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No Challenge Too Great A letter from the Rebbe
From the Publisher
Editorial I Mica Soffer
Anne Frank's Stepsister
Rabbi Yehuda Ceitlin
The Rebbe's Heart in Action
Tzemach Feller
Representing Crown Heights
Sara Trappler-Spielman
Waters That Speak
Chana Kornfeld
The Unsung Hero of Bondi
Tzali Reicher
Better Safe Than Sorry
Binyomin Weiss
The Weight of Ozempic
Tzemach Feller
Chof Beis Shevat 5752
JEM Gallery
Chinuch Matters
Sarah Pinson - MEF
Kids Korner
Fun I Sari Kopitnikoff
History’s Heroes
Activity I Parsha Studio
Quick Comfort Dinners
Food I Sruly Meyer
One Out of a Thousand Story I Asharon Baltazar
A Walk in the Dark Humor I Mordechai Schmutter ON THE COVER
A Chabad Shliach practices at a shooting range in the United States, Teves 5786. Photographed by Ronen More.
Dvar Malchus
By the Grace of G-d 15 Shevat, 5738
Brooklyn, N. Y.
To the Participants in the Weekend Seminar
Lubavitch Council for Universities and Colleges
107-115 Stamford Hill, London, N16 5RP
Greeting and Blessing:
I was pleased to be informed of the Seminar this coming weekend. Since time is a factor and, by Divine Providence, the event is taking place in the week of Mattan-Torah and Rosh Hashonoh Lo'ilonos, I am confident that the Seminar will prove particularly illuminating and fruitful.
"Man is like a tree," declares the Torah, Toras Chayim - the Jew's true guide in the everyday life. The analogy is instructive in that it emphasizes, among other things, that man's purpose in life is to grow and develop and produce "fruits" to be enjoyed not only by himself, but also by others.
No Challenge Too Great
Following the Frierdiker Rebbe’s Example of Unyielding Dedication
This reminder is especially relevant to young people, who are in the midst of their developmentin character and Weltanschauung - which will determine their future course and aim in life. During these formative years in particular - the Torah serves notice - one should bear in mind that the basic goal of a human being in general, and of a Jew in particular, is to be like a "fruit-bearing tree." The Torah shebe'al peh is even more explicit, as our Sages declare that the fruits of Tzaddikim ("and Thy people are all Tzaddikim") are the Mitzvos and good deeds.
A further point in the analogy is that a fruit contains in itself the seeds to produce trees and fruits after its own kind to all posterity. The inference is obvious.
Needless to say, to achieve the best results a fruit-bearing tree has to be cultivated when it is still young, and this is the time when every effort is rewarded out of all proportions in later years.
There was hardly a time when young people faced greater challenges than in this day and age, and serious efforts are required to face up to them and overcome them. However, the Torah assures us that when a Jew
is truly determined to lead a life of Torah and Mitzvos to which every Jew is committed from Sinai, he has the full capacity to do so and receives help from On High. My father-in-law of saintly memorywhose Yahrtzeit-Hilulo we observed a few days ago (10 Shevat) - has shown by example that where there is a firm will and determination, there are no difficulties that a Jew cannot overcome. To be sure, who can compare to his stature - but then the difficulties one faces in the "free world" are quite minimal by comparison, and many of them are more imaginary than real. Certainly Jewish youths, endowed with energy and enthusiasm and unafraid of a challenge, should have no serious problem in this regard.
May G-d grant that each and all of you participating in this get-together should rededicate yourselves to your real goal in life, as indicated above, and advance from strength to strength in this direction, with joy and gladness of heart.
With prayerful wishes for Hatzlocho, With blessing, /Signed: Menachem Schneerson/
Publisher
Mica Soffer
Editor
Rabbi Yehuda Ceitlin
Associate Editor
Mendy Wineberg
Contributing Writers
Asharon Baltazar
Tzemach Feller
Sari Kopitnikoff
Chana Kornfeld
Sarah Pinson
Sruly Meyer
Tzali Reicher
Mordechai Schmutter
Raizel Serebryanski
Binyomin Weiss
Design
Chana Tenenbaum
Photo Credits
JEM/Living Archive
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COLlive Magazine is published in print and online periodically by the COLlive Media Group Inc. and is distributed across the United States. COLlive does not endorse any products or services reported about or advertised in COLlive Magazine unless specifically noted. The acceptance of advertising in COLlive Magazine does not constitute a recommendation, approval, or other representation of the quality of products or services or the credibility of any claims made by advertisers, including, but not limited to, the kashrus or advertised food products. The use of any products or services advertised in COLlive Magazine is solely at the user’s risk and COLlive accepts no responsibility or liability in connection therewith.
FROM THE PUBLISHER
As we sent off this Chof Beis Shevat issue to print, our Yud Shevat was shaken by a disturbing incident. An unstable man attempted to ram his vehicle into 770 Eastern Parkway while the Rebbe’s shul was filled with chassidim and bochurim celebrating the 75th anniversary of the Rebbe accepting the leadership of Chabad-Lubavitch.
The NYPD responded quickly, stopping the man and locking down 770 while they searched for any suspicious items. Thankfully, there was only property damage and no injuries. By the next morning, 770 was reopened and once again serving as a hub for davening, learning, and community.
Still, the incident raised an uncomfortable reality. A site as iconic, visible, and constantly active as 770 requires more than a rapid response after the fact. It demands sustained attention, visible deterrence, and serious coordination between law enforcement and the community itself.
As one shliach told us in an interview, “When it comes to safety, we believe in nissim, but we can’t rely on them.” That mindset has led a growing number of shluchim to take personal responsibility for protection, as explored in this issue.
The urgency of this conversation was underscored by the devastating terror attack at Bondi Beach during Chanukah, during which 15 people were brutally and senselessly murdered, including the dedicated and beloved Shliach Rabbi Eli Schlanger HYD, the brother of my own brother-in-law Rabbi Shmuli Schlanger.
That attack, like the incident here, was part of a broader pattern of violence. Among the heroes who acted that day was Reuven Morrison, who was killed while trying to protect others. His courage and character come through powerfully in our profile.
Alongside personal responsibility, communal safety requires holding elected officials accountable. One example of how this can be done effectively is R’ Yosef Boruch Spielman, who served on the Vaad Hakohol of Crown Heights. His story offers a timely lesson in civic engagement.
Spielman argues that progress depends on working with whoever is in office, regardless of political alignment. In that spirit, Mayor Zohran Mamdani’s decision to come to 770 immediately after the ramming attempt and publicly denounce the attack was significant. His promise to protect the Jewish community must now be matched by follow-through.
In the coming days and weeks, Crown Heights will host thousands of shluchos for the annual Kinus, followed by the International CTeen Shabbaton and other major gatherings. We take pride in being a warm and welcoming community. We also need to ensure that we are a safe community as well.
Stay warm and safe,, MICA SOFFER
KEREN HACHOMESH CHARITABLE FOUNDATION
On the 22nd of Shevat 5748, February 10, 1988, the Rebbe returned from the funeral of his wife of 60 years, Rebbetzin Chaya Mushka Schneerson, led the afternoon prayers and recited Kaddish in their home on President Street in Brooklyn. The Rebbe’s profound sadness was palpable.
Immediately upon returning from her levaya, the Rebbe asked Rabbi Krinsky to arrange for the establishing of a charitable organization–Keren Hachomesh–with a mandate to support women in need and various charitable causes related to Jewish women and girls. This was the only time the Rebbe founded a new organizational corporation outside of the three organizations established by the Frierdiker Rebbe.
The Rebbe would encourage donations in the amount of 470 (the numerical value of the Rebbetzin’s name) in order to perpetuate the Rebbetzins legacy.
This past year alone many organizations received grants & countless individuals were helped in a discreet and dignified manner befitting the foundations namesake.
As a fund that holds profound personal significance to the Rebbe, the participation in its efforts is indeed a privilege and honor.
By Rabbi Yehuda Ceitlin
The Note from Anne Frank’s Stepsister
When Eva Schloss visited our community in February 2018, she brought with her a history that most of us can only imagine through a textbook. As the posthumous stepsister of Anne Frank and a survivor of the horrors of Auschwitz-Birkenau, Eva spent decades traveling the globe to share a testimony of her losses, survival, and her enduring human spirit.
On the morning after her arrival in Tucson, my daughters and I went to her hotel room with a gift bag and copies of her autobiography for her to pre-sign ahead of the large event we were hosting for her.
There was another reason for my stopping by; one that included some trepidation.
I knew from her previous interviews and articles that Eva often spoke candidly about the shattering of her faith. She famously described becoming an atheist in the Nazi death camps that had exterminated millions during the Second World War. She was unable to reconcile the existence of a "good G-d" with the human atrocities she witnessed.
I wondered if it would be imposing to invite her to join our family for Shabbat dinner that Friday night. Would she consider this a strictly religious function? Would she find the Kiddush over wine and the blessing to G-d over the challah offensive?
As we left her room, I casually mentioned the option of the
Shabbos meal. Eva said she’d be interested in joining and showed up that evening. She was gracious but mostly observed silently as we sang “Shalom Aleichem” and made Kiddush. It was understandable. How can one judge the faith, or lack thereof, of someone who has walked through the gates of hell?
On Sunday, we took Eva to Saguaro National Park and it was there that we saw her express enthusiasm. She wasn’t up for a long hike, so we took the openair tram up the mountain. She was wide-eyed and looked in amazement at the forest of cacti before her. It was clear that seeing them and the desert landscape brought her enormous joy. I thought the cacti exemplified her survival - the plants grow
and endure despite extreme conditions.
That evening, the atmosphere shifted from the quiet desert to a crowded auditorium. 1,200 people filled Tucson High School to hear her recall her memories. The Tucson City Council declared it "Eva Schloss Day" in her honor. After the talk, she spent time with people of all ages and backgrounds, signing books and sharing smiles.
On Monday morning, we drove her back to the airport, marking the end of her first and last visit to Arizona. Before she left, she inscribed one of her books for us: "To the Ceitlin family, It was a wonderful experience spending time together, especially Friday evening and meeting all the family. With love, Eva."
Reading those words was deeply moving. Of all the sights she saw and the honors she received in Arizona, she especially embraced the celebration of Jewish tradition and the warmth of family.
It reflected how she came to see the potential in belief as a tool for peace. As she once said, “Religion is something beautiful. It’s personal. And we should let everybody worship whomever they want without danger of being killed or persecuted.”
She believed the core of faith should be simple, stating that religion is supposed to bring good to the community and uplift those within it. "I always say the Jewish religion got Ten Commandments from Moses," she said in an interview. "If we
would keep just to this, that’s all we need."
Eva Schloss passed away on January 3, 2026, at the age of 96. In her long life, she had fully embraced the mantra of her stepfather, Otto Frank, who famously taught her: "Hate won’t take you anywhere. Love lifts you up." She may have struggled with the "G-d of the Heavens," but that Shabbos in Tucson, she beautifully embraced the sanctity of the Jewish soul. Her pintele Yid.
Rabbi Yehuda Ceitlin, Editor of COLlive.com and COLlive Magazine, is the Associate Rabbi of Chabad Tucson-Young Israel in Tucson, Arizona. He coordinates the annual Yarchei Kallah gathering of Chabad Rabbonim and Roshei Yeshiva
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This Is the Rebbe’s Heart in Action
A Conversation with Rabbi Shmaya Krinsky about Keren Hachomesh
Jewish girls enjoy The Space, a social and educational initiative which is a beneficiary of Keren Hachomesh
RRabbi Krinsky, when people hear the name Keren Hachomesh, some don’t realize how personal it is to the Rebbe. What is it, and why is it unique?
That reminds me of a time when someone asked me a very similar question.
A few years ago, someone in the community approached me—not at a meeting, not at a dinner, just in passing—and he said, very quietly and very seriously: “I’m looking to invest in something that the Rebbe held especially close. Something particularly personal to the Rebbe.”
I didn’t hesitate for a second. I told him: “Keren Hachomesh.”
Why was the answer so immediate?
Because there is nothing else like it in the Rebbe’s world. And once you understand how—and when—it was founded, you realize why.
The Rebbe personally established Keren Hachomesh in a moment of deepest personal loss, as a living memorial to the person closest to him—the Rebbetzin …
In all the years of the Rebbe’s nesius, it is the only organization the Rebbe established as a self-standing corporation, not as a fund within an existing organization.
Can you elaborate? How could it be that the Rebbe only established one organization throughout all the years of his leadership?
The premier Lubavitch organizations headed by the Rebbe were created by the Frierdiker Rebbe: Agudas Chasidei Chabad in 1939, Machne
Israel in 1941 and Merkos L’Inyonei Chinuch in 1942. When the Rebbe accepted the nesius, he preserved the structure the Frierdiker Rebbe established.
