FALL FASHION TRENDS
Collette's Charming Man
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Collette | Fall 2011
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Collette | Fall 2011
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Collette | Fall 2011
COLLETTE Barry Moore Publisher
Editor’s Letter Heather Strickland
T T E L L O C
fa ll 20 11
Babette Cubitt General Manager Heather Strickland Feature Editor and Contributions
It’s time that Lowcountry women of all walks have something smart to read. That’s the goal of Collette.
CONTRIBUTORS Jackie Boyd Lynne Riding Ansley Crumpton Amy Jo Gengler Missy Hardee Becky Dingle PRODUCTION Ashley Rohde Art & Creative Director Jeanne Mitchum Photographer Michelle Hazel Photographer / Graphic Artist Mary Alice Lynch Graphic Artist Katrena McCall Production Manager ADVERTISING Tamara Hiott Myiah Blakeney Louise Lyons Rick Tobin Collette, a magazine for sassy, smart Southern women of the Lowcountry, is published quarterly by The Press and Standard. The design, editorial, and photo content in Collette is copyrighted by Walterboro Newspapers, Inc. and may not be copied, scanned or reproduced in any manner, including publisher-designed advertisements, without written consent from the publisher. We reserve the right to refuse any advertisement or content we deem inappropriate for publication. Letters to the editor are welcome, and may be edited due to space limitations. Contributors are welcome and may be submitted to firstname.lastname@example.org; please include your name, address and daytime phone number. You will be contacted if we decide to publish your submission. Contact Us The Press and Standard | 1025 Bells Hwy | Walterboro, SC 29488 Phone 843.549-2586 | Fax 843-549-2446 email@example.com
Collette | Fall 2011
Poi nwpeu mr p s
She is the voice of working women, single women, stay-at-home mothers and experts who know who we are. Her words are coming from everyday women who know what it’s like to be – you. This magazine is meant to give us – the movers and shakers of the Lowcountry – a sassy and smart voice in our growing world. We want Collette to be your voice. Essentially, let us give you tips to have the greatest seasonal dinner party, and then let us give you topics to talk about while you are there! This magazine should be in your hands for an easy read-through at the salon, and empower you with the latest health trends, book reviews, controversial columns and edgy fashion tips. We want Collette to be a reflection of your world. This means we need to hear from you! Interact with us on Collette’s Facebook page facebook.com/ColletteMagazine. Share with us your ideas, your photographs, your suggestions. You can find Collette in racks around the Lowcountry. Contact us to offer content ideas, advertising selections and to add to our rack location sites. The Lowcountry is a vibrant, sexy and colorful place to live. And it’s a reflection of the women who make it this way. So let’s let Collette be a big part of who we are and where we are going.
POWER IN PUMPS
Collette Fall 2011
FOOD FOR THE SOUL
COLOR ME BOLD
Collette | Fall 2011
What’s Inside Fall 2011
5 BOLD TIPS FOR THE FALL FACE HOW TO: THE SMOKEY EYE
SERVING UP WHAT WOMEN WANT
WISDOM & WISECRACKS ADVICE FROM WOMEN, FOR WOMEN
COLLETTE'S CLOSET HOT FASHIONS FOR FALL
MELTDOWN ON AISLE 3 TANTRUM TIPS FOR MOMMIES
SPANISH WINES WE LOVE
LIVING WITH BREAST CANCER STORIES FROM A SURVIVOR
STICKING IT TO OUR PROBLEMS HOW ACUPUNCTURE CAN HELP
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ALPHA MALES: A DYING BREED?
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meet our cover girl
MEGAN DOOLEY COOK Megan is a former 1st runner up for Miss South Carolina USA. She is the 2006 graduate of the University of South Carolina with a B.A. in Public Relations from the School of Journalism and Mass Communications. Megan is married to Matt Cook, who was born and raised in Yemassee, SC. Collette | Fall 2011
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COLORFUL SMOKEY EYE The Smokey Eye: a classic go-to look. But this fall, ditch the standard black & brown and add pop of color!
