The Fresher's Player

A note from our editor. .

Why hello there,

Welcome to the Player! If we haven't met before my name is Lucy and I will be your editor for the evening. To our returning members, welcome back you sexy things how I’ve missed your beautiful faces! To our new members, welcome to Players you gorgeous things - I think this might be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

Okay enough flirting (for the moment.) It’s no secret that the past eighteen months have been somewhat unpleasant but look! You’re here! You made it! And there is so much to look forward to. Whether you’re an old friend of the society, or a brand new (beautiful) face - I’m so excited to get the chance to spend the coming year with you.

This year is going to be filled with art, theatre, creation, madness and mystery. I can’t wait to enjoy every moment of it with you, my dearest Player. But before we look to the future, we should look to the here and now. In fact we should look to this very magazine! May the Player guide you through life, may it be there for you in your darkest days, may it inspire us all to become better people but – most importantly – may the Player entertain you for the next 10 minutes.

Anyway enough rambling - go forth and enjoy all that Players has to offer!

Le grá,

Lucy x Con tribu

ntos e v a tors Inaugural media officer & editor : G ra R ie a l C abr , n Luc of the Player 21/22 nell um Lin n y H ielle Fu o olm O'D l, Kall

n a es, E llam, L i l il hai uke C g mO , n y o l Hay rmo Kel ac C h e den r nde i M , Da ce Seir

Hello Players!!

It feels so good to say that. Hello!! Hello hello hello and welcome! Welcome to all of our lovely freshers and welcome back to everyone I’ve had the joy of knowing before. I’m excited to be back and I’m sure by this stage you’re all ready to absolutely barge down the theatre door, I don’t blame you - I’m right there with ya.

It’s been an impressively difficult year. Time and time again I think about how we as a society last year could have simply peaced out and chosen to rebuild our community from scratch, yet chose not to. How instead of rigging lights we learned how to edit films. And instead of doing Get-Ins we were out at 6A.M. in the freezing cold ready to catch that one sunrise shot to be .7 seconds of a montage hot girl shit, y’know?

It’s such a testament to you all that we are here, starting our second (and hopefully last) year of this hybrid society life ready to welcome a brand new batch of bright-eyed bushy-tailed first years into our ranks. Thank you, for that. For wanting a version of Players that you deserve so badly that you stuck around to see it through. Because it’s down to every person that showed up to our events, our festivals, our tech talks, our classes, our coffee hours, our shows that there is a Players now that we can be excited to return to. You’ve created a place for our new first years.

And to those first years, well done for getting here. I’m sure the last year of school was no joke but you’re here now! You made it! Congratulations, because that is so impressive in itself. I promise it gets better, especially now that life will slowly start to open up again. My advice for you is to go easy on yourself. This next year will be a whirlwind of people advising you on the things you should do and how you should act and feel and think and the greatest thing you can do for yourself is have your own back. You know what’s best.

Because boy oh boy do we have such a joyful hopeful and exciting year for everyone! With just as many shows as last year, an exciting calendar of festivals and PiPs and events and collabs and cups of tea and great friends that will stick with you for a lifetime, you’ve most certainly come to the right place.

Players will cater to you if you make it your own. I myself am quiet, I generally keep to myself and I spent all of second year kicking myself that I wasn’t more involved in this funky little society. If anything, I’m walking proof that you don’t have to be bigger than life to find a home for yourself in our shabby little building.

So good luck! Be gay do crimes etc etc and I will most certainly be seeing all you budding theatremakers around once again.

Yours in Players,

Em

Chairperson 2021/22

Meet the committee Em Ormonde, Chair

Em N Ems Ormonde is a chair, I mean THE chair of DU Players. Em has dabbled in most of the dramatic arts, including but not limited to: mime, jazz hands, directing, customer service, acting, envelope licking and reciting all of Barbie Mermaidia. Em is an extremely talented musician with their own EP which no one can hear. (get it because mute...haha..hah 😞) Emothy Ormonde is a knock your socks off kind of writer with that Kafkaesque Orwellian Postmodern Transgenderian flair. Em is a proud father of 13 and Daire is their favourite child. Can't wait to see more of Dad's -I mean uh I mean Em's- work this year.

