DAILY WEEKEND
memory edition
I love when memories I’ve completely forgotten pop back up.
For instance, TLC’s “No Scrubs” came on the radio the other day and I suddenly remembered driving to school with my brother and neighbor and how one time this song came on as we pulled into the parking lot at school so they leaned out the windows singing it to half asleep high schoolers walking from their cars… “Hangin’ out the passenger’s side of his best friend’s ride/ tryin’ to holla at me” haha Or the time I was sitting in the courthouse lobby waiting to have a
judge judge the community service hours I’d completed.
I hated going
to the courthouse because my parents didn’t know I’d been caught shoplifting and every time I was there I’d see someone I knew! Ugh. Luckily, this time it was a friend from school who’d recently been caught smoking a joint.
He said his
dad told him to change this morning because he had been wearing his Jimi Hendrix hoodie.
His dad said
obviously the judge isn’t gonna wanna see you wearing a Jimi Hendrix shirt when you’re facing possession charges.
I thought that was funny
cuz I hadn’t thought of it either. So we were sitting there talking
about being an obvious drug user in court and he gestures toward a couple across the room and tells me they’re tweaking right now!
I asked
how he could tell and he said he just could. At the time I just saw two dingy adults (Classic Mason County) but I think now I could recognize their fidgety, paranoid behavior.
Back then it was
fascinating to me... like how are they chill being here high!?
Backpacking is so sensual!
That’s
how I would describe all the memories I have of the trip Jess n I took.
Like the sweat dripping from
my head and absorbing into my bandana, and how wonderful it felt to dip that bandana into a cold creek and return it to my forehead! (Thanks for showing me that!) How at some point every steep step brought on the burn yet there was nowhere to go but up. How somehow going back down hill the next day was also exhausting?!
How imperceptible
distances are when you’re looking at mountains up close.
How high up
certain landmarks seemed til we pass them and had new landmarks above us!?
Reaching the little lake that
was our destination and then having a helluva time reaching a campsite on this tiny crazy trail.
The shape
of the rock that stuck out as a peninsula over the lake. The dark water, the blue of the water, the dark green bright green of the water all depending how you looked at it. And Brrrr so cold! So cold I wasn’t sure if I’d make it back to shore without freezing up if I jumped in off the rock.
The look on day
hikers’ faces as we descended, heavy footed and dirty; with smiling, sweaty faces. haggard?!
But did we look that
My one and only
backpacking trip to date and an incredible memory. for being my guide.
Thank you Jess We should one
day do a Daily Weekend Crew
backpacking trip!? How wildly fun would that be!
I was born in an Ohio factory in the summer of 1995, and was shipped to Alabama. A nice old couple purchased me and took me many places. They loved Charlie Parker and so did I. His Sax solos carried us to Florida several times, and once to New Orleans. The old man’s name was Jim and hers was Stella, they loved each other, I knew cause I could always feel the weight of there intertwined hands on top of my center console. We drove together a lot, the air in flowing through my filter was always hot and damp. Tasted good. Once when they were parked on the side of the road looking at a map, and alligator crept straight under my trunk. They never knew, wish I could have told them; they would have gotten a kick out of that. After two and half years I was sold abruptly to a sleazy man with a mustache, he cleaned me up and parked me in a lot near the beach. A few people drove me around from time to time, but that all stopped when Hurricane Lenny hit. The winds were howling, debris was flying, and water fell from the sky like nothing I’d ever seen. It didn’t take long before I could feel the salty water touching my tires, and soon after I could feel it touching my brakes. I held on tight as water seeped into my cabin, and as a sign reading “No Credit? No Problem!” crashed into my windshield. I thought I was a goner, I thought I was junkyard food. “Stella!!!! Jim!!!!!” I yelled. No one replied. Two days after the winds had stopped, I new my time had come. I could hear that old son-of-a-bitch yapping. He said, “junk the ones I tag in orange.” So there I waited, waiting for a crude peppering of spray paint. I could here the rattle of his can shaking, as he walked through the lot. Finally his hand touched my hood. Inspecting me oh so lazily. I felt his sausage fingers touch my handle and open the door, this was followed by a fervent inhale, and then a low murmur, sounding simultaneously disgusted and happy. He walked away without spraying me. “Thank the Lord Almighty!” I yelled. I was taken to a shop and cleaned out, given a new title and shipped to Washington State. The last thing I heard the mustachioed wonder say was, “No one will ever know”. I was quickly sold to a fiery haired young woman who went by the name of Katy. She was fresh out of college. We spent every weekday morning and evening together traveling too and from her work. She liked drinking her coffee while she drove, which often resulted in me getting burned, but it tasted good so I didn’t mind so much. She did smoke sometimes and at first I didn’t care for that, but after a while I began to really like it.
