EMPOWERING YOU TO EMPOWER YOURSELF
COCOA THE CHOCOLATIER CHEF
TONY'S
SPECIALTY Â IS
NEW
RESTAURAN
NOW
OPEN
08
The Shortage of Men in the Church Teddy A. Jones
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Meet Brian Ganges Hurley Morgan
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Men vs, Women Impact on Spiritual Growth Roger Himes
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Debt and Money Management Differences between Men and Women Rebecca Sophia Meade
JULY/AUGUST ISSUE 2019
REAL LIFE REAL FAITH MEN OF FAITH
Editor in Chief Cheryl Lacey Donovan Publisher Elissa Gabrielle Senior Editors Hurley Morgan Cee Cee H. Caldwell Columnists Leroy McKenzie Alvin C. Romer Hurley Morgan Bryant Lewis Teddy A Jones Rebecca Sophia Meade Roger Himes
Designer Cheryl Lacey Donovan
EDITORIAL OFFICES P.O. Box 450121 Houston, Texas 77245 832-827-4438
SUBSCRIPTIONS (832) 827-4438
. realliferealfaithmagazine.net
Editor's Note
Greetings Despite the fact that we have left the seasons of Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, we still want to take the time to celebrate mothers and fathers! Men, we have a role to play with both of these important days of celebration. We need to celebrate our women not only on Mother’s Day but every day of the year. Just as we are to celebrate our women, we too have the responsibility to celebrate one another as well every day. We are very thankful for those holidays, but as men we must be year-long champions in our roles. We must on a daily basis embrace our mothers and not only protect them but support them with the love and strength that we all have instilled in us. Our jobs go beyond the women as well for we must uplift each other and hold each other accountable on a daily basis to be better fathers to our children, husbands to our wives….stronger foundations to our communities. One of our goals at MOF continues to be to constantly remind you of our duty as men. Each month we strive to feature an influential individual from the community that reflects our values and goals in the community. This month we bring to you Brother Brian Ganges, business owner of The Construction Initiative (TCI), business consultant and mentor, writer and published author. Brother Brian Ganges is a very positive influence in his community that is worth looking up and learning more about. At MOF, we continue to strive to bring to you content that is very relevant to what is going on in the country today, especially those things that are important to our communities. From inspiration, to entertainment, to sports, to politics, to business, to mental health, and everything in between…we strive to educate, uplift, motivate, inspire, and create a magazine that is by men for men. We seek to cultivate minds with insightful and entertaining knowledge that is meant to help someone in need of food for thought. Remember…knowledge is KEY! Our mission…is to address an array of topics that men not only want to hear about but also need to hear about. We will always cater to you! Much Love! Hurley Morgan Senior Managing Editor
THE SHORTAGE OF MEN IN THE CHURCH Teddy A. Jones "De Man dem short and de ooman dem plenty"It Nuh Pretty at allWelcome to Man Short Church, the statistically average US congregation. This week:• Man Short Church will draw an adult congregation that's 61 percent female, 39 percent male.• Almost 25 percent of the married women who attend Man Short will do so without their husbands.• Man Short will attract a healthy number of single women, but few single men.• About 90 percent of the boys who are raised in church abandon it during their teens and twenties. Most never return.• This Sunday in America, six million married women will worship without their husbands. That's one out of five.• Most churchgoing guys are "lifers" who grew up in church. Men are the hardest group to reach. • Less than 10 percent of churches can maintain a thriving men's ministry. The majority of men who actually show up for Sunday worship are there in body only. Their hearts just aren't in it. Few will do anything during the week to nurture their faith.Man Short Church is the norm in Christianity - in the U.S., and around the world. Your church profile is probably similar. In today's church, women are the participators, men, the spectators.How did we get here? How did a faith founded by a man and his 12 male disciples become like a the worse curse to men? Why do Christian churches around the world experience a chronic shortage of males, when temples and mosques do not? Why are churchgoing men so hesitant to really live their faith, when men of other religions willingly die for theirs? In "The Church Impotent: The Feminization of Christianity" Leon Poddles quotes from a man he spoke with on the streets: "Life is a football game, with the men fighting it out on the gridiron, while the minister is up in the grandstand, explaining it to the ladies."
