Catholic Community of Bartlesville Newsletter — May 2023

community of St. John & St. James

MEET PARISHIONERS

Carroll and Gwen Kirwin

Using Time and Talents to Serve for the Glory of God

Carroll and Gwen Kirwin have found that, in retirement, they have more time on their hands. So, they’ve decided to use that time to serve St. James Parish.

“There are things that need to get done, and we have the time to do them,” Carroll says.

Although they both serve in many capacities, they each have their favorites. Gwen loves cooking and baking, so making food for funeral luncheons is a perfect fit. She and Carroll also help set up for the meals.

“It’s really rewarding to help with funeral meals,” Gwen says. “Most of the time, they aren’t expecting it. When they come into the Fellowship Hall to a delicious, well-organized meal, they are very pleased and blessed.”

Carroll loves taking the time to care for the outdoor spaces at St. James. He cuts the bushes around the church building and rectory and pulls weeds in the flower gardens. He also plants flowers, cleans up leaves, and shovels the sidewalks along with others. One of his favorite jobs, which he finds most important, is walking the

Carroll and Gwen Kirwin

The True Meaning of the Word “Stewardship”

There is a stigma attached to the word “stewardship” in some Catholic parishes, likely because many pastors and parish leaders mistakenly equate stewardship to money. But a true steward knows that couldn’t be further from the truth.

Stewardship is a biblical principle that has nothing to do with money. Nineteen of the main parables of Christ relate directly to stewardship. And, in those parables when Christ speaks of stewardship, He never mentions raising money. Surprised?

Stewardship simply means being grateful for all of God’s blessings. Everything we have — each breath we take on earth, the tremendous talents we possess, and our ability to earn income to sustain ourselves — all stem from God. We come into the world with nothing and we leave with nothing.

Recognizing this and being grateful for our bountiful blessings is the first step of stewardship. Once these realizations fall into place, we are then eager to find a way to respond to God’s generosity and embark upon a stewardship way of life.

And stewardship is just that, a way of life. It is not like a TV show to which you can tune in whenever the mood strikes and shut off when you are no longer interested. It is truly a way of living.

Yet, the mere word “stewardship” has gotten a bad rap over the years — and not just by us laypeople.

According to the late stewardship pioneer Msgr. Thomas McGread, when a pastor speaks about money during his homily, 75 percent of the congregation immediately stops listening. However, did you know that tithing is mentioned in the Old Testament 39 times, and in the New Testament

11 times? Tithing is biblically based, and it simply means to give a portion of our gifts back to God.

In 1992, when the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops were forming the Pastoral Letter on Stewardship, they originally didn’t want to title it Stewardship: A Disciple’s Response .

“Instead, they wanted to just call it A Disciple’s Response , with the reason being that they felt ‘stewardship’ meant money,” said Msgr. McGread before his passing in April 2013. “I convinced them at the time that ‘stewardship’ is a biblical term and it is our job to explain what a steward is. Before the Pastoral Letter, most of us didn’t understand the spiritual dimension of stewardship.”

So, how do we go about sharing the spiritual dimensions of stewardship with fellow parishioners and lay leaders?

First of all, Msgr. McGread cited the importance of being hospitable and discovering the needs of parishioners. He felt that when parishioners were welcomed and their needs were met, they were fulfilled and felt a sense of belonging to their parish family. This, in turn, creates ownership. Once parishioners felt like they were part of the parish, they wanted to respond by sharing their time, talent, and treasure to help make it the best Catholic Community possible.

And, as parishioners support their parish with all of their resources out of gratitude, the entire Catholic Community blossoms. Prayers increase, ministries grow, and yes, the offertory increases. These blessings are natural outcomes of living a stewardship way of life and they are why we must always remember the true meaning of the word “stewardship.”

Honoring Our Lady in May

Dear Parishioners,

May is Mary’s month. For centuries, Catholics throughout the world have included special devotions to the Blessed Mother in their activities during May. Best known, I’m sure, is the widespread and ever-popular practice of crowning an image of Our Lady with flowers during the month.

