Nettleham News - 2014-01 - Spring 2014

Front cover photograph by Nigel Kingston

The village magazine of Nettleham: Lincolnshire

Spring 2014

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THE PLOUGH PUB & RESTAURANT

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Selection of traditional Batemans’ ales

Air-conditioned smoke-free atmosphere ●

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Home-made food 7 days a week

Lunches, evening meals and Sunday lunches

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Hemswell Antique Centres Coffee Shop

Take time out from browsing the largest selection of antiques and collectables in Europe and visit our licensed Coffee Shop where, in addition to a range of refreshing cold drinks and hot beverages, you can enjoy a choice of freshly prepared meals and light snacks, using only the very best fresh, locally-sourced produce.

Open 10am - 5pm every day Caenby Corner Estate, Hemswell Cliff, Gainsborough, Lincolnshire DN21 5TJ

Specialities from the blackboard

FREE PARKING

Special Senior Citizen 2-course Sunday lunches

Telephone 01427 668389

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Open all day 7 days a week

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Quiz night every Sunday and Wednesday

1 The Green, Nettleham, Lincoln

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LF N SE O UR GO YO T EA TR

Bob & Pauline Woolley offer a warm and friendly welcome at

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Do you need help looking after your trees?

Not sure if your tree is safe?

Concerned about Ash die-back disease, or other tree ailments?

For professional and independent advice please contact me ● Over 30 years’ experience of working with trees, gardens and woodlands ● The Arboricultural Surveyor for Lincolnshire County Council ● Public liability and professional indemnity insurance held ● Technician member of the Arboricultural Association

Email: enquiries@hemswell-antiques.com

● Based in Nettleham

H E M S W E L L

Sara Bright TechArborA sarabright141@gmail.com

C E N T R E S

or view online at

01522 750275

People trust Mundys A high quality 21st century marketing service: Worldwide access to your property via the internet Voted Lincolnshire’s top Estate Agent in 2012 Valuation by qualified local valuers (Telephone or email for FREE valuation within 48 hours)

Unique Nettleham village video guide

Late opening

www.hemswell-antiques.com

01522 875939 Mobile 07885 914305

A unique café, shop and online mail order company for the discerning cheese lover Dispatching fabulous tasty farmhouse cheese throughout mainland UK Our cheese selections make the perfect gift for all occasions

NEW

SHOP NOW OPEN Our new shop now enables us to offer an even greater selection of farmhouse and artisan cheeses The café offers local and seasonal produce and is open as usual

29 Silver Street, Lincoln LN2 1AS

Telephone 01522 510044 Email: info@mundy-uk.com

Café: 1 St Martin’s Lane Lincoln LN2 1HY Shop: 28 The Strait Lincoln LN2 1JD

www.mundy-uk.com

Tel: 01522 511003

Specialists in Nettleham properties

Open Mon - Sat 10.00am - 4.30pm

www.thecheesesociety.co.uk

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From the Editor

DEADLINES Nettleham News magazine is a quarterly publication and the deadlines for receiving contributions for each of the editions are:

Nigel Kingston 1 High Street Nettleham Lincoln LN2 2PL

NEXT EDITION

Telephone: 01522 753000 Email: nettlehamnews@ntlworld.com

1st 1st 1st 1st

FEBRUARY for the spring edition MAY for the summer edition AUGUST for the autumn edition NOVEMBER for the winter edition

All contributions should be sent to the Editor

Read Nettleham News online at: www.nettleham.info Welcome to Nettleham News A very warm welcome to the spring 2014 edition of your village magazine - I sincerely hope you continue to find it interesting, informative and perhaps sometimes a little amusing as well.

For some strange reason, the last edition contained a greater than usual number of rather negative and depressing items, sadly resulting in an altogether rather ‘grumpy’ Christmas edition!

However, this year starts on a more optimistic note with a greater proportion of positive material. Of course, there are a number of complaints, criticisms, moans, etc, all of which are very welcome indeed as they bring alternative views on subjects which are important to the village and about which readers quite rightly may have different ideas and strong opinions.

As ever, many thanks to all those who have contributed items for this edition - it’s the wide-ranging variety of the material sent in for publication that enables me to put together a lively and interesting magazine.

If you wish to contribute anything at all an article, letter, short story, poem, joke, etc, please don’t hesitate - all contributions are always most welcome.

Business Advertisers I would also like to take this opportunity to thank all the businesses who are advertising with us throughout 2014 and I would urge readers to support them wherever possible, as they continue to support our village magazine with the funds generated by their greatly valued advertisements.

Crossword Competition There was an unusually high number of entries for the Christmas Crossword and Anagram competition in the last edition perhaps I made it too easy!

The lucky winner to be the first correct entry drawn is announced on page 69.

A Royal Visitor to the Village You read it here first! On Tuesday 11 March 2014, HRH The Duke of Kent will be visiting Nettleham to officially open the newly regenerated Bishop’s Palace site.

During the event, which will take place around 10.30am, the Duke will plant a special memorial oak tree in the centre of the newly-created Bishop’s Meadow. Let’s hope the weather is kind on the day!

News of the latest progress on the site appears on page 55, but unfortunately, on other pages in this edition, there is a call for dogs to be banned from this village amenity because some irresponsible owners are not picking up after their pets, creating a health hazard and an unpleasant aspect for other walkers. Some thoughtless owners also allow their often boisterous pets to roam free, causing anxiety and disress to others in the close vicinity.

Once again I appeal to ALL dog owners to ALWAYS pick up after their pets and to keep them firmly under control on a lead when near other people, who may perhaps be intimidated by them.

Senior Residents There are two articles in this edition about senior male residents who have both achieved a venerable age.

Firstly, on page 13, Richard Leach recently attained the age of 100, followed by Harold Byrne, aged 94, whose life story begins on page 62. Well done lads!

The Beautiful Game Football lovers will be interested to read about two young local entrepreneurs who have got together to create what they hope will be the source for information about the game for both players and spectators.

Brett Towler, himself a young Nettleham resident, writes about the progress and future aspirations of his friends on page 67 of this edition.

Sincere Condolences It was with great sadness that I learned of the death of David Fenwick early in the New Year and I would like to take this opportunity to offer, on behalf of both myself and readers of the magazine, our sincere condolences to his family and friends on their sad loss.

David, who had been a Nettleham News distributor for a number of years, will also be remembered by many readers for his regular contributions to the Poetry Page in the magazine (see page 72).

His last few days were spent in Lincoln County Hospital where he appreciated being looked after so well whilst awaiting heart bypass surgery.

David is fondly remembered on page 15.

And just as the magazine is going to press, I hear the sad news that Stephen Newton, fellow-director with his bother Andrew, of Cupit Print in Horncastle, has also sadly died. I have known Stephen for many years as Cupits have printed every edition of Nettleham News since the very first one in the spring of 1983 - 31 years ago!

My sincere condolences and sympathy to his family, friends and colleagues.

Material for Nettleham News Please remember, when sending text via email for publication in Nettleham News, to attach it as a simple Word document (ending in .doc) If it has been created using later software and ends in .docx unfortunately, due to my rather old computer operating system, I am unable to open and use it.

Better still, include the text actually in the body of the email, from where I can easily and quickly copy and paste the wording straight into the magazine without opening a separate attachment.

Images, though, should be sent separately, attached as individual jpg files.

The views and opinions expressed in Nettleham News magazine are not necessarily those of the Editor.

Where photographs and/or names of children are published in this magazine, it is assumed that prior permission has been gained from parents/school.

Nettleham News is designed, edited, originated and published by Nigel Kingston, 1 High Street, Nettleham, Lincoln LN2 2PL. Design copyright © Nigel Kingston.

All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under design copyright above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise), without the prior permission of the publisher.

Printed by F W Cupit Printers Limited, Horncastle.

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Directory of Advertisers This magazine is funded solely by the revenue from advertisements and readers are urged to support these businesses whenever possible. Please mention Nettleham News when responding to advertisements.

Acceptance of advertisements does not imply any endorsement by Nettleham News and those responding to the advertisements are responsible for confirming the quality and suitability of the products and services offered.

It is the advertisers’ responsibility to ensure that their material does not contravene advertising standards or any Act of Parliament.

IFC: inside front cover; IBC: inside back cover; BC: back cover

ACCOMMODATION

HEARING AID SERVICES

ESTATE AGENTS

The Old Vicarage

06

Mundys

IFC

Hayman’s Ghyll

BC

Harrison

14

ACCOUNTANCY SERVICES S C Warren & Co

10

IFC

42

20

BC

Aspects of Beauty

08

The Beauty Rooms

26

BUILDING SERVICES 04

18

FLORISTS

IFC

FOOTCARE SERVICES Amble Down

10

JES Footcare

28

The Old School

06

WEH Property Services

26

Nettleham Village Hall

18

Fairclear Construction

40

Listers

40

CAFE The Tea Cosy CAKE CREATION Fiona Milnes: Cakes by Design

30

42

Lincolnshire Co-operative

30

Castle Garage Doors

40

16

Lincs Landscape Co

06

P Westman Landscapes

08

PUBLIC TRANSPORT OPTIONS 06

Lincolnshire County Council

Sills & Betteridge

24

RESIDENTIAL CARE HOMES

JGQC Solicitors

34

St Luke’s Nursing Home

12

Dale & Co

40

Willan House

28

Wilkin Chapman

42

Andrew & Co

56

Robin Taylor

12

Lynn Williams

26

10 42

COMPUTER SERVICES 26

06

ScandiGifts

40

Maxine

24

The Cheese Society

22

GUITAR TUITION

Danielle Rawlinson

28

Kirk Stephenson

DOMESTIC SERVICES

10

Nettleham Tennis Club

Roy Wilson Auto Services

22

STONEMASONRY

08

SUPERMARKET & POST OFFICE

10

Lincolnshire Co-operative

Holmes & Fields

22 Your Cars Private Hire

Imp Travel

PICTURE FRAMING SERVICE David Sunderland

18

PLASTERING Nettleham Plastering

BC

42

26

22

Mark Cropper

24 26

PLUMBING & HEATING SERVICES

28

Trevor Lawrence

04

WINDOWS & CONSERVATORIES

D White

08

CRB Installations

30

Paul Strong Limited

10

Andy Yates

40

Apex Plumbing

12

Gas Wise

18

HANDYMAN/HOME MAINTENANCE

Glyn Rudd Plumbing

22

Larry Jackson

24

Helping Hands

22

Rowmac Plumbing

24

Nettleham Handyman

24

J Curtis

34

PRE-SCHOOLS

Tai Chi

24

Beckside Pre-School

08

Wellbeing Fitness

54

Stepping Stones

12

2

IFC

Tip Top Tree Service

Wainwright Forestry

12

HEALTH & FITNESS

Sara Bright

Alberi Tree Services

Neil Bark

12

30

18

22

Nock Electrical

22

TRAVEL AGENTS

Margaret’s

ELECTRICAL SERVICES

IBC

30

DOMESTIC APPLIANCE SERVICES

28

24

Graham Hill

20

David Fenton

20

S J Skepper

Salon Rouge

DRIVING TUITION

IFC

Paul Booth

PHARMACY SERVICES

HAIR STYLISTS 08

16

SPORTS CLUBS

Lincoln MOT Centre

Taylors of Welton

GOLF CENTRES

Susan Gaisford

SKIP HIRE SERVICES

TREE & HEDGE SERVICES

Troika

Welton Manor Golf Centre

DANCING CLASSES

42

SPECIALITY FOODS

GIFTWARE 10

08

N B Reid

18

Lincolnshire Co-operative

CLEANING SERVICES

Simon J Humphreys

TAXI SERVICES

GARDEN CENTRES & NURSERIES Scothern Nurseries

28

34

ROOFING SERVICES

Niki Clarke

PET SERVICES & SUPPLIES Rudies Roots

Pepperpots Domestic Services

56

22

PAINTING & DECORATING

22

TL Chimney Sweep Services

The PC Stop (John White)

Paul Dales

MOTORING SERVICES

16

CHIMNEY SWEEPING SERVICES

Allan Cotterill

06

The White Hart

Handy Tip

GARDEN SERVICES

CHIROPODIST SERVICES Mandy Spring

The Black Horse

GARAGE DOOR SERVICES

CHILDREN’S SERVICES Jo Jingles

Jonathan Whiting

Edward W Crowther Ltd

LAWNMOWER SERVICES

MOBILE HAIRSTYLIST

FUNERAL SERVICES

FURNITURE & SOFT FURNISHINGS 56

40

IFC

MATHS/ENGLISH TUITION

FUNCTION VENUES

Your Home

The Plough Inn

Page Nelson

FOOD DELIVERY SERVICES

BC

PUBLIC HOUSES 56

LEGAL SERVICES 30

L&J Construction & Maintenance 22

BUILDING SUPPLIES & TIMBER

Louby Lou Wools

Cupit Print PROPERTY LETTING SERVICES

30

KNITTING WOOLS

FINANCIAL SERVICES

Wiltshire Farm Foods

BEAUTY SALONS

M J Spencer & Sons

David Burghardt

Flowers by Design

BATHROOMS Elixir Bathrooms

16

Thompson & Richardson

AUDIO/VISUAL SERVICES Lincoln Audio/Visual

Secure Homes Limited

Clearview Opticians

PRINTING SERVICES 14

HOME SECURITY

EYECARE SERVICES

ANTIQUES Hemswell Antique Centres

Claire Armitage

Please remember to mention Nettleham News when responding to advertisements

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Nettleham Noticeboard If your local group or organisation is staging an event, use these free spaces to let everyone know

Nettleham Art Group

ANNUAL PARISH MEETING

10th Annual Art Exhibition and Sale of Paintings

The Large Hall, The Old School

The Old School, Nettleham

Wednesday 9 April 2014

Friday 11 July 2.00 - 4.00pm & 6.30 - 8.00pm Saturday 12 July 10.00am - 4.30pm Sunday 13 July 11.00am - 3.30pm

The Annual Parish Meeting will take place in on

commencing at 7.30pm under the Chairmanship of Cllr Terry Williams, Chairman of Nettleham Parish Council

For further information please contact

Presentation of the first Ray Sellars Community Award

Ian Straw Telephone 753558

All residents are welcome to attend

SHOEBOX COFFEE MORNING Friday 28 March

FRIENDS OF ST GERMAIN’S present

Lincoln Orpheus Male Voice Choir

THE SPICE OF LIFE! St Germain’s Church, Scothern Saturday 10 May 2014 7.30pm

Nettleham Ladies’ Club

SPRING FAYRE

Saturday 10 May 2.30pm in the Village Hall Proceeds to HELP FOR HEROES BARGAINS GALORE! Do come and support this event stalls, competitions, teas and much, much more

FUNDRAISING FOR SIGHT SAVERS EGGSTRA SPECIAL Coffee Morning Saturday 12 April

10.00am - 12.00 noon

with special guest appearance by FUSION+

10.00am - 12.00 noon

at

Tickets £10.00 in advance (to include a glass of wine and nibbles)

at The Old School Nettleham

Church View Nettleham Everyone welcome

Interval raffle Tickets available from

Jan Kenworthy Telephone 01673 861345

All the usual stalls, raffle, etc, and not forgetting our delicious tea or coffee

(see also page 51)

Everyone welcome

MIXED PALETTE

AGE UK

LIBRARY THEATRE TOURING COMPANY present

ART EXHIBITION

Nettleham AGM 26 All Saints Lane Tuesday 15 April 2.30pm

LINCOLN CATHEDRAL CHAPTER HOUSE

(3.00pm 8 May)

New members would be welcome, to enable us to ensure that the running of this organisation continues to offer the services of Tuesday Coffee Morning, Nettleham Forget Me Not Club and Luncheon Club for the future

Sunday 2.00pm - 4.00pm

If you are able to help please come

Monday 28 April to Saturday 10 May 10.00am - 4.00pm

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The Kingfisher A romantic comedy by William Douglas Home

Nettleham Village Hall Saturday 5 April 7.30pm Entrance: £6.00 Light refreshments and raffle

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TREVOR LAWRENCE PLUMBING AND CENTRAL HEATING GAS SAFE Registered gas installer Central heating installations, boiler change and servicing.

Bathroom and shower installations Tiling: wall and floors

KITCHEN INSTALLATIONS & SMALL BUILDING ALTERATIONS Free estimates and advice 2 Orchard Way Nettleham GAS

safe REGISTER

Telephone 01522 750146

UNVENTED HOT WATER

M J SPENCER & SONS (NETTLEHAM) LTD Builders & Contractors 22 BECKSIDE, NETTLEHAM, LINCOLN LN2 2PH FOR A

COMPLETE BUILDING SERVICE TELEPHONE 01522 806919 MOBILE 07887 855921 or 07789 406660

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Parish Council News Welcome to the latest update on Nettleham Parish Council business Nettleham Library As you may know, Lincolnshire County Council have decided to implement their proposed public library closure programme and Nettleham Library will cease operating in its current form at the end of March 2015.

The Chairman of the Parish Council has written a separate article (see page 19) outlining the current situation.

We would urge residents to read this and then come to the Special Parish Council meeting on 19 March to voice your opinions, as a final decision will be made at that meeting on whether we can go forward with the proposals, or have to leave it to other interested parties to take on the responsibility.

Bishops Palace Concerns were raised in the last edition of Nettleham News regarding dog fouling in this new amenity area of the village and the Parish Council already had this under review. It is so very disappointing that a few irresponsible dog owners are letting the village down in this way. The Parish Council is reluctant to take a heavy-handed approach immediately and agreed at its January council meeting to appeal to those people exercising dogs at Bishop’s Palace to keep them on a lead and to clear up after them. Additional signage will be put in place and there are already bins at both entrances.

If there is no improvement, then we will have no alternative but to ban dogs from the site altogether. Further details on the Bishop’s Palace site can be found in a separate item by Councillor John Evans (see page 55).

Bishop’s Palace Official Opening Ceremony On a happier note, we are delighted to announce that HRH The Duke of Kent is expected to attend the official opening of Bishop’s Palace on Tuesday 11 March 2014. The first Prince of

Nettleham Parish Council The Old School Mill Hill Nettleham Lincoln LN2 2PE Telephone/fax 01522 750011 Email: parishcouncil@nettleham.info www.nettleham.info

Nominations should be submitted to the Clerk by Monday 24 March 2014 (contact details shown alongside).

Village Walk The village walk held in December 2013 was a great success with over 30 people turning out on a lovely sunny day to walk off any Christmas excesses! Many thanks to Sara Bright of the Fieldpaths Committee for leading the walk and Cllr Susan Harland for providing some welcome refreshments (see centre pages 36/37).

Parish Council Precept At the December Parish Council meeting, the Parish Precept for 2014/15 was set at £119,351. This is an increase of £2,715 or approximately 2.4% which is in line with the current inflation rate.

Parish Office Open Monday - Thursday 9.00am - 12.30pm

Wales was created at Nettleham in 1301 and to have a member of the royal family in attendance at the official opening is a great honour and a tribute to all the hard work put in by village residents and associated organisations and, particularly, Cllr John Evans and Julia Finn of the Parish Council, to bring this unique historical site into public use.

The Ray Sellars Community Award Following the sudden death of Cllr Ray Sellars in 2012 the Parish Council wished to celebrate and acknowledge all his hard work for Nettleham. It was agreed that a Ray Sellars Community Award be created.

The award is for people who have contributed to the community and nominations are requested from residents. The nominations will then be considered and the winner will be presented with a special shield at the Annual Parish meeting on Wednesday 9 April 2014.

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Parish Council Grants We would like to advise village groups who may not be aware that the Parish Council has a small budget available for grants where additional funding would be helpful. Please contact the Clerk for an application form.

Village Benches There are currently 50 benches in the village of various age, style and condition. There is some cost to the Parish Council in maintaining them, but to replace unrepairable benches can cost up to £500, which is a considerable amount to spend when there may be higher priorities.

With so many seats available, we think it might be appropriate to remove older benches as and when they become too expensive to repair.

Seats made from recyclable materials can look indistinguishable from wood, are considerably cheaper to buy and are maintenance free.

If an individual resident, or village group, is interested in donating such a replacement in the future, we would be very pleased to hear from you, particularly where a bench may be lost from a popular location. continued on page 7

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LINCS LANDSCAPE CO

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Self-catering Holiday Cottages

Horticultural Contractors ● Contractors for all horticultural advice ● Suppliers of all trees, shrubs, plants & seeds ● All estimates Free

Nettleham, Lincoln

David Storey FRHS

Delightful cottages within easy walking distance of the Village Green.

Offering well-equipped accommodation with garden and off-road parking Weekends, weeks and longer-term lets available

CG Certs in Horticulture

Cherry Willingham, Lincoln LN3 4AN

English Tourism Council

Telephone: 751325 Mobile: 07754 778361 Email: storey-david@btconnect.com www.lincs-landscape.co.uk

TROIKA CARDS & GIFTS Greeting cards, Gifts, Jewellery and Toys

The Green, Nettleham

LINCOLN 751164 House Signs

English Tourism Council

For more details contact

Self Catering Accommodation

Susan Downs Telephone 01522 750819 Email: susan@oldvic.net Website: www.oldvic.net

Self Catering Accommodation

A friendly and local firm of solicitors providing: ● ● ●

Conveyancing - at a low cost fixed fee Probate - a sensitive and efficient service Wills - a personal approach with reduced rates for all Nettleham News readers

Victory House, Henley Way, Doddington Road, Lincoln LN6 3QR Telephone (01522) 687500 Fax (01522) 690296 Free car parking available enquiries@pagenelson.co.uk www.pagenelson.co.uk for appointments

Regulated by the Solicitors Regulation Authority

The Old School Owned by Nettleham Parish Council Suitable for meetings, parties, receptions, events, exhibitions, etc Competitive Hire Charges

Telephone/fax: 01522 750011 Email: parishcouncil@nettleham.info www.nettleham.info

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continued from page 5

Parish Council News Multi-Use Games Area The Parish Council has agreed to provide a multi-use games area to one of the public tennis courts at Mulsanne Park.

The games area will include the provision of a ‘Games Board’ and score board mounted on an existing fence, plus two basketball hoops and markings for basketball area. The area can also still be used for tennis.

PARISH COUNCIL MEETINGS

©

Meetings commence at 7.30pm and all are open to the general public (all at The Old School unless otherwise stated)

2014

Parish Council Meeting Tuesday 18 March 2014

Extraordinary Parish Council Meeting Wednesday 19 March 2014

Annual Parish Council Meeting

Cemetery Fees Cemetery fees will be increased from 1 April 2014. A 5% increase has been made in order to meet the associated maintenance costs.

Wednesday 9 April 2014

Further details are available at the Parish Office, or on the Parish website.

Mulsanne Park Users’ Committee

Nettleham Parish Council

Dates correct at the time of going to press

Property Committee Monday 24 March 2014 Tuesday 6 May 2014 (at Mulsanne Park)

Monday 3 March 2014

Nettleham Carnival Saturday 12 July Put it in your diary now!

Nettleham Village Green from 1.00pm Don’t miss this popular annual village event

Historic Photographs of Nettleham Readers of the magazine who collect old photographs of the village may wish to add this photograph of Nettleham Library to their collection now, as it may very soon disappear from our village scene.

Due to cutbacks in local authority funding, Lincolnshire County Council has resolved to close several libraries, of which Nettleham is one, so this familiar scene in Cross Street could become a thing of the past.

If you think that Nettleham library should remain open, then be sure to be there at the Special Parish Council Meeting in the Large Hall at the Old School on Wednesday 19 March 2014, commencing at 7.30pm.

Nettleham Library on Cross Street (see page 19 for more information about the proposed closure of this village amenity)

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Simon J Humphreys Specialist in built-up felt roofing 8 Sudbrooke Lane Nettleham

Telephone 01522 751561 Mobile: 07905 092174

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P WESTMAN LANDSCAPES Garden Design, Pruning, Turfing, Fencing, Tree Surgery, Patios, Hedging

FREE ESTIMATES GIVEN Telephone Philip Westman Ash Tree House 25 Eastfield Lane Welton Lincoln LN2 3NA

01673 866660

D WHITE PLUMBING SERVICES 30 years experience Bathroom design, supply and installation Level access/wet rooms Showers and shower repairs Wall and floor tiling All types of plumbing repairs No job too small and no call-out charge

01522 690554 55 Meadowlake Crescent Lincoln LN6 0HZ

REGISTERED PLUMBER

S J SKEPPER Interior & Exterior Painter & Decorator 1 Vicarage Lane, Nettleham, Lincoln LN2 2RH

City & Guilds Holder

01522 754902

For free estimates telephone

WELTON 01673 861443

When you want to look your best, trust us to take care of all your beauty needs

Mobile telephone: 07930 227414 3 Ridge Close, Welton

PEPPERPOT’S

DOMESTIC SERVICES Regular Cleans Laundry & Ironing Service Spring & Builder Cleans Windows & Carpets Cleaned House Moves

Find us on

Facebook

TELEPHONE

01673 857691 Our salon is qualified to specialise in

Mobile: 07947 322023 LANGTON-BY-WRAGBY, MARKET RASEN pepperpotscleaning@btinternet.com

Beckside Pre-School Early Years Unit, All Saints Lane, Nettleham For children 2 to 5 OFSTED Registered

Monday - Friday 9.00am - 3.00pm Come and see us learning through play

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Semi-permanent Make-up ● Laser Hair Removal ● Laser Skin Rejuvenation ● Laser Vascular Treatments ● Advanced Cosmetic Procedures ● Electrolysis ● Derma-Roller ● Injectables

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Guinot Skincare ● Priori ● Aromatherapy Associates ● Bare Minerals ● Hopi Ear Candles ● Jessica Nails ● Jessica Gel Overlays

Call now to book a free consultation or an appointment

Telephone: 07940 873505

Visit our website

Email: becksidenettleham@googlemail.com

aspectsofbeautylincoln.co.uk

Helen Kendall and Jayne Ellis

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Letters from Readers More readers’ letters on page 11

From Margaret in Watford I found a few items in ‘Reader’s Letters’ to agree with in the winter 2013 edition of Nettleham News.

