Uprising Spring 2023 Issue 15

ISSUE 15

Land Acknowledgement

Land Acknowledgement: Uprising would like to acknowledge the land on which we gather is the seized territory of the Ioway, Sauk, Meskwaki, Wahpeton and Sioux People. Indigenous lands weren’t ceded through efforts of “good faith” by the United States Government, rather they were stolen from Native and Indigenous Peoples through coercion and dishonesty.

Both the State of Iowa and the United States Government carried out acts of genocide, ethnic cleansing and forced removal as ways to acquire land. Despite centuries of theft and violence, this remains Indigenous land — it will always be Indigenous land.

Native and Indigenous People are not relics of the past. They continue to share their talents and gifts amidst a backdrop of ongoing colonialism. We celebrate you. #HonorNativeLand Sustainable Promise: Uprising promises to publish our magazine in the most sustainable manner possible.

We have switched our printing processes to a more environmentally friendly company using a recycled paper alternative. We also vow to use only secondhand or borrowed clothing for styling in our editorials.

We acknowledge that in order to ensure a future for Uprising Magazine and our Earth we must modify our processes as environmental issues increase in severity globally.

Lastly, we are committed to furthermore learning and growing as it relates to publishing our magazine in a sustainable manner.

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OPEN: MONDAY-SATURDAY 7AM - 6PM SUNDAY 7AM - 4PM

SIDECAR 2215 COLLEGE ST CEDAR FALLS 1710 WEST 1ST CEDAR FALLS 924 VIKING RD 129 CEDAR FALLS 21 WEST JEFFERSON ST WATERLOO 1850 WEST RIDGEWAY AVE WATERLOO

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CO-EDITORS IN CHIEF Ireland Frisch & Mia Rampton EDITORIAL DIRECTORS Kalleigh Kress & Ellie Steere EDITORIAL COMMITTEE Jakob Watson, Quincy Griffin, Tommy Doyle, Jude Beekman, Camille Malecek, Mia Balong, Olivia Jones, Patrick Markovich, Faith Nielsen

Mia Rampton

Ireland Frisch

PHOTOGRAPHERS Ty Williamson, Emily Eaves, Emma Deaton, Ellie Dove, Emma Deaton, Ivy Cleveland DESIGN DIRECTORS Ella Poppen & Maddie Naeve DESIGNERS Dylan Lundquist, Lanie Weber, Kaina Geetings, Jayne Levi, Laetyn Miller PUBLICATION DIRECTORS Maddie Kizer & Sierra Nemmers

Kalleigh Kress

Ellie Steere

WRITERS Jude Beekman, Jaye Haines, Sophie Hoffmeier, Lauren Logue, Patrick Markovich, Riley McCall, Lauren McGuill, Erin Murphy, Dani Sunseri, Archer Trip, Nate Voelker, Cassie Williams MARKETING DIRECTOR Lanie Weber MARKETING COMMITTEE Cali Rampton, Payton Weidner, Maddie Hendricks, Ellie Dove, Victoria Olson, Piper Pinion, Ellie Nava FINANCE DIRECTOR Leah Holub FEATURES DISCONNECT Grace Carlson, Devesh Desai

Ella Poppen

Maddie Naeve

THIRD EYE Stella Perlowski iSPY Sanye Hunt, Peyton Paulson, Ava Morreim, Helayna Julion RED HEADS Sophie Hoffmeier, Maddie Naeve, Riley McCall, Sierra Nemmers, Amber Schute, Lindsey Ingraham, Rachel Robinson, Abby Poortinga, Abby Brown LONG LIVE Catherine Lindley, Dani Sunseri, Elek Richmond

Maddie Kizer

Sierra Nemmers

SAY HI / LET’S CHAT! @uprisingmagazineuni @uprisingmagazineuni @uprisingmagazine @uprisingmag uprising-magazine@uni.edu jointheuprisingmagazine.com Lanie Weber 4

Leah Holub

Dear Readers, As this is our last semester at UNI, we have been doing a lot of thinking about the future and what our next chapters will entail. Originally we wanted to create a final issue that reflected our perspective of moving forward in our lives and careers. However, we came to the conclusion that not all of our readers could relate to this. We wanted to be able to capture one last time the uniqueness of our organization and its members. That is how we landed on… Perspective, as the theme for Issue 15.

Everyone has a lens in which they view the world. Each lens comes with its own set of biases and perceptions altering the way we make decisions and live our lives. In a society more connected than ever, perspective is a key element of life to explore.

Your individual perspective is ever-changing and develops throughout your human experience.

Perspective is what makes us differ from one another and can be used as a tool to drive change.

Join us, this issue, in exiting the mainstream by sharing and seeking out our diverse and unique perspectives.

Xoxo, Ireland Frisch She/Her/Hers Editor-in-Chief

Mia Rampton She/Her/Hers Editor-in-Chief

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9 Switching Lenses 10 Leaving Room for Perspective 12 THIRD EYE 18 Flipping the Script on Fashion 20 I Only Read Queer Books for a Year

22 The Rabbit 27 Mighty Microtrend 28 Redefining the Color Wheel 30 More Than Meets the Eye 32 DISCONNECT

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34 iSPY 42 Closet Poems 44 Percieving your Self Worth 47 The Houses We Live In 48 Confessions of a Tall Girl

50 LONG LIVE 52 Living Loudly 58 Untitled Poem 60 The Sun and the Moon 61 Two Sides of the Same Glass 62 Life of a Lucky Girl 64 Witches of the World

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WORDS ERIN MURPHY DESIGN LAETYN MILLER 9

L E AV E R O O M

FOR P E R S P E C T I V E The people and experiences we hold closest to us are first in line to shape our personal perspectives. We hold the individuals we consider to be our friends, family, or significant others at a high standard. We give them our time and effort and we expect that back. It all sounds so transactional on paper but this is how we form connections. We live, experience, and make choices, but what makes up how we see the world? What or who has the power to alter our point of view? The answer lies within the people you surround yourself with.

The loss of close friendships causes that stress to build up again and causes the loss of our initial emotional foundation (Mayo Clinic). Being hurt by those who are closest to you is like losing a part of who we are. It’s harrowing and difficult to grasp and yet we have all been through it in one way or another. As we grow and change, so do the people around us. Our colorful array of interests bleed into each other’s, developing new hobbies and passions. They open up our mind to the parts of us we have never even thought to explore.

