CBY Fall 2013 Bulletin by Congregation B'nai Yisrael of Armonk

2 Banksville Road â&#x20AC;˘ Box 7 â&#x20AC;˘ Armonk, NY 10504 â&#x20AC;˘ Quarterly Bulletin â&#x20AC;˘ Fall 2013

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Building on our Cornerstones

Lisa Broomer, President

I would like to introduce myself as the new President of our congregation and Board of Trustees, and tell you a little bit about the important changes that have been happening at CBY. I have been a member of CBY since 1996. My service to our CBY community has included time on the Board from 2004 to 2009, as Treasurer from 2004 to 2006 and on various committees such as Budget and Finance, Synagogue 2K and Long Term Financial Planning. One of my favorite points of service was developing the Sunday morning pancake breakfast program, which has been a catalyst for future service for many of our families. Check the CBY website (cbyarmonk.org) to learn more about all of the congregants currently serving as members of our Board. Over the past two years, a group of committed members has worked on articulating the Cornerstones of who we are as Congregation Bâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;nai Yisrael. Our Cornerstones will guide our choices during this important time of transition, and our new quarterly Bulletin is divided into sections based on these seven Cornerstones: Tradition, Community, Learning, Commitment to Others, Investment, Leadership, and Relevance (read the description of each cornerstone in Rabbi Limmerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s new blog: rabbilimmer.cbyarmonk.org). Your family will be receiving a Bulletin in the Fall, Winter, Spring and Summer. Between each Bulletin, you can stay up-to-date through our website, weekly Shabbat Shalom email, Rabbi Limmer's blog, or Facebook (facebook.com/cbyarmonk). Here is an update on a number of important topics. continues on page 2 (

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3 Leadership Honors and Acknowledgements Meet Our Board of Trustees Online Community Early Shabbat Services 4 Community CBY Cultural Connections High Holy Days Schedule 5 Community Our CBY Community

6 Learning Commitment to Learning Religious School Schedule

9 Tradition An Apology

7 Learning For Our Young Families Post B'nai Mitzvah Program Adult Education

10 Investment High Holy Day Campaign

8 Commitment to Others Giving Back Upcoming Programs

Backpage Relevance

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cbyarmonk.org • temple@cbyarmonk.org facebook.com/cbyarmonk • @cbyarmonk

Rabbi Seth M. Limmer rabbilimmer@cbyarmonk.org Cantor Hayley Kobilinsky cantorkobilinsky@cbyarmonk.org Rabbi Douglas E. Krantz Founding Rabbi, Retired Ava Saperstein Administrator ava@cbyarmonk.org David Pribish Bookkeeper david@cbyarmonk.org Alicia Allison Communications Director alicia@cbyarmonk.org Dara Feuerstein B’nai Mitzvah Coordinator dara@cbyarmonk.org Rabbi Joan Farber Interim Director of Education rabbifarber@cbyarmonk.org Joanna Nevins Religious School Assistant joanna@cbyarmonk.org

BOARD OF TRUSTEES Executive Committee Lisa Broomer President Ross Honig Vice President, F nance Lisa Mazure Vice President, Programs; Caring/Social Action Co-chair Debra Ezratty Treasurer Bonni Stanley Secretary Ivy Levien Member-At-Large

Neil Katz Kara Klein Aaron Kwittken Samantha Schwam Paul Skurman Brian Socolow Rich Waksman

CBY Cultural Connections Caring and Social Action Co-chair Fund Raising Jewish Identity Development Chair Fund Raising Chair House and Grounds Chair Communications Co-chair Security Chair Communications Co-chair High Holy Day Honors Chair Budget and Finance Chair

PAST PRESIDENTS Lewis Schaffer John Stern Michael J. Gross ‫ז״ל‬ Mike Jacobs Lyle Halperin ‫ז״ל‬ Ann Leber Ellen Bernstein Charles Shapiro

Robert Regal Marilyn Heimerdinger Shelly Jacob David Brody Barby K. Siegel Joel Dworetzky Frederic J. Siegel Larry C. Fox

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(914) 273-2220 • fax (914) 273-2285

Members of the Board Susan Bloom Felicia Buebel Sari Deutsch Michelle Eickelbeck Diane Freedman Sheldon Ganis Brian Kaminer

