Genre Fatigue in Vegas by Lillian Daniel
Remembering Orlando, Moving forward Together
Social Support Systems by Ora Uzel
On Being an Ally
by Kaitlin Pohland
Phillip & Vee: a Story
July 2017
Letter from the Editor
As I write this, it is July 4th, 2017. Happy Independence Day, if you are reading from the United States - but I’m remembering that patriotism is more complex than agreeing or disagreeing with your administration - it has more to do with culture and a sense of home. I want to use this space this month to thank, from the depths of my gratitude, Co-ZINE’s editing intern, Sarah. You can read about her in last month’s issue. In this one, you can admire her work. Even while she was stage managing a play, Sarah laid out over half of this issue, and we are so proud to share it! As always, you can reach me with questions and comments at contact.cozine@gmail.com.
Andrea Becker, editor in chief
July 2017| Co-ZINE
1
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Iowa Legal Aid
CRITICAL SERVICES FOR VULNERABLE IOWANS Iowa Legal Aid is the only statewide provider of free, civil legal assistance to lowincome Iowans. Iowa Legal Aid:
Helps people with critical legal needs that affect safety, shelter, sustenance and health: Protects victims of domestic violence; Protects families from unsafe housing and illegal evictions; Protects elderly Iowans from consumer fraud, elder abuse and financial exploitation; and Secures health care, SSI and basic public benefits for low-income Iowans.
Provides services in all 99 counties through 10 regional offices.
Does not handle fee generating cases or criminal cases CLIENT DEMOGRAPHICS: 72% are women; 30% have a disability 24% are age 60 or older; Over 16,100 children lived in the households served
2016 Closures by Case Type Family 29%
Housing 30%
Juv Empl Health 3% 3% 6%
Misc. 8% Income Maint. 9%
Consumer 12%
UNMET NEED FOR LEGAL ASSISTANCE:
Over 499,000 Iowans (16.7%) have incomes below 125% of the federal poverty guidelines and are income eligible for Iowa Legal Aid’s services.
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10,000 families are turned away or underserved annually due to lack of staff resources.
“Iowa Legal Aid is a very accomplished, productive, and organized program providing high quality effective and efficient legal services to its clients.” — Report from Legal Services Corporation Office of Program Performance
TABLE OF CONTENTS
8 One Iowa Media Guide 12 Photography by Lars Freeman 19 On Being an Ally 20 Genre Fatigue in Vegas 26 Phillip & Vee 28 Social Support Systems 38 Reject Hatred 42 Zodiac 48
KEY
4 Co-ZINE | www.cozinemagazine.com
Events Calendar
July 2017 | Co-ZINE
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Headquarters Community Productions 299 Main Street #44, Dubuque, IA 52001 Co-ZINE is a monthly, online publication. Links to this publication are found at www.codbq.org/cozine, but Co-ZINE is not an affiliate of Co Dubuque. The view represented in Co-ZINE are strictly those of their authors and do not represent the views of Co-ZINE or Co Dubuque staff members or volunteers. Advertisements involving products or services are not investigated by Co-ZINE and Co-ZINE does not claim responsibility for these products or services. © 2017 Community Productions
Call for Writers and Artists
Editor in Chief Andrea Becker
We consider submissions from members of the LGBTQ+ community and allies.
Editing Intern Sarah Mueller Layout and Design Alina Crow
Articles • Personal Experiences • Opinion Pieces • Photography/Art • Journalism • …and more!
Owner Luis Morteo
Submit to contact.cozine@gmail.com
Everything Else Cindy Lewis Contact Co-ZINE contact.cozine@gmail.com
Notification Applicants will be notified by the 25th of the month.