Abby Fry, Secretary Abby Fry is a 4th year drama student and our resident secratary for the coming year. She's also a deep cover US spy with a direct line to the white house. Also to TMT. but maybe she was spying for us?? We'll never tell.....

Small Fry has always had a keen eye for the stage, so if she doesn't audition for any of your plays, blame your own writing! But of course she is a little modest, so make sure you encourage her constantly to publicly belt some showtunes. When not acting her heart out, you can often find Abby drafting a strongly worded email, angrily mopping beans off of a stage floor or planning her abolishment of acting from Players to form her army of young stage managers.

Laura Shannon, Treasurer Laura Shannon is like if Elle Woods and Cher Horowitz had a tall red-headed child (i.e. double the fashion sense and comedic timing). Laura is the treasurer of DU Players, partly because she was one of the only drama students capable of maths (“what, like it’s hard?”) and partly because a college theatre society was the perfect front for a money-laundering scheme. Her hobbies include cow print patterns, being a Bad Bitch and acting as sugar daddy to the Players committee.

Claire Ní Bharaonáin, Productions manager This is the one, the only Claire Brennan, our superb, amazing, fabulous productions manager here at DU Players.

I know, I know, hold your applause, it’s alright you don’t have to get all starstruck. She hails from a mystical land you may never have heard of, I don’t think it’s on any maps actually, it’s called Dong-knee-gall? I think that’s how you pronounce it. Not only is Claire super hot and smart (I mean, look at her) but she makes up a mean google doc, let me tell you. Who else could get assaulted by spaghetti on stage on the Unholiest of Thursdays (😉) and still look good? Claire was actually voted most likely to steal one of the Trinity deck chairs from campus, a highly credited award that has nothing to do whatsoever with any real life events that may or may not have taken place. This powerhouse of a human being is single handedly making sure your productions stay production-ing, no current apocalypse has stood in her way, so make sure to buy her a drink if you ever stumble upon her in the wild.

Shauna Lynch. Tech. Manager Shauna Lynch, our extremely talented tech manager, it is just so unfortunate that she happens to be from... Cavan.

Shauna is a huge part of DU Players and an essential commitee memeber, this was made clear because they had the ability to manage the tech from 6,650 kilometers away this summer ( to clarify this was in America not to be confused with Cavan) There is truely no better person for this role than Shauna, they will do everything in their power to make sure that everything runs smoothly and sustainably ❤ Shauna can do it all from tech talks , to directing , to coming runner up in S2S quizes (so scarlet btw) to idk whatever those techies ones do ? she probs fixes lights or something too. Anyways all joking aside, Shauna is the sweetest person alive and we feel so lucky that we have the opportunity to take her out of Cavan ... I mean have her on our team x

Aoibheann Moriarty, Venue Tech.

Players boasts its very own cryptid in the form of our Venue Technician Aoibheann. Usually found lurking on the tech corridor with a parcan in one hand and a sewing needle in the other, or swinging like Tarzan between the gantries on a few loose cables, Aoibheann is always available to swear at the tech box, create the most beautiful lighting plans of the century, and show the youngsters the best 00s emo music available. Armed with extensive knowledge of tech and production from hit shows such as the Scooby Doosical the Puppet Musical and Camp Alltar to name but a few, Aoibheann is ready to greet the freshers with necklaces made of can tabs and teach them once and for all that Techies>Actors.

Niamh O' Farrell Tyler, House Manager Niamh O’Farrell Tyler (AKA ‘NOFT’, AKA ‘Niamh O’Barrel Tyler’) is a third year Drama and Theatre Studies student and is current House Manager on the DU Players committee. Niamh has been heavily involved with Players since first year, even meeting the incredibly handsome and elusive Saul Sherrard when auditioning for a show during freshers week! *gasp* Niamh originally joined the 2019 Co-Op, however dropped out to focus on being an elf in Arnotts, a common fate which befalls many performers. They have wrote and performed in shows such as ‘Ouija’ and ‘Feedback’, directed and wrote the freshers show ‘EDEN’ in 2020, most recently having performed as dancer extraordinaire in the Summer Festival Show ‘Grianstad’ and as a subtextual cottagecore lesbian in ‘No Matter The Joy’, and also having experience with costume, stage management and production management. They have guarded the building valiantly during the whole summer and will continue to do so this year, fighting bureaucracy, and often physically scrapping with campus security and leaving them shaking and crying. Warning: do not smoke in front of Niamh; they will pretend to smoke an imaginary cigarette alongside you and quickly run out of breath.