The Rebbe did not generally create new corporate entities. The Rebbe’s keranos—charitable funds—were typically administered within Machne Israel.
Keren Hachomesh is the one exception. It is the only entity the Rebbe personally created, not just as a keren, but as an organization.
And that alone tells you something about how deeply personal this was.
Take us back to the moment when the Rebbe chose to create a new mosad—a new corporation—for the first time after close to four decades of nesius.
This is something my father, Rabbi Yehuda Krinsky, often recounts.
The Rebbe had just returned home from the Rebbetzin’s levaya. He davened Mincha and said Kaddish. After a brief sicha and sitting down, the Rebbe went upstairs to his office—and then asked for my father.
The Rebbe discussed several matters, and then said he wished to establish a charitable fund in the Rebbetzin’s name. It would be called Keren HaChoMeSh, an acronym for “Harabbanit Chaya Mushka Schneerson.”
The Rebbe defined the purpose of the fund: to assist in matters connected to Jewish women and girls—chinuch, mikvahs, hachnosas kallah, and other essential needs in the lives of Jewish women.
This was at the very beginning of the shiva—just hours after the levaya.
Why was this such a priority to the Rebbe at such a painful time?
The Rebbe was in unimaginable pain. And yet, instead of turning inward, he was thinking about how the Rebbetzin’s life and values would continue giving strength to others.
Is that reflected in the way that Keren Hachomesh was established?
Yes. The wording in the official founding documents of Keren Hachomesh states explicitly: “The Corporation is being founded as a living memorial to Harabbanit Chaya Mushka Schneerson.”
A living memorial.
And the missions listed for Keren Hachomesh are not abstract. They are woven into daily Jewish life—and they guide every partnership and grant that Keren Hachomesh undertakes till this very day.
When people hear “Keren Hachomesh,” what should they picture?
They should picture faces.
They should picture a kallah who feared her family would drown in debt—and instead walks to the chuppah with dignity and simchah.
They should picture a woman in a remote city who, until recently, had to travel hours to reach a mikvah—and now has one in her own community.
They should picture a single mother or a shluchah who receives a grant after agonizing
over how she’ll manage.
A pre-teen girl on an outing with a Big Sister.
Or a post-partum mother finding strength again through the support of a women’s center. And they should picture the Rebbe’s and Rebbetzin’s faces. You’ve been leading Keren Hachomesh for over a decade now. What has that looked like from the inside?
It’s been both an honor and a responsibility. Over the past decade, the scope has expanded tremendously. This past year alone, we distributed over one million dollars in grants—and that number is projected to grow.
But the way that it’s structured is quite unique. Keren Hachomesh is administered by Machne Israel, Rabbi Yosi Friedman, and its in-house staff, Rabbis Moshe
Liberow and Schneur Brook, running operations. That means there is essentially no separate overhead.
This isn’t a fancy nonprofit. It’s a true keren tzedakah. Fundraising is constant, because our goal is that we should never have to tell someone to wait.
Whatever comes in goes out. What do you hear from recipients?
People in need often receive help from multiple organizations—a bit here, a bit there. But receiving aid from a keren established by the Rebbe is on a different level. Recipients feel that, and it affects them deeply.
That’s where the keren feels personal—and to me, that’s what makes Keren Hachomesh truly unique.
How do you deal with the
stigma some may feel about asking for help?
Our highest priority is to help those in need quietly, respectfully, and with sensitivity. People are grateful not only for the vital financial support, but also for the dignity of the entire process.
And beyond the focus on matan b’seser—giving discreetly—there is something else: the feeling of being helped by the Rebbe and Rebbetzin themselves.
The Gemara teaches that “whoever receives a coin from Iyov is blessed,” and the Rebbe explained that receiving support from a fund founded by a Rebbe carries a special brachah. Recipients sense this instinctively. We hear it again and again—not only what the money enabled them to do, but what it meant emotionally. The
"The Space" in Crown Heights
Scores of participants joined the Chicago Jewish Women_s Retreat, which was a joint project of Chicagoland
and a beneficiary of
timing. The feeling that someone was thinking about them. That they weren’t alone.
We hear this often: “It felt like a personal brachah from the Rebbe.”
Can you share an example of the type of grants issued by Keren Hachomesh?
Let’s talk about the mikvah in Mobile, Alabama. Until it was built, women in that region had to travel hours—sometimes an entire day—just to use a mikvah.
The shliach, Rabbi Yosef Goldwasser, shared with us that the mikvah now serves Jewish women across a wide region—people living hundreds of miles from Mobile. It changed the equation for those already committed to mikvah, and for those on a journey toward that commitment. Taharas Hamishpachah suddenly became
attainable.
Tell us about some of the other mikvaos Keren Hachomesh has helped construct.
Keren Hachomesh has helped build mikvahs from Nigeria to North Dakota, from Barbados to Saskatchewan. Places you wouldn’t normally associate with Jewish infrastructure—but there are Jews there. And Keren Hachomesh steps in to help make building a mikvah financially viable even for smaller, remote communities.
And now there’s a new mikvah initiative.
Yes. Anyone who has ever built a mikvah knows that beyond the cost, it’s a uniquely complex project. An engineer or architect may have built many buildings, but often has never built a mikvah—and is unfamiliar with its specific halachic and technical
requirements.
Communities can spend tens of thousands of dollars—and lose years—just developing plans before construction even begins.
So under the joint direction of our team members, Rabbis Brook and Liberow, we’re launching a new program that provides professional templates, designs, educational materials for construction professionals, and ongoing halachic guidance— completely free.
This removes enormous barriers and makes building a mikvah achievable for many more communities.
Let’s talk about Hachnosas Kallah, and the initiative that Keren Hachomesh just announced.
With pleasure. The joy of making a wedding today is often
Shluchos
Keren Hachomesh
accompanied by real financial strain. Families are under tremendous pressure, and many parents find themselves taking on serious debt just to marry off a child.
For years, Keren Hachomesh helped fund Hachnosas Kallah on an individual basis. But this year, we decided to change the equation by launching an allinclusive wedding initiative.
After a lengthy process, we assumed operation of the Oholei Torah Ballroom and partnered with many of the top wedding vendors to create a beautiful, elegant all-inclusive wedding package—for $29,500. That’s roughly half the average cost of making a wedding in Crown Heights today.
How is that going to affect the average Lubavitcher family?
The savings for families is
astonishing. Families are often forced into high-interest debt when making a chasuna. This initiative can save tens of thousands of dollars—giving parents peace of mind and allowing a simcha without panic.
Put simply: if we host just 70 weddings a year, it translates into more than two million dollars in savings for anash each year.
And in keeping with our goal of preserving dignity, there are no income requirements. Any member of anash, and any shliach, can use this package— no questions asked.
The weddings will be fully beautiful and top-tier, with top-level musicians, caterers, photographers, and florists. It will not feel like a “discount wedding.” It will feel like a
Crown Heights simcha the way it should be.
And it aligns directly with the Rebbe’s wishes.
Absolutely. The Rebbe encouraged weddings to take place in Crown Heights, and strongly encouraged avoiding overspending. And Hachnosas Kallah has been one of the core missions of Keren Hachomesh from the very beginning.
What other avenues of help does Keren Hachomesh provide?
Mothers. Mothers in financial need, and mothers in emotional and physical need.
For example, Keren Hachomesh supports the Miriam Motherhood Center, which provides a space and community for Jewish mothers in Crown Heights. How is Keren Hachomesh
The ribbon cutting at the Mobile Mikvah in Mobile, Alabama. A Keren Hachomesh grant helped fund the construction of this mikvah, the only one for hundreds of miles.
active when it comes to education?
Keren Hachomesh supports nearly every after-school program for girls in Crown Heights: Neshamos, Big Sister, Friendship Circle, Living Chassidus, Mogineinu, The Space—and many more. And it supports learning initiatives far beyond Crown Heights as well. For example?
We support programs that enable hundreds of girls and women to participate in learning initiatives, chidonim, halacha courses, and beis medrash–style learning—in person and remotely.
Jewish girls of all ages are joining Keren Hachomesh–funded programs that build character, strengthen identity, and help shape a more ruchniyus’dike life.
When you step back from the numbers, the programs, the logistics—sum up Keren Hachomesh.
It’s the Rebbe and the Rebbetzin taking care of their people in a deeply personal way— one kallah, one family, one community at a time.
It truly feels like this is the Rebbe’s heart in action.
As we approach Chof-Beis Shevat, the yahrtzeit of the Rebbetzin—this is the moment for anash and friends of Lubavitch to respond in kind. Keren Hachomesh is the living memorial the Rebbe himself established in her name, devoted to the real, day-today needs of Jewish women and girls: Chinuch, Mikvahs, Hachnosas Kallah, and vital support for families in need. On
this sacred day, we invite you to become a partner in that legacy, and help ensure that when a Jewish mother, kallah, or shlucha reaches out, the answer can be given with dignity, warmth, and without delay.
On the Rebbetzin’s yahrtzeit, help turn her legacy into real help for real people—one family, one kallah, one community at a time.
Partner with Keren Hachomesh today and help the Rebbe’s fund continue saying “yes” to urgent needs—immediately.
Keren Hachomesh helped fund a mikvah in Mobile, Alabama — the only mikvah in a five-hour-drive radius.
By Sara Trappler Spielman* * his daughter-in-law
Representing
Reb Yosef Boruch Spielman's role in shaping and growing a neighborhood
"“They say there are three things in this world that are given only to amateurs: marriage, parenthood, and government,” says Reb Yosef Boruch Spielman, 86. “When we were elected and began representing Crown Heights, we were all amateurs. All we had were the Rebbe’s brachos and the will to accomplish what we can.”
Yosef Boruch had been living in the Crown Heights neighborhood for only 3 years when he was encouraged to run for office in 1986. “There were people who insisted I run, and they campaigned for me and got signatures, so I agreed to do it,” he says about his decision to run for the Vaad Hakohol, which runs the Crown Heights Jewish Community Council (CHJCC).
He says the council existed until then, yet this was the first time residents would hold democratic elections.
“We needed housing — there wasn’t enough for the influx of families – and the community needed representatives to fight for their needs,” he says.
“The Rebbe gave the election committee dollars to distribute to each individual who came to vote,” he says. Candidates needed 100 signatures to run. Of 20 candidates, seven were
elected. Yosef Boruch Spielman was one of them.
Yosef Boruch says the work was divided into different factions: Rabbonim (Beis Din), kashrus, and the community council. Although everyone worked together for Vaad Hakohol, Yosef Boruch’s primary responsibility was the community council; Rabbi Levi Yitzchok Shapiro oversaw Beis Din, and kashrus was overseen by R’ Yossi Brook.
Included among Yosef Boruch’s responsibilities were housing, sanitation, safety, and residents' physical needs. He helped people get food stamps, Section
8, and other available benefits.
“Anything to do with the gashmius (physical needs) of the community, we were involved with, and housing was one of them.”
In the 1980s and 1990s, he successfully obtained housing from the city and developed 55 apartments at 520 and 565 Crown Street, 645 Lefferts Avenue, and 935 Eastern Parkway, some on Union between Schenectady and Utica, where Jewish families still live today.
“We took whatever we could get,” he said simply.
A Young Rabbi Spielman examining a newly printed publication from Kehos
Born on a Train
He was born the second of eight children to a family descended from Rabbi Yom Tov Lippmann Heller (“Tosafos Yom Tov”). His parents had been living in Munich, Germany, and his mother—pregnant with him— was sent ahead to England on a tourist visa with her brother, with plans for the rest of the family to follow. The plan was for her to give birth there, after which the rest of the family could easily obtain citizenship.
His mother and brother boarded a train from Germany to France, then planned to take a ferry to England. During the journey, she went into labor and gave birth to a healthy baby boy, Yosef Boruch, in Cologne, Germany, on February 9, 1939. The local newspaper covered the unusual birth. Yosef Boruch’s father later joined them in England, reuniting with the family as scheduled, and escaping the looming fate of World War II. His father secured visas that would allow him and his family to travel to either the United States or England. “America
was considered treif at that time, so my father chose to stay in England, where he could raise a family according to halacha,” Yosef Boruch recalled. The family permanently settled in England and survived the war years intact.
"Where Are You Sleeping?"
Yosef Boruch learned in Litvish yeshivos in Gateshead and Manchester and was taken by Chassidus through his studies with the chossid, Reb Yitzchok Dubov. Reb Benzion Shemtov, the legendary shadar (representative) of the Rebbe, raised funds for a one-way ticket for him to travel to learn in Yeshivas Tomchei Temimim Lubavitch in New York.
