HOUSE OF LIGHT AND ETHER
GILDED CITY BOOK THREE LEIA STONE
CONTENTS
Chapter1
Chapter2
Chapter3
Chapter4
Chapter5
Chapter6
Chapter7
Chapter8
Chapter9
Chapter10
Chapter11
Chapter12
Chapter13
Chapter14
Chapter15
Chapter16
Chapter17
Chapter18
Chapter19
Chapter20
Epilogue
AbouttheAuthor Acknowledgments
To anyone who has ever suffered from depression or hopelessness. May the Light reach you and lead you out of the darkness
ONE
IawokeindarknessfromanightmarewhereIwasswimminginapoolofbloodastheQuorumlaughedfromabove,tellingme mysoulwouldendupintheBottomlessPit.
MyhearthammeredagainstmychestasIsatupandpeeredaroundtogetmybearings.Silvershaftsofmoonlightsplintered throughtheopeningofacaveofsorts,andmybreathingslowed Ipeeredouttheentrance,atthesilhouetteofYanricperched atopRanger thehorseQueenSolanahadgivenme justoutside.Asmallsnoringsoundcamefrombesideme,andIcraned myneckatthesleepingformnexttome
MasterClarke.
My father
ThememoryofeverythingcamerushingbacktomethenandIranshakyfingersthroughmyhair.Ihadgonedark,litBlairâs haironfire,andthenalmostburneddowntheforest.ThenMasterClarkehadtouchedmyskinuntilIpassedout.Whywashe stillhere?Ishouldleave Ishouldgetonmyhorseandjustleavehim HedidnâtneedtostaywithmewhileIwentinsane
âNightmare?â Yanricasked.
Ipeeredatmybirdandnodded MyskinstillburnedalittlefromMasterClarkeholdingmeforsolong Iwouldkillfora coolbathrightaboutnow.
âWe should leave him Heâll only get hurt,â ItoldYan
IwasmadatMasterClarkefornottellingmethathewasmyrealfather,butIdidnâtwanthimtogetinjured.âReal fatherâ feltwrongtothink.Therewasnorealer father thantheonewhoraisedme,butIdidnâthaveawordfor whatMaster Clarke was Extradad?AbsentfatherwholeftmewailingintothenightatthegatesofIsariah?
MythoughtswenttoAriyon,Eden,myfatherâŚbutIpushedthemaside.Thinkingofthepastwasnâtgoingtohelpanything. Theyweresafeandthatâsallthatmattered Ididnâthavetheemotionalcapacitytocareaboutthemanymore Ihadtofigureout whatYanandIweregoingtodo.
âWhere do we go?â Yanricasked,shakinghimselfalittleasiftowakehimselfup.
Isighed.IdidnâtwanttogotoMarissa.Ireallydidnât.ButIfearedshewastheonlyonewhowouldunderstandwhatIwas goingthrough. Her letter did sayshe could help me withmypower. Evenifher intentwas to teachme how to grow it, she mightalsoknowhowtocontrolit
âLies,âastrangemalevoicesaidinmymind,andIwhimpered.HearingthevoicesmoreoftenmeantIwasgettingworse. MasterClarkestirredbesideme,andIfroze,notwantingtowakehim Ididnâtwanttoarguewithhimorriskhurtinghimif mytemperrose.Ijustwantedtobealone.
âWeâll go to Marissa Follow the map, â ItoldYanric. Henodded. âMaybe while we are there, we can get some intel and stop the war before it even starts Maybe thatâs how you save everyone. â
TheprophesiedNightlingwar was somethingIhadnâtthoughtalotabout ButYanricwas right IfIwentintotheir inner sanctum,maybeIcouldlearntocontrolmypowerandthengobacktotheGildedCityandtellSolanaeverythingIknewabout theircamp
âMaybe we attack them first. Wipe them out before they ever come for us, â ItoldYanasImovedtoslowlystand.IfIwent darkbuttookMarissaandalloftheNightlingsdownfirst,thenitwouldbeworthit.
Ahandsnakedoutandgrippedmycloth-coveredwrist,clampingdownhard Istartled,lookingdownandfindingMaster Clarkeâsdeterminedgaze.
âGivemeachancetohelpyou IfIfail,youcanrunofftotheBarrenMountainsandgodarkinacavealoneifthatâswhat youplease.âHis voicewas thickandgravellywithsleep,buthis words shookme.TheBarrenMountains.Hethoughtthatâs whereIwouldgo?Peoplestilllivedthere,thoughsparsely No,IwouldnotgoanywhereIcouldbringharmtoasinglesoul
âYoucanâthelpme.Youâllonlygethurt,âItoldhim.
He released mywrist and sat up. âIâmokaywiththat, Fallon.â He held mygaze and mythroat tightened. What was he saying?
âYouâreokaywithmeburningyoualiveifyoupissmeoff?âIsnapped.
Henoddedonce âIfitmeansthereisachancetosaveyou,Iamâ Tearsfilledmyeyes,butIblinkedthemback.Itwasweirdtocryyetfeelnothinginside.
Inthatmoment,hisblindloyaltyandcareformysafetyremindedmeofmyfather myrealfather,atitleIâdnevergiveto him.HewasMasterClarke,amanwhoapparentlywasseducedintolyingwithMarissaonenight,andIwasabyproductof that.
âLetâsstartfromthebeginningâHepulledoutathick,well-wornnotebookandanothertomebesideit,oneIrecognized It wasthebookHayeshadfoundinthelibrary,theonethatspokeofsomeonefromtheHouseofAshusingmindcontrol.
âYouârehearingvoices?âheasked
Mychestfelttight,myheartracing.Whatdidhethinkhecoulddo?Readhiswayoutofmyproblem?
Yanricflew fromRangerâsbackandlandedonmyshoulder âHe knows the risks and heâs willing to help It canât hurt Marissa will be our last resort.â
IpeeredatClarkeagainandnoddedonce.
ClarkelookedatYanric âYou?Mysteriousvoices?â Mybirdnoddedonce.
âYou hear the same ones as I do?âIaskedhim Hewasquietamoment. âAnd more, â heshared. Ifrowned.MasterClarkebegantotakenotesinhisbookandthenrifledthroughsomepages.
âItsaysherethatthefamiliaractuallytakesthebruntofthesymptomsatfirst.SoYanricwillbefeelingthemostagitated, hearingthings,havingnightmares,lossofpowercontrol.â
Ilookedatmyfamiliarwithanopenmouth âYan, is that true?â
Hesimplynoddedonceagain,andIreachedupandpulledhimdowntomychest,clutchinghimagainstme.Thenormally warm,fuzzyfeelingsIhadforhimfeltliketheywerehiddenunderathickblanketofdesperation,anditwassofrustrating,I wantedtoscream.
âIcanâtchase awaythe sadness,â Itold Master Clarke, a tear fallingdownmycheek. âIcanâtstop cryingeither. Ihave nightmares.Ifeelnumbattimes,andwhenIgetangryâŚâItrailedoff,andMasterClarketookmorenotes,noddingasifthisall madesense.
âYoucanâtcontrolit,âhefinishedforme Isighed,releasingYan,andheflewfrommyarmsintotheforest.
âGoing hunting,â hesaid,butIfeltthathetoowashavingtroublefeelingnormal,feelinghappinessorlove MasterClarketappedthebooks.âItsayshereyoucarrythemagicofyourancestors.Forexample,thepowertoswitch,like youdidwithAriyon,wasgiventoyoubyAmethystBane.â
âIknow,âItoldhim,unabletokeepmytonefromcomingoutsharp âIthinkthevoicesyouheararenotpsychosis.Ithinktheyareremnantsofyourancestorsastheirmagicbuildsupinsideof youâ
Relief rushed throughme at that. I mean, it didnât make it anybetter. I was still hearingvoices those of disembodied spiritsifhewasright butitmeantIwasnâtcompletelylosingmymind âSowhatdoesthatmean?Canwestopthem?â
Clarke chewed athis lip. âIâmnotsure aboutthatyet. Now thatIknow aboutthe true historyofthe House ofAshand Shadow,Iwondersomethings Likewhatiftheexperimentationonyourpeoplewastotwisttheirmagictobecomemoreand morepowerfulwitheachgeneration?â
Astonesankinmygut âThenIwillbethemostpowerfulBanetoeverlive?â Henodded.âAndatthemostriskforgoingdark.â
Hiswordsonlymademefeelworse NowIjustworriedthatIâdgoevendarkerthanMarissaandlightthewholeworldon fire.
Ifoundmythoughtsgoingtosadplaces,pullingonoldwoundsinmyheartliketheloosethreadsofasweater.Itwouldnât stopuntilthewholethingunraveledonme
âDidyouevertrytovisitme?âIasked,onthevergeoflosingmynerve.âWhenIwasachild?â
Master Clarke stiffened beside me He sethis bookdownand nodded âIhad to stayawaycompletelyfor the firstfive years. I was worried that Marissa herself would be looking for you. I knew there was a possibility she would become a Nightlingand be reborn. Ijustprayed itwould never happen. Ithankthe LighteverydaythatQueenSolana never used her poweroftruthoverme.â
Istayedquiet,unabletoimaginehavingachildoutintheworldandnotgoingtoseethemorevenmeetthemonce.
âSolana knew Marissa hadyoubefore she died. She was activelylookingfor a child withdarkpowers anda curse that causedherpainwhentouched.âHeshookhisheadasifhewaslostinthememory.âButafteraboutfiveyears,thingshaddied down Solanalostinterestinhersearchforyou IthoughtthenthatyoumightnotbegettingenoughtoeatinIsariah Theyare knownforbeingapoorerpeople.Ialsoworriedyoumightbegettingbulliedormistreatedforyourcurse,soItookleaveand wenttocheckonyouâ
Iheldmybreath.I was bulliedformycurse.I did gohungrysometimes.ButsomehowitwasallokaybecauseIwasalso verylovedbymyfather;mybestfriendbackhome,Sorrel;andmyoldbossatthetavern,Hipsie Isariahhadtreatedmewell enough.Ihadnocomplaintsthere.
MasterClarkegavemeasidelongglancethen.âIwanttobefullyhonestherewithyou,Fallon.Iintendedtotakeyouthat day,toraiseyoumyselfinthemountainsaboveMoonsreachâ
Igasped.Takemefrommyfather?Sorrel?Myhome?Funnilyenough,Moonsreachwaswheremyfatherhadsuggestedus runningawaytoifIeverwentdark
MasterClarkeranashakyhandthroughhishair.âIpackedabagforthebothofus,leftwordwithSolanathatIwasgoing onleavetoseeasickcousinandplannedtonevercomebacktoTheGildedCityagainâ
Icouldnâtspeak.Iwasgobsmacked.
âWhathappened?â
âWhenIsawyou,âhesaid,smilinginawaythatmadehiswholefacelightup,âyoulookedjustlikeMarissa Therewas sometypeofflowerfestivalgoingon,andyouâdjustbeengivenabouquetofwildflowersfromsomenicewoman.â
Inoddedatthememory,findingitwithinmetosmilealittleaswell Irememberedthatfestival Itwasoneofmyearliest memories.Iwasfive,Hipsiehadgivenmeabouquet,andIwassoexcitedtoshowmydad.
âYouwore little browngloves,andyourantoa tall man,callingoutâDaddy!âIrealizedthenthatitwas the manwhoâd takenyouin.Irememberthewayhebeamedatyou,thewayhetenderlytookthebouquetfromyourlittleglovedfingersand smelledit,tellingyoutheywerethemostbeautifulflowersinalltherealm,justlikeyou.âClarkeâsvoicecaught.âItbrokemy heartandrepaireditallatonce IknewthenthatIcouldnâttakeyoufromhim,fromthenicewomanwhogaveyoutheflowers, fromanyofit. Youwere healthyand loved and thriving. Iwould onlymake your life worse.â He turned awayfromme in shame âSoIleft,knowingyouweregettingeverythingyouneededâ
Griefwelledupinsidemeathisconfession,butitwasquicklyreplacedwithnumbness.Everythinghesaidwastrue,other thanmehavingall thatIneeded.âIwouldhavelikedtoknow youtoo.Ineededyoutoo,âItoldhim,andhereachedoutand squeezedmyhandhard,nodding.
âYouhavemenow,andIwillnotrestuntilIhavesavedyoufromgoingdark,Fallon.IswearitontheLight.â
I simplynodded because, while I knew he felt what he spoke was true, that didnât make it anymore likelyto actually happen.
ONE MONTH later
âNowcontrolit!âMasterClarkescreamed.âLikeweâvepracticed.â
SweatbeadedmybrowasragerushedthroughmesohotthatIwantedtodecimateeverytreewithinthevicinity.âIcanât!â I bellowed, the power overtaking me, causing shadows to crawl along the forest floor and creep toward the charred mountainsidewhereIpracticedeveryday.Fireeruptedfrommypalms,andMasterClarkeleaptintomyfieldofvision.
âYouarestrongerthanthis,Fallon Thinkofitlikeafaucet,andjust turn it off!âhegrowled,andhelduponeofhisstupid books.Heâdbeengettingashortertemperlately,andIheardhimwhimperinginthenightlikehewashavingnightmares.Idonât thinkheâdeveradmitit,butIfearedthatbeingnearmewascausinghimtogodarkaswell,likeithadintheolddaysbefore Marissawentdark,backwhentheoriginalHouseofAshandShadowwascreatedandthosefaewhoweretooclosetothem wentdarkaswell.
Yanricletoutacawashetooktotheskies,thetipsofhiswingssmoking Hewaslosingcontrolofhisformmoreandmore lately.Wewereallunraveling.
TearsleakedfrommyeyesasIlookedatthebookMasterClarkewasholdingup âNoamountofstudyingcanfixme!âI roared,andthebookburstintoflamesinhisveryhands.Heyelped,hissingashedroppedthebooktothefloor,andstampedit outwithhisfeet.
I gasped, mypowers shuttingoff completelyas Master Clarke clutched his hands to his chest. The smell of burnt flesh lingeredintheair.