THE EFFECTS OF THE LACK OF MEN IN THE CHURCH A lack of male participation is not only heartbreaking, it's strongly associated with overall church decline. Over the long term, a lack of men will doom a congregation. The gender gap is associated with church decline, according to the latest studies. The denominations with the fewest men (per capita) are also those that have been losing members and shutting churches. On the other hand, churches with robust male participation are generally growing.The problem of criminality and drug abuse among inner-city black men is a problem of the distortion of masculinity. The low numbers of men in means the church would be not be properly positioned to help black men attain the status they so desperately need for their own good and the good of black women and children: that of patriarchs, responsible fathers who rule their families in justice and love.This has also helped to cause Christianity to be dismissed as irrelevant and unimportant. Other effects include Reduced evangelistic ability as far as males are concerned Perpetuation of the cycle of confusion as it relates to defining Biblical manhood.Reduces the mate selection pool for the females Reduces the credibility of Christianity. WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT IT Men are the world's largest un-reached people group. They have their own language, culture and unique needs. It's clear that the church has ignored these needs far too long. 1. UNDERSTAND WHY MEN HATE GOING TO CHURCH Look at it from a sociological perspective. What other behaviors do men avoid? What other venues make men uncomfortable?
The answer is obvious: in our society, men avoid any behavior (or venue) that might call their manhood into question. For example, men don't go to baby showers, fabric stores or "chick flicks." So it is with church: men believe, deep in their hearts, that church is a women's thing. Men approach Christianity with the same apathy or discomfort they display when forced to watch a Meg Ryan film. It just doesn't resonate with them. We need to Become students of men. The truth is many pastors have built their ministries on their ability to interact with women. Because men are so unneeded for church work, ministers have had little incentive to go after them. A good place to start: read John Eldredge's bestseller, Wild at Heart.John Eldredge says it best: men are wild at heart. Though men see the goodness of the Christian faith, they are not swept up in it because church life is so soft and sweet. The cautious, sensitive culture of today's church fails to match the adventurous spirit found in most men. 2. Get rid of the symbols that suggest that the church building is feminine territory like the pictures of gentle Jesus meek and mild in a white dress. Stop sending Nick signals that church is for women. From the moment he walks into the sanctuary, Nick must sense that this is something for him, not just something for his grandma, his wife and his kids. Examine everything about your church: the dÊcor, the vocabulary you use, the songs you sing, the behaviors you expect. Men will respond if you meet them halfway. 3. Present Jesus as the real hero role model that he is. For this to happen there should be more focus on the manliness of Jesus. The blue-eyed effeminate-looking wimpish white Jesus made famous in a painting by Michelangelo will not do (especially if He is seen holding that lamb). Here are my suggestions: the Jesus who cracks the whip at the money changers in the temple; the Jesus who embraced martyrdom to bring salvation; the Jesus who is a winner; who spoiled principalities and powers and made a show of them openly; the Jesus who will rule the world with justice one day; the kingly Jesus who proclaims and demonstrates the Kingdom of God; the Jesus who spoke harshly to scribes and Pharisees calling them 'white-washed sepulchers.' http://www.jamaicagleaner.com/gleaner/20020421/relig/relig1.html ] 4. Plan worship experiences that are deliberately masculine focused. Women do masculine, but men DO NOT do feminine. This is why we need to tip the balance toward the masculine spirit in worship. That's the format most likely to make everyone comfortable. Helping men worship. With men, it's all about quality. Men appreciate good music from talented musicians, played in their vocal range. When possible, choose songs with masculine lyrics. Many of today's praise songs feature lovey-dovey words set to a romantic tune. Nick may feel uncomfortable singing these words to Jesus, a man who lives today. Also, whenever possible, move men outside for worship. There's nothing like a bonfire and a starry night to connect a man and his Maker. 5. Meet their deepest needs: Men need spiritual fathers and a band of brothers.A spiritual father is simply a layman who takes responsibility for bringing other men to maturity in the faith. It's based on the discipleship models of Jesus and Paul (1 Cor. 4:1415) 5). If you really want to bring men to life in Christ, spiritual fathering is how it's done.Second, every man needs a band of brothers. Jesus began his ministry by assembling a team. They trained together, worked together, and suffered together. Men cannot succeed as followers of Jesus without a team surrounding them. No matter how meaty the sermons, no matter how rich their quiet times men will not come to maturity to Christ without a band of brothers surrounding them, and a spiritual father to guide them. Most churches offer nothing in the way of men's ministry or small groups. What a tragedy. Although it's initially hard to engage men in a small group, once they do get involved, they're usually hooked. Their faith deepens. Their lives change. 6. We need to understand the qualities of maleness and femaleness. Males and females are different and this is borne out by both Scripture and science. In his book, 'The Masculine Journey", Robert Hicks examines six Hebrew words that are used to define males. These six words, he argues, form the stages of a man's life. a. adam describes the CREATIONAL MALE b. zakar describes the SEXUAL MALE c. gibbor describes the MALE AS WARRIOR d. enosh describes the WOUNDED MALE e. ish describes the MATURE MALE f. zaken describes the WISE MALE OR SAGE Other than the first word 'adam all these words are used distinctively to describe males alone.
