Downtown Express by NYC COMMUNITY MEDIA

VOLUME 29, NUMBER 24

Bus rout Parents complain city ignores outrageous school bus delays BY COLIN MIXSON The city’s logs show a sterling record for Lower Manhattan’s M1478 school bus route to Peck Slip School, which notes only two delays so far this school year, each less than 45 minutes, and both due to mechanical issues, according to the Department of Education. But those ledgers are wildly out of synch with the experience of Downtown parents, who claim that for weeks bus drivers ran severely late on a regular basis, and that on one occasion this year — of which the city has no record — a wayward substitute driver ended up taking students as far north as Hell’s Kitchen on a trip that left kids more than an hour and a half late to class, according to one Battery Park mom. “They only have two on record as late?” said an incredulous Stacey Vasseur, whose 9-year-old son attends fourth grade at Peck Slip. “That’s a problem.” Busses along the M1478 route were 30–40-minutes late on a twice-daily basis for nearly six weeks at the beginning of this school year — in part due to the heavy traffic, construction, and narrow streets along the labyrinthine Downtown route — but also as a result of poor planning by the city, according to another mom. “It was very unplanned,” said Maria Wikeldo, whose 7-year-old daughter takes the bus. “The route didn’t make any sense. It wasn’t efficient, and it was inconvenient to parents.” It didn’t help that three weeks in the Office of Pupil Transportation, which oversees city school buses, conducted a so-called “Priority Driver Pool,” and a new driver was installed along the route, according to Vasseur. The problems with chronic delays have since been ironed out, with the current driver, who parents say is well respected and on time, but throughout the weeks-long ordeal, neither the school nor the OPT made any effort to keep parents appraised of delays, despite repeated calls to both parties requesting updates and improvements, Vasseur said. “The school told us to call OPT, so every time the bus was late, every morning and afternoon, we

DECEMBER 01 – DECEMBER 14, 2016

LAGGAGE CHECK Gateway tenants say management is holding rent checks to scam late fees

BY COLIN MIXSON Tenants at Gateway Plaza in Battery Park City have been charged fraudulent late fees for rent checks sent on time, in an alleged scam or crime of negligence that could see the buildings’ management facing a class-action lawsuit, according to a pair of Battery Park City legal eagles. “These claims are 100-percent true,” said William Aronin, a partner in the Battery Park City legal outfit Perry and Aronin. “We are currently considering a number of actions to fi x this problem. A lot of people have come to us with it.” G ateway Reside nt ia l Management officially considers any rent payment received after the first of the month to be late, but tenants have a 10-day grace period built into their lease, so that any rent checks received before the 10th cannot be punished with a late fee, according to Gateway spokeswoman Brooke Shaughnessy. However, complaints received by Aronin and his partner Ken Perry tell a different story, with

Photo by Donna F. Aceto

Gateway resident Nancy Chambers — a.k.a. The Parrot Lady — holds a copy of a rent check she said she mailed on Oct. 1 along with several other bill payments, but it wasn’t deposited until Oct. 12, nearly a week after all the other checks had cleared. So she’s crying fowl over the late fee she was charged.

residents claiming that the management company routinely levels $100 late fees for checks sent on time.

Nancy Chambers, a 73-year-old, long-time Gateway resident living LATE FEES Continued on page 18

Also inside: Hate crimes up in NYC, across country Page 8

BUS DELAYS Continued on page 18 1 M E T R O T E C H • N YC 112 0 1 • C O P Y R I G H T © 2 0 16 N YC C O M M U N I T Y M E D I A , L L C

Downtown celebrates Evacuation Day Page 2

Evacuation Day Plaza celebrates namesake holiday BY BILL EGBERT Well-fed patriots and history buffs turned out at Bowling Green the day after Thanksgiving to celebrate Evacuation Day, commemorating when the British finally surrendered Lower Manhattan to George Washington on Nov. 25, 1783, effectively marking the end of the Revolutionary War. For nearly a century after Washington’s triumphant return to Downtown Manhattan, Americans nationwide celebrated Evacuation Day nearly as fervently as the Fourth of July. But interest faded during the late 19th century — especially after the Civil War, when Thanksgiving took over the last week of November.

New Yorkers still held annual parades into the early 20th century, but formal celebrations ended entirely in 1916 when the United States entered World War I as an ally of Great Britain. But a group of Downtown history buffs have revived commemorations of America’s “forgotten holiday” in Lower Manhattan a few years ago, and last year succeeded in having Bowling Green officially co-named Evacuation Day Plaza in its honor. On Nov. 25 this year, they gathered there to reenact the events that unfolded 233 years ago, for the first time under the newly installed street sign immortalizing the historic moment.

Photo by Milo Hess

The Lower Manhattan Historical Society fought hard to convince the City Council to co-name Bowling Green as Evacuation Day Plaza to commemorate when the British finally surrendered Lower Manhattan to George Washington on Nov. 25, 1783.

“The purpose of this ceremony is to help New Yorkers understand the great historical significance of this area of Lower Manhattan,” said James Kaplan, president and cofounder of the Lower Manhattan Historical Society. “By reviving the very important but long-forgotten holiday of Evacuation Day, we hope to educate New Yorkers and others about the importance of New York City’s Revolutionary War history, and create a new his-

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torical tourist attraction in New York City.” On Nov. 25, 1783, as the last British forces departed Lower Manhattan — which they had occupied for seven years since Washington’s retreat from the city following the Battle of Brooklyn, and for three years after hostilities ended — Washington finally returned to Downtown, and sent EVACUATION DAY Continued on page 5

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Photo by Milo Hess

Members of the the Veteran Corps of Artillery of the State of New York raise the 13-star colonial flag over Evacuation Day Plaza.

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PLEAS NO Hit-and-run suspect refuses plea deal, faces up to 7 years if convicted at trial BY COLIN MIXSON The man indicted for the allegedly drunken hit-and-run crash that claimed the life of cyclist Olga Cook in June faces up to seven years in prison after refusing a plea deal in Manhattan Criminal Court on Nov. 30. Samuel Silva, 26, allegedly struck Cook with his truck as he turned west onto Chambers St. from a southbound lane on the West Side Hwy., before speeding away from the scene. Off-duty MTA police officer Otis Noboa soon apprehended Silva, after discovering him allegedly drunk inside his vehicle three blocks away from where the crash occurred. In court on Wednesday, the prosecution offered Silva a deal of one year and three months in prison in exchange for a guilty plea, according to Cathy Flanzig, an attorney representing

Cook’s widower, Travis Maclean, in a civil case against the city for dangerous traffic conditions at the intersection where his wife was killed, who spoke with prosecutors following the hearing. Flanzig said the assistant district attorney told her that Silva’s defense lawyer, Nicholas Ramcharitar, attempted to bargain the prosecution down to a year or less, but was rebuffed by Judge James Burke, who said that the DA’s offer was already over-generous in light of the charges. “The judge said the ADA’s recommendation was light,” said Flanzig. “He said he’d go with their recommendation, but definitely nothing less than that.” Silva’s chances of exoneration at trial are slim, according to Dan Flanzig, the other half of the brother-sister legal team representing Maclean in his case

Photo courtesy of Travis Maclean

Upper West Side resident Olga Cook was struck and killed in June while biking across Chamber St. along the Hudson River Greenway. The man accused of hitting her and then fl eeing the scene refused a plea deal with a 15-month prison sentence, and now faces fi ve to seven years if convicted at trial.

against the city. “I don’t see it as defensible,” he said. “There were multiple witnesses. He was caught by an off-duty MTA cop. The impact was so severe he can’t say he

didn’t know he hit her. For them, it’s all about the best deal they can cut.” Ramcharitar could not be reached PLEA Continued on page 5

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Fighting for $15 Larry Moskowitz, Social Justice Director at The Workmenâ€™s Circle, was one of more than two dozen demonstrators arrested Nov. 29 for blocking traffic during an early morning rally at Zuccotti Park supporting the â€œFight for $15â€? movement promoting a $15/hr national minimum wage.