Think back to the friends and individuals you spent the most time with through the stages of your life versus now. They probably left their mark on you whether that be in a positive or negative way. You develop new hobbies, meet new people through them, or even find that missing piece of yourself through just one person.

When we choose to be around our friends, we consistently expose ourselves to conversations and discovery that makes up who they are. Even just interacting with a brand new person as you go about your day can have a similar effect.

Close friends are proven to boost happiness, reduce stress, increase sense of belonging, improve self-confidence and self-worth, and even encourage you to change unhealthy lifestyles (Mayo Clinic). Friends change the way we interpret the world around us and the way we treat ourselves without us even being conscious of it.

WORDS JAYE HAINES DESIGN KAINA GEETINGS 10

Some of the most interesting ways that perspectives change is when we encounter those people we don’t expect. Have you ever experienced a day where you ran into a person on the street or even in the seat next to you where you immediately started striking up a conversation and even somehow had a connection?

Most of the time we never see these people again and yet we will remember them. Meaningful conversations are a big part of perspective taking and when they are had unexpectedly they feel as though the world pushed us to have them

It’s up to us to be open to a new way of seeing the world. These little interactions and long lasting friendships build the essence of who we are. As college students who have experienced a lot of change, especially in the past 4-5 years, we learned very quickly that people are the single most important part of our lives.

These relationships and interactions are never insignificant. They teach us new versions of the world and grant us new shoes to walk in. Our point of view is just a piece to a whole picture, the more we gain, the more we see. Gaining another piece is a choice.

Interacting with people is a choice. The people you surround yourself with is a choice.

For example, as much as you might like a job you have been working toward, your team at that job will make or break your experience there.

As much as you don’t want to go to that event, the person that sits next to you could end up becoming your new best friend.

As we experience and evolve, people we know become distant and people we thought we would never know become close to us. But nonetheless these groups or individuals mold us into the versions of ourselves we are right now. Life leaves space for growth and we should too by choosing to see from new perspectives.

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STYLIST CAMILLE MALECEK PHOTOGRAPHY EMMA DEATON DESIGN ELLA POPPEN 12

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This shoot features three sets of photographers and stylists to amplify each unique perspective of the creative process.

STYLIST JAKOB WATSON PHOTOGRAPHY ELLIE DOVE 14

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STYLIST QUINCY GRIFFIN PHOTOGRAPHY EMILY EAVES 16

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What are clothes? Well, the obvious answer is things we put on every day. Clothes, bags, and garments of any kind are forms of self-expression. For some people, clothes are not best found in places like stores or your sibling’s closet.

The point of fashion—in my opinion— is to push the boundaries of what we can wear, what we’re expected to wear, and maybe even what we should wear. A few innovative minds can look at something like a military bag and envision a jacket, or perhaps a towel from Walmart as a hoodie.

It’s all about your perspective.

WORDS PATRICK MARKOVICH DESIGN LAETYN MILLER 18

One creator that really spurred my interest in altered and reworked clothing is Julian Carter, a fashion influencer on TikTok and Instagram. Julian’s primary focus is on reworking clothing. Carter’s account focuses on upgrading your style by focusing on unconventional alterations to certain garments. Some of these alterations include adding a camo skirt to military cargo pants, covering every inch of a pair of skinny jeans in patches as an homage to punk fashion, and a reworked military parachute bag resized to fit a laptop.

Assemblage Studio is another example of a creator pushing the boundaries of what materials we can create garments from. All of Assemblage Studio’s pieces are one-of-a-kind and oftentimes custom-made commissions based on customer requests. Some of the unique pieces created from salvaged materials include: cargo pants made from a feed sack and military laundry bag, a variety of “chore coats” made from U.S. Army Wool blankets, or a carpenter jacket made from two different colored military duffle bags. Assemblage Studio balances the use of vintage fabrics with modern silhouettes proving their finger stays firmly on the pulse of current trends.

The last influencer I’ll discuss is named Myra Magdalen, who films most of her videos from her bathroom which is covered in computer keyboards hanging from the wall. A lot of Myra’s looks involve early to late 2000s fixtures that are similar to the ones affixed on her wall. One of her looks is inspired by her Littlest Pet Shop video game controller where she wears a tablet on her chest attached to the controller with different pictures of animals from the game on the tablet. A lot of her looks are similar to this wearing cell phones on her belt and shirt and wrists or attaching different rollie pollie plushies to her skirt. It’s people like Myra who inspire me because she proves that you can wear anything as long as you don’t give a shit what people think.

On top of that her outfits are not just weird objects thrown together, they are genuinely high-concept expressions of the self which, in my opinion, is the whole point of clothes.

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Before I knew I was queer, or even knew what the word meant, I had the Percy Jackson series in my hands. When the character Nico was outed as gay I remember being disgusted, and yet somehow,

I knew that moment was going to change my life.

It wasn’t until more than a decade later that I remember reading my first explicitly queer book: a book written by queer authors, about queer characters, and for queer readers.

...and I’m Never Going Back Now, for my readers, this is what I mean by “queer” books. I use the label queer as an umbrella term for the LGBTQIA+ community. There needs to also be the acknowledgement that this word has been used as a slur against my community in history, but more recently, there have been movements to reclaim this word. To me, using the word “queer” helps normalize and better label the LGBTQ+ community in a diverse and simple way.

It was my senior year of highschool and I had won the 20

jackpot of classes. I opted for, essentially, a “free reading” class where I read books and gave reports on them. As the classic gay trope goes, I remember sitting down with my English teacher after I finished the lesbian/dystopian version of King Arthur, and telling her how this was the first time I had ever read a book that had me written within the pages. Yes, I had to explain what being asexual means to my English teacher, but I saw myself! Therefore, Once and Future by A. R. Capetta (they/them) and Cory McCarthy (they/he), sits stacked on one of my many bookshelves.

