Single! Young Christian Woman March 2010

single!

A P U B L I C AT I O N O F O N M Y O W N N O W M I N I S T R I E S

k MAR /

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Young Christian Woman

The virtue in showing up Brrrr- it’s chili!

Book review:

Shades of Blue

I bared my heart in Stonetown

The make-up efficiency expert:

Get your face on fast!

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TABLE 4 OF 6 CONTENTS

STRAIGHT TALK FROM THE PROVERBS

THE VIRTUE IN SHOWING UP

By Donna Lee Schillinger

MOVING OUT

FALLING OFF THE CHAIR

By Kimberly Miller

1O 12 16 18 2O 22

THE RECAP

SHADES OF BLUE

By Keiki Hendrix

SINGLE!

YOUNG CHRISTIAN WOMAN

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A publication of On My Own Ministries www.onmyownnow.com Editor in chief Donna Lee Schillinger

CENTER RING

I BARED MY HEART IN STONE TOWN

By Katlyn Stephens

REBA RAY’S DOWN HEALTHY COOKIN’ FOR ONE ON A BUDGET

BRRR - IT’S CHILI!

By Reba Ray

DEAR GABBY

Contributors Debra Collins Kimberly Miller Katlyn Stephens Tamara Jane Keiki Hendrix Art Director Daniela Bermúdez

NERVOUS IN NORFOLK

By Gabster

FASHION DIVINA

THE MAKE UP EFFICIENCY EXPERT:

GET YOUR FACE ON FASTER

By Tamara Jane

JUST WHAT YOU NEED

AN AWESOME SUMMER VACATION

By Donna Lee Schillinger

On My Own Now: Straight talk from the Proverbs for young Christian women who want to remain pure, debt-free and regret-free.

Now available at www.onmyownnow.com, at Amazon, B&N and a library near you.

Unconventionally conventional wisdom.

straight talk

the virtue in

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SHOWING UP One who is slack in her work is

by Donna Lee Schillinger

SISTER TO ONE WHO DESTROYS proverbs 18:9

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but I just couldn’t see perfection through to the end. If you feel pretty good about yourself, you might want to set the bar a little higher and challenge yourself to do more, better; the Ground Hog Day Experiment is a fun way to challenge yourself.

We just finished the 2nd Annual Ground Hog Day Experiment in which participants tried to live their perfect day. If you missed it, go now and join the Facebook group (Ground Hog Day Experiment); or if you’re not on Facebook, shoot me a blank e-mail with Ground Hog Day in the subject line and I’ll notify you when we gear up for Experiment #3.

The object of the experiment was to live your perfect day. Participants thoughtfully crafted a list of 10 things that, if all done in a day, would constitute their perfect day – not a fantasy day, but a day in which we behave like we know we should. The experiment is based on the Bill Murray movie “Ground Hog Day.” Next year, we’ll be giving out copies of the movie to participants in addition to great prizes, like Amazon.com gift certificates.

I’m happy to report that I nailed my perfect day – I did all 10 things on my list – but it took me 14 tries to get it right! I had several days that were honorable mentions,

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But don’t wait until next year to try to do your best. Why not try it tomorrow?

Start in the morning with making your bed the right way, you know, tucking the sheets in so tightly you could bounce a quarter off the bed. Now brush your teeth for two minutes using downward circles that massage the gums. Don’t forget to brush your tongue. Been a while since you flossed? If you want to do your best at cleaning your teeth, you have to floss. Apply the same diligence to showering, styling your hair, applying make-up and getting dressed (be sure your clothes aren’t wrinkled!).

Now for a healthy breakfast of two eggs, a piece of whole-wheat toast and half of a grapefruit; that’s the ticket. I know you’re in a hurry, but if you’re giving your best effort today, you’ll need to wash and put away the dishes you used. Leave the kitchen spotless! It’s off to work or school now to apply this same diligent perfection to every task all day long – and today is just the first day of the rest of your life!

I entered the Peace Corps with a group of 75 carefully screened volunteers – all ready to take on a two-year commitment, come hell or high water. Fewer than

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I enrolled in a sign language class. Eleven people started the class, three finished and only one attended every class.

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Easily, I could give a hundred examples from my adult life of how showing up and finishing are exceptional. Here are two that randomly come to mind:

How does showing up and finishing apply to a relationship with our Father God? Each day, we need to show up for some one-on-one time with God. Set a time for coffee, tea or even some burning incense (God likes Frankincense) and soft music (chanting monks will work). Let’s speak to God daily and let God speak to us through the Word and other Godinspired materials. The finishing part depends on what we’ve started. If we started to read the Bible through, finish that. If we’ve committed to singing in an Easter choir program, finish that. If we give a tenth of our income to God, as we’re instructed to in His word, see that through to the end. The final finish in our relationships may be a long way off, so we must concentrate on showing up to listen and to share of ourselves while finishing all the smaller commitments we make within the relationship. God will reward us with rich blessings and constant care.

