www.thecourieronline.co.uk Monday 11 February 2013 Issue 1264 Free
DRESS TO IMPRESS First date? Night out? Staying in? Plan your Valentine’s Day outfit, p.17
Funny Valentine: Mhairi McFarlane talks rom-com Foals’ best yet? clichés, p.14 The verdict, p.28
Pole dance societies rally to axe negative NUS briefing
OBJECTIFYING WOMEN?
The withdrawn NUS brief asserts societies like NUPD promote a body image unattainable for most women Image: Newcastle University Pole Dance Society
By George Sandeman News Editor A brief published by the National Union of Students (NUS) explaining how pole dance societies at universities could be shut down has been withdrawn after negative student feedback. The brief sought to give students the “information and tools” to prevent the creation of pole dance societies at their university and how they could close ones that already exist. Produced by the NUS’ Women’s Campaign team, the brief cited: “Growing concerns around these societies being used as a potential recruiting ground
by strip clubs and about their role in contributing to the increasing normalisation of the sexual objectification of
which women are no longer defined by a narrow and sexist version of sexuality.” Speaking to The Courier Melissa
women.” The brief went on to say that: “Students’ Unions (SUs) should be putting women’s safety at the heart of their policies, and helping to build a society in
Whipp, President of Newcastle University Pole Dance Soceity (NUPD), vehemently rejected the assertion that university pole dance societies contributed to the mainstreaming of the sexual
“We don’t encourage our girls to be scantily clad, we don’t encourage binge drinking, we don’t have ridiculous initiations and we treat our members with respect”
objectification of women. She said: “We don’t encourage girls to be scantily clad in class or on socials. They wear crop tops and shorts similar to those worn in other university sports and exercise classes. We don’t encourage binge drinking, we don’t have ridiculous initiations and we treat our members with respect and they love our society.” NUPD was awarded “most improved society” at last year’s NCL+ awards as well as “best society officer”. Whipp also sought to disassociate pole dancing from the use of poles in strip clubs, saying: “Grinding on a pole is not pole dancing.” The third year Business Management continued on page 5
Lecture class boycotts attendance monitoring By Jenni Cannon
A class of Geography students have taken the decision to boycott all attendance monitoring in their classes. The group of second years took the decision after holding a referendum amongst themselves. The students are studying a political geography module that included discussing the role of monitoring as part of the UK immigration policy. In a lecture about the modern state system and the increasingly tight controls over immigration and movement across borders, their lecturer Dr. Nick Megoran asked his students to discuss measures such as the attendance monitoring that The primary UK Border objection was the Agency requires that being universities to monitored im- implement in the of the Lonplied a lack of wake don Met scandal trust from the over the summer. university, and This discussion eventually led to a little willingvote amongst the ness to allow students regardstudents to be ing use of the lecture register. responsible The lecturer, for their own Dr. Megoran, states that he was learning “surprised at the strength of feeling, as not one student voted to keep the register.” As a result of this unanimous vote to boycott the monitoring of lecture attendance, the register has not been implemented since. It comes at a time when the University continues to finalise plans on how it will monitor international student attendance in order to comply with UKBA regulations. When undertaking the vote, students had a wide range of objections to the policy. The primary objection was that being registered implied a lack of trust from the University and little willingness to allow students to be responsible for continued on page 4
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NEWS
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
News Editors: George Sandeman, Susie Beever and Anna Templeton Online News Editor: Aine Stott courier.news@ncl.ac.uk | @TheCourier_News
Queen’s New Year Honours list recognises faculty achievements 7
BETTER TOGETHER
Team Kenya launched to help institute selfdevelopment
9
HARVARD SUSPENDS Cheating scandal envelopes politics undergraduates
COMMENT
10 13 SPORT
A GROVE FAILURE Minister’s aides behind tweets criticising Labour
FOREIGN FIX?
Can Western troops really help Malians?
By Emily Keen
Newcastle faculty members have been recognised in this year’s honours list. Professor Gary Ford was made a CBE for services to stroke research whilst Mark I’Anson was awarded an MBE for services to entrepreneurship, community engagements and higher education. I’Anson is a successful entrepreneur and is actively involved in the North East business community. He has been a member of Newcastle Universities Council since 2004 and is currently Chair of the Council and Pro Chancellor for the University. His role is essentially to ensure the University is governed responsibly. Speaking to The Courier he said: “It is a big job, one I enjoy. I do it because I love universities”. I’Anson also has a strong affiliation
with the North East. Since selling his own NASDAQ listed company IMP, he has become involved in a range of economic development activities in the region. He is a board member of three local ‘small to medium enterprises’ and is also chairman of NEL, one of the North East’s leading venture capital firm. In addition, I’Anson is a Director of three major local charities and is the Chairman for The County Durham Community Foundation. Despite his successful international business career he says it is important to support local businesses. He has put his roots down in the North East and is now based here with four children. He says he is “personally very proud” to be receiving an MBE but acknowledges the hard work of others adding that “many deserving individuals go
unrecognised”. The second member of faculty to be recognised on the Queen’s 2013 New Year Honours list is Professor Gary Ford. Ford is the Jacobson Chair l’Anson told of Clinical PharThe Courier: “It macology at the of is a big job, one Department Medicine, here at I enjoy. I do it the University. because I love As Director, he leads the overall universities” strategic direction of the network. Over the last six years the network has built a vibrant program of patient care involvement which he says has had “a great impact on the quality of research”. Under his leadership the department has built a strong local research network allowing professionals to collaborate
their research. Looking to the future, the financial climate provides challenges for both I’Anson and Ford. I’Anson asserts that his commitment won’t drop as the University faces new business challenges and he emphasises that in the coming years the role of council will be of greater importance than ever. Ford suggests that the current climate provides a greater imperative for more research. “Now more than ever it is important to reduce the NHS’ costs and improve the quality of life for stroke victims.” Following his CBE, Ford hopes to undertake more high quality research and develop it more quickly and efficiently. Both faculty members will travel to the Palace in March where they will receive their respective honours.
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STATE SIDE SPORTS A look at the MLB and NBA playoffs
SUPER BOWL SPECIAL
A match more akin to an epic film finale
MEETING THE QUEEN
l’Anson says he is ‘personally very proud’ to be receiving an MBE but acknowledges the hard work of others. Image: FLickr
Editor Ben Travis Online Editor Ben Brown News Editors George Sandeman, Susie Beever and Anna Templeton Online News Editor Aine Stott Comment Editors Georgie Moule and Laura Wotton Online Comment Editor Jennifer Evans Features Editor Tom Nicholson Listings Editor Sally Priddle Lifestyle Editors Catherine Davison and Ellie Cropper Online Lifestyle Editors Rosie Devonshire and Colette Hunter Fashion Editors Elissa Hudson and Lizzie Hampson Online Fashion Editor Sally Greenwood Beauty Editor Amy Macauley Arts Editors Lisa Bernhardt and Millie Walton Online Arts Editor Grace Harvey Film NUSU, King’s Walk, Newcastle upon Tyne, NE1 8QB. Tel: 0191 239 3940 The Courier is a weekly newspaper produced Editors Hayley Hamilton and Sam Hopkins Online Film Editor Chris Binding TV Editor Chris Taylor Online by students, for students. It’s never too late TV Editor Ben Parkin Music Editors Chris Haywood and Sam Summers Online Music Editor Sophie Coto get involved in the paper, whether you’re letta Science Editor James Simpson Puzzle Editors Sally Priddle and Tom Nicholson Sports Editors Ralph a writer, illustrator or photographer. Just visit Blackburn, Nick Gabriel and Lucy Williams Online Sports Editors Freddie Caldwell and Jack Gelsthorpe thecourieronline.co.uk/getinvolved for more Copy Editors Rachel Horrocks, Maddie McNeill, Charley Monteith, Leanne Penning, Amy Preston, Tom Rhodes, Gemma Thompson, Jessica Timms, Chris Smith, Matty Aston, Sabine Kutcher information.
The Courier is printed by: Print and Digital Associates, Fernleigh House, 10 Uttoxeter Road, Derby, Derbyshire, United Kingdom, DE3 0DA. Established in 1948, The Courier is the fully independent student newspaper of the Students’ Union at Newcastle University. The Courier is published weekly during term time, and is free of charge. The design, text, photographs and graphics are copyright of The Courier and its individual contributors. No parts of this newspaper may be reproduced without the prior permission of the Editor. Any views expressed in this newspaper’s opinion pieces are those of the individual writing, and not of The Courier, the Students’ Union or Newcastle University.
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Monday 11 February 2013
Community comes together to save Keith’s Pink Lane jazz cafe By Sophie Green
CRAVING CROMBIE
The passing away of the well-known and much loved Keith Crombie has left a prominent gap in the regional and national jazz scene Image: Pink Lane Jazz Coop
Jazz enthusiasts are coming together in an attempt to continue the legacy of local legend, Keith Crombie, who sadly died age 74, on 29 December of a lung infection. Affectionately known as ‘The Jazz Man’, Crombie could often be seen around Newcastle University’s campus, advertising his Jazz venue in Pink Lane, which he ran for 20 years. The quirky music venue attracted performers and jazz aficionados from across the globe, but has been closed since Crombie’s death, much to the disappointment of many. However, Crombie’s death does not necessarily mean the end of the Jazz Café. Shortly after Crombie’s funeral, the Pink Lane Jazz Co-op was set up with the intention of reinstating Newcastle’s iconic Jazz Café as a working venue for live jazz, poetry, dance and related arts. This group have set up a twitter account and Facebook page, and aim to attract members and investors in a community-led bid to keep the café running. They plan to raise investment by selling shares, and seem positive about the success of the new organisation, posting on Facebook on 22 January: “Eight founder members signed the registration documents to set up Pink Lane Jazz Co-op Ltd as a multi-stakeholder cooperative. This means that this group
which started just a week ago will soon be an incorporated body able to trade and make legal commitments.” The Co-op also tweeted that they were “thrilled to have attracted so much support in just three days”. The landlord who owns the site Shortly after stated that the Crombie’s fu- lease had been to secure neral, the Pink forfeited the building, but Lane Jazz Coop said that he welwas set up with comed plans to re-instate the Jazz the intention Café. of reinstating However, he claimed that it Newcastle’s not operate iconic Jazz Café could in its current condition and that it needed major investment to continue running. Proof of the venue’s influence and popularity could be seen at Crombie’s funeral, when a procession of over 600 friends and family made its way through Newcastle from the Jazz Café in Pink Lane to St. Thomas the Martyr Church in Haymarket. The coffin was taken in a horse-drawn carriage, and followed by a jazz band. The service was so well attended that it was standing room only at the church. The procession was filmed and has been posted on the Pink Lane Jazz Coop’s Facebook page, as a touching testament to Keith Crombie’s life and what he stood for.
“The extraction process feels like a bad hangover” • •
90% of matches give stem cells via blood donation procedure Mixed race heritage means even more people need to sign up
By George Sandeman News Editor For 90% of people who are bone marrow matches, the process to extract the stem cells and donate them is a procedure very similar to a blood donation. Speaking to The Courier, fourth year
Medicine student and Marrow CoPresident, Becca Lynn, explained the process. “In the days leading up to the stem cell extraction, the donor is given a full medical examination to check their heart and other organs. Then they are given standard-type injections over the
next few days that stimulates stem cell growth in the bone marrow which then spills over into the blood.” It is from here that donors are then hooked up to a machine that simultaneously draws blood from one arm of the donor, extracts the bone marrow from the blood and then pumps the rest of it back into the body via the other arm. Lynn adds: “It means that not all that much blood is actually donated. The aim is to extract six million stem cells per donor but that’s dependent upon the size of the patient and how much is needed.” “One of the main benefits of this procedure is that the extraction process only takes a few hours and you get to go
home the same day.”
In order to try and dispel the It means that myths surroundnot all that ing the hip injection bone marmuch blood extraction is actually do- row procedure, Lynn, nated. The aim a former Marris is to extract six House resident, explained that it million stem cells per donor was rarely necessary. “Just under 10% of donors are required to have their stem cells extracted by hip injection. It’s done under general anaesthetic and patients have to do it all the time when bone marrow samples
are needed. They also do it without the anaesthetic.” Lynn also touched on why finding a match for Martin has proved so difficult to date. “A bone marrow transplant gives him the best chance for longer term health but because he’s mixed race his tissue type is quite rare and reduces his chances of a match to 40%. “That’s why it’s really important as many people sign up as possible.”
Are you a match for Martin?: The next Marrow clinic is on February 25 at Castle Leazes
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Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Pioneer project for bomb-proof trains By Louise Naylor An engineering team from Newcastle University have designed a bomb-resistant train with the hope of lessening casualties caused by terrorist attacks. The team has used information from the Madrid and 7/7 London bombings to create a blast resistant carriage and will be offering advice to the rail industry on how to better protect Research used passengers. Their design a controlled focuses on two explosion on main areas - beta decommis- ter containing the blast impact and sioned Tube minimising the carriage levels of debris that kill and injure passengers and slow down rescue services. Research was conducted using a controlled explosion on a decommissioned Tube carriage. The results of the camera footage showed that preventing flying objects was the key to reducing casualties. With this knowledge, protection measures were installed in the carriage prototype to tether down heavy components, like ceiling panels using retention wire, give the windows a plastic coating and use lighter energy absorbing material. The EU-funded team, led by Conor O’Neill, saw remarkable improvements from all adjustments, saying: “Tether-
ing ceiling panels reduced the risk of fatalities and injury from flying shrapnel and also meant the gangways were kept relatively clear of debris, allowing emergency staff quick access to the injured.” There were also improvements from the updated windows: “With the plastic coating you see a clear rippling effect as the blast moves through the train but every window remains intact apart from the safety windows which are designed to be easily knocked out. “Without it the windows are blown outwards - putting anyone outside, such as those standing on a platform, at risk from flying glass.” The engineers also focused on dividing carriages with materials that soak up energy and reduce the impact of a blast wave. Methods include plastic-coated windows, energy-absorbing materials and tying down heavy objects and ceiling panels. However, the team are being financially realistic, saying: “Completely replacing existing vehicles just isn’t an option. “Instead, we have developed and incorporated new technology and materials into existing carriages to improve performance.” They instead are advising rail industry chiefs on the best design approach,. This will include making some relatively cost-effective and simple modifications to existing trains which would significantly improve the outcome of a terrorist attack.
FULL STEAM AHEAD
Engineers hope their new methods, influenced by bombings in Madrid and London, will help save lives and prevent future attacks Image: Innpictime
“The current level of monitoring is indicative of a broader society fixated on immigration control”
continued from page 1 their own learning. Students stated that they felt patronised and “treated like children,” by a system that is “inappropriate for adults undertaking independent learning.” Others objected on the grounds of practicality, stating that it is a “flawed system” where “people sign their friends in’, as well as being distracting “when you could be paying attention to the lecturer.” Students further took a reportedly broader, political standpoint that registration creates a “nanny state.”
implications of the university’s plans for revamped attendance monitoring. Taking issue with the lack of evidence and supporting research in the current policy paper, Grayson told The Courier that these methods send a “terrible message to broadcast to the outside world… that the leadership from one of the world’s leading centres of research is unable to make an evidence-based policy.” He also raised concerns that “the final decision will be made… without democratic input from staff and students,” adding that the attendance management option paper does not ac-
One suggestion was that monitoring even of international students is belittling the “multicultural environment which broadens horizons” which is created by having a diverse student population. One student even went so far as to extend the issue to a societal level, writing that “the current level of monitoring is indicative of a government and broader society fixated on immigration control”, and that monitoring of attendance “goes against the fundamental principles of academia.” The wider implications of the policy of attendance monitoring have also been raised by prominent faculty within the University. Dr. Kyle Grayson, a lecturer in the politics school, has expressed his concern in the national press about the
count for the legal implications of consent and the sharing of personal data. Dr. Grayson’s opinion are also echoed by Geography lecturer Kate Manzo who states that the issue should be “open to debate to everyone affected by the practice.” In addition, Dr. Megoran says that he has found “many colleagues have been sympathetic” to the students’ boycott. The member of staff expressed concern that “the University needs to listen to students and work with them, or there could be opposition against this system next year.” Dr. Grayson urges “students who believe strongly that decisions that will impact upon their learning experience and their personal security ought to be based upon evidence, should contact Professor Brink directly.”
“These methods send a terrible message to the outside world, the leadership from one of the world’s leading centres of research is unable to make an evidence-based policy”
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news.5
Monday 11 February 2013
One third of graduate jobs remain unfilled By Sabine Kucher
UNSKILLED? Employers like Barclays are choosing school-leavers over graduates Image: SomeDriftwood (Flickr)
A recent report by the Association of Graduate Recruiters (AGR) reveals that one third of graduate jobs at top employers were not filled last year. The most common reason according to employers? University graduates lack the right skills. The shortage of qualified applicants may come as a surprise amid rising unemployment figures and the tight economic situation many graduates face after leaving university with student loans to pay off. Qualification levels are rising, too: Nearly 20% of graduates achieve a first, while approximately 50% come out of university with a respectable 2:1. However, employers focus more strongly on graduates’ skills, perceiving many to be lacking the right ones. A number of employers therefore turn to hire school-leavers instead, deeming them to be stronger. Barclays only recently announced it has hired its 500th apprentice and plans to expand the scheme due to its overwhelming success. According to employers, school-leavers often have transferable skills such as the ability to work in teams and analytical approaches to problems that graduates lack. For many, it also comes down to students not spending enough time on their applications, leaving them full of grammatical errors and spelling mistakes. Employers therefore urge graduates to ensure that every single applica-
tion is the best they can do – even if that means applying to fewer companies. Of the 197 employers surveyed, almost all complained about the students’ tendency to only apply for top jobs. Often graduates settle for a job only to wait for an opportunity to get a better one as soon as possible, leaving employers to re-advertise the position. This is especially true for employers The most com- in the engineering and industrial mon reason sector, who were was graduamong the busiates lack the nesses struggling required skills most to fill their vacancies. However, some industries face an entirely different problem as graduates are increasingly looking for work-life balance. Very long and inflexible working hours are off-putting with a rising number of companies unable to meet recruitment targets because of it. The report comes just after the UK is on the verge of slipping into yet another recession, with negative growth prevailing during the last quarter of 2012. While unemployment has fallen during that time some fear that the worst is yet to come. Meanwhile the average graduate starting salary is set to rise and analysts expect the number of graduate vacancies to increase by 9%, after they had fallen by 8% last year. Whether that will change the situation graduate employers face remains to be seen.
“If that’s not empowering me then I don’t know what is” continued from page 1 student added: “The origins of pole dancing don’t lie in strip clubs. In Africa it was a form of tribal dancing, in India the Mallakhamb (translated as Pole Gymnastics) was a form of strength training for men and Chinese pole is a form of acrobatics that is actually dominated by men.” Originally published on 16 January 2012, the brief wasn’t removed until last week on 5 February. After being contacted by The Courier, the NUS refused to add further comment to the statement already published on the revised web page. However, The Courier understands that it has only been in the last two weeks that the brief has encountered significant opposition from students across the country. On 2 February, a comment left on the web page under the name Lucas Abedecain admonished the brief saying: “I am sorry, but I think you are misinformed and biased. I am part of a pole fitness society and know of other across the UK and there is nothing flirty about them. “It is a fun to serious sport which encourages exercise for both males and females equally. If you think pole fitness is sexually objectifying women, then you obviously have never been to a lesson, it couldn’t be father from the truth. “It’s casual attire and not in any way sexual, its pure fitness. I think this is an attack on a diverse, friendly and fun sport that is trying its hardest to differentiate itself from the seedy sidelines that people generalise it with. Do your research and find out the facts before you publish a brief.” However, Dr Stacy Gillis, an English Literature lecturer with an academic speciality in feminism, asserted her agreement with the feminist sentiments expressed in the withdrawn brief. Speaking to The Courier, she said: “Students’ Unions are values-led organisations, who should seek to support
social change. The role of SUs is not to blindly provide for any demand within the student population but rather to consider the implications of its actions. People are free to make their personal choice to attend pole fitness classes – they do not require the funding Gillis said: “The and support of SUs to do so.” bottom line Howe ve r, is that pole Whipp, whose NUPD consists dancing has over 130 mememerged from of bers and raised sex work - work over £1600 for which women charity in 2012, contests this point are often saying: “The comforced into, by munity we have circumstance” at NUPD cannot be recreated at a local pole school and the society gives its committee members a range of skills beyond dancing including public speaking, leadership skills and team working.” A native of New Brunswick, Canada, Gillis added: “The bottom line is that pole dancing has emerged from sex work - work which women are often forced into, by circumstance (financial, social or otherwise) or trafficked into. “That pole dancing has become so mainstream and a leisure (for which read “choice”) activity for many middle class women is part of a larger issue to do with the porn-influenced sexualisation of contemporary Western culture, and the ways in which the notion of choice (e.g. “I choose to do this - wear make-up, wear high heels, take my husband’s name when I marry - because I want to do it, and therefore I am exercising personal - and positive - political agency in doing so”) obscures the larger issue of how this choice has been constructed socially.” Further into the brief, it states: “It promotes an impossible and narrow (youthful, busty, thin, white, able-bodied, scantily clad) image of acceptable
female sexuality, which is impossible for women to attain.” Whipp dismisses this saying: “They obviously don’t know what type of girls are doing our pole classes. We have girls of all races, women with different body shapes, under weight and overweight, people who have zero confidence and leave with masses, and people who continue to build it.” Additionally, the brief states: “These ideals damage the health and self-image of girls and young women, and can lead to eating disorders, anxiety and depression.” Whipp strongly rejected these assertions and spoke of a number of cases where the society had provided refuge to people suffering from such conditions. Last year a society member disclosed that she was suffering from anorexia leading to members “help her catch up to her weight where she was allowed to exercise again. Now she is a healthy weight and an active member of pole again.” The Courier also spoke to a member of NUPD, who wished to remain anonymous, who disclosed that she had once been the victim of sexual abuse. She said: “Pole is the only thing that really helped me get over the mental and sexual abuse. “If that’s not empowering me then I don’t know what is and if they’re going to say the thing that got me over sexual and mental abuse takes power away from women then I am personally extremely offended and insulted.” Jasmine Walker, Activities Office at Newcastle University Students’ Union, also commented on the brief saying: “This is nothing to be worried about, we don’t have an issue with our pole dance society.”
Want your say on this story? Visit www.courieronline. co.uk/news to comment
REVISED
Screenshots of the web page the brief was hosted on before and after the decision was taken to withdraw it
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Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Angsty adolescent: school memories live on By Emily Armstrong Dr Joan Harvey, a Senior Lecturer in Psychology at the University, has commented on a recent research project that discovered our teenage memories have a disproportionately strong effect on our adult lives. The new research, carried out by developmental psychologists, shows that the reason memories of school stay disproportionately strong is all down to chemical changes in the brain during adolescence. In the words of chartered psychologist Dr Harvey, we are effectively The adolescent programmed to be ‘hyper-responmind seems sive’ in adolesto provoke cence, a key deextremes of velopment phase feeling and ex- in the human activity. perience, which brain’s “The adolescent is why they mind seems to provoke extremes linger more of feeling and experience, which is why they linger more,” she explains. “As we get older, the mundane memories from that time get filtered out you don’t remember doing your maths homework, but you do remember the time that pretty girl in your class made you feel inferior.” Essentially, science has dispelled the comforting myth that we all clung to in our teenage years – that real, grown-
up life must surely be better than the cliques and insecurities of secondary school. In our teens, the prefrontal cortex the part of our brain that governs our ability to reason, grasp abstractions, control impulses and self-reflect - sees a huge flurry of activity, allowing young adults to develop their notion of self. Any stimuli we are exposed to at this age makes a lasting impression on us. This helps to explain why those few years at secondary school can, in retrospect, feel like a lifetime. This phenomenon even has a name - the ‘reminiscence bump’, referring to the peak in memories through your teenage years and early twenties. Our self-image from our school years can influence our careers and achievements. In October 2012, a study found a compelling correlation between secondary-school popularity and future earnings. Thirty-five years after they left school, the most popular teens earned, on average, 10% more than their less popular counterparts. One of the researchers behind the study explains the findings can’t be explained simply by someone’s personality. She states that: “School is when you learn how to master social relationships - and to understand how to play the game.” So clearly the social winners of school years – and the undergraduate years of uni - are set to come first in later life.
UNDER THE HOOD New research by developmental psychologists suggests that school memories remain disproportionately strong because of chemical changes in the brain that take place during adolescence Image: Liz Henry (Flickr)
The Courier
Monday 11 February 2013
news.7
North East empowering western Kenya By Victoria Monk For most, 2013 is a time for new projects, an elaborate new healthy eating plan and time to finally get on top of your Uni work; or so we said in January. Already we’re a week into February and you’re yet to start any of the above
in Ndhiwa, which is a remote rural Luo community in the Homa bay district of Western Kenya.” Team Kenya seeks to launch sustainable, long term projects with the hope that such work will leave communities able to support themselves independently in the future. Asked why Team Kenya needs help
Team Kenya seeks to launch sustainable, long term projects with the hope that such work will leave communities able to support themselves independently in the future but Team Kenya is here to help. Whilst they cannot stop you from gorging into the chocolate and they’re definitely not going to write those essays for you; they offer lots of innovative ways for you to jump on board with some of their volunteer programmes. Speaking to The Courier, Amy Waugh explains how Team Kenya could enable you to make a difference to someone else’s life whilst gaining invaluable experiences of your own. Of the organisation, she said: “Team Kenya is an independent North East based charity who aim to help and empower disadvantaged communities in Kenya to overcome poverty, injustice and inequality by providing a framework for self development. “The charity currently pays particular emphasis to girls and women who live
from students, Waugh said: “All this hard work is done solely by volunteers; every penny that is raised is spent on projects in Kenya. To ensure the charity runs smoothly and continues the vital life changing projects they run, volunteers are needed.” Projects range from environmental sustainability through to sports and education projects, meaning that volunteering for Team Kenya offers a diverse range of experiences. So if you are inspired by the work Team Kenya or simply have a few spare hours than consider joining the Team.
Want to volunteer? Visit www.teamkenya.org or www.karibunicottages.com
CLASS OUTSIDE
The independent North East based charity aim to help disadvantaged communities in Kenya to overcome poverty, injustice and inequality by providing a framework for self development Image: Team Kenya
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Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Third year receives honorary bursary for academic achievement By Sarah Pratley Greg Colebrook, a third year student, has been chosen as one of four undergraduates in the country to receive a £3000 bursary for outstanding academic achievement. Greg is studying BSc Agriculture with Honours in Farm Business Management. He grew up on a farm in north Lincolnshire. The bursary is awarded by the National Institute of Agricultural Botany (NIAB) and The Arable Group LTD (TAG). The NIAB are a “pioneering
orientated dissertations”. The scheme has been running since 2008 and NIAB TAG has so far awarded £60,000 in bursaries. NIAB TAG awards a £3000 bursary to a promising agriculture student with particular interest in agronomy. A winner is selected from each of the major agriculture universities. Alongside Newcastle, these include Harper-Adams, Reading and Nottingham. The selection process involved a thirty minute interview with NIAB TAG and the assessment of two pieces of coursework from a third year module. Greg said “I answered all of their questions well and gave a lot of my own opinions”.
LUCKY DAY
Third year Greg Colebrook has been picked out of four lucky students in the country for a £3000 bursary.
Greg admits he was very surprised that he won the bursary. He believes he was competing against lots of other good students. plant science organisation” with a mission to “provide independent sciencebased research and information to support, develop and promote agriculture and horticulture”. TAG seeks to promote the study of agricultural science. NIAB TAG awards the bursary through their ASSET scheme. NIAB TAG’s Juno McKee said: “ASSET’s aim is to support and encourage the best undergraduates into careers that will support applied research and knowledge transfer”. She also said that the scheme “encourages students to take ‘crop’ modules and directs them towards crop
Greg admits he was “very surprised” that he won the bursary. He believes that he was competing against “lots of other very good students”. Greg said that he has put the money towards “furthering my agriculture training and visiting agriculture in other countries”. He already has experience on dairy, beef and arable farms across the UK and spent a year travelling and working in New Zealand. After he graduates Greg is set to start work for McGregor Farms Coldstream as a graduate trainee.
Uni genetics professor issues student cancer warning By Evgeniya Boykova The leading Newcastle scientist John Burn, professor of clinical genetics at the university, used World Cancer Day last week to issue a national warning over the links between smoking and cancer. Professor Burn explains cigarettes cause mutation due to chemicals in to-
number of scientists from the region are getting behind a campaign that shows how just 15 cigarettes can cause a mutation that can lead to a cancerous tumour. Even though the number of smokers in the region is falling, campaigners say too many people are still dying unnecessarily. The number of people living with cancer in the UK is increasing by 3% every year.
Shocking statistics reveal smoking causes 3,000 new cases of cancer in the North East each year, with students being a concern
bacco smoke which essentially attach to and damage the DNA in our body’s stem cells. The scientist adds that smoking is responsible for 15 different types of cancer, lung, mouth and throat being a few examples. Shocking statistics reveal smoking causes 3,000 new cases of cancer in the North East each year, with students being a primary concern as demographic who have a high usage. New figures released by the Fresh, the anti-smoking campaign group, show that 14,813 people were diagnosed with cancer in the North East in 2009. The following year, the North East had an estimated 2,100 deaths from smoking-related cancer. The anti-smoking group Fresh and a
The organizers of World Cancer Day 2013 (4 February 2013) will focus on Target 5 of the World Cancer Declaration: Dispel damaging myths and misconceptions about cancer, under the tagline “Cancer - Did you know?”. This year the focus is on 4 popular but false myths about cancer: that cancer is just a health issue, that it is a disease of the wealthy, elderly and developed countries, that cancer is a death sentence and that it is unpreventable.
