28 March 2018

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Paddles out

A FAMILY enjoying paddle boating and kayaking off Edithvale beach last week as the sun sets was captured in action by photographer Gary Sissons.

Gig pests to face the music Neil Walker neil@baysidenews.com.au HARASSERS at live music gigs will face the music under a new program aimed at preventing sexual harassment and assault at music venues. The Chelsea Heights Hotel is one of nine venues across Victoria to sign up to a state government-backed tri-

al to stop harassment and assault at gigs. Signs and posters will be displayed at the venue from late April and staff will be trained to have a gig guide to deal with harassment of patrons. “Everyone should be able to enjoy live music without fear of sexual harassment or assault,” Local Government Minister Marlene Kairouz said. “This ground-breaking program

will enable staff and patrons to step in and better respond to sexual harassment when it happens, and to prevent it from happening in the first place.” Victoria Police, government agencies, academics and the licensed venues themselves oversaw the program’s development. The trial will run for 12 weeks and will be evaluated for further rollout

across the state. The other venues taking part in the Sexual Harassment and Assault in Licensed Live Music Venues Pilot Program are Brunswick’s Howler, Prahran’s Revolver Upstairs, Richmond’s The Corner Hotel, Melbourne’s The Toff in Town, Collingwood’s The Gasometer, Thornbury’s The Croxton Bandroom, Geelong’s The Workers Club and Ballarat’s Karova Lounge.

“We’re working with leaders in our music industry to make our creative spaces safe for all Victorians,” Creative Industries Minister Martin Foley said. “It’s everyone’s responsibility to help curb sexual harassment – staff at these venues are trained to respond quickly to these issues, so if you’re at a gig and you see something, say something.”


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Chelsea Mordialloc Mentone News 28 March 2018


NEWS DESK

Adelaide ties up in port THE Royal Australian Navy’s largest warship HMAS Adelaide arrived in Port Melbourne on Friday after steaming from a temporary berth at HMAS Cerberus in Western Port. The Sydney-based frigate is 230 metres long and can transport 100 vehicles, 18 helicopters and 1000 troops. Captain Jonathan Earley skippered the vessel in her first return to Melbourne since she was assembled at Williamstown in 2012. The visit allowed the navy to resupply the vessel and give its crew some shore leave at a time when the city was hosting the Formula One Grand Prix, AFL round one and International Flower and Garden Show. The 400-strong crew was said to have been working hard in various exercises and in need of a well-deserved break. They waved goodbye on Sunday and headed up the east coast for training exercises. Picture: Gary Sissons

Crane in sky: Building work has started on a bridge across Patterson River connecting Bonbeach and Carrum. Picture: Gary Sissons

Bridge build begins over river CONSTRUCTION work has begun on an 80-metre bridge across the Patterson River to connect Bonbeach and Carrum as part of the level crossing removals project. State Public Transport Minister Jacinta Allan visited the work site on Monday (26 March) to see construction works begin. An old pedestrian bridge will be demolished. Fishing and walking access will be available along river

paths up to the Launching Way construction site. Detours along the Nepean Highway will mean walkers and cyclists can still visit the area. “The local community advocated for the new road bridge and we’re building it. Construction has started and cars will travel on the new road bridge by the end of the year,” Carrum Labor MP Sonya Kilkenny said. “I thank people for their patience

and support while we build the new road bridge. We will continue to work closely with residents, traders and boat users to minimise disruption in the local area as much as possible.” Anti-sky rail protesters are unhappy with the prospect of any form of elevated rail along the Frankston line as part of the Level Crossing Removal Authority project to separate rail from road at level crossings.

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NEWS DESK

Chelsea • Mordialloc • Mentone

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Editor: Neil Walker 0431 932 041 Journalists: Stephen Taylor, Neil Walker 5973 6424 Photographers: Gary Sissons, Yanni Advertising Sales: Anton Hoffman 0411 119 379 Real Estate Account Manager: Jason Richardson 0421 190 318 Production and graphic design: Marcus Pettifer Group Editor: Keith Platt Publisher: Cameron McCullough REGULAR CONTRIBUTORS: Peter McCullough, Stuart McCullough, Andrew Hurst ADDRESS: Mornington Peninsula News Group PO Box 588 Hastings 3915 Email: team@baysidenews.com.au Web: baysidenews.com.au DEADLINE FOR NEXT ISSUE: 5PM ON MONDAY 2 APRIL 2018 NEXT ISSUE PUBLICATION: WEDNESDAY 4 APRIL 2018

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Flocking together: Black Swans with cygnets at Edithvale Wetlands. Picture: Gary Sissons

Say on bypass important PEOPLE can now have their say on the planned Mordialloc Bypass in the wake of the release of Environmental Effects Statement (EES) scoping on the project. The Residents Against Mordialloc Freeway (RAMF) says the community can make any environmental concerns known to the state government’s Department of Environment, Land, Water and Planning (DELWP) through the scoping process. “This is the community’s opportunity to tell VicRoads and DELWP what environmental, social, economic and cultural issues the community believes should be covered by the EES,”

