Richard

Columbia INCITE | Oral History_Sergio_Richard

Q:

Today's date is Wednesday March 6. My name is Sergio Muniz, and I am interviewing--

RIVERA:

I'm Richard Rivera.

Q:

From Bradley Tech High School. Richard, do I have your permission to record this interview for the 2019 Portrait Project?

RIVERA:

Yes.

Q:

OK. Let's start with your early life. Tell me something about your early life, your childhood, or where you were born, what it was like.

RIVERA:

My early life was complicated. I had to choose between-- to choose between who to live with, which was my grandma or my mom. But I had to choose my grandma, because I wanted to take care of her. That's probably the hardest decision I ever made. And childhood life was basically just-- I basically got everything I needed. I still got to see my mama. You know, she didn't live far away, honestly. To this day, she only live two blocks away from me, so I can just hang out with her.

But about my dad, I see him like, every holidays, you know, my birthday. I hang out with him all the time. I was raised here, a Puerto Rican. My family came from Puerto Rico, so I was-- you know, that's all I got to say about my childhood life.

Q:

What's one of the more memorable experiences that you can recall?

RIVERA:

Probably when I went to Puerto Rico to visit my grandma's side, like her sister and her brothers, how they live and stuff. It was pretty-- it was amazing. I'm not going to lie to you.

Seeing my grandma's sister again was basically like a mom reuniting with her son, like she hadn't seen her in weeks or something like that. It was like, a joyful moment for me. Because last time I saw her, she was walking. But now she can't walk because she had surgery.

Well, she could walk. But she could barely walk because of her surgery and stuff. It was amazing just to see who my grandma was raised with, and just realizing what she went through. And, you know, where my aunt-- where my sister-- I mean, where my grandma's sister lives is where my grandma's mom raised my grandma and her siblings and stuff. So I was like, damn, this where they were raised. I was like, this is amazing, still seeing the house

where there was raised in.

Q:

Like, through generations, for it to still be connected and still meaning something to you. How old were you?

RIVERA:

This happened before freshman year, in the summer. So at least it gave me a chance to actually go to Puerto Rico for the first time.

Q:

OK. And how did you-- besides that experience, what did you think of Puerto Rico, being there for the first time and kind of--

RIVERA:

I was like-- for the first time, I was like, this is it. I'm like, I'm finally here. I was like, I thought Puerto Rico was going to be something else that I imagined. But it was actually like a-- it's like going to a different city or something like that, just like, oh, dang. That's that, and that's this.

That's what I felt when I was there.

Q:

So you kind of got to see the stuff that you see in the books and stuff.

RIVERA:

Yeah.

Q:

[INAUDIBLE] Oh, this is like real life. How did you feel?

RIVERA:

I would say it was emotional, because I was like reunited with them and stuff. You know?

Q:

Yeah.

RIVERA:

Since they can't come over here, because they probably don't got enough money, or they just don't want to move over here because they still want to be there.

Q:

Right.

RIVERA:

So it was like, an amazing thing.

Q:

So you've mentioned-- you mentioned it a little bit-- I mean, your grandma and your mom saw- I see that they're important, right? What other people are important in your life from your community, from your family, friends, or anybody else that you feel is an important part of your life?

RIVERA:

It got to be my sisters and my aunt, because my grandma, my aunt, and my mama raised me to be the boy I am today. So what I want them to give back to them, since they gave me

everything, I want to graduate high school and be the first kid in the family to go to actual college. And for my sisters, just be the big brother I got to be for them.

You know, they love me I love them. And it's kind of hard for me because I don't get to see them like that. But they know I love them. Because I don't like going outside the house a lot, because for me when I walk out there, I'm not safe. Because yesterday, there was like, three gunshots in front of the crib. So I was like, oh, that's-- I was like, I don't even feel like going in school. Because I was traumatized for what happened. Because that could have hit anybody, honestly. And that can happen today if I walked out the wait outside for the bus. But I was like, I got to go to school. Because I need to do this, that, that for my grandma.

Q:

So sometimes you'd rather avoid just even going outside.

RIVERA:

Yeah.

