Wisdom
12 • Daily Corinthian
Newly chaste teen feels guilty deceiving innocent boy DEAR ABBY: I am in high school and have always been able to get whatever guy I wanted. My reputation at school is sort of “loose and easy.� I haven’t had sex in eight months because I met a sweet, amazing guy whom I want to marry. He’s a virgin, and I think he thinks I’m one, too. He doesn’t go to my school, so he doesn’t know about my old reputation. Should I let him keep thinking I’m still innocent? I feel like a worthless used rag. When I’m with him, I am worth something – I’m the whole world to him. I want it to stay like that. But I know that by not telling him, I’m lying. He doesn’t deserve that – and I feel I don’t deserve him. Please help. – NEW “ME� IN ARIZONA DEAR NEW YOU: Before I answer your question, there are some things I would like you to understand. First, you are “worth something� whether you are with this boy or not. It is dangerous to judge yourself through
the eyes of another person. It is far more important that you can look Abigail at yourself Van Buren in a mirror and Dear Abby know you are a good person because you try every day to do what is moral and right. Practice that, and no one will ever again make you feel like a used rag. You are still in high school, and that’s early to be thinking about marriage. I’m advising you to tell this boy the truth because if you don’t, there is a good chance that eventually he will hear it from someone else. If he drops you because of it, it will not be because you don’t deserve him, but because he doesn’t deserve you. DEAR ABBY: I’m wondering if you can help me. I have been friendly with couples, and when an argument arises I have been caught in the
middle. Sometimes I have felt forced to take sides. Then what happened was, they wound up mending fences and repeating to the other what I said during their split. It has put me in an awkward position when we’re together. How should I handle this in the future? – TORN IN DALLAS DEAR TORN: In the future, when your friends have a spat with a spouse or significant other and start to dump on you, politely decline to listen. Say, “If you have a complaint about ( ), you should work it out with him/her because I’m not comfortable hearing this.� Either that, or do a lot of listening and comment, “Oh, that must be painful.� Period. That way you’re saying nothing you won’t later regret. The exception would be if you were told about an abusive relationship, in which case you should recommend a domesticviolence hotline. DEAR ABBY: My husband of 30 years is easily startled. If I enter a room without a warn-
ing, he reacts as though he is in danger. He yells, “Don’t do that, or you’ll give me a heart attack!� Since our retirements, this has become an issue. I don’t understand his reaction – he wasn’t in the military, didn’t have a dangerous job and hasn’t been in a disaster. I feel like an intruder in my own home. He doesn’t think he has a problem. Your thoughts? – WIFE OF A JUMPY HUBBY DEAR WIFE: Has your husband always been this way, or is this new behavior? If it’s new behavior, it should be discussed with his doctor. He may suffer from a hearing loss or some other problem. And because he finds being “surprised� upsetting, try to accommodate him and not take it personally. (Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.)
Horoscopes It could have been so easy. Venus is known to cool off as she transits Capricorn in search of a more practical and traditional mode of love. And though she’s but a few days into this journey, Uranus in Aries isn’t about to let things get boring. Filled with rebellious excitement and wielding the element of surprise, Uranus gives romance a nice shake. ARIES (March 21-April 19). A boost in prestige makes this a fine day for sales and dealing with the public. The rules in business and in your personal life are the same: You offer something of value in exchange for something of equal value to you. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You can read the social cues and make a pretty accurate guess as to how another person is feeling. But can you read an entire room? If so, the world is your oyster today. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). There’s a time to be open and curious and a time to step back into what you know and honor the tenets that got you where you are. The latter instinct serves you well
this afternoon. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Your sign mate Carl Jung suggested that people don’t really solve their problems; they outgrow them. You’ll note how this is true in your own life while doing the things that are conducive to your own personal growth. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). What was once a raw idea is now getting organized, molded and shaped into an actuality. You’ll spend your weekend polishing and honing this highly original creation. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You enrich your loved ones by exploring what’s fun for you in the world. You pick up ways of interacting, new experiences and all kinds of fun in the outside world that you can bring back to your nearest and dearest. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). An uncharacteristic stubbornness arises in you. Why should you always be the one to pick up the slack? You may as well take charge, because you’re just not in the mood to follow anyone else now. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov.
