The Durango Telegraph, Feb. 8, 2024

Tortured Journalists Department

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inside

T H E

O R I G I N A L

I N D I E

W E E K L Y

L I N E

O N

D U R A N G O

&

B E Y O N D

Downhill dreams

Raising Kane

Dangerous liaisons

How a failed ski hill just may have saved Silverton p5

Grassroots group fights luxury housing project p9

Navigating the friends-withbenefits minefield p11

2 n Feb. 8, 2024

telegraph

lineup

A few ideas to put the “fun” back into crowdfunding

5 Land Desk

4 La Vida Local

Oh, the humanity

by Addyson Santese

6-7 Soapbox

5

8 Regional News

Close call

10 State News

How one failed ski area may have changed Silverton’s trajectory

by Jonathan Thompson / Land Desk

11 Adventures in Dating

8

12-13 Stuff to Do

Grassroots group mobilizes to fight ‘luxury’ housing development

14 Free Will Astrology

13 Ask Rachel

Raising Kane

by Jennaye Derge

15 Classifieds

11

15 Haiku Movie Review

It’s complicated Navigating the friends-with-benefits relationship minefield

On the cover The aptly named “Scuba Pie” by local artist extraordinaire Jon Bailey.

by Jenny Mason

boilerplate

Ear to the ground: “His social batteries are running low.”

– Gen tik tok on another way of saying, “he needs some alone time.”

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telegraph

Sun’s out, buns out

thepole

4

RegularOccurrences

For an upcoming girls ski weekend at Sunlight Mountain Resort, you can leave your boots on – but not much else.

On March 29-30, the small, privately owned resort near Glenwood Springs will host the all-female “Boot Tan Fest,” complete with an end-of-day naked ski lap.

The festival, entering its fourth year, is open to all women as well as female-identifying and nonbinary individuals for a weekend of skiing, special events, camaraderie and interesting tan lines.

According to The Denver Post, Jenny Verrochi started Boot Tan Fest in 2021 after organizing a casual, ladies-only naked lap at the now-defunct Bluebird Backcountry ski area near Kremmling. In 2022, it became an official, ticketed event drawing 200 people.

In 2023, the event more than doubled, bringing in 450 people.

Could it be the allure of the wind on your, uh, cheeks, is just too good to pass up?

“It is the best feeling,” Verrochi confessed.

After Bluebird announced it was closing last summer, Verrochi approached resorts across the country to host the event. Strangely enough, many were game – but ultimately, she decided to keep it in Colorado.

“We went with Sunlight because … it’s a super low-key, very chill vibe. This wouldn’t be possible at Aspen or Vail,” she told The Post.

Because Sunlight actually has chairlifts and is near hotels, restaurants and an interstate, Verrochi said she is expecting upwards of 1,500 attendees this year.

“It’s much more accessible for people,” she said. “There’s ski lifts, which makes it beginner-friendly and anyone can join.”

Boot Tan Fest will not be taking over the resort for the day; Sunlight will operate as normal day. However, once the resort closes at 3 p.m. on March 29, that’s when the skivvies will be shed for the real – and possibly quite nippy – fun. (Just don’t wipe out; no one needs slush rash on their lady parts.)

Boot Tan Fest, which is sponsored by Kari Traa, will also feature vendors from womenowned brands, a comedy show, après party, oh, and tattoos.

For Verrochi, watching Boot Tan Fest grow from “a scrappy backcountry festival to a major resort” has been gratifying, and she hopes any women interested in meeting other like-minded skiers will join the party.

“We want it to be welcoming,” she said.

“Come by yourself, and you’re sure to walk away with friends.” And maybe an interesting sunburn.

Find tickets and info. at boottanfest.com.

Feb. 8, 2024 n 3

opinion

LaVidaLocal For the love of God, GoFundMe Lately, I’ve been feeling like, we as a society have forgotten the collective value of shame. Nowhere is this more evident than on crowdfunding platforms.

Websites like GoFundMe seem to solely exist to provide a stopgap for the crushing inadequacies of the American healthcare system, or to help your unemployed acquaintance get a tattoo because it would like, really boost their self-esteem, ya know?

From fulfilling someone’s desperate desire to own a hedgehog, to funding the purchase of a brand new 2024 Ford Bronco (the Sasquatch edition, obviously), there’s seemingly no whim unworthy of your financial support these days. But where’s the cringiness? Where’s the icky internal guilt? Where’s the outright humiliation that’s supposed to be associated with an adult begging for other people’s hard-earned money like some kid sitting on the lap of a mall Santa?

Reasonable alternatives to drumming up some cash (like crafting a careful savings plan or opening up a credit card or – gag – getting a real job!) have become obsolete in an age where you can simply create a GoFundMe page, sit back and watch the donations come flooding in.

Forget using philanthropy to patch the gaping holes in the fabric of our social safety net. If that one chick from your high school can ask for $9,000 to pay for her trip to India (to get a yoga instructor certification that she assures you will help her bring love and light into the world), then I feel entitled to ask strangers to foot the bill for my nonsensical hankerings too!

Here’s a list of my upcoming (shamelessly self-serving) GoFundMe campaigns. Requested dollar amounts are TBD: • Get someone to fix the gearbox on the Hesperus chairlift because I want to be able to cry on my snowboard at night.

• Teach Boomers how to stop using commas as periods in Facebook posts.

• Build me a functional DeLorean time machine so I can go back to 1985 and watch Mötley Crüe perform at the height of their sexual prowess (I promise not to accidentally make out with my mom while I’m there).

• Make cinnamon roll canisters less scary to open.

• Design an internet software that filters out any content related to the.

intimate details of Taylor Swift’s private dating life so I can stop feeling like I’m the third wheel to all of her relationships.

• Help me figure out the name of that one song that goes “bum BA DUN ba daaaa” that Shazam strangely couldn’t identify when I tried to sing it into the app.

• Advance animal science to a point where the smell of my dogs’ food doesn’t make me want to vomit or give me nightmarish flashbacks to living downwind of the Purina factory in Flagstaff.

• As an addendum to the cinnamon roll thing: I also need someone to invent a whole new way of opening champagne bottles that doesn’t involve any popping or projectiles or other things that make me feel like I’m under siege when I’m simply trying to make a relaxing mimosa.

• Make dairy stop hurting my tummy. :( • Convince music industry executives that we don’t need them to keep taking songs that are already good and mutate them into much, much worse remixes or cover songs (leave Tracy Chapman alone).

• Buy me a king-size bed because sometimes my husband knees me in the back in the middle of the night like we’re in a WWE SmackDown steel cage match, and I have to jostle his shoulder and say, “hey, you’re kneeing me in the back.”

• Fund my cat’s lifesaving emergency medical treatment. PSYCH! You thought that one was going to be for real, didn’t you? LOL. No, but seriously, I do need help to quit biting my nails.

• You know what? Go ahead and make it so that no foods are scary. Period. I’m already a very easily startled person, and it’s a hard condition to live with.

• Just flat-out pay off my mortgage. Not having to worry about such mundane, earthly burdens will free up the mental and emotional space for me to explore the passions that set my soul alight, such as generally not having to work or be employed in any way.

