City Weekly June 14, 2018

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CWCONTENTS COVER STORY THIS VAN’S A-ROCKIN’

… and you will too by the time you’re done with this issue.

Cover by Ryan Williamson and Enrique Limón

23

CONTRIBUTOR JORDAN FLOYD

4 LETTERS 6 OPINION 12 NEWS 14 A&E 18 DINE 47 CINEMA 49 MUSIC 60 COMMUNITY

Summer Fests Preview This writer, stalwart Directioner (yes, still) and Stevie Nicks fanatic’s life was changed at age 10 when he saw footage of Billie Joe Armstrong flashing his bare ass during a U.K. show. When he’s not crying to the tune of “Landslide,” he’s crying to The Cranberries’ “Dreams.” Above all, he believes few things are better than the Dixie Chicks paired with a sixer of Keystone Light.

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Panelists spar over Medicaid expansion. facebook.com/slcweekly

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Ocean’s 8 falls flat.

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BOOKS ´ EVENTS ´ CLUBS

SOAP BOX

OGDEN’S BOOKSTORE COMMENTS@CITYWEEKLY.NET Supporting authors from @SLCWEEKLY “shithole” countries @CITYWEEKLY @SLCWEEKLY

Cover story, May 31, “Hello, Jason!”

He’s fabulous!

SUSAN BALLARD

bookedon25th.com 801-394-4891

147 Historic 25th Street Ogden, UT

Via Facebook Such a good article. Congratulations, you’re amazing!

@STEVENBROWN33 Via Instagram Love, love, love this!

@JAYLEENEDESERAE Via Instagram Rad.

@CALICOTHEBAND Via Instagram You’re [sic] story about Jason CoZmo is garbage. That is not local drag. That is not the definition of local drag. That is expensive drag that does not celebrate the diversity of drag performers and style; the interview coming from a person with [an] over-inflated ego who only sees dollar signs when it comes to drag. It is professional drag for money, not for expression, not for [its] viewers, not for the LGBT community. It gives a very narrow view of drag shows and just promotes the misunderstandings and cliché expectations of what drag is. There are a lot of performers hurt over your article. Word of mouth can really hurt people, and I’ll see to it that it hurts you. You want local drag, come to a Provo show like a Divine Sister Misters or Glamateur Hour and see what we do, see what drag can be and really is. If you insist on limiting yourselves to SLC, go to [an] Operation Gender Juice show, a Forbidden Fruits show, a Moth Closet show. I’m not a verbally kind person, it’s taken a lot not to be more hostile.

Many friends and family members are readers, I’ll make sure they aren’t anymore and make sure they spread the word, too.

I myself will never look at or pick up another issue.

LILITH ZIZA ORESA, Provo

Jason CoZmo responds: First, let me tell you I am a fourth generation Utah local, born and raised in Magna. The article I was featured in covered that. I employ 6-8 local drag queens every weekend to a sold-out crowd of, again, local patrons.

When I lived away from Utah, I regularly traveled back here to do shows and this is how I developed a fan base.

Moving on. Yes, my costumes are expensive. No one has ever handed me anything. My drag is an accumulation of the years I have worked all over the country and I have handmade and/ or paid for everything myself. I take great pride in my drag, and it shows. I learned long ago to make smart investments when it comes to my drag closet. It is, at the end of the day, how I make a living. As my biggest inspiration Dolly Parton said, “It costs a lot of money to look this cheap”—and she wasn’t lying.

To be clear, there is no “narrow view” that stems from our show. We bring in the most diverse audience of any show here in Utah, more so than most theater companies. And just because Salt Lake City Weekly chose to feature me on their Pride issue cover—when other LGBTQ magazines featured outof-town talent that had nothing to do with our community—this doesn’t mean CW doesn’t support other local queens. Many queens have an issue with me saying “I made new local queens” in the article. In response, I have made new local queens. I have hired local performers in my show with zero background in drag and have trained them to shine onstage.

I’ve hired queens who have felt rejected and outcast by their drag families, and I have given them a home and a safe space to feel accepted. Please tell me how that is a bad thing?

This show has done so much good for not only the LGBTQ community, but also for our straight allies. Our doors are open to anyone who wants to attend, as long as you’re re-

spectful. If you don’t want to attend, please don’t disparage those who do. We are all different, and that is what makes us all so beautiful. Maybe stop hiding behind a screen while tearing down others, and instead start a small business of your own, run for office or donate to a charitable cause?

Stop belittling those that are making progressive change in Utah. It’s time for this Utah queer community to grow up and start fighting the real enemies in our state, not the local business owners who have done nothing but build positive change.

Private Eye, May 31, “Stay Proud”

Oh, John, what a great piece on our own local Roseanne Barr. I knew about her sister but this is the first I’ve heard of her brother. It’s good to know that sometimes the times are a changin’ for the better. Also, love the cover pic on this week’s CW!

LORNA HARDY, Millcreek City

John, you and I were blocked the same day by Roseanne. I remember the exchange well. It was over global warming, haha.

@THEJAZZYUTE Via Twitter

Online news post, June 6, “The Man, the Mitt, the Legend”

“Wholesome” has a whole different meaning when it oozes from a venture capitalist’s speech organ.

@CHANCES_HUMAN Via Twitter

I think he means, “Let’s bring another plethora of call centers and fulfillment centers to Utah so the young people who work there can build up enough tolerance and resilience to enjoy being harassed by customers every day all while having to work overtime to be able to pay their rents.”

MATT MORRIS Via Facebook

Then kill them with ozone and air particulates before 65 so we don’t have to pay out.

PETER MUSCARELLO Via Facebook Mitt is such a tool.

LYN ROBISON

Via cityweekly.net We encourage you to join the conversation. Sound off across our social media channels as well as on cityweekly.net for a chance to be featured in this section.

STAFF Publisher JOHN SALTAS

Contributors CECIL ADAMS, KATHARINE BIELE, ROB BREZSNY, BABS DE LAY, KYLEE EHMANN, JORDAN FLOYD, HOWARD HARDEE, MARYANN JOHANSON, KEITH L. McDONALD, ROBBY POFFENBERGER, DAVID RIEDEL, MIKE RIEDEL, MICHAEL S. ROBINSON SR., ERIC D. SNIDER, ALEX SPRINGER, LEE ZIMMERMAN

Salt Lake City Weekly is published every Thursday by Copperfield Publishing Inc. The Salt Lake City Weekly is an independent publication dedicated to alternative news and news sources, and serves as a comprehensive entertainment guide. 50,000 copies of the Salt Lake City Weekly are free of charge at more than 1,800 locations along the Wasatch Front, limit one copy per reader. Additional copies of the paper may be purchased for $1 (Best of Utah and other special issues, $5) payable to the Salt Lake City Weekly in advance. No person, without expressed permission of Copperfield Publishing Inc., may take more than one copy of any Salt Lake City Weekly issue.

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OPINION

On Religious Discrimination

It wasn’t long ago that English kings, among others, were God’s own anointed protectors of the faith, assuming the roles of political leader and religious pontiff combined. Well, folks, state religion is alive and well in Utah, defined and implemented as prejudicial treatment of non-Mormons. And it isn’t just social, it’s economic as well. Here’s a little background: When I was a teenager, my Swedish immigrant grandmother told me about her own childhood, and how Sweden had an official state religion. In 1593, the Convocation of Uppsala made the Evangelical-Lutheran Faith the only religious denomination recognized by the Swedish government. Later, its official name was changed to the Church of Sweden, with the King and Queen at its head.

Grandma Olga told me that the state religion had been involved in legislation and the courts, and that dissenting religious views were actually criminalized and severely punished.

On the other hand, loyal church members received favorable tax status and other financial perks. I was flabbergasted; separation of church and state was a staple of my beliefs—though I had been aware that other countries had followed different paths.

After centuries of its official state religion, and swept up in the growing trend of secularism, Sweden eventually developed tolerance for non-members. That transition continued.

In 1951, Sweden passed the “Religious Freedom Act,” which made it legal for citizens to leave the church, and, in 2000, Sweden severed the official ties that tethered church and state.

As Americans, the separation of religion and government is

BY MICHAEL S. ROBINSON SR. a fundamental belief. Those who attempted to create theocracies, including Mormondom’s Brigham Young and others, were thwarted by the broad understanding that, though not actually stated in the Constitution, the mere presence of a government-favored faith constitutes religious prejudice. Young envisioned the State of Deseret, which would have encompassed what is now Utah, along with parts of Nevada, California, Colorado, Arizona, Oregon, Wyoming and Idaho. The sovereign territory was to have been, essentially, governed by the Mormon church. Young’s plan failed after only a year, when multiple petitions were unsuccessful in finding favor with the federal government.

Historically, religions have used a variety of devices to persecute those who don’t share the faith, and Mormon-led politics has been guilty of favoring its own while marginalizing and penalizing so-called “gentiles.” There are many examples of this, but, perhaps the best is the Utah Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control. Drawn as a highly visible line in the sand, the use of alcoholic beverages has been used, effectively, to warrant special taxation of non-Mormons, and, indirectly to lighten the financial load of the faithful.

The DABC, in a direct affront to the principle that government should be restricted to serving its citizens, has instead engaged in a state-run competition to legitimate private enterprise. While the imposition of so-called “sin taxes” is not confined to our state, one can’t help but ask the question: Why is our government in the liquor business, when that is something legitimately left to private enterprise? It is one thing to create health-related taxes on liquor and to properly regulate that business, just as any other; but it’s a very different thing to actually be in the business of buying and selling a commodity that Mormon doctrine forbids to its followers.

Along with its incursion into private enterprise, and directly in violation of the principle of competition, the DABC gouges buyers with prices that are as much as 100 percent higher

than liquor in surrounding states. It’s perfectly understandable that, in violation of Utah law, thousands of Utahns flock to neighboring states where they can purchase their booze at competitive prices. When you think about it, this mini-rebellion is not so different than the Boston Tea Party. (I know, it’s about prices, not taxes, but the effect is still the same.) A Utahn with a trunk-load of bottles can be stopped, arrested, his contraband taken, and incarcerated, just because he rebelled against the predatory, extortionary pricing of Utah liquor.

Since Utah is one of the biggest—if not the biggest—purchasers of wholesale booze, another question comes up: What does the state do with the $100-million annual profit that is now generated by gouging the religious underdogs? With the Mormon belief that they should have as many babies as possible to house the spirits of people who are yet premortal, it’s no surprise that Utahns have some of the highest birthrates and largest families in America. So it is the ill-gotten gains from the DABC’s prejudicial anti-gentile model that are then used to supplement the state’s general fund, and help support the sorely underfunded public schools, flooded with the children that the non-Mormons elected not to have. Then, when April 15 rolls around each year, secular Utahns subsidize their Mormon counterparts because children are a substantial tax deduction.

What’s the matter with this picture? In a country where religious discrimination is an absolute no-no, the concept of an official state religion is very much alive. Mormons, as patriotic Americans, should be equally interested in doing away with this biased system.

This is America, for heaven’s sake, so Utah needs to start living by the precepts of the founding fathers. Utah still promotes pure-and-simple religious discrimination through its DABC, and that needs to go. CW Send feedback to comments@cityweekly.net

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HITS&MISSES

BY KATHARINE BIELE

FIVE SPOT

RANDOM QUESTIONS, SURPRISING ANSWERS WITH MISS CITY WEEKLY 2018

@kathybiele

The Polluting Port

The Utah Supreme Court was right—it’s not about you; it’s about us. That’s “us” in the metaphorical sense. The court recently denied the Keep Their Voice, oops, Keep My Voice proponents’ effort to overturn a legislative mandate giving candidates a dual path to the ballot. Who cares about this?

Only the whichever-party elite who commonly come out on caucus night to stack the deck with fringe candidates. As The Salt Lake Tribune reported, the issue was actually about democracy—giving people a fair and balanced way to express their “preferences and values in a democratic fashion.” KMV supporters thought it was their right to associate in a small, closed group. Don Guymon of the GOP Central Committee thinks the U.S. Supreme Court should weigh in because of an odd dissent

by Chief Judge Timothy Tymkovich. But the rest of the court said this: “Not only does this balance not offend our Constitution, it is at its very essence.”

Not That Questar

Kids, this is Utah, where education funding is negligible, home schooling is aspirational and testing changes almost yearly. Get ready ’cuz there’s more coming. The Utah Board of Education is about to dump SAGE. And they will opt into something from, well, Questar? No, not that one—Questar Assessment Inc., a big for-profit subsidiary of Educational Testing Service that’s going to make a lot of money off you. Just a few months ago, the board toyed with risking $123 million in federal funds because they don’t like the feds telling them anything. The Salt Lake Tribune notes that 6 percent of students opt out of SAGE testing anyway. Well, didn’t the president just say you don’t need to prepare? So now Utah’s going all tech-savvy, despite computer glitches in some states and even a data breach.

IN ONE WEEK, YOU CAN CHANGE THE WORLD

INLAND PORT PROTEST

STEVE CONLIN

Dear Speaker Greg Hughes, the title of Supreme Leader in Chief has been reserved for Mr. Trump. We understand that you have this deeply held belief that states’ rights means it’s your right, and the game is locked. Surprise. You are not the only one with a vision for Utah’s future.

Remember, uh, the people? They do not seem happy. The Inland Port, nicknamed the Polluting Port, has not only Salt Lake City up in arms, but those dreaded but oftignored “enviros.” Of course, businesses are all abuzz. The Daily Herald covered a panel of development cheerleaders, including Envision Utah, whose vision of global connectivity neatly bypasses concerns over water and air. Meanwhile, Sen. Jim Dabakis is tiptoeing into the fray because it’s a done deal, The Salt Lake Tribune reported. There’s no end to hubris.

Keep Their Voice

CITIZEN REV LT

It wasn’t E. Cooper Jr’s first rodeo when he took the Miss City Weekly stage late last month at Metro Music Hall. A certain magic was in the air when, for the talent portion, he decided to sing the showstopper “This Is Me” live in front of the packed house. Simultaneously vulnerable and empowering, Cooper brought the house down and snatched the crown. Here he reflects on his drag origins, and how to unite the LGBTQ community.

How did your drag career start?

“It all started as kind of a fluke. I became good friends with the queens at Try-Angles. One day about three years ago, they asked me if would sing a gospel song in drag. I initially said no. The thought of donning makeup and a dress seemed so foreign to me. Eventually, I went out and found a dress at Goodwill, some boots and some makeup from Walgreens.

I’ll never forget standing in that mirror not knowing what to do, hyperventilating over the fact that I was getting in drag for the first time! That’s when the sisterhood kicked in. Each sister took a portion of my face, helped me get dressed, and cheered me on. When I hit the stage, stockings rolling down my legs, I belted out one of favorite gospel tunes. I knew that the stage was where I was meant to be.”

When did drag transform from a curiosity into something you wanted to pursue more seriously?

“For the first year and a half, it was a hobby. Then I met Jason CoZmo and began working with Viva La Diva. I was introduced to new audiences and started making new connections all over the country. Suddenly, I found that my drag was changing and becoming more refined. I started to look at the business and impact of what I was doing. This last year has all been about honing the craft and creating my brand among the others I work with. It definitely is growing into a career.”

What have been some of your most unforgettable onstage moments?

“This Pride definitely takes the cake; having the opportunity to sing one of my favorite songs at the Miss City Weekly pageant this year was a dream come true. Singing has always been my first passion. Being able to repeat the performance at the Pride Festival was also amazing. I wasn’t prepared for the feedback from the youth. There were tears, there were confessions of being in dark places, there was so much love. I was filled with a sense of accomplishment in that moment.”

There seems to be an inherent divisiveness among some elements of the local LGBTQ community. What is your message to them?

“As a black man from the South, I grew up with the stories of racism and hatred from the outside world. I was also keen to hatred in our world: being too dark, hair too kinky. It made the whole struggle even harder to overcome, because everyone tried to climb on everyone else to make it out. I feel it happen a lot within our community. When we feel our worth is not being recognized, we fight against whatever is seemingly in our way. Unfortunately, at times it’s our own sisters and brothers. We need to squash the hate inside our communities and find common ground to stand on. Forgive grievances, and build lasting relationships. It is only going to make us all better in the end.”

—SCOTT RENSHAW scottr@cityweekly.net

Here’s a chance to stick it to “the man.”

The secretive Inland Port Authority will hold its first meeting, and still has no plans to engage the public. “Ever since the bill creating the port authority was passed in the last hours of the legislative session without public debate—they’ve been keeping us out of the conversation,” the event’s Facebook page says.

The plan, fashioned in the final hours of the legislative session, took authority away from Salt Lake City and leaves the fragile lands around the Great Salt Lake in jeopardy. Then there’s the traffic, air pollution and other problems that accompany a huge trucking center. This is the worst example of governing by fiat. Say “NO” to a polluting SLC Inland Port! Utah Capitol, 350 N. State, 801-803-9882, Monday, June 18, 810 a.m., free, bit.ly/2HtNmTL.

ANSWERING HUNGER

Make Hunger Visible will be talking with representatives of the LDS Church about What Services Are Available at Welfare Square? All clients and volunteers of Crossroads Urban Center should come to this discussion and have their questions answered. Utah has an overall food-insecurity rate of 11.9 percent—this statistic looks at all households. Utah has a childhood food-insecurity rate of 20.4 percent, which just accounts for the households with children, according to the USDA and the 2010 U.S. Census.

Crossroads Urban Center, 347 S. 400 East, 801-364-7765, Tuesday, June 19, 5:30-6:30 p.m., free, bit.ly/2xX XHI8.

EDUCATION ADVOCACY AT INTERIM SESSION

The Legislature’s Interim Session is often where things happen—with or without you. This month, you can learn how to take part in education advocacy and how state policy issues can affect you and your community. “Hear from educators, legislators and Action Utah leaders about education policy issues and how to advocate for your needs in education as a parent, teacher or concerned Utahn,” according to the event’s website. There will be a Capitol tour at this Interim Session Tour of the State Capitol: Education Advocacy, and you can attend some public committee hearings that run from 8:30 a.m.4:15 p.m. Utah Capitol, 350 N. State, Senate Building cafeteria, Wednesday, June 20, noon-1 p.m., free/registration required, bit.ly/2sSdFxs.

—KATHARINE BIELE Send tips to revolt@cityweekly.net

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JUNE 14, 2018 | 9

Why aren’t there flea collars for people? I see ads for all kinds of products to protect pets from fleas and ticks, and nasty tick-borne diseases are becoming more common. I’m tired of having to strip and do an extensive tick check after every walk in the woods.

—Bill Costa

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BY CECIL ADAMS SLUG SIGNORINO

STRAIGHT DOPE Tick Check

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Consider the dog, Bill, and how it lives.

It sheds and slobbers. It dwells close to the ground. It doesn’t shower much. It rolls around in dirt, and will happily do the same in feces or rotting animal remains where available. Let’s just say if your personal habits depart much from the aforementioned, you might not really need flea control of any sort. Particularly in developed countries, modern hygiene has rendered fleas pretty much a medical nonissue. Where they remain a problem (e.g. in sub-Saharan Africa) it’s often because they burrow into the feet and hands—more easily countered with a pesticide wash than with dedicated neckwear.