Want to write for The Courier? Come to meetings at 3pm Monday in the MLK suite in the Students’ Union
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Monday 11 February 2013
internationalstudentnews.9
Harvard carry out mass investigation Flat share site UEA cause into cheating, suspending 70 students leaks student LGBT flag By Kathryn Riddell Due to accusations of cheating during a take-home exam, Harvard University has asked 70 students to leave. Of the 279 students enrolled in the undergraduate politics course, nearly half of the students were investigated when a tutor noticed that some answers on the final exam were almost identical. The Administrative Board subsequently reviewed the possibility of collusion and plagiarism. In their defence, some students have argued that the similarities in their answers were caused by sharing lecture notes or talking to the same teaching
Job Title: Newcastle Work Experience - Marketing Assistant Employer: Car 2 U Closing date: 17.02.2013 Salary: £600 bursary upon completion of placement Basic job description: Car 2 U are a 4x4 and dual control hire specialist based in Sunderland. They are an expanding team working with the latest technology to support their customers. We are looking for an individual to assist the business in its overall sales and marketing activities. We need to focus our marketing to ensure that we are in the ‘right’ place both online and in print. This placement involve: Representing Car-2-U at events Social media activities; Arranging PR; Designing and sourcing marketing materials. Person requirements: You must have a passion for marketing with previous experience and/or knowledge of running marketing campaigns. Familiarity with website design and search engine optimisation is preferred but not essential. We are looking for a young, fresh, hungry “go getter” that wants to gain some practical hands on business experience, whilst adding value to the organisation at the same time. Location: Sunderland. Job Title: Newcastle Work Experience - Software Development Officer Employer: Plus 3 Architecture Closing date: 17.02.2013 Salary: £600 bursary upon completion of placement Basic job description: +3 Architecture is an award winning architectural practice based in Newcastle. Our approach to design is defined by a process of listening, challenging, imagining, making and most importantly enjoying. We have developed our own unique methodologies and questionnaires for this service which at present are heavily dependent on the input of staff to carry out the questionnaires and input the resultant data. We are seeking an individual to develop a web-based tool to make the process more engaging, the input of data more straightforward and the resultant production of info graphics easier. This could be through the adaptation of existing software (such as Survey Monkey) or the creation of a new programme/app. Person requirements: We are looking for someone with a blend of technical/IT and graphic skills and an interest in the way in which carefully considered questionnaires and graphics can aid engagement and communication. Prior experience of website/software/app development will be crucial. Location: Newcastle upon Tyne. Job Title: Newcastle Work Experience - Adventure Travel Coordinator Employer: Gap Medics Closing date: 17.02.2013 Salary: £600 bursary upon completion of placement Basic job description: Gap Medics is the UK’s largest provider of international work experience
personal info controversy
fellows, who advised the students on how to interpret the exam questions. One accused student produced his Some stulecture notes for the ‘Introduction dents have to Congress’ class argued that the Administrathe similarities to tive Board and was were caused not asked to leave. by sharing The Administralecture notes. tive Board has not clarified the distinctions between those allowed to stay and those asked to leave, or whether the university had investigated the teaching staff in their review.
placements for students interested in a career in Medicine. We require a Customer Service Coordinator who will be responsible for contacting confirmed placement students before they travel. Your duties will include: Sending out and collecting parental consent letters; Confirming students preparations for their trip; Answering student and parent questions on the phone; General customer service support. The placement will also involve welcoming new customers to our programme. Person requirements: The successful candidate must have an excellent telephone manner with solid IT skills. You must have experience using Microsoft Office including Excel and Word. For the correct individual, this term time placement can lead to a further NWE placement this summer. Location: Newcastle upon Tyne. Job Title: Personal Shopper Employer: ASDA Closing date: 13.02.2013 Salary: To be confirmed Basic job description: A Personal Shopper is required to work 5 hours per week at the ASDA store in Gosforth, Newcastle. As a Personal Shopper, you are effectively the customer - they have placed their trust in you to pick items that meet their selection criteria. We’ll always expect you to pick products that are readily available on the shop floor to meet customer home order specifications, ensure the ‘Made to Order’ report is passed to the counters and Bakery colleagues as soon as it is available. Person requirements: We’re one big team, so we’re looking for helpful, outgoing people who can get along with and support others. Location: Gosforth. Job Title: Counter Server, Grill Chef, Kitchen Porter, Drinks Maker Employer: Ed’s Easy Diner Closing date: 20.02.2013 Salary: Exceeds National Minimum Wage Basic job description: Be part of the team at the best new diner in town! Ed’s Easy Diner is coming to Gateshead Metrocentre, opening early April 2013! It’s the best place in town for the freshest burgers, the hottest fries, and the coolest shakes! The atmosphere is fun and we value the right attitude in our staff rather than experience. The new Ed’s Easy Diner has multiple vacancies, both full and part time. Person requirements: We know experience isn’t everything. We look for a positive can-do attitude and those who are looking to go above and beyond to ensure exceptional customer service is offered to our diners. Location: Gateshead. Job Title: Weekend Retail Supervisor Employer: Yankee Doodle Candy Closing date: 27.02.2013 Salary: To be confirmed Basic job description: A Weekend Retail Supervi-
sor is required to work part-time hours at the store in the Metrocentre. You will be responsible for the effective running of the store, ensuring sales targets are met, customer service is at its highest and that staff are motivated. You will also be responsible for coaching, developing, leading and motivating teams, maintaining the atmosphere ensuring it is always pleasant and active. Person requirements: Previous retail experience is essential, preferably within the food industry. Must also have previous supervisory experience and high standards of personal hygiene. The highest quality of customer service is required, expected to help build customer loyalty due to impeccable customer service. Location: Gateshead. Job Title: Sales Consultant Employer: Goldsmiths Closing date: 07.02.2013 Salary: Competitive Basic job description: A Sales Consultant is required to work part-time hours at the Goldsmiths store in Newcastle. You will deliver truly exceptional customer experience to our clients, showcasing your excellent technical knowledge and developing relationships with your discerning clients, achieve and surpass your personal sales targets, ensure that our store and products are presented to the highest standards. Person requirements: The successful candidate will have previous retail or customer service experience where you have delivered superior 1-2-1 customer experiences, have success in a selling environment, ideally with premium products, have great communication skills and a passion for our products! Previous experience of Jewellery and watches is preferred, but not essential as full product training will be given. Location: Newcastle. Job Title: Domestic Assistant Employer: NHS Closing date: 04.02.2013 Salary: £14,153 to £14,864 pro rata Basic job description: A Domestic Assistant is required to work various part-time hours at North Tyneside General Hospital. Hours of work may be throughout mornings or evenings. In this role you will maintain the standard of cleanliness as specified throughout the designated work area by means of approved cleaning methods. Person requirements: General education and knowledge of cleaning products i.e. COSHH is essential and knowledge of food hygiene would be beneficial. You should also be friendly, conscientious, highly motivated with good organisational and communication skills, you should also enjoy working as part of a team. Previous applicants are requested not to re-apply. Location: North Tyneside.
University of Lincoln
University of East Anglia
A website which offered to ‘find’ flatmates on behalf of Lincoln’s first-year students has been taken down after personal details such as names, addresses and Facebook profile details were shared publicly. The website’s database included 685 students’ details and could easily be found by a simple Google search. The website, which was independent from the university, advertised itself as a “totally free service for freshers of the University of Lincoln to help find their future flatmates before the big day.” This information was only meant to be accessed by students in the summer of 2012 before the start of a new academic year, but was only removed at the beginning of February this year. Judith Carey, Director of Student Affairs at Lincoln said: “Students should always be vigilant when asked to provide personal details to third parties, including online, and should always think how that information might be used.”
A decision by the University of East Anglia has caused “great disappointment” amongst the Union of UEA students by deciding not to fly the Pride flag in February to mark LGBT+ History Month. LGBT+ officer Richard Laverick said the Union felt that the flag “would send a clear message to LGBT+ students, staff and visitors, that they are most welcome and can expect to be treated equally and respectfully on campus.” In the Union’s LGBT+ student experience survey last year, 83% said they wanted the University to fly the flag. A spokesperson for UEA said: “While we support wholeheartedly the rights of our LGBT+ students and staff, we are unable to agree to their request to fly the rainbow flag. The Registry flagpole is used to fly the official university flag. On the very rare occasions that we depart from this, it is to mark a ceremonial occasion such as a royal visit.”
Student creates nude playing cards for charity
‘Dissertation dash’ in jeopardy amid uni concerns
Portsmouth University
Sussex University
In a unique bid to raise money for charity, as student at Portsmouth University has created nude playing cards, as a twist on the traditional nude charity calendar. Second year Maths student Lee Watson needs to raise a total of £2,800 in card sales in fund climbing Mount Kilimanjaro for the charity Practical Action, but his personal target is £5,000. Lee’s friends volunteered to pose on the cards with girls assigned to diamonds and hearts and boys to the clubs and spades, with props and sports equipment used to preserve the volunteers’ modesty. Packs of cards will be sold at £5 each with individual cards being auctioned off at face value. Further fundraising includes buying the ‘rights’ to a comment on each card, which could have potentially embarrassing consequences for the photographed volunteers.
Students at Sussex University are campaigning to save the ‘dissertation dash’, an annual tradition where third-year students run through campus to hand in their university assignments at the same time and place before the deadline. But this year there is no longer a single location to submit work, leaving the exuberant parade in jeopardy. A spokesperson for the university says the event has become too large to manage. But the University of Sussex Student Union (USSU) says it will fight the decision They have used the Twitter hashtag #savethedash to express their dismay at the university’s decision, with one student tweeting: “I’ve been looking forward to my dissertation dash ever since my first year, don’t take it away from me #savethedash”.
Images: Guillame Paumier/ Flickr
Kathryn Riddell
10.comment 3 reasons why... ...I would pay high prices to see world class artists 1) It’s better than ‘Priceless’... In the Mastercard adverts, the ‘Priceless’ moment is usually a newborn baby burping, or an elephant doing your shopping. Whilst these ‘Priceless’ moments are actually fairly mundane or thoroughly ridiculous, with a sepia setting added to the camera to make them appear special, grabbing onto Damon Albarn’s leg, whilst screaming Song 2 in a sweaty mass of fellow revelers, is the definition of the concept of ‘Priceless’. Except it can be literally be bought, and can actually happen, and is totally well worth it.
2)They could die soon... Whilst in the case of Beyoncé this may not be an issue, with other iconic artists this is a more salient point. The Rolling Stones are touring again, and Keith Richards has ingested enough drugs to kill a whole stable of horses over the course of his career, it’s best to see him and Mick sooner rather than later. Michael Jackson is also a case in point, except he sadly died before the multi million dollar tour.
3) They usually still have ‘it’... Seeing your favourite unsigned band at a local haunt is a lot like driving an aging Citroën or Mini. You will undoubtedly look cool, however sooner rather than later a technical fault will occur, the singer will falter perhaps getting the wrong key, and the experience is never quite as good as it looks. It is the opposite with the older well practiced bands. They resemble a smooth modern German car, the rhythm section purring, how often do Bill Wyman and Charlie Watts ever miss a beat.
Image: Anthony Chu (WIkimedia Commons)
Ralph Blackburn
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Twitter drama for Gove
After two of Michael Gove’s special advisors were revealed to be behind a Twitter account criticising Labour MP’s, Francesca Powell discusses what this means for the Department of Education.
Y
ou may be aware that last Sunday (3rd February), The Observer broke a story alleging that Michael Gove’s two top special advisors, Dominic Cummings and Henry de Zoete, are behind an anonymous Twitter account used mostly to dispense news from the Department for Education and point followers in the direction of newspaper articles and letters supporting Conservative education policy. Nothing shocking or untoward about that. The problem is that it is also being used to attack journalists and Labour politicians who disagree with Tory education policy, which means that if Cummings and de Zoete are behind the account, they are breaching the special advisor (also known as ‘spads’) code of conduct which forbids the use of public money and employees (spads are classed as temporary civil servants, making them public employees) for partisan purposes. A similar smear campaign by special advisors lead to the suicide of Dr David Kelly in 2003.
While there is no concrete proof that either de Zoete or Cummings are involved with @toryeducation, (apart from the fact that Conservative HQ’s own Twitter account lists @toryeducation as one of four Twitter feeds “run by staff at Conservative campaign headquarters”). Whoever holds the account is very well informed about education policy, suggesting she or he is close to Gove and his inner circle.
“They are acting much as politicians do during Prime Minister’s Questions and in the mainstream press” Furthermore, The Observer reported
allegations that in 2011, Henry Macrory, then Tory Head of Press, asked them to tone down their input into the account. Having read some of @toryeducation’s more recent tweets, it seems that they are simply acting much as politicians do during Prime Minister’s Questions and in the mainstream press - petty pointscoring - but in 140 characters or less. It’s just that it probably isn’t a politician saying it. Not only are there attacks on the group many consider to be Gove’s favourite target – teachers (‘Approx. 100% of Education Establishment are happy for exams to be poor so they can claim ‘progress’ every year’, 23rd Jan), it has also attacked Alastair Campbell, the former Labour spin doctor, linking him with the Russian and Kazakh governments and making snide remarks about his past mental breakdown (‘D’you often accuse people u disagree with of “meltdowns” @campbellclaret ? Or are you still worried about the stigma around mental illness?’, 17th December). Another high-profile target is Tim
Loughton MP, Children’s Minister until being sacked in the last reshuffle, who was denounced as a ‘lazy, incompetent narcissist’ after criticising the DfE as inefficient and bureaucratic. Labour, led by shadow education minister Stephen Twigg, have called for an inquiry, to which the government has yet to respond. But even if this happens, will it really change anything? After the long, expensive saga that was the Leveson Inquiry, the British public are not in the mood for another one, especially one that seems to have so little influence on anyone outside Westminster and Fleet Street. And, as a country that has seen The Thick of It, are any of us really surprised about any of this?
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Tour de-ception
As people demand refunds for Lance Armstrong’s autobiography, Johnny FarrarBell considers the implications this has for other sportsmen and women JOHNNY FARRARBELL
T
he Lance Armstrong saga has had many repercussions. Sponsors are seeking compensation, the sport of cycling being held to ransom over drug allegations and now it seems – most bizarrely – people in America want their money back after buying his autobiography. We live in an age when it seems as though everything can be claimed on insurance. Only today Rowan Atkinson has submitted a £910,000 bill after crashing his Mclaren F1 supercar into a tree. Amazingly I managed to receive a virtually free camera after breaking an old one and my father was able to claim a lost watch on insurance. Should autobiographies carry similar lifetime guarantees, such as: ‘If the claims made within are proved invalid full compensation will be provided’?
“Many now seem embarrassed to admit to being Armstrong fans before the truth emerged” One can see the potential benefits of such a proposal. Sportsmen and others would perhaps think twice before writ-
ing dubious accounts about their own achievements. Perhaps even the Lance Armstrongs’ of this world would be less inclined to lie so publicly if they knew the financial repercussions that would come their way. But I doubt it.
“Let’s not let it tarnish our noble, upstanding sportsmen by setting a precedent”
In fact all that it would lead to would be the further erosion of trust in sportsmen. The majority involved in sport are truthful and some have genuinely fascinating stories to tell. Two of my favourites are Bear Grylls’ Facing Up and Jason Robinson’s Finding My Feet. They are amazing and true stories of dedication and how people can overcome physical and mental frailties. Staining them with the brush of Lance Armstrong would make one wonder, whether Grylls really did break his back? Or, what the truth is behind Robinson’s recovery from alcoholism? Giving compensation to those who bought It’s Not About The Bike: My Journey Back to Life would set a dangerous precedent, undermining trust in sportsmen. The mantra: ‘innocent until proven guilty’ is also important to remember in the fallout from Armstrong-gate. Many now seem embarrassed to admit to being Armstrong fans before the truth emerged. But really there is nothing to be ashamed of. We now know he was lying but until proof was given no one could tell for certain. Thousands of ru-
REFUNDS
Should readers be given refunds on Lance Armstrong’s autobiographies? Image: Calum McRoberts (Wikimedia) mours constantly circulate in public life and most have no grounding. Think of Andrew Mitchell supposedly calling Police Officers ‘plebs’, or, more shockingly, Lord McAlpine being accused of having molested children. Both were shown to be complete fabrications but many jumped on the bandwagon. Let’s not let the Armstrong saga make us liable to malicious rumours and accepting every titbit of celebrity gossip out there. An equally false rumour that has spread recently is that of libraries in Australia moving Armstrong’s books to the fiction section. Though reputedly untrue it highlights an interesting point: that his books may now, in fact, be of more interest to the reader. Perhaps, rather than being rubbished, his ‘biographies’ can be appreciated for what they really are: amazing works of fiction
and deceit. From being the heroic tale of one man’s battle against cancer to win the Tour seven times it becomes a tale of one man’s decade long deception. Are there many books so based on lies that one can now read? Perhaps GCSE set texts will now need updating, gone forever the bore that is ‘I’m the King of the Castle’! Imagine: ‘Analyse the extent to which one can suspect deceit in the writing of Armstrong?’ So the Armstrong affair is a sad old saga, but let’s not let it tarnish our noble upstanding sportsmen by setting a precedent in compensating tight-fisted Americans. Let’s continue to trust our sportsmen until proven otherwise. But above all perhaps we can appreciate Armstrong’s books for what they are: incredible works of fiction. Maybe I’ll even go and buy one.
The Courier
.11
Monday 11 February 2013
Comment
Comment Editors: Georgina Moule and Laura Wotton Online Comment Editor: Jennifer Evans thecourieronline.co.uk/comment courier.comment@ncl.ac.uk | @Courier_Comment
PROTESTS
The rape of a student in Delhi has sparked protests Image: Jim Ankan Deka (Wikimedia)
Should the Delhi rape trial be made public? HEW ROUS-EYRE
YES T
he Indian public is now well aware of the gang rape and murder of a 23-year-old Indian student that occurred on December 16th last year. What it won’t be fully aware of are the details of the trial of the five suspected men, the 80 witness statements giving evidence to the matter, or the defense of the accused who have all pleaded not guilty. Judge Yogesh Khanna has seen fit to prohibit any media coverage of the proceedings; no journalists will be allowed in the courtroom, and any lawyer interviewed by press teams will not be permitted to give any information regarding the trial. Although there are some clear reasons as to why these measures have been considered, how Khanna came to the conclusion that they were a necessity is baffling. That the trial should be done in private is terrible news from a public point of view. The riots and protests that have been ongoing for nearly two months now will not be mediated by the process of justice going on behind closed doors. Roads have been closed, tear gas has been used to quell the violence and attempts have been made to break into the President’s mansion, all for the sake of justice. Now those protesters won’t
have any information about the form of said justice and will have to settle on their trust in the judicial system. Publicly naming a victim of rape is against the law in India, and to some extent the reason why the trial has been kept private. Although this show of dignity is one of respect to the family, the family themselves have stated they don’t mind their daughter being named. What’s more is that the media have not named the victim since the event in December and, as long as it remains illegal to do so, one cannot see why they would start now.
is going on within the trial. We don’t know what evidence the 80 witnesses revealed, we don’t know what kind of defense the lawyers of the accused have set up and we have no indication of the actual concrete details of the crimes themselves. How is the Indian public supposed to blindly lay their trust in the legal system when it was just last year that the 2012 Indian anti-corruption movement shook the nation? Trust is not something that can be demanded and it is certainly not something that the Indian public should have to settle for.
“Trust is not something that can be demanded” As with most cases involving something as sensitive as this, the safety of the accused must be taken into account. What with the outrage of the incident it is thought that a private trial with no members of the public is best for sustaining a safe environment. Surely this is just a matter of tighter security? I’d take free and public justice over expenses on a few metal detectors and couple more guards any day of the week. Publicity is essential for a fair and transparent process of law. The fact that the information from the hearing is not being made evident is testament to that. Without sounding like a paranoid conspirator, we don’t know what exactly
SUSIE BEEVER
NO T
he story of the brutal rape and murder of an Indian medical student had shocked nations all over the world due its coverage in the national press. And rightly so, when inhumane acts like this take place the public should be aware to a certain extent that attention is drawn to the plight still suffered by many women across the globe. However, with press regulation comes an entire new set of strict and systematic laws. It is only right that in light of such corrupt morals that the press presents
a united front of moral decency. Under no circumstances should attention over the world interfere with attempts to enforce justice and create a sense of closure for all those affected by the tragic incident. In light of respect, it only seems fair that an event which has already devastated and forever changed the lives of
“It is only right that in light of such corrupt morals the press present moral decency.” both victims’ families is not splashed across the world’s papers, however much interest there already is. When did it become okay for the media to profit through causing further aggravation to the already bereaved? It’s important to understand the ‘do’s and don’ts’ of press regulation and the right to anonymity. However, there is a fine line between freedom of information and press intrusion. Not a legal line, but a moral line nevertheless. The issue of women’s injustice in the East is perfectly yet shockingly highlighted through the recent events in New Delhi, where the said female student was beaten, raped and left for dead on a roadside. Yet by bringing the story to the world’s attention, the press would be better off exposing further on going scandals in this part of the world which
are still putting women’s rights and lives at risk. The Indian courts have showed moral responsibility in excluding the media from the current trial for this horrific crime, now the ball is in the court of the press themselves to further demonstrate these values by moving on and bringing other women’s issues to light. Acid attacks are still a common form of assault upon women in the Middle East, where strict marital codes of conduct mean that divorced women have acid thrown in their faces to ensure they will be unable to remarry. Girls as young as eight years old are married off to men in their 40s to ensure a mutually beneficial payment for both families, with no prospect of education or independence. Meanwhile, it is still common rate for girls to be trafficked for sex slavery in parts of India and the Middle East, particularly in countries such as China and Thailand where there is a heavy influx of male business-class tourism. These are not simply ‘women’s issues’, but human rights issues. It is a human right to have access to education, financial independence, and the ability to choose your own life path. It is the responsibility of the press to be highlighting these breaches as much as possible; not as double page features in The Sunday Times magazine insert, but as front-page national news. By drawing attention to the dregs of human behaviour, which so many women still suffer, it is a step to justice. The world’s media would therefore do right to take a step back from the case of the 23-year old student, who was essentially targeted for asserting her own independence. Instead, we should leave the case in the hands of the law, and move on to expose other pressing issues, which many women do not have the power to expose themselves.
12.comment
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Castro’s first appearance in months
Beijing trapped under thick smog
Last week the ex Cuban Prime Minister Fidel Castro made his longest public appearance in three years, turning out to vote in the upcoming general election. His younger brother Raul is currently in power, continuing the strict Communist rule enforced by Fidel, who at 86 is 5 years older. The age gap was showing with Castro appearing stooped and talking quietly, albeit persuasively, about the ‘truly revolutionary’ Cuban people. However with 95% of the voting population expected to cast their lots, it’s doubtful whether it’s Castro’s revolution they want to continue.
New statistics have revealed that air pollution levels from China’s coal burning energy plants are now over 20 times the recommended safety level in the capital Beijing. The government has advised that residents remain inside their homes to avoid the toxic air, which can cause serious respiratory infections, especially in children. Poor visibility from the unmoving smog clouds over the city has caused travel disruption through road accidents and the cancellation of many outgoing flights, leaving many travellers stranded just ahead of Chinese New Year.
Nine die in Solomon Islands tsunami A tsunami in the Solomon Islands killed at least nine people on the 6th February. Triggered by an underwater earthquake, a series of 1.5 metre waves entirely wiped out five villages on the west side of Santa Cruz, obliterating an estimate of 460 homes. A child and several elderly were among those dead although various disaster relief groups will continue searching other remote villages for bodies. The initial waves, calculated at an 8.0 magnitude, were proceeded by a series of powerful aftershocks that contributed to the damage of the airport runway and thus preventing easy access for aid workers. Survivors are currently taking refuge in temporary shelters on higher ground.
WORLD AT A GLANCE
Bali Introduces Death Penalty Lindsay Sandiford, the 56-year-old British grandmother caught smuggling £1.6m worth of cocaine out of Bali, could be executed by Indonesian firing squad ‘within weeks’. She was charged with the death penalty but was given hope by the fact that Indonesian authorities haven’t executed a criminal since the Kuta bombers in 2008. However, attorney general Basrief Arief has now announced that death sentences will resume soon following Sandiford’s high profile conviction. She is currently trying to use her media profile to raise funds for an appeal against the fatal condemnation it has caused.
Caroline Mackrill
Image: NASA (Wikimedia)
Ticking all the boxes?
As some Universities adopt methods of positive discrimination, Adam Thompson discusses concerns surrounding class prejudice ADAM THOMPSON
C
oncerns about class prejudice are as strong as ever. In the press, around the dinner table, on the streets tensions still persist. But an unusual, more contemporary development is so-called ‘posh-prejudice’. This is a phenomenon I wasn’t aware of until fairly recently. While the argument has always gone that those from working class backgrounds struggle to get into certain universities because of elitism, commentators are beginning to suggest that the opposite is in fact true – that those who receive a private education are, in some respects, suffering from discrimination. Universities do indeed subscribe to various government quotas regarding how many private and state school students they accept. Durham and Exeter have recently agreed to such a quota. Oxford and Cambridge now have more state students attending than at any other point in the last 30 years. A Master of an Oxford college says, “every applicant is considered on their own merits, but because public school pupils are so well coached, it can be difficult to penetrate their armour and find the person beneath”. The worm appears to have turned then. Whenever a posh friend of mine complains about ‘posh prejudice’ though, I’m unlikely to respond with a sympathetic ear. If your dad works for CERN; if your uncle rowed for Team GB; if your name is a complex network of roman numerals, morally corrupt emperors and exotic animals; if you can pronounce words without spitting or being done for verbal assault, you’ll be fine. You have contacts, boy. It is also worth mentioning that posi-
tive discrimination – forcing prestigious universities to take on more state educated students – works. As a force for social mobility, little can be more effective than social engineering. It may surprise some then that I cannot support this positive discrimination. Yes it works, but I feel it is the easy option. What we end up with is a situation where nobody wins. The achievements of working class students are tainted as they begin to consider whether they actually deserved their place or if an esoteric accent is what got them where they are.
“If your name is a complex network of Roman numerals and exotic animals, you’ll be fine” Meanwhile, the upper-middle classes are seemingly punished for what they achieve. All that we are left with is bitterness and a class of graduates that were fast-tracked by random chance. I can’t help but feel our time would be better served resolving the disparity between state school education and private schools like Eton. Improve the quality of state schools and you have a more sustainable model to build a system of education on – a true meritocracy. I would never want the poison chalice of being cherry-picked for my dodgy accent any more than I’d want to be rejected because of my apparently privileged schooling. Positive discrimination is the quick-fix but not the longterm answer.
The Courier
comment.13
Monday 11 February 2013
Western intervention proves dangerous for Mali With fighting in Mali winding down, Matthew Hall argues that intervention was not the best option for the African nation
MATTHEW HALL
A
s soon as the scars were starting to heal, as soon as the memories were starting to fade, Western imperialism is once again demonstrating its ability to exploit the Third World for its own political needs. The familiar combination of jackboots and oppression is still alive, thus enforcing on Mali the subjugation from which it fought to escape. In order to garner support for the intervention in Mali, the main message has been about the Islamist wish to destroy stability and democracy in the region. And so far, this ever-reliable threat has proved to be effective. However, it must be taken into consideration that Western forces are fighting on behalf of a junta that seized control of Mali through a military putsch in March 2012. Restrictions on the press have been applied since the interven-
tion, and such support for an undemocratic régime is an antithesis to the ideals of the Arab Spring. It is perhaps fitting that neither David Cameron nor François Hollande sought
“There is a solution to the instability in the region, but it will not arise as a result of foreign troops ” a parliamentary vote for this operation. On top of that, there is an eagerness to portray the conflict as a success, despite the clear evidence that it is not going as smoothly as intended. News reports broadcast images of celebrations at
every further military advance yet this masks the growing humanitarian crisis; more than 150,000 Malians have been forced to flee to neighbouring countries in order to escape the fighting, and Amnesty International has strongly condemned the behaviour of the Malian army which has been accused of executing citizens suspected of having links with the rebels. A French air strike killed five people, three of whom were children, and this introduces an element of doubt about the reported ease of victory during the intervention. Moreover, there is a strong possibility that the operation will descend into a bloody stalemate, with both sides suffering needless casualties. The departure of the rebels to the northern areas of Mali may signal a temporary end to the conflict but this phase appears to be a brief lull in the storm, for there is no doubt of the animosity felt towards Western forces. As a result of the forays in Iraq and Afghanistan, as well as other imperialistic ventures, suspicion is rife over the real motives for the intervention, even more so given the abundance in Mali of natu-
ral resources such as uranium, magnesium and gold. It is impossible to ignore the backlash in Africa and the Middle East in recent years, with the hostage crisis in Algeria in January an indication of the extent of this hostility. There is a solution to the instability in the region, but it will not arise as a result of foreign troops. The first step would be the removal of French soldiers from Mali, since the colonial legacy has contributed to the country’s political and economic intransigence. South Africa’s role in restoring a democratic process to the previously war-torn Madagascar shows how the continent’s problems can be solved internally, rather than through Western interference.
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A step towards the status quo After the House of Commons passed an act which will allow Equal Marriage, Leigh Wilson gives us his views on why it is a move in the right direction for society LEIGH WILSON
L
ast Tuesday, MPs voted in favour of the Marriage (Same Sex Couples) Bill by a strong majority of 400 to 175. Although the passage of the bill is by no means over as it must still progress through the House of Lords, this result was a significant step towards the opening of civil marriage ceremonies to all couples in England and Wales, regardless of gender. This change would also allow individuals to legally change their gender without having to first end their marriage, and couples in an existing civil partnership could convert this to a civil marriage. Civil partnerships are legally almost identical to civil marriages in terms of the rights seen as important to many couples such as inheritance, pension and next of kin. However, the fact remains that a civil partnership is, fundamentally, not a marriage. Civil partnerships do not hold the same international recognition as marriages. Couples in a civil partnership cannot legally refer to themselves as ‘married’, and may not use the terms ‘husband’ or ‘wife’. Civil marriage is a secular union and so why should it not be open to all couples, regardless of gender? Society’s concept of marriage has moved on from the archaic perceptions of a bond solely to facilitate procreation. Marriage represents the strongest commitment between two people made public which provides stability to both the couple and society. As many of the MPs speaking in favour of the bill echoed, we should be encouraging as many couples as possible to undertake this commitment. An opinion poll conducted in 2009 for The Times showed 61% of the British
EQUAL MARRIAGE Image: Fibonacci Blue (Wikimedia)
“The fact remains that a civil partnership is, fundamentally not a marriage” public agreed with the statement, “Gay couples should have an equal right to get married, not just to have civil partnerships”. However, the demographic break-
down of this response paints a clear picture of the divide surrounding this issue. Just 37% of over-65s agreed with the statement, compared with 78% of those aged between 25 and 34. For me these results ring true as the majority of my peers, both straight and gay, had no problem with the bill – indeed many asked why anyone would argue against it. This generational gap was just as evident in the Commons, where those speaking against the bill were by majority about twenty years senior to those speaking in favour. With a free vote, debate amongst the MPs was lively. Faith was frequently cited as an argument against equal marriage. However, ministers have provided strong legal protection within the
bill to ensure no religious premises will forced by law to conduct ceremonies they oppose. As a gay man, I watched in disbelief as debate raged around whether or not I should have the right to a civil ceremony which my heterosexual peers – from whom I consider myself no different – already enjoy. Ultimately, the result of this vote does not represent the apocalypse that so many are shouting about. It is, in my opinion, simply a matter of the law catching up with the perceptions already held by our generation and I applaud those who stood up on Tuesday – male and female, straight and gay – and argued in favour of much-needed change.
SIMON HARWOOD
AM I GOING MAD?