Q:

Are you the oldest sibling?

RIVERA:

In my mom's side, yeah. But on my dad's side, I have a sister that's only like, two months older than me.

Q:

Oh, OK.

RIVERA:

Yeah. She was born in January, and I was born in March.

Q:

OK. OK. What are some of the things that you hope to do for your sisters and your mom?

RIVERA:

Probably when I make it out and go to college, play baseball, go to the big leagues, just give them back what they gave me. You know? Probably if I got that money, I would just buy them a crib outside Milwaukee. Because I don't think, you know, growing up in Milwaukee would be safe for young kids. Because you never know if they're going to be doing that, this, smoking stuff like that. My mom, when she was young, she was smoking that.

Q:

Yeah.

RIVERA:

But she don't want us to do that. She want us better.

Q:

Right.

RIVERA:

So she smoke to this day, but she don't smoke around us. Because it could affect us. It can get us addicted to it, or something like that. So she don't smoke near us at all. She would like,

probably go outside or go in her room. You know, when we walk in her room, you don't even smell it because she puts Febreze and all that. So that's what I-Q:

That's pretty cool. How do you think that-- or are any other important people that you think, or just [INAUDIBLE]?

RIVERA:

Probably also my stepdad, because I knew my stepdad before. Because he wasn't my stepdad. He was like, my god mother's brother, actually. And so I knew him before he was even my stepdad. So he's important to me because what the words he's told me. Like New Years, he said I want you to go to college. You know?

I want to be that cheerleader for you, so when you make it out and you play the big leagues, as long as I'm in the front seat supporting your name and stuff-- so that's really touched me.

Because usually you got other people saying my stepdad is that and mean. You know, I don't like my stepdad. But actually, my stepdad is actually an important person to me, as well.

Q:

Yeah. He's encouraging you.

RIVERA:

Yeah.

Q:

He supports your goals and ambitions.

RIVERA:

Yeah. He supports me. Because he don't like it when I'm here in Milwaukee, at all. You know?

Q:

How would these important people describe you?

RIVERA:

Caring for-- probably caring for and supportive.

Q:

Supportive? Outside of that, how do you think people perceive you?

RIVERA:

What do you mean?

Q:

How do you think the world sees you with a young Puerto Rican at Bradley Tech in Milwaukee?

RIVERA:

I think they probably think like, aw, he don't deserve to be in that school. Because, you know, he looks like he could be in that school, like probably a higher educational school. Because I'll take my grandma to go anywhere, you know walk her to Walmart, because we don't live that far. So I have to speak English first, and she don't. She only knows some words. But I need to speak for her, because she was born over there. And my mom was born over there, but she

speak for her, because she was born over there. And my mom was born over there, but she know English.

So I take it to go eat when she don't feel like eating the food she cooks. Because sometimes she cares for me, so she wants me to eat first. So I'm like, no, I want you to eat. Because you're important to me, and I got to take care of you like I promised you I was going to be.

Q:

That's a beautiful thing, man. We definitely got to take care of each other.

RIVERA:

Yeah.

Q:

How do you think people perceive youth of color in Milwaukee?

RIVERA:

So far, I haven't experienced no racism, at all. But probably if I'm old enough or something like that and I'm still in Milwaukee, they'll probably say something racist stuff like, oh, you're not supposed to speak English. You're Puerto Rican. So why aren't you speaking in what your language is, or something like that?

Q:

Right.

RIVERA:

So I'm like, I was born here. So if you don't like what I'm saying, just move around then.

Q:

Yeah. When I say community, what comes to mind for you?

RIVERA:

Neighborhood, my family, school district, friends.

Q:

A combination of everything?

RIVERA:

Yeah.

Q:

And how do you feel in that community?

RIVERA:

When it comes to school, I only mess with some kids. Because if I mess with the other, then they're going to put me in a bad situation. Some kids here, they gamble and stuff. I don't do none of that. I just want to-- like I said before, I just want to get out of here, make my family proud, get them what they deserve, like what they gave me. And probably my family as a community, like I said before, they can evaluate me as a young-- or when I get older, as a kid that used to be here and now he's on top, something like that.

