ANNE KEMP
CopyrightŠ2024byAnneKemp
Allrightsreserved.
Nopartofthisbookmaybereproducedinanyformorbyanyelectronicormechanicalmeans,includinginformationstorageandretrievalsystems,withoutwritten permissionfromtheauthor,exceptfortheuseofbriefquotationsinabookreview
For all of the readers who take their books with them to dinner, on the train for their daily commute, on vacation, on the plane, to the DMV⌠tucking their Kindles or that well loved paperback into their bags to sneak in a chapter when time allows (or even when it doesnât)
I see you.
WhenIboughtmycar afew weeks ago,IdidnâtthinkIâdhavetotakeittotheshopthreetimes inatwo-weektime frame.Seriously.ThisiswhyIstrugglewhenitcomestocommittingtothings.Obviously,somethingisupwithmy carselectionskills
âWell, Riley,â Dubs, our local mechanic, says as he peeks outfromunder the hood ofthe old Toyota Camry. âNotsureifitâsyouralternator,couldbeyourradiator,butIâmgoingtoneedtokeepittodaytorunsometests.â
âFirst, youcanâtgetitto start, thenthree outoffour tires go flat, and now it's a mysteryproblemâ Beside me, mybest friend,Dylan,wrapsanarmaroundmyshoulder.âYou,myfriend,haveterribleCAR-ma.â
Usingmyelbow,Inudgeherintheribsandbitebackalaugh Iâmwaytooirritatedtogiggle,evenifitisagoodpun
âWhat?âsheexclaims,throwingherhandsintheairwithmockhaughtiness.âWasthatnotgoodenoughforyou?â
Fine I crack a smile, pulling my lips tight into a thin line I try to show some teeth, but my lips rebel, quivering and contortingintowhatmustlooklikeanexaggeratedgrimace.
âDonâtevenknowifIcanhonorthefriendsandfamilydiscountwiththatface,âDubsteases.âWhatis that?â
Now,Iâmlaughing âYouguys,letmebemadforasecond,okay?â
âNo way,â Dylancalls over her shoulder as she heads to the backoffice, motioningfor me to follow her. âWe donâtdo angerhereatDubsâGarage Ithinkitâsahouseruleâ
IwalkintotheconfinedspacewhereDylanworksafewhourseachweek,keepingthebooksforherdadâsgarage.Theyâve beengettingbusier,sosheâsbeenspendingmoretimehere,evidencedbyher emergencymedical technicianuniformpiledin thecorner.
âDoingdoubledutytoday?â
Shenods,incliningherheadtowardthedesk âAssoonasIgetthroughthelastbatchofbillsandcallyouaHitchtogetyou tothebookshop,Iâmout.â
Iholdmyhands uptoprotest âYoudonâtneedtodothat,Ihave some capabilities Icanuse the appandrequesta ride throughHitchtogettoworkonmyown.â
Swipingherphoneoffthedesk,sheshakesherhead.âNoway.Thirdtimeintwoweeksyouâvebeenhere,girl.Letustake careofyourHitchbecauseyouârecertainlypayingalotofourbillsthismonth.â
She snickers as she pulls up the app onher phone, taps it a few times, thenputs it downintriumph. âRonaldo will be pickingyouupinhislittlewhiteFiatinlessthanfiveminutesâ
âRonaldo,huh?IhopeheâsItalianandsmokinghot.âStraighteningmyshirt,Ipointmythumbovermyshouldertothefront door âDidyoutellhimtomeetmeoutfrontoftheshop?â
âNo.Isuggestedyoutwomeetdowntheblockatthelaundromat.âDylanrollshereyes.âOfcourseheknowstocomehere. Youknowhowitworks.Youâvegottenasharedridebefore.â
âOhshush,IâvebeenthrownoffmygametodayâIpullmywalletoutofmypurseandwaveitintheair âDoyouguysneed mycreditcardnow?â
âNope Justgo meetRonaldo and his little white Fiatâ She points behind me âYour chariotawaits or atleast, itwill soon.â
âHa,âIsay,leaningacrossthedesktohugmyfriend âIâlltalktoyoulaterâ
ImakemywayoutoftheofficeandnavigatethroughthegaragepastthecarsthatarecurrentlyunderDubsâcare.Passingby mylittleredCamry,Ikissmyhandandtapthehood,sayingasilentgoodbyeandprayingitworksagainsoon.Nothingisworse thanbuyingacarandthenhavingitstopworkingrightafteryousignthepapersofownership
Adistantringcatches myattention. Lookingaround as Istep outonto the street, Irealize itâs myphone and the sound is comingfrominsidemypurse Shakingmyhead,IdigaroundinmybaguntilIfindthething,thenpullitoutandpressittomy
earwithoutlooking.Dangerous,Iknow.IansweritinmynewwaybecauseIâmdeterminedthatthisismyyear.Iâmgoingtobe aseriousprofessionalinallthethings.
Well,fingerscrossed âThisisRiley.â
Thechuckleontheotherendiswaytoofamiliar âSo,mybabysisterannouncesherselfnow?â
âYes,Travis,Ido.NowthatIâmsinkingmysavingsintoacateringbusiness,Ifigureitâsonlysmarttobeginaconversation inapositiveway unlikehowthisoneisgoingnow,âIfinish,crackingup âHowareyou?â
âCrazybusy.Andyou?Besidesbeingaconsummateprofessionalasyoukeepinsisting.â
âIâmirked,thatâshowIam.âSighing,IlookupanddownthestreettokeepaneyeoutforRonaldoandthatFiat.âMycarâs backintheshop,Iâmlatetowork,andMomneedsmetohavethemenureadybytheendoftheweekforthedinnershehasme doing.â
âDinner?â
âShecoordinatedacharityauctionfor thelocal foodbank,andsomeonewonadinner attheir homewithaprivatechef. When the original chef who was going to do it had to back out, unbeknownst to me, Dad volunteered yours truly as the substitute.Momquitereluctantlyagreed,inorder tohelpkickstartmynew âforayâasshecallsit.Therefore,sheâsbeenabit pushy.â
Yes,Ishouldbegratefulforthechance,however,Idonotwanttoomitthefactthatitdidstingfindingoutmyownmother hadtobetalkedintoallowingmetodothis.Iwasnotaskedtodoit,insteadIhadtomakeacaseformyself.Eventhen,she neverconfirmedIhadthejob IonlyfoundoutafterthecharityauctionwasoverthatIwasdoingitwhensomeonecalledmeto setupthedateforthemeal.
Morechuckling.âPushy,ourmom?Never.â
âAreyoukidding?Talkaboutpressure.ItâsmyfirstrealgigdoingaprivateeventandknowingwhatIdocouldalsoaffect herreputation,asshekeepsremindingme,makesmyshouldersknotup.âDraggingmytoealongontheconcrete,Ifollowaline inthesidewalk,theoldsayingâsteponacrackbreakyourmotherâsbackâechoinginmyear Ipullmyfootawayfromitasif mymothercanseeme.Ifshedid,sheâdprobablyaccusemeoftryingtokillher.âIswear,Travis,Ijustwantthatwomantobe proudofme Totellmesheisonlyonetimeâ
âYeah,Iknow.ThatâswhyIcalled Ijustgotoffthephonewithher.SheaskedifIâdcomebackandworkwithyoufora night,tohelpserve.âHissighslamsagainstmyearovertheline.âShewasprettyrelentless,tothepointItoldhertoleaveit alone. I also reminded her that sheâs the one who put your name forward, so she needs to calmdownand trust you. But, I figuredifshewasthatintensewithme,Ishouldcheckinwithyouandseehowyouâredoing.â
Mybigbrother Always the bestfriend a girl could ever askfor Apaininmyrear growingup, since weâre three years apartinage.Buthewasmyheroandprotector,andstillis,really.
âThanksfortheremindertohireaserver,âIsaywithachuckle âIâmhanginginthere Ijustdonâtwanttostressashardas Iam.Itâsabitofajuggle.â
Not that I canât handle it,IthinkasIstepoutintothestreetandcranemyneck,lookingaround.Itâsaprettystreetinaquiet partofSweetkiss Creek Itâsinthebusiness district,butthisparticular endis alsofor moreindustrial businesses likeDubsâ Garage.Across the street,thereâs anoldrenovatedVictorianhome witha landscapingcompanyandanattachedarchitecture firm,andarowofbusinessesboastingautopainting,signmaking,kitchenjoinery,andevencarpet
âAnditdoesnâthelpthatIâmlateforworkandwaitingforaride,âIadd.
âSoon, youwonât have a boss that youhave to answer to, mydear, because youâll be the bossâ Always encouraging Again,bestbigbrotherever.âGeorgieknowssheâsluckytohaveyouworkingforher,butshealsoknowsitâsapitstoponthe RileyRichardsparadetoawesome.â
âYouâreright Plusworkingatthebookstoregetsmefiftypercentoff,sothereâsthatâAflashofwhiteattheotherendof thestreetcatchesmyeye.IcanâttellifitâsaFiat,soIkeepaneyeonthecarreadytoflagitdownassoonasitcomescloser. âSo,whatwereyoucallingMomaboutanyway?â
âArenâtyouaNosyRosy?âheteases.âSomethinghascomeupandcircumstanceschangedonmeprettyquicklyinthelast fewdaysand,well surprise!Iâmintownâ
âThatâsawesome!âGlancingup,thewhitecarappearstobepullingtoastopabouttwoblocksawayandisnowsittingon thesideofthestreet,hazardsblinking.Squintingmyeyes,IâmprettysureitâsaFiat.âMaybewecanhavelunchtoday?â
âTodaycouldbehard IhavebusinessherethatIneedtodealwith,funnilyenoughâ
Thatisfunnyconsideringmybrotherisasportsagentforseveralhigh-profilecelebritysportsstars.Castingmyeyesdown theroadagain,thewhitecarismovingalongwithitshazardsstillblinking ItâscloseenoughnowIcanseetheredcircleofthe Fiatlogoonthefrontofthecar,andIhonestlycanâtwaitanymore.
âWhatkindofbusinessisit?âImanageasIstepintothestreetagain,tuckingthephoneundermychinandholdingittight againstmyshoulderwhileIusebotharmstowavemadlyatthedriveroftheFiat.Heâsgottobelost.
âWell,âhebegins,onlytopause.âAh,Riley,givemeasec,Iâvegotaclientontheotherline.â
Thelinegoessilent,butitâsperfecttimingbecausethelittlewhiteFiatwithamanbehindthewheelhaspulledupnextto me.
Assoonasheslowsdown,Istepout,makingsureIâminhisview Iâvebeenstandingobscuredtosomedegreeinbetween twocarsparkedonthesideofthestreet.Givinghimawave,Igrabthehandleofthebackdoorandtugitopen.
âHeythere,â Imanage, throwingmyselfinto the backseat âIneed to getto the Pages and Prose Bookshop atninety-nine MagnoliaTreeLane.â
WhenIdonâtsomuchas geta gruntofrecognitionor acknowledgment,Iturnmyattentiontothe driver inthe frontseat, whoiscurrentlyfrozeninplacewithonehandgrippinghissteeringwheelwhiletheotherholdsaphonetohisearashestares straightahead.Slowlyhiseyesmaketheirwaytotherearviewmirrorandhetiltshisheadtothesideastheynarrow.MaybeI spoketoofastbecausehelooksconfused
âNinety-nineMagnoliaLane,please?âPeeringoverhisshoulderandoutthewindshield,Ipointdownthestreetinfrontof us âGototheendofthisstreetandtakearightâ
Again,ablankstaremeetsme.Iâmabouttopointoutthathecouldputhisphoneonspeakerifhewantstotalkanddrive, butIdonâthaveto Hemuttersagoodbyeandendsthecallhewasonandtosseshisphoneontotheseatnexttohim Finally,he blinks,nodshishead,andputsthecarindrive.
Rightthen,Travisisbackinmyear.âHey,sorryaboutthat.Iâmback.â
âAndIâmonmywaytoworknowâMaybe Fingersarecrossedandthejuryisstillout,butwearemoving âOhgood,âhemumbles.âThenImaygettoseeyousoon.â
âWhatâsgoingon?â
âIâllexplainmorewhenIseeyou,butIâvegotoneofmyguyscomingintotowntostayforabreak.â âOneofyourguys?â
âHeâsanicehockeyplayerfortheRiverCityRenegades.Agoodguy,butheâshadafewhurdleslately.âThereâsalullin theconversationwhenIhearabeep,signalinganotherincomingcallonhisend.âHey,Riley,sorry,butIneedtotakethiscall, too Butlook,Iâmrightbythebookshop IâllbearoundsoIcansayhibeforeIheadovertoMomandDadâs,okay?â âSure,butwhyâŚâTheclickinmyeartellsmethateventhoughIâmnotdone,Travisis.
Sighing,Ithrowmyselfagainstthebackoftheseat,watchingthesceneryofthisquaintsmalltownIliveinbreezepast Thesidewalksaredecoratedwithcheerfulflowerbaskets,burstingwithvibranthuesthatmirrorthewarmthofthelocals here.Antiquelamppostsareadornedwithribbonsofgreeneryandswathedwithfabricreflectingtheseason.Sinceitâstheend of March, the decoratingcommittee has done a pastel greento celebrate bothSt. Patrickâs Dayand Easter, allowingfor a double-dipandgivingthemabreak.Atnight,thelampscastasoftglow,creatinganenchantingatmosphereonourmainstreet.
Passingbyarowofboutiques,IspotthesignsfortheSweetkissCreekSpringFair,whichiscomingupinafewmonths Another oneofmymomâs manypies thather fingers aresolidlyplantedin.Tosaysheâs anintegral partofthecommunityis likesayingGeorgeWashingtonwaskindathefirstPresident Sheâsthetypeofwomanwhorunsabusinesswithmyfatherand hasherselfspreadthinacrosscommitteesandcommunitygroups,helpingoutandleadingthechargetokeepSweetkissCreek theamazingplaceitistolivenow.
Sheâsabitofalegend,withher friendsall relyingonher todothings,butfor usathome,shecanbeabitofadictator EvenDadcanâtescapesomedays,butheâllalwaystellusshemeanswell.
