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PUBLISHER Jennifer Goodstein

Do you remember the last time you felt that moment of

EDITORS Lincoln Anderson Josh Rogers Paul Schindler Scott Stiffler

There’s nothing like getting a laugh.

PRODUCTION DIRECTOR Troy Masters SENIOR DESIGNER Michael Shirey GRAPHIC DESIGNERS Arnold Rozon Chris Ortiz SENIOR VP OF ADVERTISING & MARKETING Francesco Regini RETAIL AD MANAGER Colin Gregory ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Allison Greaker Michael O’Brien Andrew Regier Rebecca Rosenthal Julio Tumbaco CIRCULATIONS SALES MNGR. Marvin Rock PUBLISHER EMERITUS John W. Sutter NYC Community Media, LLC 515 Canal Street, Unit 1C, NY, NY 10013 Phone: (212) 229-1890 Fax: (212) 229-2790 © 2013 NYC Community Media, LLC


satisfaction after making a dead-on observation or delivering a well-timed quip?

We call it a “get,” because that’s exactly what it is — a gut reaction of pure pleasure and mutual understanding that’s as fulfilling to the audience as it is to the person telling the joke. Now tack on a nice, long round of applause and the value of a laugh skyrockets. Money can’t buy that brand of approval — which is why so many smart, funny, otherwise ambitious people take a vow of poverty in exchange for a lifetime spent chasing the next big “get.” Every night in New York City, hungry comedians are navigating the world of two-drink minimum clubs, small theaters and neighborhood bars — all for a few minutes of stage time. Armed with nothing more than a certain point of view and the primal drive to connect, it’s no wonder people speak in extremes when judging their own performance. In the business of comedy, you either kill or you die. With that in mind, we’ve asked a baker’s dozen of Downtown’s most unique humorists to tell us about the best, and worst, gigs of their careers. And in the spirit of leaving them laughing, we also asked for a joke or two that always kills…because there’s nothing funny about the ones that always die.

Scott Stiffler Arts Editor: The Villager/East Villager, Chelsea Now, Downtown Express

Contents LETTER FROM THE PUBLISHER Gateway to Downtown is a guide created to connect neighbors to the non-profit and government resources throughout the Manhattan neighborhoods south of 30h Street. At your fingertips is a list of educational, health, political and cultural resources available to you. Whether you are looking for an opportunity to volunteer or looking for help, Gateway to Downtown will help you navigate the services available and connect neighbor to neighbor. Of course, a neighborhood guide would not be complete without featuring something very special about downtown Manhattan. This year we are taking a look at comedians who live and perform downtown — people who have brought laughter, sarcasm, joy and hilarity to clubs and theaters from Chelsea to Greenwich Village to the Lower East Side. We hope you enjoy the profiles. We want to thank the local business and stores who advertise in Gateway to Downtown. Without their support, we could not deliver this valuable resource guide to you. Please keep this guide throughout the year as a one-stop source to help you solve your problems and connect with your community. Jennifer Goodstein Publisher

The Punchline Who to Call Where it is Located When to Park Zip Codes Downtown Community Boards After School Programs, Day Care & Nursery Schools Comedian Alex Barnett AIDS Services Business Associations Comedian John Powers Comedian Ophira Eisenberg Cultural Organizations Comedian D’yan Forest Education: Colleges & Universities Educatonal Services Comedian Trav S.D. Comedian Cyndi Freeman Handicapped & Disabled Services Health Services Hotels Legal & Financial Services Libraries Comedian Hedda Lettuce Comedian Jenny Rubin Museums & Attractions Neighborhood Associations Police Political Organizations Post Offices Public Officials Comedian Calise Hawkins Recreation Religious Institutions Comedian Bob Montgomery Comedian Rev. Jen Miller Senior Services Sightseeing Social Services Comedian Dustin Chafin Transportation Veteran Affairs Comedian Leighann Lord Comedian Faceboy

04 06 06 07 07 08 10 12 13 14 15 16 18 21 23 24 25 26 27 27 29 29 30 31 32 33 34 34 35 36 36 37 38 40 42 47 48 49 49 50 52 52 53 54



Who to Call

A Quick Reference to Handy Numbers Police, Fire, Ambulance - Emergency Only 911 If 911 is busy Voicedial “0” (operator) and ask for help TTYdial 711 (NY Relay) NYC Govt. Information and 311 Non-Emergency Services Noise, Water, Hydrant Complaints 718-DEP-HELP (Dept. of Environmental Protection). Animal Care Center and Control 212-788-4000 (stray animals) ATF 646-335-9000 Child Abuse Hotline 800-342-3720 Crime Victims Hotline 212-577-7777 FBI 212-384-1000 Fire Department (non-emergency) 928-999-2222 Housing Authority Emergency Repair 212-289-8000 Parking Regulations 212-CALL-DOT (Dept. of Transportation)

Parks Events 212-360-3456 Pest Control (Dept. of Health) 212-442-9666 Poison Control Hotline (24 hours) 888-222-1222 Rape Crisis Intervention Program 212-423-2143 Sanitation Information 212-219-8090 Sexual Assault Violence Intervention 212-423-2140 Subway and Bus Passenger Information 718-330-1234 Taxi Complaints 212-NYC-TAXI Tourism Information 212-484-1200 Towed Away Cars 212-TOW-AWAY Traffic and Street Complaints 212-CALL-DOT Unemployment Insurance 888-209-8124 U.S. Coast Guard 212-668-7936 U.S. Customs 800-697-3662 U.S. Secret Service 212-637-3662 Voter Information 212-886-3800

Where it is Located

Formulas for Estimating Street Addresses Unbeknownst to some lifetime New Yorkers, there is actually a formula to estimate the numbered cross street to many Manhattan addresses from the avenue addresses. In order to estimate the street, take the address number, cancel the last digit, divide by two and then add or subtract the avenue’s magic number which is listed below. For example, 523 3rd Ave.: Cancel the “3” to get 52, then divide by two to get 26, then add the magic number for Third Ave., ten, to get 36. So 523 Third Ave. is near 36th St.

Avenue A Add 3 Avenue B Add 3 Avenue C Add 3 Avenue D Add 3 1st Ave Add 3 2nd Ave Add 3 3rd Ave Add 10 4th Ave Add 8 6th Ave Subtract 12 8th Ave Add 9 9th Ave Add 13 10th Ave Add 14 11th Ave Add 15 Amsterdam Ave Add 59 Audobon Ave Add 165 Columbus Ave Add 60


Convent Ave Add 127 Edgecomb Ave Add 134 Ft. Washington Ave Add 158 Lenox Ave Add 10 Lexington Ave Add 22 Madison Ave Add 27 Manhattan Ave Add 100 Park Ave Add 34 Park Ave So Add 8 Pleasant Ave Add 101 St. Nicholas Ave Add 110 Wadsworth Ave Add 173 West End Ave Add 59 York Ave Add 4

There are special instructions for estimating the cross streets for these avenues: 5th Ave 63 to 108 Add 11 109 to 200 Add 13 201 to 400 Add 16 401 to 600 Add 18 601 to 775 Add 20 776 to 1286 Cancel last figure of building number and subtract 18. (DO NOT divide number by 2). For 1310 to 1494, cancel last figure of building number. For 1310, subtract 20 and for every additional 20 street numbers, increase deduction by 1.

7th Ave 1 to 1800 Add 12 Above 1800 Add 20 Broadway Building numbers from 1 to 754 are on named streets south of 8th St. 756 to 846 Subtract 29 847 to 953 Subtract 25 Above 953 Subtract 31 Central Park West Cancel last figure and add 60. Riverside Drive Cancel last figure and: Up to 567 Add 72 568 and up Add 78

When to Park

Important Dates to Remember As if parking in this city weren’t complicated enough, throughout the year the rules change for holidays and religious observances, some well-known, some obscure. The following is a list of days the Alternate-Side Parking Rules are suspended.

Feast of Assumption August 15, 2014

Diwali October 23, 2014

Eid-al-Fitr July 29, 2014

All Saints Day November 1, 2014

The asterisked entries mark major legal holidays when stopping, standing and parking are permitted in legal spaces. This does not apply to areas where the rules are in effect seven days a week, i.e. “No Standing Anytime” or “No parking 7am to 10am including Sunday.”

Labor Day* September 1, 2014

Election Day November 4, 2014

Rosh Hashanah September 4-6, 2014

Veterans Day (Observed) November 11, 2014

Succoth October 8-15, 2014

Thanksgiving Day* November 27, 2014

Yom Kippur October 3-4

Immaculate Conception December 9, 2014

Columbus Day/Shemini Atzeret October 16, 2014

Christmas Day* December 25, 2014

Simchas Torah October 16-17, 2014

Zip Codes


Downtown Postal Codes



Cooper 10003 Bowling Green 10004 Wall Street 10005 Church Street 10007 Peter Stuyvesant 10009 Old Chelsea 10011 Prince 10012 Canal Street 10013 Village 10014 Peck Slip 10038






10011 10014

10003 10009



10013 10017 10048 10006

10038 10005 10004 7


Downtown Community Boards Community Board One 49-51 Chambers St., Room 715 NY 10007 212-442-5050 212-442-5055

Community Board Two 3 Washington Sq. Village, #1A, NY 10012 212-979-2272 212-254-5102

Community Board Three 59 E. 4th St. NY 10003 212-533-5300 212-533-3659

Community Board Four 330 W. 42nd St., Suite. 2618 NY 10036 212-736-4536 212-947-9512

Community Board Five 450 7th Ave., Room 2109 New York, NY 10123 212-465-0907 212-465-1628

Community Board Six 866 UN Plaza, Suite 308 New York, NY 10017 212-319-3750 212-319-3772



5 6 2 3 1

© Marcy Hargan

Just as New York City has been crucial in making NYU a leader in higher education, NYU continues to give back to our neighbors through the Office of Government and Community Affairs (OGCA) and Office of Civic Engagement (OCE). » Find out about the numerous free and public events happening nearly every day during the academic year. » Learn about our long-term commitments to NYU’s Greenwich Village surroundings. » Access up-to-date information on our construction projects. » Discover our numerous grant programs for local community based non-profits. » Explore our student and faculty service relationships with non-profits, public schools, government agencies, and civic groups. » Find out about our institutional partnerships with community associations, small businesses, BIDs, and non-profits. New York University: A private university in the public service. Learn more today: »



After School Programs, Day Care & Nursery Schools Acorn School

Beginnings Nursery School 330 E. 26th St., NY 10010 212.684.0230

Battery Park City Day Nursery 215 South End Ave., NY 10280 212.945.0088 212.786.1673 130 E. 16th St., NY 10003 212.228.5679 212.228.9907

Bellevue Educare Child Care Center, Inc. 462 1st Ave., Room D-100, NY 10016 212.679.2393 212.679.7366 bellevue_educarenyc@