I read the letters on page 9 about dogs’ ‘calling cards’ being left in the middle of the footpath at the Bishop’s Palace site and mess being left just anywhere. I so agree with both writers and, as a pedestrian myself, now find it a growing problem here too. Dog faeces, cars parked with four wheels on the pavement, grown-ups (who should know better!) and children flying by on bicycles all make for a hazardous walk, especially for the elderly.

Joan Foreman on page 11 asks if it bothers anyone about the apostrophe missing from the sign on the Bishop’s Palace site gate.

Yes Joan, it does bother me! Too many things are slap-dash these days!

On a lighter and brighter note, what delighful pictures of the children fishing on page 13. I am delighted that Lyn and Colin Dallas read my letter in the autumn edition of the magazine and are showing their grandchildren some good old-fashioned pastimes.

Like yours truly, Denise Jones of Harrogate writes on page 13 that she enjoys Nettleham News so much and passes it on - and on! We have no magazine to equal it here in Watford!

So it just remains for me once again to congratulate all concerned for winning the Best Kept Village competition again. Well done Nettleham!

Margaret Waggett Editor Once again Margaret, thank you so much for your kind words about our village and also about Nettleham News.

We are proud and privileged to live in such an attractive place and do our best to keep it looking neat, clean and tidy.

Thank You T Lawson Dulux Select Painter & Decorator As I am now retiring, I would like to thank all my past customers for using my services over the past 35 years.

Thank you and wishing you all well T Lawson Editor And thank you for advertising in Nettleham News for so many years - may you enjoy many years of happy retirement in the future.

Via email 4 December 2013

Resulting Help Thank you for including the feature on Lincolnshire Home Improvement Agency on pages 48/49 in the winter 2013 edition of Nettleham News.

I think the article looks excellent. We have already received one call as a result and it seems that we can help the lady.

The rest of the publication, as ever, is excellent too with a real varied spread of articles.

Mick King Agency Director Editor Thank you for your kind words about the magazine and I’m so pleased that as a result of the article in the last edition of Nettleham News you were able to help one of our lady readers.

Via email 23 December 2013

Dog Ban on the Bishop’s Palace Site?

I absolutely and wholeheartedly agree with the content of Allen Page’s letter published in the winter edition of Nettleham News.

When eagerly exploring the historic ‘Bishop’s Palace’ site, to be confronted with disgusting piles of dog faeces every other minute, in a village renowned for winning awards, is truly deplorable, to say the least.

I anticipated taking my four grandchildren on an ‘educational’ walk in this area, but have sadly deferred such a visit until action is taken against irresponsible dog owners and a regulation brought in to ban dogs entirely from the site.

However, dog faeces is only my secondary concern! Whilst recently travelling upstairs on the Stagecoach bus, it came to a halt in a queue of traffic adjacent to the ‘Bishop’s Palace’ site, when my husband and I were appalled to clearly witness a rotweiller bounding back and forth on the site, no leash and the dog’s owner nonchalantly gazing at the sky! If small children had been present, the potential danger is obvious.

So let’s not be apathetic regarding this issue; our children’s, grandchildren’s and future generations’ health, well-being and education are paramount - it would appear that the only satisfactory solution, as Allen pointed out, is to impose a total ban without further delay.

Sincere Thanks Whilst shopping in the Co-op store on New Year’s Eve, I lost my purse and, through the pages of Nettleham News, I would like sincerely to thank the kind gentleman who found it and handed it in.

I am extremely grateful to him.

Olive Finch (Nettleham resident) Editor It gives me great pleasure to include a letter of this nature in the magazine, serving as an excellent example of the strong community spirit which we have in Nettleham, restoring our faith in humanity and also providing proof (if it were needed!) that honsesty is still alive and well in our midst.

Via email 6 December 2013

Thank You May I extend a sincere thank you to the kind person who left a box of apples in Church View for the residents.

It was a very thoughtful gesture and much appreciated.

A Resident Via email 17 December 2013

Parking in the Village I refer to the plans which appeared on the centre pages 36/37 of the winter edition of Nettleham News regarding parking in the village.

The proposed yellow lines do not appear to address the constant anti-social parking at the end of All Saints Lane adjacent to the pubs. During the day it is caused at least partly by inconsiderate patrons of the school, at night by inconsiderate patrons of the pubs.

Some say it is just the way people are these days and we should get used to it, I do not subscribe to this view.

I think there should be yellow lines proposed on the corners included by Chapel Lane and All Saints Lane.

It is obvious that the irresponsible parkers realise they are causing a problem, because they often park on the footpath, blocking access for elderly and disabled residents of Church View and All Saints Lane.

Rachael Goy

These vulnerable senior citizens should not have to walk in the road because of other’s arrogance (and it is not acceptable that local businesses should make profit from the abrogation of other people’s rights to a safe and civilised existence).

Editor: See also page 55

Dave

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Letters from Readers More readers’ letters on page 21

Via email 4 December 2013 (in response to a letter from the Editor on page 13 of the winter 2013 edition of Netteham News)

Intrusive Aircraft Noise How refreshing and, in a strange way comforting, to know that there is at least one other person who is tormented by the endless droning of the aircraft in the skies overhead. I thought it was just me!

RAF Waddington did tell me from which base the aircraft was controlled, but I am unable to find the email. My memory is that it was RAF Hullavington in Wiltshire, but I know that it has closed and is now, I believe, used by the Army.

A ‘friend’ pointed out the noise two or three years ago and asked if I knew what the aircraft was doing. I have to confess that, until then I had not been very aware of it. From then on, it seems never to have ceased!

I am writing this on the 4 December in the kitchen, which has double-glazed windows and my writing is accompanied by the varied, but continuous, droning.

I have mentioned this to a few others.

Some can hear it when it is pointed out, but then seem to be able to forget it almost immediately: others are just not aware. ‘Tis the sensitive who are affected!

In an attempt to find out more, on the basis that if I knew it was doing something of national importance, I might find it easier to accept, I sent an email to the PR section at RAF Waddington to see if they could enlighten me. It must be at least two, maybe three years ago, in early December. The explanation received was along the lines that the aircraft was nothing to do with RAF Waddington, but they understood that it was involved in training (they did not say what training!).

I just wanted to let you know that it makes me feel much better to know that I am not the only one who is unable to shut out the interference. Thank you.

Thank you also for such an excellent village magazine. Nettleham News is attractive, full of interest and also a very useful source of reference. The only downside to the winter 2013 edition is the fiendishly difficult crossword or, more accurately, the two-word anagram. Actually, I am thoroughly enjoying the challenge and my entry will follow shortly.

They went on to say that they understood that the flights would be ceasing about a week before Christmas and would be resuming in January. This they did and with the exception of a few breaks, seem to have continued ever since.

Peter Currey Editor I was particularly pleased to receive Peter’s email and know that I am not the only one to be aware of that aircraft noise and yes - you can still hear it through double glazed windows! We must have very sensitive hearing - but it’s no consolation and it still drives me mad! I’m sure the training is of great importance to someone somewhere, but as I said before in the winter 2013 edition, why on earth can’t they go out over the North Sea and do it it would take only a few minutes to fly there at the start of the exercise.

Failing that, if the training simply must take place over land, then please go to an alternative less-populated area (over the Fens or around The Wash) and remove this intrusive and irritating noise pollution from the skies over the densely populated city of Lincoln and its neighbouring village of Nettleham!

Via email 31 December 2013

Winter Bloomer!

It’s 31 December and this rhododendron at the bottom our garden is in full bloom.

A good omen for the weather to come, or a reminder that 2013 was not so bad?!

Cathy Platt

Childhood Memory In September 1933, at 5 years old, I started school at Nettleham Infants, taken for 9.00am by my mother.

In those days we didn’t have paper, just a slate in a wooden frame and using a stick of white chalk to write or draw.

I came home for my lunch and mother asked me if I liked school. I said it was OK. She asked me what I did and I said I had done a drawing. She asked what I had drawn and I replied “I did a drawing of a man peeing in a bucket.” She was quite shocked and replied “You mustn’t do things like that!”

I think this was the beginning of my artistic career. At 14+ I went to Lincoln Art School and later enjoyed a career in advertising, eventually having my own business and employing 12 people.

Should any other reader wish to register a complaint against this persistent aircraft noise in the coming months, the contact details are:

C R Warwick

By post: Low Flying Complaints and Enquiries Unit, RAF Wittering, Peterborough, Cambridge PE8 6HB Email: CAS-lowflying@mod.uk Website: www.gov.low-flying-in-your-area

Editor Do any other readers have their own amusing childhood memories which they would like to share with readers of the magazine?

It is important that specific dates/duration times of the distressing noise are recorded in order that the individual aircraft and its point of origin can be identified Some readers may be thinking: “Why not simply wear industrial ear-guards, ear-plugs or earphones?”

The simple answer is that when I go out into the garden, I would like to hear the birds singing, insects humming and the wind in the trees! Is this too much to expect?

A Big Thank You

I am a newcomer to the village of Nettleham and would like to join in with anyone who plays, or would like to play, Canasta.

Thank you to Betty Pape and her team of helpers for holding the jumble sale on the 1 February at The Scout Hut, in aid of fundraising for Nettleham Skate Park.

It was a highly sucessful day and we raised a total of £669.27.

Mrs H Hughes 7 The Barn, The Green, Nettleham

A big thank you to everyone who donated jumble and attended on the day.

Telephone: 01522 244094

Cheryl & Ben Tate

Anyone for Canasta?

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Recognition for Colin in the West Lindsey Community Awards A well-known face to many Nettleham residents was recently presented with a special award in recognition of his services to the local community.

Colin Dallas has driven the PC Coaches service between Nettleham and Lincoln for over 40 years and is a familiar and friendly face to many Nettleham residents as he gives them a cheery welcome aboard his bus when they go into town shopping.

Passengers enjoy his friendly banter and he never fails to greet residents with a broad smile, frequently offering a helping hand to them as they climb aboard.

Colin was nominated as a candidate for the award by Nettleham Parish Council and on 5 December 2013 at the Guildhall, Gainsborough, Colin Dallas received a framed certificate of recognition for his valuable contribution to the community of Nettleham over many years.

Congratulations Colin - if ever an award was well-deserved, this is it!

West Lindsey District Councillor Giles McNeill presents the special community award to Colin Dallas Photograph by Malcolm Leaning

Richard Achieves 100!

Adapted from an article in the Lincolnshire Echo kindly sent in by his niece Christine Edison (nee Kinder) which contained live ammunition, blowing a hole in the ceiling!

Richard Leach, resident of Dunholme village, celebrated his 100th birthday on 15 December 2013 with a special party for family and friends in Dunholme Old School.

He attributes his longevity to a lifetime spent outdoors and in close contact with nature. This passion for growing things has stayed with him throughout his life and Richard continued to lovingly tend his garden until well into his eighties and commends it as a way of staying fit and healthy.

He received the traditional telegram from the Queen and recalled a working life on farms in the county of Lincolnshire.

His family moved to Nettleham following the death of his father in the First World War, and Richard began his life of working on the land by helping out on local farms.

“I was very fit throughout my life” says Richard “and I continue to be quite fit now. I used to do some horse-riding when I was younger, but I was never particularly interested in cricket or football.

He also gained an HGV driving licence and when the Second World War broke out in 1939, he was exempt from military service, as HGV drivers were designated as a ‘reserved occupation’.

Although he wasn’t involved in active service during the war, he, together with a number of other Dunholme residents, volunteered to serve with the Home Guard in the village.

He has a few fond memories of those days when, with four Home Guards on duty at a time in the village, two of them would

have forty winks in the chapel school room, whilst the other pair patrolled the locality, eventually swapping places to take their turn in having a nap!

He also remembers the night when one of his Home Guard comrades, startled by the sudden appearance of Richard and his friend, accidentally discharged his gun 13

“Although I’m still quite fit now, my legs aren’t as good as they once were, which imposes limitations on my activities.

“It was nice to receive a telegram from the Queen.”

Our congratulations to Richard on reaching this venerable age and as his niece Christine observed: “Uncle Dick is still going strong and looks amazing for his age!”

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David was a well-known gentleman in Nettleham. He was born 6 September 1941 and was baptised at Nettleham Village Methodist Church. His mother attended the church all her life until she was elderly, as did her mother before her. His father was frequently away from home in the RAF during the war, when David was a child. As a young boy, many happy hours were spent playing in the woods and fields in and around Nettleham.

As a child he lived with his parents and sister, Ruth, in a cottage near to where the Village Hall now stands. They moved to a council house and then to a bungalow on Scothern Road. He attended Nettleham Junior School and then De Aston Grammar School at Market Rasen. He was an athlete and set a record for long jump at school.

He trained to be a teacher at Stoke Rochford and Loughborough and went on to teach at St Clements Junior School in Waddington until his early retirement in 1992.

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David John Fenwick 1941-2014

by Ruth Peart (sister to David)

He had a daughter, Amanda. He then met and married Veronica in 1988 and became a father to her daughters, Louise and Sally. In 1986 they bought a house and moved back to Nettleham and he has lived here ever since. He delighted in his grandchildren Adam, Abigail, Christopher and Rosie.

David gained three degrees on an Open University course and attained a BA Hons in 2002. He loved spending time on his village allotment and going for long walks in the countryside. He had a great love of wildlife.

He sadly lost Veronica in 2009 and missed her terribly. More recently he met and became engaged to Maureen who says what a kind and caring man he was.

He loved Nettleham and wrote many poems about the village and his childhood.

He was a regular contributor of poetry in Nettleham News and has written more than 500 poems, publishing 55 of them in a book to raise money for Nettleham Infant School.

David had many friends in the village and had a good sense of humour. He was a lifelong supporter of Lincoln City Football Club.

David will be greatly missed by all his family and friends.

My Childhood in Nettleham during the 1940s In my far-distant childhood days, We made our fun in simple ways.

Through wood and field we’d roam at will, Free of restraint, with knocks and spills.

We searched for conkers and berries And found touchwood in willow trees.

The village fulfilled all our needs, As we built dens and did brave deeds.

Its leafy haunts and warrened hills, Provided us with simple thrills.

One of the wildest places lay, Where the police field lies today.

This quarry on a massive site, Provided us with great delight.

It must have been forty feet deep, With three steep walls up which we’d creep.

Huge pools covered part of its ground, And here leeches and newts were found.

There were two mounds like volcanoes, Up which we climbed as though heroes.

On their flanks were piles of barbed-wire, That hid brown rats, at which we’d fire.

The nearby service camps dumped here And we uncovered souvenirs.

The Parish Pit on Washdyke Lane, Was a place where we searched in vain, For buried treasure, but we found, Large fossils in the rock-strewn ground.

To Booth’s Quarry, we’d often stray, Where Cliff Avenue stands today.

We braved its two sheer walls with glee, And fell, without too much injury.

The Church Wood was a gloomy place, With fruit trees taking up much space.

Here Mr Bowskill had two sheds, One selling fruit, one with a bed.

He lived there during warmer days, And we admired his Spartan ways.

We roamed along the eastward stream; And acted out many a dream.

There were fresh springs and hollow trees, And stepping-stones to cross with ease.

You could walk for long miles and see, No dwellings or activity.

Just rabbits, hares and types of vole; A paradise for a young soul.

We dammed the beck and caused a flood, All the way down to Mansford’s Wood.

We built a cave on old Booth’s field, But we were caught and had to yield Our spades and forks, to the harsh one, Who met our parents, later on.

We frequently explored The Park, To find the tunnel long and dark.

Which was supposed to run from there, To the Cathedral area.

Young Southward found a stone-lined hole And scarcely told a living soul.

But he was caught, and there and then, He had to fill it in again.

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We sledged in the Park, near Mill Hill, And also, where a pump lies still.

The hollow was just made for tykes, For here we’d race our carts and bikes.

There were two ponds in which we’d play, The tree-lined one, remains today.

We attended the Sunday School, At the chapel and kept its rules.

Both Messrs Baker and Mansford, Taught us all well, and afterward, Would give us pictures and booklets, Of Christian work and its outlets.

We pulled a cart with an organ, Which proved to be quite a burden.

Norman Bowskill played hymns with flair, Whilst our voices rang through the air.

We sang loudly along the streets, Then received biscuits and choice sweets.

Later we raced around The Park, Until it grew too cold and dark.

We children wandered everywhere, Quite happily, without a care.

When I look back to those fine days, It never ceases to amaze; That though we had few games and toys, Our fun was richer and our joys.

For we created wonderlands, That few today, would understand.

Our village gave us happy days, And in my case, will always.

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Sponsored Dog Walk I would like to tell you about the sponsored dog walk that I organised to raise money for the people in the Philippines affected by the terrible Typhoon Haiyan.

I first heard about the disaster when Miss Windley, our year 4 teacher at Nettleham Junior School told us how it had destroyed towns and villages and left many children without parents and no homes to live in.

I decided to organise a sponsored dog walk, as I have two dogs and my family also are dog owners, to raise money for this good cause.

The walk took place on the 30 November, we met at the Green and started walking through the village.

The following people and dogs joined in: Holly Thompson (me) and Rosco (a cheeky border terrier) from Nettleham Ben Thompson and Chewbacca (Husky) from Nettleham Clare Thompson from Nettleham Lee Thompson from Nettleham Sue Thompson with Evie and Freddie (Jack Russells) from Nettleham Tracey Bennett with Oscar (Golden Retriever) from Ingham Rachel Davis with Reggie (Border Terrier) from Coningsby

We walked continuously for a total of two hours around Nettleham, covering about five miles in all.

The dogs were all very well behaved (apart from when Reggie the Border Terrier went to the toilet on my mum’s washing!) and everyone enjoyed being out in the winter sunshine.

We raised a whopping total of ÂŁ174.04, which will buy 12 tarpaulins, 6 hygiene kits and 2 jerry cans that can store up to 20 litres of water for families that have lost their homes.

I would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone who sponsored us and contributed to the total raised.

by Holly Thompson (age 9)

Being a Responsible Dog Owner The photograph above illustrates how dogs and their owners enjoy company and getting out into the great outdoors together, but recently there have been a number of complaints about the behaviour of dog owners around the village in not clearing up after their pets and also allowing them to indulge in boisterous activity when close to other adults and children who perhaps are apprehensive about dogs, particularly the larger breeds, which may frighten them and be perceived to pose a danger to youngsters.

ALL dog owners - please ensure that you ALWAYS clean up after your pet and ALWAYS keep it under strict control in public places.

Ensure that Nettleham leads the way in responsible dog ownership!

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DO YOU WANT TO SAVE OUR LIBRARY? Background As no doubt many residents will already be aware, Lincolnshire County Council (LCC) has decided - as part of its cost-cutting programme - to close Nettleham Library on the 31 March 2015.

This was despite strong opposition from the Parish Council (see page 32 in the last edition of Nettleham News).

However, the Parish Council also took the precautionary step to lodge an “Expression of Interest” with LCC. This was to the effect that the Parish Council would be willing to explore the possibility of establishing a Parish Council-led Community Library, operating from the existing library building.

However this is subject to two important factors, namely (A) LCC agreeing to provide adequate financial or other support and (B) sufficient numbers of suitable volunteers being forthcoming (and hence this article!).

Volunteers Required In a nutshell, if the Parish Council is to be in a position to save our Library, then we need residents to volunteer to: (1) Become members of the “Nettleham Community Library Management Committee” (who will be responsible for the overall management of the facility on behalf of the Parish Council). At this stage,

it is envisaged that the Committee would operate on similar lines to the Village Hall Management Committee, and/or (2) Be part of a “group” who would, on a rota system, run the library on a day-to-day basis. Again at this stage, it is envisaged that, at least initially, the library would be open for some 16 hours per week (eg 4 hours each day on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Saturdays). Appropriate training would be provided by LCC’s professional library support team.

Way Forward If you are interested in volunteering and thereby helping to save your library - then the Parish Council would be delighted to hear from you as soon as possible (for contact details please see page 5).

Finally, the Parish Council has arranged a Special Meeting (see below) at which the Council will review this situation and decide whether or not to submit a Business Plan to LCC for the potential formation of a Community Library in Nettleham. Please do come along to this meeting and tell us what you think we should do!

The Special Parish Council Meeting will be in the Large Hall at The Old School on Wednesday 19 March 2014 starting 7.30pm.

Bishops Beaten Up in Village!

You will be relieved to hear this isn’t as bad as it sounds! The reference is to the Bishop’s Meadow area of the village and ‘beating up’ is a forestry term for the removal and replacement of young trees which have not survived their first year.

As readers will know, well over 300 trees and shrubs were planted on the formerly under-used field in March 2013 in a large triangular block, two copses and in a new hedge along the fence separating the Bishop’s Meadow from the Scheduled Ancient Monument site.

Inevitably, some of the ‘whips’ didn’t make it through the summer and so they were replaced by members of Nettleham Woodland Trust and a group of enthusiastic guides on Saturday 30 November.

In the weeks ahead, there will be preparations for the planting of the orchard of a dozen or more traditional apple trees being co-ordinated by Chrissie Clayton.

This will be completed before the visit by HRH The Duke of Kent on the morning of Tuesday 11 March. The Duke will be in Nettleham for about an hour and will plant an oak tree in the Bishop’s Meadow, opposite the Prince of Wales gate.

The Parish Council and NWT members are now making the necessary arrangements for this event and with a little luck, there will have been enough blue skies, warmth and sunshine in February and early March to bring on the trees, shrubs and the new wildflowers to make a good show for the royal visitor and everyone else in the village in their own gardens and public spaces.

Fingers crossed!

Cllr Terry Williams

Chris Williams

Chairman of Nettleham Parish Council

Chairman, Nettleham Woodland Trust

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MULSANNE PARK Nettleham Tennis Club is LTA registered and welcomes everyone, irrespective of gender, age or ability, providing tennis for both social players and league players, seniors and juniors

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Letters from Readers The following letter is in response to the reply on page 15 of the winter edition of Nettleham News by Chris Williams, (Chairman of Nettleham Woodland Trust) to Harry Carter’s original letter on page 21 in the autumn 2013 edition of the magazine I refer to Mr Williams’ response in relation to my criticism of Monks Wood and I believe I am entitled to answer his somewhat official comments.

applied to all persons, irrespective of age.

I have seen litter, but not the large amount that Mr Williams is referring to, perhaps he is thinking of somewhere else.

Bureaucrats and officials wilt into insignificance if they cannot ply their trade by telling people what and what they cannot do.

Firstly, I have been in Nettleham for nearly 40 years and being a Lincoln lad I am familiar with the area. Ashing Lane has been there all the time that I can remember and it also has been a Bridleway which leads down onto Monks Wood area and continues towards Langworth area.

I have walked this and other paths with dogs for many years. I have walked it when it was farm land and I referred to the area as Monks Wood to enable readers to identify the area to which I am referring.

I do not like signs in an area where people should be allowed to wander without the dictation of signs telling them what and what not to do. Responsible people still outnumber the irresponsible and to tell them to take their litter home is really just another sign. Most will, some will not, irrespective of more of your signs.

The hard work I was referring to was the planting of the trees. I do not think the volunteers were walking around with signs wondering where to put them, that is the job of bureaucrats and officials.

I am astounded that he denies any knowledge of the devastation I referred to around the mature trees, albeit this is not called Monks Wood, but nevertheless is run by the National Woods Trust.

I do not agree that all the youths that go to the area are portrayed as potential vandals and litter louts. This title may be

With reference to the dead swan, perhaps it would be prudent to say why it died.

The letter implies that it was killed by someone. Foxes prowl the area and if it was near the water’s edge then it would be prone to attack. Pure speculation indeed, but nevertheless it is just one possibility of many.

The new fences erected are no doubt to keep something out or something in, I do not know, but ugly and irrelevant and of course blessed with another sign.

In all my years on this planet, I have learnt that putting signs up just encourages the opposite reaction… who was it that said: “A nature reserve stops being one when man intervenes.”?

I suspect that it soon will be the reserve of Mr Williams’ friends, family and neighbours. I don’t think it was ever designed for locals, despite it being the property of the Co-op, of which it is said, “is run by the people for the people.”

Maybe it should read for some people.

Harry Carter

Editor This exchange of opinions on this topic could continue indefinitely and I feel that the correspondents should now agree to differ and, unless any other reader wishes to contribute an alternative viewpoint to the discussion, this particular subject of correspondence should now be concluded

Irresponsible Dog Walkers I have lived in this village virtually my entire life and have never been subjected to such a shocking situation in all that time.

Every day I walk my dog on the public footpath between High Leas and Scothern.

In the past month I have had numerous encounters with abusive and aggressive dog owners, who seem to think it is perfectly acceptable to allow their dogs to run around, out of control and free to approach my dog however it pleases.

As a responsible dog owner whose dog is always kept on a lead and under control, and father of a young child, it frightens me that nothing will be done to stop this until someone is seriously hurt. God forbid it should be a child who gets caught between two fighting dogs!

I am appealing to other dog owners, who do take this situation seriously to please contact the Parish Council and complain.

It is about time something is done!

Dog Attack in the Village!

I am writing to Nettleham News as a concerned resident. On Saturday 11 January my wife and I were out walking our dog through the village and, whilst walking around the pond in the police HQ grounds at around 2.00pm, we came upon a large white boxer and Staffordshire bull terrier running off their leads.

the village the owner lived, so we don’t hold out much hope of him being found.