Katy and I put on a lot of miles together, and all in all had a great time. In our time together we had three dogs. None of them thought much of me, but the worst was the big one, Lola. She didn’t like it when she got left inside alone so she decided to try and eat different parts of my interior, including a few seatbelts, the glove box and my beloved center console. I actually grew to like Lola, as I grew older. She helped me realize that appearances were bull shit if you weren’t having fun, and I learned that I actually like playing rough. Katy, as successful as she was in the rest of her life, had terrible luck with cars. In our partnership I was stolen twice. Both times were by goddamn teenagers who wanted to go for a joy ride. I wouldn’t have minded so much but both groups ripped out my ignition slot and used a screwdriver to wake me up. After the second time Katy decided to invest in an alarm system rather than fix the ignition; a wise choice on her part, but that meant I needed to be started with a screwdriver. This was a bit awkward at first be I soon grew to like the uniqueness it brought me. We also got into several accidents together, none of which were her fault. I was almost totaled twice but managed to always bounce back. Over the 11-year course of our partnership her life changed a lot. However our relationship was sure and steady. We never gave up on the other good times or bad. The last trip we did together she was pregnant with her first child. We drove down to California, where she would start a new job and begin to raise her family. I sat untouched for nearly three months, so I figured I was retired and thought I might as well enjoy it. However, the beep of my alarm woke me on a sunny March morning of 2011. My door opened and in slammed the ass of Katy’s longhaired little brother. I had smelled his ass before, however this is the first it had been in the driver’s seat. His lovely girlfriend and older brother soon jumped in after him. They started me up and began a trip to Washington. This would be the first of a series of trips I did with this young man. He hardly drove me less than 100 miles at a time, and he liked to play rough. He liked dirt roads next to rivers, and getting up high in the mountains. He had terrible gas, just like his sister drank a ton of coffee, much of which he split. Our most memorable trip together was in the summer of 2011. He and his sole mate drove me to New Mexico, the Land of Enchantment. We stopped in all the states between the two and had lots of laughs and moments of wonder.
I knew the two of them were in love cause I could feel there intertwined hands on my chewed up center console. On that trip the three of us saw fire, rain, and sunny days we thought would never end. In NM many of Ken’s trips were with his good buddy Andy. The two of them loved bullshitting, and I would chime in every now and again too with a rumble from my muffler. Once, when they were drinking some beer on my hood, Ken carved his name into me, he said, “Car I love you”, and I replied, “and I you also… as well” The last time we passed emissions was a miracle. I kept a straight face and told the emission test computer “Hello Mr. Computer Man, I don’t know of any problems today.” When in reality, I knew of all kinds of shit that had gone wrong in my innards. Somehow that moron bought it. After a few more trips back and forth between NM and WA, I started to tell Ken that the brakes were starting to go. All that salt water from Alabama was catching up with me. Also we found a leak in the exhaust line. Even worse I started to have trouble getting fired up. Ken told me that we had to pass emissions in a few months and that It would take $3000 dollars to make it so. He also told me he found a great deal on a new car. I was sold for $250 and put out to pasture in the December of 2014, 19 years old, with a quarter million miles. If you look on carfax you will see that I am worth negative $2420, but don’t believe it, cause I am priceless, I wasn’t pretty but I was one of a kind and I never gave in. Therefore I say to all of you out there, I say to you lowly children of metal and corporeal matter alike, break through the wall your self esteem pretends, and never give up on you or your friends.