Q:

What would that mean for you?

RIVERA:

I was like everybody else. I was that young. I used to be through that, but look at me now. I'm just on top. I climbed to the hardest challenges I ever came through in my life and stuff. I've been through that.

Q:

What are some of the obstacles or challenges that you've made it through and then that you foresee in the future?

RIVERA:

Probably the most hardest challenge I've been through is when, like I said, I had to choose my grandma over my mom. Because, you know, for me when I was young, I was at the age of 10, at that. I was like, damn, if I choose my mom or my grandma, I feel like they're not going to love me. But at the time, I chose my grandma. She knew why I chose her, because she was getting old at the time. Right now, she's 56, I think.

And after all that, that was probably the most hardest. Because, you know, my mom and my grandma used to live together when I was young. So they asked me, who do you want to live with. And looking at my mom when I chose my grandma, she understand it. So I thought she was going to be crying or something like that, like you see in the movies. I thought it was going to be like that. But actually, it wasn't. That was probably the most hardest challenge I had to go through.

Q:

What about in regards to the stuff you want to accomplish, and things you want to do in the future? Are there any challenges or obstacles you think you might have to face?

RIVERA:

Right now it's just passing high school. Because you don't think that's going to be easy. But when you go through it, it's hard. Something like that. So right now my focus is to pass, graduate from high school, and then go to college. That's probably just that challenge I go through now. And then when I graduate college or something like that, make it to the big leagues, then I got different challenges to do.

Q:

What do you think needs to happen for you to be able to-- you know?

RIVERA:

Probably just go to school every day and get my work done. Probably stay after, do some COC, I think. Because right now, so far right now I'm only passing three-- no, not three-- four or five classes. And the rest is two teachers that just don't think I'm useful. They think I'm just like every other kid that just comes to school and just do that, don't do work. I can't be to school because sometimes I got to take care of my grandma, or because the bus ain't coming because it's too cold outside. And that's probably just where I think from now.

Q:

Yeah. Sounds like you just kind of get judged--

RIVERA:

Of who I am.

Q:

--of who you are, without necessarily people knowing much about you. That happens a lot. So then I know you talked a little bit about wanting to go to college and baseball. Right? So what are-- tell me a little bit more about that, about the dreams and ambitions that you have.

RIVERA:

When I was young, I didn't think of doing baseball, at all. I was like, I want to be a police officer. That's what I thought when I was around five, six years old. Because they had me in an interview before when I used to go to [INAUDIBLE]. They had me interview. It was like, they asked me, what do you want to do when you grow up. So I was like, police officer. I do not think that twice. That was the first thing I just said out of my mind, police officer.

And that's where like, damn, do I really want to do that? Because the challenges I have to go through, and stuff, and what I've been seeing on YouTube and stuff, where officers have been doing racist stuff-- I don't want to be a bad guy like some officers are, like crooked cops or something like that. So I was like, I need to do something that's actually for me. I want to be a baseball player, represent who I am.

Q:

That's dope. So then what-- tell me a little bit more about that, when you said who I am.

RIVERA:

Like I said before, I live with my grandma. And Sometimes we have arguments, but at the end of the day we still love each other. Because that's part of family. We go through arguments, we go through with that, we go through fights-- not physically fights, but like, emotional stuff. So we go through a lot. Yesterday I had a argument with my grandma because what happened with the gunshots. I was getting mad, because I was like, I was traumatized. I was like, I don't want to go to school tomorrow, because you never know if that's going to happen.

So I tried to contact my mom and my aunt, and tell her to-- convince her not to come to school. But then at the end of the day, after coming-- this morning I wanted to punch my door.

I was like, what for? I'm doing something really stupid. I'm like, this is not the kid I was raised for. You know? I wasn't raised for to be a bad kid. I was raised to be getting straight A's, not doing drugs, no smoking, or drinking. That's not what I want to do. That's basically what I'm trying to be.

Q:

Yeah. And, I mean, there's a lot of things that go into that, right? Because like you said, that

you wanted to punch the door, but that doesn't necessarily make you a bad person. Right?