BMCC Early Childhood Center and Family Child Care Network 199 Chambers St., NY 10007 212.220.8250

Buckle My Shoe Nursery School Greenwich Village 230 W. 13th St., NY 10011 212.807.0518

Buckle My Shoe Nursery School Tribeca 40 Worth St., NY 10013 212.374.1489 212.577.9678

Chelsea Day School

Nursery School • Pre-K • Summer Register Now

Two blocks south of Brookfield Place (former World Financial Center) 319 5th Ave., Floor 2, NY 10016 212.675.8541 212.675.8385

Children’s International Workshop 17 E. 16th St., #12, NY 10003 212.691.8964

Children’s Workshop School

610 E. 12th St., NY 10009 212.614.9531 (temp.) 212.614.9462

Coalition for Human Housing Day Care 60 Essex St., NY 10002 212.677.6990

Dewitt Church Headstart 123 Ridge St., #101, NY 10002 212.505.8050

Downtown Little School 15 Dutch St., NY 10038 212.791.1300

East River Child Development Center 577 Grand St., NY 10002 212.254.7300 212.254.8963

First Presbyterian Church Nursery School 12 W. 12th St., NY 10011 212.691.3432 212.229.4770

Children’s Tumbling 9 Murray St., NY 10007 212.233.3418


Continued on page 11

After School Programs, Day Care & Nursery Schools

Grand Street Settlement Headstart 294 Delancey St., NY 10002 212.777.0656

Hamilton-Madison House 253 South St., Floor 2, NY 10002 212.349.3724

Jack & Jill School 209 E. 16th St., NY 10003 212.475.0855

Jewish Community Project 146 Duane St., NY 10013 212.334.3522 646.365.5258

Langauge Lunch 356 Broadway, Suite A-13, NY 10013 212.226.9926 212.226.3945

Montessori School of Manhattan 53 Beach St., NY 10013 212.334.0400 212.334.0483

Nazareth Nursery Montessori School 216 W. 15th St., NY 10011 212-243-1881

Trinity Preschool 68 Trinity Place, NY 10006 212.602.0829

University Plaza Nursery School 110 Bleecker St., L2, NY 10012 212.677.3916 212.471.1700

Village Community School 272-278 W. 10th St., NY 10014 212.691.5146 212.691.9767

Washington Market School 55 Hudson St., NY 10013 212.233.2176 212.240.0681

Washington Market School 134 Duane St., NY 10013 212.406.7271 646.285.0432

West Village Nursery School 73 Horatio St., NY 10014 212.243.5986 212.243.6121

Professional Training for Young Actors ©

Film theater television commercials “possibly the best training for young actors in NY”

CONSERVATORY TRAINING AFTER SCHOOL & WEEKENDS Including: Audition Technique, on camera, mask, mime movement, clown, stage combat, voice, musical theater. Shakespeare, Lecoq, Grotowski,





I’ve had a few really great gigs, but I’d say the best to date was at Gotham in April 2012. It was a show I produced along with the other members of Comedians at Law — a full house, and the audience loved us. It was one of those nights I wish I could bottle and then just uncork over and over again every time I’m on stage. My worst gig in a way also wound up being great.  I was booked for a private event at a catering hall. The night of the event, only four people — two couples — showed up.  It was ridiculous to even bother with the show, but the venue said we had to.  So, I just started talking to the couples and within five 12

Photo by Jason Taylor

Alex is a frequent performer at Gotham Comedy Club, where he’s co-producer of the Glass Half Full Comedy series. He’s also a member and co-producer of Dads of Comedy and The Diversity Show and is a regular co-host of the Comedians at Law podcast. He’s been featured on Sirius/XM Radio’s Raw Dog Comedy and in The Wall Street Journal, The Huffington Post and on cnn. com. Visit alexbarnettcomic. com, and alexbarnettcomic. Twitter: @barnettcomic.

“The best gig to date — one of those nights I wish I could bottle and then just uncork over and over again.” minutes they invited me to sit down with them for dinner, and they bought me a glass of wine. So, even when it’s bad, there can be a silver lining. A joke that always kills? It’s a

tie: “What if my biracial son asks me for advice on being a strong black man?. . . .I’m not even a strong white man.” And, “I’m so short, I’ve never seen a parade live.”   

AIDS Services Aid for AIDS 515 Greenwich St., Suite 506, NY 10013 212.337.8043 12.337.8045

AIDS Community Research Initiative of America 575 8th Ave., Suite 502, NY 10018 212.924.3934 212.924.3936

AIDS Hotline

800.872.2777 State, 800.232.4636 National

AIDS Service Center 41 E. 11th St., Floor 5, NY 10003 212.645.0875 212.645.0705

Asian & Pacific Islander Coalition on HIV/AIDS 400 Broadway, NY 10013 212.334.7940 212.334.7956

Bailey House 1751 Park Ave., NY 10035 212.633.2500 212.633.2932

Beth Israel Medical Center 1st Ave at 16th St., NY 10003 212.420.5693 Counseling & Testing

Callen-Lorde Community Health Center 356 W. 18th St., NY 10011 212.271.7200

Chinese-American Planning Council HIV/AIDS Services

HIV Law Project 15 Maiden Ln., Floor 18, NY 10038 212.577.3001 212.577.3192

Housing Works 57 Willoughby St., Floor 2, Brooklyn 11201 347.473.7400

Latino Comm. on AIDS 24 W. 25th St., Fl 9, NY 10010 212.675.3466/ 212.675.3466

Legal Action Center HIV/AIDS Legal Services 225 Varick St., NY 10014 212.243.1313 212.675.0286

Lower East Side Service Center 46 E. Broadway, Floor 3, NY 10002 212.566.5372 212.732.5224 165 Eldridge St., NY 10002 212.941.7992

Downtown Health Center 150 Essex St., NY 10002 212.477.1120 212.477.8957

GMHC 446 W. 33rd St., NY 10001 800.243.7692 212.267.1000

God’s Love We Deliver 166 Avenue of the Americas, NY 10013 212.294.8100 212.294.8101



Business Associations Federation of New York

Alliance for Downtown New York 120 Broadway, #3340, NY 10271 212.566.6700 212.566.6707

Asian American Business Development Center 80 Wall St., Suite 418, NY 10005 212.966.6707

Battery Park City Authority 120 Wall St., Floor 9, NY 10005 212.344.5878 212.344.5636 1 World Financial Center, Floor 24, NY 10281 212.417.2000

Asian Americans for Equality

Bowling Green Association 108 Norfolk St., NY 10002 212.358.9922 212.358.9925

26 Broadway, NY 10004 212.363.9152

Boys’ Club of New York Harriman Clubhouse 287 E. 10th St., NY 10009 212.533.2550

Asian American

Catholic Alumni Club 83 Christopher St., NY 10014 212.243.6513

Greenwich House Music School After-School Program Summer Arts Camp Children’s Safety Project

Greenwich House Pottery School Case Management Senior Centers Senior Health & Consultation Center

Barrow Street Nursery School

Chemical Dependency Program

Methadone Maintenance Treatment Program

Seeking help and guidance or looking for like-minded friends? Greenwich House programs and services offer New Yorkers a place to pursue education in the arts, take pleasure in exhibitions and concerts, and access treatment. To learn more about the House, please visit 27 Barrow Street, or call us at 212-991-0003.


Center for an Urban Future

Chinese Staff and Workers Association

cswa.org345 Grand St., NY 10002 212.334.2333 212.334.1974

Citizens Union 299 Broadway, NY 10007 212.227.0342

Committee Against Anti-Asian Violence 46 Hester St., NY 10002 212.473.6485

Community Resource Exchange 42 Broadway, Floor 20, NY 10004 212.894.3394 212.616.4994

Doctors of the World 120 Wall St., Floor 20, NY 10005 212.479.3344 212.479.3338 137 Varick St., Floor 8, NY 10013 646.307.7584

Chinese Progressive Association

Economic Development Corporation 83 Canal St., Suite 304-5, NY 10002 212.274.1891 110 William St., NY 10038 212.619.5000

Continued on page 17

Photo by Camile Arnone


John sits on the Advisory Board for the Gotham Comedy Foundation and performs regularly at benefit shows at Gotham Comedy Club. He’s best known for his YouTube parody of the epic Jay-Z hit, Empire State of Mind. Every week, he and April Brucker tackle dating advice from a comedic angle on On Twitter (@ComicJohnPowers), he’s shared dialogue with Arnold Schwarzenegger and had a feud with NBC’s The Today Show weatherman Al Roker (@AlRoker). Visit and My best gig was at Gotham Comedy Club. Having recently gotten engaged, I was testing out a new bit on relationships and the crowd loved it. There is no better feeling as a comic than trying new material and finding that it works. The worst gig I’ve ever had was back in 2008 at a biker bar in Pennsylvania. I had a

bunch of biker jokes prepared, but decided not to tell them, to avoid putting myself into bodily harm. “Bikers are just looking for acceptance. They all dress the same and wear the same clothes. You never see a bunch of business men outside a Hooters standing next to their Volvos comparing neckties.” They ended up being a great crowd, but it’s always dangerous to censor yourself on stage. A comic needs to be able to speak their thoughts and discarding the first one prohibits that. One of my favorite bits is about the gym. I joined Planet Fitness because it’s a “no judgment zone.” I went there to exercise one day wearing jeans and sandals. They said I couldn’t, so I reminded them of their “no judgment” sign. They pointed to a smaller sign under that one that read “No jeans or sandals.” So I cancelled my membership.  15



Photo by Dan Dion

and drug connections. They were pretty rowdy and drunk from the get go, but I will say they were as nice as they could have been listening to my subtle material about why I found dating so hard. Best show: For years my friend Allison Castillo and I produced a comedy show called Sweet Paprika. After I got married at City Hall, my husband and I decided to throw a party in New York, and why not do a special Sweet Paprika the night before? My entire family flew in from Canada. Many of them had never seen me on stage before, and they weren’t exactly supportive of my choices. What if they hated my act? How would I get past bombing in front of them? I started with a sarcastic comment about how much I appreciated everyone flying in so they could judge me, which got a laugh and relaxed me a bit. They ended up loving it and my mother told me after that I looked beautiful. Not exactly the same as funny, but I’ll take it! Joke that always kills: “My favorite warning I got from a woman when I moved to New York was that no man would sleep with me unless I got waxed. I learned very quickly that I would sleep with anyone after a fresh, expensive bikini wax, because you have a small window to get your money’s worth so you have to MOVE! And I’m half Israeli, so I’ve got about 40 minutes.”

