www.thecourieronline.co.uk Monday 27 October 2014 Issue 1297 Free
HALLOWEEN IS HERE
The Independent Voice of Newcastle Students
SHEARER CLASS Toon legend on his St. James’
Est 1948
WIN FREE STUFF
We’ve got everything you need to make the most of it p.12-33 Park heroes p.36
Grab tickets to WHQ’s legendary Halloween night p.29
Figures show rise in requests for help from stressed students By Charlie Dearnley News Editor
In the academic year 2013/14 the Student Advice Centre received 93 more cases than in the academic year 2012/13, with the majority of these cases both years constituted of cases related to housing. Out of the 582 cases in 2012/13, 209 were related to housing. These cases vary between students living in University halls of residence, and those living in private housing in the city, both postgraduates and undergraduates. Helping with deposit issues and disputes with landlords the team is incredibly qualified to provide advice, and is well experienced in analysing housing contracts. The 209 cases involving housing in 2012/13 increased to 293 cases in 2013/14, making up roughly 31% of all 675 cases. Olivia Jeffery, the Union’s Welfare Officer said, “Issues relating to housing are a big concern, not only locally but nationally. A lot of students quite often don’t feel confident on their rights as tenants and hold many concerns with renting in the private sector. “A lot of stu- This is why I have decided dents quite to produce a often don’t newsIHHO FRQÀ GHQW housing paper suppleon their rights ment which will go through as tenants” all these different issues.” This is part of a campaign titled ‘Don’t Rush In’, beginning in the first week of
November. The second largest category of cases that SAC dealt with in the past two years were Academic related enquiries, with 172 cases in 2012/13 and 202 cases in 2013/14, again displaying a substantial rise. The third major category that occupied a vast number of cases involved Student Finance. The numbers of cases in this category also rose, from 119 to 133 across the two The 209 years. cases involv- academic 2nd year Meing housing dia, Communicain 2012/13 tion and Cultural increased to Studies student Shepherd 293 cases in Jamie approached SAC 2013/14 with concerns over student finance when moving universities after two years at Leeds. His student finance wouldn’t cover the entirety of his course and he found himself forced to pay £9000 up front. He said: “SAC guided me through acquiring a maintenance loan and saved my university career.” Many other categories occupied a very small number of cases, and mental health only held one case both years. Cases concerning money guidance, welfare benefits, employment and family all decreased over the two years. The Student Advice Centre offers support for a range of differing cases, and is an excellent service for students seeking help in areas where they require experienced advice and guidance.
Academic 29.5% of all cases 2012/13, 29.9% 2013/14 Counselling and Psychotherapy 0.2% 12/13, n/a 13/14 Education 0.3% 12/13, n/a 13/14 Family 0.5% 12/13, 0.3% 13/14 Housing 35.9% 12/13, 43.4% 13/14 Miscellaneous 1% 12/13, n/a 13/14 Personal Injury 0.3% 12/13, n/a 13/14 Student Finance 0.2% 12/13, n/a 13/14 Welfare Benefits 1.4% 12/13, 0.1% 13/14
If you go down to the Dene today... Halloween photoshoot, p.18
Consumer/General Contract 2.6% 12/13, 2.5% 13/14 Debt 0.3% 12/13, n/a 13/14 Employment 1.9% 12/13, 0.3% 13/14 General 0.5% 12/13, 0.6% 13/14 Mental Health 0.2% 12/13, 0.1% 13/14 Money Guidance 0.3% 12/13, 0.1% 13/14 Public Law 1.4% 12/13, 1.9% 13/14 Student Issues 2.9% 12/13, 0.7% 13/14 SAC case categories: 2012/13 Total: 582
SAC case categories: 2013/14 Total: 675
2
News
Monday 27 October 2014
News Editors: Charlie Dearnley, Antonia Velikova and Kate Dewey Online News Editor: Mark Sleightholm courier.news@ncl.ac.uk | @TheCourier_News
thecourieronline.co.uk/news
Volunteers could be turfed out of their allotment
5 7
- Jimi Hendrix
COMMENT
9 CULTURE
Bottle it up
A man from China, whose identity has not been revealed, has got a bottle lodged in his anus. The 60-year-old complained about constipation after trying to stimulate himself. But having stuffed the object too far inside, he was unable to remove it.
ix
SCAN’T BELIEVE IT
“Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.”
Rehearsals for annual production get underway
e h t
Science
m
MUSICAL MEDICS
Wise words:
In
NEWS
The Courier
Finance
NUS WRONG OVER ISIS Commander-in-cheap
Refusing to condemn ISIS is misguided, says Adam Thompson
14 20 28
Despite receiving an annual salary of $400,000 (£250,000), Barack Obama revealed in a recent speech that his credit card was declined in a New York City restaurant. No gentlemanly date-night etiquette here, I’m afraid – Michelle saved her husband from a shift in the kitchen doing the dishes and graciously footed the bill.
CBA WITH HALLOWEEN No time to get ready? No problem
Marc Nozell
CLUB CULTURE
The hottest sounds, maddest vibes and biggest parties
Ed Howe and Ben Leach
Family
Flippin’ amazing The pancake art of an American dad has gone viral online. Nathan, from Washington, began entertaining his children while living on a Pacific Island, but carried it on upon arrival in the US. Squirting the mixture into the pan in stages, the blobs of batter come to life when tossed over revealing life-like faces. He does Star Wars characters, as well as monkeys and musical instruments.
NUSU, King’s Walk, Newcastle upon Tyne, NE1 8QB. Tel: 0191 239 3940
The Courier is a weekly newspaper produced by students, for students. It’s never too late to get involved in the paper, whether you’re a writer, illustrator or photographer. Email editor. union@ncl.ac.uk for more information.
Lifestyle
Tech International
Named and shamed
ROCKY HORROR
Nail that Riff Raff look with the beauty section
@WauWau0977
China’s English-speaking news channel, CCTV news, has issued advice on its website to Chinese businesspeople who may wish to give themselves an English name in order to gain an upper hand in dealing with the West. To avoid embarrassment, names to be steered clear of include “non-names” such as Dragon, Fish and Lawyer, food-related names such as Candy, Lolly and Sugar (these are “suggestive” or, put more bluntly, “‘stripper’ names”) and, for reasons that barely need an explanation, Creamy, Pussy and Dong. The website leaves its strongest advice for last: “avoid anything like ‘Bunny Wang’ at all times.” hrjust
Where’ve you bin?
iHome 6
The owner of a three-bedroom house in the bankrupt city of Detroit is willing to exchange his property for an iPhone 6. The estate agent said the owner ideally wants the “iPhone 6 Plus version, but… he’s willing to negotiate.” The exchange would not be the first of its kind by any means. In 2005 and 2006, Canadian blogger, Kyle Macdonald, completed fourteen trades within a year, starting with a single red paperclip and bartering his way to a house in Kipling, Saskatchewan, Canada.
Performance
From Russia with lobe
A man who has previously nailed his testicles to the ground has now sliced off his own ear. Peter Pavlenskiy, from Russia, stripped off naked in a busy Moscow street before revealing a razorsharp kitchen knife and began hacking at his ear lobe. In 2012, he protested against the arrest of Pussy Riot by nailing his testicles to the ground AND sewing up his own lips. He was protesting against the forced psychiatric treatment of dissidents. Covered in blood, he was removed from the roof by police and taken to a Moscow hospital. Doctors thought he might also have contracted pneumonia his lawyer, Dmitry Dinze, said last Monday.
Editor Tom Nicholson News Editors Charlie Dearnley, Antonia Velikova, Kate Dewey and Mark Sleightholm Comment Editors Victoria Armstrong, Matt Corden and Ruth Davis Culture Editor Kate Bennett Lifestyle Editors Tom Tibble, Annie Lord, Jack Dempsey and Holly Suttle Fashion Editors Amy O’Rourke, Hannah Fitton and Hannah Goldstein Beauty Editors Charlotte Davies, Charlotte Maxwell and Kathy Davidson Arts Editors Becka Crawshaw, Lucy Chenery and Jess Harman Film Editors David Leighton, Rosie Bellini and Lucas Fothergill Music Editors Jamie Shepherd, Dominique Daly and Chris Addison TV Editor Helen Daly, Ellie Mclaren and Rebecca Dooley Gaming Editors Sophie Baines and Ben Tyrer Science Editors Penny Polson, Laura Staniforth and Jack Marley Sports Editors Jonty Mawer, Peter Georgiev, Huezin Lim and Josh Nicholson
A video of a man claiming to live in a central Manchester bin has gone viral. The fleeting footage shows the man sucking on a cigarette peering through the entry of the bin, talking in such a broad accent that local Mancunian media couldn’t even decipher it. The man, known as Dave, doesn’t actually live in a bin, but said he climbed into it “for a laugh”.
Education
999 - Homework
Police in Sweden have helped a schoolboy with his homework. An 11-year old from Stockholm rang the police after hearing a thud and being convinced that somebody was trying to enter the house. When the police arrived, they found that the boy had been left alone in the house and after trying to ring his Mum with no answer they stayed around with him and helped him with his maths homework until his parents came home.
Kdhenrick
The Courier is printed by: Print and Digital Associates, Fernleigh House, 10 Uttoxeter Road, Derby, Derbyshire, United Kingdom, DE3 0DA. Established in 1948, The Courier is the fully independent student newspaper of the Students’ Union at Newcastle University. The Courier is published weekly during term time, and is free of charge. The design, text, photographs and graphics are copyright of The Courier and its individual contributors. No parts of this newspaper may be reproduced without the prior permission of the Editor. Any views expressed in this newspaper’s comment pieces are those of the individual writing, and not of The Courier, the Students’ Union or Newcastle University.
The Courier
news.3
Monday 27 October 2014
Dr Shoelittle: PhD student goes barefoot for four months for ME With the sun gradually rising just above and as cold winds rush around the city of Newcastle, Zoltan Derzsi is treading the streets barefoot. His shoes haven’t been stolen, they aren’t lost; he simply left them at home. The Hungarian born PhD student at Newcastle University’s Institute of Neuroscience willingly abandoned his shoes in June 2014 and hasn’t looked back since. He has named himself the ‘Barefoot Scientist’ and is raising awareness for the controversial disease, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (also known as Myalgic Encephalomyetis (ME). In addition he hopes to raise money for two ME charities: ME North East which provides support for local patients from the Scottish Borders to North Yorkshire, including North-Cumbria, and ME Research UK, a national charity which funds research into causes and treatment. The NHS states that ME is a serious condition that affects all ages and can
when all other causes of the symptoms are ruled out. In fact it is such a contentious disease that not all scientists agree it exists. Although the charity ME North-East estimates that there are 12,000 ME patients in the North East alone. Though it continues to be stigmatised as a middle-class disease that people essentially fake. One of Zoltan’s contact cards, that he hands out to those interested in his campaign, reads: “There is no treatment available, they don’t know what causes it, and once you get it, it will cripple you for years!” This statement reflects the emotion and anger that Zoltan felt in reaction to Sophie’s case. Rather than continuing to feel frustrated and powerless and walk away from the problem, he chose to use his feet to help instead. One of the symptoms of ME is somatosensory hypersensitivity meaning that some patients feel pain when there is physical contact with the skin. Zoltan’s Barefoot Scientist blog explains why, as a result, he has chosen to do away with all footwear: “The soles of your feet take
cause long-term illness and disability. There is no cure but some of the treatments include cognitive behavioural therapy and medication to control symptoms such as pain, nausea and sleeping problems. Various theories have been suggested as to the causes, including: a viral infection, problems with the immune system, an imbalance of hormones, and psychiatric problems, such as stress and emotional trauma. However, there is no consensus and more research is needed to confirm exactly what causes the problem. It is this continued research that Zoltan Derzsi is trying to fund. His frustration with the lack of knowledge on the underlying causes of ME stems from observing the treatment of his friend’s daughter who has a severe case of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (named Sophie on Zoltan’s blog) and was hospitalised for two months as a result. Her symptoms were simply treated with painkillers. Zoltan said: “When I saw how helpless medical staff were in treating my friend I decided I had to do something to raise awareness of this terrible disease.” As the underlying causes of ME are not known, there is a problem with the disease’s diagnosis. It is only recognised
up to 10-15% of your global sensory input… I wore shoes all my life. Therefore my feet are going to be hypersensitive, so walking on gravel or rough pavement will be similar to what Sophie felt for years.” Following months of research (the Barefoot Scientist blog has a section on current academic research into CFS/ ME) and a risk assessment he embarked upon his barefooted journey. The risk assessment has resulted in a set of exclusion criteria which mean that he will wear shoes in situations where Health and Safety demands it. For example when using hazardous chemicals in the lab. Zoltan sensibly admitted: “I want to keep both my job and my feet.” Has also had to sign a declaration for the Tyne and Wear metro stating that he will not take legal action if injured during travel, as he is travelling barefoot at his own risk in aid of charity. He has had a few injuries already and is quick to admit the dangers of ‘barefooting’. A stranger’s lost ear piercing embedded itself in his foot and he has had a haematoma on his big toe from a bad bash. When asked if he had ever come close to consider quitting he firmly replied: “never.” According to Zoltan, “barefooting is addictive.”
By Alix Pickles
Surprisingly, he has taken his new barefooted life in his stride and is also insistent that it has certain health benefits. It prevents conditions such as athletes’ foot and ingrown toenails. He also insists that barefooting uses muscles that otherwise do not develop and as a result his feet have become stronger. Zoltan said his feet have grown wider from the muscle development and his shoes “don’t fit anymore”. Zoltan’s intention is to create discussion about ME with his campaign by “turning heads” and “raising eyebrows.” In general he has had a largely positive response: “People are supportive, especially when they find out what I’m do-
ing this for.” He keeps a light-hearted list on his blog of places he has visited and whether they are ‘barefoot friendly’ or not. Though he has found that often people don’t even notice his lack of footwear. The intention of the campaign is not to aggravate people in public. Zoltan dresses smartly and wears a jacket with ‘Barefoot for Charity’ emblazoned across the back and a QR code. This way people do not even have to talk to him but in Zoltan’s opinion if it gets people searching him and reading more about ME, even having a conversation about it with their friends, then he has done what he set out to do. In addition he
“When asked if he had ever come close to consider quitting he firmly replied: ‘never.’”
Images: Zoltan Derzsi
claims that many people have accepted leaflets and donated money as a result. Zoltan measures the success of his campaign not just in the £500 he has raised so far but also in the positive responses he has had on Twitter and Facebook. He has had an international response and contact from a lot of people who have or know people suffering from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. The campaign is most likely set to end next month and Zoltan will once more lace up his feet in shoes. However, he has definitely put his best foot- or rather feet- forward in name of making a change for those with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.
4.news
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Musical medics swap surgery for singing By Antonia Velikova News Editor
HELP ME, DR. BEAT: The poster for Anything Goes. Poster: Matt Byrne
Images: Aidan Flatt
Musical Medics are putting their dancing shoes on and going onstage for charity. The medical students have been preparing their staging of worldwide hit musical Anything Goes since April and after many perils they will finally perform it this week. The musical will be “We performed in the Jubilee theatre at St. fought Hospital in for every Nicholas “The hospital penny.” Gosforth. management have all been extremely charitable about providing us with a venue,” society president Alex Peterson said. “They also offered to help us with the tech, which was extremely kind of them.” All proceedings from ticket sale will be donated to the Changing Lives charity. Changing Lives provides specialist support for thousands of vulnerable people and their families. They offer help to people struggling with homelessness and addictions, and provide specialist support services to women and families. The performance has been in the works for a while now and is completely self-funded, Alex and director Harry Putnam said. “The band, the chorus, the actors, the producing team – most of us are 4th year medical students,” Alex said. “It was a daunting challenge for us, since we don’t have any experience whatsoever, but it has also been great fun.” “Apart from some very minor experience, this is the first time I’ve actually directed something this big,” Harry
confessed. “But it’s fun, it’s really fun. Everyone’s already friends and still so many people are involved that you can always meet someone new. Besides, the workload is split between 5 other assistant directors, and we have the society Exec acting as the production team. Everyone’s working together and it’s really good fun.” One of the society’s major challenges was to fund the production all by themselves. “We fought for every penny,” Alex Peterson said. “The rights to Anything Goes are quite costly – although they’re nothing compared to Grease, or Les Miserables – and we had other expenses to cover as well. Fortunately, we got some grants from the union, and our cast members were all extremely dedicated and helped us with all the fundraising. We funded it mostly with membership fees, bake sales, and an Open Mic night we organised, which was a huge success.” The Musical Medics are probably one of the most interestingly fascinating societies that we have to date – surely many people believe that medics hardly ever have any time off their studies? “It’s not far from the truth,” Alex said with a smile. “We are quite busy, however the society offers us a great chance to relax and have a bit of fun with our friends.” With their extreme dedication and passion, the Musical Medics will definitely provide high-class entertainment – for a good cause, too. Anything Goes will be performed on Thursday and Friday, 30 and 31 October, as well as Saturday, 1 November. Tickets are sold around the Students’ Union and will be available on the door as well.
Fossil Free forum to talk future energy
Fossil Free aims for complete fossil fuel divestment. Image: Petr Štefek traditional medicine, the destruction By Antonia Velikova and disappearance of sacred sites, such News Editor as cemeteries, rivers, lakes and springs On Tuesday 28 October at 7pm the Fos- of living and pure water,” said Rogelio sil Free Newcastle group will host a talk Ustate. in the Fine Art lecture theatre of NewPius Ginting, another speaker, is from castle University. The event will bring Friends of the Earth in Indonesia, where together individuals from different BHP Biliton is planning a series of mascommunities impacted by the damage sive opencast coal mines in the rainforfossil fuels cause to the environment. ests of Central Kalimantan. Many beSpeakers from Colombia and Indo- lieve that this would destroy one of the nesia will present their concerns and very last pure rainforests in the territory criticisms regarding the climate and the of Borneo, pollute local water sources, social impact of fossil fuels in different and endanger the livelihood of many parts of the world. Indigenous people in the area. Rogelio Ustate and Francisco Tovar, “Newcastle’s investments in fossil fuel who will be taking part in the talk, have companies are not only linking it to the come from La Guajira in Colombia. In destruction of a safe and stable climate, La Guajira, the existence of the Cerre- they’re also linking it to the human jón coal mine has caused disturbances rights abuses and ecosystem destrucwithin many farming communities in tion in many other parts of the world. the area. Cerrejón is partly owned by It’s time for the University to divest BHP Billiton. from these dirty and destructive invest“BHP Billiton’s coal mining in Co- ments,” said Toby Munnion, a student at lombia has led to the destruction of Newcastle University and a member of the social fabric, the loss of ancestral or Fossil Free Newcastle.
The Courier
news.5
Monday 27 October 2014
SCAN faces eviction from allotments By Jack Parker
SCAN’s Student Eats Community Allotment could be faced with the prospect of relocating due to issues with vandalism and their landlords. The allotment, located at Nuns Moor Park, is part of the Student Community Action Newcastle (SCAN) volunteering charity based within NUSU. Since opening in October 2012 400 students “Earlier around have been involved with in the the allotment so far, the year, the produce of which is sold group’s in the Students’ Union. allows students and SORW ZDV Itmembers the local broken community,ofyoung and into” old, to pursue a new hobby whilst also promoting community integration and enjoyment of the outdoors. However, there are rumours suggesting that the landlords, the Freemen of Newcastle, may not renew the allotment associations’ lease on the land. Whilst this currently cannot be proven, tensions have been growing over the past 18 months between the allotment association and former tenants who have been evicted. SCAN are keen to stress that they are not involved in the dispute and that they “have always been very friendly with the other plot holders, sharing tools and equipment, giving away seeds and offering to help clear abandoned plots so that new tenants can be found quickly.” The dispute is affecting SCAN re-
gardless: earlier in the year the group’s quarter-acre plot was broken into. The intruders slashed the skins of the polytunnels over 50 times, causing £1500 worth of damage. SCAN are not alone in having their plots spoiled. Over the last year and a half, Nuns Moor’s allotment committee members have seen their greenhouses smashed, crops ruined, and in some cases have even been physically attacked. Bob Milan, CEO of SCAN, also reports: “The water supply to the whole site has also been damaged on three separate occasions, effectively cutting off the water supply to every single plot at a time when the water is needed most. The atmosphere on the site is not great with several of the tenants choosing to give up their plots. One man has had his plot almost 40 years and the decision to give it up was clearly not an easy one.” SCAN have overseen the transformation of an overgrown plot into a working allotment, complete with sheds, polytunnels, beehives and even a pizza oven, and despite the issues, have been invited to take on another plot in the allotments. Milan stresses the importance of the allotments: “The aim of the allotment project is to promote a deeper understanding of sustainable food sourcing, growth, distribution and consumption across the student population.” Despite the uncertainty, Milan said: “We are exploring several avenues of expansion and contingency back up plans.”
SCAN YOU DIG IT? The current SCAN allotments at Nuns Moor Park Image: SCAN
Lecturer on to grab the Grierson By Kate Dewey News Editor
),/0(' 0F'RQDOG À OPV 'DUSDQ DQG 6DL .ULVKQD ZLWK WKH %OLQG &KHVV FKDPSLRQ Image: Algorithms, Akam Puram
A documentary produced by Dr. Ian McDonald, a senior film lecturer at the University, has been nominated in the Best Newcomer Documentary category of the Grierson film awards. The film, titled Algorithms, follows the journey of three boys, aged between 12 and 16, in India who compete in Blind Chess tournaments. It is the first feature documentary that McDonald has produced and the “The main first one to ever GLIÀ FXOW\ ZDV be produced raising the covering Blind À QDQFH... Chess. McDonWe even ald stated that remortgaged he was inspired after reading an RXU Á DW article in an Into raise dian newspaper funds.” about the game. The documentary was filmed in different parts of India over a three year period. McDonald travelled with the three players and an adult Blind Chess champion to competitions across India, Sweden, Serbia and Greece. He also filmed them at home where they revealed the struggles they face due to being blind, and their hopes for the future. McDonald spoke to The Courier about his protagonists: “It has been really special to see them develop from teenagers into young men over the course of the three years. They are not only talented chess players but all are brilliant in academics too. I am still in contact with them and I can tell you that they will all go on to do amazing things in life.” McDonald told The Courier that the film took a total of five years to make with a year spent researching, three
years filming, and over a year and a half spent editing. He also spoke of the difficulties faced when making the film: “The main difficulty was raising the finance. “Despite our best efforts we [were] unable to secure funding for this “The project from commissioners documentary is set to hit and funding PDMRU 8. bodies before or even durscreens ing the shoot, EHWZHHQ so Geetha, the the 8th and producer, had 14th of to be very inNovember.” ventive with credit cards! “We even remortgaged our flat to raise funds. When we finished shooting, we managed to secure some funding through Kickstarter and FIDE (the world chess federation) for postproduction. And more recently we had received backing from Newcastle University and TCS (Tata Consultancy Services) to help us release the film in cinemas in the US and UK.” The film, which has just been submitted for the Oscar Academy Awards, has already received global recognition. Over the past two years the film has won awards such as the Best Film Trophy at Film South Asia and the Best Foreign Documentary at the LA Femme Film Festival. Algorithms was released in America last week. The documentary is set to hit major UK screens between the 8th and 14th of November, with an aim to be shown in Newcastle later that month. The Grierson awards take place on 3 November.
6.news
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
RiseUp boosts business ventures By Ashley Williams
BRIGHT FUTURES: RiseUp provides training and resources for budding entrepreneurs. Image: Careers Service.
Students looking for help with developing their ideas don’t have to look far. Newcastle University’s RiseUp programme by the Careers Service offers students and graduates the tools they need to follow their passion and explore their entrepreneurial side. The RiseUp community provides “Nearly one training, resources thousand and opportunities students are for those wanting to involved with learn enterprising or eventually the RiseUp skills start businesses. programme” Students are welcome to drop in to The Elevator in the Careers Service to chat with RiseUp Interns about their ideas. Assistant Director Gareth Trainer said the RiseUp team aims to help students realise that they can make things happen themselves. Trainer said: “You quite often might hear yourself saying, ‘If only there were something that did this, I wouldn’t have that problem.’ Well you can actually do something about that.” One of RiseUp’s newest features is the Skills Series – four master classes per semester designed to give entrepreneurs insight into steps needed to develop a profitable business. Students and graduates can learn about finance, digital marketing, social
media, and business models. This semester’s first session is 30th October. Nearly one thousand students are involved with the RiseUp programme so far this year, but not all budding entrepreneurs may be aware of its existence. Chris Dawson, a Town Planning graduate, founded his company “One Utility Bill” with the help of RiseUp’s advisors. The student utilities management service plans to launch next month – but the founder said he wasn’t aware of RiseUp until his third year of university. “I wish that when I found out about RiseUp and everything that they do for you, that I had known about it earlier, and that I’d gone in earlier,” Chris said. “Because there’s a lot of support there.” Chris and five other recent graduates are part of the Founderships programme. Foundership offers graduate entrepreneurs advice, support, training, workspace, and a £10,000 bursary to help get businesses off the ground. All funds provided by RiseUp to start projects are grants, which might appeal to students who don’t want to risk going into debt to achieve their goals. “Everything helps,” Chris confirmed. Students may not have their own business idea just yet, which is why the RiseUp service is available to Newcastle University graduates for life. “We don’t want to force you to go into business now,” Trainer said. “The timing has to be right for you and your business.”
The Courier
news.7
Monday 27 October 2014
No longer jammed: Jam Jar one year on By Mark Sleightholm Online News Editor Just over a year after opening its doors Jam Jar has become an established haunt of Jesmond’s student population. The brainchild of three Northumbria graduates, Josh Rose, Jonathan Edwards and Rob Clarkson, Jam Jar aimed to bring high quality comfort food to Osbourne Road. One year on, a string of positive reviews is testament to their success. The graduates had lived in Jesmond during their time at Northumbria “Plans for University, and so opening a new knew their target restaurant in market well. They recognised that London” Jesmond was lacking an establishment that served simple but well-loved dishes such as fish and chips or bangers and mash in a friendly and relaxed environment. “There was just a lot of sports bars with TVs selling Carling for £2,” said Rose. “We thought we’d try and create somewhere with a good vibe.” They claim on their website to be “unpretentious and wholesome”, and their cocktails in jam jars are just one of many quirks that set Jam Jar apart from other establishments. The key to this laidback atmosphere is the youth of Jam Jar’s management. As recent graduates the team have a good idea of what Jesmond-ites consider to be a: “good vibe”. Since Jam Jar’s opening last September, Jesmond has seen a number of new
businesses opening, and the proposed Acorn Road development adds to a feeling of rejuvenation, that Jam Jar is keen to be a part of. It is said that the first twelve months are the hardest for any business, and Rose admitted that they had experienced a steep learning curve. At Jam Jar they struggled initially with the financial side of things, since they had no previous experience of running a business. Rose’s advice for would-be restaurateurs among Newcastle’s student population is: “Make sure the figures stack up... otherwise it might not work. You can create a really cool place but without the finances, it’s not going to last long. Do your homework!” Such is the success of the young business that the team are now making plans for opening a new restaurant in London. In the meantime they will keep thinking of ways to improve the bar in Jesmond. They have recently started their own quarterly publication, the Jam Jar Times, and new chef Steven Foister has added several American-inspired dishes to the menu. Foister, like the majority of Jam Jar’s ingredients, is locally sourced, hailing from Gateshead. He said: “I love how the core concept is based around a relaxed, cool atmosphere but with a strong gastronomic offering.” While opening a restaurant or bar may not be top of most students’ to-do lists, Jam Jar proves that the ideas of young entrepreneurs can be a success.
JAMMING NOT JARRING: Josh Rose, Manager of Jam Jar. Image: Mark Sleightholm.
Student groups slam “shocking” paper By Antonia Velikova News Editor
CONTROVERSY: The front page of The University Paper. Image: Saffron Kershaw-Mee.