#1: Why Instagram must die It’s been claimed that the spread of social media in recent years has resulted in a rise in narcissistic tendencies amongst young people who use services like Facebook and Twitter. This isn’t surprising, but what has really startled me recently is the unbelievable degree of amour-propre the photosharing site Instagram encourages in those who use it. The photo, as we know it, has changed. No longer is it something to cherish memories with or share with friends. Now, thanks to Instagram, and Mark Zuckerberg, who recently bought the company, the photo is a blunt object used to repeatedly bash others in the face in a desperate attempt to be recognised and admired. If, like me, you were already tired of people sharing their culinary creations with the world via Facebook, now you’ll log on in perpetual fear of being forced to gaze upon a friend’s home-made organic cookies (who actually enjoys LOOKING at food anyway?). Instagram demands that your photo be the best thing you’ve ever created, your life’s worth in a photo that must be shared with everyone on the planet, regardless of whether they wish to see your coq-au-vin. I can understand the fascination, maybe, in kids. But the incredible amount of self-worth and arrogance it generates in otherwise normal human beings is fascinating, and slightly depressing. There is no shame, either. A Louis Vuitton handbag is not a Louis Vuitton handbag unless the world knows how much you’re spoilt by your parents and appreciates how arty you’ve been in slightly filtering the photo automatically. Christmas and New Year seems to bring out the worst in this disgusting and embarrassing egotism, although any event where alcohol is involved usually brings some particularly grandiose creations. Your newsfeed will have been amok with various Christmas lunches, seemingly in competition for absolute perfection. Nor will you have escaped the hideous vanity at New Year’s; snaps of morons clutching bottles of champagne, no doubt paid for by their parents (usually accompanied by an equally boring ‘hashtag’, the universal indicator of unapologetic selfism and absurdity). I suppose this is all unnecessary annoyance; I could simply leave Facebook and Twitter, or disengage from the internet all together. But I worry about what kind of person this culture of selfaggrandisement is creating. Will generations of teenagers grow up believing celebrating their new Jack Wills gilet through the internet is a legitimate form of expression? And has Instagram created this problem, or are there really thousands of kids out there growing up desperately seeking an outlet to alert the world to their newly-achieved abs and bikini shots? Instagram has supplied millions of idiots and egomaniacs with the means to provide photo evidence that they are, indeed, idiots and egomaniacs. Do us a favour and don’t encourage them.
14.features
Monday 11 February 2013
There’s something about Mhairi
In a bid to reclaim the honour of the once-noble rom-com genre, Editor Ben Travis caught up with Nottingham-based journalist and novelist Mhairi McFarlane to discuss Mr Darcy, ill-advised student traffic light parties and why Bella Swan makes a dreadful heroine The rom-com novel is such well-trodden ground – what made you want to pitch in your attempt at the genre? Well, a bit of heart and a bit of head is the answer. I love romances, I love comedies, I love romanticcomedies, so there was no cynicism in writing one. It’s what came naturally to me when I started tooling around with fiction. However, at the same time I wrote a novel-length thriller-y type newsroom drama in the mould of State Of Play, and when I tried shopping that initially, I got agents saying they liked it but weren’t sure where to ‘place’ it to sell it. And I realised two things: firstly, I was an impatient and skint person who wanted to get a book deal as fast as possible. Secondly, in tough and uncertain times for the publishing industry, with Amazon, Kindle and so on, getting them to take a chance on a debut is harder than ever. So shuffling the ‘chick lit’ (not my favourite term but sadly it has stuck) to the top of the pile and doing a very easily classifiable genre made complete sense. It might not be for someone else though, I hasten to add! The official advice is never to try to write ‘into’ a gap in market, it’ll show and it won’t sell. Think of the bestsellers around - some of them might get knocked by critics, but the authors always have a clear passion for the story they’re telling, and that enthusiasm communicates. How do you keep things interesting in a genre where people are not only aware of clichés but fully expect and seem to gain enjoyment from them? Erm, ooh. I hope I have kept people interested! I suppose it’s that old ‘write what you know’ chestnut - I saw a lot of chick lit about women in Notting Hill doing fantastical PR jobs and being courted by billionaire playboys and rock stars and blowing a month’s salary on a pair of designer high heels in shopping sprees, and to quote Morrissey, it said nothing to me about my life. I think you keep things interesting if you create believable, interesting, rounded characters with genuine dilemmas. And write good sparky dialogue. Friends With Benefits was a recent cinematic example of cracking rom com dialogue. To an extent, the two typical story arcs of romance fiction have both become clichés (either they get together, or they don’t but still end up stronger people after what they’ve been through) – how do you deal with that? It’s interesting to me that romance writers get this question levelled at them quite often, and yet it’s true of all genre. Jane Austen wrote six novels with this plot choice and did OK from it. Take James Bond - it’s not even a binary will they/won’t they outcome, you know he’s going to foil the villain and still be standing at the end! Yet you don’t get Cubby Broccoli asked how he can possibly sustain interest in this dude who always wins. (Wait, is Cubby Broccoli still alive? That would also prevent him being asked.) The answer’s in two things I think:
firstly, try not to make your outcome feel too preordained. Your dream is that the reader yearns for them to get together, but isn’t entirely sure they’re going to get that resolution and so the peril feels genuine. If your protagonists are coasting along, cooing and holding hands for the final third of the plot, you’ve probably effed up. There’s a very good reason why Tim and Dawn only kissed in the final instalment of The Office, and everyone loved it. And secondly, make the journey so much fun that the ending isn’t a dealbreaker. There you have a real difference with a thriller, I suppose - then, you stack chips against your big surprise. In romances, it’s more, you know what you’re probably getting, the suspense factor is much smaller, so other elements of enjoyment have to play a larger part. It’s like being strapped into a rollercoaster - unless things at Alton Towers go badly wrong, you’re going to be stepping off safely at the end, but human beings love the screaming and the bumps and thrills along the way. What’s your favourite terrible rom-com plot contrivance? My God this is a huge category! Ridiculous contrivance is the Hollywood rom-com stock-in trade isn’t it? You know as soon as you read the Cineplex precis: ‘Katherine Heigl is Kitty, a gorgeous ecologist devoted to her important work with Greenpeace. So she gets the shock of her life when Chad (Ashton Kutcher) dresses up as a seal as a stag do prank and...’ Do you know, I’m going with Andrew Lincoln and the massive cue cards telling Keira Knightley he loved her in Love Actually. What if the best mate husband, and not Keira, answered the door? WHAT THEN, RICHARD CURTIS? Answer comes there none. What would you say is the perfect ratio of ‘rom’ to ‘com’? Ah, well - not sure I can give you maths and percentages here but I’d say: you know it when you get it. I thought Easy A was a funny film and I love Emma Stone, but, it shortchanged the romance I felt. Don’t make a joke of your characters’ problems, don’t make a complete joke of the romance, I’d say - you have to be prepared to be called cheesy and make people care and have the fulfilling moment at the end that makes you go ‘ahhhh.’ The first Bridget Jones film got the balance spot on, I thought. The second Bridget Jones? There was no sequel, we do not speak of it in my house. You’ve spoken before about characters in ‘chick lit’ who have no grounding in reality – how important was it to you to have a believable heroine? Very. See earlier answer regarding chick lit cliches. I think the genre has had a surfeit of adorably batshit kookster klutzes with no money management skills, an overstuffed wardrobe and a weakness for men with huge bank balances. I don’t know that woman and I didn’t want my heroine to be someone alien to me - I’m pretty sure I’d have written her
The Courier
Stupid Cupid: McFarlane vs. rom-coms “Bella Swan doesn’t appear to have any decent female friends she respects and she’s ready to junk her relationship with her family to go and live as a sexy disco-marble mannequin with the Cullens.”
“Colin Firth [is the ultimate Mr. Darcy]. That isn’t even a question. In fact, I am slightly disgusted you asked.”
“The first Bridget Jones got the balance [of romance and comedy] spot on, I thought. The second Bridget Jones? There was no sequel, we do not speak of it in my house.” “Andrew Lincoln and the massive cue cards telling Keira Knightley he loved her in Love Actually... What if the best mate husband, and not Keira, answered the door? WHAT THEN, RICHARD CURTIS?”
The Courier
features.15
Monday 11 February 2013
very badly as a result. Also, I wanted Mr Wrong to be someone we didn’t root for her to be with, but, we could plausibly see why she had once fallen for him. Whenever the outgoing love interest is either very wet or very nasty, I think ‘hmm, doesn’t say much for her if she was with him.’ It’s all part of a habit of making a heroine a spotless angel whose only crimes come through being misunderstood. And choosing Manchester (where I went to university) as a setting was also about realism: rom-coms are so often West London, Dublin or New York. I wanted my story to feel real and break some of the accepted conventions. Which ditzy rom-com character have you most wanted to give a good shake and stern life-chat? I don’t know if she counts as rom-com, though they are romances, but Bella Swan in Twilight’s a bad scene. She doesn’t appear to have any decent female friends she respects and she’s ready to junk her relationship with her family to go and live as a sexy disco-marble mannequin with the Cullens. And her plot efficacy always involves her deciding to either self-harm or kill herself. The nadir for any feminism was that line between Edward and Jacob - ‘If I get her back in less than perfect condition...’ Woah. I don’t think art has to be saddled with a message, but, the themes that emerged over the course of the saga were slightly worrying. In Young Adult fiction, I think Katniss in The Hunger Games was a far more go-getting, less male-dependent example of a heroine. Who are your chick-lit character and author heroines? Chick lit character heroine - if it’s chick lit, then Elizabeth Bennett in Pride & Prejudice, without a doubt. I absolutely love her to bits. And not only
is she principled, smart, unimpressed by status, original, witty, proto-feminist - she’s not perfect, either. She is guilty of pride and prejudice herself and that mirroring of flaws and culpability between the leads is so much more like life, and satisfying. And again, not sure if it’s chick lit but Emma Morley in David Nicholls’ One Day gave me that ‘oh my God you see into my mind’ feeling of a character that’s so well observed and subtly, sympathetically drawn that she just leaps off the page. David Nicholls is a hero of mine and smart as a weasel. Other authors: Marian Keyes is a wonderful natural storyteller, as is Lisa Jewell, who laid down a marker in Ralph’s Party for a more urban, realistic, British type of romance.
1940s snarky type of Rosalind Russell dame, in an amazing dress. And Mindy Kaling. She was in the US version of The Office and I based Mindy in You Had Me At Hello on her.
Of all his screen incarnations, who makes the ultimate Mr. Darcy?
When you were writing You Had Me At Hello, to what extent did you have an audience in mind and how did male readers factor into that?
Colin Firth. That isn’t even a question. In fact, I am slightly disgusted you asked. Those Valentine’s Day and New Year’s Eve megacast rom-coms were shocking… who would be in your ultimate rom-com cast? Splurgh, they were three-flush turds weren’t they? Brilliantly skewered by 30 Rock in the Martin Luther King Day spoof. Getting to choose an ensemble? Hmmm first, Robb Stark from Game Of Thrones. Why? Check out the Fuck Yeah Robb Stark Tumblr then ask me why. Karl Urban. He’s anti rom-com and would bring a bit of jaw-clenching grit. Daniel Kitson, the Yorkshire comedian. I’d like to see his shambolic schtick and huge beard on the big screen. Women: Dobby from Peep Show. She’s so loveable, she’s nice without being sugar, she’s quirky without being nause. Sophie Ellis Bextor in her acting debut. I’m sure she’s got more she’s yet to show us, as it were. You can imagine her being a proper
You Had Me At Hello harks back to university romances… what was your cringiest uni romance experience? Cringiest uni romance experience, going to a traffic light party - you know, dress green for go, amber for maybe etc - with a boyfriend, both of us in red. Bit of a presumption we were going to get jumped otherwise. What a pair of twats *very sad face emoticon*.
I don’t think any writer, or in commercial fiction at least, writes with no audience in mind, even if it’s just the first person you’re going to show the manuscript to. But that advice about pleasing yourself first is so crucial, you have to enjoy the story you’re telling, that’s the only reliable measure of quality you ever have. Male audience: I don’t think I kidded myself this was a book that was going to immediately appeal to men, but, equally I never ever once thought: “Ah, this naff tampon joke is fine cos it’s only womens’ fiction”. I aimed - not saying I succeeded - to write chick lit with a proper sense of humour. I have a bee in my bonnet that advertisers and the media sometimes like to pretend men and women find different things funny, and I think the difference is not very great at all. I have some brilliantly clever female friends and they make men laugh, there’s no gender divide in the pub. Funny is funny.
So, book one is done and you’ve made your case for how a ‘chick lit’ novel should be done… where to go with Book Two? I made a case?! *checks* Haha, thank you. Book Two is called Here’s Looking At You and once again features someone with something in her past she has to resolve to move forward - this time it’s being very badly bullied. It’s set in London this time, though not a ritzy part - grimy London and hipster London. The theme of the book is about appearances and being judged on them and the importance we place on image, and London felt right for that. It surely has the greatest concentration of show-offs in Britain. That’s just fact. Have you been up to Newcastle before? What, in your mind, screams ‘Geordie romance’? I can exclusively reveal I will definitely be setting at least part of a future romance in Newcastle, and fancy writing a Geordie heroine. I have been up to Newcastle, though not for years, as two of my best friends went to Newcastle University. I thought it was an absolutely amazing city, so friendly, so lively, and architecturally, so attractive. I was really taken aback at how handsome it was. How does Mhairi McFarlane ‘do’ Valentine’s day? I used to go out, until I noticed the prices are a rinse and the two-per-table restaurants all have a weird stilted atmosphere. Plus I’m scarred by the experience of seeing a couple I knew across a dining room, waltzing over to say hello when a few glasses of wine to the good, and realising I’d interrupted a break up conversation. Oh woe. So the tradition me and my boyfriend have is God’s own dinner - curry and cava - and my choice of film on pay-per-view. Thinking Dredd 3D will do nicely.
16.fashion
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Fashion Editors: Elissa Hudson and Lizzie Hampson Online Fashion Editor: Sally Greenwood
Sweet to seductive
Nicole Stevenson gives us a run down of the high street’s best underwear for Valentine’s Day
Bra: £16, Next Briefs: £6, Next
Bra: £11.99, New Look Briefs: £4.99, New Look
Bra: £27.50, M&S Briefs: £17.50, M&S
Bra: £50, House of Fraser Briefs: £30, House of Fraser
The soft peachy floral print on this stylish set whispers a thousand romantic sweet nothings. The bralet highlights the feminine ‘V’ shape of your torso and the deep cut in the top flatters your assets. This is a good choice for a first Valentine’s together, as the cute modesty of this set gives it a sense of mystery.
This lingerie set sits comfortably between sweet and sexy. The fusion of pink and navy create an impressive contrast to the eye whilst he detailing such as the fine embroidery and the gathering of the material adds girliness to the set. On the whole, you’ll look like total eye-candy in this safe but sexy choice.
This M&S set consists of flirty French knickers and alluring simplicity – a recipe for a classy Valentine’s night. It isn’t giving too much away, so you can feel and act super-confident and sexy. You know you can trust the quality of the brand and because black is a neutral colour, this is a good investment for more than one romantic encounter.
The phrase ‘less is more’ springs to mind as this raunchy set equips you to professionally seduce your partner in crime for a sleepless Valentine’s evening. The passionate red is balanced with delicate fabric, which creates a soft touch to the design. Your lucky partner will be on cloud nine if you have the confidence to pull this one off.
Are you missing something?
An nS um me
rs, £12
Does the thought of crotchless knickers make you hot under the collar or want to head for the hills?
NO James Simpson I was asked to write about the cons of crotchless knickers. As a man, I decided some research was needed so, after test driving a pair, I found one major flaw; everything of mine just seemed to slip through the gap, not ideal. Obviously I’m joking, but seriously what is the big appeal? I mean there’s nothing wrong with spicing things up a bit, but crotchless knickers are most definitely not the way to achieve that. The way I see it, if you’re going to do the deed, to then not be bothered to take her knickers off is really just pure laziness. If I’m looking at it from a woman’s point of view, I can imagine that it gets a bit chilly down there. After a quick Google search (not to be advised unless you want to see more than you bargained for) one website even suggests they were designed
for hygiene reasons, which I’ve heard can often be quite an issue… Another problem brought to mind when considering crotchless knickers is the harsh reality of chafing. Chafing anywhere on the body is never good, and it’s even worse down there (so I’m told). Therefore surely these crotchless inventions have the potential to cause some serious discomfort due to the thin nature of them, meaning they’re hardly a viable choice of everyday underwear. All in all crotchless panties may seem like a good idea initially, but in reality they’re definitely a nogo. So this Valentine’s Day ladies, leave the crotchless knickers out of your Ann Summers online basket and maybe opt for something that matches your carpet because after all, that is inevitably where your underwear will end up!
YES Amy Macauley After intense research on the topic (e.g. looking at far too many bums than is normal for a Wednesday afternoon), I have decided that I’m officially not entirely against crotchless underwear. Admittedly, they do kind of overrule the point of underwear, i.e. covering an area that hopefully only a very select few usually see, but they can definitely have many benefits, and not just in the area you’re all thinking of. As a keen playsuit wearer, it seems there can be benefits to choosing crotchless underwear. It means completely cutting out the middleman after the intense struggle to take off your playsuit in Sinners, whilst keeping your bum as warm as possible. The more obvious benefits are clearly all in favour of time saving strategies, so if any lucky Jesmond-dwellers have had a little ‘quality time’
against a wall whilst there is no heating on then I’m sure the benefits of having a warm behind could appear to be pretty appealing. Carpet burn could be another potential pitfall which crotchless underwear could overcome, thereby saving the wearer many an uncomfortable lecture. With plastic surgery on the rise, this slightly more risqué form of underwear has the potential to hide those liposuction scars from a new ‘friend’ without them being any the wiser, and having the added benefit of them thinking you’re a bit wild. All in all, crotchless underwear isn’t for the faint -hearted, and it’s true that some may be intimidated by the sight, but I say go for it, and if all else fails it can always be used to guarantee you will have a hilarious story in your next game of ‘Never Have I Ever’.
The Courier
fashion.17
Monday 11 February 2013
thecourieronline.co.uk/fashion c2.fashion@ncl.ac.uk | @Courier_Fashion
What to wear on Valentine’s Day
Whether you’re braving it on the Legends dance floor, having a cosy night in with the girls or being taken out for dinner, Daisy Ridley, Claire McNiffe and Sophie Main have an outfit for the occasion
Date
Blouse: E1 London Clothing Boots: Topshop Jeans: Levis The outfit I have chosen is perfect if your boyfriend is taking you out for a romantic meal. It’s Valentine’s Day, so quite appropriately I have chosen something red. This loose fitting pussy bow blouse is the perfect item to wear at dinner. It means you can stretch and have that dessert without feeling self-conscious as your blouse flatteringly sits in all the right places. It’s a must have item in your 2013 wardrobe. You can’t go wrong with a blouse teamed with classic black skinny jeans to keep your legs warm on a cold and windy Toon night. And finally, the shoes. Simple and understated black ankle boots with a western style add a bit of edge to what is otherwise a very girly outfit. Daisy Ridley
Night Out
Night In
Sophie (left):
Emma (right):
Shirt: Republic
Dressing Gown: M&S Pyjama Shorts: M&S
Jumper: Mango Pyjama Bottoms: M&S
Skirt and Belt: Urban Ourfitters
For those of you that are planning a more chilled Valentine’s evening, staying in with friends, ordering your favourite takeaway and watching a DVD (probably Bridget Jones), the dress code for the evening is comfort. So if replacing your blistering high heels with cosy slippers and the ‘I can’t eat when I wear this’ dress with your fluffy one-piece sounds ideal, here are a few other ways to rock a night in style. After all, it is best to be comfy for the booze-fuelled night of ex-boyfriend effigy burning ahead. I’m joking (sort of).
‘I like this outfit because it is warm and cosy’ - Sophie ‘Being from Scotland I virtually live in jumpers every day, so Valentine’s is no exception’ - Emma Claire McNiffe
Clutch and Shoes: Topshop Regardless of the motivation for your Valentine’s night out, this outfit works. The pearl detailing on both the shirt collar and the heels combined with the fresh colour pallet of the outfit reflects the romance of the day. Whether you are out searching for a Valentine, or plan to dance away the last few hours of the dreaded day, you don’t want anything knocking you down, so stand firmly in these gorgeous black Topshop shoes. With their chunky pearl and diamante-embellished heel, they are feminine but sturdy. The A-line skirt is a pretty option for all shapes and its paisley pattern is bang on trend for the coming spring. Teamed with a floral clutch you can embrace the brave but brilliant clashing prints trend. Sophie Main
The Courier
beauty.19
Monday 11 February 2013
Beauty Editors: Amy Macauley, Lizzie Hampson Elissa Hudson & Sally Greenwood
Treat Yourself
Whether you love it or hate it, thanks to Hallmark Valentine’s Day is everywhere. But fear not, here are three beauty products to ensure you look good whatever your Valentine’s Day plans are.
thecourieronline.co.uk/beauty courier.beauty@ncl.ac.uk | @Courier_Beauty
Valentine’s make up tutorial
Valentine’s Day is just around the corner and whether you’re heading out with your friends or planning something special, choosing your make up can be just as hard as choosing your outfit. Hannah Walsh helps us out
Look one: Sweet
Romantic dinner This cute limited edition eye shadow palette from Marks & Spencer is perfect for that dinner date. The soft pastel colours are pretty and girly, and make a change from the standard smoky eye. Even better, it’s handbag sized and comes with a mirror so that’s one less thing to remember, and at £8.50, who could resist?
Products used: Bobbi Brown Brow Gel Urban Decay ‘Cherry’ Eyeshadow Mac ‘Naked Lunch’ Eyeshadow Benefit ‘Big Beautiful Eyes’ Palette Laura Mercier Oil Free Foundation Primer Nars Sheer Glow Foundation in ‘Mont Blanc’ Rimmel Wake Me Up Concealer Laura Mercier Secret Camouflage Concealer Rimmel Stay Matte Powder Soleil Tan de Chanel Cream Bronzer Mac ‘Launch Away’ Blush Nars ‘Super Orgasm’ Blush
Girly night in Having a girly night in? Wine? Check. The Notebook? Check. Nibbles? Check. If this sounds like a familiar Valentine’s Day for you single girls out there then why not add these tropical face masks to the mix? New to Superdrug at the bargain price of 99p and currently on offer at 3 for 4, there are plenty to go around. There is a variety of scents, but the four pictured are my favourites. Take this opportunity to put white chocolate on your face whilst not gaining any weight, and come out with beautiful skin, all in the name of cupid.
Now, for you brave gals out on the pull why not try these luscious lashes from Superdrug? Draw the boys in with the ‘Intense Volume’ lashes or flutter your eyes with the ‘Natural’ lashes. At 2 for £7.99 you and the girls can try them out and see who gets that gorgeous guy on the dance floor.
Daisy Ridley
2
Run a small amount of brow gel through the brows for a natural finish. Apply a light pink shadow all over the base of the lid and work a light brown shadow into the socket to give the eyes some definition. Apply some brown eyeshadow along the bottom lash line and use a bit more of the pink on the inner corners of the eyes.
3
Lightly contour the face and apply a subtle blush to the apples of the cheeks. Apply two coats of mascara and a little highlighter to the cheekbones to give a natural glow. Use a natural stain on the lip followed by your favourite gloss.
Look two: Seductive
Products used: Laura Mercier Oil Free Foundation Primer Nars Sheer Glow Foundation in ‘Mont Blanc’ Rimmel Wake Me Up Concealer Laura Mercier Secret Camouflage Concealer Rimmel Stay Matte Powder Bobbi Brown Brow Gel Benefit ‘Big Beautiful Eyes’ Palette Mac ‘Cranberry’ Eyeshadow Maybelline Gel Eyeliner Soleil tan de Chanel Cream Bronzer Benefit ‘Coralista’ Blush Nars ‘Super Orgasm’ Blush Ellis Faas Lip Pen
Out on the pull
1
Apply a moisturiser onto clean skin and follow with a primer to ensure your makeup lasts throughout the evening. Using your fingertips, work your foundation into the skin, concealing any blemishes and applying a brightening concealer under the eyes. Powder only over blemished areas to give the skin a dewy finish.
1
Again, apply a moisturiser onto clean skin and follow with primer. Using a stippling brush, work your foundation into the skin, then conceal any blemishes and apply a brightening concealer under the eyes. Powder the skin to set your base.
2
Fill in the brows with a pencil to give a more defined look. Apply a bronze shadow to the lid, working a darker shade into the crease of the lid to give some definition and run this same colour along the bottom lash line. Use a cranberry shade for an alternative smokey eye look, and run this colour along the bottom lash line and into the crease of the lid.
We heart nail art
Give a subtle nod to Valentine’s Day this year by trying your hand at some simple yet effective nail art Creating heart nail-art is extremely simple when you have the correct tools. All you need is a hair grip, or a sewing pin with a rounded end that will form a circle and act as a ‘dotting’ tool. You will also need something with a sharp end – a sharpened pencil or a cocktail stick will work well. First apply a base-coat, and then apply the colour of your choice. Once you have your base colour you can start painting on your hearts. Using the rounded end of the hair grip dipped into a different coloured nail polish, you need to place two dots next to each other to form the top of the heart. Place these dots slightly above the centre of the nail.
Next, place one more dot in the centre underneath the two you have already made. The less nail polish on the end of your hair grip, the smaller your hearts will be. Then, use your cocktail stick or pencil to move the nail polish into the point of the bottom of the heart and create a perfect heart shape. Repeat this on all of your nails. Alternatively, you can paint hearts on just one or two to create a subtle Valentine’s accent nail. Once your hearts are dry, use a top-coat to ensure longevity and give your nails a smooth, shiny finish. Rebecca Gregory
3
Apply a gel liner along the bottom water line and follow with lashings of mascara to create a dramatic effect. Contour the face and apply a deeper blush onto the apples of the cheeks. Highlight the brow bone, cheekbone and down the center of the nose. Finish with a deep red stain on the lips, and for even more drama, apply gloss over the top.
20.lifestyle
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Lifestyle Editors: Catherine Davison and Ellie Cropper Online Editors: Rosie Devonshire and Colette Hunter
How to: buy a Valentine’s Day present 14 February is fast approaching. Use our guide to find your Valentine the perfect prezzie...
Indie
I can’t stand how mainstream Valentine’s Day is and so does my boyfriend (he’s in a band), so I decided to think out of the box and just search ‘vintage’ on eBay and chose the most quirky thing that came up. My boyfriend already has about 14 retro Casio watches so I decided to get him a vintage camera. He’s really into photography. He says I’m his muse. I don’t think the one I’ve ordered works but it looks great. It comes with a leather case too which is all scratched. I know he’ll love it.
He hates Valentine’s Day - it’s too mainstream
START
What kind of guy are you buying for?
Photography: Flickr Kenleewrites
Geeky Uh oh, going to have to put some thought into this one Geek chic
He has all the DC comic books. He has all the Marvel comic books. He has them in limited editions. He even knows which side of the feud he sits on (he’s a Marvel man). He has The Avengers, Spiderman, TMNT (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles – but I don’t need to tell you that, as his girlfriend you most definitely know this already) and Batman action figures. Limited editions. He has all DVDs regarding Star Wars, Star Trek and Doctor Who. In limited collectors editions. All that’s left is you, dressed up as Princess Leia, limited edition.
Photography: Flickr Clevercupcakes
Smart
So Hugo and I decided that we should set a budget of £250 this Valentines as things just got way out of hand at Christmas. Hopefully he’ll end up spending more though, he’s so generous. It’s been mini break galore for the whole 9 and a half weeks (ish) that we’ve been dating. Might get him a Rolly (Rolex) with our initials engraved on the back. My parents said they’d make up the difference. Cosmo let it slip at Happy Hour @ Blanc that Hugo’s planning a little trip to Val d’Isere. Slightly predictable but it’ll be so nice to get away.
How much are you going to fork out?
He really doesn’t need anything There’s pressure to impress
The guy with everything Money’s no object More than I want to
From the England Rugby shirt to the iPhone the boy has all his heart desires. The right clothes, the right toys and you, the right girl who has probably made a generous contribution to his ‘I have everything’ fund over the couple past birthdays, Christmas’s and anniversaries. So what do you get him this Valentine’s Day? The key to giving a gift to someone who has no material needs left is to give them something no one else can have. A home cooked meal, a handmade card, cleaning their room, breakfast in bed. Or quite simply, you. What else could your man need for Valentine’s?
I don’t want to come over a cheap skate... but I’m skint
I don’t even know him that well
Photography: Flickr Moonlightbulb
Something a bit different?
Sporty
Well he is obsessed with sport
The perfect gift to treat your inexhaustible fella this Valentine’s Day could be found with a ticket for two to experience Go Ape! Just to remind him how sexy you really are, slip into your slinky sweat pants, and borrow your brother’s oldest Nikes because things are guaranteed to get dirty! Witness your wildest fantasies as your Tarzan comes to rescue his Jane, with zip wires, swing bridges and tree-climbing galore! And why not make the most of Northumberland’s greenery; pack up the Champagne (Cava) and strawberries for an alfresco experience even in the unlikely event that it rains. This is a small thanks for his persistent loving kindness (most of the time!).
The new boyf
Fear no more! Forget the hours you have probably wasted pondering over the usual questions, ‘How much do I spend?’, ‘Do I look too keen?’, ‘Will this suggest marriage!?’ As though the dreaded ‘L’ word isn’t bad enough! The answer is simple. In the small period you may have known him, rack your brains to remember all those little things he’s mentioned that he likes, whether it’s a certain chocolate bar, a film, a homemade voucher for his favourite subway, all combined to create his perfect hamper! This is a pain free yet thoughtful gesture that balances fun and care without the lashings of poetry and eternal love. However, considering the occasion, a sprinkling of red bows and love hearts won’t do any harm!
Words: Katie Smith, Ellyn Bramley, Georgina Bankier
The Courier
sex&relationshipslifestyle.21
Monday 11 February 2013
Blind Date
thecourieronline.co.uk/lifestyle c2.lifestyle@ncl.ac.uk | @Courier_Life
Michael Rowan, 2nd Year History meets Melanie Boulton, 3rd Year Politics
Michael on Melanie
Melanie on Michael
What’s your usual type? I wouldn’t say I had a type, in fact I’ve never really thought about it. I guess I’d just hope we’d get on well.
What’s your usual type? I don’t really have a type but they would need to be funny and confident in themselves.
First impressions? I noticed how nice she looked, she had made and effort with her appearance and she had really nice eyes. I was bricking it though so I was a bit distracted.
First impressions? He was very well dressed and on time, but he was very nervous which came over straight away.
Any funny conversation topics? We talked about music taste, and what we were doing on our courses. There weren’t any particularly weird topics, although she did say she hadn’t had much sleep the night before so I’ll let her off. What was her most attractive quality? She was really kind, especially because it was the first proper date I’ve ever been on. What was her worst trait? It sounds weird but the fact that she was a dog lover, because I had a bad childhood experience with them. Did you open the x-file? No, and I never thought to ask on a first date! At any point did you understand why she was single? No, anyone would be lucky to have her. Were you tempted to lean in for a kiss? No, I think it’s too soon, although I got her number so who knows! Would your parents approve? Well seeing as I’ve never taken anyone home before they wouldn’t have much to compare her to, but I guess so. What would your ideal date be? Something casual, a few drinks or maybe the cinema because I could always slip my arm round her.