After that moment, I just wanted more. Then in the summer of COVID-19, I found the book Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas (he/they). Despite all the amazing parts of this novel, on page two, the main character complains about his binder. Yes, you read that correctly. His chest binder, which honestly he shouldn’t have been running in. There I was yet again on the page. Me. Or someone, who despite many other identities, had something in common with me that I had never seen written out before. That scene was my realization of why representation matters. That perspective shift can apply to anyone. Seeing someone like us, acting like us, or even just having one identity like us, shows us that we are not alone.

When I read the young adult novel, Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender (they/he), I was introduced to the narrator of Felix Love, a Black, queer, transgender teen. While I only share the identities of being queer and transgender, Felix and I shared one other beautiful identity. We both were on a journey of finding out how important the label demiboy was to the both of us. Seeing my own journey of finding myself written down in the pages of this coming of age story, and experiencing it alongside a character, helped me learn so much about myself.

In this year of reading queer books, I started the very important journey of realizing how truly normal being queer is. As someone who (unfortunately) grew up in small-town Iowa, I never knew the joy being openly queer could bring.

Without reading these queer stories, queer characters, and queer authors, my journey of finding myself would be much more difficult.

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being queer is normal

That first moment of reading a queer book—and of course, dramatically looking out of a car window—I realized that there were shelves filled with other queer stories; that being queer is normal. Every other identity in the intersections of these stories are normal too!

The main reason that I’m never going back, is because this is one of my favorite ways I can support my community! And this goes for you readers out there too. For me, by purchasing these books, spreading recommendations, by being a queer reader, I get to bring exposure to these authors! This journey of mine prompted me to even start my own queer book club on the UNI campus. Here I can use the different perspectives of queer authors for activism and community. I have seen this beautiful club emerge where readers can share space with their identities on the page and with each other. Throughout reading queer books, learning my identity, and starting my own queer book club, I found a single truth: something “as small as reading” can be channeled into a project of love and community.

Finally, here’s a list of a few books I always recommend.

Books Mentioned:

- Once and Future by A.R Capetta and Cory McCarthy - Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas - Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender

Other Recommendations

- Hell Followed With Us by Andrew Joseph White - The Girl From the Sea by Molly Knox Ostertag

For more queer resources, check out @unilgbtq on Instagram or join us at Queer Book Club! Please contact the GSS space at lgbt@uni.edu!

So why am I never going back to reading anything but queer books? I was a freshman in college when I made the pact to seek out these queer books and get my hands on all of them. Of course, in the foolishness of being young, I thought that I could indeed, read “all” of the queer books.

Thankfully, the blessing of it all was that that goal is impossible!

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something ‘as small as reading’ can be channeled into a project of love and community

WORDS ARCHER TRIP DESIGN DYLAN LUNDQUIST 21

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PHOTOGRAPHY TY WILLIAMSON DESIGN MADDIE NAEVE 23

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THE

RABBIT the slimy drool drips onto my paws jaws seconds away from clamping down but I keep running my heart threatening to pump out of my chest. survival has embedded itself into my bones the forest floor begins to change grass morphing into sand as we run along the river bank.

I almost lose my footing paws threatening to fold under the pressure I force on them but I keep running. a lunge and a snap of jaws so close mere centimeters away we are both so tired exhaustion ripples through me but I keep running. another lunge this time teeth reaching out like gleaming knives a scream. a crack of bones. the rabbit is clutched between my teeth.

I can finally breathe. my children will eat tonight.

I walk back to my home muscles aching and eyes heavy so much I do not register the hot blood that drips onto my paws.

WORDS LAUREN MCGUILL DESIGN DYLAN LUNDQUIST 27

MIGHTY

MICR

Trends come and go—it’s an inevitable part of the fashion industry! Now more than ever, we’re seeing these trends come and go… a little too fast. Thanks to the rise of social media platforms like TikTok and Instagram, trend cycles have gone from the typical 10-15 year change to just a year, or even a month in some cases. This has allowed for fast fashion to thrive, and with fast fashion comes the birth of the microtrend.

First things first, what is a microtrend? Good On You defines microtrends as “trends [that] rise to popularity quicker and then leave the trend cycle faster.” With the rise of social media platforms, especially TikTok, more and more microtrends have come and gone, fueling the fast fashion industry. According to Forbes, SHEIN made nearly $16 billion in the first six months of 2022, and their growth will surely not stop there.

WORDS SOPHIE HOFFMEIER DESIGN KAINA GEETINGS 28

Fashion United noted that SHEIN “projected its gross merchandise value would grow to 80.6 billion dollars in 2025.” What does this mean for the future of fashion? If wetake a look at how quickly fast fashion progresses, it’s likely that it will continue to dominate the modern fashion

ROTRENDS sphere, possibly usurping high-end brands in terms of influence. For the past few years, fast fashion has been known to copy high-end designers, but they’ve been notorious for taking the credit for smaller designers as well. Small fashion companies could be in jeopardy if the fast fashion industry continues to rocket to the top, and high-end brands could lose out on profit, with consumers favoring cheap look-alikes over their pricier counterparts.

The influence of the microtrend has taken the Internet, mainly Gen Z, by storm. We’ve seen the re-emergence of past decades trends, most notably the Y2K aesthetic.

The mixing of these iconic trends with a modern lens leads to the branching of microtrends.

The speed of a microtrend cycle will, like today, allow for fast-fashion to continue producing cheap pieces with unethical labor.

On the other hand, the variety of these trends will produce more openings for subcultures and self-expression to thrive.

Again, it isn’t completely clear how the microtrend will affect the fashion industry, but we can make some predictions based on what we’ve seen so far. It’s up to us as consumers to buy into or boycott microtrends, but we cannot change the influence that the microtrend has already had.

Cargo attire, low-rise jeans, and graphic baby tees are just a few pieces of the Y2K microtrend sphere. These pieces have been combined with other staples of 80s and 90s fashion, like windbreakers and oversized items. Where is this blend between eras taking us?

Twenty years from now, we could be seeing future generations blending popular microtrends together into one large conglomerate, making the origin of the trend unrecognizable. Fast fashion will only perpetuate this, making pieces for popularity rather than longevity. The microtrend, already short-lived in the present, could become a micro-microtrend. Aesthetics will bcome increasingly niche, creating a large variety of fashion-based subcultures, which is not so surprising.