âNo,âIbreathed,stumblingbackward
He looked atme pleadingly. âFallon, Iâmfine. Itâs justa little burn, nothingIhavenâtdone while cooking.â Buthe was lying Icouldseeinhisfacethathewasinpain
âLetmesee,âIbegged.Already,though,myguiltwasbeingchasedawaybynumbness.
âIâmfine.Iâllgowrapthemand â
âLetmesee!âIyelled,andthebushtotherightofhimexplodedwithpurpleflames Heswallowedhard,thenproducedhispalmsformetoinspect.AgarbledcryleftmylipswhenIgazeduponthebubbled, redskin
âYouneedahealer.IâŚIneedtogo.Youârenotsafewith â
âFallonâMasterClarkesteppedinmywayasImovedtowalktotheabandonedtwo-bedroomcabinweâdsharedoverthe pastmonth.
âThiswasexpected.Iknew therisks.Iâmokay.Ihaveatinctureforthepainandtokeepawayinfection.Iâllbefine.We needtokeepworking Youâvemadesomuchprogress,âhepleaded
Ilaughedthen,asYanricdovedownandlandedonmyshoulder.âProgress?Ionlygetfourhoursofsleepanightbecause ofthenightmares Thevoicesarewithmedailynow Andmypowersaremoreoutofcontrolthanever!â
Butathismentionoftincture,myminddriftedbacktoTheGildedCity,toAvis.Shewasthemothertousall.Iwondered then how the apothecary was doing on the East Side, if her plan to open an undercover clinic there was in motion Were residentscominginfortheirâicecreamâandleavinghealed?WasHayeshelpingout?WasAriyon?
Atthethoughtofmyfirstandonlylove,myheartrippedintoathousandpieces.How couldIhavejustlefthimlikethat? HowcouldInotevensaygoodbyetohim?
ButthenIrecalledthelookonhisfaceafterIâdhurtBlair.
Hewasscaredofme,andrightfullyso WhichwaswhyIhadturnedawayeveryletterhetriedtosendthrougharavento MasterClarkeandmadeClarkepromisenottotellAriyonoranyonefromTheGildedCitywherewewere.
âFallon,deepbreaths.âMasterClarkeâspanickedvoicebroughtmebacktomyself.
Oh Light! We were standinginside a funnel of blackshadows, a ringof purple fire dancingat the edge of the treeless meadowwestoodin.
âStaywithme Stayincontrol,âClarkecoached âI miss them too,â Yanricsaid,asatearrolleddownmycheekandIangrilyswipeditaway. Itookinadeepbreathandcontinueddoingsoslowlyuntiltheshadowfunnelcollapsedandthefirewasnothingmorethan aringofsmoke.
Clarkelookedrelieved.Proud.Smiling.âSee?Togetherwecancontrolthis.â
Iforcedmyselftoreturnhissmile,butthenIlookedatYanric.Ididnâtevenneedtosaythewords.Healreadyknew. âWe leave tonight,â hesaid.
Ijustnoddedonce IwasnâtgoingtoletMasterClarkegethurtagain Itwaskindofhimtohelpmewithmymagicallthese weeks.Buttodayhadprovedthatthirtydaysofcountlesshoursoftraininghaddonenothingbutmakemestrongerandlessin control Ifearedweâdmadeitworse Thepowerinsideofmehadgrownsobig,itfeltlikeIwassuffocating Itwascompeting forroominsideofme,eatingupthepartsofmethatusedtobelightandbrightandfulloflife.
Iwasgrowingdeadinside andIcouldnâtevencryaboutitanymore.
IhadnoregretsasIslippedoutofthecabin,intothecoolnightairwithmypackonandYanricperchedonmyshoulder Ihad enoughdecencystill leftinme toknow thatIcaredfor Master Clarke andwouldnever forgive myselfifIseriouslyinjured him.He hadtriedhis best.Iâdgivenhimamonth.Ithadnâtworked.Iwalkedtothe meadow where Ranger was tiedupand pulledhisreinsfromthetreestump
âReadyforanadventure?âIstrokedhisneck,andhechuffed.
SeeingRangermademethinkofAriyonagain OfSolana Myfather Eden Everyone Imissedthemallsomuch,itcaused mychesttofeellikeitwassplittingopen,butthiswasforthebest.MasterClarkeoftensentwordviaraventoTheGildedCity toassurethequeenwewerebothaliveandwellandthatmypowerswereundercontrol Hesaidthatifhedidnât,shewould sendanarmyafterme.Buthenevertoldherwherewewere,andhespelledtheravenswithsometincturesotheycouldnâtbe followedortracedbacktous.
Ipulled outthe map thatMarissa had sentme withher note and unfolded it Was this crazy? Goinginto the bellyofthe beast?
WhatifshejuststolemybloodforthelocketaroundSolanaâsthroatandthenkilledme?
âShe canât kill you. She needs an heir in order to rule,â Yanricremindedme.
That was true I could kill her, just blast her with as much magic as possible the first time I saw her but I knew I wouldnât.IfIwasbeinghonest,therewasaverysmallpartofmethatwantedtohearhersideofthings,thathopedshecould helpmecontrolmypowerorthatImightbeabletotalkheroutofherplannedNightlingattackthatEmmeric,theEaldorFae, hadspokenof theeventthatwouldtakemylife
Iknew Marissa was hungryfor power.She hadkilledalotofpeople inher attackonthe school andmurderedAriyonâs parentsinthemostbrutalway,andyet,Icouldnâthelpbutunderstandatinybitwhatitwasliketolosecontrol Ihadnâtmeant to lightBlairâs hair onfire or burnMaster Clarkeâs hands. Whatifshe hadnâtmeantto kill all those students inthe school either?
Yanricclearedhisthroat,andIglancedatmybird. âI donât want Marissa to be a psycho mass murderer either, but letâs not forget she used mind control to force Master Hart to keep the doors closed so that everyone would burn.â
Shame rushedthroughme athis words He was right Iwas makingexcuses for her,tryingtosee her ina better light,to rationalizewhyIwasgoingtohernow.
âSay the word, and Iâll head for the mountains Tell me going to see Marissa is crazy, â ItoldYanric âYouâre crazy, â afemalevoicecackledinmyhead,andIbitdownonmylipsindesperation.
Yanricsighed,snugglingintomyneckandburrowinghisheadthere. âI think sheâs the only one in the realm that might be able to help slow down whatever is happening to us If she tries to hurt you, Iâll take both of her eyes â Ichuckled. âI love you, little murder bird.â âAnd I, you Though I do miss what it feels like to be happy,âhesaid,anditwaslikeapunchtothegut Happiness,joy, deepbellylaughter,Eden,Ariyon,Ayden.Allthosethingsthatusedtomakemesmile,oh,howImissedthemtoo.IfeltlikeI wasnâteventhatpersonanymore,likethatFallonhaddiedandthisnew Fallonreplacedher,andIjusthadtocometoterms withit.
Takinginadeepbreath,IangledRangerinthedirectionMarissahadindicatedwasNightlingCityonthemap.
Light help us all
I
WANTED tostopandrestbutfearedClarkewouldcomeaftermethemomenthewokeintheearlymorninghours.Ididnât wanttogivehimtimetocatchupwithme Ialsodidnâtwanttoleadhimtodanger Marissahadlovedhimonce,butIdidnât thinkshedidanymore.ShemightkillhimonthespotforallIknew.
Clarkehadfoundthemaprecently Aboutaweekago,hehadbeencleaningupthecabin Mybaghadgottenwet,soIâd hungeverythingouttodry,andheâdfoundit.Heopenedit,lookedatit,lookedatme,andcloseditagain. Then,hejustsaidthreewords.âDonâtgothere.â
Likeheknewwhatitwas Likeheâdbeenthere Maybehehad.MaybethatâswherehestolemefromherwhenIwasababy. Butifthatwere the case, whynottell QueenSolana? Maybe ifshe amassed a bigenougharmy, she could wipe outthe entirevillageorwhateveritwasinonefellswoop,andwecouldendthis.ButIknewthatwouldnâtwork.Theonlythingthat killedNightlingsintheirshadowformwastheUndyingFire AndIwastheonlyonewhohadthat
Iguess thebigger questionwas whyhadnât I told QueenSolana? Iâd had this map for over a monthnow. Iknew Master Clarkewassendingwordviaraventoher.IcouldhavesentthemapâŚ
Itwasliketherewasawargoingoninsideofme OnesidewantedMarissatobereasonable,tobeabletobeconvinced thatherquestforpowerwasfruitless.Theothersidejustwantedherdead.
HowcouldIforgetshehaddrivenanaxeintotheheartofthemanIlove?
Igrowledinfrustration,hatingthatIwasunabletotrustmydecision-makinganymore.Wasthispartofgoingmad?
Atwigsnappedbesideme,causingmetospininthedirectionjustasYanricflewfrommyshouldertogocheckitout
Accordingto the map, we were close to her camp. Could these be scouts? Or justananimal? Weâd beenridinghalfthe night,andmorningwasduesoon.Mylimbswereheavywiththeneedforsleep.
âNightling incoming!â Yanricannounced,andIpulledtheUndyingFireintomypalmswithease Twoballsofpurpleflamesrestedinthecenterofmypalms,asacloudofshadowssolidifiedbeforemeintoafemalefae. The womanhad long, blond hair and a tattoo of a spider onher neck She looked at the purple fireballs inmypalms and grinned.âYoucanputthoseaway.Marissawillbehappytoseeyou.â
ThenshepoofedbackintoastreamofblackshadowsandbegantofloatalongthepathinfrontofRanger.
âI think she wants us to follow her,â Yanricsaidashelandedonmyshoulder.
MyhearthammeredinmychestasIwrestledwithwhatIwasdoing.WasIseriouslygoingtoseeMarissaBanewillingly?
âTalk me out of this, Yan Give me all the reasons we shouldnât do this,â Isaidtomyfamiliar He looked atme withhis beady, little blackeyes and blinked rapidly. âWe tried everything. We gave Master Clarke a month I donât know what else we could do on our own Weâve only become stronger â
Hewasnâtgoingtotalkmeoutofit hewastalkingme into it.Andhewasright.
Butthere was thatnaggingfeelingdeepinside ofme thattoldme neither ofus was thinkingclearly.Thatthis was a bad ideaandIwastoodepressedandnumbtoknowit.
Theshadowyfigurestoppedinfrontofmeasifwaitingformetofollow.IswallowedhardandgraspedRangerâsreins.I rodeforashortwhile,lettingaNightlingleadmeintothefortifiedgatesofarun-downcity
Mygazeflickedleftandrightaswewalkedthroughthecity.Orwhatwasonceacity.Itlookedlikeithadnâtbeentaken care ofinatleasta century Overgrownvines creptupthe sides ofthe buildings ifyoucouldcall thembuildings The top halveswerecrumblingandopentotheskyabove.Rangerwhinnied,butIforcedhimtokeepgoingwithalightsqueezeofmy heels.
âItâsokay,boy,âItoldhim
TheroadwasbrokenandunevenastheshadowyNightlinginfrontofusledusdeeperinside.
âPeople live here?â IaskedYanric ItwasnâtwhatIhadexpected IdidnâtknowwhatIhadexpectedreally,butitwasnât this.
âI think they spend most of their time in shadow form They probably donât care where they live,â Yanricmused A horrified thought struck me then. He was right. Ariyon had said that while he was stuck in the Realm of Rebirth, Nightlingsâbodieswerepresenttherewhentheywerepresentinshadow formhere,andthatincludedMarissaâs.Iftheyonly spenttenpercentoftheirtimehere,itdidnâtmatterwhatthisplacelookedlike
IswallowedhardasadozenNightlingsoldierscameintoviewandtheshadowyfigureinfrontofmematerializedagain.
I spotted a large pristine-looking meeting hall behind them, which seemed odd considering the abandoned buildings surroundingit. The meetinghall was made ofa cream-colored stone, withlarge steps leadingto opendouble doors where lightswereflickeringinside
âMarissaisexcitedyouhavefinallycome.âAmaleNightlingapproachedmeandgraspedRangerâsreins.âIâlltakehimto thebarnandmakesureheâsfed.âHewastall,withsharplypointedearsandblackpitsforeyes.
Rangerwhineddeepinhisthroat,andIhatedthatIwasforcinghimtogoagainsthisinstinctsandbehere What am I doing?
âYouâllneedtoleavebehindanyweapons,âaredheadedwomansaid
Therewasaflickerofmotiontomyright,andthenMarissamaterializedbesideme.âShe is aweapon,Sadine,âMarissa toldtheredheadandlookedupatmewithasmile,hersnakefamiliartighteningaroundherarm.âComeinside.Wehavemuch todiscussâ
Fearbloomedinmystomachasregretwashedoverme.ShouldIbehere?ButMarissawasright.I was aweapon,andif mydearoldâmotherâtriedanything,Iwouldshowherjusthowmuchmypowershadgrown Yanrictwitchedalittleonmyshoulder. âTell her you will only talk to her alone. Get these goons to step back. This looks like an ambush â Paranoia.Ididnâtblamehim.Iwasfeelingittoo.
âIâllonlyspeaktoyoualone.GetyourâŚpeopletostepback,âItoldMarissa. Shenoddedonceandthegroupdispersed,scatteringlikeroaches
âThere are hundreds more in the city,âawomancackledinmymind. Igroanedandknockedthesideofmyheadwithmyfist âStopit!âIscreamed âThevoices?âMarissaasked,coolandcalm,asifspeakingabouttheweather. Ihatedher,Ireallydid ShehadkilledAriyon,whomIâdonlysavedthroughtheaccidentalswappingofpowerswithhim, andsheâdtriedtokillSolana.ShewasevilâŚbutshewasalsolookingatmelikesheknewexactlywhatIwasgoingthrough, andthatbroughtmeaweirdcomfort.
âThemoreyoufightthem,theloudertheyâllget,âsheadvised Yanricsquawkedloudly,asifhedidnâtlikethesoundofthat.
Iscoffed âYouexpectmetohaveaconversationwiththemorsomething?â Sheraisedoneeyebrow atme,clearlyunimpressedwithmytone.âWell,theyareyourancestors,simplytryingtoadvise you.â
Igasped,peeringatherinshock.Clarkewasright.