May is a beautiful month, full of renewal and hope. The March winds and the April showers have done their work, and the spring flowers are in bloom. Even though the earliest signs of spring have passed, May doesn’t quite have the look or feel of summer. It is spring at its finest! And it’s not only the flowers or trees that show new life in May. For many students, May is the month to prepare for graduations, and these students will soon move on to new phases in their lives. We also commemorate St. John’s Feast Day — May 6 — with a special celebration, this year on Friday, May 5.

And of course, May is a month of joy for all of us who claim the Church as our spiritual home. We spend the whole month this year in the Easter season, which closes with Pentecost on May 28. The joy of the Resurrection, the glory of the Ascension, and the descent of the Holy Spirit are the themes that fill our Christian calendar.

But as we rejoice with Mary at her Son’s triumph over sin, Satan, and death, we remember her faithfulness to God’s will throughout her life. Indeed, she can be viewed as the model Christian steward. The United States Conference of Catholic Bishops pointed to her in its pastoral letter on stewardship: “After Jesus, it is the Blessed Virgin Mary who by her example most perfectly teaches the meaning of discipleship and stewardship in their fullest sense” (Stewardship: A Disciple’s Response, 41).

Let us follow her example of total dedication to God as we rejoice in the blessings He gives us this month!

Sincerely yours in Christ,

Fr. John O’Neill Pastor

LANDSCAPING MINISTRY Keeps Parish Grounds

Our St. John Landscaping Ministry put down its roots about 25 years ago. From its two founding members — Grace McWilliams and Nancy Dykstra — it has blossomed into a dedicated group that works to keep the plantings around our church and school tidy and attractive.

The ministry began when Grace’s and Nancy’s children were in school. The women found themselves helping around the school, and it was then they noticed that the garden plots around the school needed attention.

“We started spending time working the flower gardens, and from there the group grew,” Grace says. “Sometimes we’d take the kids with us as we worked, planting flowers, trimming bushes and trees.”

The ministry now has eight members, including Grace and Nancy.

“We send out a text when there’s good weather and whoever can show up, does,” Grace says.

Spring and fall days call for cleanup in the garden areas. Seasonal flowers are planted to supplement the established, colorful bushes and trees. The ministry does not mow the lawns, but if there is a task that might be too big for the ministry members to handle, there is help.

“We have a couple guys who help, and the Knights of Columbus help out as well,” Grace says.

Unfortunately, the dry weather over the last few years, coupled with a non-working sprinkler system, meant the group wasn’t able to do much seasonal planting. The heat also ruined a number of the bushes that the ministry will replace.

The ministry offers members the opportunity to share their talents with the parish as they work diligently to make the church property inviting to all.

“It’s also a good time to pray when I’m working,” Grace says. “It’s a good time to catch up with my Rosary. It’s not adoration, but I’m not too far from the sacraments. It works

One of the garden areas cared for by the Landscaping Ministry shows the attention to make the area an attractive space at the church.

“I’m not a teacher, so this is something I can do — digging in the dirt! I’m a task person, so working in that works for me. And this is another place for prayer.

You’re outside of God’s church and being alone is important.”

— GRACE MCWILLIAMS

well for me to do my praying while I’m in the garden.”

Like the Kirwin’s and the lawn mowing teams at St. James, taking part in the ministry enables all the members to practice stewardship in a unique way.

“Definitely, yes, for me,” Grace says. “I’m not a teacher, so this is something I can do — digging in the dirt! I’m a task person, so this works for me. And this is another place for prayer. You’re outside of God’s church and being alone is important.”

With our church’s downtown location, the ministry members often interact with passersby, be they folks

walking to work, parents coming to the school, older persons out for a stroll, or sometimes, homeless persons.

“Sometimes people come up to us and they need help, money, or they want to talk,” Grace says. “It’s kind of a place to share and communicate with people.”

The ministry members offer a greeting, a friendly “look in the eye” and engaged conversation.