RIVERA:

Yeah. That doesn't make me-- it's just the anger just trying to take over me. But again, you just got to breathe and slowly inhale and stuff like that. So I try to avoid all the things that happened today. So basically what I'm going to do and the end of-- when school ends, I'm going to apologize to my grandma and give her a big hug. Because, you know, she did everything. She don't deserve that thing, what I did. And when I got in the bus, I just started like, damn, I really just disrespected my grandma. I was like, damn, she didn't deserve that.

She never disrespected me. She never did all that. So I bursted into tears, you know? So that's all I got to say.

Q:

Yeah. I mean, that means that obviously, that you care. You know?

RIVERA:

Yeah. Because, you know, she's not going to be here for a long time. She's not going to be there when I'm 50 years old or something like that. Because you're going to be watching me.

That's all.

Q:

Yeah. Family is a big thing, man. It's one of the things that drives me to do what I do. So considering all that, thinking about yourself, what do you believe makes you unique?

RIVERA:

Probably the way I could talk to random people. Because I'll be playing the game, mostly. I just basically just jam with who I play with.

Q:

Yeah.

RIVERA:

So I got a friend that I met on the Playstation. We've just been talking since-- to this day, we're being friends. He's the type of person I can tell my stories and stuff, like what happens in school and stuff like that. Because sometimes I can say that to my grandma. Because you never know what's going to happen.

Q:

Right. Yeah.

RIVERA:

But I could tell her some stories. So probably I'll say myself, like unique-- something like that.

Q:

Yeah.

RIVERA:

Because not all people can be the same. You can never get that chance back, because it's only time. Time goes fast, and stuff like that.

Q:

Definitely. So considering about-- considering how you see yourself, right, and how the world may see us differently that how we see ourselves-- thinking back on the black and white pictures that we took, do you feel that the pictures reflected you?

RIVERA:

For today and yesterday, I don't think that reflected me. But usually if that didn't happen, that would definitely, because I got three pictures I'm smiling in. I always smile when my grandma tells me jokes of when she was a kid, what her mom used to tell her, and when my mom and my aunt call. Because I don't call them aunt or Grandma. I'll call them Ma, because I have three. Because I call my mom Mommy, I call my aunt Mama.

No, wait. I call my mom Mama, I call my aunt Mommy, and I call my grandma Ma, because they raised me. And I've just been saying that ever since I was a kid. So I was like, that's not going to get over my head. I'm going to keep calling you that because they raised me. And probably those pictures, as you said, the rest of the day or yesterday doesn't reflect me at all.

But, as I said, if it didn't happen they would definitely reflect me. Because I smiled a lot. I'm the kid to be happy, no mad or anything else. You know, since I'm a teenage boy, it happens to a lot of kids. They get mad for stupid stuff, but not frequently.

Q:

Yeah. So then thinking about that, have you thought about what your final portrait might look like?

RIVERA:

Probably my final portrait will be me in a-- like, as in what I said in the interview right here, probably just me hitting a home run with a New York Yankees outfit, going home, running around the base, and just blow kisses to my mom.

Q:

[LAUGHS] Yeah. She's definitely-- she's got to be in the stands or something. Right?

RIVERA:

Yeah, she definitely got to be in the stand.

Q:

Or maybe all three of them, you know, all three of your moms. Is there any other ideas that you've had to how you would want to--

RIVERA:

Probably--

Q:

Taking it on a big scale, right? Because imagination has no limitations. So hitting the home run with your family-- what else? What other interests or things about you might you be able to infuse into it?

RIVERA:

I'll still have contact with the people I mess with today. You know, I want them to be there when I'm there. I want to be that when they're there, too. Because, you know, they gave me that. They give me their support. So I want to give my support back for being at least my friend, at least having trust in me and stuff like that, not going take on me because I haven't gone fake at all. I'm not a fake person. I just straight tell the truth. So just my friends being there for me, and I'll be there back.

Q:

That's what's up. What are some stories that you've heard from family or others about the past that kind of helped you understand what you wanted to be, or how you wanted to be?

