Alfredo

Columbia INCITE | Oral History_Terrell_Alfredo

Q:

OK, so today's date is March 6. This is Terrell Frazier and I'm interviewing Alfredo Guzman?

GUZMAN:

Mm-hm.

Q:

At Bradley Tech. Alfredo, do I have your permission to record this interview?

GUZMAN:

Yes, you do.

Q:

OK, let's get started. So thinking about something like a memory that just stands out for you. It can be whatever you want, but about the community or.

GUZMAN:

I don't know why I always lived in the hood.

Q:

Hm?

GUZMAN:

I always lived in the ghetto-- like the hood. And I got-- my memories are always getting shot at or something.

Q:

Where did you grow up?

GUZMAN:

Everywhere. We moved everywhere.

Q:

Oh, really.

GUZMAN:

I started off in Buffalo, New York. Well, I was born there.

Q:

Oh, OK.

GUZMAN:

Massachusetts, Tennessee, Florida, Milwaukee, obviously. Milwaukee's mostly the place that we usually go to because there's more jobs over here than anywhere we went to.

Q:

Is that your last move? Here?

GUZMAN:

Yeah, here.

Q:

Yeah, and where did you move from?

GUZMAN:

Florida.

Q:

What was that like?

GUZMAN:

Florida? We came over here because--

Q:

It's cold.

GUZMAN:

It was-- no. It is really cold over here. I don't like it. It is like, over there it was really cool. I didn't have family, like blood family, but I had family. Because they had my back if anything.

Because if I get in a fight, they get in a fight. And the reason we came over here is because of something bad.

Q:

Yeah. In terms of something you saw or just like--

GUZMAN:

No, something that we did.

Q:

OK, yeah.

GUZMAN:

Because we jumped-- So there were some people out there better than Frederique, so we had to teach them wrong. So we taught them wrong. We sent somebody to the hospital, and then cops were coming to arrest us, and we moved.

Q:

Was it your family or they kind of were going to extend it?

GUZMAN:

They were going to arrest me and my brothers, but then my mom didn't want that so we moved.

Q:

How many--

GUZMAN:

Siblings do I have?

Q:

Yeah.

GUZMAN:

I have Malik, Brenda, Elmer, Jose, Jesus, Moses, they are my two stepbrothers, and I have one other brother that's part of my dad's side.

Q:

Oh. Where are you in terms of age?

GUZMAN:

I'm 15.

Q:

In terms of with your siblings, are you older or, you're older?

GUZMAN:

No, I'm in the middle, between the middle.

Q:

What is that like?

GUZMAN:

Being ignored at all times because they pay attention to the little ones. And then if not, the big ones if they need their help. But when I try to ask for help I don't get it that much, so I had to learn myself. And my mom, she's just started listening to me, because I got arrested a couple of weeks ago. I want to do something to the person, but I can't because then I get arrested for seven years.

Q:

Yeah, what-- when you say listening to you, what do you mean?

GUZMAN:

She started listening to my problems. Because I always asked her if we could talk about my problem. And she said no, she just puts me in therapy and I don't like talking to therapists. So I never talked to my mom about my personal problems, just one therapist. And then that therapist, my mom took her out because she said something my mom didn't like.

Q:

She said something when you guys were talking and that?

GUZMAN:

Yeah.

Q:

Bet you were telling her that you wanted to talk to her about it.

GUZMAN:

Yeah, because when they came out my mom was like, she wanted to talk to me. She told me that she wants me to start opening up to her. Because she saw that everything sad that I had inside me, that I always wanted to talk, I kept it inside me. It had built up to anger and some darkness that I wanted to do. And I really wanted to do something.

Q:

Yeah, yeah. What did that look like when you got out and you started talking? How did you feel?

GUZMAN:

I was like, I felt empty like I had nobody there for me. And so I just started talking to my mom about that. And then I just started feeling like I'm taking things out of my chest that I needed to take off for a while already. Like my shoulders are getting loose.