21). The places you turn to find humor may disappoint. You’ll have to come up with your own methods to induce laughter, but you can be quite resourceful in this, and those around you will be glad to know you. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Emotional muscle building is much harder and requires greater self-discipline than physical muscle building. You’ll manage your feelings well. Better to get mad on purpose than on accident. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). As for your heroes, it’s good that you’ve found people to admire and follow. But right now, you make as much sense as any of them, if not more. So follow yourself! AQUARIUS (Jan. 20Feb. 18). Disagreement is solved through agreement. Find something you both believe, and start there. You’re skilled at making others feel comfortable enough to talk with you. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Though there are many competitive aspects to life, it helps to remember that life on the whole is not a
competition. Those who go looking for ways in which they are better or worse are only borrowing trouble. TODAY’S BIRTHDAY (Jan. 12). You’ll helm an important mission. It’s unofficial; most things worth doing are. You have a way of getting everyone in your group to feel the excitement you feel and work toward shared goal. Dates in February will open your eyes. Family dynamics iron out in March. You’ll seal a deal in April. Aquarius and Gemini people adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 30, 1, 28, 15 and 6. CELEBRITY PROFILES: Colorful Capricorn Kirstie Alley was a crowd favorite of “Dancing with the Stars: All-Stars,� bringing her humor and sensuality to each Cha Cha and Tango. Her natal sun and Mercury in Capricorn suggests a talent for communicating directly. Her moon and Jupiter in Pisces adds imagination, whimsy and an artistic temperament to the mix. ■If you would like to write to Holiday Mathis, please go to www.creators. com and click on “Write the Author� on the Holiday Mathis page.
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Today In History Today is Saturday, Jan. 12, the 12th day of 2013. There are 353 days left in the year.
Today’s Highlight: On Jan. 12, 1948, the U.S. Supreme Court, in Sipuel v. Board of Regents of University of Oklahoma, ruled that state law schools could not discriminate against applicants on the basis of race.
On this date: In 1519, Holy Roman Emperor Maximilian I died. In 1773, the first public museum in America was organized in Charleston, S.C. In 1828, the United States and Mexico signed a Treaty of Limits defining the boundary between the two countries to be the same as the one established by an 1819 treaty between the U.S. and Spain. In 1912, textile workers at the Everett Mill in Lawrence, Mass., (most of them immigrant women) walked off the job to protest wage cuts. In 1915, the House of Representatives rejected, 204-174, a constitutional amendment giving women the right to vote. In 1932, Hattie W. Caraway became the first woman elected to the U.S. Senate after initially being appointed to serve out the remainder of the term of her late husband, Thaddeus. In 1959, Berry Gordy, Jr. founded Motown Records (originally Tamla Records) in Detroit. In 1966, President Lyndon B. Johnson said in his State of the Union address that the U.S. should stay in South Vietnam until Commu-
nist aggression there was ended. In 1969, the New York Jets of the American Football League upset the Baltimore Colts of the National Football League 16-7 in Super Bowl III, played at the Orange Bowl in Miami. In 1971, the groundbreaking situation comedy “All in the Family� premiered on CBS television. In 1987, Anglican Church envoy Terry Waite arrived in Lebanon on his latest mission to win the release of Western hostages; however, Waite ended up being taken captive himself, and wasn’t released until 1991. In 2010, Haiti was struck by a magnitude-7 earthquake, killing as many as 300,000 residents and leaving over 1.5 million people homeless.
Ten years ago: Blamed by shareholders for AOL Time Warner’s sharp fall in fortunes, Steve Case announced he was stepping down as chairman of the conglomerate he’d helped to create. Maurice Gibb, a member of the famed disco band the Bee Gees, died at a Miami Beach hospital at age 53. Former Argentine military ruler Leopoldo Galtieri died in Buenos Aires at age 76.
Five years ago: President George W. Bush, visiting Bahrain, said he was cheered by news that Iraq’s parliament had approved legislation reinstating thousands of former supporters of Saddam Hussein’s dissolved Baath party to government jobs.
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