A student-led newspaper sparked controversy last week as debates rose over the suitability of its content. The University Paper’s second issue, posted through letter boxes on 16 October led some student groups to, question the publication’s editorial policies and content control. The paper’s front page splash is split between “Sex, Trebles, and a Whole Lot of Carnage”, which details the alleged sexual exploits unnamed “My neighbours of Freshers’ Crew have little kids members during old enough to the week, and a read. Imagine report about five rapes reported getting this in the city centre through your in recent weeks. door” Newcastle Uni Feminist Society took issue with the positioning of both articles on the page, saying that it devalued the importance of sexual abuse. “The juxtaposition of the headlines on the front page of The University Paper is grossly inappropriate,” said Lucy Morgan, president of FemSoc. “The main headline is a biased view of student life in Newcastle that trivialises the very disturbing reality that rapes and sexual harassment are happening at crisis level in the city. We would expect a fairer representation of students and a greater concern displayed towards a news story that is shocking and potentially triggering.” In response to the article’s allegations regarding the behaviour of crew during Freshers’ Week, Freshers’ Week Organiser Emil Franchi said: “After reading this very misinformed article, all four of us were very saddened that this was the only press that our Freshers’ Crew received. It may well suggest that “the
fresher’s crew were just as bad as the fresher’s” (get your apostrophes correct please), but it fails to note the crew members who walked students to and from their halls safely for five nights, those who sat until almost 3am on the infamous sick benches in town and especially those who walked them to A&E if the situation called for it. Yes, the crew will have had a drink or two when they were officially off duty it but it came in return for the endless work they did every single day and night, with Union and University staff happier than ever with their efforts. If a few stories have been passed on then we really cannot see how this shows over 300 volunteers in a bad light. They were the reason why this year ran so smoothly and we hope they loved every minute.” Since the publication is distributed directly to people’s homes, many residents expressed worry over their children seeing the controversial articles. “My neighbours have little kids, old enough to read,” one Twitter user said. “Imagine getting this through your door!” As the controversy continued, this statement was published on the Newcastle page of The University Paper: “We’re sorry; those two stories should never have appeared on the same page. The frivolous nature of the antics of drunken students and the tone of parts of our coverage detracted from the very serious issue of young women falling prey to sexual predators. Our usual checks and balances failed in this instance and, rest assured, it won’t happen again. We also know what a wonderful city Newcastle is, what wonderful universities it has and, as we did this month, we will also share stories which reflect all three in a more positive light. The University Paper is evolving; in a few months you will see it getting better and better, its coverage expanding, its writing and design improving beyond all measure.”
Monday 27 October 2014
8.nationalstudentnews
The Courier
NEWSTACK
Pussy Riot to visit Cambridge uni Job  Title:  5  x  Sales  Assistants Employer:  Pandora Closing  Date:  30/10/14 Salary:  Competitive  Basic  job  description:  We  are  currently  recruiting  for  5  Sales  Assistants  for  our  Pandora  store  in  the  Metrocentre.  Duties  will  include  assisting  customers  with  the  se- lection  of  products  to  determine  their  needs,  providing  excellent  customer  service  at  all  times  and  answering  queries  and  other  general  store  duties.  (Hours  -  20  Hours  per  week) Person  Requirements:  The  successful  candidates  will  be  experienced  Sales  As- sistants  within  retail,  with  a  high  standard  of  customer  service,  excellent  communication  skills  and  be  able  to  work  as  part  of  a  team. Location:  Gateshead  Job  Title:  Newcastle  Work  Experience  –  3URMHFW 2IÂż FHU  Employer:  Murray  House  Community  Centre Closing  Date:  02/11/14 Salary:  Competitive  £700  Bursary    Basic  job  description:  Murray  House  Community  Recreation  Centre,  provides  valuable  space  for  local  people  and  volun- tary,  community  and  sports  groups  to  use  to  run  their  activities.  Placement  duties  will  include  encouraging  the  centre  to  embrace  online  communication  tools  and  techniques,  acting  as  a  key  contact  for  stakeholders  involved  in  the  project,  assisting  with  mar- keting  communications  initiatives  and  help  undertake  community  engagement  work  and  recruit  volunteers  to  the  centre. Person  Requirements:  The  successful  candidate  must  have  excellent  communica- tion  skills,  strong  planning,  organisation  and  team  working  skills,  the  ability  to  problem  solve  and  be  creative  and  be  able  to  work  unsupervised.  Additionally  they  must  have  knowledge  and  experience  of  communica- tions  tools  and  techniques  including  social  media  and  producing  visual  materials  and  have  project  management  and  governance  awareness  experience. Location:  Newcastle  upon  Tyne   Job  Title:  Telephone  Interviewer Employer:  Populus  Data  Solutions  Closing  Date:  31/12/2014 Salary:  National  Minimum  Wage  +  Bonus  Basic  job  description:  Working  as  part  of  a  team  you  will  be  responsible  for  the  telephone  recruitment  of  respondents  for  Market  Research  interviews  nationwide.  Populus  Data  Solutions  abides  by  the  strict  guidelines  meaning  that  the  interviews  car- ried  out  by  our  telephone  interviewers  are  purely  for  research  purposes  –  there  are  no  sales  or  marketing  involved.  This  role  is  ideal  for  anyone  looking  for  well-Âpaid  and  À H[LEOH ZRUN WKDW Âż WV DURXQG IDPLO\ RU VWXG\ commitments.  Person  Requirements:  Experience  is  preferred  but  not  essential  as  full  training  is  provided.  The  ideal  candidate  must  have  a  SROLWH Ă€ H[LEOH DWWLWXGH FRQÂż GHQW XVLQJ FRP puter  and  software  packages,  quick  thinking  and  the  ability  to  read  from  a  script.  Good  command  of  the  English  language  both  writ- ten  and  verbal  is  essential.   Location:  Newcastle  upon  Tyne  Job  Title:  Gallery  Assistant   Employer:  BALTIC  Centre  for  Contempo- rary  Art Closing  Date:  31/10/2014 Salary:  £6.80  per  hour  Basic  job  description:  The  BALTIC  is  a  major  international  centre  for  contemporary  art.   We  are  looking  for  Gallery  Assistants  who  can  combine  knowledge  of  contempo- rary  art  with  the  skills,  passion  and  enthu- siasm  to  communicate  effectively  with  our  audiences.  Person  Requirements:  You  should  have  excellent  customer  service  skills  gained  through  working  with  the  public  in  a  front- line  service  position  and  knowledge,  under- standing  and  enthusiasm  for  contemporary  art. Location:  Gateshead
Job  Title:  Newcastle  Work  Experience  –  Video  Production  Employer:  Newcastle  University  Closing  Date:  02/11/2014 Salary:  £700  Bursary  Basic  job  description:  The  Rail  Education  Group  is  looking  for  a  Video  Producer  who  will  be  working  alongside  a  second  place- ment  student  to  produce  high  quality  videos  promoting  careers  in  railways  and  the  rail- way  industry  itself.  The  Video  Producer  will  be  involved  in  the  production  of  videos  and  web-Ânews  for  the  ePlatform  with  the  aim  to  attract  and  promote  young  talents  in  the  railway  sector,  the  collection  of  information  about  job  adverts  and  opportunities  within  the  rail  sector  and  additionally  interviews  with  rail  professionals. Person  Requirements:  The  successful  candidate  is  expected  to  have  the  ability  to  SURGXFH Âż OP DQG HGLW YLGHRV XVLQJ VRIW ware  available  on  campus,  a  background  in  MRXUQDOLVP YLGHR RU RQOLQH PHGLD D FRQÂż GHQW ,QWHUQHW XVHU DELOLW\ WR VHDUFK DQG Âż QG information  required  and  the  ability  to  meet  deadlines.  Additionally  you  must  be  highly  VHOI PRWLYDWHG DQG KDYH WKH FRQÂż GHQFH WR work  individually. Location:  Newcastle  University  Campus  Job  Title:  2  x  Domestic  Assistants   Employer:  NHS  Closing  Date:  18/12/2014 Salary:  £14,294  -  £15,013  pro  rata  Basic  job  description:  2  x  Domestic  As- sistants  are  required  to  work  15-Â20  hours  per  week  at  St  Benedict’s  Hospice  in  Sun- derland.  In  this  role  you  will  undertake  all  GRPHVWLF GXWLHV WR SURYLGH DQ HIÂż FLHQW DQG effective  service  to  patients,  visitors  and  staff  to  ensure  high  standards  are  met  and  maintained  to  Health  and  Safety  standards  throughout  the  Trust. Person  Requirements:  You  will  need  Domestic  experience  and  knowledge  ideally  in  the  NHS.  As  the  facility  is  new  you  will  QHHG D YHU\ Ă€ H[LEOH DQG DGDSWLYH DSSURDFK to  change. Location:  Sunderland  Job  Title:  Newcastle  Work  Experience  –  Cognitive  Impairment  Research  Employer:  Newcastle  University  Closing  Date:  09/11/2014 Salary:  £700  Bursary  Basic  job  description:  This  placement  will  provide  the  opportunity  to  work  on  the  early  stages  of  a  systematic  review  of  the  litera- ture  on  general  hospital  care  and  manage- ment  of  older  people  with  cognitive  impair- ment.  You  will  be  required  to  assist  with  the  VLIWLQJ RI SDSHUV ZKLFK KDYH EHHQ LGHQWLÂż HG by  searching  relevant  databases,  identifying  those  which  should  be  included.  This  will  require  applying  a  set  of  criteria  and  decid- LQJ ZKHWKHU HDFK SDSHU Âż WV WKH FULWHULD E\ reviewing  the  title  and  abstract.  You  will  be  working  closely  with  the  research  assistant  (RA)  on  the  study  and  will  have  the  full  support  of  both  the  RA  and  the  Principal  Investigator  (PI). Person  Requirements:  This  is  an  excellent  opportunity  for  an  individual  who  is  me- thodical,  organised  and  has  an  interest  in  general  hospital  care  for  older  people  with  dementia  and/or  delirium  (acute  confusion)  and/or  health  care  for  older  people  more  generally.  Some  knowledge  of  health  care  services  is  required  and  an  understanding  RI PHGLFDO WHUPLQRORJ\ ZRXOG EH EHQHÂż FLDO Location:  Newcastle  University  Campus Â
Members of controversial Russian girl band Pussy Riot Nadya Tolokonnikova and Masha Alekhina, are visiting Cambridge University on November 15. After having served 21 months in jail, the Pussy Riot members were released on December 13 2013. The girls have since performed at the Sochi Winter Olympics, where they were attacked with pepper spray. Commenting on the latest news, Cambridge University Students’ Union Women’s officer Amelia Horgan said: “This is very exciting news, especially for an institution that tends to invite old, white men.� The controversial girl band are famous for releasing an expletive-ridden music video in 2012 lacerating Vladimir Putin. Tolokonnikova and Alekhina were sentenced to 2 years in prison, which revoked widespread protests on a global scale. Amnesty International also notably campaigned for their release.
Birmingham ballots for pay strike University of Birmingham professors at risk of a pension loss of 36% compared to professors at “new� institutions. Professors part of the Universities Superannuation Scheme (USS) scheme are at risk of their pensions being up to 36% worse that associates at ‘new’ universities, under the Teacher Pension Scheme. In response, the University and College Union balloted its members at University of Birmingham and 67 other UK institutes for strike action against the threat of pension cuts. 78 per cent of members who voted expressed support for strike action. The ballot of strike action closed on the 20th October with 45 per cent turnout. Ruth Whittle, the BUCU President, said, ‘A high turnout in the ballot is as important as a vote in favor of strike because it sends a message to management in all pre-92 universities that they have lost their academic staff.’ Students on campus had no or very little knowledge of the situation.
Durham diet on sustainable bugs Sam Shuttleworth and Finlay Milner of St Mary’s College at Durham University, finalists in the Npower Future Leaders Challenge 2014, offer an unusual treat as their sustainability project. They are promoting sustainable lifestyles among communities in their area. Sam and Finlay, both second year engineers, designed the campaign ‘Student Grub.’ Their aim is to encourage people to eat insects due to the environmental and financial benefits. As a part of their project, they have been visiting schools have visited Joseph Swan School in Gateshead, been promoting on campus in Durham, visited Npower’s office in Rainton, and appeared on BBC Radio North East. During their visits and events, they have been serving up a variety of different insect-based foods, including grasshopper kebabs and chocolate covered crickets.
LSE grants awards for asylum seekers The London School of Economics has launched two scholarships, each worth ÂŁ20,000 for asylum seeker students who have been offered places to study in the prestigious London university. According to the LSE website, the award will be included in the School’s overall financial assistance programme for undergraduate students who are of low-income backgrounds. The ÂŁ4 million financial package is available to UK, EU and Overseas students. Catherine Baldwin, LSE’s director of recruitment and admissions, said: “Asylum seekers do not qualify for home fee status, nor are they entitled to government grants and loans. Most asylum seekers do not have permission to work. We hope that these LSE awards make our degree programmes more accessible to some of the brightest and best students from around the world.â€?
Job  Title:  Barista  &  Sandwich  Assistant  Employer:  Hugo’s   Closing  Date:  30/11/2014 Salary:  £6.50  per  hour  Basic  job  description:  Take  away  coffee  and  sandwich  shop  has  vacancy  for  part  time  work,  2  hours  per  day  Monday  to  Fri- GD\ PXVW EH À H[LEOH 7R VWDUW -DQXDU\ 2015). Person  Requirements:  Barista  trained.  Location:  -HVPRQG
Images: Denisa Bochkareva, Steph Wales, Gabriel Gonzalez, Jadriaen
Antonia Velikova News Editor
The Courier
.9
Monday 27 October 2014
Comment
thecourieronline.co.uk/comment
Comment Editors: Victoria Armstrong & Matt Corden Online Comment Editor: Ruth Davis courier.comment@ncl.ac.uk | @Courier_Comment
Failure to vote, failure to care
The NUS’s failure to condemn ISIS is moral cowardice and undermines efforts to organise resistance
Adam Thompson
A
motion condemning atrocities committed by terrorist group ISIS was rejected by the National Union of Students (NUS) this week, on the grounds of ‘Islamophobia’. Black Students’ Officer Malia Bouattia said: ‘We recognise that condemnation of ISIS appears to have become a justification for war and blatant Islamophobia… This rhetoric exacerbates the issue at hand and is in essence a further attack on those we aim to defend.’ It is reasonable that calls for war should be avoided, but a quick look through the motion reveals no war-mongering, and certainly no sign of islamophobia. The first resolution brought before the committee was to support international students in the UK from all affected areas. Another was to build solidarity with moderate groups in the UK and Iraq. It seems the motion was neither offensive nor racist, and was actually beautifully written with the potential for doing some good at home, and perhaps even abroad (albeit in a small way). Furthermore, it was clearly stated the author had no confidence in US military intervention anyway.
“We should at least be confident enough to know the difference between right and wrong”
In refusing to condemn violence carried out by terrorist organisations, Ms Bouattia and other senior NUS members have failed to do what many Muslim and student organisations have already done. In July, representatives of Sunni and Shia groups converged at Westminster, with Maulana Shahid Raza of Leicester Central Mosque saying: ‘ISIS does not represent the main Sunni Muslims’ ideology’. Is it not concerning that a non-Muslim organisation is failing to support mainstream Muslims for fear of offending them? It seems the NUS is paralysed by confusion and a crisis of identity. It has no idea what to stand for. There will be those who suggest the NUS is a toothless, prattling collective anyway, one that should not be wading into the topics of international politics. Certainly its ability to affect change abroad is virtually non-existent – short of sending students to pose for selfies beside village wells in the Gambia. That said, it would be a nice gesture to show a bit of support for those suffering unimaginable pain in the Middle East right now. Regardless, the NUS would maintain it has quite a bit of range and influence. It has strong beliefs on the subjects of David Lammy and jabbering carica-
Illustrations by Jack Goodall ture Nigel Farage. It was quick to denounce Israel for its response to terrorist attacks on its borders. It is a shame they chose this issue as an opportunity to stay uncharacteristically neutral, since they are in a unique position to offer help. Swathes of students come from abroad to study in the UK, a significant number from areas directly affected by the imperialist aspirations of ISIS. Some will have left families behind, others, even if they have no first-hand experience of the suffering such groups impose, might cast melancholy glances at events back home. By offering a support network and building links with local mosques, a sense of community could have been fostered. Outlining a clear position on the subject would not have victimised Muslims or encouraged Islamophobia, it would have demonstrated solidarity with the millions of people
worldwide suffering at the hands of maniacal regimes, and the international students lucky enough to escape them. This is a prevailing trend in our society: choosing to be inoffensive at the expense of doing the right thing. I find it bemusing that this has become the most serious sin a person can commit in writing, not inciting violence or telling lies, but hurting someone’s feelings. This is the mistake of Ms Bouttia, the mistake of the NUS, and the mistake of modern politicians. We’re weighed down with moral inertia. In the case of the NUS, some people have so little faith in their own moral judgement that they daren’t float the notion ethnic cleansing, and a justice system with a cruel emphasis on beheading might not be good enough for the people of Syria or Iraq. It’s not imperialism, racism or any other ‘ism’ to say that.
And what of ISIS? A video was recently released online showing the murder of a young woman for adultery. One militant addressed the girl: ‘This punishment right now, is a result of your action you chose. No one forced you, therefore you need to accept God’s law’. She was then bound and struck with rocks until dead. All this in front of her own father, who refused to forgive her. If we don’t trust in military intervention, we should at least be confident enough to know the difference between right and wrong. An opportunity was missed here to support vulnerable groups, create stronger ties between universities and moderate religious groups and discourage radicalisation. Instead, due to a vacancy of principle, nothing will be done. Ms Bouattia and the NUS will sit down at their next meeting in November to ensure no one is offended as the pattern persists.
we look at the EU’s legal institutions. For, whilst Britain retains its national sovereignty, there are increasing numbers of judgments coming down from Strasbourg and Luxembourg that seem to threaten this. Most remember, for instance, the European Court of Human Right’s ruling that, contrary to British law, prisoners should be allowed to vote. Rulings such as this suggest that the EU does not quite understand its jurisdiction in regards to its members. When Britain acceded to the European Convention of Human Rights (created in part to avoid repetition of the human rights atrocities from WWII), it was in support of the fundamental ideals that all persons were entitled to freedom, the right to free speech and to not be tortured – I
suspect it was not quite envisaged that these rights would be increasingly stretched to the point they are now. We can take guidance here from the highest two judges in Britain, Baroness Hale and Lord Neuberger. Both have given speeches in the last year, which imply an increasing concern about the EU’s legal order. Lord Neuberger stated that the notion that an EU Court could overrule laws borne from Westminster as “little short of offensive”. Meanwhile, Baroness Hale reemphasised that, whilst British Courts are legally bound to consider judgments from the European Courts, they are not obliged to follow them, noting renewed focus on the British common law over European laws. Whilst these comments are far from overtly sug-
gesting that Britain leave the EU, they raise very valid points. This does not even begin to consider general criticisms that much of the European Courts’ judgments are prepared by lower-level employees and not by the main judges themselves. There are many issues concerning a power struggle of sorts between Britain and the EU, which do not appear to be on a path to being resolved, of which sparring legal institutions are but one example. If this is the case, the argument for voting out of the EU come 2017 is likely strengthened. At any rate, it is vital that we turn attention away from cheap sensationalism regarding the EU and begin to consider the merits of staying and leaving before the referendum ultimately turns its ugly head.
The EU tramples all over national sovereignty Victoria Armstrong
A
s always, European Union membership is a topical issue in Britain at the moment. We float along in the wake of the 2011 European Communities Act, with the prospect of the 2017 referendum ahead. We are bombarded by media coverage of the growing support for Eurosceptic politics, as arguably evidenced by the spreading cancer that is UKIP. However, whilst much of anti-EU sentiment is xenophobic and overly-patriotic, that is not to say that it does not have a point, albeit buried quite far underground. This can be especially seen when
10.comment
SOAP BOX
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Mind over matter
Awareness of issues around mental health is improving, but more still needs to be done
HALLOWEEN Ah, Halloween. A time in which wonder, spookiness and a desire for an unhealthy amount of sweets enters the hearts and minds of children and adults alike. And of course, who could forget the costumes! As the time to don our spooky garb draws near, I can’t help but feel a wave of dread come over me. No, it’s not because I have a lifelong fear of masks or fake blood or anything like that. Rather the idea of the inevitable wave of offensive costumes makes me shudder. Call me a killjoy if you like, but there is no joy to be found in distasteful, racist, sexist outfits, or anything else that can be found in the Seventh Circle of Lad Bible Hell. So please, before you decide that dressing up as the likes of Jimmy Savile would be totally amazing banter, consider the people you might be hurting by doing so. And if you aren’t deterred? Well, the bin’s over there. Maybe don’t come out until you’ve learned not to be human garbage. Leigh McDougle Image: Allan Ajifo @ Flickr
Daniel Robertson & Ruth Davis
CYCLE PATHS When I bought a bike to get into uni each day, I expected to come across some problems. However, it wasn’t until I actually got on my aluminium horse that I realised how dire the situation is. The biggest issue is the bike lanes – or more so the lack thereof. Firstly, it is very unclear as to where one should cycle: some parts of the roads are too dangerous (due to the speed of the cars) and some pavements are too crowded by pedestrians. There seem to be no actual rules and regulations when it comes to cyclists. The lack of bike lanes reinforces this, because it leaves the cyclists in a limbo, instead of giving them their own place in traffic. The lack of bike lanes is very discouraging, leading to more people walking (not very time efficient) or taking a bus or metro or car (both more expensive and worse for the environment). It is in everyone’s interest to pave the way for more bike lanes and make Newcastle a more bike-friendly city. Christa Tjadens
W
orld Mental Health Awareness Day took place on 10th October, an annual event which aims to raise awareness of mental illness, promote mental health, and reduce the stigma surrounding mental illness. Mental health is an ever increasing problem which has never been successfully tackled. Recently, a report by the London School of Economics and the Centre of Mental Health has called into question the need to regiment a more effective mental health care scheme in the immediate future. Consequently, the resurgence of mental health awareness is now in the forefront of the media consciousness. Is this the time to make clear the severity of mental health issues faced by students? Whilst mental health as a whole is dealt with appallingly by both the medical profession and public opinion, the situation is even worse when it comes to students. Assuming that the biggest concerns of a student life are the aftermaths of vodka-fuelled
WEB FREE LIFE As a web junkie, enduring four weeks without Internet seemed an unpleasant prospect. It was no fault but my own; adjourning that call to Virgin Media until the busiest time of the broadband installation calendar meant a long waiting list, and feelings of trepidation greater than those of military spouses. At first, it felt like I’d missed everything. I was a castaway in an infinite ocean of reality. A matter of days, however, made me realise that I’d missed nothing, and was better off without constant connectivity. No (anti)-social networking forced me to engage with people face-to-face, replacing sterile ‘LOL’s with meaningful conversation; a break from the web’s relentless stream of distractions allowed me space to think, not to mention be more productive; I began to spend more time being creative, and I was beginning to appreciate the joys of a fulfilled, disconnected existence. Of course, within seconds of broadband being installed I was back to my old ways. But I continue to- actually, sorry, but have you seen this cat video? Al Bell
Leigh McDougle
nights out, the general public consensus is that life at uni is a pretty jammy deal – going out most nights, sleeping in late, doing little (if any) work until the night before a deadline. Basically, students just have the time of their life, right? Controversially, NUS studies into mental health amongst UK students have exposed a daunting picture regarding issues faced during time in academic study. With less than a quarter (21%) of students actively sharing their feelings regarding their mental health with anyone, it is unsurprising the
“Mental health is an ever-increasing problem which has never been successfully tackled”
percentage of students with mental health issues seeking counselling provided by the university falls even shorter at only 1 in 10. This is alarming when combined with the knowledge that 20% of students suffer from mental illness or mental health difficulties. Mental stress has been proven to be high in students due to the pressures of a degree, with the
main identified triggers of mental stress being categorised as due to course related deadlines, exams, financial difficulties, homesickness and harassment by lecturers or other students. And that’s just the most common factors. Still an easy life? Mental health awareness aims to change this. Recognising the overwhelming task of trying to tackle this massive problem, they warn people and universities of their responsibility in encouraging students with mental health issues to seek help. It cannot be stressed enough how important this is how is the mental health situation going to change if the people who are at the forefront of tomorrow are being imprisoned in the view that mental illness is shameful and not to be discussed. How many people are aware of the fact that there are options of treatment for mental illness or difficulties, instead of being fobbed off with the medical professions’ favourite solution to all things mental health related: 20mg of fluoxetine daily and a waiting list for cognitive behavioural therapy. Society makes it acceptable for students to care more about whether their friends have boyfriends than how they are doing in terms of health. Mental health awareness seeks to change this. And this change cannot come fast enough.
The Courier
comment.11
Monday 27 October 2014
Trolling in the deep New laws might come from good intentions, but won’t do anything to stop online abuse
I
Lewis Bedford
n typical fashion, the internet imploded last week. Headlines fixed on Chloe Madeley’s recent verbal assault over on Twitter. Long story short, this soon-to-be publicly shamed individual sent rape threats to the daughter of TV duo Richard and Judy in apparent response to Judy Flanningan’s recent comments on the Ched Evan’s charge. Taking a stance against what he termed a “baying cyber-mob”, last Sunday Justice Secretary Chris Grayling showed clear intentions to increase the maximum sentence for online ‘trolling’ - an internet phrase depicting anything from merely rustling someones Jimmies to cold blooded threats of violence. The proposals are currently pending review in the House of Lords. Naturally, the internet is concerned, and who’s to blame it? Indeed, deep down we’re all trolls; getting on our high horse about some old-bullshit, feeding on the grammatical errors and warped opinions of complete strangers. Moreover, the internet really wouldn’t be the same without it. In truth, even Grayling has found himself scrolling down a comment section blessed by a group of Beliebers going straight for the jugular of their Directioner-counterparts. God forbid anyone who tries to take that away from us. But, we need not worry; MichaelJackson-eating-popcorn.jpeg isn’t going to be replaced with subpoenas any time soon. At present the changes are merely increasing the sentence of the Communications Act 2003 which, for the last few years, has provided that an individual is guilty of an offence where their poor taste proves “grossly offensive or of an indecent, obscene or menacing character” resulting in “annoyance, inconvenience or needless anxiety” for the victim. Despite it’s rather open-ended wording, the Act has proven
useful on a number of occasions, locking up the likes of Sean Duffy, a particularly warped individual that took it upon himself to mock children who had committed suicide. Similarly, in 2010 the Act dished the dirt on Colm Cross, who, according to the Chairwoman of the Magistrates bench, had “preyed on bereaved families”, including those of the late Big Brother star, Jade Goody. Hearing the likes of Duffy and Cross receiving eighteen weeks in prison and seeing their no-longer-anonymous faces plastered all over the internet provides some solace for the victims, however, the internet seem somewhat divided on whether or not analogous cases should be treated with a heavier hand as Grayling intends. Furthermore, it seems many are of the opinion that trolling shouldn’t be criminalised at all.
“In addition to the fact that deterring free speech generally is a no-go, everyone knows you shouldn’t feed the trolls”
Type ‘trolling reform’ into any search engine and soon enough you’ll come across some suspiciously defensive freedom of speech tirade, however, it is worthy of note. Without venturing into a mind-numbing political debate on fundamental freedoms, it can’t be denied that there is a limit to freedom of speech in the UK, and unfortunately the boundary between what is and is not protected isn’t clear enough. With Grayling’s heavy hands pushing for reform, that already blurred line could be seen fading further in the near future. Moreover, it seems Grayling’s core intention is to deter future offenders, which, although well intentioned, seems to miss the point. In addition to the
fact that deterring free speech generally is certainly a no-go, everyone knows you shouldn’t feed the trolls. Increasing the sentence may do more harm than good by adding to the supposed excitement that comes with internet trolling. On a similar vein, it is unclear whether an extended sentence would make much difference anyway. A full-time troll in most cases takes to the internet to seek the attention they fail to receive away from the keyboard – individuals like Cross and Duffy need some sort of rehabilitation, not more time alone. Duffy, when speaking at trial, admitted his online tendencies were an “addiction”. Similarly, Cross was said to have taken considerable pleasure out of his acts and also showed little remorse towards the victims even in the face of an eighteen week sentence. Not only that, but in both cases, the extent of the taunts seemed to warrant an indeterminate stay in a rehabilitation clinic, or even mental institute, rather than time behind bars. Although well intentioned, I have little faith in the changes making any improvement on the current system. Rather, the internet may be seen as both bane and antidote with online communities often providing recourse. Back in 2012, for instance, when faced with a tasteless tweet about his deceased father, Tom Daley chose to retweet the comment. What followed was in many respects a form of vigilante justice; a barrage of public shaming straight back at the original offender. A name and shame approach might prove not only less autocratic when maintaining social standards across the world-wide-web, but also more appropriate. That being said, just as the interests of freedom of speech must be respected, they also must not bar individuals from recovering, particularly those who suffer considerable harm, psychological or otherwise. There needs to be a balance, and, without Grayling’s proposals, it seems to be already working. Lets hope that balance isn’t unsettled over the next few months.
Too much costume drama Image: Archie4oz @ Flickr
The same controversies roll around every Halloween, and it’s getting boring
Victoria Armstrong
A
s the Halloween period looms once again, so too does the costume frenzy that accompanies it. Once Halloween has been and gone, criticisms will follow en masse as the nation’s headlines fixate on the tenuous line between appropriate and inappropriate. But really, who can disagree? I am not referring to the overdone criticism of girls for taking it as an excuse to dress ‘sluttily’ – which in a modern age of gender equality is simply moronic and yawnworthy – but the recent trend of taking inspiration from the news, especially tragic news may be a premature step; the modern age isn’t that modern, yet. Halloweens gone by have seen a multitude of
Jimmy Saviles, Nazis and who could forget the notorious two from Chester who, last year, transformed themselves into the twin towers, circa 9/11 – crashed planes and people falling to their deaths included. Now this is not a matter of freedom of expression; you should be allowed to dress up as whatever you fancy, on any day of the year. But that’s a rather different question from whether you actually should. It’s easy today, with the way news is communicated, to feel somewhat removed. After all, every day there are reports of numerous deaths all around the world. However, it is all too easy to forget that these events that motivate such costumes as the aforementioned do still affect people. So why do supposedly intelligent people still think its comical to don the disguise of various crude notorious figures? I mean, no one actually thinks what they are dressing up as is amusing yet, for reasons unknown, some see Halloween as representing an ex-
emption of sorts. Nonetheless, it is not; you just look like a prick. It is reasonably easy for a person, who has never had a close one murdered or abused, or been subjected to such horrors themselves, to be blasé about such matters. We are desensitized by the media and these stories seem distant and un-relatable, but this is no excuse. The majority of us are very fortunate in terms of where we have been born and the education we are receiving. We should have a greater sense of empathy for the world around us. So please – as you are choosing your Halloween costume this year, stay far far away from the Ebola-related containment suits, and all other highly morally incongruous get-ups that you may consider LOL-worthy. Even if for no other reason than your future potential employers are likely to have a stalk of your social media and those photos of you infecting the local student community with your obliviousness may not seem such a good idea then.