RIVERA:

Probably that story that my mom would tell me before school started, like the day before school started. So she told me when she was young, when I was born, a couple months I was born, she used to sneak out the house and never come back for a week or something like that. And probably when she said-- when my mom called the cops on her because she never knew where she was, so she was scared that something bad happened to my mom.

And that's when we got in the court. And I was up for adoption, because the police took custody. And that's when my mom said to my grandma, can you give the custody to my grandma, like, my ma. And when she said-- basically when my grandma said yeah, I was like-when she told me that story, I started bursting into tears. Because, you know, I got somebody that really support me because what I've been through, or what they been through.

So to this day I'm looking at my mom as a mother figure. Because my dad-- I see my dad, like I said, every holiday he gives me stuff. She told me she loves me, and that's why I really-that's why I thought I really got somebody that really cared for me and stuff like that. She never gave up on me, even if she gave the custody to my ma, like my grandma. Because I still see her to today. She only lives two blocks away from me. So I visit her every weekend.

Q:

And what does that mean for you?

RIVERA:

Like, what?

Q:

Well, I mean, just having that experience, right? I mean, obviously having to go-- having to make that decision was tough. But then still being able to keep that contact, and still being able to kind of--

RIVERA:

Still having the contact is just amazing. Because, you know, I got my mama. So, you know, not everybody got a mama to hug kids. Because usually when they're born, they die or something,

like pass away or something like that. But I'm just truly thankful for having my mama, my dad, just my family. Because I probably would have dropped out of high school if it wasn't for them, honestly. I used to be like, oh, I'm tired of school. I'm going to do that.

Q:

Right.

RIVERA:

But look at me. I'm still in school.

Q:

And you feel like they're a major reason--

RIVERA:

Yeah. They're a major reason.

Q:

--why you're still pushing forward?

RIVERA:

Yeah. Because they may not seem like-- they might seem like they they-- I don't know how to say it. But they might not seem like-- say like if you're talking to them and they don't give the emotion you wanted, they might not seem like they hate you. They really love you, even if they don't say the way that you meant it, and stuff like that.

Q:

What do you think-- what do you think it means to them that you are the way you are?

RIVERA:

I think for them, one word, I think that I'm accomplished. That's one word, because I did everything. I'm about to pass high school. I'm about to be the first one to pass high school and graduate. So I'm just waiting for that graduation so I can even get a photo with them and shit.

Q:

How do you think they feel about you?

RIVERA:

Probably grateful.

Q:

Yeah.

RIVERA:

Because my grandma wanted a girl, because she only got two daughters. She got no sons, at all. So she wanted a girl. But after a few years-- for almost 17 years, because I turned 17 on March 22. So, you know, looking at her to this day as basically a mother figure, too-- because I know she loves me. And the way she gives me her trust, the way she expresses herself-because I'll be like, what happened?

You know, because sometimes she got bruises. Because when I'm in school, she be doing stuff by herself. Say like, she throws out the trash. That's why I'll be telling her, let me throw

out the trash now from now on. Because I don't want you to be hurt and stuff like that.

Because I don't like seeing her in the hospital. Because, you know-- but I would definitely say grateful. Yeah, just grateful.

Q:

And I'm sure they're very proud of you, man. It's not easy having to still push through when you only got certain things to help you with that. But family support, that's definitely one of the more important things in life for people. So you having that, I mean, I'm definitely glad that you have that support. Is there any other comments that you would like to make or want the world to know about you, about Richard as an individual?

RIVERA:

I would like to let the world know that to this day I'm not going to give up on things that's-- I'm not going to stop. If there's a brick wall, I'm going to try to break it through. By like, probably 2022 through all right, y'all probably will see me in the major league, and see me hitting home runs and stuff like that.

Q:

I hope so, man. I hope I get invited to the games, too.

RIVERA:

[LAUGHS]

Q:

Yeah. That was about all the questions I had. If you have any last comments or anything--

RIVERA:

No, not at the moment.

Q:

You're good?

RIVERA:

Yeah, I'm good.

Q:

All right, man.