July 2017 | Co-ZINE
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EVENTS Ames Pflag Ames, Youth and Shelter Services Building Every Second Tuesday of the month at 7:00 PM 420 Kellogg Ave, Ames IA https://oneiowa.org/events/ pflagames@yahoo.com
Cedar Rapids CR Pride Fest, NewBo City Market July 8th, 2017 www.crpridefest.com Billy Elliot The Musical, Theatre Cedar Rapids June 30th to July 22, 7:30PM 102 3rd Street SE, Cedar Rapids, IA https://www.theatrecr.org/event/billy-elliot-musical/all/ 319-366-8591 Every Saturday Night Drag Show, Belle’s Basix Satudays at 11PM 3916 1st Ave NE, Cedar Rapids, IA https://www.facebook.com/bellesbasix/ 319-363-3194 Pflag Transformations, Grant Wood AEA July 13th and July 27, 6PM – 8PM 4401 6th Street SW, Cedar Rapids, IA http://www.pflagcr.com/events/ Pflag, Grant Wood AEA July 13th, 7PM – 9PM 4401 6th Street SW, Cedar Rapids, IA http://www.pflagcr.com/events/
Des Moines LGBTQIA Sexual Assault Support Group 1st and 3rd Wednesdays 2nd and 4th Mondays of the month 7 PM 3030 Merle Hay Rd, Des Moines, IA https://oneiowa.org/events/
Transformations Iowa, Mickle Center Every Wednesday at 7 PM 1620 Pleasant Street, Des Moines, IA sophia.transformations@gmail.com or 515-745-6766 https://oneiowa.org/events/
LGBTQ Grief Group, Hamilton’s 3rd Monday of every month at 6PM
Charles City
3601 Westown Parkway, West Des Moines 515-697-3666
Transcend Support Group Meeting Charles City Library July 15th 5 PM to 7PM 106 Milwaukee Mall, Charles City, IA http://transcendnorthiowa.com/ 319-359-7774
Des Moines Vet Center LGBTQ Support Group Des Moines Vet Center 2nd Monday of every month 1821 22nd Streey #115, West Des Moines, IA 515-284-4929 https://oneiowa.org/events/
Iowa City
1st Friday Breakfast Club, Hoyt Sherman Place 1st Friday of every month at 7 AM 1501 Woodland Ave, Des Moines, IA http://www.ffbciowa.org/
Elation Drag Show, Studio 13 Every Saturday, doors open at 7PM 13 South Linn Iowa City, IA http://www.sthirteen.com/
PFLAG Des Moines, Unitarian Church Every 3rd Tuesday of the month at 7 PM 1800 Bell Ave, Des Moines, IA huber_susan@msn.com https://oneiowa.org/events/
Karaoke and $1 drinks, Studio 13 Every Saturday, doors open at 7PM 13 South Linn Iowa City, IA http://www.sthirteen.com/
POCQAT, Monsoon Community Resource Center 1st Sunday of the month 12PM to 2PM 4952 Franklin Ave, Des Moines, IA pocqatrox@gmail.com sethbackham@muawi.org
GLBTQ Movie Open to Public for Free Iowa City Senior Center Every Monday, at 4PM 28 South Linn Iowa City, IA https://oneiowa.org/events/
EVENTS Mason City Transcend Clothing Closet First Congregational UCC July 22nd 3 PM to 5PM 100 1st Street NE, Mason City, IA http://transcendnorthiowa.com/ 319-359-7774 One Iowa NORTH Monthly Meetings First Presbyterian Church 2nd Monday of every month at 7 PM 100 1st South Pierce Ave, Mason City, IA https://oneiowa.org/events/
The Quad Cities Euchre, Mary’s on 2nd Every Sun at 5PM 832 W 2nd Street, Davenport, IA 563-884-8014 Drag Show, Connections Nightclub Every Saturday and Friday starting at 10 PM 822 W 2nd Street, Davenport, IA 563-322-1121 Spectrum’s Monthly Support Group Meeting Metropolitan Community Church Every first Saturday of the month at 7 PM 2930 W Locust Street, Davenport IA 563-324-8281
Dubuque BANGIN’ IN THE USA DRAG SHOW! Sat, Jul 8, 2017 10:00pm Sun, Jul 9, 2017 1:00am The Smokestack LGBTQ+ YOUTH GROUP Thursday, July 13, 2017, 4:30pm 6:30pm Multicultural Family Center CO-MMUNITY DUBUQUE GAME NIGHT! Thursday, July 13, 2017, 6:00pm 8:00pm The Smokestack ALL-AGES ALCOHOL FREE BOWLING! Sunday, July 16, 2017, 3:00pm 5:00pm Cherry Lanes at Diamond Joes NW IL GSA VOLUNTEER TRAINING Sunday, July 16, 2017, 4:00pm 6:00pm Jo Daviess Carroll CTE Academy LGBTQ+ ADULT GROUP Thursday, July 27, 2017, 4:30pm 6:30pm Multicultural Family Center
In June, One Iowa joined forces with some Iowa allies to create a new LGBTQ media guide. Local and national organizations released the guide to provide accurate information and encourage appropriate representation of the LGBTQ community in the media. One Iowa, Progress Iowa, and Interfaith Alliance of Iowa jointly released the guide.
I
So what did local leaders have to say?
owa and the United States have made significant advances toward equality over the past decade, which is a reason to celebrate and appreciate all the sacrifices and progress made! However, make no mistake, all of our freedom and liberty is on the chopping block daily. We have to recognize these are still challenging times. We must recognize the battle is far from over and we must remain vigilant. Our progress should not be taken for granted. -Sen. Matt McCoy, Des Moines
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GBTQ Iowans have much to celebrate. Over the past 8 years, we’ve seen society move in an inclusive direction. Because of the United States Supreme Court Ruling on Marriage Equality, LGBTQ Iowans (whose marriages have been recognized in Iowa since 2009) are protected in all 50 states of the Union. LGBTQ people who wish to serve in the armed forces now serve openly. Many Iowa schools [and employers] host gay-straight alliance groups. Iowa law has protected citizens from discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity for 10 years. Still, many challenges remain. Many states allow employment and housing discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity. Congress has failed to pass the Federal Employment Non-Discrimination Act. Abusive, anti-gay “conversion therapy” which has been denounced by the AMA, is legal in Iowa. Transgender Americans are murdered at an alarming rate: The Advocate counts 12 trans-
gender women murdered so far in 2017. All women of color. Here in Iowa, gender-fluid transgender teen, Kedarie/Kandicee Johnson (the teen used two names) was shot and left in an alley. We should revel in the progress of the past 8 years, with the full realization that organized, powerful forces seek to turn back the clock. In move toward erasing LGBTQ Americans, the U.S. Census Bureau will not collect information about sexual orientation or gender identity on the 2020 census. Now, more than ever, we must be steadfast and defiant in visibly celebrating our lives and claiming our rights as citizens. -Rep. Liz Bennett, State Representative, Assistant Democratic Leader, First Openly-LGBTQ Woman to Serve in the Iowa Legislature
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T
he LGBTQ community has been an important part of both US and Iowa History. Through decades of hard work, LGBTQ individuals have begun securing equal civil protections throughout the country.