It is so worth the effort.

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Showing up and finishing are still a long way from our best effort, but if we haven’t got these two down, which most people haven’t, this is where we need to start. Once we see the results we get from this basic commitment, we’ll be inspired to take our performance to a higher level, like showing up on time, well-prepared and injecting creativity into our endeavors.

If we will show up and stick with each project we undertake until it’s done, we will soon find higher levels of privilege available to us – promotions, raises, honor societies and in relationships, greater trust and intimacy.

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Though there aren’t enough hours in a day to do our best at everything all the time, there are two things that are quite doable and hold the secret to success.

1. Show up. 2. Finish. So simple, and yet, no joke. If we will commit to 1. Being present and 2. Completing what we start, we will stand head-and-shoulders above coworkers and peers and rise quickly to the head of our class, department, and division, and our relationships will flourish.

Perhaps you think consistence in showing up and finishing is not as important as it was in the olden days. Possibly true for the culture at large; however, for bosses and teachers, commitment remains as important as ever. The more rare committed individuals become, the more impressive they will be to people in positions of authority. I would prefer to hire a highly reliable person over a highly talented person any day of the week. Finding both in the same person is like winning the lottery!

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Perfectionism can be a path to insanity, but that doesn’t mean we should ditch it completely. What’s needed is moderation. If we desire in our hearts to do our best at everything we do, we will give our available energy to each task. When our resources are exhausted, it’s time to let the rest go. Practically speaking, this might mean we can’t ever seem to keep our nails perfectly manicured. Or maybe alien life forms start to incubate in our shower before we get around to cleaning it. Maybe we throw our clothes in the dryer for five minutes to get the wrinkles out instead of ironing with starch. Maybe we skip a shower on Saturday! We need to cut ourselves some slack on things of little consequence, but when it comes to our relationships, especially with God, our work and studies, we should pursue perfection with abandon.

35 volunteers finished the two-year term to which we were all so committed at first.

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I’m exhausted just joking about doing our best in everything we do. Life goes at a pace such that it seems an impossibility to fully apply ourselves to the hundreds of tasks a day that present themselves, not to mention each personal interaction. The quest for perfection can easily morph into anal-retentive behavior – textbook neurosis for caring more about the details than the big picture.

HOLD THIS THOUGHT:

I’m doing my best to do my best.

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w moving out ... settling in Have

you ever seen this object lesson demonstrated? One person stands on a chair, and another person stands on the floor right next to the chair. Then the two join hands and start to tug. The person in the chair tries to pull the other up. The person on the floor tries to pull the other down. The lesson? It is much easier to pull a person down than it is to pull someone up. When I went away to college, I wanted to be the person in the chair, pulling up my friends. I wanted to be, but I found that maybe I wasn’t strong enough.

(Maybe hardly anyone is.) It isn’t like I hadn’t been warned though. I knew this object lesson; I knew the scriptures and my spiritual gifts; I thought I knew my weaknesses. I was a good girl. My parents and I were close. I trusted their guidance and wisdom. I was strong in my faith, sure of my convictions and trusting in God. What I underestimated was how easily a person falls off of a chair, and how hard it is to get back up.

I wasn’t popular in high school and didn’t date much. Sure, some boys liked me, but I was teased and ridiculed to the point that I had very little confidence that anyone would ever fall in love with me. In college, I wanted to prove the bullies wrong. I wanted to show them that yes, I am likeable, boys do like me, I am pretty enough and

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smart enough and funny enough and sweet enough. I just wanted everyone to know that I was enough!

I spent so much energy on impressing people by being enough that I forgot to be altogether virtuous or honest with myself.

I let my aspirations of popularity compromise my values.

I let my aspirations of popularity compromise my values. This is really hard for me to write about! Even though that was a long time ago, the feelings are still fresh. I still feel shame for my behavior. I let my drive for the approval of guys control me – instead of seeking God’s approval. How foolish!

If I had it to do over again, I would seek out girl friends and make them my priority. Boys are fine, and they can be great friends, but friendships with girls should be more important.

Even more important than gend e r ,

though, are friends who help keep you on the chair. I had (mostly male) friends that messed with my head. Their theological beliefs were vastly different than mine, and I just wanted to share salvation with them. Honestly, my intentions were good. But in my desperation for friends, I compromised some of my values. It isn’t like I became a totally different person (at least not overnight), but I did learn to fit in. Take note: well-behaved Christian girls generally don’t fit in. Although my friends influenced me, it wasn’t in any way their fault that I descended to a dark place of doubt

w and disbelief. It is completely my fault for letting it happen.