Any funny conversation topics? We talked about our interests and he talked about history because that’s what he’s studying. I felt as though I did most of the talking, I was trying to help him out because he was really nervous. What was his most attractive quality? He was a real gentleman, he bought me all my drinks. What was his worst trait? He didn’t have anything bad about him but I would say he was far too quiet and needed to have more confidence in himself. Did you open the ex-file? It didn’t come up, but I wouldn’t want to talk about it as my ex comes to this uni! At any point did you understand why she was single? Only because he was quite shy, he lives at home so maybe if he moved to a student area he would get more into that kind of lifestyle and have a confidence boost. Were you tempted to lean in for a kiss? No. I see us more as friends. Would your parents approve? Yes, he seems very polite and ambitious so I can’t see why they wouldn’t. What would your ideal date be? I’d like to go for a nice dinner and some drinks, I wouldn’t want anything too intense. Marks out of 10? I think a 7
Marks out of 10? I’d say 9
Unlucky in love? The Courier is here to help! Send your details to c2.lifestyle@ncl.ac.uk
Evie O’Sullivan University Challenges #1 - Valentine’s Day If you are as un-coordinated as me, you will know just how difficult it is to balance and keep all of your housemates happy on a day to day basis… let alone when Valentine’s Day comes along, spits out its dummy, and throws a heart-shaped gob stopper into the mixture. Now, I know for many guys, Valentine’s Day might pass you by without the blink of an eye, or maybe that’s what you want us to think? But let me tell you, as a single girl, I am fully aware of the self-depreciating and emotionally fatiguing nature of this day, and when you add potential Valentine’s Day house wars into the equation, you’re talking about a whole new level of despair. So brace yourself with chocolate, and arm yourself with tissues, because the battle of the ‘not so single’s’ and the ‘ready to mingle’s’ might not be so pretty this year! If you’re going solo this Valentine’s Day, remember to stick together with those alike and most importantly look after your own. Don’t be letting anyone creep up to their room to spend the whole night getting all emosh over ‘The Notebook’. Instead, get cosy on the sofa and gorge on everything chocolate covered, as let’s face it, you won’t be gorging on anything else this evening. And after all, you’re getting the whole lot pre-packaged, a girl’s dream…which means there certainly won’t be any hidden discoveries for you tonight. (Sock stuffing anyone?) Or, much to the dismay of your loved up house mates, you might be venturing into the Toon on this magical evening, set to find a gem among the Geordies. But please remember that sex shouldn’t cost money: even if trebles are ridiculously cheap, if you’re at the point of force feeding one another to the stage of oblivion, then it certainly won’t do any good for your performance or your bank balance. Besides, beer blinded loving is not the one. Trust me, it won’t be all hearts and roses by the time the morning has reared its head. When it comes to the couples and the ‘not so single’s,’ I know it is easy to mock and tease them about just how bad they have it...it might even make you feel a little bit better for a second. But in all honesty it’s not always as easy as it seems, and with two of my very best friends being in long distance relationships, I know first-hand just how gruelling and challenging it can be. So if the loved up ones are feeling a little lonely too, give them some extra loving, maybe even lend them your mood lighting so they can have a nice and intimate Skype convo with their beloved. And for all of those withboyfriends and girlfriends at unay, we all know that Valentine’s Day is not fit for a student budget, so help eachother out with makeshift treats and think outside the box…hey, maybe even clothing yourself with a box, and only a box, will go down as the perfect surprise?
22.lifestyle
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
thecourieronline.co.uk/lifestyle c2.lifestyle@ncl.ac.uk | @courier_life
BNOC knock...
Who’s there? Gareth Longstaff, Associate Lecturer in Media and Cultural Studies What is the worst experience you ever had at Uni while you were an undergraduate?
The Unmastered Art of Baking
White chocolate and pecan chocolate brownies
Today we’re making my deliciously gooey white chocolate and pecan chocolate brownies. I recently made them for my TCTV show, The Unmastered Art of Baking, and you can follow the video and watch my method step by step here: www.youtube. com/user/thecourieronline These brownies really are death by chocolate, but really easy to make and just so moreish! Use this recipe alongside my video to make these sumptuous delights. Ingredients: 2 eggs 140g plain flour 180g unsalted butter 330g light brown, or caster sugar 200g dark chocolate 100g white chocolate 100g pecans Cupcake cases Method: 1. Preheat your oven to 170 degrees and line a baking tin with greaseproof paper. 2. Put the chocolate and butter in a heat proof bowl over a recently boiled pan of water, put it on the hob and, stirring occasionally, melt the chocolate and butter until smooth and glossy. This is called a bain marie, and ensures that the chocolate doesn’t burn! 3. Add the sugar to the melted chocolate mixture. 4. Then sift the flour into a large mixing bowl, and add the chocolate, butter and sugar mixture. 5. Add your eggs, again one at a time to prevent curdling. 6. Now that your cake batter is complete, use two spoons to fill each cupcake case 2/3rds full. 7. Chop your pecans and white chocolate into chunky pieces. I like to leave reasonably large chunks to make the texture varied. 8. Add half of both to the batter, saving the other half for topping. 9. Put the batter into the lined tin, pressing into the corners and flattening the mixture. 10. Scatter the remaining nuts and chocolate on top - when baked this goes lovely and crunchy. 11. Put the brownies into the oven for 30 to 35 minutes, or until flaky on top, and coming away from the side (but make sure you don’t over bake so that we keep the lovely gooey centre). 12. Once baked, remove the brownies from the oven, and onto a cooling rack - although frankly speaking I like to eat them when still warm! 13. Cut into squares and enjoy! Fran Ede
Gareth Longstaff is a postgraduate lecturer in Media and Cultural Studies at Newcastle University. It is a great pleasure talking to Gareth, who was educated in Newcastle and received his Combined Honours degree at Newcastle University. Now he is back in Newcastle, working towards his PHD degree. At the same time, he works as a lecturer in the media department. He is a passionate academic, who specialises in cutting-edge theory in the fields of visual culture, sexuality, celebrity and psychology. On an unpleasantly windy day, after braving an unexpected shower of snow, I finally reach Gareth’s office; a cosy, attic-like space decorated with colourful collections of academic literature and posters. Instantly at ease in this relaxed working space, I kick-started the interview with some cheeky questions about his undergraduate memories…
Restaurant Review Raval Restaurant
Raval Restaurant is located on Gateshead Quays, just the other side of the iconic Tyne Bridge, its stunning view of the river marred only slightly by the busy road on which it sits. With my boyfriend’s birthday having just passed and my bank balance looking sadly under the weather, I had decided to use and abuse my position as Lifestyle Editor in order to give him what every boy wants for his birthday: free food. Being the sort of person who can’t eat his cereal without Reggae Reggae sauce and who prides himself on his prowess in drunken chilli-eating contests, he picked an Indian. With its romantic location and claims of authentic Indian dining, its spices shipped from India at the same time as supporting locally sourced meats and veg-
I felt a bit uncomfortable in Sociology lectures and seminars during my first year. At that stage, I don’t know why but I just felt so restrained in making academic readings, and fairly uneasy talking in a certain kind of way which was required in seminars. In the end I became so uncomfortable that I started trying to escape from getting involved in certain activities which we were supposed to be part of. When I look back, I can now see that I was just too absorbed in my study of art history and films then. Slightly guilty still but those artistic projects were so amazing and I couldn’t get enough of them! I tended to be quite self-indulgent though. That is the beauty of this Uni. There’s so many beautiful galleries just on your doorstep.
Tell me about why you decided to come back to Newcastle after your Masters at Goldsmiths, London. Well, I think that after tasting the initial excitement and hectic-ness of London life, it gradually wore off and I found that I had got to the stage where I was starting to crave some sense of stability. I also wanted to steadily progress in my chosen career. Newcastle seemed like the ideal choice, as it is a nice place to live. At the same time, I enjoy travelling around the local area as well; it is always nice gain a bit of distance in order to occasionally step back a bit.
So what about the exciting bits? Oh, so many, it’s difficult to remember! The social life, my own artistic projects, illuminating lectures, work placements, the fun of living away from home with your friends both in and out of student halls! I had quite a lot of free time to discover my interests at that time, which I felt extremely lucky for, and I still think is important for young people. And I still remember the thrilling summer holidays I spent in the US on an internship. I guess it was something I got out from my Uni education which inspired me to embark on independent explorations.
Lidan Deng Image: Flickr, jsawkins
Opening Times Mon-Sat 6pm-11pm Church Street, Tyne Bridge, Gateshead, NE8 2AT
etables, Raval Restaurant seemed the ideal choice. On arrival our coats were taken and we were seated by the bar and given a menu to select from, containing a wide variety of choice. Tastefully decorated, the atmosphere in the restaurant was relaxed and the service impeccable. After a brief chat with the very friendly manager, Avi, who insisted on ordering papadums and dips for us, our starter was ready and we were led to our table. The papadums were crunchy without being overly flaky, and the three dips of mint yoghurt, marinated carrots and pineapple were an unusual but creative variant on the standard mango chutney and worked well together. For the starter itself we shared the Pal Katti, a paneer, which was exquisitely cooked to create a
“Coconut, cumin and coriander complemented the dish perfectly, being mildly spicy and full of flavour” soft yet crisp texture, and whet our appetites well for the next course. For my main, I chose the Goan prawn curry, which when it arrived contained four of the largest king prawns I have seen in my life. The sauce of coconut, cumin and coriander complemented the dish perfectly, being mildy spicy and full of flavour. My boyfriend’s dish, the rogan josh, did not quite live up to the menu’s claims of its medium spiciness, although more than made up for this with sumptuously cooked, melt-in-the-mouth-it’sso-tender lamb and a rich meaty sauce. We also shared a side of Aloo Gobi, which, as someone allergic to raw potatoes (yes, I know), I eyed apprehensively; my fears were unfounded however, as the potatoes and cauliflower were cooked through and soft whilst avoiding mushiness, and agreeably flavoured with undertones of coriander. Despite being so full by this point that we both felt ill, we spotted jamun, a traditional Indian sweet dumpling, on the desserts menu and couldn’t resist. Served with vanilla ice cream and a sweet syrup, this was for me the highlight of the meal, and had it not been for the painful protests of my stomach I could probably quite happily have eaten a bowl full of these. With mains alone costing an average of £15, and its location on the other side of the Tyne Bridge, Raval won’t be a regular destination for the average student; but with Valentine’s Day, and, dare I say it, graduation looming ever nearer, it would definitely be the perfect place to take a date or the parents. It lived up to its claims of an authentic luxury Indian dining experience, the chef ’s intimate knowledge of Indian spices evident; for anyone looking to replace that dreaded Tikka Masala with a more genuinely Indian aroma of coriander, ginger and cumin, this is the place to go. Catherine Davison
The Courier
lifestyle.23
Monday 11 February 2013
Lifestyle Editors: Catherine Davison and Ellie Cropper Online Editors: Rosie Devonshire and Colette Hunter
This Never Happened to Ewan McGregor... #2 - “If it gets chilly, we can just spoon”
With Thom J. Asquith
Obviously all that lounging on beaches took its toll after a while, so we packed our bags and headed to Khao Sok, one of the oldest rainforests in the world, older than the Amazon according to the Lonely Planet. Our visit started well when, on our first evening, we discovered a Mutant Ninja Cockroach on the wall next to our bed. Fortunately our screams caused the guys in the neighbouring bungalow to run in so they became our knights in shining armour (or in Winnie The Pooh pyjamas as it happened) and got rid of it. The next day went much more smoothly. We booked a hiking trek in Khao Sok and ended up with a really great group of people. The place itself was absolutely stunning. It’s an unfathomably enormous lake with huge limestone islands surfacing 200 metres over the water. I felt like I was in Lord of the Rings as our longtail boat skimmed across the flattest expanse of water I have ever seen,
Tuesday, 3pm Arranged to meet George in town. There’s a comic book / wine and cheese / bring your own falafel afternoon tea party happening at Baltic 39, convinced him it would be a great promo opp for his new clubnight. Not his scene but I need someone to go with, way too embarrassing to turn up alone. Not seen him much since he moved to Jesmond, but it’s good to meet up with old mates from halls, find out how the other half live.
and I managed to creep people out by whispering ‘my preciousss’ in their ears. Apparently LOTR hadn’t reached Thailand by then. If you’re ever in Thailand, go to this place. It’s breathtaking. And the accommodation is brilliant too. We stayed in little floating raft-huts perched in a cove on the lake. So you woke up to stunning views and walked two steps out of your room and dived into this pristine, warm bath. They were extremely flimsily made though, which made it an interesting Russian Roulette as to whether you were going to put your foot through the floor at any moment, and at night the wind off the lake made it extremely chilly. The raft-houses also had free kayaks so we went exploring and I treated my sister and another girl to a spectacular cover of ‘Just Around the Riverbend’ whenever we got to a corner. The next day I proved (in case it was in any doubt) that I was no Pocahontas when we did another trek. In the forest after a bout of tropical rainfall and in some unwisely slippery trainers, I could not walk for more than 5 metres without slipping or falling
Hottie of the Week Jamie, 22 Interviewed by Emma Beaumont
Course: Geography Stage 3 Single / Taken? Single Describe your ideal girl Brunette and curvy - I don’t like girls who are too skinny. A girl who offers to pay for my drink would really impress me as well. Your most embarrassing moment? We got a noise complaint and the police arrived at our house, unfortunately at the exact moment that I’d come in from a night out and decided to strip naked on the kitchen table. I don’t think my peace offering of a cup of tea helped... What would you buy a girl for Valentine’s day? Jewellery and dinner. What’s your most attractive feature? I’m tall, dark and handsome! And your worst personality trait? I’m addicted to whisky...
over something. I would trip over vines that I’d just seen two people hit a second before and that I’d make a conscious effort to avoid, and I looked like I was snowboarding down the mountain instead of walking. It was smooth. Khao Sok also allowed us to meet elephants, which I’d been looking forward to for months. It didn’t disappoint. My first introduction to these amazing creatures was one of them coming over and prodding me gently in the back with his trunk. It was love at first nudge. Happily, the area they were kept was great too, a huge expanse of forest and plains where they lounged around, and when we rode on them, the elephants pretty much chose their own courses, which led to a lot of games of ‘duck the foliage’. Bizarrely and fantastically, it was on the back of one of these elephants that I got ‘The Call’ from the parents with A level grades. It was a rather surreal experience, riding an elephant in the middle of a Thai rainforest to find out that I’d be going to Newcastle. Christy Clemence
Trending Topics of the week #SixNations The Six Nations kicked off at the weekend, and it seems as if half of the country spent more time updating their Twitter than actually watching any of the rugby. #SuperBowl The Superbowl of 2013 saw the Baltimore Ravens take on the San Francisco 49ers in one of the most exciting Superbowls in recent memory. The commercials were slightly disappointing this year, even Samsung’s, despite starring my future husband Paul Rudd (oh, and Seth Rogen). #BeyonceBowl Ok, it may have been an exciting game, but many people were most excited by Beyonce’s half –time performance, and it wasn’t long before #BeyonceBowl was trending. Is there nothing that this woman can’t do? #VaVaVoom Although I may not have been able to remember exactly which car was being advertised, I can remember Thierry Henry and his ‘va-va-voom’ like it was yesterday! However, Renault’s attempt to promote their car on Twitter has been sabotaged by a load of Nicki Minaj fans getting their knickers in a twist. Thierry Henry or Nicki Minaj? I know who I’d choose. #RichardIII At first I thought that Shakespeare’s play, ‘Richard III’ was trending for some bizzare reason, but it turns out that a skull discovered in a car park could possibly be that of the real Richard III himself! TWEET OF THE WEEK: ‘Need to learn how to socialise sober’ @MarinasDiamonds - Don’t we all Marina, don’t we all… Grace Stephenson
4.15pm Contemplate heading in on foot, but I forgot my walking boots and my vintage Converse aren’t suitable for long-distance trekking. The bus is probably a better option. As soon as I cross the road the Number 1 comes hurtling round the corner. Missed the bloody thing. Pause to let some old ladies out of the coffee shop, figure there’s no rush now. Another bus flies around the bend. O Heaton Gods, you taking the piss? 4.25pm Still beats walking, so I set up camp at the bus stop. Could be in it for the long haul, should have brought my portable stove and camping provisions. Look around at the emptiness. The streets round here remind me of that song by The Specials, ‘Ghost Town’. Got it on 7” at Tynemouth market. 4.40pm Text from George: “Oioi, just getting the Metty from Wezzy Jezzy now, Monument in 5!!” Not sure I can break it to him that I might never get out of Heaton. Replied: “Alright mate, buses are being crap, be there ASAP (10 mins?) x” All lies. 5.10pm One more lost soul lingers at the bus stop. It’s the first person I’ve seen in ten minutes. Something’s moving in the distance. I squint; it’s a tumbleweed. And another one. Typical: you wait ages for a tumbleweed and two turn up at once. Still no buses. 5.15pm Need to kill some time, get my iPhone (3GS, old school) out. Load up insta, take a photo of the emptiness. Add an icy Hudson filter. #desolation. 5.35pm Still no bus. It’ll be evening soon. I’ve given up, time to trek across to the other end of Chilli Road to the Metro. Walking past Dixy Chicken, three Number 1s groan past me. This isn’t happening. 5.40pm iPhone buzzes, it’s George again. “You coming matey? Too many nerds here, one only took my flyer if I’d also buy their fanzine, need a hand. p.s. what’s a fanzine?” 5.55pm Get a pace on, almost at the Metro stop. Leg it down the mile-long slope to the platform, see the train approaching. Get a ticket. Worth it? Too late, bloody thing’s gone. Tannoy announcement: “This line is now closed for modernisation works. We apologise for any inconvenience caused.” 6pm Send a final text to George: “Another time mate. #heatonproblems.” Ben Travis Illustration: Daisy Billowes
24.listings11-17February
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Listings Editor: Sally Priddle
Monday
Tuesday
The Mousetrap
GIAG: Bollywood
The Mousetrap is famous around the world as being the longest running show of any kind in the history of British theatre - with over 23,000 performances it’s a play to be proud of. And to celebrate 60 incredible years on stage, it’s going on tour for the very first time ever with all all-star cast to give you a once-in-alife-time opportunity to see it at your own Newcastle Theatre Royal. Tickets from £11.50 available from Theatre Royal’s website or box office
Give it a Go are holding a taster lesson which consists of learning a routine to the latest Bollywood sound track while offering you the chance to meet members of the society and other lovers of the Bollywood dance scene. For more information email giag@newcastle.ac.uk
7pm Theatre Royal
5.30pm Students’ Union
Simon Munnery is Fylm-Makker 7pm The Stand Comedy Club
CEGsoc: Charity Pub Quiz 7pm Hyena Club
A charity pub quiz to raise money for WaterAid. £1 entry and all welcome. A night of quizzing and cheap cakes .
Experimenting with a tiny camera and big screen, Simon Munnery is Fylm-Makker. Presenting a beautiful mix of visual sketches, handcrafted animation, music and stand-up, all created and performed live on screen. This is “one of the most consistently original and imaginative minds in comedy” (The Guardian) at his most rewarding, enthralling and avant-garde best. Tickets £10.50 available from The Stand’s website or box office.
Wednesday Go Global: Valentine’s Day Card Making
2pm History Room, Students’ Union
Thursday
Train
7pm O2 Academy
Grammy Award-winning band Train will be touring the UK and Ireland in February 2013 playing material from their most recent UK top 10 album California 37. Tickets £23 available from o2 Academy’s box office and website
Take some time out of your day to make a card for your friends, family or special someone in your life and spread a bit of friendship, happiness and love. Free for students
Grease
13-15 February, 7pm Northern Stage
Danny and Sandy spend their summer nights falling in love, but back at school everything changes. In this ‘electrifying’ show, find out how they work out their differences. Tickets £12 available from Northern Stage website or box office
Homemade Jam 8pm MensBar
MensBar’s open mic night Homemade Jam is back! The standard rules apply: turn up, listen and play. It’s as simple as that – anyone is welcome, everyone that enters gets a free bottle and the best of the night will win a bottle of bubbly.
The Courier
11-17Februarylistings.25
Monday 11 February 2013
thecourieronline.co.uk/listings courier.listings@ncl.ac.uk | @Courier_Listings
Friday
The Coquet Collective: Burlesque Show 7pm Venue, Students’ Union
Stunning burlesque beauties, hunky boylesque, cabaret comedy & live singing, group dance numbers, hilarious comedy drag, special guests to be announced shortly vintage, craft, & jewellery stalls. Tickets from £5 available from Students’ Union Reception
Something for the weekend Example
16 February, 7pm MetroRadio Arena
Live fans should prepare for a huge show, with killer Example production and a succession of monster hits from ‘Watch The Sun Come Up’ and ‘Kickstarts’ to last year’s No.1 smash hits ‘Stay Awake’ and the massive ‘Changed The Way You Kissed Me’ as well as the recently released ‘We’ll Be Coming Back’ feature with Calvin Harris, ‘Say Nothing’ and more brand new tunes. Tickets £25 available from MetroRadio Arena’s website or box office.
Valentine’s Day Listings
Whether you are looking forward to the day or not, here are some suggestions of how to spend your day
Loved up? Tynemouth Beach
Romantic film
14 February Tyneside Cinema
Jean-Pierre Jeunet’s (Delicatessen) warm, romantic, totally feelgood movie is a much-loved Tyneside favourite and is definitely the perfect movie for Valentine’s night. Packed with off-kilter characters in a nostalgic, picture-postcard Paris, Jeunet has created a world in which we’d all like to live in. Follow the wonderful Amélie Poulain (Audrey Tautou, Coco Before Chanel) as she searches for the recipe for true love and the way to help others find happiness. Heartswelling cinema at its best.
The Metro pass is only £4.20, there is nothing more typically romantic than a walk along the beach (make sure you wrap up warm though, as Tynemouth isn’t exactly the Bahamas). Fish and chips at the infamous Marshalls, many many bars, the beautiful Priory and if that doesn’t persuade, there is also an aquarium. This is the kind of date that suits everyone and you will be getting credit for quite a while.
Canary Gold
15-16 February, 8pm Northern Stage
Malmsey wine: pure Canary gold - once the most sought-after tipple on the high seas, desired by European aristocracy and quoted by Shakespeare. In present day Canary Wharf, wine traders and investors gather. A rare Canarian wine has come up for sale. Is it the real thing or an elaborate forgery? As the mystery surrounding this dusty old bottle begins to unravel, judge for yourself who the real pirates are. This sharply observed and witty satire takes its inspiration from 500 glorious years of wine trade between the Canary Islands and the UK, at the same time taking a swipe at bankers and fraudsters. Tickets from £14 available from Northern Stage’s website or box office.
First Date? Johnny Kats and Neil Dougan 7pm The Hyena Comedy Club
Two of the fastest rising acts on the comedy circuit. Mixture of political satire, acute comical observations of everyday life and hilarious impersonations. The perfect light entertainment for a Saturday night. Tickets £12 available from The Hyena’s website or box office.
Jazz at the Hoochie Coochie Jazz is the perfect first date to show off
your cultural side, and after a few drinks you may even get to rock out some epic moves. Playing music from hard funk to solid soul to beautiful cool Jazz, this is more than just your average Newcastle bar. Open ‘til late and with an extensive cocktail menu, this is unique and luxurious perfect for your first date.
CCTV
11pm Venue, Students’ Union Need I say more?
Digital and Rub A Dub Dub present... Disclosure Two Inch Punch: Waze and Odyssey 11pm3.30am Digital
Tickets sold out online but are available from Beatdown records
X Factor Live
17 February , 7pm MetroRadio Arena
You’ve watched them in your living room, voted for your favourite on your phone, clapped along to their performances on the tap to clap app, now you have the chance to see the final seven stars of The X Factor perform live as they embark on The X Factor 2013 Live Tour. The top seven finalists performing on the tour are James Arthur, Ella Henderson, Jahmene Douglas, Rylan Clark, Christopher Maloney and groups Union J and District3. Tickets £32.50 available from Metro Radio Arena’s website and box office.
Beverley Craven
14 February The Sage
Performing all her hits from the ‘90s, this songster is back and ready to woo you as you attempt to woo your lucky date. Once again with a scaled down acoustic line up and stripped back production, Craven sings candidly about her experience of surviving breast cancer, her recent divorce and current affairs (not the political kind…). This is a show filled with nostalgia, unapologetically designed to make you laugh, cry and then buy her autobiography Truth Be Told that’s been 12 years in the making.
Forever Alone? Funeral For a Friend
14 February, 7pm Venue, Students’ Union
Conduit is the follow-up to 2011’s critically acclaimed Welcome Home Armageddon, and is a tightly wound collection of tracks bursting with emotion and personal conflict but also full of commentary on the inner workings and experiences of an established band. Joining the band on these dates are the excellent Such Gold and Daytrader from the US.
UEFA Europa League
14 February, 8pm St. James’ Park
Newcastle vs. FC Metalist Kharkiv Is there a better way to get over the thoughts of being single than cheering for your new home team? With cheap tickets available too, it is the perfect anti-Valentine’s Day event. Tickets from £15
26.arts
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Arts Editors: Lisa Bernhardt and Millie Walton Online Arts Editors: Grace Harvey
More than words: A lesson on the art of seduction from the ‘lads’ of their time Just in time for Valentine’s Day , the peak period for crafting love letters, Anya Thaker discovers there’s more to Mozart and James Joyce than symphonies and the stream of consciousness
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alletBoyz are back, jumping onto the stage for the next two months to spend a fourth season touring Britain with their incredible new show The Talent 2013. The allmale ballet company, initiated and led by former Royal Ballet lead dancers Michael Nunn and William Trevitt, have ten new exceptional recruits and have worked with internationally renowned choreographers Russell Maliphant and Liam Scarlett to create two invigorating and stunning dance pieces. The strength and originality found in their interpretation of contemporary ballet is helping to remove the negative stigmas attached to men in the industry and is leading them to international fame. The company’s use of film in their performances creates an intense drama and the combination of the two medias helps to make ballet more accessible for their audiences. Unfortunately, to see this explosive company BalletBoyz in their latest tour, Aberdeen is your closest venue. But, fear not – their rising fame means that Newcastle will definitely be seeing them very soon.
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uts to public arts funding by Newcastle City Council last year were 100%. Previously, £1.6m of the council’s annual budget was devoted to culture which, admittedly, was a fairly risible 0.7% of the overall budget, but nonetheless an essential aid to the survival of the arts in Newcastle. This decision to remove all support completely has left the arts community isolated and in danger of collapse, a surprising move when one considers that the arts have been Newcastle’s economic saviour during the last twenty years. Without the necessary funding, the vibrant arts found in Newcastle cannot continue to progress and, at the moment, the future of the arts culture looks bleak. Jennifer Hopps
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or the Casanovas amongst you who wish to write a love-sick, heart-wrenching confessional to your dearly beloved, inspiration may well be found in ‘The Love Letters of Great Men’. Aptly named the romantics, Byron, Shelley and Keats are synonymous with stolen glances, fluttering heartbeats and of course brooding in abundance. But the truth is in modern society, you would probably have more luck pulling if you poured a VK over someone’s head than trying to ‘compare thee to a summer’s day’. So why not take some alternative inspiration from ‘the lads’ of their day?
Lick my *** nicely Lick it nice and clean (Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart) You would be a fool for thinking that all those alleged ‘Great Men’ did was wistfully stare out of the window until they could once again be reunited with their beloved. Just because they didn’t have match.com or redtube doesn’t mean they weren’t privy to a bit of erotica every now and again. They say that ‘YOLO’ is carpe diem for morons, and they are right. Just because many lovelorn writers wore cravats, wigs and tights doesn’t mean they couldn’t give any of today’s Lads a run for their money when it comes to wooing the fairer sex. Andrew Marvell for example, wrote the infamous line: “Had we but world enough and time” in ‘To His Coy Mistress’, wishing for a lifetime of romance. When Marvell says, “your quaint honour turn to dust”, he means: you will not have your looks for forever so why don’t we get down to it when you aren’t a wrinkled old spinster and I still have the libido of an ox. Try that one next time you’re in Legends. In the vein of geniuses you didn’t know were perverts: Mozart. The same prodigy that wrote
Piano Concerto No 24 in C Minor also wrote a gem entitled ‘Leck Mich Im Arsch ‘or ‘Lick My ***’, a canon in B-flat Major sung by six people at a time, and followed it up with a delightful sequel called ‘Lick My *** Nice and Clean’ (translated): “Lick my *** nicely, lick it nice and clean, nice and clean, lick my ***. That’s a greasy desire, nicely buttered, like the licking of roast meat, my daily activity. Three will lick more than two, come on, just try it, and lick, lick, lick. Everybody lick his own *** himself.” Better yet, for the truly unashamed of you heed the words of James Joyce. Ulysses is undoubtedly a Modernist masterpiece and still has academics scratching their heads over its allusions and ambiguities. His letters to his love Nora Barnacle, however, are undisputedly more forthright with the sexual explications and would make E.L James (of 50 Shades of Grey fame) blush. “I am happy now, because my little ***** tells me she wants me to roger her ****ways and wants me to **** her mouth and wants to unbutton me and pull out my ****** and **** it off like a teat. More and dirtier than this she wants to do, my little naked ******, my naughty wriggling little *******, my sweet dirty little ******.” He wrote it and she loved it. They lived happily
ever after with 2 kids and a lifetime fascination with coprophillia (I’ll let you look that one up) and masochism. So if you do find yourself stuck for inspiration this valentines, put down the classic romantics and see how brilliant your betrothed one’s reaction is to a rendition of Mozart or a Joycian erotica telegram. It could lead to some interesting results.
Dance dance revo-Lausanne
Milli Atkinson discusses the esteemed dance competition and what it takes to be considered ballet’s best
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he Prix de Lausanne is an international dance competition held annually over a one-week period in January in Lausanne, Switzerland. It is a competition for young dancers of all nationalities aged 15 to 18 and the competition has earned its prestige for the unique opportunities it offers these young talented dancers in order to start their professional careers. The winners of the contest receive scholarships that allow them to complete their training for one year in one of the schools’ or professional dance companies’ partners of the Prix de Lausanne. Some of these partners include the acclaimed Canada’s Royal Winnipeg Ballet Company and Great Britain’s Central School of Ballet. The competition was launched in January 1973 by Philippe Braunschweig and his wife, Elvire. Their determination to launch the Prix de Lausanne was strongly influenced by Philippe’s recent acceptance of an invitation to become chairman of the non-profit organization, ‘fondation en faveur de l’art chorégraphique’. He strove not only to schedule ballet productions in the Canton de Vaud’s main urban centre, but also to create an event, which would more widely promote dance. The first Prix in 1973 was a highly
successful sell-out, however since then there have been many innovations to expand the competition. Over the years, the Prix has grown in scale and significance in all areas. The number of applicants increases every year and there are now almost thirty schools offering grants. Furthermore, since 2002, the final of the competition has been broadcast live on the Internet, so it can be viewed from all areas of the globe. An increasing number of dancers feel the pressure to compete in the competition in the hope of gaining the same success as winners such as Darcey Bussell, who won the Prix in 1986. Darcey went on to become the principal dancer at the Royal Ballet School and more recently in 2012, became a judge on the BBC show Strictly Come Dancing. In light of this pressure on young dancers to compete at the highest level, we can only wonder how one can even attempt to evaluate such top class candidates? What quality is it that separates the good from the great? To be considered as a finalist for the ‘Prix de Lausanne’, a candidate’s performance must be nearing perfection and so the winners must possess truly outstanding qualities to become the victor. To the untrained eye, the performances are impeccable but the judges must somehow divulge a winner from the group; to some extent, does personal preference play a part? The main criteria for assessment in any elite ballet competition are technique, musicality
photo by PrixdeLausanne (flickr)
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bstract art is littered throughout Newcastle. There is no shortage of art galleries which focus on promoting contemporary art, most notably the Baltic Art Centre, which has pieces ‘ranging from excellent to just plain weird’ and The Biscuit Factory, an independently-run commercial gallery which is dedicated entirely to modern art, craft and design. The Biscuit Factory, located just east of the city centre, is currently hosting an extensive abstract art exhibition which is running until early March. The display includes paintings, 3D sculptures, photography and prints and is the culmination of their year-long tenth anniversary celebrations. If the ‘evocative and insightful’ works of Malcolm Teasdale and the engorged horses and bloated women of Sarah-Jane Szkiora’s art appeal to you, a trip to this innovative gallery is well worth a visit.
and performance but each judge may place different emphasis on each criterion. Some judges may be solely concerned with technique whereas others may favour musicality; judges may dislike certain choreography or costumes. In a competition like the ‘Prix de Lausanne’, when the technique, musicality and performance of all candidates are consistently of the highest level, how can dance be judged? And most importantly, what does it take to possess the finesse of a winner? Have an opinion on this topic? Share it with us at www.thecourieronline.co.uk/arts
The Courier
arts.27
Monday 11 February 2013
thecourieronline.co.uk/arts c2.arts@ncl.ac.uk | @courier_arts
Spotlight on...
