Dear Reader:
Welcome to the very first issue of Living in Layers. This moment has been a long time coming. The Living in Layers brand this zine, the podcast, the entire vision has lived inside me for years as a dream, quietly waiting for its time. I spent so long searching for myself, second guessing my worth, and sleeping on my own magic. But this? This feels right. This ignites a spark in me I feared was lost. Living in Layers is more than a reflection of my multiracial identity.
It's a celebration of every piece of me mother, creator, lover, fighter, healer, wild soul. It's a living, breathing collage of expression and truth. Every word, every page, every episode is a thread in the tapestry of who I am and who I'm becoming. Thank you for being here at the beginning. I'm committed to showing up, sharing my story, and holding space for anyone who finds healing, joy, or simply a piece of themselves in these layers. Peace, love, and happiness,
Youreditor, Tri
BECOMING THE BUTTERFLY: A REFLECTION ON MULTIRACIAL IDENTITY
By: Katrina Perez
Ithinkaboutbiracialandmultiracialidentityallthetimehowitscaressociety,howitpushes backonculturalnorms,howit’susedasaweapontodividetheprivilegedandtheoppressed It’s shapedmymentalhealth,myrelationships,andthewayImovethroughtheworld.It’sgivenme bothprivilegeandoppression.It’scomplexinallofitsbeauty.
Beingmultiracialislikecarryingmultiplesoulsinonebodyeachoneknowing,eachonefeeling, eachonebearingtheweightofhistory’straumasandtriumphs Itisduality Itismultiplicity Itis navigatingtheworldwithfullawareness,evenwhentheworldpretendsnottoseeyouclearly. Ispeakoutaboutinequitiesinsideandoutsideofclassroomsnotonlybecauseofwhathistory hastaughtme,butbecauseI’veseenitfirsthand I’velivedintwoworlds Iknowexactlywhat thatis Iknowhowtheworldperceivespeoplelikemeambiguous,confused,otherandyethow oftenittriestoremainblindtoourrealities.
Often,Isitalone.It’seasierthatway.It’slessconfusingwhenIdon’thavetohearhowmuchI "don’tfitin"fromeverysideofthecoin ButIdon’tsharethistoseekpity Iknowtheprivilegemy skingrantsme,andIknowwhatitdeniesme
Thisdualityshowsupinmymotherhoodtoo.Havingchildrenwithawhitemanmeans navigatinghowtheirfairerskinisperceived howthey’reoftenassumedtobelongtosomeone else Iseehowothermomstreatmeinwhitespaces IseehowmychildrenareviewedinBlack spaces Ifeelallofit Everyday
ButIamcomingtotermswithitall.
Iambecomingthebutterfly.Awomancloakedinmulticoloredwings.Bold.Visible.Free. Iamnolongerhiding
3
I’ve lived so many lives
All filled with madness, Sex, Drugs, Abuse.
I’ve lived so many lives
All filled with happiness, Fun, Excitement, Adventure
I’ve lived so many lives
All filled with grief, Depression, Lost days, Lack of sleep
I’ve lived so many lives
All filled with Great friends, Love, Heartbreak, Growth
I’ve lived so many lives.
But this life
This one my spirit has been reincarnated into Is filled with Healing, Change, Accomplishments, Smiles
This life is filled with hope
A L O N E
I can feel myself slipping away.
Some days are worse than others. Some days are better than others.
But I can feel myself slipping away.
All the courage, All the fear, All the love, All the doubt
Are turning into numbness.
I am disappearing. All of me is disappearing.
It’s lonely.
The slip away is lonely.
No one knows that I am coming to an end.
My outsides don’t match my insides.
I hide my numbness behind fake smiles, Forced laughs,
And an overachieving energy.
I don’t want to fake it anymore.
I just want to disappear.
I just want peace.
I can feel myself slipping away.
THELAYERS
Your Self-Care Starter Pack
This page is your soft landing a mini roadmap to reconnect with yourself Dive into a curated playlist to soothe your spirit, explore a mental health resource that gets you, take in a motivational word from someone who’s walked through fire, and don’t forget to press play on the Living in Layers podcast. Healing starts here. ��
“We need culturally informed healing. Mental health care isn’t onesize-fits-all and we deserve spaces that see us ”
Recommendations: Change INC.
“Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.”
Audre
Lorde, Black feminist writer and warrior poet