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Collette | Fall 2011
HOW TO: the smokey eye
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Prep the lid. The key to keeping eyeshadow from melting into your eyelid crease as the day goes on is to kept eyelids oil-free. To do this start with an eyeshadow base. Swipe the primer across the eye and let it dry before you continue to the next step. Apply eyeliner. If you’re going for a typical black, brown or gray smoky eye, apply liner in one of those colors above the upper lash line, drawing line thicker in the middle of eye. Blend in color on bottom lashes. For color on the bottom (a key smokey eye look) you’ll want to use a eyeliner pencil because they’re easiest to smudge. Once the line is drawn, run your finger over it to smudge the line. You can also apply a bit of shadow to get full smudge effect. Apply light base color. Again, the key to a smokey eye is pairing a lighter base with the darker hue. Sweep a light, shimmery shadow over the lids to your browbone. Blend in darker color, but keep dark color below the crease. Now that you have the base and eyeliner on, it’s time to get the smokey effect. You need a darker eyeshadow shade. Using an eyeshadow brush blend in color starting at your lash line, blending up. Make sure to blend color into the lash line so the eye liner disappears. Stop deep color at crease. The key here is to blend, blend, blend. Finish with several coats of mascara. You’ll want to apply a few coats of mascara so lashes are thick and dark. If you don’t have naturally long, curled lashes, curl them with a lash curler first. Collette | Fall 2011
Kalee Barsha Lauri Seigler Jennifer Kinard Martin 312 Ivanhoe Rd. Walterboro, SC 29488 (beside Grillin & Chillin)
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Half the Sky: Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women Worldwide "This may be one of the most important books I've ever read. It caught my heart after the first page. Buy it. Read it. Pass it on." -Mary, Walterboro
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Forest Pointe A PA RT M E N TS
g n i a dy ? breed Written By Heather Strickland
are several people seated at my imaginary dinner table: Van Gogh, Tof myhere Abigail Smith Adams, Marie LaVeau, my mother in her 20s. At the head table sits Eve, the mysterious woman who unraveled the vision for all
of humanity with one decision. As I stare at all of these women, my eyes lock particularly on the mother of us all, and the question I’m dying to ask begins to form. “Where have all the alpha males gone?” It seems that after decades of asking our men to become more sensitive, the unexpected has happened: they are. Most men – and I stress the word “most” – have become much more domestic, often assisting us women in household chores, babysitting and even grocery shopping. I value this in men. It shows they may actually be listening to us. But there’s a larger role for women being written into the script. Women are taking on more and more than ever before. Whether you’re a stay-at-home mom or a career girl, the lifestyle is the same. Not only are we frying the bacon, but we’re buying it and sometimes slaughtering it. There is not one single element of today’s world that women are not directing or co-directing. And, it is exhausting. Is this how it was really intended to be in the Garden of Eden? Or were women before us happier with choosing to have simpler roles? After having the star roles in our own societies, can we ever go back to being a stage hand? While I strongly believe in women’s rights, and love my own independence, I’m a true Southern girl at heart. This means, as your alpha female, I internally crave a true Southern gentleman. I think there are others like me who desire a leader and a partner. We want the sensitive and strong male who can change the laundry and the oil; the man who can pray over a deer that he killed last season; a man who can pick out a great wine at last Saturday’s tasting and help cook the steak that it will go with. Those ideas may be sexist by the society that we women have helped to create, but they come with a sense of what we need. I am more than blessed to have found my match. But men need to remember that sensitivity is only sexy when it comes with strength. A woman in today’s world means being many things. And somewhere beneath all of the labels that we wear during the day, it means being the girl who gets to lay her head on her partner’s chest. No matter how strong we have to be during the day, we still need someone stronger to catch us. The moral of my story: masculinity means tears and muscle go together. Women do it all the time. Collette | Fall 2011
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Serving Up What Women Want Like most women, Collette loves a good blend of “bad boy” meets a refined “metrosexual man.” Andy Strickland has a bit of both. Written By Heather Strickland