RAMF president Scott Fothergill said. “During our own AGM on 6 February, VicRoads and DELWP were kind enough to attend our audience of almost 70 anxious residents, and community leaders, listing a range of environmental concerns that the EES may cover. “With a massive road running through and next to internationally protected wetlands, running next to homes and through natural habitats, we doubt apathetic assertions of mitigations will halt the incredible destruction this road will bring to the sensitive habitat in the area. The overall impact will be irreversible,

and the residents of the city will be left reeling for generations. “VicRoads are only working to steer the conversation, so it’s important to take the wheel. It’s the community members who know our local community best, and this is our chance to tell them what environmental concerns you would like to see addressed.” Public input on what the EES should consider is open until Monday 9 April. See planning.vic.gov.au/environment-assessment/projects/mordialloc-bypass or call 8392 5470 for more details.

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Renewables strife for Libs along sandbelt Neil Walker neil@baysidenews.com.au

Matthew Guy

newable sources now. A “lack of political will” rather than costs, reliability and technology was nominated as the most significant barrier to increasing renewable energy in Victoria by nearly 51 per cent of respondents. The Liberal Party did not respond to a request for comment before publication deadline. Environment Victoria is a not-for-profit advocacy group that says it is not politically aligned. The group has previously opened a pop-up “Enviro hub” in Frankston in the lead up to the state 2014 and federal 2016 elections to highlight environmental policies of political parties to voters in marginal electorates along the Frankston line.

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POLLING in the “sandbelt” seats pivotal to winning government at November’s state election reveals the Liberal Party faces a belting over its renewable energy policy. ReachTEL polling, conducted for Environment Victoria this month, found many voters disapproved of opposition leader Matthew Guy’s plan to repeal Victoria’s renewable energy target if the Coalition wins government. “Across the sandbelt, our polling confirms that voters in suburban electorates want more renewable energy and are concerned about the state’s ongoing reliance on coal,” Environment Victoria CEO Mark Wakeham said. “Over 50 per cent of voters say that Labor’s renewable energy target makes them more likely to vote Labor. “On the other hand, Matthew Guy’s promise to keep coal-burning power stations open has little public support, with less than 30 per cent of voters saying the policy makes them more likely to vote for the Coalition. The sandbelt seats are Frankston, Carrum, Mordialloc and Bentleigh. All four swung from Liberal to Labor at the 2014 state election. “Every time Matthew Guy talks down Victoria’s renewable energy sector he’s losing support in the sandbelt,” Mr Wakeham said. ReachTEL called 2939 people across the four marginal electorates on 6 March. The Labor state government has pledged to source 40 per cent of Victoria’s power from renewable sources, such as wind and solar, by 2025. About 18 per cent is provided from re-

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NEWS DESK Police patrol

With Neil Walker

Duo nabbed

Vehicles burn out

A 1995 Nissan sedan originally stolen from Dandenong Plaza on Friday 23 March was later found burnt out at about 8.30pm in a rear carpark of a factory complex at Garden Boulevard, Dingley. The vehicle was spotted in Evan Street, Parkdale before being set alight in the evening. Firefighters attended to the car blaze. Police are seeking witnesses to the arson. Witnesses are also being sought to a stolen 2002 Holden white sedan set alight at the end of Canterbury Road, Braeside at about 12.15am on Saturday 24 March. The car was stolen from Mollison Street in Dandenong North earlier on the same day.

POLICE patrolling Parkdale last Monday (19 March) arrested a duo seemingly involved in thefts from vehicles. A male, 17, and female, 23, from Mordialloc were chased by police having been seen acting suspiciously. Vehicle break-in tools and stolen property was found in their possession. The pair was charged with thefts from motor cars and drug offences. The male has been remanded in custody. The woman was bailed to appear at Moorabbin Magistrates’ Court on 27 April.

Window visitors

A woman who was awoken by “the sounds of a window being tampered with” in Sandbelt Close, Heatherton on Thursday 22 March at about 4.30am saw two men quickly walking off through a neighbouring courtyard when she went to investigate. No entry was gained. One of the men was wearing a red flannel jumper and the other a multicoloured flannelette. Police are looking for witnesses to anyone seen loitering in the area.

Bomb scare at court

A BOMB scare last Tuesday 20 March saw part of Fletcher Road near Frankston Magistrates’ Court cordoned off between about 8am and 10am. Police gave the “all clear” and reopened the road after the bomb squad was called in to investigate using a

PAGE 6

Scare then all clear: Police bomb squad quickly investigated a suspicious device outside Frankston Magistrates’ Court. Picture: Gary Sissons

robot to get close to “a suspicious device” outside the courthouse building. The suspicious device was found by a passing patrolling protective services officer (PSO). Eyewitnesses said it appeared a fuel container had been wired and taped up to look like an incendiary device in what seemed to be “a hoax”. Police have released an image, below, and CCTV footage of a man they believe can help with their enquiries. The man approached the front of the court and left an item at the front door at about 6.55am before running away. Frankston Crime Investigation Unit investigators believe a male, dressed in black clothing, standing

Chelsea Mordialloc Mentone News 28 March 2018

near the shopping centre on Fletcher Road would have seen the man they are seeking to identify as he fled and are urging him to contact Crime Stoppers.