The First Gift by H.L. Reclam Thursday Mother’s Day is on Sunday. I love my mother. I have been saving my chores money for two months. I am going to buy her something special. And make her breakfast. I know how to do that now. My sister says that I always burn the toast and that my eggs taste like rubber but I know she is just saying that because she is jealous. I had the breakfast idea first. Friday Dad promised to take me to K-Mart tomorrow so I can buy something special. The most special. The most special-a-list present ever! Saturday I did it. I found it. No gift I ever give will ever be so perfect. My dad let me lead him around the store. We walked aisle after aisle. I stopped as soon as I saw it. The gift. The special gift. THE MOST SPEICIAL-A-LIST PERFECT GIFT EVER. Mommy will be so happy. She may even cry. She does that when she is happy. Sunday I couldn’t sleep last night. I was too excited! Today is the day that I give Mommy my first gift that I paid for and thought of all by myself. This is a big deal for a five year old. I made the card before I went to sleep. I got some water on it but Mommy wont mind. I have to wait for Dad to make breakfast. He moves so slow in the morning before his coffee. Mommy tried to come out before the table was ready but I told her she had to wait. I took her the newspaper so she had something to do while I cooked. The table is perfect. There is a plate in the middle, two forks on the left, one knife and two spoons on the right with a cup of hot chocolate, Mommy’s favorite, and a glass of orange juice above. Mommy doesn’t need anything other than one fork and her hot chocolate but the fancy plates always have more than they need. The toast is a little black and the eggs are mostly cheese but that doesn’t matter. Mommy’s gift is waiting for her in her chair and everything looks perfect. I tell her it is time for breakfast. I feel like it is Christmas! I cannot wait to see her face when she sees the most perfect present ever. Here she comes…
Mommy walked into the dining room. She smiled and looked at her placemat. After a moment she let out a gasp, covered her mouth and started laughing! What is so funny? What is she laughing at? I looked at my dad. He said nothing. I looked at my sister. She said nothing. I looked back at Mommy who was still laughing. “Hannah, honey, did you do all of this?” she asked holding in more giggles. I told her I had. I did everything all by myself. “Misha, you let her buy this?” she asked Dad. He nodded. My mother then turned back to me and hugged me tight. I could feel her slightly bouncing. I couldn’t tell if it was crying or laughing. I wanted it to be crying. She cries when she loves things. I faced her. She was laughing. “Hannah. This is beautiful but this is a memorial wreath. You buy these when someone dies.” I am the worst! My first gift I bought with my own chores money for my mother is a dead wreath! Happy Mother’s Day, I think you are dead. I thought she would like the flowers because they would live forever and it had a sign that said “mom”, she would always know it was from me. But no, this gift says, “I love you and I will miss you while you are in heaven”. I am the worst. This is the worst gift ever. Not special at all. We have to return it. Sunday Afternoon Mom drove us back to K-Mart so we could return the dead wreath. The same woman was working. “Oh my goodness Loretta, thank God! When Misha and Hannah came in the other day and she picked out that wreath, I was so worried. I checked all the papers and hadn’t seen anything.” I killed you for a day, Happy Mother’s Day.
10 years ago I was 15 years old. My town was working class, but not soot covered. Suburban, but without cul-de-sacs. There was a small, local hardcore scene -- but I wasn’t allowed to go to the venue after an altercation involving a knife made the small local newspaper. I lived ‘out of town’ and also didn’t have a driver’s license. As you can imagine, this was an equation for angst. I realize now how self-indulgent this music is among teenagers like myself; I think I had unique experiences, but in the grand scheme of life struggles it was really fucking comfortable. But at the same time... there’s something about that dissatisfied, teenage sentiment that I still find valid and interesting even as I get older. I’m just strongly opposed to the idea that at some point, we ‘become’ a mature adult. Or the idea that we ever stop being ‘teenagers.’ Maybe I’m still just angsty, but regardless - then or now - I think we have a right to resist, and whine and bitch. To insist on a better future. Just think what would happen if we didn’t? reality hungry...weekend greedy
The SO TEN YEARS AGO Playlist Russian Roulette - Tsunami Bomb “Something isn’t right, something’s got you down” - that’s for damn sure! Hash Pipe - Weezer “I can’t help my feelings I’ll go out of my mind...” Bouncing off the Walls - Sugarcult Looking like a fool and pretending not to care...but caring a lot. Fat Lip - Sum 41 “A victim of conformity?” “Casualty of society?” “Fall in line?” Fuck that shit! What’s My Age Again? - blink 182 The ultimate question....still relevant. Wrong Way - Sublime Prob not the most apt... but reminds becoming aware of the horrific abuse some of my female friends had endured. Gut punch. Okay, I Believe You but My Tommy Gun Don’t - Brand New An angsty anthem at its finest. “Falling apart?” “Keeping secrets?” “Loss of control?” Spiderwebs - No Doubt Gwen Stephani was cool and the only small chested female celebrity to speak of for a long time. Also because weirdos tended to get my phone number. Pretty Fly For a White Guy - The Offspring Posers... wannabes... who needs em?? Unfortunately, these are the assholes who seem to end up in charge of the adult world. Move to Bremerton - MxPx If only my past self knew that one day I actually (almost) do. Ha. Try Honesty - Billy Talent “I’m insane” - “it’s your fault” - yep...I was such a dumb little asshole. My life wasn’t that hard. Tribute - Tenacious D Still brings a smile to my face. Face your demons, do your best, have a fucking good time and don’t take yourself too seriously. Good Riddance - Green Day Despite Billy Joe’s best hopes, I did NOT have the time of my life in high school. But nothing quite captures it like this song.
weekend over