But let’s separate the fleas from the ticks here, and the havoc-wreaking potential of each. Granted, fleas have run up a more impressive score if you take the historical view—they carried bubonic plague, after all. But while we’ve got plague all but under control these days, one can’t say the same about the infectious diseases passed along by ticks, which as you note present increasingly grave threats to human health.

Blame climate change in part, as more regions become warm and humid enough to support tick activity; Growing populations of deer and mice that carry ticks are playing a role too. The major Lyme-spreading tick was found in just 30 percent of American counties in 1998, but nearly 50 percent by 2016. Last month, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention welcomed summer by announcing a three-fold increase in the number of people infected with vectorborne diseases—vectors here being ticks, mosquitoes, and their colleagues—between 2004 and 2016, noting that publichealth bodies are woefully underprepared for the growing epidemiological menace.

Conditions spread by ticks constitute a small rogues’ gallery of disease, including low-profile up-and-comers like babesiosis and old favorites like Rocky Mountain spotted fever. But Lyme disease remains the biggest vector-borne game in town: some 30,000 cases are reported every year in the U.S., and studies estimate the actual number is 10 times that. If you don’t catch it early, long-term Lyme symptoms include arthritic joint pain, brain inflammation, and facial palsy.

And it’s true: dogs do enjoy better protection against Lyme than we do, thanks to readily available vaccination. Why no equivalent for dog’s best friend? In fact, a safe, largely effective Lyme vaccine was cleared for use 20 years ago—and disappeared shortly thereafter.

Lymerix, as it was called, had the misfortune of showing up at a crucial juncture of

the anti-vax era—i.e., shortly after the 1998 publication of the infamous (and since retracted) report in the Lancet falsely linking the measles-mumps-rubella vaccine with autism. That year, during the FDA approval process for Lymerix, some members of the reviewing panel expressed concerns the vaccine could theoretically trigger an immune response leading to arthritis. The drug having tested safe in clinical trials and this risk being, again, purely hypothetical, the panel approved it unanimously.

Word got out, though, to a public then in its first flush of vaccine panic. Soon enough, news reports were linking Lymerix to isolated cases of fever and joint pain, and sales of the product fell through the floor. A 2007 study found no increased incidence of arthritis in vaccine recipients, but the Lymerix ship had long since sailed: facing lawsuits and turning relatively little profit, its manufacturer pulled it off the market in 2002.

(Other factors that probably didn’t help its chances: the vaccine was expensive, and even after the 12-month, three-shot regimen required for full protection you still had a non-negligible 20 percent chance of remaining susceptible to Lyme disease anyway.)

Where’s that leave us? A French company is developing a Lyme vaccine that might provide even better protection, though its CEO acknowledges it will be “hard to convince anti-vax lobbyists,” and the drug’s years away from public release regardless.

And while Lyme might be the worst tickborne offender out there, it might not hold that title for long: meet the Powassan virus, currently still rare but on the rise in the Northeast. Yale epidemiologist Durland Fish wrote recently that Powassan “could surpass Lyme disease in its impact upon public health”: infection leads to encephalitis, causing fatality in 10 percent of cases and permanent brain damage in fully half. There’s no vaccine for this one either, though in Europe they’re vaccinating against a similar form of encephalitis, so we’ve at least got a starting place.

But you might as well get used to those full-body tick checks, Bill. One worries any sensible prophylactic treatment could meet its match in a vaccine-wary American populace, just as Lyme vaccine did and might again. You can wear bug spray, tall socks, and long sleeves, but, as they say, there’s no cure for stupid. n

Send questions via straightdope.com or write c/o Chicago Reader, 30 N. Racine, Ste. 300, Chicago, Ill., 60607.

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JUNE 14, 2018 | 11

HOMELESSNESS

Road Dread

As panhandlers adjust to new rules, a state lawmaker and cops say measures have made streets safer.

BY KELAN LYONS klyons@cityweekly.net @kelan_lyons

M

artin’s been working the same spot for eight years. So long, in fact, he’s got a few “regulars.” His hat and sunglasses partially obscure an otherwise friendly face, but whether it’s the salt-andpepper-stubble-surrounded smile or the handful of cardboard signs he uses to explain his situation—displaying something along the lines of, “Homeless, Hungry + Broke Please Help Thank You So Much God Bless”—some drivers routinely throw Martin cash as they’re exiting onto 700 East from Interstate 80. Literally, throw.

“I tell my regulars to do that, so that way none of us get in trouble,” Martin, who lives under a bridge near the intersection, says. If he spots a patrol car, he puts his sign down and turns his back to the exit ramp, acting like he isn’t asking for money. “I tell my regulars, ‘No disrespect, but the cops are here.

I don’t want either of us to get in trouble,’” Martin says, declining to give his last name because he’s concerned he’ll be arrested.

These little tricks are required for people in Martin’s situation, thanks to House Bills 145 and 161, known as “Pedestrian Safety Amendments.” Lawmakers passed the legislation during the 2017 and 2018 sessions, making it illegal for pedestrians to “impede or block traffic”—and panhandle—on certain roads, highways and on- and off-ramps.

Should authorities see motorists and pedestrians exchange food or cash—meaning the pedestrian walks into the street, impedes traffic and takes money or property from a motorist—then both are considered in violation of the law. The first two offenses are a warning, but the third violation in a year is a Class C misdemeanor.

Rep. Steve Eliason, a Sandy Republican, previously told City Weekly he sponsored the original bill because he was worried about motorists hitting pedestrians standing near major roadways. Traffic safety concerns aside, Eliason says he also worries some panhandlers might use the collected money to get their next fix. “The quickest way for a citizen to get their cash in the hands of these drug cartels is to give it to the panhandlers,” he says.

Utah Highway Patrol Capt. Steven Winward says state officers have issued 115 citations and 190 warnings between when the

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As he stands with his sign on 700 East, Martin says he understands the new laws regarding roadside panhandling and tries to stay out of trouble. law went into effect last summer and June 4, 2018. But those numbers don’t account for the instances when officers simply issue a verbal warning and don’t record the interaction. “Most of the times, it’s educational,” Winward says of authorities’ interactions with panhandlers. “Educate them a little bit, then send them down the road to a safer location.” As for the money potentially being used for drugs, Winward says, “we’re not going to follow somebody to find out what they’re going to do with the money. We don’t have time for that.”

From early June 2017 to early June ’18, Salt Lake City Police have issued eight citations to individuals who have entered roadways to solicit work or money, according to Detective Greg Wilking. But those citations are for a broader category than just panhandling, and include day laborers who hang around local stores, waiting for someone to pick them up and put them to work. “ We in the city have so many calls for service, that where it ranks on priority is fairly low, and if we tell them, ‘ You’re not allowed to be out there panhandling, you need to move along,’ most of them are compliant,” Wilking says. “It’s very much, we’re advising them.”

Both Winward and Eliason say they’ve noticed a dip in the number of people panhandling on roadsides and medians since the bills took effect. “Since this law was passed last year, I don’t see it as frequently,” Winward muses. But he does see people asking for money outside private businesses like Walmart. “They’re out of traffic,” he says. “[UHP is] concerned about safety and pedestrians. We want to make sure that person is safe and nothing happens to them.”

On an overcast May day, Erik Pavlik stands on the corner of 600 South and State Street holding a sign that says he needs beer money. Clad in jeans and a University of Utah sweater, Pavlik says he’s trying to raise cash so he can move to Portland. “One cop said, ‘Look out for me. If I see you getting money, I’m going to give you a ticket and the driver a ticket,’” he says. “They just warned me.”

Pavlik employed a similar sign three years ago when he was homeless. (He has since secured shelter, but he’s looking to pick up some extra funds before the disability money he gets from the Department of Veterans Affairs runs out.)

He estimates he used to make between $120-$200 during the roughly 13 hours he stood on the corner asking for money back then. Now, he makes about $60 in eight hours. “A lot more hustling to get a couple bucks,” he says of the switch.

“I wondered why I haven’t seen too many people panhandling [on roadsides since the bill passed],” he says. “It’s kind of shitty. If people want to help somebody, that’s up to them. It should be the citizen’s choice.”

Eliason has been a member of the board of trustees for The Road Home for more than a decade and is an active advocate for the homeless community—he carries a Narcan injectable and nasal spray in his car, in case he sees someone who overdosed lying on the side of the road. He also sponsored several homeless bills during his time in the Legislature and he volunteers his time to help raise funds for The Road Home.

On the last day of May, Eliason and City Weekly took a drive around Salt Lake City’s panhandling hotspots.

After a police car drove by us on 600 East,

Eliason meets Martin by his regular spot, off an I-80 exit ramp. “This is a really generous corner,” Martin says, though he did see an accident there earlier in the day. “I got behind the pole and hid,” Martin says with a smile after Eliason asks if it would have been dangerous for him to step onto the road.

Martin says he’s never gotten a ticket, but he also has a good relationship with the cops. “If they don’t like you, you might as well not come out at all,” he tells the state lawmaker. Martin explains he and the two people he lives with under a bridge need to make $32 that day. “That’s just what we calculated we needed,” he says.

“That guy seemed to have his stuff together, for the most part,” Eliason surmises, out of Martin’s earshot. Driving again, Eliason says he worries the scars on Martin’s face could indicate drug use, and that the $32 he said he needed would go toward drugs. “I don’t want that on my shoulders, if he overdosed.”

On the other hand, Eliason says as he points at a kid crossing the street carrying a Little Caesars pizza, it’s possible to live off $32 per day.

Approaching 1300 East and 2100 South, Eliason spots a man holding a sign. Parking his car at a gas station, Eliason watches a woman in a vehicle’s passenger seat roll down her window and dig through her purse while the driver waits on a red light. Unable to find anything, the woman mouths, “I’m sorry” to the man as the car speeds off once the light turns green. “It’s extremely busy here,” Eliason says of the intersection, noting that it’d be “definitely a distraction” were the man to walk into the road.

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KELAN LYONS

the middle of 2100 South is “more a divider than a median,” anyway.

Also, the lawmaker adds, James talked about his education and work: “This is actually somebody who found themselves in a difficult position and wants to do something about it.”

“I didn’t give him the money because you were there,” Eliason swears. “I believed him. Maybe I’m gullible; it wouldn’t be the first time.”

The bills, Eliason underscores at the end of the drive, “weren’t meant to stop anybody’s right to ask for money. It simply says if you’re gonna do it, do it in a safe spot.” CW

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James, a youngish man who also declined to give his last name, tells Eliason he’s asking for money because he got robbed that morning. “I lost everything,” he says, mentioning that he has a home, an education and used to work for a home-improvement store. He says he’s made about $9 in the hour since he started standing on the corner. Eliason wishes him good luck before reaching into his wallet and pulling out a few dollars.

“Thank you so much,” James tells him.

Back in the car, Eliason makes clear he didn’t just violate his own law: He didn’t disrupt the flow of traffic when he gave James the money, since he parked and walked over to him on the sidewalk, and the structure in

Erik Pavlik

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Wasatch Theatre Co. Page-to-Stage Festival Wasatch Theatre Co. might be 21 years old, but like many 20-somethings nowadays, finding a place to live on your own isn’t easy. So after two decades of putting on productions in the Rose Wagner Center and other spaces, it’s understandable if WTC is excited about having its own home as part of The Gateway’s revival.

“It means having more autonomy in the kinds of shows we do, ... and how we collaborate and partner with other art groups,” says the company’s artistic director, Brian Pilling.

“It also represents possibility. We’re having to work a little harder—which is helping us grow.”

The debut production in this new space is the company’s annual Page-to-Stage Festival, a showcase for shepherding brand-new short plays to production. For 2018, playwrights Brook Downs, J. Omar Hansen, Sierra DuCharme-Hansen, Hayley Heaton, Jesse Nepivoda and Andrea Kile Peterson drew inspiration for their original works from “missed connection” personal ads on Craigslist, which they were assigned in January. The writers then developed their drafts through April, before turning them over to director Michael Nielsen and a group of six local actors.

“We try to focus on telling stories about relationships,” Pilling says, “and we revelled in the idea of taking seeds from the sometimes humorous, sometimes painful process of realizing we missed something along the way. It shows a side of the human experience that we don’t always get to see. Plus, it provided a fertile ground for our playwrights to discover their voices.” (Scott Renshaw) Page-to-Stage Festival @ Wasatch Theatre Co., 124 S. 400 West, 801-8694600, June 14-16, 8 p.m.; June 16 matinee, 1 p.m., wasatchtheatre.org

DANIELA CARTWRIGHT PHOTOGRAPHY

Complete listings online at cityweekly.net

JOAN MARCUS

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THURSDAY 6/14

ENTERTAINMENT PICKS, JUNE 14-20, 2018

PENGUIN YOUNG READERS

ESSENTIALS

the

FRIDAY 6/15

TUESDAY 6/19

WEDNESDAY 6/20

Ever since Tommy and Jesus Christ Superstar first took Broadway by storm, rock ’n’ roll has become ideal fodder for modern musicals. Billy Joel, ABBA and Carole King are just a few of the artists who have had their back catalogues turned into theatrical reboots, fueling the connection between the stage and pop classics.

Still, for all the music, mystique and memories such “jukebox musical” shows offer, a compelling narrative is still essential, which is why Jersey Boys retains its appeal. Its Grammy, Tony and Olivier Awards earned in 2006 testify to that fact, but there’s also something to be said for a story about four blue-collar guys— each of whom gets a chance to tell the talle from his own point of view—who created their own sound, connected with a savvy producer and sold millions of records worldwide. The Beatles followed in their footsteps, but credit the Four Seasons for establishing the basic band template early on. Only they and the Beach Boys kept a consistent grip on the charts during the ensuing onslaught of the British Invasion. Notably, there’s also a hometown hero playing the lead in this touring production: Utah native Aaron De Jesus in the role of Frankie Valli.

Ultimately, however, it’s the melodies that matter, and there’s certainly more than enough material here. Even those who weren’t alive at the time might know the songs well: “Sherry,” “Big Girls Don’t Cry,” “Rag Doll,” “Oh What a Night,” “Walk Like a Man” and “Can’t Take My Eyes Off You” among them. That’s clearly enough to leave the audience humming on their way out. (Lee Zimmerman) Jersey Boys @ Eccles Theater, 131 S. Main, June 15, 8 p.m.; June 16, 2 & 8 p.m.; June 17, 1 p.m., $40-$130, artsaltlake.org

Utah author Kristen Chandler has been around horses all her life, up to and including working as an adult with adolescents in programs like Bridle Up Hope and Provo’s Heritage School.

But that doesn’t mean it was an obvious choice for her to write a book centered around horses. “There are a lot of books about horses out there,” Chandler says. “When I was a kid, people gave them to me, and … I thought they were too sentimental.”

Chander finds authentic emotion, however, in Thief of Happy Endings, which focuses on a teenager named Cassidy sent by her parents to a summer program in Wyoming where teens work with wild mustangs. But Cassidy has never quite gotten past a childhood accident in which she was thrown from a horse, and has to overcome both that old trauma and the new wound of her parents’ unraveling marriage.

It took Chandler’s own experience going through a divorce for her to find the right way to fold her lifelong love of horses into a tale that also incorporates romance and adventure.

“As a writer is, I tend to avoid things that are close, and that’s what I should be writing about,” she says. “I wanted to speak to the experience of … a life that doesn’t work out like you planned. Which is everyone, right?”

“It felt like [this] was a story of surviving a change in a family,” Chandler adds. “They need to get back on a horse. They need to fall in love and think that their own relationships can be healthy. … You can’t ride a horse without failing. You can’t do your life without failing.” (SR) Kristen Chandler: Thief of Happy Endings @ Provo City Library, 550 N. University Ave., Provo, 801-852-6650, June 19, 7 p.m., free, kingsenglish.com

The parade has ended, but just because Utah’s Pride Festival has come and gone doesn’t mean that all the Pride Month festivities are over.

Ogden’s In the Now Productions continues celebrating all things LGBTQ with its limited engagement of David Johnston’s Candy and Dorothy. Both witty and endearing, this 2007 GLAAD Award-winning play imagines what would happen if Dorothy Day, a politically radical Catholic activist, and Candy Darling, the drag queen and Andy Warhol superstar immortalized in Lou Reed’s “Walk on the Wild Side,” met in the afterlife. After a rocky start, the pair’s odd-couple relationship solidifies just in time for them to become guardian angels of Tamara, a depressed librarian contemplating suicide.

It’s a bizarre premise by playwright David Johnston—who attends a post-performance talkback on closing night—that lends itself to comedy, wit and poignant commentary.

This mix is part of what drew In the Now Productions to take on the project. William Richardson—one of the play’s producers, who also plays Candy (pictured)—says that no one in the group was specifically looking for a project, but when this play materialized they couldn’t pass it up.

“Everyone has a lot to learn from people who are not like them, and I think this play shows that beautifully,” Richardson says. “The comedy of the play actually helps ease us into some deeper truths that we might not have found otherwise.” (Kylee Ehmann) Candy and Dorothy @ Eccles Theatre, WSU Browning Center, 3950 W. Campus Drive, Ogden, 801-633-8907, June 20-23, 8 p.m.; June 24, 1 & 4 p.m., $20, inthenowshows.com

Jersey Boys

Kristen Chandler: Thief of Happy Endings

In the Now Productions: Candy and Dorothy

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big SHINY ROBOT

Crisis of Con-fidence

FanX’s response to sexual harassment allegations leads this long-time contributor to make a personal choice.

COURTESY FANX

BY BRYAN YOUNG comments@cityweekly.net @swankmotron

B

y all outward appearances, Salt Lake City’s genre convention has been going strong for five years now, creating a robust following and even larger fan community. I’ve personally put a lot of blood, sweat and tears into the event formerly known as Salt Lake Comic Con to make it the best possible local show. It gave me so many opportunities that I will forever cherish, most notably the chance to spend 15 minutes on stage with Carrie Fisher. I participated in more than 100 panels, served on the panel committee and personally advocated for the con to be more diverse and inclusive.

These efforts worked—to a point. In the more recent shows, panels and programming were less homogenous. The gender split was more even; the committee even flew in diverse panelists from around the country when they couldn’t be found locally.

Last year, however, cracks began to appear, and it was apparent the right hand didn’t know what the left one was doing. The push for more inclusivity threatened to be undermined by an invitation to Orson Scott Card—a popular author, to be sure, but also a man who has worked actively to suppress the rights of the LGBTQ community.

There was an understandable outcry, and a tone-deaf response from organizers, but, eventually, sense prevailed and Card’s invitation was rescinded. The founders of the convention, Dan Farr and Bryan Brandenburg, promised to do better.

But, at that very same show, local author Richard Paul Evans allegedly touched, kissed and made condescending and sexually harassing remarks to a female author— possibly more than one. When a victim reported the alleged incident to organizers, she asked only that Evans be moved and isolated on the floor of the convention rather than banned, which is what a zero-tolerance policy would have called for.

As news of this response became public and other authors began to speak up, the response from Brandenburg was, to put it mildly, not ideal. He told author Shannon Hale, who was advocating on behalf of the victim, that the #MeToo movement was “trendy,” that he had daughters and that’s why he cared about this, and that Hale should “sit this one out.” Then, through the FanX social media feed, he disclosed Hale’s private contact information, which he later apologized for, saying it was accidental.