Marissapursedherlips.âDidtheymakeyoufeellikeyouwerecrazy?Come,wehavealottocatchupon.â
Isaidnothing,onlyfollowedherinsilenceasthedarkfeelingswithinmegrew Shedematerializedintohershadowform, andIfollowedheraswewalkedtothebigmeetingbuilding.
Themomenthershadowentered,shesolidifiedbackintoherfaeformandwalkedacrosstheroom Mygazedartedaround, searchingforthreats,butIcouldseethatwewerealone.Thegiantspacewasempty,withafewmattressesonthefloor,atable withfoldingchairs,andafireplace.
Ifrowned.âYoulivehere?â
Shelaughed.âGross.Noway!Thisisourtopsidebaseofoperations.IhaveabeautifulestateintheRealmofRebirth.â IlookedatYan
âAriyon said Nightlings barely spend any time here, but I didnât think that meant they lived elsewhere,âmyfamiliarsaid. âAn estate in the Realm of Rebirth?âIaskedhim Thatjustsoundedweird shelivedwithabunchofdeadpeople ButI appreciatedthatshewasbeingforthcoming.
Shesatatoneofthechairsandcrossedherlegs,indicatingwithahandthatIdothesame.Ieyedthesnakeatherthroat, coiledlikeanecklace,andIcouldnâtgetwhatshedidtoAriyonâsparentsoutofmyhead
âYouâvedonehorriblethings,âIsaidasIsatdown,unabletojustplayalongandpretendsheandIwerealike. She shrugged âTo horrible people who think we deserve to die for the magic in our veins They treat us like we are possessedwithevil.â
âArenâtwe?âIasked She scoffed, leaning forward. âThat magic running through you is intuitive. It knows what needs to be done. There is nothingelselikeit.â
Myhearthammeredinmychestatherwords Intuitivemagicthatjustknewwhatneededtobedone? Blairâs hair. Itwasnâtmebutmymagicinstead?
âTheschool,lightingitonfire younevermeanttodothat?Themagicdid?âIasked Marissa nodded.âRightlyso!Theyall wantedme dead.Theyall thoughtIwas evil.Athingthattheir ancestors created. Thentheystoleourthrone!âsheyelled
Sothatâshow shejustifiedkillingoverahundredstudents?Idecidedsheprobablycouldnâtseereason,soIjustnodded, notwantingtoangerher.
âCanitbecontrolled?âIaskedher ItwastheentirereasonIwashere Ifshesaidno,Iwasleaving âWhywould youwantto control it? Ifyoucontrol it, youdampenthe power, which, Iamguessing, is growingstronger everydayâShelookedgreedythen,herblackeyesglistening
âCanitbecontrolled?âIpressed.âOrwillitcontinuetogrow?Thenightmares,thevoices,thenumbfeeling,depression.â Irattledoffmysymptomsandtherewasaflickerofcompassionthatcrossedherface,butonlyforafractionofasecondbefore itwasgone.
âThereisapricetopayforbeingsoblessedmagically.Ittakesatoll.â
âMarissa,Iâmnotheretogetmorepowerful.Canyouteachmetocontrolitornot?âIstood,thechairscootingbackward andslammingtothefloorasYanricsquawked.
Thesnakeatherneckuncoiled,slidingdownherarmassheglaredupatme âYes Itcanbecontrolledatagreatdetriment tothemagicitself.â
âIdonâtcareifIlivetherestofmyexistencemagicless Iwantmyoldlifeback Iwanteverythingelsetostopâ Acreepysmilecurledherlips.âIthinkwecanarrangesomething,then.Youlooktired.Whydonâtyougetsomesleepand Iâll beginthe process once youâve restedâ She pointed to one ofthe mattresses onthe floor witha blanketrolled offto the side.
âWhatprocess?âIsquintedmygaze.
Sheshookherheadatme âYouknow,youweretheonlythingIeverlovedâ Heradmissioncaughtmeoffguard.
âIthinkIlovedClarke,butitwasclearhewasjustusingmetomakehimselffeelbetter Butyou,youwouldbemyminime.YouwouldknowexactlywhatitfeltliketobeaBane.ABanewithsomuchpower,peoplefearedyou.â
âItsucks,âItoldher
Shenoddedonce.âItdoes.Butnotforlong.âShestoodthenaswell.âGetsomerest.Iâllbebacklater.â
Shepoofedintoshadowsandzoomedoutthedoor.
âI donât like this I think we should go â Yanriceyedtheexits Iwaslookingatthebed,myeyelidsgrowingheavierbytheminute. âShe says she can help us, Yan.â
âShe didnât really answer you when you asked how Something doesnât feel right with her,âYanricsaid Whatwashetalkingabout?Hewastheonewhoagreedweshouldcomehere.
âWell, yeah, sheâs evil and hates everyone in The Gilded City, but she knew what the voices were She knew the magic was intuitive. She knows all about what we â ve been through because she went through it too.â
âIâll be back. Iâm going to follow her.â Yanrictransformedintoblackshadowsandleftthroughthewall.
Didheseriouslyjustleaveme? Sketchy, paranoid bird
Iwalkedover tothemattress onthefloor andsat.Iwaitedaminute,thenanother.Yanricstill wasnâtback,andmyeyes werebeginningtodriftshut Iwasjustgoingtolaybackforasecond Yanricwouldwakemeupwhenhereturned,andifhe reallypressedtheissue,IcouldgetRangerandweâdgo.Wecouldthinkofsomethingelse.ButIreallyfeltlikeMarissaknew whatwasgoingonwithmeandmightbeabletohelpmefeelnormalagain.
ThesecondIclosedmyeyes,Iwassuckedintoasurprisinglybeautifuldream.Ariyonwasholdingmygaze,strokinghis thumbacrossmybottomlip.
âComehome,âhewhisperedagainstmymouth
Iawoke toa sharppainonmywrist As myeyelids flew open,hands clampedaroundmyarms andlegs,pinningme down Agonyeruptedalongmyspineasmycurseignited.
Iwassogroggywithsleep,ittookmeasecondtorealizewhatthefaewasgoingon.Ipeereddownatthesourceofthe sharppainonmywristandscreamedwhenIsaw Marissa drinking fromit Her lips were wrappedaroundmyskinandthe copperysmellofbloodfilledtheairasslurpingnoisesreachedmyears.
No
Itriedtoyankmywristfromher,butIwasimmobilized.Therewasapresenceinmymind,slitheringaroundlikeasnake.I wasnâtalone Itfeltlikeaheavyblanketweighedmedown âStay still,â Marissacommandedmementally.
PurepanicrippedthroughmewhenIrealizedshewascontrollingmelikeshehadMasterHart.Myfreewillbeingtaken fromme was about the most terrifying thing I could think of The pain of being held down, skin touching my skin, ripped throughmybodylikeafire.
âYanric!âIscreamed,pullingformypoweronlytofinditdulledsomehow
âIcanâtsuppressherpowermuchlonger!âafemaleNightlingwithlong,brownhairshoutedfromsomewherenexttome. Suppress my power?!
The gulpingnoises comingfromMarissa were makingme nauseous, as I felt the lifeblood leavingme, dizziness inits wake.IhadthoughtupahundreddifferentscenariosofwhatMarissawoulddotome.Feedingonmybloodwasneverinany ofthem FeelingMarissaâsholdovermeweaken,Itooktheopportunitytofightback,buckingwildlylikeafishoutofwateras Ipulledformypowerandmypalmsheated.
Thepain,itwastoomuch Atleastfour peopleweretouchingmewithfull-oncontactandnotlettinggo,anditmademe feellikeIwasburningalive.Iscreamed,butbarelyanysoundcameout.Itwasasifmybodydidnâtevenhavetheenergyto shout.
âGetoffofme,âIwhimpered.
Panic fullyconsumed me then, and Igasped ina lungful ofair. Ifocused onwhere mygaze naturallywas and did what Clarkehadtaughtme,pullingblackshadowsfromalongtheceilinguntil theydancedclosertome,drippingdownthewalls The brown-haired Nightling above me screamed and grabbed her head as if she were in pain. Something snapped then. Whatever power she and Marissa held over me broke inthatmoment, and Iexploded withmagic Purple fire shotfrommy palms, scorchingthe side ofMarissaâs face. She shrieked, leapingoffofme witha blood-tinged grin. The other Nightlings holdingmeletgo,andItriedtositupbutfoundmyselftooweakandintoomuchpain.Mybodyjerkedwiththeaftershocksof thecurseasblackdotsdancedattheedgesofmyvision.
No. You will not pass out right now, Fallon, I told myself, trying to fight the dizziness washing over me. I felt drunk, wobbly,fuzzy
The blackshadows Iâdconjuredretreated,tooweaktofullyharness mypower.Ipulledfor itagain,fightingthroughthe painasMarissastoodbeforemewearingamaniacalgrin
âOh,Daughter,thatwaseverythingIhaddreameditwouldbeandmore.âShelookeddownatherhandsasifseeingthem for the first time, rollingthemover to studythe veins onthe top. I blinked rapidly, wonderingif I was seeingthings. Her normallyblackeyes and general undead lookwere gone Her eyes were a richemerald greennow, her skinless pale, her cheeksrosyandflushed.
âDiditwork?âthebrunetteNightlingsaidasIconvulsedinagonyagain Marissatookinadeepbreathandthenexhaledslowly.âItdid.âShegrinned.âIamboundbymyshadow formnomore. Theprophesywastrue Herbloodisthekeytogivingusourbodiesbackâ
Agarbled gasp ripped frommythroat as I tried againto stand but was overcome withdizziness. What did this mean? Marissawasboundbyshadowsnomore?Like,herbodywasreborn?Whatdiditmean?
Shehadtakentoomuchfromme toomuchblood MyheartfeltlikeitwasbeatingbetweenmyearsandIcouldnâtthink straight.WherewasYanric?
âI want to go nextâ The brunette stepped closer to me, but Marissa threw out her hand and a rope of black shadow wrappedaroundthegirlâswaist,pinninghertothespot.
âTouchher,andIâllthrowyouintotheBottomlessPit!âMarissagrowled âStickwiththeplan Iwillgetonthethroneand thenusethenecklaceSolanaiscurrentlywearing,asqueen,tounbindtherestofyou.Ifyoudrinktoomuch,shewilldie,and thenwherewillwebe?âShelookedatthegroupofhungryNightlings,andonebyonetheynodded.
Maybeitwasthebloodloss,butmybrainwassluggishinprocessingeverythingshesaid AllIknewwasthatifonemore persondrankfromme,IwasleavingthisrealmandstandingbeforeTheGrim,becausetherewasbarelyenoughbloodinmy bodytokeepmeconscious
Lighthelpme.Imanagedtositupandrollontomyknees,fightingtheurgetopassout.
Ishouldhaveknownsheâdtrickme Iwassostupidforcominghere HadshehurtYanric?Wherewashe?
Marissaâs eyes widened, thenshe grabbed her head suddenlybefore lettingloose witha guttural wail of pain. Asmall trickle of blood left her nose, and myhead whipped toward the opendoorwayjust intime to see Ariyonstep inside with Yanriconhisshoulder
Ihadnâtthoughtmyheartcouldpossiblybeatanyfaster,butitdidatthesightofhim.Heworethefullbattlearmorofthe Queenâs Royal Army,andhewas grinning âWhatever youdid,Marissa,Icanfeel your energynow,whichmeans Icanhurt you,âhegrowled,sneeringather.
Marissafelltoherknees,morebloodtricklingfromhernoseasherfaceturnedblue.
Holy Fae, he was tearing her apart from the inside out, and all I could do was watch in fascination. Then the room explodedintochaos.
TheNightlingspresentpoofedintoshadowandheadedforAriyon,butYanricmetthemhead-on Myfamiliartransformed intoshadowsandtookonthestreaksofblackzippingthroughtheair,crashingintothemandminglingintoangryballs. Awindowtomyrightbroke,andastreakofredhairburstintotheroomandbeganlaunchingavolleyoffireballs Eden.
Iwantedtoburstintosobsatthesightofmybestfriend,buteverythingwastoohard.Thinking.Standing.Feeling.
âThey donât love you for who you are Only we know your true self,â oneofthevoicesinsidemyheadsaid.
Another window broke, and thenanother, and suddenlythe roomwas filled withnearlyeveryone Icared about. Ayden, MasterClarke,Hayes
AriyonsidesteppedtheballofshadowsandstoodbeforeMarissa,wholookedneardeath.Unimaginableamountsofblood coveredhershirt Herlipsandfaceweretingedbluewithalackofoxygen,andsheclawedatherthroat,desperatelyinsearch ofairasshelookedupatAriyoninshock.
âYouhavenoideawhatIâmcapableof.âAriyonspokedownather.
Awaveofremnantpainshookme,andIhadtogriptheedgesofthemattresstokeepfrompassingout
Oneoftheshadowsseparatedfromtheballandformedintothebrunettewoman.Aknifeappearedinherhand,aimedfor Ariyonâsback,andIusedeveryounceofstrengthIpossessedtoscream âAriyon,behind!â
Hespun,catchingthewomanâshandmidair,andthenmyvisionwasblottedoutwithdarkness IthoughtIhadfainted,butI wasstillconscious weâdbeenmagicallyplungedintodarkness.
Ipulledformypower,butitwasliketryingtoreachintomud.Everythingwasthickandsluggishinmybody.Marissahad nearlydrainedmewhensheâdfedfromme,anditbrokemyheart Somewheredeepdowninside,Ihadstillexpectedhertobe adecentperson.Amother.ThiswasthelasttimeIâdeverunderestimateherandtheevilshewascapableof.
TheroomflaredwithlightasEdenandAydenusedtheirfiretoilluminatethespace,andIwasbothrelievedandannoyed toseethatMarissaandherNightlingsweregone.
