This bookis aDD/lgromance TheMMCinthis bookis aDaddyDomandtheMFCidentifies as aLittle This is anactof role-playingbetweenthe characters and falls under the BDSMumbrella. This is a consensual power exchange relationship betweenadults Inthis storythere are spankings and discussions ofother forms ofdiscipline The MFCuses a pacifier and wearsadiaperatcertaintimesinthebook.
Irise up fromunder the hood ofmylatestproject, nearlyhittingmyhead as the glintingsunblinds me, to find mysister stompingacrossourdrivewaytowardthefrontporch.
“Summer and I were goingto go to promtogether We’ve beenworkingso hard to make moneyso we could get fancy dresses.Wewereevengoingtorentalimoandgotogetherinsteadofwithdatessinceit’soursenioryear.”
Iballupafistandclenchmyjaw MurphyPierce ThemanhasbeentormentingSummerandhermother’slivesforwaytoo long. He’s the reason Summer spends more time at our house than her own. I fucking hate the man. I can’t even count the number oftimes Nashand Ihave wanted to go over there and pummel the shit out ofhim But our dad always tells us the answertoviolenceisn’tmoreviolence,andifwewanttodosomethingaboutit,callthepolice.Whichwehave.Allofus.Me, Nash,Greer,andbothourparents We’veallcalledthepoliceonMurphyPierceatonetimeoranother Themessedupthingis,henevergetsarrestedbecausehisabuseisn’tphysical.Idon’tknowwhyhermomputsupwithit. Whyshewouldkeepherdaughterunderthesameroofashim.Mrs.Piercehasalwaysbeenthesweetestwoman.Bothsheand Summerdeservebetter
Ihold myhands over mychest, pretendingto be inpain. “Ouch. Thathurts. Or atleastitwould ifannoyingestwere an actualword,whichit’snot.”
Greerletsoutahuffatthesametimeasshestompsoneofherfeet Anothersignthatmakesmewonderabouther Oneof thesedays,I’mgoingtofindtheballstoaskheroutright,buttodayis not theday.I’dliketokeepmyballsrightwheretheyare. Unbruised
Whenshedisappearsintothehouse,Itakeafewstepsoutofthegarageandlookoverattherundownhousenexttoours.I spotSummerontheporchswing.Crying.Myheartsqueezesinmychest.Iwanttogopullherintomyarmsandholdheruntil all her sadness is gone I can’t I know she likes me, but we’ll onlyever be friends But I’mstill goingto fixthis for her becauseIcan’tstandseeingthosetearsinhereyes.
SUMMER
HOW COULD Ihavebeensostupid?Ishouldhaveknownbetter Ishouldhavehiddenitinabetterplace Now,mybestfriendis upsetbecauseIhadtobreakthenewstoherthatmyfatherstoleeverydollarI’vesavedthispastyearsothetwoofuscouldgo topromtogether.Ican’tbelievethis.Willmylifealwaysbelikethis?
No Absolutelynot Ihave two months until graduation, thenI’mleavingPine Hollow Evenifit’s onlyfor a couple of yearsforcollege.I’lltrytotalkmymomintocomingwithme,butIknowshewon’t.Idon’tunderstandwhyshechoosestobe witha manlike him She deserves so muchbetter Ido too None ofmyfriends have a dad like mine I’ve always beenso enviousoftherelationshipGreerhaswithherdad.It’sobvioustoeveryonehowmuchFrankBennettloveshiswifeandkids. Hell,sometimesitfeelslikeMr.BennettlovesmeasifI’moneofhisown.Beingoverattheirhouseislikebeingonvacation. Ineverwanttoleave.
He studies myface for several seconds Isquirmunder his scrutiny His jaw flexes, and thoughDane isn’t typicallyan intimidatingman,there’ssomethingabouthimrightnowthatscaresmealittle.
“Summer, lookatme.” He waits until Ido. “Good girl. Ijustwantto make itclear thatIwantyouto go have fun. The moneymeansnothingtome.Thisprommeanseverythingtoyoutwo.Itmakesmehappytobeabletotakecareofyouinthis way Iwantyoutoenjoyyourself Okay?Promisemeyou’llspendthemoneyonadressandwhateverelseyouwant?”