The
Voice of
Wisdom This week can be summed up simply as a reminder of the supreme importance of YOLO. That’s what every single thing has proved. You only live once. Yeah I know it went through a phase the other year where like everyone was saying it, but this week has shown that it totally is so important. This ebola shit? YOLO. You never know what’s waiting in some far flung corner of the globe to get you. Same with this dude who was shot at in like, Canada or somewhere. Everyone seems bothered about it, but point is he’s dead now. You’re not. Embrace that. Everyone has seemed pretty hung up on this Oscar Pistorious trial too. Yeah yeah, society isn’t fair, if he wasn’t famous then he’d have had longer. But that’s the whole point. Society isn’t fair. All men are equal, just some are more equal than others. Father’s always told me it’s about who you know, not what you know. Everyone bar the proletariat knows that one. So why does everyone get all arse faced over it? It’s not as though he got off free, five years is a long time, dudes.
“In my philosophy lectures the odd word catches my ear, and you realise how much these philosophical dudes just thought”
It does make you wonder whether those old philosophical geezers had a point though; sometimes I think there really must be a deeper meaning, you know? Like what is all this shit really about? In lectures the odd words catch my ear, and you realise how much these philosophical dudes just like, thought. And how in this society no one stops to do that. No one stops to look at the stars. Or count them. Can stars even be counted? I mean, sometimes I wonder if they were right, and there really is something more. Can there be anything more than drinking and smoking and getting laid? I can have any girl I like, and trust me, I do. I absolutely only go on Tinder for a larf, but you know, sometimes when you’re bored of an evening and having a quick swipe through it. Then carpe noctem and all that. YOLO. But dude, I’m starting to feel old. Third year and that, I finally need to get my fuck together and think about the real world. Of course, Father’s little company would offer me a job, but I want to make my own way in the world. I want to really make a difference.
“There’s really something to be gained by donning the mind set of the lower classes for a while - opens your eyes, you know?”
Buzzing for my Halloween night out, definitely one of the best nights of the year to get totally and utterly gazeboed. Not yet fully decided on my costume, though it would be totes hilair to go as a passenger on one of a Malaysian airways flight... I know it’s a common celebration, but there’s really something to be gained by donning the mindset of the lower classes for a while, really opens your eyes, you know? I just want to go somewhere cheap and nasty, re-live those goddamn awful uncivilised fresher days before I really found myself and have a night I’ll never remember. Because YOLO and all that fucking jazz.
Hugo
As overheard by Ruth Davis Illustration by Lewis Bedford
12.lifestyle
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Lifestyle Editors: Jack Dempsey, Annie Lord, Holly Suttle & Tom Tibble
Emily Watton Not IDeal: The baby face curse
G
etting ID’d is the most normal, and potentially the most embarrassing thing about being a student. Usually, it all goes well and you can say: ‘Sure, here you go’, they look at it, nod and you can go in with that everso-slight smug feeling. But, it doesn’t always happen like that, does it? You forget it, you lose it, it’s getting renewed, they simply don’t believe the twit in the photo is you, the list is a long one. It can get ugly, and you pull out your arsenal of charm and flirtatious reason, or you try your student card - which never has and never will work. Some pull it off, I almost always fail and am sent packing with the friends whom I have ruined the night for (that’s the worst part). What gets me is that some people get ID’d far more than others. Such as: me. The one with the curse of Baby Face. It is a serious affliction. Getting ID’d is normal, but it’s a red-face-initiator when it happens repeatedly, or at a place where people are more likely to get OD’d rather than ID’d. I won’t name such establishments, but you know them. The places where everyone else will say: ‘What?! No one ever gets ID’d there!’ Succeeding in making you feel like a tool with a face of a toddler.
“You try your student card - which never has and never will work’’
Baby Face-itis isn’t the only cause however, for example, in a group of girls you can guarantee that the one singled out is more of the ‘pancake persuasion’ than a Double-D. That’s not to say girls have it harder. They can remedy some signs of being under twenty-five: they can wear make-up, stuff bras, wear heels, etc. Guys, no matter how metrosexual, still don’t usually use cosmetics, stuffing won’t help them get into clubs and platform shoes went out of style decades ago. They are left with what DNA gave them, the poor beggars. Not only that, but even if a guy is seven-foot tall, chiselled and has a full beard, they can still get picked on if the bouncer dislikes them. Or sometimes, people are just ID’d at random and you’re the unlucky one who enjoys the quips about everyone being so much more mature than you (whilst laughing at the guy dressed as a whoopee cushion, that doesn’t look like a whoopee cushion, I may add).
“I seem to possess an ID that is like half an ounce of fine Mexican heroin for bartenders and bouncers’’ Most understand the flip-side of the situation, the people asking for ID can be just as awkward as you. They don’t want to ask, but just have to. Though there are sadists who do it for kicks out there - I have met at least two. Everyone knows it’s a part of going out. Do we like it? Hell, no! It’s embarrassing when it happens repeatedly and/or if you get caught out. The victim shrinks to the size of a ten-year-old child with snotty nose, and Hooray! I seem to possess an ID that is like heroine for bartenders and bouncers, I am thinking of charging them for the privilege. Damn you, Baby Face.
Chat-up lines: too creepy even for Halloween? Lauren Hickin shares her view on chat-up line spew
T
he chat-up line. ‘Designed to shock and amuse’ according to our old friend, the urban dictionary. ‘Designed to make me want to rip my own arm out and start bashing you with the soggy end’ according to me at my most Wednesday-Adams-ish.
“The number of shots consumed directly correlates to how hilarious one will find these witticisms”
I will not attempt to deny that some women do respond to chat-up lines – as a general rule, the number of shots they have consumed directly correlates to how hilarious they will find these witticisms. But in spite of my lifelong devotion to mozzarella, Roquefort, Feta and even the humble Cheddar, I do not melt in the face of the unadulterated cheese that constitutes your average chat-up line. Whether you’re attempting to use them ironically or are a hundred percent serious, chat-up lines come off at best as desperate, at worst as too creepy, even for Halloween.
1 2 3
In fact, I would go as far as to say that on a night out, chat-up lines are somewhat superfluous. Given that in a club or a crowded bar, you have to shout to be heard and repeat yourself to be understood, the delivery and subsequent effect of even the most charming conversational skills are considerably diluted. Essentially, if someone isn’t attracted to you, chances are they aren’t going to change their minds based on a semi-intelligible innuendo. Similarly, if someone is attracted to you, chances are it won’t be based on the mastery of your polar bear line (despite many people’s belief that a cheesy chat-up line is the perfect way to break the ice).
“I do not melt in the face of the unadulterated cheese that constitutes your average chatup line”
tume instead. However, because The Courier prides itself on being an equal opportunities publication, the following is a list of the ten cheesiest Halloween pickup lines I could assemble, should you choose to ig-
“Chances are they aren’t going to change their minds based on a semiintelligible innuendo” nore my advice.
If I had my way, chat-up lines would be banned. If you really want to give someone a scare this Halloween, I would advise you to work on your cos-
10 shocking chat-up lines “You came as an angel? So, you wanted to save money on the costume?” ‘‘My friend’s the one over there dressed as a skeleton. He wanted to ask for your number but didn’t have the guts”
“I was going to come as a ghost but you’ll see my sheets later…”
4 5 6
“I wasn’t sure whether to come as a vampire, but with you I wouldn’t mind being awake all night…” “That costume looks a bit tight, I’m happy to help you out of it…” ‘‘I should’ve come as Google ‘cause now I’m Feeling Lucky…”
7 8 9 10
“Want to find out what I turn into at midnight?” “You look dead sexy. (See what I did there?)” “Hey, pumpkin, I bet I can put a smile on your face’’ “You’re decomposing in all the right places…”
Smoking: dead sexy? Yes
Rebecca Harrison and Phoebe Claire-Bower argue whether smoking is a turn on or just a load of hot air
I
s smoking hot? Answer: yes! The physicality of the act can be dissected to explain its attraction. The action of smoking a cigarette draws attention to the lips, an erogenous zone associated with sex. Male hands are similarly stimulating to watch, and the image created conjures the definitive thought: smoking is sexy. The Media must take responsibility for the ‘Cool Factor’ cigarettes purport. Since TVs became a must-have consumer item in the 1950s and Swinging Sixties, films and TV programmes glamorise smoking. The popular E4 drama Skins had actors regularly lighting up, and the idea of smoking as cool can be traced back to the iconic image of Danny Zuko in Grease, with a lit cigarette dangling from his mouth. The leather jacket, gelled hair and mild smoking addiction that was John Travolta embodied ‘cool’ and continues to resonate with audiences.
“Th The idea of smoking as cool can be traced back to Danny Zuko”
Smoking is also a great way to socialise and meet new people. Outside the entrance of Tiger Tiger, with a Koppaburg in one hand and a lilac Sobranie in the other (a gift for my 18th, just in case that came across as a bit too Snobby White Girl), I could easily bond with others over our shared activity. Ask a stranger “got a light?” and BANG! Instant conversation, right there. Females do find men who smoke attractive; despite the relentless and disturbing TV advertisements (the fish hook in cheek clip *shudder*) urging you to quit, the juxtaposing messages that have been blared at us by the media for the past age are hard to ignore. It will take much more petitioning for the image of smoking as desirable to be erased, so until then, caution must be exercised to prevent smoking becoming a habit. However, a social ciggy to introduce yourself to a girl you’ve been crushing on in lectures might not be too bad an idea, if you’re nervous.
A
No
lthough I have plenty of friends who smoke, all of whom are nice, intelligent and attractive, for me smoking is a huge turn-off, and it’s because I can’t turn off my senses. Say I’m at a club, and I go outside for some air, or because my friend is projectile vomiting in all directions. I glance away from the putrid sight of Tom embarrassing himself, after a quick Snapchat, and spot someone with Brad Pitt levels of good looks. Unfortunately, then they take a drag of a cigarette. It doesn’t look cool, it looks like I’m going to get lung cancer just by standing next to them. How a person smells is very important to me. If they’ve never heard of a washing machine, if their breath stinks, or they don’t wash their hair, the likelihood is I’ll spend two minutes in their company before saying I need the loo before they ask for my number. When someone smokes, everything stinks of it; and as soon as the smell dies down they’re lighting up again.
“It’s because I can’t turn off my senses”
If I somehow manage to navigate these turn-offs, kissing a person who smokes is like my senses are physically protesting against it. It’s like trying to lick an ashtray clean; I’ll be brushing my teeth for days, and probably have to use the line “I’m just not that into you” to get out of seeing them again. Smoking isn’t like in the movies. When you smoke, you don’t look like the characters from The Great Gatsby. Your lipstick doesn’t remain unsmeared, you don’t blow the smoke in an artful arc. You’re forcing me to smoke too, and often I’ll use the cloud to my advantage and vanish like a Derren Brown trick before you’ve finished exhaling.
Illustrations by Alice Holden
The Courier
.13
Monday 27 October 2014
Culture thecourieronline.co.uk/culture
Culture Editor: Kate Bennett Sections: Lifestyle, Fashion, Beauty, Arts, Music, Film, TV, Gaming and Science courier.culture@ncl.ac.uk | @CourierOnline
Blind D ate Hannah on Connor How was the first meet up? Well the thing about Lane7 is there’s a big glass window and my housemates who dropped me off were all in the car, so when I met Connor and walked in to sit down you could just see my friends all staring at us and as they tried to leave my friend freaked out and reversed backwards and me and Connor was just walking in and I was trying to play it cool pretending not to know these morons fucking up a simple reverse manoeuvre and all their staring faces. What was he wearing? He was wearing a turtleneck, and I’m a big fan of turtlenecks, all my friends laugh at me for wearing turtlenecks too much.
Connor McDonnell, 2nd Year English Lit Hannah Fitton, 3rd Year English Lit
Connor on Hannah
How were the arrangements made for the date? Well after being given each other’s numbers, she text me saying we should go bowling. We arranged a time and she arranged a lane and stuff, then we met at eight. Was she on time? She was, I arrived about ten minutes early to get us some drinks. Was that due to the nerves? No, just liked to be prompt. Thought I’d text her, see what she’d like to drink - G&T, then just waited at the bar for her. What were your first impressions of Hannah in terms of looks? Very pretty. Very well dressed.
Were there any awkward moments from 8 till the bowling? No not really, apart from he is quite serious looking, very calm and collected and serious and I’m like “Blah blah blah”.
Personality? You could tell she was very confident in the way she introduced herself. She came up to me and hugged me like, “hey I’m Hannah, let’s sit down” and she sort of drove initially, what to do. Made me feel very comfortable.
Was that off-putting? No, it was different. I’ve never met someone like that before. Did you go anywhere after the bowling? Tokyo, copied Hannah Redman. At one point I went to the toilet and there were these men there and I was like “what are you doing?” and they were like “you’re in the mens”. So that was embarrassing.
Almost sounds like she took control, is that true? No no no, not really. Like, I didn’t know what to expect and then when she initially introduced herself you could tell she was sort confident, bubbly, energetic, and I realised it would be easier than expected.
How long were you in Tokyo for? Until midnight.
What were the main topics of conversation during the date? Oh God, everything. I didn’t think it was possible to speak about so much in four hours, Christ. Yeah just sort of, general interests, films, music, she’s the fashion editor too so we spoke a bit about clothes, shit like that, personal life.
Did he walk you home? Yeah. I’ve never walked home from town before, only once from a night out. What kind of vibes do you think he was getting? I don’t know, I think he’s got a lot of dirt on me though because I was chatting so much shit. Who seemed the keenest of the two of you? Maybe me in a way because I talked so much but then possibly him because he was playing it cool. How could his performance on the date have been improved? Maybe talked more, like he’d talk about stuff on the surface but not really further than that, like not going to that much detail. I feel like he might have a lot to say for me about this because I told quite a lot of stupid stories, just babbling on about random crap. So there was no awkward moments? No, not on his behalf. There was one moment when I was at the till and this girl who is friend of a friend, who I don’t really know that well, came over and was chatting to me and it was just a bit like ‘I hope she doesn’t ask who he is because then it would be like errrr.’ Then I sat down and my house mates ex-boyfriend walked in and I haven’t seen him since they broke up so that was really awkward in itself because I saw him and we just saw each other. Rating? 8 What about him was worth the 8? We had a lot of things in common, we liked the same music and the same films. He seemed quite mysterious and intriguing. And he seemed older, a lot older, because he’s the year below but he seemed a lot older than my age. Was there anything bizarre about him? He said that he finds it hard to get drunk which is a bit awkward because I was really pissed by the end of the night. Do you think you could have improved your own performance? Yeah probably. He said to me that I was very open and honest so I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. Probably not a good thing.
Was there anything that struck you as unusual about her? She didn’t know who Chic were. You know the band, with Nile Rodgers? Also she told me about the concoction she likes to have at the end of nights out. She likes to eat cheesy chips with gravy and garlic sauce which I thought was… interesting. Also we went to Tokyo and she came out laughing and told me she’d walked into the guys toilets. Cute. So where exactly did you go over the course of the date? Lane 7, Tokyo, walked her home, then walked myself home. Who won the bowling? Me. Connor did. How do you feel you could have done better on the date? Oh God. Christ. I just nailed it. No, I don’t know. That’s quite difficult. How do you feel Hannah could have performed better on the date then? I don’t know, I just thought everything went very smoothly. But if there had to be one thing? [A very long pause] She rejected a kiss from me at the end of the night. So how did the date end? Walked her home from Tokyo, said our goodbyes. All the way back to Jesmond? Pretty much, yeah. Said farewell. Asked her if she would see me again, she said yeah, we shook on next Tuesday but I don’t know how dedicated to that she’ll be. I’ll stick to my side of the deal but I don’t know about her.
Someone caught your eye? Looking for love? Send in your details for the Blind Date to c2.lifestyle@ncl.ac.uk
Was there a goodbye kiss? Nope, she rejected me, point blank. I went in to kiss her and she was like no, no, so I don’t know if that’s the first date rules or if she just genuinely didn’t want to kiss me. Rate your date? High 8, maybe 9. Not sure if that’s a bit too eager, but definitely up there.
14.lifestyle
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Lifestyle Editors: Jack Dempsey, Annie Lord, Holly Suttle and Tom Tibble
Benazir Parween
H
Horrifying Habits
Nosferatoon’s haunts
alloween is just around the corner. Unlike the rest of the world however, horribleness is not just limited to October 31 for students. From coming to terms with the terrifying tonnes of reading that you still have to do to the disturbing deadlines for your assignments, students get caught in the middle of petrifying situations all year round – the horrors of disgusting students among us continue to haunt us all. Are you one of them? Here’s a list for you to find out:
“That stamp on your hand from last night does not make you look cool, just unhygienic”
The Stinky Monkey Want to faint every time this person opens their mouth to speak? Be it close or far, it is horrendous. Do they even brush their teeth? They need to see a dentist right now! Tip: Slyly offer them a mint or gum. Try keeping a pack with you all the time. Are you the culprit? Run to Boots now and buy yourself a toothbrush. The Party Animal Whoever came up with that title definitely knew what they were talking about – ‘Animal’. Nothing against a good night of fun with your friends but, please, take a shower the next morning. That stamp of shame from the club last night is still on your hand. It does not make you look cool, just unhygienic. Tip: If this is you and you are that hung-over person, please shower yourself in deodorant/perfume BEFORE the lecture? The ‘No sweat, no change’ Justifier “Only had a seminar for an hour for the day? Let’s just wear this top every day until someone notices.” There’s always someone who decides clean clothes are not a necessity. A fresh set of clothes, undergarments and socks will do you good. Tip: Just avoid this person at all costs if they stink. They’ll get the memo. Sound familiar? Get washing.
Photo: George Markomichelakis
I
f you’re looking for an experience that will truly send shivers down your spine this Halloween, you’ve come to the right city. Newcastle-upon-Tyne is rumoured to be home to some of the most haunted places in the UK. From chatty child ghosts to spirits with a bit of a mean streak, you’re in for a treat. So dust off your Ouija board. It’s about to get paranormal up in here.
The Castle Keep
normal investigations. And it won’t cost you much –some guided tours offer student discounts.
The Literary and Philosophical Society Who says ghosts don’t love a good read? The Lit and Phil has the largest collection of literature and music outside of London. All three floors are supposedly haunted by numerous ghosts. Staff members have reported sounds of pages turning and footsteps in deserted areas. Others have said they felt they were being watched in some areas.
The Old George Inn
“Never ask to borrow a pen from them, it’ll be bacteria infested” The Garbage Bag Student Gar-bag-e? Basically, you are using your bag as a trash can. We noticed. It’s going to turn into Narnia and you are not going to find anything in there. Do you really want to stick your hand into that disgusting, soggy cheeseburger wrapper from two weeks ago, when taking out your notepad? Tip: Never ask to borrow a pen from them – ever. It’ll be bacteria-infested. Are you guilty? Give your bag a thorough clean at the end of each week. Even better, avoid throwing shit in your bag. The Leftover Junkie We all love some good leftovers – no need to cook or clean up much. But eating food that was left out in the open over the weekend, or worse the week, is plain gross. It’s shocking what laziness does to you. Tip: If you’re cooking for the week, refrigerate, or even freeze them in separate containers for different days. This makes it easier to just take one out, reheat it and wash up. Avoiding this being? Stay away from their maggot infested tuna tin.
“You might not suspect it was once a place where severed human heads were placed on sticks at the Gate’s entrance”
century of existence. High Sheriffs were once the main law enforcement officers in the county, and responsible for many brutal deaths by hanging, and drawing and quartering. If you dare to visit the Black Gate, you might not suspect it was once a place where severed human heads were placed on sticks at the Gate’s entrance. Hundreds of people are reported to have been attacked on ghost walk tours of this area – you’ve been warned. Ashley Williams
Let’s start off with the place that gave Newcastle its name. Overlooking the River Tyne, The Castle Keep is known as one of the most eerie areas in the North East. With nearly 2000 years’ worth of prison life, wars, witches and grisly murders – it’s likely to be one seriously haunted castle.
This haunted pub is located in the Cloth Market. The Old George is Newcastle’s oldest, dating back to the 16th century.
“You might come across “Members of staff have an entity that makes reported paranormal some people ill” incidents”
According to ghost hunt group Alone in the Dark Entertainment, you might come across a variety of spooky spirits – like a young boy who talks to visitors, or an entity that makes some people ill. If you’re unlucky enough – you could get attacked by a ghost who just might leave a mark! Gary Carter works inside the castle, and says he’s personally never experienced any ghostly encounters. If you don’t want to take his word for it, don’t be worried about having to go it alone. Many tour groups in the area use the castle as a venue for their para-
Members of staff have reported paranormal incidents, some saying they feel uneasy working alone in certain areas. If you stop by for a drink in the main bar, you might encounter the ghost of a man and his dog that occasionally pay the pub a visit.
The Black Gate The entrance to the Castle Keep was built in the 13th century, and is considered just as haunted as the main castle. It’s known to be the home of the ghost of a High Sheriff from the Black Gate’s first
The Courier
lifestyle.15
Monday 27 October 2014
Half-arsed Halloween
It’s 9.30pm on Halloween night, your mates will be round in half an hour and you’ve still not got any gear sorted for your night out. But don’t worry - Editor Tom Nicholson will show you how to do just about enough to avoid looking like a killjoy
Pumpkin
Costume If you’ve suddenly realised that you’re completely unprepared for Halloween then clearly, this will be your most pressing concern. Fortunately, there are many options open to you. The most obvious answer might appear to be to grab a bedsheet and attempt to become a ghost, but this hackneyed interpretation of the unquiet dead is trés démodé and frankly more bother than it’s worth. Quite apart from having to find scissors, hack holes in the sheet, stick it on your head and feel like you’re suffocating all night, you’ll have to go into town and get a new set of sheets afterwards. Instead, clamber inside a bin bag and present yourself as rubbish to your fellow party guests. Not only does the little self-deprecatory joke prevent anyone from making tedious jokes along the lines of, “You look like shit, mate”, but you also get the benefit of sweating off two thirds of your body fat while trapped within the mini-sauna which will form around your torso. If you’ve only got time to get ready between the time you buy a Metro ticket and the time the doors close, simply find a patch of mud and flop about in it like a guppy caught in those plastic rings that hold beers together. Nobody will question you because: a) it’s Halloween and anything short of actually lacerating yourself seems to be fair game these days; b) people might think you’re a TA recruit practicing urban manoeuvres; and c) you will smell quite a lot like shit; and d) you will look berserk.
Absolutely terrifying
“Destroy all of your belongings and strew their constituent fragments everywhere to create the feeling that your flat is now part of the set of a film set in some dystopian future”
“If your guests start complaining, simply start saying “YOU’RE WRONG” in gradually louder and more violent tones until they either shut up or leave”
Treats
Decorations Nobody wants to be a boring Barry with no decorations in his house on one of the top four most decoration-heavy times of the year (alongside Christmas, Diwali and Eurovision), so you’re going to have to get some sort of razzmatazz scattered about to acknowledge the season. Grab anything and everything that you own which is orange or black and chuck it as widely as possible around your front room. Perhaps the quickest thing to do is to destroy all of your belongings and strew their constituent fragments across the party area, thus creating the feeling that your flat is now part of the set of a film set in some dystopian future where vandals run amok. You will, of course, have to replace all of your belongings afterwards but it’s really a small price to pay next to the pain and embarrassment of having to seat your guests in a bare, bland, flavourless environment and potentially losing them as friends forever. If you’re one of those people who’s precious about having material possessions (read: capitalist scum) then you could take advantage of the mouldering condiments hanging around in your fridge/cupboard/sock drawer. Squirt them all into a small pile on the middle of the floor and let the aromas percolate. It’ll look strange enough that people will notice it, but hopefully not so much that they’ll report you to the Environmental Health Agency. The smell should conjure up a feeling of foreboding and general unease which is clearly in keeping with the spirit of the season. Carpets, like pie crusts, are made to be broken.
If you’re fortunate enough to have a pumpkin to hand, either because your more organised flatmate had the wherewithal to grab one earlier on or because you accidentally bought one when you were looking for a butternut squash in Tesco, then your task is relatively straightforward. Don’t bother trying to carve a face into it, as this will take fucking ages. You don’t have fucking ages. You’ve got half an hour. Grab any sharp implement and jab it repeatedly into your pumpkin. Go to town on it. Lacerate that bastard. Mutilate it. If you can’t reach any sharp implements, then just use your fists. It’s always far better to look like you’ve tried to do something which clearly hasn’t worked than to do absolutely nothing. It doesn’t matter if you’ve no idea what it is you were trying to achieve, just as long as it’s apparent that you were definitely trying to do something. But what am I saying? Of course you don’t have a pumpkin, you’re a layabout. Pumpkins are also notoriously hard to source in such short time frames as the one you’re working within. Grab an orange, tangerine, Satsuma or other small round orange foodstuff from a flatmate’s cupboard. Grab a pen, draw a face on it, and the job, as they say, is a good ‘un. This is probably going to be the hardest thing to blag, but if you just keep talking over the top of any complaining guests then they’ll eventually give up. If they persist, simply start saying “YOU’RE WRONG” in gradually louder and more violent tones until they either shut up or leave.
A perfectly executed satsuma lantern
Children, I’m told, are wont to wander up to houses and demand delicious treats from residents, on the understanding that if the resident says no then they’ll be in line for a trick of some description. If you choose to go along with this charade, and legitimate what is essentially daylight blackmail, then you’ll need to ransack your home for appropriate tidbits. One particularly good source of tidbits is The Drawer. The Drawer is a space which defies several elementary laws of physics in its seemingly insatiable appetite for bits and bobs from around the house. If you look hard enough, you’ll probably find Schroedinger’s cat in there too. Kids these days are well into the sorts of things you find in The Drawer: batteries, for their iPods and Beyblades; assorted sizes of screws and bolts, for assembling those downhill racing cars that are a staple of American sitcoms; low-denomination foreign coins, which are obviously great fun for anyone of any age; and spare/ possibly burnt out light bulbs, which can be used to teach the young ones about electricity and how it is a fickle and unforgiving mistress.
Ruth Loeffler Chiselled torsos:
an absession too far
O
ver the recent years, I have witnessed a most terrifying trend occurring. Is there a single person of this generation whose Twitter/Facebook/Instagram feeds are not OVERFLOWING with images of ‘leg days,’ ‘arm days’ and ‘just about any other body part you can think of days’ as well. It’s beyond ridiculous now. Boys are treating the gym like some kind of holy place and the way to enlightenment: PUMP THOSE ARMS. I don’t know about you but back when I was younger, a six-pack was only something belonging to movie stars, footballers and generally people who can afford a £800-a-session personal trainer. Nowadays it seems like every decent looking guy has those hideous calluses showing the world that actually yes, you do lift bro. It is not enough just to be healthy now? Do you actually have to look like a cloud or Michelin man to get girls?
“We would much rather see guys who care less about their appearance than we do”
So who to blame for this horrifying trend? I hate to say it NCL but after watching the last series of Geordie Shore, my conclusion is... Gaz. Well, not just Gaz, all of them. Including - I’m ashamed to say - TOWIE. Just count how many times it shows them sweating it out in the gym or walking around their ‘pad’ with just their boxers on. They’re proud of it. Their abs are flawless, their chests shaved, their eyebrows plucked. They also look like idiots. The thing that you gym bunnies don’t realise is that the fact you go to the gym every other day WITHOUT FAIL does not interest us. In fact, it just makes us feel really guilty about the amount of chocolate we devoured in front of The X Factor last night. We would much rather see guys who care less about their appearance than we do. No you can’t borrow our moisturiser by the way. And don’t even think about the tweezers. Don’t get me wrong - a beer gut at 19 is definitely just as scary as abs that look like they’d impale us, but surely there’s a healthy balance? Just like the new ‘fitnotthin’ campaign for women, maybe we should start one for men. The most attractive body is not one that is honed inside a sweaty gym, opposite a mirror whilst you grunt and check out your biceps. We want someone who takes his dog on a run, helps his dad with the DIY or used to play rugby back
“Sacrifice the unnatural ‘Geordie pack’ and settle on something more normal”
in high school. Sacrifice the unnatural ‘Geordie pack’ and settle on something more normal. And don’t even get me started on the ‘supplements.’ There is no bigger turn off in the world than someone talking about their newfound whey protein powder which- they assure us- has been proven to have NO effect whatsoever on the size of their uh... package. Most boys have been genetically blessed with the fact that their body is less susceptible to being overweight than women are. It’s written into your DNA already and, believe me, us girls hate you for it. My advice is to REMEMBER this and use it to your advantage please. Gaz really is not all that.