Think of the cultures we already have today: Barbiecore, balletcore, and of course, Y2K. With the fast-paced life of the microtrend, future generations may not have the ability to pinpoint key aesthetics and defining factors of an era.

It’s uncertain whether this will have an overall positive or negative impact, but there are some discernible pros and cons we can identify today.

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It is a myth that redheads are going extinct. Type into the Google search anything about redheads and you’re going to get a long list of how redheads feel a different kind of pain, what redheads can and can’t wear, why redheads need to become nocturnal and avoid the sun at all costs, and how they need an extra dose of anesthesia (yes, this one is true).

There tends to be a negative connotation around being a redhead for different reasons, but never enough to give me the urge to dye my hair to hide the “shame.” Well, unless you’re middle school me. She wished everyday that her mom would let her dye her hair brown. Thank you, Mom, for not letting me do that.

Here are a few turnaround moments:

This is a pretty common experience for redheads. We are constantly told to stay away from half of the color wheel and are strictly set under a couple of colors. A few fellow redheads have brought to my attention colors they have always stayed away from and feel they can’t wear because of their hair. The list includes: mustard yellow, REDS, maroon, and any pink. To just name a few.

“I really started embracing my hair toward the end of my senior year of high school into my freshman year of college.

I’m not sure if there was an exact point where I began to think differently about my hair. I do know that getting into fashion helped me dress to make my hair blend with my outfits…Having red hair, despite my own qualms with it, is an integral part of my self-expression.”

I need you to know this article is to not complain about having red hair or how other people’s opinion affects this. No matter who you are (redhead or not) there is a turnaround period in which you start to appreciate certain things about yourself. These moments should be recognized and celebrated, even if you don’t notice the change right away.

“I have always been so encouraged by hairstylists because almost every single one I have ever gone to has told me that I have beautiful hair and they questioned if it is all natural. The hairstylist I went to growing up even swore that she would never dye my hair because she couldn’t replicate that color with dye even though she had clients willing to pay her hundreds of dollars to try. I’ve grown used to standing out in a crowd because of my height, so standing out because of my red hair was really not difficult at all. One of the things that I have really grown in appreciation for is how my hair sparkles a little bit when it’s in the sun; it almost feels ethereal.”

WORDS SIERRA NEMMERS SOPHIE HOFFMEIER RILEY McCALL PHOTOGRAPHY EMMA DEATON DESIGN LANIE WEBER 30

“My moment was senior year of high school when I dyed my hair black. All of my previous hair insecurity disappeared and I wanted my hair back. I appreciated it when I didn’t have it.”

“I couldn’t tell you exactly when my moment was because one day I just stopped worrying about if my clothes matched my hair, and I started using filters that made it more vibrant rather than dulled it. It makes me sad to look back on all the times I criticized my natural hair because there were a lot.”

A few facts on why redheads are so cool: Less than 2% of the world’s population has red hair Red hair holds pigment tighter than other natural hair colors Redheads are more likely to be left handed Redheads aren’t adaptable to warm, humid climates Bees are more attracted to people with red hair Some people believe rubbing people’s red hair brings good luck (don’t touch people’s hair without permission) Redheads won’t go gray, their hair will simply fade lighter

Sources

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There’s no way to know if the colors that I see are the same as your colors. I could see the shade you call purple and call it by the same name, when in reality your purple is my green. We can’t comprehend what other people are seeing because all we know is what we see. Colors are just one of the many fascinating features of our eyes and brain working together in harmony.

Color is a curious topic, the way it can fluctuate from person to person is incredible. One person could see a color entirely different, such as if someone is colorblind. Most of us are fortunate to be able to see all colors (at least all colors that are possible for humans to see). But the greens and reds and blues that I register when I look around may be different than what you see. Maybe they’re muted, or much more vivid. Or maybe they’re a different color entirely, our shades switched around like we traded cards.

About 1 in 12 men are color blind, while about 1 in 200 women are color blind. Imagine having reds and greens in your life as similar shades. To many of us, that is hard to imagine, they seem so separate from each other. But for others, this could be how you already see the world. Even if we try to put ourselves in one another’s shoes, there is no way to put ourselves in one another’s eyes.

Aside from just seeing regular colors as normal, some people experience things like synesthesia in regards to color connecting to other senses. Synesthesia is a neurological condition where the activation of one

sense simultaneously triggers another sense. People can hear music that causes them to see colors at the same time, or taste something after a certain word is spoken or a certain color is viewed. Typically people are born with synesthesia, but it is possible to develop it later in life in extreme situations. Imagine suddenly being able to see an array of colors when listening to your favorite song, or smelling a candle and seeing the colors dance before you. While it may be unlikely, it is possible.

There are 91 million rods and 4.5 million cones in the human eye. Rods allow us to see in low light but are not sensitive to color. Cones are highly sensitive to color and help with focusing on the details of an object. When we consider problems with our eyes we think about vision being blurry, being nearsighted or farsighted, being colorblind. It is fair to give credit to our eyes since they obviously play a big role in our ability of sight, but we tend to neglect the importance of our brain in terms of vision. We have to be able to properly process images we receive in order to make any sense out of them. Vision is flipped as it enters our eyes, it projects into our eyes upside down.

It’s up to our brains to decipher the image and flip it correctly. Seeing the world upside down would be frustrating to say the least.

Our brain is to thank for turning things around. There are many aspects of vision and perception that we take for granted. Take the time to look around, appreciate what your eyes and brain do. They help create the world you see around you.

WORDS LAUREN LOGUE DESIGN ELLA POPPEN 33

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WORDS MULTIPLE AUTHORS DESIGN LAETYN MILLER 42

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When a person’s environment changes, their sense of self-worth might change, and sometimes it can be negative.

Examples of this include: • Leaving home • Going to college • Moving into a new home, apartment, or dorm • Moving cities • Joining an unfamiliar group • Core friends or family members exiting your life Negative feelings may come about from feeling inexperienced compared to others, being lonely (especially when it can be difficult during this time in our lives to make friends), and generally not being used to where you are. These things can negatively affect self-confidence because other people who already exist in those spaces appear to be “better equipped” to them than you. Know these feelings are valid! However, they’re not the truth.