The Rocky Horror Show
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Sunderland Empire 18-23 February
ross-dressing, bisexuality and fishnet tights - Richard O’Brien’s The Rocky Horror Show always carries the expectations of a wild theatre experience; the Sunderland Empire will have to go all out to make this a success. But with a little pinch of charisma, bright lights and fabulous costumes, there are reasons to believe that this show could be simply divine. But we must all ask ourselves the main question: will the actor playing Dr. Frank-n-Furter match the charisma, lust and mojo of Tim Curry? They certainly have big boots to fill. To celebrate the 40th year running of The Rocky Horror Show the anniversary production has toured all the way from Brighton up to Sunderland. The cast boasts a selection of formidable talent, with the actors from We Will Rock You, Jesus Christ Superstar and Priscilla Queen of the Desert. Oliver Thorton will play Dr. Frank-n-Furt and from his seductive and debonair press release photo he looks to be the ideal man for the job. Thorton has a string of enviable theatre credits and has starred in this role for over a year; hopefully just enough time for him to able to master the growling Tim Curry-esque tone of voice. For those who don’t already know ‘Time Warp’ wordfor-word, The Rocky Horror Show is an internationally renowned cult rock and roll musical. The story begins with an ordinary couple, Janet Weiss and Brad Majors, who get engaged and decide to visit their old science teacher to break the good news. However a storm brews, their car breaks down and they are forced to take refuge in a castle; little do they know that they have entered a pleasure palace of fornication. What follows is a whirlwind of violence, sex and drugs – an experience which evidentially changes the dynamic of their once white-sheet relationship.
own bs d t n g cou hearthro i b e Th tional of fic
#5: Dave The Laugh
Book: ‘The Confessions of Georgia Nicolson’ series by Louise Rennison Defined by Urban Dictionary as the ‘absolute cutest fictitious boy in the world by far’, Dave the Laugh hardly needs an introduction. However, for those of you who didn’t spend your pre-teens immersed in the horrifically cringey world of Georgia Nicolson, Dave the Laugh is one of the central characters of Louise Rennison’s teenage novels. He’s one of Georgia’s closest and most loyal friends and also unconsciously acts as her red herring in her plan to make her ultimate crush, Robbie, jealous. That said he’s somewhat of an underdog in the series, someone Georgia accidently snogs from time to time and turns to for love advice when her ridiculous plans fail to woo the latest ‘hottie’ (no surprises there). But in true British fashion, it’s the underdog who I’m rooting for. He may not be as dreamy as the Sex God (aka Robbie), but he’s undoubtedly the true knight in shining armour of the novels. Not only is he
well versed in courtly love, taking Georgia on a romantic walk in the swing park (any girl’s dream date), but he also shows great valiance and strength when he beats up Mark Big Gob for treating Georgia badly - and Mark Big Gob isn’t one you’d take on lightly. What’s more he’s a great kisser (lip nibbling is his particular forte) and knows how to make a girl laugh; he gets in trouble for putting a ‘For Sale’ sign on his school. Classic. However, he is somewhat lacking in depth; if you’re looking for a guy with whom to discuss foreign film, steer clear. Though to be fair to him, he’s only young and still has time to encounter the works of Almodovar. Sadly, though, his age is ultimately the major drawback and reason why he’s only number 5 (let’s be honest he’s not even a ‘man’ yet). But as they say, your first love is always the sweetest. Millie Walton
The Mousetrap
Eros and Psyche
Creditors
he longest running play in history is coming to the Theatre Royal this February. After 60 years on stage and over 25,000 performances, Agatha Christie’s murder mystery, The Mousetrap, is set to grip audiences in Newcastle with its captivating storyline of drama and suspense. Since its debut performance in 1952 the play established itself as a firm favourite on London’s West End, and after its 10,000th show in 1976, the longest running play in the world. But it doesn’t show signs of losing popularity and Newcastle’s Theatre Royal has had to schedule additional performances due to the extremely high demand for tickets. The plot follows the inhabitants and guests at Monkswell Manor and their growing alarm as the murderer at large is reported only a short distance from the hotel. Panic escalates when they realise the criminal is in their midst and all the characters fall under scrutiny to work out the mystery of ‘whodunit’. The play is famous for its twist ending and the identity of the murderer is kept top secret, with cast members asking the audience not to reveal it to anyone at the end of the performance, so as to retain the excitement and suspense for the next viewers. With its all-star cast, including actors from the likes of Eastenders and Coronation Street, and the dramatic twist at its conclusion, The Mousetrap is sure to have audience members on the edge of their seats.
hat is the path of love…? Combining mythical romance, jealousy, cruelty, and lust, the raunchy production of Eros and Psyche explores the universal themes of love, beauty and life. The renowned performance storyteller, Sally Pomme Clayton puts her own unique stamp onto the Greek tale and will be presenting it at our very own Northern Stage. The unbeatable combination of fairytale, myth and erotica is not to be missed. Performed last year at the Swedonborg Society in London, this ‘adult’ production showcases Pomme Clayton’s talent of single-handedly enthralling her audience. She combines Eros and Psyche with Plato’s Symposium, explaining: ‘I have stripped back the myth to reveal hidden Platonic ideas, and use Plato’s raunchy and poetic Symposium as a counterpoint to Psyche’s quest’. The play draws on a favourite scenario in Greek mythology: the dramatic repercussions that occur when a god falls in love with a mortal. You are to expect an array of music and audience participation- so don’t be afraid to join in answering questions (as there really is nothing more awkward than when no one replies.) The production of Eros and Psyche at the Northern stage offers the opportunity to see a truly individual rework of a classic tale through the energizing and captivating storytelling of Sally Pomme Clayton. And of course, the free admission is undoubtedly tempting to any student. Izzy Granger
Tickets are £15 for students for the 5pm performance on 22 February; for more information on tickets and performance times visit www.ATGtickets.com/Sunderland James Ricketts
previews
The Suggestibles
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The Stand 11 February
ou supply the suggestions. They supply the laughs! This is the tagline of The Suggestibles and it certainly makes for a very entertaining improv-comedy show. Having been a highlight of the Northeast comedy scene for 8 years now, The Suggestibles remains fun and fresh, by using the audience as inspiration, no two shows are ever the same. Don’t be scared of being picked on though - the audience is simply invited to shout out ideas or write down random lines that the comedians slot into their dialogue and use to create hilarious stories, sketches and songs, and the best suggestions can win two free tickets to the next show so it’s well worth the effort. The show has won the Royal Television Society Award for Best Entertainment and is big hit on both YouTube and Facebook. Their regular monthly stints in Newcastle and Ouseburn, along with repeat shows at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, are testament to their hilarity and consistency in delivering, despite the improvising nature of their act. Musicians and special guests often join the team of five so you are never quite sure what to expect however, it is guaranteed to always make you laugh. This is a definite must-see while studying in Newcastle, mainly for the comedy but also to sample the delicious food at the Stand Comedy Club. Beatrice Walker
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Theatre Royal 15 February
Katie Sunley
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Northern Stage 20 February
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People’s Theatre 12 - 16 February 2013
avid Greig’s translation of August Strindberg’s brilliant psychological drama, Creditors comes to the North East this February. Strindberg revolutionized playwriting by venturing outside of the polite, middle-class drawing room of the 19th Century and into the dangerous realm of psychological warfare. Creditors leads the audience through a tale of sex, lies and revenge. Greig’s witty translation unearths the humour hidden amongst the tension and deceit. Set in 1890, the play documents an afternoon in a hotel in the benign setting of the Stockholm archipelago. The events that unfold, however, are far from benign as we are introduced to a young artist, his older wife and an elusive stranger. The wife’s initial absence, allows a friendship to develop between the older stranger and the insecure young artist. Exploiting his vulnerability, the stranger proves an insidious influence, orchestrating a dramatic argument between husband and wife on her return. Though strong-willed, the wife finds herself equally caught up in the stranger’s deceitful web. Director Kate Wilkins is confident that the power of Greig’s new translation will make for an exhilarating evening of theatre and showing over the week that includes Valentine’s Day, will act as a relieving antidote for all the bitter singletons and haters of the commercial holiday. Millie Walton
28.musicreviews
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Music Editors: Sam Summers and Chris Haywood Online Music Editor: Sophie Coletta
How to Buy... Valentine’s Day Compilations
The right song can make or break any Valentines date. To prevent disaster, Charlie Dearnley offers a brief guide on how to buy albums for Valentines Day. For Beginners:
Various Artists The Very Best of R&B Love Songs (2006) If you’re ‘Crazy In Love’, but in a ‘Dilemma’ over which album to buy to best ensure a little bit of ‘Bump N’ Grind’, then you need look no further; R&B Love Songs is bursting with unashamed sensuality. It is ram packed with the kind of songs you’d expect to come on in the slow dance section of a school disco. This was always the only moment that people would actually venture out from the safety of their gender specific sectors, and dance with a member of the opposite sex. Evidently continuously successful, and ending with Marvin Gaye’s seminal classic ‘Let’s Get It On’, it is sure to provide the perfect atmosphere.
Holy Fire
Foals
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he hotly-anticipated new album from Oxford boys Foals is most definitely a ‘smart’ move. Having been through a phase of obvious soul searching with not many hits for a while and having produced some mediocre ‘indie’ music, they’re back with an outstanding new, catchy, driving force. The album’s prelude starts slow and soft, with almost Bhangra-esque qualities. Then, in comes a guitar riff almost a la Jimi Hendrix, with driving drums and a grungy bassline. This is a nice surprise; considering some of the ‘music’ they’ve made over the past couple of years, it seems as though they’ve seen the light. ‘Inhaler’ follows the heavy prelude that I cannot really find the words to describe. It’s like original rock and roll Foals. It starts with a jangly guitar that is ridiculously catchy, and as lead singer Yannis Philippakis proclaims that he “can’t get no sleep”, it drops into a nearly metal like guitar riff. It’s one of those songs that is bound to be a hit on the festival stage, as is ‘My Number’. It’s one of those songs that is destined for the right kind of success. It’s not a ‘Gangnam Style’ or any autotuned crap that is in the chart at the minute, it’s just a genuinely cheery good piece of music. It makes quite a sad set of lyrics seem quite joyous, it has a bouncy drumbeat and with a punchy guitar riff that just makes you want to move. For instance, proclaiming that ‘you don’t have my number, and we don’t need each other’ isn’t actually that happy, but imagine listening to it in on a treadmill. That’s the type of song we have on our hands, a bit like old favourite ‘Cassius’. Other songs such as ‘Milk & Black Spiders’ carry haunting repeating guitar riffs
whilst Philippakis sings about someone being “the only one I need” whilst still being memorable. The consistency of the album is something to be proud of. It’s rare that an album is this good throughout, but Foals more than accomplish this with aplomb. All the way down to ‘Moon’, a quiet song that almost makes you wish you were on that floating rock, on your own and thinking about life with no concerns. Every single song is unbelievably well thought-out with excellent musicianship.
It’s rare that an album is this good throughout, but Foals accomplish with aplomb It seems that Foals are a band with a dedicated following, so it almost seems appropriate that the album should be Holy Fire. Like Saul, I have been converted to Foals. People have a certain perception of albums like this, that it’s aimed at a certain audience, but it’s not. This is an album everyone can enjoy and bounce along to on a sunny summers day. Bound for great things, expect to be hearing about this album for a very long time. Holy smoke, Holy Fire is an absolute cracker. Recommended download: ‘My Number’ Josh Nicholson
Tegan and Sara
The Rapture In The Grace Of Your Love
Grace was part rave, part festival sing-a-long, crafted so well that by the end of the record The Rapture became a fully-fledged art-rock band driven by boogie and dippy lyrics.
Temper Temper
News From Nowhere
Heartthrob
If you like this, try ...
Bullet For My Valentine
Darkstar
For Experts:
Barry White Love Songs (2006) Barry White is the king of love. On the odd occasion that I wake up with such a cracking hangover that my voice has descended two octaves below normality, I spend the majority of the morning living the dream and impersonating Barry White. The man can make women crumble just by uttering a growling ‘oooo followed by a husky ‘feels so good’. The climax of this album is definitively ‘I’m Gonna Love You Just A Little More Baby’. The song oozes smooth sexuality and has been the backing for more than a few erotic movie scenes in the past. Barry White promotes, enhances, and advocates love, and wherever his music is playing there is sure to be love in the air.
For The Bin:
Various Artists 40 Timeless Love Songs (2004) This album had the potential to be mediocre, but there are just too many disastrous song choices, which have sent it spiraling into tragic depths from which it should not return. The album is full of materialistic, fake ‘artists’ (and I use that word lightly) trying to sound emotional and endearing. How is Britney Spears singing about how she’s not yet a woman relevant to anyone’s love life? They’re her issues, not ours. And Gareth Gates? Timeless? Really? The man was runner up in a superficial popularity contest and was almost immediately forgotten about. This album makes me feel no love, only anger.
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arkstar are an acclaimed London-based electronic trio, with their latest album News From Nowhere due to be released this week. The group have said that their sophomore release is “much more rhythmic and fluid” than their debut album, which was released three years previously. Fluid is a very apt description for this album as it is very difficult to differentiate from one track to the next. While each track starts with potential, it inevitably drags into the same dreary whine that seems to be the template for the tracks on this album. This is probably the fault of the length of the songs, with the most promising songs, including ‘You Don’t Need A Weatherman’, breaking the five minute mark. The opening track ‘Light Body Clock Starter’ is an interesting choice as it seems to be the most haphazard and monotonous track on the album. It is vaguely reminiscent of those primary school music lessons which consisted of finding as many bizarre instruments as you could and playing a random tune, inevitably resulting in a cacophony of noise rather than anything that could be passed off as actual music. It seems as though the band is keener on throwing as many ‘ambient textures’ into their songs as they can instead of actually writing any quality music. While a music industry saturated in production-line artists needs a few more unique bands willing to try something a bit different, there are a lot of groups out there that do it much better than Darkstar and hopefully, this group will find their feet musically by their next release. Third time lucky? Here’s hoping!
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ullet used to be brilliant. Anyone who’s ever heard The Poison or Scream Aim Fire can attest to the fact that these Welsh boys can write some massive tunes. Mean riffs with harsh screaming vocals contrasted with huge singalong choruses, all wrapped up in a blisteringly fast metalcore package. Sadly that band is nigh indistinguishable from the Bullet of 2013. Save for doing their first sequel track, ‘Tears Don’t Fall (Part 2)’, you’d be hard pressed to find any similarities outside of vocalist Matt Tuck’s unmistakable tone. The problem here is the lyrics. Whilst serviceable melodies abound, and catchy though they are, I don’t think I’ve openly laughed out loud so much at a band who think what they’re writing is ‘intense’ and ‘aggressive’. The whole package feels like a child’s first metal album, with designed-by-committee lyrical topics. Such complex subject matter as the carnage of a mass riot in – wait for it – ‘Riot’ is nothing compared to the notion of someone getting riled up about something in the title track. They’ve even nicked the chorus of All American Rejects’ ‘Dirty Little Secret’ for their song of the same name. From ‘Hearts Burst Into Fire’ clone ‘Dead to the World’ to ‘Begging For Mercy’ replica ‘Breaking Point’, Bullet are absolutely devoid of ideas and have instead taken to using the sugary-sweet feel of last album Fever to regurgitate old ideas with the subtlety of a train wreck. Whilst the album opens with a powerful extended scream from Tuck, perhaps signifying a return to the tenacity of yesteryear, this has about as much passion as a Goth on Valentine’s Day.
Recommended download: ‘Closer’
Recommended download: ‘You Don’t Need A Weatherman’
Recommended download: ‘Breaking Point’
ith seven albums under their belts, the all-singing and all-performing Canadian songwriting twins Tegan and Sara have decided to dive head-first, into the pop mainstream with their latest album Heartthrob. Liberated from the indie-mainstay baggage that they’ve been holding onto for so long, the Quins have delivered a release which makes it clear that they have so much more than trusty acoustic guitars up their sleeves. The first track ‘Closer’ begins the album with a blend of luxurious keyboard and boneshaking drum. The ‘80s and ‘90s pop influences on the opening few tracks are there for all to see. Similarly, the song ‘Goodbye Goodbye’ holds an underscore of brilliant percussion and acoustics we’ve come to expect, with a gorgeous shade of pop to give it that shine. At 33, the twins have moved past their hormonesoaked teenage influences and channeled this new emotional relatability into their music in a way that seems street-smart rather than an accidental happening. The call-and-response vocals on the bridge of ‘I Was A Fool’ seem so perfectly rehearsed that it’s hard not to fall into such a seamless sync of voices. It’s difficult to imagine Tegan and Sara as your cut and dry ‘pop stars’ after spending so long entrenched in the simplicity of the indie singersongwriter box that so many people have placed them in, but that’s exactly what they are. The twins had a respectable and deserved reputation in rock music way before this album was released, but the introduction of such a sophisticated and slick production just seems to add a vivaciousness to their music that is unparalleled.
Beth Durant
Sarah McIntyre
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Scott Tailford
The Courier
localmusic.29
Monday 11 February 2013
thecourieronline.co.uk/music c2.music@ncl.ac.uk | @courier_music
sceNE: B>E>A>K
Delving into the region’s exploding music scene, Kate Bennett brings you a sample of what the North East can offer ...
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eaturing members of local heroes Field Music, The Lake Poets and a host of other bands, B>E>A>K are a sort of ‘bird-rock’ supergroup hailing from the perennially fertile musical soil of Sunderland – ‘masked mackem musical marauders’ in the band’s own words. I’ve never heard of bird-rock either, but if we go on B>E>A>K’s example it involves each band member wearing an extravagant bird mask at all times, nearly all songs having bird-themed titles (such as ‘Pecky Bird’ and ‘Diving for Mackerel’), and throwing coloured feathers over audiences like confetti during live performances, while video clips of seagulls and pigeons are projected onto a sheet over the stage. B>E>A>K are here at the Cluny 2 for the launch of their single ‘Night Owl’, from their forthcoming EP The Blue Edition – the fourth in a series of EPs called The Life of Birds, following on from 2011’s The Red Edition and The Yellow Edition, and last year’s The White Edition. Support comes from another local hero, Ross ‘Futurehead’ Millard and his punk side-project Rivals (described somewhat uncharitably by the lad standing next to me as ‘Fat Flag’), as well as the uplifting experimental pop of London band Thumpers and local ambient-rockers Grandfather Birds. The first thing you notice about B>E>A>K as they come onstage is that there are effing loads of ‘em. They’ve got two drummers. They’ve got a guy with a trumpet, and another with a saxophone. They’ve got a sort of Bez figure in a Joy Division hoodie, whose main role seems to be hitting a very small cymbal repeatedly with the enthusiasm of a small child on a sugar high. The second thing you notice is the colour-coordinated outfits that each band member wears, matching the aforemen-
tioned bird masks. The band’s distinctive, colourful image gives them the appearance of a gang: one that you instantly want to be a part of. The music itself is as exuberant and colourful as the people making it: the crowd, appreciative but largely stationary throughout the three support acts, are all suddenly dancing from the very first drumbeat of set-opener ‘Kehaar’. Crunchy bass and simple but danceable drums serve as a launchpad for a profusion of angular, repetitive guitar riffs, hypnotic synths, and jubilant trumpet and saxophone hooks. It’s a relentlessly joyous assault on the ears that defies easy categorisation.
There’s a firm sense of not taking anything too seriously, as the bird masks attest... Vocals are few and far between, used more as an extra instrument that anything else: this is not the band for you if you’re after moody introspectives baring their soul to the listener through tortured lyrics. There’s a firm sense of not taking anything too seriously, as the bird masks, and the featherconfetti, and the band’s hyperactive stage moves will attest - as well as the fact that they have a track called ‘Stairway to Hendon’ (which, for the record, bears no resemblance whatsoever to the similarlynamed Led Zeppelin song). The guy with the trumpet dives in and out of the audience, forcing unsuspecting crowd members to participate by shoving drums into their arms, suddenly appearing on the balcony above and leaning over it as though he has a death wish, playing his trumpet all the while.
Midway through the set the sheet over the stage falls down, but the projector keeps on flickering; towards the end there’s an explosion of multicoloured glitter and streamers, like a colossal partypopper. And then B>E>A>K’s set comes to a close, and they melt away nonchalantly into the audience they emerged from, leaving only a scattering of feathers and a grinning audience behind them. Part of B>E>A>K’s appeal is the way that they
seem to completely ignore any current music trends, sidestepping whatever the music press are deeming ‘cool’ this month and pulling it off with aplomb. They clearly play exactly what they feel like playing, blending straight-up guitar rock with unconventional, unexpected brass and synth flourishes, and they have a hell of a lot of fun while doing it.
The Academic Playlist
We took it on ourself to discover the music tastes of some of your favourite lecturers. This week, the School of English.
Tina Gharavi
Dr. Lucy Pearson
Dr. Geoffrey Poole
Dr. Joel Wallenberg
Lecturer in Film / Digital Media
Lecturer in Children’s Literature
Senior Lecturer in Linguistics
Lecturer in History of Eng Lang
What music did you grow up to? Can you remember the first record you ever bought? My parents were big fans of Jethro Tull; I didn’t like it then but I’m lukewarm on it now. The first single I ever bought was Ian Dury and The Blockheads’ ‘Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick!’
What music did you grow up to? Can you remember the first record you ever bought? When I was a teenager I listened to Nirvana and The Levellers, but Belle and Sebastian were the first band I was really into. The first record I ever bought was by Ani di Franco, a punky American folksinger who wrote a lot of angry feminist songs.
What music did you grow up to? Can you remember the first record you ever bought? I remember I got a couple of early Billy Joel singles, but from there I somehow drifted into prog. There was a D.C. area band called Happy The Man that was the entree into that kind of stuff. Being like eleven, twelve, I don’t know what I made of it.
What music did you grow up to? Can you remember the first record you ever bought? My parents listened to a lot of Pete Seeger and Arnold Guthrie as well as a bunch of things from the ‘60s, like Air Supply and Jefferson Airplane. The first thing I remember buying was a cassette of highland bagpipe music, when I was about nine or ten, which I’m still interested in.
What soundtracked your time at college and university? I got into ambient and electronica stuff like Camera Obscura, Four Tet and Stereolab. My boyfriend at the time was a massive prog rock fan, so I ended up listening to a lot of Captain Beefheart and Frank Zappa too.
What soundtracked your time at college and university? When I got to college I was still listening to stuff that none of my friends were remotely interested in. But then I really got back into The Beatles and a friend of mine started pushing The Beach Boys on me.
What soundtracked your time at college and university? At that time, mostly Baroque music and bluegrass. I also got into Warren Zevon. I think he’s one of the most brilliant songwriters there’s ever been, he has amazing lyrics.
What music are you listening to at the moment? I’m still listening to Ani di Franco; I’ve grown up alongside her. Most recently I’ve got into Alt-J and Sufijan Stevens.
What music are you listening to at the moment? The last thing I bought was the excessive and wonderfully ginormous 15 disc Larks’ Tongues In Aspic boxset reissue by King Crimson.
What soundtracked your time at college and university? I listened to too much of The Smiths and Pixies for it to be healthy. What music are you listening to at the moment? Some very cheesy ‘80s music: Adam Ant, Psychedelic Furs, General Public (listen to ‘A Little Tenderness,’ and tell me it isn’t a classic). I’ve also been stuck on Editors for a while too as well as some old friends like Arcade Fire, Pixies, and Bruce Springsteen. as well as some ‘70s disco and funk but that is research for a new movie!
What music are you listening to at the moment? I have a couple of songs by Lady Gaga, and some students thought it was really strange. I tried to explain that I just think she’s brilliant because she does things that I don’t expect, with lyrics that catch me off guard.
The Courier
musicfeatures.31
Monday 11 February 2013
How to lose a girl in three tapes
Charles Bukowski, intimacy issues and two and a half minutes of white noise: Lydia Carroll trawls through her troubled past to remind us all how not to compile a Valentine’s mixtape ...
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hen it comes to Valentine’s Day mixtapes, I’ve had a pretty bad run. You’d be forgiven for thinking the biggest faux pas that can be made with a playlist is to include pure slush – I’m talking Whitney Houston – but the real mistake is to completely misjudge your beau’s taste. Lovers, take heed: giving a really thoughtlessly compiled or wildly inappropriate playlist will generally send your intended running in the opposite direction. A mixtape is a sweet idea, and it seems more sincere than other hackneyed gifts, like flowers, or chocolate. But if the execution is terrible, then it really isn’t the thought (or lack thereof) that counts. Reader, I have had not one, but three awful love playlists, over three consecutive Valentine’s. I’ll start from the top...
alcore group As I Lay Dying. For those of you who are less than familiar with their material, here’s a typical lyric: “All that we have is not worth living for/What is this life, that we cling to?” Hmm. Sending this as a Valentine’s playlist was perhaps not the strongest declaration of sanity ever made, but from what I understand, Cutting straightened out, got a normal name, and is now on a surfing ‘gap yah’ in Australia, so all’s well that ends well.
The Metalcore Mix
By the following Valentine’s Day I’d ditched the fringe, and soon my ironic jumper had bagged me my very first Hipster Boyfriend. He was the only person I’ve ever known – possibly the only human still living - to have an actual cassette collection, compromised of six cassettes. Also notable: his Facebook ‘About Me’ description was simply the phrase ‘love, love will fuck us apart again’, because obviously Joy Division’s original choice of verb – ‘tear’ – just wasn’t bitter enough. He spent a lot of time smoking imported Parliaments and reminding people that Bon Iver were a band, and not a person. The playlist itself featured two and a half minutes of white noise, as a sort of interlude. Also included as a somewhat bewildering bonus track was Cee Lo Green’s classic love song ‘Fuck You’ – and yes I’m talking about the uncensored version. I’m sure this would make a wonderful addition to a Valentine’s playlist – well, maybe if the title of said playlist was Fuck You, You Cheating Whore. The Hipster Mix was the only playlist to be presented as a hard copy – on a CD, alas, not a cassette – and as such was the only playlist to feature decorative cover art. Now, hats off for his effort – he’d used up to maybe five different shades of Crayola – but take note, potential Casanovas: hearts tend to look wholly incongruous when pencilled around a Charles Bukowski quote about loneliness. The greatest failing of The Hipster Mix wasn’t a lack of effort, nor were the songs themselves necessarily poor, but the fact remained that it wasn’t a playlist that seemed like it had been created with me in mind; it was a playlist, rather, that he would have loved to get himself. The mixtape came across
It was 2008; I cut my own fringe, and if I wanted to look really cool I would ‘ironically’ (read: in utter seriousness) wear a polar necked jumper with a picture of a chocolate labrador on the chest. I met a boy outside a youth club whose nickname was ‘Cutting’, which in hindsight should have been a clue about what was coming next. He took an amorous interest in me after I offered him a sip of beer out of a ‘secret’ Coke bottle and told him my skull print shoulder bag is by Converse, when actually it’s from Claire’s Accessories. Really, with such bold deception surrounding my hardcore roots I really had no one but myself to blame. We went on a half hour long date the next day to hang around outside a library in the rain, and had a difficult conversation which seemed to centre around me repeatedly making the same bizarre joke about cheese. The following week, on Valentine’s Day, I was sent my first playlist via MSN (MSN, people! 2008!) along with one of those little ‘rose’ emoticons. I’m not even certain that this one can be classed as a mixtape, considering that there was no ‘mix’ – all the tracks were by one artist. Instead, it’s probably better described as a misguided and slightly mentally unstable Valentine’s EP. It was a five track playlist consisting only of songs by American met-
The Hipster Mix
as one big insult – it sent out the message: “here are the ways in which you are culturally lacking, allow me to educate you”.
The Mainstrean Mix
Also known as Now That’s What I Call Desperation 2010.. This playlist is perhaps set apart from the others in its soullessness, and if that sounds excessively harsh, then allow me to explain. I had a short-lived romance with a boy who - due to intimacy issues - made me sleep on the floor, on a blanket, when I stayed at his house. His excuse? “Well I can’t sleep on the floor, I’m too tall for the blanket. And you’re, like, a midget”.”. Reader, do you know? That relationship did not last long. Months later, with Valentine’s Day fast approaching during what I’d imagine was an extended dry spell, he decided to get me back in my rightful place on his bedroom floor with the greatest playlist to ever grace an email attachment. My friends, it was start to finish buttock clenching embarrassment. A hastily assembled list of tracks that could have been plucked at random from any Now compilation released in 2010, I could not think of a single reason he had included any of the songs. No song, with perhaps the exception of Example’s ‘Kickstarts’, was really classifiable as romantic or relevant, and most of them weren’t even good. While metalcore was just not my scene, and The Hipster Mix just went over my head, Mainstream guy was unique because he managed to exclusively pick songs I both knew and absolutely loathed. When I pressed for an explanation I got “you hate ‘Hey, Soul Sister’? Oh, I must have got you confused with someone else”. Wretched. So can there be such a thing as a good romantic playlist? Of course. But creating a great playlist for someone is a delicate labour of love; a great romantic playlist works not because it is finely crafted but because it is personal. Metalcore Guy and I had nothing in common. Hipster Guy wanted me to be someone I wasn’t. Mainstream dude was just… well, kind of a boob, I guess. Good playlists are a bit like good nicknames; they suggest you see an aspect of someone, or share something with them, that no one else does. Really good playlists feel like
a compilation of memories and inside jokes, but in music form. And if all that still sounds like too much of a faff, then remember: Prince. You absolutely cannot go wrong with Prince. In fact, I think if I wind up craving a romantic playlist this year, I’ll just stick Sign O’ The Times on and pretend it was dedicated to me. What? Me? Desperate? Never.
32.tvlistings
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
TV Editor: Chris Taylor Online TV Editor: Ben Parkin
BADvertisement
After a Christmas break ranting at the holiday adverts, Becca Price is back with a bee in her bonnet about everyone’s favourite internet savvy students
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ome advertisement campaigns are designed as a quick fix. They’ll be shown once or twice if you’re giving away a free DVD in the Sunday paper. A step above that, maybe a snappy tune or cheap little thing that your brain physically fails to register - something to provide a mental breather between particularly challenging sections of Hollyoaks. But sometimes, we get the long-term campaigns. Endless ‘episodes’ featuring the same familiar characters, attempting to burrow their way into popular culture until they become part of the nation’s collective mindset. The sort of thing that half-remembered celebrities can reminisce about on some 100 Greatest Adverts countdown show, twenty Boxing Days into the future. These companies hope our memories will get fuzzy and we’ll eventually confuse these TV stalwarts with mildly popular sitcoms, ensuring we have cosy feelings for the brand for many years to come.