Upon arriving in New York on 23 Av 5717 (1957), Yosef Boruch went to 770 Eastern Parkway. He asked Rabbi Chaim Mordechai Aizik Hodakov, head of the Rebbe’s secretariat, for a Yechidus with the Rebbe. He was told the next available appointment would be in
two months. Disappointed, he asked that the Rebbe at least be informed of his arrival. That was on Tuesday. Two days later, Yosef Boruch was called in to meet the Rebbe.
Yosef Boruch says he first wrote to the Rebbe in 5714. “From that time on, the Rebbe took care of me,” he says, but is quick to add that “It wasn’t any different than how the Rebbe treated everyone else. But to me, it was personal.” For example, he says that the Yechidus took place around 2:00 AM and that the Rebbe asked where he would be sleeping that night.
“I answered, at Troy (where the Yeshiva had a dormitory),” he
recalls. “The Rebbe told me I should not go there alone. I told the Rebbe, I know the way. The Rebbe insisted, ‘mikol makom (nevertheless), go with someone,’ which I did. It wasn’t dangerous to walk in the late hours those days. It showed the Rebbe’s care.”
He married Esther Rochel Konigsberg in 1964. They rented a two-bedroom apartment on Eastern Parkway for $77 a month. He earned about $100 a week teaching six days a week at the Oholei Torah school, which was the average teacher's salary. Buying a house then—even with most priced under
$20,000—was out of reach for many Lubavitchers who could not afford a down payment.
The Emptying of Crown Heights
But the Spielmans weren’t thinking about settling in the neighborhood. True to his learning and hearing the Rebbe speak about Shlichus, he and his wife wanted to become Shluchim. “I wrote to the Rebbe and included the 6 shlichus offers that we had,” he says. “England, Mexico, Canada, and the United States. There were obviously way more options open back then.”
His father-in-law, Yeshaya Konigsberg, a diamond dealer from Far Rockaway, asked him to add to the letter that if the Rebbe wished, he could guide Yosef Boruch to learn the diamond business. The Rebbe crossed out the 6 shlichus offers and circled the word diamonds and drew an arrow to the side where he wrote the words veze ha’ikar (and this is the main point).
The Spielmans moved to Far Rockaway, and Yosef Boruch has proven himself a successful broker. He was even encouraged to join the Board of Directors of the Diamond Dealers Club, a position he was elected to
Rabbi Spielman says the brochos at his grandson's bris
repeatedly. Yet he didn’t forgo his shlichus aspirations.
“Once I was in Far Rockaway, I did there what any Shliach would do,” he says. “I had shiurim and brought local children from Far Rockaway to learn at Bais Rivkah and Oholei Torah.”
He relocated his family to Crown Heights in 1983.
“When I first arrived in Crown Heights, the neighborhood was still absorbing waves of post-war immigrants — Holocaust survivors and refugees from Europe and Russia who came with little. In the 1950s and early 1960s, housing was cheap but inaccessible for new immigrants.”
As the 1960s progressed, blockbusting reshaped the neighborhood. “Real estate agents would bring a Black family to a building or block and warn Jewish residents that property values would plummet if they did not sell,” he says. “Apartment buildings had four floors, and the fourth floor was hard to rent because they were walk-ups, so they put Blacks there so Jewish people would leave the building, and then agents started selling houses to them. It changed the demographics.” As a result, many Jewish institutions left, and crime increased.
The Politicians' Visits
With demographic shifts during this time came new challenges: housing shortages, crime, and at times, strained relations with city agencies. “We had to deal with the police to ensure the community was protected,” he says of his time in office.
“Sometimes the NYPD helped, but sometimes they fought the Crown Heights community.”
Crown Heights was small in number, so elected officials didn’t view it as a powerful
voting bloc. Representing the community meant dealing with politicians — whether friendly or distant, he says. “The community elected me, so I represented them, and I formed relationships with politicians to help the community.”
Yosef Boruch regularly attended meetings with senators, mayors, and commissioners, as well as any forum where Jewish organizations could advocate for housing, policing, sanitation, or protection. He also had one more advantage that other communities and neighborhoods didn’t have - the Rebbe.
For politicians, meeting the
The new offices of the Crown Heights Jewish Community Council (CHJCC) on Kingston and Lefferts
Rebbe was a privilege, and they all respected the Rebbe, he says. “They didn’t all understand what a Rebbe is, but they saw that the Rebbe is a leader, so it brings respect, and it promotes good things. It left an impression.”
Over the years, he brought many government and law enforcement officials to meet the Rebbe either during ‘dollars’ on Sundays or kol shel bracha at the end of a yomtov.
One sweet moment was when U.S. Senator Alfonse D'Amato, a Catholic, visited 770. "D'Amato means that you are permeated with love for the people around
"And the same thing is about Lubavitch: Lubavitch also means love of the people around them.” He later stood by the Jewish community during the Crown Heights riots in 1991, when groups of black men terrorized the Jewish community, which resulted in the murder of Yankel Rosenbaum HY”D.
The Rebbe recognized his efforts and advocacy when he once added the title “osek b’tzarchei tzibur” (engaged in communal affairs) on a letter to Yosef Boruch for Rosh Hashana. As for the officials and the impact these visits had, Yosef Boruch says, “They’re politicians. They
They don’t put on Chassidic garb. But they come, and we try to accomplish whatever we can.”
Asked for his thoughts on working with figures like Zohran Mamdani, a declared Socialist Democrat known for his antiIsrael rhetoric, he says, “The community has needs regardless of who the mayor is. Friend or foe, the mayor has the keys to help us solve our problems, and it takes experienced public servants who know how to deal with them. Of course, you need a relationship with the mayor. Hashem takes care of us. We don’t know what tomorrow will
David Dinkins –Candidate for Mayor of New York City
Senator Alfonse D’Amato –United States Senator
Lee Brown – New York City Police Commissioner
Ed Koch –Candidate for Mayor of New York City
Life of Chesed
Yosef Boruch served for 11 years on the Vaad Hakohol, from 5746 to 5757 (1985 to 1997). When he left, he told his successors, “The day you come in, you will have problems that you will have to resolve. The day you leave, you will have problems to resolve. All you do in between is try to resolve as many as you can.”
He says Crown Heights itself has changed. Once a neighborhood of refugees who had to rebuild their lives from nothing, it is now larger and more established,
in need. Today, some members of the community are very wealthy, which wasn’t the case before. “Traffic was an issue then, and it's a bigger problem now,” he says. Housing remains the most urgent issue, worse than it was 60 years ago. “Housing doesn’t exist today,” he states. “There’s not enough space to build new housing, and how can you have a solution if a house costs 2 or 3 million dollars?”
He sees how Jewish families are moving outward into East Flatbush and Brownsville and labels them as an extension of Crown Heights. “Their kids go to school in Crown Heights. They
not like they went into exile; they just found a place to live,” he says.
The food pantry that he ran from his home, an initiative he started while still serving in the Vaad Hakohol, is an example of his lifelong commitment to chesed. Over the years, he provided much food and necessities to families and individuals in need. This past Chanukah, he was honored by the Crown Heights Jewish Community Council as one of its “Eight Lights,” a recognition of decades spent working both visibly and quietly behind the scenes for the betterment of the Rebbe’s
Ruth Messinger –Borough President of Manhattan
Claire Shulman – Borough President of Queens
Rudy Giuliani – Candidate for Mayor of New York City
Howard Golden –Borough President of Brooklyn
By Chana Kornfeld
Waters that Speak
How Shluchos Are Reintroducing Mikvah to the Modern Jewish Woman
One of the most powerful mivtzas that the Rebbe introduced is Mivtza Taharas Hamishpacha. And to balance its power is a daunting task: Approach a Jewish woman, who may not have even heard of a mikvah, and present the mitzvah to them with the confidence that she will be open to keeping it. The mikvah conversation can happen anywhere; it unfolds in living rooms, over coffee tables, during strollerside conversations, and, of course, in softly lit mikvah
carried forward by shluchos who speak about one of Judaism’s most intimate mitzvos with clarity, dignity, and unwavering belief in the Jewish soul’s capacity to recognize truth when it encounters it.
Taharat Hamishpacha and mikvah are often misunderstood, particularly by women whose Jewish identities were shaped far from tradition. Yet time and again, Chabad Shluchos witness the same phenomenon: when this mitzvah is presented honestly, personably, and without agenda, something opens. Truth, when spoken with respect, finds its way in.
remarkable ways - and they happen to be sisters-in-law. Both have seen how the mikvah, when taught with depth and sincerity, can be transformative for women who never imagined it could be part of their lives.
Goldie Plotkin arrived in Markham over forty years ago, when the suburb north of Toronto had little visible Jewish life. “If you wanted Jewish life, you lived in Toronto,” she recalls. Markham was secular, distant, and seemed uninterested. She and her husband began their Chabad activities in their living room. Then the basement. Then a temporary facility. Today, there is a beautiful Chabad center on an acre of land that has expanded twice, housing a shul, preschool, Hebrew school, shiurim, and a stunning mikvah.
From the beginning, the mikvah was not an afterthought in Goldie’s shlichus. It was central. “Mikvah was always a big part of our shlichus,” she says, even though the community was young, unaffiliated, and often resistant. “There were so many misconceptions. Women imagined dirty mikvahs and associated the whole ritual with being ‘unclean’. There was a real misunderstanding of the word Tum’ah.”
Rather than isolate mikvah as a single practice, Goldie chose to situate it within a broader, compelling vision of marriage. Together with her husband, she created
a six-week course for engaged couples. “We start with holiness, bashert, marriage, building a home,” she explains. “We talk about communication, the spiritual aspects of love, and priorities. We play interactive games and we sift through what really matters.”
Again and again, couples were surprised by what surfaced. “They realized they had more Jewish identity than they thought,” Goldie says. “When asked to choose their top values, they chose tradition, respect, and children. They discovered they were a lot more Jewish than they imagined.”
Only in the final weeks did she introduce what she calls “the secret”: mikvah. She speaks about water, about mayim chayim, living rainwater, about the mikvah as a chok. “You can give a thousand rational explanations,” she tells them, “but at the end of the day, it’s a chok. Hashem knows best.” Paradoxically, that truth resonates. “That spoke to them,” she says. “Because we live in a world where everything has to make sense. And here was something deeper.”
Even though the Mitzvah of Taharas Hamishpacha is a chok, “so many couples found that keeping the mitzvah strengthened their marriages in very tangible ways,” Goldie says. The harchakos and rhythms of the mitzvah brought new energy to their relationships
and many couples happily continued keeping this Mitzvah after their weddings.
Goldie is careful never to decide for a woman what she should or should not do. “I tell my brides everything,” she says. “I don’t know your soul. I can't determine what you’ll want to take on.” Goldie remembers one bride reacting strongly. Her body language was stiff, and by the end, it felt as if she stormed out. She told her fianceé, “I’m not learning with this woman. I’m not doing this.”
Yet she returned.
Her fiancé, a psychiatrist, had listened to his bride repeat the crazy ‘rules of separation’ she had learned with Goldie. “He was amazed,“ Goldie continues. “He told his fuming fiancée, ‘This mitzvah is brilliant. I give this advice to struggling couples all the time.’” Today, Stacy and her husband keep mikvah, even though they keep little else. “She calls her children my mikvah children.”
Goldie speaks honestly about the challenge of teaching mikvah in a secular world. “You can’t even hand him a spoon?” women ask. “Yes,” she answers. “Because there’s energy in that. It heightens your senses. Your appreciation. Your connection.” She speaks from experience, through loss and hardship. “Life has challenges. I’ve raised a
"
The biggest obstacle is not resistance, but hesitation on the part of Shluchos. "
special needs child and I’ve lost my special needs child. Many couples don’t survive that. But when a couple is strong, they can handle the bumps together. Hashem, through the mitzvah of Taharas Hamishpacha, gave me my rock- my marriage.”
For Goldie, mikvah is also a personal legacy. She tells brides the story of her grandmother, Esther Golda Shemtov, who followed her soon-to-be husband, Rabbi Bentzion Shemtov, into Siberian exile, broke ice to immerse before her wedding, and built a life of mesirus nefesh. “When secular girls hear this
Guaranteed Blessing
Across the continent, in downtown Chicago, Chani Shemtov is having similar conversations in a very different rhythm. Serving the University of Illinois Chicago (UIC) campus and the West Loop for eighteen years, Chani does not see mikvah as a “kallah topic.” “I think of it as a Jewish married woman concept,” she explains. “Anyone I meet who’s married to a Jew, I find a way to bring it up.”
Sometimes it starts casually. A conversation at Tot Shabbat. A question over coffee. “Have you ever heard
the response, she offers more. “Maybe this is something you’d find meaningful. Something that can bring incredible blessings into your life.”
Chani is emphatic about one thing: “The world is ready to hear it. The women want to hear about it.” She believes the biggest obstacle is not resistance, but hesitation on the part of shluchos. “It’s our discomfort bringing it up,” she says. “Once you dispel the myths, people are incredibly open.”