to portraying LGBTQ individuals in the news. News outlets must strive to build and maintain trust within the LGBTQ community through a commitment to following best practices that address these issues. As the leading LGBTQ advocacy organizaThese efforts continue as One tion, One Iowa is committed to Iowa works to preserve and providing this assistance. advance equality for LGBTQ Iowans. It is imperative that We believe this resource will help LGBTQ individuals are accu- organizations begin to improve rately represented throughout our their understanding of the community. LGBTQ individuals LGBTQ community. If outlets continue to be stigmatized and have any questions or concerns, stereotyped, practices that con- they should feel free to reach out tribute to creating environments to us for additional guidance. that are unsafe or openly hostile. Terminology, pronouns, names, and so much more are critical
-Daniel Hoffman-Zinnel, Executive Director, One Iowa
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A
s we celebrate our great and diverse community and honor our many accomplishments we must keep pushing forward to ensure full equality for all and make a commitment to stay vigilant so that rights now gained are not lost tomorrow. The truth is our transgender brothers and sisters face violence and widespread discrimination, LGBTQ people lack equal protection under the law in many states, our children are bullied, our desperate take their own lives, and I am one of just a very small handful of LGBTQ citizens to hold elected office in Iowa. There are vicious forces at work everyday that would like to take away our right to marry, to adopt, and to live freely, some would even take our lives. We must never become complacent or too comfortable, rights won over the course of decades by the blood sweat and tears of our many martyrs can be taken away in the blink of an eye. We must forever stand in solidarity with all members of our community and band together so that we can fully realize the promise of our movement.� -Chris Schwartz, Openly Gay Black Hawk County Supervisor
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I
owans, including people of faith and no faith across our state, are honored to stand with family, friends, neighbors, and co-workers in the LGBTQ community. Iowa has a strong, progressive history of being on the right side of history regarding equal rights and protections. There is little doubt that Iowa will continue on that path to ensure all Iowans are treated with dignity, respect and equality under the law. Under no circumstances should anyone be discriminated against or face violence simply because of their sexual orientation or gender identity. Education is key in this journey toward equality. It is our hope that this guide will move our state further down the path to understanding and accuracy. -Connie Ryan, Executive Director, Interfaith Alliance of Iowa
Read the guide:
https://s3.amazonaws. com/s3.progressiowa.org/ images/Iowa_LGBTQ_Media_Guide_2017.pdf 16 Co-ZINE | www.cozinemagazine.com
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Lars Freeman is a 31 year old transgender advocate who was born and raised in Buffalo, NY. Lars started his transition a year and a half ago on testosterone and is a few months post-operation. Lars’s goals are to reach out and help his community by sharing his story through art, fitness and community action. He took this photo at the Erie Basin Marina in Buffalo.
ON BEING AN ALLY
FAMILY
ON BEINGSECTION AN ALLY
by Kaitlin Pohland
I
grew up without any fear. I have average looks, I was fairly athletic, I did well in school, I have great friends, and an amazing family. All the same can be said about my younger brother, except the fear. The difference: I identify as straight. or most of my brother’s life, we had an inkling that he was F gay. My mom says she really started to wonder when he was four years old. I know a lot of parents who would try to cover that up. They would do everything in their power to squash any hints of what they considered abnormal behavior. I thank my lucky stars every day that I don’t have narrow-minded parents. y parents always encouraged us to be true to ourselves. M They told us they would always love us no matter what. Sexual orientation of any kind would never change their love for us. They did all that they could to make sure we knew that we had their full support.