This response ticked off every box on the

“problematic” checklist. Brandenburg took a leave of absence after making an apology, though I’m not sure that step was enough, especially since rumors swirled about his continued involvement with the convention.

Richard Paul Evans, the founder of a “men’s group” called the Tribe of Kyngs, then went on television to admit that he touched and kissed women at FanX without their consent. He also offered preposterous gems like this to KUTV Channel 2’s Chris Jones: “There is a war on men, and that men—white men in particular—are under attack, oppressed by a changing culture, victims of an extremist feminist agenda.”

While Evans also backtracked his more incendiary comments, the damage was done. Guests and writers began announcing their withdrawal from FanX. This was also my personal tipping point.

While convention organizers might indicate there’s a zero-tolerance policy for harassment on paper, they appear reluctant to execute such a policy in practice. They’ve announced plans for a training session and a new updated sexual harassment policy, but their track record has proven they don’t quite understand these issues and, despite

apologies, still seem to believe this is merely a public-relations storm to weather. That was the gist of social media messages I received from organizers just one day after Brandenburg’s apology and promise to take a break from social media.

It felt awkward. It felt disingenuous.

It made me feel dirty, and I don’t want anything I’m involved in to make me feel like that.

Because of all this, I can no longer in good conscience contribute to FanX unless things change. In my mind, there’s only one way through this that will allow the convention to move ahead and to let the Salt Lake geek community thrive.

My suggestion to Dan Farr and Bryan Brandenburg is this: Step down completely, and either sell the convention or convert it into a nonprofit. Bring on a diverse board of local and national geeks. The community and its safety and peace of mind are more important than profit, and there’s no reason for the community to suffer any more for the bad choices of a few.

Like former FanX guest Leonard Nimoy as Mr. Spock once said, “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. It’s logical.” CW

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PERFORMANCE THEATER

Annie Hale Center Theater, 225 W. 400 North, Orem, through Aug. 11, dates and times vary, haletheater.org Candy and Dorothy Good Company Theatre, 2404 Wall Ave., Ogden, June 15-24, Friday-Saturday, 8 p.m.; Sunday, 4 p.m., inthenowshows.com (see p. 14) Crazy For You CenterPoint Legacy Theatre, 525 N. 400 West, Centerville, 801-2981302, June 15-July 14, dates and times vary, centerpointtheatre.org Jersey Boys Eccles Theater, 131 S. Main, June 15-17, Friday-Saturday, 8 p.m.; Sunday, 1 p.m., artsaltlake.org (see p. 14) Mary Poppins Utah Cultural Celebration Center, 1355 W. 3100 South, West Valley City, through June 22, dates and times vary, culturalcelebration.org Matilda Tuacahn Center for the Arts, 1100 Tuacahn Drive, Ivins, through June 29, dates and times vary, tuacahn.org Page-to-Stage Festival Wasatch Theatre Co., 124 S. 400 West, through June 16, 8 p.m., wasatchtheatre.org (see p. 14) Rodgers & Hammerstein’s Cinderella Tuacahn Center for the Arts, 1100 Tuacahn Drive, Ivins, through June 30, dates and times vary, tuacahn.org SB Dance: Something Really Big, Part II: Ergo Decapiatur Rose Wagner Black Box, 138 W. 300 South, June 15 & 16, 8 p.m., sbdance.com Trixie Mattel: Now With Moving Parts The Depot, 400 W. South Temple, June 15, 7 p.m., depotslc.com The Who’s Tommy Ziegfeld Theater, 3934 S. Washington Blvd., Ogden, June 15-30, FridaySaturday, 7:30 p.m.; Saturday matinee June 23, 2 p.m., zigarts.com You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown CenterPoint Legacy Theatre, 525 N. 400 West, Centerville, 801-298-1302, through June 30, dates and times vary, centerpointtheatre.org

CLASSICAL & SYMPHONY

Gina Bachauer International Artists Piano Competition Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, through June 23, times vary, artsaltlake.org

COMEDY & IMPROV

Abi Harrison Wiseguys SLC, 194 S. 400 West, June 14, 7 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Jacob Leigh Wiseguys West Jordan, 3763 W. Center Park Drive, West Jordan, June 15, 8 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Mark Normand Wiseguys SLC, 194 S. 400 West, June 15-16, Friday, 8 p.m.; Saturday, 7 & 9:30 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Paul Sheffield Wiseguys West Jordan, 3763 W. Center Park Drive, West Jordan, June 16, 8 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Shawn Paulsen Wiseguys Ogden, 269 25th St., June 15-16, 8 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Terry Fator Ed Kenley Amphitheater, 403 N. Wasatch Drive, Layton, June 15, 8 p.m., davisarts.org Tom Papa Wiseguys SLC, 194 S. 400 West, June 20, 7 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com

LITERATURE AUTHOR APPEARANCES

Ben Park: The Politics of Diversity Weller Book Works, 607 Trolley Square, 801-328-2586, June 14, 6:30 p.m., wellerbookworks.com

David McGlynn: One Day You’ll Thank Me: Lessons from an Unexpected Fatherhood The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, 801484-9100, June 19, 7 p.m., kingsenglish.com Kristen Chandler: Thief of Happy Endings Provo City Library, 550 N. University Ave., Provo, 801-852-6650, June 19, 7 p.m., kingsenglish.com (see p. 14) Leah Gilbert: A Couch for Llama The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, 801-4849100, June 15, 11 a.m., kingsenglish.com StacyPlays: Wild Rescuers: Guardians of the Taiga The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, June 16, 2 p.m., kingsenglish.com

moreESSENTIALS

COMPLETE LISTINGS ONLINE AT CITYWEEKLY.NET

SPECIAL EVENTS FARMERS MARKETS

9th West Farmers Market International Peace Gardens, 1060 S. 900 West, Saturdays and Sundays through mid-October, 10 a.m.-2 p.m., 9thwestfarmersmarket.org Downtown Farmers Market Pioneer Park, 350 W. 300 South, Saturdays through Oct. 20, 8 a.m.-2 p.m., slcfarmersmarket.org Park Silly Sunday Market Main Street, Park City, Sundays through Sept. 23, parksillysundaymarket.com Tuesday Farmers Market Pioneer Park, 350 W. 300 South, Tuesdays through Oct. 17, 4 p.m.-dusk, slcfarmersmarket.org Wheeler Sunday Market Wheeler Farm, 6351 S. 900 East, Murray, Sundays through Oct. 28, slco.org/wheeler-farm

FESTIVALS & FAIRS

8th Annual Bee Fest: A Celebration of Pollination Wasatch Community Gardens’ Green Team Farm, 824 S. 400 W. No. 127, June 16, 9 a.m.-2 p.m., catalystmagazine.net Chalk Art Festival The Gateway, 90 S. 400 West, June 15, noon-9 p.m.; June 16-17, 10 a.m.7 p.m., utahfostercare.org Chase Home June Jubilee Chase Home Museum, 1150 S. Constitution Drive, Liberty Park, June 16, 11 a.m.-2 p.m., heritage.utah.gov Miss Utah Scholarship Pageant Capitol Theatre, 50 W. 200 South, through June 16, 7 p.m., missutahpageant.com Salt Lake City Gem Faire Mountain America Expo Center, 9575 S. State, Sandy, June 15-17, Friday-Saturday 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; Sunday, 10 a.m.5 p.m., gemfaire.com Utah Asian Festival Mountain America Expo Center, 9575 S. State, Sandy, June 16, 10 a.m.7 p.m., utahasianfestival.com Woodland Fairy Festival Gardner Village, 1100 W. 7800 South, 801-566-8903, through June 23, gardnervillage.com

TALKS & LECTURES

Animal Tracks and Signs Anderson-Foothill Library, 1135 S. 2100 East, June 18, 1 p.m., slcpl.org

VISUAL ART GALLERIES & MUSEUMS

Alyce Carrier: Celebration of the Hand Temporary Museum of Permanent Change, 300 South between 200 West and West Temple, through June 17, museumofchange.org Ancient Nights SLCC Center for Arts & Media, 1575 S. State, through July 10, calendar.slcc.edu Betta Inman Art at the Main, 210 East 400 South, through July 14, artist reception June 15, 6-9 p.m., artatthemain.com Buster Graybill: Informalism UMOCA, 20 S.

Work by J. Vehar-Evanoff—depicting an image painted over to where it becomes obscured—is on display at Modern West Fine Art (177 E. 200 South, 801-355-3383, modernwestfineart.com) in Adrift, June 15-July 14, with a gallery stroll and artist reception on Friday, June 15, 7-9 p.m.

West Temple, 801-328-4201, through Sept. 8, utahmoca.org Chapman Library 100th Birthday Historical Photo Exhibit Chapman Library, 577 S. 900 West, 801-594-8623, through June 28, slcpl.org Charles Keeling Lassiter Bountiful Davis Art Center, 90 N. Main, Bountiful, through June 22, bdac.org Chase Westfall: Control UMOCA, 20 S. West Temple, 801-328-4201, through Aug. 9, utahmoca.org Chiura Obata: An American Modern Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, through Sept. 2, umfa.utah.edu Cinematic Landscapes: Utah’s Film Legacy Main Library, 410 E. 200 South, through July 6, slcpl.org Desarae Lee and Jeffrey Hale: Conjuring Downtown Artist Collective, 100 S. 258 East, June 15. 6-9 p.m., downtownartistcollective.org Ditchbank: Paintings and Ceramics Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, 801-524-8200, through June 15, times vary, slcpl.org Epicenter: Our Futures Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, through July 1, umfa.utah.edu Historias de Ayer y Hoy (Stories of Yesterday and Today) Kimball Arts Center, 638 Park Ave. Park City, through July 8, kimballartcenter.org In Her Own Image Urban Arts Gallery, 137 S. Rio Grande St., through July 1, urbanartsgallery. org J. Vehar-Evanoff: Adrift Modern West Fine Art, 177 E. 200 South, June 15-July 14, artist reception June 15, 7-9 p.m., modernwestfineart.com (see above) Josh Samson: The Identity Project UMOCA, 20 S. West Temple, 801-328-4201, through Oct. 13, utahmoca.org

June Group Exhibition A Gallery, 1321 S. 2100 East, through July 7, agalleryonline.com Laleh Ghotbi: Exploring my Artistic Side Anderson-Foothill Library, 1135 S. 2100 East, through July 5, slcpl.org Laura Sharp Wilson: Small Alice Gallery, 617 E. South Temple, through July 6, artist reception June 15, 6-9 p.m., heritage.utah.gov LEGO City Blocks The Leonardo, 209 E. 500 South, through Aug. 31, theleonardo.org Mark Santos: The Spirit of Dance Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, through July 20, slcpl.org Our Sacred Landscape Rio Gallery, 300 S. Rio Grande St., 801-245-7272, through July 6, heritage.utah.gov Out Loud: Mostly Human UMOCA, 20 S. West Temple, 801-328-4201, through July 14, utahmoca.org Play On! Chase Home Museum of Utah Folk Arts, 1150 S. Constitution Drive, Liberty Park, through June 29, heritage.utah.gov Summer Solstice Event A Gallery / Allen + Alan Fine Art, 1321 S. 2100 East, June 15, 6-9 p.m., agalleryonline.com Vanessa Romo: The Practice of Standing Still Art Barn/Finch Lane Gallery, 1340 E. 100 South, June 15-Aug. 3, saltlakearts.org The Veil SLCC Eccles Gallery, 1575 S. State,through July 13, calendar.slcc.edu Virginia Catherall: Wearable Landscapes Art Barn/Finch Lane Gallery, 1340 E. 100 South, June 15-Aug. 3, saltlakearts.org Wren Ross: The Summons Has Reached Us Finch Lane Gallery, 54 Finch Lane, June 15-Aug. 3, saltlakearts.org

@slcburgerweek

1 Point

check in and tag us!

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order fries

1 Point

5 48 266 e. 17 0 8

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e i c u s so. 7 h a 00 -212

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5 Points

206 S. West Temple

4242 so. state st.

801-265-9889

Fat Jack’s

barbary coast

801-890-5155 13 neighborhood locations

apollo burger

4 Points 3 Points

801-968-2130 4591 s. 5600 w.

801-906-8604 865 s. main st.

ab’s drive in proper burger

326 S. Main Street

gracies

10660 so. river front parkway 801-981-8873

jcw’s

JUNE 14, 2018 | 19

ts

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Sponsor Support!

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burger week june 20 - june 27

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Step 2: Turn in your Burger Board in at the City Weekly office after June 27, 2018 and you'll be entered to win the various prize drawings.

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jk don’t go there...ever

ihob

international house of burgers

wasatch brew pub

hog wallow

pinky’s

mid city pub

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burger week

Featured Burgers

THE WASATCH

FAT BOY BURGER

CURRY BURGER

Wasatch Brew Pub 100% Fresh, House Spiced Buffalo Burger, Cajun Remoulade, Iceberg Lettuce and Local Spiced Beehive Cheddar ($15)

Ab’s Drive In This delicious Fat Boy burger comes with two patties of meat, cheese, tomatoes, lettuce, our homemade ketchup relish sauce, mayo, and you have a choice of onions.

Gracie’s Curried beef, sriracha, lettuce, tomato, pineapple salsa, caramelized onion.

SQUATTERS BISON BURGER

APOLLO BURGER

Squatters 100% Fresh Ground Bison Burger with Polygamy Porter BBQ sauce, Cheddar Cheese and Crisp Onion Straws ($16)

Apollo Burger Fresh flame-broiled patty piled high with thinly sliced, signature seasoned pastrami, Apollo Sauce, fresh tomatoes, lettuce, onions, and melted American cheese between a cornmeal topped bun.

THE GREEK Lumpy’s 1/4 pound ground lamb patty with fresh tzatziki and arugula lettuce. Available only during City Weekly’s Burger Week.

VEGAN IRISH BURGER Piper Down “It’s a virtual Planetoid!” A mess of a burger with a Quinoa Kale Almond Patty, Beyond Burger (+$2) or Impossible Burger (+3), piles of Herbivorous Corned Beef, warm Sauerkraut, melted Swiss Cheese and 1000 Island Dressing held together on a Potato Roll. Finished off with ripe Tomatoes, Lettuce, Yellow Onion and a Pickle Spear.

BACON GUACAMOLE BURGER JCW’s 1/3 lb of 100% choice AAA ground chuck, Swiss cheese, lettuce, bacon, and homemade guacamole. Ole!

GHOST PEPPER AND JALAPENO

Kein Fleisch

Mid City Pub Our succulent beef patty topped with spicy ghost pepper cheese, sautéed jalapeños, lettuce, tomatoes, caramelized onions and chipotle aioli.

Ice Haus Sliced grilled kielbasa atop a Beyond Meat Burger patty with beer carmelized onions, sautÉed mushrooms, warm sauerkraut and melted provolone cheese between a toasted bun with vegenaise, LÖwensenf mustard, mixed greens and tomato.

GARLIC BURGER Pinky’s 8oz special blend grass fed beef, ciabatta bun, handmade fries and a family garlic recipe.

Green Pig Pub

BIG SUE A Bar Named Sue sue spiced angus ground chuck, sharp cheddar, highwest campfire whisky bbq sauce, hickory smoked bacon, house made red onion ring, avocado, mayo, vosens baked sesame seed bun, all put together with love

CAJUN COWBOY BURGER Hog Wallow Pub Louisiana Hot Links, sautéed onion, cheddar cheese, 7 oz fresh beef patty and lettuce smothered in house made BBQ sauce

the full dresser Barbary Coast 1/2 lb beef patty, topped with ham, pastrami, bacon, Swiss cheese, and all the usual suspects.

RING OF FIRE Bar Named Sue - Highland Sue spiced hamburger patty topped with Habenero pepper jack cheese, hatch Chile’s, and our fried Jalepeno chips. Finished lettuce, onion, tomato, and our jalapeño aioli. Better make sure you have a full beer and plenty of napkins to wipe your brow with this one.

three little pigs Lucky 13 A wild boar patty, seasoned perfectly with our special blend of wild game seasonings topped with grilled Black Forest ham, our signature house smoked bacon and melted cheddar cheese on a bed of sweet baby greens, juicy tomato and onion slices in a fresh locally baked French rosette!

It comes with fries for only $12!!!

THE FRENCH ONION BURGER the royal Made with red wine caramelized onions, Gruyere cheese, on a 1/3 pound patty in between a roasted garlic bun.

casanova burger house made angus burger with anaheim peppers, fried egg, pepper jack cheese, cajun bacon, garlic aioli with avocado, lettuce, onion, tomato, on toasted ciabatta bun.

PORK MILANESE

MY MEXICO

the graduate

Fat’s Jack’s Burger Emporium Lettuce, tomato, red onion, salsa, fried jalapeno, peppered bacon, pepperjack cheese, avocado and chimichurri ranch all on our Niman Ranch patty and in between a fresh brioche bun from Vosen’s Bakery.

chedda burger Swiss cheese, Teriyaki glazed pork belly, coconut crusted pineapple with a coconut mayo.

follow us @slcburgerweek on

Proper Burger Co. Salted Caramel Porter cherry sauce, roasted sweet potato, spinach, and topped with a crisp Granny Smith apple salad.

ENRIQUE LIMÓN

BY ALEX SPRINGER comments@cityweekly.net @captainspringer

I

AT A GLANCE

Open: Monday-Thursday, 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday, 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Saturday, 3-10 p.m.

Best bet: A surf & turf combo meal Can’t miss: Their corndog-style fried shrimp

JUNE 14, 2018 | 21

gone back to Lagoon’s Pioneer Village circa 1978. The restaurant itself looks like the exterior of a theme park ride, or as if someone excised a spaghetti Western set and transplanted it to a lot next to the Ogden River. I don’t mean to cast the place in a negative light by comparing it to a theme park—it adds to the mystique when you roll up for the first

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Despite the fact that it’s just off Washington Boulevard, The Prairie Schooner exudes a sense of seclusion from the rest of the city and an almost surreal aura of temporal displacement. Not that it feels like you’ve actually gone back in time to the rootin’ tootin’ 1800s, from which the restaurant apparently took its inspiration. It’s more like you’ve

f there were a Venn diagram that included the categories “in Ogden,” “craving a steak” and “possessed of a crippling need to eat inside a covered wagon,” then The Prairie Schooner (445 Park Blvd., 801-392-2712, prairieschoonerrestaurant.com) would land smack-dab in the middle of it. It’s not quite worth the trip from Salt Lake to Ogden on its own, but for those who are visiting our neighbor to the north for the Ogden Twilight Summer Concert Series, the 25th Street Antique Car Show or the Eccles Dinosaur Park, it’s a place that can complete your experience.

immolating blast of horseradish with my prime rib, and this stuff wasn’t quite on that level.

The most surprising part of the evening was the three gigantic shrimp.

Notwithstanding the vast amount of fried shrimp I have consumed in my life, it never occurred to me to batter them up before they hit the deep-fryer. Instead of the crumby, panko-adjacent fry that clings to most shrimp renderings, here you end up with fried shrimp that’s more akin to a corndog. Scoff if you must, but applying this blue-collar frying philosophy to plump shrimp before squirting them with a bit o’ lemon juice and dipping them in cocktail sauce is a bit of food heaven by way of the state fair.