• Make truck nutz illegal.

Thanks, everyone! Your donations mean the world to me! And don’t worry, I absolutely will not reach out to you individually to thank you for your generous contribution. I think a generic, one-off Instagram story will suffice.

With love and gratitude, Addyson.

– Addyson Santese

SignoftheDownfall:

Thumbin’It HBD LPC! La Plata County is 150 years old this week. Stop by the Animas Museum on Saturday and have some cake and maybe learn a thing or two about local history.

We know, we know – precipitation is good – but we can’t leave this one alone.

Torrential rain in Colorado in February.

Devastating floods in California. Really, El Niño? We thought you were our friend.

Highway 160 east of Elmore’s is slated for a $59 million safety makeover, with new turn lanes, highway widening, a roundabout, wildlife fencing and a wildlife underpass.

Wanna see the Super Bowl in person?

It’ll cost you upwards of $10,000 – but hey, you might have a Taylor Swift sighting on the Jumbotron. Which you can also do at home for free.

Well, it looks like we survived another Snowdown relatively unscathed – some of us more than others. And a good time seemed to be had by all. Way to go, team.

4 n Feb. 8, 2024

King Charles, 75, who took the throne just 18 months ago, has cancer. Say what you want about the monarchy, colonialism and Diana, but can’t a guy catch a break?

telegraph

Chicken Sicks An influencer going by “John” has eaten raw chicken online every day since Jan. 19.

In his videos, John eats uncooked chicken paired with different seasonings and dipping sauces, and he washes it down with raw eggs to speed up his public suicide. Thousands of people have commented on John’s posts with salmonella warnings, but he also has a fanbase that eggs him on. John says he’ll continue until he gets a “tummy ache.” But really, since John is a grown man who uses the word “tummy,” most people hope he’ll keep going until he’s out of the gene pool.

LandDesk

Downhill dreams

How a 1962 effort to ‘Aspenize’ Silverton never came to be (thankfully)

by Jonathan Thompson The likely envisioned location for the Sultan Ski Area, just north of Silverton off Highway 550.

Conceived in 1962, the plans were abandoned a few years later./ Photo illustration by Jonathan Thompson

O

n Jan. 11, the Kendall Mountain Ski Area in Silverton celebrated its 60th birthday. On that day in 1964, 125 skiers tried out the new rope tow, installed by local miners on the lower slopes of Kendall.

Locals had big hopes for expanding the ski hill and making it a destination resort.

Kendall could be called Silverton’s Skiing Plan B. Before that, there was the Sultan Mountain Ski Area – or at least the dream of such a thing. It would never come to be, obviously, but it’s fun to contemplate the what ifs of this now mostly forgotten proposal.

I got to thinking about this would-be development last week, when the San Juan County Historical Society posted a conceptual sketch of the ski area’s proposed second phase on its Facebook page. And when I started looking into the history (again), I was reminded of how different developing a ski area was 60 years ago, and also of how many little ski hills existed prior to this but have been lost to history.

In the late 1950s, the U.S. Forest Service actually went looking for proposals to develop ski areas on public lands in Colorado. Logging had subsided considerably, skiing was the up-and-coming thing, and the land agency apparently wanted to keep up with the times. One of the sites it presented was outside of Silverton, but initially there were no takers.

But then, in late1960 or early 1961, the DenverGolden Corp. stepped up. The mining firm was looking to branch out, and a ski area in a mining town that was eager to diversify its economy seemed to fit the bill.

Permitting a ski area on public land was a hell of a lot easier back then. Within months, Denver-Golden had received the Forest Service’s go-ahead and had posted the required bonds for what it initially envisioned as an 800-acre ski area with more than 15,000 feet of expert and advanced trails and 10,000 feet of intermediate and beginner slopes.

The company bought Red Mountain Lodges and had options to buy a number of other Silverton properties. It hired Dick Durrance, a renowned ski racer who had made Aspen a going concern, to help with planning.

And it expected to begin construction in 1962.

Silverton’s denizens generally welcomed the development. The mining industry was on its way back after a decade-long hiatus, led by Standard Metals’ reopening of the fabled Sunnyside Mine. But

most locals recognized the town needed something more than just mining and summer tourism.

Silverton certainly had the terrain, the snow and the skiing history – mail-carriers of old traveled by long, wooden skis – to follow in the footprints of Aspen, also a former mining town. The publishers and editors of the Silverton Standard & the Miner, first Ross Beaber and then Allen Nossaman, liked the idea. And when Ian Thompson (my father) came in to cover for Nossaman (while Allen went off to the National Guard), he, too, advocated for winter recreation and for establishing Silverton as a high-altitude Olympic cross-country ski team training ground.

But 1962 came and went, and Denver-Golden had done little more than build a road on its proposed slopes. Ditto in 1963, when it became clear that the Sultan Mountain Ski Area was probably dead, spurring locals to take matters into their own hands and cut runs and build a tow on Kendall. And finally, in June of 1964, Denver-Golden announced it was dropping the proposal after failing to scrape up enough cash.

For a year or so, it looked like Kendall Mountain could become the region’s premiere ski resort. It had plenty of room to expand, the base area was in town with all of the infrastructure, and the snow was far better

than at the handful of makeshift ski hills nearby.

Silverton’s dreams of being Aspenized were dashed in 1965, however, when Durango-Denver oilman Ray Duncan established Purgatory Ski Area on Forest Service land 23 miles south of Silverton. The new resort was bigger, steeper and easier to access than Kendall Mountain, and even though it was closer to Silverton than to Durango, the larger, lowland community reaped most of the benefits.

Kendall kept operating until 1983, when it seemingly shut down for good. Then, in the 1990s, a determined group of locals started working to reopen it. A chairlift was installed, and eventually, a new lodge was built (after the rickety old one burnt down). Now, Kendall draws folks from all over looking for a more down-home and affordable skiing experience. It’s not quite what Silverton craved in the 1960s, but looking back, I’m sure many are thanking their lucky stars that Denver-Golden couldn’t scrape up the funds to build its resort and, surely, radically alter the trajectory of little Silverton. ■ The Land Desk is a newsletter from Jonathan P. Thompson, author of “River of Lost Souls,” “Behind the Slickrock Curtain” and “Sagebrush Empire.” To subscribe, go to: www.landdesk.org

THANK YOU 1135 Main Ave. • DGO, CO

Snowdown organizers & participants for an amazing Snowdown 2024! telegraph

Feb. 8, 2024 n 5

SoapBox Safety not art on ART Durango is fortunate to have so many talented artists. We see their artwork in so many places throughout town. But do we really need to spend $80,000 to showcase this talent along the River Trail?

The River Trail has a beauty all its own. I’ve walked the length of it hundreds of times over the last 36 years, and never once have I thought, “I’d like to see more man-made art here.” What I have thought is, “What a beautiful landscape! Look at that eagle flying up the river! How lucky are we to live on a postcard!” I’ve also thought, “I hate rude bikers! Slow down! Put your damn dog on a leash! Where is a bathroom when we need one?”