16.fashion
Monday 27th October 2014
The Courier
Fashion Editors: Amy O’Rourke and Hannah Fitton Online Fashion Editor: Hannah Goldstein
What’s Hot? Tessa Jones Have you checked out the new fashion app, Grabble?
G
rabble. Fashion doesn’t spring to mind when you first hear this word but it’s an app that is trying to revolutionise online shopping. With a similar premise to dating app Tinder, you set your boundaries on price and gender then a random selection of clothing and accessories appears for you to decide upon. You swipe right if you love it, or want to ‘grab’ it, or swipe left if it’s not your sort of thing, much like your potential dates. The items you’ve grabbed are then saved in a basket, each with a link to buy online. There is a huge range of retailers, from Missguided to Topshop to Net-A-Porter, so you can find something whatever your budget and style. The best feature, for savvy shoppers like me anyway, is the notification system for the moment any of your saved items go into the sale. If you are lacking in pennies then you can pick all the items you love and then wait to be told when you can buy it for cheaper. A photo comes up with each item, as well as its name as it appears on its respective website, although I’ve found that not all of them load or are there. But, the app only launched in August so we can forgive it a couple of teething problems. They also have a website, grabble.com, where you can download the Grab Button, and save items from different websites in to your Grab basket. Pretty damn handy, if you ask me. One review on the app store said ‘if Tinder and Pinterest had a fun fashion baby, Grabble would be it’, which sums it up pretty perfectly. It’s free to purchase and so simple to use, you may as well give it a go - I’m already slightly addicted!
Top five fashion apps Polyvore:
With its chic, monochrome design, Polyvore makes creating the outfits you desire super easy. Clothing is categorised under helpful headings, such as ‘burgundy clutches’, making finding the items you desire easy. The app also gives each item a price tag and tells you where to purchase it from, very handy.
ASOS:
Already infamous for delivering ‘that dress’ for ‘that party’ a mere few hours before, ASOS have stepped in up a notch with potentially the most lethal app. Its simple design makes it easy to navigate around, and with that ‘buy’ box being so large, it is hard to resist tapping and going for the purchase.
Pinterest:
With Halloween fast approaching everyone is desperate for outfit inspiration. This is where Pinterest comes into play. Simply search whatever outfit you are looking for into the search bar and hundreds of results appear. Then click on the looks you like and ‘pin’ them, building a collection of outfits under headings you name.
Chic Feed:
Want to be kept up to date with the latest images from the world’s best photographers? Chic Feed exhibits the hottest shots from The Sartorialist, Face Hunter, Jak and Jill and many more.
Lookbook:
Lookbook is at the forefront of fashion apps, exhibiting the most stylish people from all around the world in one place. The news feed is constantly refreshed and updated with the latest images, and the comments from other users always make for an interesting read.
Walk into the world of Terry de Havilland The Fashion Editors take us to the opening of Terry de Havilland’s Jesmond store and delve into the life of one of the world’s most influential footwear designers
K
ate Moss, Amy Winehouse and Daisy Lowe are but a few of the famous names on Terry de Havilland’s list of clients, and after visiting his store in Jesmond, it’s easy to see why. Terry de Havilland’s booming career started in 1964 after a pair of shoes he’d designed for his model girlfriend were spotted during a shoot and stocked in a King’s Road boutique. After being featured in Queen magazine during the same year, Terry’s designs became an instant success. The shoes lining the shelves of the Jesmond store were adorned in brightly coloured snakeskin, with each tier of Terry’s famous towering platform a different shade. The electric colours of the snakeskin first came about in 1969 after taking LSD became a part of Terry’s design process.
In 1972 a Terry de Havilland store was opened on the King’s Road named ‘Cobblers to the World’. The brand was thriving with shoes being sold across the globe and footwear being designed for famous figures, including Tim Curry’s shoes for The Rocky Horror Show. His rock ‘n’ roll lifestyle and outrageous drugfuelled parties came to an end in 1979 when the company went into liquidation. Since then Terry has designed footwear dedicated to the Punk movement, platforms laced with spikes, studs and skulls. The fetish market also saw Terry de Havilland designs and his trademark platform became a hit with clubbers in the ‘90s.
“That’s exactly what I am. I always was. The rock ‘n’ roll cobbler” After years of experimentation, liquidation and debauchery a determined Terry de Havilland continues to design shoes for some of the world’s most influential women. The Jesmond store boasted an incredible collection of towering wedges, elegant heels, electric prints and remakes of his ‘70s classics, including the Margaux wedge and shoes recently featured in the Anna Sui A/W ‘14 campaign. The environment couldn’t have been more perfect for the ultimate shopping experience, there’s something special about browsing shelves lined with beautiful shoes, a glass of bubbly in hand. Terry de Havilland’s Jesmond store is located on Clayton Road and boasts his main line collection as well as samples exclusive to the North East.
Thrift shop throwdown
Phoebe-Claire Bower and Maeve McKeivor raid Newcastle’s charity shops to create a creepy costume without breaking the bank
E
ver since attending university became fashionable and “the thing” to do once Sixth Form or College were complete, being a student has become synonymous with the phrase, “financially stingy”. Although your Student Loan may have carried you through the first couple of weeks on a cloud of Rich Bitch bliss, where Topshop suddenly became a place you frequented, and Hollister decorated your wardrobe from left to right, eventually affording food, drink and your TV License became that little more important. Saving = Priority. This is where charity shops come in. Newcastle’s Oxfam was where I began my search. Entering with NO IDEA of what you want to buy is the best way to go into a charity shop. As the inventory is donated, the only tip I have for charity shop-hopping is that you go without looking for something specific. This is the costume I created for Halloween, a jungle cat. A fairly easy costume to create, I would strongly advise anyone looking for something quick and simple to take up this get-up! All you need is some fur, leopard print and ears. This dress is a must have item, spotted on a hanger near the door. With a stylish cut designed to accentuate the waist, modest length to show off the wearer’s legs and an exotic print that screams feline, it was perfect for my jungle cat look. At only £4.99, it was a bargain. These ears were a great find, although initially bear ears from Pudsey 2013 (with a multi-coloured bow that had to be removed), they were just £1.50. Contributing beautifully to the final look was a faux fur gilet from New Look and a pair of chunky heels from Primark. However, if I had been able to fit into them, I would have worn these funky ankle boots, for only £6.99! Complete the outfit with a dash of eyeliner to the nose and cheeks, and BANG! You’re a bona fide jungle cat.
I
t is close to that time of year again, where the price of fake blood, latex masks, prosthetic teeth and face paint inflates drastically. As the Halloween weekend draws near, students find themselves queuing relentlessly for hours outside fancy dress shops, in an attempt to buy their costumes. However, not only are the choices of Halloween costumes limited in these fancy dress shops, offering outfits such as zombie school girl, grim reaper and ghost bride, but these costumes are often one hit wonders, and effectively temporary throw away garments, which come Monday morning will be long forgotten, discarded and unwanted. Within the U.K around 1.5 to 2 million tonnes of clothing and textile waste is created each year, of which a startling 1.2 million tonnes is disposed to landfill. A step towards decreasing these statistics can be done this Halloween by making use of already existing pieces as opposed to buying pre-made costumes. This year instead of going for the gory gruesome getup, I decided to bring the colorful, cosmic spangles back to Halloween, where glitter once replaced fake blood and latex wounds. For my cosmic jester costume, I collected several preloved items from charity shops and markets across Newcastle. These striped leggings are originally thermal long johns retailing at £3.50 from the PDSA charity shop. The orange and black checkered bodycon dress, cost £5.00 from the British Heart Foundation, and the hat and jester collar are made out of fabric from a market, up cycled by being sewn together. The whole outfit cost less than £10, and is not only original and imaginative but supports the notion of sustainable fashion. I’ll be time warping in this little number down at SoulJam’s ‘Dead Disco’ Halloween Party, at World Head Quarters on Thursday 30th of October, notorious for its authentic boogie, soul, Motown, Northern Funk, Disco and RnB.
The Courier
fashion.17
Monday 27th October 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk/fashion Instagram:@thecourierfashion | Facebook: facebook.com/thecourierfash |Email: c2.fashion@ncl.ac.uk |
Behind the scenes
Fashion Editor Hannah Fitton heads into Jesmond Dene to meet the faces behind the Halloween photoshoot
A
midst the serial joggers, yummy mummies and the fourteen year olds skipping school you could find our fashion editor Hannah Goldstein, ever looking the pro with her black baseball cap on, directing the Halloween shoot in Jesmond Dene. Sprawled against the mossy rocks of the Dene lay Tessa Jones, third year Ancient History student, clad in an exquisite black silk suit from Mango, gas mask strapped to face. Next to her stood James Murphy, third year Politics student, similarly wearing a black suit, but with a black polo neck jumper
underneath and paired with Doc Martens. Ellen Wilson, special effects makeup pro, painted James’ face to create a gruesome look in an impressive 15 minutes, with each of us trying to register each step in a false hope of being able to re-create it for ourselves. Once immersed in the shoot we didn’t notice the intrigued glances at James from the passers by. At one point James was stood alone on a bridge in the Dene, when a young family strolled past and stared at James’ face jokingly asking “Is it real?”, to which he responded with a calm “Yes”. A rather awkward situation, until he pointed towards the photographer shooting the two angels. Si Richardson was our photographer. Based in Newcastle he is known for his dystopian style. Si’s favourite shot was the one of the two angels stood next to the waterfall: “It was a shot I had mentally prepared before starting, but a little touch, as simple as Hannah Goldstein suggesting that the girls hold hands, elevated the image to something far
more powerful that I had even hoped.” Sara Macauley, second year Media student, was our other model. To create the shot we had both Sara and Tessa go barefoot and stand upon the slippery stone of the waterfall. Visually, this looked amazing but their frozen feet told a different story. The wings, the gas mask and the rabbit mask were all very kindly lent to us by Magic Box, the fancy dress retailer. Hannah said that, “I enjoyed styling James’ rabbit look the most, because the mask allowed for more whimsicality. In contrast to the other all-black ensembles, I wanted this outfit to play with different patterns and add a splash of colour to the spread. Rather than create a gothic, dark outfit, I wanted this outfit to contrast the horrific nature of the mask by being composed and playful. This is also why the poses are unobtrusive, the juxtaposition of the humanness of the body with the mask creating the uncanny”.
Spooky inspiration
Emily King looks to these unlikely characters for Halloween costume inspiration
H
alloween is once again upon us, along with the need to purchase a fancy dress outfit to top last year’s offering: a whoopie cushion in my case (she says proudly). Well, don’t you worry just yet folks. Before you go crazy with white face paint and fake blood, let’s take a look at some of the more quirky options you can create on a budget…
Velma
For anyone suffering from overspending of their loan already or those simply just too lazy, have no fear, Velma is here. You wouldn’t think geeky Velma would have much to offer, but costume wise she’s a simple yet surprisingly over-looked choice. Maybe it’s all that orange. Regardless, it’s time to embrace winter with the turtle neck, skirt and long stockings combo – all in varying shades of yes, you guessed it, orange.
Jaws
Photography: www.sirichardsonphotography.com Make-up Artist: www.facebook.com/Nelle.mua Props: www.magicboxfancydress.com
A Sim
Photoshoot: g get et the look
Fashion Editor Amy O’Rourke shows us how to take the scary out of Halloween fashion Topsho p
n ma Top
Here’s one for the guys: directly from Steven Spielberg’s classic Jaws. Again simplicity is the key to success here. No need to worry about intricacy, detail, or even comfort come to that. Good old reliable Jaws (is that the shark’s name?!) might be the way forward. Costume-wise, think pigeon greys and blood curdling reds. Or, you know, nip down to Primark for a shark onesie.
We’ve all been stood in front of the wardrobe on Halloween after leaving it to late to buy a costume, staring aimlessly into an endless flow of pretty dresses and floaty tops. This costume gives you the chance to win this battle and go completely nude. Well, as this would be slightly inappropriate, take tips from your favourite childhood game, The Sims, and use small nude coloured cardboard squares stuck together to create the illusion of a pixalated blur. Create the classic green diamond using a headband and yet more cardboard, then you’re good to go.
Margot Tenenbaum
For those who really can’t be bothered to raid the fancy dress shops this year, go for Margot Tenenbaum as your Halloween inspiration. This look is extremely easy. Simply load on the black eyeliner (and I mean load), throw on that fur coat that’s been lingering in the back of your wardrobe and stand in a corner, looking cynical, smoking.
Alice Cooper Monsoon
Topma n
Dressing as a heavy metal entertainer is easy, and cheap. Smother your eyes in a smouldering black eye shadow, creating a sunshine like shape. Back comb your hair into oblivion, creating an almost birds nest illusion. Top hat, black blazer and layer upon layer of black clothes make for the perfect rock star costume, just remember to grimace at everyone that crosses your path.
18.fashionphotoshoot
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Darkness in the Dene
The Courier
Monday 27 October 2014
fashionphotoshoot.19
Photography; www.sirichardsonphotography.com Si is available for freelance work Makeup: www.facebook.com/nelle.mua Props: www.magicboxfancydress.com
20.beauty
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Beauty Editors: Charlotte Davies and Charlotte Maxwell Online Editor: Kathy Davidson
Blokey beauty:
Facial Hair
How to: Rocky Horror
Here are four easy-to-achieve looks from our all time favourite: The Rocky Horror Picture Show
Ellen Walker as Magenta
Michael Onoba talks us through how he solved his facial hair co- nundrum and channelled his inner Mufasa
L
ions have a mane and they’re the kings of the jungle. Logically therefore it should be very obvious that as men we must also maintain a regal mane in order to take our rightful place in the food chain. Even Rafiki (magic monkey in Lion King) had a beard and he could do magic, do you want to do magic? Unlike Lions though, we are empowered by choice and this is something to celebrate. I’ve seen The Lion King a grand total of twice, give or take fifteen times. From Simba to Mufasa to Scar they all seem to be sporting the same facial hair style. However, we have facial hair liberation and are free to do as we please with our manes so take advantage. You could decide to grow a beard so majestic that whenever you birth a son there’s always a high chance that he’ll grow up to be king after several hardships including having to run away after seeing you get trampled by a fleeing herd of antelope - you will still be able to give him advice from heaven during his exile, though, so no worries. You could also decide to go shaven, leave nothing to the imagination, show that strong jawline and tell the world “this is I”. There’s also everything in between. No one style is better than the other and what facial hairstyle suits you best is entirely personal choice; no man should really be dictated on how to wear his face crown. The major factor in determining the best style for you is your face shape and general facial features. Smaller facial features tend to be better complimented by more understated facial hair styles whilst bigger facial features lend themselves better to bushier beard styles. Facial hair can be used to accentuate features or complement them.
Using a face sponge start with a white base. From here opt for a blue based colour to then darken the natural contours of your face.
In the same way with a heavy hand, darken the eye sockets. Emphasize this, through thick liner and lashes.
Finish off a rough red lip (not one for the perfectionists). And finally, go crazy with the backcombing. The bigger the better.
Gered Gergo as Riff Raff
Begin with a heavy white base covering the entire face and lips. Next take a dark blue colour and emphasize the natural contours of the face.
Darken the eye-sockets with a heavy hand. Graduate the edges of the sockets with a purple hue.
And of course, Riff Raff would not be complete with the bald cap and blonde wig ensemble.
This time, when contouring opt for a vibrant pink. Use the same colour pink to create an alternative smokey eye effect.
To complete the look, smooth the hair over to one side and cross pin leaving no fly aways.
Beth Watt as Columbia
“A good razor is to a man what Timon is to Pumba a friend”
For example, a smaller mouth can be emboldened if so desired by slightly growing a moustache just over the corners of the mouth. A large nose can work in tandem with a bushy beard or stache. A more angular face is better suited to a 5 o’clock shadow whilst a circular face works best with thinner but more defined lines. Ultimately, variety is the spice of life and what works best for one person is not necessarily the same as what works for another and experimentation is needed and indeed advised. However, experimentation means that sound shaving technique and equipment must be employed. A good razor, both electric and otherwise, is to a man what Timon is to Pumba, a friend. Though there are many great ones out there for a student like myself looking for reasonable pricing while maintaining effectiveness I’d recommend a Babyliss For Men grooming kit, simple, effective and cost effective. Also ensure the blade is never dull as that could lead to problems such as shaving rash. Additionally, ensure the beard is soft and wet prior to shaving such as right after a shower. You’ll need a shaving cream or foam that creates a nice lather as opposed to just foam prior to shaving, I’d recommend Dove Men+ Care shaving foam. After shaving and rinsing the face with warm water a good after shave is important and should not be ignored as it moisturizes and clears away dead skin from shaving. Finally, go out, explore and try new facial hair styles, be Simba, be man, be King. Don’t let us down.
Again, cover the entire face with a white base, this time paying close attention to disguise the eyebrows. Once they’ve disappeared you can draw on some new, much thinner and higher arches.
David Leighton as Frank-n-Furter
Begin by covering the face with a white base. Again, opt for a vibrant pink to emphasise the natural contours of the face. However this time blend outwards.
Thick eyebrows and OTT metallic blue eyes are essential for this look. Intensify this with black liner and lashings of mascara.
Now for the staple Frank-n-Furter red lip and black wig combo. And don’t forget to finish off with some seductive lip liner boys; this isn’t a look for the faint-hearted.
All face paint was done by Nina Hunter. Find her on Facebook under Nina Hunter Facepainter or on Twitter @NinaFACEPAINTER
The Courier
beauty.21
Monday 27 October 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk/beauty Instagram @courier_beauty | Twitter @CourierBeauty
Meet the blogger
Tessa Jones meets fashion, beauty and lifestyle blogger Maria Case to have a chat about all things bloggy friend” in this digital age, and since there’s nothing worse than “poorly shot, grainy, bad quality photographs”, she suggests you try to get your hands on a good quality DSLR camera. Maria cites actress Rosamund Pike amongst her
“Don’t freak out over the little details - it’s just so important to push yourself to get started”
I
met with Maria Case, a student blogger covering beauty, fashion and lifestyle in the North East in a ‘fun, insightful and exciting’ style. She was inspired to start her blog in May because she felt she needed an online presence to help her planned career in fashion journalism, although she was intimidated by the idea of blogging because she thought she “needed to be an expert to write about fashion and beauty” but now she realises that’s not true. Maria likes to keep her blog varied, and loves the event invitations it has brought, such as Newcastle Fashion Week which coincided with her blog launch and was “a great spring board”. When starting up she found it difficult to constantly think up new ideas for posts. This lead to her taking a break over summer so she wasn’t “compromising the quality of content just for the sake of posting something”, which is a reflection of her integrity at staying true to her initial plan. For those of you thinking about starting your own blog, Maria’s most important piece of advice would be to go straight to Blogspot or Wordpress and just get creating. She suggests “don’t freak out over the little details - you don’t need a fancy name, but it’s so important to push yourself to get started”. She found YouTube tutorials very handy for teaching herself about HTML coding and all the other technical bits. Twitter has been a great promotional tool for Maria, as “hashtags are your best
biggest inspirations, due to her light, neutral makeup letting natural beauty shine through. If you’re looking for a quick change-up in your look, Maria “adores” lipstick and thinks “trying out a shade that’s really different to what you normally go for” can give you just that. Maria personally likes to wear mauve and plum shades to match her dark hair and eyes, but lighter shades such as pinks and orange-reds may be more suited to lighter hair. With Halloween approaching, I asked Maria about her biggest beauty horrors, and it turns out
the blogger had quite a few stories to tell. Until she was 17, Maria never plucked her eyebrows, which she now thinks looked “awful” in photographs. But since we’re still in the Cara-era of big and bushy, I think she could get away with putting less effort in now. Maria hates make up that “looks like I’ve tried really hard”, so there’s a big regret in the multitude of light, shimmery eye shadows she used to don, hence her current penchant for more natural and matte shades. A beauty disaster I can personally relate to is the full fringe she experimented with and ultimately decided was just a “terrible idea” as it didn’t suit her facial features. On the topic of fringes, one beauty tip that Maria would give to a celebrity is urging Beyoncé to hastily get rid of the micro fringe she has been sporting recently - “I mean, I love her, but that fringe is really quite bad”. From her engaging blog and the subtle yet beautiful looks she wears, I’d say Maria is one to keep up with for all your Newcastle beauty needs.
Lucy Cochrane visited Boiler House, Jesmond for the ultimate cut and blow dry
O
carried out with complete precision by a very attentive stylist who made sure the cut was executed perfectly. I had a choice of how my hair was blown and decided on a curly one for a bouncy finish. After applying some Paul Mitchell styling cream, my hair was given a volumizing blow dry complete with GHD curls for added texture, and then sprayed for extra hold. My hair even kept its bounce the next day which is a true testament to a good blow dry! Upon leaving, Molly kindly gave me some complimentary sample hair products to test out from Schwarzkopf, two glossy holdsprays, as I had expressed a passion for reviewing products and blogging. I had a look around the upstairs at the treatment rooms and would be further interested in trying out some of their beauty treatments, which I am sure will be just as impressive. Overall, I really enjoyed the entire Boiler House experience from its super professional cut, to its accommodating stylists and the charming décor which is different to any other salon experience I’ve had. I usually just get my hair cut when I visit home at my familiar salon, but I would gladly choose Boiler House in the future. Boiler House is situated on Acorn Road in West Jesmond. They offer a variety of hair and beauty services; student discount is available Monday- Wednesday. For more information, contact them on 0191 281 2348
Ellen Walker takes a look at MAC’s newest collection
M
AC Cosmetics are renowned in the makeup industry for their incredibly original and artistic Halloween makeup collections. Last year’s monster mayhem inspired collaboration with Rick Baker was fabulous, with graphic skulls and Frankensteinesque gore to please even the most outrageous Halloween fanatics.
For more of Mariah’s lifestyle, fashion and beauty tips, head over to her blog maria-case.blogspot. co.uk
I know this great little salon n Friday, I ventured into Boiler House salon in Jesmond for a complimentary cut and blow dry. This salon experience would usually cost around £45, so it’s safe to say I had high hopes, which were by no means disappointed. The first thing you are greeted with is the unusual mix of décor, certainly different from a typical salon feel with often minimalist interior which can feel quite clinical. Boiler House, however, is bursting with vitality and has very charming aesthetics such as old theatre chairs and croc print hairdressing chairs, not to mention the huge clock on the first floor which formally belonged to a train station. These quirky elements are combined with opulent chandeliers and elaborate chairs which creates a very trendy vibe. You will certainly not run out of things to catch your eye whilst enjoying the haircut that’s for sure. My hairdresser, Molly, was especially friendly and provided a thorough consultation before my hair was washed, in which we discussed how much I wanted cut off and any layers to be cut in etc. My hair was then washed with wonderfully fragrant Paul Mitchell products and given a conditioning massage which was so relaxing it almost sent me to sleep. My hair was then towel dried, combed through and sectioned ready to be cut. I got around 3 inches off the length to tidy things up and had some shorter layers blended into the front of my hair to add some shape. This was all
MAC Rocky Horror
For 2014, MAC has thrown us back to the 70’s with a Rocky Horror Picture Show themed collection, complete with hints of all your favourite characters’ looks, to celebrate the 40th birthday of the world-class show. MAC has fused together all the most distinctive features and inky hue’s of the most iconic characters to create a gory new collection, perfect both for inventing your own spooky Halloween look and for an edgy addition to your every day make up. Gothic purples and smokey shades are contrasted with vibrant reds and gold shimmery pigments to give us an all round representation of both the theatrical glitz and glamour of the stage show as well as its dark, unearthly themes. The Rocky Horror pigment and glitter pots are ideal for adding sophisticated edge to any make up look and although the prices may seem pretty steep, these pots will last for eternity. My personal favourite product in the collection is the Greasepaint stick which comes in ‘Black’ and ‘B’ (a hazy blue-grey colour). This easy to use product is a genius twist on eyeliner; it’s extremely pigmented and thick, enabling effortless smudging into an intense, rich layer of eye shadow in a matter of seconds. The entire collection is based around three key characters of the show: Dr. Frank-N-Furter, Columbia and Magenta. Each look has similarities: an extremely pale complexion, luscious crimson lips and dramatic dark eye makeup; however, each has a slight difference. For example, Dr. Frank-NFurter’s iconic eyebrows take centre stage in his look, enhanced by an intense coverage of ‘Heavy’, ‘Black’ and ‘Pendulous’ eye shadows from the Riff-Taff quad, which doubles up as the perfect tool to create a glamorous smokey eye look. The eyes are completed with a thick dramatically winged black liquid liner. ‘Bone Beige’ Sculpting Powder is used to sculpt the iconic, gaunt cheekbones, which are topped off with heavily applied ‘Crazed Imagination’ powder blush. ‘Vino’ lip pencil and ‘Oblivion’ lipstick are used to create gruesome blood-red lips, which will stay looking freshly applied all night long. MAC’s interpretation of the characters’ makeup is an incredibly helpful guide and source of inspiration, however, the vast range of products in the collection allows you to really do your own thing and be creative this
22.arts
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Arts Editors: Lucy Chenery and Becka Crawshaw Online Arts Editor: Jess Harman
The knives are out
Alice Fishman experiments with pumpkin carving
T
Holly Argent explores the connection between art and the uncanny
G
alleries don’t tend to curate their shows around public holidays, but as Halloween is just around the corner it got me thinking about how some art can genuinely make you feel uneasy and frightened. We know art is a construct in one way or another but it doesn’t mean we encounter it as completely artificial or in any lesser emotional sense. So what connects that fear (if you’re doing Halloween properly) of those people dressed up as creepy clowns or little scary girls *flashback from The Shining* with that of looking at art in a gallery? Certain things we look at seem familiar yet alien at the same time and this uncomfortable, contradictory sensation we experience is one some artists have used to manipulate our reaction in the gallery. This idea of the ‘uncanny’ manifests out of witnessing or experiencing something outside of our knowledge or perception that strangely paradoxically seems recognisable or familiar. In terms of psychology cognitive dissonance: holding two opposing ideas in the mind at the same time stimulates mental stress and creates an air of discomfort in the viewer. The term, coined by Sigmund Freud in the essay ‘The Uncanny’ (1919), has been utilised by the like of Sarah Lucas, Cindy Sherman and Mike Nelson (installations like Coral Reef). Cindy Sherman in her Sex pictures (1993) uses mannequins and prosthetics as stand-ins for humans or herself. Combatting traditional images of the body and sexuality, these effigies are imitations of human life. Mannequins and dolls - being standardized replicas of the body - deny individuality and even life. They are essentially dead.
“This idea of the ‘uncanny’ manifests out of witnessing something outside of our perception that strangely seems recognisable” You might’ve seen Repliee Q2 in the news - an uncannily life-like robot, developed by roboticists at Osaka University that can mimic human functions; blinking, breathing and speaking and even process speech, pretty weird huh? The sculptures in the 1993 exhibition Sonsbeek 93 curated by Valerie Smith are not far off that of Repliee Q2. The artist Mike Kelley (though not quite as technologically advanced as those Japanese inventors) presented a book titled The Uncanny to go with the show. Using this as a basis for the 2004 Tate Liverpool exhibition of the same title, the starkness of the white cube context was used to explore horror, violence and idolatry through a collection of things Kelley found ‘creepy’. Taking full advantage of the gallery as a blank, almost serene environment it only emphasises the strangeness of the following scenes. The most frightening of all is a whole room emulating that of a horror film set: including ‘decomposed limbs, Damien Hirst taxidermy, a film of Marcel Broodthaers interviewing Jeremy Bentham’s stuffed corpse and…several wax models of pox-ridden female pelvises’ exploring where psychology meets art as well as pushing the boundaries of curation. So don’t wait until Halloween to get freaked out, go to a gallery. Illustration: Holly Argent
he carved pumpkins or ‘jack o lanterns’ often seen dotted around doorsteps on Halloween have been a tradition long before the creation of modern Halloween in the United States. The practise is said to have originated in Scotland and Ireland in the 19th century, where they were carved in the shape of spirits and goblins to scare away fairies that were seen as particularly active from the 31st of October to the 1st of November. To frighten off these fearsome fairies, turnips and mangelwurzels (not an ingredient from a Harry Potter potion class, a root vegetable) were used for carving. Thankfully when Scottish and Irish immigrants crossed the Atlantic, they discovered the rather more delicious pumpkin, already a wellestablished symbol of the American harvest in October, to create their jack o lanterns. Another, more sinister, explanation of the origins of the jack o lantern lay in the Irish myth of ‘Stinky Jack’. Jack was a thief and a liar who tricked the devil into a tree and trapped him there by drawing a cross on the trunk. Jack let the devil go under the condition that the devil would not bother him for ten years. Soon after, however, Jack died. Due to their previous deal, the devil could not allow Jack into hell, yet due to his sinful life God did not want to allow Jack into heaven. The devil gave Jack a piece of burning coal to light his way through the darkness, which he placed inside a turnip. He has been roaming the earth ever since with his nothing but his turnip lantern, leading to the creation of the name ‘jack o lantern’. With Halloween coming up, I decided to have a go at some creative pumpkin carving to brighten up my doorstep and frighten away the fairies in the gloomy October evenings. I enforced two friends and armed with nothing but a spoon and a vegetable knife, here are our ghoulish creations.