“Youmeanalottometoo,Summer Ican’twaittoseewhatdressyouchoose” Heatbloomsinmytummy.HesaidImeanalottohim.Andhecan’twaittoseemydress.Hekissedthetopofmyhead.He alsothreatenedtospankme LikeaDaddywould Like my Daddywould Maybethere’sachancehe does havefeelingsforme MaybehewantsmelikeIwanthim.
“WE LOOK SO GORGEOUS!”Greersqueals.
Inod, unable to keep the grinoffmyface I’ve never feltso beautiful The deep red dress the same as Dane’s classic musclecar brushesthefloorasIwalk,andIfeellikeaprincess.Thebodiceistight,givingmeanampleamountofcleavage. Notthatit’shardsinceI’mbustierthanmostofthegirlsmyage.TheskirtflaresoutinlayersoftullethatgivesitaCinderella feelandhidesmywidehipsnicely
Mr and Mrs Bennettspend the nexttenminutes makingus pose infrontofthe fireplace so theycantake pictures from everyangle.Ismilethroughitall,buttheentiretime,I’mwonderingwhereDaneis.Hesaidhecouldn’twaittoseemydress. Hadhemeantit?Orhadhejustsaidittosayit?
“Okay,okay,wewon’tkeepyou.Go,havefun.Behomebymidnight!”Mrs.Bennettsaysasshepushesusoutside. We’reabouttogetintothelimowhenDaneappearsinthedriveway,usingaclothtowipehishandsclean.Hisgazelands onmefirst,andIswearthecornersofhismouthtwitchasifhe’sfightingasmile Doeshelikewhathesees? His boots crunchover the gravel as he comes over to us. Ashiver works its wayup myspine. He smiles atGreer, then turnshisattentiontome
“Youbothlookbeautiful.”
“Thankyou,”wesayinunison.
“Doyougirlshaveenoughmoneyfordinner?”
Withthemoneyhegaveme,Ihaveplentyfordinner.Istillcan’tbelievehehandedmethosebillsliketheymeantnothingto him
Shehasapoint.Ido.It’sabadhabit.Whenyouworkonbroken-downcarsallday,youcomeupwithsomecolorfulwords tosaywhenthingsaren’tgoingthewayyouwantthem “Didyouhavefuntonight?”Iask,ignoringhercomment. “Yeah,”shesaysquietly “Didyouhavefunwith,uh,thatgirl?” Ishrug.“Itwasfine.Youdidn’tlookhappytoseeherwithme.” Summerstaresatmewithunreadableeyes.Thenherbottomliptrembles.Ifeellikeanasshole. “Ifyoulikeher,that’swhatmatters,”shefinallysays “Summer,”Ibegin,“Iknow youlikeme.AndI’mflattered.Butyoudeservebetterthansomeonelikeme.Youdeserveto getoutofthistown Gotocollege Meetsomebrilliantguywhomakesatonofmoneyandtreatsyoulikeaprincess” “WhosaysIwantsome brilliant guy who makes a ton of money?”shesnaps. Itcatches me offguard.I’ve always knownSummer tobe a bitsassy,butshe’s never snappedatme.Thenagain,we’ve alsoneverhadaseriousconversationlikewe’rehavingnow.
“Idolikeyou,Dane.Alot,”shewhispers.
“Iknow youdo I’ve always known Butyou’re onlyeighteen Youhave your whole life ahead ofyouand thatlife isn’t hereinPineHollow.”
“Howwouldyouknowthat?”
“I’veheardyoutalkingtoGreeraboutleavingthistownwhenyougraduate.” She bites her bottomlip and looks downat the ground. “It would be different if I had a reasonto stay. Or if someone wantedmetostay.”
Hereyesshinewithtears,anditbreaksmyfuckingheart.Ihavetostaystrong,though.Shedeservesbetter. “YouonlylikemebecauseI’molderandyourbestie’sbigbrother.It’sateenagecrush.You’llgetoverit.Youneedtogoto Washingtonand start your life Become the lawyer you’ve always dreamed ofbecomingand meet some doctor or judge or anyone whocangiveyouthelifeyoudeserve.WhocangiveyouwhatyouneverhadhereinPineHollow.”