BT have been trying this for a while. Its portrayal of The Most Boring Family Ever (2005-2012) has now been passed from parent to child, somehow turning conversations about Broadband into a multi-generational saga. You know, like The Godfather. But with home hubs instead of horse heads. Its characters are the sort of dull, efficiency-minded weirdos that could see someone watching child porn in a public library and tell them how they could stream videos much faster at home. After many happy years of updating their phone contract together, The BT Couple were given a nice wedding (something that actual human beings spent precious seconds of their life requesting in an online poll), and then given the chop, so that one of their barely noticeable children could be packed off for a new spin off with two student flatmates. One of them, Fringe Boy, prefers memorising broadband speeds to human company. The Girl is the only person born in the past thirty years who likes Duran Duran. The heir to the BT bloodline has barely said a word.
So far, this crazy bunch have lived a fairly uneventful existence, much like their predecessors. They make friends, go to parties and occasionally hint at sexual tension all through the delicate medium of phoneline terms and conditions. Hopefully, this is just the beginning. Perhaps a love triangle will emerge, causing BT Kid to club Fringe Boy in the skull with the home hub, or a kidnapping where the culprit is found using a new Caller ID feature. Come on BT, go crazy for once.
House of Cards Netflix
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t’s probably best to begin this by saying that, as much as I think making the entire 13 episode run available immediately is a good idea in a world where we want things as soon as possible, I hope it doesn’t become the norm for the sake of my free time, spending most of it marathoning the episodes to get a proper review together. The pros and cons of this method of distribution is something best tackled another time because, regardless of how it is given to us, House of Cards is still very much within the television serial regulations to the point where each episode is around 50 minutes instead of whatever the producers decided it would be and so it should really be looked at as such. A remake of the fantastic Ian Richardson helmed House of Cards, which hit the sweet spot by being almost too accurate in its portrayal of the leadership struggle after Margaret Thatcher stepped down which occurred at the same time the first
episode aired. This House of Cards features many similarities with the original but, with the help of Beau Willimon (writer of The Ides of March) and the brilliant as always Kevin Spacey in the FU role, this time Underwood not Urquhart, it becomes its own beast. Frank Underwood, despite all his hard work helping the President get into office, is rejected the position of Secretary of State despite a promise to be given it during the campaign. Alongside his wife Claire (Robin Wright), Frank slips further and further into murky territory to work his way up the political ladder devouring the campaign, as he so eloquently puts it, “one bite at a time”. One of those bites is Peter Russo, a congressman with a history of substance abuse and a love of prostitutes. Using this knowledge to his advantages, Frank uses Peter as one of his many pawns. Russo starts off as a bit of a wishy washy character but, as the series progresses, Corey Stoll’s performance is heartbreaking. Zoe Barnes (Kate Mara) is also another pawn, a journalist at The Herald who Frank uses to leak stories to, helping her work her way to infamy in an almost Faustian agreement. House of Cards is not a show of likeable characters. The closest you even come to anyone likeable
Being Human
is Russo. Everyone is ready and willing to backstab whoever they can to get to the top, regardless of their profession. It’s something that we’ve all seen before but watching Spacey’s Underwood navigate his web of lies with Machiavellian malice is extremely entertaining to watch. Spacey himself is by far the best part of the series who, despite having some mediocre dialogue (there’s no real Sorkin quips here and the fourth wall breaking monologues aren’t quite as Shakespearean as Richardson’s), really puts on an excellent performance, making you almost root for him despite some of the dark (and I mean dark) depths he goes to to succeed. So too, as mentioned before, does Corey Stoll, giving some heart to the pawns who, in the original, were quickly discarded. David Fincher, who directs the first two episodes, puts his mark on the series which is present throughout (he really needs to do more TV work) and, although it lags a bit in the middle to look into Frank’s past and the ending is a little unsatisfactory (although we have 13 more episodes coming soon). House of Cards is an entertaining watch, even just to see Kevin Spacey do what he does best! Chris Taylor
Weekly Wipe
Nashville
BBC3, Sunday 10pm
BBC2, Thursday 10pm
More4, Thursday 10pm
he fifth series of Being Human gives us a fresh start. The original characters, Mitchell, George and Annie have all been killed off and now we have three new characters taking their place as the resident vampire, ghost and werewolf sharing a house in Barry, Wales. First there’s Hal, the five-hundred year old vampire who was feared by all... until he went on an OCD controlled clean streak that lasting for fiftyseven years until the end of the last series. Next is Tom, a werewolf brought up on the outskirts of society who is very naïve and ready to trust anyone nice, despite his intimidating looks. Last is Alex, killed last series to punish Hal who was tricked into drinking her blood. With no other place to go, she has ended up living with Hal and Tom, while forever regretting her fashion choices on her last day alive. This series, always great at its blending of the mundane and the supernatural, begins with Hal restrained to a chair as a form of blood rehab. He is struggling massively, but not with bloodlust, rather from his compulsive need for cleanliness as Tom and Alex allow the housework to get away from them. After the ending of the last series, where a dystopia was avoided by having Annie blow up herself, a hoard of vampires and baby Eve, it will be interesting to see how this series will manage to up the ante, especially with the introduction of an agency that hides the supernatural from sight.
ejoice! After a long period of only having a meagre ration of annual specials, Charlie Brooker’s Wipe series returns to regular programming, with a big shiny budget and a spot on BBC2 as well. Weekly Wipe is the new blend of his previous Screenwipe and Newswipe shows, simultaneously pouring scorn over international politics and the telly, as well as various other irritations. It also sees the return of usual commentators including US stand-up Doug Stanhope and pet idiot ‘comedian’ Barry Shitpeas (now joined by the equally gormless Twitterati ambassador Philomena Cunk). There’s even a discussion piece - if you wanted to know what Richard Osman from Pointless made of Django Unchained, now you can find out. One of the things that makes the Wipe series stand out is the smart analysis behind the comedic commentary. Compared to the standard topical news quiz or sum-of-the-week stand up show, it often manages a deeper, more detailed approach that takes on not just the news events themselves but the media hullabaloo that inevitably surrounds it as well as culture, and treats everything with a sarcastic, unimpressed sneer. You wonder how many hours the research team spends every week, trawling through outlandish American news channels to pick out the highlights. It’s a relief to have the Wipe format revived, and with the second series of Black Mirror coming to Channel 4 in the near future, there’s even more for Brooker fans to look forward to.
Tria Lawrence
Becca Price
ashville has been critically acclaimed throughout the US, but how well does the whole “country music drama” translate for UK viewers? The first episode shows the melodrama we can expect to unfold, with talks of money, music and politics in Tennessee. The series promises a backstage look at this southern city, the epicentre of country music. The show is anchored in a storyline about fictional country music legend Rayna James played by Connie Brtiton and the hot young thing, country-pop sensation Juliette Barnes, played by Hayden Panettiere. There is a star-war waging between the two icons, as James is asked by her label to co-headline for the successful and comparatively mainstream Barnes. As Rayna James manages stardom with family, her husband, Teddy Conrad played by Eric Close will enter a journey into politics with the help of his father in law Lamar Wyatt (Powers Booth). Other characters who come into play include Deacon (Charles Esten), Rayna´s bandleader, and her potentially troublemaking boyfriend, Avery (Jonathan Jackson) This country music soap isn’t ashamed to giving music some time; a bold decision. It is able to make the country music industry more likeable to all audiences, which is quite impressive. At the same time, Connie Britton of Friday Night Lights fame portrays another loveable interesting character that she makes her own as opposed to the annoying voices and boring plots of some of the secondary characters. Carlos Manrique
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The Courier
featurestv.33
Monday 11 February 2013
thecourieronline.co.uk/tv c2.tv@ncl.ac.uk | @courier_tv
Look stream. Smell stream. Be stream.
TV is changing - so much so that we’re almost at the point where we can’t call things such as House of Cards TV shows as they make the move to On Demand. Instead we need to make up a funky word like “episodic narrative” or some such thing. Beth Durant explores whether or not such a change has any staying power
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etflix recently began an attack on the TV channel heavyweights by launching House of Cards, a star-studded remake of the BBC drama which casts Kevin Spacey in his first lead TV role (I know, I can’t believe it’s taken this long either). Making all 13 episodes available worldwide in one swoop, they’ve been able to capitalise on an impatient audience which looks for instant gratification instead of waiting through months of hiatuses for a series to play out. The move has been lauded as the first step towards
the lucrative and sophisticated world of original Internet TV, with a complete 180 on the usual ‘on demand’ nature of catch-up online streaming with facilities such as iPlayer and 4OD. This isn’t to say that Netflix doesn’t face competition from other leading competitors. Although it was meant to be their day in the sun, Amazon Instant Video announced (on the same day) that it had reached a deal with U.S. TV giants PBS to stream the popular costume drama Downton Abbey, to begin with the third season in June and then with a move to release all seasons a month later.
Yet this isn’t really the ‘checkmate’ they were looking for, and the company isn’t reaching the same heights as it wishes it could. Demonstrating the perceived dominance of the company, House of Cards isn’t the only show that’s been given a revamp by Netflix. Arrested Development, which originally aired from 2003-2006, has been licensed for 14 brand new episodes which are to be released in May 2013. The revival of such critically acclaimed and arguably unjustifiably cancelled shows creates a strange and unprecedented tectonic connection between the TV and the Internet, and demonstrates how a series that was pretty much ‘dead and buried’ can move from one to the other so seamlessly. Reed Hastings, the CEO and brainchild of Netflix, has said in a recent interview, “Our view is that over the next couple of years as Internet TV really grows, people will look back and say that this was the turning point’’, and it’s extremely hard to disagree with him. The only downside to online original TV is that it relies on a constant subscription from viewers, and if no-one is subscribed then no-one is going to be watching. It’s hard to reach the same audience as you would if you were airing an original series on national television. The key is to market it like any other show. But is it something that’s really sustainable? The future of online TV depends entirely on viewership and advertisement. The cost to create original TV is still the same, regardless of whether it’s streaming nationwide or internet-wide. If you watch something on 4OD you’ll see that there are regular advert breaks where they would be if it had been airing on television. Companies are slowly realizing that online streaming is the way to reach active audiences. Is this really the beginning of something new?
A K-night in with the girls
As Valentine’s Day rolls around, the singletons will probably be grabbing their tubs of ice cream and sitting down with some TV. With enough period dramas around at the moment, your night in will probably involve large period mansions. Richard Spier looks at why you could throw a dart at the TV guide and hit a period drama
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hose hoping to have a good collective mope on Thursday need not fear. As Valentine’s Day fast approaches we can expect to see couples turn to restaurants and roses, while the singletons collectively gorge on chocolate and weep. But those searching for their knight in shining armour may look no further than the screen this week, for period dramas are in their golden age. Given that love is in the air, where better to start than with Ripper Street; although the content is admittedly grim, there is still Matthew McFadden and if you can’t find a real Mr Darcy, you can at least find the actor that once played him. If you feel
queasy then try Parade’s End, or failing that there is always Upstairs Downstairs or Downton Abbey. Or if you prefer the sound of tills try The Paradise or Mr Selfridge. It would be fair to say that the BBC and ITV couldn’t churn these period dramas out fast enough. So why are we so hooked? Our love lives (or lack thereof) are chiefly to blame when, in search of Eros, we often take solace in the fact that we are not the first to feel so blue. Indeed, love seems to be the main focus of all these dramas. Accordingly, we are expected to believe that department stores were principally founded on their owner’s libido, and that even Jack the Ripper can come between a detective and his wife. Of
course love stories do happen today as well, but the addition of nineteenth century costume makes it so much nicer on the eyes. It is also fair to say that stories are even more scandalous when placed in history. Today, someone divorcing and running off with someone else isn’t such a big deal. At the turn of the 20th century, however, divorce was a shocking social anomaly. By setting our story in another timeframe we can include servants, inheritance, war and a sense of snootiness that gives our story another dimension. Our relationship troubles are no longer signified by a tub of ice cream and a Facebook status, but instead a haughtily written letter and some affair with the maid downstairs. Suddenly we can love the protagonists and hate their pretentious contemporaries. This leads me to the second reason for loving period dramas: it is so much easier to watch. With the risk of being cynical, I would suggest that watching a different timeframe simplifies everything. Gone is the automatic presumption that a priest/ doctor/police officer is a man, or heterosexual and thus modern drama forces us to ask questions of the characters that might detract from the main plot. When all we want to see is some raunchy Victorian relationships, the last thing on our mind is class struggles. One gets the sense that this class obsessed nation is nostalgic of the time when everyone could be confident in their distinct classes. Sure, others may not agree with the beliefs portrayed, but it’s rare that a period drama has social issues as its focus and so many just do away with them altogether. So, watching Elizabeth Bennet find her Mr Darcy is a bit like taking lack-of-love paracetamol: we love her dress, we love her eventual wealth and her derision of social norms. But we also love that we don’t have to worry about whether or not to call her Miss or Ms. To all those singletons – Happy watching.
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TV couple story arcs
Rose and Bernard Nadler (Lost) I’ve been told by a higher entity that I must include this couple or risk editorial grievous bodily harm. As a non-watcher of Lost (sorry, not sorry) I decided to educate myself in this illustrious coupling by watching various YouTube fan videos. From what I can gather after viewing one lengthy The Fraybacked montage is that they actually seem pretty endearing.
Francis and Sophia (Made in Chelsea) The burgeoning ‘will they won’t they’ romance between the diamond heir–cum–semi-professional skateboarder and the possible distant relative of the late war poet Siegfried Sassoon gripped TV audiences nationwide last year. Childhood teddies were swapped, art galleries were visited and the sexual tension was finally consummated in a series finale snog. Unfortunately for them, they were upstaged by the incredible hair-altering slap Spencer received, which will remain forever celebrated in .gif form.
Naomi and Emily (Skins) Not only following the unspoken TV rule of lesbian couples having antithetic hair, these two successfully portrayed a genuine tale of teenage girlon-girl romance that wasn’t orchestrated solely for the male gaze. Whilst it all went a bit tits-up in series 4, they did get a happy ending, after plenty of heart-wrenching drama along the way.
Mulder and Scully (The X-Files) Whilst the writers of X Files initially resisted this coupling, no one could deny the chemistry between two FBI agents for long, what with all the ‘forehead sex’, hand touching and Catatonia songs named after them.
Buffy and Spike (Buffy) Sorry, Angel who? With a little help from Joss Whedon’s character-writing mastery the bleachedblonde resident bad boy was transformed over the course of seven seasons from a cold-hearted, ruthless vampire, into Sunnydale’s tragic romantic hero. Whilst his affections weren’t always reciprocated, the couple did have some of the best housedestroying sex ever seen on TV. Sophie Coletta
34.filmfeatures
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Film Editors: Hayley Hamilton and Sam Hopkins Online Film Editor: Chris Binding
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Valentine’s night in
Forgot to make that table reservation? Cinema packed with couples? Then why not stay in this Valentine’s with Aisha Din’s suggestions for the best movie date night in
Couples in Film
Romeo + Juliet
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The stylish Baz Luhrmann interpretation of Shakespeare’s iconic Romeo and Juliet has all the highs and lows of what it’s like to be in love. This movie, is true to the original play in script but the dazzling parties, the flawless acting and the true heart wrenching love that Romeo and Juliet feel for each other are perfect to cuddle up with.
Wall-E and Eve (Wall-E) One of the best, animated films in recent years, Wall-E is a simple rubbish-collecting robot living in the distant future. He meets Eve and goes along with her to become involved in a mission that will affect mankind forever. They may seem like poles apart, but in this tale of two robots, opposites attract.
Jack and Rose (Titanic)
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(500) Days of Summer
The Notebook
A sort of non rom-com, but so perfect too. Joseph Gordon Levitt and Zooey Deschanel play Tom and Summer and Tom is OBSESSED with Summer. We follow Tom through the 500 days that he is acquainted with Summer and see the ups and downs of a man in love. This movie questions fate, meant to be and ultimately love, but don’t feel disheartened as hope is just round the corner and days keep ticking.
The Ultimate: Allie (Rachel McAdams) fights over the ideas of class, money and lifestyle for her strong love for a common man Noah (Ryan Gosling) in 1940, an elderly woman fights with Alzheimer’s and sits with Duke an elderly man who reads a story to her. The ideas of love, friendship and memory are so strong that you’ll want a love like this to last the ages.
Casablanca
This fated couple meet aboard the ill-fated Titanic on its maiden voyage. Split by class, they cast aside social boundaries to fall in love and stand on the bow of the doomed liner. Follow their frolicking for over 3 hours and the DiCaprio-Winslet chemistry and fantastic soundtrack will win you over by the end.
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Scarlett O’Hara and Rhett Butler (Gone With the Wind) Another old great with another infamous couple; The complex relationship between Clark Gable and Vivien Leigh is spread over nearly 4 hours in this Hollywood epic. The ups and downs of the relationship are laid bare as time goes by during and after the Civil War, they may not be perfect but what a vivacious couple they are.
Jesse and Celine (Before Sunrise and Before Sunset)
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Jesse (Ethan Hawke), an American backpacker, first meets Celine (Julie Delphy) on a train journey and both their lives are changed forever. They spend one magical night exploring Vienna and meet again in Paris a decade later in the sequel Before Sunset. This couple makes these films witty, charming and utterly unforgettable.
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Rick Blaine and Elsa Lund (Casablanca) A classic film featuring a truly classic couple. Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman portray two past lovers as they meet again in a gin joint in the Moroccan city of Casablanca. They reminisce over past times thanks to pianist Sam and plenty of drink. A fantastic script and eminently quotable, this couple light up one of Hollywood’s greats. Jacob Crompton-Schreiber
The ultimate love story of separation, memories, freedom and Nazis is set in exotic Morocco in 1941 during World War 2, the exquisite Ingrid Bergman plays Isla Lund, who becomes reacquainted with her love Rick Blaine played by Humphrey Bogart. The two have unfinished business but neither can deny that something still exists between them, even if Rick won’t admit it. We see love at its best when Isla and her famous husband Victor Laszlo escape to America thanks to the valiant Rick.
Caught in a bad romance Valentine’s Day isn’t always chocolate-box tales of romance. Chris Binding takes a look at the darker side of relationships in film
Stockholm Syndrome If there’s one thing laborious about Valentine’s films it’s the tired, repetitive rules of dating, where a couple divided by their own ideals learn to understand each other as ‘people’. With 90 minutes of gag-inducing didactics, emotional vomit and tired cliché, sometimes it’s just better to jump in at the deep end, kidnap yours truly and see how it goes. From the nurse / patient dynamics of Misery to the playful peril of Vincent Gallo’s Buffalo 66, there’s nothing wrong with a little bit of ‘Stockholm syndrome.’ If King Kong could potentially achieve inter –species erotica then there’s hope for us all yet.
Femme Fatales
The Hollywood ‘Valentine’s Movie’ is a foul creation indeed, where female caricatures of sassy emancipated feminists swoon around saying ‘they don’t need no man’ until (cough) a man arrives on the scene. Although there’s no denying there are talented female leads involved in the rom–com genre such as Jennifer Aniston and Rachael McAdams, but there is a massive abundance of devious female characters, who previously gave a new meaning to the term ‘bad romance’. From the ferocious Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct to the insecure cheese–wire wielding Asami from Audition: these women are a dangerous alluring presence in cinema. It’s a destructive kind of romance that actively affects the communities and characters that surround it.
Where Is The Love?
The types of cinematic romances that people remember are often soaked in melodrama. Audrey Hepburn kissing in the studio-produced rain, manipulative dementia dynamics in The Notebook and Mr Darcy bumbling how much he ardently loves Elizabeth (in the rain). Thankfully films come along to shatter these melodramatic fables in
a variety of ways, positioning themselves as anti – valentines films. While some can be resolutely charming such as 500 Days of Summer, others such as emotionally drained Shame are a little harder to swallow. A personal favourite is dark comedy Dark Horse (2011) where an eccentric loner living in his mother’s basement finally falls for a girl... before contracting Hepatitis B from her and dying shortly thereafter.
WIN!
It’s competition time again! This time win tickets to see For Ellen at the everromantic Tyneside Cinema
Till Death Do Us Part Sometimes the most intriguing romances are found on the borderline between normality and un-filtered criminality. From the strange childish relationship between Jean Reno and Natalie Portman in Leon to the murderous couples of Natural Born Killers and Bonnie and Clyde, death can often bring people closer together. Especially in the case of all the major mob movies (Goodfellas, Scarface), the relationship between the gangsters and their spouses explores ‘love’ in forms of emotional dependency in the face of a lifestyle characterised by violence and murder.
For Ellen is a touching indie-drama which sees Paul Dano’s struggling rock star on a long-distance trip to re-connect with his estranged daughter Ellen. The wonderful Tyneside Cinema have give us two ticket for our lucky winner. In which film does Paul Dano star prominently, but remain silent for the majority of his screen-time? a) There Will Be Blood b) Ruby Sparks c) Little Miss Sunshine Email your answer to editor.union@ncl. ac.uk before 12pm on Thursday 14 to be in with a chance. For Ellen opens at Tyneside Cinema on 15 February
The Courier
reviewsfilm.35
Monday 11 February 2013
thecourieronline.co.uk/film c2.film@ncl.ac.uk | @Courier_Film
Zero Dark Thirty (15) Kathryn Bigelow’s follow up to The Hurt Locker is another politically motivated war drama, focusing on a group of individuals dealing with the psychological and physical demands of modern warfare. While The Hurt Locker focused more upon the unbearable tension and danger of live warzones on a day to day basis, Zero Dark Thirty widens the scope to an international decade long man -hunt for non – other than Osama Bin Laden. Following the journey of CIA recruit Maya (Jessica Chastain) Zero Dark Thirty chronicles the characters transition from new recruit to leading expert in the field of hunting Osama Bin Laden. As a stylishly shot, politically relevant war film as much about bureaucratic intelligence than physical warfare, Zero Dark Thirty is a gruellingly believable film of 21st century warfare and its victims. As expected for a film of such serious intent, the casting is superb with The Sopranos’ James Gandolfini and Mark Strong amongst others. However the main accolades lie with the performance of lead Jessica Chastain, with an incredible physical performance that characterises the intense stress, sleep deprivation and frustration at
the obstacles that come between her and her goal, including American politics, attempted assassinations and the ethics of torture. The ‘torture’ issue itself is something that is at the controversial heart of Zero Dark Thirty, questioning whether the ends really justify the means. If documentaries such as Taxi to the Dark Side and Standard Operating Procedure created firsthand accounts of torture in your mind, having it played out in extended dramatic sequences is equally disturbing to watch. Blending fact and fiction in recreations of bombings in London and at Camp Chapman also produce a strangely gruesome effect because they have already happened, jarring you out of the fictional character drama to a harrowing sense of post-9/11 déjà vu. The scenes within Pakistan are also incredibly tense, as a dangerous place where death literally waits around the corner for an American. Like Bigelow’s previous films the style is experimental and rife with visual metaphors seething with black humour including a lead torturer having caged monkeys as pets in the centre of an interrogation complex. The final sequence itself of Bin Laden’s death at the hands
of American Special Forces team is also incredible: from the Predator – esque banter of the soldiers in helicopters, to night – vision POV based cinematography, Bigelow re – enforces tension and the silence of combat in real –time, creating a truly thrilling climax in the process. However for a film with the tagline ‘the story of history’s greatest man-hunt for the world’s most dangerous man’ the finale throws the entire legitimacy of this statement in a question; with the tone of the final scene devoid of any real celebration and resembling the ending of The Graduate more than the stereotypical American bias of past war - films. With gruesome images that stick in the mind and
thus characterise 21st Century warfare and a psychological ‘strangeness’ echoed by the style and minimalist music , Zero Dark Thirty will hopefully incite dialogue about the ‘War on Terror’ and the morals and motivations of the decisions made over the last decade.
Flight (15)
Bullhead (15)
Movie 43 (15)
Lincoln (12A)
Airline pilot Captain Whip Whitaker (Denzel Washington) miraculously lands a fatally faulty jet saving the lives of many on board. Exalted by the mass media and labelled a national hero, enquiry into the causes of the crash reveals much darker secrets than first thought. Secrets not of the plane but of Whitaker himself. From the very first frame we are in the groggy aftermath of the self-destructive social life of Whitaker plagued by alcohol and drugs. Yet, as the brutal hangover is to an alcoholic, blade-sharp cinematography is to Robert Zemeckis, and Flight is no exception. Most notably is the plane crash, which simultaneously renders viewers rooted to the very edge of their seat, and in utter awe of the unerring confidence of, ever-intoxicated, Captain Whip. It is here, however, that the high-speed action comes to an end, and the turbulent journey into Whitaker’s demons begins. At its heart Flight is a film about retribution, of both the soul and mind. Set in a world of pain, anger and suspicion, the exquisite performance of Washington makes sure we feel it all the way. Emotions of the ups, the downs, and the waydowns are genuinely captured, in perfect partnership with the great ensemble cast. However, the stand-out performance is perhaps deserved by Goodman; an ingeniously witty contrast to the seriousness of Whitaker’s situation and a true masterstroke.
Bullhead, a Belgian film in Limburgish and French, was Oscar nominated for Best Foreign Language Film in 2012. The title comes from the codename the police give the protagonist, Jacky Vanmarsenille (Matthias Schoenaerts), who they suspect is involved in the illegal trade in hormones and the recent murder of a police officer. Jacky is an incredibly muscular, quiet and somewhat awkward man, with his build mainly due to childhood trauma. This incident is related to the audience in a rather clumsy flashback, but the young Jacky (Robin Valvekens) portrays the awkwardness of puberty and an adolescent understanding of sex excellently. The traumatic incident itself is very shocking and this translates well on the screen. However, from that point on, the plot becomes complicated, with several story lines which are never given the time to breathe. Apart from Jacky, none of the characters have enough screen time to come to life, which is a shame when the little we see of them is so interesting. Jacky’s old friend Diederik (Jeroen Perceval) has such dramatic potential, being a closeted and guilt-ridden gay man, as does the sister of the cause of Jacky’s trauma. The film is further hampered by unnecessarily pretentious camera use, and long shots of the countryside which are beautiful but add little.
Just like the struggle to end slavery; Lincoln was LONG. The movie exposed the personal and professional life of the great Abraham Lincoln in this second term; with his fierce desire to extend the American Constitution to include the 13th Amendment, the Abolition of Slavery. Daniel Day Lewis was exceptional in the role of Lincoln, presenting us with a man of great humility and drive. Not only did he convince us more of Lincoln as an absolute legend, but we really cared for the man and his struggle. However this is where the care ends. It seems the jarred storytelling, the huge amount of characters and the heavy dialogue made it difficult for one to get attached to any specific character. Lincoln was hugely significant to the history of the United States of America, but as his achievements are so many, Spielberg has decided to focus on the Abolition of Slavery. However for anyone going in blind to this subject, this movie is probably not the best learning tool. It assumes the audience is well educated in the topic of Slavery, the Emancipation Proclamation, the major figureheads of the time and Lincoln himself. Daniel Day Lewis, Tommy Lee Jones and Sally Field emerge on the screen and Spielberg assumes we know who they and their characters are. And if you happen to get lost, the music will tell you when to be happy and sad, leaving a long, heavy, generic Spielberg movie.
VERDICT: A near perfect mix of gritty reality, emotion, tension and laughter, Robert Zemeckis’s return to live-action film is a triumph. Washington alone is on top form, but taken with Zemeckis’s production and script, Flight is skyhigh.
VERDICT: Bullhead, in trying to explore too many topics, over-complicates and weakens itself, but nevertheless is an interesting film, with a strong central performance and interesting, if difficult-to-follow, plot.
Movie 43 is quite possibly one of the worst films ever made. Produced by Peter Farrelly and Charles Wessler, this film may appeal to fans of Hall Pass, Shallow Hall and There’s Something About Mary. The audience watched in complete silence for most of the ninety minutes (it felt a lot longer), with only a few outbreaks of very short laughter. Four people left about half way through, and the remainder sat in the vain hope that, having set the bar so low, the film could maybe achieve mediocrity. Even this was asking too much. The film consists of various sketches with famous actors, including Hugh Jackman, Kate Winslet, Halle Berry, Emma Stone (Superbad, Easy A), Gerard Butler, Naomi Watts, Uma Thurman, Liev Schreiber (Defiance and Scream) and Chloe Grace Moretz. Online reviews for this film have been quite poor, but I didn’t expect it to be this bad. Every sketch is at the very least crude, at the very worst: sexist, racist and homophobic while always being dull. The framing device connecting these sketches involves two stoned teenagers searching for the titular ‘Movie 43’; a movie so awful it was banned. If lack of quality was enough ban something, then this film would qualify. This was without a doubt the worst film I’ve seen in a cinema. A more interesting movie would be how the hell Movie 43 was made, and how they press-ganged the cast into being associated with it (the producer has admitted heavy guilt tripping and favours were involved.) VERDICT: If you must see it, then wait for the sketches to be uploaded to youtube and watch there, because the fact that this film has already made a profit shows that someone knows what they’re doing, even if they probably shouldn’t be allowed to do it.
VERDICT: Lincoln is a typical oscar-bait type film with impressive performances (particular by Daniel Day-Lewis) and visuals. However, it is overlong with jarred storytelling and, in the end, this lets it down.
Alex Morgan
Aisha Din
Muneeb Hafiz
This film is now showing at Tyneside Cinema.
Alex Morgan
VERDICT: Subversive, political and highly stylish, Zero Dark Thirty is a film that both acknowledges and questions the ethics of 21st Century warfare. However Bigelow’s real achievement is in creating tension and involvement in a narrative for which we already know the outcome. Chris Binding
36.features
Monday 11 February 2013
Do it like they do on the Discovery Channel Valentine’s Day is looming; meaning a number of different things for people. You could be going out for a romantic meal with your loved one, or you might be having a night on the town to drown your feelings of loneliness. But what are our closely related animal companions doing this Valentine’s Day? Science Editor James Simpson delves deep into the underworld of the Animal Kingdom to reveal what they didn’t tell you in you Biology class
The Pretty Boy We all know the type - the metrosexual male. Trimmed eyebrows, bronzed skin, perfectly combed hair and defined pectoral muscles. Their avian counterpart is the peacock. Strutting around, chest pumped out and attractive colourful clothes on show making itself a prominent mate for females. Interestingly this also provides defence against predators. Speaking of pumpedout chests, instead of sporting a low cut Vneck top, the Frigatebird inflates a red sac on his chest. The bigger the sac, the more attractive he seems to a female.
Photo: Aquaimages (Wikimedia)
The Dancer Everyone thinks they know how to bust a few moves on the dance floor. Whether you opt for the infamous Inbetweeners team effort, or you prefer to solo it out like Jacko himself, we all think we’ve got that special something. But our animal counterparts trump us when it comes to elaborate displays. The bird of paradise dances around the female inflating his feathers much like the peacock. With neon designs it is difficult for the female not to notice. However, if she rejects him, it’s safe to say he leaves feeling somewhat deflated.
The Excreter You only have to read ‘Unay confessions’ on Facebook to discover how many drunken students end up urinating on one another during the act (intentionally or unintentionally).Turns out that’s pretty normal if you’re a giraffe! The male giraffe will - there’s no way around this probe the female’s genitalia, causing her to urinate in his mouth. In a nutshell, if the taste of the urine does it for him, they find themselves a nice patch of grass and crack on. It’s not just giraffes though. If a porcupine is looking for a mate, and does in fact find one, instead of mooching over there and using his charm, he decides to do the complete opposite, and urinates all over his chosen mate. There’s also a strange phenomenon in White Front Parrots which involves some intense French kissing. When the male becomes sexually aroused, he vomits violently into the mouth of the female. This lets her know he’s turned on. It’s like a classic Fresher horror story, but at least the parrots have an excuse!