Ophira is the host of NPR and WNYC’s weekly trivia comedy show, Ask Me Another. She has appeared on The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, Comedy Central, and VH-1. Ophira’s debut memoir, Screw Everyone: Sleeping My Way to Monogamy, has been optioned by Zucker Productions for a feature film. She is also a regular host and teller with The Moth. Visit and facebook. com/ophira. Twitter: @ophirae. Tumblr:   Worst show: One of my first road gigs was just outside of Toronto at a venue that turned out to be a strip club that was dark on Mondays — just like Broadway I guess. The owner decided to try a comedy night. However, he didn’t advertise and there was zero audience. Trying to fix the situation, the owner made some calls, and suddenly a crowd came in, made up of all of the strippers and their friends, boyfriends 16

Business Associations

Ryan-NENA Community Health Center The Best in Family Health Care Right in the Lower East Side! Comprehensive Services:

Girl Scout Council Manhattan Chamber of Greater New York of Commerce 43 W. 23rd St., Floor 6, NY 10010 212.645.4000 212.645.4599

HealthRight International 65 Broadway, Floor 19, NY 10006 212.226.9890 212.226.7026

Hudson River Park Trust 353 West St., Pier 40, Floor 2, NY 10014 212.627.2020 212.627.2021

Italy-America Chamber of Commerce 730 5th Ave., Suite 502, NY 10019 212.459.0044 212.459.0090

Lower East Side Business Improvement District 54 Orchid St., NY 10002 212.226.9010 212.226.8161 1375 Broadway, Floor 3, NY 10018 212.479.7772 212.473.8074

New York Asian Women’s Center 32 Broadway, Floor 10, NY 10004 888.888.7702 212.732.0054 212.587.5731

New York City Rescue Mission

Accepted Health Plans: • Medicaid • Medicare • Child Health Plus • Family Health Plus • Family Planning Benefit Program • HealthPlus/Amerigroup • HealthFirst • Fidelis • MetroPlus • WellCare • Affinity • ADAP • 1199/SEIU • Cigna • HIP • Aetna And more...

• Adult Medicine • Geriatrics • Pediatrics • Women’s Health • Dental • HIV Care • Mental Health • Eye Care • Specialties • Cancer Screening Services • WIC Program If you are uninsured, we offer: • Affordable sliding fee scale • Low cost pharmacy plan

“Healt h Car e is a rig ht, not a pri vilege. ”

279 East 3rd Street New York, NY 10009 (212) 477-8500

Joint Commission Accredited 90 Lafayette St., NY 10013 212.226.6214 212.226.6215

New York Mortgage Coalition 50 Broad St., Suite 1125, NY 10004 212.742.0762 212.747.1114

New York Public Interest Research Group 9 Murray St., Floor 3, NY 10007 212.349.6460 212.349.1366

Partnership for NYC 1 Battery Park Plaza, Floor 5, NY 10004 212.493.7400 212.344.3344


BETWEEN 6TH & 7TH AVE 212-912-2300



Business Associations

Pier, Park & Playground Association Pier 40 at W. Houston St., NY 10013 212.989.3764 646.536.3189

Project Renewal, Inc. 200 Varick St., NY 10014 212.620.0340

Renaissance Economic Development Corporation 1 Pike St., NY 10002 212.964.6022 212.964.6003

The Lower Eastside Girls Club 56 E. 1st St., NY 10003 212.982.1633

Cultural Organizations Aid for AIDS 515 Greenwich St., Suite 506, NY 10013 212.337.8043 212.337.8045

3-Legged Dog Media and Theater Group 80 Greenwich St., NY 10006 212.645.0374 212.924.8102

Access Theatre 380 Broadway, Floor 4, NY 10013 212.966.1047 Aesthetic Realism Foundation 141 Greene St., NY 10012 212.777.4490


American Guild of Variety Artists 363 7th Ave., Floor 17, NY 10001 212.675.1003 212.633.0097

American Indian Community House 134 W. 29th St., Floor 4, NY 10001 212.598.0100

American Institute of Architects 536 LaGuardia Place, NY 10012 212.683.0023

Angel Orensanz Foundation

Ascension Music Chorus & Orchestra

ARChive of Contemporary Music

Asian American Art Centre 54 White St., NY 10013 212.226.6967 111 Norfolk St., NY 10002 212.233.2154 360.283.2154

Art in General

Battery Dance Company 172 Norfolk St., NY 10002 212.529.7194 79 Walker St., NY 10013 212.219.0473 212.219.0511

Art Start 721 E. 6th St., Suite 0FC, NY 10009 212.460.0019 12 W. 11th St., NY 10011 212.358.1469 212.254.8553 380 Broadway, Floor 5, NY 10013 212.219.3910 212.219.2911

Continued on page 19

Cultural Organizations

Battery Park City Parks Conservancy 75 Battery Place, NY 10280 212.267.9700

Bleecker St. Opera 115 MacDougal St., NY 10012 917.617.1399 bleeckerstreetopera@

Catherine Lorillard Wolfe Art Club, Inc. 802 Broadway, NY 10003

Center for Traditional Music & Dance 32 Broadway, Suite 1314, NY 10004 212.571.1555 212.571.9052

Chamber Music America 99 Madison Ave., Floor 5, NY 10016 212.242.2022 646.430.5667

Chen Dance Center 70 Mulberry St., Floor 2, NY 10013 212.349.0438

Cherry Lane Theatre 38 Commerce St., NY 10014 212.989.2020

Chinese-American Arts Council, Inc. 456 Broadway, Fl 3, NY 10013 212.431.9740

Clocktower Gallery 108 Leonard St., Floor 13, NY 10013 212.233.1096 Coalition for Asian American Children and Families

Fine Arts Federation of New York 232 E. 11th St., NY 10003

Gene Frankel Theatre 24 Bond St., NY 10012 212.777.1767 genefrankeltheatre@

Harvestworks Digital Media Arts Center 596 Broadway, Suite 602, NY 10012 212.431.1130

Indochina Sino-American Community Center 50 Broad St., Floor 18, NY 10004 212.809.4675 212.785.4601

170 Forsyth St., Floor 2, NY 10002 212.226.0317

Downtown Community TV Center

Japanese Folk Dance Institute 87 Lafayette St., NY 10013 212.966.4510 212.226.3053

Drawing Center 35 Wooster St., NY 10013 212.219.2166 888.380.3362

Engine 27 173 Franklin St., NY 10013 212.226.4281 568 Grand St., J-1206, NY 10002 212.982.6952

Joyce Theater 175 8th Ave., NY 10011 212.691.9740

Lower East Side Jewish Conservancy 235 E. Broadway, NY 10002 212.374.4100 212.513.1332

Lower Manhattan Cultural Council 125 Maiden Lane, Floor 2, NY 10038 212.219.9401 212.219.2058

Lucille Lortel Theater 121 Christopher St., NY 10014 212.924.2817 212.989.0036

Maccarone, Inc. 630 Greenwich St., NY 10014 212.431.4977 347.394.0043

Mela Foundation 275 Church St., NY 10013 212.925.8270 212.226.7802 Minetta Lane Theatre

18-22 Minetta Lane, NY 10012 212.420.8214

Music from China 170 Park Row, #12D, NY 10038 212.962.5698 (extra #) 212.941.8733 212.625.8586

Continued on page 20



Cultural Organizations

National Association of Women Artists, Inc. 80 5th Ave., Suite 1405, NY 10011 212.675.1616 212.675.2857

National Society of Mural Painters

New York Queer Experimental Film Festival

Spring Studio

New York State Council on the Arts

Swiss Institute 18 Wooster St., NY 10013 212.925.2035 300 Park Ave S. Floor 10, NY 10010 212.459.8800

New Dance Alliance 15 Gramercy Park S., NY 10003 212.533.6931 212.353.8140

New School Concerts 55 W. 13th St., Room 929, NY 10011 212.229.5873 212.229.5306 New York Council for the Humanities 150 Broadway, #1700, NY 10038 212.233.1131 212.233.4607

New York Foundation for the Arts 20 Jay St., Floor 7, Brooklyn 11201 212.366.6900 212.366.1778

20 79 Pine St., #132, NY 10005 212.742.8880 450 W. 31st St., Floor 7, NY 10001 212.244.2800 182 Duane St., NY 10013 646.570.1824

Soho Rep.

Pastel Society of America

Paul Taylor Dance Company 551 Grand St., NY 10002 212.431.5562 212.966.5673

Process Studio Theatre 257 Church St., NY 10013 212.582.3300 Salmagundi Club 47 5th Ave., NY 10003 212.255.7740 Shooting Star Theatre 40 Peck Slip, NY 10038 646.825.1864 64 Spring St., NY 10002 212.226.7240

The Battery Conservancy 1 Whitehall St., Floor 17, NY 10004 212.344.3491

The Flea Theatre 41 White St., NY 10013 212.226.0051

The Guitar Salon 45 Grove St., NY 10014 212.675.3236 The New York Chinese Cultural Center & Dance China, New York 390 Broadway, Floor 2, NY 10013 212.334.3764

The Pen and Brush Inc. 29 E. 22nd St., NY 10010 212.475.3669

The Public Theater 425 Lafayette St., NY 10003 212.539.8500

The River Project Pier 40, West St. & Houston St., Floor 2, NY 10014 212.233.3030

Tribeca Film Center 375 Greenwich St., NY 10013 212.941.4000 212.941.3997

Tribeca Performing Arts Center 199 Chambers St., NY 10007 212.220.1459

United East Athletic Assocation 70 Mulberry St., NY 10013 212.227.9452

United Jewish Council of the East Side

235 E. Broadway, NY 10002 212.233.0637 212.233.0637 WNYC Radio 160 Varick St., NY 10013 646.829.4400


My best gig happened in Kiawah, South Carolina, where I was booked to do a set featuring songs from around the world. Two producers screened my act, labeling many of my jokes too “risqué.” That night, a wellheeled audience of 200 filled the house. My warped stage was a set of planks whacked together from an old fishing boat.  I smelled of perfume and carp. My “polite” act, felt just — horrible! So I took a breath and rolled out the risqué bits on sex, the joys and pitfalls of love. Those old Southerners whooped it up! When at the piano, I slipped and slid off the satin cushions. The audience was beside itself. “Hey, at my age, I got a well-polished ass!” They sang with me, jumped up and danced in the aisles. The standing ovation was

Photo by Tiesse Mallon

A Boston girl who went astray and far away, D’yan Forest — 79 years young — is a regular at Gotham Comedy Club and the Metropolitan Room. After having performed comedy in Paris, Israel and Greece, she made her theatrical debut last summer with the solo show I Married a Nun (which took FringeNYC by storm). Visit and facebook. com/dyanforest.