All things considered, The Prairie Schooner isn’t the best steakhouse on the block, but you’d be hard-pressed to find another place where you can eat dinner inside a wagon, so it retains a peculiar level of charm. Perhaps it’s this elusive quality that makes it so undeniably Ogden—a fascinating little gem in a city full of strange surprises. CW

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Get stuffed at Ogden’s Prairie Schooner.

becue—everything that makes us bloodthirsty carnivores drool. I’ve commented on this before, but if a restaurant bets big on atmosphere like this place does, it had better damned well deliver the goods when it comes to food.

I spotted a promising list of steak combination plates that added seafood like lobster tails and fried shrimp to the mix, and I ended up getting the Rustler Combo ($31.99), which consists of a 10-ounce New York Strip and three big ol’ fried shrimp. For $2.50 more, I added sautéed mushrooms and onions on top of that mother, and went with the au gratin potatoes. My wife got the prime rib ($21.99) with a yam covered in butter and cinnamon sugar. Service was quick, though we had a few missteps with our orders— my fried shrimp came after my steak, as did our complementary bread loaf, but no biggie overall. As steaks go, mine was decent—well-seasoned and cooked medium-rare as requested.

I did run into some tough bits along the way, but I wasn’t mad at this particular cut. Our server informed us the prime rib could only be cooked from medium to well, so it lacked the amount of tender-to-juicy ratio I typically favor with prime rib. And the horseradish sauce on the side was muted to the point of tasting like sour cream. I want a nasal cavity-

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

Big Kitsch on the Prairie

time and half expect an amateur actor dressed in cowhide chaps and a fringed vest to jump out and scream “Yee-haw!” in your face.

Thankfully, there was no yeehawing, which was probably for the best. My family and I had just endured some pretty awful traffic on Interstate 15, and I’m sure my wife would have sucker-punched the first buckaroo that attempted such an interaction. Instead, we were greeted in a prompt and blessedly untheatrical fashion before we made our way to our own little covered wagon. The Prairie Schooner offers more traditional dining areas, but the draw of the place comes from being able to pretend that you’re part of a wagon train that has just hitched up for the night. All seats are against the wall to replicate the effect, and each dining room is complete with a central campfire scene littered with imposing taxidermy that adds to the surreal ambiance. While the adult me was only mildly amused by the gimmicky interior, deep down I could hear 7-year-old me freaking out about getting to eat dinner at a place like this.

The Prairie Schooner’s fauxfrontier atmosphere lends itself very well to serving up a traditional steakhouse menu. You have your New York strips, your porterhouses, your prime rib and your bar-

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FOOD MATTERS

MAKE YOUR RESERVATIONS

BY ALEX SPRINGER @captainspringer

Buy one entree

free! monday - friday only

equal or lesser value w/ this ad expires 06.28.18

54 w. 1700 s.

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Tastemakers Hits Downtown

If you’re curious about downtown Salt Lake’s culinary scene, but a little short on time, Salt Lake Magazine’s Tastemakers event is a great way to kick off the weekend. For eight years running, Tastemakers has provided a singular dining experience with a restaurant crawl of epic proportions. The two-night event features food and drink from more than 40 local restaurants, including Pig and a Jelly Jar, Texas De Brazil, Del Mar al Lago, The Garage and the newly minted Rico Cocina y Tequila Bar. In addition to the food pavilion at the Gateway (400 W. 100 South), Tastemakers features a tasting bus that takes ticket holders on a culinary tour of downtown. The event takes place on June 14 and 15 from 5-10 p.m. Tickets are $45 for a general pass and $85 for VIP access, which comes with five free drinks and access to 15 extra tasting options. Tickets are good for both nights of the event and are available at eventbrite.com. Don’t forget to pace yourselves.

Go back in time with the Five Alls.

Make your reservation now!

801.582.1400 or FIVEALLS.COM

Thu: 6-9:30pm | Fri/Sat: 5:30-9:30 1458 South Foothill Drive

A LA MAISON by

Bacon Dinner at Hoof and Vine

As part of its monthly wine-pairing events, Hoof & Vine (7680 S. Union Park Ave., Midvale, 801-569-4645, hoofandvine.com) is hosting a bacon-centered dinner on June 16. Those who are familiar with the restaurant’s crusade for reinventing the American steakhouse won’t want to miss an evening where Chef Ken Rose digs deep into his appreciation for all things grilled, smoked, sliced and served. If you’re not already interested, do the words beef tenderloin, braised Kurobuta pork belly or fried funeral potatoes do anything for you? The four-course meal costs $65 or $50 without the wine pairing, and reservations can be made over the phone. It’s the baconwrapped dinner you’ve been waiting for.

Father’s Day BBQ Buffet at Snowbasin

For that blues-and-barbecue-loving dad in your life, Snowbasin Ski Resort (3925 E. Snowbasin Road, Huntsville, 888-437-5488, snowbasin.com) hosts an entire day of live music, free gondola rides and copious amounts of smoked meat. It all kicks off with a barbecue buffet that includes beer can chicken sliders, pork chops, flank steak and maple-bacon cheesecake among other tasty dishes. The buffet is at Needles Lodge, which is a free gondola ride up the mountain, promising a breathtaking view as attendees enjoy all the barbecue goodness that they can eat.

The event coincides with the second night of Snowbasin’s Blues, Brews & BBQ music series, where Los Lobos headlines. Tickets are first come, first served, and they’re priced at $40 for adults, $20 for youth and $30 for dads.

The unique & authentic french experience has arrived 1617 S 900 E | 801-259-5843

TRY OUR $9.99 LUNCH SPECIAL

Monday through Friday 11:00 AM-10:00 PM Saturday 12:00 PM-10:00 PM Closed Sunday

VOTED

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Quote of the Week: “Barbecue sauce is like a beautiful woman. If it’s too sweet, it’s bound to be hiding something.”

–Lyle Lovett Food Matters tips: comments@cityweekly.net

1664 Woodland Park Dr. Layton, Utah 801-614-0107 | tasteofindiautah.com

Looking ahead at some killer shows, tracing Twilight's origins, waxing poetic on concerts that were and adding some flavor to your favorite musical genres.

Get in the van,

a jam-p ac summe ked rm fest sea usic son is here.

best summer concerts

JUNE 14, 2018 | 23

By Jordan Floyd

best SUMMER BEST summer concerts CONCERTS

24 | JUNE 14, 2018

Blues, Twilight Brews Concert Series and BBQ Sundays through Sept. 30, Snowbasin Mountain Resort

Aug. 16-Sept. 13, Gallivan Center

Ogden Red Butte Garden Twilight Outdoor Concert Series Thursdays through Aug. 9, Ogden Amphitheater

twilightconcerts.com

ogdentwilight.com

How to pregame: Sip a bottle of Uinta Cutthroat for about 45 minutes. Then, in frantic succession, take three shots of any liquor you’ve got because the Uber is two minutes away and you lost track of time.

How to pregame: Given the electro-duopop-funksomethingmade-by-acomputer lineup, it might be fun for attendees to take a few pregaming notes from the Das Energi community.

Now through Sept. 17, Red Butte Garden Amphitheatre

redbuttegarden.org/concerts

snowbasin.com

How to pregame: Everything you need in the way of alcohol or food will be available at the venue, so sit back, enjoy the mountain views and try not to hit a moose.

What to wear: A T-shirt with this line emblazoned across the chest: “Salad? That’s what my food eats.”

What to drink (or eat) while there: The joke here is that we would ask this question for a concert series with the answer stated in its name.

What to post: A photo of you jamming out to Reno-based roots band Jelly Bread while—get this!—eating jelly bread on your Snapchat story.

What to wear: Sport your favorite band-T from past Twilight lineups as a way to pay homage to one of the better things to ever happen to this state. No, the Wu-Tang Clan shirt you bought at Forever 21 a few years back does not count.

What to drink (or eat) while there: Buy a beer, take a few slugs from a flask when you’re surrounded by a crowd, peruse the food truck lineup—it doesn’t matter what you do because you and everyone else will end up at The Pie Hole afterward.

What to post: Throw a black-and-white photo of the crowd and stage on Instagram with the caption: “Do y’all remember when this shit was free?”

What to wear: In a crowd that undoubtedly will pride itself on denimor leather-clad individuality, the only way to break the mold among a hoard of mold-breakers is to move in the opposite aesthetic direction. That’s right—wear cargo shorts.

What to drink (or eat) while there: What is the Ogden equivalent of going to The Pie Hole after a concert?

What to post: If The Flaming Lips’ performance is anything like it was at the 2013 Twilight Concert Series (or any performance they’ve ever done, for that matter), chances are you had the opportunity to snap a picture of Wayne Coyne making some Kafkaesque show on stage that only dudes who use the term Kafkaesque will appreciate.

How to pregame: Get a little buzzed after chugging a few gallons of Kombucha.

What to wear: A T-shirt that reads: “I am Sheryl Crow’s friend, the communist in the RV.” What to drink (or eat) while there: All I can say for sure, is that when you hear those guys who did the song for the Wendy’s commercial perform (who are they again?), you’ll have to fight off fantasies of being strung out on a Dave’s juicy double.

What to post: Hop on Facebook Live when Indigo Girls perform “Closer to Fine” and burn your college diploma.

Now you’re really free.

Deer Valley Music Festival June 30-July 11, Deer Valley Snow Park Outdoor Amphitheater deervalleymusicfestival.org

How to pregame: Choke down a pair of inexplicablypriced $5 pints of Pabst at your local Park City bar.

What to wear: In anticipation of hearing Broadway hits from Andrew Lloyd Webber and Stephen Sondheim, it’d be most appropriate to wear your best Phantom costume, or better yet, to saunter about the festival with you and your friends donning cat costumes.

What to post: A video on your Insta story in which you zoom in on one of the orchestra cellists and poll your followers: “Is this guy’s big violin compensating for something—yes or no?”

Summer Concert Series June 14-Sept. 1, Cherry Peak Mountain Resort, Richmond skicherrypeak.com

How to pregame: Listen to Smash Mouth’s “All Star” on repeat the whole way up to Richmond, no matter which of the series’ artists are performing.

What to wear: For $12.35 on Etsy you can buy a handmade, soft-cotton Tshirt with the lyrics to Smash Mouth’s “All Star” printed down the front. Wear that.

What to drink (or eat) while there: The thought of hearing Smash Mouth play “All Star” live will be all that you need to sustain yourself.

What to post: Put a video of you singing along to all roughly 3½ minutes of Smash Mouth’s “All Star” on Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, VSCO, YouTube, Vimeo, a blogger site you’ve just created for this momentous occasion, and your uber-private Finsta with the caption: “The meme has become reality.”

Through Oct. 4, USANA Amphitheatre, WVC usana-amp.comom

How to pregame: From Kesha and Macklemore (June 16) to the inimitable Kenny Chesney (June 28), many jewels adorn Usana’s summer crown.

But few shine brighter than Vans Warped Tour’s last hurrah (June 30). To commemorate the occasion, get a stick-and-poke tattoo of your best friend’s name on your thigh and pierce something other than your ears.

What to wear: Go all out. Grow out your hair (bangs, specifically) in advance. Dye it black, blonde, pink, green, orange or all those colors at once. Cram your legs into skinny jeans you bought from the women’s section—just like you had to do before the clothing companies caught on.

While Vans footwear might be the obvious standard, breaking out a fat-tongued pair of Osiris or Etnies shoes could be the right step, so to speak, toward encompassing the early-aughts’ aesthetic.

Lastly, and most importantly, whatever it is you do, wear a studded belt.

What to drink (or eat while there): For the sake of nostalgia, slam a couple of Boo Koo energy drinks in between bouts of head banging or while standing in an isolated corner of the fairpark, thinking, “What’s another night all alone?”

JUNE 14, 2018 | 25

What to post: A video on your old Tumblr of Utah’s own The Used singing “The Taste of Ink.” Ask your followers: “What happens when it’s been in your hands, when you’ve savored every moment of it?

Where do we go after we stood atop the bright lit city? RIP, the Warped Tour we knew.”

BEST best SUMMER summer concerts CONCERTS

What to drink (or eat) while there: Dig into a meat pie you bought from your barber.

Cherry Peak

usana concerT series

best SUMMER BEST summer concerts CONCERTS

26 | JUNE 14, 2018

Country Salt City Crucial Fan Fest Sounds Fest 8

July 26-29, Deseret Peak Complex, Tooele countryfanfest.com

How to pregame: Keystone Light is $16 for a 30 rack.

Tell everyone.

What to wear: A Stetson hat, shit-kickers, Wranglers with a perfect circle worn into one of the back pockets, and starsand-stripes everything else.

What to drink (or eat) while there: Beer has all the calories you need; chew has the vitamins.

What to post: Whatever you put on Facebook, make sure that not a single hand is without a beer and that an American flag can be seen somewhere in the photo.

June 20 & 27, Gallivan Center

Sept. 28-29, Utah State Fairpark

saltcitysounds.com

facebook.com/crucialfest

How to pregame: Supposedly, there’s free beer in the City Weekly offices right across from the Gallivan Center if you can scale the building and get in through one of the office windows.

How to pregame: Reciting the Satanist’s creed might be a good way to prepare.

It goes as follows: “I believe in the force of Satan, the father of the void, ruler of the Earth, king of the world, and in Lucifer, the guiding light and the morning star above.

And Lilith, who seeded the world with her creation. I believe I am my own church.

I hold the spirit of Satan within my heart; I was born without the stain of sin; my spirit is one with Satan. As it is now and ever will be, so it is done.”

What to wear: Draw a mouth and eyes on a white fivegallon bucket with a Sharpie and wear it on your head. See how many autographs you sign and how many people ask you when you’re set starts.

What to drink (or eat) while there: Pour one partly out during Bone Thugs-n-Harmony’s “Crossroads” for the loved ones you’ve lost; but not all the way out because beers are $10 and those who have passed wouldn’t want you to waste a beer on a libation anyway.

What to post: That Boomerang of your drunken attempt at an Aoki jump you took last week.

What to wear: Blood and sweat (and some other bodily fluids) don’t show as well on black clothing.

What to drink (or eat) while there: The blood of a virgin sacrifice? It’s hard to tell what these bands’ lyrics are saying.

What to post: Proudly show all of your Instagram followers the black eye and split lip you earned in the mosh pit.

Summer Nights with The Stars Now through Sept. 8, Kenley Amphitheater, Layton davisarts.org

How to pregame: You might have to sip down a few Dirty Shirley’s at Applebee’s.

I don’t think you can get alcohol anywhere else in Davis County.

What to wear: To pay homage to ABBA and the cover band performing their music at the series, slip into the whitest, brightest, most sparkling and grandioselooking outfit you’ve got and go to town.

What to drink (or eat) while there: Word on the street is that the Kenley Amphitheater serves Philly cheesesteaks that pair excellently with Night Ranger’s set.

What to post: If you aren’t posting a way-too-long Snapchat story of yourself absolutely losing it to Melissa Etheridge’s “I’m the Only One,” then you’re doing this entire series wrong.

Continued on p.29

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Nashville’s Legends at Legends

Songwriter Series Begins July 12th $40 @smithtix Legends Motorcycle Museum

Bonanza Campout June 22-24, Rivers Edge, Heber City bonanzacampout.com

How to pregame: Find out what tent Wiz is staying at, and see if you’re Taylor Gang material.

What to wear: For all the fashion advice that could be given here, it feels most prudent to say, simply, wear mosquito repellant.

Aug. 17-18, The Great Saltair, Magna dasenergifestival.com

How to pregame: Spend the entire night beforehand crafting rave kandi bracelets, one of which features the provocative question: “Do DJs even do anything on stage?”

What to wear: For more masculine types, anything you could find in Pac-Sun about four years ago when all-over galaxy prints and depictions of animals wearing cheap wayfarers were en vogue will do. For those looking to sport a daring look, it seems the current trend in rave-wear is to appear as if you are a kind of furry, Technicolor space entity that, though you’ve only just come to Earth to experience what humans call EDM, still somehow adheres (very loosely) to Western standards of modesty (i.e., if anything, your nipples are covered) and is overcome by a superficial understanding of Eastern philosophy and its surrounding lore.

What to drink (or eat) while there: Anything but the Kool-Aid, man.

What to post: A blurry video of a moment far too long before a “sick drop” on Snapchat with Deadmau5’s anthropomorphic, mousy grin lurking in the background (or is that just a fellow festival-goer?)

Aug. 24-26, Rivers Edge, Heber City reggaeriseuputah.com

How to pregame: Let’s say you want to do this (almost) completely legally. Find a designated driver, and with at least 10 or so hours before show time, make your way to the The Green Joint dispensary in Parachute, Colo. Once there, buy how ever many edibles you think you can handle and get out quick—you’ve got a show to catch.

An hour away, just before you cross back to Utah, is a town called Mack. Eat your edibles there, leaving no trace that you ever had them. From Mack to Heber City, it is about a four-hour drive. If the edibles take about an hour to hit, then you’re sure to enjoy a semilegal high for the remaining three hours of the drive and about one to three hours of the festival. Who am I kidding? That’s a terrible idea.

What to wear: Is it ever too hot to wear a Baja hoodie?

What to drink (or eat) while there: I hope to God there’s snacks aplenty for this crowd.

What to post: A photo with you and all your new Earth brothers and sisters on Instagram with the simpleyet-telling caption: “One Love.”

Continued on p.30

JUNE 14, 2018 | 29

What to post: Upload a video of your friend doing an acoustic cover of “Closer” around the campfire with the caption: “I’m almost drunk enough to think this song is good.”

Energi

Reggae Rise Up

BEST best SUMMER summer concerts CONCERTS

What to drink (or eat) while there: Typical scout camp fare will do: Delicious, all-beef hot-dogs impaled by sticks you found near the campsite and roasted over a scant fire, served on buns that didn’t exactly hold their form in your trunk (but are edible no less), with a side of value-brand chips.

Das

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30 | JUNE 14, 2018

Sandy Amphitheater Now through Sept. 8, Sandy sandyamp.com/events

How to pregame: Spend a day binge-watching David Archuleta’s rise to American Idol fame.

What to wear: Wear whatever the Village People are wearing, except the Native American headdress, for God’s sake.

What to drink (or eat) while there: Since you can bring your own food and drink into the venue, I cannot think of a better food and music pairing for this series than washing down a Café Rio burrito with a can of Diet Coke while watching Donny & Marie Osmond’s “Return Engagement.”

What to post: À la David Archuleta’s viral video of him singing every part of his hit-song “Crush” with the help of his bathroom mirror, post a sure-to-be-viral vid of you singing all the parts to Kid ‘N Play’s “Rollin’ With Kid ‘N Play.” Ho-la, ho-la, hey, baby.

Utah Blues

Festival

June 16, Gallivan Center utahbluesfest.org

How to pregame: Listen to the Blues Origins, Blues Masters, Blues Roots, Blues Rock, and Blues Classics playlists on Spotify in succession. It’ll only take you, like, a full day to do.

What to wear: A necklace with a totally real Robert Johnson “Kind Hearted Woman Blues” vinyl attached to it.