You can’t really compromise your values without first re-evaluating them and then deciding that some are less important than others, and that’s exactly what I did. My friends challenged my beliefs. Even though I tried to also challenge theirs, their questions made me re-evaluate mine. Somewhere along the way, the clear line between right and wrong was blurred for me.

We have been taught that behavior reflects beliefs, but I think it can sometimes go the other way.

Sometimes, we adjust our beliefs based on how we want to behave. See, it’s a backdoor strategy for Satan.

If we won’t walk in the front door of his

“church,” espousing ungodly beliefs, he’ll gladly let us in the back door where we can experience sinful behavior before we buy in. My behavior became questionable, and then I questioned my beliefs. Then my behavior became flat-out wrong, and my beliefs again followed suit.

This is not to say that we shouldn’t be humble and open-minded, because more than likely, at least one of our beliefs should be adjusted. But we must have a Biblically-based set of core values to which we hold firm:

• God exists.

• He created the whole world from scratch.

• God is perfect.

• The Bible is perfect.

• Jesus is the Son of God. • Heaven and hell are real. Judgment will happen someday.

• The only way to heaven is by believing in Jesus as the Son of God. • What we do on Earth matters.

• Our sin will feel awful later.

Falling Off

by Kimberly Miller

the Chair

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w moving out ... settling in Don’t ever question these! There will always be discussions and disagreements about doctrine and disputable matters – resist the temptation to get bogged down in those. Our core values, however, must be wrapped all around us every second of every day.

Questioning them can lead to an inescapable mental quagmire. I began to question my core values and it led me to a dark, dark place. I lost my assurance of the previous 18+ years. I wanted it all to be true… I think. Didn’t I? Without those core beliefs, nothing in life matters. Doubt led to desperation and a lowest point, which I remember vividly.

I was lying in bed at about four in the morning. My behavior of the previous day and months was something I’ll never recount. I had a final exam later that day, but I couldn’t sleep. I felt dirty because of my sin, but confused because I didn’t even know if sin was real, since maybe God wasn’t. I closed my eyes, feeling so much pain inside; and silently crying to the sky, I said, “God, I don’t know if You’re there, or if You can hear me, but if You are, please find me. Please find me and save me from this hell. Please, I can’t be lost anymore.”

Have you read the Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis? My prayer reflected the mindset of Puddleglum when he spoke to the Witch-Queen of Underland: “Suppose we

have only dreamed, or made up, all those things - trees and grass and sun and moon and stars and [God] himself... Suppose we have. Then all I can say is that, in that case, the made-up things seem a good deal more important than the real ones.”

If God was real, I didn’t want to wish He wasn’t anymore. Even if sin is theoretically fun, it’s so not worth it! But if He wasn’t real, then nothing would change and I was stuck in this hell either way.

My return to God was not immediate. It takes time for a lost little girl who has wondered from home to be led back again. And a broken heart takes time to heal, but God healed me in a way that only He can. We can’t find our own way home and we can’t heal ourselves. Only God can restore us!

If you’re lost, you can ask for help. In fact, it’s what God is waiting for. He wants you to cry out to Him. See how this works itself out in four different scenarios, one of which probably describes you, in Psalm 107. The amazing grace that saved a wretch like me can find you too. There is no amount of lost or darkness in which God can’t find you. Don’t try to prove me wrong, but do know that however lost you think you are, and no matter how dark and bleak are your thoughts, there is hope for even you. God can pull you back up on that chair.

If you’re lost, you can ask for help. In fact, it’s what God is waiting for. He wants you to cry out to Him.

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While you’re packing your bags, be sure to get ready to leave home spiritually too.

Moving away from home – to college or out on your own – is, in a way, like being a zoo animal on the loose. You’ve had a cage of your parent’s protection around you all your life and without it, the world is a great adventure seemingly without limitations. As exciting as this may seem, you’ve got to fill in the blanks with new boundaries. Decide on what your new boundaries will be long before you get to college. I don’t just mean physical boundaries with the opposite sex; there are emotional and lifestyle boundaries, too.

Here are some limitations to consider:

Here are some scenarios to think through. Figure them out now, because these questions will undoubtedly come up.

• How late is too late for guys to come over?

• What topics are too personal for you to talk about with a guy?

• How casually dressed will you allow yourself to be when boys come over?

• How often will they come over?

• Will your dorm room door remain open or closed?

• Can guys come into your room at all or should they meet you in common areas?

• If your dorm is co-ed, will you wear pajamas in the hallways?

• Are parties OK as long as you don’t drink?

It’s important to know how you want to respond in these situations and then don’t compromise your decisions. As for the answers to these questions, read the scriptures and seek the counsel of parents, your pastor and other young adults who made it through the college gauntlet unscathed.

• Will you live in a co-ed dorm?

• If a boy thinks you’re silly because you won’t let him into your room unless your roommate is there, is he really the kind of boy you want to be around?