PLEA Continued from page 4

for comment by press time. Silvaâ€™s trial set to begin Jan. 25. Maclean said he hopes that Silva doesnâ€™t make a deal and gets the maximum penalty when convicted, he said. â€œI think he deserves the max,â€? Maclean said. â€œI saw him the first time when he had a smug face. It looks like he has no remorse and doesnâ€™t understand what he did.â€? The city recently began work on safety improvements to the intersection

EVACUATION DAY Continued from page 2

orders ahead that the Stars and Stripes should be flying above Bowling Green upon his arrival. But those cheeky Brits had nailed the Union Jack to the top of the flag pole â€” and then greased the pole â€” before they departed. Several patriots tried and failed to reach the top of the pole and tear down the hated Union Jack, but one war veteran named John Van Arsdale managed to shimmy up the pole to deal with this final insult. Van Arsdale had nearly died on one of the notorious British prison ships anchored in New York Harbor. For the duration of the Revolutionary War, with Lower Manhattan as its continental headquarters, Britain maintained a floating gulag where American patriots were treated not as prisoners of war but as rebels against the English DowntownExpress.com

of Chambers and West Sts. in response to Cookâ€™s death, which has largely been blamed on unsafe traffic conditions at the crossing. The work, which is expected to be completed later this week, includes changes to the intersectionâ€™s signal patterns, in addition to new bollards, and repainted crosswalks. The intersection has been the site of 17 crashes that resulted in serious injuries over the past five years, according to Greg Haas, a city planner for the Department of Transportation.

Crown, entitled to nothing â€” not even food â€” killing more Americans than all the battles of the Revolutionary War combined, accounting for two thirds of colonial casualties. As one of the fortunate 20 percent who survived the prison ships, it shouldnâ€™t be surprising that Van Arsdale was also lucky enough to reach the top of the pole and rip down the Union Jack â€” and replace it with the American flag before the British fleet managed to sail out of sight. In Fridayâ€™s commemoration of those events, members of the Veteran Corps of Artillery of the State of New York â€” the nationâ€™s oldest continuously active military unit, which was formed in 1790 by Van Arsdale himself â€” marched from Federal Hall, Americaâ€™s first seat of government, to Bowling Green, the nationâ€™s first public park, to ceremonially lower the Union Jack and raise the 13-star colonial-era flag.

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BY JANEL BL ADOW It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas! All you need to do to get into the spirit is stroll around the Seaport. DECKED OUT… Fulton St. is full of holiday glory. On Tuesday night, the neighborhood celebrated the 33rdannual tree lighting in a spectacular display of seasonal festiveness. Hundreds of locals and tourists turned out despite the rain to mark our biggest holiday night ever. Thanks to TV’s Hallmark Channel, the Seaport mimicked one of the network’s Christmas classics, from the dazzling lights down to its cobbled streets. This year’s 60-foot Norway spruce hailed from Hinsdale, PA. Its “Constellation” theme décor — from compasses to stars — cover the branches in stellar style, representing our nautical past. Headlining the fun was 12-year-old sensation Grace VanderWaal, the adorable ukulele-playing singer/songwriter who won the 11th season of America’s Got Talent. Seems like every day leading up to Dec. 25 has a marketing twist and Tuesday was no different. The treelighting took place on Giving Tuesday, “a global day of giving,” and the Howard Hughes Corporation made a $25,000 donation to the Peck Slip School music program to help fund a full-time music teacher and buy needed musical instruments. SHOP ’TILL YOU DROP… Keeping in the holiday buy, buy, buy spirit, the HHC has lined up some of the city’s top indie artists, designers and moguls for a

unique shopping experience: The Hester Street Fair Holiday Market. From clever children’s reads (Home Grown Books) to silly socks (Jimmy Lion), to fashforward sneakers (Triesti), to chocolate to die for (Eat Chic Chocolates), you’re sure to find something for someone to wrap up for everyone. The street shops stay open daily, 11 a.m.–8 p.m., through Christmas Eve. PAWS UP… And speaking of shopping locally, our own Salty Paw maven Amanda Zink went national on The Today Show for Small Business Saturday. Appearing with a pup and Al Roker, she touted the importance of supporting mom and pop shops. Nice job, and she looked great, too! COMING SOON, WE HOPE… Update on the Bridge Café: neighbors have been excitedly stopping by the neighborhood haunt since the sign lit up again a few months ago. Now the paper is off the front window on Water Street showing off its new wrought iron grids. So we had to ring up proprietor Adam Weprin. When will the Bridge fi nally reopen after it was shuttered by Hurricane Sandy? “Soon,” is all he’ll divulge beyond the “two months” he’s been optimistically telling us for the past two years. He’s still waiting on Verizon. But hopefully, he says within the month he’ll have “the rest of the paper removed from the windows,” the dining room cleaned, and everything set to look as if “it was just closed for the night.” It’s been a long slog. He still

Photo by Milo Hess

Seaport developer Howard Hughes Corp. got into the spirit of “Giving Tuesday,” with CEO David Weinreb, at the far right, handing over a $25,000 donation to Peck Slip School principal Maggie Siena, second from left, and music teacher Michele Kishlansky, far left, to fund the school’s music programs.

December 01 -14, 2016

Photo by Milo Hess

The damp weather couldn’t put a damper on the festive mood at the South Street Seaport Tuesday night for the 33rd-annual tree-lighting ceremony.

needs to inventory furniture, dishes and cookware saved from the flood, search for a chef, and fi nd a new staff. “Maybe by March,” Weprin says. “We’ll start with the softest of soft openings. Then comes the party.” We long-time neighbors can’t wait. ALL HANDS ON DECK… Lend your support to the community on Monday, Dec. 5, 7:15–8:15 p.m. The Old Seaport Alliance is looking for volunteers meet one another and begin planning fun events for 2017, including the group’s 2nd-annual fund-raising gala aboard the newly refurbished Wavertree, and plans for a Peck Slip redesign. Location TBA, so RSVP to heather@oldseaportny.com. CUDDLE UP AND KEEP WARM… Bring a blanket and settle in for some fun and thoughtful mini-movies from around the world. Animation Nights New York (ANNY) has DEC Bijou happening on Wednesday, Dec. 14, 8

p.m., in their space at 180 Maiden Lane. Delight in such shorts as “First Snow” by Czech filmmaker Lenka Ivancikoa. Great way to spend a night, meet new folks and break out of the holiday madness. PRINTING PARTY… So the South Street Seaport Museum held its fourth annual Wayzgoose recently. In case you haven’t a clue… it’s an old-time printer’s party to celebrate the change of the seasons. To continue the stamping fun, Bowne Printers (209 & 211 Water St.) has scheduled a few more events to mark holidays. The three-hour classes include making your own Christmas cards, designing custom stationery, and binding personal books. Great gifts and a fun way to spend the afternoon. For details: https://southstreetseaportmuseum.org/education/bowne-printersworkshops/. Happy holidays everyone, and looking forward to a wonderful new year! DowntownExpress.com