July 4, Lavell Edwards Stadium freedomfestival.org

How to pregame: Tout hollow platitudes about freedom and equality for all for nearly 250 years and—I don’t know—shoot off a firework or two.

What to wear: Show your respect and love of the nation’s flag by wearing any number of flag-featuring outfits, from cut-off shorts with stars-and-stripes material as the back pockets, to a buttondown shirt made entirely of an American flag fabric.

What to drink (or eat) while there: Do you think they still sell Cougar Tails when it’s not football season?

What to post: For the love of God and America (which He founded), anything but a video of the fucking fireworks display.

Continued on p.35

JUNE 14, 2018 | 31

What to post: Inspired by your time at the festival, dust off the ol’ six string and put a couple passable covers of blues songs up on your Facebook story.

best summer concerts

What to drink (or eat) while there: The festival will be equipped with food-truck fare. Nothing goes with blues music quite like a sushi burrito, am I right?

Stadium of Fire America’s Freedom Festival

best summer concerts

best summer concerts

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best summer concerts

Utah Arts

Festival June 21-24, Library Square uaf.org

How to pregame: There is no pregame—the game is happening and has been since the dawn of human life itself. As Oscar Wilde famously stated, “Life imitates art far more than art imitates life.”

The art festival, so to speak, has informed our daily mode of living and has for as long as any of us have been alive.

Women’s Redrock Music Festival Aug. 10-11, Robber’s Roost, Torrey

womensredrockmusicfest.com

How to pregame: Empty a cooler of beer in the heart of Utah’s red rock country.

What to wear: Whatever the fuck you want.

What to wear: Make a statement by rocking headto-toe body paint splattered about in a Jackson Pollock style.

Whatever you buy from the food vendors, do so with a nearly-maxed-out credit card like a real artist would.

What to post: Does anyone have cell service in Torrey, Utah?

—Jordan Floyd

JUNE 14, 2018 | 35

What to post: Post a photo on Instagram of you and your two best friends recreating Artemisia Gentileschi’s “Judith Slaying Holofernes.” For props, all you need is a corn dog and a heaping pile of ketchup packets.

What to drink (or eat) while there: Nothing pairs better with a gathering of badass women than a restaurant that serves a dish with actual rattlesnake meat, which is exactly what Torrey, Utah’s Café Diablo serves. Mix rattlesnake cakes and their signature Jalapeño Melon Margarita with this festival’s crowd and you’ve got one helluva gathering.

best summer concerts

What to drink (or eat) while there:

best summer concerts

36 | JUNE 14, 2018

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FRED HAYES

twilight 1992

FRED HAYES

twilight 1991

30 and Thriving

After an uncertain year, Twilight returns with a new focus on the future.

By Nick McGregor features five locally owned and operated restaurants, along with plans to create a 21-and-over space for fans to enjoy cocktails in addition to craft beer. Jensen is also quick to sing the praises of long-standing area production companies and sponsors. “Everything on the Gallivan site [will be] a locally owned Salt Lake company,” he says. “We’ve really focused on staying true to that original Twilight purpose.”

Although Broadway and the arts council only signed a one-year pilot deal to co-produce the series, both entities anticipate enough success—an estimated 7,000 fans shelling out $10 per concert ticket on Aug. 16, 23, 30 and Sept. 6 and 13—to look ahead to the future. “Our investment in this is for the long term,” Jensen says. “There were difficulties with costs at Pioneer Park; it wasn’t necessarily a long-term sustainable model. Our goal is to build Twilight into something that can self-fund itself with a financial footprint that will allow it to continue.”

The Twilight Concert Series certainly faces much stiffer music festival competition in 2018 than it did in ’88. Surprisingly, on this point Jensen sounds the most optimistic. “It’s an incredible time to be a music fan in this market,” he says. “So many different people have built this scene, but Salt Lake is a big sandbox … I’m a cheerleader of a successful downtown music scene.

That is a healthy thing. If shows do well at The Urban Lounge, at The Complex, at Soundwell or at Red Butte Garden, all it does is create a better culture.”

Although as of press time the official lineup for this year’s Twilight Concert Series hasn’t dropped, Jensen promises it will turn heads and attract those diehard fans that have remained loyal since the series’ humble origins. Jones, currently KRCL’s manager of community content, has seen her share of stacked lineups and has one piece of advice for Salt Lake music fans: “Don’t think about it, just go. [That’s] my Twilight philosophy—just go and enjoy the experience.” CW

JUNE 14, 2018 | 37

We’ve all heard the story by now: Less revenue came in while far more money went out in costs during the series’ seven-year run at Pioneer Park. The arts council initially announced that due to cost overruns, Twilight would take a hiatus in 2018. Local firm Broadway Media then stepped in to fill the void and bring the series back to its longtime home at Gallivan Center—and back to its original purpose.

Thanking the series for shaping his musical taste and informing his take on the musical world in general, Jake Jensen, vice president of events for Broadway Media, describes the task of taking over Twilight as both daunting and inspiring. “Twilight is one of those foundational pieces of the music scene here in Salt Lake City,” he says. “I grew up in Cottonwood Heights and spent my Thursday nights in the summer coming downtown to Gallivan Center. It introduced me to new music and afforded me the opportunity to see legendary acts for very little money.”

Salt Lake City Arts Council Executive Director Karen Krieger says that passion appealed to her and the SLCAC board. “Our vision for Twilight is to provide renowned artists that are very accessible—both in price and in location,” she says. “Broadway has resources in areas that we haven’t had much depth in, so it’s a great opportunity to maximize strengths of both organizations.”

Praising the council’s commitment to accessibility, Jensen says the new regime shares that focus. “By moving it back to Gallivan Center, we can improve the individual experience of fans,” he says. “We’ve brought Twilight within 20 feet of a TRAX station.

We’ve made it more accessible for bikes. Over 40 percent of the parking spaces in downtown Salt Lake are all directly around the Gallivan Center.”

Partnerships with surrounding small businesses further enhance Twilight, Jensen says. He points to what he calls the Gallivan Avenue “food alley,” which

BEST best SUMMER summer concerts CONCERTS

ooking back on 30 years of Salt Lake City’s Twilight Concert Series is an exercise in wistful remembrance. It started in 1988 on the hill by what is now the Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, focusing mostly on folk, Americana and roots music. Anyone around in the ’90s will remember blues legends like James Cotton, John Mayall and Junior Brown trading summer slots with bluegrass pioneers like Doc Watson and icons like Arlo Guthrie, all while slowly increasing doses of zydeco, Latin jazz and brass bands added flavor to the Twilight stew.

Lara Jones, longtime reporter and KRCL 90.9 FM radio host, looks back on those days fondly, as many SLC veterans do. “My favorite Twilight period is way back,” she says, “when people rolled out their picnics on the hill and artists played on the patio at the bottom of it. Small, intimate—those are my favorite concerts.

Like you know a secret no one else does.”

As Twilight grew, the series, owned by the non-profit Salt Lake City Arts Council and funded predominantly by the city and county, migrated to downtown’s Gallivan Center, its home until 2010. By then, musical programming had taken a decidedly modern turn, attracting a new generation of musical stars like Jake Shimabukuro, MeShell Ndegeocello, Michael Franti, Galactic and Keller Williams.

Two years later, Twilight boasted the expansive setup and far-flung lineup of even the best superfest: Broken Social Scene, Run the Jewels, Neko Case, The Roots, Bon Iver, Pusha-T, Sonic Youth, My Morning Jacket, Wu-Tang Clan, The Black Keys, Lauryn Hill and many more performing on a giant stage at Pioneer Park. The crowds flocking all over Salt Lake Valley this summer to see The Flaming Lips, Belle & Sebastian, Trombone Shorty, Death Cab for Cutie, The Decemberists, Beach House, and Father John Misty are probably doing so because of their past exposure to those bands at Twilight.

38 | JUNE 14, 2018

best summer concerts

Interpretive Snacks Local dishes to complement your favorite music genre.

By Alex Springer

T

Indie Rock

Indie rock is easy to digest, cruelty-free, 100 percent sustainable existential dread—and it’s often found lurking around coffee shops characterized by baristas that prepare their brews with Zen-like concentration and hand cups of hot coffee to customers as if they’d just delivered an infant. Of course, the pinnacle of coffee shop cuisine is the humble and oft-maligned avocado toast.

Nothing quite evokes the tattooed philosophical longing exemplified by indie rock than a thick slice of artisan bread, slathered in smashed, ripe avocado flesh, and sprinkled with a little salt and pepper. My personal favorite rendition of this classic happens to be found at Publik Coffee Roasters (975 S. West Temple, publikcoffee.com). True masters of their craft, they don’t pulverize the avocado into guacamole, and they always sprinkle it with just the right amount of black pepper.

Punk

Reggae

Reggae music makes me think of the beach, and the beach makes me think of fish tacos. You’d think it’s hard to come by really good fish tacos here in our landlocked state—and you’d be wrong. The folks at Lone Star Taquería (2265 E. Fort Union Blvd., lstaq.com) are dedicated to recreating that coastal staple and their fish taco and burrito menu rotates based on what fish is in season, so they’re always fresh. I’m not sure whether it’s the way they cook their fish or if it’s the famous cilantro and jalapeño mayonnaise, but I have yet to be disappointed by their rich menu.

Metal

Classical

I dunno. Wine and cheese?

Country

I suppose alt-country might be a more accurate genre for The Hoss at Sweet Lake Biscuits and Limeade (54 W. 1700 South, sweetlakeslc.com). It’s a far cry from the Blake Sheltons and the Brad Paisleys of the country circuit—if you’re after a food equivalent of that crap, look no further than your neighborhood KFC. The Hoss, on the other hand, represents something a bit more nuanced, a tad more grounded and possesses a lot more character. It drips farm-fresh country goodness with each bite of its buttermilk biscuits, sausage gravy, thick bacon and golden fried chicken. There’s something honest and hardworking about The Hoss that represents the roots of country music, and it has yet to sell out.

Garage

As greasy, floppy, reheated pizza is the patron saint of garage rock, the slice of the day at The Pie Hole (344 S. State, pieholeutah.com) is as good as it gets. The classic pizza stalwarts of pepperoni, cheese and vegan are always an option, but sometimes these guys get really weird with their offerings. A post-concert pizza run at 1 a.m. can put you in a mood strange enough to buy what they’re selling. Mangos with Thai peanut sauce and sliced potatoes with garlic are just a few of their more accessible pies, and their adherence to New York-style thin-crust pizza adds to its garage rock authenticity.

Rap

I’m a total cultural outsider when it comes to rap music, but I’ve very much come to appreciate the way listening to it makes me check myself before I wreck myself. That said, I’m going out on a limb and saying that the best culinary manifestation of the rap genre comes from the taco stands on State Street, between 800 and 900 South. Rap music has always been about embracing the roots of where you come from, even if those roots are planted in the asphalt of city streets. It’s also about turning the frustrations of being marginalized by the world at large into an art form that can’t be culturally appropriated. That said, the men and women behind these taco stands are doing exactly the same thing—they’re staying true to their cultural roots, and they’re translating their experience into a singular art form that you just can’t get anywhere else.

Rap music and taco carts have unfairly earned a negative stigma for their presence in American culture, but that stigma can easily be removed with a little understanding (and an adventurous appetite). CW

JUNE 14, 2018 | 39

When I think of metal, I think of that strange, transcendent place where pain and pleasure meet for a brief moment before the scale tips one way or the other. When food is concerned, the best example of this paradoxical moment comes from eating stuff that ranks sufficiently high on the Scoville scale.

Something like the Ring of Fire Burger at Lucky 13 (135 W. 1300 South, lucky13slc.com), which is the reigning champion of food that has kicked my ass.

It’s one of their delectable bacon cheeseburgers decked out with a few huge

scoops of grilled jalapeños and habaneros for maximum mayhem. It strikes the exact balance that metal does—it’s delicious so you want to keep eating, and eventually the pain of all that heat starts to meld with the pleasure of how good the burger tastes. If metal was a burger, it would live at Lucky 13.

BEST best SUMMER summer concerts CONCERTS

After thinking long and hard about this one, I have to say that the most punkrock dish you could eat is probably a hot dog from 7-Eleven (7-eleven.com).

These meat sticks are a blatant middle finger to the establishment du jour, which happens to be an expensive, exclusive space where the word “curated” comes to bear. Plus, digging deep into the in-house Petri dish, otherwise known as the condiment station, unlocks a small chance of catching a foodborne illnesses—making the whole process slightly dangerous. Noshing on a salt rocket while potentially getting exposed to hepatitis? What could be more punk rock than that?

ENRIQUE LIMÓN

he more I learn about chefs and the lives they lead, the more I compare them to rock stars. See, they’re defined by their passion and creativity as much as they are by their obsessive perfectionism and self-destructive personalities. If that’s the case, then the food that we put into our mouths should have some cosmic connection to the music that we put into our ears. It’s the kind of thing I think about late into the night, but the more I explored, the more I realized that music and food aren’t that far removed from one another. That being said, here’s a culinary interpretation of music genres to get your taste buds to cheer for an encore way past the summer months.

best summer concerts

40 | JUNE 14, 2018

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Back to the BASH A personal summer concert retrospective.

By Alex Springer

I

one of my brothers up onstage for a brief interpretive dance session; evidence of which miraculously found its way onto YouTube.

While I was on the sidelines checking out the subcultures-within-subcultures that populated the nooks and crannies of the fairpark, I learned a bit about the unwritten bylaws of concert-going. Things like the price you have to pay if you want to get close enough for the lead vocalist to spit on you—which consists of completely forgetting your concept of personal space.

I learned that crowd surfers will absolutely kick you in the head, and that every time the vocalist said anything at all, we all had to cheer. It was weird at first, but that’s the thing about concerts—you can either resist the weird or become part of it, and the latter is always way more fun.

1997

1998

This was the year, man. I still didn’t have a driver’s license, but I did have a burgeoning posse. Concerts are great when you’re there with your crew. Here we were, a bunch of pissant high school freshmen, but damn if we didn’t think we owned the place. We stole shoes from crowd surfers, threw each other into mosh pits and ordered our hot dogs with onions thank you very much.

I remember catching a bit of Soul Coughing, because my developing brain thought they were a lot cooler than they actually were. Primus was the headliner, Les Claypool wore one of those German military helmets with a sharp spike sticking out of the top, and they closed out the show during a massive rainstorm that caused evaporated sweat steam to waft upward from the gathered mass. To this day, it’s one of the weirdest, most surreal things I’ve ever seen.

Since the show ended about 5 p.m., my friends and I ended up throwing our sweaty, exhausted bodies down on whatever surface would accommodate us at

1999

Ah, 1999 was a very good year. I had a girlfriend, I could drive—I mean, we were still punk sophomores, but that was a little better than punk freshmen. The lineup that year is much clearer in my memory. We saw some Ben Folds, some Jimmie’s Chicken Shack, some Big Bad Voodoo Daddy—a performance during which I was introduced to skanking, which thankfully died in the early 2000s. Primus headlined this year as well, going on right after their protégé Buckethead took the stage.

We kept up our general tradition of acting like morons, but something definitely changed during that show. Our little group of high school buddies was doomed to implode after sophomore year, and things throughout the rest of high school weren’t quite the same. The 1999 Big Ass Show rounded out my summer concert experience for the rest of that stint, but it marked an interesting transition as a music fan.

Not long after the Big Ass Show, I got a job at the Sam Goody in Fashion Place Mall, back when there was a Sam Goody in Fashion Place Mall—or anywhere, for that matter. The fire that these outdoor concerts lit in my chest helped me build a solid foundation of music geekery, and guided me to bands like Pavement, Sunny Day Real Estate, Ministry, Portishead and The Strokes.

So what’s the takeaway here, you might ask, young reader? Well, from a former punk-ass to all of you young punk-asses getting stoked for summer concert season to once again grace us with its ephemeral, slightly icky presence—be it at the Twilights, Red Butte or even SLC Jazz Fest for a classier kind of icky— I implore you to take it all in. I also bid you happy thrashing. Or skanking, if that’s more your thing. CW

JUNE 14, 2018 | 41

In all honesty, my first experience with the Big Ass Show wasn’t entirely positive. I went with a couple of my older brothers, most likely because I harangued our mom into persuading them to bring me along.

The elder Springers were all into cool music, and I was entering the age when I also wanted to be into cool music, so I saw this as an opportunity to do some anthropological research—who did my siblings want to see? What made these acts cool? My enquiring mind wanted to know.

It seemed weird to me that my brothers agreed to bring me along—kid brothers cramp all kinds of style—but the logic of his decision slowly dawned on me when we crossed the threshold into the fairpark. It wasn’t long before my brothers met up with friends or assaulted the mosh pit, leaving me to my own devices.

Truth be told, I spent most of the concert people-watching. I vaguely remember seeing The Violent Femmes, and the only reason I remember watching Poe’s set was because she brought

my mom’s place while we spent the rest of the night watching horror movies. Best. Summer. Ever.

BEST best SUMMER summer concerts CONCERTS

was sad to learn that the X96 Big Ass Show is officially a thing of the past. I hadn’t paid much attention to the show for the past decade or so—mostly because I too am a thing of the past. My passionate zeal to attend outdoor, day-long concerts in the scorching heat has long since dissipated. Back in my snot-nosed preteen years, however, my friends and I got our moms to take us to the Big Ass Show from 1997-’99, back when it was at the Utah State Fairpark. It was a hot, sticky affair and we all left covered in beer and the sweat of some 1,000 screaming fans. But, it also marked my official transition from wayward preteen to punk-ass teenager, so I loved every frenetic minute of it.

best summer concerts

42 | JUNE 14, 2018

BUY TICKETS IN ADVANCE TO SAVE! games

FOOD trucks

wristbands

live music

Aging adds complexity to these local brews.

BY MIKE RIEDEL comments@cityweekly.net @utahbeer

L

of toasted char. Hop aromatics are mostly restrained. Layers of toffee blanket the tongue with a mélange of malt spice cake and bourbon-soaked dark fruit that evokes notions of maple as the wood flavors pile on. Hints of rye whiskey begin to emerge midway through, really adding to the beer’s groove as the wood spices join forces. As we enter the end, grapefruit and orange peel pith add some resinous bittering; keeping the more cloying aspects of the malt at bay in the finish. Echoes of caramel, toast, oak and grapefruit trail into a medium-long linger.

Overall: I really enjoy the complexities

that the barrel brings to this 7.8 percent beer, though sadly, the bright hop character of the red ale has been slightly diminished. However, the basic balance remains intact, just tweaked and rearranged. With all the pros and cons, I call this one a wash.

If you’d like an interesting education on how different barrel-aged beers can really be, I’d recommend adding these two beers to your syllabus. The complete contrast of these two well-made beers will show how the process of shaping a beer’s flavor can continue into the aging process. As with all good things, these beers will not last forever, so get on them pronto. As always, cheers! CW

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ast week, I wrote about two very “uncomplicated” beers that have recently hit the market. This week, I’d like to dive into the more complicated end of the pool. If there’s one good way to take your average garage-band beer and turn it into multi-platinum superstar ale, your simplest tool is the used oak barrel.

Just find a beer that will work well with the contents previously held in the oak, store it away for a few months and you’ll soon find your mind blown. This week’s selections are quite distinct from each other, and are perfect examples of how much fun barrelaged beers can be.