Q:

Lighter.

GUZMAN:

Yeah, lighter.

Q:

Yeah, what's it like when you think about just whatever, one of the best memories you have?

GUZMAN:

With family or friends?

Q:

Either.

GUZMAN:

Playing ding dong ditch with the neighborhood. We all got together at my house over there in Florida. Everybody in my neighborhood, we were all friends. I only had beef with one person because he was talking about my mom. But we got up together. We all met up at my house.

My mom was sleeping. And then all you see is cars pulling up with music and my mom wakes up mad. And we-- she kicks everybody out of the house. So we left the house. And we're going neighborhood to neighborhood finding [INAUDIBLE] until the cops come and everybody just redded up. Yeah, my life will have always been getting cops called on us or something. I see the reasons now. We ignored them. We ran. Basically, we are on the run but we're not.

Q:

Yeah. Do you have friends in your neighborhood here?

GUZMAN:

No.

Q:

Did you make new friends?

GUZMAN:

I can't go out in these neighborhoods because Milwaukee is where I always get shot at.

Q:

Oh it Milwaukee, yeah.

GUZMAN:

Because I had beef with a lot of gang members.

Q:

OK, in the city?

GUZMAN:

Yeah. In North side mostly.

Q:

Thinking back on it, what were those experiences like in that time for you? Do you--

GUZMAN:

I was in shock. Well, the first time I got shot at, I was in shock. I didn't want to do anything. I just wanted to stay alone, be alone. I didn't talk to nobody. But then my mom put me in therapy. That's where I met the therapist that I liked and we talked and I told her. That's when I opened up to her. My trust is so small. I didn't have trust in a lot of people. So I learned that I need to start talking to people about my problem. I needed to start talking to somebody. So I have this one person. She's like my best friend. And I talk to her all the time about my problems.

Q:

In school? The school that you met here?

GUZMAN:

No. We met not here but we met in school.

Q:

OK, yeah, same age?

GUZMAN:

Yeah.

Q:

How did you become friends?

GUZMAN:

She was my ex-girlfriend's neighbor. And then she saw my ex-girlfriend's picture on my phone.

And she was like, is that her name? And then she said her name. And I was like yeah, how do you know her? She's like because we were neighbors. And I was like, aw. But then since that day her boyfriend-- her ex-boyfriend that doesn't like-- I mean, I don't know if it was cool or not. He goes to this school. But I had beef with him last year because me and her friends. And then he thought he was going to bully me so.

Q:

Because you two were close?

GUZMAN:

Yeah, yeah.

Q:

Yeah, what do you think makes you a good friend when you think about your friends that you're close to?

GUZMAN:

I'm always there when they need to talk to somebody or cry. And if they need somebody to come over and talk in person I'm there because my dad let's me use his car a lot. So I drive to people's houses. I stopped smoking. That's a good thing. At the same time, it's a bad think because I like it. Do you know how it feels?

Q:

But, yeah.

GUZMAN:

I like the feeling. But my PO told me I had to stop smoking, if not I get arrested. And I was like that's messed up.

Q:

When you-- what was it like the first time you got arrested? What did it make you think about?

GUZMAN:

I was like, I'm afraid of becoming my dad. My biological dad. Because I never met him but I heard a lot of things from him, that he was always getting arrested. He was always in and out of prisons since I was born. That's why my step dad was always there. So I call him my dad.

Q:

When you think community, what do you think about? School, home, whatever?

GUZMAN:

Community?

Q:

Yeah, like what your community is.

GUZMAN:

School because not home. Because at my house-- I live in a building environment. Everybody- I clean people's cars for money because I need to still pay off my tickets. So I clean people's cars to pay off my tickets.

Q:

Tickets on your dad's car?

GUZMAN:

Huh?

Q:

Tickets on your dad's car?

GUZMAN:

No. Tickets for court.

Q:

Oh your ticket. Oh, OK.

GUZMAN:

Because I have-- there is one at 300 dollars. The other one's $500.