Whenthecar begins deceleratingfor astoplight,Icomeoutofmytouristhazeinthebackseatofthis strangerâs car and realize weâve gottenoff-path.Ifthis guyis goingtotrytomake moneydrivingarounda Hitch,heâdbetter geta mapis all I gottasay
âHey,sorrytobeabackseatdriver,butyouâregoingthewrongway.âWhenIleanforwardtotaphimonhisshoulder,he jumpsatthesametimeasoundemitsfromthepassengerseatthatâslowandrumblyandalotlikegrowling.
Glancingdown,IcryoutwhenIseearow ofteethbaredinmydirection TossingmyselfasfarbackasIcangowithout enteringthetrunk,Iclutchmybag.
âWhatisthat?Isitsupposedtobeinyourcar?â
âItâsmydog,âheanswersflatly.âAndyes,Poshisallowedtobeinmy car.â
âPosh?âAnglingmyselfaroundsoIâmbehindthedogâsseat,Igetabetterviewofmyno-personalitydriver Heâshuge,and now thatIâmpayingattention,helooksreallyfunnystuffedbehindthesteeringwheelofaFiat.Judgingfromhissize,Iguess heâseasilyoversixfeettall.Andheâsnothardonmyeyeseither,hisjawlinesoperfectthatcallingitchiseledfeelstrite.His side profile is a studyofsculpted masculinity, and Iâmkinda drawnto the rugged vibe heâs gotgoingon Thereâs a hintof stubbleonhischinandcheeks,butheâsfairlyclean-cut.
WhenIstartfeelingalittleweirdedoutbymyowncreepinessatstaringatthisguy,Iturnmyfocusbacktotheroadahead Notmuchfarther to go, Isee the streetsignfor Magnolia Lane. Flickingmyeyes backinhis direction, Iamnotseeingany movementthattellsmeheâsslowingdown.Honestly,Ihavenoclueifheâsseenit,andatthespeedheâsgoing,wewonâtmake theturn,notwithouttakingouttheflowershoponthecorner,andwecanâthavethat.
âHey.âPointingoverhisshoulder,Iindicateintheoppositedirection,thewayweneedtogo.âThatway,dude.â
Aheavysighechoesfromthefrontofthecarandhehitsthebrakes.Fortheloveoftheheavensdoesheeverhitthebrakes. Asheslamshisfootonthebrakepedal,thewholemomentfeelslikeadramaticstageperformanceratherthanaroutinedriving maneuver The brakes squeal inprotest, the sound reminiscent of anexaggerated cartoonscreechas the vehicle jolts to an abrupthalt,asifithadjustrealizeditwasthepunchlinetoacomicaljoke.
Thetires,caughtoffguardbythesuddencommandtoceaseallmovement,letoutaseriesofcomicalchirps,asifprotesting theunexpectedinterruptionoftheirforwardmomentum.Iâmprettysureweâvecapturedtheattentionofanyoneonthesidewalk aswellasanyandalloftheretailshoppersinthearea
Thevelocityoftheturnpushesmeagainstthebackdoor,myfaceplantingonthewindow.Smooshedfortheworldtoseeas we drive through the small but fairly crowded shopping district. Iâmstill peeling a nostril away fromthe glass when Mr. Johnson,whoownstheflowershop whichIjustsavedfromfull-ondamage,thankyouverymuch wavesmyway
Somewhereinthe distance,a phone is ringing.Itcouldbe mine,butIhave noidea where itis now.Iâmalsohopingthe driverâsdogisokayupthereandnotscrunchedintotheglovecompartmentnow âAreyoukiddingme?âImanagewhenthecarfinallylurchestoastop.Thisguydoesnâtevenstopinfrontofthebookshop, either âAreyounewhere?Isaidninety-nineMagnoliaTreeLaneâ
Darkeyesmeetmineintherearviewmirror.Hecockshisheadtothesideandholdsmygazewithanintensitythatfillsmy gutwithaheatIcanâtdecipher.Isitgood?Isitbad?Idonâtknow.IâmjustthankfulI'maliveâŚbutIalsodonâtwanttopullmy eyesawayfromhis
Whatiswrongwithme?
Myphonestartsringingagain Lookingaroundthebackseat,Ifindmybagwhereitâslandedonthefloorandpullittomy lap,diggingthroughit.
âSeriously.Youandyourlittledogshouldnotbeinchargeofchauffeuringpeoplearound.âPointingoutthewindow,Itap myfingernailontheglass.Withanimosity?Ohyoubet.âThisisseventy-nineMagnoliaTreeLane.â
âWell,atleastyouâreontherightstreet.âHespeaks.Andasecondlater,healsoturns around,flingingonearmover the passengerseattoanglehimselfmyway âYouknow,ifIwassoinclined,Iâdchargeyouextraforthistripâ âExtra?â
âNotonlydidyougetatourofthetown,butIthrewinalittleexcitement,tooâTherearebrightgoldenfleckssparklingin thosebrowneyesofhis.IfIwasnâtsomad,Iâdbemoreintoit,butnotnow.âYouseemalittlepent-up.â
âExcuseme,didyousaypent-up?âHuffing,Iputmyhandonthedoorhandleandtugonit,hopingforsomedramaticflair tomatchourentrance.Only,thedoordoesnâtopen.Thinkingitâsstuck,Itryagain,onlytobemetwithlaughter. Asoftandmechanicalclinkresonatesinthecar.Thisguyandhisbigbrowneyesarestillstaringmedown. âChildlock,âhesayswithawink
I quirk my eyebrows. âI can see the review Iâmgonna leave now. âOne star for being a horrible driver and not very hospitableââ
Fromsomewhereinthefront,thereâsanotherlowrumbleofagrowl. Rollingmyeyes,Iopenthecardoor.âItâstotallygoingtoaffectyourrating,youknow.â
Eversoslowly,hedragshiseyesawayfrommineandheshrugs âIreallydonâtcareâ âYouaresorude,âImumbleasIclimbout,myphoneringingyetagain.ThistimeIpressittomyearwhileIâmslamming thecardoorshut âHello?â
Spinningaround,IâmsurprisedwhenIfindmybrother standinginfrontofme.Bewildered,Iholdupafinger for himto waitasDylanâsvoicecomesacrosstheline
âWhereareyou?âsheinquires,hervoicefilledwithconcern.
âWellâŚâIsnort.âItâsalongstory,butthatHitchyougotme?Thisguyisunbelievable.IbarelyâŚâ
âHitch guy?â Dylan interrupts me âThatâs why Iâmcalling Ronaldo has been waiting outside for you for the last five minutes.Youârenotwiththerightperson,Riley!Whereareyou?Whoareyouwith?Ohmygosh,areyousafe?â Iâmreallyconfused now, thatâs what I am Like if I had a title, it would be the Queenof Confusion Iâd skip Princess altogether.Fastlearner.
âSafe?Definesafeâ
Movementcatches myeye andIâmhorrified,butalsokindofproud,as mybrother takes twogiantsteps over tothe car, reachingtowardthedriverâssidedoor.Travismusthaveseentheinsanewaythismancamecareeningdownthelane,andnow myprotectivebigbrotherisgoingtokickhisbutt Therewasatimeinmylifewhenthismomentwouldhavebeenmortifying, buttodayisnotoneofthem.
Standingstill,withthephonepressedtomyear,IwaitforTravistoflingopenthedooranddragthisguyoutofthecarto yellathim.Askhimwhatonearthhethoughthewasdoingdrivinglikeamaniacwithhissisterinthecar.Butno.Hedefinitely doesnâtdothat.
Travisopensthedoor,andthenheshakestheguyâshand.
SHAKESTHEGUYâSHAND?
Iâmsureinsomeotherparalleluniversethiswouldbeahilariousmoment,butIâmsorattledandpuzzledthatIcannotmake headsnortailsofwhatâshappening.Mybrotherandmymaniacdriverarelaughingtogether. âRiley,âTraviscallsout,beckoningmeover Trepidatiously,Itakeasteptowardthedeathmobile. âWhat?âIsnap âMeetJakeDecember,myclientandtheplayerfromtheRiverCityRenegadesIwastellingyouabout.â
Whenanagitated,pushy,attractivestrangerjumpsintothebackseatofyourcar,howdoyouthinkyouwouldhandleit?
Me,well,IfiguredIhadtwooptionsatthemoment: onewastoaskhertokindlyremoveherselffrommyvehicle before I called the cops But, Iâma bigguyand amknownfor takingcare of myself, so did I consider forcible removalonmyownterms?
Ofcourse,butonlyforamoment.Thatâsjustanaturalinstinct.Comeswithmydayjob.Playingicehockeyforateaminthe AmericanHockeyLeague,Iâvehadtodealwithmyfairshareofplayersandfanswhogetalittlebitaggressive Guysusually eitherwanttogetaphotowithmeorfightme,neitherofwhichissomethingIenjoy,butIâlltakethephotooverafightanyday. Andthewomenhavepulledsomeamazingstuntstogetmyattention Themajorityofmyfemalefansarecool,butthereâsthe one percentthatsends me photos ofthemwearingmyjerseyand nothingelse. The lastone Igotwas a full-onphoto shoot someonehadgonetothetroubleofcoordinating,completewithpads,skates,andstick Sheputthepuckinbetweenherteeth anditwasweird.
But, when I realized this one was harmless and only focused on her phone, I made my choice and today, I chose adventure Themomentthoseaquamarineeyesslammedintomine,Ihadtoseewhereweweregoingandwhoshewas Itâsnot everydayafeisty,beautifulwomanlandsinthebackseatofmycarinanewtownandgivesmeorders.
Now,watchingherheadswivel backandforthfrommybestfriendandthenbacktome,IâmreallygladIgotaticketfor this ride.Betterthanarollercoasterpark.
âJakewho?âsheasks,rockinghereyesmywayagainandtakingagood,longlookatme,dragginghereyesfrommyhead tomytoes.
Mybestfriendalsohappenstobemyagent.âDecember.âIsayitsharperthanintended,butthankfullyTravissnorts,turning tomeandmouthingtheword,âSorryâ
Butthisone,sheâsdefiantandremindsmeofawetcat.
Sheputsahandonherhipandlookssquarelyatme âIsyourlastnamereallyamonthoutoftheyear?Andwhoareyou anywaytogoaroundpickingpeopleupandactinglikeyouâretheirdriver?â Meow.
Travisâseyesbouncebetweenmyselfandhissister,prettymuchlacedwithworry.Ihaveafeelingshemightbethewild cardinthefamily.
âYouknow,Iconsideredchargingyouoncewegottoyour destination,butthewildlookinyour eyesIâmgettingnow is paymentenough.â
âChildrenâTravisholdsahandupinbetweenus âRiley,JakeisstayinghereforaweekwhileInegotiateacontractfor him.Heâsfoundhimselfwithsomeunexpecteddowntime,soheâsgettingalittlerestandrelaxation.â
Thosesea-greeneyesflashmywayagainasshelocksmeintoagaze.Iâmsuresheâsstillabitperturbedabouttheearlier miscommunication,butthereâsalittlesnapinsidemethattellsmenottopullaway Itâslikeasnapofelectricity:playfuland newandreallyintriguing.Whenshedoesfinallypullhereyesfrommine,thatlittlesnapfadesawayandIremindmyselfthat thiswomanisnâtjustanybeautifulstrangertome
Sheâsmyagentâssister.Myagentwhoalsohappenstobemybestfriend.YouseewhereIâmheaded?
Yeah Sheâsmybestfriendâssister
Butsheissassy.Andcute.Butsoverysassy.
âSo,JakeDecemberisrelaxinghere,huh?âshepurrs.
Iknewit MychestpuffsalittlewithprideasIholdmyshouldersup âHaveyouheardofme?â
Iwanttoshovethewordsbackintomymouthassoonastheyareout.Howcreepydidthatsound? Have you heard of me? Whatatool
âNo,Ihavenât.âAwickedgrinplaysonherlips.âIsitafakename?Andifso,whyDecember?âShetiltsherheadtoone sideandnarrowshereyes,hertoneveeringmoretowardplayfulnessasshewhispers,âItâsbecauseyoulikeTaylorSwift,isnât it?â
Relentless.IthinkIâmgoingtolikeSweetkissCreek.
âItâsDecemberbecausethatâsmydadâsgivennameâTurningmyattentionbacktothecar,IleanintogetPoshoutofher spotinthepassengerâsseat.IfanyonehadtoldmebackinthedaythatmylongestrelationshipwouldbewithaFrenchbulldog, sixyears andcountingthankyouverymuch,Iwouldhave calledthema liar The onlyother relationshipIâve hadfor a nice longstretchistheoneIâvehadforthelastfiveyearsâŚwithTravis.
CradlingPoshinmyarms,IturnaroundandfacetheRichardssiblings.Thereâsalotofsimilaritybetweenthesetwo,butI thinkTravisisprobablytheniceroneinthefamily
RileypointstoPosh.âDoesshetravelwithyoueverywhereyougo?â
âIfIcantakeherwithme,sheâscomingâ
âIhopeyoudonâtshoveherinacageandputherintheâŚwhatâsitcalled?âShewavesahandintheairasshetriestofind theword âTheluggagecompartmentwhenyouflyâ
âIwouldnevertreatherthatway,âIsay,cooingandscratchingPoshbehindtheears.âSheâsnotawomanIâdeverwantto cage.â
DoIsaythatlastpartalittlepointedly,winkingatherasIdo?Ohyoubet
PlacingPoshdownonthesidewalk,Istandupandcrossmyarms.âIalsodonâtthinkitâscalledaluggagecompartment.â
Sherollshereyes âWhatever Whyareyouheretochilloutattheveryendoftheseason,anyway,whenicehockeygames arestillbeingplayed?Iâmnoexpert,butIfeellikethatdoesnâtbodewellforyou.â
âOkay, weâre done. Letâs not play twenty questions, please,â Travis, ever the voice of reason, says as he smacks his sisterâsarm.âWhatiswrongwithyoutoday?â
Hereyesflicktomine,flashing.âYoumighthavethesamereactionifyouhadsomeonepretendtheywereyourdriver,then takeyouontheridefromhellâ
âWasitthatbad?âThecornersofmylipsturnupinstinctivelywitheachdramaticwordcomingoutofhermouth.âIgotyou hereinonepieceâ
Rileyhuffs,squaringhershoulderstolookatherbrotherbeforeincliningherheaddownthestreet.âIneedtogettowork, âcauseIâmreallylatenow,butyouknowwhereIâllbe.Sostopbywhenyoucan.â
Hereyesreturntomine,butshedragsthemacrosstowhereIâmstandingrealslow.Likereeeeeaaallllslllloooowwwww. OnlySouthernwomenwhoarewet-beemadcanmakesomuchnoisebycastingtheireyeslikethat,andman,sheâsgood.