The Cannibal Pumpkin We did this mainly as an excuse to buy an adorable ‘munchkin pumpkin’, who has unfortunately been gobbled up by a murderous bigger pumpkin with a fleeting resemblance to Voldemort.
The Cheeky Pumpkin
This poor pumpkin is having its fine plump bottom squeezed by a cheeky groper.
Under the covers I
ron Maiden’s Piece of Mind album artwork has always had a reputation for being impressively creepy. The inclusion of the band’s zombie-like mascot, ‘Eddie’, on all their album covers ensures that any Iron Maiden album is immediately recognizable. Each Iron Maiden album artwork features a unique incarnation of Eddie, with all of them portraying the mascot in an undeniably horrific fashion. The aptly titled Piece of Mind is definitely the Iron Maiden album that creeps me out the most. Depicted as a deranged mental patient, Eddie
“Depicted as a deranged mental patient, Iron Maiden’s mascot Eddie looks like he could have walked straight out of a horror film”
“Yesterday and Today marks the first time The Beatles ever came under fire from the press; the cover is pretty twisted” looks like he could have walked straight out of a horror film. Yesterday and Today’s album artwork is really interesting, marking the first time The Beatles ever came under fire from the press. The cover itself is pretty twisted; the members of the band are all merrily posing alongside decapitated baby dolls and pieces of meat. When it was released in 1966, the reaction from US dealers resulted in Capitol Records having to recall all released albums. Whilst a large number were delivered to a landfill, Capitol also opted to simply paste a more acceptable image over the controversial ‘Butcher cover’. The outcry surrounding this album artwork makes
The Poorly Pumpkin This might look like some of us after our Halloween nights out. Simply carve your pumpkin’s eyes to look slightly nauseous and use the seeds you’ll scoop out of the centre to create the vomit.
The Hipster Pumpkin For those who hate a mainstream pumpkin, give yours a fetching handlebar moustache and a pipe to make things a little more edgy. Images: Alice Fishman
Ollie Seymour takes a look at some very creepy album art it undeniable that Yesterday and Today boasts one of the more disturbing covers out there. Whilst I wouldn’t say News of the World is anywhere near as creepy as the above two, there’s definitely something weird about this album. Featuring a giant robot plucking the members of Queen out of an auditorium, this is certainly an image that sticks in your mind for a while. It’s the subtle elements of this album artwork that get to me – from the robot’s confused stare, to the blood dripping from its left hand. News of the World’s songs stick to this creepy theme, with tracks such as ‘Sheer Heart Attack’, and ‘All Dead, All Dead’; the latter could easily be the title of a slasher film.
The Courier
arts.23
Monday 27 October 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk/arts c2.arts@ncl.ac.uk | @CourierArts
A glance at the Gothic Nothing suits this time of year better than a good Gothic novel, but if you should need to blag it in front of friends then use our crib sheet on three classics
Wuthering Heights
T
he heart-wrenching, complex story of Catherine Earnshaw and the brooding byronic hero Heathcliff, set against the backdrop of a society intolerant of change, Wuthering Heights is possibly one of the best novels of all time. Combining elements of the Victorian Gothic with a tale of forbidden romance and psychological torment, the novel is rife with duality; it is set in the Yorkshire moors across the neighbouring estates of the gloomy, unsightly Wuthering Heights and the predominantly cheerier Thrushcross Grange. It is also set across two generations – the Earnshaw family and their successors – as well as the various sub-characters occasionally popping up and adding further to the complexity of the narrative.
“A tale of forbidden romance and psychological torment”
In addition, it is also a story-within-a-story, narrated by both Lockwood, a gentleman renting out Thrushcross Grange during the second generation of characters; and Ellen ‘Nelly’ Dean, a predominant figure in the childhood of Catherine and Heathcliff. Once you get past all the confusion in the initial chapters, it’s an astonishing read. Catherine is a character torn between her passionate nature and the limits imposed upon her by society, unable to come to any kind of compromise between the two. Heathcliff, on the other hand, is a ‘dark skinned gypsy’, adopted – or potentially an illegitimate half-brother – by Catherine’s father and consistently shunned and ill-treated by pretty much everyone except Catherine. Wuthering Heights is a cornerstone of English literature through the ages, beautifully written and wonderfully complex. Ellie McLaren
Jane Eyre
J
ane Eyre, a bildungsroman novel, follows the eponymous Jane as she develops from a childhood to adulthood. A blend of Romance, Gothic mystery and a coming-of-age story, Charlotte Brontë writes an intriguing novel in vivid and beautiful prose. The horror elements of the novel are revealed by Brontë so elusively you could easily miss them. The mystery and suspense are provide a well-crafted eerie atmosphere, although sometimes it feels as if these Gothic elements were inserted due to the fashion of the time.
“The horror elements of the novel are revealed by Brontë so elusively you could easily miss them ”
If anything, the horror aspects are at their most intense when Brontë explores the character of Bertha Mason – the clandestine wife of Rochester who is hidden in the attic of Thornfield. This comes to a height when Bertha stabs her brother in the attempt to expose herself and get back at Rochester for his barbaric treatment of her. Apart from this, though, there are little moments of horror. So don’t put your expectations too high for this side of things in Jane Eyre. Do expect to fall
in love with Jane and become attached to her. She is worthy as a titular protagonist in the fact that she is engaging, independent, intelligent and a torch bearer for feminism. Despite the injustices that befall her, she picks herself up and learns from her experiences. She is unwavering in her moral standing, although sometimes this can come across as moral preaching. Overall Jane Eyre is an essential for the classic literature and romance fan. Rhian Hunter
Frankenstein
W
hen you’ve been thinking of your Halloween costume this year, I bet that Frankenstein’s monster crossed your mind at least once. And it’s understandable why. Mary Shelley’s depiction of the creature made of dead body parts is a gruesome reading, but what makes Frankenstein such a frightful Gothic novel, for me anyway, is the monstrous actions of Frankenstein himself.
“Who would ever think a 7 foot giant made up of dead limbs would be so loveable?” Sure, all the stereotypical gothic tropes are there: we’ve got the lightning flashes, the derelict buildings, the supernatural and the strange. But they’re really just there for show – they don’t add anything to the narrative, or scare the reader. The ‘monster’ that Frankenstein creates is shown to be a caring, intelligent being – he reads Dante for God’s sake. The same can’t be said for his maker, however. Victor Frankenstein, Shelley’s protagonist, is a horrible human being. He encapsulates all that is bad with society and hides it under a privileged middle-class exterior. I think that the aspect of the narrative that makes this novel so interesting to read is the continuous links made between Victor and his creation, aiding the suggestion that the ‘monster’ is a physical embodiment of Victor’s internal being – his soul, if you like. It’s not a difficult leap to make either, when you read how awfully he treats his family, his future wife, and his ‘child’ (that is, the creature). Shelley’s Frankenstein may not be what you expect from the gothic genre, but it will make you question absolutely everything in your life. Who would ever think a 7 foot giant made up of dead limbs would be so lovable?
Reviews:
Good Timing
G
ood Timing is a one-man show written and performed by Ian McLaughlin, based on the discovery of his father and the similarities he found to his own life. As the programme states, Good Timing is “part personal testimony, part stand-up and part science”, although a better description might be part standup, part heart-wrenching drama and part doctor who references. McLaughlin started off by introducing himself and making a farce of the classic introductory spiel that usually starts off true personal stories, which began the night brilliantly and served to relax the audience. He then went further into depth, and while in reality he was simply providing background exposition, he simultaneously entertained and engaged the crowd.
“Part stand-up, part heartwrenching drama and part Doctor Who references” He took us travelling through time with a toy Tardis, Tom Baker and a giraffe, taking us through the events that led him to discovering his father had died only a few months prior to finding him. He ended the night with a smile and a meeting with his younger self, with Finn Burridge making his theatre debut playing the younger version of McLaughlin. The two played together well, finishing the play in a touching and amusing manner. Good Timing was an excellent spattering of pure unadultered laughter and truly emotional moments, and McLaughlin carried each extreme perfectly. Despite the somewhat morbid subject matter, the performance was lifted into greatness by McLaughlin’s talent as a comedian; good timings indeed. Sophie Baines
Henry IV
H
enry IV parts I and II have been ranked among Shakespeare’s greatest plays by critics, and so new productions have always been eagerly anticipated. On this occasion, the Royal Shakespeare Company did not disappoint. With his crown under threat, part I sees King Henry IV, new to the throne and struggling with a conscience marred by his deposition of Richard II, overcome a rebellion against him. Despite what the title may suggest, Henry IV becomes a sideshow to the much more enticing Prince Harry, the future Henry V, played by the excellent Alex Hassell. Somewhat inevitably, he is far more beguiling when going through his debauched stage in the first half, but still creates interest and poignancy as he gradually matures to the person who will one day become a great king.
“Falstaff ’s fall from grace helps us to forgive his selfcentred ways”
As is to be expected, however, it is Anthony Sher’s Falstaff that steals the show. Endearing us to him almost immediately, Sher emphasises Falstaff ’s aristocratic roots, which adds comedy to his already witty lines while on a deeper level emphasises his fall from grace, helping us to forgive his self-centred ways. The only real low point of the play was Lady Percy, played by Jennifer Kirby, who was dull and lacklustre in her position as the virtuous and suffering wife of Trevor White’s fiery Harry Hotspur. Perhaps this can be forgiven, however, in a play that has so many other rich characters to engage with. It was certainly a delight to watch, and with student tickets costing only £5, the Theatre Royal is on to a winner. Laura Barron
24.tvhighlights
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
TV Editors: Helen Daly and Ellie McLaren Online TV Editor: Rebecca Dooley
I can’t even In this week’s I Can’t Even, Lau- ren Hickin shares her opinions on the love triangle trope in TV WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD
A
h, the love triangle. As with so many television tropes, it’s easy to see that the love triangle did originally have a purpose: to create drama, delaying the central couple in reaching their satisfying but boring happy ending. However, they have now become so ubiquitous that it’s hard to find a programme that hasn’t included one. I used to like love triangles. Even to this day, I hold a place in my heart for such love-triangleresultant couples as Chuck and Blair and Jess and Rory (Dean who?). But the fact remains that love triangles have become boring and predictable because the formula has been done so many times. The dilemma of the “safe” choice versus the “exciting” choice has been exhausted (Rory/Jess/Dean on Gilmore Girls, Blair/Nate/Chuck on Gossip Girl), as has the overlooked friend versus the brooding newcomer (Danaerys/Jorah/Daario on Game of Thrones). Some recent programmes, particularly American imports such as The 100 and Reign, can’t content themselves with one love triangle. Both seem to have a new combination of hapless lovers every week, switching jealousies and affections faster than the players in a Shakespearean comedy.
The Walking Dead Fox(UK), Monday, 9pm
I
always know a show is worth recommending when the credits roll and I’m left screaming obscenities at my laptop and wondering how I’m going to get through the next week. This was the case with the return of The Walking Dead. For anyone who has been living under a rock or can’t afford a TV license, here’s a quick recap: The Walking Dead follows Rick Grimes, his family and friends, and people who are, trekking through zombie infested America looking for survivors/a cure/a safe haven. Though some would rather become a zombie than watch yet another zombie series, The Walking Dead focuses on the people who are left alive; it is their characters and their sense of morality which sets the show apart from the rest. The first episode came as a welcome departure
from the previous series, which for the most part consisted of Rick and co. sitting in the dark, waiting for the apocalypse to blow over. The sudden surge of action allowed us to be thrown back into the world of The Walking Dead as if we’d never said goodbye, which was a significant improvement on the slow and drawn out beginning of the last season. Though the tension throughout the episode was generally well handled, the suspense in the butchering scene did slightly beggar belief -after the second time Glenn escaped being knocked out it was obvious he was keeping his throat. The sub-plot was also, surprisingly, just as excit-
“The sudden surge of action allowed us to be thrown back into the world of The Walking Dead as if we’d never said goodbye”
ing. Switching between stories can be frustrating, especially when great characters are facing life or death, and others are toasting marshmallows. Judith is a fantastic character; little would be lost plot-wise if she died, but she pulls on our heartstrings just enough to inspire panic, resulting in fantastic tension. Tyreese and Carol’s reluctance to shoot the member of Terminus was slightly odd, however. Judith’s vulnerability, and the fact that Martin presented far too great a risk to invite into the group or release, the protagonist’s lack of decisive action was slightly out of character. Although not without its problems, ‘No Sanctuary’ boasted excellent storylines and decent pacing. It’s refreshing to move on from a location so quickly whilst letting some plot lines dangle; Beth’s absence at Terminus hung over the final reunion scene, promising more conflict to come. Overall, an incredibly strong start from The Walking Dead. ‘No Sanctuary’ will certainly be hard to beat. Rebecca Harrison
“It was the embarrassingly obvious and formulaic love triangle that cemented my hatewatching” Not that it’s any less exhausting when a love triangle is dragged on for season after season. Much as I loved True Blood, I did find myself getting heartily sick of the Sookie/Bill/Eric dynamic, a love triangle which stretched over almost six of the show’s seven seasons. Whilst in every way infinitely superior to that other vampire phenomenon involving a love triangle the repeated reduction of True Blood’s female protagonist to which morally dubious immortal she was going to be with forever (read: the next few episodes) always felt like lazy plotting. In fact, one of the greatest strengths of the season finale was the moment when Sookie symbolically freed herself from being defined by her relationships by staking Bill, her first love, rather than sacrificing her own powers. After years of supernatural shenanigans and enough blood to fill an Olympic pool, the series’ last scene showed Sookie in a reassuringly domestic setting, hosting a dinner and pregnant (something which would have been impossible with either of her undead suitors). More recently, the love triangle was employed rather more shoddily in new British series, Our Girl. I had several problems with this programme, beginning with the fact that their protagonist, a female soldier, cried in every episode (with only one of the male characters ever tearing up). However, it was the embarrassingly formulaic love triangle that cemented my hate-watching. Of course it’s a squaddie and an officer. Of course she had sex with the working-class one but is actually in love with the posh one. Of course the one she overlooks is the one who really cares, while the one she’s been fruitlessly staring at since episode one magically falls in love with her at the eleventh hour after the obligatory treating-her-like-an-idiot-so-she-knows-herplace. Needless to say, I was not impressed.
Continue the debate online: thecourieronline.co.uk/tv
Vampire Diaries
W
here are Damon and Bonnie? That was the question we were asking ourselves at the end of the last (admittedly lacklustre) season of The Vampire Diaries. As our heroes found themselves trapped in The Other Side just as it collapsed and ceased to exist, they were seemingly sucked into oblivion. Surely they wouldn’t kill fan favourite Damon? We find the rest of the gang unable to return home to Mystic Falls after those pesky Travellers put a ‘No-Supernaturals-Allowed’ spell on the place; and not all of them are handling it well. Caroline’s dropped out of college, Tyler is struggling with his rediscovered anger, Jeremy’s kissing anything with a pulse and Matt is… well, still Matt. However, they’re hoping that as Stefan’s disappeared, he’s searching for a way to get Bonnie and his brother back; they’re going to be bitterly disappointed. And what’s this? Elena is perfectly happy and seemingly unaffected by the deaths of her boyfriend and BFF? Let’s just say she’s not coping at all. We also see the return of the lovely Alaric, whose shock reappearance was a nice surprise in the season finale. Joining him is the mischievous Enzo, who was by far one of the highlights of season five, so kudos for keeping him around. The Vampire Diaries is strongest when it deals with the characters themselves rather than the increasingly messy mythology of the show. While the main problem last season was the apparent lack of direction, this year already looks to be dealing with the heroes’ new circumstances in an interesting way. And so the question remains; where are Damon and Bonnie? Anyone for pancakes? Chloe Carroll
Agents of Shield
Scorpion
ITV, Thursday, 9pm
Channel 4, Friday, 8pm
M
arvel’s Agents of Shield premiered its first season to over twelve million viewers and, after a season that inspired no one, opened its second to only six million. Though the first half of the season one was received as mostly boring, with acting considered stiff and a cast nobody really cared about (we wanted to see actual Marvel characters…not Skye!); I for one was a little excited at the prospect of the second, Marvel tend to get most things right, eventually. Season two kicks off with S.H.I.E.L.D having been disbanded (see end of Captain America: The Winter Soldier & previous episodes of AoS) with Coulson (Gregg Clark) and the gang having to go rogue. The new director, Coulson, is charged with re-building his organisation from the ground up but there are one or two hitches, they have no resources and half their agents turned out to be baddies. The team is sent to retrieve the ‘obelisk’, a shiny MacGuffin that remains a mystery to us all, and runs into some meta-powered trouble courtesy of Creed (Brian Patrick Wade), a.k.a The Absorbing Man. As expected the cast comes off as a little dull, although Ming-Na Wen’s Agent May has come into her own and Agent Coulson is (as always) a pleasure and even Skye is less irritating than usual. Introducing a big hitter in The Absorbing Man is – in my humble opinion – a bloody good move, last season people were screaming for bigger, more exciting baddies and as the season progresses we’re all hoping for more. What’s in store? Who knows. I for one and looking forward to finding out the mystery of the lines and seeing how all the goodie/ baddie switching will play out. Hail Hydra. David Leighton
L
oosely based on the real life story of Walter O’Brien, a computer genius with an IQ of 197 and the 4th most intelligent person in the world, American drama series Scorpion follows an eccentric group of socially awkward super-geniuses who use their intelligence to solve threats against the modern world. Absorbed in their world of knowledge the group of hackers are struggling to pay the bills until Homeland Security agent Cabe Gallo - a blast from O’Brien’s past - recruits the group when a serious threat against the US develops. But O’Brien must first overcome his history with Cabe Gallo before taking on the high-tech challenge. As well as O’Brien, the group consists of Happy Quinn (the “mechanical prodigy”), Toby Curtis (a “world renowned shrink”), Sylvester Dodd (the “human calculator”), and Paige Dineen (the “normal” one) who helps them interpret the world and the quintessential parts of everyday life that they ironically struggle with. The waitress joins the group after they inform her that her son Ralph is intellectually gifted, not challenged as she supposed, in the hopes they will help her better understand her child. But we’re already anticipating this maternal concern will be sidelined in favour of an opposite-attracts relationship between Paige and Walter. Whilst we’re in an age where nerd culture has now become cool (just think of The Big Bang Theory) this show has the danger of tipping the scales over into too much technical mumbo jumbo and not enough entertainment for the common folks watching. Lets just hope that Scorpion gets the balance right.
The Courier
featurestv.25
Monday 27 October 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk/tv c2.tv@ncl.ac.uk | @courier_tv
Cartoon frightwork Our writers take a trip down memory lane and remember which cuddly cartoons scared the socks off them as children
Courage the Cowardly Dog
Lazytown From the children’s TV show LazyTown, Robbie Rotten is the world’s laziest and creepiest super-villain. Whilst the show may be promoting eating right and the importance of exercise (just what any child loves in a show) their villain is the stuff of nightmares. His plasticine face boasts chin prosthetics, inches of orange makeup, comically high eyebrows, and hair so congealed with wax it looks like it should have its own gravitational pull that sucks young children into the proverbial stickiness, and to top it off it’s all moulded into a rather sinister expression of sly happiness. The creepiest only increases with his signature tight stripy one piece with flared bottoms leaving little to the imagination. Watching his gangly body skulking around LazyTown with the cliché villain hunchback only depresses me on how far children’s TV and villains have stooped. Rather than inciting fear like any proper super-villain, this puffball is stuffed with marketing strategies that simply make him come across as the archetype of a creepy cartoon villain.
Unlike the Powerpuff Girls, Ed, Edd n Eddy or Cow and Chicken, Courage the Cowardly Dog sets itself apart thanks to it’s seriously creepy episodes. But why is it so creepy? The exquisite choice of music and the simple yet nightmarish artwork, create scenarios that linger in your mind and feed on what scares you most, especially as a child. However the creepiest recurring character is definitely Eustace Bagge. Something about his lanky form, green tinged glasses and pale complexion make all that they go through extra horrifying. Arguably he’s the most complex character in the series, with a full background story and stubborn personality he adds three dimensionality and allows viewers to sympathise with Courage. Most importantly, Eustace is used to trigger most of the unpleasant events that happen to the Bagge family and he is also the main victim, leaving Courage all the limelight as he writhes in pain in the corner. Sakura Brandi
Rebecca Dooley
The land of trope and glory Tria Lawrence
I
am no good with scary things. If I’m forced to watch a scary movie I will endure it with a blanket over my head, and I’ll still need to have the lights on while I sleep for at least two days. For this reason I also avoid TV programmes like American Horror Story (I’ve still not entirely recovered from my attempt at watching it). But you can’t really avoid the scary episodes that ordinary programmes drop in to keep you on your toes. If these one off episodes are going to succeed in making me reach for the blanket, they should definitely think about using one of the more terrifying tropes: ‘Hunting the Most Dangerous Game’. Imagine the terror of running for your life. Now imagine the terror when it’s not an animal or an avalanche that you’re running from, but a hunter who views your life as a simple pastime, a plaything to keep them occupied for a few hours as they hunt you down and kill you. This is ‘Hunting the Most Dangerous Game’, the ‘game’ being you. The example of this that most people will be familiar with is Ramsey Snow in Game of Thrones. Although it is only a small scene in one episode, it’s still a horrifying experience. We see Ramsey chasing after a young woman with a bow and arrow which are used primarily to injure her to the point that she can go no further. Then the hungry dogs are let loose on her. This scene is horrible enough with terror of the poor girl, but it’s made worse both by the pure pleasure that glitters on Ramsey’s face, and the reactions of Theon in the background that show to us that this is not a new thing for Ramsey – this girl is one of many.
“Humans are the most dangerous and terrifying things out there and you can’t ever escape them”
Powerpuff Girls HIM from The Powerpuff Girls has to be the scariest character ever in a children’s tv show. He has pointed ears, a malevolent grin, yellow eyes, lobsterlike claws, and dark red skin – some attributes which you associate with the devil. The idea of the devil itself is quite frightening, especially for the children the show was aimed at. But the most terrifying part of HIM is his voice. It is impossible to describe in words just how frightening it sounds. HIM has totally traumatized me for life. I can’t watch things with redfaced characters in (especially Insidious) because I get flashbacks back to HIM. Even just watching some clips of HIM now, over a decade since I first watched the show, my heart is pounding. Drew Baxter
Grizzly Tales for Gruesome Kids So you spent a horrifying day at school and you just wanted to chill out in front of the TV with a Capri Sun and your feet up. You flick on CITV and wait for all of the glorious cartoons to pour into your eyes. What you get is an actual nightmare. Yes, this is Grizzly Tales for Gruesome Kids, the show that tried to make you a better person whilst scaring the living daylights out of you. What made this show extra scary, for me, was the creepy old dude who introduced every tale. Uncle Grizzly, as he was affectionately known had seemed to run the entire cinema, single, gnarled-handedly, from giving that poor kid spider-filled tickets to serving up insect popcorn. The thing that really got me was his giant pet spider, Spindleshanks. I don’t care who you are, spiders are not friendly, and they definitely aren’t pets; it’s like it’s a clue to how creepy this guy is or something. Helen Daly
The Simpsons Mr Burns may not be the creepiest-looking cartoon character in the world, but he is the most evil. Every evening I would gather round the TV with my family to watch The Simpsons. And every evening I would get shivers as he uttered that infamous word: ‘Excellent’. Ew. His harsh treatment of the loyal Smithers, as well as the continuous trouble he causes for the Simpson family, obviously gives him immense pleasure, and that’s what is so creepy. A grotesque appearance has nothing on a truly sadistic soul. How old is Mr Burns, anyway? The fact that he is obviously on the brink of death in every single episode but never actually dies gives him a supernatural quality that is just terrifying. The producers of The Simpsons have really capitalised on the creepy nature too: remember that episode where he was a vampire? Or when he organised a human hunt? I don’t think images like that can every truly be erased. Ellie McLaren
Dollhouse plays this one entirely straight. Echo is sent on a romantic assignment, only to find that her date is more interested in hunting her than getting to know her. She ends up running for her life and cut off from any form of help. This episode becomes more terrifying when you realise the planning the date has put into hunting her. He has killed the park ranger, poisoned her water with a hallucinogen and intercepted the phone line to prevent her calling for help – everything to make it a more interesting hunt. However, the scariest uses of this trope is in Torchwood. What makes this one so terrifying is exactly because it’s Torchwood: you automatically expect aliens to be the answer to the mystery. Even though the characters are hunted throughout the episode, it feels okay, because you know that it’s all perfectly imaginary, there are no such things as aliens so it’s never going to happen to you. Then the ending reveals that that’s not the case at all - no alien involvement, just humans. And just as you think you can move on from it and still have a happy and unscarred life, the hunters tell you why they do it: it makes them happy. You can’t blame the supernatural or aliens for all the scary things in the world anymore. You have been forced to recognise that uncomfortable truth that humans are the m o s t dangerous and terrifying things out there and you can’t ever escape them.
26.filmfeatures
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Film Editors: Rosie Bellini & David Leighton Online Editor: Lucas Fothergill
Villainous Britannia
The gory story behind jump- scares America may have won independence, but our ilk still strikes fear in the
George heart of the homeland. G eorge Smith ORRNV DW %ULWLVK EDGGLHV LQ ¿ OP
T
he audience for horror is usually divided into two types: those who look for bloodshed and those who look for fear. To be frightened for fun became fashionable in 70s (see classic horror movies like Psycho & Friday 13th) and the main jump-scares were practically invented back in those days. One of the screen writers of the recent horror Sinister, C. Robert Cargill says that “a good scare jump is a magic trick” and that the trick is to redirect the audience and enchant them. A simple combination is to create a suspenseful atmosphere, everyone expects something monstrous to emerge on the screen, its nonoccurrence creates a distraction, which makes the audience feel safe, and then suddenly BANG! It might be a simple scream, fast movement or some disgusting creature - anything to scare out the audience out of their wits. So here are my top five tips for scaring the audience into a blubbering mass.
5: Sudden noises/sound effects These are present in nearly all horror films, even in the low-budget film of Oren Peli, Paranormal Activity, where some demonic presence constantly throws furniture or just rattles along the house. The domestic environment and the lack of computer effects makes the whole picture so realistic that even Steven Spielberg was frightened and had to stop halfway through. Although, to be fair, the characters in Paranormal Activity are always extremely curious, happy to climb in tiny chinks or crawl into its where something terrifying is probably hidden.
T
om Hiddleston, Alan Rickman, Gary Oldman, Jeremy Irons, Sean Bean, Mark Strong and Christopher Lee - what is it that all these fine actors have in common? They are all British and have largely earned their reputations playing the villain in American cinema. These are experienced and trained actors, who have shown their dexterity and malleability time and time again, yet when they are shipped over to the states, you can put money on the chances that they will not be the gun-toting heroes who steal the show. No, because they are British, so obviously they are intrinsically duplicitous and inclined to world domination; but why do we appear this way in American cinema?
“It is not, as Helen Mirren might suggest, something to become indignant about. I perceive it as a badge of honour that the most memorable and wonderful roles are often granted to my countrymen”
4: Camera angles Take the character of 28 Days Later, a man who watches almost everything through a hole in the wall, and (perhaps not) unexpectedly he is presented with zombies desperately trying to eat his insides. This can even be done without sound effects as the viewpoint is more than enough to make it scary as the unexpected emergence of ghosts or demons on the screen always tends to startle the audience.
3: Sudden appearances James Wan has mastered this sort of jump-scare in his films, for example in Insidious. We’re privy to a devilish grimace that appears directly behind the main character’s face in the absolutely quiet and safe atmosphere of the daytime. In addition, all directors are well aware of the fact that the unknown is the most frightening, so sometimes they just turn off the light and let the audience simmer, so they never know when to expect the next jumpscare.
2: Darkness The Spanish horror [REC] is often considered one of the most successful films to employ this. Nearly the entire last act of the film is shot with an infrared camera in complete darkness and features the terrifying and sudden appearances of equally terrifying creatures. It’s a film that keeps the audience in constant suspense.