Often spotted in his bright coral shirts and green shorts, Andy looks like he just stepped out a book of “What Charleston Men Should Wear.” But the barbed-wire tattoo around his well-defined arms quickly tells you that there’s more to this Colleton guy than his colorful closet might reveal. Andy, whose full first name is Robert, is a well-manicured, wellspoken and well-defined Lowcountry man who is never too proud to brag on his lady love. “I met the lady of my dreams, Danielle Nelms, in Beaufort while on routine patrol,” he said, giving his signature smile. “We crossed paths a couple of different occasions before exchanging telephone numbers and eventually courting.” A former state Highway Patrolman, Andy is an opinionated man, not hesitating to share his beliefs in karma and that “doing what is right is the best way to live.” That’s why he chose to live in his small hometown and be the long-arm of the local law. “Becoming a South Carolina Highway Patrolman and getting an opportunity to wear the colors of the blue and grey was something I knew I wanted to achieve at an early age,” he said. “I was 8-years-old and had a childhood friend whose father was a trooper and Little League Baseball Coach. I saw the good he did. It had a profound effect on me.” Recently, Andy hung up his trooper’s hat to open Main Street Bar and Grille, a popular watering hole for Walterboro residents and passers-by. Shrimp and grits, gritty liquor drinks on the rocks and scrumptious seafood are served up as some of the best local flavors. It’s Andy’s loveof community and a good time that helped him and a friend become business partners. “Derek and I saw the Main Street Grille as an opportunity,” he said. “The 12
market was there … a need for an upscale restaurant with an energetic atmosphere. We also feel a great need to keep our ‘Bucks in the Boro.’” But this budding business is a part of Andy’s portfolio: he also owns Carolina Chimney Sweeps and Half Moon Investments, a real estate company for flipping property. He also co-owns Indigo Creek Investments. “I had the misfortune of losing my parents at an early age, so, in return, I was able to gain a drive to be business-oriented and to try different things,” he said. More Than Muscle. Besides his strong sense of community and brazen business sense, Andy has what every girl wants: style. A lover of antiques and a more refined taste, Andy is more than a good shopping buddy: he has his own stylistic ideas for décor, clothes, and pampering. Here’s to a man who is not afraid of a “manicure” or masculine bronzer. Andy’s attention to his own details adds to the one feature that every woman loves: a great smile. “I think most women would agree that a man in uniform is very eye catching, but it’s because of what lies beyond the naked eye that one falls in love with another,” said Danielle. “Andy
has a great sense of humor and is very grounded. Stability is important to me and, in him, I found all those things I was looking for in Mr. Right. “Not to mention that is he very easy on the eyes,” she said. Under that tough exterior is the heart of father. Andy and Danielle are the proud parents of 5-year-old Hannah Grace.”She is a split image of me,” Andy says. “After the birth of my daughter, my relationship with Danielle grew and grew. And it has continued to grow over time.” Confidence Is Key. It’s hard to find a rugged man who has a sensitive side. Andy walks the line of confidence and charismatic kindness. “Do I see myself as a country boy or a city slicker? I would have to say both,” he says. “I enjoy hunting. But I can out-shop most women,” he says. “I occasionally enjoy letting my hair down, but a great typical night is home with Danielle, Hannah, Mollie and Gabbie, our two yorkies.” Andy says his ambition hasn’t stopped with fatherhood and owning businesses. He plans to go back into law enforcement and become Sheriff of Colleton County. “It has become a little personal watching our county’s crime rate incline,” he said. “I hope that Colletonians take the pride, effort and initiative to regain control of our county.” Collette | Fall 2011
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Collette | Fall 2011
“My art, in every form I create, has always been about embracing where and who I am in my life” Collette | Fall 2011
A woman starts her day much the same as your eye absorbs one of Jamie Avant’s paintings: You start at the beginning of the dawn, following the perfect diamond-shaped honeycombs as one becomes another and another. It’s a perfect flow of “to do” lists until the diamonds suddenly begin to melt, taking you into a beautiful blue river where soothing green leaves glide down a river. It’s the fantasy at the end of every woman’s busy work day. And it’s easy to see why women love this woman’s art work. Her talent and her brush are an ebb and flow of what women are. “My art, in every form I create, has always been about embracing where and who I am in my life,” said Jamie. At 26, Jamie is young. Yet, she carries a strangely exotic appeal to her artwork. Her work is internal, abstract and very friendly to every level of the art lover. A Lowcountry native, Jamie moved to Texas in her teen years and then to Chicago, where she studied at the Art Institute. At 18, she began her starving artist days in California, where she lived as a full-time artist. “I think I truly found myself as an artist while I lived in California,” she said. “Some people backpack across Europe to find themselves. I lived all over the San Francisco Bay.” Two years ago, she came back to the Lowcountry to be with her family. Watching Jamie work is like watching one piece of a woman take charge of the rest of her. Jamie’s artwork shows the variations in a woman’s life and brings forth a rainbow of emotions. “I always really think about every layer I paint - nothing is without reason or thoughtlessly used,” she said. “ I would rather waste a pile of paint that I’ve mixed than use a color I did 15
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How do you think art empowers you as a woman and can it inspire other women? “I do not deny I’ve made poor choices at some point, but I embrace that every choice has made me become who I am today and I wouldn’t change that for the world. I just hope that other women can see my art and my life and realize that true happiness comes from recognition and acceptance of who we are and where we come from.”