Daire Kelly, Front of house Daire Kelly, our Front of House manager and design coordinator wanted to be a marine biologist. Have you ever seen Daire Kelly and Scooby Doo in the same room? Neither have I but DK takes the award for being most likely to be a cartoon character. You may know them from their work as Dennis the Menace, Donkey Kong and even semi famously as Garfield. One time I saw Daire lift the Players Building in one swift movement with a smile and turn it to be southern facing for the sun. So I guess you could say Players is sunny cause of Daire Kelly’s smile. Also they’ve never even been to the National Aquatic so if you can’t find them in them in the design space or behind the FOH couches their probably gone fishin x

Sammy Copley, Festivals & Workshops Sammy Copley is a third year drama and theatre studies student and is our festivals and workshops co-ordinator i.e., the guy who organizes the theatre weeks with the most randomly obscure themes(that’s right, I’m looking at you Reverie). Sammy is 26.7k instagram followers worth of zen vibes and good times. Sammy made his debut on the players stage during Freshers 2019 in the Trinity renowned ABBA tribute show, aptly named….’Tribute’. Further acting credentials include Ouija at the Trinity fringe festival. Then it was discovered ‘damn this kid can kind of sing’ and since then Sammy has been the inhouse composer for Players on a huge number of shows. Sammy has also thrown his hat into the ring with productions and management and was the assistant stage manager for Bent. So should you need any music composed and/or performed Sammy is your dude #notanAD #Nopayedpromo

Cillian O'donnell, Programmes Cillian O' Donnell - Programmes Officer, Pips lover and rumoured son of the BFG. Do not be fooled by his height (or his beautiful long legs,) Cillian is only a mere 7 years old .... or something like that. Being the first ever programmes officer, Cillian is talented both on and off the stage, from writing, directing, acting to being a lighting pip himself . If Cillian wasn't part of your production last year, did it really happen? From long hair to short hair Cillian can pull of any look. Is there anything this man can't do? ..... except attend his lectures......... But hey! Players is a full time degree right? Who needs to be able to do physics when you can do a stellar impression of shaggy

Leigha plunkett, Basement Little Miss Leigha Plunkett- also known as Miss International (Cavan) has graced DU Players with the favour of being Basement Manager and leaving her duties as Cavan’s biggest bootiest beauty. After marrying her fourth husband, a humble 86 year old farmer and becoming a widow at the ripe age of eighteen, Leigha inherited his tractor and a wardrobe of peak caps, wellies and other treasures she intends on bringing to Players basement of props and costume. Not only is Leigha a costume expert and fashion extraordinaire, she’s also a sexy actress, her latest titles including Dear John Deere and Shifting at Lughnasa. Leigha can be found looking for attention at all times in Players’ own Front of House!

Faith Jones, Ents Officer Faith Jones, Ents officer, started her career as a clown in COOP so she’s well ready for committee.

Buckle up chickens because she’s hosted many great online events in her time, all of them bingo, so we're in for a truly wild year. Her passions include having a quick ciggy outside the players building, having a quick ciggy at metro cafe and of course, completing multiple successful missions to space. If you ever spotted her out on the balconies after hours, no you haven’t!!!

As always, mup outdoor events, mup bright pink suits, and BIG mup for Mr. Greg Arrowsmith, her bestie for life xx

Saul Sherrard, Publicity officer Oh Saul Sherrard the mysterious voice of players. So absolutely aloof and definitely mysterious, so anonymous in fact we will just never know who writes the Players email.