continues from cover Jewish Identity Development Director We were all saddened when Liz Marlowe, our Jewish Identity Development (JID) Director, informed us that she was not going to return this fall. But I am happy to report that we have a unique opportunity to have Rabbi Joan Farber serve as our Interim JID Director. While Joan practiced as a rabbi early in her career, she then became a leader in the area of Jewish education. She served as Director of Education at Greenwich Reform Synagogue and joined the URJ where she was involved in developing, implementing and maintaining a series of impactful adult educational programs. During this time, Joan remained connected to child development at Eisner and Crane Lake Camps. Having taken some training available for interim rabbis, Joan is well positioned to help us maintain our JID program this year and assist in finding a permanent director. Sale of Parsonage The sale referenced to in the special vote by the membership at the Annual Meeting fell through earlier in the summer. Based on the inspection related to that sale, we identified some improvements to the parsonage that would make it significantly more marketable. Specifically, we removed the buried oil tank and installed one in the basement, eliminating any environmental concerns a prospective buyer might have. Finances We ended the 2012/13 fiscal year with a slight surplus, based on the fund raising related to Douglas' retirement gala. The Executive Committee and Board of Trustees continue to work hard to improve our financial condition. Expenses have been cut significantly over the past few years and are in line with congregations of similar size in similar areas. These congregations derive a significantly higher percentage of their revenue from fund raising than we do at CBY. In an effort to address this, we have increased the focus on recognition as part of our fund raising strategy, to respectfully acknowledge those families which can make significant contributions. However, we will continue to recognize ALL financial contributions, understanding that the smallest donation may represent a significant statement of support for the congregation when received from a family of limited financial means. Recognition We are also re-doubling our efforts to recognize those congregants who make generous donations of their time and energy. It is these congregants who participate in and manage the activities that ensure that our sacred community continues to thrive and grow. Some of this recognition will take place at the High Holy Day services, and our efforts to recognize these congregants will continue throughout the year. I hope that all of our families had an opportunity to rest and rejuvenate this summer. As a congregation, we will quickly turn our thoughts to the spiritual renewal we experience worshipping together for the High Holy Days in September.

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Honors and Acknowledgements

Paul Skurman, Honors & Acknowledgements Committee Chair

This year we are starting a new tradition at our High Holy Day services. For the first time in the history of our congregation, members will be called up to the bimah during the morning Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur services to read a portion of the service. This honor will be given to selected members of the congregation – those who are “leaders,” “do-ers,” “givers,” “elders” and “learners.”

The members of the committee are Joanne Peyser, Karen Sherman, Stuart Kovensky, and Marcia Goldstein. With input from the Board, Rabbi Limmer and Cantor Kobilinsky, our committee will select this year’s honorees. This will be a difficult task because not everyone who is deserving of an honor can be selected this year. However, our plan is to recognize others who should be honored in the years to come.

At a congregation like ours, where there are so many members who are deserving of this special honor, we are limited by the number of reader parts—there are fewer than 30.

It is with great enthusiasm that we embark upon a new tradition that affords us the opportunity to celebrate the richness of our temple family. We look forward to seeing you during the holidays.

I am Chairing the Honors and Acknowledgements Committee which has been formed at the direction of the Board of Trustees.

Meet Our Board of Trustees Online Seven new members were elected to our Board of Trustees by the congregation at our Annual Meeting in June. We welcome to our Executive Committee Lisa Broomer (President) and Bonni Stanley (Secretary), and to our Board of Trustees Susan Bloom, Michelle Eickelbeck, Diane Freedman, Samantha Schwam, and Paul Skurman. Learn more about our newest members and all of the other congregants currently serving on our Board online at cbyarmonk.org/our-community/board-of-trustees.html

Early Shabbat Services This year our Early Shabbat Service will be twice a month, on the 1st and 3rd Friday of the month at 6:30 p.m. To check Shabbat service times each week, you can visit our website at cbyarmonk.org or check our weekly Shabbat Shalom email. Early Services will be on September 6, September 20, September 27 (special early service for Simchat Torah), October 4, 18, November 1, 15, December 6, 20, January 3, 17, February 7, 21, March 7, 21, April 4, 18, May 2, 16, and June 6, 20.

CBY Cultural Connections Now in its second year, CBY Cultural Connections is planning a wide variety of programs, including an author series, cooking classes, art and film programs, a Progressive Dinner, Boutique Luncheon, and Mah Jongg Luncheon. Save the date for the following events, and keep an eye out for more dates in our weekly Shabbat Shalom email, on our website: cbyarmonk.org, and in our next Bulletin in the winter. NICOLE DWECK | Thursday, December 5, 10:00 a.m. Author of The Debt of Tamar

PROGRESSIVE DINNER Saturday, October 26

LESLIE KIMMELMAN | Sunday, March 23, 11:00 a.m. Author of children's books, including Hanukkah Lights, Hanukkah Nights.

BOUTIQUE LUNCHEON Thursday, May 1

YAEL KOHEN | Tuesday, April 8, 7:00 p.m. Reporter and editor based in New York City and author of We Killed: The Rise of Women in American Comedy

High Holy Days Schedule 5774 ROSH HASHANAH

YOM KIPPUR

Erev Rosh Hashanah Service Wednesday, September 4, 8:00 p.m.

Kol Nidre Service Friday, September 13, 8:00 p.m.

Rosh Hashanah Morning Service Thursday, September 5, 10:00 a.m.

Yom Kippur Morning Service Saturday, September 14, 10:00 a.m.

Family Service, up to age 10 Thursday, September 5, 2:30 p.m.

Interfaith Dialogue Saturday, September 14, 12:30 p.m.

