate and understanding

2. Read the list of personal strengths below. On the blank lines at the bottom, write down words that you do not know. Look them up and note definitions. ____ accurate

____ enthusiastic

____ professional

____ ambitious

____ flexible

____ a quick learner

____ assertive

____ hardworking

____ resourceful

____ cheerful

____ knowledgeable

____ responsible

____ conscientious

____ motivated

____ results-oriented

____ cooperative

____ open-minded

____ a team player

____ dependable

____ organized

____ a trouble-shooter

____ detail-oriented

____ outgoing

____ thorough

____ diplomatic

____ polite

____ trustworthy

____ energetic

____ productive

____ willing to take risks

New Words: _______________ means _________________________________________________________ _______________ means _________________________________________________________ _______________ means _________________________________________________________ 3. Talk in a small group. Explain two qualities from the list that you possess. Describe situations in which you have demonstrated those qualities. Are those qualities related in any way to your career goal?

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Model Essay #2: Amir’s Personal Statement A Transfer Student Applying to a B.S. Program at a UC School UC colleges typically ask undergraduate applicants to write an essay about their personal qualities, educational and professional background, and accomplishments. Below is a model essay of a transfer student applying to a bachelor’s program at a UC school.

Read the essay prompt and Amir’s essay.

Essay Prompt: "Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?"

Paragraph Summary:

Two qualities are responsible for who I am and where I am heading in life: an interest in how things work and perseverance in looking for answers. At this point, I have well defined career goals, and I am on a clear pathway to achieve them: I am completing a transfer program at the 5

Community College and applying to a bachelor’s program in chemistry in order to become a pharmacist in seven years. But my journey started many

Introduction: Two qualities, an interest in how things work and perseverance, have led me through life and in my journey to become a pharmacist.

years ago and has not always been so straightforward.

When I was in 10th grade, my father developed a serious breathing difficulty and began to lose weight. The doctor found a swelling in the lymph 10

glands and suspected cancer. My mother was devastated, but wanted a second opinion and we had soon visited many doctors in Syria who could not agree on a diagnosis. Eventually, he was diagnosed with sarcoidosis, a

Body Paragraph 1: The experience of my father’s disease affected the family.

recently discovered and poorly understood disease of the immune system, but since no effective drugs have been developed, he was treated with 15

steroids, which caused him major headaches and sleep problems.

The realization that there are diseases so mysterious and poorly understood prompted me to study pharmacy. I wanted to learn how drugs are made and how they interact with the body. Curiosity and the desire to make a difference through medicine made me a determined student, so

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when I saw the score on my high school certificate exam, I was ecstatic because it meant I would be able to apply to any school. I enrolled in a 5year program in pharmacy at the University of Ebla. Ebla is a modern

Body Paragraph 2: My father’s incurable disease prompted my interest in human health, and I decided to study pharmacy.

university and is considered one of the best private universities in Syria.

Only the top scoring students are admitted and the first year proved to be 25

very challenging. Yet, I persisted. The organic chemistry class and the botany lab were my consolation in the merciless rigor of the program. I

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A Page 2 of 2 was thrilled because I was learning to mix chemicals and looking at the hidden structure of plant cells through the microscope. These two classes explained so many mysteries that had puzzled me since childhood. I not 30 20

only survived, but by the end of the first year I was among the top scoring students again.

Yet my joy was not to last. While I was travelling to visit my family in the U.S. after the second year, the war in Syria broke out. My hopes were devastated within days. The borders were closed, and I was unable to go

35

back. Schools closed down, houses were demolished, and people were

Body Paragraph 3:

20

dying. I felt dejected and defeated. However, I resolved to persevere and began to look for ways to continue my education in the U.S. I was clearly in unknown waters having to face the challenge of a new language and an incomprehensible education system. Within a few months, I 40

enrolled in a Transition to College ESL class at San Diego Continuing

20

Education. Slowly, I figured out what I needed to do to study pharmacy.

After two years, I was able to enroll in the Chemistry program at Mesa College, where I am now working towards the associate degree and preparing for transfer to the bachelor’s program in Pharmaceutical 45 20

Chemistry at UCSD. While my friends in Syria are struggling to survive, my academic success in America is bittersweet at best. Yet I am proud that I am getting closer to the goals I set out to accomplish. And if in those years I had to take a detour, it was only for the better because in addition to finding

50 20

answers to many medical questions, I have also learned how to face life’s

Conclusion: Thanks to these qualities, I am now closer to my academic goals and have acquired important life skills along the way.

adversities, appreciate its opportunities, and, against all odds, stay on course.

Your turn The major ideas of the first two body paragraphs have been summarized in the boxes to the right of the text. Add a summary of the major idea of body paragraph 3. Discuss your summary with a classmate.

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Reading Comprehension Questions Directions: Read the essay and find the answers to the following questions. Discuss your answers with a classmate.