He is talented in the nail varnish department and weaknesses include having a south Dublin accent despite being from Mayo. Always in a group chat with the reliable black heart emoji reaction, Saul will make sure your ghosted text gets some love, even if he doesn’t actually read it. With a Libra sun, a Capricorn rising and a sagittarius moon, this dramatic himbo is well suited to finding exquisite memes for the emails - wait, I mean…

Lucy Holmes, Mediaofficer Lucy Holmes is a famous influencer so could not be more perfect as Players' first Social Media Officer. Arguably the coolest person on the committee, Lucy is (surprisingly) responsible for everything that you see on our socials. She is a third year Drama and Theatre Studies student because everyone knows if you’re from Mullingar, you were cursed at birth to be involved in the arts. Sometimes known as Lucy Poems, she has written several poems and can often be heard shouting them at protests. All that shouting has left Lucy’s voice hoarse husky, which is very soothing to listen to and also very sexy. If you don’t believe me, check out her podcast ‘Are You Two In Love Or?’ (#spon #ad). If she's not talking about how much she loves photoshop, she is most definitely showing you photos of her cats, whose names are Ted, Pusheen, and Tabs.

Players introductory programme (or pips for short)

6 workshops Directing, Writing, Stage/Production Management, Lighting, Set, Costume, Sound or Producing and Publicity (and you get to choose what you do!)

a showcase in week 10

what’s not to love?

A word on pips with our Programmes Officer Cillian...

Hmm… A pip. A tiny, wee pip. A little seedling, spat out from a juicy bite of a crisp pink lady. Or something more. A possible growth, a sapling, a tree. A potential. There’s a reason Pippin was so vital in Lord of the Rings: man had potential. And so do you, lovely reader. So do you.

Maybe not the potential to be a tree, or to have unlimited Pink Lady supply or ride against the Witch King (maybe you do, I won’t stop you.) But by god do you have the potential for theatre, young reader. Maybe you’ve found this potential before, and need a fresh stage to flex your dramatic muscles. Or maybe you’ve always wanted to try theatre, but you’re a little too intimidated by that loud group of weirdos with a bingo obsession and a toxic relationship with asking newbies for fun facts (don’t worry, that era is dead).

The purpose of this wanky sounding monologue is to hand you an opportunity, my new friends. The opportunity of PiPs! The Players introductory Programme (weird capitalisation mandatory), our beginner training programme run every term here in DU Players. What PiPs offers you is a chance to jump into the non-performance areas of theatre, regardless of any past experience or knowledge. The programme grants you 6 workshops in your chosen area: from Directing, Writing, Stage/Production Management, Lighting, Set, Costume, Sound or Producing and Publicity. You will then be handed the reigns and given the chance to show off your newly found skills in our PiPs showcase in week 10.

PiPs is a fabulous way to explore new areas of theatre, to learn more about the overall production of any show, and most of all to meet new people and to get involved here in Players. It’s a window, carefully set up for you to come crashing through, in all your glory and talent. Its room to explore, to experiment, to discover, and to put all of those old hacks to shame by just being naturally better than them (yeah, you know that bits about you).

So don’t be shy, darling. You’ve got nothing to lose and so much to gain. Why even hesitate? Just get your name on that sign up sheet, and get yourself into Players. We’ll be waiting, with a cuppa and a fun fact (optional), whether in the building or otherwise.

And if I’ve gotten too up my own ass and you’ve still been left confused, please send me as many questions as needed. Either hit me up at programmes@duplayers.com, or just come find the lanky man with the bad posture wandering around campus to make up for a lost first year. By god will I be happy to talk to you (and maybe talk about pips too i dunno)

I’ll see you soon, young Pippin.

With all the love in my Players, Pips, and Physics heart,

Cillian.

Niamh’s Declassified Players survival Guide

• NO fish in the microwave; the judging eyes of your peers will cook you faster than any UV rays every could.

• Avoid the Hersheys chocolate sauce at ALL COSTS; what glitters is not always gold...

• The Basement Can has magical properties, one sip could age you 20 years, and also crumble the entire building .

• The pigeons are your friends! Just don't leave anything outside that you don't want covered in bird shit. But they're definitely your friends.

For sure.

• The Players ghost is a generally amiable force of neutrality, but tends to ruffle a few feathers if denied.