Tashlich at Wampus Pond Thursday, September 5, 3:30 p.m.

Family Service, up to age 10 Saturday, September 14, 2:30 p.m. Afternoon Service Saturday, September 14, 3:30 p.m. Memorial and Closing Services Saturday, September 14, 4:30 p.m.

Our Congregation Welcomes

Congratulations

Harold and Rosemarie Schulman, and their daughter, Gina

David and Linda Greenberg, on the engagement of their daugher, Samantha, to Shai

Michael and Elissa Goldenberg, and their children, Emma and Ava David Hymen and Lauren Gochman Sharwin and Lynn Kersh, and their children, Ilana and Adin Michael and Laura Strober, and their children, Max, Jed, and Ella Jeffrey and Samantha Lowe, and their children, Elijah and Madelyn Jeffrey and Liat Kimmel, and their children, Ethan and Sophia

In Memoriam Bella Nicholas, grandmother of Amy Yallof Harold Tobias, father of Ron Tobias Sybil Wild, wife of Harold Wild Stanley Stadlen, father of Susan Mack

Our CBY Community

Rabbi Seth M. Limmer

I think it must have been awful to live on the Ark. Granted, it was better than the alternative. But I know that even after a week's vacation with my extended family—whom I love dearly—I am thrilled to return home to my own space, our own routine. 40 days and 40 nights in cramped quarters is no one's idea of the perfect family vacation. Add to that the routine cleaning, feeding and maintenance of every species of animal, and those fabled forty on the Ark must have been arduous.

The ship sailing on the seas is a powerful metaphor for community. And not only because it reminds us of the potential damage one person can do to an entire group of associates. If we think more broadly—and more positively—the cruise ship symbolizes something highly important about the communities that define us: like passengers about to sail, we buy our tickets because we want to go to a destination; we choose a cruise line because of their standards, their reputation, their services, and the kinds of people we are likely to meet on board. Our expectation—and our hope—is that from the moment we climb on board we will find new friends, engage in meaningful activities, discover new experiences, create meaningful memories and find and feel refreshment.

Very few of us would aspire to spend such a season sailing on the sea with a limited group of people. While our dearest relations define us—we speak of our family circle, or our circle of friends—we do not want to feel either limited or hemmed in by our nearest and dearest. We tend to prize our individuality and our individualism even in the arena of family. I know I talk about what I want to do, or what my "Limmer four" will be doing, even though I am one voice (and often a minority one) in my own household, and that we are but four Limmers in a virtual sea of family that suffuses the New York area. And that's not even bringing in the Morse, Jones or Morgovsky families...

“The ship sailing on the seas is a powerful

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metaphor for community.

Each of us is an individual who lives in relationship with family, friends, and community. We chose to live in our corner of Northern Westchester because of the community; once here, we freely made our own friends. While you can't really choose your family, the lucky amongst us love them anyway. Often we engage in meaningful ways with all these aspects of our lives; sometimes, we separate ourselves. For a day, for a vacation, for some time to think. We are closely connected to our communities in intricate fashion: they define us, we surround ourselves by them, and sometimes we separate ourselves for our own needs. We stand within and simultaneously apart from all the groups that make us who we are. Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai captured this communal connection in a metaphor from our midrashic tradition. [If you want to look up the original, it can be found in midrash Leviticus Rabbah 4:6.] He described the scene of sailing on the sea. A few days into the journey, one person among the passengers removed from his bags a small hand-held drill. To the others' amazement, he began drilling a small hole in the bottom of the boat. The other travelers screamed out, "What are you doing?" To which the man replied, "It's no worry to you... I'm only drilling under my own seat." I guess rabbis have long known to open a teaching with a joke. The obvious humor of this passage is captured in the passengers' reply to this hole-maker: "The hole you drill under your own seat will flood and sink the boat with all our seats!" Their retort opens the door for Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai to teach an important lesson about what it means to share with others: when one person destroys communal property, everyone in that community suffers the consequences. This was no small matter in the Rabbi's time: Roman persecution of Jews was rampant, and the negative behavior of a few Jewish citizens of Rome could be devastating to the lives and even existence of the entire Jewish community. We know from history that when Rabbi Akiba revolted against Rome, the Empire evicted our people from Jerusalem, and banished them to the Galilee in the North. It would be nearly two thousand years until we returned....