Ariyonstrodeacrossthespaceuntilhestoodbeforeme,butIcouldnâtmeethisgaze Iwassoashamed Ihadlefthim Iâd lefteveryone.IhadlitBlaironfireandyettheyallstillcametomyrescue. IsuspectedthiswasbecauseofYanric.
âWhen I left last night to follow Marissa, I heard her plans When I came back to wake you, they had put some kind of sleep spell over you. I went for help right away, â myfamiliarsaidfromhisplaceonEdenâsshoulderassherubbedhisneck fondly Theyhadaspecialbond,andIcouldnâtimagineithadbeeneasytobeawayfromeachotherforamonth
âFallon,lookatme.âAriyonreachedupandgraspedthebottomofmyface,tiltingmychinuptomeethissteel-grayeyes. Histouch,sosoftandsafe,madethenumbnessinsideofmeflickerfortheslightestmoment.Forasplitsecond,Iremembered whatjoyfeltlike andlove.
AndIwantedthatpartofmyselfback.
MybottomlipshookasImethisgaze,preparingforhimtochastisemeforwhatIâddone.Ortotellmewewouldfigureit outtogether,knowingfull well therewasnocurefor whatailedme.Inadarkmoment,Iwonderedifonlydyingwouldcure thislonely,numbfeelinginsideofme Maybethatwastheonlysolution
âFallonBane,whenIsaidIlovedyou,Imeantit,âAriyongrowled.âAll ofyou.Nomatterwhat.âThetopsofhishands glowedasthemarkingsswirled,andhishealingenteredmybody,chasingawaythedizziness,pain,andcloudymind Ireachedupandgraspedhishands,restingmineover his.âIâmnottheFallonyouremember anymore,âItoldhimsadly. âSheâsdyingâTearsslippedfromthecornersofmyeyesandtrickledoverhishands âIcanâtfeelheranymore Idonâtknow whothisnewgirlis,butIdonâtrecognizeher.â
Edenswallowedasobfromacrosstheroomatmywords,andAydenswoopedintocomforther.Ihadnâtmeanttobeso dramatic, but Iwanted themto know what Iwas dealingwith Ineeded themto know thatIdidnâtrecognize myselfinside anymore.Thisdarkmagichadtakenupsomuchroominsideme,Iwasnolongerme.Iwas it.
Ariyonfrowned,nodding âIknowwhatneedstobedone,andIdonâtwantyoutoarguewithmeaboutit,âhecommanded Iwantedtopullawayfromhim,tonotallowhimtohealme,whichwouldtaketimeoffofhislife.Theworldwasabetter placewithAriyoninit,andIwantedtheworldtohavehimforaslongaspossible
Butasheheldme,Ifeltsomeofthestorm cloudsdisperseandmymindclearedforthefirsttimeinamonth.SoIselfishlyallowedhimtocontinuepouringhealinginto measIrobbedhimofhislife.
OldFallonwouldhaveinsistedhestop NewFallonselfishlylethim
âWhat?âIsaidwithbarelyanyemotionatall.Whateverhisplan,itwouldnâtwork.Nothingwasgoingtostopthismagic from growing inside of me I was a Bane, and this curse meant that going insane with madness and hopelessness was inevitable.Itwastentimesworsethanfeelingpainwhentouched.AtleastthenIhadfelt something.NowIwasjustanempty shell,disappearingeventomyself.
âYouaregoingtoswitchourpowersagain,âAriyonsaid,andIgasped.âYouaregoingtogivemethedarkness,andIâm goingtocarryitforyou.âHesmiledsoradiantlythenthatIwantedtocapturethemomentintimeforever,themomentAriyon proposedsacrificinghimselfforme ItwasthetruesttestamenttolovethatIâdeverknown AndonethatIwouldneverallow Ishookmyheadandleanedforwardtopress a kiss onhis lips.He moanedintomymouth,andIpulledawayfromhim, wipingmyeyes
âThisismyburdentobear,Ariyon.Iwouldneverdragyouintothedarknessinmyplace,âItoldhim,andthenfullypulled away,cuttingoffthehealingmagichewasgivingme.IsearchedtheroomforMasterClarkeandfoundhimwatchinguswith interest.Icouldseethewheelsturninginhismind.Hesquintedoneeyeslightlywhenhewaslostinthought.
âIloveyouall,âIannouncedwithashakybreath.âButIneedtoleaveandgosomeplaceremotetoletthisplayout.â
âNo!âEdenshouted,steppingforward âYouwill not gothroughthisaloneâ
ThoughAriyonhadhealedme,atleastpartially,Istill neededtomakeupfor theloss ofbloodthatMarissahadtaken.I wasstillslightlyweakinthekneesandtired,butIcouldfeelmypowerhadreturned Ipulledmymagicintotheroomanddark shadowsdancedalongthewallslikeghosts.
âYouhavenoideawhatIcandonow,Eden,howmuchharmIcouldbringtoallofyouifIgotoutofcontrol,âItoldheras shestaredupattheshadowsinfear ThenIshookmyhandstoexpelthem,andtheydisappeared âIâmnotleaving.âAriyoncrossedhisarmsdefiantly.
âNeitheramIâAydenstoodnexttohisbrotherandlookedatmewithsomuchcompassion,Icouldonlyshakemyhead Edendidnâtneedtospeak;shejuststeppedupbesidethemsilently,andthenfinally,HayessidledupnexttoEden. Theyweresostupid Whywouldnâttheyjustgo?
âWaitaminute.âMaster Clarkeenteredthespace,andInoticedfor thefirsttime,hehadacutalonghischeek,probably fromtheNightlings.Hishandswerewrappedingauzefrommyburninghim,andIcouldnâtbeartolookathim.âAriyon,what yousaidabouttakingthedarknessfromherwasverynoblebutwouldonlyputusinthesameposition,exceptitwouldbeyou whoweweretryingtosave.â
Oh Good Iwasgladheagreedwithme
âBut what if she onlygave youhalf?â Master Clarke stepped closer again. âAnd what if she tookhalf of your healing power?â
âNo.âIbackedupastep,butAriyonâseyeslitup.
âYes!ForamomentintheRealmofRebirth,whenFallonwasswitchingourpowersback,wewerestuckwithhalfeach. Itâspossibleâ
Atinythreadofhopewoveitswayintomyheart.IfAriyontookhalfofthedarkness,Imightbeabletobreatheagain,to feel,tobeoldFallon ButIwouldnâtaskhimtodothat,totakeonthismadnesswithme Whatifwebothwentdark?
As if he read mythoughts, Ariyonstrode confidentlyforward, reachingout to cup myface inhis hands once more and causingafull-bodyflushofheattorunthroughme.ThatacheofdesireIhadthoughtwasdeadroaredtolifewithhistouch.
âWecanbeatthis.Together,âhepromised,notlettinggoofmyface.
âButyourMavenhealing.Itwillonlybehalfasstrong.Youmayneversaveanotherlifeagain,âItoldhim.
Hemighthealsmallwounds,butfightingtheGrimforalifewouldnâtbepossiblewithonlyhalfofhispower. Henodded.âFallon,fromthisdayforward,ifyourlifeistheonlyoneIeversave,itwillbeworthit.â
Myheartpinchedathisdeclaration âMyBanefamilypowerswilltrytoovertakeyou,âIsaid,tryingtoreasonwithhim âLetthemtry,âhegrowled.âMyhealingpowerswillkeepthematbayinbothofus.Iâmsureofit.Donâtyousee,Fallon? WeweremadeforeachotherâThen,justashehadinmydream,heranthepadofhisthumbovermybottomlip âAwww,âEdencooed.Ihadforgottenwewerenâtalone.
âYouraunt âIsaid,feeblygraspingforanyreasonnottodothis
âForgetmyaunt!Dotheswitchandletâsgohome,âAriyonpleadedwithme.
Home tomydad,TheGildedCity,anormallife.
Ipeeredaroundtheroomatmypeople,theoneswhoshowedupinmydarkesthourandrefusedtoleave,andIknewthatif Ididnâtdothis,theywouldstayontherunwithmeforeveranditwouldleadthemintogreaterdanger.Iknew thatifwedid that,oneday,Iwouldlosecontrolandhurtthem
YanricflewfromEdenâsshoulderandlandedonAriyonâssohewasfacingme.
âMaybe this was what Emmeric saw You went dark for a time but then you end up saving everyone â
TheEaldorfaeâspredictionhadbeenconstantlyonmymind.IcouldnâtpiecetogetherhowIwouldgodarkbutalsosave theentireGildedCityfromMarissaandherNightlings,butmaybethiswashow.
Iheldmybreath,prayingtotheLightthatthiswasnâtamistake,thatbymakingthischoice,noharmwouldcometoAriyon Iachedtofeellikemyselfagain,tochaseawaythedark,numbballofapathythathadformedinsideofme.
Reluctantly,InoddedandreleasedthebreathIâdbeenholding Ariyonsmiledsweetlyanddroppedhishandstograspmine.
TherewassomecomfortinEmmericâsfuturesightthatIwoulddiewithintheyear.ThatmeantAriyonwouldonlyhaveto putupwiththisforashorttime.
âIâmgoingtokeepwatchoutside,incasetheycomeback,âAydensaid,andHayesnoddedinagreementastheybothleft. âLastchancetobackout,âIwarnedAriyon âNever,âhebreathed,andIclosedmyeyes.
ItriedtorememberthelasttimeIâdtradedourpowers,andthevisionofthefaucetwasbroughtintomymindâseye âThis will never work. Youâll only infect him too, and youâll both go mad,â oneofthevoicesofmyancestorssaid. Or it will work, and youâll be silenced forever, Itold her, and the darkness flared to life inside me as ifitknew itwas abouttobeexpelled.
ImaginingAriyonâspowerasabuttery-yellowlight,Iopenedthefaucetandfeltitrushintome,splinteringthroughthevoid like the sun Then I imagined another faucet of power opening into him and released some of the dark power that was consumingme.
Ariyongaspedandmyeyesflewopen âAreyouokay?âIasked.
Hiseyesfilledwithunshedtearsasheswallowedhard.âThisiswhatyouâvebeencarrying?â
Inodded,andhesteppedcloserbutdidnâtreleasemyhands,restinghisheadonmyshoulder,nuzzlingmyneck For the firsttime ina longtime, Ifeltthe numbness leave me. Ariyonâs healingmagic flooded mybody, breakingup the darknesslikeoldcobwebs,andIpeereddownatmyhandstoseethatonlyoneofthemhadtheMavenhealer marks ThenI lookedatthetopofhisandsawthathehadonlyoneaswell.
Inmymindâs eye,Iturnedoffthetaps,keepingus bothinthis in-betweenstate,wherewesharedpowers Iletgoofhis hands,andhisarmswrappedaroundmeasheheldme.Littlebylittle,theemotionsthatIâdbeenmissingforweekscreptback intomyheart love,admiration,longing,happiness.
Ilaughed,asoundsoforeigntomyears,itmademesad IcouldnâtrememberthelasttimeIhadtrulylaughed
Ariyonpulledbackwithasmileandplacedaquickkissonmylips.âIâmsorryyouhadtocarrythisalone.â
âIâmsorryyouhavetohelpcarryitnow,âItoldhim Itwas still there,inthebackground,hidingbehindAriyonâs magic fromtheHouseofLightandEther.
âBehonestâHelookedatme âIsthisthemostromanticthingaguyhaseverdoneforyou?â
Laughterpealedoutofme,andhegraspedmywaist,liftingmeoffthegroundandbackintohisarms.Joybledintomysoul, givingmelifeinthatmoment,andIcouldhardlybelieveit.Itworked.
âYan, how are you feeling?â IaskedmyfamiliarasAriyonsetmedown Iwassuddenlyworriedthatmybirdwouldnotbe fixed.Yes,wewereconnected,buthedidnâtshareAriyonâspowerslikeIdid.
âFeeling better and ready to go home â Hisvoicesoundedbrighter,andIsaggedinrelief âYanâsbettertoo,âItoldeveryone.
âThanktheLight.Weshouldgo.Marissawillcomeback,âMasterClarkeannounced.
Igrabbedmyglovesandmypackandtookonelastlookatthedarkroom.Istillwasnâtsurewhatexactlyhadgonedown here,butIfeltsomuchbetter,somuchlikeoldFallon,thatevenwiththeprophecyfromEmmeric,Iwashopefulthatwhatever
WegrabbedRanger andfledquicklyonhalfadozenhorses WerodefastandhardinthedirectionofTheGildedCityfor a few hoursbeforeslowingtogiveourhorsestimetorest.Ariyontookthattimetoheal MasterClarkeâsburnedhands.Ittook longerthannormal,andtheydidnâtfullyheal,buttheblisterswentdownandthepainwasgone.Therewasjustabitofangry redskinleft
IcouldnâtbelieveAriyonhadgivenuphispowertosavelivesforme.IcouldnâtbelieveIwasgoinghomeandthatIfelt somewhatnormalagain Itwasalltoomuchtoprocess,especiallysinceIâdspentthelastmonthnumb Nowallofmyemotions werehittingmeatonce.
Oncewewereridingagainataslow trot,MasterClarkepulledhismareupalongsideRanger âWhathappenedinthere, Fallon?HowwasAriyonabletohurtMarissa?âheasked.
Ariyonanswered.âIcouldfeelherenergy,likeIdowiththeliving.Somethingâschanged.â Ichewedmybottomlip âIâmnotsureexactly,butshe drankfrommeâ Ourlittlegroupcollectivelygaspedandshameburnedthroughme.
âShe said myblood worked That some prophesywas true, and she was â I paused as I tried to remember the exact wording.ââŚunboundfromtheshadowsnow,thatIwasthekeytotheNightlingsgettingpermanentbodies.â
ThecolorleachedfromMasterClarkeâsface
âShe said she could unbind the other Nightlings with the necklace Solana wearsâŚand my blood,â I finished, feeling ashamedeventhoughIhadnâtdoneanythingwrong.
âThatâshowshedoesit,âMasterClarkebreathed âThatâshowtheygetpermanentbodiesâ Werodeforanotherhourinsilence,allofuswrappedupinourownthoughts.