• If your roommate refuses to kick her boyfriend out by a certain hour at night, do you want to keep this roommate?

• What if your roommate drinks?

• Will you drink socially, even if you don’t get drunk?

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the recap

Those who are pro-choice (better named parent’s choice as the child has no choice at all) would most likely not read this novel. Planned Parenthood supporters would ridicule it (the last act of vestige of someone without a defensible position). And those who have so lost their way that they herald abortion as a “woman’s reproductive right” would simply dismiss it, claiming it is for the unintelligent.

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the recap I am none of the above. I am a Christian and though the subject matter of this book, abortion, is quite hard to read sometimes, the focus is not about the abortion debate. It is about the infinite power of a loving God to heal, reconcile and forgive.

feel. I have no doubt that even those who support abortion have these feelings but deny them. Perhaps it is these feelings that drive their anger.

This is a book whose time has come. Few authors approach this topic – she might not have written it had God not prompted her, which is a miracle of God’s providence alone.

I recommend this book to men and women who would care to know the truth about the inevitable consequences of abortion and for those who have had an abortion as well, because it gives voice to their own thoughts and allows them to identify with the characters and prompts them to seek healing and forgiveness from the living, loving most high God. Shades of Blue by Karen Kingsbury. Zondervan paperback $14.99; 336 pp., ISBN-13: 978-0310266228

A young love that falls prey to a weak moment results in a decade of guilt, misery, sorrow and pain.

The story of Emma Landon and Brad Cutler is one of lives changed by an irrevocable decision.

Can Jesus, a loving God, bring healing after an abortion? Can we fall so deeply into sin that Jesus cannot reach us to forgive and heal? If we cannot bear to remember our pain, face it and confess it, can we live our lives as if it did not happen?

Many other reviews are posted with the storyline of this novel so I won’t include it in this review. It is better that I should discuss the importance of this novel for how it provides a true picture of how lives are changed.

Abortion is not something discussed at family gatherings or in other polite conversation. Often men and women live with the hurt, pain, shame and guilt without an outlet to release them, even to God. But God is ever-present, waiting, watching and wanting to forgive. “If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land” II Chronicles 7:14.

This story tells of the “mental conversations,” the “walking shame” and the “lifetime of self-judgment” that those who have shut down the life of their child at the altar of their own plans for the future truly

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center ring

by Katlyn Stephens

I Bared my Heart in Stonetown

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Our alarm went off at 4:45 a.m., Africa time, and we needed to catch a ferry. This is not a story of wild travels or harrowing escapes, or even the reminiscing of an enjoyable vacation. It is a story about a life-changing trip to Tanzania that I shared with a team of 15 diverse people who have one thing in common—a passion for serving God and loving others.

We were complete strangers to one another just 10 days earlier, but now we were sharing laughs, memories and food as we landed on an island off the east coast of Africa known as Zanzibar. We met through a mission program at Liberty University for high school students and have since been on a thrilling adventure involving learning bits of Swahili, experiencing the rollercoaster of African roads (I will never again complain about roads in the United States), and setting our hearts on seeing the Tanzanian people as God sees them.

Although Zanzibar is still a part of Tanzania, it has its own government, so we have to go through international checkin before walking through the white gates emblazoned with “Karibu Zanzibar.” We enter Stone Town, an old city with tall buildings, and it is teeming with people and cars. One of the first things we pass is the clear blue water of the In-

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dian Ocean and the clean sand that is home to numerous wooden motorboats, each creatively named. Heading towards our hotel, we must walk up a narrow alley, which people and cars share. We have become accustomed to Tanzanians selling their merchandise in stopped traffic, so I am not surprised when my team is bombarded with men walking up to us, selling CDs, sunglasses and t-shirts. I can only reply “hapana asante” and “sihi taji”

(“no thank you” and “I don’t need that”), but these men are relentless!

Our first day in Zanzibar is spent in leisure, recuperating from the past few days, building a church roof and loving on the village children in the inexorable heat of the Tanzanian mainland. We take a boat, christened “Jambo” to the tiny island of Changuu, or Prison Island. It is a perfectly

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center ring up for the buyer’s delight.

Decisions, decisions! Evidently, our team sticks out just a tad, because the men in charge of their stands are calling out and dragging us towards their food. In front of this fish market are canvases on the ground, laden with the beautiful, handmade jewelry of the Maasai.

I only have 1,000 shillings in my pocket (the equivalent of $US1), but it doesn’t hurt to look, right? sec l u d e d home to 180-yearold tortoises, free-roaming peacocks and a long boardwalk splattered with evidence of birds.

Zanzibar is so different from other places in Africa, but they all are so uniquely beautiful. God has created such a diverse world, and it would be hard not to see the handprints of God in all that I have seen so far on this journey.