“At the piano, I slipped and slid off the satin cushions. ‘Hey, at my age, I got a well-polished ass!’ ” wonderful, and the high energy stays with me still. My worst gig? Cherry Grove (I still love it!), Fire Island. A 10-minute comedy set to go on at 8pm. Before me, one flamboyant, flambé, flaming act after another. I waited

and waited. Finally, at a quarter past midnight, I took stage. Half the audience had left. The other half was drunk and woke up only to heckle the “old gal.” They thought I was a drag queen, who sorely needed a lift. Awful. 21



Education Colleges & Universities Baruch College 55 Lexington Ave., NY 10010 646.312.1000

Benjamin N. Cardozo School of Law (Yeshiva University) 55 Fifth Ave., NY 10003 212.790.0200

Borough of Manhattan Community College 199 Chambers St., NY 10007 212.220.8000

Carsten Institute 22 E. 17th St., Floor 2, NY 10003 212.675.4884

Center for Modern Psychoanalytic Studies 16 W. 10th St., NY 10011 212.260.7050 212.228.6410

City College Center for Worker Education 25 Broadway, Floor 7, NY 10004 212.925.6625 212.925.0963

Cooper Union 30 Cooper Sq., NY 10003 212.353.4100 212.353.4327

Empire State College 325 Hudson St., Floor 5, NY 10013 212.647.7800 212.647.7829

Hebrew Union College at the Brookdale Center 1 W. 4th St., NY 10012 212.674.5300 212.388.1720

Institute for Audio Research 64 University Place, NY 10003 212.777.8550

Metropolitan College of New York 431 Canal St., NY 10013 212.343.1234 212.343.7399

New York Academy of Art

New York Studio School 8 W. 8th St., NY 10011 212.673.6466 212.777.0996

New York University 70 Washington Sq. S., NY 10012 212.998.1212

Our Planet Mgt Institute 116 John St., Floor 2, NY 10038 212.269.4000

Pace University 1 Pace Plaza, NY 10038 866.722.3338 (toll free) 212.346.1323

Phillips Beth Israel School of Nursing

Pratt Institute 144 W. 14th St., NY 10011 718.636.3600 School of Visual Arts 209 E. 23rd St., NY 10010 212.592.2000 212.725.3587

Skowhegan School of Painting & Scultpture 200 Park Ave S., #1116, NY 10003 212.529.0505 212.473.1342

St. Johns University 101 Murray St., NY 10007 888.978.5646 The New School 66 W. 12th St., NY 10011 212.229.5600 776 Ave. of the Americas, Floor 4, NY 10001 212.614.6110 111 Franklin St., NY 10013 212.966.0300

New York Law School 185 W. Broadway, NY 10013 212.431.2100

Washington Square Square Association, Inc. Association, Inc. a civic organization since 1906 a civic organization 1906 For membership or othersince information Please call (212) 677-6783

For membership or other information Please call (212) 677-6783 23


Educational Services Advocates for Children

Art Institute of New York 151 W. 30th St., Floor 5, NY 10001 212.947.9779 212.947.9790 new-york-city 11 Beach St., NY 10013 212.226.5500

American Language Institute 70 Mulberry St., Floor 3, NY 10013 212.571.1690 7 E. 12th St., NY 10003 212.998.7051 212.995.4135

Chinatown Manpower Project, Inc.

Cornelia Connelly Center

Mentoring USA

Education Alliance

Partnership with Children 220 E. 4th St., NY 10009 212.982.2287 212.982.0547 197 E. Broadway, NY 10002 212.780.2300

Educational Solutions, Inc. 244 5th Ave., Suite 1581, NY 10001 212.674.2988

Foundation Center newyork 79 5th Ave., NY 10003 212.620.4230

Henry Street Settlement 265 Henry St., NY 10002 212.766.9200

Hetrick-Martin Institute 2 Astor Place, NY 10003 866.488.7386 (Suicide Hotline) 212.674.2400

24 5 Hanover St., Floor 17, NY 10004 212.400.8294 212.400.8278

partnershipwith 299 Broadway, Suite 300, NY 10007 212.689.9500

Reach Out & Read of Greater New York 30 E. 33rd St., Floor 6, NY 10016 646.237.0103 212.725.9744

Support Center for Non-Profit Management 305 7th Ave., Floor 11, NY 10001 212.924.6744 212.514.5649

The Center for Book Arts 28 W. 27th St., Floor 3, NY 10001 212.481.0295

Trav S.D. has been producing the American Vaudeville Theatre since 1995, and periodically trots it out in new incarnations. You can stay in the loop at travsd., and also catch up with him at Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, et al. His books include No Applause, Just Throw Money: The Book That Made Vaudeville Famous and Chain of Fools: Silent Comedy and its Legacies from Nickelodeons to YouTube.   Best Gig: Probably my American Vaudeville Theatre’s Palace Centennial Tribute Show at The Players Club, June 2013, featuring Ed Sullivan impressionist Will Jordan, Broadcast legend Joe Franklin, sideshow king Todd Robbins, rodeo roper Chris McDaniel, singers Poor

Photo by Bill Scurry


Baby Bree and Rebecca Joy Fletcher and a few of the Flying Karamazov Brothers — oh, and a tap dancing child performer named Ariella Pizza. I think this was the best, truest vaudeville bill I have yet assembled, and I’m not sure I can top it. Worst Gig: A performance of my American Vaudeville Theatre

“Line that gets laughs: Cracked corn, you say? And Jimmy is responsible? On the contrary, I care very deeply!”

at Todo Con Nada in 1999 that consisted of me, a clarinet player and a crazy woman who talked to a towel. I had a hard time lining up acts for Sunday matinees. Unfortunately, that was the week that a New York Times article about the show hit the stands. There was a line of eager children and their parents out the door and around the block, and us three performers had to don our armor and give the people a full show somehow. It was like making stone soup, but we did it. On second thought, maybe that was my best gig. Line that gets laughs:  Cracked corn, you say? And Jimmy is responsible? On the contrary, I care very deeply!



Photo by Burke Heffner


“I am offended if someone doesn’t scream, ‘Take it off!’ ”


Cyndi has toured inter-nationally with three one-woman shows. She has performed with (and taught storytelling for) The Moth. Television credits include Showtime, Comedy Central and HBO. She performs burlesque, as Cherry Pitz. Visit My best gig is ongoing. I am the co-producer and host of Hotsy Totsy Burlesque — New York’s only ongoing monthly burlesque soap opera. Each month (every third Tuesday, at R-Bar), Joe The Shark and I present the best burlesque talent in New York, in shows that send up pop culture favorites. Past themes include Dr. Who, The Star Wars Holiday Special, Game of Thrones and The Big Lebowski. My worst gig ever was when I was 19. I was hired to be the stand-up comedy opening act for The Erotic Banana Eating Contest. I refused the gig, but then they offered me $50. I told them as soon as someone yelled, “Take it off!” I would leave the stage. They assured me this would not happen. I actually made it through one joke. They apologized and handed over my $50 bucks. Now, 20 years later, I am offended if someone doesn’t scream, “Take it off!”

Handicapped & Disabled Services Association in Metro Area for Autistic Children 25 W. 17th St., NY 10011 212.645.5005

NY Servce for the Handicapped 1140 Broadway, Suite 903, NY 10001 212.533.4020 212.533.4023

National Down Syndrome Society

Mayor’s Office for People with Disabilities 100 Gold St., Floor 2, NY 10038 311

Society for Accessible Travel & Hospitality 347 5th Ave., Suite 605, NY 10016 212.447.7284 212.447.1928

United Cerebral Palsy of New York City 666 Broadway, Floor 8, 80 Maiden Lane, Floor 8, NY 10012 NY 10038 800.221.4602 877.UCP.CONNECT

Health Services Baruch College 55 Lexington Ave., NY 10010 646.312.1000

Asian Care Services Program BI_asianprogram 10 Nathan D. Perlman Pl., NY 10003 212.844.6888

Baruch Houses Child Health Clinic 280 Delancey St., NY 10002 212.673.5990

SINCE 1993, we have made it our mission to provide safe and attractive streets throughout the Central Village, and to promote its history and diverse retail base. Come take a free walking tour and stop by to visit one of over 400 unique shops and restaurants along Sixth Avenue, University Place, 8th Street and St. Mark’s Place. We love our neighborhood, and know you do, too! To learn more about local events and to search our business directory, visit us online at

Betances Health Center 280 Henry St., NY 10002 212.227.8401 212.227.8842

Village Alliance 8 East 8th Street (212) 777-2173

Continued on page 28



Health Services

Beth Israel Medical Center


C.O. Bigelow Pharmacy

Charles B. Wang Community Health Center 10 Nathan D. Perlman Pl., NY 10003 212.420.2000 414 6th Ave., NY 10011 212.533.2700 212.228.8107

Cabrini Eldercare 541 E. 5th St., NY 10009 212.358.6290

Callen-Lorde Community Health Center 356 W. 18th St., NY 10011 212.271.7200 275 7th Ave., NY 10001 800.813.473 212.712.8400 212.712.8400 268 Canal St., Floor 6, NY 10013 212.379.6988 212.379.6936

Community Healthcare Network Downtown Health Center 150 Essex St., NY 10002 212.477.1120 212.477.8957

Downtown Women OB-GYN Associates, LLP 568 Broadway, Suite 304, NY 10012 212.966.7600 212.925.8736

Friends in Deed

594 Broadway, Suite 706, NY 10012 212.925.2009 212.925.2688

Gouverneur Healthcare Services

227 Madison St., NY 10002 212.238.7897 (General) 212.238.7000 (Outpatient) 212.238.7803 (Nursing)

Hospital for Joint Diseases 301 E. 17th St., NY 10003 212.598.6000 (General) 212.598.6336 (Patient Relations)

National Hemophilia Foundation 116 W. 32nd St., Floor 11, NY 10001 212.328.3700 212.328.3777


“It’s Worth The Trip Down The Street!”