âDoesyourauntknowyoucametogetme?âIfinallyaskedAriyon HesharedalookwithAyden,andIknewwhathewasgoingtosaywasnâtgood. âYes,âheanswered,buttherewashesitationinhisvoice.
âJusttellme,âIsaid,knowingSolanahadnodoubtbeenpissedwhensheheardthatbothofherheirswantedtojumpinto harmâswayfortheBanegirl.
Ariyoncleared his throat just as the sound of horse hooves surrounded us I spun, glancingat the flame emblemonthe breastplateofthenowtwodozenGildedCityRoyalGuardswhoencircledus.
âSheforbidus Sowesnuckout,âAriyonfinished
âYoucouldhavebeenkilled!âSolanaâsvoiceechoedinthedarknessofthenightandwealljumped.
Theguardsparted,andtheforestglowedasQueenSolanarodeuponherstallionlookingmadderthanIâdeverseenher. Evenso,myheartsoftenedtowardher.Somehow,Ialways hada softspotfor thatwoman.Maybe itwas myownlackofa mothergrowingup.MaybeIwasalwayslookingforanolderfemaleinmylife.Maybeitwasthewayshefiercelyprotected herpeople,includingAriyonandAyden Irespectedheralot Evenwhenshehatedme
âBothstillalive.Alliswell,Auntie.âAydengaveheracherrysmile,everthepeacemaker. Solanaâsgazesnappedtomeandnarrowed ThenhereyesflickedtoAriyonandhishands,thenbacktomeandmygloved hands.
âTakeoffyourgloves,âshecommanded.
âAuntSol âAydeninterjected,butsheshuthimupwithaglare Her bodywas literallyglowingas ifshe were emittingsunlight, and Iknew this would have to be dealtwithsooner or later
I pulled the gloves off to reveal the Maven mark on the top of my hand, and she growled, looking at Ariyon with disappointment âIsthisajoketoyou?Isthesafetyofyourpeople,yourbrother,ajoke?âsheaskedhim
IbristledatSolanaâsreactiontowhatAriyonhaddoneforme,thoughIwasnâtcompletelysurprised. Hesattaller,glaringather.âNo,itâsnot.IsmyloveforFallonajoketoyou?WouldyounotdothesameforBastian?â
Hercheeksreddenedasshelookedaroundattheguardspresent Bastianwasthequeenâslover,aguardwhomIâdsaved fromcertaindeath.
Solanalookedatme âWehadadeal Youstartgoingdark,youtellmeâ âWhatwouldyouhavedone?âIaskedher.
âLockedyouupinBaneManor,asagreedon,âshestated âWheremypowerswouldeventuallygrow,myfather wouldnever leavemyside,andIâdenduphurtingthoseIlove,âI toldher.
She nodded âIwill see to itthatyour father is removed fromthe premises and notallowed back Justgive Ariyonhis powersandthenIâllescortyoutoBaneManor.â
Ithitmethen,whyshewasglowing,whysheâdbroughttwodozenguardswithher âYouthinkIâmgoingtohurtyou?âIcouldnâtkeepthesadnessfrommyvoice.ShewaslituplikeatreeatWinterSolstice becauseshewasreadytoattackme!Inherdefense,sheprobablyhadnâtknownwhatshapeshewouldfindmein âLastIheard,youlitBlairCrawfordâshaironfirewithyourmind,âsheshotback. Shamerushedthroughme.âFairenough.ButIâmfeelingnormalnow,âIadmitted,andthenreachedforAriyonâshand. Hegraspedmineandsmiledatmeinashowofsupport
âWearenâtchangingpowersback,AuntSolana.IâminthiswithFallonuntiltheend,âAriyondeclared.
âWeallare,âAydensaid,pipingup
âYep,âEdenpoppedthe p. âMetoo,âHayestoldher.
Solanapracticallyexplodedwithragethen.Her jaw set,theveinsinher neckbulged,andthelightglowingoffher body grewbrighter.âFallonBane,youstopthisfoolishnessrightnow!GivemynephewbackhispowersorIâll â âYouâllwhat?âAriyonasked,droppingmyhandashekickedthesidesofhishorsesothatitrushedatQueenSolanaheadon.
TheentireRoyalArmysurgedforwardafewfeetasSolanalooked,wide-eyed,indisbeliefathernephew âIâvenevertakenyouforastupidwoman.Iâvealwayslookeduptoyouforyourstrengthandintelligence.Sobelieveme nowwhenItellyouthatitwouldbe very stupidtoeverthreatenFallonagain.Iloveher.AsIloveyou.AndIwonâthesitateto protecther.Evenfromyou,âAriyonannounced.
Theairwaschargedwithtension,everyoneholdingtheirbreath.TheareaaroundusdarkenedasSolanaâspowersdimmed. Shelookedathernephewwithsomuchhurt,Iwantedtotearacrossthemeadowandhugher
IalsowantedtograbAriyonandkisshimwithoutevercomingupforairafterheâdjustspokenupformelikethat. âButshecouldhurtyou,me,allofus,âSolanasaid,butshesoundeddefeated Ariyonhelduphishand,theonewithnomark.âNotnow.Now,webothcarrythedarkness,andIwonâtletanyonegethurt. Ineedyoutogetoverthisvendettaagainsther.EitherthatorFallonandIleaverightnow.Wegomakealifeinanothertown andyouneverseeusagainâ
SolanaandIgaspedatthesametime. Hewoulddothat?Forme?
âYouwouldnât.âShesaiditsosoftly,Ibarelyheardher.
Ariyonreachedoutandgrabbedherhandsinhis âIwould,âhewhisperedback Awaveofemotionscrashedintomethen.WhateverfeelingsofrejectionIcarriedfrombeingleftatthegatesofIsariahas achildhadmostlyhealedwhenmyfatheradoptedme.Butsomehadremained.Thoseremnantswereobliteratednow,inthis moment,whenthePrinceofTheGildedCitytoldhisaunthewouldleaveher,hisinheritance,allofit forme
Sheclearedherthroatandnodded.âLetâsgohome,âQueenSolanasaidloudlytoeveryone. âWithFallon?âAriyonprodded Shelookedatme,defeated.âWithFallon.â
ReliefmeltedthroughoutmylimbsasIthoughtofseeingmyfatheragain MasterClarkegavemeathumbs-up,andweallsetoffforTheGildedCitytogether.NeverinamillionyearshadIthought Iâdbegoingback.
WE ENTERED thecityinthedeadofnight Onlyafewguardswereout,andthatwasforthebest IwasnâtsureIwantedto faceanyofTheGildedCitycitizensrightnow.ThequeenandherRoyalGuardsescortedusallthewaytoBaneManor.Master Clarkebrokeoffhalfway,toheadtohishouse,andtoldmewewouldcatchuptomorrow Thereseemedtobealittlesadness
insideofMasterClarkewhenheleft,andIwouldbelyingifIdidnâtadmitthatIfeltitabittoo.Ourmonthtogetheroutinthe abandoned cabinhad bonded us a traumatic bond buta bond nonetheless. Abond thatwas, maybe, like a buddingfatherdaughterrelationship Nowwewouldgobacktoouroldlives teacherandstudent
WhenwereachedBanemanor,Ariyon,Ayden,Eden,andHayesvowednottoleavemyside,claimingwewouldhavea sleepover Iwas exhausted yetexhilarated atthe same time After notfeelingemotions for so long, joyand happiness were bubblingoverinsideme.
âWewilltalkaboutthisinthemorningandmakesomegroundrules,âQueenSolanatoldme Ijustnodded,gratefulshehadnâtcagedmerightthenandthere.
Aftersheleft,Iknockedonthedoor.Ihadleftwithoutmykey,andIhopedmydadwouldnâtbetoostartledwhenhe Thedoorrippedopen,andmyfatherstoodtherelookingalert,likeheâdstayedupwaiting âFallon!âHisvoicecaughtas hereachedformycoveredshoulders.
âWetoldhimweweregoingtogetyou,âEdensaidfrombehindme TearsfilledmyeyesasIlookedathim.Myfatherlookedunkempt,withafullbeardanddarkcirclesunderhiseyes,andI realizedthatleavingwithouthimmusthavehurthimsobadly
âAreyouokay?âHefranticallyglancedovermybodyasifsearchingforwounds.HiseyesfilledwithtearswhenInodded. âSheâsfine.âAriyonsteppedupandsqueezedmydadâsshoulder.âIbroughtherhomelikeIsaidIwould.â
MyfatherdroppedmyhandsandpulledAriyonintoahug,andmythroatconstricted âIâmsothankfulforyou,son,âmydadmurmuredinAriyonâsear,andIlookedatEdentoseeshewastearingup. Isawnowthatmyleavinghadleftamarkonallofthem,andtheguiltofitwormeditswayintomychest âIâmsorryIleft.Ihadnootherchoice.Iwas â
âItâs okay.â Edenstepped up beside me and tookmygloved hand inhers, givingit a hard squeeze. âYoudonât need to explain.Weârejustsogladyouârehome.â
âIsanyoneelsehungry?âHayesblurtedout,andweallburstintolaughter.
MyfatherpulledawayfromAriyon,wipingathiseyes,andshrugged âItâsthemiddleofthenight,butIcouldmakesome breakfast.â
Withthat,weallfiledintothekitchen Mydadturnedontheoven,gettingintohiselement Itwasafarcryfromhavingto rationmeatandbreadinthesamemeal.Withinanhour,mydadhadbakedcheddarbiscuits,andmadeahugepileofscrambled eggsandawholeplateofsausages.
EveryonetradedstoriesaboutwhatIhadmissedwhileIwasgone.IquicklylearnedthatQueenSolanahadtheentirecity wallreinforcedwithamagicalbarrierthatdetectedNightlingsandsoundedanalarmwhentheybrokethrough.Theschooland all the richhomes onthe EastSide had builtunderground bunkers thatwere magicallylined to keep Nightlings out, evenin theirshadowform.
âWhatabouttheWesties?âIasked Edenchuckled.âWeâllbethefirsttodieinanattack.â
ShewasjokingâŚbutnotreally.Anditwasnâtfunny.
âSpeakingoftheWestSideâHayespipedupwithamouthfullofsausage âTheâicecreamâshopisthriving QueenSolana evenstopsbytogetascoopandleavesahugetiptokeepeverythingrunning.â
Ismiledatthat,rememberinghow sheâdactedwhenshehadstoppedbytoseeAvisinher regular shopontheEastSide andboughtabunchofhertinctures,leavingabigtipthattimetoo.Solanawasgoodatheart.
âAreyoudoingalotofhealings?Arepeoplegettingbetter?âIaskedeagerly Ithadbeenpartlymydreamtogetabetter healingclinicgoingontheWestSide.IwassadIwasnâttheretoseeit.
Edennodded.âHundreds.Moraleisupwithinthecity,andeveryoneisdoinggreat.Theclinicactuallyhastimetoseethe seriouscasesâ
Thatwasarelief.âIsâŚAvisokay?âTheguiltwasback.Iâdlefthertoo. Edennodded âShemissesyou Sheâllbethrilledyouârebackâ
Itwasalottotakein,Marissafeedingoffofmeandsomehow now havingaforeverbody,Ariyontakinghalfmypower andgivingmehis,allthenewsaboutwhathadhappenedherewhileIwasgone Iyawned,suddenlyexhausted,andeveryonenodded.
âLetâscrash.âHayesleanedbackandtappedhistummy,whichwasnowbloated.
âIcalltheredbed!âEdenpoppedup
âNo,thatâsthemostcomfortableone!âAydensaid,frowning.
Ipeeredatthem,confused Whatwastheredbed?Andwhydiditsoundliketheyhadsleptoverherebefore?
âComeon.Iâllshowyou.âEdenpulledmyhand,andIfollowedhertoalargeroomonthefirstfloor.Itusedtobeagiant ballroom.Whensheopenedthedoors,myheartpinched.Inthecenteroftheroomwerefourbeds,alllinedinaneatrow.Each bedhadcurtainsforprivacyhangingfromtheirfourtallposts.Onehadaredcomforter,oneblue,oneblack,andonegray.At thefarwallweremapsandnotesstucktoitinEdenâshandwriting.
âYourdadkindofâŚbrokedownwhenyouleft.Sowestartedsleepingovertokeephimcompanyanddoresearch.Then, weallstartedlookingforyou,anditkindofstuck.Westayherethreenightsaweekandyourdadcooks.Itâslikeareallycool dormâ
Iputmyhandsovermyfacethen,hidingtheshameIfeltforcausingthemalltogothroughthis.
âHey,itâsokayâEdenpeeledmyfingersbackonebyone,forcingmetolookather Ihadmissedherwild,red,curlyhair andintensestare.Herhonestyandlaugh.Herloyalty.
âIjustwishIcouldhugyou,Fallon Iwassoworriedâ
Inodded,pullingmyhandsdown.âThanksforunderstanding,andthanksforbeingsuchagoodfriend.â Hayesrushedpastusthen,sprintingtotheredbedanddivingin.
Edengrowled âHey!NotfairâShetoreafterhim
Ismiledatthebanter,andmyheartwasfilled.Itfeltsogoodtofeelagain,likethedarkcloudshadliftedfrommymindand Iwasbacktobeingme
âGladyouâreback.âAydensqueezedmyhandashepassedby,butIgrippedhishard,yankinghimtoastop. Ifacedhim,onthevergeoftears âIdonâtdeservesuchaloyalfriend Thankyou,Aydenâ Hesmiledthen,adevastatinglyhandsomesmilethatstill sometimes threw me,seeingas hewasidentical inlooks tomy boyfriend.
âOkay, thatâs enoughhand-holding,â Ariyonbroke injokingly, and Aydenlaughed, droppingmygloved hand as Ariyon cuppedthesidesofmyface.
âAreyoujealous?âIaskedhim,referringtomyhand-holdingwithAyden âAtinybit.Imean,heisyourex,andwedosharethesameface.â Igrinnedatthat.âAndheisnicerthanyou.â
âHey!âHepokedmeplayfullyintheribsandlaughterpealedoutofme.
âLight,Imissedthatlaugh.âHeleanedhisforeheadagainstmineandmybodyheatedattheproximity.