Shortly before sundown, my team departs on our little boat, which tackles the Indian Ocean fabulously, creating a beautiful picture as we skid over waves. Dinner is a unique experience—an open-air market, down a dark alley, containing the most diverse food. There was the usual beef, chicken and fries, but also octopus (tentacles still attached), live, and fish heads lined

Shortly before sundown, my team departs on our little boat, which tackles the Indian Ocean fabulously, creating a beautiful picture as we skid over waves.

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The next morning, my team congregates on the roof of the hotel to discuss our plans for the day.

The view is breathtaking, with the ocean in the distance, just over the mottled buildings and artists below painting vibrant pictures to sell.

My team leader explains about the religion of Islam and how women are viewed in their society. Just like the images we see in the news from places like Iraq and Afghanistan, Muslim women here cover their entire bodies, their hair and sometimes their faces . I had once believed that women don such garments because they are forced to do so, but in the majority of cases, it is the woman’s choosing. If a woman was taken advantage of, the man is not blamed for his actions, but the woman is for appearing too seductive by showing her body. Women as young as 12 years old are thrown into jail for “causing a man to misplace his civility.” While in the comfort of their homes, women wear beautiful clothing, yet they practice extreme modestly whenever they go out. My heart breaks to hear of such control and legalism when I am so blessed to be set free of that bondage through the ultimate sacrifice Jesus Christ made for me— the greatest act of love for an undeserving people. The God whom I

However, the law cannot prohibit our most powerful spiritual resource, one that occurs in the heart and mind: prayer. serve is loving and He cares about every aspect of my life. He knows my future plans.

The island of Zanzibar is full of lost people who need Jesus. It is against the law to openly evangelize, hand out tracts, or hold “group revival” here. If caught, we would be thrown off of the island. However, the law cannot prohibit our most powerful spiritual resource, one that occurs in the heart and mind: prayer.

Nothing of significance can ever be accomplished apart from prayer.

So our plan is to walk through the streets of Stone Town and pray. We begin the afternoon by breaking into groups of four, with a man in each group, to go on a prayer walk.

We open in group prayer, but with our eyes open so that it appears like we are having a conversation.

Our group leader warns us before we go our separate ways that Satan will try everything in his power to distract us from praying—the last thing he wants is more believers in Jesus as a result of our simple prayers. It is empowering to know that Satan, the prince of this world, is scared of me and what I can do with the power of Christ giving me strength.

Without cameras or money, we walk through the streets, saying both silent prayers and voicing some to the one standing next to us. I

K Katlyn Stephens pray for the random people we pass, the rundown buildings, for anything that draws my attention. I see a group of children in what I determine to be a school, and I send up prayers to God that He would guard their hearts and that they would come to know Christ as their Savior.

It is difficult at first to focus on my prayers for the people of Zanzibar while appearing to converse with my friends. After awhile it gets easier, and I see so many people to pray for. I do not know anything about them: what struggles they are facing, if they believe in God, if they have personal relationships in need of repair. But I take comfort in the fact that God knows them, He has num-

We walk in no clear direction, but I know that God is guiding our steps the entire time. bered every hair on their heads and knows every thought in their hearts. Some people greet us as a friendly Tanzanian would, but we try not to enter into conversation so as to not become distracted.

How amazing would it be if some, even just one person, heard us praying aloud for them and noticed the difference in us!

We walk in no clear direction, but I know that God is guiding our steps the entire time. An hour and a half has gone by when it is time for us to head back to the hotel. The only problem is that we have not an inkling of where we are. We ask a female police officer for directions, then head

in the direction she points. After stopping one more time for help, the four of us gather together in a clearing to close in prayer, still not quite sure where we are. We set off again, turn the corner, and we are literally 30 seconds from our hotel, with only a minute to spare before we are supposed to regroup! We walked in a big circle, with God leading us where He wanted so that we could pray for the exact people that we came in contact with. An even more amazing thing is that all of the separate groups arrived back exactly on time—our leader was fully expecting to have to go on a search through Stone Town for at least one group.

This, my first prayer walk – in Zanzibar, no less – blew me away.

I became acutely aware of the power of God to hear every little whisper, every miniscule thought, whether pleasing to Him or not.

While I did not witness any immediate results, I know that certain seeds were planted on that day last July. Jesus said, “This is what the kingdom of God is like. A man scatters seed on the ground.

Night and day, whether he sleeps or gets up, the seed sprouts and grows, though he does not know how.” (Mark 4:26-27).

is a student at Liberty University, majoring in Children’s Ministries, with a minor in Intercultural Studies. She enjoys spending time with her family and friends, playing with kids and delving into a new novel. She is looking forward to the future that God has for her, and hopes to travel to see more of His creation around the world.

What are you doing this summer?