Epic Oak and Orchard Strawberry Rhubarb: It pours a slightly hazy medium golden/ yellow/light orange color, with a faint foamy

cap that for the most part is ornamental.

The aroma has a big lightly tart lemon, lime, strawberry, rhubarb, white wine, oak and musty/leathery funk. This complexity of scents could only come from a barrel-aged sour. The taste begins rather simply with lime, strawberry and rhubarb. However, once your tongue’s sour receptors light up from the beer’s barrel-aged tart base, those flavors explode into a fireworks display of sour fruits. Green apple and pear are the next flavors to emerge, while vinous pinot grapes wrap up the flavors at mid-palate. As we get to the back end, earthy oak, herbal grass, pepper and musty/leathery funk create a fine lingering dryness that is slightly tannic.

Overall: This 6.9 percent beer is an outstanding fruited sour ale. There’s an allaround great complexity, robustness and balance of fruity/funky/acidic yeast, fruit, oak barrel and moderate malt flavors; it drinks very smooth, crisp and refreshing, with pleasant acidity and tartness. It’s a brilliant balance between fruit, Brett and Lacto flavors, with great oak presence.

Kiitos Barrel Aged Imperial Red: This whiskey barrel-aged beer pours a surprisingly clear deep ruby/chestnut color with little in the way of haze. Its creamy, offwhite head caps the beer with stubborn staying power. Expecting the more common aromas of toffee and grapefruit, I was instead met with the barrel’s influences: Oak, bourbon, cherry, vanilla and a hint

MIKE RIEDEL

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the food you LOVE

n c e8 i S 96 1

GOODEATS Complete listings at cityweekly.net Featuring dining destinations from buffets and rooms with a view to mom-and-pop joints, chic cuisine and some of our dining critic’s faves.

Moochie’s

Featured on Food Network’s Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives, Moochie’s is the place to go in downtown SLC for authentic-tasting Philly cheesesteaks. But the restaurant is about much more than that. Philadelphia-born owner Joanna Rendi also assembles some of the tastiest meatball sandwiches around. The chicken cacciatore and deepdish lasagna are popular as well, and be sure to try Don’s (Joanna’s husband) delicious “zappy” potato salad and a Tastykake imported from Philly. Multiple locations, moochiesmeatballs.com

Red Butte Café

mon-thur 11am-11pm fri-sat 11am-12am sun 3pm-10pm

Britton’s

At this Sandy restaurant, you’ll find old-fashioned burgers and shakes, along with breakfast items like pancakes, omelets, “garbage hash” and French toast served all day long. A must-try at this cozy eatery is the famous Hog burger, which is wrapped in two grilled-cheese sandwiches. It’s crazy and delicious. The house specialty grilled pork chops is another customer favorite. Add a housemade milkshake and you’re good to go. 694 E. Union Square, Sandy, 801-572-5148, brittonsrestaurant.com

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K TO ME! E E R G L L A IT’S

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it alian v i lla geslc.com

5370 S 900 E 801.266.4182

House specialties here include pepita-crusted salmon, grilled sirloin with onion rings, falafel with saffron aioli and chili relleno with glazed yams and chayote squash succotash. There’s also a wide array of pastas, salads, tacos and sandwiches. If you have room after dinner, indulge in the tempting dessert menu, with offerings like the chocolate Aztec tart, three-layer orange-chocolate mousse cake and bourbon pecan pie. The restaurant also provides microbrews from Desert Edge Brewery. Don’t forget about brunch on Sundays. 1414 S. Foothill Drive, 801-581-9498, theredbuttecafe.com

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JUNE 14, 2018 | 45

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MARGARIT AS!

REVIEW BITES A sample of our critic’s reviews

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ENRIQUE LIMÓN

O D H E AV E N FO ManADN sen & Restauran s e t a G EGR c i l e erm t The Dispensary

Most successful restaurants spend years trying to perfect the marriage of atmosphere and menu, but I don’t know of any other restaurant that has diners contribute to an ongoing wall collage, or play on a wall-mounted Scrabble board.

The Dispensary also strives to be a zero-landfill restaurant, including end-of-day food waste being donated to feed local livestock. However, divorcing the food from The Dispensary’s mission makes for a more mixed experience. Pot pies ($12) are the prime prescription, served in ramekins with stewed meat and veggies topped with either a bit of puff pastry or a cracker made of cricket flour. The turkey ragout, chicken paprikash and a sweet-meets-spicy mixture of tomatoes, meat and chickpeas all tasted fine, but each had a surprisingly muted flavor profile. While I’m glad to support a sustainable, community-centered establishment, the portion sizes are also a bit small for the price. The sides and desserts offer some interesting complements to the main menu, including taro root chips ($4.50). It has atmosphere in spades, and its interpretation of community-conscious eateries will keep it up and running while it irons out its menu bumps. Reviewed May 17.

54 W. 1700 South, dispensethelove.com

20 W. 200 S. • (801) 355-3891 Open Mon-Wed: 9am-6pm Thu-Sat: 9am-9pm

serving breakfast, lunch and dinner

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2005 E. 2700 SOUTH, SLC FELDMANSDELI.COM FELDMANSDELI OPEN TUES - SAT TO GO ORDERS: (801) 906-0369

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46 | JUNE 14, 2018

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3

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nomad-eatery.com

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FILM REVIEW

Super Sized

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Incredibles 2 delivers a whole lot of action, a whole lot of ideas and a whole lot of movie.

OF THE TO PHO WEEK

BY SCOTT RENSHAW scottr@cityweekly.net @scottrenshaw

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Violet, Dash, Mr. Incredible and Elastigirl in Incredibles 2 to celebrate pure innate talent from a new angle, offering a suggestion that waiting for a hero to save the day diminishes us. The story’s primary antagonist, The ScreenSlaver, also addresses a culture of passivity, while Bob’s sub-plot takes on the changing gender roles of the story’s 1960s setting. There’s even a nod to the power of representation in heroes grateful for Elastigirl’s work bringing supers out of the shadows. If you want to know what Incredibles 2 is “about,” there’s no one easy answer.

It feels hypocritical to knock a franchise movie for attempting to have a brain, when so many get knocked for never even trying.

And maybe there’s a little cognitive dissonance in a studio like Pixar that’s so focused on heart going so much for the head instead.

There’s also a sense that Incredibles 2 is a manifestation of Dash’s pure unfocused forward motion. Brad Bird delivers a whole lot of movie here, and a lot of that movie is great. That greatness generally shows itself when he’s letting you experience his talents, and not so much when he’s trying to make you think about them. CW

INCREDIBLES 2

| CITY WEEKLY |

BBB Holly Hunter Craig T. Nelson Sarah Vowell PG

TRY THESE The Incredibles (2004) Craig T. Nelson Holly Hunter PG

Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol (2011) Tom Cruise Jeremy Renner PG-13

Tomorrowland (2015) George Clooney Britt Robertson PG

JUNE 14, 2018 | 47

The Iron Giant (1999) Vin Diesel Eli Marienthal PG

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The mostly split action between Elastigirl’s crime-fighting missions and Bob’s domestic challenges offers two distinct arenas for comedy and choreography, both of which offer plenty of delights. Bird makes magnificent use of Elastigirl’s unique physicality as she tries to save a runaway monorail, her motorcycle dividing into segments connected by her elongated torso when necessary. Meanwhile, Bob faces his biggest challenge in dealing with Jack-Jack’s newly manifested multiple powers, including the baby’s decision to treat a raccoon as his arch-nemesis. The action sequences snap with Bird’s mastery of geography, and his gift for finding a kind of majestic slapstick in characters bounding through dimensional portals or trying to slow down a speeding hydrofoil.

Yet there’s also a level on which this feels like a lot of modern super-hero sequels, where the driving principle is often “do what the first one did, but more.” So Incredibles 2 takes its returning elements like costume designer Edna Mode (Bird himself, still a scene-stealer), Violet’s adolescent insecurities and Bob’s frustrations with feeling unable to be his Mr. Incredible self, and adds several new supers to the mix. The climactic battle might be bigger than The Incredibles’ showdown with the Omnidroid, but also busier in a way that doesn’t allow for a clean, sharp focus on our heroes.

The “more” manifests itself even more in the ideas percolating throughout Incredibles 2, and there are plenty of them. On the one hand, Bird actually comes at his tendency

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n a world gone mad, it should be easy simply to embrace Incredibles 2. Where so many franchise extensions feel like cynical cash grabs, this one emerged only when its creator believed he had a new story worth telling. It’s a visual wonder, full of breathtaking set pieces and an energy that makes most modern super-hero movies feel positively inert.

So why can’t I stop thinking about all the ways Brad Bird movies frustrate me?

You put yourself on thin critical ice when questioning the cinematic bona fides of the guy behind such beloved animated features as the original The Incredibles and The Iron Giant. And indeed, it’s hard to argue against his status as one of the most talented contemporary craftsmen of genre adventure. But from the exceptionalism embodied by The Incredibles and Ratatouille to the dense mythology of Tomorrowland, Bird has shown himself to be philosophically ambitious—and sometimes his big ideas get in the way of his kinetic chops. If his magnificent work on Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol showed anything, it’s how gifted he is at constructing action when he’s not also trying to deliver a message.

Now here we are with Incredibles 2, which picks up more or less where the original left off as the Parr family of superheroes—Bob/ Mr. Incredible (Craig T. Nelson), Helen/Elastigirl (Holly Hunter), Violet (Sarah Vowell), Dash (Huck Milner) and baby Jack-Jack (Eli Fucile)—battle the Underminer. The ensuing damage reinforces the notion that “supers” are destructive and dangerous, but Winston Deavor (Bob Odenkirk) believes it’s just a PR problem. Along with his tech-savvy sister Evelyn (Catherine Keener), Winston hires Helen to change the image of supers with some low-impact saving-the-day, leaving Bob the job of stay-at-home dad to the three kids.

CINEMA CLIPS MOVIE TIMES AND LOCATIONS AT CITYWEEKLY.NET

NEW THIS WEEK Film release schedules are subject to change. Reviews online at cityweekly.net

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AMERICAN ANIMALS BBB “This is not based on a true story,” say the onscreen titles at the beginning; “This is a true story.” A bold assertion, but Bart Layton, whose previous film was the unbelievably engrossing documentary Impostor, makes a strong case with his narrative debut, about a 2004 incident in which four college kids tried to pull off a heist of rare books. Barry Keoghan and Evan Peters play the two main dopes, overachieving Spencer and slacker Warren, who half-jokingly come up with the idea to rob the university library’s collection, only to have that half-joke evolve into a real (but not very good) plan. As a heist film, it spins its wheels for too long, forgetting that these guys are short-sighted buffoons to whom we have little emotional connection. But Layton’s master stroke is incorporating real interviews with the actual guys into the story, even having them interact with the movie versions of themselves. He blends documentary and dramatization in a way I don’t think I’ve seen before, allowing each half to comment on the other and turning an otherwise so-so true-crime dramedy into something noteworthy. Opens June 15 at Broadway Centre Cinemas. (R)—Eric D. Snider

A KID LIKE JAKE BBB.5 Alex (Claire Danes) and Greg (Jim Parsons) have no problem with the fact that their 4-year-old, Jake (Leo James Davis), loves pink and sparkles, dolls and fairy tales. But not everyone is as accepting as they are. This beautiful adaptation by Daniel Pearle of his own play, simple yet profound, isn’t about Jake, but about how Alex and Greg are coping—or not—with this

new parenting challenge. How do you protect a child who is unusual without crushing everything that makes him unique?

Danes and Parsons (he is a real revelation here) create a warm, generous portrait of a progressive marriage, and the movie is as nonjudgmental as its protagonists, as gently questing as they are for a solution to their impossible quandary. Even as A Kid Like Jake delves into raw pain and frustration, director Silas Howard magically maintains a relaxed, authentic naturalness.

It feels less like a story being told and more like messy reality unfolding before us as it wrestles with the complexities of new ideas about what it means to live our best, most fulfilling lives that we’re all trying to come to grips with. Opens June 15 at Art House Cinema 502. (NR)—MaryAnn Johanson INCREDIBLES 2 BBB See review on p. 47. Opens June 15 at theaters valleywide. (PG) SUPERFLY [not yet reviewed] The 1972 blaxploitation classic gets a remake. Opens June 15 at theaters valleywide. (R) TAG [not yet reviewed] A group of old friends continues a 30-year-tradition of playing tag together. Opens June 15 at theaters valleywide. (R)

SPECIAL SCREENINGS 36TH CHAMBER OF SHAOLIN At Tower Theatre, June 15-16, 11 p.m. & June 17, noon. (R) THE GENERAL At Main Library, June 16, 3 p.m. (NR) SPLASH At Park City Film Series, June 19, 7 p.m. (PG) THANK YOU FOR THE RAIN At Main Library, June 19, 7 p.m. (NR)

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48 | JUNE 14, 2018

HEARTS BEAT LOUD BB.5 On the most obvious level, this is a genuine crowd-pleaser; it’s also so thin that you can practically see through it. Nick Offerman plays Frank Fisher, a widowed one-time musician now running a Brooklyn record store, facing an impending empty nest as his daughter Sam (Kiersey Clemons) prepares to leave for college in California. Then the song that they record together gains traction on Spotify, and Frank has visions of a family band. Co-writer/director Brett Haley (I’ll See You in My Dreams, The Hero) clearly loves low-key, adultappeal character studies, and Offerman shows range as a doting dad trying to recapture a part of his life that seemed long-lost. But nearly everything here—except Ted Danson, glorious as a stoner bartender—is so wispy that it threatens to evaporate before your eyes, including love interests for both Frank (played by Toni Collette) and Sam (Sasha Lane).

Virtually all the energy the movie can muster goes into the original songs, which are catchy enough to convey that the characters have talent. It would have been nice to transfer more of that passion to when characters were talking, rather than singing. Opens June 15 at Broadway Centre Cinemas.

(PG-13)—Scott Renshaw

CURRENT RELEASES ADRIFT BBB It begins in medias wreck, as 24-year-old Tami (Shailene Woodley) awakens on a foundering pleasure boat in the middle of the Pacific Ocean; the narrative then alternates back and forth between Tami meeting and falling for Richard (Sam Claflin) in 1983 Tahiti, and survival attempts after a massive hurricane. The result of this achronological narrative choice is a story that focuses on the relationship between two wandering, lost souls who have found each other, as director Baltasar Kormákur (Everest) conveys the stark reality of Tami and Richard’s situation without making the experience a grueling procedural, while the screenplay avoids a foot-tapping wait for

the inevitable tempest and its aftermath. Add a performance

by Woodley that captures everything from grittiness to abject despair, and you’ve got a disaster story that gives you a reason to care about who lives or dies. (PG-13)—SR

FIRST REFORMED BBBB First Reformed tackles one of writer/director Paul Schrader’s favorite recurring themes: faith taken to such obsessive extremes that it nearly drives his characters mad. Reverend Ernst Toller (Ethan Hawke, doing the best acting of his career) faces a deepening crisis of faith after the suicide of a parishioner in his upstate New York historic church. It’s a morbid story, but one made with such skill and restraint, with an ending so unexpected and so earned that it deserves multiple viewings, especially by those of us who have struggled with faith or been consumed by grief or political causes.

Schrader captures the cold, flat, bleak winter of the setting, and makes the locations sparse enough to illustrate the hollowness of Toller’s life. It’s the film Schrader’s threatened to make since the 1970s, but has failed to—until now. (R) —David Riedel

HEREDITARY BBB.5 First-time feature director Ari Aster tells the story of Annie (Toni Collette), who is dealing with the recent death of her mother when she begins to see spectral apparitions, and her family faces other terrors. Lurking around the edges of Aster’s story are metaphors for parents who fear what they might pass on to their kids—like mental illness—but the thematic stuff is almost incidental. This is simply one creepy-ass piece of filmmaking, as Aster shows an exquisite sense of where to put the camera, and sound design allows a seemingly innocuous noise like a clucked tongue to become a harbinger of doom. It gets needlessly expository during its climax, and some pacing fat could stand trimming, but it’s worth that extra time to put yourself in the hands of someone who understands how cinema can inspire profound unease. (R)—SR

HOTEL ARTEMIS BB Writer/director Drew Pearce introduces the titular Los Angeles building, a members-only safe house providing emergency medical services to criminals, led by The Nurse (Jodie Foster). Various clients—an arms dealer (Charlie Day), an assassin (Sofia Boutella), a thief (Sterling K. Brown)—bounce off of and around one another, and also try to avoid the rioting taking place outside, because it’s the year 2028 and water has been privatized. The apocalyptic setting has nothing to do with what’s going on inside the building, and feels like a desperate attempt to give the story thematic weight, just like the tragic back story for Foster’s fussy, agoraphobic nurse. It still could have delivered some down-and-dirty genre kicks, but it keeps getting too talky and self-important to let the action get rolling. A penthouse ER for killers should be more fun than this.

(R)—SR

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Nicki Bluhm bares her soul on new record To Rise You Gotta Fall.

 Bar | Nightclub | Music | Sports 

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KARAOKE & pick-a-prize bingo

wednesday 6/13

BY NICK McGREGOR music@cityweekly.net @mcgregornick

karaoke @ 9:00 i bingo @ 9:30, 10:30, 11:30 Thursday 6/14 Reggae

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green leefs the gringos amfs & long islands 1/2 off nachos & Free pool

saturday 6/16

Live Music

NOAH ABRAMS

Live Music

Nicki Bluhm

Batshit Swayze Tuesday 6/19 coming soon 6/22

NICKI BLUHM

6/23 6/24

pato banton salt lake rock show patio concert series w/ neal & taylor from royal bliss

 Bar | Nightclub | Music | Sports  ALL SHOW TICKETS AVAILABLE AT SMITHSTIX OR AT THE ROYAL

JUNE 14, 2018 | 49

w/The Barefoot Movement The State Room 638 S. State Wednesday, June 20 8 p.m. $24, 21+ thestateroom.com

open mic night

YOU Never KNow WHO WILL SHOW UP TO PERFORM

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Each of those has its own phases and stages, and to ignore that or just write about happy, good things, to me is not authentic. [To Rise You Gotta Fall] is authentic as a statement to myself. Some people will like it; some people won’t. But it’s my truth and it’s what I had to do.”

She strikes a particularly strident tone as she expands on the subject. “I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, but I didn’t have a choice when it came to writing songs so close to my heart. The changes in my life were so big that it was really unavoidable. Of course it’s scary. It’s not comfortable. You open yourself up to judgment and criticism, and it’s even harder because it is so personal.

But I’m proud of being courageous enough to put myself out there.

“I know I’m not the only person going through hard, traumatic transitions. For me, this record is almost like a contribution to humanity. If I can bring comfort to someone and let them know they’re not alone in this, that’s my goal. We’re all humans. We all go through pain.” CW

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friDAY 6/15

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or more than a decade, Nicki Bluhm’s personal and professional lives were intertwined with that of ex-husband Tim Bluhm, frontman for California rootsrock band Mother Hips. Nicki joined the band first as a guest vocalist before building her solo career as Nicki Bluhm and the Gramblers, but Tim remained front and center as a co-writer, producer and musical director.