Q:

What is that? What is the ticket--

GUZMAN:

For?

Q:

Yeah. Or I mean like, wait-- it's a citation?

GUZMAN:

I don't even remember. Yes. Yeah. And then for supposedly wasting the judge's time or whatever, and I was like that's bull. She wasted my time because I'm always free. But I'm always in and out so I'm like, I'm just going to become my dad. I always thought negative because always in my life there was always negative vibes, not positive. Because my mom always had negative vibes, my dad-- my step-dad had negative vibes. We were always moving around so it was all negative.

Q:

Negative around experiences like work or [INAUDIBLE] like things like that? Yeah. What kind of vibes did you--

GUZMAN:

Feel?

Q:

Yeah.

GUZMAN:

Like, my mom, she tried killing herself a couple times recently. And it's negative. They never have money to pay off bills. We're always getting kicked out of places because we never have money. That's why I told mom I could start working. But because I told her I could just keep $100 and you can keep the rest. Because I really don't need money. I'm still a child. I don't need money but I need money. So I told her that but my step dad, he's always hurt. He was supposed to have back surgery, but he doesn't have it-- he doesn't want to get it. Because they-- do you know SSI? They denied mine and his SSI. And then I had IP and they took my IP out.

Q:

They did? oh.

GUZMAN:

So I was supposed to get extra help but they took mine away. Because supposedly I was doing good in sixth grade. So I was like, what am I supposed to do, be bad?

Q:

Right, yeah. This is like when you're performing good-- what they're telling you to do-- then they took that benefit away, yeah. Does your mom let you help her?

GUZMAN:

Huh? In the house.

Q:

Yeah, or when you work does--

GUZMAN:

No, I work all under the table. You know what's under the table?

Q:

Yeah, would she left you give her some off--

GUZMAN:

No.

Q:

No.

GUZMAN:

I just put it in her room and act like she found the money. She doesn't like getting borrowed money or nothing. We still owe, I think it was one-thousand something for rent. And then my mom's stressed. I'm stressed out because I'm not trying to get kicked out the place. Because I like the place. I don't like the neighborhood but I like the place.

Q:

How long you been there?

GUZMAN:

It's about to be eight years. You know it's about to be two years in January-- no, January. June or July.

Q:

When you think of home where would you say that is?

GUZMAN:

Nowhere. Nowhere.

Q:

Why is that?

GUZMAN:

Because we're always moving around. And I never have a steady place, so I don't consider anywhere home.

Q:

Yeah, is it like you're now just expecting to move to the next place?

GUZMAN:

Yeah, I was expecting to move myself with my aunt. Because well, since I came to Milwaukee it's always negative. I'm always getting arrested or something with the law. So I was just thinking about moving to Tennessee because it's more chill down there. And I have friends down there, but not many friends.

My girlfriend lives down there now. But that's not the reason I'm moving down there. My mom thinks it's the reason. But it's really not. It's just because I like the schools over there because they give me help over there. Over there in Tennessee, I had As and Bs. We came to Milwaukee, everything was damaged. I had Us, Ds and all.

Q:

Was it just getting adjusted or just a different type of-- different classes or?

GUZMAN:

No, because their classes were harder but I had more help.

Q:

OK, I got you.

GUZMAN:

And over here they don't help me like that. And I always got to come to Dom or somebody to ask for help.

Q:

Yeah, how long were you in Tennessee? Because you moved from Florida here, right?

GUZMAN:

Yeah, in Tennessee we were there for six months.

Q:

OK, oh, so.

GUZMAN:

Not that long. But the friends I met they're from-- I met them online but then they came over here to visit me.

Q:

Here to Milwaukee?

GUZMAN:

Yeah. But they didn't like it because it was like my neighbor. They slept at my house and it's

the hood. All you hear is gunshots-- or not-- sirens or something. So but they didn't like it so they left for right back to Tennessee.

Q:

Yeah, were they coming to visit or thinking about staying?