not intend to make. I always try to implement what I’ve learned on color theory, movement and flow.” Far from a starving artist, Jamie works by day as a legal assistant to a Walterboro-area lawyer. She holds one auction each year for public sales, and she participates in several Lowcountry art shows. But Jamie has taken her artwork to a whole new and more exotic pallet: her face. “As a woman, you know that you carry your world, your emotions on your face. I sometimes blend my own exotic makeup to match the mood of the painting I’m working on. Some people want that form of artistry done to their faces, as well,” she said. “This is a huge form of self-expression, to create an image from the background, lighting, movement.” This newer form of her artistry is something she wants to expand on in the local market. “I would love to help other women find their inner vixen, beast, clown, sorrow,” she said. No matter what you feel, you can create an image in that. Collette | Fall 2011
Tell me about your favorite piece of art that you have done. “I have always loved my piece called “Fishbowl” - which seems to be a favorite of the public as well. It was my favorite long before it was part of the 8th Annual Lowcountry Art Exhibition where it received the ‘People’s Choice Award.’ I felt very lost in a relationship at the time and the lyrics 'two lost souls swimming in a fishbowl year after year' hit me. I created my golden swish for the fish sweeping around the curve of a fishbowl.”
Let’s face it ladies, we love men and we raise them!
So who is Collette's Charmer?
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He is someone who represents those qualities that every woman wants: humor, intelligence, a sense of charity, a good listener. Of course, he has to be easy on the eyes. He lives in our life in many forms our little boys, our fathers, our brothers, our husbands, lovers, co-worker and last but not least, our friends. We share our lives with them on many levels, we love to love them … we love to hate them and I for one would hate to be without them! Life would be simply boring without men. They are delicious and awful things all in one. In each issue, the charmer will take many forms, he could be the bad boy all women love to love and should know better … the one mothers warn us about, he could be just too sexy or a wonderful husband, businessman, daddy – what Southern girl does not love her big daddy! Yes, he's the man we love to love or lust after! Much like the rest of us, Collette knows this type of man is hard to come by. So we need your help in finding her next charmer. The next Collette’s Charmer will be decided by you our readers… who charms you? We would like for you to submit a picture and essay on the man you think should be our next charming man. Mail your submissions to Collette at 1025 Bells Hwy, Walterboro, S.C. 29488, email Collette at firstname.lastname@example.org, or give us feedback on our Facebook page! Collette is looking forward to meeting your hunk of male flesh… - COLLETTE Collette | Fall 2011
Whether it’s the full head of dark brown hair, his ruddy-cheeked boyishness, or his quirky Southern need to always let a guest of his leave with a to-go plate of manly ribs, Jamie is on the list of Collette’s most lovable men.
Written by Heather Strickland
Everyone certainly has an opinion of Walterboro’s good-ole-boy, but one thing is for sure: Jamey Copeland is a lovable man who has just enough little boy in him that most women adore. “He is so caring … that comes across instantly when you meet him,” said fiancé Sharon Bowman. Jamey knows how to lead. The owner of a successful flower shop, The Flower Barn, Jamey still makes the ladies comfortable by sharing the space with his socialite mother, Patricia, who has opened up a corner of the shop to local artists. Gourds, tin watering cans, and even outdoorsmen clothes can be found here, painted and created by local women. But there's a lot more to this man. Jamey supports his community, often sponsoring youth sports teams and, yes, women's and men’s fundraisers. Once he heads home to remove his overalls, Jamey slides into his favorite burgundy recliner and becomes … a homebody. He loves living on his local "farm", a family-owned spread that is more of a cabin-centered retreat for his friends and family. But he doesn’t discriminate on his popular farm, letting arts groups and manly cooking teams share his space for the greater good of his hometown. The “farm,” as he calls it, has a cabin, back-swamp birdhouse and enough space for youngsters to explore in golf carts and four-wheelers. “I always look forward to coming back to the farm,” he said. Call Me Daddy. While Jamey has been shaking it on the single’s scene for some time, he is now taken, engaged to the lovely Sharon. But Sharon must share her time with Jamey with more than his momma: he is the proud father of two girls, Claire and Tabor. The dad is active in his girls’ lives, taking turns at sporting and social events. Jamey even attended a recent father-daughter dance. “Jamey is one of a kind,” said Sharon. “I’m blessed to have him and his family in my life.” Predictable, But Fun. It’s very unlikely that anyone who goes to the “Farm” for a visit with Jamey and his family will ever leave without a full stomach, an ice-cold beer or something stronger, or occasionally, even the shirt off of his back. Jamey’s good-ole-boy generosity gives him a good character nod. And even though every woman loves a good surprise now and then, Jamey fits the bill for a funny man who makes those in his company feel completely safe. In most all situations, you know where he stands. “We spend a lot of time laughing and having fun together,” Sharon said. “It’s just what life is about for us. What more could a girl ask for, right?” Collette | Fall 2011