That money could be used in so many more ways to improve the trail.

Buy some paint, and put yellow lines down the middle to give a visual guide to bikers and pedestrians. Put up signs reminding people to leash their dogs, keep right, yield to pedestrians, be kind.

Build year-round bathrooms.

The River Trail is a true asset to Durango. But it’s a busy, dangerous

D-Tooned/by Rob Pudim place to be at times. Improvements should double as safety upgrades, and make it an even better place to recreate.

Please reconsider spending that money wisely.

–Jane Dunn, Durango

Rebuild Palestine The exorbitant cost to rebuild 90% of Gaza for Palestinians is not going to come from their neighbor, Israel. Egypt, Jordan and other Arabic countries will expect Israel to pick up the tab. Our members in Congress, no matter what political party, would no doubt gag and bag the idea of opening an overly stretched purse for Palestine. This toxic brew has been an issue ever since the Jews settled in Israel on Palestinian land in 1948.

Real estate, similar in the size/geography of Gaza and the West Bank, could be purchased next door in Egypt for the Palestinians. Nations, hopefully, would have the good sense to pitch in and cover the cost of building homes, schools and hospitals.

This idea of many nations helping out 2 million homeless Palestinians pays years

of dividends to keep the peace in a volatile Middle East. Maybe the insanely wealthy makers of mass destruction could be encouraged to participate in helping, not destroying, 2 million Palestinians.

Better to give aid toward 2 million

Palestinians (minus the thousands of children/ innocents killed or permanently maimed since Oct. 7) immediately than have 8 billion on Earth blown to kingdom come sooner than later over ignorance.

–Sally Florence, Durango

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6 n Feb. 8, 2024

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telegraph

No reason to import Boebert Colorado’s Fourth Congressional District has produced some of the finest Republican leaders in our state.

• Decorated for Navy combat duty in Vietnam, Greeley’s Hank Brown represented CD4 for 10 years before his election to the U.S. Senate. He later served as president of University of CO and the Daniels Fund.

• Wayne Allard won two terms in the U.S. Senate after representing CD4 for six years. The Fort Collins veterinarian defined the role of a low-key politician, often described as “a workhorse, not a show horse.”

• Yuma native Cory Gardner ousted Democrat Betsy Markey to win his first of three terms in Congress. The most recent Republican to win a significant statewide office, he toppled incumbent Mark Udall for U.S. Senate in 2014.

• Bob Schaffer (Fort Collins), Marilyn Musgrave (Fort Morgan) and Ken Buck (Greeley) also did the essential, often-unglamorous work of serving their constituents. Each had a demonstrable record of service to the district.

Now consider Rep. Lauren Boebert, who currently represents the Western Slope, San Luis Valley and Pueblo in the Third Congressional District but plans to seek election this fall in CD4.

I’m not a frequent Boebert critic, but this decision reveals an irresponsibly self-centered approach to a serious job. Too many politicians confuse serving in Congress with starring in a reality TV show.

Boebert’s transition to celebrity-politician was manifest by her disgraceful behavior at a Denver theater where she engaged in an extended groping

session with her date, quarreled with others in the audience when asked to sit down and stop vaping, and displayed the trademark slogan of self-importance (“Do you know who I am?”) upon being escorted from the theater.

Like many Coloradans, I knew little about Boebert when she upset the incumbent in the 2020 Republican primary. Charismatic and vivacious, she had an inspiring story – a high school dropout who supported herself by working unglamorous jobs and ultimately found success and notoriety at the restaurant that she and her husband opened. Wanting Republicans to keep that seat, I donated to her campaign.

After the election, her early association with Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene was troubling, so it was encouraging that she later parted ways with the Georgia conspiracy peddler.

The 2022 election brought more surprises. Onethird of Republican primary voters favored her opponent. She won reelection by just 536 votes (compared to 26,000 two years earlier) – even after CD3 was reconfigured to be more favorable to Republicans. Had she focused more on constituent services and less on media opportunities, voters surely would have rewarded her.

She justified her plans to jump districts by claiming that she doesn’t want to risk Republicans losing CD3. But that horse has already left the barn, thanks entirely to Boebert. Her leading Democrat opponent has more than $5 million in the bank – a massive head start against any Republican.

If she has squandered the GOP advantage in CD3, why would CD4 Republicans want to import her baggage – and the Democrat money it attracts?

Stay classy, Durango

Obviously, Boebert is making this switch, because being in Congress is the best job she’s ever had.

CD4 voters have been through this before. Marilyn Musgrave riled Democrats with her advocacy for defining marriage as solely between one man and one woman. Billionaires Tim Gill and Pat Stryker funded relentless attacks on Musgrave, creating parody commercials with an actress dressed to resemble her. Her margin of victory dwindled (13%, 6.3%, 2.5%) until she was defeated in the Obama wave of 2008.

But there’s a big difference between Musgrave and Boebert. Musgrave is a fundamentally decent person who never sought the spotlight but didn’t duck her principles. She always conducted herself with dignity. That’s why her opponents had to create commercials to mock her. By contrast, Boebert’s own behavior mocks what she claims to stand for. I believe in grace and do not wish Boebert ill, but Congress has not brought out the best in her.

Republicans from Weld to Douglas counties and across the Eastern Plains have plenty of well-qualified candidates to choose from. Let’s make our choice from those who have lived here and served us for decades.

–Mark Hillman, former Senate Majority Leader and State Treasurer, Burlington, Colo.

“We’ll print almost anything” The Telegraph prides itself on a liberal letters policy. We have only three requests: limit letters to 500 words; letters must be signed by the writer; and thank-you lists and libelous, personal attacks are unwelcome. Send your profundities by Monday at noon to telegraph@durangotelegraph.com

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telegraph

Feb. 8, 2024 n 7

RegionalGoingsOn

Keeping watch on Kane Creek Beloved Moab area slated for luxury resort and condos

by Jennaye Derge

M

any years ago, while I was still in college, my friends and I drove up a long, desolate road through Kane Creek Canyon in Moab, Utah.

We were camping within the quiet wilderness of red cliffs and the Colorado River. I had never, nor have, ever, seen a veil of stars as dense as the one I saw that night.

That wasn’t the first time I made my way up the canyon, nor do I hope it is my last – or anyone’s last chance to encounter a mostly empty, quiet Kane Creek.

The canyon is about 2 miles southwest of Moab and has been a recreational artery for ages; taking campers, climbers, mountain bikers, hikers, base jumpers and other outdoor enthusiasts to the places they love.

Now, heavy machinery is rumbling around an area inside the canyon called King’s Bottom, leveling and back filling 180 acres of private land to make room for 586 residential and short-term units, and 72,000 square feet of commercial space. The entity behind the development is Kane Creek Preservation and Development, LLC (KCPD), a private investment group based in San Francisco.

The group, contrary to the “Preservation” name, is “historically focused on the hospitality and consumer sectors … a vertically integrated developer, investor and lender for hospitality and multifamily real estate.”

It has a portfolio of luxury investments all over the country, including upscale hotels in Manhattan and Chicago, and a golf and spa retreat in Carmel Valley, Calif.