We dread to think what could have happened if my wife hadn’t picked up our dog. When we got home we cleaned our little dog up and her tail didn’t stop bleeding on and off for hours, until she settled down on her bed.

They immediately jumped around our dog and the Staffordshire bull terrier was trying to bite our Westie. My wife picked up our dog and the bull terrier then jumped up my wife and bit our dog’s tail. The owner apologised, but whilst he was doing so, his dog continued jumping up to try and get our dog.

When we finally calmed down, my wife realised her new trousers had been ripped by the dog’s claws and she had scratches and bruising on her leg from the dog jumping up her in an attempt to reach our dog - my wife was lucky not to have been bitten as well!

When I asked for his address he just said “What do you want that for, there’s no need to go that far!” He then moved on quickly.

We just want to stress to dog owners that they are responsible for their dogs which should be on a lead or, if it’s dangerous or snappy, then it should have a muzzle.

We put our dog down and realised her tail was bleeding. We later reported it to the police, but we don’t know whereabouts in

We thought that everyone needed to know what happened, because we don’t want this to happen to anyone else.

Name and addess withheld

A Concerned Dog Owner 21

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CASTLE GARAGE DOORS HAIR STYLIST Ladies, gents and children

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The Green Thing A wry, tongue-in-cheek look back at the ‘good old days’, but were they quite so good as we fondly remember them? There were quite a few not so good things as well! Perhaps today’s younger generation will themselves look back nostalgically at the world as it is today!

Lincoln Friends of Anthony Nolan has recently been formed and we would love to hear from anyone who may be interested in joining us in raising funds and awareness for the charity Anthony Nolan which finds donors for children and adults needing lifesaving bone marrow transplants.

The charity celebrates its 40th anniversary this year and so it seems like a great time to launch our own friends’ group and help them spread the word!

When Shirley Nolan started the bone marrow register forty years ago in an effort to save the life of her only son Anthony, she surely did not realise how her efforts would grow and that she would be helping to save thousands of lives. Sadly Anthony never found his donor and he tragically died aged seven, but Shirley continued her incredible work in his memory.

We would love to hear from anyone who may like to join a small committee of volunteers and also from people who may perhaps have ideas about fundraising or sponsorship. Perhaps you work for a company who would consider us as their ‘Charity of the Year’ or would do a one-off event for us like a cake sale, coffee morning or a dress-down day?

Maybe you can offer us a raffle or auction prize for one of the events we will be holding in the future? Perhaps you would like to achieve an ambition - like doing a bungee jump, or running a marathon and are seeking a special charity who could benefit from your great effort? Please consider us - we’ll support you all the way!

We are also available to give talks to groups about the charity and the extent of the work they do, so please get in touch if this interests you.

We hope to hear from you and hopefully to see you at one of the events we will be holding in the near future. Please do not hesitate to get in touch with any thoughts and ideas - all will be much appreciated.

Julie Cook Telephone: 01673 866633 Email: lincolnfriendsofan@gmail.com

Checking out at the supermarket, the young cashier suggested to the much older woman, that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren’t good for the environment.

The woman apologised and explained, “We didn’t have this ‘green thing’ back in my days. The young cashier responded, “That’s our problem today - your generation didn’t care enough to save our environment for future generations.”

She was quite right, our generation didn’t have the ‘green thing’ in its day.

Back then, we returned milk bottles, lemonade bottles and beer bottles to the shop. The shop sent them back to the factory to be washed, sterilised and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were recycled.

But we didn’t have the ‘green thing’ back in our day.

Grocery shops put our groceries into brown paper bags that we re-used for numerous things, most memorable (besides household bags for rubbish), being their use as book covers for our schoolbooks. This was to ensure that public property (the books provided for our use by the school), was not defaced by our scribblings. Then we were able to personalise our books on the brown paper covers. Too bad we didn’t do the ‘green thing’ back then.

We walked up stairs, because there wasn’t a lift in every supermarket, shop and office building. We walked to the local shop and didn’t climb into a pollution-emitting machine every time we had to go half a mile. But she was right. We didn’t have the ‘green thing’ in our day.

Back then, we washed the baby’s terry towel nappies because we didn’t have the disposable kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy-gobbling machine - wind and solar power really did dry our clothes back in our early days. Kids had hand-medown clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always new designer-brand clothing.

But that young lady was right.

We didn’t have the ‘green thing’ back in our day.

Back then, we had one radio or TV in the house - not a television in every room and it had a screen the size of a large handkerchief, not a screen the size of Scotland.

In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we didn’t have electrically powered machines to do everything for us.

When we packaged a fragile item to post, we used old newspapers to cushion it, not polystyrene or plastic bubble-wrap.

Back then, we didn’t fire up an engine and burn petrol just to cut the lawn we pushed the mower that ran on human power. We exercised by working so we didn’t need to go to a health club to run on electrically-driven treadmills. But she’s right. We didn’t have the ‘green thing’ back then.

We drank from a tap or water fountain when we were thirsty, instead of using a plastic cup and the water hadn’t been transported hundreds of miles in plastic bottles. We refilled writing pens with ink instead of buying a new plastic pen.

We replaced the blade in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade became dull. But we didn’t have the ‘green thing’ back then.

Back then, people took the bus and children rode their bikes to school, or walked, instead of turning their mums into a 24-hour taxi service in the family’s ‘people carrier’ which costs the same as a whole house did before the ‘green thing’.

We had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances and we didn’t need a computerised gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 23,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest pub!

But isn’t it sad that the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just because we didn’t have the ‘green thing’ back then?

You Have to Smile!

It’s so unfair: When a man talks dirty to a woman its considered sexual harassment, but when a woman talks dirty to a man it costs £10.00/minute (charges may vary).

They say that sex is the best form of exercise.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t think 1 minute and 15 seconds every 6 months is going to shift this spare tyre!

I just booked a table for Valentine’s Day for me and the wife. It’s bound to end in tears though she’s useless at snooker.

The Grim Reaper came for me last night and I beat him off with a vacuum cleaner talk about Dyson with death!

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NETTLEHAM HANDYMAN All aspects of property maintenance No job too small Insured/Enhanced CRB Disclosure Telephone Martin Brewer on

01522 752897 or mobile:

07990 644389

MARK CROPPER NVQ Forestry 1&2, City & Guilds 1&2: ARB

Professional Tree Surgeon FULLY INSURED All aspects of tree care and hedge trimming undertaken Tree contractor to Nettleham Parish Council

For FREE ESTIMATE

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You know you’re living in 2014 when...

Txt Abbs 4 Snrs Young people have theirs, now Seniors have their own texting abbreviation codes:

ATD At The Doctor’s BFF Best Friend’s Funeral BTW Bring The Wheelchair BYOT Bring Your Own Teeth CBPHI Covered By Private Healthcare Insurance CUATMBMLC See You At The Mabel Briggs Memorial Lunch Club DWI Driving While Incontinent FWIW Forgot Where I Was GHA Got Heartburn Again HGBM Had Good Bowel Movement LMDO Laughing My Dentures Out LOL Living on Lipitor TOT Texting On Toilet WAITT Who Am I Talking To?

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You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.

You haven’t played patience with real cards in years.

SECRETARY REQUIRED FOR NETTLEHAM WOODLAND TRUST NWT’s Secretary, Susie Mendel, is standing down at the Charity’s AGM in May after nearly 8 years.

For the Charity to continue its valuable work it requires a Secretary. The job involves answering queries, setting the Agenda and taking the Minutes at committee meetings and liaising with the Chairman, Treasurer and other committee members on NWT business.

If anyone is interested in taking on this worthwhile role, or would like more information, please contact: Chairman, Chris Williams, email: crw197@gmail.com or Susie email: members@ nettlehamwoodlandtrust.co.uk The date of the AGM will be posted on the notice board outside the Co-op in early May. Everyone is welcome to attend. www.nettlehamwoodlandtrust.co.uk

You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.

You email or text the person who works at the desk next to you.

Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don’t have email addresses.

You pull up in your own driveway and use your mobile phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

Every television commercial has a website at the bottom of the screen.

Leaving the house without your mobile phone (which you didn’t even have the first 20, 30 or 60 years of your life), is now a cause for panic and you have to go back and get it.

You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.

You start tilting your head sideways to smile :-) You’re reading this, nodding and laughing knowingly.

Old Photographs of Nettleham

This photograph of Beckside (date unknown), although clearly an old image, shows how remarkably little this scene has changed over the years

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Police News Cyber-bullying: what is it and how to avoid it Cyber-bullying occurs when electronic communications such as text messages, emails, instant messages and social media updates are used to threaten or humiliate someone.

The consequences can be just as serious as the effects of physical bullying. Learn how to recognize and address cyber-bullying before it gets out of hand.

What to look out for ● Hateful or threatening verbal messages, including name-calling and attempts to control someone’s behaviour by threatening to expose embarrassing information and/or threats of violence ●

Embarrassing or threatening images or verbal abuse - an unending barrage of emails, instant messages or texts, whether or not they are specifically threatening in nature

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Public humiliation - humiliating messages on a social media site, in a blog or another public space

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The spreading of rumours and gossip using social media, text messages and other online tools

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The sharing of pictures that may be embarrassing or explicit in nature, or are altered with the intent to humiliate, on social media websites and through text messaging

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Creation of a website containing defamatory images, insults and untrue rumours about the target.

What action should I take?

Don’t respond to the bully’s messages and don’t threaten the bully in order to get back at him or her. Sending a return threatening message out of exasperation will only provoke the bully to keep up the bad behaviour and it may get you in trouble too.

Save the evidence - carefully file every email, text, instant message, web address, and other evidence you can collect from the bully. Record the time and date that each message was sent.

Having as much information as possible about the bully’s behaviour will help you determine how to stop his or her behaviour.

Block the bully ● Delete the person from your email contacts and block instant messaging communication. ●

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Delete the person from your social networks and prevent them from getting in contact with you again.

Block the person from your mobile phone.

Don’t reveal your address, telephone number or whereabouts online.

Social media sites make it easy for people to contact you in a lot of different ways, but they all have privacy settings you can use to keep certain people from bothering you.

Change your settings so that only close friends are able to contact you Don’t wait too long to ask for help.

If you’re a child or teenager, ask an adult for help. Your parents, teachers, principal and school counsellor are all in a position to put a stop to the situation before it goes any further.

If you’re a parent, take the situation seriously and address it immediately.

Cyber-bullying has often had tragic consequences.

Talk to your school administrators.

If you’re a child or teenager, know that taking this issue to the school is the right thing to do. Other kids at the school may be experiencing cyber-bullying too. The school needs to be made aware of the problem in order to take steps to end it.

If you’re a parent, set up a meeting with the school’s headteacher in order to address the problem.

Report the bully to your internet service provider (ISP).

Get law enforcement involved. In some cases cyber-bullying may be classified as a crime, which places it beyond the jurisdiction of the school and internet

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service provider. If the cyber-bullying involves one of the following elements, call your local police: ●

Stalking and use of intimidation

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Threats of violence or death

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Sexually explicit photographs or descriptions of a minor, which is considered child pornography

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Secretly-recorded photographs or videos that were taken without the subject’s knowledge.

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Hate-related communications or actions

Never share information online if it could possibly be used against you.

Cyber-bullies often use pictures, status updates and personal information they find online to harass their targets.

It’s fine to share a little information about yourself online, but never reveal something you don’t want the whole world to know!

If you want to keep up with all the latest police news in your area, please join us on Twitter and Facebook. We also have an email address if you want to contact us, these are listed below.

twitter.com@npt-nettleham

facebook.com/nptnettleham

nettleham.npt@lincs.pnn.police.uk

LINCOLNSHIRE POLICE Nettleham Neighbourhood Policing Team Police Station Scothern Lane Nettleham Lincoln LN2 2TU Email nettleham.npt@lincs.pnn.police.uk

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Nettleham Medical Practice

Hotel Security

and Cherry Willingham Branch Surgery

This information may have been featured previously in the magazine, but stands repeating for those who perhaps missed it the first time.

Staff Changes Karen, one of our Practice Nurses, is leaving us after 15 years’ service to be a Practice Nurse at the Lindum surgery. She will be missed by everyone at the Practice, as well as by her patients.

We are pleased to welcome the following staff to the team: Rebecca and Gemma have joined as Practice Nurses, Vicky as a Health Care Assistant and April as an administrator.

Please note that the INR day for patients is changing to Tuesday; please ask at reception for more details.

Unfortunately on New Year’s Day a window was broken at Cherry Willingham Surgery. Please report any problems to the surgery.

Patient Record Sharing Changes The Patient Record Sharing Changes have now come into action. This means that you will have new options about whether to share your GP electronic records with other local health services that use the SystmOne programme, such as District Nurses, Podiatry and A&E at Lincoln. Information leaflets are now available in the waiting room to which patients may refer.

At your next visit you will be asked to complete a form indicating whether you would like to opt in to this new scheme or not. Members of the Patient Participation Group have been available in the Waiting Room to provide more information and help with the completion of the consent forms, alternatively please ask a member of staff for more details.

SMS Messaging Service The Practice is now able to provide SMS text messages confirming appointment details. When you next contact the surgery you may be asked for verbal consent to register for this service. Once registered a text message will be sent confirming appointment bookings immediately after the appointment has been made, and a further reminder will be sent the day before your appointment. Please can we request that all patients make sure that we hold the correct mobile phone numbers and notify the Practice of any changes.

Early closures for training 2014 In order to enable our doctors and staff to be kept up to date, Nettleham surgery will be closed for training at 1.00pm on the following afternoons. Emergency help is still available by calling 111.

Tuesday 18 March Patient Participation Group News & Voluntary Driver Scheme We have been very visible and busy at both Nettleham and Cherry Willingham Surgeries these last few weeks and our input will continue.

If you are at either surgery and see someone from the PPG, do please make contact with us. If there are any issues you wish to discuss, or that we can help you with we will, or will point you to those who perhaps could help you more ably.

Pam Henderson Chairperson

Telephone: 01522 858451 Email: pam.henderson36@ntlworld.com

Contact details:

Nettleham telephone: 01522 751717 When the surgery is closed, telephone: Freephone 111 Website: www.nettlehammedical.co.uk Practice Manager: Helen Lunn

HOTEL KEY CARDS Have you ever wondered exactly what information is probably contained on your magnetic hotel keycard?

Answer: a. Your name b. Your partial home address c. Your hotel room number d. Check-in and check-out dates e. Credit card number and expiration date!

When you return it to the front desk, your personal information is there for any employee to access by simply scanning the card in the hotel scanner. A dishonest employee could take a handful of cards home and, using a scanning device, copy the information onto a laptop computer and then go shopping at your expense.

Simply put, the information on these cards is not erased until the card is re-issued to the next hotel guest, at which time, the new guest’s information is electronically ‘over-written’ onto the card, only then erasing the previous guest’s information in the process.

But until the card is rewritten for the next guest occupying that room, it usually is kept in a drawer at the front desk with YOUR INFORMATION ON IT! The bottom line is: keep the card, take it home with you, or destroy it. NEVER leave it behind in the room or wastebasket, and NEVER return it to the front desk when you check out of a room. They will not charge you for taking the card (it’s illegal) and you’ll be sure you are not leaving a lot of valuable personal information on it that could be easily lifted off with a scanning device card reader.

For the same reason, if you arrive at the airport and discover you still have the card key in your pocket, do not toss it in an airport trash basket. Take it home and destroy it by cutting it up, especially through the electronic information strip!

If you take a small fridge magnet on your trip, pass it across the magnetic strip several times at the end of your stay.

Then try it in the door, it will not work the magnet erases everything on the card.

Most people never give a thought as to what other information, other than the access code for the room, is carried on a hotel magnetic key card!

Information courtesy of Metropolitan Police Service

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TAYLORS OF WELTON

Pet and animal feeds and accessories

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Contact your local

Independent Travel Agency Trading for 30 years at the Sincil Street Agency Speak to Paul Brewer or a member of his staff for their excellent and unbiased advice

Stockists of most makes of dog foods Suppliers of Allen & Page, Dodson, Horrell, Doggie Feeds, etc Coal gas sticks Logs

12 Cliff Road, Welton Telephone

SHOP 01673 862996 HOME 01673 860215 Small charge for local deliveries

Fiona Milnes Cakes by Design 62 Sudbrooke Lane Nettleham Lincoln LN2 2RR (01522) 804904

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19 The Green, Nettleham

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Telephone 01522 595566

11 Canterbury Road, Bracebridge Heath, Lincoln LN4 2TD

www.cakes-by-design.com

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Just a Glass of Water! resting on paper serviettes. Or it may be a tin tray with a small jug containing tepid water which has been on the table for some time, and a single glass. Or then again, it could be a single large glass almost overflowing with water, or a very small one only half full.

As a public speaker I am frequently asked, when accepting a booking, what I will need in the way of equipment such as a projector, screen, table, etc.

If it is to be a talk without a visual display I reply, “Just a glass of water, nothing else”. And so the matter rests.

Then, arriving at the meeting itself I am probably greeted by someone completely different from the person I spoke to in the first place.

“Would you like anything provided?” I am asked. “Just a glass of water”, I reply thinking that it is usually automatic to provide a speaker with a drink.

There are times when I am asked to arrive, perhaps, half-an-hour into the meeting to allow for business to be concluded. If so, I glance at the table from which I am to speak. Yes, there is a glass of water I note, or no, there is no glass of water. If the latter, after I have been introduced to the Chairperson, I whisper, “Could I have just a glass of water, please?” This is where the chain of command comes into operation.

The Chairperson whispers to the Secretrary, who then whispers to the Speaker-finder and so on until finally a person heads off to the kitchen.

On the other hand, there might already be a glass of water provided, but because of space needed on the table for papers, etc, it has been delegated to the floor, by a hot radiator, only to appear when the business has been concluded, slightly warmed.

The result of making the simple request for ‘a glass of water’ can be varied. Perhaps, very grandly, a silver tray bearing a large jug of water covered with a crocheted doily, ice cubes, two upturned glasses all

Then there are other drinking vessels which may be pressed into service - a green beryl institutional teacup, with apologies as no glass is available, a plastic glass, a thick mug as found on a building site, perhaps chipped!

Sometimes, in a schoolroom for example, the request for water is met with, “Sorry but everywhere is locked up”. Inevitably then your mouth dries up before the allotted time is out.

It is on such occasions that some kind soul nips to his/her home around the corner and returns with a bottle of water and a glass the day is saved.

Once, as a result of excessive hand gesticulations, the glass of water was upset all over the tablecloth and my notes.

What consternation - a rush to the kitchen for a cloth, a second person leaps up to refill the glass and eventually order is once again restored.

Visits to Wine Circles can be completely different. There, one is met, practically at the door, with a generous glass of the Speaker-finder’s home-made white wine.

Not be outdone, the Chairperson then places on the table, when I am about to start, not just a glass but the bottle itself, of his/her own red wine. Whether or not the talk has been appreciated, everyone is in such a good mood by the end that the applause is almost overwhelming!

Just a glass of water!

Ken Day

European Union A German approaches a lady of the night.

“I vish to buy sex viz you.”

“OK,” says the girl, “I charge £20 an hour.” “..goot, but I must varn you, I am a little kinky.”

“No problem,” she replies cautiously, “I can do a little kinky.”

In the girl’s flat, the German produces four large bedsprings and a duck caller.

“I vant zat you tie ze springs to each of your hans und knees.”

The girl finds this most odd, but complies, fastening the springs as he instructed.

“Now you vill get on your hans und knees.”

She does, balancing precariously on the springs.

“You vill please to blow zis kwacker as I make love to you.”

She finds it odd, but figures it’s harmless enough (and the guy is paying after all!)

She finds the sex is fantastic, as she is bounced all over the room by the energetic German, all the time quacking away on the duck caller.

The climax is the most sensational that she has ever experienced and it is several minutes before she recovers.

When she eventually does get her breath back she says, “That was totally amazing, what do you call that position?”

“Ah,” says the German... “zat is ze...

Four-sprung Duck Technique” 31

Dunholme Lodge Open Gardens National Garden Scheme Dates for 2014

Sundays May 11 and July 13 11.00am - 5.00pm We have been opening our gardens for a few years now. This will be the third time with the National Garden Scheme raising money for St Chad’s Church and for the National Garden Scheme’s chosen charities which are nursing, caring and gardening charities.

The gardens are approximately 3 acres and include a wildflower area, shrubs, vegetable garden, topiary hedge, a well, a natural pond and a newly-planted fern area.

Wheelchair access is good to most parts of the garden, although there is some loose stone and gravel in some areas.

A toilet is available.

Stalls Supervised children are welcome Dogs on leads are welcome

All this for £2.50 each and children free The premises were part of what was RAF Dunholme Lodge during the last war and we have a war memorial and a museum nearby in an old cottage in the garden. Both are well worth a visit and when you have seen them, you can then enjoy a cup of tea and a superb selection of cakes whilst you chat with friends.

Bring your friends, aunties and uncles, grannies and granddads and enjoy a lovely afternoon out.

We are only 4 miles out of Lincoln on the A46 near Welton.

Just take the turn to Welton and we are half a mile along on the left.

We look forward to seeing you!

Hugh and Lesley Wykes Dunholme Lodge Dunholme Lincoln LN2 3QA

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Old Photographs of Nettleham

See if you can work out where this old photograph (date unknown) of a row of cottages in Nettleham was taken - note the hand water pump in the garden

This old photograph of the High Street (date unknown) shows the then-called Wesleyan Chapel, with the last windmill in Nettleham visible just behind it

And this one, again of the High Street, clearly shows the concrete pipes of Jubilee Bridge taking Church Street across The Beck where a ford used to be and the Nettleham School buildings with high perimeter stone wall (photograph date unknown)

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The History of the Cricket Bat After the recent loss of The Ashes, I recalled to mind a man I worked for many years ago. To say he was a cricket fan is an understatement!

take up copious amounts of water and if they are grown near to residential properties their roots can soon invade drains and sewers and cause havoc.

Farmers can grow willows specifically to be felled for bats, but they do need careful nurturing and ‘manicuring’ as they grow.

In the days before mobile telephones, he would mysteriously disappear in the summer. We eventually found out he was sitting in lay-bys listening to the cricket on his car radio, while we held the fort in the office dealing with clients and saying “I am sorry, he is visiting a client”.

There are not many willow trees in Nettleham. There is a beautiful weeping willow at the top of Brookfield Avenue and one or two others by the Beck.

A willow sapling is planted when it is twelve and a half feet high to a depth of at least thirty inches. This leaves between nine and ten feet to grow into a mature trunk which is the length of three or four cricket bats. Any lateral shoots must be cut off as soon as they appear during the first five or six years.

This ensures knot-free wood with an even grain,which is important in a cricket bat - the wider the grain the longer the bat will last.

We learned to say to him when he walked sheepishly back into the office “What’s the score John?” One day he said “There is nothing quite like the sound of leather on willow”. Watching the quintessentially English summer afternoon scenes on Mulsanne Park I have to say that the thwack of the ball hitting the bat is evocative. Despite great changes in technology and an ever-faster world, the scene is timeless and has changed little in many years.

This in turn has led me to investigate the willow tree because the best cricket bats are made out of willow and it is a very old business indeed.

Is there anything lovelier than the swaying of the branches of willow leaves along a river bank? Unfortunately willows are problematical in that they do

However, willow is the wood used for cricket bats. Having learned this, I have carried out some research and realize that bat making is a very old craft reliant on the expert eyes of tree growers who select suitable willow for bats. One of these companies, J S Wright & Sons of Essex, is the world’s largest supplier.

They are the experts in willow and their representatives travel the country felling up to thirty trees a day which are taken back to their yard to prepare for the production of bats.

There are hundreds of species of willow, but it is the Cricket Bat Willow, Salix alba coerulea, which is the preferred one.

It is a white willow, very tough and shock-resistant. A cricket bat, with a flat face and a ridge on the reverse, when hit by a cricket ball at possibly 90mph, will not dent or splinter.

The tree grows at a very fast rate, and can reach a height of sixty feet in just fifteen to twenty years!

After felling, the wood is cut into cricket bat sized pieces, inspected by Wrights and graded from one to four. Only the top grade will be suitable for a Test cricketer. The ‘bats’ are then dipped in oil at each end to prevent splitting and left in the air to season for a few months before they can be fashioned into bats.

The main part of the bat is called the blade and is connected to a long cylindrical cane handle. This handle is like that of a tennis racquet and is spliced to the blade.

It is intriguing to note that this type of spliced handle was developed in the 1880s by Charles Richardson, who learned engineering under Brunel and was a lead engineer on the Severn Railway Tunnel! I wonder if he slipped away to watch cricket when he should have been digging the tunnel?

Many years ago the cricket bat was narrower and more like a hockey stick.

This has led to the speculation that shepherds used to play cricket with their shepherds’ crooks. At the Oval in London is displayed the oldest known bat made in 1729.

The making of bats is a cherished craft using knives and planes, with little in the way of mechanization. The best bats are still polished with a shin bone of a horse to obtain a smooth finish.

Because the Cricket Bat Willow does not grow well in Australia, we have the satisfaction of knowing that Australian cricket players have to import cricket bats from England in order to perform well. Perhaps we can say that England did have a part in them winning The Ashes!