Car gone

An early-morning dog walker returned to his Marina Road, Mentone home on Friday 23 March to find the family’s white Ford Territory missing from the driveway. A burglar gained entry to the house sometime between 5.45-6.45am and stole a wallet, phone and car keys before stealing the car. The other occupants of the house were asleep at the time.

Driver charged Detectives from the Major Collision Investigation Unit have charged a teenage girl following a fatal crash in Frankston last year. A 19-year-old Safety Beach woman was charged on Sunday 18 March with culpable driving, dangerous driving causing death, driving in a manner dangerous, careless driving, driving whilst impaired by drugs, disobeying traffic control signal and possessing a drug of dependence. The charge follows a crash at the intersection of Cranbourne Road and Moorooduc Highway on 13 July last year where a 16-year-old girl from Mount Eliza died.

Fraud uncovered

Detectives in Frankston have arrested and charged a 47-year-old Frankston woman following a series of alleged frauds involving the transfer of university tuition fees. Police investigated after reports that a number of students had large amounts of money stolen after paying an education consultancy agency to cover their university tuition fees. It is estimated that approximately $95,000 had been stolen from at least six victims since 2016. The Frankston woman has been charged with obtaining property by deception. Police say students using a third party provider should first check the company is legitimate before handing over money.

Bikies raided

STATE and federal police raided more than 40 properties including Nitro gyms in Carrum Downs, Mordialloc and Hallam on Wednesday 21 March in a money-laundering investigation involving the Comancheros outlaw motorcycle gang. Motorbikes, drugs, cash, computers and booze valued at more than $1 million were seized by police in the raid that also included a South Melbourne law firm and two accounting firms in Cranbourne and Eltham. Anyone with any information on any of the above incidents should contact Crime Stoppers on 1800 333 000 or submit a confidential crime report at crimestoppersvic.com.au online.


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New force to catch drug dealers A NEW police unit will tackle the scourge of drug dealing and trafficking across the Frankston and Mornington Peninsula region. The newly merged unit of Frankston and peninsula-based officers will be based at Mornington Police Station and will share information about dealers to crack down on drug-related crime. Detective Senior Sergeant Michael Lamb will lead the unit and has a simple message for drug traffickers. “If you’re a drug dealer rest assured we’re coming for you,” he said. Detective Lamb, also the Liberal Party preferred candidate for Frankston at November’s state election, said merging resources between Frankston and the peninsula will give police “more scope and ability to run more proactive operations”. “Drugs don’t stop at Humphries Road, dealers don’t respect area boundaries,” he said. Two detective sergeants and 12 investigators are on board to chase down drug dealers. Detective Lamb said crystal meth, also known as ice, is increasingly responsible for violent behaviour by offenders. He said he first noticed the spread of ice when he was a sergeant based at Hastings about ten years ago. “People we regularly had dealings with were not the same — they changed and started behaving violently.” Ice users can go on “four or five-day benders” and some also indulge in crime sprees in stolen cars. “We’ll have surge capacity to act quickly,” Detective Lamb said. He said ice use cuts across demographics and police have noticed some tradies using it since it initially “makes them feel great and they get lots done”. However, ice use soon takes a dark turn and people quickly become addicted amid a personality change for the worse. Police note cannabis growing in homes — vacant and otherwise — still remains on their radar.

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Highly-organised drugs operations are “funding organised crime”, Detective Lamb said, alongside “backyard operators” who believe they can produce crystal meth to sell from instructions sourced on the internet. He said police will actively oppose bail when anyone caught in the anti-drugs dragnet appears at court. Neil Walker

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NEWS DESK

Bird ‘ranching’ for parrots THE federal government is partnering with Moonlit Sanctuary, Pearcedale to build an aviary for young orangebellied parrots to survive their first winter. Research has shown that a high proportion of the endangered parrots born in the wild fail to survive their first migration across Bass Strait to Tasmania. “With only 50 adults left in the wild, and around 350 adult birds in captivity, we need to increase the breeding population – every bird matters here,” Flinders Liberal MP Greg Hunt said. “Using this technique, known as ranching, the birds will be released back into the wild population in Tasmania next summer, increasing the breeding population in 2018-19.” Environment and Energy Minister Environment and Energy Josh Frydenberg said the government had “mobilised more than $6 million for projects to support the parrot since 2014”. “This includes multi-year emergency biosecurity measures, vaccination protocols for controlling pisttacine beak and feather disease - a key threat to the birds - and supporting recovery actions guided by the Orange-bellied Parrot Strategic Action Planning Group.” For details about the orange-bellied parrot and another 19 threatened birds go to environment.gov.au/biodiversity/threatened/commissioner or call 1800 803 772.