The trick to being a working mom and thinking you have to sacrifice any Collette | Fall 2011
Collette | Fall 2011
d wife is to stop ything to have both
Written by Heather Strickland
atching her work in a criminal couroom, most would see Margie Bright Matthews as the woman who wears a suit and zebra striped stilettos to work. What most people don’t know is that she’s an old-school girl who prefers pastel pinks and fried chicken to sushi and suitcases. “This women’s lib thing is for the birds,” she said, laughing whole-heartedly from behind her big wooden desk. “We buy the bacon and fry it, but who would want to give up the nurturing up their children just to do that?” Margie is a powerfully competent and successful Lowcountry criminal defense attorney who takes on a lot of civil cases, representing those who suffer from pharmaceutical cases and car wrecks. She sees her job defending the accused as a means of keeping law enforcement officers unbiased and working their cases well. Margie is also the president of the Colleton County Bar Association, and sits on the boards of about 10 other law associations. After hours, she is the mother of four daughters and the wife of a man named Patrick. She also has 26 nieces and nephews and one grandchild. Her role as a mother and wife, she says, takes more focus than persuading a jury to do things her way. “The Margie you see in the courtroom is not the wife and mother you see at home,” she said. Margie married her husband after dating for only a few short months. He is a heating and cooling supervisor for a school district. “I went to law school as a single mom and then met my husband,” she said. “We’ve been married for 19 years.” When asked how she keeps her balance while juggling so many balls in the air, Margie again gives a big laugh. Then, she scans over the fourinch stack of files on her desk and softens her voice. “Sometimes I feel like the responsibility of being a career mom is unbalanced,” she admits, “but I always remind myself that I’m ‘Margie.’ I spend most of my time competing against myself. Something as simple as driving from my office in jeans and sneakers and watching a movie by myself helps me reset my buttons. I’m lucky because my husband under 21
stands I need this and he asks no questions. “And I respect my husband for being who he is. He is my partner,” she continued. “But traditional gender roles work best in my house,” she says. “I work hard in my career, but I’m 100-percent mom and wife at 5:01 p.m. I don’t walk in my house demanding his attention the way I do at work.” The trick to being a working mom and wife, she says, is to stop thinking you have to sacrifice anything to have both. “I get the respect that a working mom needs because I demand it,” she said. “I’ve never had a client ask me to give up a soccer game for a meeting. They know better than to ask.” Margie was born and raised a country girl near Walterboro. She is the youngest of nine children. Learning grit and grace from mom Jessie, Margie graduated from law school in 1989 and opened her own law firm in 1992. "I opened my practice on April Fool's Day," she said, with a laugh. In her career and at home, Margie believes her role as a career mom is to set a good example for her own children. This often means allowing her husband to shine. “I want my girls to see what a strong man is,” she said. “I’m the alpha at work but the beta at home. I cook and I plan the family trips. But I recognize that my husband is my husband. He is the head of my household. That’s the Christian lifestyle that I grew up in.” When asked what keeps this powerful woman working at full-speed, Margie says she’s finally learned the trick of what makes her happy. “I don’t feel guilty about working and being a mom anymore,” she said. “You better understand who you are as a person when you take on every role of who you are as a woman – businesswoman, mother, wife, lawyer and Christian. “I’ve stopped working so hard to give my family things. I value my time with them instead.”
What Makes You Powerful In Pumps?
“Career women and working moms need to realize you’re not to busy to have a relationship,” she said. “Being a woman is powerful. That means embracing all aspects of who you are, including bonding with another person.”
What Is Your Most Powerful Quality?
“My drive. I don’t give up. I had my daughter on a Friday and I started law school on that Monday.”
Do You Think It’s Still A Man’s World?
“I never thought it was a man’s world,” she said, laughing hard. “The two sides just need to remember we need each other to make the world go round.” 22
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Collette | Fall 2011
WISDOM & WISECRACKS
“Marry a man of good character because looks and money can change.”
"Never depend on a man to do things you should be able to do for yourself." -Louise
"Keep life simple." -Sarah
"You're never too old to love or dance." -Adriana
"Mother does know best!" -Kenna
COLLETTE ASKS "what's the best advice you've ever been given?"
"If he does not buy, buy for baby... then bye, bye him!" -Sheri
-Becky "When you don't have a choice on something, you can still choose your attitude."
"You better eat dessert first now... because it will end up in areas you don't like later." -Jennifer "You can tell what kind of husband a man will be by the way he treats his mother." "Boobs are power... -Pam marry rich!" "A successful man is one who makes more -Bethany money than his wife can spend. A successful "Trust your instincts woman is one who can find such a man." and intuitions... they are -Lana always right." "Always wear clean panties -Babette incase you're in a wreck."