28 550 1st Ave., NY 10016 212.263.7300 (General) 212.263.1999 (Patient Services)

Phillips Ambulatory Care Center (Beth Israel) 10 Union Sq. E., NY 10003 212.844.8400

Poison Control Center 212.562.4141

Roberto Clemente Center 540 E. 13th St., NY 10009 212.387.7400 212.387.7432

RYAN-NENA Community Health 170 William St., NY 10038 Center New York Downtown Hospital 212.312.5000


NYU Langone Medical Center

New York Eye & Ear Infirmary 310 E. 14th St., NY 10003 212.979.4000 (General) 212.979.4192 (Outpatient)

NY Downtown Hospital 170 William St., NY 10038 212.312.5000 279 E. 3rd St., NY 10009 212.477.8500

Tribeca Medical Center 303 Greenwich St., NY 10013

Hotels Best Western Seaport Inn

Millenium Hilton

Cosmopolitan Hotel

New York Marriott Downtown 33 Peck Slip, NY 10038 212.766.6600 212.766.6615 95 W. Broadway, NY 10007 212.566.1900 212.566.3535

Holiday Inn Wall Street

51 Nassau St., NY 10038 888.465.4329 hilton_millenium 55 Church St., NY 10007 212.693.2001 212.571.2316

85 West St., NY 10006 212.385.4900 212.227.8136 Soho Grand 310 W. Broadway, NY 10013 212.965.3000

The Greenwich Hotel 377 Greenwich St., NY 10013 212.941.8900 212.941.8600

TriBeCa Grand 2 Ave. of the Americas, NY 10013 212.519.6600

The Ritz Carlton 2 West St., NY 10004 212.344.0800 The Wall Street Inn 9 S. William St., NY 10004 212.747.1500 212.747.1900

Legal & Financial Services Asian American Legal Defense and Education Fund 99 Hudson St., Floor 12, NY 10013 212.966.5932 212.966.4303

Attorney General of New York 120 Broadway, NY 10271 212.416.8000

Lambda Legal 120 Wall St., Floor 19, NY 10005 212.809.8585 212.809.0055 Lawyers Alliance of New York 171 Madison Ave., Floor 6, NY 10016 212.219.1800 212.941.7458

Legal Language Services

MFY Legal Services

Legal Services NYC

NAACP Legal Defense and Education Fund 18 John St., Suite 300, NY 10038 800.788.0450 40 Worth St., Floor 6, NY 10013 646.442.3600 299 Broadway, Floor 4, NY 10007 212.417.3700 212.417.3891 99 Hudson St., Suite 1600, NY 10013 212.965.2200 Continued on page 30




Legal & Financia Services

New York City Civil Court 111 Centre St., NY 10013 646.386.5603

New York City Law Department 100 Church St., NY 10007 212.788.0303 212.788.0367

New York County District Attorney’s Offive 1 Hogan Place., NY 10013 212.335.9000

New York State Trial Lawyers Association

New York Surrogate Court ljd/surrogate 31 Chambers St., NY 10007 646.386.5000

Andrew Heiskell Braille and Talking Book Libr. 40 W. 20th St., NY 10011 212.206.5400 175 North End Ave., NY 10282 212.790.3499

United States Department of Justice Chatham Square Libr. 1 St. Andrews Plaza, NY 10007 (Criminal Div.) 33 E. Broadway, NY 10002 86 Chambers St., 212.964.6598 NY 10007 (Civil Div.) 212.637.2200 (Criminal Div.) Epiphany Branch Libr. 212.637.2800 (Civil Div.) 228 E. 23rd St., NY 10010 212.679.2645

Hamilton Fish Park Branch Libr. 415 E. Houston St., NY 10002 212.673.2290

Hampden Booth Theatre Libr. 16 Gramercy Park S., NY 10003 212.228.1861

Hudson Park Branch Libr. 66 Leroy St., NY 10014 212.243.6876

Jefferson Market Libr.

since 1949

30 446 3rd Ave., NY 10016 212.683.2520

Muhlenberg Branch Libr.

Battery Park City Libr. 132 Nassau St., Floor 2, NY 10038 212.349.5890 212.608.2310


Kips Bay Libr.

Our business is yOur business 425 Ave. of the Americas, NY 10011 212.243.4334

209 W. 23rd St., NY 10011 212.924.1585

Mulberry St. Libr. 10 Jersey St., NY 10012 212.966.3424

New Amsterdam Libr. 9 Murray St., NY 10007 212.732.8186

NYC Department of Records 31 Chamers St., NY 10007 Ottendorfer Libr. 135 2nd Ave., NY 10003 212.674.0947

Science, Industry and Business Libr. 188 Madison Ave., NY 10016 917.275.6975

Seward Park Libr. 192 E. Broadway, NY 10002 212.477.6770

Tompkins Square Libr. 331 E. 10th St., NY 10009 212.228.4747


My best gig is always the last gig I have done. Recently, I performed to a standing room only crowd at Cherry’s (in Cherry Grove, Fire Island). Cherry Grove is the ugly stepsister of the Pines. I prefer the Grove to the rigid social standards of The Pines. At least in the Grove you can have some body fat; the Pines boys have not had a carb in years. Which, in my opinion, makes a girl very angry. My worst gig is a night when I am not working. Other than that, perhaps the night I was attacked by a mentally challenged person while on stage in PTown. One of my best jokes: I suffer from ADD. Ten years ago they used to call it stupid, but now it’s an illness. You know how they cure it today? Speed. You know how they cured it in my day? They’d take you in the backyard, behind the shed, and slap you as they said, “Snap out of it dummy, focus!”

Photo by Manufoto

Drag Comedienne, Hedda Lettuce, is a native New Yorker. Miss Lettuce was the first drag performer ever to headline at Caroline’s on Broadway and has appeared on Sex and the City, Project Runway and numerous talk shows. Her annual Christmas Show, Lettuce Rejoice, has been a holiday sensation for the past 11 years. Hedda just celebrated her 12-year anniversary at the Chelsea Cinemas, presenting classic films, and is currently working on her latest video for her original song, Don’t Touch My Hair. Hedda’s blog, at, is widely read and often quoted.

“My best gig is always the last gig I have done.”




Photo by Jason Burke

“I always get nervous going into wine stores. They start asking me all these questions about what I’ll be doing, what I’ll be eating. I just tell them I’m looking for something that goes really well with crying.”

A stand-up comedian and writer, Jenny had a YouTube viral hit last year with Shit Native New Yorkers Say. She has written for XOJane, hosts a bi-weekly storytelling/ comedy show (The Jenny Rubin Show) and is currently working on her memoir. Visit and jennyrubin. Instagram: jruby70. I’ve been doing comedy for about 10 years in New York City, and recently doing more storytelling shows. I had always leaned towards telling a great deal of stories in my stand-up, so over time I’ve enjoyed combining the two. The best gigs are when I am hosting my shows and in my element. That’s when I feel the most at home and able to do whatever I want — and the 32

crowd feels that too. It’s a back and forth kind of thing, very freeing and inspiring. My best gig recently was at Soundtrack Series, a wonderful storytelling show at (Le) Poisson Rouge in the Village, where I got to discuss a few things I never get tired of talking about — growing up in New York and music. Stories about growing up in New York have sort of become my signature thing. My worst gig ever happened years ago at a bar near the Manhattan Bridge. It was a benefit for animals, which is great — but it was at a dive bar, with people yelling and talking, practically throwing bottles across the room…the kind of gig where you are just managing to get words out to get to the end so you can get off stage, because nobody cares and it’s awful. My most reliable joke: I always get nervous going into wine stores. They start asking me all these questions about what I’ll be doing, what I’ll be eating. I just tell them I’m looking for something that goes really well with crying.

Museums & Attractions American Numismatic Society 75 Varick St., Floor 11, NY 10013 212.571.4470 212.571.4479

Anne Frank Center USA 44 Park Place, NY 10007 212.431.7993

Charging Bull at Bowling Green 1 Bowling Green, NY 10004 212.966.6068

Federal Hall National Memorial 26 Wall St., NY 10005 212.825.6990

Fraunces Tavern Museum 54 Pearl St., NY 10004 212.425.1778 212.509.3467

Museum at Eldridge Street 12 Eldridge St., NY 10002 Admin. Office 212.219.0888

Museum of Chinese in America 215 Centre St., NY 10013 212.619.4785

Museum of Jewish Heritage 36 Battery Place., NY 10280 646.437.4202

shape_ideas In the heart of downtown New York City, The New School offers cutting-edge undergraduate programs that focus on your future as a creative and critical thinker. THE NEW SCHOOL Innovating higher education since 1919

National Museum of the American Indian 1 Bowling Green, NY 10004 212.514.3700

New Museum 235 Bowery, NY 10002 212.219.1222

An Affirmative Action/Equal Opportunity Institution

NYC Fire Museum 270 Spring St., NY 10013 212.691.1303

South Street Seaport

89 South St., NY 10038 212.742.1969

Tenement Museum

Fighting to make Lower Manhattan the greatest place to live, work, and raise a family. 103 Orchard St., NY 10002 212.982.8420

The Skyscraper Museum 39 Battery Place., NY 10280 212.968.1961

The Ukranian Museum 222 E. 6th St., NY 10003 212.228.0110

Assemblyman Shelly Silver If you need assistance, please contact my office at (212) 312-1420 or email



Neighborhood Associations Association for Neighborhood and Housing Development 50 Broad St., Suite 1125, NY 10004 212.747.1117 212.747.1114

Chinese Consolidated Benevolent Assoc.

Friends of Duane Park

Eighty-Fourth Precinct

Ninth Precinct Seventy-Sixth Precinct 321 E. 5th St., NY 10003 191 Union St., Brooklyn 11231 212.477.7826 (General) 718.834.3211 (General) 212.477.7805 718.834.3207 (Community Affairs) (Community Affairs) 212.477.7835 718.834.3203 (Crime Prevention) (Crime Prevention) 62 Mott St., NY 10013 212.226.6280 212.431.5883 55 Hudson St., NY 10013 212.227.5843

Independence Plaza North Tenant Assoc. Samuel Gompers Houses 50 Pitt St., NY 10002 212.982.0990 212.598.0406

Police Civilian Complaint Review Board 40 Rector St., Floor2, NY 10006 800.341.2272 646.582.8062

301 Gold St., Brooklyn 11201 718.875.6811 (General) 718.875.6850 (Community Affairs) 718.875.6363 (Crime Prevention) Crime Stoppers 1 Police Plaza, NY 10038 Fifth Precinct 212.577.8477 19 Elizabeth St., NY 10013 212.344.0711 (General) 212.334.0726 Crime Victims (Community Affairs) Hotline 212.334.0738 212.577.7777 (Crime Prevention)

Eighty-Eighth Precinct

298 Classon Ave., Brooklyn 11205 718.636.6511 (General) 718.636.6526 (Community Affairs) 718.636.6553 (Community Policing) 718.636.7373 (Crime Prevention)


First Precinct 16 Ericsson Pl., NY 10013 212.334.0611 (General) 212.334.0640 (Community Affairs) 212.334.0603 (Crime Prevention)

Police Academy 235 E. 20th St., NY 10003 212.477.7411

Sixth Precinct

233 W. 10th St., NY 10014 212.741.4811 (General) 212.741.4826 (Community Affairs) 212.741.4827 Seventh Precinct 19 Pitt St., NY 10013 (Crime Prevention) 212.477.7311 (General) 212.477.7301 Tenth Precinct (Community Affairs) 230 W. 20th St., NY 10011 212.477.7310 212.741.8211 (General) (Crime Prevention) 212.741.8226 212.477.7314 (Community Affairs (Community Patrol) & Crime Prevention)

Thirteenth Precinct 230 E. 21st St., NY 10011 212.477.7411 (General) 212.477.7427 (Community Affairs & Crime Prevention)

Political Organizations Chelsea Reform Democratic Club PO Box 1120, Old Chelsea Station, NY 10113-1120 212.929.9188