Sam’s sons honour dad Neil Walker neil@baysidenews.com.au HONOURING a father’s memory is on the mind of the family of a former manager at Frankston’s Peninsula Aquatic Recreation Centre. Ex-PARC building and asset leader Sam Newman, a Skye father of five, passed away last April after a long and difficult fight against leukaemia. Two of his sons Deagan, 6, and Kaden, 8, joined pa Michael Tinetti at the swim and sports centre on Friday 16 March to participate in the World’s Greatest Shave to raise money for The Leukaemia Foundation. Mr Tinetti plans to take part in the charity event each year and about $3500 was raised from hair shaving efforts this year. “For myself and my grandsons to do that in Sam’s honour is very much what we want to continue to do,” he said. “Our aim now is to try to assist The Leukaemia Foundation because they have been so good to my daughter and her family.” He said the boys’ father was “a man of integrity” and more than 600 people attended his funeral last year. PARC has named a Samuel Newman award for the organisation’s employee of the year in the former manager’s honour. Mr Tinetti said people can sponsor and still contribute to The Leukaemia Foundation after this year’s World’s Greatest Shave. “People can still sponsor people even if it’s not our family,” he said. An Aquatics and Recreation Victoria

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statement in April last year said: “Sam worked his way up through the industry starting as a lifeguard and swim instructor in the early 2000s at Jubilee Park in Frankston. He held numerous positions at Frankston including duty manager and then swim school coordinator. “His affable nature and a permanent grin made him easy to love. “Everywhere Sam worked, he made many friends with his positive outlook

Bald brothers: Deagan, left, and Kaden, right, with pa Michael Tinetti raise money in the name of father Sam Newman as part of the World’s Greatest Shave. Picture: Gary Sissons

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100 YEARS AGO THIS WEEK...

Brave Frankston soldier hospitalised Compiled by Brodie Cowburn ONE day last week Mr T. Reeves, Frankston, received word from the Defence Departemunt to the effect that his son, Gunner C. Reeves, had been admitted to Sutton Veny Military Hospital, England, on 23/1/18, suffering from gastritis. We trust that Mr and Mrs Reeves will hear better news of their young soldier son, who although only a lad of seventeen, has been fighting nobly; has been badly wounded, and gone back to fight again. *** A MEETING of residents of Frankston was held at the Mechanics on Tuesday to take steps to erect a memorial at Frankston to the memory of the late Sir John Madden. It was unanimously decided that a memorial be erected at Frankston and a strong working committee was formed with power to add to their number. A committee meeting will be held at the Mechanics next Tuesday at 8 o’clock to decide what form the memorial shall take. *** THE death occurred at Frankston on Friday evening last of Mrs Cousins, wife of Mr Benjamin Cousins who for the past seven years has been employed as caretaker at Colonel Grimwade’s, “Marathon”, Mornington road. Death which was of a sudden nature, was due to a heart affection, from which the deceased lady had been suffering for some time.

The late Mrs Cousins, who was 46 years of age, was a daughter of Mr Henry Brown, of Brunswick, and for very many years had been a resident of this district. Great sympathy is felt for Mr Cousins and family in their very sad bereavement. The internment took place at the Frankston cemetery on Sunday, a large crowd following the body to its last resting place. The funeral arrangements were in the hands of Mr H. Gamble Frankston. *** UNDER the auspices of the Frankston Red Cross Society, a grand concert in aid of the repatriation fund will be given in the Mechanics’ Institute on Easter Saturday, commencing at 7 45 p.m. sharp. The programme will be given by Melbourne artists, and has been arranged by the Presbyterian Young Men’s Union. *** A BAZAAR to reduce the debt on the Hastings hall will be held on Easter Saturday and Monday, afternoon and evenings, when there will be nail driving and hat trimming competitions, hoopla, etc, and on Saturday afternoon a baby show will be held, when valuable prizes will be given. The bazaar will be officially opened by Hon. A. Downward at 8p.m. on Easter Saturday. *** A VISIT of inspection of the works in connection with the Peninsula Water Supply was made by mem-

bers of the Frankston and Hastings, Mornington, and Moorabbin Shire councils on Wednesday last. The party made the trip by motor car, and visited the source of supply, and traversed most of the pipe line. A visit to the works where the cement pipes are being made proved most interesting, and general satisfaction was expressed at the progress being made. A full report will appear next issue. *** ADVICE was received in Melbourne by cablegram from Calcutta on Wednesday that the Commonwealth Government’s agents had secured 200,000 bales of grain bags representing 60,000,000 in all. It is anticipated that these will be ample for the 1918-19 Australian harvest if the amount of tonnage available be sufficient to transport them in time. Despatch for Australia may be expected to commence in August and be continued in September and October *** LOVERS of the “light fantastic” had a most enjoyable time on Saturday evening last when a dance was held under the auspices of the Wattle Club in the Mechanics. There was a splendid attendance and the music supplied by Mr Meekin left nothing to be desired. *** THE RECONSTRUCTED MINISTRY. Patriotic citizens are agreed that