Phyllis Maiden

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JC URTIS CURTIS

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PPLUMBING LUMBING & HHEATING EATING

safe REGISTER

206407

ALL ASPECTS OF PLUMBING AND HEATING WORK UNDERTAKEN General plumbing maintenance and repairs Boiler servicing and repairs Boiler replacements Central heating installation and repairs Bathroom installations Gas Safety Certificates Free quotes BASED IN NETTLEHAM For a professional and competitive service call:

01522 800058 Mobile: 07795 164317 Email: j.curtis@rocketmail.com 5 Eastway, Nettleham LN2 2RU

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LINDAP Designing and making gadgets to help the disabled When I retired, I looked around for a way to continue using my engineering skills in the voluntary sector.

I found it by joining Lindap, a Lincolnshire charity that makes individually-tailored devices to improve the lives of people with disabilities, where nothing suitable for them is commercially available.

There are more and more good products available to help disabled people carry out all the activities of daily life. However, everybody is different. Some find standard products don’t suit them very well, whilst others may have a hobby they wish to enjoy, but injury or infirmity means help is needed to grip or steady things.

And unfortunately there is sometimes a need to stop someone with dementia doing something which might injure them.

It’s these special situations with which Lindap is good at helping.

Our volunteers make all kinds of gadgets, such as: ●

Devices to make handles and controls easier to grip

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Non-standard chair, bed and sofa raisers

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Devices to attach things to wheelchairs, such as cameras and drink holders

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Non-standard stair gates

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Security covers for oven and shower controls, switches and sockets

Many requests for help come from professionals in the NHS or Social Services, who cannot find anything standard available to meet a particular patient’s need.

All Lindap’s work is done by volunteers, mostly engineers and craftspeople, who meet regularly to discuss how each individual problem can be solved.

Members take on whichever tasks best suit their skills, equipment, location and time available. Some make quite sophisticated pieces of electro-mechanical engineering, but lacking a workshop I mostly undertake things which are little more than DIY. The aim of course is to make someone’s life easier, preferably with something that does not look out of place in the home.

The photographs show a few of my completed projects.

A favourite chair raised to help a man with difficulties in balancing

Readers of Nettleham News will include some who could benefit from, and some who could contribute to, this work. If you are disabled and have needs not being met by available equipment, it’s best to talk first to your Occupational Therapist. This is the preferred route for requests to Lindap, since we rely on their expertise to say what is safe and beneficial for the users. But a reminder that we can make or adapt ‘specials’ may not come amiss. However direct requests from a disabled person, or carer, are always considered.

Special wheelchair table for a man with restricted arm function

You can telephone me on:

01522 595263 or email me at:

lindap@mw475.plus.com to discuss whether we can help you, or you can help us.

I’d be delighted to give an illustrated talk to any local group which would like to know more about our activities.

Bill Ball

If you like making things, and would like to see your handiwork benefit people in need, then why not join us? I can vouch for the satisfaction you will get from using your ingenuity to solve individual problems, and from seeing how much what you’ve made improves the lives of disabled people.

A temporary shower step for a lady waiting for a proper walk-in shower to be fitted

Finally, we do need a bit of money to keep going. Each job costs about £35 on average - if anyone would like to sponsor a job, we will let you have a picture and some details (anonymised for client confidentiality) of what we’ve done with your donation.

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Wheelchair-mounted camera support for a lady unable to hold her camera steady

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The Christmas Village W Wow! The 29th of December was actually a beautiful sunny and clear blue-sky day! It proved to be the incentive, if that was ever needed, for 42 people (yes, count them) to meet at 11.00 o’clock on The Green for our annual festive Village Walk.

The group set off along the Beck and through the grounds of the police headquarters, via PC Wood, to walk up to Riseholme Lane along the footpath known as ‘The Gitty’.

The long crocodile was in fine health and spirits; friends catching up with news, family members still arguing about the Christmas Day game of Monopoly, and others just soaking up the winter sun and long views across the classic wintry Lincolnshire countryside.

Walking back into the village along Washdyke Lane and Kingsway, the group was delighted to be met by a roving member of the Fieldpaths Committee who offered mince pies and drinks to everyone. This was a nice treat (well three mince pies a day in December is normal isn’t it?) before entering the Bishop’s Palace field.

This is developing into a really attractive amenity for the village and added interest to the walk as we made our way through the Prince of Wales Gate to the burial ground extension now known as ‘The Swathe’.

Progressing along the field-edge paths, we returned to The Green along ‘The Park’ footpath.

A lovely Sunday morning walk and I’m sure everyone went home feeling refreshed and with a strong sense of community spirit.

Sara Bright Chair, Fieldpaths Committee Editor It’s good to see so many village folk coming together for a brisk walk in the local countryside enjoying the exercise and fresh air after all the excesses of the Christmas festivities!

Why don’t you join them on the next village walk?

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HELP LIVES

SAVE LIVES

Public Access Defibrillator and Nettleham LIVES In the autumn 2013 edition of Nettleham News, we told you about our plans to install a Public Access Defibrillator (PAD) in the village.

I’m pleased to advise that in December 2013, the PAD was installed - hopefully you will have already spotted the bright yellow box!

It is located outside the Co-op store, just to the left of the post-box. This has been paid for by Nettleham LIVES and donated to the village for use by trained local residents and the emergency services.

I’d like to pass on our thanks to Co-op store manager, David Hale, for his time and effort in supporting this community initiative, to Steve Hyde from LIVES headquarters and David Wright from Nettleham LIVES in co-ordinating the entire project.

The new Public Access Defibrillator (PAD) outside the Co-op store in Nettleham

The defibrillator (defib) is held within the cabinet with a keypad lock. If it is needed the person would call 999 and the access code would be given, allowing them to unlock the cabinet and retrieve the machine.

They then follow the instructions given by the defib upon opening the top cover.

The presumption is that if someone tries to access the machine, they know what it is for and how to use it. For example, it’s likely to be a LIVES off-duty First Responder or similarly trained individual who would use the defib in the close vicinity of the Co-op store.

We envisage being able to carry out some training in the use of the Defib and CPR outside the Co-op in the spring when the weather gets warmer, as well as running sessions in the village hall.

If you are interested in this training, please contact Edward Rouse, Co-ordinator, Nettleham LIVES on 01522 753033.

Sadly, three of our First Responders have stepped down from their responding roles recently, so I’ll finish with my regular request for volunteers to come and join us.

Whilst we welcome interest from anybody living in or around the village, we are particularly keen to hear from individuals who are available during the daytime so the active retired and those perhaps working part-time or from home and who are keen to give something back to our local community.

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For further information about any aspect of LIVES please contact Edward Rouse on the telephone number alongside, or please do feel free to join us at one of our regular gatherings at the Village Hall.

Dates of Training and Meeting nights are: Meeting 3 March, 3 April, 8 May and 5 June Training 22 May and 26 June (requalification of Responders taking place in March and April)

Both gatherings start at 7.45pm and last for a little over an hour If you would like to see what we are all about, please drop in to see us - you will be made very welcome.

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Helping RSPCA Lincolnshire My name is Georgia Willerton and I am in year 10 of William Farr Secondary School. In April I am going to run the Lincoln 10k to raise much needed money for the RSPCA Lincolnshire Mid and Lincoln Branch.

Me and my mum (Allison Faulkner) are both volunteer dog walkers (and cat cuddlers!) for the branch and see first hand how the money is needed.

This branch is separate to the National RSPCA and receives no funding from the government. It is run almost entirely by volunteers, who work so hard to look after the animals that come into their care each year. Last year the branch had over 500 animals that needed their help through no fault of their own. It needs money to pay for kennelling costs, food, vet fees, etc. Sometimes the vet fees alone can run into £1000’s of pounds for just one animal!

I have set up a JustGiving website page if anyone would like to donate to this great cause. I am hoping to raise £100 and if you feel able to donate some money, me and the animals will be very, very grateful.

You can donate by going to: www.justgiving.com/A-FAULKNER any money which is donated is then automatically sent to the RSPCA Lincolnshire Mid and Lincoln Branch, adding 25% Gift Aid to every eligible donation.

Thank you once again.

Georgia Willerton age 14 years

Georgia with her kitten Pepsi, which she adopted from the RSPCA at the end of last year

Georgia regularly walks many dogs whilst they are waiting to be placed in new homes

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Nettleham Twinning Association New Twinners wanted, to participate in the visit to Mulsanne 11 - 16 April 2014 On a recent visit to France, I was extremely lucky to spend a few days with my Twinning family, Joel and Nadine Grassin, in Mulsanne (we have been twinned now for around 24 years, and have become very good friends).

Whilst there, Joel took me to a big sports hall, where they were getting people to sign up for classes for the autumn. The photograph below shows the Secretary, Patrick Leger, and the Treasurer, Fernande le Compt, of the Mulsanne Twinning Association, recruiting people to attend English classes.

In the background of the photograph below there are scenes of familiar places in Nettleham.

Patrick told me that, sadly, he couldn’t ‘push’ the Twinning very much, as we, (in Nettleham), don’t seem to have any new people coming forward to twin; (although they always have a ‘stock’ of folk who want to come to us here!)

I really felt very upset when Patrick told me this and wondered what we could do.

SO, GOOD PEOPLE OF NETTLEHAM - HOW ABOUT IT? If you think you might be interested in joining the Twinning Association, please contact me on 01522 524969, or our Secretary, Gill Jones on 01522 802674.

Anne Culling Chair, Nettleham Twinning Association

Monte Carlo comes to Nettleham!

The Twinning Association’s latest event, on 16 November, transformed the Large Schoolroom into a super casino, where tuxedo-clad croupiers ran roulette, blackjack and craps tables.

This was a fun ‘Casino Evening’, the entry ticket price including not only an array of refreshments provided by members, but also an initial supply of casino ‘funny money’, likely to last the evening.

There was a full house and the croupiers were kept busy. It wasn’t only the use of ‘funny money’ that set the schoolroom apart from its Riviera rivals. Of the gamblers, more than forty of them, a few knew something about Roulette, rather fewer anything about Blackjack, but nobody knew the arcane rules and procedures for shooting Craps. No James Bonds or Sky Mastersons amongst them!

So the croupiers, as well as raking in the ‘funny money’, had first to explain everything before play could start in earnest.

The finale of the evening was an auction for punters who still had any casino money left, bidding for five mystery prizes (one of which was a booby prize!). Bidding was brisk, reaching a million casino pounds!

Advertised as a ‘Fun Evening’ the event certainly lived up to its billing!

The Twinning Association is finalising arrangements for this year’s visit to Mulsanne, and members are looking forward impatiently to meeting their French friends again when they arrive at Mulsanne on 10 April for a five-night stay.

There may be a few spare seats on the coach to Mulsanne available for sale to anyone who would like to spend a few days in France. It will be on a first-come first-served basis, so if any non-members are interested they should contact Bob Tompkins on 01522 754654.

Return ticket price will be £100. The coach will leave Nettleham early on the morning of Thursday 10 April 2014, arriving around 5.00pm and returning to Nettleham late evening on the following Tuesday 15.

For those who perhaps don’t know the area, Mulsanne is just south of the grand ancient city of Le Mans with its very impressive cathedral, its 24-hour motor racing tradition with a fine dedicated museum, and is in easy striking distance of many tourist attractions.

Anyone interested in joining the Nettleham Twinning Association would be most welcome (details above).

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ScandiGifts The perfect place for Scandinavian home and gift ideas Telephone 07526 675815 Open: Tuesday - Friday: 9.00am - 5.00pm Saturday: 9.30am - 2.00pm

For details on classes in: North Hykeham, Welton, Bailgate, Waddington, Saxilby, Gainsborough, Retford and Bawtry

Unit 2, 19 The Green, Nettleham, Lincoln LN2 2NR

Call Katy on 07736 463605

(Just behind the Co-op)

lincolnjojingles@hotmail.co.uk www.jojingles.com/lincoln

Email: scandigifts@hotmail.co.uk

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The Reluctant Gardener A short story by T M Lewis “Get that blinking cat out of my kitchen, stinking smelly thing! Full of fleas no doubt!”

Brian, pleasantly absorbing page three of the newspaper he was avidly reading, sighed at his wife’s voice. He compared the picture in the paper to the figure of his wife, hands on hips, her hair with rollers shaking like serpents, a cigarette dangling from her thin tight lips, the ash forming a volcano-like pile on her stained jumper.

Brian sighed again, rose slowly from the hard wooden kitchen stool, picked the offending cat up by the scruff of its protesting neck and gently placed it outside the kitchen door.

The cat flicked its black tail contemptuously at him and softly made its way down the cracked stone path, casting a disdainful glance back at Brian.

Elsie watched his slow performance with agitation. “Isn’t it about time you got off your backside and mowed the lawn, also the conifers want trimming - don’t expect me to do everything - blinking men!“ She muttered to herself the disadvantages of men being spoilt by their mothers. Elsie with half-closed eyes due to the smoke from her permanent cigarette, leaned over the kitchen sink, scratched her nose, coughed slightly and proceeded to wash the breakfast dishes.

Brian closed the kitchen door and managed, with a lot of heaving and puffing, to collect his lawnmower, the electric saw, the wheel barrow and various tools for gardening.

He made a great show of being busy, mindful of his wife’s watchful mean eyes, peering at him from the kitchen window.

The cat watched the man’s progress round the garden. He had perched himself out of sight, as cats do, in the old apple tree. He then moved to a better position on the roof of the garden shed, where he licked his paws.

When his toilet was complete he crouched down and peered at the man, panting and sweating with exertion, mowing the lawn.

Brian cleaned the electric saw - it was a good excuse to have a rest and he sat and whistled as he did so. He wiped his nose on the sleeve of his threadbare jumper and scratched his plump behind. Eyeing the tall overgrown conifers, he went and fetched the old ladder from the shed.

The morning wore on and Brian wiped the perspiration from his face. He viewed with alarm the heap of conifer branches that was accumulating on the lawn and he decided to fill some plastic bags with the cut branches.

As he started to fill the bag, he accidently stepped on the garden rake which promptly hit him in the eye.

At that moment his neighbour poked his grey shorn head over the top of the newly-cut conifers. “Hey Brian, I can actually see what

you look like now” he laughed in a friendly way, a huge grin on his face. Noticing Brian holding his eye he said “Hey! Have you hurt yourself? I can see you’re not used to gardening! There’s a good match on the telly today, you’d better hurry up or you’ll miss it.”

Still laughing, his head disappeared.

Brian cursed his neighbour. Sarcastic devil!

He heard movements from the kitchen and turned to see his wife staring at him with one of her evil looks. Cigarette smoke hung round her face as if she was watching him from hell.

He managed to finish filling the plastic bags with the conifer branches and then sat exhausted on the garden bench. The lawn mower was full of grass cuttings and he moaned to himself that it was just one thing after another. I’ll have a rest, then I’ll cut the apple tree, he thought. It was a large tree with thick limbs spreading claw-like across the lawn. He noticed the cat staring at him from the roof of the garden shed. For some reason its unblinking eyes unnerved him and he threw a small stone at the cat, which leaped off and disappeared.

Brian hesitated. He moved towards the kitchen where he was hoping for a cold drink and entered the kitchen nervously, peering at his wife’s bristling back. He decided to just bathe his painful eye and make a quick exit before she thought of some more delightful jobs for him.

The cat meanwhile had ventured onto the apple tree, patiently waiting for the man.

Brian swung the electric saw high above his head and cut off one of the large apple tree branches. The cat screeched with terror at the noise and leapt over Brian’s head, the shock and surprise of which caused him to cut through another heavy branch which immediately fell onto his head, knocking him unconcious.

Brian awoke to find himself in his own bed, put there with a struggle by his wife and the neighbour. “Well I hope you’re satisfied” his wife said bitterly. “You are a complete idiot - as to gardening, you can forget it!

I’m going to pay my nephew to help out with your work”.

Brian sighed and leaned back against his pillow. He felt the bandage round his head, his blackened eye peering from under it.

Elsie surveyed her husband, her cigarette blowing hot furious smoke. She felt so embarrassed by her husband’s actions.

The neighbour’s laughter was too much.

“It’s a wonder you didn’t kill the cat”, she said as if all at once the cat was as dear to her as a child would have been. “And our neighbour had to clear up your mess in the garden” She blew cigarette smoke rapidly over his head and turning, she left the bedroom.

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The cat decided it was time to find a new home - these humans were too mad for him!

He flicked his black tail, chased a few birds and left the garden for ever.

Brian’s neighbour Bill came regularly to visit him. They became good friends and watched football together on the television. His wife became moody and resentful of their friendship. Brian found he spent more time in his friend’s house, his dizzy blonde wife providing a delightful change from his own wife’s company.

Elsie, finding she had no one to vent her spitefulness on and having made no effort to join her husband and his new friends, left the house, the marriage and the garden which had started it all. Taking only a few pieces of furniture and bits and bobs, she went back to her aged parents, where she nursed them until they eventually died of old age.

Bumping into her husband one day, she was surprised to find a young girl clinging to his arm. She recognized the girl as Bill’s young daughter - they were giggling together their heads bent close. She decided to go back to Brian, informing her husband of her return, she stiffly walked back to her parent’s house.

She became a changed woman, she gave up smoking, she forced herself to smile more, she decided her husband needed a dog, for excercise, she informed him.

Brian was overwhelmed with her concern and his outlook on life changed. He took to dropping in at their local pub with the dog at night, he joked and laughed with the men in the pub, he became popular with the neighbours down the street. He never handled another lawnmower or electric saw in his busy life again. All his wants were fulfilled by the new friends he had made.

Elsie watched his change from servile want to a charm she didn’t know existed. He bought her flowers and chocolates, he took her to restaurants. She felt herself changing too. She became prettier and took to following the latest fashion. When she became pregnant, her world was fulfilled, Brian sipped his beer with Bill. He sighed with contentment stretching his plump legs out in front of him, he smiled at Bill.

“That idea of yours about taking your daughter out to make Elsie jealous worked like a charm. I’ve got my nephew doing the gardening. I can visit the pub every night with my dog and now I’m going to be a father. He slurped his drink, happily everything was alright with the world.

“Your troubles are just beginning, laughed Bill “you wait - when the baby arrives everything will change again!”

“Then I’ll just have to take up gardening again”, joked Brian.

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Report Back from your Local Councillors Core Strategy or Local Plan?

Since work started on the Core Strategy for Central Lincolnshire in 2010, the government has changed its preference for plan-making by local authorities, from a plan containing a number of separate documents to a single Local Plan document.

The Central Lincolnshire Partnership authorities of West Lindsey District Council, North Kesteven District Council, the City of Lincoln Council and Lincolnshire County Council had been preparing a Core Strategy and a separate Allocations Plan for our area.

The Core Strategy was submitted to the Secretary of State for examination on 21 October 2013. The inspector appointed to examine the Core Strategy identified concerns about this two-part plan approach. In response to these concerns, the Core Strategy has been withdrawn and the authorities’ combined work will be put to good use and used to form a single Local Plan.

Councillor Jeff Summers of West Lindsey District Council sees this as “An opportunity to rethink the way we engage with our local communities through our plan-making.

We should ensure that local communities are given clear information about what the options are for each settlement’s growth and allow sufficient time for them to have a good debate before some difficult decisions have to be made by the Joint Strategic Planning Committee.”

The final component of the Core Strategy, the Allocations Plan was due to be adopted by 2016. The new Local Plan is expected to be prepared and adopted in the same timescale.

Short of Money for your Club or Organisation?

Both Cllr Leaning and I have a Councillor’s Initiative Fund available to us to spend on local projects.

The fund allows each District Councillor to put forward proposals for expenditure in our ward to fund projects and initiatives which benefit the local community. A total of £4,000 over the next two years for each councillor is available.

I have supported a number of items around the village: extra aqua sacs (hi-tech sand bags) for the parish council, to protect against flooding, monies to assist with local sports clubs’ equipment and repairs, and funding for photographic equipment for the children at the infants’ school.

Application forms can be obtained online at www.west-lindsey.gov.uk/your-council/your-

councillors/local-councillor-initiative-fund/ All applications submitted are considered and assessed against how they contribute towards the Themes, Priorities and Outcomes in the Corporate Plan.

Council Tax Frozen I am very pleased to report that the Conservative group, which is in the majority at West Lindsey District Council, have committed to freezing the authority’s portion of the Council Tax for this year (2014/15) and for next year (2015/16) as well. I think this is a very real way in which we are helping with the cost of living.

Green Wheelie Waste Bins In more good news for local residents, despite the enormous financial pressures that local authorities are under, your primary Green Wheelie Bin will remain free and the cost of any additional bins is being frozen for next year. Other neighbouring authorities in Lincolnshire charge for the garden waste service, and it was assumed that we would follow that trend. However, the Conservative Group were unanimous; that faced with the relatively marginal savings from introducing a charge or breaking our manifesto promise, we wanted to do the right and principled thing which was to stick to our word. We also know that from a wide-ranging consultation with residents across the district, that the introduction of a charge would not have been strongly opposed by local residents.

Polling Station Review Unfortunately, by the time this edition of Nettleham News is published, the deadline will have passed for having your say on where the polling stations are in the village. I know some residents have in the past expressed to me concern about having polling stations at both the Village Hall and the Old School and that in the past they were all located at the Old School.

I have spoken with the officers at West Lindsey and relayed these concerns, but I think for the moment the current situation is likely to be maintained. If you feel strongly about this issue I would very much welcome hearing from you and you never know, we might be able to get a change in time for the local and general elections in 2015.

E-Newsletter I write a monthly e-newsletter for which anyone can sign up and which is full of the latest, most up-to-date information on what I have been up to as your district councillor.

You can sign up for it by visiting: http://eepurl.com/syLaD. 43

And finally…

I am genuinely disappointed that the vacated Linelands site on All Saints Lane remains boarded up - I pass it almost everyday when walking into the village centre. I had expected to hear that progress was being made in finding a private developer to redevelop the derelict site into a new elderly ‘extra care’ home.

I continue to make representations to the County Council demanding that action is taken to bring the site back into use.

If you have a problem or issue related to our community, or the council, please do get in touch with me. I am here to help you (contact details below).

Cllr Giles McNeill

West Lindsey District Councillor Malcolm Leaning 11 Highfields, Nettleham Lincoln LN2 2ST Telephone 01522 873175 Email Malcolm.leaning@ntlworld.com

West Lindsey District Councillor Giles McNeill 3 The Chestnuts, Nettleham Lincoln LN2 2NH Telephone 07896 730737 Email Cllr.G.McNeill@west-lindsey.gov.uk

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Nettleham Cricket Club: David Wheatley has spent over 20 years with the Club in various roles, most notably as Chairman on two occasions between 1999 and 2006. Through his efforts the Club has progressed from a small village club to one that has four senior and six youth sides! David will remain within the Club to assist with grants and fundraising.

The heavy winter rain which affected the west of the country so badly has thankfully not materialised at Nettleham, so work on the cricket square over the winter has been able to progress well.

Club President and groundsman, John Dingley, reports that at the end of last season the pitches on the square, eroded through wear and tear, were repaired and fertiliser applied in November. In unusually mild winter conditions, the grass has grown well and was cut and spiked in mid January in readiness for further fertiliser in February. This hard work is necessary to produce the outstanding pitches at Nettleham and the Club appreciate all the effort both he and Dave Ranshaw put in.

Martin Strawson & Melanie Reeve

Clubman of the Year: Danny McCardell Junior Clubman of the Year: Shared between Jordan McCardell and Deklan Binnington At the Club’s AGM in November, the following officials were elected:

John Dingley, David Wheatley and Dave Ranshaw

The artificial practice surfaces are also in need of repair and it is increasingly difficult to secure grants towards the upkeep and development of the Club’s facilities.

President: John Dingley Chairman: Martin Connor Vice-chairman: Luke Pickering Secretary: Louise Bromfield Treasurer: Eamonn Moore Fixture Secretary: David Ranshaw Junior Co-ordinators: Russ Binnington & Colin Hopkirk

Russ Binnington

Russ Binnington not only brought his talented aggressive style of playing to the 1st XI, he also brought a more professional outlook to the 1st team. He has recently moved onto the coaching side and spent time gaining the coaching awards and accreditation that is required to coach our juniors. We are pleased that Russ will remain with the Club as the Head Coach.

We are very grateful to Councillor Giles McNeill who has kindly agreed to donate £750 from his local Councillor Initiative Fund. This will enable the carpet to be replaced at the bowlers’ end of the nets, and the rest of the Astroturf to be lifted, regraded and levelled before the start of the 2014 season, making sure everything is safe and secure for Club members.

In September the Senior Presentation was held at The Stag’s Head, Lincoln and the following awards were made: Saturday 1st XI Batting: Tom Dalton Bowling: Simon Grocott Saturday 2nd XI Batting: Martin Strawson Bowling: Martin Strawson Sunday 1st XI Batting: Josh Taylor Bowling: Alex Willerton Sunday 2nd XI Batting: Guy Hardcastle Bowling: Deklan Binnington Club Fielder of the Year: Jade Baker Club Spin Bowler: K Samunderu Club All Rounder: Martin Strawson

Jack Curtis

Saturday 1st XI Captain: Jack Curtis Saturday 2nd XI Captain: Chris Dobbs Sunday 1st XI Captain: TBC Sunday 2nd XI Captain: Jade Baker At the Club AGM two of the senior posts changed hands, with the Club Secretary, David Wheatley, handing over to Louise Bromfield and Jack Curtis taking over the 1st XI captain duties from Russ Binnington.

David and Russ were a formidable partnership which saw the 1st XI winning the Lincolnshire Premier League in 2005, and promotion to the top league within the county: the ECB Premier League.

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Colin & Emma Woolfson

The meeting also saw Luke Pickering taking over from Colin Woolfson as Vice Chairman. Colin has served the Club for over 10 years, both as a player as well as Vice-Chairman and the Club is grateful he will continue to stay involved, reporting back from Mulsanne Users’ Meetings.