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My mom was a wreck when my brother came out three years ago, and my dad went radio silent for a few months. Hold on. Where did those supposedly supportive parents go? They were still there, I promise – they were just in shock. Fear is what caused my parents reaction. Their love for my brother never changed. The unknown factors of his future are what overwhelmed them. They could not forget the past. Bullying started right out of the gate for my brother. I have watched him fight to figure out who he was. I watched him hide his true self. I was the typical overprotective sister. Living in a small town meant that word always got back to me if someone was giving him grief. There were countless times that I marched up to some punk and gave him or her a piece of my mind. No one said anything derogatory or mean to my brother and didn’t hear from me. I even gave my husband an ultimatum when we were dating. My brother had not come out
yet, but I didn’t care. I made it clear that if he didn’t support my brother for being true to himself no matter what, then he should walk away right then and there. My brother was (and still is) the happiest I have ever seen him. I was so proud of him for finally being at peace. He was so relaxed when he came out to me that I had to have him repeat himself. Once he came out, it became easier for him to stand up for himself. He no longer had to prove himself – he became his own ally. The most important ally is yourself. Coming out to my parents and I was the easy part for him, so I can’t
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When he followed me to college, I was immediately ready to protect him again. I never needed to do so. I’m not going to pretend that I haven’t struggled since he came out. I have never once struggled with his sexuality. I have struggled with the hate and politics that surround it all. To make matters even more interesting, we are Catholic.
imagine what it would be like for people to face the question of acceptance from their own family members. Because he had the core support at home, he could become fully comfortable with himself. Most of high school was a hard time for him. He came out before his senior year of high school, so he didn’t have a lot of time to really revel in his own individuality. He did make strides though. He was the first openly gay person to be nominated for the Homecoming Court in our town, and people have approached him for advice with their struggles. Seeing him make a difference in other people’s lives has been so inspiring. In college, he has flourished.
Ah yes, the dreaded “C” word. My brother came out at a Catholic retreat. He was moved to do so, and was immediately encouraged and accepted by his peers. Now, I’m not saying there hasn’t been any issues since then. There have been times when my brother is uncomfortable at Mass or my mother has left crying because we feel like our family is being called out from the behind the pulpit. That is not the case in every Catholic church. Many have watched my brother grow up as a very active member in the church. They have realized that he is no different than them. He has found allies in a place that didn’t seem possible. My faith was shaken for a couple of years. I felt like I was betraying my brother by being Catholic. He informed me that was stupid. I learned that it is okay to not fully agree with what others
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believe. We have received so much support within the church, which proves that I can be Catholic and be an ally. No one can tell me I can’t, because in the end it is not about others. My faith is mine. I now actually work for three Catholic churches. That was not an easy decision for me. When the position came up, I hesitated. Was I putting ideals that I don’t agree with ahead of my brother? He told me to go for it, and I have not regretted it. Sure, there are opinions of my peers that I do not agree with, but I have not once felt attacked for my beliefs. I’m all for differing opinions. It’s what makes the conversations, individuals, and the world interesting. But not hate. With hate comes fear. Fear can be conquered with acceptance, love, and support. No one should ever feel alone. My brother never did, and I believe that is why he is so comfortable and true to himself. Many people do not get to experience the support they deserve. I have an equal sign tattooed on the inside of my left wrist. It is the sign closest to my heart. I got this tattoo two years ago while studying abroad in Dublin, Ireland. While I was there, Ireland was making history. In May of 2015, they passed a referendum to amend the Constitution of Ireland to recognize same-sex marriage. The love I witnessed gave me so much hope. It was a beautiful step in the right direction. My brother faces a single question quite often: Why? It’s never about why. I did not choose to identify as straight, and he did not choose to live
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in fear and fight for his rights as a human being. I will always support him and those who must struggle more than I do. We are all the same, but so wonderfully different. We all equally deserve love. Kaitlin Pohland is from Decorah, Iowa. After graduating from Loras College in 2016, she now lives in Little Falls, Minnesota where she is a volunteer coordinator. She will do anything she can to avoid housework. If she is late for something, it’s because she was reading. She lives with her husband and their two huskies.
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GENRE FATIGUE IN VEGAS
FAITH
RELIGION + SPIRITUALITY
“When you’re given a box of candy, don’t gulp it all down . . .” - Proverbs 25:16 The Message
E
ven before I got food poisoning at the Las Vegas buffet, I knew it wasn’t for me.
Up and down the Las Vegas strip, cultures, countries and centuries compete as genres: Paris, New York, the Roman Empire and Hollywood. The Vegas buffets are similarly ambitious in scope and style, serving sushi, tortilla soup, prosciutto, fried rice, coconut curry, and etven chicken and waffles. I sampled it all. Nobody forced me to. My logical self knows that certain foods do not mix well together. But there at the United Nations of food, it was like I was a diplomat and world peace depended on my getting to know everyone. At the risk of overstating matters, let me say that Las Vegas is not an
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understated place. A little bit of everything can be too much. Las Vegas buffets present the same problem the whole city does. All those miniature versions of iconic sites—an Eiffel tower, a medieval castle, a tropical beach, a statue of Julius Caesar – are stuck in the middle of nowhere, on a strip. Unrooted, all those genres are unsettling. But perhaps we need that. Excess makes us miss restraint. Bright lights make us miss the dark. An overrated buffet makes us long for an underrated sandwich. Vacations make us long for home. And perhaps that’s why we go. Thank you, God for the gift of travel and thank you for the gift of eventually coming home.
Lillian Daniel’s new book Tired of Apologizing for a Church I Don’t Belong To: Spirituality without Stereotypes, Religion without Ranting is now available for purchase, but you can hear it all for free at 1st Congregational Church of Dubuque, Iowa on Sunday mornings. Pastor Lillian is a member of Co-Dubuque’s board.