She is realistic, grounded, and refreshingly honest. “I’m allergic to promises,” she says.
“I don’t say go to the mikvah, and you’ll have a baby or a perfect marriage. You get Hashem’s bracha, yes. But I’m not in charge of the blessings department.” That humility resonates deeply. “People respond to it. Who doesn’t want G-d’s blessings in their life?”
Chani has witnessed what she calls miracles. Reform couples who never imagined stepping into a mikvah. Women who once said “never” and then went not only once, but again.
“Ninety-nine percent are willing to try it once,” she says. “What’s the downside? You’re guaranteed bracha.”
One couple told her that mikvah was “the first investment” anyone ever suggested they make in their marriage. In the secular world, marriage is all about the
wedding, the honeymoon and bridesmaid dresses. No one talks about the lifelong journey of a lasting marriage. Chani still marvels at it. Shluchos have an easy way into a woman's psychological mindset. All women want a happy marriage and only Judaism offers G-d’s partnership in creating one.
“It’s so humbling,” Chani says. “If a woman says yes to learning with me, it’s Hashem opening their heart. I’m just the vehicle.”
Chani has seen the mitzvah of mikvah carry generational weight. “Shabbos and candles are beautiful,” she reflects, “but mikvah impacts families for generations. That pushes me out of my comfort zone to ask women to step out of theirs.”
She shares a story that moved her and illustrates the multi-generational impact that mikvah has: “I taught a bride and she wanted to know everything about the mitzvah. I taught her and when she was ready to immerse before her wedding, she invited her mother and sister to say Lchaim with her.
“In conversation with her mother and sister, they shared that there was another sister who wasn’t present and was dating a non-Jew seriously. ‘But she’s so happy’, her mother rationalized. I decided to open my big mouth and say what I thought. ‘If it made her so happy to harm herself, would you encourage her?’ I countered. That struck something in the mother and she agreed to speak to her daughter about true happiness and good decisions. The mother’s
heartfelt words impacted her daughter and she broke off her relationship with the non-Jew. Eight months later, she was engaged to a Jew and went to the mikvah before her wedding.”
Chani’s passion for Mikvah was shaped by her own complex journey to motherhood, including years of infertility before she was blessed with children, and by the emotional and spiritual questions she faced in relating to the mitzvah during that time. “I needed to make this mitzvah meaningful to me and learn it in depth, exploring it and connecting to it personally,” she says. That deepened her desire to share that richness with the women she meets. Both Shluchos ultimately speak to the same truth: that beneath layers of secularism, skepticism, and misunderstanding, the Jewish soul remains receptive. Today, with so many opportunities for women to visit state-ofthe-art, beautiful mikvahs and a wealth of resources to learn about the mitzvah in an appealing way, attitudes toward mikvah have changed. It is no longer the ancient and stigmatized practice of the shtetl, and women of all ages, stages and levels of observance are open to it. When mikvah is presented as an opportunity to capture infinite holiness in our mundane lives, women embrace it. The world is searching for meaning, for depth and for unwavering truth. And when that truth is offered with integrity and love, it awakens the soul.
"
The world is ready to hear it. The women want to hear about it. "
By Tzali Reicher
The Unsung Hero of Bondi
Reuven Morrison’s final act reflected a life that was larger-than-life
Reuven Morrison were certain about how he reacted. "When people heard he'd been shot, they said, ‘Knowing Reuven, he was running toward the terrorist,’" says his daughter Sheina Gutnick. "That was 100% characteristic of him.”
Gutnick, a mother of three, was at a Chanukah event in Melbourne, Australia, when a friend approached her to share news about a shooting at the Chanukah at the Sea event in the Sydney suburb. Her father Reuven was an active member of Chabad of Bondi and would attend the event each year.
She first tried calling her father but received no answer. She then called her mother, Leah, and heard the
on the ground. They're working on him." Following that, she was told, 'Tatty's gone," and that he was covered with a sheet.
Footage showed Morrison, 62, running towards one of the terrorists to stop him from harming others. Morrison threw a brick at the terrorist and even picked up the terrorist’s gun that had been wrestled away by Ahmed al-Ahmed, a Syrian-born Muslim bystander. According to eye-witnesses, Morrison was trying to divert the terrorist’s attention away from a woman and two children she was shielding. He was shot 10 times. “Your father saved so many people,” many told his family.
daughter says. “When someone we knew passed away, he’d always say ‘a body is just a body, they’re back with Hashem now.’ We'd always tell him, ‘You Russian people need to learn how to process your emotions!’ My mother and I now keep saying this is the biggest gift Tatty could have given us. He believed this so strongly and passed it on to us. He knew this world is an olam sheker and only temporary, and he wasn’t afraid.
“When a neshama comes down to live a life, we know it comes down for a predetermined time. And if he could choose how his neshama should return to the heights it came from, we know dying al kiddush Hashem protecting his beloved Bondi community would be what he’d choose. And we all saw him make that choice.”
A childhood photo from Kiev
Morrison’s bravery was likely inspired by his upbringing. He was born on 12 Tammuz 5723 (July 4, 1963) in Kyiv, during an era where religion was suppressed in the Soviet Union. His family wasn’t observant (no one they knew was), but Morrison remembered his grandfather, a melamed with a long white beard, and the horrific stories of his family's experiences under Communism.
His mother was tough as nails. One day, a young Reuven Morrison came home from school, bloodied from beatings by teachers and peers for being Jewish. They lived right next door to the school, and his mother grabbed a rolling pin from the kitchen and marched down to the schoolyard herself. Not about to let her son
When he was 14, his parents secured a visa to leave the USSR. The family spent a year in Italy and finally settled in Sydney, Australia, where his uncle had already made a home. They arrived with no money to their name. The family anglicized their name from Mariason to Morrison upon arrival.
After spending exactly one day in school, Reuven decided that standardized education wasn't for him and started an apprenticeship as a locksmith. Hardworking and resourceful, he soon began supporting himself and helping his parents with daily expenses.
In the 1970s, the growing immigrant
earlier and also had memories of Jewish life under the threat of Soviet prosecution. She remembered sneaking matzah home in a pillowcase before Pesach, hiding it so her family could hold a seder in secret.
In March 1983, the couple were set to be married and booked the celebration in a non-kosher venue, as many other Russian-born couples did. In a clear case of Hashgacha Pratis, the venue burnt down two weeks before the wedding. The only place available that day was the hall at B'nai B'rith NSW. Against all their plans, they had a fully kosher wedding.
Lighting the menorah at a F.R.E.E. Chanukah event on Bondi Beach in 1998
A young Sheina Gutnick with her father
At a Chabad Bondi Gala dinner
Pictured with Rabbi Moshe Gutnick and Rabbi Yehoram Ulman at the opening event for Chabad Bondi in 2024
A Shabbos to Recover
Reuven Morrison’s entrepreneurial spirit was evident in the many jobs he took on during those early years. He owned a petrol station and a potatopacking farm, and imported apples from Russia to produce applesauce in Australia. He gave generously to others (even his family did not know the full extent of his tzedaka because he funneled it through intermediaries, ensuring recipients would never know it came from him).
Despite his ventures and successes, Reuven and Leah Morrison struggled with something painful that cast a dark cloud over their lives: they were childless. For 11 years, they experienced miscarriages, ectopic pregnancies, and devastating infertility. Doctors told them they’d never have children.
Understanding that assistance could only come from Heaven, a friend suggested they speak to someone religious. They were referred to Rabbi Yehoram and Shternie Ulman, the Directors of F.R.E.E. (Friends of Refugees of Eastern Europe), which is now known as Chabad of Bondi. It was the beginning of a deep friendship that would endure for over three decades.
The Ulmans suggested that the Morrisons write to the Rebbe. The year was 5754 (1994). They wrote a ‘pan’ letter, and then opened a volume of the Rebbe’s Igros Kodesh, hoping for direction. They concluded from the letter that Reuven should undergo a bris, which he'd never had, and Leah should go to the mikvah.
Reuven scheduled his bris on a Friday so he'd have the weekend to recover.
The date was Friday, Rosh Chodesh Tammuz. They sent a fax to the Rebbe’s office before Shabbos. That Motzoei Shabbos was the dark day of Gimmel Tammuz 5754. The Morrisons
believed the Rebbe’s bracha was still valid. Indeed, within a month, Leah became pregnant with no fertility treatments. On the 30th of Nissan 5755, Leah gave birth to a healthy baby girl. They named her Sheina, who would be their only child.
While in the hospital, they were visited by a friend, Mrs. Chaya Kaye. She helped them write another letter and then opened the Igros Kodesh. They were stunned by what they read. On one side of the page, the Rebbe congratulated a family on the birth of their baby girl, dated 30 Nissan. The other side contained the Rebbe’s advice on raising and educating a Jewish child.
The Morrisons were unsure about their relationship with Yiddishkeit. From that point on, slowly but surely, Reuven Morrison transformed into a different person—or perhaps uncovered who he had always been meant to be.
International Outcry
Over the next few years, a yarmulke became a permanent fixture on Reuven’s head and the beard grew in. Leah started covering her hair. With these changes, his business ventures became wildly successful. He built a development company that thrived and wouldn’t make a single decision without first writing to the Rebbe.
At home, Reuven kept bookshelves full of documentation: every business project, the letter he wrote seeking guidance, the Rebbe's response, the hachlata he made in the merit of the venture succeeding, the outcome, and the tzedakah he gave afterward.
“He'd say he was too simple to figure things out on his own, so he needed direct answers from the Rebbe,
which, thank G-d, he got,” Sheina remembers. “His love for the Rebbe was so simple and real. He'd write letters to the Rebbe saying, ‘Rebbe, I love you.’ I'd never seen anything like that from anyone else. No beating around the bush.”
In 2006, Reuven received a clear message through the Igros Kodesh: he should build a community center for Russian Jews. “From that moment, it became his baby, his mission,” his daughter says. “He fought tooth and nail—against council regulations, against business partners who told him it was impossible, against obstacle after obstacle, to get it over the line. The Rebbe said to build a shul, and so a shul had to be built.”
The land had originally been used as tennis courts, and Chabad was struggling to convince the council to rezone it for their center. One Motzoei Shabbos, that week’s Living Torah by JEM showed the Rebbe touring Camp Gan Israel in New York. The video showed how when passing the tennis courts, the Rebbe commented, “We don't need tennis courts.” Incredibly, they learnt that earlier that Shabbos, they had gotten the permits to rezone the land from tennis courts to the shul.
In 2017, they faced another hurdle with the building permit being denied over fear that a shul could become the target of a terror attack. It led to an outcry and international headlines. “Jewish leaders said the decision was antiSemitic and a sop to terrorists,” the JTA reported. The decision was soon reversed. The spacious new shul and center opened its doors ahead of Tishrei 5785. A decade and a half of Reuven’s determination and partnership with the Ulmans and Rabbi Eli Schlanger made it happen.
Between Sydney and
Writing to the Rebbe led Reuven Morrison on another major life change in 2006, when he searched for the best possible Jewish education for his daughter. “He got a clear answer that we should go to Melbourne for the chinuch. Literally the next morning, my father woke me up and said, ‘Pack your bags, we’re moving to Melbourne,’” Sheina says with a laugh.
Sheina soon began learning at Beth Rivkah Lubavitch in East St Kilda, Melbourne. Her mother Leah lived with her, while her father commuted constantly, flying and driving back and forth between overseeing work in Sydney and visiting the family in Melbourne.
“Melbourne became his adopted town,” his daughter says. “While Sydney was his shul and community, Melbourne became a large part of his life as well, and he became very close to the community and
Whether in Sydney or Melbourne, the Morrisons had an open home, hosting community members, Russian friends, bochurim, and seminary girls. His daughter says that people loved coming over to speak with him.
He left a lasting impact on everyone he met, sometimes by helping them financially, but often more times just by speaking with his trademark straighttalking authenticity, she said. “When he walked into a room, you knew it. He was genuine, loyal to a fault, and did everything in a big way. He lit up every room he walked into with his big personality and massive energy.”
His life was even more anchored in Melbourne after Sheina was married and settled there with her husband, Josh Gutnick. Their twin girls, almost eight years old, and their toddler adored their Zaida. They especially cherished his bedtime routine when he would read to the grandchildren ‘The Last Children
buried in Israel
of Tarshish,’ a series from the 1990s, which he read to Sheina as a child. “He wanted to spend as much time as he could with his grandchildren and with us,” Sheina said. “We were his world.”
This past May, Reuven fulfilled a dream: he took his entire family— Leah, Sheina, her husband, and the grandchildren—to the Holy Land of Israel for a month. They came home two days before the Iran war broke out. “It was everything he'd wanted, to share the holy city with the grandchildren he adored,” Sheina said.