Shakingherhead,sheturnsaroundandwalksaway,wavingahandintheair
âWow,âImanage,turningtoTravis,whoâsstandingbesidemelaughingwithhisarmsfoldedacrosshischest.âYousaid shewasheadstrong,butisshealwaysthatmoody?â
âNo,infact,Iâmalittlesurprised.Sheneveractslikethat.Dadalwayscallsherourrayofsunshine.Iâmtheonewhoused tobeabitofanirritatingcrank.â
âYeah,IguessIâveseenthatsideofyouâ
âMostlylately.âHeshoveshishandsinhispockets.âAndthanksforcomingheretotakeatime-out.Honestly,Ithinkitâs bestforyourreputationandforyourcareerthatyoujuststepbackandbreatheforaweek Iâllgetyournewcontractnegotiated fortheRenegadesandâŚâ
Myshouldersslumpandasighescapesmylips
Traviscockshisheadtotheside.âWhat?â
âItâsveryâŚâ
âHumbling?âheoffers
âEmbarrassing,âIrespond.âHowmanypeoplegetletgoforfightingâŚinagamewherefightingisaprerequisite?â
âItâsnotaboutthefight,itâsaboutthewayitwentdownwiththeBladesâHecrosseshisarms,sizingmeup âYouâregoing tohavetomakegoodwithyouroldteammatesifIcanwranglethisplacementbacktotheRenegades,youknow.WhenIthink backtohowyouleftthem,thephraseâoutinablazeofgloryâcomestomindâ
Ihangmyhead.âYeah,Iâvethoughtaboutthat.AnditâsabridgeIâmgoingtocrosswhenthetimecomes.â
âTheownerswantyouback,butthecoachisonthefence.âBeforeIcansayaword,Travisholdsahandintheairtostop me âIâmgoingtohaveitallfiguredoutsoon Allgoingwell,youâllbeplayinginthelastfewgamesoftheseason Withyour oldteam.â
IâmprettyluckytohavesomeonelikeTravisonmyside SomeoftheplayersIâvegottentoknowovertheyearshavehad agents and managers around themwho are only in it for the money and the little bit of fame they sometimes get for being associated withthe rightplayer who is onthe rise. ButTravis genuinelycares aboutall ofhis clients. Iknow he keeps his rostersmallonpurposesohecankeepthingsonamoreintimatelevelwithhispeople,ashesays.
Forinstance,howmanyagentswouldhavetakenmeoutofthecityandawayfromtheAHLfarmteamthathadjustfiredme
(thanks,JerseyCityBlades),andinsistedIcometohishometowntorest meaningtohideandlickmywounds.
âYouârethebest,Travis,thankyou.â
âLetâsjustmakesuretokeepyourheadinthegamewhileyouârehereâHewhipsouthisphoneandpullsupsomenotes heâs made, handingthe device to me. âThereâs a new winter sports arena thatâs about five miles outside of town, and Iâve spokenwiththemaboutyouâ
âCool,man.âIscrollthroughhisnotes,clickingonthewebsiteattached.âWillIbeabletopracticethere?â
âWell, when youâre not pretending to be a Hitch driver, yesâ He laughs, then nods to a coffee shop as his stomach grumbles.âBeforewecheckyouintothebed-and-breakfast,letâshopinhereandgrababite,cool?â
Iglancedownatwheremygirlissittingonthesidewalkbesideus.âIsPoshallowed?â
âThereâsapatio,âTravissays,crackingupashepointstoit âYougrabatable,andIâllgetussomethingâ
AsItakeaseatontheoutdoorpatioofthecafe,rightintheheartoftown,Iâmimmediatelystruckbythelivelyenergythat surroundsme Positionedalongthebusymainstreet,thelittlehavenoffersafront-rowviewofthedailyhustleandbustle
ThepatioitselfexudesSoutherncharmwithitscozysetup;wrought-irontablesandchairs,paintedincheerfulhues,invite patrons to relaxand soakinthe ambiance Cushions adorned withfloral patterns provide a comfortable place to rest, while woodenbarrelsrepurposedintotablesaddarustictouchtothescene.Overhead,stringlightscrisscross,theirbulbscatching thesunlightandshimmeringastheyswayinthebreeze.
Despite the constant flow of people passingbyonthe sidewalk, the patio feels like a tranquil oasis Potted plants and bloomingflowers line the edges, offeringa splashofgreeneryand a sense ofpeace amidstthe urbanchaos. Itâs a welcome respitefromthenoiseandcommotionofthestreet
WaitingforTravistoreturn,Iscantheothertables.Therearesomefolkssittingnearby,eyeingme.Myeyesmeetthedude sittingthere,andhegives meacurtnodofthehead,mouthingtheword,âRespect.âWeird,yes,butagain,Iâmusedtoit.At leasthedoesnâtfallinthecategoryofwantingtofightme.NotthatIcanevenunderstandwhyanyonewouldwanttofightme, butIguesstheyseeabigguywhoplayshockeyandtheythinkitâscoolormaybetheyhavesomethingtoprove.
Andfighting NotthatitâssomethingIwanttodo,butIuseitfortheice ButitâsalsothereasonIâminthepredicamentIâm innowâŚbecausewhatstartedontheice,gottakenofftheice.Andthensome.
Sittingandlookingaroundthequaintscene,mythoughtswanderbacktothatspitfireofasister Riley Thelookonherface whensherealizedIwasTravisâsclientandnotthepersonwhowassupposedtopickherup.Thatverylookisgoingtokeep thismanveryhappyforalongtime.
âHere.âTravisslidesacupofsomethinghotinfrontofmealongwithacroissant,settlingintothechair acrossthetable withthesameorder.HepointstoPosh,wholookslifelessatmyfeet.âIssheokay?â
âOhyeah,sheâsnotdead Justdramaticâ
Travissitsbackandlaughs.âIâmsorry,butitâsjustfunnytoseeyoudotingoversuchasmalldog.â
âSheâstheonlywomaninmylifeforareasonâAndaverygoodoneatthat âYeah.â Travis nods his head inunderstanding. Weâve knowneachother for a few years now. He was one ofmyinner circle who satbyand witnessed Hurricane Greta and her destruction, or rather her attemptatit. âThatwomancame inas a hurricanebutwasdowngradedtowhat,atropicalstorm,fairlyquicklyâ
âShedidherdamage.âAsshestilldoes.Lessonstoallofyoubuddingathletesoutthere:ifyoudateasportsreporter,think abouttheconsequences âAndaccordingtothestoryinthepaperthismorning,sheâsstilltryingtotakeherdigsâ
âIsaw thatone.âDecember firedfromtheBladesbeforeMay.ââTraviswinks.âTerribleattemptonher partataplayon words Donâtlethergettoyouâ
âEasytosaywhenitâsnotyourreputationthatâsgettingattacked.â
âAgain,thatâswhyweârehere.âTravispopsthelastbiteofhiscroissantinhismouthbeforetossinghiscoffeeback.He smackshishandstogether,remnantsoftheflakiestcroissantIâveseenanywhereflyingintheair Webothwatchinslowmotion asarogueflakemanagesitswayacrossthetable,floatingthroughtheairandlandingonmylowerlip.
âSeriously,âIsay,pointingtotheflake
Travis laughs. âSorry. But theyâre good and it was chocolate cinnamon. Holy smokes, the perfect blend of sugar and pastrytostartthedayâ
IgrabmycoffeeandtakeasipasTravisâsphonebeeps.Hestaresatthescreenwithalookofdissatisfactionthatmakesmy toesactuallycurl.
âWellâHesighsheavily âOurfavoritereporterhasnowtakenherfighttosocialmediaâ Heturnsthephonearoundtoshowme.âIdonâtgetit.Itâsonlysocialmedia.â Travisshakeshishead âNo,myfriend,sheâssharingherstoryaboutyouonsocialmedianow Sheâsbeengiventhepower tobeonappslikeTikTokandInstagram,sosheâllreachawholenewaudience.â Iâmcluelesswhenitcomestothisstuff.âShehasapaper.Thatâsenoughaudience,isnâtit?â
âDemographics,myfriend.Newspapersarelosingtheirbase,sotheybranchouttootherchannelstogettheirstoriesout andtostayrelevant.âHeshrugs.âItmakessense,itjustsucksthatsheâstheonewhoâsinchargeofrunningthesportssocials
forthe Athletic Edge. â
Iâmstartingtogetit.âSo,shecanputmorethingsupaboutmethatarenegativeifshewantsto?â
âIf bythings youmeancontent, thenyes Anyone else I wouldnât questionthis, but her actions havenât beenlikened to journalisticintegrity,atleastnotlately.Sheâslovingthefactyougotintoafightwithateammate.âHeslideshisphonebackin hispocket âAndabelovedplayeratthatâ
âBeloved.âItrynottochokeonmycroissant.âSmokeandmirrors,thatguy.â
âOnethingatatime Letâsgetyousettledinandstartclearingyourhead,thengetyououttotherinksoyoucandowhatyou dobest.â
Pushingourchairsbackfromthetable,Istandup,awarethatafewmoreheadsarenowturningourway.ButIâmnotgoing toevenlookback;Ineedtolookforwardfromthismomenton YougetonechanceatacareerlikeIwant,andIcanâtmessup again.
FollowingTravisdownthestreet,IknowIneedtokeepmyeyesontheprize:whileIâmhere,Iwillstayfocusedandkeep mycareersteady.Thereâsalotridingonthisforme.
âSo,letme make sure Iâve gotthe details straight.Yougotina car witha stranger,orderedhimaround,and,surprise,it turns outheâs one ofyour brotherâs sports clients, and his bestfriend?â Georgie throws her headofthick,full,honeyblond hair backand laughs. Sheâs notonlyone ofmyabsolute bestfriends, butsheâs also the owner ofthe Pages and ProseBookshop,whereIworkrightnowinSweetkissCreek.âIâmgoneforoneday,andImissallthefun.Also,isnâtthathow horrormoviesstart?Shegetsintoacarwithastranger â
âMaybenexttimeyouâllthinktwicebeforetakingadayoff,âImanagetogrunt.Shecanteasemeallshewants;itâsnotlike IdidnâtchastisemyselfplentylastnightwhenIthoughtaboutthefactthatthewholepartwhereIgotintoacarwithastranger couldhavegoneverywrong.
âHey,look,âIsay,all nonchalantandstuffbecauseitâstimetochangethetopicofconversation âTheycaughttheperson whoâsbeenstealingunderwearoffofpeopleâsclotheslines.â
Georgiegasps,quitedramaticallyasabestfriendshouldwhenyourevealatidbitlikethat,andcomestostandbesideme. âNo!Whowasit?â
âMissPippy.âPointingtoaphotoonmyphone,Igiggle.âItâsacat.Seemssheâsbeenstealingthemanddraggingthemtoa hidingspotinherownerâsgarage Saysherethatherownerwaslookingforsomeoldpaintandfoundapileofpantiesâ
âCanyouimaginegoingintoyourgarageandfindingsomeweirdcollectionofrandomunderwear?âShegiggles,headingto thestoreroombehindthecounterandappearingamomentlaterwithanunopenedboxinherhand.âIwoulddieifIwasoneof thewomenwhohadtheirundiesstolen.â
âNotjustwomen,thiscathadnoboundaries.Shetookalltheundies.Atleastthekidswillprobablygettheirsback.â âWhydoyousaythat?â
âIdonâtknow aboutyou,butwhenIwas little,mymother insistedonwritingmyname inmyunderwear.â Lookingup,I findGeorgiestaringatmewithastrangeexpression âWhat?Didnâtyourmomwriteyournameinyours?â
âImean,ifweweregoingtocamporsomething,butnotjusttowriteournameinthem,âshesays,slicingopentheboxand pullingbackitsflaps,revealingalloftheprettynewbooksthathadbeendelivered.
âBut,now,youâvegotbiggerpantiestofill.âSheshovestheboxmyway.âAllyourstogetontotheshelves.â
Rollingmyeyes,Istartpullingoutdifferenttitles,liningthemupinorderofgenreonthecountersoIcanbealittlemore cohesive inmymovements WhenIstarted here parttime a few months ago, the firstthingIdid was to organize Georgieâs shelvessotheywerealittlemorestrategic.Notthatshedidnâthaveagoodsystem,butthingscanalwaysbeimproved.Ibroke downhershelfgroupingsbygenrefirst Then,whilealphabeticalisthewaymostfolksstockbooks,Ichangedthetopshelves sotheycontainstaffandbookclubpicks,thenbestsellers inthatgenre onthe nextshelfdown.The shelves below those are stockedalphabetically.Makesitmorefunforusbecausewegettotalkaboutourfavoritereadsandthelocal bookclubsget involved,too
WhenIbringthelastbookout,Itosstheboxbehindthecountertobreakdownlater,butasmallpackagefliesoutandlands ontheflooratGeorgieâsfeet
âLooks like youmissed this,â Georgie says, bendingover to inspectthe tinyparcel. She rips openthe paper. âIforgotI orderedthese!â
She scatters the brightly colored contents across the counter. The small pile of thread brightens the mood, both of us grinningasawaveofnostalgiahits.Friendshipbracelets.
âThesearesocute!âSwipingone,Iholditintheair,admiringit âIremembermakingthesewhenIwaslittle Rightaround thesametimemymomwasscribblingmynameinmyunderwear.â
Shelaughs âIgotthemonpurposeâ âYoudid?â
She hands me an orange one âThis is for you I picked orange because it means confidence, courage, and creativityâ Georgiesmiles,herlight-browneyesdancing.âIfigurewitheverythingyouâvegotonthehorizon,itwasprettyfitting.â âItâs perfect, thank you.â Slipping it on my wrist, I feel a buzz. Must be how Wonder Woman feels when she puts her
braceletson.