7. We must understand the cultural context in which our youth males grow, develop and live. Cultural practices vary from place to place and thus the impact on persons will vary. Our cultural context can be described, in part by two simple phrases:a) no father b) nuff "mothers"These two factors have created many wounds in both males and females (the father wound and the mother wound) and a crisis in understanding themselves. The impact varies from person to person and is somewhat different for males than it is for females. 8. We must also know how to relate to males as males.Relating to males:We live in a very homophobic culture where close relationships with other males are often suspect and where even when males try they find it difficult to relate to each other. We offer some simple guidelines:a. understand that males relate around what they DO together b. males prefer action to conversation. males find it uncomfortable to be vulnerable effective relating to males requires you to learn to "flex"e. you will have to meet a man on his turf before you can move or guide him to where you want him to be. 9. We must provide a context in which males can release and realize their essential nature without the criticism of females and where they can learn from responsible male models who can provide experiences and ceremonies that will nurture and mark their development. 10. For churches to attract and retain men, they need to intentionally develop masculine modes of doing evangelism and pastoral care. E.g. Sports Evangelism. The church must deliberately tailor its evangelistic efforts to win men. What obtains at present is that evangelistic meetings try to win everybody and invariably end up with a handful of men at best and a ton-load of women and children. That is perhaps where the church has gone wrong. 11. You must put a high priority on developing leaders, especially male ones. Men are not looking for theologians, teachers or facilitators. They are looking for men who will lead them to greatness." Men need great leadership. Men are drawn by vision and purpose, by achievement and power. Churches that attract enthusiastic men do so by taking risks, dreaming big, and bringing a measure of adventure back to the Christian life. 12. Take risks and develop ministries that have a danger factor because men are adventurous and risk takers. Other Considerations Men love technology. "Information conveyed through the use of technology often has a higher degree of believability than does information coming directly out of the speaker's mouth. "Men love excellence and quality. "Men are turned off by mediocrity, amateurish music, worn-out facilities, and unkempt grounds. Men love the outdoors. Plan activities to be held in the outdoors as much as is possible. Men feel closer to God when they are outdoors. Men love adventure. Men are transformed more by what they experience and less by what they are told. Helping men learn. Men's brains are less verbal than women's, so they require a different approach. Men have been trained to focus for 6 to 8 minutes (the length between TV commercials). The lengthy monologue sermon, so effective in the Victorian era, fails to reach today's men. Rick Warren of the Purpose Driven Church may have an answer: he frequently breaks his sermons into 5 to 7 minute chunks, with a video, drama or song between each segment. And object lessons are essential: never take the pulpit without an object in hand. Jesus called these parables, and they survive to this day because men remembered them. Effective pastors and teachers draw metaphors and illustrations from the realms of sports, business, battle and survival.Helping men serve. Roger from Ohio says, "If serving in the church was more about pounding nails and less about wiping runny noses, I'd probably be interested."
