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INSIDER_Jun_Jul10 Iss3_52pp

12/6/10

4:59 PM

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HUMOUR ME

Frank Sales

“Two Florida women face charges after police said they threatened workers at a fast food restaurant with a Taser.”

A

frank sales

UK grandmother has been fined $1,700, given a dusk-to-dawn curfew, and been electronically tagged for selling a goldfish to a child.The 66 year-old pet shop owner was prosecuted after the local council sent a 14-year-old boy to buy a goldfish in a “sting” operation following reports that their shop had sold a gerbil to a teenager with learning difficulties. Investigators swooped, so to speak, after she sold the fish without

asking his age or how the fish would be cared for. A 29-year-old Illinois woman, arrested after a dispute with a taxi driver, used her customary“one phone call” to call 911 and report that she was “trapped inside a detention facility”. (Police added abuse of 911 to the charges.) Police stopped a 37-year-old woman in Florida driving erratically. After several implausible explanations, she admitted she had a razor and was giving herself a “bikini shave” as she drove. She faces several traffic charges. The British Home Office has granted Pagan police officers the right to priority days off for official festivals, such as naked dancing and the festival of lactating sheep. Also in the UK, prisoners about to be released who had previously taken drugs but cured their addiction while incarcerated are being purposely re-addicted using methadone administered by wardens, following Government guidelines. Officials say the former addicts will then be less likely to overdose when they get back on the street. A Phoenix county sheriff has started a program he calls “Pedal Vision”, in which inmates pedal stationary bikes to generate electricity for television sets.The bikes are customised to turn on connected TV sets once inmates pedal enough to generate 12-volts of electricity. An hour of pedalling equals an hour of television.The Sheriff says he started the program with female inmates because they seemed more receptive. On the other side of the law, reacting to complaints from the public that many of Nepal’s officers are too overweight to perform their duties properly, the

Nepalese Police Headquarters in Kathmandu has initiated a weight-loss program that stipulates officers must lose weight, or face being “barred from promotion and transferred to less well-paying posts”. A police spokesman said: “When you are fat, you look lousy and it’s obvious that perception of people towards you is not positive.” Two Florida women face charges after police said they threatened workers at a fast food restaurant with a Taser. Witnesses say the women were mad because they did not get the mustard and mayonnaise packets they requested with their order. Philadelphia police say officers attending a domestic dispute maced,Tasered and shot in the back a man who fled the scene.They are just not sure in which order, said a public information officer. A Massachusetts man offered to trade his 3-month-old daughter to an employee at a gas station and convenience store in exchange for beer, or perhaps crack cocaine. When an employee asked the 24-year-old man about the age of his baby, he allegedly put his three-month old daughter and her stroller into the employee’s truck.“For two 40s, you can have her,” the man told the employee. Police say that “40” is slang for both beer sold in a 40-ounce bottle and crack cocaine and investigators are not sure which he meant. Also in Massachusetts, police arrested a 53-year-old man for indecent exposure in his car, despite his claims it was all a misunderstanding.The air-conditioner at work is really cold, he claimed, and when he walks out, the hot air is so overwhelming that he usually takes off his trousers for the drive home. And then he stops on the street somewhere and puts them back on, but sometimes, there may be an itch that needs addressing. Also in his car: a woman's skirt, undies with the crotch cut out, binoculars, and a travel book stuffed with pictures of naked women. We could say more and probably will do so next issue…

50 //SECURITY INSIDER JUN/JUL 2010

Security Insider June 2010  
Security Insider June 2010  

Bi-Monthly SecurityI ndustry Magazine published by Australia's Largest Security Industry Organisation - ASIAL. Designed by Martin at Webfx2...

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