âMaybeyoucanshowthemtoJakethenexttimeyouseehim.âShelaughs.âAfteryouapologizeforbeingsobossy.â
âIamperfectbeingbossy,thankyouverymuchâIdonâtmentionthepartwhereIhavenâtstoppedthinkingaboutJakesince yesterday.Infact,Iâveworkedveryhardtopushhis six-foot-whatever hotness outofmymindfor now.Iâvebeendownthat road,anditâsano-go Notnow âAnyway,fromwhatTravismentioned,thisguyneedsabreak heâsgotenoughproblems He was suspendedfromplaybutthenwas letgofromhis team.Iremember Travis talkingabouthimwhenhesignedhimafew yearsago heâsgotatemper,oratleasthasbeenknowntobelikeaclosedbook Verystand-offish,whichIcanattesttonow HeâsherewhileTravisworksonanewcontractforhim.â
âThis suspensionthingsounds familiar.â Georgie alreadyhas her iPad outand is startingto playdetective. âWhatâs his name?â
âJakeDecember.âPointingtothedeviceclutchedinhergrasp,Ishakemyhead.âBut,donâtdothat.â âWhy?â
âIâdrathernotknow awholelotabouthim,atleastnotlikethat.Heâsmybrotherâsfriend,andifIdogettoknow him,I wanttogettoknowhimonmyownterms Notgooffwhatthepressorsomegossipblogssayâ
âUh-huh.âClearlynotlisteningtome,Georgieletsher fingersdothescrolling.Sheâsafanoficehockeyandhasbeena plus-one whenever Travis has invited me to games over the pastyear. SeeingGeorgie, this tinylittle waifwho looks like a bohemiangoddess,youâdneverthinkofherholdingabeerthatâssloshingallovertheplacewhileshescreamsatgrownmen fightingontheice.Itâsprettyhilariousactually.
Sheemitsalowwhistle,alertingmethatsheâsfoundsomethinginteresting âOh,wow Iknewhisnamesoundedfamiliar HeâsasuperstarwhoisexpectedtogoontonationalteamssoonâŚifhecangethisangerincheck.â
Get his anger in check and thatâs why I didnât want to know, âcause heâs still known as the angry guy. But now Iâm curious.
âWhatdoyoumean?â
âOnestorytalksabouthowanincidenthappenedinagamerecentlywhereheandhisteammategotintoafight,leadingto histen-daysuspension.Theotherguywasalsosuspended,butJakewasletgofromtheteampermanentlybecausetheargument apparentlyspilledofftheiceandintothelockerroomâShewincesasshecloseshereyes âLooksliketheowneroftheteam wasinthelockerroomatthetimeandheendedupgettingknockeddownbyJake.Thatâsprobablywhyhewasfired.â
Georgiekeepsreadingwhilemythoughtsswirl.Thesameguywhohadhislittledogwithhiminhistinycaryesterdaytook outateammateandtheowner?IâmstillunpackingwhenGeorgiedoesanotherdramaticgasp,butthisoneisnâtforshow. âYouâre goingto want to see this,â she mumbles, flickingher eyes to mine. She taps onthe screen. âHe played for the Bladesâ
Iwince.Iknowthatteam,onlyabittoowell.âAnd?â
âTheguyhegotintoafightwith ItâsToddâ âTodd.âIchokeonthenameasmyjawgoesslack.âAsintheToddwhoIdatedâŚthatTodd?â
Ipeekoverhershoulder,andsureenough,thereâsthestorywithToddâsfacefrontandcenternexttoaphotoofJake.My skinactuallycrawlswhenIseehim Trustme,thereâsnolovelostthere,atleastnotforme.
Shuddering,Itaponthescreenandscrolldownthepage,lookingforsomething âWhatareyoudoing?âGeorgieasks.
âLookingforanotherstory Anything,justnotthat Idonâtwanttoseethatâ âWell,itâllgiveyoutwosomethingtotalkabout,âshejokes,butIâmnotlaughing.
Todd is the kind of guy who swoops in and makes you feel really special. Does all the right things: invites you to Thanksgivingwithhimandhisfamily,fliesyoutoagameortwo,sendsyouflowersandmakessurethatthevaseisnotonly stuffedwithallofyourfavoriteblooms,butthatthecardisalsoonpoint.Theyalwayssaidthemostperfectthings. Inhindsight,Ishouldhaveknownhispersonalassistantwastheonewritingthosecards GeorgieputsanarmaroundmeandputsdowntheiPad.âSorry.Iknowhehurtyou.Hewasaterribleboyfriend.â âThatwordrightthere âBoyfriendâ ItâsnotatermIâdusetodescribewhatToddwastomeâ Georgienarrowshereyesasshewatchesme.âWhyâsthat?â
âWeneverreallylabeledwhatwewere,nordidwecall ourselvesboyfriendandgirlfriend.ItâsnotlikeIcansaymyex wasajerk HeâssomeoneIdatedwholeftoutthepartthathewasalsodatingafewotherpeopleatthesametimeâShrugging, Itrytocasuallybrushitoff.Butman,itstillstings.âSo,Icanâtreallycallhimaboyfriend.IthinkitâsfairtosayIâveneverhad one,Georgieâ
âHadonewhat?âsheasks,ponderingmywordsforamomentbeforehereyeswiden.âAboyfriend?â
I nod, feeling a warm flush spring to my cheeks along with a twist of discomfort, a tinge of anxiety, and a hint of anticipationall mixed together, creatinga sensationthatâs hard to ignore. It's as if myinsides are momentarilyout of sync, remindingmeofthevulnerabilityanduncertaintythatcomeswiththinkingaboutthis.
âThereâsneverbeensomeoneIâvebroughthometomyfamilyandintroducedasmyman,âIsay,pushingpastthefactIfeel completelyexposedandvulnerablerightnow.ButitâsGeorgie,soIknowIâmsafehere.âIâvedatedsomeguysandToddwas theclosestIhadgotten,notthatheâsawinner Westartedoutandwerecasualbutthenhetrickedmewhenheaskedmetogoto Thanksgivingwithhim,whichgavemeafeelingofinclusion.Sincerity,youknow?â
âIâmstill digestingthe factthatyouâre,what,twenty-eightyears oldandyouâve never hada real boyfriend?â She stands back,lookingatmewithadmirationdancinginhereyes.âYouâreahottie howhaveyoustayedoffthemarket?â
âThanks, but I just never tried, I guess I was busy in high school working for my family and, honestly, I couldnât be bothered.Iwashangingoutinthekitchenwatchingmydadcook.â
Rightthen,analarmgoesoffonmyphone.Glancingatthescreen,itâsmycalendarremindingmethatmydadâsprobably outsidewaitingtopickmeupsincemycarâsnotbackfromtheshopyet
âWeâll have to table this rivetingconversationfor another day,â Isayquickly, leaningover the counter and grabbingmy pursefromwhereitsitsonashelfunderneath âMyshiftisdoneandDadispickingmeup Ineedtogooverthedinnermenu withhimforthatprivatemealIâmdoing.â
âFineâGeorgiecutshereyesmyway,waggingafinger âThistopicisnotoffthetable Yet OperationBoyfriendneedsa planningsession.â
âNo,itreallydoesnât,âIsaywithalaugh,swingingopenthefrontdoorandturningaroundasIhitthestreettolookather onelasttime âAtleastnothere Imean,wheredoyoufindaguyinasmalltownlikeSweetkissCreek?â
Georgiestickshertongueoutatme,butasecondlater,hereyeslightup.
âWell,onejustdroverightintoyourpath â
Istopthedoorasitâsabouttoslamclosedwithmyfoot.Kickingitbackopen,Inarrowmyeyesandpointafingerherway. âNo.Nomorehockeyplayers.â
âWhynot?âSheisapetulantchild.âYoucanâtsayyouârescaredofcommitment.Youhaveaturtle.â
âIhaveaturtlebecauseitâslowcommitment.âAndBradPittisverycool.
âDoyouknowhowlongturtleslivefor?âShethrowsherhandsintheair âTheyarethedefinitionofcommitmentâ Hearingthewordsendsachillacrossmyflesh.Ifake-gagandrollmyeyes.âNo.Nocommitmentandnodating.â GeorgieopenshermouthandIholdupahandtostopher âAndno Notevenonecoffeetogetmyfeetwet Iâvehadmyfeet wetandwashitbyatsunami.Nothankyou.â
âIdonâtgetit,âGeorgiesayswithasigh,tossingapaperbagatmyhead.âYouârewastingyourbestyearsonaturtle.â
âIâmonhiatusbecauseofTodd.AndnomorehockeyplayersbecauseI,likeyou,enjoythegameandIdonâtneeditruined formeagain.âShakingmyhead,Istareather.âLeaveitalone,okay?Iappreciatethesentiment,butmytimewillcomewhen itâssupposedtoâ
Disappointmentwashesoverherfeatures,butIstaystrong.Thisismylovelifeweâretalkingabout.Orlackofone. âFine Butââ
âNobuts.âWavingahandintheairIspinaroundandgo.âBye.â
Scanningthestreet,Ifindmydadâscarprettyeasily.Heâsdrivenhisbaby,aâ66FordMustangconvertible.AsImakemy waytowardit,IsayasilentprayerthatGeorgiewillforgetaboutourconversationfornowandjustletmebe
IneverevenreallybrokeupwithTodd;thatâshowseriousitendedupbeingintheend,oratleastforhim.Ifoundouthe wasdatingsomeoneelsewhenitshoweduponagossipwebsite Itwasagorgeousphototakenofhimonenightwhenhewas outwith,accordingtothecaption,hisgirlfriend.Iknowthatthepresswillgetaphotoofacelebrityandthentrytomakemore ofitthanwhatitseems,butthistimewasdifferent
Different because heâd told me he was home sick. Different because heâd sworn to me there wasnât anyone else even thoughtherewererumors.DifferentbecauseIâdemotionallyletmyheartgetattachedtohim.Ibelievedhim.Trustedhim.And helied
Sighing,Iholdmyshouldersupandsquarethemoff.Ipromisedmyselfafterthatphotoandthesubsequentcuttinghimout ofmylifethatIwasnâtgoingtogetsuckedinlikethatagain
So,sorry,JakeDecember.ThatiswhyIwonâtdateicehockeyplayers.ThankyouforcomingtomyTEDTalk.
âAndthatâsthemenu?â
Anglingmyselfinthepassenger seattofacemydad,Ifighttonotscrew upmyface âThatâs all youcansay?Iâm startingwithawildmushroomsalad,foragedfromlocalsources,andapotatoflandrizzledwithtrufflecream.Iâlldoa scoopofsherbettocleansethepalette,beforethemaincoursetrufflemadness,withasprinklingofchicken,begins.â
âSprinklingofchicken Isthatathingnow?âHewinksatme,leaningovertosqueezemyarmasheturnsdownthefamiliar streettoourhouse.âJustkidding,sweetie.Itsoundsperfect.IthinkworkingwiththePorterfamilyandusingtheirtrufflesand mushrooms is a great way to collaborate with local businesses, too Are all of the ingredients youâre using coming from producersinthearea?â
âTheysureareâIsmile,knowingheapproves Iwantmymomtolikeit,too,butDadâstheoneIlearnedfromgrowingup Iusedtolovehangingwithhiminthekitchenandhelpinghimcook.
Mydadhasalwaysbeenthekindofdadthatotherfriendsofourswerejealousabout.Donâtgetmewrong,mymomwas prettywell-liked,too,butDadalwaysmadelifefun AndnotjustâLetâsgogeticecreamâkindoffun,butfunlikeâYoukids wantaslipslide?Givemetenminutes.âAnd,sureenough,tenminuteslater,heâdtakeustothebackyardwherehewouldhave setupalineoftorn-uptrashbagswithourwaterhosesprayingacrossit,laughing Itwasnâtawaterpark,butitwasprettygenius.
âSo,âhesays,pullingintothedrivewayofour house our familyhouse,notmyhouseanymoresinceImovedoutafew weeksagoandgotmyownplace.However,tobefair,IâllprobablycomebackandstealsomegroceriessometimesbecauseI likekeepingmymomonher toes.âDoyouhaveanyideawhenyour car isgoingtobefixed,or doIneedtobeontaxi duty tomorrow,too?â
âDubstextedmeandsaidthattheradiatorwasleaking.Luckily,itdidnâtdamageanyhosessoitâsaneasyfix.Itâllbeready bytomorrowâTurningintoourdriveway,heslowsthecartoahaltandIseemybrotherâscarinthedriveway âIsTravishere fordinnertonight?â
âHegetsbackontheroadsoon,âDadsays,openinghisdoorandhoppingout.âRaceyainside?â
Laughing,Itrailbehindhim.Theoldguyisalwaystryingtostayactive;Ijustprayhedoesnâttriprunningupthesteps. Followinghimintheopenfrontdoor,afeelingoflovehitsmyheartandasenseofcomfortwashesoverme.Thefamiliar scent ofhome a blend offreshlybaked cookies, hints ofvanilla, and the earthyaroma ofmymotherâs favorite candles greetsmewarmly,wrappingmeinacocoonofloveandfamiliarity.
Steppinginside,Iâmgreetedbythesoftglow ofwarmlightingandthegentlehumoffamilyactivity Thelivingroomisa sanctuary of coziness, with plush sofas adorned with colorful throw pillows, inviting me to sink into their embrace. Photographsofcherishedmemorieslinethewalls,eachoneatestamenttothebondsharedbythosewhoinhabitthisspace.
As I navigate mywaythroughthe livingroom, I canhear Travisâs voice It sounds like heâs outside, so I peekout the windowtoourbackdeck.Sureenough,heâsthereleaningagainsttheporchrailyammeringawayonhisphone.
Islide the patio door openand step onto the deck, wavingto himas Ido His face is super serious his âIâmworking faceâ soIknow toleavehimalone.Myhandfliestomyforehead,strokingthespotwhereIâvebeenknowntowrinklemy nosewhenIâminseriousmode MomlikestoremindmeifIdoittoomuch,IâllendupneedingBotox
ThedoortothehouseopensbehindmeandDadstepsoutsidejustasTravishangsuphiscall.Hewaveshisphoneinthe air.