Men will gladly serve if we let them do what they're good at. Why not work on cars? One Illinois church has an on-site auto repair facility, staffed by volunteers, that benefits single mothers and the working poor. Even a small church can offer free oil changes in the church parking lot. Our congregation started doing this twice a year; the event attracts more than fifty guys who give up a Saturday morning to serve God. What's more remarkable, we almost always get a few nonreligious husbands of churchgoing wives.
A clear mission for every church. Most church mission statements are rambling and non-specific. Men are drawn to clarity and brevity. If they're going to give up their weekend, they want to know why. High moral standards. Family men are looking for a church that's different from the world they see on TV. This is why conservative churches are growing and liberal ones are dying. Few men are drawn to squishy morals. They want a church built on a firm, time-tested bedrock. Men need help and backup enforcing morals at home. Children today are bombarded with immoral messages. Men feel powerless against MTV, South Park and the Internet. Churches should train men how to deal with these situations - how to say no to sin in a loving way. www.churchformen.com/?p=203 Why Men Flock to Islam Develop a culturally relevant, Biblically grounded, practical affirmation of a sexuality The church and Christian radio have failed to support a married man's need for regular sexual intimacy with his wife, which is an insult and a betrayal. We are men, not eunuchs. Skype: ghettopriest1Home Page: http://www.TeddyAJones.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6727189
R E A L
M E N
P R A Y
BRIAN
Ganges
Brian Ganges Brian Ganges has more than twenty years of commercial construction experience and through his company, “The Construction Initiative” (TCI), he provides consulting services to commercial builders and end-users. (TCI) also has a mentorship component that provides a valuable service where a safe space for men is concerned. Through transparency and care, Brian teaches men how to process and walk through real-life struggles, such as: self-identity and leadership issues, life purpose, being free from pornography, emotional management, living a balanced life, and raising children in the 21st century.
Brian is also a writer and the author of the
upcoming book, “OPTIMANZATION® (The Science of Integration: spirit, soul, and body).” While this book can be enjoyed by both genders, Brian’s goal is to help men discover their human birthright to be king and protector of his home and territory, provider, marketplace leader, and the foundation of his family. In addition to “OPTIMANZATION®,” other upcoming programs and a workbook series, entitled: “Soul Training,” will be released to help individuals walk through simple exercises and instructions that will help them develop the selfawareness and confidence necessary to identify some of the counter-productive, (cultural and/or societal) auto-pilot mental GPS programming that has produced less then desirable results in their lives. Once selfawareness is achieved, people will be able to set their own autopilot mental GPS coordinates with intention en route to their desired destination. We’re winning this generation one soul at a time!
Jimmie continued to pursue his education, earning three associates degrees as well as numerous certificates while incarcerated. He also continued to shine athletically in softball, weight lifting, and basketball. He taught himself the law and worked tirelessly to secure his freedom, while serving as a representative for other prisoners during legal proceedings.
Three years after Jimmie’s conviction, an investigation launched by the West Virginia Supreme Court determined that the State’s key witness, Chief Forensics & DNA Expert-Fred Zain, had presented false evidence and testimony in over 140 cases. The Supreme Court ordered that those who had been convicted on the basis of Zain’s falsified evidence and testimony were entitled to a hearing to determine if they were eligible for release or retrial. Despite this ruling, six repeated petitions, and the 13 different lawyers assigned to his case, Jimmie was denied a hearing or any other relief for the next 23 years.
1n 1995, Zain was indicted and tried for perjury for giving false testimony. The trial ended in a mistrial. Later, in 1998, Zain was indicted for his actions in Jimmie’s case and those of two others. He was also charged with knowingly obtaining money under false pretenses. The case went to trial in September 2001. After the events of September 11, 2001, the case ended in mistrial. Zain was to be retried but died before his victims could see justice done. Through all of this, Jimmie remained in prison.
Finally, after reviewing a motion
Jimmie wrote and filed himself, the US District Court for the Southern
District of West Virginia held that Jimmie’s conviction was a total miscarriage of justice and that he had been held in legal purgatory for 27 years. The court vacated the conviction and he was released from custody on April 1, 2016. It would take another five months, but prosecutors formally dropped all charges against Jimmie on September 7, 2016.