GUZMAN:

No, they were just thinking about coming over just to stay for at least a month or something but they said they're never coming back.

Q:

Oh no, what was your neighborhood like in Tennessee?

GUZMAN:

It was [INAUDIBLE]. But we left Tennessee because they jumped my brother. Because supposedly he kicked this little girl. She had a bruise on her leg and then the mom came and she jumped my brother. That's when all my brothers came up the house. And there was a big pile and the SWAT team had to come because some people called saying it was a home invasion.

Q:

Oh, of the mothers house from the little girl?

GUZMAN:

Yeah. People called saying there was a home invasion. They had the swat team come over and everything. And I was like, whoa. I was looking. I was small so I didn't know what to do.

Q:

How old were you then?

GUZMAN:

I was 10. I'm 15. Yeah, like 5-- no. Yeah, like five years ago. I was like, whoa, this is cool. It was cool. My first time seeing the SWAT team and everybody. The helicopter--

Q:

And the gear.

GUZMAN:

Yeah, and the helicopters and everybody. I was like, whoa. They really take that serious over here. But I wonder how my brother felt? I always wondered how it felt to get jumped? I got jumped when I was smaller. But that was because I liked this one girl. I got bullied for liking girls when I was younger. And from those experiences, I learned to fight for myself. I asked my mom to put me in boxing but then we move. So I'm always in different boxing places. They always teach me the same techniques but I already know them.

Q:

Right, oh, so you starting over while you're here? Are you in a boxing club here?

GUZMAN:

No. I can't because I had surgery on my shoulder.

Q:

Oh, I see, OK.

GUZMAN:

I still got the scars.

Q:

Yeah, oh, wow.

GUZMAN:

They want to open this up because it didn't heal right.

Q:

Yeah, is that your cuff?

GUZMAN:

Huh. Yeah, rotator cuff.

Q:

Yeah, it dislocated? Yeah.

GUZMAN:

Fighting my brother.

Q:

Oh, no. What was-- over what? What, you got into an argument?

GUZMAN:

A girl. No, I broke up with my first love. We were together for eight months over here in Milwaukee. And she stopped talking to me, so I got mad. So I threw my Timberlands at him.

And he got up, and he started swinging and I started swinging. It was a bloody fight. So he flipped me over and pulled my arm. And the way he pulled it--

Q:

It popped.

GUZMAN:

So yeah, I didn't feel it until I tried getting up with my arm, and I couldn't feel it. And my sister tried helping me up. But I started, move on somewhere, with the one arm. And I was like, move on somewhere, leave it alone. And I was screaming. And my brother Jose, he goes to this school. He didn't live with us at the moment. But my brother Jesus, the one that dislocated my arm, he told them that he broke my arm or whatever. I came home with a whole cast. I was like, ah. It was really annoying.

Q:

Yeah, he goes here?

GUZMAN:

Yeah.

Q:

Jesus goes here?

GUZMAN:

No, Jesus goes here but he is-- I'm [? finna ?] be an uncle. His girlfriend's pregnant so he takes care of her, and then he works to make money for the baby.

Q:

Yeah, yeah, are you close with him even though you guys got into that fight?

GUZMAN:

Yeah, we've always been close. After that fight, he asked me if I was all right. He called me and everything. We've been always close. It's him and my biggest sister, the one that I'm always close to. Him and my big sister. Or if not, the other two always talking crap.

Q:

Yeah, what makes your relationship with those two different?

GUZMAN:

Because the other two, they talk a lot. They say I'm annoying and that I'm too hyper. I talk too much. That's what ADHD is, you can't steady. You can't be steady. You can't be-- you know what I mean, right?

Q:

Yeah, I got you.

GUZMAN:

You can't be in one place. So they always talk, so I don't get close to them. My sister, she understands because she has the same thing as me. He has the same thing but he has it worse. He has-- oh, what is it called?

Q:

Where he's just-- moving a lot?