Downtown Independent Democrats

Gay & Lesbian Independent Democrats

League of Women Voters 208 W. 13th St., NY 10011

Indendence Party of NYC 225 Broadway, Suite 2010, NY 10007 212.962.1699 917.348.4859 4 W. 43rd St., Suite 615, NY 10036 212.725.3541 212.725.3443

Village Independent Democrats 26 Perry St., NY 10014 212.741.2994

New York County Republican Committee 122 E. 83rd St., Floor 2, NY 10028 212.517.8444

Building a better world through Emotional Education Little Missionary’s Day Nursery

Eileen Johnson Director

Little Missionary’s Day Nursery Sara Curry Preschool 93 St. Marks Place • 212.777.9774 • LMDN is a not-for-profit non-sectarian school open to all



Post Offices Canal Street

350 Canal St., Suite 2A, NY 10013 212.966.9573


6 Doyers St., NY 10013 212.349.8264

Church Street

90 Church St., NY 10007 212.330.5105

Cooper Station Patchin 93 Fourth Ave., NY 10003 212.254.1390

70 W. 10th St., NY 10011 212.475.2534

Pitt 185 Clinton St., NY 10002 212.254.9270


Peck Slip Retail 114 John St., NY 10038 212.945.0120

Tompkins Square

Old Chelsea

Peter Stuyvesant Village 432 E. 14th St., NY 10009 201 Varick St., NY 10014 212.677.2165 212.645.0327

128 E. Broadway, NY 10002 212.267.1543

217 W. 18th St., NY 10011 212.675.0548

244 E. 3rd St., NY 10009 212.673.6415

Public Officials Assembly Member District 66 Deborah Glick 853 Broadway, Suite 1518, NY 10003 212.674.5153

Assembly Member District 74 Brian Kavanagh 237 1st Ave., Room 407, NY 10003 212.979.9696

Assembly Member District 75 Richard Gottfried 242 W. 27th St., NY 10001 212.807.7900 212.243.2035


Assembly Speaker Sheldon Silver 250 Broadway, Suite 2307, NY 10007 212.312.1420

Comptroller Scott Stringer 1 Centre St., NY 10007 212.669.3916

NYC Councilmember - District 1 Margaret Chin 165 Park Row, Suite 11, NY 10038 212.587.3159 212.587.3138

NYC Councilmember - District 2 Rosie Mendez

Manhattan Borough President Gale Brewer

NYC Councilmember District 3 Corey Johnson

Mayor Bill de Blasio 237 1st Ave., Suite 504, NY 10003 212.677.1077 212.677.1990 224 W. 30th St., Suite 1206, NY 10001 212.564.7757 212.564.7347

Governor Andrew Cuomo State Capitol, Albany NY 12224 518.474.8390 1 Centre St., Floor 19, NY 10007 212.669.8300 212.669.4305 City Hall, NY 10007 311

President Barack Obama 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. NW., Washington DC 20500 202.456.1111 (Comments) 202.456.1414 (Switchboard) Continued on page 38

Photo by Brody Brodo


that he pulled me aside and gave me a pep talk before I went onstage. I loved my “Don’t worry about what set, and Fallon was really sweet. He whispered in my she thinks babe, cuz Indian guys… ear “Now that’s how you do don’t CARE what WOMEN THINK.” it.” Dream come true. Worst Gig: I did a party bus full of drunk asshole friends who got into a fight with EACH A regular performer at the Greenwich Village OTHER and refused to pay us till we got off Comedy Club, Calise has appeared on Russell the bus. The other comedians and I were Simmons Presents Stand Up at the El Rey, held hostage until after the fight, after the FXX’s Totally Biased, Stand Up in Stilettos cake and after three hours of reconsidering a and Nickelodeon’s Mom’s Night Out — and career in comedy. writes for MTV’s Totally Clueless and Girlcode. Fall 2013 marked her debut appearances on Joke that kills: My boyfriend is Indian and VH1’s countdown shows. Visit calisehawklins. his mom doesn’t approve of me because com. Twitter: @CaliseHawkins. I’m black, which is kind of racist, but it’s okay cuz he explained it to me. He said, My best gig ever was performing on Late “Don’t worry about what she thinks Night with Jimmy Fallon. Jeff Probst was one babe, cuz Indian guys…don’t CARE what of the guests on the show, and I was so nervous WOMEN THINK.” 37


Public Officials

Public Advocate Letita James 1 Centre St., Floor 15, NY 10007 212.669.7200 212.669.4701 gethelp@pubadvocate.

Representative District 7 Nydia Velazquez 266 Broadway, Suite 201, Brooklyn 11211 718.599.3658

Representative District 10 Jerrold Nadler 201 Varick St., Suite 669, NY 10014 212.367.7350

Representative District 12 Carolyn Maloney

District 26 Daniel Squadron

US Senator Charles Schumer

State Senator District 27 Brad Holyman 1651 3rd Ave., Suite 311, NY 10128 212.860.0606 212.860.0704 780 3rd Ave., Suite 2301, NY 10017 212.486.4430 212.228.2838

US Senator Kristen Gillibrand 250 Broadway, Suite 2011, NY 10007 212.298.5565 212.431.7836

Vice President Joe Biden 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. NW., Washington DC 20500 202.456.1111 (Comments) 202.456.1414 (Switchboard) 202.456.2461 322 8th Ave., Suite 1700, NY 1001 212.633.8052 212.633.8096 780 3rd Ave., Suite 2601, NY 10017 212.688.6262 866.824.6340

State Senator -

Recreation Arthur Murray Manhattan Dance Studio 286 5th Ave., Floor 3, NY 10001 212.473.2623


Baruch Community Center

605 FDR Dr., NY 10002 212.477.2541 Biz Kids NY Pier 40, West St. & Houston St., NY 10014 646.336.9101

Campos Plaza Chelsea Recreation Community Center Center

611 E. 13th St., NY 10009 212.677.1801

Chambers Pottery 153 Chambers St., NY 10007 212.619.7302

430 W. 25th St., NY 10001 212.255.3705 212.255.3706

Continued on page 39


Chelsea/Elliot Hands On! Lower E. Side II Community Center A Musical Experience Community Center

441 W. 26th St., NY 10001 212.760.9800 Chinatown YMCA 273 Bowery, NY 10002 212.912.2460

Church St. School for Music and Art 74 Warren St., NY 10007 221.571.7290 212.571.7292

Clayworks Pottery 332 E. 9th St., NY 10003 212.677.8311

Dance New Amsterdam 280 Broadway, NY 212.625.8369 212.625.8313

Downtown Art 61 E. 4th St., NY 10003 212.479.0885 19 Warren St., NY 10007 212.27.7375

213-15 Eldridge St., NY 10002 212.979.2442

HB Studio

Manhattan Graphics Center 120 Bank St., NY 10014 212.675.2370

Joffrey Ballet School 434 Ave. of the Americas, Floor 5, NY 10011 972.943.4786 718.228.9612

Koho – School of Sumi-E 64 MacDougal St., NY 10012 212.673.5190

Lee Strasberg Theatre and Film Institute, Inc. 115 E. 15th St., NY 10003 212.533.5500 212.473.1727

Gompers Community Center Lower E. Side I 80 Pitt St., NY 10002 Community Center 212.674.1740 ext. 202

Greenwich House Music School

46 Barrow St., NY 10014 212.242.4770

175 Eldridge St., NY 10002 214.475.7160

McBurney YMCA 125 W. 14th St., NY 10011 212.912.2300 mcburneyymca

Moving Visions Dance 19 Murray St., Floor 3, NY 212.608.7681

Music Together in the City 96 5th Ave., #9C, NY 10011 917.342.1183 musictogethernyc

Natural Gourmet Institute

Peridance Capezio Center 126 E. 13th St., NY 10003 212.505.0886 212.674.2239

Police Athletic League, Inc. 34 1/2 E. 12th St., NY 10003 212.477.9450 212.477.4792

Riis Community Center

80 Ave. D, NY 10009 212.228.3240

Rutgers Community Center

200 Madison St, NY 10002 212.385.9349 Sally Johnson Studio 25 W. 23rd St., NY 10010 212.463.7962

Seward Park Extension Community Center 48 W. 21st St., Floor 2, NY 10010 212.645.5170

56 Essex St., NY 10002 212.460.8163

New York Live Arts

50 Madison St., NY 10038 212.349.3724 219 W. 19th St., NY 10011 212.691.6500 212.633.1974

Smith Community Center

Continued on page 40




Stella Adler Studio of Acting 31 W. 27th St., Floor 3, NY 10001 212.689.0087 212.689.6110

Third Street Music School Settlement

Two Bridges William F. Community Center Passannante 286 South St., NY 10002 Ballfield 235 E. 11th St., NY 10003 212.777.3240 212.477.1808


Wald Community Center

W. Houston St., Ave. of the Americas, Macdougal St., NY

888 E. 6th St., NY 10009 212.686.8888

Religious Institutions Arthur Murray Manhattan Dance Studio

Baha’is of NYC 53 E. 11th St., NY 10003 212.674.8998

Abounding Grace Ministries

Battery Park Synagogue 286 5th Ave., Floor 3, NY 1 PO Box 20340, NY 10009; Services at PS 34: 730 E. 12th St., NY 10009 212.614.0370

Agudath Israel of America

42 Broadway, NY 10004 212.797.9000 385 South End Ave., Suite 1D, NY 10280 212.432.7022

Bethel Chinese Assembly of God 77 Eldridge St., NY 10002 212.226.1156

Assafa Islamic Center

172 Allen St., NY 10002 212.203.8695


Bialystoker Synagogue 7-11 Bialystoker Place., NY 10002 212.475.0165 212.420.8660

Cathedral of the Holy Virgin Protection 59 E. 2nd St., NY 10003 212.677.4664

Catholic Center at NYU 238 Thompson St., NY 10012 catholiccenternyu

Catholic Medical Mission Board 10 W. 17th St., NY 10011 212.242.7757

Chabad Serving NYU 353 Bowery, NY 10003 212.674.1950

Chinese Conservative Baptist Church 103 Madison St., NY 10002 212.962.6040 212.962.6056

Continued on page 41

Religious Institutions

Chinese Evangelist Mission Church 97 Madison St., NY 10002 212.571.1083

Christ Lutheran Church 123 E. 15th St., NY 10003 212.475.5906

Christian City Church C3 Church Manhattan

332 Bleecker St., #D43, NY 10014 212.267.6264

Chruch of the Transfiguration 29 Mott St., NY 10013 212.962.5157 212.962.5217

Church of Our Lady of the Rosary 7 State St., NY 10004 212.269.6865

Church of Saint Luke in the Fields 487 Hudson St., NY 10014 212.924.0562

Church of Saint Teresa 141 Henry St., NY 10002 212.233.0233

Church of St. Joseph 371 6th Ave., NY 10014 212.741.1274 212.741.2147 57 Bethune St., NY 10014 212.929.9498 212.620.3154

Church of the Ascension

Congregation Chasam Sopher 12 W. 11th St., NY 10011 212.254.8620 212.254.6520

Congregation Beth Simchat Torah 10 Clinton St., NY 10002 212.777.5140

Conservative Synagogue of Fifth Avenue 11 E. 11th St., NY 10003 212.929.9654 212.929.0151

Dewitt Reformed Church

280 Rivington St., NY 10002 212.674.3341

Congregation Church of the Darech Amuno Bible Crusaders 53 Charles St., NY 10014

548 E. 13th St., NY 10009 212.254.7257

Church of the Epiphany 239 E. 21st St., NY 10010 212.475.1966 212.477.0537 epiphanychurch239@

Church of the Holy Apostles 296 9th Ave., NY 10001 212.807.6799

Church of the Village 201 W. 13th St., NY 10011 212.243.5470

Civic Center Synagogue 49 White St., NY 10013 212.966.7141 212.966.4968


Continued on page 43

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Photo by Ed Cavanagh

Comicus that was filmed for a documentary about Jerry’s coming back to stand-up — even though Jerry did not come out and I ended up on the cutting room floor.  My worst gig was hosting someone else’s gay-themed comedy night, which they had scheduled on the same night as the Tony Awards.  We had an audience of two, Norwegians with almost no English. That was also my only gay mime show.