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PHILLIP AND VINCENT
T
he apartment on Main Street had been their residence for two years, but it had never truly felt like home. There was something about it, a sense of disconnection which seemed to seep from the very walls, which thwarted Phillip and Vee’s every attempt to make the place theirs. After several long discussions and budgeting sessions, they had decided to move and Vee hated every second of it. It wasn’t that they were leaving the apartment, but the logistics and work of moving: finding a new place, packing
everything up, the process of moving their possessions. All it amounted to was additional stress compounded upon the chaos of everyday life. The only thing that made the experience even remotely tolerable was Phillip. He’d been tenacious though the entire process, scouring both classified and online postings and compiling a list of prospective homes. When they weren’t at work, Phillip was leading the effort in getting unnecessary items packed up
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early. Every day after work they would look at more apartments. Two weeks into the hunt, they’d found a plan ‘B’ and ‘C’, but nothing that particularly jumped out as the perfect place. As the truck rumbled along, Vee sighed and leaned back in his seat. He looked out the window, staring but not seeing, lost in his own thoughts. “How many do we have on the agenda for today?” he asked, breaking the silence. Without taking his eyes off the road, Phillip responded, “Only three. One looks really nice, though. I can’t wait to see it.” Phillip’s upbeat, chipper attitude made Vee smile. The properties they were visiting could have been the worst imaginable, but Phillip would still go into them optimistically. He pulled the truck into the parking lot of the realtor’s office, and after a quick in and out the pair were back on the road with three sets of keys. Vee punched the first address into the ancient Tom-Tom Phillip had from years ago, and helped him navigate through the streets of Dubuque. The first property was only a few blocks from their apartment. “So, um, it looks interesting.” Phillip said. His optimism was forced. The
building was four stories tall, made of poured cement painted a dark blue-gray which had started to crack and flake off. Vee checked the address on the keys. “Apartment four.” The front face of the building held two doors, one numbered and the other not. They entered through the unlabeled option, and were greeted with a set of stairs heading straight up. It took only a moment for the smell to hit them. The air was stale, coupled with a heavy warmth
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that seemed to make the odor billow in the air. Vee followed Phillip up the stairs, making mental notes along the way. Somewhere in the building a dog was barking. It sounded like a large animal. The air grew less stale the further up they went, but it was replaced by the thick scent of patchouli and mildew. At the top of the stairs was a single door, adorned with a black ‘3’ sticker. They stood there for a moment, confused. “Did we miss it?” “Maybe it’s accessible from the outside?” Phillip replied. The made their
exit quickly, breathing easier out of the oppressive scents within. The two walked down the sidewalk, around the building. Grass forced its way through deep gouges in the concrete, clumped in patches of dead brown stalks. Against the back of the building, almost like scaffolding, wooden stairs rose up to a single door. They couldn’t see if it was numbered. “I bet that’s it.” Phillip said, assuredly. The stairs were treacherously narrow, and zig-zagged their way up the back face. Vee couldn’t imagine trying to finesse their couch to the top of it. This
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was punctuated when Phillip caught a splinter from the banister, his cheer momentarily broken as he cursed silently under his breath. Finally they made it to the top, and stood victoriously before apartment four. “And behind door number one…” said Vee in his best game show host voice. He patted a light drum roll on the railing behind them while Phillip unlocked the door. The deadbolt shifted with a heavy click. The unremarkable door slid silently open, revealing within… An unremarkable apartment. The carpet was cheap but clean, close to the same color as the outside of the building. The walls were painted a boring shade of beige, though the job appeared to have been rushed, as dried rivulets could be seen in patches. “First impressions?” Phillip asked, turning around. Vee shrugged. “For the asking price, I can’t necessarily say I’m surprised.” They took a few steps into the small living room. To their left was an entrance into a tiny kitchenette. Peeking in, their
hearts sank. Wedged between a four burner gas stove and a single basin sink was about a foot of counter space. The cabinets had been recently painted in a different shade of beige, noticeably contrasting with the walls. Vee reached out and tried to open one of them, but the thick coat of paint had caked the door shut. Phillip was looking
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“It’s the height of space heating technology.” He responded sarcastically, looking around. “I guess this is the bedroom?” Vee nodded, opening the single door. “It has an attached bathroom.” The space was little larger than the closet, with barely any room to maneuver between the sink, toilet, and tub.
out of a small window which offered a rather uninspiring view of the road below. Like the cabinets, the window had also been painted shut. “We could probably just cut through the seal.” Vee suggested. Phillip glanced over with a hybrid smile-grimace that told Vee his interest in the unit was quickly waning.
“Thoughts?” Phillip asked, stepping over to a window in the main room. Through a slit in the blinds he could see across the street into the empty playground of an elementary school. “I’m going to have to vote ‘no’ on this one.” Vee said, taking a closer look into the bathroom. The caulking around the tub was unspeakable. “Not mentioning… basically
Opposite the front door was another large opening, leading into a room with a closet and another door. In the corner, with stop-pipe leading into the ceiling, was what appeared to be a gas heater, complete with push-bikes electric start. “That’s… neat.” Vee commented, shooting Phillip a sly smile.