GUZMAN:

Yeah, he plays with his hands a lot. He never realizes that he is. But he got better at controlling it. But he still has it and he understand the problem that I've been having. And he knows what I've been going through. He's the one that was there. Him and my big sister are the ones that believed me when I got arrested a few weeks ago. They are the only two that believed me.

My Jose-- well, the rest of my family didn't believe me. So my mom wanted me to stay in there.

So I was like-- that's why me and my mom were never close either. So I asked Sergio if I could stay at his house. Because they said if I could stay at his house I could leave. But Sergio had things going on, so I was like, I'll just forget it. My pastor said stay in there. He said I'm a disappointment to him.

Q:

Your pastor did?

GUZMAN:

Yes, so I stopped going to church. Because that's not right to judge somebody. You're not a person to judge. You're a pastor, you're supposed to give me advice and be there as a mentor. But he was never there.

Q:

Did you call him or did he come to see you?

GUZMAN:

Huh? I called him to ask him, and he told me that I'm a disappoint. And I was like, oh, is that right? I was like, just best believe that something's coming for you. But I was just threatening him.

Q:

Yeah, oh, on the call?

GUZMAN:

Yes. I was [INAUDIBLE] but he made me mad.

Q:

Did you like--

GUZMAN:

No, I never apologized.

Q:

I wasn't going to ask that. How often did you go to church before?

GUZMAN:

I would sing for the choir. I used to go every Sunday and Wednesday. For youth group it was Wednesdays, and choir was every Sunday and Wednesday. But since then--

Q:

When was your youth group? On what day?

GUZMAN:

Wednesdays.

Q:

Oh, mine was on Tuesdays.

GUZMAN:

But they kicked me out of the choir because I started smoking. My parents snitched. They said no smoking. And my pastor knows why I smoke. I told him before. Me and him were close but then I told him why. And he's like, there's no reason for you to be smoking. I was like, Doug, you told me the same reason-- it's basically the same reason you used to smoke.

Q:

Do you think he just trying to tell you what you're supposed to do but not thinking about when he was that age?

GUZMAN:

Yeah.

Q:

So this is in Milwaukee. When did you start-- you started going to that church when you moved here. Did your family go or?

GUZMAN:

Years go, yes. My family used to go years ago. It was like six, seven years ago. But we kept moving backwards and forwards.

Q:

So you had lived in Milwaukee before but left and came back.

GUZMAN:

Yes, four times.

Q:

You said your mom kept wanting to come.

GUZMAN:

Four times.

Q:

Oh wow, OK, yeah. Over how long?

GUZMAN:

Like, how long did it take?

Q:

When was that first time you moved here? How old were you?

GUZMAN:

I was 3-- 3, 2. in 2006. My little brother is a year before-- no it was 2005. So I was 2, 3 before my little brother was born. I don't know how I was. My mom just tells me I always cried for food. I still do. I still argue for food but food is everything to me.

When I was arrested I was inside the cell, I called my mama every day, and I was always asking for food. She's like, all you do is think about food. I was crying in there. I was like, I miss my sister. Because when I was at court I saw my sister and they didn't let me hug her or anything. So I was like-- it was just sad. But then I asked my mom to bring us tacos. They said she can't, or if not she has to go through a process-- a whole day process. I was like, that's a lot so just forget it. I cried for food because I didn't that food.

Q:

To bring outside food in. How long were you there?

GUZMAN:

Two weeks. The longest was-- my longest that I was ever arrested was for two months.

Q:

With other people your age?

GUZMAN:

Yeah. Well, it wasn't my fault. I'm always getting accused of doing something because they accused me of credit fraud-- stealing a bunch of used credit cards and using them. But it wasn't me, it was the dude I had beef with. And then the same dude, he came to Tech, and he accused me of stealing a car. And I got arrested again. I'm always getting arrested for something I don't do. I'm not going to say I'm not innocent-- I mean I'm innocent. I'm not-- But I am innocent from that.

Q:

Thinking about placed that you've been or now, what would you like to be different, or do you think would have been different if you?