at a time of stress like the present, there should be an end of party and that a National Ministry, should hold office. Mr Hughes, Mr Cook and their colleagues made an honest attempt to establish a government fully representative of all sections in the Commonwealth. They failed, because Official Labor stood aloof. In the reconstruction of the cabinet necessitated by the resignation of Lord Forrest, by the departure of Messrs Cook and Hughes for London and, possibly, by the increasing demands made on those who have held office during the trying war years, Mr Hughes and his colleagues have been true to the National ideal. The new members of the cabinet (Messrs Greene, Poynton, Wise and Orchard) represent distinct wings of the National Party. The selection of the new Ministers is satisfactory from another standpoint. It often happens that a weak Ministry buys off a too candid critic, by offering him a portfolio when one has to be placed. Happily the Hughes government has not stooped to that. The temptation was there, for quite recently a little knot of malcontent’s threatened the Ministry. These critics should not be silenced. *** MESSRS Alex Scott o Co. will hold their usual monthly market at Tanti on Monday, April 8th, commencing at 12.30 p.m. when they will offer cattle, sheep, pigs, poultry etc. ***

THE general list of electors for the electoral division of Mornington is now printed, and may be inspected at any post office, railway station, police station and state school within the division, or at the office of the registrar at Mornington. *** SPECIAL Easter Services will be conducted at the Frankston Methodist Church on Sunday next, morning and evening, by the Rev. E. Tonkin. The musical portion will be assisted by Mr G. Ernest Tonkin, of Kyneton. There will be Communion at the conclusion of the morning service. *** THE commandant of the A.I.F. at headquarters in London has cabled to the Prime Minister, stating that confusion has been caused in connection with the mails for the Australian Imperial Force and the American Expeditionary Force owing to the use of the letters A.I.F. and A.E.F., and it has consequently been found necessary to issue instructions to all despatch officers in Australia to enclose all mail matter addressed to Australian oversea forces in army postal bags, including those bearing hospital and civilian addresses. It is now merely necessary in addressing the mail to a soldier to state the number, name, initial and permanent unit with the words “Australian Imperial Force” in full. *** From the pages of the Mornington Standard, 30 March 1918

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Chelsea Mordialloc Mentone News 28 March 2018

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PUZZLE ZONE

ACROSS 1. Male spouse 4. Allude 7. Mainly 8. Room 9. Flung 12. Improper 15. Seizing 17. Executes (law)

18. Looks longingly 21. Tires 22. Child’s toy, ... bear 23. Endless

DOWN 1. Emerging from egg 2. For, on ... of 3. Resist 4. Sunbeams 5. Had buoyancy 6. Lariat 10. Finger or toe 11. Wise saying

13. Unsuspecting 14. Blinded by light 16. Profession 18. Central idea 19. Move to & fro 20. Celebrity status

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Chelsea Mordialloc Mentone News 28 March 2018


THE MEANING OF EXISTENCE... AND OTHER SHORT STORIES

A User’s Guide to ‘The Pub Test’ By Stuart McCullough I WAS always good at exams. I would study diligently, prepare meticulously and pretty much do all I could to ensure that when the big day came I could do my very best. However, not everything in this life can be studied for and there are some tests for which you simply can’t prepare. Instead, they are trials that seemingly drop from the sky and you either pass them or you don’t. The Pub Test is one such test. Doubtless, you’ve heard of it. If you’ve never been subjected to it, there’s a very good chance you’ve administered it, even if you’ve never set foot inside a pub. It’s kind of tricky like that. Much like the Force, the Pub Test is something that resides within all of us. It’s an energy that surrounds us and not only helps distinguish between fakery and the genuine article, but can also lift a wounded X-Wing out of a Degobah swamp if needed. (Although, in those circumstances, I’d rather call the RACV.) The Pub Test is all knowing and all-powerful. It is the first and final arbiter of what is good and what is not. Other countries have a ‘reasonable person’ test. It says a lot about us that our equivalent has just ordered a bourbon and coke and a packet of salt and vinegar chips. Then again, perhaps these are the ideal circumstances under which to be reasonable. Imbued with a sense of well-being and bonhomie, it’s just the right moment to see the good in people. Or, at least, it ought to be. But timing is

Like any kind of assessment, it prompts the question – what happens next? If you pass the Pub Test, do you get a certificate? Where, exactly, within the AQF (Australian Qualifications Framework for those who don’t have Google handy) would such a qualification sit? Presumably,

everything. A Pub Test administered at six o’clock in the evening would invariably yield different results to one conducted at two in the morning. Indeed, the Pub Test at that hour would be more interested in where to get a souvlaki and taxi than a true and fair determination of anything.