If a prayer walk in Zanzibar sounds like the awesome adventure you’ve been dreaming of, get hooked up now with a mission trip for this summer. The group leaders will show you how to raise support for your travel expenses. Thousands of broke college students will spend a couple of weeks in missions this summer – why not you too? Check out Just What You Need for a list of organizations that conduct mission trips.

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o Reba Ray´s down home healthy cookin’ for one on a budget

T’ain’t nothin’ better than a hot bowl of chili on a cold winter night. You sutheners are gettin’ warmer weather already, but fur the northerners, it’s still winter until March 21. So let’s have some healthy chili. If yur in the habit of buyin’ canned chili, it’s one you need to break. Chili idn’t hard to make and store-bought chili is just plain fatnin’. And personally, I don’t like the taste of store-bought turkey chili, the healthier variety.

If you’ve got a crock-pot, here’s a good way to use it. If you don’t, you can make this in a pot on the stove.

• ½ pound lean ground beef • Small onion • ½ bell pepper • Salt and pepper • 1 can pinto beans • 1 can kidney beans • ½ envelope yur favorite chili seasoning • Clove of garlic • 1 can tomato paste • 2 cups water

Chop yur onions and peppers to the size you like ‘em. What? You don’t like ‘em , well, just leave ‘em out then! Brown your ground beef in a skillet, cookin’ the veggies alongside, salt and pepper to taste. Drain off any excess grease. Set aside. In the pot yur gonna cook the chili in, empty both cans o’ beans – you might want to drain off some of that weird bean juice in the can, but you don’t have to.

If you do use the bean juice, cut the water down by half. Now add the meat, chili seasoning, garlic, tomato paste and water and stir it all up. Let it heat fur about 10 minutes then stir some more because that tomato paste is awfully globular when it’s cold.

Now put the lid on and simmer for half an hour.

Refrigerate leftovers and enjoy an even tastier chili the next day. This recipe makes about eight cups of chili, one servin’ bein’ about two cups. So you can have it for a couple of dinners and then use yur leftover chili to make a new favorite at Reba Ray’s house… the Scattered, Smothered, Covered Bake

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It’s Chili!

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by Reba Ray

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Scattered, Smothered, Covered Bake.

Here’s a healthy tribute to an old Waffle House favorite. Special thanks to the dashing Chef Jim-Bob for his expertise in tater-fryin’. This is a great way to use leftover chili (déjà vu all over again). If you want to make this for company, triple the recipe and put it in a pie pan instead of an au gratin dish.

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Shred the tater – skin on (you’ll never taste it and you’ll get all the benefits of the fiber and nutrients in the skin). In a small nonstick skillet, heat one teaspoon of the canola oil over medium heat then add the shredded tater. Salt and pepper to taste. Let ‘er cook until the edges brown, then lift the tater disk with a spatula while you quickly dump in another teaspoon of oil to yur skillet. Now flip the taters over and cook another five minutes.

Lightly spray the bottom of an au gratin dish with cooking spray. Sink the hash brown tater disk into the au gratin dish until it’s coverin’ the bottom and pushin’ up the sides to form a crust in the dish. Trim off excess edges with a sharp knife if you need to. Pop ‘er in the oven and bake for 15 minutes.

While this tater crust is crustin’, put the cold chili in a small pot and stir in the flour. Heat on medium until the chili thickens to about the consistency of oatmeal.

Pull the crust out of the oven and spoon in the chili, spreadin’ it around. Now sprinkle the shredded cheese all over. Pop ‘er back in the oven for 15-18 minutes more.

Remove and let ‘er cool for at least five minutes. Eat yur single serving right from the au gratin dish. If yur making the triplified version in a pie pan for company, let ‘er cool for 20 minutes. Why? Well, cuz you gotta cut the pie up and dish it out of the pan, so it needs more time to “gel.”

And we’re done!

• 1 medium tater, washed • 2 tsp. canola oil • Salt and pepper to taste • ¾ cup leftover chili • 1 tbsp. whole wheat flour • ¼ c. shredded cheddar cheese (or Jack or Colby Jack)

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Dear Gabby

by

ter

s Gab

dear gabby: My college has a winter dance every February. Before I went back to school, I thought I would borrow my mother's birthstone necklace with diamonds to wear with my dress. No, I didn't ask

her. She rarely wears it so I figured I'd bring it back in a couple

of weeks. But a week after I took it, apparently she discovered it was missing - right after the repairman came to fix our cable TV. I

didn't know it, but she filed a burglary report with the police and her

insurance company. By the time I heard about it, everything was

underway. I was so shocked that I said nothing. I don't know how to tell her the truth, so I still have her necklace. I know she would totally freak! Should I just let sleeping dogs lie?

- Nervous in Norfolk

Living a conundrum? Trying to make two wrongs a right?

Threw the baby out with the bath water?