Kane Creek is probably one of the last places in Moab someone might imagine a golf course, spa or high-rise hotel. Slapping a real estate sticker on the land directly in contact with the Colorado River seems absurd. However, the development group found the chance to do so through a loophole from a land-use agreement made with Grand County a few decades ago.

Back in the ’80s and ’90s, Moab was seeing an influx of visitors and tourists who would wander up Kane Creek to camp, inevitably making marks by leaving human waste and garbage behind. In response, the county and BLM sought out areas to develop into campgrounds in order to build facilities such as bathrooms and trash receptacles. At the time, the landowner of the 10-acre King’s Bottom – where the King’s Bottom Campground is now – supported the zoning for the simple reason of continuing to keep Kane Creek and its adjacent water safe and clean.

Thirty or so years later, KCPD bought the land, home to a chicken farm and smattering of alternative dwellings, from a local family. However, possibly due to a clerical error made years ago, the area had been rezoned from the original 18 units for up to 2,400 units, paving the way for a metropolis of condos.

8 n Feb. 8, 2024

An eagle’s eye view of King’s Bottom, the proposed development area in Kane Creek Canyon in Moab./ Courtesy photo Calling the project “thoughtful and respectful,” the San Francisco-based development group has planned for a resort and “luxury living” for about two years.

But it wasn’t until a few months ago that locals started to get a whiff of what was truly happening and how big the project and impact would be.

Enter, Kane Creek Development Watch, a grassroots advocacy group started by a couple of concerned locals that has since garnered support of over 13,000 (and growing) petitioners to stop the development. The group has put out an unrelenting rallying call to whoever loves Moab or just wild places in general and is pressuring on county officials and the developers to ask the questions of “why” and “how.”

Kane Creek Development Watch has noted of the environmental destruction the luxury units would cause, including pollution and disruption to the Colorado River – a critical water source for Utah’s neighboring southern states – as well as noise and light pollution.

Not only that, but the development sits on a wellknown floodplain. And while KCPD has tried to reason that it will backfill and raise the land by 2-10 feet to solve that problem, many locals only laugh at the naivety.

In a letter written about the development to the Utah Division of Water Quality on behalf of citizens of Grand and San Juan counties, Conservation Director

telegraph

of Living Rivers & Colorado Riverkeeper John Weisheit wrote: “The extreme behaviors of nature cannot be predicted – they occur randomly. If they have happened in the past, they will happen in the future.”

The letter continues to speak of the effects of the proposed development and the estimated added pressure of 1,650 extra people on Kane Creek and surrounding areas.

Despite the letter, the development appears to be moving forward, including building its own wastewater treatment plant. According to Kane Creek Development Watch organizer Dailey Haren, the Grand County Commission will be voting on the conditional use permit for the sewage plant in the next month or two. Needless to say, if building on floodplains isn’t halted and sewage plants are installed, we’d have to hold our breath for the day the flooding comes and it all goes to literal and figurative shit.

The environmental concerns don’t end with flooding. Kane Creek Development Watch has had an eagle eye on every aspect of the development, including social and economic impacts. The group, along with other opponents of the project, have called out KCPD for falsely claiming that these luxury units will ease the local housing crisis, noting that the units are specifically marketed to second homeowners and part-time residents. In fact, a 2022 Sotheby’s Realty brochure provided by a Kane Creek resident depicts >

the area filled with swimming pools, spas, water features, fitness centers, restaurants and more. According to the brochure, 2-bedroom, 2.5 bathroom duplexes will be sold for $1.5 million.

Moab is a town notoriously run by gritty outdoors people – river rats, climbers and mountain bikers – who survive off the service industry. There is absolutely no way these locals could afford such “luxury.”

As for the ongoing work of Kane Creek Development Watch, the group has grown exponentially, referring to the support it has received as a “swell.”

Volunteers have raised their hands to be movers and shakers, helping to spread the word, keep everyone informed and stop the development before permanent damage is too great to bear.

However, the situation is constantly evolving. Just this week, Kane Creek Development Watch submitted evidence to Grand County that the gravel mining above the Kane Creek Road, where developers are extracting material to build up the floodplain, is a violation of the County Land Use Code. The group is demanding an immediate cease and desist to work at the site.

While time is of the essence, hope is high in the eyes of the watchdog group

and its 13,000-plus supporters. A recent public meeting on the development was standing-room only with an estimated 100 attending in person and more on Zoom.

“When diverse individuals set aside differences to unite for a common cause, it amplifies the strength and legitimacy of the movement,” Laura Long, a main organizer of Kane Creek Development Watch, said. “We are a powerful force that is hard for developers or decision-makers to disregard. This movement is passionate with expert environmentalists, lawyers and grassroots activists within the Moab community and beyond.”

The group continues to work hard to navigate the complexities it will face when going up against the luxury development Goliath, and a crowdsourcing fund has been set up to offset operating and legal costs (You can find the donation page on their website.).

“We believe the best outcome would be to see the developers recognize our unified voice and choose to stand on the right side of history – selling the land for true preservation,” Long said.

“In the more likely case that they disregard the community’s collective will, general welfare and the

The proposed site for nearly 600 residential units and 72,000 square feet of commercial space sits on a floodplain, which was inundated by the Colorado River in 2012 as seen here./Courtesy photo environmental imperatives at stake, we will be prepared to take action, leveraging every legal and community resource at our disposal.”

The fight is imperative, not just for Kane Creek and Moab, but for any open space that we can still go to that is

telegraph

quiet, peaceful and you can see a veil of stars like you’ve never seen before.

To learn more, donate or help, visit www.savemoab.org or www.kanecreekwatch.org. You can also follow Kane Creek Watch on Instagram @kanecreek_develop ment_watch. ■

Feb. 8, 2024 n 9

BigPivots

Turf wars Bill limiting nonfunctional, non-native turf clears Colorado Senate

by Allen Best

C

olorado legislators passed a bill in 2022 that delivered $2 million to programs across the state for removal of turf in urban areas that are classified as nonfunctional. By that, legislators mean Kentucky bluegrass and other thirsty-grass species that were meant to be seen, but rarely, if ever, used.

Now, they are taking the next step. On Jan. 30, the Colorado Senate voted in favor of Senate Bill 24-005, which would prevent thirsty turf from being planted in certain places. Those places include alongside roads and streets or in medians, as well as in the expansive areas surrounding offices or commercial buildings, in front of government buildings and in entryways and common areas managed by homeowners associations. The bill also bars use of plastic turf in lieu of organic vegetation.

“If we don’t have to start watering that turf in the first place, we never have to replace it in the future,” Sen.

Dylan Roberts, D-Frisco, a co-sponsor, said.

Roberts stressed that the ban would not apply to individual homes or retroactively to established turf. “It applies to new development or redevelopment. It does not apply to residential homes,” he said. “This is about industrial, commercial and government property.”

Kentucky bluegrass and other imported grass species imported typically use far more water than buffalo grass and other species indigenous to Colorado. The bill does allow hybrids that use less water as well as indigenous grass species.