The Independent Woman With the discovery of IVF, women can now have babies without men. Believe it or not, as intelligent as we think we may be, there is a female mite which has been doing this for thousands of years. Histiostoma murchiei grows her male counterpart from cells of her own body which she depletes and cultures herself a male who then goes on to mate with her. Everyone has heard of the notorious man-eater, The Black Widow spider. This nasty female lures the male into having sex with her and then after the deed is done, rips his head off and eats it. This ensures she has enough food sources to support her newly fertilised womb. This is similarly seen in the Day Octopus where the female eats the male after sex. The Anglerfish bites on to a female when he wants to mate. He then begins to die from the inside out and effectively turns into a bag of sperm that hangs off the female as she’s swimming around. This way, whenever she needs to reproduce, she has a constant supply of sperm.
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CENSOR
Photo: Hans Hilliewaert (Wikimedia)
The Performer Serenading your loved one is supposed to be romantic. You may think your dreadful rendition of James Blunt’s ‘You’re Beautiful’ is enough to get you somewhere but koala bears have it even worse. They sing these horrible out of tune songs, which apparently turn the females on. No wonder they’re an endangered species. Frogs definitely have an edge on us. They use their specially adapted buccal cavity (throat) to produce weird and wonderful mating calls which attract females.
Photo: Camazine (Wikimedia)
Photo: Summi (Wikimedia)
The Romantic When trying to spark the start of something special, gifts can often be the way to your chosen one’s heart. The Adelie Penguin is one that adopts this strategy. The male gives the female a smooth pebble which is found on the beach they occupy. They are not very easy to find so this is a big romantic gesture. If the female accepts, they go round the corner and do the dirty. However, the Adelie penguins go on to marry their partners and remain with them for life! Awww. Photo: Samuel Blanc (Wikimedia)
Photo: Wikimedia
The Courier
The Courier
features.37
Monday 11 February 2013
The Pervert
Nemo: The harrowing reality
We all love pandas, with their fluffy innocent little faces, and the fact they’re an endangered species. This is one of the reasons that researchers in China showed the pandas pornography to see if it would increase their reproduction rates. Turns out it did - the horny little buggers doubled their reproduction rate. After a bit of searching, it turned out that the experiment confined the male pandas to their own rooms and were shown videos (with sound) of other pandas doing the deed. Were the videos specifically made, or did one of the researchers just have them suspiciously ‘lying around’?
Clownfish have some serious messed up sexual encounters. So let’s discover the truth about Finding Nemo. When the prominent female dies (Nemo’s mother), the male (Nemo’s dad) switches gender, and proceeds to become the prominent female. The most prominent male, which in Finding Nemo would be Nemo, then has sex with the prominent female. Basically what I’m trying to say is that Nemo has sex with his Dad who is now a woman. Messed up right?
ED! R O S N E C Photo: Colegota (Wikimedia)
Photo: Wikimedia
The Dominatrix We’ve all heard about female domination over men. But there’s one species who takes it to a whole new level. Forget the cackling hyenas in The Lion King, the bit they left out was that the female hyena has a seven inch clitoris, which is effectively a penis. When the clitoris becomes erect, the male is beckoned by the female and intercourse begins. She dominates throughout and it’s not uncommon for the males to come away from this injured. After all, the real tough nut is the female as she eventually has to give birth out of that tiny penislike hole. Ouch. Photo: Tinyfroglet (Flickr)
The Machine You may think that having a good hour-long session is something of an achievement but that’s trumped by these next two animals. Squid have sex all day every day for two weeks, which in itself is pretty impressive. That’s enough time to go through the whole Kama Sutra. In contrast to this, lions ejaculate after 20 seconds of intercourse, but have sex up to 40 times a day for about a week. This works out at 280 times a week. Not bad going, eh?
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The Damned Dirty Ape Bonobos are one of our close relatives in the animal kingdom. They’re also one of the dirtiest I’ve heard about. As well as every Bonobo being bisexual, they have sex at every available opportunity. They are 100% polygamous and will go around bonking anything in their group. It has also been reported that they enjoy oral sex and mutual masturbation. It has even been said that they enjoy penis sword play with each other. These are quite literally the randiest species in the Animal Kingdom.
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Photo: Husdevet (Wikimedia)
The Porn Star In relation to the pandas being shown porn, there are also some animals which act like porn stars. The female Cichlid fish carries the eggs around in her mouth, meaning that in order for the male to fertilise them he effectively has to ejaculate into her mouth. This isn’t just fish being dirty though. The advantage is that the eggs are fertilised in an internal environment protecting against predators.
Photo: Crabchick (Wikimedia) Photo: Rob Bixby (Wikimedia)
The Courier
science.39
Monday 11 February 2013
thecourieronline.co.uk/science c2.science@ncl.ac.uk
Science Editor: James Simpson
Condom: A concise chronicle
Ta l k Ne rd y t o me
With the announcement that a new condom replicating, erm, the female anatomy is undergoing testing, we decided to take a look at the history of everyone’s faithful rubber friend
W
e begin our journey deep in Ancient Egypt to look at something which has shaped our society in a way the Pharaohs could never have imagined. The Ancient Egyptians rarely get credit for their greatest legacy: the condom. At the time of Ramses XI, linen sheaths were used in religious ceremonies as contraception and for protection against diseases (they did know a thing or two!). We then move to Second Century China where, shortly after the invention of paper, the Chinese were wrapping the stuff - re-enforced with silk around their members. The pioneers that they were, the Japanese initiated the use of carved tortoise shells and animal horns as protection. With this perspective perhaps the common ‘lack of sensation’ criticism of condoms nowadays would not be heard as much. After a few close encounters on Bizarre E.R, these carved condoms quickly fell out of favour and were replaced by much humbler replacements, such as lamb intestines. Consequently they only covered the head of the penis prompting the infamous womanizer Casanova to coin them ‘assurance caps’. 500 years later and the design of the condom had gone unchanged. Materials used had somewhat diversified from fine leather with drawstring (for the distinguished gent), to fish, calf and goat intestines for the thriftier individual. Eco-friendly options such as the recycle and resale of used condoms were also practiced. Interestingly a quick search of the web, unveils that animal membrane condoms are readily available to buy, sold under the fitting name of “Naturalamb” by Trojan. The invention of latex condoms in 1920 revolutionized the sexual market. It led people to become more adventurous and the first coloured condom was introduced in 1949. No longer a topic of taboo there’s a diverse range of tastes, colours and textures are available. One can even choose glow in the dark, music playing or celebrity endorsed condoms (JLS, Ke$ha etc.) for when you’re trying to woo your lover. More recently, condoms for people under the influence have been invented with straps which
Valentine’s Day is full of cheesy chat up lines. We geeks love a good chat up line, so Lauren Binney looks at the best geeky chat up lines for your amusement
A
mongst the usual cheese fest of “Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?” and “there must be something wrong with my eyes, I can’t take them off you” there are a few glimmers of slightly geeky fun. Here’s my pick of my personal favourite science related chat up lines.
1 Photo: Wikimedia
when pulled roll the condom down the penis. It’s almost like an emergency life jacket you might find on an airplane. Sorry guys, it doesn’t quite help the other problem you might encounter whilst drunk though! Nevertheless, out with the old and in with the new. The new silicone condom has been invented and looks like something you might have made in an origami arts and crafts class. Research shows
that silicone is less likely to transfer bacteria and viruses than latex, reducing the amount of sexual infections likely to be transferred. The ridged edging amplifies the pleasure that comes with a ribbed condom and can even double up as a sex toy. So boys and girls, get looking out for the new ‘origami’ condom which should be hitting shelves sometime in the next year or two! Fred Pilkington
Lessons in luscious love
Love: it’s complicated, exciting and a little bit terrifying, but what is it exactly? Lizzie Hampson delves into the depths of the human brain and finds out what makes us tick
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he majority of us will ask this perpetual question at least once in our lives and no doubt be given a variety of romantic and not all together convincing answers. Well, once again science is here to answer our questions and can tell us the truth about what really happens when you fall for that special somebody. Interestingly and perhaps not that surprisingly, chemical events in the brain of somebody who is falling in love are similar to those of somebody who is experiencing mental illness; this is largely due to biochemical cascades happening more frequently and with higher intensity than they normally would. Neuroscientists have suggested there are three stages to falling in love, each characterised by different chemical signals in the brain. Stage one: Lust. This stage is dominated by both testosterone and oestrogen, which are the hormones responsible for cranking up people’s sex drives. Therefore, it is no surprise that in those first magical months of meeting somebody you find sexually attractive, pretty much all you want to do, is do it. Stage two: Attraction. Here we’ve moved past the stage of purely sexual desire and into emotional grounds. In this stage an important group of neurotransmitters called monoamines start to get activated more frequently in our brains. Can’t stop thinking about somebody? Dopamine is a transmitter also activated by cocaine and nicotine and is thought to make us addicted to a person. That nervous, heart pounding feeling you get when
speaking to somebody you like is caused by norepinephrine, otherwise known as adrenaline and finally, serotonin, which makes us happy and too much of it can even send us temporarily insane. Stage three: Attachment. The stage after the monoamine cloud has cleared and you decide you actually really do want to commit. Two hormones help this to happen; oxytocin is a bonding chemical and is released by both sexes during orgasm, it is thought the more sex a couple has the deeper their e m o tional bond, an exc u s e if you needed one. The second hormone vas opressin is the “monogamy” chemical; as Photo: Wikimedia
long as this hormone is flowing you won’t desire anybody else which makes up the final ingredient of being in love.
“If I was an enzyme, I’d be DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes.” This lovely little line is something I’ve heard a few times upon telling people I’m a Biology student. Bit of a giggle to begin with, until I wore a dress and was told “If I was an enzyme, I’d be DNA helicase so I could unzip your dress”. If you’re going to use a geeky line, at very least make sure you slightly understand the concept behind it.
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“I wish I were adenine because then I could get paired with U.” Good old genetics, this one’s short, sweet, and if all else fails a decent revision technique for specific base pairing. “You’re like telophase, I admire your cleavage.” If you’re looking for a cheeky science chat up line this is your one. However you probably shouldn’t use it too seriously, non scientists may take this a little too literally and you could land yourself with a black eye and a face full of cheap booze!.
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“Your bosoms, they give me a hadron” One for the physicists. Again this one probably won’t be very funny to non scientists so use with caution. However used on a girl you spotted across the lecture theatre this could make a decent ice breaker
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“If I could rearrange the periodic table I’d put Uranium (U) and Iodine (I) together” Another short and sweet line which is more than likely to give fellow scientists at least a
titter. Now just remember, cheesy lines make for good ice breakers, but don’t use them too seriously as you’ll only be left with a slightly bruised ego.
Photo: Wikimedia
40.puzzles
Monday 11 February 2013
Puzzles
The Courier
Puzzles Editors: Tom Nicholson and Sally Priddle
Take on our Valentine’s Day-themed challenges and win free pints courtesy of the good people at MensBar
Crossword 1
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3
6
9
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13 14
15 17
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Across
1, 7 Jimmy Cliff hit ‘What Becomes of the ____ ____?’ (6, 7) 4 ‘Who’s the cat who won’t cop out when there’s danger all about? ___! You damn right.’ - Isaac Heyes, 1971 (5) 6 Bring one’s hands together (4) 7 See 1 across 9 Prolonged, angry remonstration (6) 11 A feature which sets something apart from competitors (1-1-1) 12 Ideal rural space (5) 13 Norwegian capital (4) 14 2001 Basement Jaxx hit (5) 17 Jim Morrison’s band, the ___ (5) 19, 20 down, 23 Song by the Smiths (10, 2, 1, 4) 22 Viscous matter (3) 23 See 18 across
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24 Gardening implement (3)
Down
Find yourself stumped? Check out The Courier’s website next week for the solutions
Supermarket Sweep “Hello everyone, Dale Winton here again. I’m having a romantic evening in this Valentine’s Day - guess how much I’m spending on my beau this year and you can win a voucher for MensBar.”
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Win a £4 MensBar voucher*
2 Broadcasting currently (2,3) 3 Belief that life is without meaning or purpose (8) 4 Self-styled Mr Boombastic (6) 5, 15 Dickens urchin; ‘Do You Really Like It’ hitmaker (6, 6) 8 State of extremely low mood (10) 10 Patterned with flowers (6) 15 Poem glorifying an event or individual (3) 16 See 5 down 18 Activated (2) 19 Expression of surprise (4) 20 A failure; to go limp (4) 21 See 19 across
In Dale’s basket this week:
- Asparagus (250g) - Chocolate sauce (325g) - Vaseline lip balm (20g) - Whipped cream (250g) - Prunes (500g) - Roasted peanuts (300g) - Moet & Chandon champagne (70cl)
=£?
Sudoku 3 4 1 8 2 1 9 6
1 8 5 6 4 6 9 4
1 6 3 2 5 3 5 7 9 8 4 7
*The first person to bring the completed crossword or Supermarket Sweep to The Courier office in the Students’ Union will be awarded the £4 prize
The Courier
bucssport.41
Monday 11 February 2013
Scutt strikes late in Stan Calvert dramatic derby draw Cup moved Men’s Football
Northumbria 3rds
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Newcastle 2nds
2
By Joey Barton at Bullocksteads
meant that the game was compelling throughout, while perhaps limiting the quality of both sides on show. Playing with the wind first half Newcastle were fastest out of the blocks pegging Northumbria back, whose goalkeeper James Smith was struggling to get any distance on his kicks, and therefore could not relieve the pressure. Unsurprisingly the first real chance of the game fell on just 7 minutes to the Royals when Gary McEachran poked James Armshaw-Bowen’s searching cross, marginally over the bar.
down just inside the box after cutting in from the right. Ben Jefferson took responsibility and coolly sent Nick Irving the wrong way by slotting the ball low to the keeper’s right hand side. The Royals responded excellently to this blow however and went close to immediately levelling the contest once again. Goodier’s set piece caused carnage in the Poly box as his curling cross found Watson whose header from point blank range was excellently stopped by Smith before Watson’s follow up was some-
Robbie Goodier and the elements combined to put Newcastle ahead with 12 minutes on the clock, as the winger’s free kick was inadvertently turned in at the back post by Northumbria defender Theo Clarke. The lead lasted just 8 minutes however as against the run of play Poly levelled when Ethan O’Hagan’s corner was comprehensively headed home by Ant Fernandez. Following their equaliser Northumbria improved and the rest of the first half proved to be an even affair in which both defences stood firm, with Aaron Greening, in particular, excelling for the Royals. Perhaps buoyed by having the wind at their backs Northumbria moved on top for the first time in the game at the start of the second period. First, only a goal saving last-ditch tackle from Joe Watson prevented Ben Burnett from putting the home side in front after some good build up play. Later, just 3 minutes after the interval, Burnett, who had typified the emotion involved in any Posh-Poly derby when denied a first half penalty, was brought
how kept out by an acrobatic defender on the line. Newcastle’s search for an equaliser did leave them exposed at the back at times and midway through the half Northumbria made a mess of a 3-on-1 break as indecisiveness from Burnett and Jefferson kept Newcastle in the game. The Royals made the most of this let off with 15 minutes remaining as Scutt pounced on a horrendous short back pass from Poly to calmly stroke the ball past Smith in the Northumbria goal. The home team were denied in the closing stages by a superbly brave piece of goalkeeping from Irving who heroically threw his head and his hands at the feet of the onrushing Northumbria substitute to twice keep Poly at bay. The Royals went closest to snaching a dramatic winner at the death when Scutt’s left foot shot on the turn had the keeper scrambling but Smith held well. The result keeps the sides in mid table and both may see it as a chance missed in the challenge to catch the unbeaten Sheffield 2nd and Sunderland 1st teams at the top of the table.
“A combination of the drenched grass and an extremely strong wind meant the game was compelling throughout”
Smith
Robson
Fernandez
Davies
Bonner
Oliver
Beckett
O’Hagan Jefferson
Burnett
Scutt
Bubos
Goodier
Randalls Watson
Southgate
Clarke
McEachran
Greening ArmshawBowen
Norman Irving
Newcastle 2nd team grabbed a late share of the spoils at Bullocksteads sports ground, as they drew 2-2 away to Northumbria 3rd team. Both sides will feel they could have won a typically fiery Toon derby, but Henry Scutt’s 75th minute equaliser for ‘Posh’ ensured that both sets of players went away feeling both frustrated and satisfied with the result. Playing on a sodden pitch at Bullocksteads, conditions certainly played their part as a combination of the drenched grass and an extremely strong wind
Back of the net Video of the week
continued from back page It does not appear that Gateshead could have done much more to prevent the situation after they invested between £40-50,000 on the pitch over the summer; since then the bad weather conditions that have affected all outdoor sports around Newcastle, including many university teams, have conspired against the ground staff and made the pitch unplayable. Northumbria may be keen to make the move to Kingston Park on a permanent basis, but there are some major problems with this, aside from the issue previously mentioned regarding it being an exclusively rugby venue that cannot host the variety of sports which Gateshead is able to. There is also the issue of costs at Kingston Park because food, drink and security would have to be brought in without the help of Gateshead Council. In addition to this, there is the potential that ticket sales will be lower with fewer clubs likely to travel to the venue, and even casual fans may find
The teams emerge at Gateshead International Stadium for last years’ Stan Calvert Photography: Moises Bedrossien
Spot the ball
Testing times
A
1) What team won the 2012 Super Bowl? 2) Before moving to Miami Heat in 2012, what NBA team did LeBron James play for? 3) What is the nickname of the MLB team from Seattle? 4) The Stanley Cup is the championship trophy for which American sport? 5) In what state is the 2014 Super Bowl scheduled to take place?
the new location a less attractive prospect with more travel involved and fewer sports to watch once they get there. The Stan Calvert event has been able to break even financially in the past, but it is questionable whether that will happen this year when the event is moved to Kingston Park. There are also concerns that the atmosphere will not be the same as at Gateshead which has been consistently good in previous years. If it is the case that there are fewer spectators there is a risk that the prestige of the varsity event will be eroded. All of these factors combined mean that it would be controversial if the event were to be moved to Kingston Park on a lasting basis. The unfortunate conditions at Gateshead International Stadium this year means that the compromise of moving to Kingston Park seems to be the best option. However, there will be many, particularly on the Newcastle side, that hope that this move is not permanent and that the competition will return to GIS in 2014.
B
C
D
E
1 2
1.) New York Giants 2.)Cleveland Cavaliers 3.) Seattle Mariners 4.)Ice hockey 5.) New Jersey
Tip of the week Super Bowl XLVII Power Outage | The Rock Entrance: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5qlAR1WO84
After the extended hiatus to the game due to a ‘stadium power outage’ caused much frustration, this video gives an alternative reason for the lights going out...
Tweet of the week - GFNFrance - @GFN_France
“Zlatan #Ibrahimovic (on the arrival of #Beckham): ‘Now we’re not only good but we’re handsome too.’” (6 Feb) Ibrahimovic relishing linking up with the suave Mr Beckham at PSG.
Now they have the ultimate football icon under their wing, perhaps betting on PSG to win the Champions League outright is worth a trip to the bookies (Odds from Sky Bet )
20/1
3 4 5 6 Want to win a £4 MensBar voucher? E-mail courier.sport@ncl.ac.uk where you think the ball is.
F
42.sportfeatures
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Star spangled sports
After the recent Super Bowl hype, The Courier discusses two other major fixtures of the American sporting calendar before turning to the main event... BASEBALL WORLD SERIES The World Series is played every October and is the culmination of the American baseball season that kicks off annually in early April. The ‘Series’ is as the name suggests a series of matches (best of 7) played out between the winners of the American League and National League (confusingly enough also a league based in the USA) pennants. Historically, the American League has held the upper hand winning 62 of the 108 World Series crowns. The baseball (MLB) season itself is an epic slog of skill and stamina, as each side plays 162 games in the Regular season in the space of just six months, before the thirty franchises are whittled down to just ten who qualify for the play offs, which begin in early October. The World Series, commonly referred to as The Fall Classic, admittedly can-
not boast anything on the scale of the world famous half -time show at the Super Bowl, in terms of non-sporting entertainment, partly due to the more drawn out nature of a seven game series. However, it is still an enormous event in which each break between innings is packed with competitions, on pitch entertainment (such as a mascot race) and tradition (most popularly through the singing of God Bless America and the ‘Seventh Inning Stretch’). The Series is hosted by the competing teams, making for sell-out crowds and a great atmosphere at every game, perhaps more so than if the games were played at a neutral venue. The Fall Classic has a long history, having first been played back in 1903, when the Boston Americans (later to become Boston Red Sox) beat the Pitts-
burgh Pirates 5-3 in a best of a nine game series. It could be argued that 1884 actually saw the birth of the World Series, when Providence Grays defeated New York Metropolitans 3-0 in the series to secure the crown. However, this competition is not a direct predecessor of today’s World Series as we know it, and therefore 1903 should be seen as the birth of the modern World Series, which has been played every year since, excluding 1904 and 1994. Easily the most successful team in World Series history have been American League side New York Yankees with 27 Championships. St. Louis Cardinals, the 2011 champions, are the second most successful franchise in MLB history, with 11 titles, which also makes them the most decorated team from the National League. The longest
serving team in MLB history to have never won a World Series pennant are Texas Rangers, who joined the league in 1960. The Rangers have come much closer in recent times, reaching their first World Series in 2010, before reappearing in the Fall Classic of 2011, when they twice came within a strike of the title in Game 6 of the Series, before eventually losing a thrilling series 4-3 to the Cardinals. The 2012 World Series saw San Francisco Giants secure their second title in three years by sweeping the Detroit Tigers 4-0 last October. Joey Barton Photography: Getty Images
NBA PLAYOFFS AND ALL-STAR GAME It cannot be denied that America does sport differently to most other nations. As anyone who watched the Superbowl half-time show saw, glitz and glamour are very much the order of the day, with performances so ostentatious that Danny Boyle may have thought twice. Sport is second only to religion in some states, and during Playoffs it possibly moves up one place, with near fanatical levels of attendance at all levels (Indiana College basketball averages 15,000 fans per home game) and people turning up hours before to hold impromptu barbeque parties in the car parks. Think Stan Calvert, but with more grilling meat. While some sports have strong geographic links, basketball covers most of the country in an even spread, with thirty NBA teams; one in almost every major city. A gruelling 66-game season simply acts as the support act for the main event, the playoffs for the NBA Championships. At the midpoint of this season comes the All-Star game, where the top players from the Eastern Divisions play their counterparts from the Western Divisions in a spectacular game where players will tend
Miami Heat’s LeBron James: an All-Star regular Photography: Getty Images
to showcase their individual skills. The game this year will be the 62nd meeting of the two conferences, taking place on Sunday in Houston. Starting players for the All-Star game are selected by the fans, meaning big names vie for the coveted spots, and are always introduced at the game with more razzmatazz than a Lady Gaga concert. This year for the Western Conference, Kobe Bryant topped the votes, starting his 15th consecutive All-Star Game, whilst LeBron James won the votes from the East. As is often the case, the big teams of the NBA dominate the selections this year, with San Antonio and Miami sending three players, Los Angeles sending four (two for the Lakers, two for the Clippers) and New York and Boston each sending two. In recent years, the West has been dominant, winning four of the last six matches – with the winning conference matching the winning Playoff team four times as well. The All-Star game can be seen as the turning point of the season, meaning there are only a few weeks left to grab the coveted playoff spots. As only eight teams from each conference qualify, games become cagier and results ever more important as qualification and home court advantage start to cause tension – often spilling over in the actions of players and coaches. Finally, once the season closes, two months of Playoffs begin, with teams playing in the best of seven matches to move through to the Championship games between their counterparts in the other Conference. Form goes out the window here, as Philadelphia’s quarterfinals win over top seeds Chicago and near humbling of Boston last season proved. This season looks similar to the previous one, with many of the same teams occupying the sought-after Playoff positions. The All-Star game will give a good indicator of Conference dominance, but the four-month wait to see who will lift the Championship simply adds excitement and intrigue to an already exciting season. James Docherty
The Courier
featuressport.43
Monday 11 February 2013
Super Bowl XLVII
Fraternal rivalry, Beyonce and a blackout, Chris Taylor reports on one of the most dramatic, exciting and unexpected Super Bowls in recent history Super Bowl XLVII was an odd one simply because no-one saw it coming. Super statistician, Nate Silver, who managed to predict the winner of all US states in the 2012 Presidential Election, had his money on a Falcons-Seahawks final. During the playoffs, confidence surrounding Baltimore Ravens was particularly low. There is, after the game, a general consensus that a Ravens-49ers match up was going to lead to an exciting game, even without a 34-minute power failure in the 3rd quarter. This Super Bowl seemed more like the season finale of a TV show than the final game of the season. For both teams, it was one of storylines and each one was wrapped up rather neatly and with a hell of a lot of gusto. The backstory behind the game made the actual events on the field so much more exciting than they already were, the score at the end only showing half of the story. The first major story was the Cain and Abel battle between Jim and John Harbaugh, opposing coaches of San Francisco and Baltimore respectively. This is the first time two brothers have ever faced off as opposing coaches in the Super Bowl. Leading to the slightly cringeworthy title of ‘The HarBowl’, it became both a battle to win the Vince Lombardi Trophy but also to decide who is the better child in the Harbaugh family… probably. It was also a battle of the quarterbacks. Joe Flacco, in his contract year, had a very uneven season. Many commentators were declaring him too unreliable to be of any worth going into the playoffs so he clearly had a lot to make up for in the eyes of the press. Colin Kaepernick, on the other end of the spectrum,
John (l) and Jim (r) Harbaugh Photography: Getty Images to the decisions of the Harbaughs as well as the skill of the quarterbacks. The first touchdown came four and a half minutes into the first half after the 49ers
“This Super Bowl seemed more like the season finale of a TV show than the final game of the season” had only played in nine previous NFL games, making the Super Bowl his tenth after he replaced Alex Smith who was out with concussion midway through the season. However, Jim Harbaugh had clearly seen that Kaepernick was capable of taking over from a quarterback with one of the best competition percentages in the league this season, so eyes were very heavily on the chosen one. This Super Bowl saw the end of a seventeen year long career for Baltimore linebacker, Ray Lewis, who announced his retirement before the play-offs began. As one of the most vocal and de-
had failed to make any headway on their first offensive play after they were caught with an illegal formation. After the penalty was given due to 49ers’ Ahmad Brooks stepping offside, Joe Flacco hit Anquan Boldin as he raced and leapt for a touchdown. David Akers responded on the next drive with a 36-yard field goal, but the frustration for the 49ers was palpable, and it would not be their first disappointment. After a promising next drive, their following two drives ended up with turnovers; a fumble at the Ravens 24 (stopping any chance of a field goal and led to Ravens drive that ended in a touchdown
voted players for the Ravens, Lewis has had a rocky career after being involved in a double homicide in 2000, yet, over the years, he has turned from a plucky youngster to something akin to an overthe-top preacher making him one of the most notorious players of recent years. Ultimately, the game itself came down
from tight end Dennis Pitta, one yard from the end zone) and an interception by Ed Reed making Kaepernick the first 49ers quarterback to be picked off in a Super Bowl. Surprisingly, this did not knock the spirit of Baltimore, as, on their next drive from their 44, Flacco connected
“The first major story was the Cain and Abel battle between Jim and John Harbaugh”
with Jacoby Jones after two incomplete passes. Flacco had underthrown and knocked Jones to the ground as he struggled to adjust, but San Francisco cornerback Chris Culliver failed to take him down and Jones got to his feet and danced his way to the end zone for a touchdown. Despite the 49ers responding with another field goal before half time, the score board, at 21-6, was showing a very one sided story. After a pop-fuelled half time show with the legend that is Beyonce, Ravens were clearly pumped up from hearing the likes of ‘Crazy in Love’ and ‘Halo’, and returned a kick off for a 108 yard touchdown thanks again to Jacoby Jones, a New Orleans native which made his two touchdowns all the more special from playing at home. However, minutes later, the Superdome went into blackout. Unsure why exactly (some say Beyonce’s set was so exciting the electricity could not handle it or Ravens linebacker Terrell Suggs joking that Jim Harbaugh gave out “Order 66”), it proved to be very important to the game itself. The momentum completely changed and the 49ers began to dominate. Kaepernick hit Crabtree for a 31 yard touchdown after he broke free from a few tackles on the way. After Flacco was sacked on third down and the teams exchanged punts, a poor punt from Baltimore’s Sam Koch was returned to the Baltimore 20, the drive culminating in a Frank Gore touchdown from the 6. Kaepernick then ran the ball himself for a 15-yard touchdown, but they failed to pick up the two point conversion turning it into a 31-29 game with Ravens responding immediately with a field goal. Unfortunately, the 49ers did not have enough time to respond so the game ended at a close 34-31 to Baltimore.