Shewincesasatearrollsdownhercheek “You youdon’thaveanyfeelingsforme?” I can’t breathe. Everythinginside me is screaming, “Yes! Yes, I have feelings for you. Yes, I could picture being your Daddy Yes, I’ve thought about you in so many impure ways Yes, I want you to stay” Butallofthoseyesesareselfish.Ican’tbeselfishwhenitcomestoher.Shedeservesbetterthanthat. So, Ilie, “No. Idon’thave anyfeelings for you. We’re justfriends. Youneed to getover whatever youfeel for me and moveon”
Iturnaroundandwalkawaywithoutlookingback.IfIdo,Imightnotbeabletokeepgoing.Imightcrumble.Ilovemylife here in Pine Hollow I love being a mechanic But someone like Summer Pierce deserves more than that She deserves everythingandmore.Oneday,she’llthankme.Andoneday,maybeI’llstopthinkingabouther.
SUMMER
Present Day…
“MOM, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”
“I’mmakingapeanutbuttersandwich.Doyouwantone?”
Myeyes flickdowntotheketchupbottlemymother is holdingandpause.Ever sinceIarrivedhomeacoupleofmonths ago,she’sbeendoingthingsthatmakenosense.AndIfeelguiltyashell.Whydidn’tIcomebacktoPineHollowsooner?Why did I not realize her illness was progressing much faster than I thought? How long has she been making herself ketchup sandwiches?Hassheactuallybeeneatingthem?
Iswallow heavily, tryingto force the enormous lump lodged inmythroatbackdown. She calls me bya differentname everyday.Igaveupcorrectingherafterthefirstfewtimes.Itupsetsher,anditcanturnthewholedayfromgoodtoterrible.
Shepatsmyshoulderassheshufflesoutofthekitchen.IgiveherthebestsmileIcanmanage,butassoonasshe’soutof sight, Iletouta shakybreathand sniffle WhenIdecided to come home to spend some time withher, Ihad no idea whatI wouldbewalkinginto.Oneofherneighbors,whocameovereverydaytocheckonherandseeifsheneededanything,never toldmehowbadshewas Sonow,I’veextendedmyleaveattheoffice,whichonlystressesmeoutmore Formymom,I’llbe strong,butallIwanttodoiscurlupinaball,suckonmythumb,andcrymyselftosleep.Whyisbeingabiggirlsohard?
I’mhalfwaythroughmakingoursoupandsandwicheswhenmovementoutofthekitchenwindowcatchesmyeye.Bentover the engine ofhis classic Camaro, doingwho knows what withit, is the manwho, all these years later, still gets myblood pumpinglikeIjustranamarathon.Thesightofhimalsomakesmychestache.Thepainshouldhavegoneawayafterallthese years Whywon’titgoaway?
Aftertossingtheburnedsandwichintothetrash,Istartover,butthistime,IstayclosetothestovesoIdon’tgetdistracted again. Withthe food plated, Iset it all ona trayto take to the livingroom. As Iwalkin, Icatchmymomreachingfor the doorknob
I’M EXHAUSTED Idon’tknow ifthatwordcovers all ofwhatI’mfeeling Ifa windgusthitme,I’dprobablyfall rightover Despiteall that,I’mrestless.Itchy.Mystomachhas beenhurtingnon-stopsinceIgotbackhome.TheonlyreliefI’vehadis whenIgetachancetohangoutwithmyfriends They’vebeenalifesaversinceIgotback Ifitweren’tforourSundayFunday dates,I’dprobablybeabiggermessthanIalreadyam.
Maybe that’s all Ineed. Adaywithmyfriends inLittle Space where Icanforgetall myproblems. Iglance around my childhoodroomturnedguestsuiteandsigh.Evenafter all theseyears,Ihatebeinginthishouse.It’slikeIcanstill hear him here.Theyelling.Thedrunkenstumbling.Thecrying.
Suddenlymychesttightens,andit’sstiflinginhere I’mheadingtowardthefrontofthehousewhenIrunintomymom Her shouldersareslumpedasshesetsacordlessphonedownonthecharger.
“I’mgoingtobed,Janet”
Ifurrowmyeyebrows.“Everythingokay?”