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everything else, I don’t want to deal with hauling our couch up those stairs.”
up, he raised an eyebrow. It was outside the city. Not far, but he was still surprised.
Phillip nodded. “Fair enough. I would have also accepted the giant heater.” They smiled at each other.
“Really?”
“Shall we?” he motioned toward the door. “Let’s.” *** “Where’s the next one?” Vee asked, once they were back in the truck. Phillip rattled off an address, and Vee punched it in. Taking a look at the map it brought
In response, Phillip only smiled. The property wound up being a large farmhouse, just outside the city along a quiet stretch of highway. They stood in the driveway, looking up at the house. It was two stories tall and seemed very well maintained. The windows looked new, and the outside paneling was painted a bright white with black trim and a single stall garage tucked around the corner. It was the quintessence of Iowa farmhouse.
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“There’s absolutely no way this is in our price range.” Vee remarked, looking up, somewhat agape, at the house. “It’s in the upper limits, but yeah! Completely affordable.” Phillip smiled. “And from the pictures, it’s beautiful inside.” “Well. Guess we’d better take a look.” The front door led into a small entryway or mudroom. From there, an open doorway gave access to a large, open, country-style kitchen. The floor was black and white tiled linoleum. All of the appliances were stainless steel and looked brand new. Over the sink was a large picture window, with a view of the backyard. Vee stood in the middle of the room, turning around and around, taking it all in. He was a sucker for a great kitchen. “It’s huge!” Phillip laughed. “I thought you might like it. Wanna check out the rest of the place, or just call it here?” “Let’s see what else she’s got.” The kitchen opened up into a small, almost perfectly square dining room with a halfbath off the side. Two doorways led into a living room, with a set of stairs leading to the next floor. Another large window looked out across the front yard, toward the driveway.
One of the hardest parts of viewing prospective properties for Vee was imagining where their furniture would go. It wasn’t a logistical issue, it was just difficult for him to picture the room put together with their stuff. When Phillip suggested a particular arrangement, he usually just agreed. “The bedrooms are upstairs?” Phillip nodded, “Three bedrooms and two baths.” “Three bedrooms? What are we going to do with three bedrooms?” Phillip shrugged. “I’m sure we’ll find something to do with them.” Vee motioned toward the stairs, “Lead the way.” The carpeting of the living room stretched up the stairs and covered the hallway. Three doors branched off—one on the right, two on the left. The first door to the left led to an empty room, three large windows opposite the door, and another door to the right. The floor was the same hardwood as the dining room. “No closet?” Vee asked, after finding a bathroom through the door. “I think it’s supposed to be more of an office,” Phillip replied.
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The bathroom had another door on the opposite side, leading to another bedroom. This one was slightly larger with the carpeting making a return. The windows looked out to the side, giving a view of freshly planted fields. They left through the door to the hallway. Phillip paused before opening the third door. “So this is the master bedroom?” Phillip nodded, his hand on the knob. “I just want you to know, I’m super excited about this place.” “I can tell,” Vee smiled. “It seems nice.” Phillip nodded his agreement, and opened the door.
The master bedroom was large and once again hardwood. A large picture window looked out over the front yard. The view wasn’t the prettiest, but most definitely Iowan. Fields with furrowed mounds as far as the eye could see. Two closed doors were on the far side of the room, one to a walk-in closet, the other to the master bath. “This place is amazing!” Vee exclaimed, laughing. “What’s the catch? Is it a crime scene? Haunted? Built over an Indian graveyard?” Phillip laughed, and shook his head. “Nope. I’m guessing it could be hard to
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heat? But the realty place said it has a new heater and central air. Oh, and all the yard work is our responsibility, except plowing the driveway. Guess they’ve got a contract with a company in town somewhere.” “Ah. I guess mowing the lawn isn’t the worst thing.” Vee said, turning to look out the window. He’d grown up in a place similar to the house, surrounded by nothing but fields for miles. He hadn’t been a fan of it at the time. He shot a sideways glance towards Phillip. The company was certainly preferable to his childhood home. He wrapped an arm around Phillip. “Guess we should fill out the application, then.”
The first week at the farmhouse passed without any difficulties. Unpacking went well, though the amount of possessions they owned seemed disproportionately scant inside the incredible space they now possessed. Phillip only took a wrong turn once, heading back to Main Street after work. Things were shaping up nicely. The best part was that they were both very happy. After their first post-unpacking relaxation weekend, Vee was all smiles as Phillip drove him to work. Pulling into the parking lot, they were met with the sight of a large crowd gathered around the main entrance. Judging by their clothes, they were all regular hourly folks like Vee himself. “What in the…” Phillip’s voice trailed off. “I have no idea,” replied Vee, unbuckling his seatbelt, “I’ll shoot you a text when I know what’s going on.”