First things first, someone else’s success is not your failure. Second, feelings of discomfort dissipate over time.

Although, that can be frustrating as one goes through the process of figuring out a new environment.

Sometimes, one’s sense of identity shifts, and that can also impact their sense of self-worth.

Some examples of this would include: • The aftermath of a traumatic event • Coming to terms with a gender or sexual identity you did not previously identify with

• Becoming isolated within or from a community one was previously associated with • Physical changes (appearance, size, style, abilities, etc.)

• A diagnosis

There are a few things I believe everyone should keep in mind: Everyone has their own self-worth journey. Building fulfilling habits can help you feel worthy, and you can keep those habits consistent even when your life changes.

When I first arrived at college, I was reasonably nervous and excited. I jumped right into joining organizations, acclimating myself within my classwork, and generally establishing roots within the university. What was not so reasonable? Within a month I jumped head-first into a codependent relationship with someone who didn’t respect my identity, and caused more stress than comfort. It was an incredibly overwhelming time. I could not for the life of me establish a routine of keeping my spaces tidy, physically and emotionally.

These habits might include: • Positive affirmations • Wearing clothing and accessories that make you feel confident • Daily challenges on productive apps, such as Duolingo • Keeping a wellness or gratitude journal • A simple workout routine, to make you feel stronger.

• A note: My advice for those new to working out—don’t do things that you don’t want to do! Experiment with various ways to work out and find what works for you. If you only do workouts that you dread, you’re going to be less motivated.

• Surround yourself with people who bring up your self worth. (Also, unfollow or block social media accounts which make you jealous or generally bad about yourself).

• Consider joining an organization or group that brings out your strengths!

I share this to say—it happens. I’ve learned and grown a lot from that point. I’m a completely different person, and I’ve grown to know my own self-worth and that I am a capable human being.

For myself, my sense of identity shifted as I came to terms with being a part of the LGBT+ community, while continuing within my Christian faith. It took a long time for me to figure out how to hold those identities together inside of me, especially because I don’t know many other people going through a similar “identity crisis.” My sense of self-worth was impacted as a queer individual in particular because I often feel like the ways that I express myself are not as acceptable as the ways that most “straight” people express themselves.

No matter what changes may occur in your life, or how anyone makes you feel you're gonna find your way.

WORDS JUDE BEEKMAN DESIGN MADDIE NAEVE 45

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Today I spilled my coffee; seemingly small and mundane. Something that happens to everyone, but there are still remnants of a little girl living inside of me who doesn’t want to disappoint anyone, especially over spilled milk.

Our own perception can hurt us and make us grow in ways that our past selves could even write up in their dreams about the future.

Growth and pain are one in the same— one not existing without the other. No amount of weed-picking will rid the previous version of ourselves, even if we have all the tools in the shed.

We base our worth on needle in the haystack comments, hoping the pain goes away just a little bit quicker this time. We will sit in our rooms as the sun goes down and wonder if people love us as much as we love them.

We ache for what is to come—hoping, hoping, hoping. Then we mourn the time we feel we have lost.

But regardless of our tools, people will weed themselves out of our life. There will be a warm breeze that floats through the open window of your room and everything will be right even if the moment feels wrong.

There may be a coffee stain on one of my favorite dresses now, but it was already brown, so what is the stain doing except adding to the pattern? We can dilute our senses down and only see the negative side of things; and hey—sometimes that is completely warranted. Nothing is perfect but everything is loveable.

There is a hope that someone believes this life to be beautiful. I think of all the people who find solace in these moments; the moments I tend to demonize.

There are two sides to a story and by some stroke of luck we get to write our own.

I write this to remind you to sit down and feel it. Everything that you can. Because even if there is a hole in the ceiling, at least you can see the stars.

WORDS SIERRA NEMMERS DESIGN ELLA POPPEN 47

I remember the moment I learned Netflix made a movie about a tall girl because the second my brain fully comprehended what I was hearing, an overpowering hope brightened my soul at the idea of being seen and understood in a way that could fill up my heart so completely. My imagination blossomed and illustrated scenes after scenes that probably weren’t going to be in the movie but might be, all the time so blissfully unaware of the embarrassment that would wash over me when I finally watched the trailer. I haven’t even bothered to watch that movie because I’m so embarrassed by it, and the reasons for my embarrassment generally boil down to this: the film presents being 6’1½ as a crippling disability, its production was likely a poorly

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executed money grab, and people find a great, bonding joy in loving to hate it. I was ashamed that I thought the movie could have been something wonderful, that I had been looking forward to its release so deeply, but eventually I learned how to love hating it just like everyone else. What I didn’t realize at the time was that the part of me gleefully joining in the mockery was just veiling a complicated sense of mourning. This whole situation surrounded a low-budget movie that really didn’t have more meaning than what lied on the surface, but I couldn’t help but feel like the voices mocking the film within an inch of its life would do the exact same thing to me if I made any complaint about being tall. Being a tall girl is nothing like what that movie at-

but I would be lying if I said I’ve never looked at the part of me that fits in the mirror and wondered if I would feel just a bit more confident in myself if I was just a bit shorter. Being a foot taller than the average height for women is an agent of change. My life is not a tragedy, my life is not a sob story revolving around a physical feature that society hasn’t quite told me if I should love or hate, but at the same time, I’ve never seen Netflix write a show about girls my height without turning it into a giant joke.

I’ve only ever had one person take the liberty to ask me how my basketball season was going before asking me anything else, but I’ve had more people stop me on the street to inquire about my height and athleticism than I can ever hope to count.

They normally start by asking whether I play basketball, and when I say no they typically move onto volleyball, and then track, and then it normally gets so awkward at that point that they just stop talking. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I had just forced myself as a child to play all the sports I could manage and hope the muscle memory would fix my incoordination, whether I would have a different contentment in life if I didn’t have to watch people’s faces fall as they realize I’m not using my height as the athletic advantage people so often think it is. But my brain and my body were not created for competitive, rigorous, organized sports no matter how much I’ve tried to force it. I am still learning how best to respond when someone has a little bit too much shock in their voice when I say I don’t play basketball, and when I go to basketball games I try to figure out how many players I’m taller than, and then I laugh.