She shrugs. “I keep calling Summer, but she never answers. I don’t think she wants to talk to me. Anyway, goodnight, Janet”
As soonas she passes me, I rushout to the front porchand pull the door behind me as a sob breaks free. It’s freezing outside,andmyskinprickles withgoosebumps,butIdon’tcare Ineedtheshockofthecold Ineedtheair Ineedtobreak downandnotworryaboutmymomseeingme.
Bigfattears roll downmycheeks Iflickthemawayas quicklyas theycome buttheywon’tstop Ican’tgeta hold of myself.MyentirebodyshakesasIloseit.
DANE
IfIgetonemorecalltopullsomeoneoutofaditch,I’mgoingtotearmyhairout.Especiallysincemostofthosecallshave beenteenagers outjoyridinginthe snow The news said to stayinside for a reason We’re used to gettingsnow inPine Hollow, but not this much all at once. Since I’mthe only business in town with a tow truck, I’mthe lucky one they’re calling.
WhenIstep outofmytruck, Ilookup and sigh Ilove the wayitfeels like the whole world goes quietwhenitsnows Everythingispeaceful.Everythingstops,anditgivesyouasecondtotakeabreather. Theflakesarehugeandfluffyastheyflutterdownslowlyfromthedarksky Astrangledsoundcutsthroughtheair Ilook around,tryingtofindwhereitcamefrom.
Shedoesn’tanswerme Instead,shecriesharder,andit’sbreakingmyheartintopieces Ican’tstandtoseeherlikethis If Idon’tdosomething,she’sgoingtostarthyperventilatingorgethypothermia.Ineedtogetherinsidewhereit’swarm.
Ittakes a while before her softsobs quiet. She’s strugglingto breathe throughher nose, so Ireachbackand grab some tissuesfromthenightstand,thenholdthemuptoherface “Blow,sweetgirl.”
“MymomthinksI’mhersister Shedoesn’tknowI’mherdaughteranymore” Fuck.Iknew her momhadbeendiagnosedwithdementia abouta year ago,butIdidn’tthinkitwas thatadvanced.Then again, I don’t see her momoutside veryoften Fromwhat mysister told me, Summer’s beenorderingpre-made meals and groceriestobedeliveredtoherandhiredalandscapingcompanytomaintainherproperty.Theneighbordownthestreetwas goingoverthereeverydaytocheckonher,soIthoughteverythingwasfine.
“IthoughtI’dbeabletotakeafew weeksoff,comehometospendtheholidayswithher,thengobacktoSeattleandget backtowork Now nowIcan’tleaveuntilIfigureoutwhattodoaboutMom There’snowayshecanlivebyherself It’snot safe.WhatkindofdaughterwouldIbeifIputherinahome?Shouldn’tIbetheonetotakecareofher?I’mjust…I’mstressed, andIneedsomekindofrelease,andIcan’tgetthatatmymom’shouse”
Iopenmymouthtoaskwhatshemeans,thenithitsme.She’sLittle.Shetoldmeyearsago.Thefewtimeswe’veseeneach othersincewe’veneverspokenaboutit,butaccordingtomysisterGreer,thegirlshavehadsomevideocallplaydatesover the years.Is thatwhatshe means byrelease? Or does she meana more intimate release? Mycocktwitches atthe thoughtof either.
Don’t think about that Think of something gross Jaxon naked Asher naked Okay, that’s fucking disgusting, and now I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to forget that vision. “Takesomebreaths,Summer Notallofthisneedstobefiguredouttonight” Asifsherealizeswheresheis,shetensesandrearsbacktolookatme.Hereyeswiden,andshestartstotrytoscramble awayfromme
Sheglaresatme,butI’mtoobusytryingnottostareatherhardnipplestocare Keyword,trying TherearealotofthingsI can force myself to do. Going to the doctor, for instance. Paying my ridiculously expensive cable bill. Eating vegetables. LookingawayfromSummerPierce’stautlittlenipples?Yeah,that’snotoneofthosethings.
Slowly,afraidtostartleher,Ieasethecoversbackandgetoutofbedontheoppositeside.“Littlegirl,youwerestanding outsideinyourbarefeet,nocoaton,nohat,cryingyoureyesout Ididn’tknowwhatwaswrong,andIdidn’twanttotakeyou into your house. Obviously, youwere outside so your momwouldn’t see you. So I brought youhere, where it’s warmand whereyou’resafetofallapartasmuchasyouneedto.”