Since his release, Jimmie C. Gardner has become an advocate for other wrongfully imprisoned and overincarcerated men and women. He is an advocate for criminal justice reform and inmate rights. One of Jimmie’s passions is the development of Gardner House, a reentry home designed to help returning citizens who might not have the family support and resources necessary to make a successful return into society.
As a motivational speaker, Jimmie has shared his message of positive thinking and resilience with students in secondary school and college, sports teams, churches, and community organizations. Jimmie also visits prisons, offering insight, hope, and encouragement. Additionally, while the Innocence Project did not secure Jimmie’s release, he has become active with the organization, participating in their annual conference and the National Exonoree March and serving as a mentor to recently exonerated persons who are adjusting to their new lives.
Jimmie continues to live life to the fullest. He recently married US District Court Judge Leslie Abrams Gardner and joined the illustrious brotherhood of Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity.
Jimmie C. Gardner's positivity and endurance are a testament to his faith, his upbringing, and his unconquerable spirit. He sees everyday as a blessing from God and lives his life to help others attain the spiritual, mental, and physical health that are the keys to happiness and success in life
For more information, please visit https://www.jcgardnerspeaks.com.
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interview with brian ganges MOF: It’s our honor having you…how are things going for you these days? Brother Brian Ganges: Thank you for reaching out and having me; it’s good to connect with you. Things are going well. I’m growing; my mind is expanding, and I have received a lot of clarity over the past few years and particularly this year. Remember the old school televisions that had the UHF and VHF channels, the rabbit-ear antenna, and the fine-tune knob? That’s a childhood imagery meant to convey the message that things, my life/vision, my purpose and function, and life in general are becoming clearer for me. MOF: What has been your biggest inspiration in life? What drives you to do what you do? Brother Brian Ganges: A lot of things inspire me, but the biggest inspiration for me is the discovery of truth. Truth is one of those things that causes you to grow in the pursuit of it. So with each new discovery about myself, life, relationships, the Scriptures, human nature, reality, science, etc., I feel invigorated for the next challenging discovery. This invigorating feeling drives me because it is the application of the truth that yields the desired results we seek. And I can always improve upon some area of my life and bear more fruit. MOF: You have over 2 decades of commercial construction experience. You have your own business, The Construction Initiative (TCI), where you serve as a consultant and mentor. You are also a published author. Of all that you do, what do you find the most pleasure in doing? Brother Brian Ganges: Teaching is my gift and construction is just a vehicle through which I connect with people and use/teach the principles of life. I always ask people “if every job on Earth paid $5.00 hourly, which job would you select?” A question like this gets down passed the shallow of chasing money and causes people to tap into and operate in their passion/gift. I have to make sure that I check myself from time to time and make sure that I am on the right path with the right motivation.
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MOF: Speaking of books, you have a new book coming out soon called OPTIMANZATION ®. Tell us a little about OPTIMANZATION®.
Brother Brian Ganges: OPTIMANZATION® as a book title is the blending of two words: optimization (the process of something functioning as effectively as possible) and manhood. So I desire to get men to function on the highest levels possible. The book is a culmination of life principles, Scripture, history, self-discovery, science, practical application, results, and accountability. It’s probably unlike any book you’ve seen before, and it is not for the weak of heart. Passive churchgoers or those who thrive on being entertained will not find much value in this book. Only those who are hungry for the truth and are open-minded will find value in OPTIMANZATION ®. MOF: I see that you also have other programs that will be coming and a workbook series, entitled: “Soul Training”. Please tell the readers a little bit of what to expect with these programs and workbook series. Brother Brian Ganges: “Soul Training” is where the work is done. What I have found to be true is that you can have an emotional experience at church, and you can still be an emotional wreck and soulishly immature. There are too many cases of soulish immaturity in churches and among secular circles, as well. People don’t know how to process feelings and emotions. Many times, people can’t take criticism or being called a name. It’s unfortunate, but those are realities of life that we must be prepared to handle. “Soul Training” provides serious students and truthseekers with the tools, exercises, and insights necessary to get them from where they are (in their soul) to where they want to go.