Dear Gabby can help! Send your questions now to

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thegabster@onmyownnow.com

“ Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. ” John 8:32 Dear Nervous, You do have one gem of a problem, Nervous, sting a bit. There’s no way around it. Unfortubut unlike the missing necklace, this one isn’t nately, your parents have been put in a similar borrowed; it’s 100 percent yours. But take situation and will have to right an embarrassheart, because this problem is not insurmount- ing wrong as well. But it will be such a relief to able, and by looking at the above verse, I bet take the honorable road, even if it means you you know exactly what Gabby is going to tell have to backtrack a little to get to it. you. You know what they say about the nose on Nervous, what you did was wrong, but not unyour face… No, do not listen to Heidi Montag, forgivable. It seemed like just a tiny wrong at your nose is just fine. What I mean is the an- the time you considered it, I’m sure. And perswer is staring right at you! You need to ‘fess up haps you feel like a victim of circumstance beto your mother. Oh yes you do, and it is not too cause had Mom not noticed it missing, there late. Rouse that sleeping dog! would have been no harm/no foul. Take note C’mon, think about all the lies that go into for the future that festering sores often start by maintaining your mistake: you have to hide picking at tiny pimples. Just say no to picking that necklace FOREVER, you can never show at pimples! any pictures of yourself at the dance, no one who saw you wear it can acknowledge that they saw you in it. This is exhausting! It’s no sleeping dog – this dog is rabid! And he’s going to be after you for a long time to come – like every time you remember how the cable guy’s good name was dragged through the mud on suspicion of theft. You may have put his job at stake – in a recession, no less! He may have a family, a mortgage – all at peril. What about your parents being suspected of insurance fraud, and the unsolved crime in your city’s police records?

Gabby knows without a doubt that you already know the right thing to do and that you’re just putting off what needs to be done. Like ripping off a bandage, the confession part is going to

With Lent upon us, the idea of repentance – or turning back from the things that separate us from God – is right before you, Nervous. Embrace Lent. Let the air and the light into this festering sore, and you will undoubtedly find some healing relief. That’s the beauty about telling the truth. That’s the beauty of our Christian faith. Jesus tells us He is the Way and the Truth and the Light. Follow Him, knowing God has forgiven you completely, and eventually – freak out or not – your mother will too.

- Gabster

19

Fashion DIVinA

by Tamara Jane

20

Does your make-up routine take an inordinate amount of time? Do you have to get up half an hour earlier if you want to look glam, but then end up with bags under your eyes from insufficient sleep? Do you find yourself copping the “who cares!” attitude half the time and just leaving the house with a blank facial slate? And even worse, could it be that when you do spend time on your face, it really isn’t even benefitting you that much?

If any of this sounds familiar, maybe what you need are some power tips

on how to whittle down your daily face art to five minutes or less, so you can consistently look gorgeous.

First of all, the basis of any good look is going to be a healthy complexion.

Fortunately, you can work on this at night when things are not so rushed.

We’ll talk more in a future column about skin care, but for now, let’s just say this: Get the make-up off. Open your pores with a hot, moist wash cloth – oh, that feels good – just let it sit over your face for about 20 sec-

onds, then wash your face with mild soap or a cleanser. Spritz or swab on a toner, wait one minute, then generously apply a thick night cream.

If you have acne or problems with blemishes, use a night cream that’s targeted to treat that.

Now get a good night’s sleep.

Beep beep beep beep beep – Darn it!

6 a.m. already. OK, time to get ready.

Let’s say you’re the type that takes very little time to get ready. You throw on your clothes, which may

or may not match, drive with the windows down to dry your hair, and when you do wear make-up, you’ve got clots in your mascara and blush that looks like Native American war paint. Here’s a routine to fit your lifestyle: Instead of applying the whole shebang – foundation, concealer, blush, eye shadow, lip color, etc., simplify with just foundation, mascara and lip gloss.

Start your face day the way you ended it, with a quick wash to get off the oils your face generated overnight. Then add a moisturizer with SPF 15 or better. Apply foundation, even to your eyelids, and then mascara heavily on top lashes and lightly on the bottom to make your eyes the center of attention. The eyes are the best feature on the face, and mascara is a great way to dress them up. Roll on some lip gloss and off you go. You spent three minutes on your face and you’re a beut!

What’s that? You have a little more time? Let’s see if we can get the whole face painted, and keep it under five minutes. To do this, we’re going to need to be set up properly. It would really help if your brushes were organized, bristles up, in a cup, and your make-up were lain out in order of item used in a drawer. At very least, you should put what you need, and nothing else, into one cosmetic bag.

At the beginning of your routine, you can dump the goods on the counter and at the end, scoop it all back in the bag. Fishing for the right one among three or four different eye shadows or lip glosses is going to eat up precious seconds. OK, let’s do this thing.

Foundation

– one minute: Quickly smear liquid foundation all over your face with a damp cotton ball, cosmetic sponge or wet fingers. Don’t worry about it, slather it on. Now take a dry wash cloth and pat the foundation dry on your face.