Inuzzledhisneck,pepperingitwithkissesbeforemovinguptohisear âThankyouforsavingmeâ âAlways,âhemurmuredback,andkissedmegoodnight. IhadnodoubtthattheLighthadmadeAriyonjustforme
AFTER WISHING allofmyfriendsgoodnightandapprovingYanricâsrequesttosnugglewithEden,Iwenttomyroomand dugthroughmyclothes.MydadhadworriedaboutmetheentiretimeIwasgone,andIfeltawfulaboutthat,soIwasgoingto dosomethingwe usedtodowhenIwas a kid Itfeltprettystupidbutalsogood,andIknew he neededitas muchas Idid Slickingmyhairintoabun,Ithrewmytravelingcloakonoverlongpantsandmadesuremysocksandgloveswerecovering me IhadAriyonâshealingpowersnow,andifmydadaccidentlytouchedme,thensobeit Iwouldheal Iwantedtohugmy dad,andIdidnâtwanttouse the tincture thatEmmeric hadmade for me justyet.Iwas savingthe special potionthatwould suspendmycurseandallowmetotouchmylovedonesforanotherday Paddingdownthehallway,Iknockedonhis door.Heopenedit,lookingconcerned.Whenhesaw meall bundledup,he gavemeasadsmile.
âHug?âIasked Herushedbackintohisroom,puttingonhiscoattocoverhisarms,andthenmetmebackinthedoorway.Icarefullyturned myheadtothesideandthenwrappedmyarmsaroundhim,makingsuremyexposedfacewasturnedawayandnowherenear his.Hisarmstightenedaroundmesohard,ithurtandfeltgoodatthesametime.
âOh,kiddo,Iwassoworried.Whydidnâtyoutakemewithyou?Iwoulddoanythingforyou.â
âBecauseIdidnâtwantyoutogethurt.âIclungtohim,relishingthefeelingofasimplehugfrommyfather,somethingIwas constantlydeprivedof.
Touchwassuchanaturalthingforsomany,theydidnâtevenrealizehowoftentheydidit
âYouwouldnâthurtme.âHesoundedcertain.
IdidnâtwanttotellhimaboutburningMasterClarke IwassureheâdheardaboutBlairandherhair,andmaybehethought itwas anaccident. Well, it was anaccident, butmaybe he loved me too muchto realize whatIcould have become had the darknessfullyconsumedme.IlikedhimthinkingIcouldneverhurthim,soIdidnâtsayanythingtocounterit.Ijustheldhim, saidIwassorry,andtoldhimhowmuchIlovedhim.
Thatnight,IsleptbetterthanIhadinweeks.
ThenextdayIawokeintheafternoon ThebloodlossfromMarissadrinkingfrommehaddefinitelyaffectedmyenergylevel, even with Ariyonâs magic running through my veins. By the time I got downstairs, our housekeeper Daniella was already cleaningupthekitchenandeveryonewasgone.
âOh,Fallon,weâresogladyouârehome,âshetoldme Ismiledandthankedher.âWhereiseveryone?â
âYourdadwenttowork Heleftyouanote Andthekidswenttoschool Ariyonsaidtocomeovertohisplaceafterâ Ismiledatthethoughtofmydadleavingoneofhislittlefour-wordnotes,butwhenshehandedmetheletterwithmultiple sentences,thesmileturnedtoafull-fledgedgrin
Hey Kido, Ayden has ben teachin me to read and write. Come to Budderflie Inn if you need me. Otherwyze I wull see you latur. I luv you. Dad.
I HELD thelettertomychestandhadtoblinkbacktears.Aydenwasthesweetestsoul,sogivinginnature.Myfatherlearning toreadandwritewouldhelphimgofurtheratworkandinlife,andIwassogratefulinthismoment Istowedthenoteawayin akitchendrawersoIcouldkeepitforever.
Ilooked around the kitchen, tookina deep breath, and sighed There were a lot ofamends to make todaybefore Ifelt comfortablejustreturningtomynormallife.Withthat,Igrabbedamuffinandwalkeddowntothebasement.Stridingoverto the glass-top displaycase, Islipped the creepyshell crystal, the one thatseemed to be some sortofa linkto the Realmof Rebirth,intomybackpackandthenwentoutsidetogetRanger.
Yanricflewdownfromthetreestomeetme.
âWhere we going?â heasked âIâm going to see Queen Solana. Meet up later?â Iaskedhimback.
âIâll go see Eden Itâs lunchtime Sheâs probably got some extra saved for me â
Ismiledatthat.Sheprobablydid.
YanricflewoffandIrodetothecastle Iwaitedatthefrontforovertenminutes,whiletwoguardsranmymessagetothe Queen.Afteranagonizingwait,halfadozenRoyalGuardsescortedmetoheroffice.Ifeltlikeacriminal,butIunderstood.I wasconstantlydisappointingthiswoman,andsheâdprobablynevertrustmeagain.
Whentheguardknockedonthedoortoheroffice,QueenSolanaopeneditandmetmygaze âHello,FallonâShesounded likesheâdbarelyslept.
Igaveheragoofywave,unsurewhattosayordo,andwaitedforhertoinvitemeinside assumingshewasgoingto Shemightjusthavethemthrowmeinherbasementjailrightnow.
âComein,âshesaid,sighing,andthensteppedoutofthedoorway.
Imovedtogoinside,andtheguardsmovedwithme,butsheheldupahand.âIâmfinetospeaktoheralone.â
âYourHighness,Iadviseagainstthat,âoneoftheguardssaid.
Sheraisedoneeyebrowathim.âNoted.âThensheshutthedoorinhisface.
Iwantedtosnickeratthewaysheâdshownhimwhowasboss,butmystomachwasinknots.Thisconversationwasgoing tobeawkward,nodoubt,butwehadtogetthroughit
âYoubrokeyourpromisetome,Fallon,âshesaidwithouthesitating.
Iheldmyfingertomylips,indicatingshebesilent,andshefrowned Ipulledthecrystalshelloutofmybag,withanoteI hadwritten,andputitonherdesk.ThenoteexplainedthiswasalisteningdevicetotheRealmofRebirthandthatIwasnâtsure ifitworkedbothways,soweshouldbequietwhileitwasintheroom
Whenshesatandreadthenote,hereyebrowsshotupimpossiblyhighonherforehead.Thenshegrabbedtheshellandheld ittoherear,pushingalockofblondhairawayfromherface.
There was a moment of her listening, and then surprise showed on her face as her mouth went slack She gave me a quizzical look and then nodded. Standing from the desk, she strode across the room and disappeared behind the secret bookcaseandintohersecondaryroombeforereturningwithouttheshell
âThankyouforthat.Itmighthelpusinthefighttocome,âshesaid.
Inodded âIwantedtocomeandapologizeforbreakingmywordtoyou Tobehonest,IwasafraidthatifIstayed,Iwould dohorriblethingstothepeopleIlove,andIcouldnâtstandthat.â
Sheshifteduncomfortablyinherseat.âButyouwonâtdohorriblethingsnow?â IpulledoffmygloveandtappedAriyonâsMavenmark âIfeellikemyselfagain Incontrol Novoices,nonightmares,no angrypoweroutbursts.â
She staredatthe markas ifshe wantedtowill itaway,andIknew she hatedthatAriyonhadgivenittome,thathe had compromisedhisabilitytohealforme.
âIstillwanttoworkwithyouondefeatingMarissaandtheNightlings,âItoldher. Shecrossedherarms,takingmeinwithashrewdgaze.âIâmnotsureIwantyourhelp,ifIâmbeinghonest.Ithoughtwehad trust.Youassuredmeyouwerenâtgoingtogodark.Youpromisedifyoudid,youwouldtellme.Idonâthaveroomforanyone inmyBrigadewhomIfeelIhavetowatchmybackaround,âshesaidbluntly Herwordsstung,butIunderstoodwhereshewascomingfrom.
Sheneededtotrustme,andinorderforhertodothat,Ihadtolayitalloutthereforher Ihadtotellhereverything âWhenIwenttoseetheEaldorFaeaboutAriyonâŚhetoldmemyfuture.â
Shegasped.âCanthatbetrue?â
Inodded.âIassureyou,itis.Heknewthingsonlysomeonewhoseesthefuturewouldknow.IgavehimmywordIwould tellnooneabouthisabilities.NotevenAriyonormyfatherknow.â
Solananodded,lookingserious âIwilltakeittomygrave Iwenttoschoolwithsomeonewhocouldglimpsethefuture Itâsverydelicatemagicthatnoteveryoneispowerfulenoughtocarry.â
IhopedshemeantthatbecauseEmmerictrustedmewithhistruth,andIdidnâtwanttobetraythat âHetoldmeexactlyhow tobreakAriyonoutoftheRealmofRebirth.HetoldmeIwouldgodark,buthealsotoldmeIwouldsaveeveryoneinThe GildedCity,âIsaid.
Solanasatupstraighterandcockedherheadtotheside âHetoldyouthat?Thatyouwouldsaveeveryone?â Inodded.âHesaidthatIwouldsavetheentireGildedCitybutatgreatcost.â Solanafrowned âWhatcost?â
Iswallowedhard.âBeforeItellyou,Ineedyoutoswearyouwillnottellanyoneelse.Idonâtintendtotellmyfamilyor friendsâ
Herfrowndeepened.âIswearitonmycrown.â
Inoddedandcontinued,âHesaidthecostwouldbemylife,andthatwithintheyear,Iwouldbedead.â
QueenSolanagasped,herbrowknottingandcausinghertolookmucholder Silencestretchedbetweenus,andherconcernchangedtoshock.
âSoyouwonâthavetoworryaboutAriyon,âIsaid,tappingtheMavenmarkonmyhand âThisistemporaryâ âFallon,IâŚIdonâtknowwhattosay.Ishesure?TheEaldorfae?â
âHeâssure,âIsaidcalmly Iâdcometotermswithitall
Sheblewairthroughherlips.âYousureknowhowtogetmyheartpumping.â Ilaughed.âWell,hangon,thereismore.âIcaughtheruponwhathadhappenedthepreviousnight thatMarissahaddrunk frommeandseemedtobealivingbeingnowandpossiblymorepowerful,thoughAriyonhadcertainlyinjuredher Ialsotold herthatifMarissakilledSolanaandgotthatnecklace,alongwithmyblood,shehadawaytogiveherNightlingspermanent bodies
Solanaâseyeswerewidetheentiretime.
âWell,Ineedadrink.âShestoodandwalkedovertoacabinet,openingittorevealabottleofamberliquid.Afterpouring thefluidintheglass,shetookitbackinoneshot.Thenshecametositbackinfrontofme.
âSowhatdowedo?âsheaskedme.âDidtheEaldorFaesayhowyouwinthebattle?â
Ishookmyhead.âWestillgottafigurethatout,butIknowwewin.â Shescoffed.âWell,thatâsalotofpressure.Whatifwetakeavacationanddonothingandthefuturechanges?â Ishruggedmyshoulders âIhavenoideahowallthatworksâ Solananodded,tappingthedesk.âAllright,wellâŚIguessweâreonthesameteamagain?â Icouldnâthelpthesmilethatgracedmyface âIfyouâllhavemeâ âYoujusttoldmeyouweregoingtodiewithintheyearandthatyouwoulddososavingmypeople.IthinkIhavetonow,â shesaidjokingly Ilaughedandstood.âWeâllbeintouch?â Shenodded.
Andwiththat,Iturnedtoleaveheroffice,feelingmuchbetterthanwhenIcame âOh,Fallon!âSolanacrossedtheroomandhandedmeaflatboxthesizeofmypalm,tiedwithawhiteribbon. Ifrowned
âIwantedtothrowitintothefire,butIkeptitbecauseyouearnedit,âsheexplained. Ipulledtheribbonoffthepackageandliftedthelidinconfusion AlumpformedinmythroatwhenIsaw thegiantgold flamebroach.Engravedalongthebottomwerethewords: Order of the Flame. Fallon Brookshire. âYouusedmydadâsname,âImanagedtosay.
Shewavedmeoffasifsheâdbecomeuncomfortablewithmyshowofemotion âAriyonâsidea Wearitonyourshirtforthe nextfewdaysandpeoplewillknowIhaveforgivenyou.Thatyouâreoneofusagain.â
Ididnâtwanttopushmyluck,buttherewasonethingIwantedtoaskher âDoyouthinkthereisanypossiblewayIcould gobacktotheAcademy?â
Shewinced.âFallon,Iâmsorry,butthatâsnevergoingtohappen.Blairâsfathermademepromiseifyouresurfacedthatyou wouldneversetfootonschoolgroundsagain.Igavehimmyword.â
Inodded, feelinglike Iâd beenpunched inthe gut. Iâd scared Blairâs familyso badlythattheywere worried abouttheir daughterâssafetyaroundme Eventhoughshewastheonewhojumpedmewithherfriendsandnearlykilledme Still,whatI didtoherwasinexcusable,andshewasonmylistofpeopletoseetoday.
âIunderstandâ
âWecanarrangeforprivatetutoringatBaneManor?âsheoffered.
âSoundsgood,âItoldherandleft.
I LEFT RangeratthequeenâsstablebecauseIdidnâtwanttoberecognizedintown
MynextstopwastheoneIwasdreadingthemost,evenmorethanhavingtoleavealetteratBlairâshouseonRoyalRow later today Ididnâtreallyever lookup to Blair, so ifshe hated me, itdidnâthurt ButAvis was another story IfIâd had a normal mother, Iimagined sheâd be someone like Avis. She was kind, forgiving, and always caringaboutothers. Iwas her employee,andIhadleftwithoutevensayinggoodbye Morethanthat,Iwasherfriend
SinceIlivedontheEastSidenow,eventhoughitwasinanoff-the-beaten-pathpartofthecity,IdidnâtneedtoshowIDto theguardstogettoAvisApothecary.IkeptmycloakâshoodpulledupandmyheaddownasIwalkedpastthebrightlycolored shopsandwasremindedofmyfirstnighthere ItfeltlikeforeveragothatIâdbrokenintoTheGildedCitytosavemyfatherâs lifeandexperiencedthekindnessthiswomanhadshownme.Ultimately,itwasherknowledgeofwheretofindAriyonthathad savedhim
BythetimeIreachedAvisâsshop,Iwassofilledwithshameandremorse,Icouldnâtbeartogoinside.SoIpacedthefront instead,tryingtobuildupthenerve.WhatwouldIsay?Didshehiresomeoneelse?Didshehateme?Wasshescaredofme? Thiswasasmallcity.IwasbettingsheâdheardaboutmelightingBlairâshaironfire,and
The door opened to myleftand Avis was there, eyes alight, smile plastered on. âYouâre home,â she said, beaming, and rushedatme
Mythroatcloggedwithemotionasherhandsclampedaroundmyshouldersandsqueezed.