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December 01 -14, 2016

Love trumps hate City mobilizes to combat surge in hate crimes after divisive election BY DENNIS LYNCH Hate crimes have surged in New York City during this divisive election year, and show no signs of letting up, but authorities at the state and local levels are mobilizing to address the problem. The NYPD has logged 25 percent more bias crimes so far this year over the same period last year — rising from 261 to 350— a rate on pace make 2016 the worst year for hate crimes in the city in at least eight years, according to the NYPD’s available figures. “The trends are a bit disturbing,” said Police Commissioner James O’Neill during an appearance on John Catsimatidis’s radio show WNYM on Nov. 20. “More than an uptick.” Hate crimes against Muslims more than doubled from last year and antiSemitic crimes rose nine percent, O’Neill said, attributing the increase partly to the heated rhetoric surrounding the presidential election. The spike in hate crimes around the state prompted Gov. Andrew Cuomo to create a State Police Hate Crime Unit comprised of investigators trained as “bias crime specialists” that will assist local district attorneys to prosecute hate crimes. Nationwide, the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) has independently collected reports of nearly 900 incidents of “hateful harassment” perpetrated around the country in just the first 10 days since President-elect Trump defeated Hillary Clinton on Nov. 8. The organization compiled the list from news articles and social media, but also collected submissions from outside the organization. “Anti-immigrant” incidents were the most prevalent, and more than a third of those alleged incidents occurred in the first three days following Trump’s victory. But are there really more hate crimes being committed this year, or are we only seeing more because the media is covering them? Looking at the numbers, John Jay College of Criminal Justice professor Frank Pezzella said that, unfortunately, it’s likely to be the former. “I think the election illuminated how divisive things really are, and hate crimes spike during times of economic upheaval, strife and the emergence of identity groups — every group wants to be iden-

December 01 -14, 2016

tified and taken care of because of the problems that relate to them,” Pezzella said, referring to the normalization of formerly fringe ideologies, such as the “alt-right” white-nationalist movement and its “unabashed advocacy to return back to the things that used to be.” The connection to the presidential election is clear in some cases. The NYPD is investigating the swastikas and “Go Trump” messages crudely spraypainted at Adam Yauch Park in Brooklyn Heights on November 18 as a hate crime. State Sen. Brad Hoylman (D–West Village), an openly gay man who belongs to a Village synagogue, was in the news twice in the last two weeks for encountering anti-Semitic messages. First, a woman found a swastika carved into a door in his apartment building, which made some national news. Then a few days later the senator opened an envelope in his mail to find an antiSemitic, anti-Israel pamphlet with pictures of flames, human sacrifices, and Bible quotes. The return address led to a known far-right extremist living in Arizona. Hoylman said he believes the acts were directly related to Trump’s election and the President-elect’s choice of Steve Bannon — whom he called a “white nationalist” — for a senior cabinet position. “I’m very concerned about it [the trend of hate crimes] especially since Steve Bannon has been put in a top White House post,” Hoylman said. “I strongly believe Trump should rescind his appointment, all of us should be concerned about that.” The SPLC has not verified every incident they’ve recorded, and we won’t have an “official” number for this year’s bias crimes nationwide until next year when the Federal Bureau of Investigation releases its hate crime report for 2016 in its Uniform Crime Reporting (UCR) program. The UCR is the most comprehensive report on hate crimes in the country. But watchdogs warn that the UCR is flawed, and even if it were perfect, it wouldn’t really paint the whole picture. The UCR is entirely voluntary and at least 4,000 law enforcement agencies nationwide do not participate in its hate crime reporting. Around 1,750 departments out of the 15,000 departments

Office of State Sen. Brad Hoylman

State Sen. Brad Hoylman, center, led a press conference in Washington Square with fellow local politicians, faith leaders and university presidents on Nov. 17 to decry the recent spate of hateful graffi ti and messages around the West Village and on two of its university campuses. Hoylman and his family have been viciously targeted on Twitter by right-wingers, an elevator in his building was defaced with swastikas (right) and, three days after the this press conference, he received a packet of anti-Semitic hate mail.

that do participate have reported hate crime incidents. Even New York State under-reported its bias crimes in past years due to inconsistencies between the city and state hate crime reporting discovered after Hoylman successfully petitioned the State Comptroller to audit the two systems in 2013. The comptroller found that between 2010 and 2012, there were errors in reporting when the NYPD communicated its statistics to the state, meaning the state counted fewer hate crimes in the city than NYPD had and subsequently reported lower numbers to the

federal government. For example, the audit found that the state reporting system only allowed a single bias per incident, even if there were multiple prejudices in play. The comptroller pointed out in one case “an agency reported multiple biases on its hate crime incident report: both anti-male homosexual and anti-Arab. Because its system allows staff to only record one bias per incident, the [state] division reported the case only as an anti-male homosexual incident.” But even with full reporting, Pezzella HATE CRIMES Continued on page 10

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HATE CRIMES Continued from page 8

said that the national figure would likely still be lower than the actual number of bias incidents that happen nationwide. For one, small departments across the country might not have the resources to properly train their officers to identify a hate crime, which isn’t as easy as it sounds. An officer responding to a call typically has only a few minutes to assess if bias played a role in an incident, Pezzella said. Offenders, knowing that a hate crime is more seriously punished, often try to hide their bias, and the vast majority of incidents are not as cut and dry as an offender admitting to a deepseated hatred of Jews or black people, for example, Pezzella said. “Just calling someone a name is not enough to do it, and often what happens is officers think why take the chance to arrest for a hate crime when you can just arrest for an ordinary crime — there’s possibly a better chance of sticking, of getting a conviction,” Pezzella said. “You also have to prove motivation.” The officer has to identify that a perpetrator had a “bias motivation” during the act of a crime such as a robbery, harassment, or assault to arrest a person for perpetrating a hate crime. Political affiliation is not grounds for

a hate crime charge at the federal level or by New York state law, so many politically motivated assaults in the news recently won’t pass muster. For example, the NYPD is not investigating as a hate crime the case at a Boerum Hill diner when a man punched a woman in the face after an argument about Trump’s election. Similarly, offhanded anti-immigrant comments made by visitors to the Tenement Museum on the Lower East Side aren’t serious enough in the eyes of the law to warrant hate crime status either. That type of incident is typical of what many have encountered this year, according to Shelby Chestnut of the Anti-Violence Project, a Chelsea-based advocacy group that focuses on empowering LGBTQ communities to combat violence. “So much of what people are experiencing doesn’t necessarily fit into the framework of a ‘bias incident’ that police deem to investigate. There’s more of a general feeling of being unsafe in our communities,” she said. “There’s a sentiment that it’s suddenly okay to be anti-LGBT, anti-immigrant, anti-Muslim following this election.” Furthermore, victims of hate crimes are not always willing to report incidents to police in the first place, accord-

Office of Sen. Daniel Squadron

Parents found swastikas and the phrase “Go Trump” scrawled on playground equipment when they took their kids to play in Brooklyn’s Adam Yauch Park on Nov. 17.

ing to Pezzella’s John Jay colleague, Eric Piza, who noted that the federal Crime Victimization Survey found last year that 47 percent of victims of all types of crimes do not report them to police. “There’s a whole host of reason why people might not report a hate crime,” said Piza, an assistant professor at John Jay and former Newark Police