Hopefully, being a part of synagogue community also provides all those experiences. Here at Congregation B'nai Yisrael, we seek to be that center of Jewish life in Armonk (and beyond), a neighborhood place that helps form bonds among our member families. At our best, which we strive to be, we are a spiritual and social center where we very individual human beings find religious meaning and fulfillment among community. As such a spiritual center for individuated-butconnected people, we have a lot to learn from Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai. First, we learn that every person matters: if the man with the drill could sink the whole boat, we should learn that every person also has the ability to bring unique gifts to the journey. Second, we are reminded that the trip for which each of us has signed up with CBY is not only a personal one: there are fellow travelers, with shared interests and values, who can enrich the time we choose to share. Just as few of us would take a Carribean cruise and sit in our staterooms all day, so too do we lose something when we treat our synagogue experience as entirely personal and apart from others. And while we don't do the bunny-hop through our sanctuary or put our a midnight buffet, we have plenty of social opportunities to share (and even a Midnight Run to go and help feed others.) The season before the High Holy Days is a time for each of us to think back on our individual accomplishments, shortcomings, and aspirations. Hopefully as we approach this meaningful season, we do so with eyes open to the possibilities we will have in the next year to become more of the individuals we want to be through this wonderful synagogue community we all chose to join. May 5774 be a year in which we all bring our own gifts to this journey we share, and one in which we learn to appreciate the gifts, minds, hearts and experiences of our fellow travelers.

Fam il y Tr i p to I sr a el Take a memorable trip with Rabbi Limmer and our CBY family to Israel from December 19-30 2013 with Eilat & Petra Extension December 30- January 2 . This is a wonderful opportunity for your family to be in touch with our Jewish Heritage, our Jewish History, and our Jewish Home. To sign up, contact Rabbi Limmer at (914) 273-2220 or rabbilmmer@cbyarmonk.org.

Commitment to Learning

Rabbi Seth M. Limmer

Why is learning so important to Jews? How did it happen that our greatest symbol became a book, the sacred scroll of our Torah? Over two thousand years ago, our sage Rabbi Chananya ben Teradion taught that when two sit and study Torah together, Divinity dwells upon them. Today we might say that opening ourselves up to the depths of our tradition puts us in touch with something different, meaningful and powerful. When we feel touched by a teaching from our Torah, we might even call that moment holy.

Developing a healthy sense of self is essential for our teenagers. That is why our leadership spent a lot of time this past year focused on how we could connect to more of our teens in meaningful ways, especially during these often turbulent years where having a center like CBY could be so grounding and constructive. It was out of those discussions that we developed an entirely new program for our students after they have become b’nai mitzvah. We are shifting to an elective style system and are allowing our teens to choose those courses that they personally will find fulfilling. These courses meet for a short series of weeks and take place on different nights of the week (and sometimes even weekends). We have so many different types of opportunities for our sudents to explore, as you can tell from some of our course titles: Jews & Cinema, Packing for College, Jews in the Kitchen, Got to Get Back to the Garden, and so much more. Hopefully the coming year will be one where all our teenagers will find the opportunity to spend time studying their Jewish selves with their CBY community.

A lovely little book entitled Jews and Words, co-written by Israeli novelist Amos Oz and his historian daughter Fania Oz-Salzberger, explains that the two most important places where we pass on our love for learning are around our family tables and at our synagogue. For many of us, family and synagogue are intermingled: we joined a temple to help build our children’s Jewish identities. Indeed, learning the lessons of our Jewish heritage is a primary focus at Congregation B’nai Yisrael. Here we discover the building blocks of Jewish life, expand our sense of self in a Jewish context, and apply Jewish wisdom to every stage of our journey.

“...the two most important places where we pass on our love for learning are around our family table and at our synagogue.

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These cornerstones of our commitment to learning are the theme of our upcoming year as well. One of the biggest challenges in life is finding time—making time—in our busy lives. As much as we hope to apply the wisdom of our Jewish tradition to our adult journeys (and our difficulties, obstacles, opportunities and celebrations), we don’t always find success. In this coming year, we have so many opportunities for us as adults to find nourishment, excitement, challenge and comfort in shared study. “Adult Education” is hardly a snazzy title: but through our Text in the City, Study in the Suburbs, Torah Study, Author Series and other programs, there are so many opportunities to come for one meaningful experience, or to create your own calendar for putting the potential for personal growth as part of this year’s to-do list.

Lastly, our hallways are filled every day of the week with young people and teachers discovering together the building blocks of Jewish identity. Over the past three years that I was fortunate enough to immerse myself in our religious school, I was constantly amazed at both the excited enjoyment of our children and the depths of their learning. I remain reassured at how wonderfully our teachers have put our revised curriculum into practice, and am encouraged to see how our young people retain what they have studied. That is why, as I anticipate mentoring and supervising our new Principal, I am convinced that our programs of developing Jewish Identity will be stronger than ever in the coming year. Study is the hallmark of our Jewish tradition. This coming year will be a wonderful opportunity for our entire congregation—adults, children and teens—to come together to Congregation B’nai Yisrael for shared experiences that will be different, meaningful, and powerful. And, hopefully, holy.