The couple parted ways in 2016, though, and now Nicki Bluhm strikes out on her own with To Rise You Gotta Fall. Released June 1 on Compass Records, it’s far more than a breakup album. Instead, it’s a record full of rage, grief, sadness and rebirth—a document of a very public relationship’s dissolution and a woman standing tall as she confidently moves on. “It’s so nice to release a record out into the world and let it do its thing,” Bluhm says. “You have to own what you said, what you sang and what you did, and in my case, that’s pretty vulnerable stuff.”

The album sounds beautiful, though, recorded in Memphis at the legendary Sam Phillips Recording studio. Bluhm teamed up with producer Matt Ross-Spang to add Southern soul to the cathartic songs she spent two years writing after a spur-of-the-moment relocation to Nashville. The pain on tracks like “How Do I Love You” and “Battlechain Rose” is suffused with sumptuous B3 organ and Stax-esque horns, while hot guitar licks add fire to “Staring at the Sun” and “To Rise You Gotta Fall.”

All that Memphis soul makes ample room for Bluhm’s voice, however, which has always been at its finest in raw, authentic moments. She credits her new backing band—John McNally on lead guitar and vocals; Cameron Carrus on bass; Lemmy Hayes on drums; Jeff Adamczyk on keys and vocals; Kellen Wenrich on guitar, fiddle and vocals—for giving her more space to sing than any collaborators before. “They’re really good at dynamics,” Bluhm says. “The song can get really big, but they carve out space for the vocals. Every voice has nuances, and sometimes those can get steamrolled by a loud band.” Laughing, she adds, “When you can hear yourself as a singer, it’s way more fun.”

What’s most impressive about Bluhm at this stage in her life— two years out from her separation and divorce, but only a couple weeks out from the release of her new album and the kickoff of her first national tour with a new band—is that ongoing sense of joie de vivre. It’s overwhelmingly evident nearly everywhere she creates music; an infectious video of her belting out Hall & Oates’ “I Can’t Go for That” while driving a tour van has garnered more than 3.5 million views on YouTube, and everyone from Bob Weir and Phil Lesh to Ryan Adams and the Infamous Stringdusters has asked Nicki to tour, record and perform with them.

“Music has brought me so much comfort in life,” she says. “But it’s also a reminder that we all experience grief, sadness and anger.

THIS WEEK’S MUSIC PICKS

BY RACHELLE FERNANDEZ, KEITH L. McDONALD, ROBBY POFFENBERGER, NIC RENSHAW & LEE ZIMMERMAN

FRIDAY 6/15

—LOCATIONS— 677 S. 200th W. Salt Lake City 801-746-1417

6885 State St. Midvale 801-561-5390

5654 S. 1900 W. Roy 801-773-2953

We sell tickets!

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fri, 6/15 | Ed Kenley Amphitheater

david archuleta

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25 sat, 6/16 | sandy Amphitheater

nicki bluhm

Learning how to say “fuck you” without really saying it is pretty much all I learned in my four years in the Marine Corps, an environment where women (and/or those who identify as such) have to fight for respect in a sea of toxic masculinity. But one learns to adapt and overcome—and realize that really saying it is what music is for. And local punk band Nasty Nasty is good at it. Some Marines use negative terms toward women with phrases like “blue falcon” or (my least favorite) “WM.” And although the military is a polar opposite of Nasty Nasty, they both own their derogatory phrases. The term “nasty woman,” used

by Donald Trump in 2016 in reference to Hillary Clinton, not only exploded all over T-shirts and bumper stickers but gave inspiration for this band’s moniker.

Historically, punk rock has carried a message, and Nasty Nasty’s message is clear: You aren’t alone. By turning the negative political climate into a positive bastion of riot grrrl empowerment for all, Nasty Nasty uses music as a conduit for how they (and a lot of us) feel.

The band’s “walk the walk” attitude isn’t always in your face, though. Their politically charged tunes come with a sarcastic twist on songs like “Goldilocks” and “AmeriKKK” that deliver that effyou in a playful tone. Nasty Nasty kicks off their tour at this show joined by Shit Dogma and Scrunchies to set the city ablaze and remind everyone that we are not alone. (Rachelle Fernandez) Diabolical Records, 238 S. Edison St., 8 p.m., $5 donation, all ages, facebook.com/diabolicalslc

Iceage $

TACKLEBRUIN

Nasty Nasty, Shit Dogma, Scrunchies

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

SATURDAY 6/16 Iceage, Mary Lattimore

Are Iceage even punk? Actually, scratch that question. We’re musically evolved enough that we don’t need labels. (Also, I have no idea.) Instead of trying in vain to put this Danish quartet into a box, let’s focus our attention on the wealth of genre-defying treasures in each song. Take, for instance, “Pain Killer,” the second single off their LP Beyondless (Matador Records). The track opens with a “25 or 6 to 4”-esque horn piece, woos us with sensual poetry (“Like death, she takes everything/ And dazes me like patent medicine/ Into this strange divine”), then drops us headfirst into a massive guitar hook after each verse. These elements are unexpected, but predictability is not part of Iceage’s brand. Since playing in North America for the first time in 2013, their critical acclaim has grown album by album, culminating in this declaration from Noisey: “Fuck the facts, Iceage are the greatest rock and roll band in the world.”

The author of that article is an unabashed fan, so whether his declaration rings true is a moot point. This much is proven: Iceage are meant to be an immersive experience.

They end up cherished by those who allow

Nasty Nasty themselves to get swept away. If you go to their show, you might initially be skeptical of their laid-back live approach. But by the end, the ominous, sweeping physicality of their songs might have you a few inches off the ground. (Robby Poffenberger) Kilby Court, 748 W. Kilby Court, 7 p.m., $14 presale; $16 day of show, kilbycourt.com

MONDAY 6/18

R.A. the Rugged Man, A-F-R-O

When you’ve been in the underground hiphop business for more than 25 years, you’re bound to formulate a routine when going on the road. I imagine R.A. the Rugged Man packs for a tour something like this: “Derby hats? Check. Big gold rope chain? Check.

Custom blazers in various colors? Check.

Beard care kit? Check.” Then, the New York native who’s worked with everyone from Mobb Deep to Wu-Tang Clan to Erick Sermon to Notorious B.I.G. closes up a suitcase with a bunch of random stickers pasted on it and hops into a rare chromeplated late model sedan with a woman

R.A. the Rugged Man

24 wed, 6/20 | the state room

street dogs

18 sat, 6/23 | urban lounge

FOR MORE SHOWS & EVENTS GO TO

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STEVE GULLICK

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52 | JUNE 14, 2018

The Valley’s finest patio welcomes you!

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whose visage could be on the side of a World War II bomber. Off to the next adventure.

R.A. the Rugged Man is no stranger to Salt Lake City, either. He’s performed recently at The Urban Lounge, and seems to always manage to squeeze the Beehive State into his travel plans. R.A. visits this time around with his prodigious protégé A-F-R-O on The Lone Wolf & Cub Tour. Boom-bap beats with thematic undertones, raw and uncut lyrics, as well as some of the most artfully crafted rapid-fire verses in the genre are in store for those who attend this all-ages show. If he had the looks of a traditional model and refrained from censure of the government, R.A. the Rugged Man probably could add a lot more cash to his escrow fund. But then again, if he did that, he wouldn’t be hailed as one of underground hip-hop’s biggest treasures. His loss is your gain. (Keith L. McDonald) The Loading Dock, 445 S. 400 West, 7 p.m., all ages, $15 presale; $18 day of show, loadingdockslc.com

TUESDAY 6/19 6.15 PIXIE & THE PARTYGRASS BOYS

6.16 THE BAD WEATHERS

6.18 OPEN BLUES & MORE JAM

6.21 JELLY BREAD

3200 E BIG COTTONWOOD ROAD 801.733.5567 | THEHOGWALLOW.COM

Frank Turner & The Sleeping Souls, Lucero, The Menzingers, The Homeless Gospel Choir

It’s a rare opportunity when so many headlining bands share the stage on a single night. Indeed, any one of them would be a healthy draw on their own. Each boasts an ample pedigree, and you have to wonder what sort of negotiation was involved when it came to choosing which band would be elevated to the very top of the marquee.

Frank Turner claims the benefit of seven solo albums and a sound that draws from the same alt-folk approach Billy Bragg took early on, complete with the same self-righteous indignation. On the other hand, Lucero has a 20-year career, a blue-collar connection and a rowdy reputation that takes its cue from the defiant sound of 1970s Southern rock and the rebellious outlaw ethic it spawned.

For their part, The Menzingers are wellversed in the art of combining edginess, angst and anarchy in equal measure, an ability that’s placed them at the top of today’s punk-rock pantheon. Tough choice, then, on who deserves the prime mention, but Turner apparently won the toss. Consequently, it

Frank Turner

will be interesting to see who generates the rowdiest response. (Lee Zimmerman) The Complex, 536 W. 100 South, 6 p.m., all ages, $35 presale; $38 day of show, thecomplexslc.com

WEDNESDAY 6/20 Ninja Sex Party, Tupper Ware Remix Party

Although they’re not much of a household name, Ninja Sex Party (or NSP for short) might just be the biggest thing in musical comedy since The Lonely Island. While the band first garnered attention in 2010 for their low-budget, absurdist music videos, frontman Dan “Danny Sexbang” Avidan’s role since 2013 as co-host of the popular let’s play YouTube series Game Grumps has delivered an even wider audience to NSP. Avidan’s confident, soaring vocals and multi-instrumentalist Brian “Ninja Brian” Wecht’s ’80s pastiche instrumentation back their gleefully silly deconstructions of male sexual identity with real musical muscle.

Plus, any band with song titles like “Samurai Abstinence Patrol” and “No Reason Boner” has got something going for them. Avidan and Wecht have self-released three albums of original music, all of which hit No. 1 on the Billboard Comedy Albums chart, rubbing elbows with comedy greats like Jim Gaffigan, Aziz Ansari and Weird Al Yankovic.

Currently gearing up for the release of their fourth album, Cool Patrol, Ninja Sex Party returns to their comedy-oriented roots after two albums of ’70s and ’80s pop covers.

Cool Patrol also marks NSP’s first recorded collaboration with live compatriots Tupper Ware Remix Party, an anonymous band of Canucks and fellow outlandish comicrockers who join NSP on their Tour de Force 2018. As Danny Sexbang has described it, “This is clearly going to be the best rock tour of all time. And if all these shows don’t sell out within the first 30 seconds, Ninja Brian will eat his own face on live TV.” (Nic Renshaw) Union Event Center, 235 N. 500 West, 8 p.m., $25-$69.69, all ages, theunioneventcenter.com

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Wednesdays

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326 S. West Temple • Open 11-2am, M-F 10-2am Sat & Sun • graciesslc.com • 801-819-7565

JUNE 14, 2018 | 53

DINNER & SHOW ONLY AT

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54 | JUNE 14, 2018

MONDAY 6/18

CONCERTS & CLUBS

DELANEY TEICHLER

Black Milk, Nat Turner

THURSDAY 6/14 LIVE MUSIC

Alicia Wrigley (Avant Groove) Corey Richards and Company (Garage on Beck) Creed Bratton (The Complex) The Cronies + Indigo Waves + Kenton + Sofi Gev (Velour) Disenchanter + Cvpitvls + Darklord (Urban Lounge) Little Dragon + Com Truise + Ugly Boys (Ogden Amphitheater) Pint & a Half (Hog Wallow) Reggae at the Royal w/ The Green Leafs + The Gringos (The Royal) Rylee McDonald (Lake Effect) Sunmonks (Kilby Court) Taylor Lacey (The Beehive) Timmy the Teeth (Rye) Tropicana Thursdays feat. Rumba Libre (Liquid Joe’s)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE 80s Night w/ DJ Radar (Area 51) DJ ChaseOne2 (Lake Effect) DJ Juggy (Bourbon House) Dueling Pianos (The Spur)

SATURDAY, JUNE 16

Dueling Pianos feat. Drew & Dave (Tavernacle) Hot Noise + Guest DJ (The Red Door) Jazz & Blues Jam (Twist) Synthpop + Darkwave + Industrial + Goth w/ DJ Camille (Area 51) Therapy Thursdays feat. Feed Me (Sky)

KARAOKE

Areaoke w/ DJ Kevin (Area 51) Cowboy Karaoke (The Cabin) Karaoke w/ DJ Benji (A Bar Named Sue) Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge) Live Band Karaoke (Club 90)

FRIDAY 6/15 LIVE MUSIC

A.M. Bump (The Bayou) Bill McGinnis (Woodenshoe Park) Braden Lee Waiters (Garage on Beck) Bruce Music (Legends at Park City Mountain) Colt.46 (The Westerner) Elastic Jazz Quartet (Avant Groove) Footlight Parade + Tate Sexton & T.A.K. + Fake Blonde + The Rubies (Velour) Genre Zero + Dealin’ in Dirt (The Ice Haüs)

MONDAYS

BREAKING BINGO 9PM $1,000

TUESDAYS

GROOVE TUESDAYS

This spring, Detroit-based rapper and producer Black Milk dropped stellar new album Fever. Always an artist who seems most comfortable directing session musicians from behind his beat machine—his last album, The Rebellion Sessions, was entirely instrumental—Black Milk is not a lyrical gymnast by today’s sky-high standards of rap technicality. But he’s settled into a nice groove as a mic controller on Fever, a collection of jazz-influenced hip-hop tracks that flow together seamlessly. Remarkably, not a single track sounds out of place despite the album’s experimental spirit and tendency to shift quickly in terms of tempo and tone. Wisely, rather than trying to develop a lickety-split delivery, Black Milk has acted like a skilled jazz musician and mastered the nuances of when to leave and fill space in his bars. For example, on the neo-soul single “Could It Be,” his easygoing flows lock in perfectly with a hypnotic vocal sample and a funkyfresh bass line, producing an undeniably dope overall effect. Even though he’s stepped up as a rapper, and guest soul singers swing in and out of the album throughout its duration, Black Milk’s beat-making skills steal the show on Fever. He gets the best out of session players Chris Dave and Daru Jones (especially on tracks “True Lies” and “Will Remain”) and treats the project like a loose musical collage with free-association instrumentals. It might sound messy, but it’s captivating—particularly so when Black Milk comes to town with live backing band Nat Turner. (Howard Hardee) The Urban Lounge, 241 S. 500 East, 8 p.m., 21+, $15, theurbanloungeslc.com

Grupo Revelaçao (The Complex) Inside Job + Betapop + RavenMind (The Beehive) Junction City Blues Band (Brewskis) Juttin Lee (Kilby Court) Kapix + Thunderfist + The Monarchs (Urban Lounge) Nasty Nasty + Shit Dogma + Scrunchies (Diabolical Records) see p. 50 Noise Ordinance + Benview + Cosmic Annihilation +Untamed Engine + Guilty Scapegoat + Elijah Ayers (The Loading Dock) North by North + Sea Elephant + Telesomniac (ABG’s) Philip Kuehn Orchestra featuring John Batiste (The Gallivan Center) Pixie and the Partygrass Boys (Hog Wallow) The Reverend and The Revelry (The Harp & Hound) Rick Gerber & The Nightcaps (The Cabin) Saylo, Simple Balloon, Along for the Ride (The Underground) Skid Row + Videx (Dejoria Center) Terance Hansen Trio (Twist) Trixie Mattel (The Depot) Union Blues (The Barbary Coast)

WEDNESDAYS

Wild Country (Outlaw Saloon) Will Baxter Band (The Ruin) Winter Grain (The Spur)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE All-Request Top 40 w/ DJ Wees (Area 51) DJ Sneeky Long (Twist) DJ Dance Party (Club 90) DJ Juggy (Bourbon House) Dueling Pianos feat. Troy & Mike (Tavernacle) Funkin’ Friday w/ DJ Rude Boy & Bad Boy Brian (Johnny’s on Second) Hot Noise (The Red Door) New Wave 80s w/ DJ Courtney (Area 51) TGIF feat. DJ Vice (Sky)

KARAOKE

Areaoke w/ DJ Kevin (Area 51) Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge)

SATURDAY 6/16 LIVE MUSIC

2018 Utah Blues Festival (Gallivan Plaza) Alan Michael (The Bayou) The Bad Weathers (Hog Wallow)

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PURGATORY

COURTESY PURGATORY

BAR FLY

If you’ve been to Purgatory, you know it’s not just another after-work drinking spot. This upscale bar and restaurant is something modern— something more. At a place so layered with activities, you can sit and imbibe at the fancy bar, chow down in the comfortable dining area or dance and play cornhole on a large open patio. While most bars only fulfill a drinking purpose, food is no afterthought at Purgatory.