"Self-confidence is a sexy thing." -Kim
“My mom told me not to take any S*&^ from anyone. Sometimes a good Southern girl has to be reminded that we don’t have to be nice all the time.”
Don't keep knowledge to yourself, share it so someone else can benefit from your wisdom." -Jeanette
"He who wants by the yard but tries by the inch should be kicked by the foot... if you want it, give it 100%." -Ashley Collette | Fall 2011
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H O M E T O W N H O S P I TA L I T Y
Come See Us! Chef Bryan Arrington
Everyone knows that a Lowcountry girl loves to flash color, but what are the universal hot Fall fashion trends?
Written by Lynne Riding
These tips will help you rock a red carpet or enjoy a fashionable fall day along the Coast. “A collage of color, texture and patterns are definitely in now,” said Lynne Riding, fashion director at The Arts Institute in Charleston. Riding says working women should not be scared to mix lace with prints and tweeds and leather. The play on patterns emphasis the changing weather in the Lowcountry, and can make any layered outfit more soft and feminine for the Fall. Playing up your girly style might be the most powerful fashion trend right now. “We are seeing a complete mix of wonderfullytextured tweeds, leather and brilliantly-colored printed fabrics,” she said. “This is an opportunity to re-work clothing you already have in a mix of layers. Put a polka dot chiffon blouse over lycra tank with a tweed skirt.”
So What’s The Big Influence For The Fall? Lynne says, Anything Victorian! “We’re seeing everything lace, with blacks and dark reds and blues.”
A Few Fall Fashion Tips
• Do soft layering with multi-patterned T’s and skirts. Accessorize it, and make it more feminine with a leather belt. • Throw on your favorite short dress from the previous season over slightly longer skirts or pants, and accessorize it with pops of color via layered necklaces or feminine scarves. • Younger women can play up more lace-covered outfits, while working women or moms can show off lace in a top or blended with tweeds. Lynne Riding is the fashion director at The Arts Institute of Charleston. She has written about fashion in London and Paris for Fashion Weekly.
“Furs are in vibrant colors now, faux and real,” said Lynne. “Parkas are also big. Make it short-thigh length, and use fur to trim it with a color contrast.”
This top makes a great contrast to any layer, bringing in a pop of color with a Victorian style. Rich jewel tones are essential to the perfect fall look. Collette | Fall 2011
Accessories with feathers are showing up everywhere, from celebs to fashionistas on the street! Find the feathered fashion in jewelry, clothing, and hair extensions.
This sheer top is a perfect way to play up your girly side, paired with wide legged jeans and suede boots to bring in a little downhome flair.
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MELTDOWNON AISLE 3 “
Parents of toddlers fear the dreaded trip to the store where our sweet, precious bundles of joy decide it is the perfect time to collapse into a fit of hysterics over a box of Fruit Roll-Ups.
It never seems to fail that during this moment of meltdown we cross paths with in-laws, other parents or worse: people who do not have children who think their kids, if they had kids, would never! (I used to be one of those people). After an eight-hour day of smiling at clients, a two-hour commute, managing a husband, finances, a broken washing machine and several four-legged friends – all while wearing heels – I positively loathe going into a store with my two-year-old daughter.
Written by Missy Hardee
Fear-not, forlorn mommies, I have compiled a quick list of practical mommy ideas that help with public fallouts.
Keep It Together Stay calm. My toddler pays much more attention when I take on a serious, calm voice as opposed to getting upset. Essentially, don’t add fuel to the fire. Besides, it only draws more attention to the fiasco that is your trip to Wal-Mart.
If your child takes a nap and it is naptime, then expect a fussy baby. If your little one is teething, expect a fussy baby. If possible, plan errands around your tot’s schedule. Nearly six months into being a new mom, I realized that life goes on. You still have to run these errands and you still have to make time for yourself and your significant other. With that being said, moms of toddlers have to learn how to accomplish tasks with a pooh bear in tow. It may not always be pretty, but it’s real. And whoever said bribery was wrong never had kids. For 25-cents, I can buy a rubber ball out of those machines near the entrance of the store and keep her completely entertained until she drops it and it rolls under an aisle out of reach. Enter a new problem … 30
Discuss & Distract
Explain to your sweet cheeks that “we use our inside voice” and then quickly distract their atten tion. Children love to help so present them with a task to keep them occupied. After explaining why her behavior is not acceptable, I will ask my little one, “Help mommy find (fill in the blank)” or Do you see…?” Time-out is not an option in the middle of a store, and I am not one who believes in leaving the store every time my little one has a fit. By leaving, we fail to establish the proper behaviors for shopping. The embarrassment will be coupled with irritation because now you will have to return at a later date to complete your shopping. By following this tip, it will allow you to quickly finish your errands and escape relatively unscathed.