“More and more will stop and chat, and introduce themselves,” Grace says. “It’s kind of nice. I like it. To have someone smile and say ‘hello’ can change your attitude.”

New members are always welcome to join the ministry.

Meet Parishioners Carroll and Gwen Kirwin continued from front cover

property to clean up trash and other items.

“I want God’s place to look good and clean,” he says.

Gwen doesn’t help outside as often, but when she does, she enjoys it.

“When I dig in the dirt, it feels good” she says. “It’s nice to be able to help wherever we can.”

There are several ministries in which the couple is involved together — one being cleaning the vessels used for Mass. This is an important job that they do each week. They also periodically help with setting up senior luncheons at St. James.

“When we are washing vessels, we can look through the church and see if anything needs to be done,” Gwen says. “Being in the church together when no one is there, it’s a wonderful feeling.”

Carroll also enjoys writing and helped compose the 50year history of St. James. Along with Bob Zoeller, Carroll co-wrote the 100-year history of St. John’s as well. He has

also written four historical novels. The couple also helps with the collection when needed.

“We don’t do as much as so many others,” Gwen says. “We appreciate all that people do. We don’t do it for man’s glory. We do it for God’s glory.”

Gwen was raised in the Quaker faith tradition. Carroll’s strong faith is what drew Gwen to the Catholic faith.

“Carroll is so dedicated,” she says. “Whatever he does, he does thanking God for everything he has. He is such a spiritual man. I’m so blessed.”

Carroll and Gwen feel blessed with their two daughters, four grandchildren, and two great-grandchildren. In their free time, they enjoy exercising and socializing with neighbors. Gwen also loves to read. They feel very blessed by the strong community they have found at St. James.

“We are all intertwined,” Gwen says. “We love each other and help each other.”

Anyone with questions or wanting to join may contact Grace McWilliams at 918-214-7215.

“We don’t do as much as so many others. We appreciate all that people do. We don’t do it for man’s glory. We do it for God’s glory.”

— GWEN KIRWIN

Leisure Club:

A Wonderful Place for Community, Food and Fun

Parish communities celebrate some of the most important days of the year together. Christmas and Easter highlight the liturgical year, while weddings, Baptisms, and funerals are natural parts of our lives. However, the value of a simple meal together can’t be underestimated. The Leisure Club at St. John is a great example of building community in the simple and ordinary things of life.

The Leisure Club meets on the first Tuesday of each month for lunch in Conference Room 2. Parishioners from both St. John and St. James gather between 11:30 a.m. and noon for a potluck meal. After lunch, all are invited to stay for Bingo and to socialize. Renae Elmenhorst began coordinating the Leisure Club meetings in September and enjoys having a regular time to get together with fellow parishioners.

“It feels like a family reunion,” Renae says. “It’s a wonderful and relaxing time. We’ve never run out of food and

Christian women are the best cooks.”

Leisure Club meetings are casual, filled with good food and conversations, as well as Bingo games that cost a nickel per card. Sometimes the priests and deacons stop by for a bite to eat.

“When someone calls and wants to come, we tell them they don’t even need to bring food their first time,” Renae says. “We don’t come to make money — we come because it’s fun to get together.”

While Bingo is a hit, some parishioners prefer to chat over a cup of coffee. These lunches are open to all parishioners of any age. Some parishioners even stop in on their lunch break for a meal and a friendly conversation.

“I really look forward to it,” Renae says. “It’s a time for community and bonding and it connects us all no matter what our age.”

St. James also hosts a potluck lunch with a guest speaker each month and many parishioners from both parishes frequent both events, strengthening the ties between the parishes. Some

people even come from Dewey for the community and camaraderie.

The Leisure Club did stop meeting temporarily during the COVID-19 pandemic, but meetings have been back in full swing for almost two years now. Renae hopes to see all those who use to frequent the potluck return. Historically, the Leisure Club takes a break for the summer months, but if enough members are interested, they’ll keep meeting through the summer. Parishioners can RSVP to Renae but are also welcome to come unannounced if the opportunity arises.