Originally reviewed by committee in October, the bill was subsequently modified to provide greater clarity about what constitutes functional vs. nonfunctional turf, while giving municipalities greater flexibility. If the bill becomes law, local jurisdictions will have until Jan. 1, 2026, to adopt the new standards.

After being approved on by the Senate on Jan. 31, the measure now moves to the House.

Advocates do not argue that limits on expansion of “nonfunctional turf” will be just a small drop in helping to solve Colorado’s water problems. Municipalities use only 7% of the state’s water, and outdoor use constitutes roughly half of that. “One more tool in the toolbox,” Roberts said.

However, Sen. Cleave Simpson, R-Alamosa, said if the standard had been adopted 20 to 30 years ago, perhaps 10,000 acre-feet of water could have been saved annually.

“As a percentage, it is minimal,” he conceded. “It’s

A bill moving through the Colorado General Assembly would require local jurisdictions to amend their landscaping codes to eliminate use of thirsty species of grasses from alongside roads such as this streetscape in Arvada. / Photo by Allen Best closing the gaps in small increments as best you can as opposed to large sweeping change.”

The backdrop for this is more frequent drought and rising temperatures, what Simpson called the aridification of the West. The climatic shift is forcing harder choices.

“We are all trying to figure out how to live and work in this space,” Simpson said. ■

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10 n Feb. 8, 2024

telegraph

1000mg MAMMOTH Carts: $11 Sale runs through Feb. 29 *OTD pricing, while supplies last, 21+

AdventuresinDating

Dangerous liaisons Navigating the friends-with-benefits minefield

by Jenny Mason

I

nside the pop-tent, Mr. Machu Picchu and I formed a coil of skin and sweat. Our bathing suits shed.

Our minds lost. We moved as silent and serious as snakes.

Outside the tent, waves massaged the bare shoulders of the beach. It was the hottest day of summer so far. The sun’s scorch was practically audible. Throngs crowded the beach seeking refuge in or near the water. Shash-shash-shash. People’s feet punctuated the sand as they trekked to or from the water.

Chatter and laughter mingled.

Meanwhile, the “just friends” status between me and Mr. MP had completely collapsed. I blame the record-breaking heat. It had to be that, because we’d successfully managed being just friends for the last several months. We went backpacking, camping, cooked dinners and enjoyed a tipsy night out dancing – all without incident.

So what if temptation weighted every encounter, relentless as gravity? We’d withstood that pull with the enduring discipline of Entrada sandstone. At the beach, sealed off from view in the tent, intermittently chatting and napping, a few flirtatious caresses exposed us as frauds. Our platonic agreement crumbled faster than Mancos shale.

Some time ago, Mr. MP and I met through a dating app. Our fiery attraction was instant and mutual. We proved capable of cultivating more than just carnal delights. Intellectual exchanges. Intimate conversations.

Mutual support. By golly, we harvested an orchard of good outcomes. I was so satisfied with all the fruits of our interactions that I was actually contemplating being a stepmom for the second time in my life. A divorcee, Mr. MP was raising a young child.

“I want to have more children,” he confessed one day.

I gulped back my devastation and mustered nonchalance, “Oh. OK. Yes, of course. That makes sense.”

By which, I meant: That’s ridiculous! You’re in your forties! What are you planning to do, draft a fecund 25-year-old into baby-making service??

He certainly had the wherewithal to do so with his South American flair, silky Spanish accent, thick hair blacker than coffee grounds, chiseled cheeks and eyes so dark you could dive in with a floodlight and never find the bottom.

I had no choice but to bow out. My tubes had been firmly tied two decades ago. I could never aspire to be Mama Machu Picchu.

“Could we be friends with benefits?” he asked.

I balked. Back in my day, the cultural messaging from movies or magazines deemed the friends-withbenefits relationship (FWBR) as a sham. It was a farce that opportunistic people used to get lucky with naive, goodhearted humans. I could not expect anything but disappointment. In a 2020 study, social scientists

found that the outcome of the FWBR clashed with people’s initial expectations 83% of the time.

In other words, if you wanted the FWBR to retain an established friendship while enjoying some casual sex on the side, you were strolling Disappointment Lane. If you wanted the FWBR to ultimately result in a committed, romantic, long-term relationship, you were doomed. FWBRs resulted in a conventional relationship less than 15% of the time.

Facing such odds, I insisted we enter a strictly friends-only treaty. No more sharing the nuclear codes.

Besides, what good were “benefits” if I was destined to be shunted aside the minute Lil Miss Babymaker turned up? But then, the plate tectonics in the poptent shifted our platonic foundation. We needed to renegotiate the terms of our treaty. If, perhaps, we were forthright in our communication, we could successfully manage an FWBR. The study from 2020, plus others in 2014 and 2023, found that the most rewarding and enjoyable FWBRs grew out of excellent communication. Partners who established ground rules and checked in regularly seemed most able to establish long-term arrangements and/or maintain solid friendships once benefits ran out. People in a high-functioning FWBR also reported feeling more adventurous and more desired than they’d felt in prior conventional relationships. Their sex lives were spicier because they felt safe exploring and experimenting with their B Double F Triple X. Perhaps my biases concerning FWBRs were unfounded. Maybe it wasn’t the forbidden fruit of the relationship world. Maybe it got a bad rap only because its red, juicy deliciousness exposed the bland flavors and flat textures of all conventional relationships. One bite wouldn’t hurt, would it?

telegraph

For several months, my FWBR with Mr. MP has correlated with the positive study data. On a scientist’s Likert Scale, my overall satisfaction levels are: Likert.

Lovert. Want some more of ert!

The scores, however, are not watertight. Whenever MP travels for work, I wonder if he goes out hunting for Lil Miss Babymaker. Or, when he doesn’t message for many days, I worry that his ideal Womber Woman has usurped me.

“It bums me out,” I said to MP one night while wrapped in his arms, my cheek on his bare chest. “We are so compatible, so intimate and so supportive of each other and yet…you still want to find someone else. The only thing I don’t give you is the one thing I can’t give you – a child. Everything else I do give you just isn’t enough.”

Sadness sagged his features as he listened. He held me tighter. “I have real feelings for you,” he whispered between kisses to my forehead. “Maybe they aren’t totally what you want them to be, but they are real. I am here giving you everything.”

And there it was: the bald truth. We were both giving each other everything we could. In a bid to beat bad odds, Mr. Machu Picchu and I have targeted our arrows at honesty, kindness and respect. We both care deeply for each other and our bond as friends, even though we fundamentally disagree about apples. He believes the fruits of our partnership are best employed serving the FWBR, whereas I think they make for a solid, committed relationship. To my thinking, it is the difference between using apples as paperweights versus ingredients in pie. Apples can do both jobs; they do one of them much better. Only time will tell if indulging in forbidden fruits or forbidding a fruit from exuding its quintessence is the greater sin. ■ Feb. 8, 2024 n 11

StufftoDo

Deadline for “Stuff to Do” submissions is Monday at noon. To submit an item, email: calendar@durangotelegraph.com

Thursday08

Free Friday Yoga, 8:30 a.m., Lively (a boutique), 809 Main Ave.