Religious School Schedule 2013-2014

3rd grade

Family Reorientation Program, Wednesday, September 18, 6:30-8:00 p.m. Wednesdays, 3:30-5:30 p.m., after school session begins September 25

4th grade

Family Reorientation Program, Thursday, September 19, 6:00-8:00 p.m. Thursdays, 3:30-5:30 p.m., after school session begins September 26

5th grade

Family Reorientation Program, Tuesday, September 17, 6:00-8:00 p.m. Tuesdays, 3:30-5:30 p.m., after school session begins September 24

6th grade

Family Reorientation Program, Monday, September 16, 6:00-8:00 p.m. Mondays, 3:15-5:30 p.m., after school session begins September 23

7th grade

Family Reorientation Program, Wednesday, October 2, 6:00-8:00 p.m. Wednesdays, 6:00-7:30 p.m., after school session begins October 9

For Our Young Families TOT SHABBAT | Fridays, 5:30-6:15 p.m. October 11, November 8, December 13, January 10, February 7, March 14, April 4, May 9 Tot Shabbat is a time for our children to experience Shabbat through storytelling and music with their parents. Our program is shared with our clergy and features the music, fun and excitement of Kenny Green. KINDERGARTEN | Sundays, 9:30-11:00 a.m. September 22, October 20, November 17, December 8, January 12, February 9, March 9, April 6, May 4 Our Kindergarten program is an experience for the whole family to learn about the Jewish holidays, Jewish food, and Jewish living. 1st AND 2nd GRADE PROGRAM | Sundays, 9:30-10:15 a.m. (weekly), following our pancake breakfast at 9:00 a.m. for the whole family. Family Days: September 22, October 20, November 17, December 8, January 12, February 9, March 9, April 6, May 4

Post B'nai Mitzvah Program: 8th-12th Grade The goal for our teens who have become b’nai mitzvah is that they develop the Jewish identity they have built here at CBY by exploring how to apply Judaism to their lives and world. Our leadership spent a lot of time this past year focused on how we could connect to more of our teens in meaningful ways. It is out of those those discussions that we developed an entirely new post b'nai mitzvah program. We are shifting to an elective style system and are allowing our teens to choose those courses that they personally will find fulfilling. Program choices now include: ▶ Taking individual courses based upon interest ▶ Being at CBY every Tuesday evening as a regular experience ▶ Confirmation (requires at least 9 courses during grades 8-10) To sign up or if you have questions, contact Rabbi Limmer or Cantor Kobilinsky at (914) 273-2220.

Adult Education TEXT IN THE CITY | Wednesdays at noon, October 2, November 6, December 4, January 8, February 5, March 5, April 9, May 7 at Pryor Cashman LLP, Times Square, NYC STUDY IN THE SUBURBS | Wednesdays at noon, October 9, November 13, December 11, January 15, February 12, March 12, April 23, May 14 at Congregation B'nai Yisrael Join Rabbi Limmer for a monthly lunchtime opportunity to connect with CBY, our Jewish tradition and the side of your brain not occupied with your mobile device. This year we will be exploring the Book of Deuteronomy, which marks the first major religious reform in the life of our Jewish people. We will discover how our ancestors’ changing world altered their understanding of their spiritual and communal life, and come to know deeply the fifth and final book of the Torah. Our subjects will include: The Book, The Scroll, The Reform, Moses & Monotheism, The Temple, Judges & Justice, Laws of Warfare, Friends & Family, Covenant, Curse & Choice and The Death of Moses TORAH STUDY | Saturdays, 9:00- 9:45 a.m. • Resumes September 21 A weekly opportunity every Shabbat morning in our library to discuss the week’s Torah portion with our clergy. Come every week or once in a while; all you need to bring is an open mind. ROSH CHODESH LUNCHEON & STUDY GROUP | Fridays at noon once a month, dates TBD Rosh Chodesh is a special holiday where we find peace, enrichment, and sisterhood. At CBY we are a grassroots gathering of women who meet each Hebrew month to celebrate the new moon. We serve lunch and share in informal programs focusing on Jewish and/or women’s issues.

Giving Back

Lisa Mazure & Felicia Buebel, Caring & Social Action Committee Co-chairs

Our Caring and Social Action Committee serves two roles at CBY. We care for our congregants in time of need and we provide opportunities for congregants of all ages to have a hands-on experience giving back to the community at large. We are blessed to be part of such a wonderful organization. The members of CBY give willingly of their time and energy. We have a devoted group of over 30 volunteers who consistently cook meals for the elderly and drive them to doctor appointments and the senior center. When a congregant is sick or in need CBY families step up to the plate to help out. We also provide on-going support to the wider community through our annual High Holy Day Food Drive and other programs for the Community Center of Northern Westchester. Our Midnight Run and Emergency Shelter Partnership are great ways for the whole family to get involved in feeding and caring for the homeless in a meaningful way. It is always rewarding to see our CBY community come together and roll up their sleeves to make lunches, cook meals and sort clothes. Look for us at the High Holy Days and find out how your family can become involved.