They received word a few days later that their application had been processed. They signed the lease, paid the security deposit and first month’s rent immediately. They finished packing, and said their goodbyes to the apartment in Main Street.
They kissed goodbye, and Vee watched the white truck pull out of the parking lot and disappear around a corner. With a mounting sense of confusion and dread, he made his way into the throng. The word-of-mouth message being passed around was that of a ‘mandatory
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meeting’ with some of the higher-ups. Vee took a deep breath, and tried to calm himself. In his experience, mandatory unscheduled meetings were rarely a good thing. A group of formally dressed men emerged from the building. A few of them Vee recognized from day-to-day interactions around the factory. The expressions on their faces were not good omen. The others, new faces Vee had never seen, hid behind false, mannequin fresh smiles. Though the words were formal and polite, the message they conveyed was not. The company had been bought out. The new owners were rearranging the business
model. Mass layoffs, save for a few people being retained to finish existing orders. Vee didn’t make the cut. While others were yelling, grumbling, pleading, Vee turned and left. There wasn’t anything more to do. He sat down outside and stared at his phone, an empty text with Phillip’s name at the top. He wasn’t shocked that he’d lost his job. He wasn’t angry that the benefits he’d worked so hard for were gone. There was only one thought on Vee’s mind, loud and clear. How was he going to tell Phillip?
by Jeremy Stough
Come see us at Crescent, where you're a person, not just a patient.
www.CrescentCHC.org 1789 Elm Street Suite A Dubuque, IA 52001 563.690.2850
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SOCIAL SUPPORT SYSTEMS
TRANSCEND
TRANSCEND SECTION
by Ora Uzel
A
t the beginning of 2015, I was living in Michigan, living and working at a place where the owner, my boss and landlord, largely dominated my life. I was on call 24/7/365 at a seasonal business that left me unemployed but still on call in winter. I had almost no life that wasn’t online, and I sat alone in a remote farmhouse when I wasn’t working. Then I started going to an LGBTQ+ support group. Shortly after that, I also found a therapist. This was the first time I’d been to a therapist in 9 years since I transitioned in Chicago. This therapist helped me see my situation, that this one person was controlling my life and leaving with me with little to no options for social support as a result. I needed to get out, and most of all I needed a strong social support system. By the end of 2015, I moved to Dubuque to live with my parents (student loans, healthcare debt, etc.). Finding myself
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back in the town that was host to the worst years of my childhood and endless teasing in elementary school, I offered the city redemption. I had to this if I was to build a social support system in this town. I use what I like to call the “friend zero” method. Just like those movies where a plague breaks out and there’s a “patient zero,” “friend zero” is a starter person who introduces you to a few more people, and then you branch out from there. You stick with the people you most resonate with or connect with and keep the rest as acquaintances with the possibility of further friendship down the line, or possibly even business networking connections. Listening is key. But just making friends doesn’t always work as the only method to build a social support system, especially for people
who are not neurotypical (people with no mental health condition). I had congenital depression that has been heavily exacerbated ever since I realized I was transgender at age 13 – It’s important to note that many of the mental health issues transgender people suffer are secondary conditions exacerbated by the way society treats transgender people. They are conditions that might not manifest in a society that treats transgender people equitably. – But I knew I needed a therapist. Even before I met “friend zero,” I began with my current therapist on a weekly basis. Though she had no experience with transgender patients, she’s been great for me. The roughest times in my life have been characterized by a general lack of social support. And the good times saw an abundance of both friendships and counseling. Moreover, when we go through transition, a social support system is more important than ever. We’re vulnerable, often going through hormonal changes and trying to find our new way in this world while being our truest selves. This is no small task when gender norms can be an obstacle with every social interaction you have.
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Also, sometimes people will leave when you transition. Not everyone is ready to be there alongside you as your life changes drastically from one situation to the next and as you bear the emotional lashings society can dish out to transgender people. Some may leave. Others may stay. Some may distance themselves. Some may want to get closer. As we navigate the variety of people’s reactions to our true selves, it’s important to remember that, in their small way, they are also transitioning with us. It’s good to have patience and not burn bridges. Of course it’s also equally important to honor yourself. Having a large robust social support system will help you determine who can support you best and who cannot. Keep your social support system strong, and when transitioning, be active in making it stronger.
As you step into a new situation of physical health with your transition, you’re also stepping into a new situation of mental health. While much of it is wonderful being your new truest self, it can be volatile in the beginning. Maintaining a friend network, getting therapy, being active in organizations, and other social activities can help soften the social challenges of transition. You don’t have to do this alone. End Note: If you need to reach out specifically to a transgender person, there is the national Trans Lifeline at www.translifeline.org or call them at: 877-565-8860. Put the number in your phone now, so you have it when you need it. Plan ahead.
All of this can help you have a mentally healthier and happier transition -- or a healthier and happier life even if you’re not transgender or not transitioning -- with fewer emotional or social swings and dips into dangerous territory, whether you’re dealing with a tendency to find yourself around dangerous people or you’re dealing with a tendency to isolate and hurt yourself.