Good gosh Nice going Sound like a petulant child much? No wonder Dane doesn’t take me seriously That’s probably not fair. I don’t know that he doesn’t take me seriously. But he wanted nothing to do with me when I was eighteen,sowhywouldhecarethatIwasfreezinginthecold?
I’d been practically hysterical when he’d scooped me up frommy porch, but I was with it enough to know what was happening.Iknew he’dbroughtmetohishouseandtuckedmeintohisbed,thenclimbedinwithme.Ishouldhavefoughtit fromthestart Itfeltsogoodtohavesomeoneelsetakethereinsandtakecareofme IknewIwassafewithhim,andhaving hisarmsaroundmecalmedmeallthewaydowntomybones.
He raises his eyebrows,puts his hands onhis hips, and damn.Idon’tthinkthis manknows how fine he is.The wayhis oncedarkhairhasturnedsaltandpepperwithage,andthewaythelinesaroundhiseyeshavedeepened Yeah,he’slickable Very,verylickable.
Howdoesheknow?ItoldhimIwasLittle,butthatwassolongago.Doesherememberthat?Imean,obviouslyhedoes. He’s asking me about Little Space Maybe Greer said something I’m going to kill her if she did After I ask a million questions,ofcourse.IneedtoknoweverysinglethingDanehaseveraskedorsaidaboutme.
Hereachesformeagain,onlythistimehegrabsmychinroughlyandforcesmetolookathim “Listentomeandlistengood.Justbecauseyou’retakingcareofyourmomdoes not meanyouneedtoputyourentirelife onhold Itmeans youneed to find balance Puttingyour needs onhold is nothealthyfor your mental or emotional health If you’renottakingcareofyourself,youwon’tbeabletotakecareofyourmom.So,I’mgoingtoaskyouagain,andI’dlikea
Ashiverrunsthroughmeatthethought I’vebeenspankedbefore Manytimes I’vebeentoacoupleofdifferentclubsin SeattlewhereI’vescenedwithexperiencedDaddies.NotoneofthemmademefeelremotelyasturnedonaswhatDanejust described. Maybe it’s because mybodyresponds to himinways it’s never responded to anyone else. Whichis why, during everysingleoneofthescenesattheclubs,IpretendeditwasDanewhowaswithme
Feelinga bitofcourage,Ireachouttorestmypalms againsthis warmchestandlookupathim “Thankyou,Dane For beingthereformetonight.Iknowit’sprobablythelastthingyouwantedtodealwith.”
Hisgrayeyesnarrow,buthedoesn’tsayanything Instead,heleansforwardandkissesmyforehead “Gotakeabubblebathandwatchananimatedmovie.Letyourselfgointoyoursmallerheadspace,evenifit’sonlyfora bit Everythingisgoingtobeokay,Summer”
Ispentlastnighttossingandturning,tryingtocomeupwithsomethingIcoulddotohelpSummerwithhermom.Ifeellikean asshole for notknowingthatMrs Pierce had declined so much I’mher neighbor I’ve knownthe womanpracticallymy entirelife.Ishouldhavenoticed.
WhenIfinallyrolloutofbedandlookoutside,Iletoutasighofrelief.It’sstoppedsnowingandsomeonecamebywitha plow Probablya couple of farmers withthe right equipment Pine Hollow certainlydoesn’t have a supplyof snowplows Hopefully,theclearroadsmeanIwon’tbetowinganyonetoday.
WhenGreerdoesn’tsayanything,Igroan.“I’msorry.Ididn’tmeantosnapatyou.IfoundSummercryingonherporchlast night Shetalkedtomealittlebit,butI’mstilltryingtofigureouthowbaditis Iwanttohelp,butI’mnotsurehow” “Shewascrying?”Greeraskswithashakyvoice. “Yeah.She’soverwhelmed.”
“I didn’t know. She hasn’t said anything. We text frequently, and we hang out every Sunday, but she hasn’t mentioned strugglingwithhermom.DoyouthinkIcandoanythingtohelp?”