His next dream was to take them to New York, to the Rebbe.
A Life of Puzzle Pieces
That dream, and his larger-thanlife life, was brutally cut short on Chanukah. On the morning of the levaya, the forensic homicide detective sent the family photos of everything on Reuven when he was shot. Amongst the items was a small yellow note with Hebrew handwriting.
It was from R’ Noach Segal, a man from Yerushalayim whom Reuven had befriended on one of Segal’s visits to Australia years earlier. During a trip to Israel 6 months earlier, Segal had gifted him a bottle of wine, some chocolates, and a note. “May you be comforted the rest of your days in Jerusalem,” it read. For some inexplicable reason, this tiny sticky note from six months earlier was in Reuven’s pocket when he was murdered.
thoughts he wanted to convey crossed out and rewritten. He wrote how proud he was of Sheina's work in the area of Taharas Hamishpacha, one of the Rebbe’s 10 Mitzvah Campaigns, and the mitzvah Reuven credited for the blessing of her becoming a father.
Reuven had always told his family he wanted to be buried in Eretz Yisroel, amongst those lying in their eternal rest. At 62, he'd been talking about it for years, unusual for someone of that age. Deciding where to bury him after the terror attack, the family had him buried in Melbourne with a condition that he be brought to Israel in twelve
“That letter has given me so much strength,” Sheina says emotionally about her work as a kallah teacher and with the Tahareinu organization. “He was so proud and had so much nachas from his family.”
It’s been a trying time for Leah, Sheina, and her family. Her twin girls know their Zaida was a hero. They've written it in their
otherworldly, but that was literally my father's whole life,” Sheina reflects. “Story after story after story. His life was a series of puzzle pieces. Everything seemed impossible, yet each step came together, creating this beautiful picture. And we're missing that last puzzle piece—why did he have to go back to Hashem at 62 years old, leaving us here, asking why?”
“Until we’re reunited once more, he will forever be remembered for his generosity, the shul he fought so hard to build, and the mesiras nefesh with which he died al kiddush Hashem. But most of all, he was a soldier of the Rebbe,” Sheina says simply. “A chossid. That’s how Reuven Morrison should be remembered.”
Cardiology
Dermatology
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ENT
Gynecologic Oncology
Internal Medicine
Neurology
Occupational therapy
Ophthalmology
Optometry
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Pain Management
Pediatrics
Physical therapy
Podiatry
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Psychiatry
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By Binyomin Weiss
BETTER SAFE THAN S RRY
How Chabad Shluchim (and Shluchos!) are arming themselves for protection
Photos by Ronen More
This past Hei Teves, a young shliach walked into the Atica men’s clothing store in Crown Heights, wanting to buy a new pair of black pants. “I’m looking for a size 32 waist,” he told the clerk.
“That would be big on you,” the salesman replied. “You’re a size 30.”
“I need the two extra inches for my handgun,” the shliach explained.
Two fellow shluchim, also in New York and within earshot, hurried over. Both had been carrying concealed weapons for some time and were eager to share their experience with a new gun owner.
The young shliach recounted that the morning after the terror attack at Chabad of Bondi’s Chanukah celebration in Sydney, Australia, he purchased a Smith & Wesson M&P Bodyguard 2.0, a compact handgun.
“I’d thought about carrying for a while,” he said. “After that, it was a
no-brainer.”
In recent years, a striking pattern has emerged in antisemitic attacks outside of Israel. Many assaults have targeted Jewish people and institutions. A disproportionate number of these have focused on Chabad centers and schools, including vandalism, arson, and attempted firebombings.
Over the past two decades, records show that of the six rabbis murdered in terror attacks, four were Chabad shluchim, along with one shlucha. Another, Rabbi Yisroel Goldstein, narrowly survived the 2019 shooting attack at Chabad of Poway in California, where one congregant, Lori Kaye, was killed.
Documented cases from the past two decades include Rabbi Gabi Holtzberg and his wife Rivky, murdered during the 2008 Mumbai terror attacks at their Chabad House in India; Rabbi Zvi Kogan, a Chabad shliach abducted and murdered in the United Arab
Emirates in 2024; and Rabbis Eli Schlanger and Yaakov Levitan, Shluchim killed in the 2025 Bondi Beach attack (alongside 13 others).
This disproportionate toll reflects Chabad’s global footprint and prominent role in public Jewish life. Attacks on Chabad institutions occur at a rate exceeding the movement’s numerical share of Jewish institutions. This is due to its high visibility, open-door policy, and presence in remote or lightly secured locations. Numerically, the fatality rate among Chabad shluchim over the past twenty years is comparable to that of U.S. law enforcement.
As a result, a growing phenomenon has developed among shluchim—and shluchos—particularly in the United States. Alongside reinforced buildings, surveillance systems, and hired security (full or part-time), some
2008 terror attack in Mumbai, India
2019 terror attack in Poway, CA
are dedicating time to firearms training, while a smaller number are choosing to carry.
“It’s the new reality,” said the young shliach, who asked not to be identified. “We’d rather be safe than sorry.”
POLICE OFFICER'S COMMENT
One such early adopter of this approach is Mrs. Nechama Eilfort, shlucha of Chabad at La Costa in Carlsbad, California. She is known in her community for carrying a Smith & Wesson M&P Shield, a slim and lightweight microcompact 9mm pistol.
“I do not like guns,” she told COLlive in an interview. “I also do not like changing diapers. But there are things you do because they are necessary. We are visible with our families and communities. Even very liberal
people (in my community) are glad to know I am armed. They know me as level-headed and responsible. If someone faints, I’m usually the first to run over. It is the Jewish mother instinct.”
Mrs. Eilfort was born in Boston, the eldest of four children, and grew up in Worcester until sixth grade, when her family moved to Brooklyn, New York. There, she attended Bais Yaakov Elementary and later Bais Rivka High School in Crown Heights. After graduating from high school, she studied at JTTC Seminary in Gateshead, England, and at Touro College in Manhattan.
In 1988, she married Rabbi Yeruchem Eilfort and moved on Shlichus to California. First, they lived in Irvine, then later in the San Diego area. Like many shluchim, they began modestly, running programs out of their living room. In 2015, they inaugurated a 12,000-square-foot center. The center includes a shul,
preschool, commercial kitchen, and library. The property and building are gated.
Her approach to security grew gradually, shaped by lived experience rather than ideology. "My father had a gun in Massachusetts, so I was familiar with the concept and would go to the shooting range because I wanted to be comfortable and knowledgeable."
The turning point came in 1992 after riots shook Los Angeles, following the acquittal of four police officers for using excessive force on Rodney King, an African-American man. I remember hearing a police officer say, "If someone comes into your home, take out your gun." I asked, "What gun?"
The officer replied, "Don’t you have one? Who do you think is responsible for your own protection?" To me, knowing CPR or fixing a flat tire is a basic form of preparedness; a police
2025 terror attack, Bondi Beach, Australia
Funeral of Rabbi Zvi Kogan after the terror attack in Dubai, UAE, 2024
officer cannot always be there.
It led her to purchase her first gun and keep it either at home or at the Chabad center. The Second Amendment allows you to own a firearm on your property, she explained. "Carrying it outdoors is another story. For that, you need a CCW, and I didn't think of getting one at the time."
CCW, or a Concealed Carry Weapon permit, allows legal concealed carry of a handgun. Requirements vary by state, but they usually include being at least 21, passing a background check, completing a firearms safety course, and demonstrating livefire skills. Permits do not grant access to sensitive places like schools, government buildings,
or private properties where carrying is restricted. Permit holders often must inform law enforcement if they are armed.
FALSE NARRATIVE
The attack on Chabad of Mumbai in 2008, murdering the Shluchim and guests, gave Mrs. Eilfort an added sense of personal responsibility. “After Mumbai, I knew I wanted a concealed-carry permit,” she said. “I wanted to be fully legal, with a firearm at home and in the office, and to ensure safety in shul and while traveling."
For Mrs. Eilfort, preparedness extends beyond herself. When
her children reached bar and bas mitzvah age, she took them to the shooting range. “We are a gunaware family,” she said. “Safety around firearms was essential.” She notes that today, all of her children carry firearms.
Despite her long-standing involvement, Mrs. Eilfort says the topic remains sensitive in communal spaces. “People have asked me for years to speak about this at the Kinus Hashluchos in New York,” she noted. “Every year, I’m told that emails requesting a workshop are sent to organizers, but I haven’t yet been formally invited.”
She believes much of the resistance stems from stigma. “People say we’re the People of the Book; We are peaceful, not fighters. But Dovid HaMelech was a fighter. We were never sheep. The idea that Jews went quietly to their deaths is a false narrative. What is more, Lubavitch women are not passive. We are movers, shakers, and leaders. The surprise this topic generates feels strange to me."
Still, she said that during the Kinus convention, fellow Shluchos will come over to her to consult. She is careful to stress to them that carrying a gun is not about bravado or aggression. Concealedcarry permit holders, she added, are overwhelmingly law-abiding citizens. “A person carrying a gun is not a cowboy,” she said. “It is the opposite. The point is modesty— staying in the background unless needed. I never needed to draw my gun, but I did have a few incidents that were defused because they saw that I had one.”
For Mrs. Eilfort, firearm ownership is not an identity or statement. It is another layer of readiness—uncomfortable,
serious, and sometimes necessary in her view. She is now among a few Shluchos in the San Diego area who carry. Actual statistics on Shluchim and Shluchos who own firearms are not known or have not been made public to date.
"Only Hashem can ensure our safety, but we must do our part, like wearing a seatbelt in a car,” she concluded. “You own a gun in the hopes that you will never need to use it.”
TWO SHLUCHIM, TWO APPROACHES
Not all shluchim who own firearms reach the same conclusions. Two rabbis interviewed for this article—Rabbi Zev and Rabbi Aharon—both have guns, both take security seriously, and both avoid boasting about it. They both asked not to be identified by name. Yet, their approaches diverge sharply.
Rabbi Zev has been on shlichus for 8 years and has been a gun owner for 5 years. He has a SIG Sauer P365, a compact handgun ideal for concealed carry, but rarely carries it. “I don’t carry mine for the most part,” he said. “When there’s something significant that requires security, I prefer having trained security personnel carry, not myself.”
A gun, he believes, is a tool that demands constant training, coordination, and self-awareness, especially in communal settings. “If you’re going to have a bunch of people carrying in a shul, they all have to be on the same page,” he explained. “Friendly fire is a real concern.”
He bought the gun through a
member of his community who encouraged him and helped with the purchase. It was completed through legal channels, including a background check. In his state, firearm ownership is common, with about one registered gun per resident.
Asked if his community knows that he owns a gun, Rabbi Zev said he is unsure how many people in his community are aware of it and does not consider it a focal point of his role. "I don't hide it, but I also don't scream it from the rooftop," he clarified. He is particularly wary of the assumption that possession equals preparedness. “Some people freeze with a gun,” he noted, referencing recent
attacks in which even trained individuals were unable to respond effectively. “You have to know yourself, your limits, and what you would actually be capable of doing.”
Then there are the legal ramifications. Carrying a firearm, he said, means accepting the likelihood of arrest and legal scrutiny if anything happens, regardless of fault. He strongly advises firearm insurance and a deep familiarity with local use-of-force laws. “Even if you’re legally justified, killing someone carries a heavy toll—emotionally and legally,” he said. “You want to reduce damage wherever possible. Every state is different. People
confuse the rules, and that’s dangerous.”
He also highlighted nonlethal alternatives, such as pepper or bear spray, as an important part of any security plan. His view, ultimately, is cautious and situational. “I’m not saying people should or shouldn’t own a gun,” he said. “Every community has to figure it out for itself.”
JUST ANOTHER TOOL
Rabbi Aharon agrees with much of that assessment and still reaches a different conclusion. He carries regularly. “In the current environment,” he explained, “a shliach who is capable, trained, and responsible should consider carrying as part of a broader security strategy.”
For him, firearms are not a standalone solution but one layer in a larger system that includes cameras, locks, procedures, and coordination. “It’s no different than having security cameras or reinforced doors,” he said. “It’s another tool.”
Rabbi Aharon, who began carrying after the Pittsburgh Synagogue attack in 2018, stressed that carrying demands serious preparation. He described extensive training that goes beyond basic range practice, focusing on movement, situational awareness, and decision-making under
stress. Equally important, he said, is mastery of useof-force law. “A gun is not symbolic,” he explained. “It’s there to be used in the worstcase scenario, and you need to understand exactly what responsibility that entails.” He also pointed to deterrence. When it becomes known that Jewish institutions are not soft targets, he argued, it can protect entire communities— not just those who are armed. “It completes the security net,” he said.
Without offering details, Rabbi Aharon noted that there have already been instances— intentionally kept out of the public eye—in which shluchim have used firearms to protect their communities. “There’s a reason you haven’t heard about them,” he said.