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ing a honker full of something truly odious. No sir, the Sniff Test fails the Pub Test so far as I’m concerned. So where do we take the Pub Test from here? Frankly, the sky’s the limit. I can foresee a time when the Pub Test replaces all forms of scholastic measurement. Instead of NAPLAN, children would be required to sit the Pub Test instead. Imagine being assessed at eight years of age only to be informed that you had failed to pass the Pub Test. Somewhat ironically, this could quite a sobering message. But it just might be the thing to get young miscreants onto the straight and narrow. For myself, had it been possible to pull my socks up any further (I used elastic garters – they’re quite helpful), I would surely have done so. I appreciate that I’m being controversial. But I think that it’s time we turned our gaze inwards and thought a little more about how we judge things. Sometimes you need something more robust than instinct alone. Before we determine something to be unsalvageable, perhaps a measure of expertise might help the decision making process. Meanwhile, I’ve decided to do my thesis on the history of the Pub Test and how it has brought us to where we are today. I am, of course, somewhat nervous about how I’ll go. If I’m being honest, my thesis is long and not very pleasant to read. And for those reasons alone, it does not deserve to pass the Pub Test. So be it. stuart@stuartmccullough.com

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passing the Pub Test entitles you to continue your study at a higher level. I can only guess that this means being assessed at a tertiary-level drinking house such a nightclub or wine bar. That said, I don’t think I’ve ever heard a proposition being described as passing the ‘wine bar’ test. But despite the somewhat limited options for continuing study, the Pub Test is now more popular than ever. This is largely due to its incredible versatility. The Pub Test can be used to evaluate pretty much anything; from major infrastructure projects through to key moral dilemmas. Granted, the Pub Test has been under threat in recent years from a relative newcomer to the scene – social media. But while social media might be measured in trends, it’s also an environment in which people feel comfortable being the very opposite of reasonable. In fact, it’s encouraged. The more banana-squashingly bonkers you are on social media, the better. It’s for that reason that I feel that while social media may threaten the Pub Test, it will never truly replace it. Granted, there’s also the ‘Sniff’ test but, quite seriously, who wants to abandon their better judgment in favour of an olfactory-led determination of merit? Not me. There’s something quite unsavoury about the very idea of the Sniff Test. There’s the question of proximity for starters, as I think it’s the kind of adjudication that requires some fairly severe leaning in. If this violation of personal space doesn’t bother you, there’s also the fairly unpleasant prospect of catch-

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CHELSEA MORDIALLOC MENTONE NEWS

Champs Langwarrin get up over Mt Eliza PROVINCIAL

By Mr & Mrs IT Gully LANGWARRIN has been crowned Mornington Peninsula Association Provincial Champions after beating Mt Eliza. The Kangas, defending 180, had Mt Eliza reeling at 5/47 at tea on day two after 22 overs, with Lyle House and Justin Grant back in the sheds. Langwarrin skipper Travis Campbell, who’s no stranger to premierships at Edithvale, was on fire for the Kangas snaring 4/25 off 12 overs at the tea break. At the other end, arguably the best all rounder on the Peninsula, Matt Prosser was tweaking some magic of his own, bowling seven overs for a return of 1/4 at the break. Mt Eliza had teenager John Goudge playing a wonderful, patient innings while Ben Tracey was being forced to turn back the clock and play patiently. It still had some work to do. Fast forward two hours and the Mounties had lost their second grand final in as many years, bowled out for 94. Travis Campbell finished with 4/35, Matt Prosser 2/25, Adam Campell 1/11 and Jake Prosser 3/2.

Young Goudge was the final man out controversially trapped in front for 43. Earlier, on day one, Langwarrin won the toss and elected to bat first. Taylor Smith and Matt Prosser opened the innings and despite the fact they won the game off their own bat last week, could manage just a 29-run opening partnership in the big dance. Travis Campbell was out to Justin Grant for 30 before Matt Prosser was brilliantly run out by Nick Baron for 50. This left Andy Johnson and Jake Prosser to resume on Sunday with 3/116 off 63 overs. Facing the final 17 overs of their innings it was an arm wrestle. The Kangas batted at 3 ½ runs an over with Andy Johnson hitting 32 and Simon Parrot hitting 18. Mt Eliza’s Chris Mc Donough bowled 20 overs for 3/67 and skipper Justin Grant bowled 24 overs for a return of 3/43. The final Langwarrin score, given the rain softened the ground, looked defendable, they proved it was. Kangas downed: Langwarrin are Provincial champions after beating Mt Eliza in the grand final, right and below. Pictures: Andrew Hurst

It’s flag for Flinders PENINSULA

By Mr & Mrs IT Gully THERE have been many teams over the journey who have had nightmares in local cricket. Unfortunately for Main Ridge skipper Nick Jewell, that nightmare has become a habit. Looking for a change of luck, Jewell crossed to Main Ridge after losing a couple of grand finals at Sorrento. Despite the unquestionable talent the bad luck continued to follow him. Jewell’s Main Ridge finished day one after 57.3 overs on 8/74. Shaun Foster top scored with 36 (Foster’s old team Carrum was defending 7/200 against Dromana who were 3/57 at tea on day 2). Nick Jewell was the second highest

run scorer on 12. With 23.3 overs still to bat on day two, Main Ridge could add just two more runs to its total, bowled out for 76. Matty Burns was superb once again with the ball, snaring 4/34 off 19 overs, while Dwayne Field snared 3/15 and Max Royal helped himself to 3/10. At tea on day two, Flinders was in a commanding position at 2/69. We didn’t have to wait for much longer for both captains to agree to pull up stumps after Flinders passed the total, 3 wickets down and with Tommy Clements in total control. Finders winning the flag was their first since 2011-12 and will be their first time in Provincial since the mid1980s..