I sigh Greer is right Those are personal details, and evenif Summer does use anyof those things, she might not feel comfortableusingthemaroundme.Hell,shemightnotfeelcomfortablebeingLittlearoundmeatall.Partofmehopesshetells metogotohellwhenIexplainmyidea,butanotherpartofmewantsthismorethanI’mwillingtoadmit.Ican’tbeSummer’s forever Daddy,butmaybeIcanbesomethingcasual andtemporaryfor her whileshefiguresthingsoutwithher mom Then, onceshegoes backtoSeattle,we canbothmoveonwithour lives,andIcangetover myinfatuationwithher.Ineedtoget overiteventually Evenifitkillsme Becauseitjustmight
SUMMER
anet,where’smycoat?”
Isqueeze myeyes shut for a briefsecond before Iglance up at mymom She’s wearingher coat Alongwithher pajamas.Andshestillhashercurlersinherhair.
This doesn’tmake sense. Imove pastmymomto go into her bathroomand sure enough, the bottle ofmedicine is inthe toilet Open Withallthepillssittingatthebottomofthebowl Shecomesinbehindme,lookingunsureofherself,andIforce myselfnottoloseit.Breakingdowninfrontofherwillonlymakethingsworse.
“I’msorry, Janet. Icouldn’tfind it. I’ll runto the pharmacyand geta refill. Itshouldn’tbe a problem. I’ve had to do it before.”
Mychest tightens, and that stupid lump returns. What kind of daughter amI? I’ve let mymomsuffer alone, doingwho knowswhateveryday,andsomethingbadcouldhavehappened.Evenwithmehere,she’sstillstruggling.
She seems tothinkaboutitfor a momentbefore she nods andheads backtowardthe livingroom Idon’tknow how she wasplanningtogettothepharmacyinthefirstplace.WhenIgotbackhome,ItookherkeysawaywhenIrealizedhowmuch shewasforgettingthings.
After Igetdressedinapair ofleggings,athick,slouchysweater,boots,ahat,andDane’sjackethenever tookbacklast night,IheadtowardMainStreet.Someroadshavebeenplowedbutnotallofthem.I’mprettysurethehairsonthebackofmy neckstandonendtheentiredrive
Iget inand out ofthe pharmacywithina few minutes. Thankfully, the pharmacist knows mymomand is able to get an authorizationtofillhermedicationearly
It’s snowingagain. IwishIcould build a snowmanor make snow angels and have a fundayplayingoutside withhot chocolatebreaks.It’saselfishthought,andIfeelguiltyforit.Mymomneedsme,andIkeepthinkingaboutwhatIwant.
Hisconcernonlymakesmecrackmore,andIletoutasob.Withoutanotherword,hegrabsmyhandandleadsmetothe passenger side ofhis truck, theneffortlesslylifts me up and buckles me in Isniffle and watchas he rounds the truckto the driver’sside.Assoonashegetsin,heturnstheheatuptofullblast.
Using the backs of my hands, I wipe my tears away. “I had to go to the pharmacy to get my mom’s blood pressure medicationbecauseshedroppedthebottleinthetoilet,andIwasdrivinghome,andIhitastupidpotholeandgotaflattire, andallIcouldthinkaboutwaswantingtoplayinthesnowandwhatkindofdaughteramIthatIwanttoplaywhenIneedtobe focusingonmymom?”
He stares atme witha blankexpressionuntil Istop rambling, thenwithouta word, he puts the truckindrive and heads towardourstreet.
IsitterriblethatIwantwhathe’soffering?ThatIwanttoforgetaboutmyresponsibilitiesandsubmergemyselfinmyLittle headspace? WhenIcame home, Ionlyplanned to be here for a couple ofweeks, so the onlytoyIbroughtwithme was my favoritestuffie.Ihadn’texpectedtobehereforthislong.IwouldhavebroughtacoupleofmybabydollsifIhadknown. SurelyDanehassomeblankpaperandpencils,soIguessIcoulddraw.It’snotmyperfectideaofadayinLittleSpace,but I’lltakewhateverIcangetatthispoint He’sright,Idoneedthis IthinkIneeditmorethanIrealized
Suddenly,I’mnotsosure this is a goodidea.It’s beentwentyyears since Ileftthis town,andIstill haven’tgottenover Dane HowwillIevergetoverhimifhekeepsDaddyingmelikethis?I’mgoingtoendupwithabrokenheart,butIcan’tfind itinmetocareenoughrightnow toputastoptoallofthis.IwantthismorethanIwantmynextbreath.HavingDaneasmy DaddyiseverythingI’vealwayswanted Evenifit’sonlyfortoday
Ithad brokensomethinginside ofme atthe time, and Iwas the onlypersonIhad to blame. I’d hurther and pushed her away AllbecauseIdidn’twanttoholdherback Istilldon’t ShehasherlifeupinSeattlewhereshe’shappyandsuccessful Assoonasshegetsthingsfiguredoutwithhermom,she’llleave.Onlythistime,I’mafraidshemightleavewithapieceofmy heart.