Bob is the creator/producer and frequent host of Homo Comicus, the monthly LGBT stand-up comedy showcase at Gotham Comedy Club (first Wednesday of each month). He’s also appeared on SiriusXM Radio, the New York and Underground Comedy Festivals. Visit, follow/ like it on Facebook and Twitter (@HomoComicus).


My best gig was probably one where I got to introduce Jerry Seinfeld at a Homo

Favorite jokes: “I’m now at that awkward gay age. You know, between 18 and 57,” and “I believe that every gay person should be out of the closet unless, I learned recently, a tornado is approaching — which means there are two good reasons to be in the closet if you’re gay and living in Oklahoma.” Finally, I would like to dispel one myth about being gay.  It is not fun to stay at the YMCA.

“One myth about being gay. It is not fun to stay at the YMCA.”

Religious Institutions

East End Temple 245 E. 17th St., NY 10003 212.477.6444 East Side Tabernacle 254 E. 2nd St., NY 10009 212.673.9815

Eastern States Buddhist Temple 64 Mott St., NY 10013 212.966.6229

Eldridge St. Synagogue

Faith Evangelistic Ministries

First Chinese Presbyterian Church

Episcopal Church of Our Saviour

Finnish Lutheran Baptist Church

First Presbyterian Church 12 Eldridge St., NY 10002 212.219.0888 48 Henry St., NY 10002 212.233.2899 212.233.2765 90 William St., NY 10038 212.571.1019 61 Henry St., NY 10002 212.964.5488 212.566.2974

81 Christopher St., NY 10014 646.638.4195 12 W. 12th St., NY 10011 212.675.6150

First Chinese Baptist Church

Forefront Church

21 Pell St., NY 10013 212.267.6436 17 Lexington Ave., NY Continued on page 44



Religious Institutions

Gethsemane Garden Baptist Church

Graffiti Church

Grace Church

Heavenly Grace Buddhist Temple 223 E. 7th St., NY 10009 212.353.3403 205 E. 7th St., NY 10009 212.473.0044 212.253.5954 802 Broadway, NY 10003 212.254.2000

200 Centre St., NY 10013 212.966.6238

Grace Faith Church

Heritage Baptist Church 65 Chrystie St., NY 10002 212.925.1166 519 8th Ave., Suite 807, NY 10018 212.947.5316

Immaculate Conception Church 414. E. 14th St., NY 10009 212.254.0200 212.505.7610

Japanese American United Church 255 7th Ave., NY 10001 212.242.9444 212.242.5274

John Street Church 44 John St., NY 10038 212.269.0014

Judson Memorial Church 55 Washington Sq. S., NY 10012 212.477.0351 212.995.0844

Kehila Kedosha Janina Synagogue and Museum 280 Broome St., NY 10002 212.431.1619 kehila_kedosha_janina@

Living Word Community Church 325 Broadway, NY 10007 212.966.6070 ext. 12 212.966.6315

Lower Manhattan Community Church 342 Broadway, #285, NY 10013; Serivces at Debrosses St., NY 10013 646.397.7051

Marble Collegiate Church 1 W. 29th St., NY 10001 212.686.2770

Mariner’s Temple Baptist Church 3 Henry St., NY 10038 212.233.0423

Middle Collegiate Church 122 2nd Ave., Floor 2, NY 10003 212.477.0666

Most Precious Blood Church 109 Mulberry St., NY 10013 212.226.6427 212.226.1837

National Council of Young Israel 111 John St., NY 10038 212.929.1525 212.727.9526

Continued on page 46


Wherever you are in the journey of life and faith,

Trinity Wall Street’s doors are open to you. Come be inspired, explore Christian faith in a broad-minded environment, and deepen your connection with God and those around you. Attend a service at Trinity or St. Paul’s Chapel, participate in an art class, see a concert: there are many ways to get involved! Trinity Church Broadway at Wall Street St. Paul’s Chapel Broadway & Fulton Street



Religious Institutions

Nativity Church 44 2nd Ave., NY 10003 212.674.8590 212.674.2815 Neighborhood Church of Greenwich Village 269 Bleecker St., NY 10014 212.691.1770

New York Chinese Alliance Church 160 Eldridge St., NY 10002 212.533.3808

New York Chinese Baptist Church 84 Walker St., NY 10013 212.431.0377

Ninth Church of Christ, Scientist 223 E. 25th St., NY 10010 212.679.8193 (Reading Room)

Our Lady of Victory Church 60 William St., NY 10005 212.422.5535 212.785.4457

Primitive Christian Church, Inc. 207 E. Broadway, NY 10002 212.673.7868


Religious Society of Friends 15 Rutherford Place, NY 10003 212.475.0466

Saint Augustine’s Church 333 Madison St., NY 10002 212.673.5300 212.673.5201

Saint Barbara Greek Orthodox Church

Seamen’s Church Institute 74 Trinity Place, Suite 1414, NY 10006 212.349.9090 212.349.8342 257 E. 10th St., NY 10009 212.228.4837

St. Andrews Church 28 Gramercy Park S., NY 10003 212.674.5750 212.505.6707

20 Cardinal Hayes Pl., NY 10007 212.962.3972 212.962.1012

St. John the Baptist Greek Orthodox Church s 27 Forsyth St., NY 10002 212.226.0499 143 E. 17th St., NY 10003 212.473.0648

Saint Mary’s Church

St. Mark’s Church in the Bowery 440 Grand St., NY 10002; Rectory: 28 Attorney St., NY 10002 212.674.3266 212.539.0216

Saint Paul’s Chapel Broadway & Fulton St., NY 10007 212.233.4164

Saint Peter’s Roman Catholic Church 22 Barclay St., NY 1000 212.233.8355 st.peterschurch1785@

Tenth Street Chruch of Christ 131 E. 10th St., NY 10003 212.674.6377 212.674.4179

Subud New York 230 W. 29th St., NY 10001 212.563.1196 Tenth Church of Christ, Scientist 171 MacDougal St., NY 10011 212.777.1717 (Church) 212.777.0323 (Reading Room)

The Brotherhood Synagogue

The Church of the Transfiguration 1 E. 29th St., NY 10016 212.684.6770

The New Seminary 1350 Ave. of the Americas, Floor 2, NY 10019 212.227.3711

The Shrine Church of Saint Anthony of Padua 154 Sullivan St., NY 10002 212.777.2755

The Sixth Street Community Synagogue 325 E. 6th St., NY 10003 212.473.3665

Continued on page 48


When Teletubbies premiered, I immediately became obsessed with it. Though it was a television show designed for one-year olds, acid casualties like me could also dig it. My friend, Ennis, with whom I had a cable access show, said, “You should create a character that’s a bad Teletubby.” So the next week I had a brown Teletubby costume made and “DooDoo” was invented — the Pete Best of the Teletubbies. Doo-Doo had a Cockney accent, several missing teeth and substance abuse issues. Doo-Doo had been kicked out of Teletubbyland after the TV on its stomach broke and only showed scrambled porn. Oddly, both the best and worst gigs of my life occurred while playing Doo-Doo. The best was opening for The Lunachicks at Coney Island

Photo by George Courtney

Originally from Middle Earth, Maryland, Saint Reverend Jen Miller is an “Art Star, Troll Museum curator, writer, painter, Voice of the Downtrodden & Tired and Patron Saint of the Uncool.” Rev. Jen’s Anti-Slam, whose original run lasted 16 years, guarantees you six minutes of stage time and a judge’s score of “10.” Visit

High. The band’s manager wanted me to give away T-shirts. So I screamed, “Who wants to make out with DooDoo?” and the most beautiful young man on Earth got on stage and kissed me. Later, he said, “I didn’t know if you were a man or a woman, I just wanted to kiss a Teletubby.” During that same show, I stage-dove, the crowd caught me (thank goodness) and I bodysurfed for several minutes. I lost a Teletubby hand in the process, but it was worth it to feel like a rock star (said hand was later replaced with an oven

mitt). Doo-Doo, it seemed, was always a hit — until I performed as the opening act for a comedian friend at an extremely conservative college in upstate NY. No one there would even hug DooDoo, and I’m pretty sure I got booed off the stage. I’ve basically blocked it out because I can’t afford therapy. I’ve never considered myself a comedian and I’ve never written a joke in my life — but I do know that if you can’t laugh at a deranged Teletubby, you’re kind of dead inside. 47


Religious Institutions

Transworld Buddhist Association

7 E. Broadway, NY 10038 212.962.1223 Trinity Church 74 Trinity Place, NY 10006 212.602.0800

Trinity Lower East Side Lutheran Parish 602 E. 9th St., NY 10009 212.228.5254

True Light Lutheran Church 195 Worth St., NY 10013 212.962.1482 212.962.1483

Trust in God Baptist Church 5 Elizabeth St., NY 10013 212.925.9835

United Synagogue of Conservative Judaism 820 2nd Ave., NY 10017 212.533.7800 212.353.9439

Village Temple 33 E. 12th St., NY 10003 212.674.2340 villagetemple@

Wall Street Synagogue

Unity of NY 70 W. 36th St., Suite 4A, NY 10018 212.560.0756 212.560.0758 47 Beekman St., NY 10038 212.227.7800 thewallstreetsynagogue@

Henry Street Settlement

Project Ezra

Senior Services BRC Senior Services

Grand St. Settlement Cabrini Eldercare 80 Pitt St., NY 10002 212.674.1740 220 E. 19th St., NY 10003 212.672.6262 Info-CCNR@ Greenwich House 224 W. 30th St., Suite 302, Department NY 10001 212.991.0003 for the Aging 646.365.5730