This evens out the look and keeps your greasy fingers off of your face too. Mineral make-up user? Good for you. Brush it on, Sister, and be quick about it – you have 60 seconds.

Concealer

- 20 seconds: Dab your problem spots with a stick concealer. Go on to your eyes.

Eyeshadow

– 30 seconds: Don’t waste time trying to match your eye shadow to your clothes. Match it once and for all to your eyes and then when time is not of the essence, you can get creative with color to match your wardrobe. But for rushed mornings, go with your natural color match in two strokes: a dark color for the lid and a light color for the brow. Use the tips of cosmetic sponges to get onestroke coverage for each color. Here are some suggestions of good color matches for eyes: Green eyes: rich purples are best.

Blue eyes: grey (slate), purples, and lighter colors (except yellow, that’s a color best left to the skills of cat-walk professionals) Brown eyes: Lucky you! You can wear any color. Pick one that compliments your complexion and stick with it.

Eyeliner – 30 seconds: To keep

within this time frame, you need an eyeliner than rolls up, like lip balm does, rather than one you have to sharpen like a pencil. Now just line one thin stroke under your eyes – that’s all. Save the top lids for those special occasions and discard completely the habit of heavy lining.

Go to the next eye. Now repeat top only on the first eye, then the second eye.

Blush

– 40 seconds: Time to blend that concealer. I like to wait a few minutes before blending so the color has a chance to set over the blemish. If I blend right away, I find I take the color right off and need to apply several coats to get the same effect as waiting a minute or two between applying and blending. Now, from the top of the cheek bone in a downward motion, quickly brush on powder blush.

Finishing powder – 30

seconds: Using the same brush you have in hand (c’mon, make it snappy!) give yourself a quick dusting or patting down with a translucent finishing powder.

Lip gloss – 20 sec-

onds: Forget lining your lips and brushing paint on.

Save that for special occasions. If you want to get out the door on time, just roll on a quick splash of moist color. If your eyes have the full Monty (eye shadow, liner and mascara), pick a light, subtle color so that your face won’t be too busy. Fair skinned women and blondes should also stick with lighter shades.

That’s it! Less than five minutes and we’re out the door looking fine!

You know what though? You looked awesome right after you cleaned your face. The truth is that make-up nearly always improves your look, but without it, there is still the beautiful face that God created, your mother loves and is uniquely yours.

Mascara

– one minute: Quickly brush the top, then bottom lashes.

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JUST Wyou HAT NEED

by Donna Lee Schillinger

AN SUMMER VACATION

AWESOME

If reading Katlyn Stephens adventures in Tanzania has given you itchy feet but you think, “No way I could afford it,” think again. There are a lot of former trailblazers now past their traveling prime who would gladly contribute $100 to see a young person experience the thrill of international travel – IF, it’s for a God cause.

me to serve in Your name in a foreign country, I am willing to go. Make it so, Father! I ask for your Holy Spirit to control my choices right now to lead me to Your will for me in this matter. In the most awesome name in the universe, the only source of good and love, and the name of your son Jesus Christ, so be it!”

If you’ve got a burning desire to go on a mission adventure, but lack the pocketbook for it, how about stepping out on faith and trusting the Creator of the Universe, the owner of the cattle on a thousand hills, to provide for this need according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus? Well, how about it?

Keep that prayer thing going at each step of the application process. You can expect something like this: You find a trip that looks good, fits your schedule and your spiritual gifts and skills. (Working with children? Construction? A medical trip?) You express interest via an online form or e-mail. You hear back within a few days and receive a more detailed application, which you need to start on without delay. If you put it to the side, Satan will try to distract you so you keep it to the side. The organization will approve your application and then send you instructions on how to get your travel documents ready and fundraise for your trip.

Stop using your over-analyzing noggin and click through right now to one of these short-term mission finding organizations and start the application process today. If you don’t do it now, you probably won’t be able to get in on a trip this summer.

As soon as you click the link, close your eyes while the page loads and whisper a prayer something like this, “Heavenly Father, if it is Your will for

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Feel funny asking for money to go on an international trip? Get over it! That’s pride and if you give in to

it, you’ll be shorting three parties a huge blessing: yourself, the potential giver and the people you would have reached on the mission trip.

Wrap your mind around that reality and asking for money won’t seem so funny.

Have I put this to you boldly enough?

Well, just in case: You need to get on a plane and get your butt to work for the Lord. Now go! Oh, and send me a post card, will ya? (Donna Schillinger, PO Box 573, Clarksville, AR 72830) Short Term Missions.com Christian Volunteering.org, the Short Term Missions page Mission Finder.org OM International For our international readers: This link allows you to set your home location to Australia, Canada, New Zealand, South Africa, the UK or the US.