MOF: In the light of all the pain, suffering, and hate that you can see, nowadays pretty much everywhere you turn…what is it that you would like to see happen to make things better for not only African Americans but everyone? Brother Brian Ganges: One of the main problems is that people have a tendency to look to others or to wait for others to act and make things right. That is counter-productive and disempowering. I believe that knowledge is power, and knowledge of self is self-empowerment. So if you know who you are, why you are here, and what you can do, (in my opinion) that is all the empowerment one
aneeds to take control of one’s destiny. For too long, we’ve waited for friends, family members, politicians, pastors, etc. to make us whole or happy. That’s the antiquated way of doing things. We can do things as a collective and make things right, but again, we can’t wait for everyone to get the revelation. Waiting on others might take years for them to take action. But once an individual knows the way, he/she should act, and be a trailblazer for truth.
MOF: It seems like a lot of the issues from the prior question impacts the political landscape. What is your opinion on how politicians can actually help “Make America Great” and fix the problems instead of simply talking about fixing the problems? Do you have any ambitions of getting into the political game? Brother Brian Ganges: America or any country for that matter, is only as great as its inhabitants. Politicians are not taking their respective seats of office by force, they are all duly elected by the will and consent of the constituents. The people elected President Obama. The people elected President Trump. So fixing the problems of this country is as simple as a long, deep look in the mirror and ask the one you see some tough questions, like: “What can I change or influence to make things better in my sphere of influence? Am I the best version of myself? What would this district look like if everyone lived their lives like I live mine?” We need more introspection and less participation in the blame game. We know what the problems are; the media stirs people up to recite them everyday. We need more solutionminded people who will work towards a brighter day devoid of division, hate, political alliances, and prejudice. That can’t happen unless we all look in the mirror and sincerely ask ourselves if we have been a part of the problem or the solution. I currently have no ambition to join the political melee. I believe that I am called to raise the consciousness of people through teaching, interaction, and discipleship. Personally, doing this work as a politician would grant me a greater platform quicker, but it would also constrict me and cause me to surrender much of my liberty to speak and act freely. MOF: You are doing so much these days and accomplishing some great things. If you had to pick an accomplishment that stands out the most which would you pick and why? Brother Brian Ganges: This might sound strange, but coming to the realization and accepting the fact that I was wrong in some areas of my life was a great accomplishment for me, because it killed my ego which was taking me in the wrong direction. Defeating the ego gave me a fighting chance to win at life. For many years, I was able to navigate life and enjoy a level of success. But at what cost? That humility and introspection helped to give me a fresh start at selfdiscovery.
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MOF: Outside of a hard-working business man and an author what else can we find you doing? Any hobbies? Brother Brian Ganges: I am an avid reader and student. I enjoy learning new things, whether it’s science, about birds, herbal supplements, the human brain, or how to care for my lawn; I always enjoy learning new things. Regarding more fun things, I do like going on walks/runs. I enjoy watching and playing sports, and trying great restaurants.I’m sort of a foodie, too. MOF: Of course, you know the title of the magazine is Men of Faith Magazine. With all the challenges that men face in today’s society, especially men of color, what words of advice can you give any man that may be going through something in their life right now? Brother Brian Ganges: Wow, many things. First, you have to challenge your own belief systems and the reality in which we live. While facts can change, the truth is constant; sometimes our own biases, prejudices, traditions, cultures, and outright error in thought and training (in some areas) can cloud our minds and cause us to quite possibly miss the truth. Don’t assume that the crowd is right. Don’t assume that the people who look like you are right. Don’t assume anything, ever. The standard belief use to be that the Earth was the center of the universe. We now know that is a lie, but it was believed by the masses as the truth. Challenge your spiritual beliefs. Challenge your cultural beliefs. Challenge the history lessons you’ve been taught. Challenge your political beliefs. Ask questions, see things from another perspective, open your mind, spend some time in a quiet place, and be a leader instead of a follower. Read some sound books, listen to good podcasts, and stop watching 3-12 hours of television each day. Write down some real goals and imagine yourself accomplishing those goals. There are so many more productive things we could be doing with our time. Do them, today! MOF: It has been a real pleasure having you. We would love to be able to keep up with you in order to show support. Tell the readers how they can keep up with what’s going on with you? Brother Brian Ganges: When the new book and materials come out, we’ll create new ways to connect, but in the meantime, I can always be reached on Facebook and brianganges.com