âThatwasthetoughestcallIâvehadtodayâHerollshiseyes,andDadclickshistongueontheroofofhismouth âAclient?âDadasksknowingly.
âItwasMom,âTravissayswithashudder,makinguslaugh âWhatdoesshewant?â
âVolunteers,âDadsaysasheputsabeerinTravisâshandandcracksoneopenforhimself âYourmotheristryingtohelp getacharityeventorganizedforthelocalbrothersandsistersgroup.â
âLikeBigBrothersBigSisters?âLaughing,Isitbackandsizemybrotherup.âIfheneedsreferences,IfeellikeIâllneedto
stepinandletpeopleknowasmybigbrother,heusedtothreatentositonmyheadandfart.â
âHar,har.âTravissnorts,throwingapillowatmyhead.âIâllhaveyouknow,IâdbeagreatBigBrother.â
âAgain,asyourlittlesister,letmebethejudgeofthisâMyturntosnortasIplopdownononeoftheAdirondackchairs besidemydad.BestviewoftheactualSweetkissCreekisrighthere,fromourbackyard.
Sweetkiss Creekglistens under the soft hues ofthe settingsun, its waters flowinggentlylike liquid gold, reflectingthe colors ofthe skyabove. Itâs a beautiful springevening, and the air is filled withthe sweetscentofblossomingflowers and freshlycutgrass
Itake inthe breathtakingview witha sense ofawe and gratitude. The creekmeanders lazilythroughthe lushlandscape, flankedbytoweringtreesadornedwithvibrantgreenleavesthatswaygentlyintheeveningbreeze.Theirbranchesreachout likewelcomingarms,castingdappledshadowsonthewaterbelow
Birdsongfillstheair,asymphonyofchirpsandtrillsthatseemstoharmonizewiththegentlebabblingofthecreek.Iclose myeyesforamoment,allowingthesoothingsoundstowashoverme,groundingmeinthepresentmoment
Inthedistance,isthesilhouetteoftheoldcoveredbridge,itsweatheredwoodenplanksatimelesssymbol ofourtownâs richhistory Itstandsasasilentsentinel,watchingoverSweetkissCreekwithquietreverence Iloveithere.
âIâll have you know that in high school,â Travis interjects, interrupting my solitude, âI was known as the most giving studentwhenIgraduatedâ
âIdonâtthinkthatwasanawardtheyhandedout.âSnappingmyfingers,Isitupalittletaller.âConsideringthefactIstill havethatyearbook,Icanseeifthatisfactuallycorrectâ
Travisnarrowshiseyes.âYouwouldn'tdare.â
Shrugging,Ihopupandheadinside.âOh,yesIwould.â
IâvenosoonerclosedtheglassdoorbehindmewhenIhearTraviscallmynameagain.Sureheâsgoingtotellmenottoget theyearbook,Iwaveahandovermyshoulderandignorehim.Iwalkovertothebookshelfinthelivingroom,thelastplaceI rememberitbeing
Scanningtheshelves,Iseealotofothermemoriesintheformofphotosandtrinkets:thetinyBigBenandphotosofusasa familyunitinfrontofthepalacefromour familytriptoLondon,abookonseaturtlesfromour adventuresintheCaribbean, some photos fromthe Christmas we spent inFlorida. That was the trip we agreed weâd never not be home for Christmas againâŚnotthatwedidnâtlikeFlorida,butwelikeasnowy,coldChristmas,otherwise,itjustdoesnâtfeelright.
Scratchingmyhead,literally,Irealizethattheyearbookisprobablyinmyoldbedroom.Iâdonlyvacateditafewmonths ago,butIknewMomhadsomebigplansforitonceIwasout.Ihitthestairsandtakethemtwoatatimetothesecondfloor, unsureofwhatstatemyroomwillbeinonceIgetthere
Ithrowthedooropenandimmediatelyjumpback.There,onmyoldbedglaringatmeisasmallfamiliardog,eyeslaced withjudgment AsIopenthedoorwider,itgrowls
âOkayâŚâLookingaround,Irealizemyroomfeelsweird,thenIseethepileofclothesinthecorner.Lookingbackatthe dog,IknowweâvemetalreadyinacertainroguerideItookpartinjustadayago.
Whenmyeyeslandonasuitcaseinthecornerthatâsflippedwideopen,alittlerushofheatfloodsmysystem
Takingastepbackward,Ikeepmyeyesonthesmallbeastcheckingmeoutandstarttoturnaround.OnlywhenIdo,Iwalk face-firstandslamchest-to-chestintoagiantwall AwallthatlooksverysimilartoJakeDecember
Caughtoffguard,Istarttotumbleback,fallingintotheroom.Myhandflailsintheair,grabbingatanythingtosteadyme, graspingontoJakeâsarmsandwrappingmyhandstightlyaroundhisbicepshopinghecanbreakmyfall
Luckyforme,thismanislikeasuperheroandactsinaflash.Hisotherarmcomesaroundtoscoopmefrombehindashe plantshisstancefirmlyandcatchesmeinhisarms.Iâmprettysuretothenormalpasserbyitwouldlooklikeacoupletryingto dance,heattemptingtodipmeandlookinggracefulintheprocess,butIâmforsurethisloosepieceofspaghettidanglingfrom hishands.
Takinga giantbreath, Itryto hide myembarrassment and notmake eye contact, onlyto realize that the manâs arms are coveredintattoos.Like,notthekindthataretoomuch,butafew tattoos hereandthereplacedinthebestplaces.Skimming them,Iwanttoreachoutandtouchone,stoppingjustshortofdoingsoasseveralthoughtsmaketheirwaythroughmymindat onetime.
OnebeingthatheâsjustcaughtmeandIshouldreallystandup.Theother,thatifIcanseehistattoos,thenthatmeanshe isnât wearinga shirt The smoothness ofhis skinfeels nice under the palmofmyhand, his muscles firm, and Irealize Iâm subconsciouslystrokinghisbicep.
âWhatthe ,âImanagetoblurtasItrytostandup
âHere.âJakesteadiesmeandtakesastepback,asmiledrapedacrossthosebeautifullipsofhis.Iwanttosmackmyself. Iâvemanagedtocheckouthislipsandfindthembeautiful.Andfeeluphisarmsallinoneminute.
ThenIletmyeyes do the walking. The manis standinginfrontofme inall ofhis glorywithone ofmyparentsâtowels drapedlooselyaroundhiships.
Heâswearingonlyatowel. ONLYATOWEL.
âYouokay?âHiseyesarefullofconcern,hisvoicehusky Isuddenlylikehusky Alot âAh,yes.âIsmoothdownmyhairandstraightenmyshirt,myeyesdartingaroundmyoldbedroomandthentohimagain. âSorry Ihadnoideayouwereevenhere,muchlessinmyoldroomâ
Heliftsashoulderandletsitdrop.âPipeburstatthebed-and-breakfastsotheyhadtocancelalloftheirreservations.Your parentsofferedâHiseyesscanmyroom,andIthinkthereâsactualdelightreflectedbackatme âHowcouldIsayno?â Iturnandtakeinmyoldspace.Thewallsarepaintedinsoft,earthytones,creatingawarmandinvitingbackdropforthe roomâsdecor.Tapestriesadornedwithintricatepatternshangfromtheceiling,addingatouchofbohemianflairandservingas focalpointsforthespace Dreamcatchersswaygentlyinthebreeze,theirdelicatefeathersandbeadscastingplayfulshadows onthewalls.
Alarge,cozybedtakescenterstage,drapedinlayersofcolorfulquiltsandthrows,butallforsurevibingonthecolorpink Pillowsofvariousshapesandsizesarescatteredacrossthebed,includingsomeofmyoldstuffedanimalsfromwhenIwas little Acanopyofsheerfabrichangsabove,addingatouchofromancetothespace
Chewingonagrin,IlookbackatJakeandpursemylips.âHopeyoulikepink.â
âItâs never done anythingto me.â Asmile dangles onthose lips like a pair ofstrappyheels. And whyitmakes myheart skip,Iwillneverknow
PointingtoastuffedWinniethePooh,Igivehimmymostseriousexpression.âHeâdbetternotgettornapartbyyourbeast, capiche?â
âIsitweird?âheasks,grinning.âAreyoualittlefreakedoutthatsomeonewhoisnâtyouisinyourspace?â
âMyoldspace,âIsay,correctinghim.âSoessentially,youâredealingwithmyleftovers.Anditâsonlygoingtobeweirdif youhappentoknowwheremyhighschoolyearbookis.â
Heshakeshishead.âCanâthelpyouthere.â
Glancingathim,Iseeasmallbeadofwaterbeginajourneydownthesideofhisface,tohisneckwhereitjumpsshipand headsdownthedipsandcurvesofhismuscularframetopartsunknown.Shakingmyhead,Igivemyselfaninternalslapacross theface
âSo,youâreinSweetkissCreek,âImanaged,pushingaheadandtryingnottolookathisabsolutelyamazing,hunky,bulky manchestandtheaccompanyingmuscleparts.âIsitabreakforyouorpunishment?â
âIcanletyouknowaftermystay,butyourparentshavebeenreallygoodtomesofar.âHenodstohisdog.âPosh,too.â IstealaglanceatPoshwhosits,eyesarelockedonherman.Sheâslookingquiteadorablewhenshesuddenlyrollsover ontohersideandcloseshereyes Shesticksherfeetoutstraightasaboardandappearstostopbreathing
Leapingforward,Ihitthebedtopickherup.Iloveanimals,andevenifthisonehasnâtdecidedifshelikesmeornotyet,I canâtstandbywhileshehasaseizureoraheartattack
âIssheokay?âIask,scoopingherintomyarmsandturningaroundtofaceJake,whoisunfazedbythewholething.
âSheâsdramatic.âHerollshiseyes.âShedoesthatwhenshewantsattention.Shelikesplayingdead.â
Ilookdownatthecunningcreatureinmyarmswhois,mostcertainly,stillbreathing,andIswearIthinkislaughingatme I canfeelherlittlebodyloosenupassherelaxesintomyarms.Hereyesopenandshebeginstoslowlylickthebackofmyhand, hereyesmovingbetweenustwohumansintheroomwithher
âWow,thatâsAcademyAwardstuffrightthere.âBendingover,Iputherbackonthebedwhereshetakesupherthroneof judgmentoncemore
âSheâsabitmuch,butIwouldnâttradeherforanotherdog.Ever.â
âHowareyousureshefeelsthesameway?â
âBecauseshetellsmeâ âFunny.â
âNo,shedoesâClutchinghistowelsecurelyaroundhiswaist,JakewalksoverandstandsinfrontofPosh,bendingoverto kiss her head. Whichmakes somethinginside ofme shift, a movementIcanonlycompare to somethinglike a tectonic plate liningitselfupbeforeabigearthquake
Aman.Inatowel.Kissinghissmalldog.Ithinkmyovariesjustshuddered.Bestpartis,heâsnotdone. JakestandsuptallandlooksdownatPosh,cockinghisheadtooneside.âIloveyou,babygirl.â
Inanactoffull-on,all-outridiculouscuteness,Poshjumpstoherfeet Shemimicshishead,cockingherstoonesidewhile a high-pitchedsoundcomes outofher body.Itâs nota barkor a growl,more like a babytryingtosaythe words.Ithinkitâs whatdolphinssoundlikewhentheyaredoingtheirthing,itâsthatoutofmyrealmandsoforeign,yetitâsalsosoamazing
Whensheâsdone,Jaketurnsaroundtofaceme,asmirkonhisface.Hegivesalittlenodanddoesaquickbowatthewaist. âAndthatishowyougetyourdogtotalktoyou.â
âOkay,well,thatisexceptional.âThereâsaweirdflutterinsidemeasIholduptheyearbookandwaveitintheair.âMy missionisaccomplished.Iâmwantedonthedeck.â
Jakelooksdownatthetowel,andofcourse,myeyesgowithhis.No,no,no.
âIshouldgetchanged,âhesays,inclininghisheadtowardtheroombehindme.âAndlook,Iâmsorryabouttheotherday.I shouldhavesaidsomething,but â
âItâs fine.âIwaveitofflikeIâmchill rightnow.Sochill.Andnotfreakingoutinsidethatthis manis actuallyextremely coolandseemstohaveawickedsenseofhumor AndhehasabsIswearIcouldbounceaquarteroff Myeyeskeeptryingto looktheirway,butIâmfightingagoodfighthereandworkingreallyhardsotheywonâtgooffontheirownanddowhatthey want Stupideyes
Yet,thosebigbrowneyesofhis pull mein,likeafishthatâsbeenhookedonaline.Herunshisfingersthroughhis hair. âMaybeIâllseeyouagain?â
Theactual thoughtofseeinghimagainsendsawildthrill throughmysemi-irritatedsystem Ireallyhavenoreasontobe irritatedatthispoint,infact,Ifeellikeaskingwhyhegotintosuchahugefightwithmyex.
Look,Iâmnota girl thatis gonna condone fighting,butevenIknow thatinhockeysometimes itâs necessary Andalsoin affairsoftheheart,sothefactthatheisthemanwhofoughtsomeonewhowassohorribletomemakesJakemoreintriguing. DoIwanttodoadeepdiveofmyownandgohomeandletmyfingersdotheGoogling?Youbet
And the flutter thatis currentlyflittingaboutmytummyisnâthelpingme. Notone bit. NotwhenIcanâtstop lookinginto thosedarkbrowneyesofhisandwonderwhytheylooksosad.Theurgetoreachoutandtouchhisarmisback,andittakesall Ihave inside me to notsmackthatarmwiththe other one Iâve beenaround this manonlya couple oftimes now, and heâs turningmyradarupsidedown.Oh,exceptforthepartwherethereisthisfeelingofahookinmyverycoreanditâstuggingme intohim
ThisinternalbattleIâmhavingcanonlymeanonething.
But.No.
No, no, no!Thereâsalittlevoiceinsidemyheadthatstartstogetveryloud.Like,superloud.
NO MORE HOCKEYPLAYERS, RILEY!itscreams.