At the same time, he is clear that carrying is not for everyone. “Not every tool is for every person,” he said. “If someone isn’t prepared for the responsibility, that’s okay. This isn’t a mandate.”
Despite their different practices, Rabbi Zev and Rabbi Aharon agree on the fundamentals: firearms are not an identity, not a statement, and not a substitute for judgment.
Shluchim and shluchos speak often about bitachon in Hashem. None sees trust as a substitute for responsibility. For those on the front lines of Jewish life, the question of safety and security is no longer theoretical. It is practical, personal, and, increasingly, unavoidable.
By Tzemach Feller
THE WEIGHT OF OZEMPIC
What GLP-1s mean for frum people and who they're really for
As weight-loss GLP-1 medications like Ozempic and Wegovy reshape conversations about health, the frum community faces new questions in a food-centric life. Rifky Mittelman-Szanzer, MS, RD, CDN, CDCES, a dietitian with over a decade in Crown Heights, provides clinical and cultural insights. Experienced in gastrointestinal disorders, diabetes, and weight issues in all ages, she offers a grounded view of health beyond the scale.
What are your thoughts on the new GLP-1 medications?
First of all, GLP-1s are not new. They have been around for about 20 years, and they are an excellent drug for what they were created for, which is controlling blood sugar. One reason they are so popular is that they are only given once a week, making them easier to take than many alternatives. Only recently did doctors start realizing that a good side effect of the GLP-1 medications is that they also cause weight loss. Over the past five years, they have been approved for use as weight-loss medications.
We know that many or most chronic illnesses — heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes, kidney disease — usually are related to obesity. If a person’s obesity is causing them to be sick; if they have what’s called a comorbidity: something like hypertension, diabetes, heart disease, or kidney disease, then we have to treat the obesity as a disease, and the person should be taking medicine to help fix it. But that's not what is happening to most people. Most people aren't at this higher level of risk; they’re looking for an easy way to lose
weight, which is very concerning to dietitians.
So are you pro or against these medications?
As I mentioned, GLP-1 medications are very effective at causing weight loss, but they also have concerning short- and long-term side effects. The short-term side effects include nausea, constipation, bloating and gas. It may seem minor, but these side effects can be debilitating.
In the long term, when people lose weight very quickly, they are not only losing fat—they are also losing muscle mass, which can have negative long-term consequences. If a person is very sick, then we say, “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it; at least this way the person will live to be old and to experience the long-term side effects.” But if a person is healthy, why risk getting sick as they age because of low muscle mass?
So what are your concerns about it?
For dietitians, what is especially concerning is, what happens when this doesn’t work? Everyone thinks they will lose 60 pounds in 4 months, but the reality is that most people do not see such numbers. And many people can't sustain the weight loss. They go off the medication and often they will gain everything back, and then what? At that point, you don’t have too many options left. Will we say that everyone needs surgery? It seems to be a rabbit hole, and nobody wants to hear that part.
So do you not recommend it?
For some people, I will be the first one to say it is the right thing. As a dietitian, I have advised patients to take GLP-1. I’m not against it, but I'm against using it as a quick
fix. I would recommend GLP-1 medications for someone who has comorbidities. For example, if someone had morbid obesity and tried to lose weight naturally, and was not able to do so, and they also have high blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes, or other conditions — all of which are related to weight — that’s someone who the medication is created for.
I would not advise a GLP-1, for example, for someone who has borderline high cholesterol, and could take care of it through natural weight loss and creating healthy habits.
What should people be aware of regarding GLP-1 medications?
It is very new as used for weight loss, and as a result, we don’t really know what’s going to happen in the future. If a person is unwell, we aren’t as concerned about potential side effects when they’re older, because at least they'll make it to being older. Also, pancreatitis is a potential side effect, which can be very unpleasant — will that become more frequent? A lot of this
I HAVE A HARD TIME BELIEVING THAT FOR THE MAJORITY OF PEOPLE, GLP-1 MEDICATION IS THE RIGHT THING
is not yet known. To me, it’s mindblowing that people are hesitant about antibiotics and vaccinations, but they’re running to take GLP-1.
What are some of the challenges in our community surrounding living a healthy lifestyle?
The biggest struggle the frum community faces in weight loss, unlike the general population, is social pressure. Any event, whether it’s a birthday, a graduation, a shiur, Shabbos, or Yom Tov, generally comes with food. We are dealing with lavish, festive meals, not once or twice a year, but every week.
The frum community also has more availability in food than ever before, and more skill in food. More people are “foodies”; there are so many fancy restaurants in our communities. Most of my out-of-town shliach patients say that the hardest thing for weight management is visiting Crown Heights, where restaurants are plentiful and open late.
In every family, there are birthday parties, farbrengens, constant invitations: “come here, come there” — and always an abundance of food. It’s a more recent issue that seems to be getting more and more challenging.
The biggest challenge is maintaining social, religious, and physical health simultaneously.
What are some recommendations for healthy eating and habits?
The first thing to remember is that we no longer say, “Don’t do it; don’t go to a kiddush, don’t go to a shiur.”
In the past, the mindset was simply: “Don’t eat - so don’t go.” But that doesn’t work. Generally, the goal is to focus on health more than on weight, and social and emotional health is as important — or more important — than physical health.
Instead of drastic measures, we
recommend foundational skills you can apply where you are. You will be at an event with food — what can you do to make a meal healthier? Add vegetables, add water. We recommend portion control: when you know you can have one portion of protein and one of carbs, you can eat what’s around, choose what you’d like as your portion, add vegetables and water, and participate without feeling like you’re missing out - or losing control of yourself.
I also recommend that when facing an eating challenge, take a walk. Walking can reset the brain. Sometimes people feel like they’re spiraling, they’re losing control, but taking a walk can be a reset and help them feel more confident.
What should people keep in mind to avoid or do more of?
Try to avoid extremes, whether it is extreme poor choices or extreme good choices. It’s a red flag when someone says, “Once I have a piece of cake, I can’t stop.” It’s a red flag when there are people who won’t touch a piece of pasta.
These days we are pushing longterm changes and adding achievable positive changes. If the only thing you can do is to add one vegetable to your daily diet — ok, add one vegetable. We can’t compare one person to another, and what works and is achievable for one person may not be achievable for another. A good habit is to make one positive change every day; one thing that will make you feel like you’re taking care of your body.
What should people’s weight loss goals be?
I think weight loss is a very frustrating journey - a very long one. But when it’s done properly, it needs to be a long journey. It’s supposed to take a while; you’re not supposed to lose all the weight in six months. You don’t have to turn over your life.
You can take on small, achievable changes and build on those.
If we take away the fear and the pressure surrounding weight loss in our community, fewer people would feel the need to take medication to lose weight; it would be more appealing to lose weight in a natural way.
The average person is not supposed to be thin, and to push everyone to be thin is very concerning and not achievable. Our children are listening, and for teens to hear that there’s pressure to be thin, there is no way that will end well. There’s already an uptick in anxiety and other mental health disorders as it is; this will only exacerbate that. Our goal shouldn’t be a number on the scale — it should be health, and a lot of people are healthy when they’re overweight.
Health is not just physical; it includes social and emotional health. If a person has depression and anxiety, that needs attention. Beyond that, to determine physical health, lab work can tell us a lot, but even that doesn’t tell the whole story; there are genetic and personal factors that go into determining whether a person is healthy. It’s difficult for a person to look at themselves and know whether they’re healthy. That is why people do better when speaking with a dietitian, who takes into account their lifestyle and whether they are eating the right amount for them.
A healthy person is healthy not just physically, but in many areas. Rifky Mittelman-Szanzer MS, RD, CDN, CDCES can be reached at Rifky@completenutritionny.com or 929.260.1661.
The Rebbe Preparing to Place the Torah on
By Mendel Cohen
Photos: JEM/The Living Archive
A Day Uniquely Connected to Geulah
Chof Beis Shevat 5752 - The fourth yahrtzeit of the Rebbetzin obm
Thousands of local men and women, including visiting shluchos, gathered at 770 to be with the Rebbe as he marked the fourth yahrtzeit of the Rebbetzin. Unbeknownst to all, it would be the last time they would see the Rebbe leading the davening before his stroke several weeks later. The following pages present small glimpses from that unforgettable day, along with vivid descriptions drawn from diaries written by chassidim who experienced it.
A Resounding Maariv
The Rebbe entered the shul for Maariv at 7:05 to an extremely packed room of chassidimreminiscent of Tishrei - singing “Shuva” with intensity. The Rebbe stopped at the chazan’s shtender at the front of the shul, opened his siddur, and led the davening. In accordance with the Rebbe’s specific request from two weeks earlier, the crowd davened aloud, despite their desire to hear the Rebbe’s own voice.
Living up to Her Name
Following Maariv, the Rebbe ascended the stage and delivered a brief ten-minute sicha. Spoken in a serious tone, the sicha focused on the Rebbetzin and her fourth yahrtzeit, which the Rebbe emphasized marked an elevation for her neshamah. The Rebbe also called upon those named Chaya Mushka, after the Rebbetzin, to serve as living examples to those around them.
Kuntresim Through the Night
The Rebbe then proceeded to distribute a special kuntres for Chof Beis Shevat, containing sichos and letters on the role of Jewish women in the generation of Geulah. Printed in pink and wrapped together with a five-dollar bill and a piece of lekach, the kuntresim were distributed over five hours, until 12:30 a.m., with an estimated 11,000 (!) copies given out.
An Unusual Shachris
The Rebbe entered the shul for Shacharis at 10:05 to the singing of “Shuva”. In an unprecedented moment, the Rebbe held the tzitzis in his right hand for Shema and did not cover his eyes, leaving many chassidim awestruck.
Receiving an Aliyah
At the words Gadlu, which the chazan recites while holding the Torah, the Rebbe - Sefer Torah in hand - turned to his right, making nearly a full circle before proceeding slowly to the bima with the Torah. After receiving his customary third aliyah, the Rebbe recited Kaddish from the siddur, slowly and calmly.
Mincha Following the Ohel
After spending several hours at the Ohel, the Rebbe returned to 770 at 6:35 p.m. and entered the shul to daven Mincha a few minutes later. The Rebbe led chazaras ha’shatz louder and in a more tuneful melody than usual. Maariv then followed, and after it concluded, the Rebbe suddenly motioned that he wished to deliver a sicha.
Powerful Dates
In an 18-minute sicha, the Rebbe focused on the unique date of Chof Beis Shevat and its link to 11, a number associated with the highest revelations in the time of Moshiach - Chof Beis (22) being double eleven, and Shevat, the eleventh month. The Rebbe also elaborated on the significance of the Rebbetzin’s two names, Chaya and Mushka.
Double Speed to the Geulah
After the sicha, the Rebbe approached the dollars table and announced that he would distribute two dollars - to hasten the Geulah. The distribution, which lasted 25 minutes, was lively, with the Rebbe encouraging the singing of “Napoleon’s March” and “Nyet Nyet”, uplifting the Chassidim before they sat down for a Siyum HaRambam and farbrengen to mark the Rebbetzin’s fourth yahrtzeit.
Chinuch atters
Presented by Sarah Pinson and the Menachem Education Foundation (MEF)
Ask the Mechaneches
How should I handle my child’s classmate whose entertainment at home doesn’t align with my values?
In this upside down world that we live in, I often remind myself that just because “everyone is doing it,” doesn’t mean we have to do it. We are Yidden and Chassidim, and we are different. Viniflinu –Hashem separated us from the rest of the world, and we have to stand strong and be proud of who we are. I remind myself that my children gain from seeing the strength I have in what I believe in, even if they fight me for it during their younger years. Eventually, they’re going to say thank you—thank you for being strong and being true to your values.
That being said, I would never tell my child to not be friends with someone who doesn’t hold to our values, as in the case of your question. I would just explain that we do things differently in our home. I had a situation where my daughter was once invited for Shabbos by a very nice family who has different standards. I called the mother and told her that I am so glad our kids are friends, and then I added that we don’t let our kids watch movies or television, and asked if that was ok with her. Not only was she not
upset about it, she expressed her appreciation for being upfront and not beating around the bush. When my kids tell me that they must have what everyone else has, or do what everyone else is doing, I tell them that there is no “must.” If something aligns with our standards and it is within reason, then it’s totally ok, otherwise, it’s not the right thing for our family. There are differences between every family and home, and it is totally ok to be different. This perspective gives my children the ability to be strong and proud of who they are when these kinds of nisyonos come up.
I try to make sure not to create a negative attitude around it. Right now, my kids go on a bus to school with other kids who watch things on their iPads. If my daughter tells me that she saw something on her friend’s iPad, there’s nothing I can really do about it, and I definitely don’t reprimand her. We live in a world where our kids are exposed to things, but they also need to know that these are things that don’t belong in their home, and that’s a healthy boundary.
