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Now you try it 2
Write your own paragraph about how Bannister uses punctuation and different sentence lengths in the extract to change the pace or suggest how he is feeling. Comment on exclamation marks and/or ellipses. Use a similar format to the example paragraph above.
In this extract, Richard Branson explains how he started out in business.
Glossary ellipses: three dots to indicate a pause or an action that is unfinished
My very first business enterprises, or moneymaking schemes, were not a success, but I learned from them. One Easter holiday, when I was about nine years old and home from prep school, I came up with a great plan. I would grow Christmas trees. Everyone wanted a Christmas tree, so it seemed logical to conclude that quite literally Christmas trees were a cash crop – and what’s more, they just grew themselves. Pound signs danced in my eyes. I found out where to get seedlings and sent away for them. As soon as they arrived, I asked my best friend, Nik Powell, to help me plant some 400 seedlings in our field at home. […] All we had to do was wait for the seedlings to turn into Christmas trees in eighteen months, sell them and count the money. Even at an early age I planned long term. […] Sadly, rabbits ate all the seedlings. Screw It, Let’s Do It by Richard Branson
3
How has Richard Branson tried to interest the reader in his first business idea? Use quotations and consider
Glossary
• what words, phrases and metaphors he uses to make his ideas sound exciting
metaphors: direct comparisons that describe one thing in terms of another
• what details he gives that show the relevance of this event to his later life as a famous, successful businessman.
Check your progress
Apply your skills 4
Some progress
Imagine a celebrity is writing his or her autobiography and has asked you for advice in describing a key moment of his/her life. Use the two extracts to compile five top tips for making the incident sounds interesting to a reader. For example:
Include plenty of detail, as this makes the situation seem realistic and helps the reader to imagine he/she is there.
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I can select and comment on short, relevant and meaningful quotations.
Good progress
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I can select short, relevant and meaningful quotations and discuss their meaning in detail.
Excellent progress
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I can use relevant one-word and longer quotations, and analyse their meaning, to securely back up my points.
Make relevant points with apt quotations
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24/01/2014 11:20