Details on winter nets for both Seniors and Juniors are as follows. As always, everyone is welcome to join the Club at any age, group and ability, so please do come along.

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2014 Juniors: Friday evenings at Lincoln Minster School, 14 February - 4 April inclusive.

U9s: 6.30 - 7.30pm U10s and 11s: 7.30 - 8.30pm U13s and 15s: 8.30 - 9.30pm Outdoor nets start on Friday 25 April at Mulsanne Park

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The Artisan Skill of the Master Upholsterer is Flourishing in Lincolnshire The county of Lincolnshire used to be full of people making things and everything could be sourced and produced locally.

Mass production and international importing weren’t issues and so a thriving specialist craft industry flourished.

The upholsterer was one of the key crafts at the heart of the local community.

If you require any further information, please don’t hesitate to contact the Club Junior Co-ordinator Colin Hopkirk: colinhopkirk171@btinternet.com

A renewed interest in custom, handmade items, vintage styles and environmentally conscious consumption is now reviving interest in quality upholstery.

Seniors: Friday evenings at Christ’s Hospital School, starting 7 February and running for 8 weeks: 6.30 - 8.30pm.

“People often used to get their furniture reupholstered, but then it got cheaper and cheaper,” comments Edward Crowther, Founder and Managing Director of Lincoln master upholsterer: Crowther & Sons (advertisement on page 16). “But what appears to be a Rolls Royce on the outside can actually be cheap, poor quality on the inside. Now, people are starting to realize that older pieces last longer.”

If you have any queries, please contact the 1st XI captain Jack Curtis on: 07798 928176.

The Junior County squads for 2014 have been announced and the following players were selected from Nettleham Cricket Club: U11: Alex Howes U12: Charlie Elliott U14: Deklan Binnington U14B: Lewis Bromfield U15B: Thomas Lea U17: Alex Willerton Girls U15: Elise Keyworth Also, added to the Girls U13 Development squad for 2014: Mia Ashworth & Hermione Hunter-Evison.

The Central Lincs Regional Squads for 2014 include the following Nettleham Players: U10: Pranav Pothula & Guy Hinchliffe U11: Dan Hopkirk U12: Haydn Bromfield U13: Jack Thornton Also in the County & Regional Awards for 2013, the following Nettleham Junior players won awards: County Boys U17 Best Bowler: Adi Sreedharan County Girls U15 Best Bowler: Elise Keyworth Regional Boys U11 Best Bowler: Haydn Bromfield League Boys U11 Best Batsman: Charlie Elliott

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Built to last using traditional techniques, each piece of furniture produced at Crowther & Sons is lovingly crafted by an experienced workforce in the Nettleham workshops helping to preserve and nurture the future of Lincolnshire craftsmanship.

“Traditional upholstery is about quality you know it will last thirty years or more.

Starting with the frame and working out how to do everything, that’s the joy of it.

I’ve always liked to build something up, take it from frame to finished job and see people appreciate my work,” comments Edward, who now has a team of cabinet makers and upholsterers working alongside him, including eldest son Ed Junior, a fellow master upholsterer and youngest son, Daniel at the start of his apprenticeship.

“When it comes to furniture, it’s what is inside that really counts. In today’s market, that’s often cheap materials and an inadequate particle-board frame instead of

All the winter preparation has taken place to enable all club players to look forward to the opening of what is hoped will be an enjoyable and successful cricket season.

If you would like additional information about Nettleham Cricket Club, the club can be reached by email at: cricket@nettlehamcc.co.uk Information about the Cub can be found at: www.nettlehamcc.co.uk 45

real wood. You could have three chairs that all look the same, but take them apart and every one is different. That means that in addition to patience, the trade requires a lot of know-how - something that’s becoming increasingly scarce.”

At Crowther & Sons, the fusion of both state-of-the-art modern and traditional fillings combines the best of both worlds with the overriding emphasis on quality of materials and construction.

“It’s very satisfying making something with your hands, you have something to show for your efforts when the job is done,” adds Edward. “It’s not an easy job you need to have a good understanding of shape and form, structure and depth; you need to be a tailor, a carpenter, a problem-solver and also an artist” adds Edward.

“It’s nice to update the style, in light of that ethos of renewal and recycling, to give it a more modern feel,” adds Edward’s eldest son and fellow master upholsterer, Ed Junior. “There’s a lot of older furniture that’s in fantastic condition. It has great bones, it’s perfectly strong, the frames are great, but unfortunately it looks old.

Once it is reupholstered it can easily work for another 15 to 20 years.”

“Our decisions as master upholsterers are made with integrity and respect for the artisan works and skills of times gone by.

By reupholstering original pieces you add to that story and make it something that will provide enjoyment to someone for years to come,” adds Edward.

Crowther & Sons represents the very best in Lincolnshire craftsmanship to a growing regional and national audience. This local company is leading the way to train and produce the next generation of skilled master upholsterers ensuring the skill continues to flourish in the county for many years to come.

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All Saints Parish Church A Pastoral Message from Revd Richard Crossland, Rural Dean of Lawres “Mad March days” is a well-known phrase, from John Masefield’s poem “Cargoes”.

We talk of Mad March gales. As mad as a March hare. It is clearly a wild time in our imaginations! Writing this in February after two of the wildest and wettest months we can remember, we find it hard to imagine March being any wilder! It is a time when we sometimes feel unsettled, and yet it is a time when we look forward to better things to come, to shoots pushing from the ground and buds forming on the trees.

lifestyle and of the way you treat your body. Choose the right things to give up and it might make you more aware and sympathetic about the lives of others.

Use what you save to support a charity.

When you are hit by the craving, offer it to God in prayer and thanksgiving for what you normally enjoy. Add some reading to your daily lifestyle for Lent, pop into church (they are all open) for a quiet time with God. Join a group. Come to church more often. Come for the first time.

The seasons have a terrific effect on us, and serve to remind us that we live our own lives in a rhythm of patterns and change, and make us aware, sometimes painfully aware, of the natural world and the planet God gave us to take care of.

Some of us make it our annual detox.

I usually give up alcohol which I find easy, and coffee which I find hard. When I was ‘coming off coffee’ my children used to say “Daddy is giving up coffee and being nice to people”, which I hope was a joke!

Everyone can benefit from six weeks of being careful about something. It helps to establish the pattern of the year. It helps to make you more aware of your normal

The Swedish Christian and 1950’s UN Secretary General Dag Hammarskjöld had a wonderful and challenging prayer that totally captures this challenge of Lent and also this ‘between time’ of our parish vacancy. He prayed “For all that has been, thank you. For all that is to come, yes!”.

Saying thanks for ALL we have done, experienced and seen, whether we liked it or not, is a wonderful and challenging Christian response. To say yes to all the future offers, is the Christian optimism about the ultimate goodness of God that makes our religion special.

We are making excellent progress on the work to define our needs and recruit a new priest. The fabulous news is that the diocese has agreed with us that these parishes represent some of the best opportunities in Lincolnshire for good Christian work, for deepening faith and bringing others to that faith - in short to grow, and therefore we are appointing not one, but two priests.

March sees the beginning of the church’s season of Lent on Wednesday 5th. The word literally just means “spring”, but we associate it with ‘giving things up’. Like March itself, Lent is both a time of cold self-examination and of optimistic looking forward. Worship in church is traditionally a bit more dour. Sombre purple replaces the gold and white we have had since the joy of Christmas. We leave out some of the expressions of joy, like the “Glory to God in the highest”. We avoid saying alleluia! No flowers. We have the chance to add some study or prayer to our lives in Lent groups.

Giving something up is a seasonal tradition in many religions. In Islam there is the month of Ramadan, when everyone takes fasting much more seriously than we Christians do, taking no food or drink between sunrise and sunset. We can learn a lot from the reasoning behind Muslims’ fasting. They learn it is to make them aware of God’s generosity when they do have food. That it is to feel hunger so they are reminded to pray. They believe it is a personal action through which they praise God, and a shared action through which they build the solidarity of their faith. They understand fasting gives them sympathy for the poor. They are encouraged to give to those in need the value of that which they give up.

Not just what we do on a Sunday, but what we are as people and community.

I like to think of Lent as a personal spring-clean. It looks back at what we have got wrong, but more importantly looks forward to Holy Week and Easter, when we remember Christ’s dying for all of us on the cross, and when we celebrate his rising from death, bringing us hope and joy.

Do try it yourself this year - meaningfully, prayerfully and generously.

Nettleham and Riseholme will have their own priest again, and Welton, Dunholme and Scothern will have their own priest.

This will truly be a time of opportunity.

There is a chance that by the time of the next Nettleham News we will have made appointments and we will be preparing to welcome new vicars to lead our churches.

Until then, thanks to the generosity of local clergy and the hard work of your ministry teams, it is business as usual with a full programme of activities and the opportunity to follow and be part of the great drama of Holy Week. To walk with the Lord into Jerusalem, to watch with Him in the garden, to weep before his cross, and to meet Him, risen, in the street.

Do please participate.

Being a Christian is not just one of a number of possible Sunday hobbies, it is a whole way of life. A whole way of living and being, and relating to each other. Our Christian communities in Nettleham and Riseholme and in Welton, Dunholme and Scothern are alive and well, but also feel there is much to do.

So out of this mad March, signs of spring will emerge. Out of this Lent, hope for the transformation of our lives and salvation for us and our world will be revealed at Easter. Out of this period of vacancy and prayer and planning, a new clarity of purpose will emerge, along with the priests to lead that.

A period of vacancy - we have been without a Parish Priest since Jenny Rowley left in September - is a time for looking back, like Lent, and saying sorry where it has been wrong and saying thank you where it has been good. It is a time of looking forward, and asking what does our life, work and witness need for the future.

For all that has been, thank you. For all that is to come, yes!

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God bless you.

Revd Richard Crossland Rural Dean of Lawres

Email: rcrossland@voxhumana.co.uk 01522 730535

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SERVICES AND FORTHCOMING EVENTS

RVS LINCOLNSHIRE

Including Holy Week and Easter

Community Transport Scheme

All Saints Church, Nettleham, unless otherwise stated All other services as normal

Ash Wednesday 5 March

Holy Saturday 19 April

2.30pm A service for Ash Wednesday with imposition of ashes

8.00pm The Paschal Vigil and the First Eucharist of Easter with Lighting of the New Fire and Paschal Candle, and renewal of Baptismal vows

7.30pm Sung Eucharist for Ash Wednesday with imposition of ashes

Mothering Sunday 30 March 8.00am Eucharist 9.30am Family Eucharist for the 4th Sunday of Lent with distribution of Mothering Sunday flowers 11.15am Holy Communion at St Mary’s, Riseholme (using traditional language)

Palm Sunday 13 April

At the conclusion of this service there will be refreshments as we celebrate the glory of the Resurrection, and our joy at being God’s Easter people

Easter Day 20 April 8.00am Said Eucharist 9.30am Parish Eucharist… and Easter eggs 11.15am Holy Communion at St Mary’s, Riseholme (using traditional language)

Sunday 27 April 8.00am Eucharist

8.00am Eucharist with distribution and blessing of palms

9.30am Sung Eucharist followed by Annual Parochial Church Meeting

9.30am Family Eucharist with distribution and blessing of palms and procession

11.15am Morning Prayer at St Mary’s Riseholme

11.15am Morning Prayer at St Mary’s, Riseholme

Holy Week Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday 14/15/16 April 7.30pm Monday Stations of the Cross 7.30pm Tuesday Stabat Mater by Pergolesi with sopranos Margaret Crossland and Wendy Leonard and instrumental ensemble 7.30pm Wednesday Quiet Eucharist

Maundy Thursday 17 April 7.30pm Sung Eucharist with Washing of Feet, Stripping of Altars, Watch until Midnight

Good Friday 18 April 10.00 - 11.30am An Easter Happening activities for children. Pre-booking essential telephone: 01522 595969 12.00 Two hours of silence, hymns and devotions, led by the Ven Tim Barker, and Revds Richard Thornton, Julia Hart and Richard Crossland 2.00pm The Liturgy of the Lord’s Passion with the Reading of the Passion Gospel, Proclamation of the Cross, and Distribution of Holy Communion.

From the Parish Registers

The Royal Voluntary Service Community Transport is a volunteer driver door-to-door scheme that gives older people the freedom to get out and about.

For instance we can help: ● To visit family or friends ● To go to a lunch club ● To go shopping ● To attend any health appointments ● To simply go for a drive The cost for any journey is based on the mileage. Just tell us where you would like to go and we will give you a cost for the journey.

To find out more about the Royal Voluntary Service Lincolnshire Community Transport Scheme Telephone 01522 305313

We welcome into the Family of God’s Church through Holy Baptism:

Mobile 07436 580251

3 November Annabel Matthews Owen Marcroft 15 December Evan Parker 5 January Isabelle Dawson

lincolntransport@royalvoluntary service.org.uk

We share in the joy of those being married in the Church:

4 January Timothy Wilson and Claire Rowley We share in the sadness of those who mourn the death of a loved one, remembering those whose funeral has taken place, or cremated remains have been laid to rest:

11 November 14 November 20 November 22 November 29 November 3 December 9 December 31 December 14 January 23 January

Vera Chamberlin Frank Lockwood Donald Green Effie Mansfield Ella Kilby Roy Boyer Diane Wilburn Marjorie Mayes Eda Norris Elizabeth Dixon

Email

Facebook www.facebook.com/RoyalVoluntary ServiceLincolnshire

Twitter www.twitter.com/royalvolslincs

Royal Voluntary Service Together for older people RVS website www.royalvoluntaryservice.org.uk

(cremated remains)

28 January 29 January 29 January

Monica West Albert Strawson John Blakely

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We’ve changed our name from WRVS to Royal Voluntary Service to make what we do much clearer to everyone

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RB Camera Club Programme March - June 2014 Would you like to improve your camera skills?

Then why don’t you come to your local ‘Foto Forum’?

RB Camera Club, which meets weekly on a Friday evening at 7.30pm in Nettleham Village Hall, is starting a forum for those wishing to develop their camera skills.

Initially it will be for beginners, or those with a little knowledge, but will eventually move on to more advanced techniques.

Anyone interested should email rbcameraclub@gmail.com with their name, camera model and level of ability, or drop the information in on a club night.

The first meeting of the forum will be on 5 April 2014 at Nettleham Old School where basic techniques will be covered.

The forum will start at 10.00am and go on for 2 hours.

It is hoped that forum members will determine future topics, meeting times, etc, at this first and further meetings.

Lionel Moore Foto Forum Leader, RB Camera Club

March 2014 07 March Erica Oram CPAGB BPE1 “Kicking the Velvia Habit” Travelling from Sheffield, Erica is showing her landscape and street images

14 March Competition: “Scape” (Prints)

09 May Flora and Fauna Competition: (digital) Judge Andrew: Parsons ARPS DPAGB

16 May LPA Folio The touring print exhibition of images from members of LPA clubs

23 May Robert Falconer “Cuba”

Judge: Robert Falconer

21 March “Images of Indochina” Colin New, London Salon member from Sheffield returns

28 March Dave Thompson “Burma” A pleasant return for local travel photographer Dave with images of a country usually seen on the news!

April 2014 04 April Les Nixon DPAGB BPE4* “Contrasts” Les travels from Hathersage to give a presentation with the emphasis on contrast between, or within, an image

11 April Show and Tell An evening’s entertainment provided by members

25 April Ian Newton ARPS “High speed Humming Bird Photography” Ian travels from Skelton Near York to give us the lowdown on multiple flash techniques

May 2014 02 May Peter Crichton FRGS “Hidden Gems” A journey to 10 less well known places from every continent on the planet!

Rob returns to show his stunning images of trains, people and the Cuban landscape

30 May Informal meeting No agenda, no formality, no fee Members show their images and the odd tutorial thrown in

June 2014 Martin Yates “Serial Photographer” Martin returns with more of his well-observed moments in time

12 June LPA Battle: Grimsby, RBCC and Dunholme at Dunholme

13 June Club Member Tony hosts our “Portrait Night” Bring your cameras!

20 June Colin Brenchley “No Particular Place to Go” AV’s on a number of subjects and places

27 June Ian Pinn “Your Turn” Ian has judged numerous times at RB, but tonight he puts his head above the parapet and shows some of his own images!

Photograph of Nettleham Village Hall, venue for RB Camera Club meetings, by Steve Haw

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Neighbourhood Plan Update January 2014 The past three months has seen the Neighbourhood Plan Committee busy looking at issues in the village such as housing site assessment, traffic and parking, commercial needs, environmental and infrastructure issues and we are close to the point of starting to produce policies to form a coherent plan.

When we have a Neighbourhood Plan in place the Parish Council will be eligible for a 25% share of the Community Infrastructure Levy (CIL). The CIL provides for a payback, from developers to the local community, to compensate for the disruption caused by a new development.

A figure of 75% of the CIL will go to WLDC/County Council to cover various requirements in the county including a contribution to new roads, etc.

Estate roads, sewers and other infrastructure for new building will come under a Section 106 planning agreement as usual. However, 25% of the CIL will go to the community for things which are not specifically related to the development.

We will have the discretion to spend that CIL money on community-based infrastructure to make life better for the existing inhabitants of the village.

Taking into account previous consultations in the village, the Parish Council has drawn up a prioritised list of possibilities.

We would be very interested to hear from residents as to whether you would agree with the list and order of priority. Please feel free to add other items to the list and prioritise them as you see fit. It would also be useful if you would rate each item on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being not required and 10 being most desirable.

1 Care home 2 New car park in village centre 3 New Scout hut 4 Car park for Junior School 5 Expansion of sports facilities (cricket, football, skate park) 6 New woodland, walks and allotments Clearly a new care home would cost a lot more than we could hope to receive in CIL money, but giving it a high priority here would provide encouragement for us to seek potential partners for this.

I might add that some developers have offered some of these benefits to the village in exchange for support in future planning applications. However, we need to know what the community think are most important.

Please provide your response to the Parish office by letter, or alternatively email: parishcouncil@nettleham.info by not later than 15 March 2014 and giving a preference ranking.

To provide an idea of the potential value of the CIL money which could be received by the Parish, based on rough estimates, it would equate to approximately £85,000 per 100 homes, so helpful - but not vast.

We would also like to know what you think about alternative methods of communication such as a website specifically for the Neighbourhood Plan, or the use of Facebook. Would this encourage more engagement from the community?

We would of course continue to use Nettleham News as a communication channel.

We are a small team of dedicated volunteers working on the plan for the future of the village. This is another chance for you to tell us what you would like to see, so that we can try to build it into the plan. Please let us know what you think now.

Thank you.

Nettleham Methodist Church

A good time was had by all!

‘Messy Church’ was filled with noise and excitement as children and adults explored the Christmas story together through craft, music, story and refreshments.

But ‘Messy Church’ isn’t just for Christmas, each month (usually on the 3rd Sunday) will have a different theme, but follow a similar format of activities, music, story and prayers followed by a simple meal together to finish. Why not come and see for yourself what happens?

Make a note of these dates: March 16 Theme: Creation April 13 Theme: Palm Sunday/Easter (please note this is 2nd Sunday)

May 18 Theme: The Good Shepherd

Easter is a busy period in the Church calendar, with extra services and a special event this year, to which all are welcome.

Church Diary Saturday 12 April Coffee Morning for Brazil Mission 10.00am - 12noon Sunday 13 April Palm Sunday Services 9.00am & 10.45am Messy Church 3.00pm Tuesday 15 to Sunday 20 April The Mystery Exhibition: Why Good Friday?

An exhibition of arts and crafts by local artists

Open daily (opening times vary) Friday 18 April Good Friday Meditation 9.30am Sunday 20 April Easter Sunday - Traditional Service 9.00am Café Church All-Age Celebration 4.00pm 49

Cllr John Evans

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Why Men are Happier and More Content Not to be taken too seriously... vive la difference!

Well what do you expect from such simple creatures?

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes

Your last name stays the same for life

Everything on your face stays its original colour

The garage is all yours Wedding plans take care of themselves

The same hairstyle lasts for years, even decades

Chocolate is just another snack

You only have to shave your face and neck

You can never be pregnant

You can play with toys all your life

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water-park

One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons

You can wear NO shirt to a water-park

You can wear shorts, no matter how your legs look

Car mechanics tell you the truth The world is your urinal

You can ‘do’ your nails with a pocket knife

You never have to drive to another petrol station because this one is just too icky

You have freedom of choice about growing a moustache

You don’t have to stop and think which way to turn a nut on a bolt

You can do Christmas shopping for 30 relatives on 24 December in 25 minutes flat

Same work, more pay Wrinkles add character Wedding dress: £3,000 Suit rental: £100 People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them New shoes don’t cut, blister or otherwise mangle your feet One mood all the time (usually!)

Telephone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat You know stuff about tanks A five-day vacation requires just the one suitcase You can open all your own jars You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend Your underwear is £4.95 for a three-pack Three pairs of shoes are more than enough You almost never have strap problems in public

No wonder men are happier!

NICKNAMES If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah If Mike, Robert and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bobbo and Wildman EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in £20, even though it’s only for £50 None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators MONEY A man will pay £2 for a £1 item he needs A woman will pay £1 for a £2 item that she doesn’t need, but it’s in a sale BATHROOMS A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap and a towel 50

The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 297 A man wouldn’t be able to identify more than about 20 of these items ARGUMENTS A woman has the last word in any argument Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument FUTURE A woman worries about the future, until she gets a husband A man never worries about the future, until he gets a wife MARRIAGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but of course he doesn’t A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but of course she does DRESSING UP A woman will dress up to: go shopping, water the plants, empty the rubbish bin, answer the telephone or door, read a book and fetch the post A man will dress up for weddings and funerals NATURAL Men wake up as good-looking as when they went to bed Women somehow deteriorate during the night OFFSPRING A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house AND FINALLY...

A married man should forget his mistakes - there’s no point in two people remembering the same thing!

But of course, if you ladies know differently...

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Jaime Blake: a Man for All Seasons A man for all seasons and the right reasons at Bressingham. Jaime Blake in conversation with Jane McInerney.

“How did I get into horticulture? Well, originally I trained to teach, thank heavens no one would employ me! I then went on to work in Peterborough parks department and, when I later decided to move on, the opportunity of joining Alan Bloom at Bressingham presented itself.

“Alan was in his eighties when I arrived and he spent quite a bit of his time showing me how he accomplished various tasks and also backed this knowledge up by writing things down for me; I think I fitted the mould here.

“I was not so qualified as some of my predecessors, who had ideas of changing and developing Alan’s 6-acre garden. I’m more of a looker-afterer and not someone with ambitions to make my own mark and I think Alan saw in me someone he could trust to look after his treasured creation.

I’ve been here 25 years now and I can’t remember when I took over the reins, so to speak, it was more of a gradual process.

“Alan gave me quite a lot of freedom in The Dell garden, allowing me to change practices... as long as he could see an improvement and this gave me plenty of scope and let me develop my own skills.

“There have been many changes here at Blooms over the years and a lot of people who used to work here have moved on.

Those who come back to visit say it gives them a happy feeling to see the garden hasn’t suffered as a result... a constant in a world of change in which we all live.

“The other gardens that form part of The Bressingham Gardens have been developed

by Alan’s son, Adrian Bloom (starting with Foggy Bottom and more recently the area known as Adrian’s Wood) overall they cover some 17 acres.

“My place is definitely in Alan’s garden... although recently my work has expanded in a different direction and concerns the farm and estate, as we are developing some environmental schemes on some of the waste nursery land and also changing the way that some of the farm is used.

“I’m also involved in a couple of RHS committees: Trials and the Herbaceous Plant Committee. I’m also an ex-Chairman of Norfolk Plant Heritage.

“As part of my Curatorial work, I believe it’s important for me to help keep alive the memory of Alan Bloom and what he did here. So, when I have the opportunity I enjoying talking to various groups about him, hoping it will provide some insight into Alan Bloom the man, show his motivations and ambitions, as well as the incredible journey he took to end up at Bressingham.

“I’m also trying to continue with some of the work on plant groups which were important to Alan and, as a result of this, I have some very interesting new plants which I hope will make their way in to cultivation in due course.

“Persicaria amplexicaule ‘Pink Knot’ and Astrantia ‘Pink Crush’ are examples of this, as well as two AGM plants: Kniphofia ‘Penny Rockets’ and Phlox paniculata ‘Pearl the Girl’.

“There are a couple of new plants though, in particular, which I’m particularly excited about and I feel they are really better than anything so far... but we’ll have to wait and see. All of these plants can be termed properly garden-worthy and are not just flash-in-the-pan items which end up not being hardy.”

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THE SPICE OF LIFE! On Saturday 10 May 2014 Scothern has the honour of hosting the

Lincoln Orpheus Male Voice Choir at 7.30pm in St Germain’s historic parish church, Scothern, with guest appearance by well-known local vocal group

FUSION+ and an Interval Raffle with excellent prizes including Emma Bridgewater china Tickets in advance: £10 including glass of wine and nibbles from Jan Kenworthy

01673 861345 Proceeds to Friends of St Germain’s www.friends-of-st-germains.org Meetings usually on the first Thursday of the month, 7.30pm in the Bottle & Glass, Scothern You are welcome!

Jaime Blake Jaime Blake will be talking to the Lincolnshire Group of the Hardy Plant Society on the 10 April, 2014, the society of which Alan Bloom was one of the co-founders and its first Chairman.

I would say that Alan Bloom would be simply delighted with his son-in-law’s achievements and his legacy is in very safe hands, The Dell Garden is truly flourishing.