Department crime analyst. “One is that for the victim, it’s a traumatic experience and people want that to be over as soon as possible. In a lot of cases, you have to wait for police, make a statement, and especially if there’s a low likelihood of the person being caught, there’s a low chance they want to do that. And the other side of it is that some people think the police won’t take their side of the story.” Pezzella added that the NYPD has a “built-in problem” because many groups protected by hate crime statutes often have, or historically had, a strained relationship with the police — including Muslims, racial minorities, and LGBTQ individuals. The fear of or animosity toward police can discourage victims from dialing 911. Chestnut said that fear of deportation or legal trouble is particularly palpable in the immigrant LGBTQ community, even in so-called “sanctuary cities” such as New York, where the police department doesn’t work directly with federal immigration enforcement agencies. “It is ultimately dangerous to report incidence of violence to police where you could be targeted for your immigration status, if you’re an LGBTQ immigrant you are at a much greater risk — the fear HATE CRIMES Continued on page 14

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December 01 -14, 2016

CHECK FOR A UNIFORM A man drove off with a woman’s fancy car after her husband mistook him for a valet and handed him her keys outside Sixth Avenue’s Roxy Hotel on Nov. 25. The victim told police that her husband pulled up in his wife’s 2014 Infi nity Qx60 outside the entrance of the swanky boutique hotel between White and Walker Sts. at 6:50 a.m., and then tossed her keys to a man out front he assumed was the Roxy’s valet. But the unaffiliated bystander — who was wearing street clothes, not a uniform — accepted the generous offer and drove off with the woman’s pricey ride not to be heard from since seen since, cops said. The Roxy does indeed offer valet parking, for $55 a day, but guests are instructed to leave the car on Church St. with a bellhop, who are easily identifi able by their navy blue uniforms, according to a concierge at the hotel.

WHOPPER Two goons jumped a 15-year-old boy inside a Fulton St. fast food joint on Nov. 23. The victim told police that he was inside the eatery between Dutch and William Sts. at 4 p.m., when one of the nogoodniks sucker punched him, leaving him with a nasty shiner. With the boy left stunned, the pair rummaged through his pockets and grabbed his $500 Galaxy Grand Prime cellphone before fleeing, cops said.

SLICK SWIPE A thief dipped into a woman’s backpack on Vesey St. on Nov. 23, coming out with her wallet. The victim told police that she was near Church St. at 3:05 p.m., when she felt the flap of her bag snap open. Looking back, she caught a glimpse of the crook as he turned tail and fled, and soon discovered that her wallet had vanished along with the goon, cops said.

$4K MEAL A pickpocket dipped into a man’s jacket inside a Liberty St. diner on Nov. 23, nabbing credit cards that later fueled a more than $4,000 illicit spending spree. The victim told police that he was sitting inside the restaurant near West St. at 1:15 pm, his jacket slung over the

December 01 -14, 2016

back of his chair as he ate. The man recalls feeling someone brush passed him as he dined, but only later discovered that his wallet had been nabbed, cops said.

GADGET GRAB Cops busted a man for allegedly nabbing more than $8,000 worth of electronics from a West Broadway warehouse during a crime spree than began on Nov. 21. The suspect ripped open boxes and nabbed numerous iPhones and laptops from the supply depot near Leonard St. between Nov. 21 and Nov. 23, before attempting to sell his ill-gotten electronics on the street, cops said.

BIKER GANG A pair of bike-borne bandits snatched an iPhone 6 from a woman’s hand on Greenwich St. on Nov. 22. The victim told police that she was between Harrison and Jay Sts. at 7:35 p.m., when suddenly the pricey cell was snatched from her hands. Looking up, the woman spied two bikers speeding away, and assumed her phone had gone with them, cops said.

BOUTIQUE BANDITS A pickpocket lifted a wallet full of cash off a woman inside a Broadway fashion boutique on Nov. 27. The victim told police she was browsing the shelves of the fancy fashion outlet between Spring and Prince streets at 6:20 pm, when another “shopper” jostled her as he moved between the aisles. The woman later discovered her wallet, along with the $900 it contained, were gone, cops said.

CLEAN CROOK A shoplifter ripped of a Broadway drugstore to the tune of more than $3,400 worth of toiletries and makeup on Nov. 12. A manager told police that he became suspicious after noticing a few empty shelves at the store between Murray St. and Park Pl. on Nov. 14. After reviewing the pharmacy’s surveillance feed, he spotted the thief — on two separate occasions — stuffi ng a small fortune in shampoo, lotions, body spray, shaving cream, deodorant, aging creaming, musk, and other toiletries into two bags and flee. — Colin Mixson DowntownExpress.com

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ALTERNATE SIDE PARKING RULES ARE IN EFFECT ALL WEEK Maybe itâ€™s Trump-lock in Midtown, maybe itâ€™s the new Nike store, maybe itâ€™s because so many people think Soho is so hot... Whatever the reason the crowds in Soho, especially along Broadway, Canal St. to Houston St. and north, look more like Fifth Avenue by Rockefeller Center around tree-lighting time! I had an office at Broadway and Houston for 17 years and overlooked both streets to the south and east. I have never, ever seen crowds like this. Lower Manhattanites may want to consider the much quieter, less crowded World Trade Center shopping area in the Oculus. Until itâ€™s discovered, itâ€™s the easiest place to shop. Be warned, the Rockefeller Center treelighting ceremony was on Wednesday, and that means crowds will flock to see it from Turnsday night on. Expect crowding on B, D, F, and M trains headed uptown to Rockefeller Plaza. Monday night football returns to the Meadowlands this week with an 8:30 p.m. Jets-Colts battle at MetLife Stadium. Yes, I know the Jets are hapless and the Colts so-so but we can still expect 40,000â€“50,000 people or more flooding into MetLife Stadium. Football

HATE CRIMES Continued from page 10

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for reporting is very real,â€? she said. Pezzella suggested that the NYPD reach out and let people know they want to hear their stories, and said that assigning openly LGBTQ or foreignborn officers to neighborhoods where those populations are experiencing issues could encourage people to report crimes. The UK did that with LGBTQ officers and had success, he said. Chestnut noted that witnesses to hate crimes can help by refusing to remain silent, and asked people to sign AVPâ€™s â€œbystander pledgeâ€? to act if they witness an act of hateful violence. The pledge, promoted with the hashtag #IWILLNOTSTANDBY, includes advice on safely intervening to halt a bias attack. The man who targeted Hoylman may have been three thousand miles away, but the state senator believes that people who want to change the nationâ€™s toxic political climate for the better should start in their neighborhoods.

fans headed that way will encounter a rush-hour traffic surge through the Holland Tunnel beginning around 6 p.m. That means delays along Canal, Varick and Broome Sts. If youâ€™re going to the game, do yourself â€” and evening commuters â€” a favor: take NJ Transit! The Hetrick-Martin Instituteâ€™s Emery Awards gala will bring more than 1,100 guests (and a few VIPs) to Cipriani on Wall St. between William and Hanover Sts. 6 p.m. on Wednesday. R trains will not stop at Whitehall St. in either direction from 11:30 p.m. Thursday to 5 a.m. Friday, and again from 11:30 p.m. Friday to 5 a.m. Monday. From the mailbag: Dear Transit Sam, I heard the city has an amnesty for tickets. Can you tell me how I go about getting my parking tickets through the amnesty program? HP, Riverdale Dear HP, Yes, the city has an amnesty program. However, no, it does not apply to parking tickets. Tickets that are eligible for amnesty are those that are returnable to the Environmental Control Board (ECB). For more info go to www.nyc. gov/forgivingfines. Transit Sam

â€œAs New Yorkers are frustrated by the national political climate, they should get involved â€” join the community board, go to precinct community [council] meetings, get involved with your block association, contribute money to your favorite advocacy group,â€? he said. â€œThereâ€™s the saying â€˜a crisis is a terrible thing to waste,â€™ and I think thereâ€™s a lot of work to be done to restore the feeling of safety and respect in our national political dialogue and I think starting locally is a good option.â€? Chestnut agreed with Holymanâ€™s advice to think nationally and act locally, saying that New York should be an example for the rest of the country. â€œIn New York City weâ€™re fortunate that thereâ€™s an organization for every reality that someone is facing,â€? she said. â€œAnd we as a country, ensuring that resources and support go to regions of the country that donâ€™t have as much wealth as we do and thinking of how can New York City lead that.â€? DowntownExpress.com

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phone conversations. The use of a hands-free device does not lower distraction levels. The percentage of vehicle crashes and nearcrashes attributed to dialing is nearly identical to the number associated with talking or listening.