1. What country is Amir from?

2. What profession is he pursuing?

3. What event prompted his interest in this profession?

4. What requirements did he have to fulfill to be admitted to a pharmacy program in Syria?

5. Why were organic chemistry and botany his favorite courses?

6. What obstacles caused a detour in his studies?

7. Where was he when the war in Syria broke out?

8. At the community college, what is he studying now?

9. What degree is he going to obtain next year?

10. What does he need to do next in order to become a pharmacist?

11. How many more years is it going to take him to become a pharmacist?

12. Does he feel overwhelmed by the amount of work ahead of him or optimistic that he can succeed?

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Preparing for the Writing Assessment: Your Professional Qualifications and Commitment In order to write a convincing personal statement, you need to show that your professional interests are rooted in the circumstances of your life and that you are committed to pursuing them. That means that you need to explain how people and events in your life have led to your career choices and show a record of experiences and accomplishments proving your qualifications and commitment to your career path and the program to which you are applying.

In her essay, Sonya demonstrates her qualifications and commitment to nursing in many ways. She relates her career choice to her childhood experience and explains how her illness sparked her passion for the profession. She describes the education she has completed at San Diego Continuing Education and the volunteer experience she has had in the U.S. 1. Reflect upon your future career by writing answers to the questions below.

1. What career have you decided to pursue? What program will you, or would you, apply to? ______________________________________________________________________________ 2. What circumstance influenced your career choice? For example, was your career choice influenced by your family or other significant people? Was there an event in your life that served as a turning point in your choice of career? ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ 3. What education have you completed to prepare for your career? _______________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________ 4. What work-related experience, including volunteer experience, do you have? ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ 5. What obstacles have you experienced while pursuing your career? ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ 6. How is your background compatible with the program to which you are applying? ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

2. Interview two classmates. Ask and answer the questions in exercise 1. Š Continuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Program 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

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Preparing for the Writing Assessment: Writing an Essay Outline Now make a plan for your essay by completing the outline below. You do not need to write complete sentences, only key ideas or phrases.

Prompt:

Tell us why you want to pursue further education, and how your life experiences, personal qualifications, and educational background are compatible with the program to which you are applying.

Personal Statement I. Introduction Thesis: ___________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________________ II. Body paragraph 1 Supporting Idea: ___________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________________ Supporting details: a. ___________________________________________ b. ___________________________________________ c. ___________________________________________ III. Body paragraph 2 Supporting idea: ___________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________________ Supporting details: a. ___________________________________________ b. ___________________________________________ c. ___________________________________________ IV. Body paragraph 3 Supporting idea: ___________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________________ Supporting details: a. ___________________________________________ b. ___________________________________________ c. ___________________________________________ V. Conclusion _________________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________________

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Tips for Writing a Personal Statement Before writing your own personal statement, study these tips.

1. Your personal statement should be, above all, personal. It should be an authentic and honest presentation of the person you are. The admissions committee should have a sense that they can see the person behind the writing.

2. Do research on the program to which you are applying to see what skills and qualifications they are looking for.

3. Show yourself in the most favorable light. The personal statement is your chance to sell yourself* to the admissions committee. Make the best out of this opportunity.

4. Make your story interesting. Include details, avoid general statements, and explain why the events in your life were significant instead of just describing them.

5. Be honest. Do not make up experiences or exaggerate accomplishments. You will likely be asked to talk about them later in the interview.

6. Make the essay easy to read. Admissions committees read hundreds of essays and will appreciate if you do the best you can to clarify your thoughts.

7. Be concise. If you can use fewer words to express the same idea, do it.

8. Start writing early. You will write your personal statement many times before you are satisfied with it. Ask a teacher or a counselor to read it and give you feedback.

9. Make sure you respond to every question in the prompt.

10. Make sure your essay has no spelling, grammar, punctuation, or formatting errors.

11. Do not copy anyone else’s personal statement. Statements are screened through detection systems and copying could have serious consequences for your application.

*sell yourself = persuade another person or persons that you are a worthy choice.

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EL Civics #49 Transition to College, Version A Page 1 of 2

Preparing for the Writing Assessment: Writing a Draft of a Personal Statement Write a four or five-paragraph personal statement essay to apply for a scholarship or acceptance into a higher education program. Follow your outline as you write.

Prompt: “Tell us why you want to pursue further education, and how your life experiences, personal qualifications, and educational background are compatible with the program to which you are applying.”

_____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ ©Continuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Department 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

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_____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________

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Essay Checklist Check your writing. Check Yes or No after each question. Then, exchange your essay with a classmate. Check each other’s essay.

Self Yes

Partner No

Yes

No

Content 1. Does the essay have 4 or more paragraphs?

2. Does it have a thesis that clearly addresses the prompt?

3. Do the supporting paragraphs have topic sentences?

4. Are there 2 or 3 supporting sentences in each paragraph?

5. Do the supporting paragraphs have concrete details or examples?

6. Does the essay have a concluding paragraph?

7. Does the essay have appropriate transition words to connect ideas?

Grammar and Mechanics 1. Does the essay have a variety of sentence structures?

2. Are the verbs in the correct tenses?

3. Are the words spelled correctly?

4. Are the letters correctly capitalized?

5. Are the periods, commas, and question marks correct?

Format 1. Is the first sentence of each paragraph indented?

2. Are there margins on all sides?

3. Is the essay neat and legible? ŠContinuing Education, San Diego Community College District, EL Civics Department 2016 6/13/2016 2:52 PM

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