GUZMAN:

For me to stop hanging around more bad crowds. Because that's really basically all-- why do

things happen? Because I hang around with bad crowds.

Q:

Yeah, are they your friends or just people you hang out with?

GUZMAN:

Yeah, friends.

Q:

Yeah, I thought you said you didn't have a lot of friends.

GUZMAN:

I don't but the bad crowds. In Milwaukee, I don't have a lot of friends.

Q:

Oh, OK, yeah. Do you think that's-- or do you like that, or no? Do you wish you had more?

GUZMAN:

I do because it's less drama for me. And I don't like drama. I hate drama. My brothers love drama. I hate drama.

Q:

Besides food and not liking drama, what do you think is something unexpected about you that you wouldn't think people would know just seeing you and not getting a chance to know you?

GUZMAN:

I'm a really chill person when you get to know me. I'm a really chill person. People don't see that because I'm usually hyper. But then when it comes to chilling or something-- like if we go out to eat or something, I'm really chill. I'm calm. When I'm around school or at home [INAUDIBLE] that's another side. But when I'm outside my house or school I'm a really chill person. But when it comes to being at home-- because I'm already used to being here and at home. And when I get too used to being places, I get hyper.

Q:

OK, so when you feel comfortable in places?

GUZMAN:

Most people know me by my name because it's Alfredo. And I bother people, and mostly girls.

Q:

Oh really? So do you introduce yourself to a lot of people, is that what it is?

GUZMAN:

Yeah.

Q:

How do you get to know people?

GUZMAN:

No, they just know me because my name goes around schools. But Bayview, I hate Bayview because I had pounded people over there. I wanted to get out Riverside but I was like-- I told my mom I wanted to move over to Riverside. I was like, no, because I'm in programs like the all-star. I was in Black and Latino. So I want to stay in those programs.

Q:

What's unexpected do you think that people wouldn't know about your community or the place l you live in?

GUZMAN:

That I live in a hood because I'm not the type of hood person. I remember like-- but get me made, I'm going to act all hood. I'm for real. Because my family is hood too. But when it comes to me being chill, funny person, you're just going to see like-- not trying to be offensive of anything, but a white side. I'm like a-- I'm not bad. I'm not like-- I don't send threats unless you make me-- you piss me off.

And when you piss me off it's like a whole other side. This school already saw my whole other side. I was going to really come over here-- because security put his hands when I had surgery. He put his hands on me. He pushed me out the building. And I was like, how are going-- like I was a mad man. I called my dad. I called my uncles. They all came over here.

Then cops came so we all left.

Q:

Yeah, what was it like coming back with that full cast on?

GUZMAN:

Dude, some dude hit me on my stitches. Dude hit me on my stitches. And I took off my-- what are they called that holds your arm up?

Q:

Sling.

GUZMAN:

Sling, I took my sling off. And I was ready to punch the dude. Don't-- my thing is you put your hands on me it's over. I'm not going to stop until--

Q:

Was he joking or serious?

GUZMAN:

No, he was-- because he kept bumping into me. I told him more than four times don't-- stop bumping into me. You see I'm injured. You wouldn't like it if I did that to you. He kept bumping into me. He did it seventh period, he pushed me. He pushed me first and I was like, chill, dude.

And then he punched me in my shoulder right there on my stitches. So I got up, took it off. He took off. But I took off right after him. He went downstairs to 150. 150's the detention room. I wasn't going to go in there but security was blocking my way. So I was like [INAUDIBLE].

Q:

If you could change something or think about how your community or you getting to be home, yeah.

GUZMAN:

If I could or?

Q:

If you could or what would you do if you could--

GUZMAN:

I would take--

Q:

Or now?

GUZMAN:

[INAUDIBLE] out. I don't like [INAUDIBLE]. Or my way of living is like-- I don't know how to say it.

Q:

Take your time.

GUZMAN:

I don't know. I live like-- do you know what YOLO means? You only live once.