Daydreaming Many people will admit to daydreaming behind the wheel or looking at a person or object outside of the car for too long. Per-

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a rest area and spend 10 minutes snacking there before resuming the trip.

Reading Glancing at an advertisement, updating a Facebook status or reading a book are all activities that should be avoided when driving. Even pouring over a traffic map or consulting the digital display of a GPS system can be distracting.

December 01 -14, 2016

E D ITO R IAL

Tis the season for ‘dangerous toy’ warnings PUBLISHER

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BY LENORE SKENAZY Sick of being warned about anything and everything when it comes to the holiday season, especially all the warnings about dangerous toys? Me too. That’s why I’m ready to throw a lawn dart at a group called “World Against Toys Causing Harm” — W.A.T.C.H. Every year since 1973 it has published a hyperventilating “10 Most Dangerous toys” list at Christmastime. Now maybe back in ’73, toymakers were still grinding out toy ovens that could smelt ore, and chemistry sets that could actually blow things (that is, people) up. But in the 40-plus years since W.A.T.C.H. was started — by a trial lawyer who wouldn’t exactly suffer if he drummed up clients eager to sue toymakers for negligence — the regulations on toys and other kiddie products have multiplied to the point where if there’s lead in the ink in the logo that’s printed on the instep of a child’s boot, the item is recalled. Because what if a kid somehow hacked the boot into pieces, peeled out the instep and ate it? And speaking of shoes, another run of children’s footwear was recalled because “The metal rivets surrounding the holes where the shoestring is secured on the shoes can have sharp edges, posing a laceration hazard.” So wrote the Consumer Product Safety Commission. What threat level are we talking about? “The firm has received one report of an adult who scratched or cut his finger,” the Commission wrote. “No medical attention was required.” A miracle! But it is just this zero tolerance for “risk” that W.A.T.C.H. exploits every Christmas. Among its Top 10 dangers this year is a large, plush elephant. What danger could a stuffed animal with no sharp edges, lead paint, or exploding

parts possibly present? Duh! “Potential for suffocation! Not to be used unsupervised.” Also on this year’s list is a kind of wearable beach ball called Bump ’n Bounce Body Bumpers. You put the bumper around your waist like an inner-tube and then proceed to bump into your friends. The manufacturers’ own warning label, already quaking at the thought of personal injury lawsuits, clearly states, “To avoid risk of serious injury or death … protective equipment (for head, elbows, knees, hands, etc) should be worn (not included).” But somehow, even a warning about death was not enough. The company was shamed because its box shows kids using the toy without any head, elbow or knee guards whatsoever. Goodbye, St. Nicholas, hello St. Pete! If they only worked a little harder, I’ll bet lawyers could stop kids from ever moving their fragile little bodies again. But so far, W.A.T.C.H. has shied away from the biggest kahuna of them all, the toy that must be stopped. So I did it for them. I ran a contest online: Come up with a warning label for a ball! Here’s what folks came up with (some using their whole names, some not). • Caution! Sharp edges. —Neil S. • Warning: This is a toy and not to be used as an actual ball. —Matthew Trescher • Warning: Ball carries germs. Wash after each use. —Alanna But wait! There’s more! • Do not insert into urethra. • For decorative purposes only. —Christina

• Not to be used as a flotation device. —Adam Kampia • Do not operate without protective goggles. —Shelly Stow • Device does not provide a stable support. Do not attempt to sit or stand upon the ball. —Scott • Toy may change direction unpredictably when impacting an object. —Jim C. • Chasing this object could cause fatigue. —John B. • For educational purposes only. Not to be taken internally. Do not play “ball” while driving. —Bob Magee • For recreational purposes only. Do not use as a metaphor for having a great time. Do not use as a metaphor for masculinity or courage. Do not confuse with a formal dance. —Kenny Felder • Not to be used to exclude other children. —Backroads • To avoid risk of serious injury or death, always wear groin protection. Do not roll or throw ball near a street, drain, sewer, or body of water without adult supervision. Do not throw ball while under the influence of drugs or alcohol. If you have high blood pressure or diabetes, consult your doctor before attempting to throw ball. —Rick • Warning, if you bounce this too high it might break through the ceiling causing the house to cave in on you. —Alaina, age 12 • To be used on padded surfaces only. Use of a helmet is recommended. If any hole or tear develops discard immediately. —Jessica • Not to be used by children under 13. —Sally • Do not throw. — Jack D. • Warning: Balls may be bigger than brains. —Lollipoplover Lenore Skenazy is a keynote speaker, author of the book and blog Free-Range Kids, and a contributor at Reason. com.

Posted To DOWN IN THE TRUMPS: DOWNTOWNERS FEELING ‘ANGER, SORROW, DISBELIEF’ (NOV. 9) Bernie Sanders voters screwed Hillary by not supporting her. bpca-scammers The Clintons have been screwing America, regular Democrats, and

Bernie Sanders supporters. Get Real This article is pathetically biased. There are a lot of people living in downtown Manhattan who were elated the morning after Trump’s election. This reporter wouldn’t have had to try to hard to find them were for it not

that the mainstream media has basically cast anyone who supports him as stupid and uneducated, thus making many of us afraid to share our viewpoints. This is far from the case. It will be interesting to see how all of you “open minded” liberals react when this country is in far better shape 4 POSTED Continued on page 17

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POSTED Continued from page 16

years from now. Open your minds. John Weyrens According to NYC preliminary election results, about a half million voters voted against Hillary Clinton (or “for” someone else). Just over 460,000 went for Trump. Put in perspective, NYC votes for Trump – in this anti-Trump/ pro-Hillary city – dwarf in size most cities and towns in the US. JD