Upco m in g Pro gram s SHOPPING FOR THE HUNGRY Ongoing We collect food weekly to donate to the Community Center of Northern Westchester. Food donations can be dropped off at the temple at any time. The most needed items are: Canned fruit & vegetables, Tuna & canned meat, Cans of soup, beef stew & chili, Pasta, rice and spaghetti sauce, Peanut butter and jelly, Dried & canned beans, Fruit juice, Hot & cold cereal, Baby food & diapers HIGH HOLY DAY FOOD DRIVE September We encourage everyone to donate food by handing out bags on Rosh Hashanah with a list of needed items from our local food bank. Bags full of food donations are then returned on Yom Kippur and delivered to the Community Center of Northern Westchester. CHANUKAH GIFT DRIVE December 1 Our first Chanukah Gift Drive in December 2011 exceeded our expectations. Over 75 congregants of all ages spent a fun morning wrapping 300 holiday gifts for residents of the Pleasantville Cottage School, a residential treatment center for emotionally troubled young people. The gifts and wrapping paper were all donated by our families. Since then, it has become a yearly program that brings families together to help make the holidays happier for the young people living at the Cottage School. COAT DRIVE November through January Each year we help our neighbors stay warm in the winter by collecting gently used, clean coats, mittens, sweaters, and scarves. Our congregants have an opportunity to not only donate items, but to hand them out to people in need during the Midnight Run. 8

PAJAMA DRIVE November through January To help our youngest neighbors in need stay warm in the winter we collect sleepwear, robes, socks and slippers for children, ages infant through 18 years. The Pajama Drive is also sponsored by the Community Center of Northern Westchester. MIDNIGHT RUN Winter, Date TBD During the winter months our congregation participates in the Midnight Run, providing a meal, clothing and toiletries for New York City's homeless. Our families help by donating essential items and food, preparing meals and packing up clothing/ blankets, and driving to NYC to deliver the donations to the homeless. While we are helping the homeless, we break through the barriers of prejudice and fear that separate us from â&#x20AC;&#x153;the homeless" and learn to see them as real people. EMERGENCY SHELTER PARTNERSHIP March 10-16 For several years CBY has joined with the Emergency Shelter Partnership and has been one of several religious organizations to help house the local homeless of Northern Westchester. For a week we provide cook hot meals and stay over night with our neighbors in need. KLEZMER CONCERT Spring, Date TBD Every year we host a Klezmer Concert for the Havorah Program of Westchester Jewish Community Services. The concert is a unique opportunity for people with developmental disabilities to experience Jewish life. Our families greet our guests and serve snacks, offering us an opportunity to interact and share a special evening with the disabled community in Westchester.

An Apology Back in the day, I would beg my father to make a stop on his commute home from New York City at Joseph Patelson’s Music House, around the corner from Carnegie Hall, to find needed music scores and sheet music. Occasionally, a stop at the Lincoln Center Tower Records would suffice. Today both are, regrettably, closed. Most anything one wants or needs can be obtained with a click of the computer mouse. In some ways, the experience denies us certain opportunities; I miss out on browsing and discovering hidden treasures I might never have known existed. In other ways, it’s efficient, cheaper, and more convenient. Technology hasn’t spared musicians, nor has it neglected Jews. We can watch services streamed online, study Torah and Talmud on a multitude of different websites, and read news of Jewish current events from across the globe with a minimum of effort. It is therefore no surprise that certain Jewish traditions have transformed online as well. There are websites where one can write notes to be printed in Israel, folded into kvitlach (Yiddish: little papers on which prayers and requests are written), and tucked between the stones of the Kotel (Western Wall). One can “light” Shabbat candles on one’s smartphone using an app. One can even do “teshuvah” (repentance for one’s sins) on Facebook. (Teshuvah comes from the Hebrew root meaning “to turn back/to return.”) Yes, it always amazes me to see relatives, friends and colleagues post blanket apologies on Facebook before Yom Kippur. The posts usually read something like this: “If there is anything I may have done to hurt you in the past year, I apologize and ask for forgiveness.” The tradition behind the action of asking forgiveness specifically in the weeks leading up to Yom Kippur dates from as far back as the 4th century, became more wellknown in the era of the Geonim (7th-11th centuries), and was wellestablished by the era of the Rishonim (11th-15th centuries). (The Talmud makes a case for teshuvah having been established before the creation of the world, but that is a topic for another article.) Of course, there are two very separate types of teshuvah: repentance between a person and God, and a very different type of repentance: between a person and ANOTHER person. We can say all sorts of prayers and apologies to God in our thoughts, in writing, and in our actions, but an infinite amount of that type of teshuvah doesn’t have the same effect as apologizing face to face with a person whom you have wronged. It is much easier to repent to God, isn’t it? When we face another human being and we know we must apologize, we put ourselves in an unprotected, powerless state of humility. And yet all we can do, our sole control of the outcome, is to try to repair the harm. When the damage is permanent, one is solely dependent upon a person’s ability to forgive. We place ourselves at that person’s mercy, though we may not even feel completely contrite; perhaps we feel our actions were justified, or are eager to defend ourselves with extenuating circumstances. Regardless, when we are aware (or even clueless) of having done wrong, we are instructed to take the steps of teshuvah regularly. Maimonides, in his tractate on laws of repentance, quoting from the book of Isaiah, taught that teshuvah is especially important as we move towards the judgment day of Yom Kippur.