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PEACE & JUSTICE
Reject H
Rememberin Moving Forw 42 Co-ZINE | www.cozinemagazine.com
Dubuquers march in remembrance of Orlando’s 2016 shooting on its one year anniversary, June 12.
Hatred:
ng Tragedy & ward Together
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Reject Hatred!: The Fight for Love and Justice in 2017
A
t 2:00AM on June 12 of 2016, Omar Mateen walked into Pulse, an LGBT nightclub in Orlando, Florida with two guns and shot more than one hundred people. The mass murder was premeditated: in the weeks leading up to the shooting, he purchased weapons, attempted to purchase protective equipment, and sold his share of a house to his sister for $10.
It was Pride Month, and at Pulse, it was Latin night. Mateen was a self-proclaimed terrorist, shooting in direct response to recent US actions in Iraq. After shots were fired, 58 people were injured, and 50 died, including the shooter himself. While Mateen’s attack on Pulse was the deadliest terrorist attack in the US in
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almost 20 years, it was also a hate crime. Unfortunately, it is far from being a standalone tragedy. Members of minority communities in the US, including LGBTQ+ individuals, continue to be disproportionately affected by violence and hate crimes.
While June is Pride Month every year, this June was a somber time of remembrance. The 12th marked one year since the Orlando shootings. Major cases regarding discrimination against minority communities were wrapped up: Philando Castile’s family reached a settlement with St. Anthony, Minnesota while the officer who shot him was acquitted of all charges.
While black males only make up 6% of the US population, they account for 34% of the unarmed people killed by police in 2016. These unnecessary and unlawful killings led to the foundation of the Black Lives Matter movement and public responses like #sayhername and #sayhisname. Since Michael Brown’s family reached a settle2017 began, at least 15 transgender women ment with Ferguson and Tamir Rice’s family with Cleveland. of color were victims of homicide.
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L
egislators across the country continue to attack women’s reproductive rights, and transgender rights. According to americanprogress.org, the proposed health care bill (American Health Care Act) “would undo [the gains made through the ACA (Affordable Care Act)] and hurt LGBT people, their families, and their neighbors.”
ranges are uninsured in 2017, compared to 7 percent of non-LGBT Americans,” and statistics are even grimmer for people who make less than $45,000 a year.
The AHCA would also be detrimental to women’s health, because its pre-existing conditions clause include conditions mostly, and sometimes exclusively, expeThis is because “LGBT, communities rienced by women, like Caesarian sections have often experienced high rates of and sexual assault. uninsurance and barriers to coverage and care, such as discrimination on the basis of gender identity and sexual orientation. Under the GOP’s would-be law, these A new study by the Center for American would be sound legal reasons to deny insurProgress, or CAP, finds that 15 percent ance coverage to a person. The AHCA is of LGBT Americans across all income just one example of this kind of predatory
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legislation. It would seem that these dark times for America’s systemically oppressed are growing darker. On June 12th in Dubuque, local members of the LGBTQ+ community marched in remembrance of the Orlando shooting. Passersby honked and waved and shouted words of support. However, it is very important to remember Orlando was not a standalone tragedy, and especially that not all tragedies are born from physical violence. It’s also very important that true activism doesn’t end after an hour of remembrance – it keeps up with current events, it calls its lawmakers and makes its voice heard, even in the face of fatigue and adversity: the Castile family couldn’t switch off the news of Philando’s death when it wore them out. The catalysts for change are community, support, and persistence.
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What’s in y Aquarius
Aries
Gemini
What on earth is happening? This is a year of resilience and perseverance. Keep your eye on the prize and you will and achieve what you hope to achieve.
You good, boo boo. You are doing your thing, strutting your stuff. You keep doing you. People see it, and it is quite impressive.
Twinsies, jinx! It’s okay to have agendas, but trying to keep a dual agenda can be questionable... Especially when others notice that you have two, not just one.
Pisces
Taurus
Cancer
Take a deep breath and remember those who are helping you. They are truly there for you. Be good and stay positive. It is crucial.
Maybe one day you can venture forward and make life better than it already is. Hope is never far away if it is what you seek. Take action.
It’ll be good. Keep feeling those emotions. Make sense of them. You’ll get it eventually and make it work for you. You already know you can cope - you can retry, too.
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your stars? Leo
Libra
Sagittarius
A bad hair day does happen every now and then. A shower and gel will fix that right up. Unless you got that hairspray. Some wonders can be done with a good can of spray.
Fun, fun and more fun is what you like and you are living it up. Keep enjoying the day and make memories last. Take pictures.
Not sure what you are doing? Do you miss what was? It’s confusing and can be quite hurtful. Don’t play with those who will do anything for you.
Virgo
Scorpio
Capricorn
Please help those around you and don’t get stuck in your head. People need a leader and you have the right qualities. Make them proud. They need you.
How does one cope if they don’t have time to think about it? Start grounding yourself. The fun and games all have their place, but avoiding responsibilities catches up.
Work pays off if you actually do it. Don’t be lazy and don’t make others pay your way. The most attractive qualities are confidence and independence.
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