SAIL AWAY: AS OFFSHORE SHOVES OFF, LOCALS SEE AN OPENING FOR POPULAR COMMODORE TO RETURN TO HOME PORT (NOV. 16) ABSOLUTELY — Bring back The Manhattan Sailing School! Luigi Children’s sailing programs!!! Fortenbaugh ran, and continues to run, the best programs in the city’s history. SC Manhattan Sailing School would be a great addition to North Cove Marina again. It has been sorely missed by sailors and landlubbers alike in North Cove over the last two years. The excitement and activity it generated in the marina reminded residents and visitors that North Cove was a valued part of our residential neighborhood. Bob Finkelstein Fortenbaugh runs the best sailing program in the NY harbor any way you look at it. Amount of boats, quality of teachers, number of different programs, etc. And there is that touch of magic that no other operations has. Fortenbaugh and his sailing operations belong to North Cove. Do the right thing and bring him back! Edouard A great organization. Bring back Manhattan Sailing School! Robert Local residents and I love the Manhattan sailing school — the best

and most friendly instructors — and everyone is just so wonderful. Bring them back. Laura Belle Had the option of taking lessons any number of places living downtown, but made the trip to Jersey City because everyone said Manhattan Sailing School was the best. It really should be back in North Cove. Just makes sense. People in Manhattan need easier access. Dr. Sonita Bring back MYC! It hasn’t been the same since they left! They are true professionals and make the marina a better place for the whole community! Sebastian MYC has been a great community program for many years out of North Cove Marina. I would love to see that contribution return to the area as it is the premier program in the country. However, Liberty Harbor is working out very well. And it is very affordable. So let’s all hope that Brookfield can be reasonable so MYC can be a viable program if it chooses to return to North Cove. Nemo The community and sailors from across the city would welcome the Manhattan Sailing School and Club back. Michael and his knowledgeable staff provided a much needed outlet for our children, which is difficult to replicate in an urban setting. Michael P. The Manhattan Sailing School’s great energy gave life to North Cove Marina, but this buzzing energy has clearly been missing from North Cove since they left. With their amazing staff and great programs, the Manhattan Sailing School returning to North Cove would revitalize the marina and have a positive affect on the surrounding community. Capt. Gus Dollinger North Cove is a shadow of what it was. It’s a sad tack-on to Brookfield Place, rather than a source of vitality, which is what it was. Having MYC and Manhattan Sailing School back

would be good for North Cove and for Brookfield Place. PGC What the he** is wrong with Brookfield? They seem intent on not wanting MYC at the North Cove Marina. Or, is it Cuomo who has it in for BPC. Either way, Cuomo is part of the problem. Jan David With the Trump victory, I was hoping he would rid us of the entire BPCA Board by taking them to the White House — a better match for the proven competencies of the BPCA Tom Goodkind Bring back Manhattan Sailing School to North Cove! Great programs for youth and adults with a commitment to the community. Christina Chang Would love to have Michael back and a vibrant marina but IGY operates the marina like a high-end strip mall… the rent will be sky high with lots of restrictions. TM Yes! Let’s get Manhattan Yacht Club back! Allan Beaufour As a Battery Park City resident, I know the choice was clear two years ago, and the choice is clear today — Michael Fortenbaugh has the judgement, creativity and experience to run the best marina outfit in NYC. Hands down. There is not a single resident of BPC who feels differently. Brookfield, please move forward on this immediately. Paul R Cheek Michael Fortenbaugh has proven that he can run a top ranked, large scale and affordable sailing program. Let’s bring him, his team and recreational sailing back to the Big Apple! Benoit Montin If offered a presence at Brookfield Place, Manhattan Sailing School’s lower Manhattan community-building strengths, across all age groups, would broaden Brookfield Place’s relevance as

a destination for local residents beyond the tourist/office worker crowd. It would seem like a win for all. PDT I will NOT join Manhattan Sailing because they sail 25-year-old J24 sailboats! I prefer to go to Brooklyn and sail the modern and fast Melges 24. What kind of sailors don’t want better boats? George Michael Fortenbaugh was running a not-for-profit scam with his various shell organizations. His marina work was shoddy and unsafe. Once you’ve seen the “sausage-making” that is the administration of his businesses — the greed, the exploitation, the water pollution, the racism and sexism — you realize why Brookfield would never want anything to do with this man, however skillfully (and disingenuously) he markets his brand as community-friendly and inclusive. He is a disgrace. Battery Parker I am Michael Fortenbaugh and read these past two comments. It is a shame some people feel the need to disparage our organization which had a stellar record at North Cove. If you are going to slam someone in public but hide behind a fake name, you are cowardly and probably have confl icts of interest. There are people in life who create great things and others who just tear things down. For 20 years, Manhattan Sailing School operated from North Cove with great acclaim and support from the community. We created the first sailing club in Manhattan, the first junior sailing programs and the list of firsts goes on and on. BPCA, under a different administration, also put me in charge of North Cove to restore the marina after 9/11. We made it such a big success that Brookfield wanted to take it over. I am very happy and proud with what we accomplished over 20 years. Now we are doing the same in our new community in Jersey City. Since we left North Cove, the sailing opportunities for everyone have dropped significantly and we would be happy to help restore them at some point in the future. Michael Fortenbaugh

SOU N D O F F!

W WRRITE ITE AA LETTE LETTERR TO TO TH THEE EEDDITO ITOR! R! EEDDITO ITOR@ R@DDOOW WNTO NTOW WN NEX EXPPRRES ESSS.C .COOM M DowntownExpress.com

December 01 -14, 2016

LATE FEES Continued from page 1

BUS DELAYS Continued from page 1

called and got a case number, but it wasn’t improving,” Vasseur said. “I think there’s a disconnect. In my opinion, there didn’t seem to be a sense of urgency about all these parents waiting for buses for weeks to get it right.” If the driver gets lost on the way to school, parents usually only find out how late the bus was from their kids. On Sept. 27, for instance, Vasseur waited 40 minutes for the bus to arrive for pickups in Battery Park City, but then the substitute driver got hopelessly lost in an odyssey that took the Downtown youngsters as far north as W. 46th Street, before arriving at Peck Slip School more than an hour and a half late, when there were no adults outside to greet them. And the parents would have been none the wiser if Vasseur’s kid hadn’t mentioned seeing the Intrepid aircraft carrier on his way to school — an odd site for student heading crosstown from Battery Park City. “We wouldn’t have known,” said Vasseur. “This time I was like, ‘Wow, this is a problem.’” Now parents live in constant fear that their kids’ next ride to school will be with a substitute driver, and if the driver gets lost, they won’t have a clue, according to one Battery Park City mom. “This is the nightmare that I am dread-

Associated Press / Seth Perlman

Downtown parents complain that substitute school bus drivers regularly get lost for hours in Lower Manhattan’s labyrinthine streets, and the city ignores the problem.

ing,” said Galit Bartleson, whose 8-year-old daughter uses the route. “A school bus driver needs to know their route — that’s all they need to know — and if the bus doesn’t arrive, there’s no checks and balances.” Parents along the route have done their best to take matters into their owns hands, circulating a contact list with numbers for moms, dads, and the route’s current bus driver in an effort to make sure everyone stays abreast of any delays that occur, according to Wikeldo. “We feel like we have to be on top of it and communicate with each other in order for us to have an efficient way to get our kids to school on time,” the Battery Park City mom said.

on a tight budget, keeps meticulous logs of both when her checks are sent and when they’re deposited, she said. She was charged a late fee last month on a check she claims she sent on Oct. 1 along with a stack of other checks for various bills, all of which were deposited on either the fifth, sixth, or seventh of the month — except her rent check, which wasn’t deposited until Oct. 12, she explained. “We’re two seniors and we have very little money, so I keep a really, really tight ship as far as money goes,” Chambers said. “If the other checks didn’t go much further, but got there on the fifth, sixth, and seventh, why wouldn’t this one?” Gateway uses a lockbox service contracted through KLIK that receives and deposits rent checks on behalf of management, according to Shaughnessy. Tenants mail their rent checks to a post office box managed by KLIK, not Gateway’s management office, thus precluding any shenanigans on the landlord’s part, such as mishandling the

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checks or intentionally withholding them, she said. Shaughnessy admitted that the contractor does not keep a log of when the checks are actually received, but contends that it deposits checks either the day they’re received, or the day after. Despite the involvement of an accredited third-party check handler, the sheer volume of complaints the lawyers have received from aggrieved Gateway tenants shows that management is up to no good, according to Perry. “The problem is how many people have so many problems,” Perry said. “You’re allowed to trust a third party contractor, until you have enough reasons to know you can’t trust them.” The Gateway Plaza Tenants Association has also received complaints from tenants about bogus late fees, but is less willing to jump to the conclusion of wrongdoing, according to the group’s president. “We’re aware of some complaints that have come our way and we’re assessing it,” said association president Glenn Plaskin.