Cantor Hayley Kobilinsky I don’t particularly like the Facebook “blanket method” of posting a general apology, though I suppose it’s better than nothing. There is something too simple about saying a general “I’m sorry” for something which one MAY have done. If the general apology comes after an exhaustive attempt to track down those whom we know we have wronged in order to apologize, then fine. It might be more genuine to precede the blanket apology by requesting to know, from the same general audience, if one has forgotten, inadvertently or unknowingly done something to hurt another, or asking if one feels owed an apology; that way we can better remember and repent.

“...there are two very separate types of teshuvah: repentance between a person and God, and... between a person and ANOTHER person.

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I have great respect for those who don’t just talk the talk, but walk the walk. And so, I will be following my own advice this year as far as not merely posting a blanket apology on Facebook, but rather first asking my friends, family and acquaintances to contact me off-line to help me be aware of any misdoings so that I might try to right the wrong. I also believe that it’s never too late for these things. I remember to this day something hurtful I said to a classmate in 6th grade. I was immediately embarrassed, but didn’t apologize at the time, and I subsequently lost my chance when the boy’s family moved away that summer. It has been over two decades and I still feel the embarrassment I felt that day, as well as a sense of grief: if I remember and am pained by the words I used, so might he. I have been trying to locate this person for years. Perhaps this is the year I can try to wipe that slate clean. I often write at this time of year about turning over a new leaf, beginning from scratch, rebirth, and the cycle of our Jewish life. In our school days, this is most apparent thanks to the academic system and calendar, which has a start date and end date. In our adult days, however, we must work a bit harder to find these opportunities. It is one of my summer “projects” to right some wrongs of the past year, as well as those which might date a bit farther back. I know I have fallen short. I owe phone calls, emails, thank-you notes, and visits. I have meant to make donations to charities which have fallen on the back burner. I know I haven’t purchased enough food for the collection box at the temple. I haven’t spent enough time with those about whom I care. There is much to do, and not enough time, as is always the case. One step at a time, however, I will be doing teshuvah. Maimonides taught that teshuvah is always timely. And so, I apologize, for all of the above, and I’m sure for even more. Furthermore, if I have wronged you, either willfully or inadvertently, you will probably be hearing from me. My prayer is that it will never be too late. If you don’t hear from me, but you think you should, please let me know. As we greet each other on the High Holy Days, pray together, and begin our new year together, I hope we may do so with open hearts. Ken yehi ratzon. May it be God’s will. I wish you and your families a Shanah Tovah. 9

High Holy Day Campaign

Sheldon Ganis, Board of Trustees

This is an exciting time of transition and change at Congregation B’nai Yisrael of Armonk. During the past few years, our Board of Trustees has worked hard to develop community-minded initiatives and innovations that would enrich our CBY experience: a wider variety of programs that actively engage members of all ages; a Memorial Wall and Tree of Life that help us collectively commemorate the meaningful people and events in our lives; and more open and frequent dialogues with our congregants.

Beginning this fall, the new experience of being a strong Congregation B’nai Yisrael supporter will entail a series of events and gestures of the congregation's appreciation. We will begin by recognizing members who support our High Holy Day campaign with a donation of $720 or above with a formal tribute. Every contribution to our High Holy Day campaign will be appreciated and acknowledged in our winter Bulletin. This winter we will hold a special event (with no solicitations) to celebrate those who have happily provided us with such needed support. In the spring we will set aside a designated Shabbat to thank and honor all of those who have given so generously their time, energy, and resources to our CBY community.

As we have begun to implement these programs and lay the cultural foundation for the new era of Congregation B’nai Yisrael, we are working to establish a financial system that better reflects the familial spirit at the heart of our synagogue. What we hope to commence is a new season of fiscal support in which contributions above and beyond annual dues are not only voluntary, but also recognized and celebrated.

For more information about our formal tribute for our High Holy Day campaign, contact the temple office.

Donations

Tree of Life s

General Fund John and Marilyn Heimerdinger, in appreciation of Debra Ezratty's hard work for Rabbi Krantz's Gala Lane Family, in memory of Burt I. and Shirley Sherman Stuart and Elyse Fraser, in appreciation Rabbi Limmer's Discretionary Fund Noah and Deborah Katz, in honor of their daughter Rebecca's first birthday Bruce and Susan Pollack, in memory of Joan Gerard Cantor Kobilinsky's Discretionary Fund Ina and Stanley Lane, in honor of the Cantor's Concert Bruce and Susan Pollack, in memory of Joan Gerard Rabbi Krantz's Discretionary Fund Bruce and Susan Pollack, in memory of Joan Gerard Matthew and Rebecca LePage, in honor of the naming of Sam and Max Arlene and Mark Comora, in memory of Florence Holtzman Norman and Ilana Adler, in honor of Rabbi Krantz's retirement Randy and Fran Deutsch, in honor of Phillip and Catrina's Wedding

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Mackenzie Reese Gold Birth April 22, 2013 Russell Simon Meltzer Birth February 4, 2013 Pearl and Mark Vogel 50th Wedding Anniversary September 1, 2013

Memorial Wall and Garden Our Memorial Wall and Garden allows our community to memorialize our loved ones and to place a stone by their names at times of remembrance. For more information, please contact the temple office at (914) 273-2220, temple@cbyarmonk.org.