My feet hang off the end of my queen sized mattress at home, and they hang off the end of my twin XL mattress at college too. I still haven’t been able to decide if it hasn’t affected me all that much or if my body is so used to my feet going numb that I don’t notice it anymore.

The first time I went to a photoshoot to model I took one look at the backdrop they had set up and knew the top of my head was probably going to be taller than the top of the sheet. I told the photographer that I didn’t think I was going to fit in the frame, but he told me I would.

And then he called me beautiful, so I stopped worrying that my arms looked too lanky compared to everyone else’s.

Little girls don’t need to hear the controversies about the tall girl movie. They don’t need to hear the people mocking the main character or making fun of people who are uncomfortable with their extra height or comparing their personal struggles like it’s some kind of competition. What those girls need to hear is that when they grow up they’re going to stand out a lot, but never in a bad way. They need to know where they can find pants that might fit and how to respond when people ask them why they don’t play sports and why their physical insecurities are never invalid just because someone says models are always tall. They need to know why they should never be embarrassed to be taller than everyone else. I know there are girls out there like me, girls who can’t tell if they’ll ever quite grow into their body, who wonder if they’ll ever feel comfortable straightening their back to their full height. I know beautiful, elongated girls like me exist, and they deserve a story that isn’t Tall Girl.

WORDS RILEY McCALL DESIGN ELLA POPPEN 49

THE ODESSEY 700 B.C.E One of the earliest appearances of witchcraft in literature can be traced to Circe from The Odyssey. She was portrayed as a beautiful, powerful witch who had the ability to turn men into pigs. This mirrors the infatuation Ancient Greeks of Homer’s time had with magic.

Not only was Circe powerful, but she was a seductive temptress. Similarly, many ancient Greeks felt attracted to the sense of magic and what it could do for them.

Despite the fact that most accounts of magic being used by the Greeks, through amulets, curse tablets, etc. was actually used by men to settle political disputes and relationship problems, witches in early Greek literature were portrayed by attractive women. Circe, therefore, represented the lust and attractiveness that magic and witchcraft wielded.

OF THE In early 2022, a pastor in Tennessee held a book burning where participants burned Harry Potter books and Twilight books, as well as tarot cards, crystals, and all other items deemed “demonic.” Witchcraft is a practice rooted in ancient civilization and society. Throughout history, literature demonstrates a changing perspective on witchcraft, from The Odyssey to Macbeth to the “demonic tales” of Harry Potter.

We can explore how society’s view of witchcraft has evolved by looking at the literature in which it appears.

THE ODES AND EPODES OF HORACE 30 B.C.E Ancient Romans portrayed their witches in literature as deformed hags, as seen through Horace’s Epodes, which tells the stories of many witches, including Canidia who is portrayed as an ugly hag. It is interesting to note, however, that these ugly depictions of witches were often reserved for women, while male witches were written as wise apprentices, who were scholars in the arts of magics.The reason female witches were portrayed so poorly by Romans was motivated by patriarchal ideas, as what Romans were truly afraid of was powerful women. They could justify their fear of women with powerful abilities by creating characters to represent them which were truly scary.

Romans were also exposed to the practices of magic through the observation of Celtic Druidism. Within their own communities, Celtic Druids did not have to pay taxes or serve in battle. Additionally, female Druids held equal status to that of men. They were permitted to take part in war and were allowed to divorce their husbands, privileges that were often denied to ancient women. The Romans, however, viewed them as savages, believing that they participated in sacrificial ceremonies. These ideas can be seen reflected in Horace’s portrayal of Canidia as in Epode 5 she prepares to sacrifice a boy to make a love potion. These ideas prove that the terrifying Roman depictions of witchcraft and magic were rooted in both sexism and ethnocentrism.

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THE DAEMONOLOGIE 1597 A.D The fear presented by ancient Romans surrounding witches and powerful women continued throughout the rise of Christianity. King James VI of Scotland and I of England was adamantly afraid of witches, as he believed they conspired to harm him and take the throne from him. He wrote 3 books known as Daemonologie, which discusses witchcraft and sorcery. His ideas are essentially misogyny disguised as Christianity. In his books, he specifically states that women are more likely to succumb to the lures of witchcraft as they were more frail than men and therefore more likely to be manipulated by the devil.

Daemonologie inspired people such as Mathew Hopkins, also known as the Witch-Finder General to hunt down and prosecute alleged witches. Mathew Hopkins used the fear invoked by King James’ Daemonologie to justify sending around 300 women to their deaths, though I’m sure the payment that accompanied the job didn’t hurt. The more confessions Hopkins got, the more he got paid. Hopkins, therefore, often targeted older, single women. An old woman has always been used as a negative depiction for a witch in literature, as many people already held negative prejudices for the old body, especially when it belonged to a woman. Witches were also said to have a mark given to them by the Devil. These marks, conveniently, might look similar to that of an age spot. These were easy targets for Hopkins, guaranteeing he would make more money.

HARRY POTTER 1997 A.D

MACBETH 1623 A.D

The Harry Potter books sparked a lot of controversy when they hit the shelves. Many parents feared that the books’ glorification of magic and witchcraft would have negative impacts on their children. Even today, many people are still afraid of this fictional wizard.

Some have even decided to burn the books, just as many women throughout history have been burned for being accused of witchcraft. This shows the impact that years of the demonization of witchcraft has on society.

Due to the common targets of witchcraft at the time, it comes as no surprise that the witches in Shakespeare’s Macbeth were depicted in a similar fashion. It’s unknown whether the Weird sisters were written to critique the king or appease him. Regardless, painting witches in this fashion, deliberately creating them to be ugly hags with beards creates a sense of fear and disgust surrounding powerful women. Witches have been painted in this light for centuries, as we saw with the Odes of Horace, before they were even associated with a Christian Devil. The fact that this image of witchcraft predates Christianity proves th at a fear of witches has never been exclusively a Christian one, though Christians do associate witches with the Devil. Perhaps Shakespeare recognized this, and his over the top, horrifying writings of the Weird sisters was actually a parody for society’s irrational fears. Hopkins, guaranteeing he would make more money.