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Women Vs. Men Impact on Spiritual Growth Roger Himes
Gender differences between men and women are unique. This effects spirituality and spiritual growth like you can't imagine. A best selling book describes these differences: "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus." I'll address these gender differences -- these differences between men and women -- more in Part 2 of this article, as I do in a book that my wife Eileen assisted me in writing a few years ago: "WOMEN: Called to be Fathers of the Gospel." Now, let's see how the gender of men, and that of women, are different in spiritual thinking. Let's see how 'men are from Mars,' and 'women are from Venus' - in Christian living. GENDER DIFFERENCES Women and men are strikingly different in how they think about life. Men think in terms of success achievement, and women don't. Men think in terms of ruling and conquering, and women don't. This was predicted by God back in Genesis 3, when he said to Eve: "Your desire shall be for your husband, but he shall rule over you." Women most often don't think in terms of controlling and ruling men, but it's also true I have met some women who were very controlling. There is a difference between head and heart thinking. Men think with their heads -- women with their hearts. Men concoct life in a 'formula' type of thinking: A plus B equals C. This allows them to achieve what they think they want, and their minds then create steps to achieve their goal. This gives them satisfaction. They create a 'paradigm' in their thinking that allows them to visualize steps, and map out a formula to get them to the destination they want to arrive at. HOW DOES THIS RELATE TO THE OLD AND NEW TESTAMENTS? Men like a structured type of Old Testament thinking. This means they like rules that work, and principles and precepts they can count on to get them what they want. They relate to DOING something so they are GETTING something in return. The business world calls it 'ROI' -- return on investment. They think if they do good they will be blessed. If they do bad then they won't be blessed, and God won't favor them. It's a very practical type of thinking. Women relate more personally. They think more in terms of love and grace, which are New Testament truths taught by Jesus.
The Old Testament is a rule book. It started with one rule in the Garden of Eden. This progressed to 10 rules at Mount Sinai. Then the Pharisees introduced about 700 more rules. Men relate to this because rules can produce results. Their minds can comprehend this. Men's minds relate to this type thinking. They are on home turf here, and they are in their environment. THE HEART VS. THE HEAD Women tend to relate from their heart, not their head. Men relate more from their head, not their heart. Women don't think so much in terms of RULES that will produce a RESULT. In fact, they know that RULES usually destroy RELATIONSHIP. The more rules you have, the less relationship is needed. We men like to visualize the end result: the goal and the destination. Women tend to see more of the journey that will lead them to the end result they desire. Neither men nor women stand in concrete! We can both move and change! I know men who think more like women (I've been accused of this myself). Some women think more like men. As a Christian counselor who has given up on counseling and has now become a gospel life coach, I can testify that this is the way things are. Nothing is absolute. But there are tendencies. Let me reiterate something I've already said: generally speaking, men live in their heads, but women live more in their hearts. This means that it is RELATIONSHIP thinking that drives women (God said: "Your desire shall be for your husband"). But men are more RATIONAL in their thinking (God says the tendency of men will be to rule over their wives). THE PROCESS OF RELATIONSHIP vs. THE PROGRAM OF RESULTS Women like the PROCESS of romance (or if you prefer: relationship) -- whether with God or with their man. They want to know how the two of them work together to achieve a desired end and to bring about a good ways and means. Men are more PROGRAM driven and motivated: "Let's get the job done." Their reasoning tells them if they can work the PROGRAM, then they will get what they want and achieve their goals.