•The Tesco meal deal is now your greatest ally and worst enemy.

• Speaking of Tesco, if someone is going to the shop and asks if you want anything, say yes. You do. You think you don't, and then they'll arrive back to Front of House with nothing for you, and you Will cry.

•Aras vending machines require great skill to coax into giving you food, and most times will just swallow your money. Best to stick to whatever is in the fridge!

• The milk is not in date. It's never going to be in date. Don't even think about it

•Showmances....are a necessary evil. Godspeed.

Clara Raventos

An ode to not being old.. .

"Off to college? Ah you're all grown up now, you're not a child anymore.."

- my aunt joked after I received my leaving cert results and for a moment I believed her. I was barely 17 and now not even 20 I feel younger than ever before

You may think you're all grown up, but I can assure you we all have much more growing to do. 20 is not old - it is just an age like any other - An age in which you grow and learn and cry and laugh and fail and succeed just like any other. YOU ARE NOT OLD. You are young and full of life and have so much in front of you.

When you're 12, the age 20 feels so old and alien to you. Yes, you are older than you were but this does not mean "the end," rather the beginning of a weird and wonderful part of your life.

I have heard the disappointment of so many of my peers, fearing their next birthday - "I'm turning 22... god that's so old," - and to that I say you're crazy.

You have so much to look forward to! So shut up! Enjoy it!

Stop lamenting about how you're not 17 anymore - because lets be honest being 17 was a shit time for everyone. ENJOY NOW! YOU'RE THE YOUNGEST YOU'LL EVER BE - ENJOY IT!

Lucy H.

Poetry Corner Voyager 1, September 5th 1977 Have you eaten yet, most unknown spectre? Come visit if you have the time.

Our doors are always open, and Our plates are always warm.

Grow not hungry, nor cold to pass through Our home is to leave us love.

All we ask, is that when Our embers dim, and meals grow scant; When Our forests thin, and hearts falter in the face of foes too great.

All we ask, dear friends, is to set us aside a place.

Luke Hayden

I have not done any work since I got in.

Gabrielle Fullam

I can see myself in the water, this time, It is calm enough.

That when I fold myself over from chill, Readying myself for worship The water commemorates my profile, And I can picture the sea dripping from my nose, Sniffing it back, in all its overcast bottled glory.

When we have screamed enough, I get out of the water and Stretch myself up like a minaret.

Arms in air – they keep talking.

And listening to them, They should be annoying mePj is talking about his goings and his goings to Oxford, Owen has forgotten his towel, And Claudia is impressed.

I shake from cold.

Our frames echo a season not reflected in the wind, I think: the sun is running from us, But then she comes out for a moment While the others are still walking ahead, I turn back and I can see myself in the water, this time.

She blinks at me, says: Do you think things are going to come together for you?

Or will it just be lighting and laughing and trying Not to bleed yourself dry. (it is a trick question) I look at myself; and the sun, and the sea They make an ugly face, But it slips together well.

And she cannot trick me this time, becauseI can see myself in the water.

The Final Curtain Call Lucy Holmes

Enter stage right The final curtain call The gentle fade out into night

Wherever that stage takes you However long this soft soliloquy may be The light, the tender light will guide you Through this wild theatric sea

Eachword filled with feeling With warmth drawn straight from the heart Each line memorised perfectly While you tell us exactly how To play our own parts

With everything in rhythm and everything in time The props are laid out carefully As you begin your final mime

The stories never ending - never bending (I haven't heard them in a while) That cheeky quick wit humour Always followed with a smile Those hard brimmed hats and sandals lie waiting - always side of stage While voices chime in silence "97 you look so good for your age"

And though I know Each spotlight must fade The light will go on shining In those moments that you made

Your friends will meet you cheering Your charm can't be denied But when the curtain closes We'll all be standing by your side

So now your final curtain call The peaceful end - Blackout Exeunt all

Weird Core(ner) with Daire

Senior fresher's week Kallum Linnie

Ode to the Dying Days of Virgo Season

attenborough beyoncé caligula derulo idris

keanu ludacris mulaney pink winehouse zendaya