Q:

Mm-hmm, yeah. Oh, YOLO, yeah.

GUZMAN:

So I live on the edge. So it don't matter what I do, at least I do it. If I don't do it I'm going to be mad at myself. Because I only live once so I just try living on the edge.

Q:

What do you-- where do you see yourself in the future and that?

GUZMAN:

Right now, I do not know. I used to but then when I started getting arrested a lot. Now, it's like I can't get a college with my record.

Q:

But what did you think about them before?

GUZMAN:

I wanted to be a professional mechanic or if not an engineer. Because at my life we worked in cars, technology things. Like new technology-- my parents don't like new technology, so we work on old cars that don't have computers. You know the touch-screen computers or something.

Q:

Right, the new Apple, everything in it.

GUZMAN:

They like the old so we have old cars. My parents like the old cars like the Toyota Corolla 1997 or something like that.

Q:

The ones that you need to restore to keep up?

GUZMAN:

Yeah. They like those because those are easier and you don't got to do all that technology bull crap.

Q:

How did you learn? Who was teaching you?

GUZMAN:

My uncles, my dad. They-- well, I started off going to street racing. Street racing is like life. It's what we usually do. We're not supposed to, but that's what we do.

Q:

Here?

GUZMAN:

Yeah, in Milwaukee. You barely see them around because they be like in the Summer. We'd have to go all the way to [INAUDIBLE] or something. We go down there because that's where all the nice cars are at. So we go over there to race the nice cars. We have the old cars but still, we have them souped up with two turbos.

Q:

So what's the most advanced thing you can do on a car?

GUZMAN:

Transmission.

Q:

Transmission? Yeah?

GUZMAN:

But I messed up my dad's car once trying to do the engine.

Q:

I was going to say engine block?

GUZMAN:

And I did it wrong. I forgot what I did wrong then I messed it up. And then he was trying to turn it on and it never turned on. So he had to buy a whole new engine.

Q:

Whoa.

GUZMAN:

Because I think I put the pieces loose and I guess it broke off. And then the pieces inside the engine broke too so I was like--

Q:

Oh, OK, so he was teaching you, right? So he knew what happened.

GUZMAN:

He knew what was going to happen. My uncle's car, he had a BMW. It was expensive. So what we did-- he didn't let me work on his car. I set the pistons or the breaks. But I did those good.

Those are easy, really easy. So I'm used to it.

Q:

So why do you think you can't do that now? Why don't you think you still can't do that?

GUZMAN:

Because I can't go to the college that I wanted to go to. It's a MATC but not here in Milwaukee.

No, it's not MATC, I messed up. Mech-Tech, it's called Mech-Tech. It's over there in Florida.

And they're cheap. It's like $10,000. I mean not cheap, but cheap. But I wanted to go because that's where my uncle and my dad went to. Because my dad first was trying to do a test to go

to the military, but he failed it because he doesn't talk English.

So he failed it, so they didn't let him. So he just decided to go to Mech-Tech. My uncle did too.

He made it to the army. He retired. And then now he's at Mech-Tech. I have an uncle, he retired off of the military. And he has his own business to contract things. I worked with him, but I stopped working with him.

Q:

Why is that?

GUZMAN:

His wife is a gold-digger. And she took his money and then he never paid me. So I was like, just keep that money, you don't got to owe me anything. Just the money you owe me, just keep it for yourself. Don't give it to her. And I quit. I told him I quit.

I had a job a couple of months-- not even a couple months. It was January before I got arrested. I got arrested last month. Yeah, it was three or four weeks ago.

Q:

Oh, when you had, yeah. This is when you were in there two weeks?

GUZMAN:

Mm-hm. I still work at the movie theaters at night from 12 to eight in the morning every night.

Q:

On school nights?

GUZMAN:

Yes.

Q:

Yeah?

GUZMAN:

Yeah, but it wasn't on the books, it was off books. You know what I mean. right?

Q:

I know what you mean, yeah, yeah.