I’ve stayed at Bressingham Hall on a number of occasions in the past and in the early morning, before the visitors arrive, Jaime can be seen with his clipboard making a tour of the island beds and taking notes, or whizzing around on the ride-on mower sprucing up the lawn around some of the island beds - nurturing and attention to detail is a very important aspect of his work.

If you haven’t visited Bressingham yet and experienced its magic atmosphere, why not make a New Year’s Resolution to do so? It’s a paradise for any gardener or garden lover.

Jane McInerney

Jaime Blake: Alan Bloom: a thinker and doer William Farr Church of England School, Lincoln Road, Welton, Lincoln LN2 3JB Thursday 10 April 2014 at 7.30pm. Doors open: 6.30pm Tickets: £5.00 (includes refreshments) 51

CBSI UK is a non-denominational independent Christian ministry dedicated to providing accessible, in-depth Bible study in a supportive group setting, open to everyone, men and women of all ages.

It provides a simple four-step approach to studying God’s word: Individual Study Discussion ● Teaching ● Commentary ● ●

The new Nettleham class will start Tuesday 29 April 2014 10.00 -12.00am Nettleham Methodist Church For further information Sandy Gould 01522 751087

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Nettleham Ladies Football Club Nettleham Ladies was formed at the start of the 2008/09 season when the current Nettleham Ladies and Nettleham Ladies Reserves amalgamated into one team.

Since the very beginning there have been many players involved within the team, coaches, managers and volunteers and although the look of the Nettleham team is very different today than that of the one that began in 2008/09 season, they still have great similarities.

Nettleham Ladies has always had that community club feel about it and it is most definitely a bubbly atmosphere that surrounds our club - although we are a hard-working squad at that.

One thing that continues to run through the current squad, as it did of that 5 years ago, is the want and desire to succeed and gain results. Over the years Nettleham Ladies has seen many successes from winning leagues and gaining promotion, to winning cups and making history.

Last season saw Nettleham Ladies make history when they became only the third name on the County Women’s Cup ever after defeating former champions Scunthorpe in the semi-final, followed by an emphatic underdog’s performance against Lincoln Ladies in the final to clinch the cup.

Nettleham Ladies has gone from strength to strength since this victory and whilst opening our doors to some new, experienced and fantastic players, we have also unfortunately seen some former players leave the club to pursue other aspects of their lives.

We have had quite a rollercoaster of a season so far and although we had a great run in the FA cup and to date are pulling off some great performances in the league and cup competitions, a shaky three games has seen us lose vital points that were essential for us to fulfil our ambition and gain promotion to the East Midlands Combinations League next year.

We have also lost vital players through injury, but Paul Durrand is working wonders with the squad/club to ensure that the results are maintained. We have to bear in mind that although the women’s game is growing, with the loss of Lincoln Ladies to Notts County, we may well be the top female side in the county.

However we are still very much reliant on the volunteers that endeavour to support our club such as our manager Paul Durrand. Without some of the support and sponsorship we have received this year from Eric Whitelock, Rob and Doreen Lunn and the Cambian

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group, then we would cease to exist and your ongoing support is so gratefully received.

Nettleham Ladies would all love to see more supporters down at Muslanne Park following our games and cheering us on from time to time. Nettleham is such a great village and we have attracted a core of loyal fans that have been vital to the results in many of our games this season. One thing we always manage to do is to put on a good show for the spectators and we are always pleased to socialise with individuals - the best thing about the club is that it feels just like one big family.

The ladies are committed to continue bringing in the points and would love to retain the county cup. We all know that it is essential we do well, not only for the club, but so that there is a place for upcoming young girls to be able to compete and participate in football at a higher level for those that want it.

Stay in touch through our website: www.nettlehamladies.co.uk and Twitter: @Nettlehamladies or via Facebook Nettleham Ladiesfc Leanne Woodhead Nettleham Ladies Captain

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WHAT IS THE FORGOTTEN ASPECT OF HEALTH & FITNESS THAT NO ONE TALKS ABOUT? Over the last twelve months I’ve been doing some serious investigation and study into fitness and wellbeing and the word that keeps coming up, over and over again, is mobility. All the health and medical professionals I’ve consulted agree on this one thing: that the key to continuing and lasting health and an active lifestyle is the ability to keep moving freely without aches, pains or stiffness.

Yes, building up your strength is important; yes, keeping your weight within limits is important; yes, eating a good balanced diet is important.

But all these things fade into insignificance if you can’t kneel down, or you suffer from a bad back, or if you’re stiff when you get out of a chair. Everyone agrees: FLEXIBILITY is the answer, but why is not talked about more?

I’ll tell you: it’s just not sexy! You can’t show your muscles off in front of a mirror, you can’t admire yourself for the weight you’ve lost - so it tends to get forgotten in fitness programmes, or briefly tacked onto the end.

Now let me tell you a secret: I’ve been a fitness professional for nearly ten years, but I suffer with a long-standing back injury. And as a result I have felt stiff and achy for most of the time.

I’ve been to every type of back specialist, but surprisingly, developing flexibility to overcome the problem is rarely talked about. So that’s why I decided to do all this investigation and study, to create a programme that would not just ease my particular problem, but also help all my clients who find that they can no longer do the things they used to do, who can’t move as easily as formerly and who are not as agile as they were years ago. Some of them have specific problems like mine: a bad back or injured knees, but some of them are just feeling the effects of “not being as young as they used to be”.

Or they’re simply inflexible! In fact, suppleness is so important that anyone from 18 to 80 could gain significant benefit from it.

As a result, together with one of my Senior Trainers, I’ve developed a special introductory six-week Movement & Flexibility Programme.

It’s designed for you to do alone in one of our private studios with a fitness professional who will take you through all the movements of the body. The hour starts with controlled dynamic stretches and a series of mobility moves, but for the majority of time you will be lying down and relaxing whilst the trainer gives you a series of advanced assisted stretches. We’ve found that a relaxed state is by far the best way to achieve real increases in flexibility.

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Bishop’s Palace Update January 2014 Dogs In both this and previous editions of Nettleham News concerns have been voiced about the level of dog mess on the Bishop’s Palace Site.

Many people now value the site as a place of recreation and it’s a shame that a few unthoughtful dog owners use the site to exercise their dogs without clearing up after them. Bins have been provided for this purpose at both entrances.

This has necessitated the Steering Group to review and recommend some policy changes for the use of the site to the Parish Council. We don’t want to ban dogs from the site, but we feel it’s vital that we also protect the children who will also be running around on the site. Bacteria present in dog faeces can be very dangerous to children, should they come into contact with it.

The Parish Council has decided to erect notices advising dog owners that their dogs should now be kept on leads and that they should clear up after their dog.

The situation will be monitored over a 12-month period and if it is found that dog fouling continues, then the council will be forced to consider imposing a complete ban on the exercise of dogs on the Bishop’s Palace Site.

If you see anyone not clearing up after their dog, please advise them that failing to do so could risk exclusion of all dog walkers from using the site in future.

Dry Stone Wall 15 metres of the old dry stone wall to the south of the meadow area has been rebuilt by volunteers during the course of last summer and looks great. Further funding has now been applied for from Cory Trust to complete the remaining 40 metres of the wall (a big job!).

Heritage Orchard We now have 15 heritage species of apple tree on order and plan to clear the ground on the 15 February ready for planting on the 8 March. We should thank Chrissie Clayton for her work in identifying and sourcing the trees and her guidance on planting.

Wild Flower Meadow The wildflower meadow which was sown last August has become established with a good germination rate, so we expect to see a wonderful display in the spring/early summer, and even better in 2015.

Woodland Area The 20 or so of the trees that were planted last winter and failed to survive have now been replaced and weed killing around the base of the trees continues to ensure that the trees get a good start without too much competition from the couch grass.

Thanks go to Nettleham Woodland Trust for all their help and support in the meadow area.

Actitivies in the Meadow We are now in the position to make real use of the meadow area, and are starting to get this underway initially with Nettleham Junior School producing a short film about the history of the site.

In addition, under the guidance of the Bishop Grosseteste Community Archaeologist, children from Nettleham Junior School will be digging a number of 1 square metre exploratory trenches at various locations around the meadow area and recording their finds.

Unfortunately it is not practical at this time to attempt this on the Scheduled Ancient Monument section of the site, due to the strict controls in place regarding digging within a SAM. Cllr John Evans

We’ve been running this programme in our branch in Northamptonshire for several months now and we’ve had remarkable results - from improved mood to touching the toes for the first time in years!

The studios are in use for much of the time so there only limited places available, but if you’d like to try this innovative programme, give the Lincoln Studio Manager, Tristan Lowe a call.

Ian Ryves Managing Director, Wellbeing Fitness

Photograph by Cllr John Evans

(see advertisement on facing page)

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Knitting Wools

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Patterns & Buttons

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Needles & Accessories

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Kits for Scarves, Cushions & Bags

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Range of Hand-Knitted Garments

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Knitting-Up Service

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Monthly Knitting Club

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8 Lodge Lane, Nettleham

Welcome to

(near the surgery)

Opening Times Friday: 10.00am - 4.00pm Saturday: 9.00am - 5.00pm

THE WHITE HART

Other times by arrangement

NETTLEHAM

Telephone

01522 752854 or 07794 946830 Email

info@loubylouwools.co.uk

www.loubylouwools.co.uk

For expert legal advice on individual and commercial matters St Swithin’s Court 1 Flavian Road Nettleham Road Lincoln LN2 4GR

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Introducing NEW chef - Mark West

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Cask ales

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NEW lunchtime menu

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Parties and functions catered for

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NEW evening menu

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Function room available

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Weekly specials board

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Your contact

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Senior lunchtime specials

Themed nights - see noticeboard outside for details

Chris Hunter

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EARLY BIRD menu served 5.30 to 7.00pm Wed to Sat 2 meals for £12.00

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Food served 5 days a week

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NEW comfortable seating area in the lounge

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Sunday Roast specials

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All menus with fresh local produce

The White Hart Food Challenge coming soon!

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Children’s menu available

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Beer garden

Telephone

01522 512123 Out of hours telephone 01522 730106 Email: chris.hunter@andrew-solicitors.co.uk

www.andrew-solicitors.co.uk

Come and relax by our open fire

01522 751976 56

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NWT Community Champions at Nettleham Co-op

Nettleham Woodland Trust were chosen to be ‘Community Champions’ in the September to December 2013 period. The amount raised by local shoppers at the store was £793.

The money will be spent on a petrol-driven strimmer for use in Monks Wood and Co-operative Wood, together with the design and printing of a new leaflet for Nettleham Woodland Trust.

Rod Newborough, Dennis Tate and Susie Mendel of Nettleham Woodland Trust are presented with the ‘Community Champions’ cheque for £793.00 by Shaun, Manager of Nettleham Co-op Foodstore

Nettleham Art Group ART & CRAFT SALE Nettleham Art Group held its 7th Annual Art & Craft Sale in the Old School on Saturday 9 November.

It was an opportunity as usual for members to offer for sale any items they had painted or crafted. Admission was free and refreshments were served.

Overall, sales were 30% higher than the previous year with visitor numbers of over one hundred about the same. Greetings cards were the most popular item sold, but framed paintings and prints and craft items such as necklaces, painted pebbles and lavender mice all sold well... and refreshments proved as popular as ever!

Thanks as always to all those members and friends who helped on the day, particularly in the kitchen.

Profits from the sale and donations from visitors enabled the Group to donate £140 to Parkinson’s UK, our charity for 2013.

The Art Group continues to thrive, with a long waiting list. There is very little change in membership from year to year. We are now entering our tenth year since it was formed.

Please make a note now in your diary of our tenth annual exhibition (dates and times are shown on page three of this Nettleham News with full details in the summer edition). Please come along and have a look at the talented artists that live in and around our village - you may find a picture you would like to buy! Most of the paintings in the exhibition are for sale.

Ian Straw Group Organiser

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The Spring Book Review A Commonplace Killing Sian Busby Sian Busby died in September 2012.

She was the wife of the well-known BBC journalist Robert Peston. He discovered the manuscript and arranged for it to be published after her death.

It was chosen as one of the books for the Richard and Judy Book Club.

Known for her impeccable research, this novel accurately places us in post-war Britain from the very first paragraph. Horrible bombed-out areas and scenes of deprivation set the scene for a murder of a highly respectable woman in 1946.

Post-war Britain was not the jubilant, happy-go-lucky place that we might imagine judging from the VE day celebrations. Many people’s lives were horribly fractured and damaged by long separations. Housing was haphazard and folk got by as best as they could, honestly or dishonestly.

Some of the characters seem very undesirable indeed.

The detective assigned to the murder is not a pleasant character, but he is determined to find the killer of this woman. He has issues of his own.

This book was based on a real life case. The fact that Sian Busby wrote it while she was so ill also adds to the poignancy.

The characters will stay with you after you have finished the book. A good read!

Buster’s Diaries as told to Roy Hattersley Having lost my own beloved dog, Rupert last October 2013, I thought that for a while laughter would be difficult.

Then I happened to hear this book being spoken about on the radio and I decided to read it.

I am so glad I did. It is a very clever, funny little book and is written by Buster, Roy Hattersley’s rescued dog (alas no longer with us) and his wry observations of The Man - as he calls Roy Hattersley - are brilliant.

Buster had a horrible start to life and certainly landed on his paws when he was rescued by Roy Hattersley. Despite The Man’s busy political life he is absolutely devoted to Buster and his manipulative, cunning ways. Politics is nothing to Buster. He seems to spend much of his time analysing his Man, getting his own way and showing his stubborn streak.

Buster came to fame when he killed a goose in a London park and The Man had to go to court!

He is horrified when Norman Tebbit arrives in the park with two extremely well-behaved dogs. Buster, at times chaotic and badly behaved, hopes that he will never have to act in that way!

A short read for a rainy afternoon.

I have lent my copy out and I am sure it is doing the rounds!

Charlotte’s Web E B White This is one of those books which can be enjoyed by both adults and children alike. The author was American and was born as long ago as 1899. Yet this book is timeless, despite being written way back in 1952. I remember reading it to two tiny girls in the 1980’s.

Over the decades this little children’s novel has regularly been voted the top children’s book. The Penguin paperback has delightful illustrations.

This is a true fable set on a farm where all the animals have personalities, hopes and dreams - even a spider.

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Fern, the little girl, is allowed to keep a tiny piglet from a litter. His name is Wilbur. A spider named Charlotte makes friends with Wilbur and it is she who eventually saves Wilbur from the usual fate of pigs, using her considerable web-making skills to write messages in her webs.

E B White has made the spider the heroine of this story and yet spiders are usually looked upon with fear and loathing.

Charlotte shows love for all living creatures and makes us realize that even the spider has an important place in the great scheme of things and should be respected.

This gentle tale of love and friendship has never lost its charm and I am sure it will still be read in another fifty years’ time.

The Gruffalo Touch and Feel Book Julia Donaldson The Gruffalo is a favourite amongst many children and this is a colourful, large hardback book with very little wording.

However, the pages contain textured panels for children to reach out and touch - making it suitable even for babies.

The pictures are large and children can feel the rough texture of his knees and the warm, furry side of his body.

There is not really a story as such, but the book gives a vivid description of a Gruffalo, the wonderful animal created by Julia Donaldson.

The original Gruffalo book was written for children from the age of three, so this is an offshoot which introduces little ones to this magical world at an even earlier age.

Phyllis Maiden Editor Many thanks again Phyllis for your continuing book reviews

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British Legion Poppy Appeal 2013 Our ideal situation would be to have every area of the village covered, with two or three reserves for emergencies.

We may never reach this Utopian state, but one can hope.

Amidst a host of charities all crying out for public money, we continue to perform well year after year.

This says a great deal for the esteem in which the Poppy Appeal is held by the people of Nettleham.

In 2013 we raised the sum of £2,556.16 just a few pounds short of the 2012 total.

This was a particularly good effort in view of the problems encountered prior to the campaign.

Several house-to-house collectors were not available to us, which meant that a number of areas in the village were not covered - areas which are usually very productive.

We really do need more people, please, to do this work. We are one of the very few areas to conduct house-to-house collections and we should be very proud of what we achieve each year.

However, house-to-house collections did produce the sum of £1,528.12, which was slightly less than last year. The business community, plus our two schools, the Health Centre, Church View and the library raised £876.53. In addition, there was a church collection of £141.51 and a donation of £10.00.

Our organizing group again did their sterling work. Getting trays of poppies and collecting tins to and from business premises all takes time and effort at the beginning and end of the collecting period. The tools to do that job have also to be provided for all the house-to-house collectors. Then there is the small matter of counting all the money!

Our house-to-house collectors again gave us wonderful service and never fail to produce consistent amounts of money.

Our business friends continue to be faithful to us by providing space on the counters and in the offices for trays of poppies and collecting tins. There is usually at least one other collecting tin on the counter, but they never refuse the Poppy Appeal.

The difficulty we have with house-to-house collections is two-fold. First, we never have enough collectors and second, should some of our collectors not be available, we are not able to replace them.

I should mention that for the past two years we have had some very welcome additional help for this task for which we are extremely grateful.

It just remains for me to thank everyone for all their help in 2013 and for making the year so successful.

Anyone who feels they would like to help us in any way with the Poppy Appeal, please contact me on 751370, when I would be pleased to discuss the matter with them.

Lindum Squash Club Lindum Squash Club is part of the Lindum Sports Association, an extensive sports facility in the uphill area of Lincoln, which also includes, cricket, hockey and a gymnasium.

The squash club is a friendly ‘members’ club with 3 courts, including a glass-back court with tiered seating. Squash courts are available seven days a week.

The Lindum holds a monthly in-house league for players of all abilities, and we also enter seven teams into the Lincoln Leagues.

We hold a club night every Thursday for all members and friends of all abilities to play social squash.

Squash coaching is available to all members, and we have an active Junior Section with group coaching every Saturday morning, held by our qualified coaches.

Fran and Carolyn are fully qualified and world-ranked in their age groups. Fran is currently over 50’s English Champion.

The club has an excellent social calendar, holding regular squash competitions, plus other sporting events such as cricket, bowls, dances, quiz’s and summer BBQ’s We offer Corporate Squash to local business, Saturday, Sunday and off-peak, which can include refreshments, from £50 inclusive.

Ken Weatherston

Dog Owners These are widely seen around Nettleham for a good reason please respect them and the village Hockey has recently returned to the Lindum and we now have a ‘state-of-the-art’ artificial hockey pitch, with support from Sport England: England Hockey.

A gymnasium with cardiac machines is available to members seven days a week.

The Lindum Sports Club has an excellent club house to hire for outside functions, birthdays, parties, corporate events, etc.

Squash membership: £70.00 annum Junior: £20.00 Family: £110.00 If you’re interested in joining individually, or as a family, please telephone Rob on 07812 586777 or email: LindumSquashMembership@post.com 59

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Beckside Preschool What we are all about Our preschool is a happy, safe place where all children are provided with opportunities to develop their own strengths and interests. We work in partnership with parents to enable our children to learn, achieve and succeed through play and real life experiences and we strive to continue to provide quality, affordable care.

What parents like best about our preschool “I like the communication and happiness of the children”; “Staff are professional and friendly, she talks about everything she does with a smile”; “Very informative and staff always tell me what he’s been up to”; “My child looks forward to each session”; “All staff greet you with a smile and enthusiasm!”; “Staff make a genuine connection with the children”; “My child was made to feel safe and welcome”.

Filling, emptying, scooping, moulding, squashing and smoothing in our new sandpit!

What the children like best about our preschool “I like playing with my friends”; “Playing with the fire engines, helicopters and small play people”; “Getting stickers!”; “Playing outside”; “Making friends”: “Painting and reading funny stories”; “I like it all!”.

What’s been happening at Beckside?

We have made further improvements to our garden and the children have been having fun in our new sand pit/digging area along with our eagerly awaited “Mud Kitchen”. Not only is a kitchen a lovely familiar link to child’s own ‘home setting’, this sort of familiar, secure play offers lots of opportunities for co-operative play and interaction, as well as a million other things! A mud kitchen will have some structure and is a defined space that is well resourced so that the children can return again and again.

We have also enhanced our outdoor storage area with resources in clearly labelled drawers with matching photographs to support the children in accessing our outdoor provision independently. Take a look at the pictures of the children using our mud kitchen along with other activities we enjoy at Beckside.

Find out more We operate from the Early Years unit at the Infant School in the village of Nettleham and now take children from the age of 2 to starting school. We are an inclusive pre-school and welcome all families in the community and surrounding areas. We are open Monday - Friday (term-time only) and offer full-day and half-day sessions.

Our opening times are 9.00am - 3.00pm.

Fine motor and hand/eye development using real tools

You can contact us on 07940 873505 to arrange a pre-visit and we would be very happy to show you around. Our website is currently under development, but you can email us for more information at:

We have places available for September 2014, so do please pop by and pick up a registration and enrolment form, or give us a call and we will post them to you.

We look forward to meeting you soon.

becksidenettleham@googlemail.com

Helen Kendall and Jayne Ellis

Quiet corners to enjoy imaginative stories

Our mud kitchen provides scope for learning

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Wife Sales The following article, kindly sent in by Rod Jessop, is reproduced from the Journal of the Lincolnshire Family History Society, Volume 24, Number 4, November 2013

This article was inspired by a newspaper report on the sale of a Nettleham wife in 1851.

One of the customs of plebeian society was the so-called “wife sale”. There is good reason to suppose that such sales were widely practised. However, only when they became newsworthy, when there were changes in social awareness and moral values of the middle and upper classes, did they cause public indignation. One such incidence is reported below.

NETTLEHAM Disgusting exhibition - It is occasionally our unpleasant task to detail circumstances of a brutal nature in reference to the treatment of women by those who are by law sworn to protect them. An exhibition of this nature took place on Friday evening last, at the neighbouring village of Nettleham, where an industrious and prudent woman, the mother of two children, was dragged from her bed by her brutal husband, and taken to a public house in the village to be exposed for sale, with her neck in a halter. The name of the fellow who thus outraged every feeling of decency is Samuel SAWYER, a laborer (sic) in the employ of Mr. BAYLES; he has only been married to his wife about nine months, she being a widow prior to her present marriage, and having the reputation of being a respectable honest woman. Her husband went to the shop of Mr. LIMON, the saddler, whom he knocked up for the purpose of procuring a halter, and having effected his object, he went to his wife, who had gone to bed, and having by threats induced her to get up, he took her to the White Hart beer-shop, where a person named PROCTOR, a farmer, acted the respectable part of auctioneer. The first bid was half a gallon of ale, at which price the woman for some time stood; a young blacksmith named JUBB, then bid 5s., and Joseph PEARSON, a miller who appeared anxious to “go partner” with Jubb, bid another 5s. The clerk of the parish (Richard JOHNSON), who it is said has outlived three wives, then spiritedly put down a sovereign, and begged Proctor to “knock her off,” at that price, which, however, he did not do, as the husband valued his wife at 30s., which was named as the lowest price at which a sale could be effected. Sawyer then advanced 2s., but the company could not be induced to bid higher, and “The Lot” was removed unsold. The publication of these particulars will, we trust, have the effect of making

the auctioneer and bidders heartily ashamed of the part they took in the disgraceful transaction - the husband we fear is past all hope of amendment.1 But how typical is this case? The wife sale practice varied somewhat from region to region. However, there was normally a clear conventionalised ritual involved.

The woman was usually brought by her husband to a public place. This initially was the market place, but by the 1830’s/40’s the sale was often conducted in a public house. The wife might be led by a halter around her neck or waist, usually made of rope, but silk, ribbons and other materials were also used. This was central to the ritual. The symbolism was obviously derived from the beast market, and sometimes involved paying a toll to the market officials. Then the wife would be publicly exposed for sale.

The sale was conducted in the manner of an auction, an auctioneer being duly appointed, frequently the husband himself.

He might note some of his wife’s qualities, and then call for bids. Within a short space of time the woman would be sold to a man in the crowd who had offered to purchase her. The sale price was usually low, perhaps a shilling or half crown, though sometimes the amount was larger.2 In some sales a small amount of money was given back to the purchaser, for luck.3 After the sale the husband would often ceremoniously transfer the rope, that had held his former partner, into the hands of the buyer, and all three would sometimes retire to a public house (if not already there) to seal the bargain with a drink.

Sometimes, some sort of written “contract” was drawn up.4 This custom has sometimes been regarded as brutish unfeeling social behaviour.

Certainly, when reported in the papers, comments were unfavourable: “The system of trading in human flesh seems not confined to the shores of Africa.”

“A scandalous action, detrimental to the morals of society.”6 “Disgraceful scene ... violates the laws of God and man.”7 “A disgraceful ebullition of public depravity.”8 However, when such wife sales took place, usually the marriage had already broken 61

down. Indeed, the husband and wife may already be living apart. Furthermore, by popular custom, wife sales were usually conducted with the consent of the wife.

Moreover, the purchaser of the wife was normally not only known to her, he was often already her lover. Most wife sales were a regulated ritual for legitimising divorce and remarriage in a time when legal divorce was prohibited for almost all men and women. Therefore, the wife sale offered a publicly performed marital rite of passage that carried the recognition of the community.

A report of one such happy couple: On Wednesday morning last it was announced by the cryer that the wife of Geo. WRAY, of Barrow... would be offered for sale by auction in the Barton (upon Humber) market place at 11 o’clock; punctually to the time the salesman made his appearance with the lady, the latter having a new halter tied round her waist.

Amidst the shouts of the lookers on, the lot was put up, and... knocked down to Wm. HARWOOD, waterman, for the sum of one shilling, three halfpence to be returned “for luck”. Harwood walked off arm in arm with his smiling bargain, with as much coolness as if he had purchased a new coat or hat.9 Further reading: Phillips, Lynda-Marie (2005) Wife-Selling in Lincolnshire during the Nineteenth Century. A Lincoln University dissertation, available in Lincoln Library.