Ishouldlistentoit
âYeah,maybe.âSwallowing,Istepbackward,smackingintothedoorjamb.Cursinghissorceryundermybreath,myeyes findhimandthereâslaughterdancingbehindthem Iâmnotsmoothatthebestoftimes,soIamwellawareIâmnotmakingany kindofgracefulimpressionsnow.
Despitehisbesthypnoticefforts,IfinallypullmyeyesfromthetractorbeamthatisJake.Takingasteptotheright,Iallbut fallintothehallwayandbreakfreeoftheroom.
AsIheadbackdownthestairs,quickly,mymindisalreadyturningitsgears,wonderingwhy.WhyamIfeelinglikeagirl inhighschool withacrush?Whyismyheartslamminginmychest?Besidesthepartwherehewaswearingonlyatowel,it wasjustarun-inwithsomeguywhohappenstobestayinginmyoldbedroom.Butalso,whycareaboutseeinghimagain?I donâtneedtoand,infact,itâsprobablybetterthatIsteerclearofmyparentsâhouseuntilheâsgone Jakeisonlyhereforalittlebitlonger.Whatâsthesaying,hereforagoodtimeandnotalongoneâŚ? Right?
Steppingonto the ice rinkearlyinthe morning, before the sunhas fullyrisen, thereâs a stillness thatenvelops the entire arena Theonlysoundisthefainthumoftheiceresurfacerasitglidesacrossthesurface,smoothingoutanyimperfections leftfromthepreviousdayâsactivities.Theairiscrispandcold,tingedwiththepromiseofabrand-newday.
Iâve always liked this time ofdayto be ona rink. The ice stretches outbefore me, pristine and untouched, like a blank canvas waitingto be painted Itâs a moment of quiet solitude, a rare opportunityfor reflectionbefore the chaos of the day begins.
Itake a deepbreath,the chill ofthe air fillingmylungs as Iskate outontothe ice The blades ofmyskates bite intothe surface witha satisfyingcrunch, sendinga shiver ofanticipationdownmyspine. This is mysanctuary, myhome awayfrom home,wheretheworldfadesawayandit'sjustmeandtheice
AsIglideeffortlesslyacrosstherink,Icanâthelpbutfeelasenseofpeacewashoverme.Therhythmicsoundofmyskates cuttingthroughtheiceislikemusictomyears,afamiliarmelodythatsoothesmysoul.Thisismyplayground.Itâsdefinitely notasbigastheoneweusefortheRenegades,butitâsperfectforwhatIneedrightnow
Ilovethefeelingthatrushesthroughmeassoonasmybladeshittheice;IamincontrolandfeellikeIhaveasuperpower thatnoonecantakeawayfromme
Travissaidheâdcalledaheadandarrangedforsomeonetosetuptheiceformetodaytogivemeagoodrunatsomedrills Iâmusedtodoing.WhenIarrived,oneoftheguyswhorunstheconcessionstandhadplacedsmallblackcircularobjectsthat looklikeridinglawnmowertiresinstrategicplacesaroundtheice.NotwhatIâmusedto,butitworks.
ItossapuckinfrontofmeasIstepontotheiceandstartthefirstofmydrills doingtightturnsaroundthosetiresforpuck protection Theambientnoiseoftheairconditioning,theglideofthebladesofmyskatesontheice,toppedoffwiththesound ofthepuckasmysticktapsiteveryfewsecondsreleasesanytensionIâvebeenholdinginmyshoulders.
Istayworkingonthismoveforanotherfewminutesbeforeflowingintopivotpractice,usingmybodytoprovidecoverand pivotwhilemakingsurethepuckisprotected.Mydadpopsintomythoughtsagain;heâsnothaditeasyforthelastfewyears, butIâmproudofthemanhewants tobe.Oneoftheperks ofplayingfor ateamis thesteadypaycheck,andTravis has been goodabouthandlingmynegotiationssoIgetfairpay,andithelpsmetotakecareofmydad,too.
Imoveontoinside-outpivotsnow,andthedrillsgetmorecomplex kindoflikethatfather-sonrelationship.Justthinking aboutthelasttimeIsawhim,Icanfeelmyenergygetmorechaotic,frenetic,andIknowIneedtoworkonthis Icanâtletmy worryforhimsparkaninternalragethatstartstoshow;itâlljustmakepeoplethinktheyârerightaboutme.
ItâsnotthatIâmangryatmypops,itâsthatIâmangryatthesituation MymotherdiedwhenIwaslittle,soitwashimdoing the besthe could for us, and ona meager restaurantmanagerâs salary. WhenIwanted to startplayingice hockey, he tooka secondjobontheweekendsworkingasawaiterforanearlybreakfastshiftsoheâdmakeenoughmoneytopayformygear.
Wedidnâthavealot,buthealwaysmadesurewewereneverlacking Healwaysputmefirst,andIâllberepayinghimfor thatfortherestofourlives.
Istayfocusedandworkonmoredrills,comingoutofmylittleworldofsolacewhenInoticemorepeopleareinthearena now.Slowingdown,Istopneartheedgetocatchmybreathandlookaround.
âUm,excuseme,âsomeonecallsout,âbutIthinkmysonâsteamneedstheicenowâ
Spinningaround,Ifindatallwomanwithblondhairpiledhighontopofherheadandsunglassespushedbackwatchingme withasparkleinhereyeassheleansagainstthebalustrade.AlittleknockinmyguttellsmeIâveseenthatlookbefore,butIâm goingtogiveherthebenefitofthedoubt
âOh?âIskateovertoastopjustbeyondwheresheâsstanding.AsIdo,shemakessureIseeasshegivesalook,sweeping hereyesuponesideofmybodyandrightbackdowntheother âIthinkIhaveituntiltenâ
âItâsnine-fiftynow,soâŚâShetapsherwristandwinksatme.WhenIlookcloser,sheâsnotevenwearingawatch. âGotchaâ Skatingbackward, Istartpickingup the tinytires and bringingthemover to the side ofthe rink, tossingthem overthebalustradetogetthemofftheice.
âIâdhelpyouifIcould,âsheallbutpurrs.WhenIlookherway,shemakesalittleshowoutoftakingherhairoutofitsbun
andshakesherheadlikesheâsashampoomodel,thenletsithangloosearoundherface.Sheâsabeautifulwoman,buttheway sheâsjustangledherbodyatmeandtheexpressionshewearstellsmesheâsoneofâthoseâfans.
Fortherecord,Ilovemyfans;Iâvegotsomeamazingfolkswhosupportme,butthereâsasmallpercentagewhodothings likesendmetheirundergarmentsinthemailorshowupatgamesinmyjerseyandtrytobreakintothelockerroomsotheycan meetme BothofthesearetruestoriesandnoteventsIâdliketorepeat
âItâstotallyfine,âImumble,tryingnottomakeeyecontactlikeyouâresupposedtodowithbears.Isawadocumentaryon blackbearsonce,whichsaidifyouâreinthewildandyouseeone,donotmakeeyecontactbecausetheyseeitasachallenge Ofcourse,mymindstoredthatveryvaluablepieceofinformationawayformynextoutingaroundbears.
IskateovertotheexitandcomeofftheicetogetmyphonesoIcancallforaride,andshefollowsme.Great.Icanseemy futurenow:foratleastthenextthirtyminutes,Iâllbehidingoutinthelockerroomuntilmyridegetshere
âYoumustbenewintown,âshesays,sidesteppingasmallgangofkidswhoarehorsingaroundastheypullontheirgear. âIâmMandy Mysonplaysinthejuniorleagueâ
âThatâsnice,Ihopehelikesit.âIcanbekindandprofessionalwhilemovingataswiftpace,butsheâskeepingup. âHecouldusesomeprivatelessons Knowanyonewhomaybeabletohelp?â âMandy, Icanthinkofabouttenguys who could help youout,â a familiar voice calls out. âInfact, one ofthemis your husband.Isnâthethecoachofyoursonâsteam?â
WhenIlooktowardthevoice,awarmthfloodsmyveinsandmystomachdips Saiddipisfollowedbyatinglingfeeling thatrollsrightacrossmybody.
Canâtlie itâsprettyinterestingtowatchMandyâseyesnarrowasshesetshersightsonRiley âHi,Riley,âshesayswithvenomdrippingfromeachword.âNicetoseeyou.â
âSure itis.â Rileylaughs.She shifts her weightfromone foottothe other tobalance outthe giantbrownboxsheâs busy balancing.âHowarethingsgoingwithplanningforthefundraiser?â
âGood,âshesays,flickingherhandtowardme.âInfact,Ihadanideatoaskthissuperstarifheâdbesokindastodonate somethingtotheeventâ
Rileyâseyesmeetmineandshemakesafaceassherollsthem.Itâslikesheâsreadingmymind.
âWell,runitpastmymomfirst,okay? Webothknow how muchofa control freakshe canbe She likes handlingall the requestsforitemstobedonatedforanyeventshedoes,soIâmsuresheâllwanttohandlethisonewithJakeaswell.â
Mandypursesherlipstightly,hergazeswingingbackandforthbetweenRileyandmeuntilshebusiesherselfpullingher hairbackupintoapileontopofherhead.
âThanksforthetip,Riley,âshegrowlsasshewalksoff,turningaroundonelasttimetosmirkinmydirection.âAndIâllsee youaroundâ
Webothwatchherwalkaway,joiningasmallcrowdofparentsontheothersideoftherinkastheysettleintowatchtheir kidspractice WhenIturntoRiley,sheâschewinghercheek âYouthinkitâsfunny?â
âSheâsalwaysbeenanightmare.Shedriveseveryonecrazy.âRileystandswithherhandonherhip,headtiltedtotheside, andisonehundredpercentsizingmeuprightnow âHaveyoueverseenDirty Dancing?â âIhave.â
âWell,doyourememberthewomanwhoJohnnywouldgivedancinglessonsto,theonewhosehusbandneverpaidherany attention?ShewassleepingwithJohnnyandIthinksomeoftheotheremployeesatthesummerlodgethingtheywerestaying atâ
âIthinkwesawherleavethecabinoftheguywhogothersisterpregnant,right?â Rileyâseyeswidenandshestepsback,noddingwithapproval.âOkay,youknowyourmovietrivia.â
âItâs Dirty Dancing,âIsaywithawink âItâslikeaprerequisitetowatchwhenyouâreateenagerâ
Shegigglesanditmakesmesmilewider.âWell,thatâsher.Shedoesmeanwell,butsheâsperpetuallyinheat.â
Ahotflushmakesitswayacrossmycheeks âOkay,then Notedâ
Shelooksaroundthearena,scanningthegroupsofpeoplewhoaremillingaboutbeforehereyeslandonmeagain.âJust tryingtobehelpfulâ
âWell,âItease,standingup.Iholdmyhandsouttomyside.âIfyouâreherehopingtocatcharide,Iâmclosedtoday.Youâll havetocallacab.â
âYouknow,youâretheonewholetastrangerinastrangetowngetinyourcarâSherollshereyes âAndIthoughtweâve movedpastthat.â
âYourargumentmaybefactuallycorrect,butalsomakesnosenseâWaggingafinger,Istepclosertoher,gettingawhiffof gardeniaandlilies,whichIknowain'tme.âBycallingasharedride,usinganapp,youaretakingariskbecausehowdoyou knowwhosecaryouâregettinginto?Youcould,IdonâtknowâŚhopintothewrongcarbymistake?â
Iknowmypointismadebytheflushofpinkspreadingacrosshercheeks.
âWhatever.â She holds up her boxinthe air and starts backingaway. âIneed to drop this offand go. Do youneed my
securityservicesanylonger?â
âNo,butIâdlovetoknowwhatyouâvegotinthatbox.â
âCroissantsâAshysmileflitsacrossherlips âYouâreabaker?â
âIjusthappentomakeacroissantthatthelocalswouldkillfor,orsoIâvebeentold,âshesayswithagiggle âIâmdoingit tohelppaythebillswhileIgetmycateringbusinessofftheground.â
Ireachtowardthebox,butshemovesherbodysoitâsoutofreach âSorry,butyouâllhavetopayforoneattheconcession standlikeeveryoneelse.â
âFine.âIsitdownandstarttakingoffmyskates.âIâlldothat.â
âGood Well,youdowhatyouneedandIâllgobacktowork Seeyouaround,December,âshesaysoverhershoulderas sheheadsovertothestand.
Once myskates are off, Imake mywayto the locker roomto change, comingbackouta few minutes later onlyto find someoneâswaitingformeatthelockerroomdoor.
âHey,there,âMandysays,placingahandonmyarmtostopme âYouknow,Iwasserious Aboutthelessonsâ
Anervousheatflowsthroughme.Itâsonethingwhenasinglefandoesthistoyou,butnowthatIknowsheâsmarriedwith kidsandbothherhusbandandsonarehere,Ijustfeelicky.
âSorry, Idonâtdo lessons,â Isay, pushingpasther Glancingaround, myeyes land onRiley, who is still standingatthe counter talkingtooneoftheguys whoworks here.Istill havemyiPhoneclutchedinmyhandtocall her dadfor aride,but judgingthepredatorywayIâmbeingstalked,Ineedtogetoutofherenow
âIâllmakeitworthyourwhile,âMandysays,hervoicelower.âTheyâdbeformysonandforme,too.â
Weâregettingclosertothestand,andIcanâtmovefastenough.Itfeelsliketimeisstandingstillandnotinagoodway.I wanttogetfarawayfromthisandfast.
âSorry,Mandy,Icanât.IneedtoâŚRiley!âIcalloutasIjogtowardRiley,whoturnsatwhatIassumeisthesoundofher name IthrowmyhandintheairandwaveasIgetcloser
Iâmgoing to the sidebar here to let you know Iâma very smooth man when Iâmon the ice. I can skate like nobodyâs business,likeafishtowater Meandmyskates Graceful Buttoday,meandwalking?Weârefailingtocommunicate
Something happens as I get closer to Riley. My feet stop talking with my brain, or vice versa. All I know is that they suddenlytripup,andinaclassiccaseofMurphyâsLaw,Iâmabouttobiteit.