Education Alliance 197 E. Broadway, NY 10002 212.780.2300


Hamilton-Madison House 253 South St., Floor 2, NY 10002 212.349.3724 265 Henry St., NY 10002 212.766.9200

Hudson Guild Fulton Center 119 9th Ave., NY 10011 212.924.6710

Mott Street Senior Center

180 Mott St., NY 10012 212.966.5460 465 Grand St., Floor 4, NY 10002 212.982.4124 212.677.9134 codirector.projectezra@

Quest, CUNY/CWE 25 Broadway, Floor 7, NY 10004 212.925.6625 ext. 229 Visiting Neighbors 80 8th Ave., #412, NY 10011 212.260.6200

Sightseeing Circle Line Tours Pier 83, W. 42nd St., NY 10036 212.563.3200

Liberty Helicopter Tours

New York City Cultural Walking Tours 212.979.2388

Social Services Administration for Children’s Services 150 William St., Floor 18, NY 10038 212.341.0900

Agenda for Children Tomorrow 2 Washington St., NY 10004 212.487.8284

Alcoholism Council of New York 2 Washington St., Floor 7, NY 10004 212.252.7001 212.252.7021

American Lung Association 14 Wall St., Suite 8C, NY 10005 212.315.8700 212.608.3219

BRC Human Services Corporation 131 W. 25th St., Floor 12, NY 10001 212.803.5700 212.533.1893

Catholic Big Sisters and Big Brothers 137 E. 2nd St., NY 10009 212.475.3291 212.475.0280

Child Abuse and Neglect Reports

Chinese American Department Planning Council, Inc. of Juvenile Justice 150 Elizabeth St., NY 10012 212.941.0920

Committee Against Anti-Asian Violence 46 Hester St., NY 10002 212.473.6485

Committee for Hispanic Children & Families 110 William St., Suite 1802, NY 10038 800.342.3720 212.206.1090 (General Public) 212.206.8093 800.635.1522 (Mandated Reporter)

Children’s Aid Society 105 E. 22nd St., NY 10010 212.949.4800

Covenant House New York 461 8th Ave., NY 10001 800.786.2929 (Youth Counseling) 800.388.3888 110 William St., NY 10038 212.442.8000 Education Alliance 197 E. Broadway, NY 10002 212.780.2300

Fedcap Rehab Services 211 W. 14th St., NY 10011 212.727.4200 212.727.4384

FEGS 315 Hudson St., NY 10013 212.366.8400 212.366.8441

Continued on page 51




Photo by Sakiphotography

bases, they would fly us in for a show on a Black Hawk helicopter. Those shows would have around 30 or so soldiers and take place in a chow hall, with no microphone. No matter how big or small the base, it was always an amazing experience! These young people serving our country were homesick and unsure of what was happening in their immediate surroundings — and a comedy show was the perfect distraction to let them know people care about them. It wasn’t without scary moments. One time while flying to a smaller base, we came under fire. I was frightened out of my mind — and at the same time in denial of what was happening around me. For a second I even thought, “Wow, this is going to make a great Twitter pic!” When I did sober to the situation, I realized my entire life was in the hands of this helicopter pilot. I held on tight to my bulletproof vest and endured this terrifying moment, knowing that our soldiers have to go through this type of experience all the time. The pilot and gunners

Dustin Chafin performs regularly at the Greenwich Village Comedy Club — where, on Sunday nights at 8pm, he hosts I Swear, True Story (a showcase for standups to present material in the storytelling tradition of comics like Bill Cosby and Richard Pryor). Visit Twitter: @DustinChafin. The best gig I ever had was probably entertaining the troops overseas. The whole process is amazing. Some of my greatest shows were in Iraq. Some performances were at big bases, which had large stages and thousands of soldiers. For the smaller 50

where shooting and dodging, like a scene out of a movie. The helicopter pilot was amazing. He saved my life. Afterwards I asked him how he had learned to fly like that and he turned to me and said “Xbox!” Worst gig: I haven’t really had a horror gig in a while (gratefully). When I first started doing comedy I performed at a clown meetup group. Some of the crowd was dressed in full makeup. I would try to go into jokes and would get squirted with plastic flowers. I can still hear the sound of honking horns in my sleep. Performing for clowns taught me to be more animated for certain crowds (clowns are more into physical comedy than quick one liners).   Jokes I can always count on: My girl is a vegetarian. She said, “If you really loved animals, you would stop eating meat. You would only eat, vegetables, grain, lettuce, kale.” I said, “If you really loved animals, you would stop eating all their food.”   The other day a guy asked me, “Why are you wearing a cowboy hat if you’re not riding a horse?” I said, “Why are wearing your hat if you don’t play for the Yankees?”

Social Services

Foster and Adoptive Parent Hotline 212.676.9474

Gilda’s Club New York City 195 W. Houston St., NY 10014 212.647.9700 212.647.1151

Graham Wingham 33 Irving Place, NY 10003 212.529.6445 212.614.9811

Grand St. Settlement 80 Pitt St., NY 10002 212.674.1740

Greenwich House 224 W. 30th St., Suite 302, NY 10001 212.991.0003 646.365.5730 GrowNYC 51 Chambers St., Suite 228, NY 10007 212.788.7900 212.788.7913

Habitat for Humanity 111 John St., NY 10038 212.991.4000 212.991.3990

Hamilton-Madison House 253 South St., Floor 2, NY 10002 212.349.3724

Harm Reduction Coalition 22 W. 27th St., Floor 5, NY 10001 212.213.6376

Henry Street Settlement 265 Henry St., NY 10002 212.766.9200

Hudson Guild 441 W. 26th St., NY 10001 212.760.9800 212.760.9801 Immigrant Social Services, Inc. 137 Henry St., NY 10002 212.571.1840 212.571.1848

National Organization for Women

NY Asian Women’s Center 32 Broadway, Floor 10, NY 10004 888.888.7702 212.732.0054 212.587.5731

New York Foundling 590 Ave. of the Americas, NY 10011 212.633.9300

NY Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children 161 William St., Floor 9, NY 10038 212.233.5500 212.791.5227

NY State Office of Children and Family Services 80 Maiden Lane, Floor 24, NY 10038 212.383.1788 212.383.1811

NYC Department of Homeless Services

NYC Department of Youth & Community Development 156 William St., Floor 6, NY 10038 800.246.4646

Parent to Parent 75 Morton St., NY 10014 212.229.3222 212.229.3146

Salvation Army 120 W. 14th St., NY 10011 212.337.7200 212.337.7299 Safe Horizon 2 Lafayette St., Floor 3, NY 10007 212.577.7700, 800.621.4673 212.577.3897 University Settlement 184 Eldridge St., NY 10002 212.453.45555 33 Beaver St., Floor 17, NY 10004 212.361.8000 212.627.9895



Transportation Metropolitan Transportation Authority 212.878.7000


Staten Island Ferry 800.BOATRIDE 89 South St., NY 10038 212.742.1969

YellowCabNYC 800.609.8731

New York Waterway 800.533.3779 (Ferry) 877.532.8737 (Bus)

Veterans Affairs Montford Point Marine Association 346 Broadway, Room 806, NY 10013 212.267.3318 212.442.4170

New York State Division of Veteran’s Affairs 245 W. Houston St., Room 205, NY 10014 888.838.7697 212.807.4021

Paralyzed Veterans of America 245 W. Houston St., Room 212A, NY 10014 212.807.3114

United War Veterans Council of New York County 346 Broadway, Suite 807, NY 10013 888.821.8982


Vietnam Veterans of America 346 Broadway, Room 810, NY 10013 212.693.1475


My best and most memorable gig was performing at Harvard University for its Black Students Association. I received a standing ovation and Dr. Cornel West (professor and author of Race Matters) came up and complimented me with words that I — an English major — had never heard before. It was great but I wanted to say, “Wait, let me get my dictionary.” My worst gig was getting booked to do a show called Comic Relief for Kids and finding out that it was literally for children between the ages of five and 10. And, just to up the level of difficulty, right before I went on the kids were given McDonald’s Happy Meals. Woo hoo! I’m funny, but I can’t compete with carbs and toys. My favorite killer joke of the moment? I’m torn. I have two: “Women are 52 percent of the population but we only make 85 cents on the dollar. That’s why I don’t feel bad about shoplifting.” And…“A friend of mine believes in aliens. He says, ‘We don’t really know who built the pyramids so aliens must have done it.’ And I said, ‘Dude, I don’t know who put the shingles on the roof of my house. That doesn’t mean the Klingons did it.’”

Photo by Lamott Jackson

Leighann Lord has appeared on numerous TV comedy shows, including The Original HBO Def Comedy All Star Jam, ABC’s The View and Comedy Central’s Premium Blend. She has also performed for U.S. troops stationed in the Middle East and at the long-running East Village No Name...& A Bag of Chips comedy show. Leighann is a popular guest co-host on Neil deGrasse Tyson’s  Star Talk Radio Show and writes a weekly humor blog, The Urban Erma (which is featured on On the web:, youtube. com/LeighannLord and LeighannFans. Twitter: @LeighannLord.

“I’m funny, but I can’t compete with carbs and toys.”




Photo by Nancy Hall

food on the planet — take after take — for 10 hours. I vomited at nearly every break, felt sick for days and the spot only ran once (thus, no residuals).

Born and raised in Greenwich Village, actor, writer and producer Faceboy is a constant presence in the Art Star Studios feature films produced by Jonathan Ames, directed by Courtney Fathom Sell and written by his BFF Rev. Jen (including Satan, Hold My Hand). Launching in 2014: My worst experience as a performer was acting in a commercial for Budwieser. I was torn from the beginning, because I’d had the pleasant experience of receiving big residuals from a previous commercial but didn’t feel comfortable using my acting talents to promote an alcoholic product. The bottom line was that I simply wasn’t in a financial position to turn down the opportunity and (of course) the spot would be done with or without me. What made it truly horrifying was that it was shot at a fast food joint. Myself and three other actors had to eat the least healthy 54

My best experience was, and continues to be, nurturing and collaborating with artists in the Lower East Side. Originally dubbed “Art Stars” by Rev. Jen, I added “Scene” — and the Art Star Scene (ASS) was born sometime in the 90’s. Most notable amongst these experiences was the eight and a half years I produced and performed at Robert Prichard’s Surf Reality (sadly shuttered due to a greedy landlord tripling the rent) and the ongoing collaborations with him and Rev. Jen. Many notable actors, comedians and other artists have credited me with giving them a safe space to develop their work — for which I am both pleased by their success and humbled by said crediting. Jokes? I think the closest I’ve come to writing actual jokes in the traditional sense is my, “List of ‘jokes’ by and for the clinically depressed.” Coming in at number one is, “I’m happy.”

“My best experience was, and continues to be, nurturing and collaborating with artists in the Lower East Side.”

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