1: The ol’ mirror trick Alexandre Aja embodied the idea of this fear in Mirrors, the whole film is built the premise that your fear is visible (but not really) which makes for some great jump-scares. It’s a classic trick which has remained frightening throughout film history. So whilst fear might be a subjective feeling which can arise in different situations and for different people, there are certain tricks, tropes and tips a horror director will employ and so hiding behind your sofa has become common for nearly all horror fans. Valentina Egorova
One theory for the prevalence of the British accent in the role of the baddie is that it stirs up emotions in the American collective consciousness, causing them to quake in their cowboy boots about long passed days of tyranny and oppression. In the Disney movie The Lion King (1993), we find Scar (voiced by Jeremy Irons) deposing the strong and virtuous Mufasa, establishing himself as the new leader of the pride in the process, with his band of hyenas to keep the peace. Irons’ voice is perfect for the power hungry, sociopathic Scar, because his inclination is for domination at all costs. The story is reliving the glories of the American War of Independence, playing on memories that the British are oppressors, hungry for power at the cost of the population. My favourite instance of the transparent evocation of the British accent in the role of the villain is that of Dr Hannibal Lecter as played by Anthony Hopkins in 1988’s Silence of the Lambs and Hannibal in 2001. In the novels, Lecter was born in Lithuania, went to medical school in Paris and subsequently found his way to Baltimore, USA, without once touching one toe on the grass of this green and pleasant land. Many will claim that Hopkins’ Lecter does not in fact speak
with a Received Pronunciation accent, but some sort of slippery hybrid of European and Northern American that finds elements of RP within it along the way. They would debatably - be correct, but it is these British elements that give Lecter’s voice its trademark evil. Lecter is a master manipulator, relying on the hypnotic nature of his voice and the mastery of language to control people (even talking Miggs into swallowing his own tongue), one will find the clarity and universal intelligibility required in few accents other than that of RP. But it is not, as Helen Mirren
might suggest, something to become indignant about. I perceive it as a badge of honour that the most memorable and wonderful roles are often granted to my countrymen. Who remembers Clarice Starling as opposed to Dr Lecter? John McLane against Hans Gruber? Severus Snape or Harry Potter? I personally will root for Scar over Simba any day, as should any Brit who loves his country.
Horror: scarier or shittier?
Have we seen all that horror’s got going for it? t? Rhian Hunter investigates
T
he history of horror films runs parallel with a history of the definition of what is deemed ‘scary’. Something that scared people in the late 1800s (when the horror film genre was first established with George Melies’ Le Manoir du Diable [The Devil’s Castle]) ]) might seem odd compared to contemporary horror films. In the past the genre was rooted in religious practices over history and mythological tales of demons and monsters. However, in 1931 the world saw the release of two classics – Bela Lugosi’s Dracula and James Whale’s Frankenstein.. Both were hugely commercially successful, popularising the horror genre and increasing the demand for new ways to scare audiences.
“We crave bigger, better, scarier; but unfortunately overused clichés are reproduced again and again”
One monumental household name in the filmmaking industry is of course Alfred Hitchcock. The ‘Master of Suspense’ pioneered numerous techniques that are now considered key elements of the horror genre. This development of suspense as a facilitator of fear drew the focus of horror films away from monsters, vampires and the supernatural. We no longer needed something imaginary to be scared – the murderous villain combined with atmospheric tension would suffice. Stanley Kubrick’s 1980 adaptation of Stephen King’s The Shining combines supernatural elements with suspense and reality. Additionally, his 1970’s A Clockwork Orange, whilst not necessarily categorised as horror, introduced ‘ultra-violence’, shocking audiences worldwide and proving
that reality can be just as terrifying as fiction. But have scary movies gone downhill in recent years? Whilst innovations seem scarce nowadays, there is the occasional film that stands out. Take Silence of the Lambs (1999); whilst containing elements of horrific origin – such as cannibalism – utilises realism, making the audience believe that what they are watching could actually happen. But when compared to horror classics such as The Exorcist, the public reception of such films has a lot to say about the difference between scares then and now. When it was first shown to audiences in 1973, The Exorcist left them reeling, with many cinemagoers fainting, vomiting, and running out of the theatre in disgust. Yet in my (and indeed a few others’) experience, seeing the supposedly scary Paranormal Activity 2 on the big screen was more laughably entertaining than terrifying. It appears that horror films today have lost the ability to scare the audience as much, perhaps because they’re running out of ideas, and much of the context that legitimised such fear – like widespread religious belief – is no longer present in our contemporary age. As a society we have been desensitised to violence through increased accessibility of such content on the Internet, TV and in literature. We crave bigger, better, scarier; but unfortunately overused clichés are reproduced again and again within different contexts, producing an excess of substandard films that lean toward comedic horror rather than genuine fright (see: Wrong Turn sequels to catch my drift). With the exception of the occasional hidden gem such as the 2012 masterpiece Cabin in the Woods, the horror genre is not getting scarier; it’s merely stuck in limbo, waiting for the next Hitchcock or The Exorcist to break the cycle.
The Courier
reviewsfilm.27
Monday 27 October 2014
“My My name is Lester Burnham. This is my neighbourhood. This is my street. This is my life. In less than a year I will be dead dead.” - American Beauty (1999)
WKHFRXULHURQOLQH FR XN ¿ OP F ¿ OP#QFO DF XN _ #&RXULHUB
Sean Bean
Withnail & I (15)
W
machine
I
hen asked whether I wanted to review Withnail and I, one of my all-time favourite films, I was elated. It meant I would get to see it on the big screen at Tyneside Cinema after so many years. There’s something remarkable about this film that enables it to transcend the confines of black comedy and become something much more poignant whilst remaining hilarious. Evidently Tyneside Cinema share my opinion, that this film is an absolute classic, and it still has what it takes to bring audiences flocking twenty seven years after its original release. Withnail and I is the story of two young unemployed male actors living together in utter squalor, in 1969’s Camden Town, London. One thing they have in common is that their lives are going nowhere, but aside from that they are very different characters: Withnail (Richard E. Grant) is the abrasive and articulate alcoholic, whose recklessness is tolerated by our more collected, yet anxiety-prone narrator (the ‘I’ in the equation, played by Paul McGann), who for the most part submits to the will of the former. Seeking recuperation and escape, a trip to the Lake District is planned courtesy of the hilarious Uncle Monty (Richard Griffiths). Of course, their plan falls short of the mark, and a
weekend’s therapy turns into an extended drinking session, complicated by Monty’s own sexual conquest of these two terrified heterosexuals. The drear of Camden is met by an equally sublime bleakness in the setting of Uncle Monty’s Lake District cottage. The alcoholic binge that is the plot adds to a sense of a very romantically depressed feeling throughout the film, coupled with a very quotable, poetic commentary by our narrator, making for an overall impression of an ode to gloom and a relish in a life going nowhere. It is a nostalgic look at the 60s too, making its comment on the death of an era which has burnt itself out, leaving behind these two sorry stragglers. But perhaps the performances deliver the brunt of
the films emotional force, particularly the blistering Richard E. Grant whose portrayal of Withnail launched his career. It’s amazing to think he had never been drunk before the film. Withnail and I, after all the laughs, is a melancholy film about breaking ties with the things you love. It is sophisticated too, filled with obscurity and borrowed soliloquies which deliver a staggering catharsis that rivals those of the theatre. It is this incredibly heartfelt, intelligent undertone in the film which eventually dominates as a lasting impression, and makes Withnail and I what it is – a true classic. More like this: History Boys (2006) Teddy McDonald
The Equalizer (15)
Annabelle (12A)
‘71 (15)
f cats have nine lives, Sean Bean is some kind of manic human-feline hybrid with a hint of Time Lord-fuelled regeneration. Now, some kind of sick Hollywood-conspiracy has seen Seany killed over twenty times on screen, so, we thought we’d do the guy some justice and bring you five of his most horrific, gruesome, and downright heroic demises.
B
ean bites the dust
Don’t Say A Word Sean had it coming in this one. His odious jewel thief takes a wrong turn and finds himself in the middle of an excavating machine. Michael Douglas’ child psychologist is a little upset that Sean kidnapped his daughter in order to find a glorious gem, and thus can’t resist yanking the lever that sends tonnes of ash hurtling towards his enemy.
O
Game of Thrones So often portraying the hero, Bean’s brave Lord Stark is mercilessly beheaded with the world’s longest sword at the bequest of Mr Joffrey after making the chivalrous, yet deadly decision to plead guilty to treason. This was the moment that GOT thrust itself into the staple TV diet of millions. Mind you, it’s not as if the victim hadn’t been well practiced in the art of death- at least this was a clean one!
S
A
n ageing, lonely man with a military past sees himself rejoining the world he thought he had left behind. With the use of his specialist knowledge and fighting skills he aims to help a girl subjugated into prostitution by an Eastern European mob. Sound familiar? That’s because it is. The film is a blatant rip-off of Taken, with almost an identical plot and characters. Denzel Washington plays Robert McCall, the aforementioned man with Chloë Grace Moretz playing Teri, a young Russian prostitute. Marton Csokas’ plays Teddy, a man who is basically an evil Robert playing a cat and mouse hunt for vengeance and justice. The film even does something rarely seen in the action genre, (get this) by having the bad-guys be tattoo-sporting Russian mobsters (one of which being played by millionaire dickhead Dan Blizerian). Everything in this movie is a cliché; from the predictable plot, to Denzel Washington’s ‘cool guys don’t look at explosions’ moment. As for characters, well ... there are none. Everyone is a caricature, with Robert McCall being the superhero dealing out justice to all the wrong doers and helping out everyone. The bad guy is stereotypically evil. He kills people, he beats them up and it’s even implied he killed his parents - all very interesting and thought provoking. It seems Chloë was cast purely for her name as all her interactions are very forced and awkward - a pity as Kick Ass and Hick clearly show she can act. Although action films rarely rely on story and characters to make them entertaining, I would have forgiven this film if the action was good, but it isn’t. Just with every other aspect of the film the action is boring and predictable, making it anything but an entertaining watch. A poor man’s Taken, The Equalizer does nothing but disappoint. More like this: Taken (2008) Daniel Lowther
J
N
ump-scare, murder, jump-scare, door opening unprovoked, jump-scare, satanic cult, and what the hell, another jump-scare; of these things is Annabelle made. Set in the 1960s, Annabelle begins with John Gordon and his pregnant wife Mia as they look forward to a comfortable suburban life until a break in by a satan worshiping, hairy hippie couple causes their already creepy-ass doll to be possessed by a seemingly unquenchable murderous spirit, hungry for the soul of an innocent (cough *Chucky* cough). As with every clichéd horror movie, random moving objects give way to more menacing accidents, convincing everybody that there is something very awry with dollie. Now Mia must stand between her infant child and the furnace gates of hell. If it is possible to become immune to jumpscares, then audiences certainly will have a fair shot at it watching Annabelle. In fact, director John R. Leonetti uses and abuses every scare tactic he can suck from the fabric of the last ten years of paranormal horror and proves himself to be a master of none. I did actually wonder at one point whether this was intended as a sort of self-aware homage to the genre but was quickly convinced that it is in earnest. I actually take umbrage to horror movies which utilise dolls as the vehicles of malice. It cannot just be me that finds dolls creepy enough as it is, the addition of a satanic element to the mixture does not alter my feelings towards them one iota. The basic plot flaw in these films being that any sane person shouldn’t let a doll into their house in the first place. Annabelle does little more than cheapen the future of the horror genre and cannot be taken seriously by anyone aside from those who have never actually seen a horror film and don’t know what to expect.
ew directors occasionally reveal another dimension to cinema or even showcase old, well-known stories in a new light. This is exactly the case with brutal and vociferous debut from Yane Demange, whose picture ’71, a war-zone thriller set in 1971 in Belfast during The Troubles. This nightmarish time was a brave decision yet Damange’s gamble has paid off; being universally relevant to any modern conflict. We look at this story from the perspective of young soldier Gary Hook (Jack O’Connell) whose unit is delegated to maintain a peace among the rising tensions in the city. However, on the first day during a riot Hook is cut from others and left alone in a strange city among hostile strangers armed with only a single wish: to survive. This main character is not intrepidly fearless, as usually happens in war films; he is lost, wounded and horrified, he screams and cries. And his feelings are masterfully performed by O’Connell. He suffers, and you feel his pain. Some critics say that Jack O’connell is the most promising British actor of his generation and going to rise very quickly, and on this evidence he will. Yane Demange wanted to create an aesthetically challenging setting and it seems to me that he succeed in it. The retro colouring and the shaking camera make the audience a part of the crowd as well as of the film. Another merit of this film is music: the soundtrack might not resemble 1971’s charts, but they are too good and atmospheric to notice. ’71 is unlikely to be called a good historical film as the political side of the conflict is revealed quite superficially but where it truly shines is the manner in which it deals with people; how they behave in such circumstances and what happen to those who cannot kill others.
More like this: Chucky (1988)
More like this: Hunger (2008) George Smith
Valentina Egorova
ff with his Ned
ean’s ‘armless Black Death
In a film named after one of the most brutal pandemics in human history, Bean’s medieval knight manages to meet an even more gruesome end. Unfortunate Ulric is captured by vicious villagers on his search for a nasty necromancer. Tied to two horses, Bean’s mission ends with him being brutally dismembered. Lovely.
M
oooove over Sean
The Field Plot Synopsis: Sean Bean’s dad gets upset about a bit of grass; tries to herd his livestock over a cliff; Sean Bean falls to his death in a chaotic cloud of wasted beef burgers and woolly jumpers. At least he made it to the end this time.
M
y captain my Bean The Fellowship of the Ring
A list of Bean-flavoured fatalities wouldn’t be complete without mentioning one of the greatest on screen deaths of all time. He’d battled cave trolls, Orcs, and some powerful inner demons yet it was a few pieces of arrow-shaped wood that snatched Boromir’s last breath. He will live on in a wave of ‘one does not simply’ memes and viral Youtube videos.
Sean Bean
1959 - 1986, 1989, 1990, 1994, 1991, 1992, 1995, 1998, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003,2004, 2005,
2007, 2009, 2010 ... David Naylor
28.music
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Music Editors: Jamie Shepherd, Dominique Daly and Chris Addison
Don’t techno for an answer
Live: Southern @ ThinkTank
Music Editor Dominique Daly gets a taste of home with Belfast blues siblings Southern This week our t’s very rare that you get to see a band lose pears to need a bit of work. Lucy Southern is shy comic relief to the otherwise awkward silence and intrepid club cavalier their cool, especially those bands who seem and quiet barely speaking a word during long si- ding of tuning guitars. Max Palmer-Geaves pretty ice cold to begin with. The small lences which her brother tries his best to fill with Breaking through the strange audience participatells us about the freaki- glimpse into the not so glamourous side of being awkward anecdotes about the support band which tion came Thom’s guitar as he launched into crowd est goings on in spooky on the road I got when watching Southern sound descends into literal ‘cat calling’. The support band favourite ‘Think about it’, its rough hooks and disbefore their gig at ThinkTank in Newcastle in question was Man Made, a Mancunian three tortion bringing the band back into their element toon. And no, we’re not check showcased some of the frustrations that come piece who boast none other than Johnny Marr’s for another round of bluesy brilliance. One of referring to Sting’s latest hand in hand with working your way to the top. son Nile Marr as their front man. The band start- Southern’s ultimate selling points is the chemistry Shoddy equipment and sound men that have ed the gig off nicely with their dreamy indie and between the duo, their ability to match each other’s album
I
Soul Jam ‘Dead Disco’ Halloween Party! @ World Headquarters 30th If you’ve never experienced World HQ before (and it is an experience) this might not be the night to come and check out Newcastle’s coolest club, located in Curtis Mayfield House. With its history going back into the eighties, and using the Trent House bar as the original venue, the team behind World HQ was responsible for trying to create a place devoid of racism, sexism and dickheads in general. Soul Jam as a night is really something special, if grooving to the best of Motown, Northern Soul and Disco is your vibe then this is the night for you. Four hours of uplifting music mixed on vinyl: why would you go anywhere else? Seeing as it’s Halloween there is a dressing up competition with the theme of ‘Dead Disco’, which means big hair and big shoes. Better still, though, there are genuine prizes for those who put in a decent effort- first prize will get you free entry for the rest of summer term, a crate of Red Stripe and two Soul Jam t-shirts. Listen to: Gloria Jones – ‘Tainted Love’ Ill Behaviour XL Halloween Special @ NUSU 31st Considering what a standard night in Cosmic Ballroom (Ill Behaviour’s usual abode) entails I can’t help but say that I was surprised to see that their Halloween special is being held in the Student Union. A1 Bassline and Wilfred Giroux are not to be missed. Though they could, however, be argued as being an odd headline pairing due to their differences in sound, I would say they are a wise choice as it means there will be something for everyone this evening. The selection of the Union as the venue for this year is interesting as I remember seeing Halloween’s headline act three years ago in a less-than-full Cosmic. These days if you want to get into Ill Behaviour on a Tuesday night you have to be queuing by 10pm. Its popularity is growing and its crowd is changing as it becomes the ‘place to be seen to be’ and Ill Behaviour in the Union is a clear indication of its the nights commercialization. Listen to: Sam Smith – ‘Stay With Me (Wilfred Giroux remix)’ You Need To Hear This: Kaytranada Instrumental Hip Hop Is Dead is the bold title of Kaytranada’s first mixtape, which is forty-eight minutes of blisteringly wonky instrumental goodness. If you listen to it start to finish you can’t help but be convinced by the end that this hero of the Soundcloud generation is the contemporary answer to J.Dilla. If you’re looking for something a little less squiggly his remix work is the answer as reworks of Janet Jackson and, probably most famously, ‘Lady’ by Modjo were the soundtracks to a lot of people’s summers. 2015 is set to be his year as he’s supported Kanye, playing the Yeezus afterparties, and has been responsible for two of the only Boiler Rooms where the hipsters were dancing. Download: ‘At All’ For more expert knowledge on Newcastle’s electronic and clubbing scene, be sure to tune into Max’s show Electronic Blanket on NSR every Sunday evening.
listening issues – it wasn’t a fairy tale beginning for the perfect gig. However, the Belfast siblings Lucy and Thom persevered and flash forward two hours and they had regained their cool under the stage lights and were ready to captivate. Watching the fresh faced duo is quite astounding; looking so innocent and sweet any unsuspecting listener might be poised for some soft folk or indie pop. However, the style of raucous blues that seeps from their instruments and washes over the audience is warmly welcomed by the small but enthusiastic audience. Thom’s vocals have an intensity and a thoughtfulness that seem beyond his yeaars; his ability to switch up his vocal style between a smooth almost whispered hush and the rough rasp that is oh so recognisable from this genre gives strength to their performance.
sequin jackets however, their real show started as part of the crowd; howling and meowing through each song break – it was unusual but a pleasant
“Johnny Marr’s son Nile started howling and meowing through each song break”
voices in a harmony that packs a serious punchwhich is demonstrated well in newest release ‘Cool Kid’ . Lucy’s voice however is not just a compliment to her brother’s talent; she has a control and style to her vocal that reminds of Laura Marling in its breathy strength. The two voices meshed together in a whirlwind of alternative cool and despite some feedback issues throughout the gig they sounded flawless.
“Southern’s ultimate selling points are the chemistry between the duo, their ability to match each other’s voices in a harmony that packs a serious punch”
Despite Southern having a relatively good amount of experience, gigging and touring from a young age, their stage presence between songs ap-
Everything Will Be Alright in the End Weezer
A
lt-rock quartet Weezer recently released their ninth studio album Everything Will Be Alright In The End and the verdict on their latest offering is …startlingly positive, actually. Having always been a bit on the fence about Weezer, I wasn’t expecting to like their latest record. Not unlike most of the band’s fans, I firmly think that Weezer’s best albums were their first two, before they decided that silly amounts of experimentation and a shedload of pop production was the way forward. On this record, it seems that Weezer have realised that it’s time to get back to basics, as reflected in lead single ‘Back to the Shack’, which has all of Weezer’s old charm and a new-found nostalgia that’ll melt the heart of former Weezer fans. The songs are centred around three themes, according to vocalist Rivers Cuomo; his relationship with his father, his relationship with women, and the band’s relationship with their fans and other bands. They’ve come to a point in their career, where having reached cult status and a place in the alt-rock hall of fame, they have to come to terms with the fact that they’re having to give way to a newer generation of rock bands. It’s a welcome change in lyrical focus which makes for a relatable and cohesive collection of songs, from the funky as heck ‘I’ve Had It Up To Here’, to the quirky and jauntily whistled ‘Da Vinci’. This is still Weezer, but better than they’ve been in a long time. The album closes with a three-part suite that acts as a nod to extravagance and ambition, but hits on the right tone –it’s a likable trio of songs, and as the last epic chords of ‘III – Return To Ithaka’ fade out, I can only think that Weezer are finally back and finally worth listening to again. Iqra Choudhry
The Best Day Thurston Moore
Master Mix Red Hot + Arthur Russell
G
A
uitar, guitar and more guitar. The Best Day is essentially Sonic Youth, if Sonic Youth had been ruthlessly dictated by Thurston Moore. It is a good job then that guitar is what he does best. Moore is instantly recognisable on the slacker pulse of opening track ‘Speak To The Wild’, whereas on experimental tracks such as ‘Tape’ he transforms into a dark and brooding character. These songs demonstrate both the experimental elements and the twisted hooks that he contributed to Sonic Youth and are essentially the building blocks of his new solo effort. Not only this but Moore also demonstrates a startling pop sensibility that seems to fly out of nowhere on the country rock-esque title track. This turns out to be the kick start the album needed and from here it really takes off. The post-punk racket of ‘Detonation’ sinks its teeth deep into the sound of Sonic Youth’s seminal album ‘Goo’ and throws us back into the golden years of the 90’s. It is a shame then, that this burst of energy does not last long, as we are plunged once again into darkness with a creeping, dislocated track in the form of ‘Vocabularies’. Tedious in its length and guitar indulgence, like many of the tracks here, it is a little bit challenging. This album presents to us a musician with a very impressive drive to create and experiment. The musicianship is no doubt staggering and, as always, the riffs and hooks are as genius as ever. All The Best Day needs is for the punk within to rear its head out of the experimental fog just a few more times. Experimentation is fine but no one can doubt the fact that Thurston Moore’s talent for a little bit of rock ’n’ roll is unparalleled. Liam Keeble
rthur Russell was a unique and innovative cellist, who continually experimented with his music, merging genres of classical and disco. Russell passed in 1992 to AIDSrelated illnesses, producing very little musical output in his lifetime. However, over the last two decades, his unreleased work has been shared, which in turn has spread his influence to many diverse musicians. HIV/AIDS charity Red Hot pay tribute to the cult figure with this compilation, which encompasses all facets of Russell’s musical output, reflecting his quiet edge and his synth pop side. Opening with Jose Gonzalez introverted acoustic cover of ‘This is How We Walk on the Moon’. This beautiful rendition of one of Russell’s most well know songs is reinvented under the hum of saxophones and Gonzales’ glittering guitar. Elsewhere, The Revival Hour’s ‘I’m Hiding Your Present From You’, is delicate and touching, channelling Russell’s tender voice, but adding an electronic edge. Blood Orange’s cover of ‘Is It All Over My Face & Tower of Meaning’, adds to the funky element of the compilation, in this laid-back, horn-filled delight. Similarly, another highlight of the compilation is Robyn’s ‘Tell You (Today)’, an electric four to the floor dance floor hit with infectious whistling that ripples throughout. Energy buzzes through the whole song, possibly superseding the Loose Joints’ original. Sufjan Steven also stands out with ‘A Little Lost’, encapsulating Russell’s progressive sound, replicating his sonic melody reminiscence of an 80s epic. Master Mix: Red Hot + Arthur Russell is a celebration of a true artist who could not be defined by genre and is still more than relevant today. Leah McAteer
The Courier
music.29
Monday 27 October 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk/music c2.music@ncl.ac.uk | @courier_music
Spook Doggy Dogg Hip hop honeys Shake have given us two tickets to their Halloween night at WHQ to give to the reader who can think up the spookiest musical moment. Here’s Sophie Ahmed¶V WRS ¿ YH
3
1
In 2011 the weed smoking, gin and juice drinking rap master Snoop Doggy Dogg aka Snoop Lion aka Snoop Zilla, or whatever he wanted to be called that year got right into the Halloween spirit. Donning a giant head to become The Count from Seasame Street and simultanously making everything in the world 100% better.
David Byrne’s spooky surprise appearance at an Arcade Fire show I was at in Brooklyn this year. As he performed a Suicide cover dressed as Dracula, I was more panic-stricken at the idea of breathing the same air as the Talking Heads’ frontman than shaken with horror. But he certainly looked ready for Halloween.
5
2
In 1997, Aphex Twin (Richard D James) produced one of the most disturbing music videos to date. The visuals for ‘Come to Daddy’ were conjured up inside Chris Cunningham’s twisted mind and rotate around the recurring lyric, “I want your soul”. Distorted noise and creepy Richard clones guarantee nightmares.
4
If there was ever a threat to be frightened of it has to be Miley Cyrus’ immortal declaration, “Stinkin’ Radiohead…I’m gonna ruin them”. 5 years ago, Miley was so enraged by the band’s refusal to meet her at the Grammys that she plotted cold-blooded revenge. She’s been too busy being scary this year, so we’re still waiting for it.
Oh,what became of the local lads? Here at The Courier we’re all about supporting local music from the Toon and beyond. This week George Suddaby takes a look at identical duo Gallery Circus and Ellie McLaren tells us about her favourite local band from Boro
N
at high levels. Guitarist Daniel Ross cleverly dominated the stage, which often engulfs a two-piece band, ensuring the crowds interest in the performance was maintained by being dynamic on-stage. The band’s punk roots were clear to see with the effort and energy portrayed on stage. Graeme also had a major part to play in the energy reverberating from the band. Behind his drum-kit, he gave his all and even brought hu-
“The band’s punk roots were clear to see with the effort and energy portrayed on stage”
They certainly didn’t lack anything in the sound department either. It’s easy to sound weak and lifeless when there are only drums, one guitar, and vocals on stage. Daniel cleverly manipulated the effects on his electric guitar for the duration of the concert, and, through the use of three separate amplifiers, enhanced the overall rounded sound which the band were able to produce. Having already performed at Glastonbury on the BBC Introducing Stage, Gallery Circus are on the right track to achieving stardom. After this performance, I can certainly see them hitting the big time in the next few years. George Suddaby
I
f you’re sick of hearing the word ‘indie’ added to anything not Katy Perry on today’s music scene, and nostalgically long for a return to the good old days, then look no further than Middlesbrough six-piece Collectors Club. Hailing from literally round the corner from my home, Collectors Club are quintessential indie rock, including the oh so important cool hairstyles. Formed in 2010, Collectors Club received immediate great success locally: headline gigs at some of Middlesbrough’s biggest venues, including The
ne time, if the word PornHub was said in public conversation people would smile furtively, recalling that eclectic library of filth we’d browse in secrecy during those few precious hours after school before mum got home. Now, PornHub is no longer satisfied with being your bedtime buddy. It wants to be in your earphones. It wants to be on the radio. It wants to be in your head. PornHub Records was officially launched at the end of last month. The move wasn’t unexpected; already New York producer FaltyDL had uploaded his single ‘Some Jazz Shit’ via their website and as had the Californian post-punk group Xiu Xiu, with their single ‘Black Dick’. Ultimately it’s PornHub’s choice of poster boy that I found even more hilarious. It turns out Coolio has spent his musical stalemate travelling from the Valley of Death to The Valley of L.A. to shoot a promotional video for PornHub, subtly named ‘Take It To The Hub’. If anyone of you have had the misfortune of watching this, I can only hope you took a long shower afterwards. Coolio, surrounded by a menagerie of miserable looking porn stars, spends the whole video gallivanting around toting a drumstick (there is no kit to be seen), insisting that we “grab a glove” and “take it to the Hub” whilst reeling off various porn websites owned by PornHub. There’s also a felt dinosaur eating a banana. The whole thing is a commercial gangbang.
“There’s something about being told to masturbate by a 51 year old ex-rapper that makes me not want to masturbate”
Send your spook-tacular music moment suggestions to c2.music@newcastle.ac.uk by Thursday 30th October to be in for a chance to win two Shake Halloween Special tickets.
mour to the performance by a hilarious, and musically sound, drum solo on the ceiling of the stage. Perfectly timed, and well executed, this brought a nice contrast to the overall professional performance.