Answer by Mrs. Hinda Pinson Shlucha in South Bay, CA and 7th Grade Limudei Kodesh Teacher, Bais Rebbe, Los Angeles, CA
Chinuch Happenings
AI Workshop for Educators
The Menachem Education Foundation together with the Merkos Chinuch Office are teaching educators how to utilize AI tools to increase engagement and bring ease to lesson planning. The first session hosted Rabbi Mendel Blau, Rosh Moisad of Oholei Torah on Torah’s approach to new technology, and Rabbi Shneur Zalman Munitz, teacher at Cheder Menachem in Kingston, PA on how teachers can use AI to their advantage. Their main focus was to ensure that educators know how to use AI responsibly, in a way that is aligned with Chassidishe Chinuch.
The second session will feature Rabbi Shmuly Gniwisch of Torah Day School in Houston, TX on advanced AI tools for the classroom.
Women Principals of Crown Heights Uplifted at Meaningful Event
On Chof Beis Teves, 25 Crown Heights women principals gathered at the home of Morah Shana Tiechtel for an evening of inspiration and perspective in honor of the yartzeit of her daughter, and as part of the growing Agudas Menahalos program through MEF. Rabbi Mendy Blau, head of Oholei Torah, opened with an inspiring address about the Chinuch of Shlichus in Crown Heights. Mrs. Miriam Swerdlov MC’ed the evening, and four principals spoke about solutions to challenges of Chinuch Shlichus: Mrs. Esther Wilhelm, Bais Rivkah; Mrs. Dena Gorkin, Bnos Chomesh; Mrs. Leah Jacobson, Bais Rivkah; and Mrs. Hadassah Werner from Bnos Menachem. Principals sang niggunim together and enjoyed live musical accompaniment. The powerful achdus of principals gathered from across six different schools was palpable.
Educators As First Responders in Mental Health Crisis
Due to overwhelming interest in knowing how to respond to the mental health needs of students and children, MEF is running a fifth and sixth cohort of the Youth Mental Health First Aid Course, for mechanchos, mothers and mashpios. This
Updated Chabad High School Guide Available from MEF
Back by popular demand, MEF has updated the Chabad Girls High School Guide, a helpful resource for parents of 8th-grade girls. The guide shares information on 24 Chabad high schools across North America, and includes the name of the principals, contact info, tuition, class size, scholarship availability, boarding and dorm options, criteria for acceptance, academic level, extracurricular information and more.
evidence based certification course, presented by Gittel Francis, LCSW, teaches tools to notice warning signs of mental health challenges and crises, how to respond with confidence and care, and when to refer to additional support.
MEF also held a panel on choosing the right high school with Mrs. Gitty Bronstein, Mrs. Rishe Majesky, Mrs. Rivkie Spalter and Morah Shana Tiechtel. This insightful discussion is now available on the Everything Chinuch podcast, together with other Chinuch content for parents to enjoy. In addition, MEF’s Everything Chinuch podcast features a recording of last year’s panel discussion which similarly guided parents on how to help their daughters make the right choice.
Find out about more parent webinars, resources, and podcast drops by following MEF on Whatsapp, Instagram and by visiting Mymef. org
The Menachem Education Foundation's annual campaign that raises money to build for the education of our children, will be taking place on 4-5 Kislev/November 24-25, 2025.
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Your partnership helps MEF bring high quality curricula, trained teachers, and social-emotional learning to every classroom.
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The Rebbe’s Words
"WORDS
THAT COME FROM THE HEART ENTER THE HEART"
In addition to setting a living example through one’s personal conduct, an educator must speak to the student with words that come from the heart. When words come from the heart, they enter the heart and accomplish their effect…"
High School Guide
Meet the Teacher
Rabbi Yossi Goodman
Menahel and educator at Bais Menachem in Wilkes Barre, PA
Tell us about your Chinuch Shlichus:
I’m a Mechanech at Bais Menachem in the Poconos (formerly in Wilkes Barre, PA), which is an alternative-style Yeshiva. There are a wide range of classes that are elective-based, with different tracks, including JLI discussion-based classes, some traditional classes, and chavrusah-style learning. The roles that the staff play are also multifaceted.
I’ve been on Shlichus here for 12 years, and I now serve as the principal. A lot of my day involves speaking with parents, dealing with Shluchim and other members of Hanhalah and engaging with Bachurim. I also farbreng and teach a few classes each day in both Nigleh and Chassidus.
In general, we treat our work as a Shlichus. We have the Bachurim over every single Friday
night, Shabbos day, and Yomim Tovim. There is always a mix of current students, alumni, parents and siblings at our home. So many of these kids feel like it’s their house. It’s way beyond the classroom. We’re involved in every detail of their lives and their families. They’re in my house during the week, talking and farbrenging. It’s the model of the Yeshiva.
What are you currently teaching?
For morning Chassidus, I have been teaching Tanya for the past few years, but I switch it up as I please. For Nigleh, I teach Shulchan Aruch with an emphasis on learning how to learn. I want the Bachurim to learn how to study something independently from a sefer.
How do you engage your students in learning?
My classes are more discussion-based and somewhat inter-
active. In my Chassidus classes, I give over a lot of stories and meshalim. I try to be practical and down to earth so the guys can relate to what I am saying. What inspired you to go into Chinuch?
I had many experiences in Chinuch as a Bachur, working with both frum and not frum kids. During my time learning in 770, I spent my evenings as a Shliach in Oholei Torah Mesivta. I hit it off with a lot of guys, and they felt comfortable opening up to me about their struggles. This really set me on the path that I eventually took into Chinuch. How do you stay motivated?
Baruch Hashem, motivation is not something I struggle with. My personality is to be easily and constantly inspired, so it comes naturally. Also, in our Yeshiva, there is a certain sense of urgency that keeps you on edge. It’s not a joke when I say lives are
at stake.
What are you passionate about?
The Rebbe. Ahavas Yisroel. Jews. Teens. Helping people who are going through a hard time, and who feel misunderstood and not recognized. You find so much beauty there, and my heart is pulled towards that.
What is the most challenging aspect of your work?
The hardest part is that it’s not one of those jobs that you can forget about when you go home. There are always pressing needs. First as Bachurim, then to Shidduchim, marriage and raising families. We stay in touch with our graduates and guide them through many of life’s challenges.
What do you find most rewarding?
When a student doesn’t just internalize it for themselves, but they run with it and give it
over to the next person. Seeing them under the chuppah is also a pretty big nachas.
Share your favorite story of nachas.
Baruch Hashem, we get a lot of “if not for you I wouldn’t be here” stories, but here’s a touching one I’d like to share.
We had a Bachur who lost his Tefillin. At that point, he wasn’t too sensitive to putting on Tefillin every day, and he misplaced them. His parents struggled a lot financially and he didn’t have the heart to tell them. Another Bachur got wind of what happened, and he took initiative. He collected money from the other Bachurim who generously contributed. On the Bachur’s birthday, his friend presented him with a brand new pair of Tefillin.
What is a message you’d like to share?
People often say that Chinuch is real Shlichus, but it sounds like they’re saying that to fight those who say it’s not. I want to change the narrative and say that people have to really treat Chinuch like a Shlichus in all aspects. That students should come to your house for Shabbos, and after hours, you should fundraise and be involved in the Bachurim’s families. Look at it like a Shlichus and live in that way. Your house is a Chabad house for them, if it is able to work for you. You have to view it as an all-in lifestyle, and do whatever is necessary.
My message to the community is that when a parent reaches out to a Mechanech and asks if there is anything they should know about their child, it’s hugely impactful. The Mechanchim deal with the Bachurim all day, and these conversations help bridge the gap between the parents and the Yeshivah.
Teaching Tip
by Mushkie Lipsker @evergrowingeducator
When you ask students a question and ask them to raise their hand, how many students raise their hands? Now, how many students do you get to call on? Usually one or two. How can we engage more students than the ones we are calling on? Whiteboards.
Whiteboards are a highly effective classroom tool because there are many ways to use them throughout a lesson, and each student has their own. Because every student can write at the same time, whiteboards make it easy to hear from everyone, not just the few who usually raise their hands.
Whiteboards also remove the fear of getting something wrong. Since the work is erasable, students feel more comfortable
taking risks and trying again. This makes whiteboards especially effective for practice, quick checks for understanding, and exit tickets. Teachers can instantly see what students understand and adjust instruction in real time.
There are many types of whiteboards, each with different benefits depending on how they are used. Some classrooms use framed boards that stay at desks, while others prefer handheld paddle-style boards that are easy to lift and show. There are round ones which are great for drawing puppets and rectangular ones which are great for writing longer answers. Lined whiteboards are great for younger students, who need more direction with writing, and plain white ones work better for older students, giving them more flexibility. Teachers can choose whether students keep their own boards, or whether the teacher stores and distributes them as needed.
While many whiteboards come with erasers, many times those erasers stop working as effectively after a few uses. Single socks are a simple and effective option. Students enjoy bringing in lone socks from home, and they work well without the issue of traditional erasers going missing or not working anymore.
Here are three ways to use
whiteboards! (& scan the QR code for the full list of 20 ideas!)
Puppet Show!
Turn your whiteboard into puppets by having students draw faces onto the circles. When reading a story or telling over Parsha, have students hold up the character that is speaking then.
Agree / Disagree
Give a statement. Students write Agree or Disagree on each side of the board and they hold up the side that represents what they think. Pro tip: Have them use two different colors. It’ll be easier for you to scan the room. For older students, have them jot down 3-5 words explaining why they agree or disagree.
True or False Flash
Students write T on one side of their board and F on the other. Call out a statement. and students hold up their whiteboards on your cue. This works for vocabulary, translations, and more.
For more educational tidbits and resources, visit evergrowingeducator.com or follow @evergrowingeducator on Instagram.
For the full list of 20 ideas visit
Olives: NINETY
Grapes: the last shadow
Fig: Fig 1 and 3 are attached to the second tree
Wheat: 1 and 4
Barley: To Buy Things
Pom: Counting from bottom left corner, 3 from the left, one up
Dates: 5 differences (bottom of bowl, dots on bowl, date, rim around the gray, glare on bowl)
HISTORY’S HEROES
CRAFT. PAINT. BAKE. EXPERIMENT.
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2. THE NUGGET
CONTEST
WIN 2 FREE MUSEUM TICKETS
Finish the weekly project, snap a pic, and email us at info@jcm.museum for a chance to win 2 tickets to the Jewish Children’s Museum. Let’s get creating!
During his time living in Gerar, Yitzchak re-dug 3 wells that were dug in his father’s days and had been filled with earth by the Pelishtim. He had to toil as he dug, but with enough effort, he revealed the water already there from deep underground. A similar concept applies to the 3 Batei Mikdash. The Jewish people had to work hard to build the 1st and 2nd Batei Hamikdash, but as a result of their effort, Hashem’s presence was revealed there. As for the 3rd Bais Hamikdash, it already exists and is waiting for us on high. We just need to put in a little more work so that it can come down and be revealed.
4. FUN FACT
Yitzchak was born on the 1st day of Pesach and was the first Jewish boy to get a Bris Mila as a baby of 8 days old.
1. LIFE STORY SNIPPET
Yitzchak Avinu, the second of the Avos, is most known for the Akeida – being bound on the Mizbeach as a Korban to Hashem. Although he was not offered up as a Korban in actuality, he nevertheless retained the holy status of a Korban and therefore never left Eretz Yisrael, the Holy Land. He and Rivkah, his wife, remained childless for 20 years, but were finally blessed with twins – Yaakov and Eisav.
3. BRINGING IT DOWN
The same idea applies to you too. You have a Neshama, you have intrinsic goodness, which like the water deep underground, already exists. But sometimes the Yetzer Hara hides and covers this goodness. It’s your job to be a well-digger like Yitzchak and reveal the good Middos that you already have hiding within. For example, even if your instinct is to complain, you can dig within and find that piece of your Neshama that feels grateful for what you have.
5. QUESTION TO CONSIDER
Can you identify a positive Middah that you can work on, to reveal within yourself?
Begin by cutting the label off of the water bottle, then cut the water bottle ¼ of the way from the top, making sure to keep it as even as possible.
Poke a hole on each side of your 1oz cup.
On each side of the water bottle cut out a small insert about ½-inch-deep and ¼ of an inch in width.
Make a handle by tying a piece of string (about 5 inches in length) to each side of your cup. Make sure the knots are secure.
Slip the bobbin through the stick and secure it in the middle using two balls of clay. Place it into the inserts on the bottle. Roll up the bobbin using the two ends of the stick and fill your bottle with water about ⅓ of the way.
SCIENCE UNCOVERED
Using the scissors, cut a wooden craft stick to about 6 inches in length, and place it in the insert.