“Maybeyoushouldn’tbenaughty.ThenIwouldn’thavetotellpeopleyougotaspanking,”hescoldsplayfully. Jaxonhas beenmyfriendfor alongtime,buttruthbetold,he’s always beenafuckingstick-in-the-mud.Grumpyas hell. Until he metLeah. He’s still a grump, buthe’s mellowed quite a bit. Infact, Ithinkhe’s gettingsoft. I’d never tell himthat, though
“Goodforyou Youfinallygonnaadmittoyourfeelingsandclaimher?” Fuck. Inever should have told the guys whatwentdownbetweenme and Summer all those years ago. “Whydon’tyou worryaboutyourownlife?”
Ifeel himtense fromacross the room, buthe doesn’tsayanything. Instead, we workto geteverythingsetup insilence. I probablyshouldn’thavesaidit,butit’sthetruth I’vetriedtodateovertheyears I’veeventrieddatingvanillaguys But noneofthemwereDane.Theydidn’thavehismanners.Orhissignaturescent.Orhispassion.Orhisgoodlooks.Oranyof thethingsIthinkofwhenIthinkofhim.I’minmylatethirtiesandstillhaveacrushonmyneighbor.
My tummy does somersaults as I check the camera app “No I already gave her lunch, and she had her medication I suggested she workonthe blanketshe’s beenknitting, and she liked thatidea. She likes to watchdaytime shows, so she is usuallyprettypreoccupiedintheafternoons”
He stops and turns toward me. “Don’t ever apologize. She can’t help it, and neither canyou. We’ll figure it out, baby. Okay?Youdon’thavetodothisallalone.”
Thethicklumpreturnstomythroat,soInodandlethimleadmeovertohishouse It’swarmandcozywhenwewalkin I loveithere.It’s always beenasafeplacefor me.Mr.andMrs.BennetthadevengivenmeakeyatonepointwhenIwas a teenagerandtoldmeifIeverneededtogetawayfrommyfather,Icouldcomeoverdayornightwithoutasking Ineverusedit, butthefactthattheygaveittomemeanteverythingatthetime.
Itiltmyheadbacktolookupathim,aghostofasmilepullingatmylips.“Willyouspankme?” His eyebrows shoot up insurprise “It depends Do youwant that to be part of what we’re doing? If it is, I’ll follow through,andIwill spankyourbottomifyoumisbehave.”
We throw our arms around each other and hug Greer and Natalie introduced me to Leah when I came home for the holidays.Shehadjustmovedintotown.Sincethefirsttimewemet,we’vebeengreatfriends.It’slikewe’veknowneachother forever
Ipracticallychoke onair as Ilookup athim. Did he reallytell me to go potty? I’ma grownwoman. Idon’tneed that reminder.Wait.MaybeIdo.Allofasudden,Ifeelsquirmywiththeurgetopee.
Withasqueak,Ishakemyhead,thenturnandpracticallyruntothesmallpowderroom.WouldheactuallyhelpmeifI’d wantedhimto? Would Iwanthimto?I’vealwaysfeltthatI’mayoungerLittlelikemyfriends I’veworndiapersandtraining panties before inthe privacyofmyownapartment, and Iloved them. I’ve never experienced itwitha man, though, and the thoughtofDanedoingsomethingsointimatewithmeisbothterrifyingandexciting
We both freeze and stare at each other in shock I called himDaddy so easily, without a second thought It felt totally natural.MaybebecauseI’vebeencallinghimthatinmyheadforsolong.