Always remember, no one way of parenting is perfect. The key is to do your best and show your love. Now when I see another mom in the store with a pudgy, red-faced screaming cutie pie, I just smile sympathetically and thank God that today isn’t my day -- and then I watch as my little beauty is staring happily at her box of Fruit Roll-Ups. At the end of the day, a meltdown in the store is small compared to the many wonderful memories you have with your honey bunny. Missy Hardee, a personal banker, is married and the mother of a busy 2-year old daughter. She was born and raised in the Lowcountry, which she still calls home.
Collette | Fall 2011
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Wine 101: Spanish Wines Written By Jackie Boyd
The lovely country of Spain is making some beautiful wines of very good value. From the arid, wind-swept high plains to the lush green area that sits atop of Portugal, this region is producing crisp dry whites and bold robust reds. Spanish wines are more old-world style than the California or Argentinian wines. The New world style is very fruit driven, but these old-world
Spanish styles have more layers of minerality and texture. Spanish wines are wines produced in the southwestern European country of Spain. Located on the Iberian Peninsula, Spain has over 2.9 million acres planted—making it the third largest producer of wine in the world, the largest being France followed by Italy. This is due, in part, to the very low yields and wide spacing of the old vines planted on the dry, infertile soil. Surpris-
ingly, 80-percent of the country’s wine production is from only 20 grapes. The ones that we love to drink now are grapes using Tempranillo, and Garnacha, coming from the Rioja and Ribera del Duero. Rias Baixas in the northwest region of Galicia is known for its white wines made from Albariño grape. Jackie Boyd has been studying, drinking and teaching wine for more than 30 years. She owns a wine shop and travels internationally discovering new wines and wine trends.
Learning Wine Wines are often labeled according to the amount of ageing the wine has received. When the label says vino joven (“young wine”) or sin crianza, the wines will have undergone very little, if any, wood ageing. Depending on the producer, some of these wines will be meant to be consumed very young - often within a year of their release. For the vintage year (vendimia or cosecha) to appear on the label, a minimum of 85% of the grapes must be from that year’s harvest. The three most common ageing designations on Spanish wine labels are: Crianza red wines are aged for 2 years with at least 6 months in oak. Crianza whites and rosés must be aged for at least 1 year with at least 6 months in oak. Reserva red wines are aged for at least 3 years with at least 1 year in oak. Reserva whites and rosés must be aged for at least 2 years with at least 6 months in oak. Gran Reserva wines typically appear in above-average vintages. These red wines require at least 5 years ageing, 18 months of which in oak and a minimum of 36 months in the bottle. Gran Reserva whites and rosés must be aged for at least 4 years with at least 6 months in oak. Collette | Fall 2011
* Wine Fact Did you know that a pickle has more sulfites than a bottle of wine?!
“My quest is to find a $10 bottle that tastes like a $200 one.” These Top Spanish Wines Cost Between $10 and $15, and Are Perfect For Lowcountry Food and Weather! Mokoroa Txakoli • A slightly sparkling, very dry white wine • Normally served as an aperitif and is drunk within one year of bottling • Has a pale green color and goes great with soft-shelled crab and smoked meats
Salneval Albariño • A crisp, refreshing white that pairs up with all types of shellfish and seafood • Once thought to have come from the Rhine River region of Alsace • Will please all who want clean flavors and rich, ripe fruit.
Antaño Rioja • Ruby red in color, with aromas and flavors of berries, plum, tobacco, vanilla, leather and herb • Perfect for ribs, steaks, or anything beef off the grill • Give it a light chill to bring all the flavors together 33
oul S food for the
Serving Up Soul
Opening the quaint “A Soulful Taste” restaurant in Walterboro in the middle of a recession took more than gumption...
It took owners Ze “Toya” and Marcus Pinckney making
big life changes, including saving money to start the business by living in a privy behind Marcus’ parents’ home.
Toya, 26, long held a dream of bringing soul food back to the table, so she made the life-changing deci-
sion to leave her teaching career behind. As a girl, she remembers her mom’s home-cooking being at the center
of every family gathering. “I want working moms and busy parents to have real food on the table instead of just take out,” she said. “People don’t cook the way they used to. This is our culture we’re keeping alive by reminding people how good soul food is.”