Thompson, E. P. (1993) Customs in Common, Chapter 7 - The Sale of Wives.

Paul HICKMAN (A213) 1

Lincolnshire Times. October 28th 1851, p.3, col. 5.

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Louth & North Lincolnshire Advertiser, January 20th 1877. William Liggott, pork butcher, sold his wife for forty pounds to Chapman Pidd, landlord of the Fishmongers Arms.

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Lincoln, Rutland & Stamford Mercury, November 7th 1817. 6d returned for luck.

Lincoln, Rutland & Stamford Mercury, March 12th 1847. Three halfpence were returned “for luck.”

4

Lincoln, Rutland & Stamford Mercury, August 22nd 1856, p.2, col. 5.

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Lincoln, Rutland & Stamford Mercury, November 7th 1817.

6

Lincoln, Rutland & Stamford Mercury, February 12th 1819, p.4, col. 4.

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Lincoln, Rutland & Stamford Mercury, November 11th 1842, p.2, col. 3.

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Lincoln, Rutland & Stamford Mercury, December 9th 1842, p.4, col. 5.

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Lincoln, Rutland & Stamford Mercury, March 12th 1847.

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Harold Byrne The life story of one of Nettleham’s oldest residents, now aged 94, written by his daughter Catherine Wilding buried alive inside it. This could well have been the end of young Harold’s story, but no German bomb or pile of East Riding earth was going to keep him from his beloved Joan. Soldiers fought their way to him and, battered but alive, he was pulled choking from the rubble. He had a spell in hospital to recover, but he was soon back on his feet. It was definitely not time yet to bury Harold - he had much more work to do!

Harold the Boy As the 1920’s came roaring in with all the optimism of a decade just out of the Great War, in a small house in Liverpool Harold Valentine Byrne came screaming into the world. This Celtic champion born of Welsh and Irish blood, a fiery combination indeed, took his first steps in Everton Terrace. His early youth was spent in Bute Street, Everton Brow, Soho Street, Scotland Road and Queens Road. In St Rupert’s Castle this young future warrior laughed and played with his brothers, Matt and Paddy, his sisters Mary and Betty and his half-sister Nellie. On the docks of Liverpool this cheerful young boy frequently worked with Matt. Nellie was a lot older than the others and had a good job in a shop, which brought in vital cash for the family.

Harold went through his school years at the Friary School in Bute Street. From an early age he also went with his mother to the workhouse where she did washing brought in from the hospital. Later on he took on the job of black leading the grate at home. To earn extra money Matt and Harold collected the wood from crates on the docks to sell to people. Working together they chopped and bundled the pieces selling it for firewood. They had to be careful, the people of Liverpool would only buy wood from orange boxes and not smelly fish crates - they had to make everyone believe that they only used the best! The young entrepreneurs helped keep the harsh weather of the English west coast at bay for their customers, bringing warmth to the houses and much needed cash to their family.

The young bustling family moved many times.

It was not unusual for Harold to come home from either work or school to find strangers in his house and to be pointed to a new set of rooms, his mother and father having moved to cheaper rooms when they could, to save what little money they had. Moving house consisted of packing what little they had in a handcart and wheeling it to a new location, a far cry from moving house today. The Byrne family knew tears of both sorrow and joy as the young Harold grew up. His sister Mary was scalded to death by a large teapot which fell over her when she was very young in a tragic accident at home.

It was very sad for them all, especially Harold’s mother, but she still kept the family together.

The young Harold was a good pupil of the Friary, he became an altar boy when he was very young and spent a lot of time with an Italian family. His mother was very proud of him and set her heart on him entering the priesthood.

However, Harold had other ideas and in 1934, the year cat’s eyes were invented and Bonnie and Clyde were killed, Harold, aged fourteen years, left the Friary with his ‘Certificate of Conduct’ held tightly in his hand.

So having thwarted his mother’s ambitions for him, Harold the teenager entered the service of Bob Knoll, who was a glazier. For the next five years Harold learned this trade. He worked hard from the Farrall family’s cellar in Langdales

Street where Bob Knoll had his workshop and where it came to several people’s notice that he had quite a fancy for one of Mr Farrell’s beautiful daughters. The course of Harold’s life might well have been set at this point.

He worked for Bob and did some extra work, like most young men in Liverpool, on the docks.

He may well have stayed in Liverpool living a quiet life with this lovely northern lass, but world events far bigger than many of the young men in England could imagine would pull the nineteen year old Harold away from Liverpool and throw him to the far reaches of the world.

Private Byrne 1303022 was going to war.

Harold the Soldier Harold enlisted in the Liverpool Scottish Regiment and was posted to the Sobraon Barracks in Lincoln, where he joined the Lincolnshire Regiment and started his military training. As always in wartime, strong bonds of friendship form and Harold found a good drinking mate in Jock McLauglin. Jock was a fun-loving Scot and the two of them got into quite a few scrapes, one of which landed poor Jock on a charge. Jock was really upset - he was on ‘Jankers’, (military slang for being grounded and having really horrible jobs to do,) on a night when he had promised to meet a lovely young lady called Joan Sawyer outside the Drill Hall.

Harold decided to go and meet Joan in Jock’s place, he didn’t see why she should miss out on a date! The same charm that the Farrall’s young daughter had spotted in him as a teenager worked it’s magic on Joan and poor Jock never got another chance. The two fell in love.

Duty called to Private Harold and after his initial training in Lincoln, Harold, now at the tender young age of twenty years old, was given his first posting. He kissed the lovely Joan goodbye and set off by train to Hornsea to provide military cover whilst the coastal pillboxes were built in readiness for a German invasion of Britain. These coastal defence bunkers can still be seen to this day. During a German air raid on the east coast, as the civilian population dived for cover, Private Harold Byrne was helping to defend one of the emerging installations, when it was hit by a German bomb and Harold was

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Operation Dynamo swung into action and swept up the young Harold and many other fine young soldiers to save England’s forces in one of it’s darkest weeks. The Dunkirk Evacuation, as it would later become known, was in full force.

Private Harold Byrne was posted to Caister on Sea to provide military cover for the mass evacuation of British forces at this crucial point in World War II. As Churchill’s speech from Parliament resounded across the British Isles exhorting the nation to ‘fight them on the beaches’, Harold did what was expected of every young man of the time and played his part in what Churchill called the ‘miracle of deliverance’ with no thought for himself or his own safety.

To Harold and the men involved it felt like anything but a miracle. It was a disaster, Britain looked all but broken under the German war machine as, in dribs and drabs, the cream of the British military forces limped back across the English Channel leaving most of their equipment on the beaches of Dunkirk. But looks can be deceptive and thanks to the young warriors of the nation like Harold and the 850-strong flotilla, over 383,000 men were saved that week between the 26 May to 4 June 1940.

Harold returned to Lincoln where the city was hard at work producing parts for the Air Force to repel the never-ending waves of German Luftwaffe. He found and embraced the lovely Joan once again and trained hard to repel a German land invasion as the air war raged in the skies of southern England.

A tiny ray of light shone for Britain as the Stuka bombers were all but eliminated by the 15 August 1940, preventing the Luftwaffe from wiping out the precious 51 RADAR bases in the south of England. With our amazing early warning system intact, because Herman Goering could not see the point in continuing to bomb RADAR bases, together with the colossal bravery of the young men and women of this warrior nation, we held our ground and the Germans continually took more losses in the air than the British. The climax of the Battle of Britain on 15 September 1940 caused Hitler to announce on 17 September that the German invasion of Britain was cancelled. The Luftwaffe, on the last day of engagement, was out-gunned by 2 to 1!

Throughout the entire long months of the air battle from July to September the German losses reached over 1,000 planes, compared to 550 of the RAF. It was a bloody time as cities came under night attack from German bombers and lovers like Harold and Joan, along with millions all over Britain, wondered if we could survive.

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Towards the end of 1940 Harold volunteered for the DEMS service - Defence Equipped Merchant Ships, and went to London to begin his training.

The way this tiny island and its people were kept supplied under the Nazi onslaught is one of the great success stories of World War II and Harold played his part in it. Kissing Joan goodbye once again, tears in both their eyes, Harold joined HMS Chrysanthemum as a trainee gunner.

He was posted to HMS Davenport, the Naval training base in London and stayed at Limehouse. Joan continued to worry for her young lover as this was the time of the blitz and London was about the most dangerous place in England. However, as we have already seen Harold was not an easy young man to kill!

Harold the Globetrotter Harold joined a British merchant ship, the SS Trelissick, and went in convoy to Scotland.

Both Jock and Harold thought that this would give them more control over their lives and keep them safer. He left from Scotland to join the main Merchant convoy out of Reykjavik in Iceland. In reality convoys across the Altantic and through the Bering Straits near Norway were very dangerous places to be, as German U-boats tried to cut supply lines to Great Britain.

Harold and Jock saw a great deal of foreign and exciting places as they turned twenty-one years old. They joined several convoys in the North Atlanic, the English Channel and the Baltic and served on several ships going wherever they were needed. Good beer, good whisky and the ability of the young to remember only the good times means that Harold cannot remember all the ships he sailed on with Jock. They helped to provide military cover to convoys of food and goods coming to and fro in some of the most dangerous stretches of water at that time.

Norway was completely occupied by the Axis forces which meant U-boats could range freely in all the waters into which the two young men sailed. The English Channel too was prey to German aircraft and U-boats alike, indeed the SS Trelissick was sunk by enemy aircraft fire 3.5 miles from Sherringham Buoy in Norfolk on a voyage from London to the Tyne not long after Harold and Jock had left its company.

This may have looked a safer life to the two young lads, but in reality it was anything but!

As the two worked hard and played hard to keep Great Britain supplied in dark times, events the other side of the world were about to change young Harold’s life dramatically.

On the 4 September 1941 he sailed out of London once more and joined the P&O ship SS Soudan in Southampton. On the 7 December 1941 the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbour and, later that day, President Roosevelt delivered a speech to Congress and announced that the United States of America were at war with Japan. This made Germany respond and declare war on the United States, formally bringing the might of that great nation crashing into World War II on both the European and Pacific fronts.

Harold, who had been working alongside some American personnel on the various ships, now found himself needed far across the world.

He sailed to Scotland to join a massive convoy

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making for the Americas. With the help of the United States, convoys could now cross the Atlantic Ocean and sail through the Panama Canal to start to relieve war-torn Britain. Harold turned twenty-two years old aboard SS Soudan and although war and all its horrors were an ever-present threat, Harold saw more in that year than most people see in a lifetime. In this fine ship’s care, Harold’s ‘Grand Tour’ took him into Cristobal, where they stabilised their cargo, then on through the mighty feat of engineering that is to this day the Panama Canal. From there Harold and the SS Soudan sailed to the Hawaiian Islands and on to the Strait Settlements of Southeast Asia, firstly to Singapore to unload their cargo, then to Malacca, then to Penang with all its vibrant nightlife.

Next to India, with stops in Calcutta and Madras and from there to Colombo. Then back to Singapore to pick up VIP’s to take to Darwin in Australia and through the Great Barrier Reef onto Cairns. After that they went round the south of Australia to Perth, then across to Durban in South Africa. On arrival there she put into Port Elizabeth, but it was in Cape Town that the charming young Harold caught the eye of a lady and, being so taken with him, his very own Nell Gywn asked her father to give him a box of oranges before he left - which was quite a gift at the time! So, well-fed and with a broken hearted maiden in Cape Town, the ship put into Free Town before returning to England. Thus Harold came home again after six months travelling the world.

Harold went to Westcliffe-on-Sea where he once again joined convoys in the treacherous seas of the North Atlantic and the North Sea. However, with the war the way it was in 1942 and all the ships the young Harold had sailed on, it was not going to be long before his luck ran out.

Harold the Hero In August 1942, as Hitler’s forces fought mighty battles on the Eastern Front forging towards Stalingrad, Harold was enlisted in the Maritime Royal Artillery, (the new name for the DEMS), and embarked on the SS El Ciervo. On 3 August, as the ship neared Plymouth, she was hit low on the starboard side by a torpedo, tearing a gaping hole below the water-line and damaging the engine room. When the full force of the torpedo hit, Harold was blown clean off the gun platform sustaining injuries to his nose.

He shook his head, cleared his eyes, got straight back onto the platform and started returning fire as the SOS was signalled and the tugs set out from Davenport to recover the stricken vessel. Before the tugs could get to her she was torpedoed again. Harold stayed at his gun as the ship limped home, assisted by the brave little tugs - even though the order to abandon ship had been given.

Armed with a seven-day survivor’s leave pass, Harold set off back to Liverpool to see his mum.

Someone was definitely gunning for our hero at this point though. He arrived back in Liverpool during an air raid and searched in vain in his home area for his mum. He eventually found her, along with his sister Betty, taking refuge in an air-raid shelter. Our young hero did not stay long under cover however, he was recruited by

the ARP (Air Raid Patrol) and asked to help rescue people from a nearby bombed hospital.

It was some hours before he was reunited with his mum and sister to tell them all his news.

Seven days is not a long time and Harold returned to duty still with injuries. He joined the Royal Artillery and went to Woolwich Arsenal to train on Bofors Guns and 3.75” anti-aircraft guns which were used to protect British cities against the deadly V1 and V2 bombs, the dreaded ‘Doodlebugs.’ One day whilst he sat in the mess hall at his base in the south of England eating his dinner, he suddenly and frighteningly went completely blind. He was sent to Cirencester hospital immediately, where his still injured nose was operated on and reset. This fortunately restored his sight - the blindness had been caused by movement of his nose bones!

In March 1943 he received a letter from C T Bowring & Co Ltd informing him that he had been awarded an amount of £7.10s.0d for exemplary conduct on board the El Ciervo by The War risk Insurance underwriters.

So, by December 1943 the young hero had finally been treated for and recovered from the facial injuries he sustained in the previous summer aboard the SS El Ciervo and been given some beer money to celebrate the fact!

Harold was posted to the mobile Bofors guns which were moving up and down the coast. He could be seen in Dover, Deal, St Margaret’s Bay, Sandwich, Walton-on-the-Naze and Birchington.

In December 1944 he was stationed at Eastleigh with his unit waiting to go to France.

Enough was now enough for our twenty-four year old hero. As grand plans were made in Berlin for the Ardennes offensive which would lead to the Battle of the Bulge, even grander plans were afoot in the tiny village of Nettleham in Lincolnshire. Harold, tightly clutching a precious 72-hour pass, rushed into the warm embrace of his beloved Joan. They were married on 2 December 1944 in Nettleham Church. His recently repaired face was the most beautiful sight in the world that day to Joan Sawyer as she became Mrs Byrne. The young couple spent the rest of the precious pass in each other’s arms before duty once again pulled our hero Harold across the globe.

Harold the Farmer Three days is a long time in war. By the time the newly-married Harold went back to Eastleigh, his unit had been posted to France. Harold received orders to join the Queen’s Own Cameron Highlanders’ Regiment. He went by train to Dingwall in Scotland with his friend Eddie Storey. They trained in DingwalI and in Larne in Northern Ireland. After the training, they were posted on a troop carrier which left from Stranraer to Ireland, before heading to the other side of the world. During 1945, as plans for the Manhattan project were well advanced, Harold’s second grand tour took him first to Gibraltar and Malta before going on to Alexandria in Egypt and through the Suez Canal to Bombay. He joined Brinjap (British and Indian Troops) and was stationed in Ranchi, Bengal, Chittagong, Deolalie and Kallyanne. The Brinjap troops were formed to march into Japan, continued on page 64

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Harold Byrne Continued from page 63 so they trained hard and waited. The wait was soon over, and not only for the Brinjap - it was over for everyone. In November 1945 the armistice was signed and World War II was over!

Just two short weeks after ‘Enola Gay’ dropped her deadly cargo on Japanese soil, on the 20 November 1945, Harold’s demob papers came. Harold waited as did a lot of so-called ‘time-expired’ men in the camp at Deolalie. The phrase ‘going Doolally tap’ originates from the boredom these men had to deal with in the heat of India with nothing to do but wait to leave.

The war was over and Harold was coming home.

Harold was demobbed in York and was offered either a suit or a voucher. He took one look at the suits and knew Hepworths in Lincoln could do far better. He bought his new suit and set out with Joan to settle and build a life together.

They started out at 3 Council Houses in Nettleham (later changed to 26 Scothern Road), this was Joan’s grandmother’s house which later became theirs. In fact Joan’s grandmother had lived there since 1929 and it was from her that Harold developed his love of gardening.

They grew vegetables and flowers and kept pigs and chickens. Joan’s grandmother lived with them until she died in 1951.

This was a completely new way of life for the city boy from Liverpool, but like everything else in Harold’s life he took to it wonderfully and enjoyed it. He acquired his first-ever pair of wellington boots and his first-ever gardening fork. He put one through the other whilst concentrating on the garden! Joan laughed with him, but was more concerned about the money to replace the boots than she was about her young up-and-coming Percy Thrower!

He threw himself into Nettleham village life and became involved with the youth club and the British Legion, working alongside Tony Wilson, Bill Timms and Percy Bacon, who became his friends for many years.

In December 1946 he started work at Ruston & Hornsby as a tool-room fitter and cycled to work every day. On the 19 April 1947, Harold, now 27, became a father, when Joan had a baby girl, Beryl. Then, just two years later on 27 January 1949, his second daughter Catherine arrived.

Thankfully for all concerned he was only away a total of nine weeks and did not come to any harm this time.

Harold - the Later Years In 1959 Harold and Joan had another arrival to the family. The Byrne family’s first car. They bought a shiny Austin Ruby, registration number VL9624, and just one year later they bought a caravan on the east coast. Harold was still enjoying life in his garden although they grew more flowers now as food was not as scarce.

They also no longer kept pigs or chickens.

Harold took to fishing, a pastime at which he excelled and which he thoroughly enjoyed.

In 1965 as the USA sent troops into the Vietnam conflict, Harold became a grandfather. His first granddaughter Mandy was born and just one year later in 1966 his first daughter, Beryl, married John Fisher. Later that year his second granddaughter Diane was born. Harold and Joan were still enjoying the outdoor life with holidays in Scotland.

In 1969, as the Internet was being created and Neil Armstrong took that ‘One small step for Man’ on the 22 March of that year Harold’s second daughter, Catherine, married Michael Wilding. Harold and Joan took their first holiday abroad to Switzerland and later on 2 December 1969 Harold and Joan celebrated their Silver Wedding Anniversary at the Grand Hotel.

Harold and Joan, with both their children grown up, embarked on some globe trotting together.

Throughout the seventies they took in many sights all over the world, including Russia, Malta, Sardinia, Sicily, Yugoslavia, Bulgaria, Romania, Bavaria, Austria and Spain. They also became grandparents again with the births of Jane in 1970 and Clair in 1973.

As manufacturing declined all over England in the late seventies, Harold was made redundant from Dorman Diesels (formerly Ruston & Hornsby) in 1980. Harold was never one to let anything get him down. He worked for Barkers the builders for a short time, and tried his hand at window cleaning before he was snapped up by the forces again - he went to work at the Police HQ in Nettleham as a maintenance man.

Harold’s life was complete and they enjoyed life in rural Lincolnshire. They lived, loved and laughed together and, like many families of the day, took their holidays on the east coast of Lincolnshire at the brand new Butlins holiday camp in Skegness. Lots of good clean fun for Beryl and Catherine and lots of good beer and dancing for Joan and Harold. They also took holidays in Blackpool, Wales and the Isle of Man.

As the eighties arrived along with Yuppies, mobile phones and the Falklands War, Harold and Joan became great-grandparents with the birth of Sarah, their first great-granddaughter in 1982, then again with Kerry in 1985. Harold retired at 65 years old in 1985, but still couldn’t quite bring himself to slow down, continuing to work as a maintenance man for two days a week for Jackson’s Fabrics in Lincoln Market and at their shop in Lincoln High Street.

The family were happy and settled when, once again, world affairs would cast their shadow as far as Nettleham. Tension between Britain and Egypt had been increasing since 1948, leading to the Suez Crisis in 1956 and led to Harold being called up to the reserves. He once again readied himself and left his beloved family.

Harold started to enjoy more free time due to his retirement in the mid 80’s and he and Joan started taking holidays touring the continent with their daughter Catherine and Mick in their caravan. The foursome did a wonderful European tour visiting, France, Austria, The Pyrenees, Switzerland and Germany.

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Harold into the 21st Century The nineties saw Nelson Mandela freed and the launch of the Hubble Space telescope. 1990 saw Harold at the age of seventy flying from Sheffield to Chesterfield in a hot-air balloon no quiet tea and cakes for Harold!

In 1991, James, Harold’s first great-grandson was born, followed by Hannah, his third great-granddaughter in 1992. His love affair with Joan was still the driving force of his life and the wonderful couple celebrated their Golden Wedding Anniversary in 1994 in the Washingborough Community Centre with all their family and friends. They also took a cruise around the Norwegian Fjords, and it was certainly in much more luxury and style than his previous Norwegian voyages and this time he had his beloved Joan with whom to share it, not British and American soldiers!

In 1995 Amie, his fourth great-granddaughter was born and in 1996 with Siani, his fifth great-granddaughter was born and Harold finally retired from Jackson’s Fabrics and started to go to the city ground with Mick to watch Lincoln City Football Club.

As the century marched towards the new Millennium his sixth great-granddaughter Carla was born, closely followed in 1999 by his second great-grandson Jay. As the fireworks and cheers heralded the new century, Harold and Joan continued to enjoy their growing family, with Reece their third great-grandson, born in 2001. Harold and Joan also took what was to be their last holiday in 2001 visiting Cornwall and visiting the Eden Project. By the end of 2001 Harold was devoting much of his time to caring for his beloved Joan, now sadly suffering from dementia.

Harold and Joan celebrated their Diamond Wedding Anniversary with a huge party at the Lincoln City Supporters’ Club. This was quite a sight as all the growing families joined friends to honour this amazing love affair.

In early 2005 Joan went into Bernadette House Care home as Harold could no longer care for her at home. He never missed a day by her side, travelling from Nettleham to Lincoln every day.

He enjoyed taking her for walks in the wheel chair and playing games with her. They enjoyed each other’s companionship playing bingo, dominoes, board games and skittles, until Joan could no longer take part.

2006 saw another young member of the family arrive. Tyler, Harold’s fourth great-grandson, was born.

Another first for Harold happened in 2008 with the birth of his first great-great-granddaughter Abigail.

Harold continued to care for Joan until, with great sorrow, their life together came to an end on 20 March 2008 when Joan sadly died. Harold bore this loss with his customary mixture of courage and love. Their love and long life

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Harold Byrne Continued from page 64

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Eye Tests for Motorists A Lincoln optician is participating in a national campaign to highlight the dangers and risks associated with driving whilst having poor eyesight.

The campaign: ‘Think About Your Eyes’, encourages drivers to monitor their vision by getting their eyes tested every two years, to make sure their vision meets legal driving standards.

together continue to be a shining inspiration to all their family.

Harold, as he approaches his ninetieth year is still enjoying everything he can. In 2009 he walked all day around the Lincolnshire show, there was obviously more to see than the tomatoes and cucumbers in his greenhouse at home!

Harold continues to cut his lawn and, weather permitting, cycles the one mile round trip to the village to collect his newspaper and say hello to his beloved Joan and tell her all his news.

Harold still does his own shopping, most of his cleaning, washing, ironing and meals, which means he has a lot to teach most teenagers.

Harold at Ninety+ Now in his nineties, Harold is still doing the things he loves. He still looks after his beautiful garden, now more lawn than vegetables. He still cycles the one mile round trip to the paper shop, he still takes himself for a pint. He still misses Joan and visits her grave for a chat with her every day.

Clear View Opticians (advertisement page 16) has joined independent opticians all over the country to participate in the ‘Think About Your Eyes’ campaign, which highlights the importance of the sometimes difficult driving conditions in the darker winter months of the year, including blinding glare from oncoming traffic.

Many drivers perhaps know they really need spectacles or contact lenses for driving, but may not always wear them, or may perhaps be using an out-of-date prescription. Annabelle says “If you haven’t had an eye examination in the last 2 years, don’t take it for granted that your eyesight is adequate. If you drive with vision that doesn’t meet legal standards you could be putting yourself, your passengers, other road users and pedestrians in danger.”

A recent survey of 1,000 drivers found 26% have not had an eye test in the last two years and 3% - the equivalent to more than one million UK drivers have never even had one at all!

Harold loves life and it shows. It shows in the faces of all those he loves and who love him in return. It shows in his bright and cheeky smile as he thinks about the up and coming birth of his second great-great-grandchild.

This is a tribute to a brave and daring young soldier, a loving husband, father, grandfather, great-grandfather and great-great-grandfather.

A huge thank you to Harold Byrne for all he has done for everyone around him over his long and wonderful life.

Editor The text for this article, kindly supplied by Harold’s daughter Catherine, is taken from a book specially produced by the family to celebrate the ninetieth birthday of Harold in 2010.

Since then three more great-great-granchildren have been added to the family: Alfie (born June 2011) James (born August 2011) Lacy-Jane (born February 2013)

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Prestigious New Business Award Annabelle Magee Bsc(Hons) McOptom of Clear View Opticians with the ‘Start-up Business of the Year’ award at the ‘Angels Bring Business’ Awards in December 2013.

Congratulations from Nettleham News to Annabelle on winning the award.

Annabelle says “Eye examinations can provide a vital early warning of problems, that, undetected, can have potentially serious consequences. For example diabetes, high blood pressure and high cholesterol that could ultimately lead to cardiovascular disease.”