Iâmabigguy,soIknowifIgodown,itâsgoingtohurt.ButifIgodownandtakesomeoneoutwithme,Icouldalsohurt them.All ofthisracesthroughmymindasIfindmyselfblindlyreachingout,swipingandaccidentallygrabbingRiley.Sheâs nowbeenpulledintomytornadoandisalongfortheridewhethershelikesitornot
Inoneswiftandsmooth ifIdosaysomyself move,ImanagetodeftlyturnmyselfaroundinmidairasIâmfallingtothe groundsoIcanplacemyselfsquarelybetweenherandtheconcretefloor
Onegiantthudlater,andweâreatangledmessoflimbs.Icanâtseeanything,butIfeelherweightontopofmybody,and herhairisinmymouth.Shesmellslikeflowersandlime,withahintofhappinessandsunshine.Icanfeelthewarmthofher bodyagainstmineanditfeelslikeasoftblanketonacoldday Perfection
IsitweirdIwanttosavorthismomentforjustahotsecondbeforeitends?
As sherolls over,her eyes wide,Rileyshakes her head âIfyouneededtogetmyattention,youcouldhavejustsaidmy name,Twinkletoes.â
âIdohaveafavorIwantedtoaskâ
Eyesfulloflaughterfindmine.âMoresecurity?â âCanIgetaride?â
Being in the same room as Jake December can be one thing, especially now that Iâve seen him, his tattoos, and his ridiculouslydeliciousmusclesinallofthebestplaceswrappedlikeaChristmaspresentinafluffytowel
Butbeinginasmall spacelikethefrontseatofacar withhim?Well,thatâsawholeother storyaltogether.Atleast nowthatIknowhimitis.
IâmshockedatmyownactionswhenIrealizeIâmsneakingsidewaysglancesathimasIdriveusalongbackroadstomy parentsâhouse.
âAreyoucheckingmeout,Richards?âHisvoiceisliterallysmoothlikevelvet Likeavelvetyhotchocolateonawinterâs night.
Andthisgirlisthirsty
âNope.âKeepingmyeyefocusedontheroadahead,IgivealittleheadnodinthedirectionIâmdriving.âIâmaone-way kindofgal.Focusingononethingatatime.â
âAone-waykindofgal,huh?âheasks,histoneteasing
âJust,shush,âIsay,laughing.âAndalso,enjoythepaybackofgettingaridewithastranger.Ishoulddrivelikeabatoutof hellandfreakyououtthewholewaybackâ
âBut youâre not a stranger anymore, are you?â He pokes my shoulder with one finger playfully. âYouâre Travisâs little sister.â
âThat I am.â This man smells like sweat, clean sheets, and sandalwood. Why in the world is that combination even appealingtomerightnow?âHesaidyouârehisbestfriend.â
Jakenods,shiftinginhisseatalittle âYourbrotherhasbeengoodtomeovertheyears WewerefriendsbeforeIsigned withhim.â
âFriends first, huh?â I canât hide the grin that plays on my lips âYou know, our parents always said that the best relationshipsstartthatway.Itâshowtheirlovestorystarted.â
âWell,tobefair,heâsnotreallymytype.âHeleansacrosstheseat,closertome.âHeâsalittlemoreintensethanIusually date.â
âFairenough,âIsaywithachuckle,slowingtoturndownmyoldstreet.
âSo,thecroissants,âJakesaysslowly,drawingouteachwordsoitssyllablesarelongerthanever Narrowingmyeyes,Ithrowalookinhisdirection.âWhataboutthem?â
âTheyârereallygood Areyougoingtoopenabakery?â
âMe? No way. This is something Iâmdoing to help bring in extra cash right now. I want to be a personal chef cater privatefunctionsandworkwithpeopleonmealdelivery.Iâvegotaone-yearplan.Iâminmytestingandpracticemodenow.â
âOne-yearplan?â
Turninginto the drivewayofmyformer home, Ikill the ignitionand turninmyseatto face Jake. He has boy-next-door vibeshappeningrightnowlikenobodyâsbusiness Mystomachdipsasmyeyeslockwithhis
âThisyear,IâmputtingmyselfoutthereandworkingonbothlargerfunctionsthatIcancaterwhileIalsohonemypersonal chef skills Mostly on friends at the momentâ Movement fromthe house catches my eye, and I look up to see my mother standinginthefrontbaywindowwatchinguswithaphonepressedtoherear,waving.
Jakefollowswheremyeyesaretrackingandliftsahandtowave.âSheâsalsointense,yourmom.IseewhereTravisgetsit from,butsheâsreallyniceâ
âSheâsoneofmyclientsrightnow.âLiftingashoulderintheair,Isigh.âIgotmyfirstbigbreakthankstomymommy.â
âYouhavetostartsomewhere Sheseemslikeabusywoman Atdinnerlastnight,shementionedlike,eightdifferentclubs andcommitteessheâsapartof.Whatdoesshehaveyoucater?â
âAfewmonthsago,mymomhostedafundraiserforalocalfoodbank Allthemoneygoestowardmealsandgroceryitems forfamiliesintheareawhoarehavingitrough.â
âThatâsagreatcause,andoneIheardaboutlastnight,too,âhesayswithachuckle.
âThatâsmymom.Forthisparticularfundraiser,sheâdtalkedalocalFrenchchefintodoingaprivatemealforeightpeople asoneoftheauctionitems.Sadly,thechefhadtopulloutafewweeksagoduetoafamilyemergencybackinFrance.Shewas stuck,butDadsuggestedIstepinâLaughingsoftly,Ishakemyheadatthememory âShedidnâtliketheideaatfirst,butImade acaseformyself.IwassureIcoulddoit,untilshesaidyes.TheneverydoubtIâveeverhadaboutmyselfseemedtoappearin frontofme Itdoesnâthelpthatshelikestoremindmethatherreputationisintertwinedwithmineâ
Another flicker of movement fromthe house pulls my attention. We both watch as the curtains sway closed and Mom disappearsfromourview Itmakesmealittletwitchy Istartlookinginmyrearviewmirrorandoutthewindows,whichJake picksuponprettyquickly.
âWhatareyoudoing?â
âSheâslikeashark WhenIcanâtseeher,IknowsheâsinthewaterâTurningaroundinmyseat,Ilookattheroadbehindus andgrabmyheart.IdonâtthinkasIreachoutandputmyhandonJakeâsforearm hisverylarge,hard,andimpressiveforearm andgripittogethisattention âLook!Itoldyou Sheâsatthemailboxnowâ
Jakeswivelsinhisseat,hiseyeswidening,buthedoesnâtmovehisarmfromunderneathmyhand.âHowdidshedothat?â âSecrettunnel?Idonâtknow Thewomanhasweirdpowers YousawMandycavewhenImentionedhernameattherink NoonecrossesMadDog.â
âMadDog?â
âItâsthenameTravisandIgaveherafterafreak-outshehadataparentandteacherassociationeventatourhighschool Shewasnâthappywithhow oneoftheteacherswastreatingstudents,andshestoodupandhadhersay.Itwaslikeshecame alivethatnight Ireallydonâtrememberherever beingsovocal aboutthingsinourcommunityuntil then Shegaveaspeech thathad the same fervor as a televangelist. Her eyes were wild, her gestures were exaggerated. Itwas like she mistookher momenttospeakas her time inthe spotlight,because she was intoit.â DoIgiggle atthe memory? YoubetIdo.âItwas the nightMadDogcameoutofhershellandhasnâtlookedback.â
âOkay.âKeepinghiseyesonherasshewalksuptomycar,henodshishead.âIcanseeit.â
âBecareful Sheâllhaveyouvolunteerforsomethingbeforeyouknowwhatâshappeningâ Jakelaughsbutkeepsaneyetrainedonmymom.âIâmhappytodonatesomeitemsifsheneedsthemforafundraiser.â
Iâmsurprisedwhenshesimplytapsonthehoodofthecarandthenkeepsongoingbacktothehouse,notevenpausingto askquestions.Ortoaskmehowthemenuiscoming.Oranything.
Jakeswingshisheadbacktofaceme.âSoyouâreinchargeofamealforyourtype-Amother.Whatdoesthatlooklike?â âTruffles.â
âLikechocolatetruffles?Doessheknowitâsamealofallsugar?â
âNo,notthatkindoftruffles AlthoughIamservingsomeofthesweettrufflesyouârethinkingoffordessertâIcanfeelmy nerd hatcomingoutbecause this is a subjectIlike talkingabout. Food. âIâmusinglocal savorytruffles. Itâs the umami Iâm themingthenightaround Iâvegotsomefriendswholivenearhereandtheyhaveatrufflefarm Theywantedsomepromotion forit,sotheyagreedtohelpsponsorthenightanddonatesometruffles.â
âYouknow,IâvebeenouttoeatatafewnicerestaurantsandIdonâtthinkIâveevergoneforthetruffleanything.â âNoteventrufflefries?âIask,myjawgoingslack âComeon,eventhelocalbarservesthoseâ Helooksatmewoefullyasheshrugs.âNope.Nevertriedâem.â
âYou need to fix that, and quicklyâ As I turn to meet his gaze, something shifts between us Itâs a subtle, almost imperceptiblechange,butIcanfeelitnonetheless.
Icanonlyspeakfor myself, butIâmfeelinga mixofcuriosityand anticipation, a quietacknowledgmentofsome kind of connection. Thereâs a quiet exchange betweenus, a silent conversationunfoldinginthe space betweenour gazes. Itâs as if weâretestingthewaters,exploringtheunspokenpossibilitiesthatliebetweenus.
Icouldalsobeabsolutelyinsane,butpartofmeisfeelingatug,deepintheverycenterofmycore âJake!â
Thesoundofsomeonecallinghisnamemakesourheadsswivelinthedirectionofthehouse,wheremymotherisstanding andwavingatus.ShepointstoJakeandholdsupthehomephone,anarchaicthingtohaveinsomecircles,Iknow,butwedo stillhavealandlinehereattheRichardsproperty
âYouâvegotaphonecall,dear,âsheyellsout.
âIfeellikeweâvebeenoutonadateandaregettingcaughtmakingout.âJusthimsayingthewordsâmakingoutâisenough tosendawildthrillofanticipationrightthroughme
Grippingthesteeringwheel,Ismileandnod.âYeah.Right?Makingout.âAssoonasthewordscomeoutofmymouth,I wanttoshovethembackin What A Nerd
âSeeyalater,Riley.Thanksfortheride.âHeopensthedoorandclimbsout,thecarsuddenlyemptierwithouthisbulknext tome.
Iwatchashesidlesupthefrontpathtothedoor,turningtowaveashegoesinside,andItryhardtoignorethepatterofmy traitorousheart.
Walkingupthestepstomylittleapartmentintown,thesongâIndependentWomenâbyDestinyâsChildalwaysgoesthroughmy head IlovethisplacebecauseIfoundit Ihadafriendandrealtorhelpingmelookforplacesatthetime,butthisoneIfound onmyown.Iwalkedbythedaythatthelandlordputaâforrentâsigninthefrontwindow.
Thebuildingusedtobeathree-storytownhomebuthadbeenbrokendownintothreeseparateapartmentsovertheyears I liveonthesecondfloor,rightaboveacouplewhoarealittlebitâŚhow doIputitpolitely?Letâsjustsaytheyâretwobricks shyofaloadonagoodday Theapartmentabovemeisalsooccupied,butitâsmylandlordâssupercoolaunt,Frannie Shehas owneditforeveranddoesnâtliveherefulltime.ShesavesitfortripsshemakestoSweetkissCreek.Likethisweek.Iraninto hertheotherdayatthemarket,soIknowsheâshere.
Trudgingup the steps to myplace, the smell ofsoftflorals hits mysenses and Iâmgreeted bya huge bouquetofflowers sittinginfrontofmydoor.Roses,lilies,andtulipsarepiledintoagiantglassvase,withfernandeucalyptustuckedinaswell. Igetthedooropen,bendingdowntogatherthearrangementinmyarmsbeforeIgoinsideandkickthedoorclosedbehind me.Placingthebouquetonmykitchentable,IpluckoutthecardonlytofeelalittlesicktomystomachwhenIreadthenote.
âIfIhavetosendyoumoreofthese,Iwill Iâmsorry Imissyou,Riley XOXO,ToddâSighing,Ileanagainstmydeskand lookdownattheaquariumthathousesmymainman,andkeeperofallmysecretsbydefault,BradPitttheturtle. Iholdupthecardtoshowhim.âHekeepstrying,butIâmjustnotthatintohim.â
Brad turns his head in my direction; I know heâs listening to me He may also be sunning himself on a rock, but heâs listening.
Shuddering, I head into the kitchenand pull out the ingredients I need to tryout one of myappetizers for the bachelor auction.Potatoflanwithatrufflecream.
AsIgetthewaterboilingonthestoveandstartpeelingpotatoes,IcanâthelpbutletmythoughtsdriftbacktowhenIdated Todd.Travishadwarnedmenotto,butIhadtoplaywithfire.Ilethimsweepmeoffmyfeet.Itstartedsmall,withacoffee dateafterwemetatagame.IâdgonewithTravistowatchsomenewclientsofhisplay,andToddwasontheteam.Hewasnât theToddTaylor thatpeopleknow now Thesedays,heâsahockeysuperstarwhoisknownfor beingdifficulttoworkwith I cansayIsawitcoming.
Iturnontheovenandpullmypremadetrufflecreamoutofthefridge IgrabthemoldsIneedandgeteverythingorganized beforeputtingitintheoven.Iâvegotfiftyminutes.
While I wait, I run through the shower and try not to entertain the ickiness I feel inside that comes fromhaving dated someonelikeTodd.Somewomenwouldlikethefactthatthisguywastryingtogetbackintheirgoodgraces.Itâsthesecond timeinthepastmonthheâssentflowers.ButIknowtheplayer, and thegame.
Ialsoknowthathumiliationisnotmycolor
Mytimer dings,lettingme know thatthe appetizers are readytotry.Imade waytoomany,butas longas atleastone of themtastesgood,IâllfeellikeIâvegotasolidhandleonthisdish
AsIopentheovendoor,Ihearthefrontdoortotheapartmentupstairsslamshut.Franniemustbehome.Eyeingtheflowers andtheextrapotatoflaninfrontofme,Iknowexactlywherethisstuffcango.