Jack Dempsey goes deep (ahem) into the recent revelation that Porn- Hub has started its own record label
O
In 1994, a terrifying interview was conducted with a skeleton-like John Frusciante from the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Excessive heroin use had turned the once-boisterous young guitar virtuoso into a recluse on the verge of death. In the interview, John claimed to have heard ‘ghosts’ on the record they had previously released.
ewcastle University Computer Science graduates Gallery Circus returned to their native home to play a stunning performance at Think Tank. Gallery Circus, comprising of identical twin brothers Graeme (drums/vocals) and Daniel Ross (guitar/vocals), produce music in a similar mould to that of Royal Blood and The White Stripes. Their highoctane performances, coupled with a huge sound, leaves audiences wanting their music to keep on going until the sun rises. From the moment the Newcastle rockers took to the stage, the energy was
Talking Head
Empire, were sell-outs, catching the attention of Bob Fischer, from BBC Radio Tees. And who can blame Fischer for being infected by the ColClub bug? Their single ‘First to Know’ was the track of my summer 2012. Right from the offset, the uplifting guitar hooks just make you bop your head like a lunatic, and the melodious vocals that are so typical of the indie genre can only be described as ‘spot on’. Their sound is very much like the offspring of Vampire Weekend and Bombay Bicycle Club. Their relationship with the local BBC radio sta-
“Collectors Club are quintessential indie rock, including the oh so important cool hair styles”
tion led to the six-piece being offered a gig on the BBC Introducing stage at T in the Park in 2011. They went down a treat, so much so that the band became the fifth most-shared artist online of the whole festival. If all of this wasn’t impressive enough, the band also have their own record label: This Is An Adventure. You can say that again ColClub! From the offset, the band has been on a whirlwind of success; their lyrical and musical prowess has been allowed to run free thanks to the fact that they run themselves. Want to hear Collectors Club for yourself? They’ve got a headline gig at Newcastle o2 Academy 2 in November, and ticket prices won’t put a dent in your student loan. Make sure you check them out on Spotify and SoundCloud first so you can sing your heart out to their feel-good tunes. What are you waiting for? Ellie McLaren
Now I don’t know about you, but there’s something about being told to masturbate by a 51 year old ex-rapper to an aggressively bland hip-hop track that makes me, I don’t know, not want to masturbate. Does that make me weird? It’s ironic really, considering how often modern music videos have been accused of leaving “art” behind in the more lucrative pursuit of selling sexual titillation. What’s more ironic, I feel, is that porn can actually be defined as a creative activity “of no artistic value”. Vice President of PornHub Corey Price did, however, make this statement in its defence: “We’re looking for acts that aren’t necessarily porn-focused. We’re an ad-based network looking for content that appeals to our demographic. Mature lyrics for an adult audience; no boy bands or teen-pop, for instance.” Although this last bit is commendable, I have a few moral qualms about a porn website producing what is supposed to be art. To me, pornography is videoed prostitution, in that people are being paid to have sex. The only difference is that it’s in front of a camera and not in the back of a car. In fact, the Greek root of the word pornography actually means “writing about prostitutes”. For some reason, we seem to associate prostitution with drug addled women on street corners, and porn stars with glamour and riches. This really is not the case. The porn industry is a vicious, dehumanising business in which actors are not at all paid as well as you’d expect. Now not all porn is like this, amateur porn for example is often filmed by couples for fun, but when it is uploaded onto a website like PornHub, mostly for people to - well, we know what people do to it - it represents the same ideology: no intimacy, no connection, only mindless fucking. So when PornHub releases its trashy tunes, to what will undoubtedly be a visual fuckathon, we are again being fed this same ideology. All we can hope is that it stays in the musical wasteland with the likes of Coolio.
The Courier
gaming.31
Monday 27 October 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk @Courier_Gaming
Gaming Editors: Sophie Baines and Ben Tyrer
*DPHV RU ¿ OPV ZKLFK DUH VFDULHU" Terrifying
'RHV WKH LQWHUDFWLYLW\ RI JDPHV PDNH WKHP SULPH IHDU IDFWRULHV" 2U GR ¿ OPV SRVVHVV an unmatched spooky quality? Chris Addison and James McCoull duke it out &KULV Films are scarier - sort your life out
“There’s a reason the Silent Hill films failed, and it’s not because Sean Bean survived them”
L
et’s face it people, if you’re going to get scared by a video game, you probably don’t have much else to hope for in life. For one thing, you control the game. If anything is going to scare you, it’s your own bloody fault for letting it happen. If something jumps out at you, move on and reach the goal that if you’re anything like me you’ve been spending hours to get to. There’s also that little thing of a video game being completely not real. No matter how good the graphics are or how frazzled your brain is, that thing jumping out at you isn’t actually going to get you, so just grow a pair and move on. Films on the other hand, there is something to actually get scared at. Now, I’m not going to start making the case that something like The Exorcist is actually going to happen. But often horror films are embedded in some grain of reality, and whilst things may get exaggerated, the truth is that a lot of horror stems from the fact that strange things have actually happened to people. So when you think about it, being scared of the dark isn’t all that funny. A horror film also gives you a complete lack of control. A film keeps rolling even when you’re ter-
“Whether you’re sat on the sofa or in a crowded cinema, you are at the mercy of those movie magicians so you have the right to be scared” rified while a game stops to accommodate your cowardice. Whether you’re sat on the sofa on your lonesome or in a crowded cinema, you are at the mercy of those movie magicians, so you have the right to be scared. Horror films will always be terrifying. Actually getting scared by a video game just means you need to sort your life out.
5HYLHZ Five Nights At Freddie’s
I
n my opinion, horror games can be compared to super spicy curries. Instead of consuming it for how delicious and enjoyable it is, you’re consuming it for the sheer thrill that shocks your senses and leaves your mouth gaping open in terror. For £1.80 you can buy the port of what may well be the most exotic and taste bud destroying curry/ game of the year, Five Nights at Freddy’s, on your android phone. It is a game that requires vigilance as you assume the role of a night-time security guard at a pizza restaurant but you’re not trying to stop burglars and thieves from breaking in. Instead you’re trying to stop creepy animal animatronics from catching you off guard and, to quote the game, “probably try to forcefully stuff you inside a Freddy Fazbear suit.” You must constantly check the security cameras to make sure that they don’t reach you, as well as the doorways to the left and right of you and get (not very) reassuring phone calls from the exsecurity guard. But for a game as simple as this, who’d have thought it could be so nightmare inducing? The app version is very slightly different from the PC indie game that has terrified the gaming world and sparked a fad on Youtube, and that is because the nights on the app version are a few minutes shorter in real time. That doesn’t make it any less terrifying. The shorter nights mean that the animatronics are faster, causing you to have to check your cameras and doors more quickly than usual, as your heart beats at an alarming pace. Buy this app if you want to scare the crap out of you and your friends on the go, and perhaps get some very strange looks on the metro. As a cheap mobile version of the game, it’s well worth the money. Jack Taylor
atmosphere for its appeal and put it into a medium which can never communicate that to the same extent. Do we feel for Rose DaSilva the same anxiety when she staggers from set piece to set piece what we do for Harry Mason literally lost in the fog of an unfamiliar town? No, because she’s the one lost – not us. The problem here is detachment, and a non-interactive medium will never achieve the same level of immersion as an interactive one.
T
here’s a very stark dichotomy in horror: that which scares, and that which does not. There’s no particular scale to this – something either definitively is scary, to some extent, or its not. The simple reason for this is the creation of atmosphere, because if a horror establishes itself as scary then it will continue to be so, and will fail entirely if it doesn’t achieve this. And atmosphere is something at which games, more than anything else, excel. Put a person in front of a screen and you can tell them what they see; put them in a room, and they see it all for themselves. The glass corridors and bloodstained bathrooms of Bioshock contain more atmosphere in one room than the whole of Alien, purely because you can never explore the Nostromo nearly as much as you can pull Rapture apart and stare into its maddening heart for yourself. There’s a reason the Silent Hill films failed, and it’s not because Sean Bean survived them; they took a series which relies entirely on an oppressive, lonely
Ghosts of games past Keir Pulsford descends into the bizarre “horror” of Deadly Premonition
I
Ollie Burton provides us with a list of three of the spookiest video games that ever did spook
I
always thought that people who enjoyed getting scared were a little off. I feel that it’s a kind of pseudo-masochism, to get a thrill from being horrified. Little did I know I would eventually find myself among this growing community, seeking out the best horror movies and games to sate this lust for terror. Here’s a collection of the latter.
Resident Evil 4 To kick things off, let’s examine a well-known series first – Resident Evil. A franchise spanning more than 20 games and 6 movies, we get plenty of titles to choose from, but the standout entry is Resident Evil 4. Set in rural Spain, the player controls Leon S. Kennedy, a former Raccoon City police officer sent to rescue the President’s daughter. However, the villagers are less than welcoming and it transpires that a deadly parasite infestation is controlling the minds of the citizens. While few jump scares are present here, the game maintains a deep sense of foreboding and dread by limiting resources such as recovery items and ammunition, requiring the player to make tactical decisions about their applications. The soundtrack is also excellent and incredibly dynamic – the whisper-quiet passages will remind you how alone you truly are. In the game, of course. Not life.
-DPHV Games succeed on atmosphere above all
n this week’s Halloween-themed blast into the past I took a look at cult favourite Deadly Premonition, originally released in 2010 on the Xbox 360 by Access Games. Deadly Premonition is undeniably one of the most bizarre games out there. Large parts of the plot make no sense, the characters are deliriously barmy and you spend most of the game wandering why you are still playing this beautiful train wreck. If you look past the nonsense, completely inappropriate soundtrack and poor controls then what lies beneath is an absurdly fantastic experience. Due to the array of sheer oddness many players are put-off, or give up and don’t finish the game unfortunate souls - for the twist-upon-twist finale and heart-wrenching ending revelations are a joy to behold. I don’t blame them though, I almost gave up after 45 minutes into my first playthrough and was tempted to do the same during my recent return, but the game rewards your perseverance by becoming a lovely butterfly despite the questionable state of its shrivelled, smelly cocoon. A sad fact about Deadly Premonition is that it was visibly out-of-date the minute it was released. Development began in 2004 and the project was constantly scrapped, re-worked and altered from 2007
Top 3
until its eventual publication, without any graphical updates. Therefore the game looks like an average PlayStation 2 era release which only gets more noticeable with age. A more relevant title than Deadly Premonition would be “Twin Peaks: The Video Game” as it borrows so heavily from David Lynch’s classic early 90s TV show… Seemingly quiet town in rural America? Check. Suspicious townsfolk where nearly everyone is hiding something sinister? Check. FBI agent visiting the town to solve a murder? Check. Damn fine coffee? You better believe it. I didn’t discover Twin Peaks until after my original playthrough and I was quite disappointed upon replaying the game to realise the extent to which the TV programme is so blatantly copied. Being influenced by something is fine but many elements are outrageously lifted without remorse, safe to say Deadly Premonition would not get past Turn It In. A wonderful element of this survival horror is the sandbox nature of the game where exploration is encouraged and each character has their own daily schedule they abide by. Minigames like fishing are available to kill time in between zombie shooting and there are plenty of sidequests to keep you occupied. The driving controls aren’t great but the map is pretty big and there is plenty on offer within this little-known gem. However it’s not for everyone. In truth, it’s probably not even for most people. It is truly the Marmite of video games and even has a Guinness World Record for ‘Most Critically Polarising Survival Horror Game’ as people can’t decide if it’s sublime or substandard. In my own opinion, Deadly Premonition is so, so bad that’s it is absolutely awesome… which makes about as much sense as the game itself.
Fatal Frame 2: Crimson %XWWHUÀ \ I have had friends who literally can’t make it past the first ten minutes of this game without turning it off. Imagine the lovechild of Pokemon Snap and Luigi’s Mansion. Then throw that concept out the window and replace it with a terrifying version of Ghost Hunters. In this game the objective is to snap pictures of malevolent spirits using a device known as the Camera Obscura, and thus exorcising them from the village. This is far easier said than done however, given the propensity of the ghosts in question for killing you while you try. Jump scares abound here, this game actually serving as a nice counterpoint for the first entry in the list. Much more emphasis is based on many sudden scares rather than an ongoing fear – a nice difference and certainly something you’ll notice if you happened to have played both.
Clock Tower 3 The final entry here is actually my favourite horror game of all time. I find that the best games of this genre have come almost entirely from Japanese studios, and this is no different. Director Kenji Fukusaku collaborated with Capcom to produce a visually striking story of pure terror. Once you get past the ‘helpless Japanese girl’ trope, you actually find a gem of a game. Unlike more popular series such as Silent Hill or Resident Evil, we are given no weapons – no way of fighting back. You can only hide from the stalkers as they come ever closer, and cross your fingers that they don’t check your hiding place. Chilling environments are combined with a menacing soundtrack, ensuring you’ll remain on the edge of your seat from the first minute.
32.science&technology
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Science Editors: Laura Staniforth and Penny Polson Online Science Editor: Jack Marley
Zombiology 101 We sent our zombie researchers to investigate what’s plaguing popular media The Walking Dead
T
28 Days Later
The Last of Us
ombies. There are many types, shown in various films and TV shows. They’re fictional (for now), but what constitutes a zombie? How does one become a reanimated corpse, and how does the infection spread across the population? In Danny Boyle’s mind, director of 28 Days Later, it was caused by the appropriately named Rage Virus. The horror started in the Cambridge Primate Research Centre, where animal rights activists were determined to release the test subjects. A scientist desperately explained that the chimps have been given an inhibitor. They’re highly contagious and they’re infected. Infected with Rage. Despite the scientist’s warning, the protesters set free the disease-ridden apes. There, the first zombie was created.
ungal infections don’t just offend nasal passages that get too close to Athlete’s foot. Fungi reaches apocalyptic levels in the game The Last of Us as the source of infection for a zombie plague. Infection can be caused by inhalation of spores or being bitten by an infected individual.
Z
he Walking Dead has quickly become a very popular TV series, and every week over 17m people tune in to the post-apocalyptic horror. It is easy to see why you’d find this so entertaining if you were a fan of the Z word.
“So don’t get bitten!”
The actual zombies (or ‘walkers’) themselves adopt the stereotypical characteristics that many horror movies have created, however what makes The Walking Dead stand out is the modern twist on zombie-ism. So here is what you need to know about the science behind the zombies in The Walking Dead. #1. Zombie-ism is spread via a virus. #2. The virus is spread through open wounds (blood and bites). So don’t get bitten! #3. The virus uses the zombies as a reservoir. This means the virus can stay inside the zombies without causing them damage, until it is passed onto another host. #4. When someone is infected with the zombie virus, their adrenal glands hemorrhage, causing their brains and organs to shut down. However between 3 minutes to 8 hours after shut down, the brain stem reactivates. Bare in mind this is just the brain stem, meaning the zombie reanimates and can move, but the human part of the brain is still dead. This is where The Walking Dead’s big twist occurs. #5. Everyone is a carrier of the zombie virus. So if you die (and it doesn’t matter how), you become a zombie. This is scientifically confusing, but some people speculate that people turn when they get bitten due to a mixture of bacteria and virus’ in the zombies mouth creating a ‘zombie venom’. Even if the show does bend the rules of science for the sake of entertainment, I will still be watching.
“In director Danny Boyle’s mind it was caused by the appropriately named Rage Virus”
The virus lives within the blood and saliva of a host and can be transmitted through biting the target (the most violent yet most common method), or if the bodily fluids get inside the prey’s bloodstream. For example, a drop of blood landing in the eye, as one fateful subject discovers in the movie. Within a matter of seconds, the victim becomes highly aggressive, coupled with involuntary body movements and a desire for human flesh. The person they once were is gone, replaced by a terrifying creature with no recollection of the world around them. They only crave blood. Food. You. Max Barker
F
“Worryingly, it appears to be modelled on the very real Ophiocordyceps unilateralis that infects ants” The fungus grows within the brain tissue causing severe damage. The infected’s memories are erased and they act aggressively, seeking only to spread fungal spores. This indicates significant damage and modification to the Papez’s circuits, a neural highway between systems of the brain that helps create emotional memories. Worryingly, it appears to be modelled on the very real Ophiocordyceps unilateralis that infects ants. Upon infection the fungus alters their behaviour. The ant moves from the colony to optimal conditions for fungal growth. When reached the fungus induces the ant to attach its mandibles to plant material, a mechanism that kills the ant. Then a reproductive stalk extends from the deceased ant’s head bearing spores. The biochemical explanation for this is a neuromodulator cocktail that includes guanobutyric acid (GBA) and sphingosine. So if you’ve ever felt outsmarted by a particularly nasty test remember a brainless fungi can outsmart something with a brain. Let that be a reassurance? Alex Irvine Image: Nemo
Holly Pearson
Rise of the robot revolution
Are humans no longer required? Matthew Fisher takes on automated tech
O
ver the last 7000 years the human race has been building tools to reduce all kinds of physical labour. From technological developments in agriculture to the use of trucks and trains to transport goods, humans have created mechanical muscles to reduce the demand for human ones. Industrial robots have existed for some time; while highly efficient they are incapable of thinking for themselves. There’s been no threat of takeover due to them being only cost effective in narrow roles such as car manufacturing. Factory-based jobs, such as packing and sorting, are unable to be automated by these industrial robots. They’re unaware of their surroundings and wouldn’t be cost effective; they require skilled operators and cost millions of pounds. This is no longer the case. Baxter is an industrial robot built by Rethink Robotics. Unlike his predecessors, Baxter can learn what you want him to do by watching you do it. He isn’t pro-
grammed for one specific job and can manipulate anything within his reach. Therefore he is able to perform many manual tasks to the standard of his human competitors. Baxter is much cheaper than his older brothers at about £14,000, the average annual salary of many factory workers. However, Baxter doesn’t require holidays, he runs on pennies worth of electricity and he doesn’t sleep. It is easy to see how Baxter can take over thousands of unskilled jobs. Importantly, Baxter is the beginning of this form of robotics. Consider how computers were highly expensive until a cheap, general-purpose computer came along. Now, computers are vital to more or less everything and their incred-
“As mechanised muscles replaced their human counterparts, now mechanical minds will do the same for human minds”
ible demand makes them both cheaper and more powerful every year. Self-driving cars are another example of automating human brain labour. Salaries make up about one-third of the expenses of a transportation company and replacing drivers would save a
large proportion of these costs. Globally, about 70 million jobs are part of the transportation industry – potentially 70 million jobs that could be automated. In 2011 there were 200 road related deaths in the UK. Autonomous cars don’t blink, don’t text while driving or get sleepy at the wheel so it is easy to wonder if autonomous cars are better at driving
“Autonomous cars don’t blink, don’t text while driving or get sleepy at the wheel so it is easy to wonder if autonomous cars are better at driving than humans”
than humans. By May 2014, Google’s driverless car has already logged 700,000 miles accident free. As mechanised muscles replaced their human counterparts, now mechanical minds will do the same for human minds. Automation is a tool to create abundance with minimal effort. Due to its economic efficiency the automation of millions of humans jobs by robots is inevitable. Whether we like it or not, the robotic revolution is coming. We need to be prepared for a future where a large percentage of the population will be unemployable.
Illustrations: Amelia McTigue
The Courier
technology&science.33
Monday 27 October 2014
thecourieronline.co.uk/science c2.science@ncl.ac.uk | @courier_science
Horror stories from the laboratory A web of Anonymous researchers sent in their frightful tales of woe. Where did fear? they fall on our horror-o-meter? I’m a medical student and we were dissecting a person. Someone was cleaning some fat from the muscle and got a bit too vigorous, flinging the fat in the air. Right as someone happened to be yawning... Mortified Medic
There was a guy at our secondary school who wasn’t all that bright. So, when he was offered a quid to eat some copper sulphate he jumped at the chance. There was an ambulance. And a hospital trip. He never got his quid. Friend of Idiots
Image: Gordon Browne
I was attaching a data recorder to the dorsal fin of a shark. This involves creating two guide holes in the fin using hyperdermic needles. As I was holding the shark still with the needles through its fin, it started thrashing around to try and bite me. This led to me getting stabbed in the hand by the two needles when I didn’t get my hand out the way in time. The Shark Whisperer
It was a gloomy autumn day in my school biology class. Rats were laden across the benches, ready to be dissected. I carefully pinned back the limbs of my own rat and after prying open the abdomen, I inspected the internal organs, before removing them all. After that, I made my way to the braincase. As I repositioned the limbs, I saw, out the corner of my eye, something move. I repeated my action, and saw the rat’s claw clench like a cage door closing over its prisoner. My arm hairs stuck straight up and after a pause, I continued dissecting. Writhing Rodent
The data was non-parametric. Shocked Statistician Image: Nemo
I was dissecting a pig’s eyeball at school, and I think I cut in too far. It deflated, and black goop came out of the incision. It was pretty gross. Made a pig’s ear of it
Whilst using a Bunsen burner to heat up a test tube (attached to a clamp stand with a rubber coating), and thought we could make the task quicker by lifting up the Bunsen to be closer to the test tube. This resulted in the whole clamp stand being set on fire and, since it was covered in rubber, it smelt awful. Our teacher had to put it out with a fire blanket. Foolish Firestarter
Illustration: Becky Irvine
Whale of the Week - Halloween Edition BOO-luga whale (Delphinapterus leucas)
Illustration by Becky Irvine
Chris Lovell spins a story about why we’re so afraid of spiders
H
aving recently removed my first spider from my latest accommodation, I couldn’t help but reflect upon how lucky the little guy had been as he entered the room. If he had found his way over to the room to my right, he would have immediately been destroyed under a sea of expletives and objects not meant to be supported by its tiny frame. Don’t get me wrong, I find spiders creepy and would never touch one voluntarily, but imagining these two contrasting reactions had me thinking. What is it within a person that inspires such terror and hatred towards a harmless animal? It turns out the answer is quite complicated. The conditioning argument suggests that in the past, you had an encounter with a spider that changed your perception of them forever. The problem is that this event could have happened when you were too young to remember it. One grisly anecdote I found involved a baby crying to his mother because a spider had decided to scale Mt. Baby, but when the mother arrived, unable to find the source of her child’s distress, she left the spider to its own devices. It’s easy to imagine how such an event might imprint terror upon an individual, but what if we suppose that no such encounter occurred?
“What is it within a person that inspires such terror and hatred towards a harmless animal?”
Perhaps fear of spiders had an evolutionary advantage? There are only around a dozen species of spider worldwide that are harmful to humans, but considering children are more susceptible to these venoms, arachnophobia may have saved lives in the past. From an environmental perspective, spiders are rarely portrayed positively in the media. Well-loved characters from our favourite series devolve into quivering wrecks in the face of them, and then there are attention-grabbing headlines in the media like “Massive, deadly spider now on UK shores!!!” So could arachnophobia be a product of genetic or environmental factors? To investigate this, one study attempted to compare the fear responses of twins, which despite being genetically identical, were exposed to different environmental conditions during their adult lives. The study found that responses to fear-inducing images were similar in both twins, suggesting that arachnophobia may be inherited.
Interestingly, arachnophobia sufferers not only fear spiders but this fear appears to warp the perception of those who suffer from it. For example, individuals may overestimate the size of a spider or underestimate the time it would take for a spider to reach them. Additionally, the degree of this error seems to correlate with the strength of the individual’s fear response. So to you arachnophobes out there I say this: as the weather becomes a chillier for our eight-legged friends and they begin to seek out the nooks and crannies of your various homes; if it’s any consolation- they’re probably not as big or as fast as you think they are. So, good luck!
The Courier
35.puzzles
Monday 27 October 2014
Puzzles 1
2
3
4
8
5
6
5
Puzzles Editor: Kate Bennett
Courier Catch- phrase
See if you can guess (catch) the common idiom (phrase) shown in these picture combos?
7
9
10
11 9
12 13 16
15 18
14
“I’m Roy Walker and I heartily endorse this event and/or product”
17 20
19 21
23
22
25
Across
1 across & 2 down Danish film director behind Drive and Pusher (7, 11) 8 Demon that has sex with women while they sleep; shit 90s rock band who are inexplicably still releasing music (7) 9 Germanic alphabet made of straight lines (5) 10 Milk sugar (7) 11 Chasing game played by children (3) 12 Long period of time (3) 14 Julian _ _ _ _, British pop artist (4) 16 Sisters of _ _ _ _ _, 80s goth band 18 Pots (4) 20 Starchy foodstuff beloved of students (5) 22 Spider (8) 23 Antagonist in Toy Story 2 (4) 25 Slang for hick (7) 26 Stuff we breathe; French electro band (3)
For even more news, views, sports and culture, make sure you head over to thecourieronline. co.uk
24
8
26
2 8
Down
1 Complain (6) 2 See 1 across 3 Idiot (8) 4 Enthusiasm (5) 5 Eagle’s nest (5) 6 1st gen. Pokemon, resembling a fox with many appendages (9) 7 Face; 80s synthpop band (6) 13 Poisonous plant, also known as wolf ’s bane (7) 15 Relatively wealthy Russian peasants, purged during the Revolution (6) 16 Feminine title; neurological disease (2) 17 Black and white mammal, surprisingly vicious (6) 19 Town in south Wales (5) 20 Ratio of a circle’s circumference to its diameter (2) 21 Shouted by pirates (4) 24 Country in North America (3)
Word Link
9
9 2
3 2 4 2 7 5 7 9 4 9
1 8 9 8 7 4 4 3
4 2 6
Roll
Baby
Shoes
_ _ _ _ _
Find the word that con- nects these three words. Hint: Often found at children’s parties
1
36.sportfeatures
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Mighty strikers gain immortality Sports Editor Jonty Mawer headed to Manchester to see two of Newcastle’s favourite sons, Alan Shearer and Hughie Gallacher, enter the National Football Museum Hall of Fame Last Thursday marked a very special day for Newcastle United as three of the club’s legendary centre forward’s were inducted into the NFM Hall of Fame. Alan Shearer, Hughie Gallacher and Michael Owen are certainly names that are already immortalized in the club’s folklore, however, this recent accolade puts them in the pantheon of the greatest ever players to play in English football, a notably titanic achievement. On arrival, Shearer remarked that this award ranks amongst the best of his career. In an exclusive interview with the Courier, he mentioned that it was an incredibly special honour, particularly due to the recognition he received from players he used to play against. The Hall of Fame, the brainchild of the National Football Museum (formerly based in Preston North End but now at the Urbis Centre in central Manchester) and the PFA, works on a voting process conducted by all of its members annually. For a player to be voted in, not only does he or she have to be a player of exceptional quality, but also has to have played five or more seasons in English Football and be retired. Due to Shearer’s outstanding record in the Premier League, to this day he remains the League’s highest and most prolific goal scorer with 260 goals, it seemed only a matter of time before his induction would take place. What was most extraordinary about the evening for Shearer, he admitted, was the fact that being voted into the Hall of Fame alongside him was a childhood hero of his, the phenomenally gifted Hughie Gallacher. Gallacher’s name carries with it a mystic quality around these parts; whilst at the club he scored 143 league and cup goals in 174 appearances with a strike rate of 82%, the best in the club’s prestigious history. First signed in 1928 for £6,500, Gallacher made an immediate impact scoring two goals in his first game for the Magpies. To this day, he remains one of the only players to score 5 goals in four different matches and is on a very exclusive list of players to have scored over 200 goals in the English top flight, an undeniable achievement. Alongside Shearer, Gallacher is considered by aficionados to be the best player to have ever worn to famous black and white stripes due to his insatiable ability to score goals. Indeed, Frank Swift, a legend in his own right, described Gallacher as “the greatest centre forward” he ever player against and that he had “more tricks than a
Photography: National Football Museum
bucketful of monkeys”. Unfortunately for the Gallacher family, however, the circumstances of Hughie’s untimely and tragic death will always to a degree mar the glorious nature of his sporting success. Due to his suicide in 1957, an event which evoked considerable feelings of mourning throughout English football, Gallacher’s legacy arguably has been tarnished, particularly in light of accusations of child abuse held against him by his second son Matthew Gallacher in the period just before his death. Matthew, who attended the Hall of Fame event to accept the award on behalf of his father, described this decoration as a “mark of recognition from the football fraternity”, and a tremendous honour for both his father and his family as a
whole. Shearer, who went up on stage to present the award seemed very moved and recounted that his father told him, when only a young boy, that no matter how hard he tried, or how much he trained, he was never going to be as good as Hughie Gallacher, a touching tip of the hat to his footballing idol. Shearer and Gallacher were not, however, the only legends of the game
Paralympian Matt Dimbylow all took their place amongst English Football’s elite. One player, particularly for Newcastle United and Liverpool supporters, drew the most attention: former Galactico and England prodigy Michael Owen. Before the former striker came up on stage, they played a montage of his greatest goals, the most famous of which being the solo effort against Ar-
inducted in to the Hall of Fame on Thursday evening; Patrick Viera, Trevor Francis, Jimmy McIlroy, legendary women’s footballer Sylvia Gore and
gentina. Despite regular injury and multiple long-term absences from the game, Owen remains one of the outstanding players that England has ever produced.
“In an evening that remembered and commemorated the truly great footballers, Newcastle United FC featured most prominently; a testament to the club’s heritage and prowess”
Photography: National Football Museum
One of only four English players to ever win the prestigious Balon D’or, Owen went on to play for Real Madrid before signing for Newcastle in 2005. On stage, Dan Walker, the BBC Sport presenter hosting the event, asked Owen whether he knew at a young age that he would be destined for sporting greatness, to which he simply replied; “Yes”. His answer was clean, slick, and to the point; the mark of a true professional. In an evening that remembered and commemorated the truly great footballers, Newcastle United FC featured most prominently; a testament to the club’s heritage and prowess. One must hope that a few of the current crop of players can reach the lofty heights of their forbears in future years.