Cut another piece of ribbon, and attach it to the bobbin using a piece of tape.
And there you have it! Your very own miniature well!
The dowel works like a pulley or handle found in real wells, which helps lift water more easily. Turning the dowel, causes the ribbon to wrap or unwrap around the bobbin. The bucket is lowered into and lifted from the water, reducing the effort that would otherwise be needed to retrieve water.
SUPPLIES LIST
-Empty Water Bottle
-Wooden Dowel (about 6 inches in length)
-Ribbon (about 1.5 feet in length)
-Bobbin
-Clay
-Water
-Scissors/Hole puncher
-1 oz. Container
By Sruly Meyer
KosherSpread
Four Quick & Simple Comfort Dinner Recipes
COMFORT FOODclassics
Sruly Meyer runs a marketing agency in Hollywood, Florida. He is also a home cook, recipe developer, and online influencer. He is passionate about food, travel, and Jewish parenthood.
@srulycooks
Sticky Garlic Chicken Cutlets
Ingredients:
• Thin chicken cutlets
• Salt, pepper
• Garlic powder
• 3 cloves garlic, minced
• 2 tbsp honey or brown sugar
• 1 tbsp soy sauce
• Olive oil
Instructions:
1. Season chicken on both sides with salt, pepper, and garlic powder.
2. Heat olive oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Sear cutlets for about 3 to 4 minutes per side until golden and cooked through. Remove and set aside.
3. Lower heat to medium and add minced garlic, honey or brown sugar, and soy sauce to the pan. Stir and simmer for 1 to 2 minutes until slightly thickened and glossy.
4. Return chicken to the pan and toss to coat evenly in the sauce. Cook another 1 to 2 minutes to let everything come together. Always let chicken sit and cool before serving!
Super Simple Baked Ziti
Ingredients:
• 1 box ziti
• 2 cups marinara
• 1 cup heavy cream or non-dairy cream
• 2 cups shredded mozzarella
• Olive oil, salt
Instructions:
1. Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil and cook the ziti just until al dente, about 1 to 2 minutes less than package directions. Drain well and drizzle lightly with olive oil.
2. In a large bowl, mix the marinara, cream, and cooked pasta until evenly coated.
3. Transfer to a greased baking dish and spread evenly. Top generously with shredded mozzarella.
4. Bake at 375°F for about 25 minutes, uncovered, until the cheese is fully melted, bubbly, and lightly golden on top. Let rest for 5 minutes before serving so it sets up nicely.
Easy Baked Mac & Cheese
Ingredients:
• Elbow pasta
• 3 tbsp butter
• 3 tbsp flour
• 2 cups milk
• 2 cups shredded cheddar or mozzarella
• Salt
Instructions:
1. Preheat oven to 375°F and grease a baking dish.
2. Cook pasta in salted water until just al dente, then drain. In a saucepan over medium heat, melt butter, then whisk in flour and cook for about 1 minute until smooth and lightly golden.
3. Slowly whisk in milk and cook, stirring constantly, until thickened, about 3 to 5 minutes. Season lightly with salt.
4. Stir in cheese until melted and smooth, then fold in cooked pasta.
5. Transfer to a baking dish and bake uncovered for about 20 minutes, until hot and lightly golden on top. Let sit a few minutes before serving.
Honey Dijon Baked Salmon
Ingredients:
• Salmon fillets
• 2 tbsp Dijon mustard
• 2 tbsp honey
• Olive oil
• Salt, pepper
Instructions:
1. Preheat oven to 375°F and line a baking sheet with parchment or foil.
2. In a small bowl, whisk Dijon, honey, olive oil, salt, and pepper until smooth.
3. Place salmon skin-side down and spread the sauce evenly over the top.
4. Bake for 15 to 18 minutes, depending on thickness, until the salmon flakes easily with a fork and looks opaque. For extra color, broil for the last 1 to 2 minutes if desired.
By Asharon Baltazar
One Out of a Thou$and
A
story heard by two Shluchim stranded in Toronto
The Rebbe Rzyatz, Rabbi Yosef Yitzchak Schneersohn, arrived in the United States worn down in body, unbroken in spirit. By a chain of narrow miraculous escapes, he had survived both Communist persecution and the genocidal Nazi net closing in around Europe. Many assumed that America would now offer him what history had not: rest.
The Rebbe Rayatz did not come to rest.
Almost at once, he began to build. Torah centers. Yeshivos. Small defiant footholds of Jewish life across a continent that scarcely knew how fragile such things could be. “America is not different,” he said, and sent emissaries from city to city. It was the quiet beginning of a movement that, under his successor, would one day span the globe.
The Rebbe Rayatz began with no money, no safety, no assurances.
Still, he built. One such effort took hold in Toronto, Ontario. When a gathering was called to support the fledgling Jewish education there, the Rebbe sent two emissaries to represent him—among them his son-in-law, Rabbi Shmaryahu Gurary (“Rashag”).
They set out into a brutal snowstorm. The journey would take nearly twenty hours, but they went with resolve. Their presence proved decisive, and the conference succeeded beyond expectation.
The return, however, was impossible. The storm had closed roads and rail alike, cutting Toronto off from the rest of the world. With no alternative, they remained in their hotel, waiting for the weather to relent.
News of their extended stay spread quickly. Jews from across the city came to meet the Rebbe’s representatives. Among them was
a senior rabbi, one of Toronto’s leading halachic authorities. His visit surprised the two men.
“To what do we owe this honor?” they asked.
“You are the Rebbe’s emissaries,” he replied.
They nodded.
“Nu,” he said, “‘a person’s agent is as the person himself,’ and that’s good enough for me. And since I am here, let me tell you how I first encountered the Rebbe.
“In my synagogue, I have a respected congregant named Reuven. One Shabbos, Reuven was called to the Torah for an aliyah. He rose, took a step toward the bimah, and stopped, swaying unsteadily. A second later, he crumpled to the floor in full view of the congregation. The service dissolved into confused shouts. An ambulance arrived, and Reuven was rushed to the hospital.
“That night, after Shabbos, I went to see him. The family met me in silence and worry. ‘He’s suffered sudden paralysis,’ they explained. ‘His speech is affected. The doctors say there is nothing to be done.’
“Days passed, and there was no improvement. I pleaded with the hospital staff to speak with the patient. They refused and wouldn’t budge. But from inside his room, Reuven heard my voice and requested that I be let in.
“It was hard to hear anything Reuven had to say. I leaned close. ‘Please,’ Reuven whispered, ‘write to the Lubavitcher Rebbe, who has just come to America. Ask him to bless me to recover.’
“I wrote that night and sent the letter to Brooklyn by express post.
“The Rebbe’s response swiftly appeared in my mailbox. He instructed that Reuven be told: a yeshiva was being built in
Montreal. He should contribute $1,000 toward its construction. A thousand, the Rebbe explained, is not the same as a hundred. From a thousand, a different kind of advocate is formed. He cited the verse from Iyov: ‘If there is an angel over him, an intercessor, one out of a thousand.’
“‘If he does this,’ the Rebbe wrote, ‘he will recover and walk.’
“The Rebbe’s absolute terms unsettled the family. ‘A donation is going to make him feel better?’ Reuven’s brother-in-law asked.
“But Reuven paid no attention to the biting complaints. He asked his son to send the money immediately; the son traveled to Montreal and delivered the contribution.
“A few days later, the head physician entered Reuven’s room. He examined him, then paused, and examined him again, more carefully this time.
“When he stepped outside, he turned to the family and demanded, ‘Who authorized you to bring in another doctor?’
“‘We didn’t,’ the family said. ‘No one else has treated him.’
“The physician stood silent for a moment. Then he shook his head.
‘Then I have no explanation,’ he said. ‘His improvement is extraordinary. Within days, he should be discharged.’
“And so it was. At first, Reuven walked with crutches. Weeks later, he danced unassisted at his son’s wedding, the same one who had carried the donation to the yeshiva.”
The rabbi finished his story and looked at the stranded emissaries.
“Now you understand why I came,” he said. “I have seen with my own eyes who the Rebbe is. How could I not honor his messengers?”
By Mordechai Schmutter
A Walk in the Dark
How to survive a post-Shabbos meal outing on a Friday night
There comes a time in every marriage when your wife is going to want to go walking, and you’re going to want to go to sleep. And that time is Friday night. What are you gonna do, right?
No, literally. What are you actually going to do?
On the surface, this doesn’t really sound like a conflict of interest. If she wants to walk, let her walk. You’re not the boss of her! And if you want to sleep, you can sleep.
Because for some reason, as soon as the seudah is over on Friday nights – and sometimes during the seudah if it takes long enough – you’re going to crash. In fact, sometimes mayim acharonim is really just a netillas yadayim so you can bentch. You just want to get under a warm blanket and fall asleep with a sefer on your lap until your wife wakes you up to remind you to go to bed. You don’t want to walk out in the cold and freeze your chin off in a Shabbos coat. Who designed these Shabbos coats? “Yeah, let’s have a big open neckline so everyone can see his belt buckle!”
On the other hand, if you care about your wife at all, you will at least be a little uncomfortable about letting her walk the streets alone at night. As long as she doesn’t expect too much in the way of intellectual conversation. You’ll be there physically, but mentally you’ll be asleep. The streets on Friday nights are littered with wives dragging around half-asleep husbands who are hoping they don’t run into anyone they have to talk to. I literally do not have enough brainpower to adapt to random people I run into and make small talk with them, especially considering the number of people who expect me to be funny every time they see me. I barely have enough change in the meter to talk to my wife.
“Did you know that Mordechai Schmutter’s not so funny in person? I met him once on a Friday night with his wife. He might have been sleepwalking.”
And then your wife says, “See? They’re out walking.”
That’s the kind of conversation she wants to have with you.
She also apparently wants to accidentally turn on motionsensitive lights all over town.
The truth is that it’s entirely possible that she specifically wants to spend time with you, because you’re working the rest of the week. You don’t have time to go walk around town and turn on random motion lights. Plus she already fell asleep on the couch with a magazine while you were in shul, so she’s wide awake.
Not that you’ll be any good in a dangerous situation either. She’s there to protect you. It was her idea to be out there. This is what you’re going to explain to the muggers.
YOU: “We don’t have anything on us.”
MUGGER: “How is that possible?”
Great. I don’t have the energy to teach this guy about Shabbos.
YOU: “Okay, once upon a time –before time was created, actually –the world was a formless void...”
MUGGER: “What? I don’t have time for stories, man. I’m going.”
YOU: “Can you go that way? I need to see if there are lights.”
WIFE: “You forgot to ask if his mother was Jewish.”
YOU: “I’m not awake! I don’t know why you couldn’t talk.”
Sure, I suppose there are some wives who are content to let their husbands sit in their living room after the meal and instead have deep, meaningful conversations with them about whether they’re asleep.
“You were asleep just now.”
“No, I was resting my eyes.”
“You were snoring.”
“I was breathing.”
“If you don’t know that you were snoring, you were obviously asleep.”
“I don’t know what you’re saying.”
“That’s because you’re aslee— Hello?... Great.”
Maybe the walk is to make sure you’re awake through the conversation. Or at least that you
won’t be snoring over it.
But for the rest of us, the question isn’t whether to walk with her. The question is how to convince her not to want to walk. Especially when she comes back at you with an argument about how healthy it is to walk after a big meal. She’s doing this for you. Sure, she can ask one of the kids to come along, but she wants you to be healthy, not them. Though I do want to point out that it’s mostly non-Jewish scientists who say that it’s healthy, yet on their holidays, you don’t exactly see them walking in pairs after their seudos.
So one option here is to specifically have Shabbos guests. Particularly ones with little kids. Your wife isn’t going to pick up after the seudah and leave your guests sitting around in the living room. And most guests, at least in our experience, don’t really want to go for Friday night walks. They did not go away for Shabbos so they could do unexpected exercise.
But what if it’s too late to invite Shabbos guests?
You might think, “What’s the big deal? We can invite guests just for the
seudah!”
Nice try. Then you’re walking them home.
One way to get out of a long walk, at least, is to suggest a really close walking destination – a neighbor that you know that your wife can talk to for a reasonably long stretch of time until she feels like your walk has been long enough. And in the meantime, you can sit on their couch and fall asleep next to the husband (“Do you guys have a second Shemos?”), secure in the knowledge that no one can take a picture of this, and that no one will ever know for sure who the snores are coming from. If you fall asleep on your own couch after the seudah, you’re inconsiderate, but if you fall asleep on someone else’s couch, your wife will thank you for coming out with her.
But realistically, your best chance at avoiding a walk and also avoiding an argument about it is if it happens to be raining outside, baruch Hashem. This is why Chazal say that rain on Friday nights is a bracha. Chazal knew. They were married.