“Just show up and bring a dish,” Renae says. “We can always make more coffee.”

Renae Elmenhorst

“It feels like a family reunion. It’s a wonderful and relaxing time. We’ve never run out of food and Christian women are the best cooks.”

— RENAE ELMENHORST

For any questions about the Leisure Club, contact Renae Elmenhorst at 918-331-9090 (home) or 918-440-9740 (cell).

The Patron Saint of Impossible Causes: St. Rita

Feast Day, May 22

and forgiving, even as she endured physical and emotional abuse from her husband.

Eventually, her husband was killed in a feud between rival families, and St. Rita was left a widow with two young sons. She faced many trials during her widowhood, especially when her late husband’s brother continued the feud and hoped to convince Rita’s sons to seek revenge. As her sons grew, they wished to avenge their father’s murder. Fearing her sons would lose their souls, she tried to dissuade them from retaliating to no avail. She asked God to remove her sons from the cycle of vendettas and prevent mortal sin and murder. Her sons died of dysentery a year later, which pious Catholics believe was God’s answer to her prayer, taking them by natural death rather than risk them committing a mortal sin punishable by Hell.

St. Rita of Cascia is an important saint in the Catholic Church, revered for her steadfast faith, exemplary life of stewardship and discipleship, and her miraculous intercession.

Born Margherita Lotti in 1381 in Roccaporena, Italy, St. Rita lived during a time of great turmoil, marked by conflicts between rival Italian city-states and the Papal States, as well as widespread poverty, disease, and lawlessness.

Despite these challenges, St. Rita was raised in a devout Catholic family, and from an early age, she exhibited a deep love for God and a desire to serve Him. As a young girl, Rita desired to become a nun. However, her parents arranged for her to marry a man named Paolo Mancini. Paolo was known for his violent temper and abusive behavior towards Rita. Despite this, Rita remained patient

After the death of her sons, St. Rita was free to pursue her lifelong dream of becoming a nun. However, the convent she wished to join had a strict rule that only women who had never been married could enter. St. Rita prayed for three days, asking for a sign from God, and on the third day, a miracle occurred. She heard a knock on the door, and when she opened it, she found herself surrounded by a group of nuns who took her into the convent without question.

St. Rita lived the rest of her life as a nun, dedicating herself to prayer, penance, and service to others. She lived a life of true stewardship, exemplified by her work caring for the sick and poor. Her life of service and dedication to God has made her an important figure in the Catholic Church.

She is known for her ability to intercede on behalf of those facing impossible situations, and is best known for her association with roses, which often are used as a symbol of her life and legacy. It is said that as she neared the end of her life, Rita was bedridden from tuberculosis. It was continued on back cover

Saint John Before the Latin Gate

715 S. Johnstone Ave.

Bartlesville, OK 74003

(918) 336-4353

www.stjohn-bartlesville.org

Saint James Catholic Church

5500 Douglas Ln. Bartlesville, OK 74006

(918) 335-0844

www.saintjamescatholicparish.org

The Patron Saint of Impossible Causes:

continued from page 7

then that she asked a cousin who had come to visit for a rose from the garden in her old home. As it was January, her cousin did not expect to find any roses, but there was a single rose in bloom, which was brought back to Rita at the convent. Rita passed away four months later, on May 22, 1457. Following her death, she was buried at the Basilica of Cascia.

Today, St. Rita is venerated as the patron saint of several causes, including desperate and impossible

situations, abuse victims, and marital problems. Rita was beatified by Pope Urban VIII in 1627 and canonized by Pope Leo XIII on May 24, 1900. Her feast day is celebrated on May 22.

As we look to St. Rita’s life and example, we can learn much about what it means to be a disciple of Christ in our own time. We can strive to emulate her virtues of compassion, forgiveness, and humility, seeking to serve others and live a life that reflects our faith.

She lived a life of true stewardship, exemplified by her work caring for the sick and poor.

St. Rita