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Linelands A symbol for society’s state of uncertainty, or a beacon for change?

After reading the Editor’s article, ‘Shame’, in the winter 2013 edition of Nettleham News about the sad decline of Linelands residential home, I found myself resonating with a lot of the points made.

looking for a way in which Linelands - in its desolate state - can develop its potential as a place of reflection and discussion; activating it as a site for an art work that will allow for community engagement.

I derive from a family who have had a connection to the village for over 60 years and more recently, when coming back home during my uni holidays, I have been witness to the gradual deterioration of the buildings that comprise Linelands.

Since coming home last summer after finishing my degree, I have started going through the wonderful array of 35mm slides that we have at home, some from scenes in the village. This led me to wonder if there was a way in which these slides could be shared with other villagers, remembering the lives of those before us and the nature of community spirit.

This has caused me to contemplate not only the fact that the village is densely populated by those of an older generation, who have made their lives here and do not wish to be ‘shipped elsewhere’, but also the fact that this abandonment of buildings within the middle of an attractive village reflects a sad aspect of the current, throw-away attitude prevalent in society.

As Nigel wrote in his article “Once a place where people compassionately cared for others, they are a stark reflection of the dire state of our country.”

Being a Fine Artist who is interested in the potential for critical debate, often sourced from certain spaces, I have found myself

I’m not sure as to the logistics of it yet, but I have the idea (perhaps in summer) of holding an evening art exhibition by which all members of the local community would be invited to come to the Linelands site and watch the slides of years gone by being projected onto the building itself.

From this I would hope the encouragement of one’s contemplation of space (in this case locally) - how it is and was used, how precious it is and how it could be used in the future, would develop. There could also be the potential for local people to

share their stories of their time in the village and their hopes for its future.

I would be really interested in sourcing slides or film footage from other villagers to be used in the screening and wondered if this is something that I can ask you, as a reader, to help with?

I am hopeful that this sort of project could evolve discussion around events in our local community, and in society generally, that affect everyday people and yet are left to be articulated by those same people who allow buildings similar to Linelands to reach a state of disrepair.

As I say, at the moment it is just an idea I had a while ago, but it was re-ignited after reading the Editor’s article.

If you would like to be involved with the project, and/or, perhaps have any film, slides or photographs that you would be willing to lend, please don’t hesitate to email me: theodoraflorence90@gmail.com

An original 35mm slide is projected for viewing - perhaps you recognize the location?

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Thank you Alice White North Street

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Full Team A chance for you to play the beautiful game The quality of being new and different in an individualistic and appealing way - originality is something we all crave.

Being a person who has been blessed with little or no artistic talent, I admire anyone who has the ability to express themselves in an independent manner and then put their dream into reality.

To be a great innovator you need passion as well as a vision to see something in the world that at times saunters past the blind eyes of the masses. Edison, Da Vinci and the Wright brothers are just a few names who have made the world a better place through their visualisation and written their names into the never-ending pages of innovation history.

‘Organised football’, or football as we know it, dates back to 1863 and has and always will be one of my biggest loves.

The ecstasy of a last-minute winner, the heartbreak of missing out on penalties and the injustice of a poor refereeing decision no sport sends you through such a wide variety of emotions as ‘the beautiful game’.

The notion of influencing people to partake in football (and physical activity) is nothing groundbreaking and neither is the concept of online social networking with sites such as Facebook and Twitter now worth billions and billions of pounds.

However a combination of the two may well be cutting edge and is relevant to the modern world as we continue to pursue technological perfection.

This is dedicated to my friend Joshua Chapman (a fellow Nettlehamite) and his business partner Luke Heald who have come up will a clever concept that combines the two. Known as ‘FullTeam’ it aims to overcome the predicament that many football managers and captains face on a weekly basis when they find out at the last moment that a certain player or players are unable to make the game and

as a consequence are unavailable for selection. This therefore leads to a frenetic rush as the under-pressure individual posts a status on every social networking site begging for a player, whilst frantically calling anybody in their list of contacts who may have kicked an inflated pig bladder at some point in their lifetime, thus giving them a ‘Full Team’.

I know many readers will be thinking it sounds like I’m ‘crying over spilt milk’, but such shortcomings can result in unplayed matches, uncompetitive games, hefty fines and a loss in commitment and passion.

This can ultimately result in teams and players dropping out of competitive football and, before you know it, that dream of winning your first piece of silverware has vanished.

Here is where the magic of FullTeam comes in. Combining all the essential qualities of social networking and a database facility of players, the site will provide up-to-date player profiles, feedback and availability of individuals within the local area.

Individuals will be able to interact safely with other players to banter about classic encounters, what tactics to implement against specific sides and who is better: Cristiano Ronaldo or Lionel Messi?

From the outside the simplest way to look at it is as a ‘Facebook’ for both footballers and fans alike, but the reality is that it can help increase participation levels in the beautiful game and, who knows, maybe help unearth the next wonderkid of English football! Remember when you used to collect Merlin Premier League stickers and you needed just a few players to complete the album? Well imagine going online and finding these players available to select with their ability and skills evaluated by other footballers for you to view and compare.

‘FullTeam’ provides managers and captains with the opportunity to fill a vacant

www.fullteamfootball.co.uk position in their side through selection, rather than having to get any young or old soul into their starting line up purely because of a lack of choice.

More importantly this strategy will give hungry individuals who love the game the chance to take part in competitive football on a regular basis and help improve the quality of football within their specific area. Having already secured a partnership with Leisure Leagues - the UK’s largest provider of five/six-a-side football leagues, this unique concept has the potential to expand to a wider audience with the 11-a-side sector and other team sports already being mentioned.

Chapman and Heald are certainly hoping their idea will take off in the near future.

Both ooze unmatched enthusiasm for the sport and in particular Joshua is certainly able to relate to what is a common problem in any team game. The 26-yearold has run a successful six-a-side team in Lincolnshire for five years now, with the pinnacle being a memorable run at the National Tournament this year where his side ‘Poetry In Motion’ reached the last 16 of the competition.

So is ‘FullTeam’ the next big thing since Reggae Reggae Sauce? Well it may not be able to put music in your food, but it will help you field a complete side every week.

In the words of Messrs Chapman and Heald: “The game must go on.”

For regular updates on the project, please follow ‘FullTeam’ on twitter at: @FullTeam or ‘like’ their Facebook page.

For anybody interested in my writing, I now have a blog page set up at: http://brettowler10.wordpress.com/ where I write about a variety of different topics and subjects that have had or continue to have an influence in my life.

Brett Towler

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Stepping Stones Pre-school We are already half way through the Spring Term and we have been as busy as ever.

The ‘Acorn Room’ welcomes a new, highly qualified member of staff in Alison Thornton who comes with lots of experience in working in the Early Years sector. As already mentioned, she will be working in our ‘Acorn Room’, with our youngest children.

This term have been busy exploring the weather and have lots of muddy puddles in our garden to splash in - the children are always drawn to biggest, muddiest puddle! The children also celebrated the Chinese New Year, making lucky money envelopes, Chinese dragon masks, tasting some Chinese food and dancing the dragon dance to the beat of our drums.

Baking is always a favourite activity with the children and bread making is a popular choice, especially when we make enough for all the children to enjoy at snack time.

At the end of 2013 some students from William Farr Secondary School completed their work experience with us and whilst they were here planted some bulbs with the children. By the time you are reading this we should have some beautiful daffodils bringing some spring colour to our garden.

Once the threat of frost has gone, the children will be planting our vegetable plot with carrots, potatoes, onions, etc, and clearing out the flower borders of weeds and planting some beautiful flowers to attract the insects this summer. Hopefully this year the fruit garden will be more successful than last year - maybe our plum tree will actually produce some plums that we can enjoy at snack time!

Stepping Stones Pre-school is an inclusive setting and we take children from 2 years to school age from Nettleham and the surrounding area. We are registered to offer funded places for eligible 2 year olds and 3 and 4 years olds, offering up to 15 hours per week for each child. We are open Monday to Friday from 8.30am to 3.30pm. Stepping Stones also offer a Breakfast Club from 7.30am and an After School Club collecting children from Nettleham Infants and Junior schools.

The Holiday Club also operates during school holidays, should you need it.

Allison Faulkner

Stepping Stones Pre-school Telephone: 07599 546426 Email: steppingstones1@live.com 68

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The zoo at Newcastle Upon Tyne acquired a very rare species of gorilla, but within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle.

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It’s a Deal!

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F I L L E R

The lucky winner with the first correct answer drawn from the large number of entries was

Mrs Marilyn Tompkins

Upon examination, the veterinarian finally determined the problem. The gorilla was in season and to make matters worse, since this was such a rare species, there was no suitable male gorilla available.

Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Geordie Elliott, a local lad and part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages. Geordie, like many Newcastle men, felt he had ample ability to satisfy any female. The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution so Geordie was approached with a proposition: Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for £500?

Geordie showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under four conditions: “Forst”, Geordie said, “Nee kissin’ on the lips.” The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

“Secund”, he said, “Ye cannit nivva tell neebody aboot this.” The Keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

“Thord”, Geordie said, “Ah want all the bairns raised as Nuwcastle fans.” Once again it was agreed.

“And last of all”, he said, “You gotta givvus another week to come up with the £500.”

who wins £10.00

Funny Money!

Thank You

Here is a just-for-fun quiz relating to those far-off pre-decimal days, kindly sent in by a reader.

See if you can work out the items in the sum (there’s a few ‘slang/catch’ answers!)

from everyone at Nettleham Bowls Club Lots of individuals and businesses have helped us over the last twelve months.

Main Sponsor ●

Mundys Estate Agents

http://mundys-uk.com/Buying/New-Homes Grant Donors ●

West Lindsey District Council

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Nettleham Parish Council

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Lincolnshire Co-operative Raffle Prizes

They have given us their support so, in return, please, give them your support.

Also a big thank you to all those extra special people who have supported our newspaper collection project, week in and week out, over the last several years.

Your willingness to bag old newspapers and put them out every week for our collectors means that our club has not only survived, but has become stronger as a result of your efforts.

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Flowers by Design

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Franky’s Fish Bar

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Oriental City

We are now planning and hoping to improve our out-dated facilities in the near future and thereby to encourage even more people, both young and old, to come and give the game a try.

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Premier Convenience Store

Follow our progress at:

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The White Hart

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Solution on page 71 £ An imperial stone An historic bicycle A male singer Part of a monkey’s leg A man’s shortened name A child’s pet The moon, sun and Pluto A leather worker Regal headwear One leg of a pair of pants Hit repeatedly An ill marine cephalopod

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FUND RAISING FOR SIGHT SAVERS INTERNATIONAL A very Happy New Year to you all.

Oh what an exciting time it has been when fundraising for Sight Savers recently!

Way back in November a lady called to apologise for not being able to support the stall for Sight Savers at Nettleham Cares.

She left me with a £20.00 donation to be sent to Sight Savers. That was so very kind and generous.

Then early in December The Times newspaper launched its Christmas Charity appeal and one of the charities to benefit was - yes - you’ve guessed it - Sight Savers International! This was fantastic news and was made more exciting when the fashion chain “River Island” promised to match all donations to Sight Savers. This was quite wonderful news.

Again I had a telephone call from a gentleman in the village also apologising for being unable to come to Nettleham Cares and support the stall. He too wished to make a donation and when I told him about the Christmas Appeal and all donations being matched by “River Island”, he sent a most generous donation of £100.00 directly to The Times. Such a fantastic help for Sight Savers.

Meanwhile Glynis had kindly agreed to sell our Santas, Christmas stockings, snowmen and puddings, all beautifully knitted by Doris Colman, her family and Wynne Rollin.

Glynis and her staff sold the grand total of £22.00 and many thanks to you all who once again bought our goodies.

Sales made by Wynne Rollin totalled £15.50. and by the time further generous donations had been received, I was able to send £70.00 to the The Times to be matched by “River Island”.

Of course I have written to Sight Savers telling them that our fundraising is on its way and will eventually be received via The Times, when the donations to its Christmas appeal are finally handed over.

Thank you so much for such generosity.

To continue our fundraising, there will be an EGGSTRA SPECIAL COFFEE MORNING to be held on Saturday 12 April in the Old School - small room, 10.00am - noon.

Usual stalls, delicious coffee, etc. Help of all kinds would be much appreciated.

Please feel free to leave cakes or gifts with me at 14 Sudbrooke Lane, or of course, bring them with you to the event. We look forward to seeing YOU. Joyce E Lewis

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St Barnabas Spring Events Wine & Wisdom 7 March 2014 Waddington Village Hall, Waddington 7.30pm Are you an Egg-Head or a walking encyclopaedia?

Put your knowledge to the test for a good cause! The annual St Barnabas Wine and Wisdom event is returning Friday 7 March.

Get your thinking caps on and join in the fun for a night of trivia: 8 rounds, plus a table-top quiz. Could you be the next St Barnabas Wine & Wisdom champion?

Teams from 5-8 people Entry: £6.00 per person Wine & crisps included Have you got the knowledge?

St Barnabas Strictly Finale Sunday 23 March 2014 The LPAC, University of Lincoln, Brayford Pool, Lincoln, Lincolnshire LN6 7TS £10.00 adult, £5.00 Child On the back of the hugely successful BBC1 show, St Barnabas Hospice is holding its very own Strictly Ballroom finale at the LPAC on Sunday, 23 March. Over the past 10 weeks contestants have been learning the Rumba, the dance of love, plus the very elegant Waltz.

Contestants will be competing against each other in front of a live audience and judges to see who will be crowned St Barnabas Lincolnshire Hospice Strictly Ballroom Champion 2014! The audience will be able to vote for their favourite couple.

Love dancing? You won’t be disappointed Tickets available from: www.stbarnabashospice.co.uk St Barnabas Easter Craft Fair Sunday 13 April Branston Hall Hotel, Lincoln LN4 1PD 10.00am - 4.00pm Easter Eggcellence!

This Easter come along to our annual Easter Craft Fair at Branston Hall hotel.

There will be an array of beautiful hand-made goodies made by crafters from around the county. For only 50p entry, whether browsing or buying, St Barnabas Hospice and Branston Hall invite you to enjoy a day out. So why not join us for a cup of tea, have a go on our chocolate tombola, enjoy a bite to eat or simply enjoy the beautiful surroundings.

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Returning for the children will be the Easter Egg Treasure Hunt within the beautiful grounds and Face Painting.

Families are most welcome.

Top to Toe Vintage with Swap Shop in partnership with Lincolnshire showground

24 April 2014 7.00pm - 10.00pm Lincolnshire Show Ground Following the success of last year’s event, we are proud to announce we have teamed up with the Showground once again to showcase our Top to Toe Vintage and Swap Shop.

It is an opportunity to style yourself all things vintage from Top to Toe - from the clothes you wear, to your hair and even the items in your home!

Plus tutorials from The Strand hairdressers, transforming you into a vintage goddess.

Keeping you entertained is wartime tribute singer Heather Marie, she is a talented, professional female singer bringing the music of the 1940’s and 50’s to life!

And last, but by no means least - the fabulous opportunity to be part of the latest craze to hit our cities - ‘Swishing’ the new Ebay!

Have you got items of clothing in your wardrobe which you never wear, but which are still in tip-top shape? Bring them along and swish to your heart’s content.

Swishing works on a score system - if you have more than one item, please drop off your clothes the week prior to the event at St Barnabas Fundraising Office. Please note this is not a jumble sale.

For further information on Swishing please visit www.stbarnabashospice.co.uk Tickets are only £8.00 (in advance) including a drink on arrival and free access to swishing If you are interested in having a stall at this fabulous event, or for further information, please visit www.stbarnabashospice.co.uk or contact Becky Otter at becky.otter@stbarnabashospice.co.uk Telephone: 01522 559516 St Barnabas Lincolnshire Hospice Fundraising (Lincolnshire) 12 Cardinal Close, Lincoln LN2 4SY T: (01522) 540300 M: 07779 311181 F: (01522) 568706 www.stbarnabashospice.co.uk

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FUNDRAISING FOR

LINK TO HOPE 356 SHOEBOXES OF JOY Thank you all so much for such a very generous response to the 2013 Shoebox Appeal.

I know I gave you all the total received as at the time of writing in the last edition of Nettleham News, but the final total of boxes we received was 356 shoeboxes for both families and elderly folk in Eastern Europe.

So many smiles and whoops of delight and even a few tears of joy, as folk received their boxes from us all.

So kind of you to care and share.

Do visit www.linktohope.co.uk to view the video and read the diaries of those who delivered the boxes.

Thank you too for all the blankets, hats, scarves, teddies, legwarmers, toys and knitted jumpers we were able to send. Many were packed into shoeboxes, but the larger items were handed to folk as the need was realised. I know many of you are already knitting and making gifts for this year’s appeal and thank you very much - your help is invaluable.

Many of you were able to sign the Gift Aid form, meaning that more precious pennies were sent to the charity and, of course this will benefit all other projects.

Once again we were able to hand to the driver a quantity of outdated and foreign currency - much appreciated thank you - and this too will help to fund further projects.

To continue our fundraising we have arranged a Coffee Morning at Church View by kind permission of the Scheme Manager on Friday 28 March from 10.00 - 12.00. I’m sure by this date I will have received the Thank You poster and the photographs of the delivery of the boxes for you all to see.

Of course there will be our usual delicious tea/coffee and biscuits, cake stall, raffle and tombola and this will give us a chance to discuss the way forward to help the appeal this year.

Feel free to bring any gifts with you but, of course if you are busy that morning, feel free to leave any donations of any kind with me at 14 Sudbrooke Lane.

Thank you again for your support and generosity.

Cora, Mary, Janet and Joyce

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Vicars of Nettleham

Could You Help?

Recently, a visitor to the church remarked that there was no list of vicars there and so I thought I should rectify this.

The Lincoln and Lindsey Blind Society are looking for Volunteer Befrienders Could you help to take a visually impaired person on a shopping trip, support them in a community-based activity, a walk in the park or visit a lonely person in a care home?

In 1423 the Rectory of Nettleham was annexed to the Chancellorship of Lincoln Cathedral. From then until 1859 successive Chancellors of the Cathedral sent priests to serve in Nettleham. To find their names would be a lengthy task.

We urgently need volunteers to provide this type of help in Lincoln and the surrounding villages in West Lindsey.

The Pluralities Act of 1838 brought to an end the system whereby priests could hold (and draw the income from) more than one living and on the death of Canon G T Pretyman in 1859, Nettleham was separated from the Chancellorship.

Meanwhile, in 1856 Revd A V Stuart became the first resident vicar since the 15th century and the nine-bedroomed Victorian vicarage was built for him and his successors. While it was being built he lived at 25 East Street, now known as The Old Vicarage. The ‘new’ vicarage was sold in 1982 (and was then renamed The Old Vicarage!) when the present vicarage was built on the west end of the vicarage garden.

Here is a list of clergy I have compiled.

If there are errors I would be pleased to know.

1856-1884 Alexander Voules Stuart 1884-1890 Charles Warren 1890-1904 Bernard Walter Hancock 1904-1907 Hubert Larken 1907-1909 Charles Henry Lenton 1909-1921 Charles King Watkins 1921-1927 Samuel Stamp 1927-1950 Harry Cotton Smith 1951-1981 Henry George Herrington 1982-1994 Antony (Tony) William James Burton 1995-2005 Gordon Frederick Sleight 2006-2013 Jennifer (Jenny) Jane Elizabeth Rowley The appointment of the next vicar is currently in process.

Richard Thornton 71

Full training, travel expenses and support will be given.

For more information please telephone 01507 608802 or Michaela Ardley on 07968 270150 We are a local charity serving visually impaired people since 1921

Husbands...

Q: What does it mean when your husband is in bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

A: You just didn’t hold the pillow down long enough!

One day my husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. He shouted to me from the laundry room, “What setting do I use on the washing machine?”

“It depends,” I replied. “What does it say on your shirt?”

He yelled back, “Manchester United!”

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your emails?

A: Simply rename the incoming email folder ‘Instruction Manuals’.

Funny Money Quiz Solution 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12

Fourteen pounds Penny farthing Tenor An ape knee!

Bob Guinea (pig) Three far things!

Tanner Crown Half a knicker!

Pound Sick squid!

TOTAL

£ 14

s 0

10

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5 10 1 0 6 0

d 0 11/4 0 1/2 0 0 3/4 6 0 0 0 0

£32 17s 81/2d

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The Poetry Page

This Poetry Page is dedicated to the memory of David Fenwick 1941 - 2014

RUSH OF SPRING Leaning over the garden gate, The rush of Spring sweeps over me, Amid soft flowers and budding trees.

Energies high above do flow.

Orpheus lost underground, woes, His lament at Spring’s birth, rose From his travels in darkness deep, Where spirits lost do sob and weep.

While in blazing glory, the seasons keep.

My senses lost I close my eyes.

New life anew from that which died.

The rush of Spring swept over me.

Amid soft flowers and budding trees.

T M Lewis

Beasties, Lizards and Me A Nonsense Poem While wildebeasts and dogs do roam, Just like the lizard I stay at home.

I write the words upon the wall, The name that is and not at all.

Spots of rain do drip like ink I watch the words interlink.

The lizard stirs and watches me He grins at my inadequacy.

Scraping his name like on the sand, He blows the wind to blow the land.

His name like mine upon the wall, It was and is there not at all.

What a Waggle slithers he.

Can’t you write your name for me?

My name, like yours, is truly set Upon the wall it was well kept.

What a Waggle slithers he, Disappearing in the sea.

Once more my name is on the wall, The name that is and not at all.

Beasties come and watch me write Dogs and lizards give me fright.

Waggle Waggle Slither roam, Names of beasties I can own.

But my name is on the wall.

The name that is and not at all.

T M Lewis

JEALOUSLY BEWARE, my love, of green-eyed sparks, That drown the songs of singing larks.

While teeth do gnash and spiteful tongues, Do outwit the song of songs.

Solomon plays his harp of love.

The green-eyed monster spits from above.

But I do love, Love I do.

I pledge my love is true, is true.

Forgive my heart, it’s in love with you.

T M Lewis

SPRING Now the rude rugged Winter retreats to the north, Where he revels in frost all the year; And nature rejoicing begins to bring forth The gay livery the spring loves to wear.

The meads change their russet for mantles of green, Trim’d with violet, orange and blue; The lawn shows a nosegay that’s fit for a queen; And is wash’d every morning in dew.

The groves, by rude winter left nak’d and forlorn, Modest spring clothes in verdure again; And adorns with white blossoms and sharp-pointed thorn, Whose fragrance perfumes the whole plain.

The larks make the welkin resound with their song; While the thrush fills with music the grove.

The blackbird sings sweetly the green boughs among; And the wood-pigeon coos to his love.

The flocks, fed all winter on roots, pulse and hay, Now rejoice through the pasture to range.

The lambs cheer the scene with their innocent play; And all nature exults in the change.

The farmer with joy sees the blade springing up, Where so lately he guided the share; And he prays for mild seasons to favour the crop, Which in autumn repays all his care.

Haste away from the city, dear friend, for a time Bid the circles of fashion adieu; And enjoy in the country the spring in its prime, Now its charm it expands to our view.

Henry Winn 1816 - 1914

A MODEL HOME FOR A WORKING MAN Beneath a gentle sunny slope, I’ll build my cottage home; Some forest trees shall cluster near, And form a shady dome.

I’ll have a garden round my house, Where many a dainty grows; And train about my trellis’d porch The jasmin and the rose.

A good-sized room for daily use, Convenient, warm and neat; With every kitchen requisite, And fixtures all complete.

With chairs and sofa made for wear, Not merely for display; Where friends may freely loll at ease, And children romp and play.

A parlour on whose paper’d walls I’ll hang, exposed to view, My Wilkie’s homely cottage scenes, And Turner’s landscapes too.

With portraits of the famous men Who made their lives sublime, And left their pure and lofty thoughts As heirlooms for all time.

I’ll have a book-case, full of books, More precious far than gold; Where I can have communion with The mighty minds of old.

A cabinet that’s richly stor’d With works of art and skill; And choicest flowers shall grow and bloom Upon my window-sill.

Henry Winn 1816 - 1914

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David regularly contributed poems for this page in Nettleham News magazine

A WELCOME TO SPRING Welcome! welcome! smiling spring, Blessings all around thee fling.

Welcome bright and azure sky, Glad’ning every heart and eye.

Welcome sunshine, welcome showers, Song of birds and scent of flowers.

Welcome! welcome! smiling spring, Cheering every living thing.

Welcome snowdrop, first to rise, Frown’d upon by angry skies; Hardy daisy; primrose bold; Crocus, with thy cup of gold; Cowslip yellow; harebell blue; Flowers of every form and hue.

Welcome! welcome! spring so fair, These are gems to deck thy hair.

Welcome! welcome! apple spray; Cherry bough; and pear tree gay; Blossoms bursting everywhere, Promise of a fruitful year.

Tender grass and springing corn; Sparkling with the dews of morn.

Hail thou fair and vernal spring, Buds and flowers thy welcome sing.

Welcome larks, that soaring high, Pour down music from the sky; Song of blackbird; lay of thrush; Every minstrel of the bush; Welcome cuckoo, come to say, “Spring is here, be gay, be gay.”

While we welcome thee, 0 spring, Every tongue inclines to sing.

Welcome gentle lambs again; Oxen lowing o’er the plain; Squirrel, happy, light, and gay; Merry children out at play; Welcome butterfly and bee; Idleness, and industry.

Welcome! welcome! smiling spring, Cheering every living thing.

Henry Winn 1816 - 1914

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