Photography: National Football Museum
The Courier
sportfeatures.37
Monday 27 October 2014
The best of times, the cursed of times With Halloween knocking on our doors, The Courier inspects the most spooky hoodoos to have ever haunted unfortunate teams and players
The Baseball Ground Gypsy Jinx Excuse the attempt at a pun but this was truly an event of nightmarish qualities that for years in the early 19th century Derby County fans had to endure. Rumour has it that a curse had been placed upon the club by a group of Romani gypsies. Supposedly, the gypsies were angry at being forced to move from their homes in order for Derby’s stadium to be built. According to a “reliable” Derby County folk tale, the curse was set in order to prevent Derby from winning the FA Cup. During the early years of their residence at Baseball Ground, the curse appeared to be very successful. The club reached the semi-finals of the FA Cup a staggering thirteen times (unlucky for some) between 1895-1909. To add insult to injury, on the occasions of 1898, 1899 and 1903 the club reached the final. On all three occasions, they failed to conquer, even suffering a notable 6-0 defeat to Bury in the 1903 showdown. Now, perhaps the curse thought it would give Derby County fans a break from embarrassment and failure as the club did not reach another final until
%HQ¿ FD¶V HQGOHVV QLJKWPDUH
Photography: Getty
1946 against Charlton Athletic. There are various rumours as to how the club tried to lift the curse: firstly, that the club’s board took extreme precautions and arranged to meet with some Romani gypsies in an attempt to lift the curse; and secondly, that the Derby County captain paid a gypsy a substantial amount of money in order to persuade them to lift the curse. I’ll let you decide which you want to believe. Judgment day. With the match poised
The Bambino Curse In 1918, the Boston Red Sox won their fifth World Series in baseball, the most by any club at the time. One of the stars of this successful Boston franchise was Babe Ruth, also known as ‘The Bambino’. Two years later, in 1920, the Red Sox sold Ruth to New York Yankees for $100,000. The previously lacklustre
game. The most recent near miss was in 1986 as the Boston franchise threw away an early 3-0 lead in the seventh game, only to lose 8-5. It wasn’t until 2004, after an 86-year wait, that the Red Sox finally managed to break the jinx beating the Cardinals in the World Series.
Yankees went on to become one of the greatest success stories in sport, winning 26 World Series having never previously won a single one. Superstition surrounding the sale continued to grow with the success of the Yankees and the decline of the Red Sox who failed to win a Series for the rest of the twentieth century. The Red Sox came close on four occasions but each time lost in the deciding seventh
The curse became such a large part of Boston culture that a ‘reverse curve’ road sign on Longfellow Bridge was graphitized to read ‘Reverse the Curse’ and this was left by officials until after the Red Sox won in 2004. After the victory, the road sign was edited to read ‘Curse Reversed’ in celebration. Michael Slack
at 1-1 the ball freakily burst. This is the moment Derby County fans believe their curse was broken. The team went on to win 4-1 and lift the FA Cup. The long running gypsy curse was finally lifted, the poltergeists of Baseball Ground had left and the pre-match rituals could come to an end. Whether the curse was real or not, it certainly had Derby County fans sleeping with the light on and looking over their shoulders for many years. Lynsey Brownlie
record breaking season. The first victim was Garrison Hearst. The original cover-boy broke his ankle in post-season, ruling him out for two seasons. More injuries and significant dips in form from others meant fans started to take note of the ‘Madden curse’. The curse was sealed as it began to delve into players’ private lives. Madden 2004 featured Michael Vick who broke his fibula in pre-season be-
Photography: Getty
Photography: Spiegel
it viciously scarred the Portuguese folklore. Now, 52 years later, Benfica has lost eight consecutive European finals, five in the European Cup and three in the UEFA/Europa League competitions, with the first of them coming in 1963, straight after the mythical fallout. For many, including Benfica current manager Jorje Jesus, the Bela Guttmann curse appears to be nothing more than an amusing fable. Still, perhaps Beto did not save these penalties entirely on his own. Peter Georgiev
A Deal with the Devil
Photography: Getty
The Australian national football team has never had the greatest of luck on the big stage and perhaps it has something to do with the unorthodox staff at the Socceroos camp. According to Johnny Warren who made 42 appearances for Australia the men down under hired a witch doctor to curse their opponents in the 1970 World Cup qualifiers in an attempt to improve the squad’s chances of making it through to the biggest competition in sport. At first, the move seemed to have paid off after a 3-1 victory albeit against the even less fancied Rhodesia. This is when things got spooky. According to Warren’s autobiography Sheilas, Wogs and Poofters, when the Socceroos were unable to pay the £1000 fee for the spell-craftsman, the sorcerer turned the curse upon the Australians
themselves. Yugoslavian manager Joe Vlatsis’ men went on to lose their vital fixture against Israel 2-1 over two legs sending them crashing out of the competition - with three players becoming ill during play. Over 30 years later, the Australian comic John Safran, famous for producing comedy pilots such as “John Safran: Media Tycoon”, voyaged to Africa in 2002 to reverse the curse. After having a chicken slaughtered next to him and being sprayed with its blood by the witch doctor’s descendent, the act was complete. Safran’s expedition saw the tides turn as Australia qualified for the 2004 World Cup, and even made it to the second round - their best ever result. Maybe magic does exist? Alex Hendley
7KH &UXFLEOH &XUVH
The Cover-boy Burden In 1999, Madden redesigned its cover to include a star NFL player. However, after several horrific injuries, notable downturns in form and a few court cases later, appearances on the cover of the Madden series has been declassified from an honour to a curse. So far, 17 players who have appeared on the cover have suffered as a result with only a few coming away unscathed or, in the case of curse beater Calvin Johnston, with a
If you are unfortunate enough to love both Benfica and superstitions, there is one person who keeps troubling your sleep lately. Béla Guttmann is one of the few football managers to have coached more than 20 teams in his career. However, neither of them has suffered from his dismissal as severely as The Eagles. In 1959, Guttmann shockingly embarked on his adventure with Benfica after arriving from bitter rivals Porto whom he led to the championship title in the previous season. In the next few years, the Hungarian specialist transformed the red club into a dominant giant lifting two back-to-back European Cups in 1961 and 1962. Nevertheless, this triumph would prove to be a double-edged sword when afterwards Guttmann reasonably demanded a pay raise. To his unpleasant surprise, the board rejected his request and saw him leave the club furious with their decision. Although the Hungarian’s last words still remain unknown, according to the widespread legend, the manager said: “Not in a hundred years from now will Benfica ever be European champion”. At that moment, the evil jinx might have sounded ludicrous but with time
fore being found to have taken part in illegal dog fighting and sentenced to 23 months in prison whilst having to reimburse the Atlanta Falcons $19.97 million of his $37 million bonus. Vick wasn’t the only star that found himself on the wrong side of the law. Brett Favre returned from retirement after appearing in 2009 only achieving poor performances and a sexual harassment probe. Just last month, the star of the 2014 cover, Adrian Peterson was indicted for beating his child with a tree branch. In 2007, LaDainian Tomlinson snubbed the chance to be on the front of Madden citing ‘contractual reasons’. However, this was unlikely owing to Tomlinson being under huge pressure to reject the opportunity. Fans even went to the extent of setting up ‘SaveLTfromMadden.com’ to fend off the curse. This seemed to be successful as the 2008 version of Madden displayed not Tomlinson, but Vince Young. Cornerback Richard Sherman appears on the newly released Madden 15 but quickly announced “I don’t believe in the curse, I believe in God” as he looks to help the Seahawks do what hasn’t been done before and retain the Super Bowl. Matthew Flannery
In the world of Snooker, becoming a world champion at the Crucible, ‘The Theatre of Dreams’, for the first time is a moment that many players aspire to. However, winning it the first time has historically meant the crown has not been defended. Since the World Championship was moved to the Crucible in 1977, no first time winner has successfully defended their crown. Of the fifteen first time champions, four have fallen in the first round, two in the second round, four in the quarter-finals, three in the semifinals and four finished as runners-up. This includes so many Snooker greats such as Stephen Hendry (‘91, quarter finals), Steve Davis (‘82, first round), John Higgins (‘99, semi-finals), Peter Ebdon being defeated by the late Paul Hunter in 2003, the now disgraced Shaun Murphy (‘06, quarter-finals) and even Ronnie ‘The Rocket’ O’Sullivan who suffered a loss to Stephen Hendry in the 2002 semi-finals. The most recent victim is Neil Robertson who dropped out at the first hurdle beaten by Judd Trump on the youngster’s memorable journey to the final in 2011. However, there have been consecutive successes at the world championships but as highlighted all these players
Photography: Getty
had experienced this ‘curse’. The latest back-to-back triumphs at the Crucible come from O’Sullivan (2012 and 2013). Once you’ve enjoyed the jubilation of success at the Crucible for the first time, your hopes of enjoying that feeling 12 months later are unlikely. Recent form suggests you would be lucky to get past your first opponent. Though having won his first world title in May, Mark Selby will be hoping to break this ‘curse’ in 2015. Michael Rowan
38.sportbucs
Monday 27 October 2014
The Courier
Two good, two bad for NUNC Women’s Netball
By Abi Dodwell in Sheffield NUNC 1sts 31-47 Leeds Met 1sts In one of the best quality games of netball Newcastle has ever participated in, the Firsts played an excellent match
cially, when she was faced by one of the tallest goalkeepers that Newcastle has ever seen. Farah Hasan was also key in attack as she moved well and communicated with Emily whilst scoring consistently as well. The whole team’s fitness was obvious as even up until the last few seconds as tips and steals were still being made. This determination meant that although the team came out with a loss in the end they won the last quarter and never let their heads drop.
“Blood was even spilt on the court when Hattie Grant got on the wrong side of her opponent’s teeth” despite the result. Alice Hagyard described the first quarter as ‘very intense’ with fierce ‘man on man marking all down the court’. But the team powered through their tough opponents and put up a great fight. Blood was even spilt on court when Hattie Grant got on the wrong side of her opponent’s teeth, but scarred she carried on making great tips and interceptions. As the game progressed, it was clear that Leeds Met rarely made an error, but any slip up made was picked up by the incredible defence Mia Archer and Jasmine Whitlock. Emily Whiteside’s shooting was as strong as ever as she put up shot after shot and made her team proud. Espe-
NUNC 2nds 48 - 20 Hull 1sts Another successful week from Newcastle University’s 2nd team as they thrash Hull with a 48-20 victory. The match began with a very tight start as each team fought tooth and nail to keep their own centres. But thanks to great pressure all down the court, tips were made and converted into goals. These excellent interceptions meant that Newcastle came out of the first quarter up by one goal. When it came to the second quarter it was as if fire had been lit under the team and they dominated the game from that point. With Georgia St
Rose once again holding great control of the game as she defended effectively up the court whilst still having the energy to feed perfectly into the defenders Sadie Neve and Annie Bolle-Jones made it nearly impossible for the shooters to score as they were consistently tipping and intercepting at every given opportunity. The tactic which made the game such a storming success was the impeccable defence all down the court from every single player which halted Hull’s set plays and centre passes. A great win from the seconds and already it looks like they have a fantastic season ahead of them. NUNC 3s 24-41 Leeds Uni 2nds As Newcastle faced Leeds 3rds, it was clear that the match was going to be fierce just from watching the warm-up as both teams did their best to intimidate each other. The first quarter flew by as the fluidity of the team meant the ball sailed down court and into Newcastle’s goal effortlessly giving them one goal lead heading into the second quarter. As the whistle was blown, the game began to heat up and Leeds started to get their heads into it. But Chloe Tindale did her best to delay any ball from the opposition and made countless steals allowing Newcastle to keep their game strong. As
RUWFC complete comeback Women’s Rugby Newcastle 1sts
32
Birmingham 1sts
17
By Catherine Sanderson at Cochrane Park Newcastle were optimistic on the long bus journey down to Birmingham despite a delayed departure because of a fencing lad who was running late. Birmingham agreed to push kick off back to 2:30 and after a short, sharp warm up Newcastle were ready to play. A strong catch from the kick-off saw Newcastle take an early lead with some
strong picks from the forwards before the ball was shipped out to winger Lauren Wallace for the first try of the match. This was then converted by forward Tasha Robson in her first ever conversion. The Newcastle side was buzzing and after a brilliant clearance kick from fresher Olivia Hart, the second try was scored by hooker Cassie Jordan. Birmingham came back more determined than ever. After a lot of penalties from Newcastle, Birmingham managed to score some tries. The half time score was 12-17 to Birmingham. After some strong words from the coach, Newcastle entered the second half inspired to chase a turnaround. The forwards managed to steal several balls from scrums and lineouts and forward Elle Bloor made some massive tackles crushing the Birmingham’s confidence.
With several good runs, Bloor managed to capitalise on her efforts with a try equalizing the score at 17-17. The next try came quickly with Robson smashing through several tackles to score in the corner. A substitution saw back Sarah Barker moved from wing to centre where she made yards with her amazing pace and footwork. Newcastle’s fifth try was scored by prop Catherine ‘Bruiser’ Sanderson who picked from the back of a ruck and smashed through two defenders to score her first ever try. Finally, number 9 Nina Close surprised everyone including herself with a brilliant catch from the kick-off resulting in a closing try from Olly Critchly. Thus, the Newcastle ended the game at 32-17 to claim a vital victory.
Leeds began to pull away their score, it simply highlighted Newcastle’s skill as the quality of play went to the next level. In the third quarter, Charlotte Pickard put immense pressure on her shooter often causing her to fumble or miss her shot which guaranteed Newcastle the rebound as Charlotte would win every
the team as the defence worked hard together to only concede 4 goals in the first quarter whilst shooters Jess Wheeler and Steph Garfield gave Newcastle a great lead with 12 goals. The momentum continued to build throughout the game as Newcastle never took a pass for granted and chased every loose ball and
“Chloe Tindale did her best to delay the opposition and made countless steals to allow Newcastle to keep their game strong” loose ball. By the end of the third quarter, Newcastle were down 32-20, but this score in no way dampened their spirits as Olivia Gordon continued to score whenever the ball touched her hands. In the final quarter, the game was still just as fierce as when it had begun as Newcastle made the most of every fumble by the opposition and converted it to a goal. It truly was a great game from the 3rd team and a solid effort from every single player. NUNC 4s 46-25 Huddersfield 1sts An absolutely brilliant game from the 4ths this week as they come away with a 46-25 win against Huddersfield University’s 1st team. It was a strong start from
made the most of any mistakes Huddersfield made. Sophie Houghton was crucial in the movement out of defence as she asserted herself and got free for every single back and side line ball. The play remained strong throughout the team as Isa Telford always fought to stay one step ahead of her WD and run her out the game. The 4ths held their strong lead all through the game and came out with a fantastic score that they should all be very proud of. Player of the match Jess Wheeler was on form the whole game barely missing a shot and chasing every rebound. Even up until the last second, the team fought as if it were still the first quarter and this attitude allowed them to finish the game with such an impressive result.
Owls suffer home blow
Men’s Rugby League Newcastle 1sts
10
Leeds Beckett 1sts
23
By George Clarke at Heaton With only a handful of defeats in the last nine years, a Cup and League double every year since 2005 and an average score line of 58.6 to 6.2 in their last ten games, it seem that welcoming Leeds Beckett Baboons (formerly Leeds Metropolitan Melts) to Heaton would have been a tough afternoon for the AU’s most cherished and beloved. Fortunately for the Owls, this wasn’t to be with Herculean captain Andreas
Shortly after the break, cuddly prop Craparos-Midwood crossed to the jubilation of the club’s most dedicated and loyal ‘Ultraz’. With a Newcastle leading 10-6, Beckett hit back in more ways than one through another flukey try and when the Leeds centre struck Öneill with an elbow to the jaw, a fracas ensued. Highland received 10 minutes in the sin bin for his poor punching technique, which was an enormous miscarriage of justice. A 13-year-old referee was probably not the best choice of arbitrator for the clash by the sport’s governing body as he seemingly forgot the most basic rules of the sport including missing numerous Beckett knock-ons, forward passes and offside infringements that even Helen Keller would’ve seen. To the groans of fans, Beckett pursued with kicking penalties and drop
“A 13-year-old referee was probably not the best choice for an arbitrator for the clash as he seemingly forgot the most basic rules”
Photography: Catherine Sanderson
Zeus leading from the front and getting stuck in to the Baboon’s pack. Alongside him in the engine room were comrades D.Bowzer who dictated play against his plumper and intellectually inferior opposite number. Bowzer spread the ball to the likes of Thomas Welly, Dani Craparos-Midwood and Barry Figtree, who worked hard in order to benefit the masses like true Marxists. New half-back pair of Barrington Levy and Mattheus Öneill linked with Charles Highland who grubbered through for T.T Josh to swoop as he scored Owls’ first. Beckett responded as their low-IQed Loose Forward tripped over his shoelaces for a score.
goals for the ensuing twenty minutes, as spectators fell asleep with their laborious, boring, rugby union-esque gameplan, organised by their neanderthalic half-back. At 17-10 with ten minutes to go Dan Longman, Alec Leahy and Steve Jainey all came close to scoring but it wasn’t to be. A last gasp try was given as the Beckett players gave numerous ‘gifts’ to the ref such as popping candy, a copy of Match magazine and a colouring-in book. The Owls can hold their beaks high, however, with six regular firstteamers out and with Hull away next week they should be back to winning ways in no time.
The Courier
sportbucs.39
Monday 27 October 2014
Volley girls spike their way to victory Newcastle University Women’s Volleyball team followed up last week’s 3-0 success away at Lancaster 1st’s with another impressive victory, claiming a 3-1 win against Liverpool 1st’s. Starting the day joint top of the Northern 1A BUCS league, the game between Newcastle and Liverpool was always
skilled, it was always unlikely Newcastle were going to have it all their own way, despite the ferocious start. Liverpool began to pull away from the hosts, taking the score to 5-9 and then 6-13 as they really began to take a hold of the first set. The away side were playing some blistering volleyball, with the agile no. 15 setting up numerous chances for the rotating players at the net to thrash some stunning spikes into the Newcastle court. The home side’s no. 9, Petra Adamova, was lethal at the net with her spikes thumping balls into the Liverpool players and court for the whole afternoon, as the score rose to 12-17 in no time and it became apparent that Liverpool
going to be a fiercely fought, close run game of volleyball. With plenty of optimism swimming around the Sports Hall following opening week wins, both teams were raring to go on Wednesday afternoon as a crowd gathered to watch the top of the table clash. Liverpool started the game well, taking the lead through their no. 17 who was lively all game, but the home side wasted no time in stamping some authority on the opening minutes of the match - taking the score to 3-1 with the help of an ace from the no. 10. With both teams being so highly
had the initiative in the first set. Though Newcastle battled on, it was the away side that took it by a comfortable scoreline of 16-25, however the players and coaches alike knew the home side had more to offer. In the second set Newcastle upped their game, but the score remained very level for the opening minutes reaching 5-5 and 11-11 as both teams struggled to dominate the game, such was the quality of the digs and blocks that prevented either side stretching their lead much further than a point or two. However, as the game went on Newcastle improved
Women’s Volleyball Newcastle
3
Liverpool 1sts
1
By Alex Hendley at The Sports Centre
“A key factor in the following two sets was how often Newcastle forced the talented Liverpool side into errors”
Photography: Alex Hendley
by the minute, creeping the score up to 15-11, as the home crowd felt sure the second set was in their grasp. Liverpool managed to pull it back to 15-15, and later 20-19 as they refused to roll over to a resurgent Newcastle side after the first set defeat. The home side took the second set 25-19 to level the set scores, and never looked back as they relentlessly out-spiked and overpowered the visitors for the remainder of the game. A key factor in the following two sets
was how often Newcastle forced the talented Liverpool side into errors, such as striking the ball into the net or being pressured into inaccurate shots which flew harmlessly out of the court. Newcastle took the third set 25-20 in another hard fought victory, to take them 2-1 in front and into a surge of form for the fourth set which would win them the game and put them top of the league. And they made easy work of the final set, capping off the afternoon with a 25-
18 victory which saw the game finish 3-1 overall, as a dogged Liverpool side were able to relax after being bombarded by the tenacious Newcastle ladies all game, and they should be proud in defeat after a sterling performance in the Sports Centre. Newcastle have six points out of six in the BUCS league, and play away at Manchester Universtity 2nd’s next Wednesday in the Sugden Sports Centre.
Newcastle give Hallam a good kicking Women’s Football Newcastle 1sts
2
Sheffield Hallam 2nds
1
By Calum Wilson at Cochrane Park Following an astonishing 11-1 opening week thrashing of Teesside University, you might have expected a complacent start from Newcastle. However, against a very strong Sheffield Hallam 2nd team they rose to the challenge and earned themselves a hard fought victory and an early season top spot in Northern League 2B. The stage was set, on a very cold and windy afternoon at Cochrane Park, for a tight, scrappy affair and so it proved for the full ninety minutes. The Englishstyle long ball game meant both sides kept warm with lots of running, whilst the coach, the substitutes and myself shivered on the sideline. The first real opportunity of the game came from a long pass. Winger Ellie Mitchell recovered back to win the ball and play it over the top to striker Esme Richards, whose pace caused problems to the Sheffield defence on multiple occasions. Having got in behind, the resulting shot was under hit and easily cleared by the visiting keeper. Newcastle’s defensive line, lead by captain Rosa Evans, was impressive throughout and not often tested. A rare Sheffield attack on 17 minutes forced a smart near post save from keeper, Holly Jenkins. From the resulting corner, there was a small melee and as the ball broke free it was prodded just over off a Sheffield boot. The deadlock was eventually broken
four minutes later when Esme Richards raced through again one on one with the keeper, this time making no mistake with a simple placed finish to put the home side ahead. The assist credited to fellow forward Justine Lee, who worked tirelessly to link up the midfield to the dangerous Richards. The ten minutes that followed the goal saw little action with neither team able to mount any serious pressure. The game certainly didn’t lack competitiveness; a number of strong challenges flying in as both tried and failed to get a hold of possession. Goal scorer Esme Richards then had three chances in as many minutes to double the hosts’ lead. On 33 minutes, the hardworking Mitchell made room on the left hand side to swing in an inviting ball across the face of goal, but neither Richards nor Emilie Coutin, arriving from right wing, could get on the end of it. A minute later, Richards got one on one with the last defender, and full of confidence, took her on and, cutting inside, worked enough space on the edge of the 18-yard box to test the Sheffield number one. In almost identical fashion to the opening goal, Richards found herself in behind the defence following a long ball over the top. Choosing to strike it first time, the effort seemed to be heading for the top corner before being parried by the visiting keeper. The rebound fell to the feet of number nine, Lee, but unable to control the bounce, the ball rolled harmlessly wide for a goal kick. The visitors grew more into the game in the second half. A momentary lapse of concentration at the back allowed the Sheffield Hallam strikers to combine and after a neat flick on, Jenkins in goal was forced to make her second important save of the afternoon. As the match became increasingly stretched and players tired, Newcastle
looked to their bench to freshen up the midfield, bringing on Suzanne Roodenburg and Claudia Wilson, to replace Coutin and Demi Mullen. The home side were reminded of their slender lead on a couple of occasions as Sheffield carved out a series of half chances. The visitors were made to pay for their missed opportunities on 72 minutes. Ellie Mitchell’s left foot doing the damage, an in-swinging free kick from the right hand side deflected of a Sheffield leg, catching the goalkeeper flat footed as the ball trickled over the line. Feeling the strain of a hard afternoon’s work up and down the left flank, Mitchell was immediately withdrawn with cramp and replaced by Eimear McKenna. Rather than sit comfortably at 2-0, the hosts then seemed to lose focus slightly as Sheffield came back into the game. Sloppy defending allowed a visiting striker to waltz through one on one with relative ease and with a calm placed finish, bring the score back to 2-1, with 5 minutes left on the clock. As Sheffield pushed forward, they were undone by a swift counterattack, but Justine Lee hit her shot straight at the keeper. Led by the ever-consistent Rosa Evans at the back, Newcastle continued to hold on to the one goal margin. The visitors managing only one real scare at the end, as a flick-on from a 90th minute corner was cleared off the line. In the confusion that followed, there were a few half-hearted appeals for a handball, which were quickly dismissed by the referee. The home side held on and now boast a very early season spot at the top of British Universities and College Sports (BUCS) Northern League 2B. Captain Rosa Evans told the Courier after the game of her pride: “They stuck at it against a tough opposition and came away with the three points”.
Photography: Calum Wilson
Sport
www.thecourieronline.co.uk Monday 27 October 2014 Issue 1297 Free
thecourieronline.co.uk/sport
Sports Editors: Peter Georgiev, Jonty Mawer & Huezin Lim Online Sports Editor: Josh Nicholson courier.sport@ncl.ac.uk | @Courier_Sport
Newcastle 2-4 Northumbria
SHEARER ENTERS HALL OF FAME
P.36 SPORTING CURSES
Poly golfers drive a wedge between Uni and triumph By Tom Purvis at Matfen Hall On a cold and blustery day that would have troubled any sports team, Newcastle University Golf 1sts, despite showing heart and resiliency, lost a closely fought encounter to Northumbria University 2nds 2 to 4. It’s been a difficult journey for the Newcastle club since their promotion to the Northern Premier in 2009/10, particularly considering the competition. Being pitted against the statue and imposition of Loughborough, Durham and Birmingham 1sts proved too difficult a struggle, as the team was relegated without recording a single win. The following year was no better for the club as they faced the dreadful prospect of double relegation confiding them to the Northern Conference 2B. Despite a promising 2nd place in the 2011/12 season, things haven’t got much better for the club since that first relegation with graduations and a lack of fundamental organization. The prospect of facing last year’s runners-up, as well as fierce local rivals, Northumbria 2nds was certainly unnerving. This, however, was a different Newcastle team; they were playing off a combined handicap that was 16 shots lower than last year and were reinvigorated by good recruitment in September. Moreover, with a new, more focused committee, many are tipping this year’s golf 1sts as a favourite for promotion back to Northern Conference 1A. If there was a game to
test Newcastle’s resurgence credentials, this was it. Northumbria 2nds had only lost two out of their last six games. First out for Newcastle was the Captain, Daniel White. A recent addition to the University’s elite athlete scholarship scheme, White took a commanding two-hole lead against Northumbria’s lead-out Adam Mottershead. White, playing as a captain should, took immediate control for the majority of the course. Despite the early commanding lead, two boggies on the 17th and 18th hole cost him the match allotting Northumbria a 1-0 lead. The main story of the day, however, came in the other half of the first pairing when 1st year architect Ben Church
match seemed to be drifting ominously towards a draw. On the 16th,, however, his luck seemed to turn. Three brilliant approach shots, finishing in a beautifully executed putt from 15 feet put the Newcastle man back in the lead going into the final two holes. With a onestroke win on the 17th, Church secured a well-grafted victory, a fitting reward for his self-imposed sleep deprivation. The 2nd pairing involved 1st year Finlay Hutchinson. In his first game for the 1sts, after a strong 4&3 victory for the 2nds a week previous, he got off to a horrendous start. Up against it from the outset, Hutchinson was down three holes after missing an easy putt on the 6th. At this point, it looked like it could
staged a truly remarkable victory, particularly taking into account his situation for that day. A diligent student, Ben had been awake throughout the night before the match completing an important assignment, meaning that he wasn’t in the best of conditions for tee-off. This alarmingly didn’t seem to phase him; quickly establishing a strong lead with a win on the 2nd hole and superb three-stroke birdie on the 3rd to give himself a two-hole lead. Unfortunately, fatigue began to kick in to his game, causing him to lose the 8th which therefore, despite a win at the 10th, the
be a long afternoon for him. The long walk to the 7th must have taken forever, in the time, it seemed, Hutchinson summoned the mental strength and resilience similar to Justin Rose in the 2014 Ryder Cup. He took the 7th with a solid par to set the comeback in motion; with two wins over the next three holes, followed by an excellent birdie on the 11th, Hutchinson gained a lead that he would go on to maintain and coast to a well played victory over his opponent 3&2. With Hutchison’s win, the momentum shifted Newcastle’s way but his partner in the pair could not maintain it. Archie
“The Knights turned up the gas and turned on the showboating with Cole and Baugh especially pleasing the crowd”
Warman had unfortunately fallen to a three hole deficit by the 13th, although he looked to be recovering, his opposite number Daniel Thompson managed to regain his superior form from earlier in the course to take the 16th hole and with it the game 3&2. The final day’s pairing came down to the wire with the whole match still in the balance. Both sides had two wins and two losses when Northumbria’s Jack Lewis teed off on the 18th hole. His Newcastle opponent Dom Lavery had resolutely fought back from three holes down to narrow the gap to just one, entering the final hole. Sadly, Dom’s persistence didn’t pay off and with the last hole halved Northumbria held the advantage going into the final match-ups. Jack Hugillo had undergone a tense encounter with his opponent Josh Stanser; since the beginning of play, the lead had gone back and forth between the two players and by the 18th there was only one point in it. But after Hugillo’s drive set him behind a large hazardous tree, with Stanser on the fairway, the momentum shifted resulting in a tense victory for Northumbria 2nds. Captain White said afterwards that the loss doesn’t damage Newcastle’s chances of promotion. The wins for Hutchinson and Church, coupled with a hearty performance from Lavery, are certainly promising signs for the future. Next up for the Newcastle 1sts are Sunderland 1sts, a perceivably weaker side. Having already lost to Newcastle 2nds, this should prove an easier fixture for this slowly improving squad.
P.37 HOME JOY FOR FOOTY
P.38