Uncle Clyde’s Run and Slide, 10 a.m.-5 p.m., Purgatory Resort

Durango Food Not Bombs mutual aid and potluck, 2-4 p.m., Buckley Park

Leah Orlikowski plays, 5-8 p.m., El Rancho Tavern, 975 Main Ave.

“Vibrant Cows,” solo art show

by Joseph Magnano, opening, 11 a.m. - 6 p.m., Gallery 1135 Main Ave. Show runs thru Feb. 29

Snow Science & Social, 1-3 p.m., Andrews Lake Winter Parking Area, Hwy 550. Hosted by SJMA and MSI.

Board Game Sundays, 2 p.m., Lola’s Place, 725 E. 2nd Ave.

Mardi Gras Masquerade Ball and Silent Auction, 5-8 p.m., Elks Lodge, 901 E 2nd Ave

Purgys, Purgatory Resort.

Randy Crumbaugh plays, 5 p.m., Ska, 225 Girard St.

Durango Galentine’s Speed Networking, 5:30 p.m.-7:30 p.m., Four Leaves Winery, 528 Main Ave.

Fanny Pack Friday, 3 p.m., The Nugget Mountain Bar, 48721 North Hwy 550

“Wildflowers of Durango Trails,” presented by Colorado Native Plant Society, 6-7:30 p.m., FLC Center for Southwest Studies Lyceum Room and via Zoom

Leah Orlikowski plays, 5-8 p.m., El Rancho Tavern, 975 Main Ave.

“Common Ground,” screening and Q&A, 6-8 p.m., Vallecito Room, Fort Lewis College. Presented by the Citizens’ Climate Lobby Live music by Tim Sullivan, 6-9 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Trivia Night, 6:30 p.m., Powerhouse Science Center, 1330 Camino del Rio Leftover Salmon, 7:30 p.m., Community Concert Hall at Fort Lewis College Drag Trivia Night, 7:30 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave. Eli Emmitt w/ Dana Ariel perform, 8-10 p.m., The Indigo Room, 1315 Main Ave.

Friday09

Live music by Jack Ellis & Larry Carver, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave. Live music by Joel Racheff, 6-9 p.m., The Office Spiritorium, 699 Main ave “Small Mouth Sounds,” presented

by Merely players, 7 p.m., Merely Underground, 789 Tech Center Dr. Josh Teed with Starfox & Teknique, 7 p.m., Animas City Theatre, 128 E College Dr. Friday Dance! 6 p.m. West Coast swing lesson; 7 p.m. dance-of-themonth lesson; 8-10 p.m. open dancing, VFW, durangodancing.com Aria PettyOne presents Aria’s Pizza Party, 8:30-9:30 p.m., Father’s Daughters Pizza, 640 Main Ave.

Euchre Tournament, 5:30- 8:30 p.m., Union Social House, 3062 Main Community Yoga, 6-7 p.m., Yoga Durango, 1485 Florida Rd. Donations accepted “Galentines” ladies only night, 6-9 p.m., The Subterrain, 900 main Ave., Ste. F Live music by Matt Rupnow, 6-9 p.m., The Office Spiritorium, 699 Main Ave. High Altitude Blues, 6 p.m., Weminuche Woodfire Grill, 18044 Co Rd 501, Bayfield Latin Dance Night with live music, 6:30 p.m., The Light Box at Stillwater Music, 1316 Main Ave., Ste. C, stillwatermusic.org “Small Mouth Sounds,” presented

by Merely players, 7 p.m., Merely Underground, 789 Tech Center Dr. KDUR Cover Night: Neil Young, 7 p.m., Animas City Theatre, 128 E College Dr.

Saturday10

Winter Bike to Work Day, 7-9 a.m., Studio &, 1027 Main Ave.

La Plata County’s 150th birthday, all day, Animas Museum, 3065 W 2nd Ave.

BID Coffee and Conversation, 8:30-9:30 a.m., TBK Bank Community Room, 259 W 9th St.

Vallecito Ice Fishing Tournament, 7:30 a.m., Vallecito Marina, www.vcsa-co.org/forms-1

12 n Feb. 8, 2024

Superbowl Party, 3-10 p.m.,

telegraph

Silent Disco, 10 p.m.-12:30 a.m., 11th St. Station

Sunday11

Wee One High Tea, 1-3 p.m., EsoTerra Ciderworks, 558 Main Ave.

Durango Palestine Solidarity Coalition rally, 4 p.m., Buckley Park, 12th St. and Main Ave. Sunday Funday, 6 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave. Blue Moon Ramblers, 6-9 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave.

Monday12

Ukulele Jam, 5 p.m., Durango Coffee Co., 730 Main Ave. Happy Hour Yoga, 5:30 p.m., Ska Brewing, 225 Girard St.

Adam Swanson Ragtime, 5:30-10 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave. Songwriter Workshop with Anthony D’Amato and Thom Chacon, 6 p.m., Hideaway Arts Studio, Smiley Building, Studio #114 Comedy Showcase, 7:30 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Tuesday13

“Pandemic Preparedness,” part of the Great Decisions International Affairs Discussion series, 11:45 a.m. 1:45 p.m., Durango Public Library Cowboy Tuesdays, 12 noon, Strater Hotel/Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave.

AskRachel

V-Day, laundry lists and fire cocks Interesting fact: Fire hydrants, apparently still called “fire plugs” by some people, are also called “fire cocks.” There’s your Valentine’s Day conversation starter.

Dear Rachel, I need some serious V-Day help, because I’m a dumb-dumb who started a relationship like a month ago. It’s not even officially tell-yourfriends serious yet, but definitely trending that way. So what do you get a lady partner with that vague-but-promising relationship status? Roses feel cliché but mandatory.

Lingerie is out. Chocolate is always dicey.

Help!

– Clueless in Love Dear Hapless Gumshoe, Dude. It’s, like, nine months until Veterans Day. You have SO MUCH TIME. Take those months to get to know your lady partner and see what develops.

You’re bound to have some inside jokes and meaningful insights by November. I mean, you could even have a baby by then, if you play your Valentine’s Day cards really, really poorly. But whatever develops, chocolate is never dicey. Not if you get the good stuff.

– Don’t skimp, Rachel Dear Rachel, It seemed like I was the only person on the planet not working from home during the

pandemic. But now, I have a whole new respect for anyone getting anything done ever the last four years working form home. There is always laundry! And dogs demanding attention! And your bed just 20 steps away! And a fridge! Are we nuts to try working from home? Or nuts thinking we should work so much when we’re not at home?

– House Arrest Dear Part Timer, I recently saw some expert on TikTok, so you know she’s got it together, share how worker productivity has gone up something like 60% in the last 50 years but salaries have only gone up 17%. We’re due for a course correction. Like, we still say 9-5, but anyone knows it’s 8-5 because of lunch breaks, and 7-6 because of commuting, and 6:45-6 because we wake up in a panic right before we have to leave the house. I say enough.

I’m on strike! As soon as I finish this installment.