GUZMAN:

So I used to work under the table or whatever, just to make some money. But then I quit because they paid me for seven days. I was supposed to get paid $650 because it was $50 a day. But no, they paid me $100. I was like I'm not doing it. I'm not going through all my trouble wasting my time to sleep to do this.

Q:

And that's what they told you when you started, they would do $50 a day.

GUZMAN:

Yeah. So I quit.

Q:

Do you translate a lot for your family-- for your dad? Yeah.

GUZMAN:

Because dude does not talk. All he knows is shit, stupid. He just know the curse words if not food.

Q:

Well, what is that life? Like here translating?

GUZMAN:

It's really hard for me because I'm not like fluent fluent. What? I'm not fluent.

Q:

Oh, in Spanish, OK.

GUZMAN:

Oh, you mean like school?

Q:

Oh, no, just in around in the neighborhood, like [INAUDIBLE].

GUZMAN:

I don't know. I get judged on by my looks. Because I'm not Mexican, I'm Puerto Rican. And everybody calls me Mexican because I look Mexican, obviously. But, yeah, I get judged on by my looks, and I don't like that. I'm not-- people always lie on my name. And I lost a couple friends two days ago because they lied on my name. I was like, I can't do that so you all got to go. Because you are not going to lie on my name, and I'm going to get in trouble for it. So I dropped friends.

Q:

Have you ever been back to Puerto Rico?

GUZMAN:

I want to go. But I'm scared to go but I want to go.

Q:

Why are you scared?

GUZMAN:

Because I had an uncle that got shot down there. And most of my family always gets shot at down there.

Q:

How much? Do you have a lot of family there?

GUZMAN:

Yeah, basically all my family's down there.

Q:

Yeah, was your family some of the first to move to move to main?

GUZMAN:

My mom was the first one.

Q:

She was? Oh, wow.

GUZMAN:

Yes. Because she used to be a paramedic. until she crashed into the hospital. She crashed the paramedic truck-- and whatever, the ambulance, inside the hospital. And it was sad

because she got fired. But at least nobody got hurt. But she doesn't like nobody to talk about it. I just be laughing at her. When I look at her and she's inside an ambulance. I was like, you remember this day?

Q:

Oh, you were?

GUZMAN:

No, I wasn't in there but I was like--

Q:

Not that you remember? Or you were--

GUZMAN:

Yeah, I'll be like mom, do you remember that day? I was a little kid. I was a baby. I was-- she went right back to work two weeks right after she gave birth to me. She went right back to work. Because she needed the money. [INAUDIBLE].

Q:

That's not something you ever thought about? Paramedic?

GUZMAN:

No.

Q:

Why?

GUZMAN:

But it does be funny because we'd be at the paramedic check for my mom. If it's not for my mom it's for me, because I'm the one always getting injured.

Q:

Oh, you meant-- oh, right, in paramedics-- in ambulances.

GUZMAN:

And then I'd be like mom, do you remember the day that you crashed the ambulance? And then the paramedics always laugh.

Q:

Was she working here as a?

GUZMAN:

Yeah, in Buffalo, New York.

Q:

In Buffalo? Yeah, also really cold.

GUZMAN:

Yeah, it's really cold. Snow down there. I heard there was a snowstorm awhile ago.

Q:

Huge, like a lot. But it's not as cold as here.

GUZMAN:

No.

Q:

I guess wrapping up, what would you want-- you talked about a little bit-- but what would you

want someone 20 years or 30 years from now whenever they were going to listen to you-GUZMAN:

I want a family and a job, a decent job at least.

Q:

What would you want people to know about you?

GUZMAN:

Oh, what do I want people to know about me?

Q:

Yeah.

GUZMAN:

That I can change my life around. Because right now, my life is not perfect, it's not decent, it's really bad. Because I got a record and I don't like that.

Q:

Yeah, it will change is you're saying? You will change it?

GUZMAN:

Yeah.

Q:

OK, we can close out there.

GUZMAN:

Thank you.

Q:

Thanks.