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Stop Shopping and Start Gathering Reverend Billy’s new show inspires ‘activists to their actions’ BY SCOTT STIFFLER Marching as to war armed only with wit, a white suit and collar, and Elvismeets-evangelist hair that’s every bit as enigmatic as the dome-topper sported by our president-elect, Reverend Billy is a preacher whose dire warnings about the high cost of putting profit before people no longer requires the leap of faith it did in 1998. That’s when he made his bones in the NYC performance art and activism scenes, with a series of Times Square sidewalk sermons admonishing “the imperialism of dreams that is marketed so brutally by Disney.” Back then, even the most sympathetic set of ears did not always process the urgency of a plea to resist consumerism’s siren call. The ensuing two decades, however, give credence to this comedic, fauxcleric’s vision of an American landscape scarred by sweatshop labor, corporatecreated toxins, species extinction, chain store domination, and an increasingly militarized police force. Vowed Reverend Billy of the coming year, “Our politics is of us, ceding from Trumpland. Religion, the industrial universities, the large institutions, they are not creating safety. They are not creating prosperity. They are not inviting involvement. We’ve been conned out of feeling we have power. And so, we’re feeling a return to the local, to what’s happening in our neighborhoods. We’re ‘magicalizing’ the things in the foreground: What’s up and down my street? What’s in my essential reach? Who can I talk to?” With the list of things that cry out for our attention longer than the list of toys a particularly greedy child has already mailed to Santa, a Sunday afternoon spent communing with the clapping, singing, swaying, satin-robed Stop Shopping Choir is a surefire way to charge your eco-friendly batteries and double down on your own resolve. “We inspire activists to their actions,” the right righteous Reverend assured, citing “Gather” (his current stage show) as a happening whose music and mood will “whip the audience to a froth. Then, we will all go out from Joe’s Pub and we will DowntownExpress.com

Photo by Andy Blue

No stone tablets, just tree trunks: Reverend Billy compels us to bend to our better nature; or, barring that, just nature.

do that thing that is necessary to make change.” Having just returned from North Dakota, where the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe is protesting the Dakota Access Pipeline, the Nov. 27 performance of “Gather” saw Reverend Billy delivering a message “devoted to the plight of New York City’s hundreds of thousands of undocumented immigrants.” Stop Shopping Choir bass section member Ravi Ragbir, who works on behalf of the New Sanctuary Coalition of NYC, led the event. The theme of Dec. 11’s show will be “Neighborhoods Vs. Gentrification.” On Dec. 18, the run goes out with a bang, via their “Great Winter Solstice Bash.” Like past Church pilgrimages to Appalachia, Iceland, and the Redwoods of the Northwest, spending time at Standing Rock “changed us,” said Reverend Billy, whose Dec. 4 sermon

Photo by Sophie Molins

Rev. Billy and the Church of Stop Shopping Choir aren’t afraid to get their hands dirty, having returned from a visit to Standing Rock — where efforts to stop the Dakota Access Pipeline are ongoing.

will focus on how “the transformation at Standing Rock — where it is impossible to make a distinction between prayer and protest, between singing and seiz-

ing sacred land — needs to be carried to many towns and cities. Living inside their principles for a few days, then flying back from North Dakota, we feel the show isn’t so separate from our life. We must press up against militarized and consumerized citizens at all points.” To that end, Reverend Billy deploys his Choir like a Greek chorus that’s as nimble and theatrical on the picket line or the bank lobby as they are within the limited confines of a Downtown cabaret stage. “Yes, we’re a bunch of radicals who sing songs and we go to jail a lot,” Reverend Billy said, “but it’s also true that we have some great artists in our midst.” Their ever-changing roster ranges from 35-40 musicians/singers at any given performance, and currently includes Broadway’s Amber Gray (“Natasha, Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812”) and soloist Gina Figueroa, winner of the 2016 Best R&B Song Grammy for co-writing “Really Love” with D’Angelo. “She’s that mysterious Puerto Rican-inflected woman’s voice at the beginning of the song,” said Reverend Billy of Figueroa. “About half of the Choir,” Reverend Billy noted, “is of European ethnicity, and half [those of] many ethnicities. We have African American mothers in the Choir, who really took us to the issue of being safe on your own street,” and inspired one of the numbers you’ll hear in this current run. Written by the group’s longtime director, Savitri D., after Reverend Billy and Choir members went to Ferguson, Missouri in response to the 2014 police shooting of Michael Brown, the lyrics of “Get Home Safe” include: Working late on Thursday Trying to stay awake Parking lot is empty Get home safe Man down, brother down Man down, brother down Friday’s family dinner BILLY continued on p. 21 December 01 - 14, 2016

Just Do Art: BY SCOTT STIFFLER

30,000 items: pop, rock, jazz, blues, classical, and world music recordings; videos and DVDs; music books and magazines; picture discs; original vintage ’60s psychedelic posters from the Grande Ballroom in Detroit; and rare Fillmore East programs. Formats? They’ve got 78s, LPs, 45s, and CDs (new and out-of-print CDs start at $3; classical LPs start at $1!). Dec. 3–18, daily, 11am–6pm. At the ARChive of Contemporary Music ground floor office at 54 White St. (3 blocks south of Canal St., btw. Broadway & Church St.). Call 212-2266967 or visit arcmusic.org.

Courtesy Pen Parentis

Author Christine Rice, pictured, is a panelist and guest reader at the Dec. 13 Pen Parentis Literary Salon Holiday Author Mingle.

PEN PARENTIS LITERARY SALON HOLIDAY AUTHOR MINGLE Assure the kids that any bad behavior will be duly noted when Santa does a final pass on his “Naughty” list — then head to Lower Manhattan, with the confidence that your baby sitter won’t have to seek treatment for night terrors. An evening of no worries and the chance to have intelligent conversation with a roomful of other likeminded creative types: That’s the promise of a Pen Parentis Salon, where inspiration to keep (or start) writing comes in the form of shop talk and readings from successful authors, who also excel at meeting the sort of ongoing deadlines associated with raising children. Before those readings and a panel discussion, sip wine and schmooze, as you enjoy music from award-winning jazz guitarist Wilson Montuori. This month’s featured authors are Eleni Gage, Christine Rice, and Elizabeth Isadora Gold. Moms and pops may be the target audience, but everyone is welcome. The series returns on Jan. 10, with an annual Poetry Night featuring Stella Padnos-Shea, Matthew Thorburn, and Christina Cook. Free. Tues., Dec. 13, 7–9:30pm, at Andaz Wall Street (75 Wall St., entrance at Water St., second floor). Light refreshments and wine provided by the venue. RSVP to this 21+ event is encouraged, via penparentis.org.calendar.

December 01 - 14, 2016

Courtesy NYC Fire Museum

The NYC Fire Museum’s Dec. 4 Santa Rescue deploys a ladder truck to help a stuck St. Nick.