âLight,Imissedyou,child IwassoworriedaboutyouâHereyesgrewmisty,andallofmyapprehensionfled Ofcourse shewouldbeamazingaboutthis.
Shescannedmybody,nodoubtreadingmyenergy,andnodded.âYouseemtobeyourselfagain.â IpulledoffoneoftheglovesandshowedherAriyonâsMavenmark.Hereyesflewopenwider.
âIâmsosorryforleavingandnotsayinganything,âImanaged.
Shewavedmeoff âIâmclosingshop Letâshavesomehotchocolateandcatchupâ Anhourlater,withabellyfullofhotchocolateandawarmheart,IlefthershoprelievedthatAvisunderstoodeverything. Shesaidfleeingwasanormalresponse,andshewasgladthatAriyonandIhadfiguredoutawaytostaveoffthedarkness I
didnâttellheraboutmyexpirationdate,though.ThatwasforYanric,myself,andthequeenalonetoknow.Avisevengaveme myjobbackwithmore hours ifIwanted,since Iwasnâtgoingtobe inschool anymore,andshe helpedme penmyapology lettertoBlair
NowIwasonmywaytoBlairâsmansiontodropitoff,evenifonlytoassuagemyguiltaboutwhatIâddonetoher.
âShe tried to kill you with her friends â Yanricdippedfromthetreeandsatonmyshoulder Ichuckled. âShe did. But Iâm better than her, so Iâm going to do this right,âItoldhim.
Yanric voiced his disagreement and thentold me to meet himat Ariyonâs after He was heading to pickup Eden from school.
Inodded.
ItookmytimegettingtoBlairâs,thinkingabouttheletterandwonderingifitwasgoodenoughtoexplainhowsorryIwas LightingsomeoneâshaironfirewasnâtexactlysomethingIeverthoughtIâdhavetoapologizefor,butitwasanaccidentandout ofmycontrol SothiswasthebestIcoulddo Ipulledoffmyglovestoairoutmysweatyhandsandheldtheletterbetweenmy fingersasIstoppedbeforeBlairâshuge,lightbluemansion.
Takingadeepbreath,Iwalkedupthestepsandsettheletterrightinfrontofthedoor,ontheground ShouldIknockand run?Orjustleave?Eventuallytheywouldseeit,right?Ididnâtwanttobeseen
âWhattheNightlingareYOUdoinghere?âBlairâsvoicecamefrombehindme,andIyelpedasIspunaround.
Blairstoodbeforemewithherschoolbagdroppedtothegroundandafireballinbothofherpalms Herhairwascropped shortinacutepixiestylethatactuallysuitedher,butIknewsheâdbeenforcedintothatcutbecauseofwhatIâddone.
âI Justleavinganapologyletter,âIsqueaked
Hergazewenttotheletteratthedoor,andthefiredisappearedfromherpalms.Thelettersoaredthroughtheairandlanded perfectlyinherpalm.
Shestaredatmeasshetoreopentheenvelope.Isuddenlyrememberedherfather,EthanCrawford,andhowheâdfallenin lovewithSolanaandhadbeenbetrothedtoher how afterMarissacursedSolanawithbarenness,heâdleftherforsomeone elsesohecouldhavechildren Blair.
âYoudonâthavetoreaditnow,âItoldher âShutup,âshesnipped.
Iwasdebatingwhethertorunhomeornotwhenshebegantoread.SoIdecidedtojuststay.Maybethiswasbetter,maybe shewantedtochewmeouttomyface,andifthatwouldhelpherheal,thenIâdtakeit.
After she read the letter, her face had softened a bit. She let it fall to her backpackand thenstared me down, her gaze fallingonthebarehandsthatrestedatmysidesandthemarkthatsatatoponeofthem Hermouthpoppedopen.âSoitâstrue?Ariyongaveyouhalfofhispower?â
Iswallowedhard
âHemustreallyloveyou.âShesaiditwithsomuchpaininhervoice,inthatmoment,Iknewsheâdlovedhimtoo. Ihuggedmyarms.âListen,BlairâŚwhatIdidâŚIâmsosor â
Shewavedmeoff âIdonâtwanttotalkaboutthat,butifyou ever comeatmewiththosedarkpowersagain,Iâll drivea swordthroughyourheart.â
Whoa
Inodded,swallowinghard.Fairenough.Ididalmostburnheralive.âAllright.Iâllseeyouaround.â
Imovedtoleavewhenshereachedoutandcaughtmycoveredupperarm Fearflushedthroughme,andIwastemptedto pullformypower,butIdidnâtwanttoupsetherfurther.YetIwasnâtsureifIneededtodefendmyself.Iturnedtofaceherand foundanappraisinglookinhereyes.âCanyoukeepasecret,FallonBane?â
Iswallowedhard,onlyabletonod SheâdswitchedgearsandIwastryingtokeepup
Shereleasedmeandswoopeddowntopickupherbagandtheletter.âThencomeinside.ThereissomeoneIwantyouto meetâ
Meetsomeone?ShejusttoldmesheâdkillmeifIsummoneddarkpowersaroundher.Nowshewantedmetocomeinside herhome?
ButIwas curious bynature,andthere was nowayIwas leavingwithoutseeingwhoBlair Crawfordwouldwantme to meet.
THE INSIDE ofBlairâshomewasexactlyasIthoughtitwouldbe:richlydecorated,spotless,andfullofhouseholdstaffdoing everychore,fromlaundrytodustingtolandscaping.Blairfirststoppedinthekitchenandgrabbedanapple.âWantasnack?â sheaskedmecasually,asifwewerenâtswornenemies
Ishookmyhead,wonderingifBlairwasill.Maybeshewasheretolockmeinherbasementorpoisonme.Iwouldnâtput itpasthertohavesomelong,thought-outrevengeplot.Iwasstupidtoevencomehere.Shewasprobablytwosecondsfrom pinningmedownandshavingmy head
âIshouldgo,actuallyâŚâIsaidasIslowlybackedoutofthekitchen.
âMymotheristheonewhomadetheoriginalprophesyabouttheupcomingNightlingwar,âBlairsaid,andthenbitintoher applewithasatisfyingcrunch.
Mymouthpoppedopenatherwords Hermother?TheoneQueenSolanaspokeof,whoshehadgonetoschoolwiththat couldglimpsethefuture?
Iwasspeechless.
Blairsteppedclosertome,herfacefallingalittle âAtfirst,everyonethoughtmymomwasthemostpowerfulfaeofher generation,thatshewastheretoglimpsethefutureandinformeveryoneoftheirfate.â
DarknesscastashadowoverBlairâsface,andIknewthisstorywouldnotendwell âItturns outglimpsingthe future takes a toll.Lookingintothe future is dangerous for mymother.Witheachglimpse,she permanentlylosessomething hereyesight,health,mentalcapacitiesâ Igasped.Ihadnoidea.âOh,Blair,Iâmsosorry.â
She nodded. âMymother was adopted, like you, found ina village outside Moonsreach. Theythinknow thatone ofher parentswasEaldorFaeandtheothermagicless Thatâswhereshegetsthegift,theEaldorFaesideâ Istayedquiet.IâdneveroutEmmerictoBlair,nomatterhowvulnerableshewasbeing.
âButitturnsoutwhenyoumixamagiclessandapowerfulEaldorFae,itdoesnâtworkoutflawlessly Themagictakesa toll,sucksthelifeoutofthepersonglimpsing.â
Mystomachsank.
Blairstaredatherappleasiflostinamemory.âWhenmyfatherâsengagementtothequeendidnâtworkout,hechosethe next most powerful fae at The Academy. My mother.â Blair nodded as if to herself. âI donât blame my father for being ambitious,butheâsnotgreatatstickingaroundwhenthingsgettoughâ
Shelookedupatme.âDoyouwanttomeether?Shehadavisionaboutyou,andshehasbeentalkingaboutyounonstopfor weeksâ
Mymouthwentdry.Shewasalive?Iwasnâtsurewherethestorywasgoingtoend.Avisionaboutme?Thatthoughtscared me.Thelasttimesomeonehadavisionaboutmyfuture,theysawmedie.ButIwasnâtsureitcouldgetanyworsethanthat,so Inodded.
âSure.Iâdloveto,âIsaid,totallythrownforaloopatalloftheseevents.
Blairnodded âShelivesintheguesthouseoutback Myfatherhidesherawayandsayssheisreclusiveâ
Myheartpinchedatthat.Herfathermadehiswifeliveseparatelyfromthem?
Ifollowedhertothebackdoor,whereshewavedtoabutler
âGoingtoseemymother,âshetoldhim,andhenoddedashedustedsomealready-cleansurface.
Whenwe stepped outside, Iwas blownawaybythe immaculate grounds and beautiful, light-pinkguesthouse witha teal frontdoor
âMymomlikescolor.âBlairlookedatthehouseandsmiled.
âHangonasecond,Blair,whyareyouactingso normalaroundme?Inthebeginningoftheschoolyear,youtriedtokill me,andIsetyourhaironfirenotthatlongago.Youâreactinglikeitdoesnâtevenbotheryounow.Whatchanged?â
DidAriyontalktoher?
Shestoppedintheyardandsuckedinabigbreath,pickingathernails.âWhenyouâŚwentdarkanddisappeared,Ariyon beggedmymothertolookintowhereyouwere,ifyouwereokay,andhow hecouldfindyou.Hetoldheritwasessentialin winningthewaragainsttheNightlings,whichshehadprophesiedâ
Myheartsankintomychest.âNo.â
Blairnodded âSheâsalwayshadasoftspotforAriyon Soshedidit Shegotweakerafterthat,butthatâsnotthepointâ Shegavemeashylook.âWhenmymothertriedtofindwhereyouwere,shehadacompletelydifferentvisionaboutyouinthe future,andwell shesaidwewouldbefriends ish Imean,shesaidIwasgoingtohelpyouâ
Whoa. Mymindwasspinning.BlairandI,friends?HermotherseemedtohavethesameabilityasEmmeric,butobviously ittookatollonhermagiclesshalf.
âIâdsayanythingispossibleâIgaveBlairasmallsmile IwassogladYanricwasnâthere,orheâdpooponherheadfor evensuggestingitandthentrytopeckhereyesout.
âListen,Ioweyouanapologytoo,âBlairsaid âIwasjealousofAriyonâsfascinationwithyou,andeverytimeIlookedat you,Ijustsawyourmotherandallofthehorriblethingsshedidtoourpeopleyearsago.â
Ibreathedasighofreliefattheheartfeltapology.âThanksforthat.â Blairnodded.âImean,wearenâtgoingtobebestiesoranything,butIâllhelpyouifIcan.â Ismirked.âFairenough.â
Helpwithwhat,Ihadnoidea,butIhopedIwasabouttofindoutbecausenotalotwasmakingsenserightnow.
Wecrossedtherestofthespacetotheteal-painteddoor,andBlairturnedtome.âSheâsâŚeccentric.Someofhermindhas beenlosttotheglimpsing Shecanâtseeatallandthehearinginherrightearisgone,soyouhavetoshout Butshemakesthe bestpralinepieinalloftheEastSide,andsheâsthesweetestwomanIknow.âTherewasathreatinhervoice,likeifIwere abouttomakefunofhermother,sheâdstrangleme
Ismiledatthewayshespokeofhermother,thoughmyheartwassaddenedtohearthatglimpsingthefuturehadharmedher.
âWell,ifshehasanypieinthererightnow,itâsgoingtogeteaten,âIassuredher
Thedooropenedsuddenlytorevealastunninglybeautifulblondwomanwearingabrightpinkdress.Herhairhungintwo loose,messybraids,andshesmiledatBlair.âIhearmydarlingdaughter,butwhoisthisnewvoice?âShereachedformewith herbarehandsasiftofeelmyface,andIleaptbackward
Blair intervened,graspingher motherâs fingers andcurlingthemintoaball.âMother,IâvebroughtâŚFallonBanetomeet youâ
Thegrinthewomanworegotevenwiderandshejumpedupanddown,laughing,andthenspunintoacircle.âSheâshere!â Blairsmiledathermom,andIcouldnâthelpbutmatchherjoy Thecarefree,childlikehappinesswascontagious Iquickly tookamomenttoputonmyglovessoIcouldavoidanyaccidents.
âOh,comein,Fallon!âhermothersaidexcitedly.âIâmLorraine,andIâvebeingwaitingtomeetyou.â
âHi,LorraineâIsteppedintoherhouseandsurveyedthespace Itwasneatandtidyandfullofcolor Paleyellowwalls, turquoisefurniture,andfloralwallpaper.
âSheâslookingaroundatyourplace,âBlairsaid,narratingwhatIwasdoing,andIrealizeditmighthavebeenrudeforme tojustremainsilentandstareatherthings.ButLorrainewassmilinghugelyanddidnâtseemtomind.
âBeforeIlostmysight,Iwasinlovewithcolorandpatternsandartwork.IfigurednowthatIâmblind,thereisnoreason tolivewithwhitewalls.Nowmyguestscanenjoythecolors.â
âItâslovelyandbringsoutveryhappyfeelings,âItoldher.
âIsittrueyoucannotbetouchedoritwilltriggeryourcurse?âLorraineasked Inodded,thenrealizedshecouldnâtseetheaction.âYes,âIsaidloudly.