What this boils down to is that men are more OLD Testament based, and women are more NEW Testament based. Men, and Old Testament thinking, was very 'cause and effect' driven. "If I steal I may go to jail." -- "If I commit adultery, I may get AIDS, or I may get divorced or even murdered." Men know if they kick the dog, or the cat, they may get scratched or even bitten. It's a very cause and effect type thinking. It's very 'matter of fact.' It's a thinking that is very functional and practical. Part two of this series will follow. Here, as THE GOSPEL COACH, I'll show you why the gospel is much easier for women than it is for men. In many cases, I'd much more deal with women than with men. Why? It's because women more readily relate to Jesus' FINISHED work, which is about relationship with both God and man. Men relate more to what he is going to do in the FUTURE. His finished work produces RELATIONSHIP, but his future work focuses on RESULTS. The gospel is the power of God in your daily life! Visit http://www.TheGospelCoach.com for free articles, ebooks, videos -- all about the practical experience of the finished work of the cross of Jesus, and what it means to us today. Subscribe to The Gospel Coach on Twitter /TheGospelCoach [http://www.RogerHimesLifeCoach-GospelTransformation.com] ·
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/7250585
2019
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DEBT AND MONEY MANAGEMENT DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN REBECCA SOPHIA MEADE
In today's tough economy, it seems pretty normal
Most women spend for fashion accessories,
to have debt. Most people today, regardless of
dress, bags and shoes. Meanwhile, men spend
their financial status, are into debt. In many times,
most of their money on electronics, gadgets,
financial decisions are based on emotion rather
cars, liquor drinking, eating out and sports
than logic. The question now is, who have more
tickets. It is believed that women tend to
debts, men or women? What factors are behind
overspend due to societal influence and
this interesting phenomenon?
pressure to stay in fashion while most men
Statistics on Debt and Money Management Between Men and Women According to research, there is a significant difference between how men and women generate economic decisions. Their economic choices are actually influenced by behavioural psychology, neurobiology and brain chemistry. It was further found out that there is a substantial difference on how men and women manage money, spend resources and handle debt.
spend excessively to impress women. Men and Women in Debt Management Through the years, there has been a significance rise in the number of men and women who seek for financial advice. However, women remain the #1 client of financial advisors. But this doesn't imply that women have more debts than men. Rather, women have more positive outlook that debt can be
Research shows that women are more prone to
resolved and they have recognized that
impulsive buying compared to men. While 4.5%
problems on debt really exist. Men are less
of men's population claim that they have
likely to seek for financial advice mainly
difficulty in resisting sale, 23.7% of the women's
because of their ego.
population actually buy unplanned things which they don't necessarily need.
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MEN OF FAITH CONTRIBUTOR
2019
Why is this possible? Blame it on HORMONES. What Roles Do Hormones Play in Debt and Money Management The surge of testosterone hormones in the body stimulates the "winner effect" which increases their ability to take risks. While it can be beneficial at times, the "winner effect" can also drive men to produce non-feasible financial decision. With each win, the level of testosterone in a man's body tends to increase. In the long, it can impair men from making rational and effective decisions. One study concluded that testosterone hormones create quick wins for men but they are more likely to be followed by losses. On the other hand, women will tend to outperform men with their steady and slow wins. Changes in Organization Culture Through the years, there has been a significant change in the culture of many organizations in Europe. Women are now allowed to participate in decision making and of course, they are given higher positions in companies. Women are believed to be better money managers, hedge funds managers and profitable investors compared to men. Men are thought to be more optimistic than women. Their intense optimism drives them to become more aggressive in making decisions. But of course, this only applies to younger males as they experience a great surge in testosterone level regularly. Levels of testosterone in the body incur diverse effects to the decisions of women. Low level of testosterone makes women less productive while high levels result to the generation of selfish decisions.Men and Women in Making Investments Since most men are risk takers, they are more likely to invest in certain business endeavours compared to women. Most women are insecure about their knowledge in financial issues which repels them from making investments. Men and Women in Saving There have been diverse claims about the saving behaviour of women. While there are researches revealing that men are great savers while women are extravagant spenders because of their spendthrift shopping activities, some researchers claim that women are indeed better saver, spender and investor.Women are less likely to make investments but they are more inclined to engage in long term financial planning. While many women are less risky in making investments, studies show that they can be as productive and successful as men when they engage in certain endeavours. Despite the fact that most women earn less than what men earn, women tend to save more because of their huge interest to save. In the UK and Ireland, women are claimed to be better spenders and they manage to build larger savings compared to men. Want FREE PDF downloads about the spending and saving behaviour of men and women? This is a series of guides written by an expert to guide you on how to manage your spending behaviour. Click on Debt and Money Management [http://www.revenueconnections.net/] to enter the free guides section. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/7298639
Power of a Praying Man