–Proudly in PJs, Rachel Dear Rachel, I need your help and thoughts on this. The fire plugs on our street are covered with snow. I am old and can’t shovel like I did when young. Should I ask the kids in the neighborhood to shovel for free? Don’t want to be a grump. I know the city folk are busy with snow on the streets. Kids in high school are on TIC TOC and busy. Should I call the

Community Yoga, 4:30-5:30 p.m., Yoga Durango, 1485 Florida Rd. Donations accepted

Hideaway Ukulele jam, 6-7:30 p.m., Smiley Building, Studio #114 and online via Zoom

Slow Bluegrass Jam, 5:30-7:30 p.m., General Palmer Hotel, 567 Main Ave.

Live music by Donny Johnson, 6-9 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave.

Live music by Terry Rickard, 6-9 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave. Live music by Sean O’Brien, 6-9 p.m., The Office Spiritorium, 699 Main Ave. Open Mic Night, 7 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Songwriters Showcase featuring Anthony D’Amato and Thom Chacon, 7:30 p.m., Community Concert Hall, Fort Lewis College.

Wednesday14 Restorative Yoga for Cancer, 9:30-10:45 a.m., Smiley Building, 20A. cancersupportswco.org/calendar Yoga With In the Weeds, 10-11 a.m., The Hive, 1150 Main Ave., Ste. A “Slightly Cupid,” informal chairlift dating event, 1-4 p.m., Purgatory Resort.

Open Mic, 6:30 p.m., EsoTerra Ciderworks, 558 Main Trivia Night, 7 p.m., Bottom Shelf Brewery, 118 Mill St., Bayfield Geeks Who Drink Trivia, 8 p.m., The Roost, 128 E. College Dr. Karaoke Roulette, 8 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Ongoing

“Transcending Time with Roseta Santiago,” Blue Rain Gallery, 934 Main Ave. Thru Feb. 16 “The Return of the Force,” art exhibit exploring the influence of “Star Wars” on Native artists, FLC’s Center for Southwest Studies. Thru August 2024

Email Rachel at telegraph@durangotelegraph.com high school for kids to shovel for free and save a home?

– Old Grand Ma Dear Mother Hubbard, If you do call the school, don’t speak directly to the kids. They’ll covertly record you and post it on TikTok, knowing you’ll never find it. Also, what the hey is a fire plug? Do you have fire raging in your neighborhood, held at bay only by the tenuous and honorable service of a rubber stopper? Or… hmm… is a fire plug a new plaything for V-Day? If so, get that thing out of the snow! Unless you’re into temperature play.

– Snowed in, Rachel “Reimagining Success: Manifesting Happiness and Fulfillment,” author event & book signing with Maureen Fallon-Cyr, Feb. 21, 6-8 p.m., Maria’s Bookshop, 960 Main Ave. Birds of Play, an evening of song and stories, Feb. 22, 7-9 p.m., Durango Arts Center, 802 E 2nd Ave. “Fifty Years in the Canyons,” presentation by hiking guide author Steve Allen, Feb. 22, 7-8:30 p.m., Center of Southwest Studies Lyceum, Fort Lewis College and via Zoom “The Wolves,” presented by FLC Theatre, Feb. 23 March 2, Gallery Theatre at Fort Lewis College FLC Alumni Ski Day & Après-Ski Party, Feb. 24, 9 a.m.– 6 p.m., Purgatory Resort

Deadline to submit items for “Stuff to Do” is Monday at noon.

E-mail your stuff to: calendar@durangotelegraph.com

Upcoming Late Night Radio with parkbreezy • Motifvplus, Feb. 16, 8 p.m., Animas City Theatre, 128 E College Dr.

telegraph

Feb. 8, 2024 n 13

FreeWillAstrology

by Rob Brezsny

ARIES (March 21-April 19): In honor of the Valentine season, and in accordance with astrological omens, I offer you a love letter from an unpublished novel by an Aries friend. Consider saying something similar to a person who would be thrilled to hear it.

Here it is. “We will seize the sexiest joy we can conjure.

We will turn each other into boisterous deities in quest of liberation from all unnecessary limitations. We will tenderly shock each other with mysterious epiphanies and rivers of bliss. ‘Wild’ will be too mild a word for the awakenings we provoke in each other’s futures.”

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): “The greater the fool, the better the dancer.” Composer Theodore Hook said that. Poet Edwin Denby agreed. He said, “There is a bit of insanity in dancing that does everybody a great deal of good.” Choreographer Martha Graham added, “Dance is the hidden language of the soul.” I bring these thoughts to your attention because the coming weeks will be an excellent time for you to get freer, more sensuous and more unconstrained. Dancing your inhibitions into oblivion will be an excellent way to pursue these goals. So will doing everything with a dancer’s abandon, including love-making.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Years ago, Salon.com asked various critics to name the most preposterous sex scene to appear in a recently published novel. I was honored that one of the vignettes selected was from my book “The Televisionary Oracle.” As I read the critic’s review of my wild, funny and crazy erotic story, I realized he was a pedantic macho prude who thought sex isn’t sex unless it’s dead serious and joylessly intense. The characters of mine he regarded as preposterous were in fact playing, laughing and having goofy fun. In the spirit of my novel’s kooky lovers and in accordance with astrological omens, I invite you to pursue uproarious amusement while enjoying the arts of intimacy – both in and out of bed. (PS: Playwright Rose Franken said, “Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly.”)

CANCER (June 21-July 22): A psychic told me that in one of my past lives, I was Numa Pompilius, the second king of Rome.

It’s an intriguing theory that could help explain why my horoscopes are popular in Italy. What about you? Is there an aspect of your reincarnational history that aids your current destiny? Or are there past events in your life that are becoming

more influential? The coming weeks will be a good time to ruminate on your history and check in with the spirits of your ancestors and departed allies to see if they have any inspirational messages for you.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Kevin Kelly wrote the book “Excellent Advice for Living: Wisdom I Wish I’d Known Earlier.” In it he observes, “Listening well is a superpower.

While listening to someone you love, keep asking them ‘Is there more?’ until there is no more.”

Dear Leo, this is excellent advice for you in the coming weeks. I urge you to specialize in gathering the deep revelations of those you care for. Opening yourself to them in unprecedented ways will boost your soul power and enrich your wisdom.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Imagine you are walking on a hill at night. You are headed to meet a person you adore, who awaits you with champagne and chocolate.

The weather is balmy. The moon is full.

You are singing songs you both love, announcing your arrival. The songs tell stories about how much you two love to yearn for each other and how much you love quenching your yearning. When you arrive, dear Virgo, what will you tell your beloved to make them feel supremely understood and appreciated?

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Has your approach to togetherness become infused with habit or numbness? When was the last time you got extravagant for the sake of love? Has it been a while since you tried a daring romantic move? I bring these questions to your attention because now is an excellent time to rev up your imagination as you upgrade intimacy, companionship and collaboration. I hope you will authorize your fantasy life to be lush, unruly and experimental. Spur yourself to dream up departures from routine that intrigue your close allies.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Author W. Somerset Maugham (1874–1965) testified, “My own belief is that there is hardly anyone whose sexual life, if it were broadcast, would not fill the world with surprise and horror.” Is that true about you? Even if it is, I’m guessing the horrifying aspects will be nonexistent in coming weeks. There may be surprises. There may be entertaining interludes. But everything will at least be educational and colorful. What are your most exotic fantasies? Now is a good time to ask a willing partner to explore them with grace and humor.