âEvenyourhair?IaskedBlairifyourhaircouldbetouchedâ
WasthatwhyBlairhadgrabbedmybunthatday?Maybeitwasinnocent,andshehadnâtknownitwouldhurtme. âEvenmyhair.â
âFascinating,âLorrainebreathed,hereyeswide.âIâvenevermetacursedpersonbefore.â Blairclearedherthroatuncomfortably,butIgaveherareassuringsmile.
Icouldseetheeccentricsideofhermother Focusingonthedetailsofmycurserightaftermeetingmemightbeconsidered rude,butIcouldtellshewasnâtmalicious.Shehadaninquisitivemind.
âOh,Fallon,Ihavesomanythingstotellandshowyou Idonâtknowwheretostart âLorraineâsfacesuddenlyfell âIâllhelpyou,Mother.âBlairsteppedforwardandreachedforhermotherâsfingers,interlockingthem.
Lorrainenoddedatthat,seemingtofindsomecomposure.âLetâsgotomyoffice.â
IfollowedBlairandLorrainedownalime-greenhallwayandintoalargeofficewithwall-to-wallbooksandadeskthat satinthemiddle.
âIsshelookingatthebooks?âLorraineaskedBlair âSheis,âBlairtoldhermother.
Lorraine smiled as she satather deskand beganto rifle throughher papers âYouare no doubtwonderingwhata blind ladyneedsbooksfor,butmysweetBlairreadstomeeveryday.Igettolazeaboutandlistentoherbeautifulvoice.â
MyheartpinchedatthewayLorrainespokeofherdaughter.Itwasamother-daughterrelationshipIenviedandithadme wonderinghowBlairhadturnedintosuchabully ButevenasIthoughtit,Iknewitwasfromhavinganeccentricmotherwho dependedonher helpwithdailytasks anda father whohidher mother inthe backyard,awayfromsociety.Thatmighthave beentoomuchpressureforBlair,andsheletoffsteambypickingonotherpeople Stilldidnâtmakeitright,butIcouldseeher lifewasnâtperfect.
âShouldItalkaboutthewarfirstortheportal?OrmaybeIshouldjustletherreadthejournalentry,ohIneedtotellher aboutthedagger â
Blairplacedahandonhermotherâsbackandrubbedsmallcirclesasshesatnexttoher.
Lorrainereleasedashakybreathandsmiledinherdaughterâsgeneraldirection âWhydonâtyoustartwiththedagger?Thatseemedthemostimportant,âBlairtoldhermother. Iwassolost Portal?Dagger?ButIwastryingtobepatient âYes.â Lorraine laid her hands flatonthe deskand chewed onher bottomlip, closingher eyes. âIcanstill see it.â She smiled.âBlackmetal,withnoshine,like itis made fromdarkness itself.AShadow Blade.â The smile was wipedfromher mouth,andIsharedalookofconfusionwithBlair.
Blair grabbed a sketchfromthe deskand handed itto me. âItried to draw whatshe described.â The sketchlooked like
whatLorrainewasdetailing.ThehandlewasornateblackscrollworkandthebladeassoliddarkasYanricâsfeathers.
âWhatisthisShadowBlade?âIaskedLorraine,tryingtogethertofocusononething.
Thewomannodded âYouwillwieldit YouwillholditgloriouslyinbattleanddefeatalloftheNightlings,renderingthem nonexistent.â
Chillsracedalongmyarms,andIswallowedhard Blairwiggledinherseat.âTellhereverything,Mother.TellherwhatitcoststowieldtheShadowBlade.â
Lorraineâsfacefellandshereachedforme Icaughtherfingerswithmyownglovedonesandsqueezed Ifhervisionwas thesameasEmmericâs,thenIalreadyknewthecost.
âYourlifeisrequiredtowieldtheblade,Fallon.â
Thereitwas UndeniableproofthatIwasgoingtodie Twopowerful faehadglimpsedthefuture,andbothhadseenmy demise.Yes,Iâdcometotermswithit,buthearingsomeoneelsesayitwaslikerippingthescaboffahealingwound. âIknowâwasallIsaid âAndthatâsokayâ
BlairlookedshockedathoweasilyIâdacceptedmyowndeath,butIstillwouldnotsharetheknowledgeofEmmericâsgift withothers
âTellmewhereIcanfindtheblade.Howdoesitwork?Tellmeeverythingyousaw,âIaskedher.
Lorraine dropped my hand and began to trace her fingers along her desk as if drawing something. âThe blade attracts shadowsouls ItwilldrawtheNightlingstoit,likemothstoaflame,trappingtheminside,butonlyafteryouactivateit,âshe said.
Whoa Suckinghundreds,eventhousands,ofNightlingsoulsintoabladesoundedlikeaterrifyingnightmare âHowdoIactivateit?âIasked.
Lorrainefrowned.Gettingupabruptlyfromher chair andwalkingover toacorner oftheroom,shebentdown,asifshe werelookingatsomethingonthefloor.
Blairgavemeanembarrassedsmile.âMother,howdidsheactivatethebladeinthevision?â
Lorrainelookedoveratus âOh,shejustpickeditupâShemadeamotionlikeshewaspickingupabladefromtheground andhelditinherhand.
Irealizedthenthatshewasreenactinghervision,whichprobablyhelpedherexplainitbetter âPickingitupdoesnâtsoundsohard,âIsaid,smiling.
Lorrainenodded.âButthepowerofthebladecomesfromyou,fromyourundyingflame.Thepricepaidisyourlife.You⌠feedthebladeyourenergy,allofit,anditâŚeatsthesoulsoftheNightlingsalloverthecity,savingeveryone.â
Thewordsâfeedingâandâeatingâinrelationtoadagger weregivingmethecreeps,butiftherewasonesingleweapon thatcoulderadicatealloftheNightlingsinthevicinity,Iwantedit
Blair frowned. âMother she has one of Ariyonâs Maven marks right now, to keep her fromgoing dark. How will that work?â
MystomachsankbeforeLorraineevenansweredbecauseIknewwhatherresponsewouldbe.
âShe mustgive Ariyonbackhis power and take all ofher darkness backinto her. The blade requires everylastdrop of FallonâsUndyingFlametoworkâSheconfirmedmyworstfear takingonthedarknessagain butitalsomeantthatAriyon wouldsoonbegivenbackwhatbelongedtohim,andthatmademefeelgood.
âWheredoIfindit?âIasked,hangingonhereveryword
Shefrowned,lookinginBlairâsdirection.
âThatâswherethingsgotmuddled Mymothercanâtstayinavisionfortoolongbefore becomingill Shesaidwewere allataschooleventofsomekindbutnothereinTheGildedCity.Therewerecanoes,afirepit.Wescaledamountain,Ariyon, Eden,Ayden,Hayes,you,andI.Andsomeotherboyshedidnâtrecognizewhohadtattoos.Weallworkedtogetherandfound theblade,butwehadtobesecretaboutit,almostlikewewerestealingitâ
Myeyesfeltliketheyweregoingtofalloutofmyhead.Thatwasalotofinformation.Aschooleventbutnot?âCanoes?âI asked Blairshrugged.âSometimeshervisionsdonâtmakesenseâŚuntiltheydo.â
Okay,fairenough âAnythingelse?âIasked
Lorrainewashummingsoftlytoherselfnow.
âDoes the Shadow Blade also help me defeatMarissa?â Iwasnâteventechnicallysure ifMarissa was still a Nightling afterdrinkingfromme
Lorrainestoppedhumming.âYoudonâtdefeatMarissa.â
Itfeltliketheairwhooshedoutofme âWhatdoyoumean?Isaveeveryone IwinthewarbytakingoutalltheNightlings, right?â
Lorrainenodded.âYes,butyoudonâtkillMarissa.Someoneelsedoes.Inanefforttoprotectyou.â
Thechillsreturned.âWho?Ariyon?QueenSolana?Dotheygethurt?â
Lorrainetappedherforeheadwithanindexfinger,harderandhardereachtime.âItâsblurry!â
Blair leaptoffthedeskandrantoher mother,wrappingher momâsfingersinher owntokeepher momfromtappingtoo hard.âOkay,Mother.Thatâsokay.Someoneelsedoes.â
Lorrainerelaxedandrepeated,âSomeoneelsedoesâ Ididnâtwanttohearanymore,butalsoâŚIdid.Ineededtoheareverything.Iwasoverwhelmedyetyearningformore.âYou saidtherewassomethingaboutaportal?â
âTheportal!âLorraineshouted,andBlairjumpedbesideher.âOh,thatâs very important.Therewillbemanyattacks,with one happeningunexpectedlyonthe WestSide Youmake the portal,â she said as she drew a large wheel inthe air withher hands,âandgeteveryonesafelyinsideBaneManor.â
Igasped.âImake aportal?â
Lorrainecockedherheadtotheside âYoudonâtknowhowtoyet?â
Blairlookedatmewithcuriositythen.Aportal?EdenhadsuspectedIwascapableofitaftertakingAriyonâsbodydown totheRealmofEternity,butIwasnâtsosure
âBaneManor?âWhyinthefaewouldIportal everyonetoBaneManor?IquestionedLorraineâs sanityalittlebitatthis point,butsomeofthethingsshewassayinglinedupwithwhatEmmerichadsaid,soIknewtheymustbetrue SheknewIwas goingtodietosaveeveryone.
Lorraine justnodded.âItmustmake sense later.Idonâtknow all the details.â She tappedher headhardagain,andBlair tookhermotherâshandsanddroppedthemtoherwaist âIfthatâsall,Mother,maybeyouwouldliketogetsomerest?â Hermomnoddedrapidly.âTheportal,theShadowBlade,herdeath,savingthepeople.Yes,yes,thatâsall.â
ThanktheLightbecauseIwasnâtsurehowmuchmoreIcouldtake LorrainereacheduptocupBlairâsface âYouneedto speaktoyourfatheraboutgettingFallonbackinschool.YoucanâtfindtheShadowBladeunlessshegoeswithyoutotheplace withthecanoes.â
Blair pursedher lips,likespeakingtoher father aboutgettingmebackinschool wasthelastthingshewantedtodo.Iâd literallyjustspokentothequeenaboutit,andsheâdsaiditwasnâtpossible.StillâŚmaybeifBlairâsdadforgaveme.
IwouldnâtmindeatinglunchunderthetreeswithEdenagain
âYes,Mother,âBlairtoldher,andkissedthetopofherhandbeforewalkingheroutoftheroom.Ashermotherpassedme, shereachedforme,andIhadtoducktoavoidhertouchingmyface
âCareful,Mother.Rememberhercurse?âBlairsaid,andLorrainepulledherhandback.
âOhyes,Iâmsorry,Fallon.â
Irealized thattouchingwas her wayofcommunicating, so Ireached for her hands withmygloved ones. Whenshe felt them,shesqueezedtightlyandsmiled.âItwassuchanhonortomeetyou,Fallon.Thisgifthastakensomuchfromme,butto knowthatmyglimpsingmighthelpyousaveeveryoneinTheGildedCity itmakesitallworthitâ
Myheartpinchedatthat.Itwasadeeplyprofoundandselflessthingtosay.
âThehonor wasmineâIsqueezedher handsagainandthenBlair ledher downthehall toher room,seeminglytogolie down.
Whenshereturned,IwaslookingatthedrawingoftheShadowBlade.
âWhodoyouthinkmadeit?âIasked
Blairshrugged.âItriedtoresearchitthenightmymomfirsthadthevision,butthereâsnothingonit.Iâmnotgoodatbook studyingthough Edencouldprobablyfindsomethingâ
Sheprobablycould.âArewetellingEden?âIasked.IneededtolaysomegroundruleswithBlair,andIâmsureshedidnât wantmetellingothersabouthermom
Blairblewairthroughherteeth.âIdonâtmindtellingHayes,Ariyon,Ayden,andEden,sincetheywereinthevisionofthe ShadowBlade,andAriyonalreadyknowsaboutmymom.â
Inodded âCanIbegyounottotellanyonethatIâmgoingtodieintheNightlingwar?â
Blairgrinned.âYes,youcanbegme.Iwouldlovetoseethat.â
Ireachedoutplayfullyandsmackedherarm,andshelaughed Thenherfacewentserious âThatâsaheavysecretandnot myplace toshare.Youhave mywordIwonâttell anyone.Ariyondoesnâtknow anyofthis.Mymother simplytoldhimshe couldnâtseewhereyouwereatthetimeorhowtobringyouhome,onlythatyoumadeitbacktoTheGildedCityeventuallyâ IwasnâtsurehowmuchIcouldtrustBlairjustyet,butInodded.
âAndIwonâttellanyoneaboutyourmother.SheâsveryspecialandIseehowhergiftscouldbeexploited.â Blairrelaxedalittleatmywords Shemusthavefeltlikeshehadtoprotecthermotheralot Sherubbedherarms âWell, mydadwillbehomesoon.â
âRight Ishouldgo Thiswas overwhelmingbutgoodinformation,âIsaidasIheldupthedrawingoftheShadowBlade Blair chuckled.âYoushouldhaveseenmyfacewhenmymother firsttoldmeandthensaidIneededtohelpyoufindthe blade.Idiedalittleinsideatthethought.â
Igrinned.Thatwas theBlair Iknew.Iheadedfor thehallwayandBlair walkedmeoutside,across thelargegardenand thentothefrontofthehousewherethisallbegan.
âSeeyouaround,Iguess.âIwavedather. Shenodded.âIâlltalktomydad.Hewonâtbehappyaboutit,butIâlltrytogetyoubackintoTheAcademy.â Ifrowned,thinkingofHayesâsdad âHewonâthurtyou,right?â Blairâseyebugged.âMydad?Light,no!Heâs anunemotional pricksometimes,butheâdnever hitme.Hejusthates your motherandtheentireBanefamilyâ Whichmeantmeaswell.Fairenough. Igrabbedmychestinrelief âGood Sorry LongstoryâWhichIwouldnevertell thatsecretwasnotminetotell Withthat,IheadedforAriyonâs,mymindswirlingwithahundreddifferentthings.