Despite the fact that we no longer burn witches at the stake, that doesn’t mean the fear is lost on society. People have always feared that which they don’t understand. Mix this fear with sexism, ageism, and patriarchy and you have yourself a witch hunt. Witchcraft is still practiced today, all over the world, but since people can’t actually burn women for being witches anymore, they’ll just have to settle for Harry Potter books.

WORDS CASSIE WILLIAMS DESIGN DYLAN LUNDQUIST 51

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WORDS SIERRA NEMMERS PHOTOGRAPHY IVY CLEVELAND DESIGN LANIE WEBER 53

Vivienne Westwood has been moving mountains in the fashion industry since the early 80s.

A self taught designer, her vastly unique style inspired a multitude of trends up until her passing in December of 2022. She inspired styles in the punk genre of fashion and beyond as her career progressed. She was not only an advocate for fresh trends in the industry but was very vocal about her political opinions and often expressed them through fashion. Westwood was a firm believer that fashion can be used as a voice to speak against injustices and create an identity for people fighting for the same ideals. She never backed down from stepping outside of the expectation and was a stepping stone for many artists and designers behind her. Like many of the iconic names before her, the Vivienne Westwood brand will prevail as people will keep the edgy look she carefully crafted throughout her career for years to come.

Thank you Dr. Lynch, whose love for Vivienne impacted us all.

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LIVING

LOUDLY Three years ago, during my freshman year of college, I came across a TikTok that changed my life forever.

Well… my fashion life, that is. It was a video describing the “Supermodel Rule of Seven”. This fashion “rule” describes how each item of clothing you wear is a “point” based on how loud the article of clothing is. Black shoes? One point. Striped shirt? Two points.

Multicolored bright pants? At least three, if not four.

Additional accessory (earring/rings/etc)? One point each. As someone who was just starting to discover their own style, I felt like I had won the lottery— I’d been given the cheat code on how to tell if your outfit was too much, not enough, or just right. Simple enough, right?

Wrong.

I let this rule— a video made up from some random person on the internet— define my clothing choices for years. Every time I would do a quick count of my clothing points and it was higher than seven, I felt instantly insecure. People must think I’m a joke. Too eccentric. Too much. I would soon become flooded with self-doubt and discouraged to explore what types of clothing made me happy in fear that I would be judged or look funny.

As I’ve matured in my college career, I’ve learned self doubt can sneak in anywhere if you go into life expecting others will know more than you. That supermodel “rule of seven” that I let dictate my clothing? I can barely find it online when I search for it now. For all I know, that person could have made it up, or it could have been their own personal system, who knows. I spent so long believing in this rule of thumb that I was blinded to the choices I wanted to make—both in my fashion and my everyday life.

WORDS MADDIE KIZER DESIGN JAYNE LEVI 58

The past year, I’ve tried to branch out of the rule of seven and be more bold in my choices. I love stripes, head scarves, bandanas, bright colors, rings and multicolored pants. Some days I go way over what would be considered the “right” amount of points on my outfit, and there are days when I love to dress more comfortably in band t-shirts and leggings and I wouldn’t get to seven by a long shot. This is okay!

Fashion isn’t about playing by other people’s arbitrary rules or climbing to reach someone else’s standards or meeting an aesthetic color palette.

Your clothing is what gives people a sneak peek at the person you are on the inside. Each day, that may look a bit different. Some days are brighter, some days are softer, and some days are in between. There was a time I used to be so afraid of what other people thought of me and the clothes I was wearing, because I was hoping to please other people at the expense of neglecting myself and my inner voice.

Once I learned that fashion was an art for self expression and not for pleasing the eyes of others, I felt free.

Nowadays, sometimes I wear outfits that I know are not everyone’s cup of tea. Sometimes it’s too bright or too busy or maybe too eclectic for someone’s taste. I’ve been told I can “make anything work” and I’ve also been told, “I personally would never be caught dead in that”. Once, that would’ve made me want to shrivel up and hide, but now I try to remain playful and remember my style doesn’t have to be for everyone because I can’t cater to everyone.

I will never be able to make every single person happy all the time with my choices, and I’m learning that is okay. That is human. That is life. That is growth.

Learning to take the opinions of others and take them with a grain of salt can be challenging. It can feel impossibly daunting, and yet, learning to ditch the rule of seven and challenge myself to see beyond an arbitrary point system has been healing. Taking risks and remaining open, staying playful and treating yourself with grace are all rewards that don’t come without a little bit of a push outside of your comfort zone.

Changing up my perception of clothing and finding a style that fits me has been a beautiful journey of self-acceptance and helped me find my voice. Feeling confident that my outsides match my insides is something invaluable, and I’d encourage everyone to explore and be curious and open with their clothing as well. Wear the clothing you want to wear, regardless of what others may think. Try a color you’ve always been afraid of, or a piece of jewelry you’ve always been nervous you couldn’t pull off. Having the confidence to try is the first step towards pulling anything off.

Nowadays, when I look in the mirror and the person staring back at me is dresed in bright colors and jewelry and patterns, I see someone who isn’t afraid to be seen by the world. Someone who is hopeful. Someone who challenges themselves to be bold. I see the version of myself I’ve always wanted to be, and that is a reward so much greater than staying within a certain number of points.

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WORDS SOPHIE HOFFMEIER DESIGN MADDIE NAEVE 60

i remember the way i used to see the moon. the darkness it resides in, its absence of light that i was afraid of. its luminous, yet ominous glow. it is nothing like the sun, i used to think, it could never shine nearly as bright. the sun did not always come outside. it did not always shine, or exude its warmth. sometimes it would even hide behind the clouds as if it was merely a child. but the moon was always there at night. even on the cloudiest of evenings, it would peek through, as if it were playing hide-and-seek. it was not until i was left alone, underneath that celestial body. left to waltz beneath the gleaming sphere in the sky. left to see the cow jump over it, or to say: “goodnight moon,” how could i have been so blind to see the beauty of its enchanting glow? a radiance that even the sun could not emulate. on days the sun does not come out, you can find me waiting for the moon. there is beauty everywhere. in light, in darkness. the sun, and the moon.