PLAY OF THE GAME
Flacco comes of age with gutsy play call
On 3rd and inches, with the score at 31-29, Baltimore Ravens Quarterback Joe Flacco audibled to change the play from a run up the middle to a back shoulder throw. The play not only signalled a significant gamble in a high pressure situation but the coming of age of a passer much maligned for being ‘just another guy’ despite his exceptional statistical and post-season success. Conventional thinking dictates that with just inches to reach a first down, and gain a new set of downs, the play with the greatest likelihood of success is a run up the middle, a play akin to a centre in rugby on a crash ball. With an in-form Ray Rice at running back and a monstrous offensive line, that has made running the ball down the throats of their opponents their offensive identity for over a decade, there was every reason for the Ravens to send Rice haring up the middle. Accordingly, the San Francisco 49ers defence (red markers) set up in a conventional 3-4 alignment, expecting a Rice (gray marker) run. Instead, Flacco (yellow marker), the fifth-year Quarterback from the small-school University of Delaware, metaphorically put his balls on the chopping block by changing the play at the line and throwing one of the riskiest passes in football, a back shoulder fade. On a five-step drop in a shrinking pocket, Flacco faked a pass to throw off a ball-swatting 49ers defensive lineman before threading a ball towards the sideline. It’s not the kind of pass that requires a rocket arm but a deft touch to take the pace of the ball and essentially loft the ball up for the receiver to ‘go and get it’. It places a lot of trust in the receiver to win his one-on-one match up and Anquan Boldin, with his magnet-like hands, did that against Carlos Rogers. This one play demonstrated the progression from ‘Average Joe’ to MVP Joe. George Sandeman
44.sportintramural
Monday 11 February 2013
Medics issue title warning Division One Football Medics 1sts
9
Borussia Forsyth
1
By Nick Gabriel at Longbenton
Anderson Harris Emmerson
Watson
Davison
Jones
Fretwell
Edwards Anderson
Watkinson Campbell
McAvoy
Kemp
Smith
Simpson
Carson
Peterson
McManus
Blofield
Clarke
Whiter
O’Brien
Last Wednesday, Medic’s first team provided the few spectators that braved the blizzard conditions with an exhibition of excellence, in a complete mismatch at Longbenton. The future doctors cruised to a 9-1 win over Division One strugglers Borussia Forsyth. Four goals from top scorer Nathan Campbell, three from Ali Watson and one apiece for Dave Edwards and substitute David Macmillan contributed to the drubbing, with Forsyth’s Stuart Mcavoy notching his luckless side’s solitary strike. A whopping 12 points separated the sides at kick off. With
such a distinct gulf in class between the two outfits, it came as little surprise when the future doctors opened the scoring early on, as lively wide man Watson was on hand to smash home a neat cutback from Campbell with five minutes on the clock. The Medics then doubled their advantage minutes after the restart. This time it was Campbell’s turn to open his account. Having been chopped down in the opposition box, the forward proceeded to dust himself down and step up to take the spot-kick, coolly slotting the ball home to the keeper’s left. With 15 minutes gone, the fired up Medics once more made their helpless opposition pay for some sloppy defending. On this occasion, Watson managed to stab the ball into an unguarded net following a Matty Anderson corner that led to a frenzied goalmouth scramble. If their start to the affair hadn’t been bad enough, Borussia’s prolonged misery showed no sign of coming to an end. The Medics made it four mid-way through the half, as Campbell steered a cross from Andy Harris past Forsyth’s goalkeeper Tom O’Brien, with an excellent cushioned volley. It was at that point that Borussia had seemingly managed to stop the bleeding as, for the first time in the game, they began to enjoy a spell of possession, fashioning a number of openings as a consequence. Twice in quick succession opportunities fell to the feet of forward Andrew Kemp but he was denied on both occasions by Medics’ goalkeeper Dale Anderson, who showed a surprising level of alertness to thwart the lively attacker despite having had very little to do in the game’s opening exchanges. Un s u r p r i s i n g l y, Fo r s y t h’s threatening period was short-
lived, as Watson completed his hat-trick with half an hour played. This time the winger was quickest to react to a loose ball in the penalty area after Campbell had seen his shot well saved by O’Brien in the Forsyth goal. Borussia did however manage to pull a goal back before halftime, as a neat piece of link-up play between Oli Smith and Tom Simpson down the right-hand side saw the ball played into the feet of McAvoy, who was then able to slide the ball home from 10 yards out. Nevertheless the Medic’s fivegoal lead was restored on the stroke of the interval, as Borussia failed to deal with a routine Medic goal-kick. Campbell then showed great composure to run onto the bouncing ball, steady himself, and lob the ball over the advancing O’Brien to complete his firsthalf hat-trick. Having clearly been subjected to a touch of the hairdryer treatment from injured captain Hugo Tapp at the interval, Forsyth began the second period in rejuvenated fashion. First, Medics’ keeper Anderson had to be alive to smother the ball at the feet of Smith after the energetic trequartista found himself through on goal, before centre-half Alex Blofield’s headed effort was met with another smart save from the ever reliable Anderson. In spite of this positive period of pressure following the restart, Borussia inexplicably proceeded to concede another three without reply. A beautifully crafted curling effort from Edwards was followed by a marvelous solo effort by Campbell, his fourth goal of the game and sixteenth in all competitions this season. Substitute Macmillan completed the rout with his side’s ninth goal of the game late on. There was still time for the
Tuesday afternoon on the 5th of February, the table has been severely altered, with four teams in contention for the top two positions. Hot Shots have consistently sat top of the league, having impressively only lost one match this year. Combined Honours Society had been hot on the heels of the Hot Shots all season, but after a disappointing loss to the league leaders on the 5th, they have dropped down to third position. Usually a draw has little impact on this league, but it worked wonders for MANSOC who progressed into second position. The draw had detrimental effects for MANSOC’s opponents, Senoritas, who slipped from 6th to 7th position.
The tell-tale story of the day came from the Mathletes. Sitting bottom of the league, the expectation for a victory against a team who were 3 positions higher was admittedly low, especially after their 28-5 loss to Combined Honours 2 in November. However, they managed to rack up a momentous victory against Combined 2, despite also having to play with one player short. Regardless of it being a tight score line of 14-12, it was an important victory nonetheless, as it means Mathletes have a chance to avoid coming bottom of the table with two matches left to play, with 7th position only four points ahead. It was a hard day at the office for last year’s league winners Uni Hockey. After a disappointing
The Courier
Medics’ Ali Watson tries to turn Forsyth’s Stuart McAvoy Photography: Nick Gabriel
Medics to come within a width of the post of entering into double figures, as midfielder Josh Davison watched his stoppage time penalty rebound back off the woodwork, after left-winger
Anderson had been fouled. This thrashing cements Forsyth’s awful first half to the season. The prime relegation candidates remain rooted to the foot
of the table, still looking for their first points of the campaign. Meanwhile, with their local rivals also narrowly winning 4-3 against Barca-Law-Na, the Medics stay second in the table, a
start to the season with losses against the top two, Hot Shots and Combined Honours 1, the hockey girls had a strong few games before the Christmas break, including a nineteen goal win over Senoritas. After the
Christmas break they were sitting third in the league, and still in with a chance of regaining their title. However, on Tuesday they suffered an uncharacteristic loss to the hands of Geog Soc, who they
had beaten 18-5 in October. This means they dropped down to fourth, and Geography moved up a place to 6th. After Tuesday’s events, Hot Shots have become uncatchable.
Hotshots and Ninjas lead the way Intra Mural Netball By Francesca Fitzsimmons Every Tuesday from 4-5pm, eight teams meet in the Intra Mural netball league. Despite being played ‘just for fun’, there is an undeniable competitive spirit on court week after week. With the season coming to a close, the race is on for the title of league champions, and this year the standard is even higher than before. With three matches left to play, there were three teams still in with a chance of winning the league. However, following a dramatic
League Tables Tuesday Netball Leagues
Tuesday 4-5pm
Tuesday 5-6pm
Team
Pld
W
D
L
F
A
Pts
Team
Pld
W
D
L
F
A
Pts
1
Hotshots
12
9
2
1
144
51
40 1
Netball Ninjas
12
10
0
2
225
102
40
2
MANSOC
12
7
1
4
138
89
30 2
ACCSOC
12
10
0
2
175
103
40
3
Combined Honours Society
12
7
1
4
121
116
30 3
Pollies Dollies
12
8
0
4
164
126
32
4
Uni Hockey
11
7
0
4
149
84
28 4
Medics
12
7
1
4
158
129
30
5
Combined Honours Society 2 11
3
2
6
117
126
16 5
Time Team
12
4
1
7
117
154
18
6
Geog Soc
12
4
0
8
108
145
16 6
Agrics Netball
12
4
0
8
116
137
16
7
Senoritas
12
3
2
7
73
143
16 7
Chem Eng
12
3
0
9
84
183
12
The Courier
intramuralsport.45
Monday 11 February 2013
Honours even in humanities clash Division Three Football Politic Thistle
2
Newhist FC
2
By Josh Walton at Longbenton
Clarke Marsala
Ramsey
Macdon-
Charleston DuFresne
Greenwood
Benson
Walton Robinson Dina Minto Soden
Lawrence
Robinson
Ancrum
Wood
Thornton
single point behind their course rivals, albeit having played a game less. Undoubtedly, if both Medic sides are to continue their seemingly unrelenting form, the clash
between the two on 6th of March should be penciled into the Intra Mural sporting calendar as a potential Division One title decider.
League Tables
crum began to throw in huge tackles. At this point the game looked as if it could go either way. Thistle winger Henry Du Fresne was proving particularly problematic, and with 70 minutes on the clock he was inevitably brought down in the box. A cool spot-kick into the top left corner from captain Owen Elias then put Thistle 2-1 up. Newhist were obviously deflated, Thistle sensed all three points and relentlessly attacked. James Thornton was forced into action on more than one occasion. The introduction of Jacob Mur-
tests from the Newhist players. The game shifted from end-toend, with both sides’ goalkeepers and defenders proving difficult to beat. The first goal came after 40 minutes. A long ball over the top found Thistle’s Thornton. Despite there being a hint of offside, the forward then demonstrated a brilliant touch and cool finish put his side 1-0 up at the break. The second period produced more free flowing football, with both sides justifying their lofty league position. David Robinson and Ray Crisp forced two fantastic acrobatic saves from the Thistle ‘keeper. However, the Politic stopper was powerless to prevent Newhist’s equaliser; Walton found himself with a pocket of space, spun the ball onto his left foot and lobbed the keeper from 25 yards. Newhist were visibly buoyed, as Will Robinson and Lewis An-
phy helped to lift Newhist spirits and Thistle needlessly conceded a free kick just past half way. Crisp lifted a sublime ball into the mixer which was met by Walton’s attempt at an overhead kick. The ball fell straight into the path of late substitute Martin Thomson, who fired home from three yards. Newhist applied more pressure with Will Robinson and Michael Minto coming close to snatching a late winner. Wave upon wave of attack was absorbed by the Thistle centre backs; both of whom had outstanding games. By the time the referee called time on proceedings, either team could have claimed all three points, but in fairness neither deserved to lose. As such both teams will welcome the solitary point in a very tight, competitive league.
“The 3G pitch suited both sides’ passing style, and made a welcome change from the Close House marshes”
Elias
Thornton Hughes
Crisp
the game, against the run of play, Tom Soden fed striker Josh Walton who outpaced the Thistle centre half but placed his shot inches wide. From then on it was Newhist who dominated possession, with Tayo Dina causing all sorts of confusion with his trickery. Newhist pressure eventually led to a corner, which found Walton at the back post who guided his lobbed header over the static Thistle ‘keeper. Mid-celebration a Thistle defender was deemed to have cleared the goalbound effort off of the line, despite furious pro-
After what seemed like a lifetime without Intra Mural action, the race for Division 3 promotion finally resumed last Wenesday, despite the cold weather and windy conditions at Longbenton. The 3G pitch suited both sides’ passing style and made a welcome change from the Close House marshes. It was Thistle who started the brighter, with their midfield feeding balls into the path of striker Ollie Thornton, only for his namesake, Newhist keeper James Thornton to produce a series of outstanding close range saves. Thistle were dominant in the air, with centre-half Cristiano Marsala winning everything that came at him. However twenty minutes into
Man of the Match: Tayo Dina
The Secret Intra Mural Footballer
#8 Match Fixing Europol’s expected investigation into match fixing caused quite a stir on campus this week, as it was revealed that one recent high-profile Intra Mural game was allegedly subject to match fixing. The idea that an Intra Mural match could have been subject to outside influence comes as a great surprise to me. Personally, I have always felt that corruption on this scale was something confined to foreign leagues, where the players are of lesser moral standing, Northumbria for example. I must however admit to concern for the younger members of our squad. Corrupted by outrageous Intra Mural pay packets, I can think of a few team mates who spend rather too much of their time whiling away the early hours of the morning in Aspers, gambling away their future financial security. It is not too hard to imagine their fledgling selves accepting a bribe in their desperation to fund the gambling habit. In my view, it is about time the Sports Centre considered the establishment of a treatment centre for recovering addicts. The story even took a further twist this past weekend, as the Medics 1sts denied any allegations of wrongdoing in relation to their 9-1 win over Dyslexic Untied which secured them the title on goal difference in 2011. Video footage showing Intra Mural referee Steve Catchpole swigging champagne with the Medics had aroused the suspicions of the authorities - but no evidence of wrongdoing was ever uncovered. It is hoped that all accusations will soon be put to bed and we can all carry on doing what we do best at 2pm on a Wednesday afternoon.
Wednesday 11 a-side Football Division 1 1
Division 13
Division 2
Team
Pld
W
D
L
F
A
Pts
Newcastle Medics 2nds
7
5
1
1
27
12
16
1
Team
Pld
W
D
L
F
A
Pts
Ecosoccer
4
4
0
0
13
5
12
1
Division 41
Team
Pld
W
D
L
F
A
Pts
Pld Pld WW
DD
LL
Jesmondino FC
4
3
1
0
23
7
10
1 1 Sub-Standard Barca Law NaLiege
Team Team
6 12
49
21
0 2 3350 1515 1428
F F A A Pts Pts
0 2 2636 8 20 1026
2
Newcastle Medics 1sts
6
5
0
1
30
5
15
2
The Hurricanes
5
4
0
1
17
12
12
2
Politic Thistle FC
6
3
1
2
15
15
10
2 2 FCNewcastle Bayern Toonich Medics 1sts
4 12
38
12
3
Henderson Hall FC
5
3
1
1
13
10
10
3
Aftermath FC
4
3
0
1
20
12
9
3
Newhist FC
6
3
1
2
14
15
10
3 3 The Establishment Henderson Hall
5 12
37
01
2 4 1641 1229 922
4
Barca-Law-Na
5
2
0
3
19
13
6
4
Roman Villa FC
5
2
0
3
11
15
6
4
Newcastle Dynamos
6
3
1
2
9
11
10
Dyslexic Untied 4 4 Thundercats
4 12
26
11
1 5 2232 8 26 719
5
Dyslexic Untied
4
2
0
4
11
21
6
5
Boca Seniors
4
1
1
2
11
14
4
5
Brown Magic F.C.
5
3
0
14
11
9
9
5 5 Geomatics Crayola FC
6 12
25
00
4 7 1518 1822 615
6
Crayola
5
2
0
3
8
18
3
6
Lokomotiv
5
1
1
3
16
20
4
6
Multiple Scoregasms
5
0
1
4
7
13
1
6 (R) Trigger Happy Aftermath
5 12
23
00
3 9 1314 2747 6 9
7
Borussia Forsyth
6
0
0
6
7
36
0
7
Castle Leazes
5
0
0
5
4
14
0
7
Bio Neverlosen
4
0
1
3
2
12
1
7 (R) Crystal CastlePhallus Leazes
6 12
01
01
6 10 5 12 4242 0 4
Top Goalscorers
7: Hurworth (Barca)
Top Goalscorers
18: Batham (Medic 2s)
4: Robson (Dyslexic), Holt (Medics 2s), Womersley (Crayola), Hoctor (Barca)
13: Duckworth (Hurricanes)
10: Campbell (Medic 1s),
Fixtures - 13/2/13
5: McCrory (Hurricanes), Jones (Aftermath), Wilson (After
Division One Newcastle Medics 1sts vs Dyslexic Utd Close House 2.00pm Newcastle Medics 2nds vs Crayola Longbenton Grass 2.00pm Borussia Forsyth vs Barca-Law-Na Longbenton 3G 8.00pm
Division Two Roman Villa vs Ecosoccer Boca Srs vs Hurricanes Castle Leazes vs Aftermath
Top Goalscorers
math) 4: Stacey (Ecosoccer)
10: Thornton (Politic Thistle)
3:Wren (Brown Magic) Walton (Newhist)
3: Golzari (Aftermath),
6: Smith (Jesmondino),
2: Grosvenor (Scorgasms),
Division Three Close House 2 2.00pm Newhist vs Jesmondino Close House 3 2.00pm Longbenton Grass 2 2.00pm Scorgasms vs Bio Longbenton Grass 3 2.00pm Redhall 5 2.00pm Politic Thistle vs Brown Magic Redhall 4 2.00pm
Top Goalscorers 20: Wimshurst (SubStandard Liege) 9: Armour (Toonich) 6: Prichard (Thundercats)
5. O’Callaghan (Toonich) 4: Page (Toonich), Parkinson (Liege)
Division Four Establishment vs Crystal Phallus Thundercats vs Geomatics Bayern Toonich vs Sub-Standard
Close House 4 2.00pm Close House 5 2.00pm Longbenton 3G 3.45pm
46.sportbucs
Monday 11 February 2013
The Courier
Royals stick it out for point Men’s Hockey
Manchester 1sts
1
Newcastle 1sts
1
By Ben Underwood in Manchester On the back of a run of disappointing results, Newcastle University men’s Hockey 1st XI travelled to top of the table Manchester to face an opposition who were yet to drop points this season and who boasted U21 internationals. This was obviously no easy task but was one that the Royals relished the prospect of. The game started slowly for the Royals, who appeared nervous in the opening exchanges. Possession was handed cheaply to Manchester, but staunch defending allowed the Royals to get to grips with the game. After settling the nerves, the Royals began to control the midfield, with the imperious trio of Kempe, Ramsden and Gowing starting to pull the strings. Manchester again rallied to put pressure on the Royals’, but Callum Mackenzie, not one to run at the first sign of trouble, stood resolute with defensive partner Max Underwood, who had a characteristically committed performance. With half-time approaching and Newcastle improving every passing minute, chances began to arrive. First, Ben Underwood deflected inches wide before a surging run from Miles and an inch perfect pass forced some
fine work from the Manchester keeper to deny a simple tap in for the Suffolk native Underwood junior. A goal was not long in the making - after some fantastic work by DoddMoore, a penalty corner was awarded. The resulting penalty corner was improvised by the quick thinking Kempe and found its way to Ben Underwood who was on hand to turn the ball in with a deft touch. The second half started well, with Newcastle playing some excellent hockey and talismanic Gowing galvanising his men through encouragement and some superb link-up play. Kempe was the engine room, giving license to Colville and Russell-Jones to be more forward thinking. This materialised into some guilt edge chances. First, Ben Underwood should have scored, but fluffed his chance to double his tally as well as the lead. Soon after his older brother clattered the post following a well-worked short corner. With 5 minutes to play, Manchester levelled, as a slick short corner routine narrowly evaded the veteran German keeper Linden. Undoubtedly it was a deserved equaliser, but one which reinvigorated the visiting Royals. However the away side were unable to muster a late winner, ultimately having to settle for a respectable draw. This was a good result for a side who showed heart to pick themselves up following the disappointment of last week. Man of the Match was undoubtedly Ben Gowing, who put in a real captain’s performance that typified his squads work ethic and commitment. Next up the Royals return to the fortress of Longbenton, for a cup-tie against Nottingham Trent.
Brilliant Blades are champions Men’s Fencing Newcastle 2nds York 2nds
135 66
By Alex Walchester in Sports Hall Newcastle Blades finished a triumphant season with a dominant victory over a dysfunctional and tardy York. Having already waited an epoch for their arrival, Newcastle were raring to go and took the initiative in the form of an early lead. A sabre team of Paul “the Veteran” McGenity, “Gorgeous” Skipper George Flewitt and David “Mad” Mallinson combined aggression and shear bloody mindlessness to brutalise York into submission. Despite an attempt at a fight back, the Blades crushed any remaining life out of the York sabre team winning the weapon 45-28. With their opponents reeling, Newcastle continued their astounding assault in the foil and produced one of the most dominant performances seen in BUCS history. An outstanding Nick
“The Italian Stallion” Favero trampled his unfortunate opponents, despite conceding a hit for the first time since before Christmas, earning him “Dick of the Day”. Alex “Badger” Walchester and Grant “El Presidente” Turnbull continued the magic as hit followed hit followed hit leaving York clinging on by their fingers, which Newcastle then stamped on. A performance more destructive than the combined weapon systems of the Death Star meant that the weapon was won by an unprecedented 45-3. With victory certain, Newcastle eased off slightly as Epee started. “Gorgeous” George got things going and, with support from El Presidente and “Audacious” Anton Chan, played the match out emphatically. As calm and assured as a Michael Parkinson interview, the Blades took all that York could conjure and then threw it back in their face with precision and timing at a level that would make Swiss clockmakers jealous. Epee finished a comfortable 45-35 giving an impressive final score of 135-66. A dominant season is now at an end for Newcastle Mens 2nd Fencing Team. The undefeated league champions will now look to the future and an intriguing season in the next division up and what success may lie there.
Newcastle’s Ali Banton tackles a Durham player Photography: Ralph Blackburn
Blistering Durham Men’s Rugby Union Newcastle 1sts
12
Durham 1sts
41
By Ralph Blackburn Sports Editor The awful weather that has plagued the rugby calendar has hit Newcastle the worst. This was only their seventh game of the season. Meanwhile their opponents Durham had played twelve games prior to this encounter. Despite some encouraging performances, this lack of games mean Newcastle find themselves anchored to the bottom of the table. This however would not have been one of the fixtures in hand the Royals
would have been targeting on winning, with their local neighbours running away with the title, having been unbeaten all season, and standing as current BUCS national champions. The Royals must have thought the weather was haunting them when, at 41-0 down, the snow began to cascade down. It cut the spectators in half, however Newcastle literally weathered the storm and ran over a couple of scores in the final ten minutes, as the sun began to come out, to give the score line a slightly more respectable look. Durham showed their power in the first minute, using their forwards to barge Newcastle back from the 50m line, to about fifteen metres, with open side flanker Duncan Finney taking several Royals to pull him to the earth. After conceding a penalty, Newcastle were made to pay further for their indiscretion when charging Durham hooker Joshua Payne smashed over in the left
hand corner. Despite the howling wind swirling around Heaton Sports Ground, Dave Treglown was entirely unfazed by a touchline conversion and added the extras on what was to be a fruitful day for the fly half. With ten minutes gone, Durham were monopolising possession, as Newcastle struggled to hold their ground in every scrum. After a period of good phases, the excellent Treglown spotted a gap between the Newcastle back line and full back Lewis Crosbie, who was deputising for the injured Jonny Patterson. His chip was judged to perfection, and was picked up at speed by Durham full back Simon Hammersley, who swerved past the helpless Crosbie to crash over. There was some doubt as to whether Hammersley properly grounded the ball, however it’s unlikely it would have altered the final outcome of the game, and Treglown easily slotted the conver-
The Courier
bucssport.47
Monday 11 February 2013
Seconds scrap to top of table Men’s Rugby Union Newcastle 2nds
19
Sheffield 2nds
7
By Patrick Castleden at Heaton Sports Ground Newcastle 2nd XV continued their unbeaten season and reasserted their place at the top of BUCS Northern 2B with a 19-7 victory over Sheffield Uni 2’s. In boggy conditions at the Medicals Ground at Heaton, Newcastle started strong, playing with the wind against the Yorkshire side. Newcastle were dominant and put pressure on Sheffield through kicking for territory. The pressure showed off as Alex Potts broke the Sheffield line and offloaded to Brad Wade who went under the posts in what proved to be a good day for the centre combination. The try was converted from straight underneath the posts. Newcastle continued to pile the pressure on and expose the shaky Sheffield defence as again, Brad Wade scored from broken play which was again converted by Patrick Castleden. Newcastle took their foot off the gas and started to concede several penalties which put the pressure on themselves territorially. Sheffield had a good driving line out but the Newcastle defence was strong and held out a prolonged period in their own twenty-two but never managed to truly relieve the pressure as they kept giving away penalties at the break down. Sheffield exploited their big pack around the fringes but their backs caused no trouble to the Newcastle defence as they never managed to put points on the board despite their territorial pressure.
Eventually just before the break, the home team began to build some phases. With the wind in their favour, Rob McGowen kicked to the corners well. With the interval looming, Newcastle launched one last attack from an attacking five metre scrum. Number Eight, Eddy O’Hare picked at the base before taking the ball into contact just short of the visitors line, where he injured his arm. This injury was severe enough to cause the half time to be called early and prevent Newcastle from getting over the line frustratingly. With a prolonged half time due to the injury, both teams had to stay focused and warm in the cold, wet and windy conditions as the first score could have been pivotal to the result. As the sleet began to fall, Newcastle made an unforced error from the kick off as the ball was dropped, handing the initiative to Sheffield with a scrum. Newcastle came under the pump for long periods in the second half as they could not hold on to the ball for long periods. As the wind was in Sheffield’s favour they began to kick the corners
showed their promotion credentials as a score at this point would have brought Sheffield into a strong position with the elements in their favour. In a great twist to the game though Newcastle hit the Yorkshire side with a fatal blow, a length of the pitch try. Brad Wade collected the ball deep in the Newcastle twenty-two following yet another Sheffield chip through. He ran across the pitch before being tackled but managed to offload to Justin Lear who began to weave his way through defenders in a majestic run, sidestepping and handing off several defenders as he managed to dot the ball down for a crucial try which killed the game off for the Sheffield side with scores at 19-7 with under ten minutes to go. From this point Newcastle were always in control as there was little threat to their line after this. The final whistle sounded in what was a physical, mistake riddled game with the home team retaining their undefeated record this season. This was a key win for the Newcastle team to back up their defeat of promo-
for territory. Not long into the half Sheffield found themselves with an attacking five metre line out. They collected a ball and drove it over for their first score of the game which was converted leaving the scores at 14-7. In this mistake stricken half for Newcastle, they came under pressure again in their own twenty-two as they were pinned back by the Sheffield kicking game. The Newcastle defence stood strong as they were defending their own line for a sustained five minute period and wouldn’t let the Sheffield team cross the line. In a key part of the game, it
tion rivals Durham, to assert themselves as the front runners for promotion. The Newcastle 2nd XV are in action in their next game in what is sure to be a tightly contested match against their own 3rd XV as people fight for places higher up in the club and have bragging rights over fellow club members. The Newcastle 2nd XV target a perfect season in being undefeated, winning both the league and the cup. Despite this game not being their best they showed they were a class above many of the other teams in their league.
a penalty quickly, chipping into space and rumbling into the unsuspecting Durham fullback who had collected the kick. The ball was spilt back to the Newcastle side, before Beckett sped down the blindside to cross over for the Royals’ first score of the game.
the pass that the move warranted, as his decision making was second to none the entire afternoon. Cook however always chose to use his mammoth left boot, giving very few passes to the centres. On this occasion, as opposed to slipping Ioan Davies over for the try, he bizarrely opted for a chip forward, allowing Durham to clear. Davies, understandably, was furious. The Royals’ however had their tails up, and after Beckett thought he had crossed for his second try of the day to be ruled for offside, the advantage gave the Royals another bite of the cherry. Blindside flanker Harry Bate, who had made yards all day, took the penalty quickly and barreled over the line, with Cook adding the extras. Newcastle can undoubtedly take heart from scoring twelve unanswered points against the best side in the country, and can hope to make some of their other games in hand count.
“Despite this game not being their best they showed they were a class above many of the other teams in the league ”
show class to defeat valiant Toon sion. It went from bad to worse for the Royals as club captain Jonny Neville was stretchered off, The only bright spot of the first half came when Jo Beckett left his opposing wing for dead. However he was to eventually run out of room, with no support on hand to aid his breakaway. Mistakes continued to dog Newcastle’s play, with fly half Jack Cook kicking a restart from the 22m line out on the full. From the ensuing scrum, Durham forced Newcastle into conceding a penalty. Treglown made no mistake, taking the score up to 17-0. Five minutes later Durham increased their score further as, after a period of sustained pressure, giant lock Sean Robinson crossed over. The metronomic like Treglown converted once more, taking the score up to 24-0. Just as Newcastle were beginning to enjoy some sustained pressure on the Durham defence before half time, the
ball was spilt and hooker Payne showed remarkable speed to eat up sixty metres before crossing the whitewash. Treglown surprisingly missed the conversion as the Royals went in at the break 29-0 down. For the ten minutes that preceded half-time, the Royals must have thought they were cursed. A blizzard that drove away a vast majority of the spectators appeared to hit Newcastle the worst. An appalling lapse in concentration led to Durham taking a line out quickly and ambling to the line to cross for a try before a Newcastle player had moved. Mercifully, Treglown missed the conversion. Four minutes later, one of Newcastle’s most experienced players, scrum half Jonny Burn, inexplicably blocked Hammersley when jumping to catch his chip. Consequently, he could have no complaints when he was sinbinned. It was a foolish decision, especially
when Hammersley was nowhere near the try line, and left the rest of the Royals with their backs to the wall. This however seemed to spur Newcastle on, and captain Beckett, who was the Royals’ best player, broke fifty metres down the left and nearly slipped the ball
“Newcastle can undoubtedly take heart from scoring twelve unanswered points against the best side in the country” to Number 8 Nic Pass who just knocked on. Despite some resilience, the fourteen Geordies could not stop Durham from scoring again, taking their lead to 41-0. Once Burn reentered the fray Newcastle began to have their best spell of the game, with the excellent openside Pete Alston spotting space and taking
Within a few minutes, Newcastle nearly had a second try. From a ruck just inside the Durham twenty-two the ball was moved from right to left, and fly half Cook sold his man with a beautiful dummy. Through one on one with the full back, the difference in class between the two sides first receivers showed. Treglown would have doubtless made
Sport
www.thecourieronline.co.uk Monday 11 February 2013 Issue 1264 Free
thecourieronline.co.uk/sport
Sports Editors: Ralph Blackburn, Nick Gabriel and Lucy Williams Online Sports Editors: Freddie Caldwell and Jack Gelsthorpe courier.sport@ncl.ac.uk | @Courier_Sport
Kingston Park to be new venue for Stan Calvert’s showcase rugby fixture Photography: Getty Images
GIS to lose Stan Calvert •
Gateshead International Stadium pitch unplayable
By Freddie Caldwell Onlne Sports Editor
T
his year’s troubled Stan Calvert competition suffered another blow this week with the announcement that the showcase rugby event cannot be held at the usual venue of Gateshead International Stadium. The reason for this decision is that it cannot be guaranteed that the pitch will be playable; a statement from Gateshead Council read: “We have experienced unprecedented rainfall during the last six months of 2012, and with the recent thawing snow the newly laid turf is retaining water which is creating a very wet pitch that is easily prone to damage”. This problem has already affected National Conference side Gateshead Football Club who have not played at the stadium this year, and it is uncertain when the pitch will be available for use
•
Rugby to be relocated to Kingston Park
•
Gateshead lost as central hub
again; the statement continued: “It is expected that drainage will improve as we continue to work on the pitch but we have taken this precautionary measure to allow the organising committee sufficient time to make alternative arrangements.” This poses a major problem for
and is now likely to take place in front of a largely empty stadium. It now seems a high possibility that the majority of sports will be moved away from Gateshead, and so it will cease to be a central hub for the competition this year. However, the rugby union will re-
weather dependent with Druids Park a potential substitute if the pitch condition is not sufficient to host two games back-to-back. Whilst this option does mean that there is still a showcase event to end the day at an impressive stadium, it is far from perfect because there is a
this year’s Stan Calvert competition because Gateshead has always been the central point for the day, a large part of which is the showcase rugby union event in the evening. This has knock-on effects for other events such as the rugby league, which usually takes place at the same venue before the union game. Another sport that will be directly affected is the athletics that takes place during the breaks between the rugby matches
main as the showcase event and will be moved to Kingston Park, the stadium of the Newcastle Falcons rugby team. It has been used in the past for the ‘Clash of the Titans’ rugby match, another rugby union fixture played earlier in the season between Newcastle and Northumbria. There is also the likelihood that the rugby league will be played at the same venue earlier in the day, although this is
maximum of two matches that can be played at the venue. In previous years, Gateshead has hosted a large number of sports; this is beneficial as it allows many sports teams to converge in the evening at the rugby. With sports now spread all around Newcastle, it is questionable how many clubs will bother making the trip to Kingston Park as it is out of town and consequently requires a trip on the
Fraser Kennedy: the decision is “unavoidable and understandable”
metro to reach it. The 2013 edition of Stan Calvert has already run into trouble after Northumbria proposed major changes to the competition which included moving events away from Gateshead. Performance Sport Manager Fraser Kennedy has been fighting to keep events at GIS; he is keen to emphasize the importance of a neutral venue that can host a variety of events. Speaking to The Courier, he announced that he is “very disappointed but has nothing but respect for the decision; it is unavoidable and understandable and I look forward to working with Gateshead Council on the event next year”. This year marks the 20th anniversary of the Stan Calvert competition and a good relationship has been built up with Gateshead Council over that time. It would be disappointing if that relationship were to be sacrificed due to this unfortunate event. continued on page 41