Valentine’s Day cards, beautiful earrings, pampering soaps & lotions, and sweet treats for all ages ...

970-259-5811 • 26345 HWY 160/550 1 mile SE of Durango Mall • www.dietzmarket.com

14 n Feb. 8, 2024

telegraph

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): The Valentine season is looming, and many of us are receptive to advice about togetherness. I’ll offer some principles that I believe are essential as you nourish ALL your close relationships, including your romantic bonds. They are from novelist Graham Joyce. He wrote, “Two people in love don’t make a hive mind.

Neither should they want to be a hive mind, to think the same, to know the same. It’s about being separate and still loving each other, being distinct from each other. One is the violin string, one is the bow.”

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Lately, I have been intoxicated a lot. Not because of drugs and alcohol. Not because I have been doing three-hour meditations or studying sacred texts. I’ve felt so wildly euphoric because life has been dismantling some of my fears. Once it happened when my psychotherapist spoke the right curative words at a pivotal moment in our session.

Another time, I came upon a very large hare while strolling in the woods and had an epiphany about how to heal a painful trauma. On another occasion, I dreamed of a priestess doing a ritual to exorcize my abandonment fears. There were three other events, as well. I suspect you, too, may soon get intoxicated through the loss of fears.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Reading through famous authors’ quotes about love, I’m horrified by the relentlessness of their sour assessments. “Love is merely a madness,” wrote Shakespeare. “Whoever is not jealous is not in love,” said St. Augustine. “General incivility is the very essence of love,” declared Jane Austen. “It is impossible to love and be wise,” moaned Francis Bacon. “Real love always has something hidden – some loss or boredom or tiny hate,” says Andrew Sean Greer. I am allergic to all that noise! I have been entangled in a lot of romantic love, and most of it has been interesting, educational and therapeutic. I am deeply grateful of it, even the heartbreaks. Where do you stand on these issues? I suspect the coming months will provide reasons to embrace my attitudes.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Have you discovered all there is to know about your sexual feelings? Have you come to a complete understanding of what turns you on and how you might express it? I hope your answer to those questions is “no.” In my view, all of us should keep evolving our relationship with eros. There is always more to discover and explore about the mysteries of our desires. Always more to learn about what excites and inspires us. The coming days will be an excellent time for you to enjoy this research.

classifieds

Deadline for Telegraph classified ads is Tuesday at noon. Ads are a bargain at 10 cents a character with a $5 minimum. Even better, ads can now be placed online: durangotelegraph.com Prepayment is required via cash, credit card or check.

(Sorry, no refunds or substitutions.)

Ads can be submitted via: n www.durangotelegraph.com n classifieds@durango telegraph.com n 970-259-0133 n 679 E. 2nd Ave., #E2 Approximate office hours: Mon-Wed: 9ish - 5ish Thurs: On delivery Fri: Gone fishing; call first

Announcements Amy Grogan Block Prints Landscapes From the Heart: An Artist's Connection to the Southwest Landscape.

February 1-29 at the newly renovated Cortez Cultural Center. Reception Sat, Feb 10, 4-6 pm. 25 North Market St, Cortez.

Game Over Carroll-2 Trump-0. Pay up $83.3 million …guilty Friday 6pm Dancing Lesson at VFW Go to DurangoDancing.com to get on notification list.

KDUR is Celebrating 50 years of broadcasting in 2025. Staff is on the hunt for past DJs. If you have a fond memory story or even some recorded material, please email station manager Bryant Liggett, Liggett_b@fortlewis .edu or call 970.247.7261

Cash for Vehicles, Copper, Alum Etc. at RJ Metal Recycle. Also free appliance and other metal drop off. 970259-3494.

HelpWanted Do You Drive to Bayfield?

The Telegraph is looking for someone to deliver papers to Three Springs/ Bayfield every Thursday. Four stops. $25/ week. For info., email telegraph@durango telegraph.com.

Lowest Prices on Storage!

Inside/outside storage near Durango and Bayfield. 10-x-20, $130. Outside spots: $65, with discounts available. RJ Mini Storage. 970-259-3494.

BodyWork

Integrative Health Clinic renting beautiful office downtown. Patio, sunlight, reception with park view. 970-247-1233

Therapeutic Massage Purchase 2 get second at $20 off your trusted Massage Therapist. Text Charlotte with desired dates, 970-799-8950

600-sq. ft. “Seinfeld” Condo (no Kramer though) Fully furnished. N. Main. 1bed, 1ba. $1600/mo. + utils.

Avail. Feb. 15. Short term; long term may be possible. 970-376-3116

Lotus Path Healing Arts A unique, intuitive fusion of Esalen massage, deep tissue & Acutonics, 24 years experience. Kathryn, 970-201-3373.

Call a Lawyer Event Free Divorce & Custody Presentation presented by Colorado Legal Services Tuesday, February 20th from 5:30 pm to 7 pm at the Durango Public Library and via Zoom Please call 970-247-0266 for details on how to attend or visit www.durangovap.com/events/

Animas Trading is for Sale!

Animas Trading is for sale! Unique collection of accessories, gifts and clothing for all. High-profit margins, part-time staff, and seller financing available. Own this Durango institution! Asking $375,000. Contact Jen at jsokol@colepartners.net, (970) 335-9660.

HaikuMovieReview ‘Judy Blume Forever’ Equal parts sex ed teacher, therapist and friend to kids feeling lost – Lainie Maxson Massage by Meg Bush LMT, 30, 60 & 90 min., 970-759-0199.

CommunityService Bring the World to Your Home ASSE International Student Exchange Programs (ASSE), a nonprofit organization, is inviting local families to host a foreign exchange student. If interested, call Elena at 1-800-733-2773, visit www.asse.com.

Office Space for Rent Beginning April 1st in Colorado Heritage Plaza at 150 E 9th St., Ste 200. 305 sq/ft at $625/mo. includes all utils except internet. Internet ranges from $30$50/mo. Please email or call Matt: matt@ homesfund.org; 970-259-1418 ext. 4

ForSale

Books Wanted at White Rabbit! cash/trade/donate (970) 259-2213

Harmony Cleaning and Organizing Residential, offices, commercial and vacation rentals, 970-403-6192.

ForRent

Classes/Workshops

Wanted

Services

Reruns Home Furnishings Side and sofa tables, nightstands, bookcases, cool art, etc. Looking to consign smaller furniture pieces. 572 E. 6th Ave. Open Mon.-Sat. 385-7336.

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Volunteers Needed Alternative Horizons is in need of volunteers to staff our hotline. Next training April 19, 20 & 26. Call 970-247-4374 or visit alternativehorizons.org/ The Maker Lab in Bodo Park Nonprofit provides collaborative workspace, learning and equipment featuring metal and woodworking, laser cutting, 3D printing, electronics and sewing. To join or learn more, go to www.themakerlab.org

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