> Simon Bloom, Family Office Consultant:
The Other Side of the Coin
T
he children of self-made millionaires have much to live up to. Finding their own path to fulfilment means second generation individuals must navigate parental expectations and face the dangers of self-doubt. But achieving selfworth is possible and need not be fraught with intergenerational conflict. The season finale of Sky Atlantic series Billions offered a profound insight into the complexities of familial relationships amongst the super-rich. For those unfamiliar with the series, it focuses on the combative relationship between fictitious hedge fund billionaire Bobby ‘Axe’ Axelrod and US Attorney General Chuck Rhoades. Both characters are exemplary in their respective fields but – driven by an overwhelming urge to be the best and to triumph over their adversary – are flawed and often lapse into illegal and immoral behaviour. Billions treats its audience to a glimpse of the trappings of a lavish lifestyle but also reveals the myriad challenges ultra-wealth brings. In particular, we see the intricacies of Chuck’s relationship with his father, self-made millionaire Charles Rhoades Sr. Charles Sr exhibits the classic characteristics associated with a generation-one individual. He is driven, successful, and often myopic in his approach to life. He lives vicariously through Chuck, imposing his own unfulfilled dreams of becoming governor on his son. Charles believes that every effort he makes, every calculated strategy – notably to bring down Chuck’s nemesis Axe – is entirely in his son’s interest. Yet seen through the eyes of Chuck, this father-son relationship is anything but symbiotic. Chuck feels manipulated by his father; that his own interests, goals, and lifestyle choices are dismissed. Chuck is an archetypal generation-two individual. He desperately wants to please his father, yet wants to meet his own ambitions in life as well, and while the two share a common goal of achieving the role of governor for Chuck, the ways in which they want to get there are at odds. Ultimately, these differences cause what is essentially, a loving relationship to break down as the two fail to understand the other’s desires, perceptions, and experiences. Finally, after one run in too many, Charles Sr disowns his son. The brutality with which Charles terminates the relationship is shocking and is made all 162
"For many generation-one individuals their genetic makeup, psychological, and neurological development make it incredibly difficult to empathise with their children or accept a differing view point." the worse for the fact that father and son could have established a meaningful and sustainable relationship. A lack of communication, mutual understanding and respect led to the irretrievable differences. Unfortunately, this is all too common in wealthy families. THE CHALLENGE Moving to a non-Hollywood example, the Jones family – an illustrative but fictitious family of established manufacturers and owners of Widgets Ltd in the UK for 35 years – found itself facing similar familial discord. Mother Rosie, aged 72, has been running the company since her husband and father of her three children died twenty years ago. Her eldest son James, 39 and heir apparent to the business, is keen to take over the reins and relieve his mother of her day-to-day responsibilities. James has built up a long history of relevant experience. He obtained a finishing school degree and went on to complete his MBA before working at McKinsey for the next decade. He then came to work for Widgets Ltd, starting in junior management before working his way up to director level. James’ younger sister also works for the business as a marketing associate, whilst his younger artist brother is based in Paris and has no direct connection to the family firm. James’s frustration lies in his mother’s reluctance to relinquish control of the business. The problem is exacerbated by James’ father’s dying wish that the business grow into an international enterprise. Rosie, however, is keen to play it safe, keep the business contained, and limit investments and expansion. CFI.co | Capital Finance International
James fears he may not be given access to the business until he is well into his fifties by which point the opportunity to expand the enterprise will have been lost taking with it his relationship with his mother. At the same time as disregarding James’s expansion plans, Rosie repeatedly reiterates how her efforts are all for her children and is equally frustrated that her son fails to appreciate her point of view. Rosie feels she is responsible for the extremely comfortable lifestyle that her children have enjoyed, yet James feels this material attention is of little value while his mother fails to recognise his skills, talents, and ambition. For many generation-one individuals their genetic makeup, psychological, and neurological development make it incredibly difficult to empathise with their children or accept a differing view point. It is often said that having great success often feeds our narcissistic sense of self. This is by no means always the case, but for Rosie – and our fictitious example of Charles Rhoades senior – a sense of self-righteousness prohibits them from seeing their children’s side. Meanwhile generation-two are either so overwhelmed by their parents’ success that they acquiesce and capitulate to generation-one’s dominance and fail to make themselves heard. At the other end of spectrum, generation-two is so frustrated by their parents’ dogmatism that they rebel and abandon the family business completely. This creates a challenging environment in which James needs a cadre of skills that he does not really possess. INTEGRAL CONSULTING James must be flexible, but in a skilful way. He will need to accept that his mother will unlikely relax her position. Instead, he needs to validate Rosie’s positive input by praising his mother for the work she has done in creating a stable and secure environment. After all, it is thanks to her that he has fulfilling employment and lifelong opportunities in the successful family business. James must make clear how much he appreciates his mother and reinforce her sense of self-worth and achievement. Only then is Rosie more likely to hear James’ side. It is at this point that James can put forward his plans for the business, but this must be done in such a way as to not threaten Rosie’s need for stability as she approaches retirement. James could suggest taking a portion of the non-core