SANTA RESCUE SUNDAY AT THE NYC FIRE MUSEUM

How can a jolly old elf with the ability to circumnavigate the globe in one evening get stuck on the roof of the New York Fire Museum? There’s a good explanation for that, and an equally satisfactory solution to this unexpected predicament — when an FDNY ladder truck rescues Santa from his perch, then welcomes the him into the Museum, where kids can pose for photos and give their gift requests to The Man With All The Toys. Don’t put on the kids on your “Naughty” list if that Beach Boys reference flies right past them with the speed of a hypersonic sleigh; best to just let them enjoy the experience (further heightened by Christmas carols and other seasonal selections performed indoors by John Clacher’s Fire House Band). Sun., Dec. 4, 11:30am at the New York City Fire Museum (278 Spring St., btw. Hudson & Varick Sts.). The outdoor rescue is free; admission for the in-museum event is ($8 for adults, $5 for children. Reservations recommended: Visit nycfiremuseum.org or call 212-691-1303, x13.

year — when lovers of LPs, groovy givers of global music, and Secret Santas of all stripes can sleigh (okay, slay) their appointed tasks at this one-stop shopping opportunity. Day in and day out, the busy elves at the ARChive of Contemporary Music nonprofit library and research center labor to collect and preserve information on the popular music of all cultures and races throughout the world from 1950 to the present. Having amassed 3 million sound recordings so far, ARC’s noble Noah’s Arc mission inevitably wracks up duplicate copies from record companies and collectors — hence this holiday sale, one of two annual events where the general public has the run of the place. Up for grabs this December are over

HOTSY TOTSY BURLESQUE TRIBUTES THE “STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL” A long time ago, in a far-out, far, far away place known as the pop culture landscape of 1970s America, confidence gained from the phenomenal box office success of “Star Wars” got the best of its creator, George Lucas, who would almost immediately disavow the debacle that was the “Star Wars Holiday Special.” Long the stuff of VHS-only legend before the days of YouTube, the thoroughly bizarre Wookie-centric plot concerns efforts to properly celebrate “Life Day,” and includes a musical number from cantina owner Bea Arthur that’s actually pretty good, except for the part where it’s bookended by an interminably long scene that has very little purpose besides, perhaps, to fill time between cameos from Harrison

THE ARChive OF CONTEMPORARY MUSIC HOLIDAY RECORD & CD SALE Sure, the event listing you’re about to read ran in a recent issue — but this is one of those rare occasions when we don’t mind sounding like a broken record. That’s because it’s almost the most wonderful time of the

Courtesy ARChive of Contemporary Music

Secret Santas looking to score food for the soul, rejoice: ARChive of Contemporary Music’s holiday sale happens Dec. 3–18. DowntownExpress.com

Extra-Festive Holiday Edition Ford, Carrie Fisher, and Mark Hamill. To the rescue of this cultural curiosity comes Hotsy Totsy Burlesque, an ongoing series where skin meets satire, in the form of loving, libido-friendly tributes to everything from “Doctor Who” to “Harry Potter” (the first two months of 2017 will tackle The Muppets and the “Ladies of Disney,”

respectively). As for December’s show, hosts Cherry Pitz and Handsome Brad present performances from Bimini Cricket, Brief Sweat, Fem Appeal, GoGo Incognito, Le Grand Chaton, and Rosie Cheeks, and Dolly Dagger — names that put the seemingly clever monikers of “BB-8” and “C-3PO” to shame! Thurs., Dec. 8, 8pm at The Slipper Room (167 Orchard St., corner of Stanton St.). For tickets ($10), visit slipperroom.com. Artist info at hotsytotsyburlesque.com.

TREE LIGHTING AND HOLIDAY SINGS IN WASHINGTON SQUARE PARK

Photo by Ben Trivett

On Dec. 8, Cherry Pitz, pictured, and the Hotsty Totsy Burlesque crew make a Death Star run at the “Star Wars Holiday Special.”

BILLY continued from p. 19

Don’t be late Can’t keep your mama waiting Get home safe Saturday’s the wedding Girls dressed up Watching out the window Get home safe And even Sunday There’s no resting Even Sunday Get home safe Man down, brother down Man down, brother down “Our singing and my ‘preaching’ comes out of the heartbreak we all feel,” Reverend Billy said, in an interview conducted before his trip to Standing Rock, and while still reeling from the disapDowntownExpress.com

What good is having a song in your heart if you keep going in and out on the words? With free lyric books at the ready, The Washington Square Association has you covered, as you cover beloved Yuletide carols and Hanukkah songs while accompanied by the Rob Susman Brass Quartet — at this pair of annual events taking place at the base of the iconic Washington Square Park Arch. The stage was set on Mon., Nov. 28, when a 45-foot Christmas tree was delivered in the extremely early morning hours, then anchored to the Arch for the season (it shines bright daily, between 4pm and 1am). On Wed., Dec. 7 at 6pm, those sparkling lights get their first go-round, when Santa Claus distributes a copious amount

pointing election results. “It seems to me that a lot of us who have let ourselves drift into a sort of mushy liberal middle ground — we’re suddenly radical. Our distance from this right-wing government is profound. We’ve always been cheerleaders for direct action, but now we must console as we inspire. Sorrow and inspiration don’t always go together, but we have this to figure out with those who join us at Joe’s — because we must act against racism and violence against the Earth.” “Gather” is performed every Sunday through Dec. 18, 2pm, at Joe’s Pub (425 Lafayette St., btw. Astor Pl. & E. Fourth St.). Tickets are $15; $12 with the discount code HONEYBEE; children’s tickets, $8. Food and spirits served; no minimum purchase. Visit joespub. publictheater.org for reservations, or call 212-967-7555. Get info on Church of Stop Shopping activities at revbilly.com.

WEST VILLAGE CHORALE AUDIENCE OPEN MESSIAH SING

Photo by Ken Howard

You lend your voice, and the Rob Susman Brass Quartet will give the gift of music — at Dec. 7 & 24 events beneath the Washington Square Park Arch.

of candy canes, then leads the crowd in an illumination countdown. Brass Quartet and songbooks at the ready, you’ll croon familiar holiday tunes — then repeat that festive holiday ritual on Christmas Eve, when revelers will gather beneath the Arch at 5pm to see if they can get through their favorite song without the help of those handy songbooks. The Washington Square Park Arch is located at the foot of Fifth Ave., one block south of Eighth St. For info, call 212-252-3621 or visit washingtonsquarenyc.org.

A nonsectarian, independent chorus that’s been the voice of the people, for the people, and by the people since 1971, the West Village Chorale hosts concerts and community events from its base at that 1890 landmark, Judson Memorial Church. This month sees three of the Chorale’s most beloved annual happenings, starting with a Dec. 4 audience sing of Handel’s “Messiah.” Scores are provided, as is piano accompaniment and intermission refreshments. Come lend your voice to fill the atmospheric sanctuary as The Chorale’s new music director, Dr. Colin Britt, conducts. David Ralph, on piano, serves as the baroque “orchestra.” Other upcoming Chorale events: Dec. 11’s holiday concert and Dec. 17’s Village Caroling Walk. The Open Messiah Sing happens on Sun., Dec. 4, 4pm at Judson Memorial Church (55 Washington Square South at Thompson St.). $15 general admission, $10 students. Visit westvillagechorale.org.

THE NEW SOUND OF

BROOKLYN The Community News Group is proud to introduce BROOKLYN PAPER RADIO. Join Brooklyn Paper Editor-in-Chief Vince DiMiceli and the New York Daily News’ Gersh Kuntzman every Thursday at 4:45 for an hour of talk on topics Brooklynites hold dear. Each show will feature instudio guests and call-out segments, and can be listened to live or played anytime at your convenience.

WITH