Day three on cards after rain halts grand final play DISTRICT

By Mr & Mrs IT Gully TORRENTIAL rain may not have affected first XI matches in all other divisional grand finals, but all roads will lead to Skye this Saturday afternoon when Baden Powell and Heatherhill finish their grand final battle. The run-ups were unplayable and despite best efforts to at least start the match, both captains agreed to start the grand final fresh on Sunday. At tea on the second day (Sunday) Baden Powell who won the toss and elected to bat, were 2/68 with Rhys Elmi ticking the scoreboard over nicely.

Baden Powell legend John Harrison made the call that 170, given the ground conditions, would be a very good score to defend. At that point, Baden Powell was on track. One thing Harrison may have forgotten at that stage was that Heatherhill boasted the in-form player of the competition, Steven O’Donnell. At the time of going to press Baden Powell with 10 overs remaining was 6/175.

Match still on: Baden Powell and Heatherhill will face each other again for a third day of play to decide the District championship. Picture: Andrew Hurst Chelsea Mordialloc Mentone News 28 March 2018

PAGE 13


CHELSEA MORDIALLOC MENTONE NEWS scoreboard

Lions wield the willow SUB-DISTRICT

By Mr & Mrs IT Gully TEN overs could mean the difference between a win and a loss, even in local cricket. At stumps on day one of the sub-district grand final between Dromana and Carrum, Dromana was in total command with the score at 5/140 after pushing through 70 overs on the rain-affected first day. For the Lions, several players got starts with the bat, but none of them pushed on to make a significant dent on the scoreboard. The bonus for the Lions was that they

resumed day two with Jake D’Atri and Dylan Stead not out on 36 and 13 respectively. From the outset of day two the Lions had intent and as such blasted 60 runs in the final 10 overs to put them in a commanding position in the grand final. Stead was especially damaging before the Lions finished at 7/200 off their 80 overs. At tea on day two, Dromana had lost three quick wickets before steadying to be 3/57, Jedd Savage and Jack Fowler unbeaten at the crease. At the time of going to press Dromana was 9/131 with Jack Fowler back in the sheds, out for 69.

Batting on: The District grand final between Baden Powell and Heatherhill is still to be decided after a rain delay. Picture: Andrew Hurst

Frankston Pines, Somerville lead the way SOCCER

By Craig MacKenzie FRANKSTON Pines and Somerville Eagles were the only local teams to start the 2018 State League season on a winning note. Pines head coach Paul Williams gave starts to Mitch Landers, Naseer Mohammed, Aaryn Rix and CJ Hodgson and used their pace and ability to transition quickly to hurt home team Heatherton United on Saturday eventually running out a 2-0 winner in their State 2 SouthEast contest. Heatherton was caught on the break half a dozen times with former Pines’ keeper Alfonso Cardinale making a fine save to deny Landers from converting Pines’ best first-half chance. It took a low strike from Rix in the 57th minute to break the deadlock but Heatherton looked set to equalise 10 minutes later when young Pines keeper Jarrod Nardino gave the ball away and brought down Heatherton striker Ali Senad inside the area. But the youngster held his nerve and saved the resultant penalty attempt and it was game over in the 85th minute after Cardinale brought down Landers and the referee pointed to the spot. Hodgson converted to secure the points for Pines. Somerville Eagles beat Casey Panthers 4-3 away from home in Saturday’s opener to the State 5 South season. Two clinical finishes from Louis Griffiths, a fierce strike by Sam Beadle from just outside the area and a stunning free-kick by Matthew Curd secured all three points for the visitors. “Casey Panthers pushed us all the way and despite finishing with two centre-forwards playing in the defensive line and having Hayden Taylor sent off, we hung on to get a massive result,” said Somerville player-coach David Greening. “We were without nine of our senior squad for various reasons so I was hugely proud of the lads that played today with a couple of them having to play out of position.” Two second-half penalty saves by Robbie Acs couldn’t stop Langwarrin losing 2-0 to Moreland City in their NPL2 clash at Lawton Park on Saturday. The first of three Moreland penalties was successfully converted by Jesse Makarounas in the 15th minute after a poorly timed lunge by Luke Burgess had felled Moreland striker Lisandro Paz inside the area. Andy McIntyre’s sliding goal-line clearance in the 28th minute stopped

PAGE 14

Speed kills: Naseer Mohammad has added pace to Frankston Pines’ strike force. Picture: John Punshon

Moreland going further ahead. The best chance of the half fell to Langwarrin striker John Kuol in the 38th minute when he broke clear into a one-on-one only to be denied by the foot of advancing Moreland keeper Liam McDowell. In the 60th minute Christopher Cristaldo got clear on the right of the Langy area but shot straight at Acs and a soaring header from Kuol following a Paul Speed corner in the 70th minute thumped against the crossbar and was cleared. But Langy failed to clear from a corner in the 81st minute and Paz volleyed home from close range to complete the scoreline. Langy striker Liam Baxter received a second caution in the 91st minute and was sent off. Mornington’s bid for another State 1 South-East title started poorly when it went down 1-0 to Manningham United Blues at Dallas Brooks