Gourmet entrées and tasty small plates complement both the liquor and the atmosphere. Whether joining old friends, going on a new date or indulging in weekend brunch, you’ll find a mature and friendly social atmosphere with most patrons in their 30s and 40s. Fellow patrons described the place as “unique,” “different” and “relaxed;” as one waitress put it, the bar and restaurant has a vibe that is “flat-out cool.” A retractable garage door and roof encourages summer nights on the patio, watching the game on a massive TV or grooving to upbeat music. If you’re looking for a hip and stylish place to dine and drink, Purgatory might be your next adventure. Quality libations and sophisticated socialization create a place that pops. This bar absolutely exceeded my expectations by not abiding by any norm or standard. Its simplicity and chicness stands out in Salt Lake City. (Dash Anderson) 62 E. 700 South, 801-596-2294, purgatorybar.com

Big Red Band (The Barbary Coast) Colt.46 (The Westerner) Cover Dogs (Brewskis) David Archuleta (Sandy Amphitheater) Debbie Downers Acoustic Night (The Beehive) Donner Pass (The Spur) Elastic Jazz Quartet (Avant Groove) Folk Hogan (The Ice Haüs) Genesis Company + Sleep Dealer (The Loading Dock) The Hollering Pines (PayDay Pad at Park City Mountain) Iceage + Mary Lattimore (Kilby Court) see p. 50 The Ivie League (The Harp & Hound) Joshy Soul & The Cool + The Number Ones (Main Street Park City) Kesha + Macklemore + Wes Period (Usana Amphitheater) Murphy and the Giant (Piper Down Pub) Particle (The Cabin) Pixie and the Partygrass Boys (Garage on Beck) Too Slim and the Taildraggers + Cory Mon (Snowbird) Tribal Theory + Makisi + Roots Rawka (Urban Lounge) Under the Covers + Batshit Swayze (The Royal) Wild Country (Outlaw Saloon) Will Baxter Band (The Ruin) Live Trio (The Red Door) Spazmatics (Liquid Joe’s) Ziggy Marley (Dejoria Center)

Sky Saturdays w/ DJ Ikon (Sky) Top 40+ EDM + Alternative w/ DJ Twitch (Area 51)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE

LIVE MUSIC

Dueling Pianos feat. Troy, Drew & Jules (Tavernacle) DJ Dance Party (Club 90) DJ Handsome Hands (Bourbon House) DJ Latu (The Green Pig) DJ Joel (Twist) Gothic + Industrial + Dark 80s w/ DJ Courtney (Area 51)

KARAOKE

Areaoke DJ Kevin (Area 51) Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge) Karaoke w/ B-RAD (Club 90)

SUNDAY 6/17 LIVE MUSIC

J.S. Lawrence + Bill N Diane + Courtney Spaulding (Park Silly Sunday Market) Judd Warrick + Dan Weldon + Nate Robinson (Snowbird) Live Bluegrass (Club 90) Patrick Ryan (The Spur) Rick Gerber (Garage on Beck) Shannon Runyon (Legends at Park City Mountain) Sulane + Emma Park + Rebel Rebel + Silent Miles (Urban Lounge) Trashcan Sinatras (Metro Music Hall)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE Patio Party w/ Stereo Sparks (The Cabin)

KARAOKE

Karaoke (Tavernacle) Karaoke w/ DJ Benji (A Bar Named Sue) Kick Ass Karaoke (The Ice Haüs)

MONDAY 6/18 Amanda Johnson (The Spur) Barenaked Ladies + Better than Ezra + KT Tunstall (Red Butte Garden) Black Milk + Nat Turner (Urban Lounge) see p. 54 Chad Valley (Kilby Court) R.A. the Rugged Man + A-F-R-O (The Loading Dock) see p. 50

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE Open Blues Jam (The Green Pig) Open Mic (The Cabin)

KARAOKE

KARAOKE

Karaoke (Tavernacle) Karaoke w/ DJ Thom (A Bar Named Sue) Karaoke That Doesn’t Suck (Twist) Karaoke w/ KJ Johnny Irish (Club 90)

Karaoke (Poplar Street Pub) Karaoke Bingo (Tavernacle) Karaoke w/ DJ Benji (A Bar Named Sue)

WEDNESDAY 6/20

TUESDAY 6/19

Alicia Stockman (Park City Library) Belle and Sebastian + Japanese Breakfast (Sundance Summer Theatre) Brick + Mortar + The Unlikely Candidates (Kilby Court) Elliot & Gabriel (The Spur) Grave Gnosis + Bound For The Ground + Unceremonial + Tomb of Belial (The Loading Dock) Lucy Isabell (The Yes Hell) Nicki Bluhm + The Barefoot Movement (The State Room) see p. 49 Ninja Sex Party + TWRP (The Union Event Center) see p. 52 The Nods + The Heartlights + Opaline + Eleventh Door (Urban Lounge) Triggers & Slips (Deer Valley) XLR8 Band (Deer Valley Amphitheater)

LIVE MUSIC

Chicago + REO Speedwagon (Usana Amphitheatre) Chon + Polyphia + TTNG + Tricot (The Complex) Chrch + The Ditch & the Delta (Metro Music Hall) Dispatch + Nahko and Medicine for the People + Raye Zaragoza (Red Butte Garden) Filth + Insvrgence + Invoker + Zodiac Killer + Kira (The Loading Dock) Frank Turner & The Sleeping Souls + Lucero + The Menzingers + The Homeless Gospel Choir (The Complex) see p. 52 Patrick Ryan (The Spur)

Blues Jam (The Yes Hell) Open Jazz Jam (Bourbon House)

LIVE Music thursday, june 14

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ACROSS

1. Weed 6. Allen’s replacement on “The Tonight Show” 10. ____ Nostra 14. “What ____ in the neck!”

15. Slimming surgery, informally 16. Dye that makes blue jeans blue 17. Gibberish 19. What “I” or “me” refers to 20. City on the Seward Peninsula 21. Life ____ know it 22. Frozen aisle icon 29. “Ooky” TV family name 30. 1961 Michelangelo Antonioni drama 31. Polite rural reply 32. Floor 34. Pan Am rival 35. “Here’s where you wow them before the curtain falls!” (or what’s seen in 17-, 22-, 51- and 57-Across) 39. Mahershala ____, Oscar winner for “Moonlight” 42. Like many taste tests 43. Anthony Hopkins’ “Thor” role 47. Creature that carried Zeus’ thunderbolts 49. Undesirable condition 51. Clive Cussler bestseller made into a 1980 film 54. Kristoff’s reindeer in “Frozen” 55. Apt rhyme for “casino” 56. Many a Generation Z member, now 57. Generally 63. “Look ____” (Vince Gill hit) 64. Minus 65. Led Zeppelin’s “Whole ____ Love” 66. Pretty cool, in slang 67. Ancestry.com diagram 68. Cold shower?

12. Wrong start?

13. Sitcom character who was 229 years old 18. Does laps, maybe 21. Dancer de Mille 22. Johnny’s replacement on “The Tonight Show” 23. Words of tribute 24. The Mormons, for short 25. Shish kebab meat 26. Antelope with twisty horns 27. The Soup ___ (“Seinfeld” character) 28. Drink that’s often iced 32. Like ____ out of water 33. 60 secs.

36. “Hedda Gabler” playDOWN wright 1. Pinup’s leg 37. Overabundance 2. “The Problem with ____” (2017 docu38. “Buenos días!” mentary about a Simpsons character) 39. Earth Day’s mo.

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Last week’s answers

No math is involved. The grid has numbers, but nothing has to add up to anything else. Solve the puzzle with reasoning and logic. Solving time is typically 10 to 30 minutes, depending on your skill and experience.

CITYWEEKLYAUTOS.COM

BIG FINISH

BY DAVID LEVINSON WILK

Complete the grid so that each row, column, diagonal and 3x3 square contain all of the numbers 1 to 9.

60 | JUNE 14, 2018

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GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “Whether you love what you love or live in divided ceaseless revolt against it, what you love is your fate.” Gemini poet Frank Bidart wrote that in his poem “Guilty of Dust,” and now I offer it to you. Why? Because it’s an excellent time to be honest with yourself as you identify whom and what you love. It’s also a favorable phase to assess whether you are in any sense at odds with whom and what you love; and if you find you are, to figure out how to be in more harmonic alignment with whom and what you love. Finally, dear Gemini, now is a key moment to vividly register the fact that the story of your life in the coming years will pivot around your relationship with whom and what you love.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Each of us harbors rough, vulnerable, controversial or unhoned facets of our identity. And every one of us periodically reaches turning points when it becomes problematic to keep those qualities buried or immature. We need to make them more visible and develop their potential. I suspect you have arrived at such a turning point. So on behalf of the cosmos, I hereby invite you to enjoy a period of ripening and self-revelation. And I do mean “enjoy.” Find a way to have fun.

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JUNE 14, 2018 | 61

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): You have caressed and finessed The Problem. You have tickled and teased and tinkered with it. Now I suggest you let it alone for a while. Give it breathing room. Allow it to evolve under the influence of the tweaks you have instigated. Although you might need to return and do further work in a few weeks, my guess is that The Problem’s knots are now destined to metamorphose into seeds. The awkwardness you massaged with your love and care will eventually yield a useful magic.

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SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The temptation to overdramatize is strong. Going through with a splashy but messy conclusion might have a perverse appeal. But why not wrap things up with an elegant whisper instead of a garish bang? Rather than impressing everyone with how amazingly complicated your crazy life is, why not quietly lay the foundations for a low-key resolution that will set the stage for a productive sequel? Taking the latter route will be much easier on your karma, and in my opinion will make for just as interesting a story.

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CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): For the next two-plus weeks, an unusual rule will be in effect: The more you lose, the more you gain. That means you will have an aptitude for eliminating hassles, banishing stress, and shedCANCER (June 21-July 22): Congratulations on the work you’ve done to cleanse the psychic ding defense mechanisms. You’ll be able to purge emotional toxins from your soul, Cancerian. I love how brave you’ve been congestion that has been preventing clarity. You’ll have good as you’ve jettisoned outworn shticks, inadequate theories, and intuitions about how to separate yourself from influences that irrelevant worries. It makes my heart sing to have seen you sum- have made you weak or angry. I’m excited for you, Capricorn! mon the self-respect necessary to stick up for your dreams in the A load of old, moldy karma could dissolve and disperse in what face of so many confusing signals. I do feel a tinge of sadness that seems like a twinkling. If all goes well, you’ll be traveling much your heroism hasn’t been better appreciated by those around lighter by July 1. you. Is there anything you can do to compensate? Like maybe AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): intensify the appreciation you give yourself?

I suggest you avoid starting a flirtatious correspondence with a convict who’ll be in jail for another 28 years. OK? And don’t LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): I hope you’re reaching the final stages of your year-long project snack on fugu, the Japanese delicacy that can poison you if to make yourself as solid and steady as possible. I trust you have the cook isn’t careful about preparing it. Please? And don’t been building a stable foundation that will serve you well for participate in a séance where the medium summons the spirits at least the next five years. I pray you have been creating a rich of psychotic ancestors or diabolical celebrities with whom you sense of community and establishing vital new traditions and imagine it might be interesting to converse. Got that? I undersurrounding yourself with environments that bring out the best stand you might be in the mood for high adventure and out-ofin you. If there’s any more work to be done in these sacred tasks, the-ordinary escapades. And that will be fine and healthy as intensify your efforts in the coming weeks. If you’re behind long as you also exert a modicum of caution and discernment. schedule, please make up for lost time.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): I suggest that you pat yourself on the back with both hands as VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “Necessity is the mother of invention,” says an old proverb. In you sing your own praises and admire your own willful beauty other words, when your need for some correction or improve- in three mirrors simultaneously. You have won stirring victories ment becomes overwhelming, you might be driven to get cre- over not just your own personal version of the devil, but also ative. Engineer Allen Dale put a different spin on the issue. He over your own inertia and sadness. From what I can determine, said that “if necessity is the mother of invention, then laziness you have corralled what remains of the forces of darkness into is the father.” Sci-fi writer Robert Heinlein agreed, asserting a comfy holding cell, sealing off those forces from your future. that “progress is made by lazy men looking for easier ways They won’t bother you for a very long time, maybe never again. to do things.” I’m not sure if necessity or laziness will be your Right now you would benefit from a sabbatical—a vacation motivation, Virgo, but I suspect that the coming weeks could from all this high-powered character-building. May I suggest be a golden age of invention for you. What practical innovations you pay a restorative visit to the Land of Sweet Nonsense? might you launch? What useful improvements can you finagle?

(P.S. Philosopher Alfred North Whitehead attributed the pri- ARIES (March 21-April 19): mary drive for innovative ideas and gizmos to “pleasurable My Aries acquaintance Tatiana decided to eliminate sugar from her diet. She drew up a plan to avoid it completely for 30 days, intellectual curiosity.”) hoping to permanently break its hold over her. I was surprised to learn that she began the project by making a Dessert Altar in LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Would you have turned out wiser and wealthier if you had her bedroom, where she placed a chocolate cake and five kinds dropped out of school in third grade? Would it have been better of candy. She testified that it compelled her willpower to work to apprentice yourself to a family of wolves or coyotes rather than even harder and become even stronger than if she had excluded trusting your educational fate to institutions whose job it was to all sweet treats from her sight. Do you think this strenuous trick acclimate you to society’s madness? I’m happy to let you know might work for you as you battle your own personal equivalent that you’re entering a phase when you’ll find it easier than usual of a sugar addiction? If not, devise an equally potent strategy. to unlearn any old conditioning that might be suppressing your You’re on the verge of forever escaping a temptation that’s no ability to fulfill your rich potentials. I urge you to seek out oppor- good for you. Or you’re close to vanquishing an influence that has undermined you. Or both. tunities to unleash your skills and enhance your intelligence.

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62 | JUNE 14, 2018

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WITH BABS DELAY Broker, Urban Utah Homes & Estates, urbanutah.com Trustee, Utah Transit Authority

Bye Bye Birdies

I recently wrote about goats and the zoning required in order to keep them. Not much of Salt Lake County has agricultural zoning anymore, and now, the county council has voted to eliminate the agricultural zoning designation for a significant number of farms and livestock operations in South Jordan, Herriman, Riverton and West Jordan. You can drive out there now and still see thousands of acres of farmland, but make it quick as the army of bulldozers is on its way to turn wheat and pumpkin fields into housing, retail and offices.

The county council approved almost 8,800 new homes, apartments and buildings on about 1,000 acres, making it the densest housing on the southwest end of the valley. As of press time, that could change as the council has decided to vote again on whether to amend or rescind its decision next week. No, this isn’t the Daybreak folks expanding (although they are, and they will). Known as the Olympia development project, it’s a response to Utah’s housing crunch and will include 4,783 apartments, 2,485 townhouses and 1,497 single-family homes on quarter-acre lots.

The Daybreak community has grown to approximately 15,000 residents, with more than 4,500 new homes completed in their master plan. They project 20,000 more homes by the time their phases of construction are built out. Daybreakliving.com reported that 811 homes were sold there in 2017 at a median price of $389,000 for a single-family residence and $259,900 for townhomes and condos.

Basically, the Olympia project is going to be about two-thirds the size of what Daybreak is right now, and located on mostly farmland between 6300 and 8500 West and 12400 to 13100 South. That kind of growth will impact roads, traffic and infrastructure like a hot lava flow from Kilauea. Bye bye bunnies and birds, bovines and ovines and AG zoning. Hello SUVs, stucco and sidewalks. But then, haven’t we seen this before with the NSA and the Silicon Slopes wave of tech companies? Facebook is being given possibly $150 million in tax breaks to locate south of the NSA in Eagle Mountain, and though there will only be reportedly 50 employees, there will be more roads, businesses and office space built.

Utah has been discovered and we’re being bulldozed. Think of the zombies in the movie World War Z: hoards of them coming our way very fast. So long sleepy towns; hello suburban nightmares. n Content is prepared expressly for Community and is not endorsed by City Weekly staff.

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It’s a Dead Language In Charleston, S.C., Cara Koscinski and her whole family were looking forward to her son Jacob’s May 19 graduation party. The Post and Courier reported he had excelled in his Christian-based homeschool program, earning a 4.79 GPA and the summa cum laude distinction, an honor Koscinski included in the wording on the cake she ordered online from her local Publix store. When the software informed her “profane/special characters (are) not allowed,” Koscinski made clear that phrase was Latin, meaning “with the highest distinction,” and even included a link to a website explaining it. Still, when the cake arrived, it read: “Congratulations Jacob! Summa --- laude Class of 2018.”

Jacob was embarrassed, and Koscinski had to tell her 70-yearold mother why the store had censored the word. Publix offered to remake the cake, but as Koscinski noted, “You only graduate once.”

BY T HE EDITO R S AT A ND RE WS M cMEEL

Police, Ellis became upset after Ernst repeatedly talked while she tried to watch a TV show, telling him to “shut up.”

When he responded with an expletive, she went to the kitchen for a knife, reported Fox News. Police said Ellis had threatened Ernst with a knife about 10 times in the last couple of months, but he had been able to get the knife away from her. Ellis told an officer that “she has anger problems and she just got extremely upset tonight.”

WEIRD

Least Competent Criminals Comrades in arms Mike Mulligan, Michael Martin and Emma St. Claire made the mistake of leaving their burglary booty visible in their car in Nevada City, Calif. So on May 16, when they were stopped by a Grass Valley Police officer, the prosthetic arm officers spotted pointed the finger at them as the perpetrators of a Nevada County home burglary the previous week. On its Facebook page, the Nevada County Sheriff’s office described the limb as “the exact arm that was stolen in the burglary.” All three were booked into the Wayne Brown Correctional Facility in Nevada City, Fox News reported, and the arm has been returned to a “very appreciative owner.” n Deputy Henry Guzman with the Broward County Sheriff’s Office in Florida made his first mistake when he shoplifted— three days in a row—from a Lauderdale Lakes Walmart. His second, and perhaps more devastating, mistake was wearing his uniform while doing so. Guzman, a 13-year veteran of the department, stole DVDs and “Star Wars” action figures valued at about $200, WSVN reported. He was arrested on May 21 and charged with three misdemeanor counts of petty theft.

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n In Lawrence, Kan., architecture students designed a new bike rack for the Prairie Acre Ribbon Classroom, the first outdoor classroom at the University of Kansas. The metal rack features the letters P-A-R-C, but viewed from another vantage point, they spell C-R-A-P. Social media lit up after a photo was posted May 13, including, “It’ll make a fine bike rack. Crap a diem!”

Project PARC KU responded: “The photograph shown is not the intended vantage point, nor is it the message of our project,” but at press time, the university had not announced any action, according to The Wichita Eagle.

Government in Action Lake Worth, Fla., residents were startled to receive a power outage alert on May 20 that also warned of a “zombie alert for residents of Lake Worth and Terminus,” a possible reference to a city in the TV show “The Walking Dead,” reported by the Palm Beach Post. “There are now far less than 7,380 customers involved due to extreme zombie activity,” the message continued. “We are looking into reports that the system mentioned zombies,” city communications specialist Ben Kerr said. “I want to reiterate that Lake Worth does not have any zombie activity currently and apologize for the system message.”

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JUNE 14, 2018 | 63

The Naked Truth In Huntsville, Ark., police responded to a call at 4 a.m. on May 21 from a homeowner who said a tattooed man was ringing his doorbell. The man left, but police identified him from the security video as Robert Conn, 31, and soon caught up with him after a motorist on nearby Huntsville Bridge reported seeing a naked man lying face down in the road. When police arrived, they told KFSM TV, Conn was talking to himself and acting as if being naked in public was normal. He was charged with disorderly conduct.

Babs De Lay

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What a Crock!

As it negotiated a roundabout in Paisley, Renfrewshire, Scotland, a dump truck filled with manure lost its balance on May 21 and tipped over, spilling its load onto a Peugot 208 with the driver inside. A witness said he “couldn’t believe anyone got out alive,” but the male driver was able to crawl through the pile of excrement and was unhurt, if stinky, Metro News reported.

The car, however, “was crushed,” according to a Police Scotland spokesman.

n Dymund Ellis, 19, was charged with stabbing and killing her roommate, Jace Trevon Ernst, 25, in North Las Vegas, Nev., after a May 4 argument. According to North Las Vegas

Julie “Bella” De Lay

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Oops!

Lyons, N.Y., resident Jesse Graham, 53, must have been surprised when deputies of the Wayne County Sheriff’s Department appeared at his door on May 11. WHEC TV reported that Graham, a fugitive wanted by the Mooresville (North Carolina) Police Department, had apparently accidentally dialed 911, summoning the deputies himself. Graham was charged with being a fugitive from justice and possession of marijuana, and he awaits extradition to North Carolina.

Anger Management Frustration with the cable company boiled over in Ridgewood, N.J., on May 7, when a dispute between an Optimum employee and a woman left the cable worker stranded on high. While the employee was in an elevated bucket working on lines, northjersey.com reported, a 59-year-old woman turned off the truck and “took utility property” before walking away, making it impossible for the worker to lower the bucket. Ridgeview police charged the woman with harassment, false imprisonment, disorderly conduct and criminal trespassing.

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Ironies Police officers in North Ridgeville, Ohio, were sure the man who called them at 5:26 a.m. on May 19 to report being followed by a pig was impaired and hallucinating. But sure enough, the Associated Press reported, officers on the scene found a completely sober man, walking home from the Elyria Amtrak station with a pig trailing behind him. The department’s Facebook page reported that Patrolman Kuduzovic wrangled the oinker into the back seat of his cruiser and later secured it in the station’s dog kennels, where the owner later retrieved it. “Also,” the post noted, “we will mention the irony of the pig in a police car now so that anyone that thinks they’re funny is actually unoriginal and trying too hard.” Touché.

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