WORDS DANI SUNSERI DESIGN MADDIE NAEVE 61

Often in life, you find yourself stumbling into things. So many of us try to plan out our lives, and devise plans for careers, spouses, homes, and vacations, but how often do those plans actually occur? Throughout my life, the parts of my life I’ve attempted to plan for, most often, do not pan out. The best parts were almost never planned. They were never the top of my priorities—they just kind of lurked throughout the background. These great things sneak their way right in front of my peripheral and I stumble my ass head-first into whatever weird thing comes next.

As one who stumbles his way through life, I found myself with an opportunity to bartend at the Black Hawk Hotel. There’s a craft cocktail bar in this hotel called the Bar Winslow. My old roommate worked there and I guess that was enough for them to hire me—even though I couldn’t tell the difference between a bourbon and a rye whiskey.

I’ve been a bartender there for a little over 6 months now, and a couple of weekends ago a customer caught me off guard. Usually, customers will ask how I got the job, how I like it, what my major is, and how old I am—but this customer asked a different question. They asked me why I did it. Why do I bartend? What’s in it for me? I was thrown off guard.

As I reflect upon my experiences behind the bar, I feel something more than a simple monetary transaction.

The service is there on the surface—but underneath there’s something more– something human.

Now, these aspects of my life—these things that I don’t plan for—they are fantastic. But the thing about stumbling into these opportunities—they feel very fast— very overwhelming. You didn’t plan for it so there was no time to reflect on the decision. That night, the night the customer asked me that question, I did not have a good answer for it. I cannot remember what I said for the life of me, but it did spark a curiosity within me. What makes bartending special for me?

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First, let’s get money out of the way.

Money is a big reason for bartending, to say otherwise would simply be disingenuous.

If I was to say I got into this job for a different reason, I am not sure I would be telling the truth.

But as I have continued working and gained experience, I can confidently say that the money is not my favorite part of Bar Winslow. As I reflect upon my experiences behind the bar, I feel something more than a simple monetary transaction. The service is there on the surface—but underneath there’s something more–something human.

Throughout my whole life, I have always had a complicated relationship with alcohol. Honestly, I believe my younger self would be mortified at the idea of me being a bartender. Obviously, I didn’t have anything against the actual substance, more so what that substance made people do, and what I was told alcohol made people do. I was told as a child that alcohol can ruin families, people can slip into addiction, and people can lose themselves in it. Today, I certainly would not fight these ideas—I still agree with all of these ideas—as a child I saw addiction to alcohol up close and personal, and it certainly did suck. I decided as a child that I would never drink. Since what I saw was so bad, I understood that nothing good could come from drinking. My first ever panic attack came at a party in high school where people were drinking and somebody offered me one. The thought of drinking threw me into flight or fight. So perhaps it is a bit ironic that I am a bartender now.

As I reflect on my childhood and the question that customer asked me, I realized that they actually have some correlations. As a child, I saw alcohol as this thing that numbed the pain, it was the easy way out of suffering, but it also led to more suffering, more pain, and none of it was productive. I grew up with the understanding that alcohol took away someone’s humanity. Humanity lives within the struggles of life, of really feeling that pain, feeling that suffering and allowing it to fester within you and out of you. I hated alcohol because it caused people to lose that ability to suffer, it was a way to hide from their suffering, a way for people to hide their humanity.

But as I have been learning of late– life is not so black and white. Most things held as certain have not tasted the sweet essence of uncertainty.

I have realized that my favorite part about this job is seeing the humanity within others. People come in with their suffering plastered across their face like a cover to a novel, saying I choose to share my suffering with you. That is courageous, that is human. When alcohol is abused, when people drink at home alone

to numb whatever feelings of sorrow they may be feeling, that is cowardly. Obviously, I know that people who abuse alcohol still go to bars, and I would not call that brave. I see the people hiding, I see them suffering alone—away from their family. I see the pain in their eyes that tells me I know this next drink won’t fix me but I do not know what else to do. But now, I do not view alcohol and alcoholism as synonymous with each other, I understand that these items can live without correlation. Alcohol itself is not necessarily the problem, the abuse of it is. Alcohol like anything else is like a tool that can be used for terrible evil, but also; unmistakable good. The bright side of alcohol, a bar, the Bar Winslow, is that people can use this place to find community, to find a place to belong, to express pain to others instead of locking it behind a door of drinks. I certainly see addiction in the bar, but I also see people.

I see people coming into the bar and getting one drink, or sometimes none. These types of people are my favorite part of bartending. These types of people make Bar Winslow feel magical.

To put yourself out there, to decide to choose people over being alone is such an expression of bravery and humanity. A lonely man could drown his sorrows alone and locked away in a bedroom. It takes courage to share that sorrow, that pain, with others.

I must end with an honest confession that I still cannot say that alcohol is good. But I recognize the complexity, so I also cannot say that alcohol is bad. I think what I am trying to say is maybe that alcohol itself is not what I ever had a problem with, simply the relationship one has with it. What I do know for certain is that suffering and pain is best expressed together. On the surface, Bar Winslow is just a place to get a cocktail, but what lies underneath that simple transaction is the reason I bartend.

WORDS NATE VOELKER DESIGN LANIE WEBER 63

LIFE OF A LUCKY GIRL A day in the life of a Lucky Girl starts with waking up well before noon, grateful to have another day. After drinking water, a lucky girl then speaks their affirmations and manifestations to the universe, sometimes looking at herself in the mirror and repeating them back. She dresses as her most comfortable and confident self, ready to take on the day.

What does it mean though to have this “Lucky Girl Syndrome”? Well, for a lucky girl, the world conspires in her favor and everything works out for her because she simply believes it will. Noting any positive patterns, but never expecting any. This can look like getting the last cup of coffee before the shop closes down, having your friend pay for your drink unexpectedly, or even having the professor give you more time to complete an assignment. What goes around comes around for a lucky girl.

Just like the rest of the population, a lucky girl isn’t always at her best, but still tends to find pockets of joy throughout her day. For a lucky girl, they keep Pronoia in their back pocket—the idea that the world is aspiring to do them good.

At the end of her day, the lucky girl gives thanks to the universe for a day full of opportunities before getting the rest she needs to do it all again.

Lucky Girls ultimately get what they want out of life.

WORDS ERIN MURPHY DESIGN JAYNE LEVI 64

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