Chelsea Mordialloc Mentone News 28 March 2018

Park on Saturday. A straight red for veteran Mornington striker Wayne Gordon in the 18th minute had the home side facing an uphill battle. The decisive moment in this contest came in the 23rd minute when a cross from the left came off the shoulder of James Newman as he attempted a header and beat Mornington keeper Liam Little. The 10 men pressed for an equaliser in the second half but Sammy Orritt’s volley from the left of the area sailed over. Mornington came closest to scoring when a superb Curtis Hutson cross in the 77th minute from the left picked out big Max Etheridge whose goal-bound touch was instinctively tipped onto the bar by Manningham keeper Stefan Taleski before being scrambled clear for a corner. Peninsula Strikers went down 3-1 away to Brandon Park in their re-

arranged State 2 South-East fixture on Saturday. Maxim Avram (2) and Sam Nikolovski scored for Brandon Park with Ryan Wilson scoring for Strikers. State 3 South-East promotion candidates Monbulk Rangers and Skye United clashed at Monbulk Recreation Reserve on Friday night with the home team winning 2-1. Scores were level at the break but five minutes into the second half Monbulk captain Geordie Scott broke into a one-on-one and put the hosts ahead. Skye began to panic for the remainder of the half as chances went begging and a clinical finish from Arash Sadeghi in the 75th minute gave Monbulk a two-goal buffer. Skye’s Mitch Blake pulled one back five minutes from time to ensure a tense finish but despite Skye’s pressure, it couldn’t grab the equaliser. Teenage midfielder Jack Gallagher signed with Skye last week and scored in the reserves before coming off the bench in the second half to replace Chris Driver. A pre-game injury to Mark O’Connor had sidelined the Irish midfielder whose place in the starting line-up was taken by Driver. Two other Skye midfielders are injured. Cameron Leopold had to come off against Monbulk with a broken toe while youngster Jordan Redburn was unavailable as he battles to overcome a hip injury. Defender Johnny Andrinopoulos remains sidelined by an Achilles strain. Off the field, Skye fared far better last week when local state government MP Sonya Kilkenny announced a $945,000 upgrade to the clubrooms at Skye Recreation Reserve. Seaford United looks set for another testing season after being thumped 6-0 by Brighton in their State 3 South-East contest at North Seaford Reserve on Saturday. Dylan Waugh had flirted with joining Strikers during the pre-season but returned to the fold and rejoined Seaford last week but was unable to have an impact in what was a dismal opening-round display by Paulo Pinheiro’s men. Three goals in six minutes allowed Brighton the luxury of a 3-0 halftime lead and effectively ended the contest. Jared Ekkel had spent the opening half-hour strolling about in midfield and distributing the ball at his leisure and in the 34th minute his first strike was parried by young Seaford keeper Austin Kearney who was helpless to

stop Ekkel’s close-range follow-up attempt. Two minutes later Michael Knott turned Daniel Mota inside out then struck a low shot past the diving Kearney to make it 2-0. As if to rub salt into Seaford’s wounds the move down Brighton’s right in the 40th minute was clearly offside but play continued and a low cross to the far post set up Nick Bale for a tap-in. Bale repeated the dose from close range in the 53rd minute to make it 4-0 then a simple inter-passing move involving Louis Hughes, Bale and David Nicholas ended with Nicholas in a one-on-one with Kearney and making no mistake from 10 metres for number five. Ekkel’s low shot from just outside the area in the 72nd minute made it 6-0 and a combination of inept finishing and a couple of good reflex saves from Kearney saved Seaford from an absolute shellacking. “I think it’s going to be a long, hard season,” said a Seaford insider at the final whistle and no-one disagreed. Baxter’s State 4 South campaign got off to a disastrous start with a 7-2 home loss to Monash Uni on Saturday. The mood at Baxter was upbeat leading into the clash after young gun Travis Ernsdoerfer returned last week from an NPL2 foray with Langy’s under-20s. But by half-time Monash led 3-1 and went on to record a resounding victory. Izaak Barr and Dan Disseldorp scored for Baxter. Southern United welcomed back Elisabeth Robers last week but lost Sunday’s NPLW clash with Box Hill United 10-1 at Monterey Reserve with Casey Aarons scoring for Southern. The under-12s won 2-0 with goals from Jasmine Smith and Stella Rogers; the under-14s won 9-0 with goals from Rhys McKenna (3), Candy Kilderry (3), Alex Jones, Danica Vukcevic and Alessandra Davis; the under-16s drew 2-2 with goals from Lily Aitken and Monique Lapenta while goals from Mackenzie Hicks and Jess Beddows couldn’t stop the under-19s from going down 4-2 in a much-improved performance. There are no State League or NPLW games over the Easter weekend but Langwarrin, Mornington and Strikers are in action in the fourth round of the FFA Cup. SATURDAY, 3pm: Langwarrin v North Geelong (Lawton Park), Mornington v Peninsula Strikers (Dallas Brooks Park).16s 11.40am, U19s 1.15pm).


Chelsea Mordialloc Mentone News 28 March 2018

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