Afewminuteslater,FrannieopensherdoortomyknockwithasurprisedlookonherfaceasIhandherthebouquet âAgain?âsheaskswithawrysmile.âIsthatjerkheadstilltryingtoapologize?â
âYouknow it,â Irespond, waitingfor her to putthe flowers downbefore Ihand her the plate âIâmtryingthis dish an appetizer potatoflanwithatrufflecream.Havesomeandletmeknowwhatyouthink.â
âYouârethebestneighborever Thankyou,dearâFranniethrowsathumboverhershoulderatajerseythatâsstillthrown acrossthebackofherdiningroomchair.âIstillneedtopassonthatjerseytomygrandson.Heâsgoingtoloveit.Iâmsavingit forhisbirthday.â
I eye the familiar fabric Itâs Toddâs jersey that I wore to a few games of his before the lies came out âShame itâs ToddâsâŚâ
âIâmgoingtoencouragehimtosellitoneBay,donâtyouworry,âshejokesasshesqueezesmyarm âOr,maybeinsteadof givingittohim,IshoulduseitfortheBigBrothersBigSistersprogram.â
âAreyouworkingonthatfundraiserwithmymom?â
âIsuream.âFranniefloatsacrossthefoyerandplacesthebouquetonherdiningroomtable.âNotsurewhy,butwehave feweradultsintheareasigningupthanweâvehadinthepast.Itâsdiscouraging,andweneedmorepeople.â
Noddingmyhead,Icrossmyarms âDoyouthinkafundraiserisgoingtodothetrick?â
âIâmnotconvinced.Ithinkweneedadrawcard,somethingbiggerthananightofeducation,andsilentauctionitemslike giftcardstoacoffeeshopandthelike,nooffensetoanycafeowners Itâsjustthatitâsalittleboring,butdonâtyoudaretell yourmotherIsaidthat.â
âNotaproblem,âIsaywithagiggle,still standinginher doorway.âButIthinkyouâreright.Anythoughtsor ideasfor a newwaytorecruit?â
âNot yet, but Iâmbrainstorming,â Frannie says. âI feel like we need to get some people inwho canspeakto what the programisaboutandhowtheyhelpedthem.â
âLikepastlittlebrothersandsisterswhoarenowolderandmaybepayingitforward?â âYes,oroneswhohavegoneontogreatthings.LikethePorterboys.â
âOh,thatistrue!âMyheadnodsautomatically âIalwaysforgetthosetwogrewupwithoutadadâ
âYep.Theirmomisamazing.SheâsmentionedtomeinthepastthattheBigBrothersBigSistersprogramhelpedherand thematatimewhenshewasatherwitâsendâ
ThePorterbrothersarenotonlymytrufflesupplier,buttheyârealsoalittlebitfamousfortheseparts.Bothboyswerestars ofourfootballteaminhighschoolandhavegoneontoplayforopposingNFLteams.TheyâreabsolutedreamboatswhoTravis andIgrewupwith LeviandAustinarehilarious,atraitthatisshowcasedontheirweeklypodcasttheyhosttogether âYouknow,Iâmgoingtoseethemthisweektopickupsometruffles.Doyouwantmetofeelthemoutforyou?â
Frannieâseyeslightup âWouldyou?Thatwouldbeamazing TheyarethekindofdrawthatIthinkcouldgetmoreadultsto signuponcetheyheartheirstory.â
âIâmhappytoseewhattheysayâItakeastepbackandtossahandintheair âI'llletyouknowwhathappensâ We say goodbye and I head back to my place, closing the door behind me. The slight movement sends the scent of somethinglikecleansheetsandsandalwoodtomysenses,andasnapofexcitementmakesmesigh. ItsmellslikeJake
SweetkissCreekisquietthismorning.IlikesneakinginarunasoftenasIcan,butIlovedoingitfirstthingintheday,and ifIcandoitwhentherestoftheworldiseitherjustwakingupormaybeslowlyrealizingitâstimetogetup,evenbetter
Rileyâs dad had to leave to open the cafe early this morning, so I hitched a ride and had him drop me off at a campgroundjustoutsideoftownsoIcouldmakemywayin.Heâsamanofmanyfacets,andcars.Today,hecameinhisPrius, butIcanâtlieIwashopingheâdfireuptheâ63Mustang Maybeanotherday
StartingmydayjoggingbesidealakesoundedlikesomethingIcoulduserightnowtoclearmyhead.Therewasonething, oroneperson,whokeepshangingoutrent-freeinmythoughts,andifIâmhonestwithmyself,Idonâtmindit Notonebit
Fromthe moment she jumped into the back of my car and scared the crap outta me, Iâve been pretty intrigued by this woman Travishastoldmeabouthislittlesister,whohisdadadoresbutapparentlymakeshermomcrazy Ihavefriendswith kidswhowouldattesttothefactthatitâsamother-and-daughterthing.IwonderwhatRileywouldsayitwas?
Themorningairhasachill,butthereâswarmthinthesunshinetoday.Ineverthoughtthatbeginningthisyearwithmynew teamIâdbeendingittryingtogobacktomyoldone,andprettymuchinthedoghousewithahandfulofpeopleIrespectwith all ofmyheart. Iâd made the jump fromthe River CityRenegades to be seen Ihad a chance to getona teamwithseveral otherplayerswhoitâsbeenrumoredareontheirwaytotheNHL
WhenIwasaskedtojointhem,Isawanopportunity.Inmymind,Icouldgetonthatteamandnotonlymakeabiggername formyselfthere,butasotherplayersclimbedoutofAHLstatusandmoveduptothenextleague,Iwantedtoatleastreplace themifIwasnâtgoingwiththem.EverythingIheardabouttheteamsoundedlikeitwouldbeagoodmove.OneIcouldmake smoothlyandeasily,apathwiththeleastresistance.
Onlyitwasnât Concentratingonmyfeetastheylandontheground,crunchingtherockonthegravelpath,Iâmremindedof thenot-so-welcomewelcomeIwasgivenwhenIarrived.Iwasbarelyacknowledged,notthatIneededtoalwaysbe,butIwas new Youwouldthinkthatbeingateam,thedynamicswouldbedifferent Well,theywere,butitwasthattheyweredifferent fromtheteamIhadchosentoleave.Thecaptainoftheteam,knowninthepressforbeingabitofanarcissisticbuttholebut alsolovedbecauseheâsareallyamazingplayer(thingsIâllneverunderstandaboutthehumanpsyche),triedtofightmeonthe icethatfirstday.
Iâmnotthekindofguywhostandsdownfromanything,butIdotrytostayawayfromtrouble.Mydadtaughtmebetterthan that Iâmalsobig,sowhygetintoafightwithanyone?Butwhenyouâvegotsomeoneyoursizeorevenbiggerslamminginto youonpurposeoverandover,andinyourfirstpractice,youbegintothinkitâsmorethanasimplehazing.
TheteamIâdcomefrom?Thebest TheRenegadesarelike,themostsupportivegroupever Ourcoach,afamilymanwho alwayshadhiskidsaroundhelpingout.Theplayersmadesurethatifanyonecameintoourhouseandwasnewtotheteam,no matteriftheywereontheicewithus,workedinthearena,orintheoffices,theyfeltlikefamily.Itwasafamily,agreatbig wonderfulonethatstucktogether,evenhangingoutonholidays,andIhadtogoandsplititup
Islowdowntocheckmytimeonlytofindanewsalerthaspoppeduponmyphone.Nottosoundnarcissisticmyself,but duetothisreporterwhoâstryingtotearmedown,Iâdsetupanalertonmyname Anditlookslikesheâsatitagain âJake Decemberâs career inlimbo.â Itake a calmingbreathinthroughmynose and breathe itall outthroughmymouth slowly,takingasecondtobendoverandtouchmytoes,hangingtherelimpandswaying âWhy,Greta Whyareyoudoingthis tome?â
âUmmm,âavoicesaysslowly,laughing,âareyouawarethereâsnoonenamedGretaaround?â Standingupstraight,myheartslamsinmychestwhenIlookintotheeyesofagigglingRiley Sheâsgotherhairpulledback intoabunatthebaseofher neckandiswearingatrucker hatwiththeRenegadeslogoonit.Idonâtthinkshehasatraceof makeupon,yetsheâsglowing,whichcanbeafeatatthistimeofmorningforanyone Superheroesincluded Toputitinnormaldudespeak,shelookshot.Iâdgosofarastosaysheâsonfire.Anditâsnoteveneightinthemorning. âHey,âImanage,tryingtohidethenervousstutterthatthreatens ItâsanoldanxietytraitIâvehadtoworkonovertheyears Rileyeyesmewithamischievousgrin.âSo,Greta.Isshesomeoneworthnoting?â âNo.âIholdupahandtostopher fromsayinganythingmore,andher eyeswiden.âSorry,IthinkIsaidthatwithalittle
moreaggressionthanImeantto.â
âHey.Noproblemhere.âRileyholdsupahand,wavingitintheairasifsheâswipingthemomentaway.âIshouldnâthave beennosyâ
WeârestandingattheedgeofLakeLoreleiinasmallparkwithapromenadethatlinkstothemainstreetintown.Theedges ofthesmallparkarelinedwithgardenbedsburstingwithcolorfulflowerslikephlox,tulips,irises,anddaffodils Afewpark benchesandpicnictables arescatteredabout,partlyfilledbypeoplesippingontheir coffees andplayinggames ofchess or checkers
Thereâsalsoanoldfountaininthemiddleofthegreenspace,rightbehindRiley,andontheother sideofthatisacoffee cartthatâssetupandopenforthemorningcrowd.Theambientnoiseofwaterasitrollsontothelakeshoreiscalming. Incliningmyheadtowardthecart,Ilockmyeyeswithhers âWereyoudoinganotherdelivery?â âOh,youbetIwas.âShethrowsathumbover her shoulder tothecart.âThreedaysaweekIâmdownhere,droppingoff theirorder Iusuallygoforarunafterwardâ
âAh.âIfeellikeIâmbeingcuedtosomething,soIstepback.âDonâtletmekeepyou.â
âActually,âshesaysasshelooksaround,âIwokeuponthebackfootthismorning Isthatevenasaying?â
âItis,butIthinkitâsmeantthatyouâdbedefensive.Like,inalessthanadvantageouspositioncomparedtosomeoneyouâre opposing.â WhenIsee the lookonher face, Icracka smile. âIâma bitofa nerd. WhenIwas incollege, Itooka class in linguisticsanddidastudyonidiomsâ
Icantellsheâsbitingbackherlaughter.Herlipsarenâtmoving,buthereyesgiveitaway.
âThatâsunexpectedâ
âIpridemyselfonbeingfullofsurprises.â
âIâmsurprisedtohaverunintoyouagainsosoon,âshequips.âSo.IsGretaalsoasurprise?â
Rollingmyeyes,Islipmybodyintoastandinghamstringstretch.âGretaissomeoneIoncekindadated.Thingsended,I thoughtamicably,butapparentlyshedoesnâtfeelthesameway.â
Shecocksherheadtotheside âAndsheâsmakingyourlifehardrightnow?â âSheâsasportsreporterwhohasthepoweroftheinternetandsocialmediabehindher.â
âAhhh Sosheâsenjoyingthefactyouâreamanwithoutateamrightnowandseenasawildcard?â
âThatâsputtingitlightly,butyeah.Sheâsenjoyingitbecauseitgetsherheadlines.â
âAndyoudidnâtdoanythingtomakehermadwhenyoubrokeup?â
âIthoughtIhandleditallthebestwayIcould.ItookheroutfordinnerâŚâ Rileyâsfacescrunches.âOhhhh.Pleasedonâttellmeyoudiditinpublic.â
âImean,theconversationleanedthatwayatdinner,soIwentwithitâ
âYoutookher outtoeat,andwithoutwarningyoubrokethings offinapublicsettingsoshehadtoholditall in ifshe helditallin,thatis untilyouleftandweresomewheremoreprivatetotalk,then?â
âImeanâŚâIâmfindingitsomewhatcomicalthatIâmhavingtoexplainthisrightnow.âIwascomingfrompracticeandshe wascomingfromwork,sowemetattherestaurant.â
âYoumaybeemotionallystuntedâRileyâsfaceisseriousasshethreadsherarmstightlyinfrontofherchest âYoudidnât evendriveherhomeafteroroffertotalkfurther,didyou?â
âWell âIsearchmybrainforananswer,anykindthatwonâtmakemesoundasmuchofabuffoonasitdoesnow,butIâve gotnothing. Inless thantwo minutes, this new-to-me womanhas shownme the mirror and pointed outwhere Iwentwrong. âYeah,no Ithoughtweweregoodwhenweleft Ipaidthebillandwehuggedoutside,andthatwasthatâ
âOh,man.Andsheâsareporter?âRileydoesatsktskassheshakesherhead.âIâvebeenaroundmybrotherlongenoughto knowthatthereâsopticstoconsiderineverypartofwhatyoudoonceyouâreplayingatacertainlevel,Jake.Butyouwentand datedasportsreporterandthenyoubrokeupwithherinpublic?Ohhhh,pooryou Sheâsgonnawantrevengeforsureâ
âYouârenothelping,âImutterasIstarttostretchmyotherleg.Butsheâsgotapoint.
âSorry Iâlldropit NomoreGretaspeak WeâllcallherVoldemort,okay?â
ThiswomanhasdroppedaHarryPotterreferenceandIâmhereforit.âDeal.â Riley, whose arms had beencrossed tightlyinfront of her, lets themdrop to her side Turningat the waist, she points behindhertothecoffeecart.âWanttohaveacoffeewithme?Mytreat.â
Ilookatthecart,thenbacktoRiley.Icouldsayno.Goonmyway,keeprunning,andthengototherinktopracticelikeI wasplanning Icoulddothatandthengobacktothinkingaboutmymistakes,thechoicesIâvemade,andwhereIâmatnowand probablycontinuetobeatmyselfupsomemore.Iâllendupbackathome,well,Rileyâshomeinheroldbedroom,holdingmy dogandwonderingwhereIwentwrong SoofcourseIâmgoingtosayyes âLoveto.âIholdmyhandout.âLeadtheway.â
As we approach the cart, the older man running it appears in the window with a huge grin sweeping across his face, showingallofhisteeth.
âRiley.Youârestillhere?â