King David Memorial Chapel, Inc Generations of lasting service to the Jewish Community Family Owned and Operated • Handicapped Accessibility Graveside Services • Monuments • Preneed and Prepaid Planning Fully Accommodating Facilities

288 East Main Street • Mount Kisco, NY 10549 914-241-7100 • www.kingdavidmemorials.com

Selling a Car, Truck or 4x4? Help CBY by donating a vehicle you no longer need. Donating your vehicle is safe, fast, and tax deductible. Some restrictions apply. This service is provided free to the temple. For more information, please call Auto-Line Enterprises at (914) 681-1757

Your local Ophthalmology group Bruce Gordon, M.D. Allen Greenbaum, M.D. Seth Potash, M.D. Neil Katz, M.D. James Gordon, M.D. Edmund Farris, M.D. AnnMary Abadir, O.D.

170 Maple Avenue White Plains, NY 10601 (914) 949-9200 984 North Broadway Yonkers, NY 10701 (914) 476-0650

General Ophthalmology, Pediatric Ophthalmology, LASIK, Glaucoma & Cataract Consultations, Contact lens exams, Cosmetic Eyelid Surgery, Botox

To advertise in our quarterly Bulletin, contact Alicia in the temple office at (914) 273-2220, alicia@cbyarmonk.org

Save the Date Family Sukkah Decorating & Dinner | Wednesday, September 18 • 5:30 p.m. Simchat Torah & Consecration Service | Friday, September 27 • 6:30 p.m. Text in the City | Wednesdays, October 2, November 6, December 4, 12:00 p.m. in NYC Study in the Suburbs | Wednesdays, October 9, November 13, December 11, 12:00 p.m. at CBY Progressive Dinner | Saturday, October 26 Ecumenical Thanksgiving Service | Tuesday, November 19 • 8:00 p.m. Chanukah Gift Giving Party | Sunday, December 1 • 11:00 a.m. Author Coffee and Conversation: Nicole Dweck | Thursday, December 5, 10:00 a.m. Visit our website at cbyarmonk.org for a full calendar of programs and events. 11

NON-PROFIT ORG. U.S. POSTAGE PAID WHITE PLAINS, NY PERMIT NO. 4438

rel•e•vance

noun \'re-l -v n(t)s\ close connection to the matter at hand; practical and especially social applicability: my Judaism has relevance to my modern life. ·

Our upcoming fall season is filled with not only Holy Days, but also opportunities to deepen our days with greater significance, to build stronger connections to friends and family, and to discover new ways to make our Jewish tradition a part of our lives. Here’s one suggestion—for each of our four upcoming sacred occasions—as to how we can make these holidays more meaningful to our lives:

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Rosh HaShanah: Tashlich is the traditional ceremony where Jews cast breadcrumbs into water as symbol of letting go of former misdeeds. There are powerful moments—surrounded by the beauty of nature—when we have the opportunity to reflect on the people we have been and the people we want to become. As we throw our bread/regrets into Wampus Pond (which is where our congregational family observes tashlich), we have the opportunity to prepare ourselves for the work of t’shuvah, of turning ourselves into the people we want to be in the coming year.

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Yom Kippur: Oddly enough, a ritual marked by fasting is usually framed by two very large meals. Our pre-Yom Kippur dinner can be in keeping with the solemnity of the sacred day if we take the time at the family table to focus on meaning. In our sanctuary, we will apologize for myriad misdoings; it is powerful, in the moments leading up to Kol Nidre to create the space for every family member to apologize to the others for some area, in the past year, where they fell short of their own (or others) expectations.

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Sukkot: Our harvest festival is traditionally marked by time outside (usually in our Sukkah) and periods of reflection over life’s metaphorical harvest. During the seven days of Sukkot, why not take a hike? We live in an area surrounded by such natural splendor. This festival provides the perfect chance for us to spend time with others, actively reflect on all that for which we are grateful, all the while appreciate the beauty of the Creation through which we walk.

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Simchat Torah: in Jewish tradition, the greatest gift one could give (or receive) is a book. Torah literally means, “learning” or “instruction”. So, after (or even instead of) joining us in the sanctuary to dance with our Torah Scrolls, why not spend time revisiting an old, favorite book? Or take the opportunity of Simchat Torah to make a gift of a favorite book (and a postreading conversation) to one you love? The most adventurous amongst us might even use the occasion to join us on Saturday mornings for an adult conversation about the Torah itself!