The restaurant is serving some of her mom’s staple recipes and some of Toya’s own creations. The buffet-
style bakery and hot bar makes sure folks get enough of what they came for. “As a woman, I wanted to work for myself,” she said. “Why soul food? This is what I know. We’re saving a Southern tradition.” 34
Collette | Fall 2011
WANT TO TRY YOUR OWN SOULFUL CREATION?
Keep Your Priorities, YOUR Priorities
Tackle this basic recipe and remember, Toya says "Onions, sugar, garlic and butter are the fried basics to any good Southern soul recipe!" • Start by frying some bacon. (2 pieces or a pack, depending on how much soup you want to make). Leave the grease in the pan.
TOYA'S OKRA& TOMATO SOUP
• Add 1 tbsp of butter. Be careful not to let the butter burn. • Add 1 can of diced tomatoes. Use the juice. • Then, add 1 small bag of frozen cut okra. • Fill the empty tomato can with water and add to the boiling brew until the okra is almost covered with water. • Add a small can of tomato paste and stir until the consistency is thick and creamy.
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“Move Over Scheherazade…I’m Coming!” A first hand account of how this breast cancer survivor plans to live indefinitely through her stories By Becky Dingle Summerville, S.C.
As a child I loved reading fantasy. In the 1950’s fantasy was found in the classical anthology “1001 Arabian Nights.” Little did I know then that one day I would be in competition against the fictitious Scheherazade… and the clock…in a storytelling contest. However, this is where I find myself today. My competition started August 31, 2010 and ends May 29, 2013… when I complete my 1002 stories…one more than Scheherazade. In a sense, though competitors, we share a common interest, a love of storytelling that changes lives…one story at a time.
but it had to be real…it had to be me…my voice. I found it at St. Jude’s Chapel of Hope in Trust, North Carolina last summer. My life was given the direction I so desperately sought through the spirit of Beverly Barutio, a cancer survivor, and creator of the chapel. She always said, “ You know…cancer is just a little annoyance…certainly nothing to get in the way of life.” I returned home and started my blog: www.chapelofhopestories. com. To date I have written over 450 inspirational stories with nearly 42,000 views…one uplighting story a day…to remind everyone how beautiful life is. This year our team walked for St. Jude’s Chapel of Hope in the “Race for the Cure” because “hope” is what keeps me sharing the power of the story.
"Watch out Scheherazade…I’m getting closer… one story at a time!"
I am a four-year breast cancer survivor. Like thousands of Americans I am a person “living” with cancer…with the emphasis on “living.” Every day is a victory, one to be celebrated with joy for living. And I do… because I finally found my voice. By the end of my first year of treatments I felt like a boxer in a ring…taking on Mr. Surgery, Mr. Chemotherapy, and Mr. Radiation. I survived each round but was definitely taking a few “knock-downs” in the process. Still, I was and am, happy to be in the fight for life for as long as I can keep punching. With precious time…came a sense of wanting to give back… 36
3 of the Ya's. Linda Lynn, Brooke and myself on the cruise to the Bahamas. Collette | Fall 2011
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Sticking It To Our Problems Women’s health is a growing medicine and a multibillion dollar industry. But one aspect of caring for ourselves is more than just sticking needles in your skin. Acupuncture is an ancient Chinese medicine that is growing in popularity and medical credibility. It uses a system of points that regulate the body’s physiology, allowing a “flow” of energy and unblocking what the medicine sees as problem points. What was once seen as a last ditch effort in curing sinuses and stress relief is now targeting women who suffer from a range of illnesses, from gynecological problems to sleeping disorders and headaches. “We treat everything from hot flashes to symptoms of PMS and depression,” said Amy Jo Gengler, a masters degree-Acupuncturist and owner of Re-Soul Acupuncture in Charleston, S.C. Amy Jo is also nationally-board certified in acupuncture and Chinese herbal medicine. She specifies in oncology, cardiology and gynecology. “Acupuncture is so beneficial to women because it is personal. We spend an hour just talking to our clients
and listening,” she said. “It is wholistic. Everything matters when treating the body – who you are married to matters. What you’re eating matters. Everything about you creates who you are and what you need to fix your medical problems.” Amy Jo says her profession is female-heavy, with a growing number of graduating acupuncturists being women. Her client list is also mostly female: according to Amy Jo, more than two-third of her clients are women. “I’m in my ninth year with this medicine,” she said. “Learning continues because it works. More people are realizing the power of this unbelievable medicine.” Kim Bridge, a Walterboro woman and mother, is quick to praise the healing power of acupuncture. Kim routinely sees an acupuncturist in Charleston to help relieve painful and reoccurring sinus symptoms. “It gives you an overall feeling that it’s working,” she said. “It’s not painful at all. And the results are, for the most part, immediate.”
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