Mind your manners
A fading art, etiquette is still important in modern times
BY MADDIE SCOTT Staff writer
t our home in Covington, my Cuban mother taught me to chew with my mouth closed. And that was the extent of my table manners.
My mom cooked every night, mostly American or Cuban food, and we only went to restaurants for special occasions.
Now don’t get me wrong I’m no heathen at the dinner table, but I didn’t know until recently that placing a napkin on your lap is the first thing to do once sitting for a meal
In my new role as a food writer I recognized that my etiquette knowledge needed a refresh.
April Palombo Setliff is the pinnacle of grace. She started Red Stick Refinement in 2018 in Baton Rouge, a business teaching lads and lassies like me the ins and outs of etiquette She started the venture inspired by her interest in entertaining.
Refinement.
BY ROBIN MILLER Staff writer
From St Landry Parish to the big stage
Besides winning two Grammys, Terrance Simien has also played zydeco music in 45 countries, performed at President Bill Clinton’s inaugural ball and shared the stage and studio with Paul Simon, Robert Palmer Los Lobos, Stevie Wonder and other stars. His music was featured in the Disney animated classic “The Princess and the Frog,” along with its new spinoff ride at Disney World, “Tiana’s Bayou Adventure.” Not bad for a Creole country boy from Mallet, a community in rural St. Landry Parish. One of Simien’s fondest memories came during his first European tour in 1988, while opening shows for Fats Domino and Sarah Vaughn. He sensed an unusual smell in the hallway of his fancy hotel in Bern, Switzerland.
“When I walked down the hall, it was Fats Domino cooking red beans and rice in his room,” Simien said recently on my “Zydeco Stomp” radio show “He called me ‘ecrevisse,’ crawfish in French. “He said, ‘Taste that. What you think it needs?’ It’s perfect,” Simien said. “He said, ‘I’m going to fix you a little plate, but don’t tell nobody I don’t have enough for everybody.’ That will always be the best red beans and rice I’ve had in my life.”
Simien and his band, Zydeco Experience, will serve up a rare home performance Saturday at Rock ‘n’ Bowl in downtown Lafayette. Simien’s first show in Lafayette in six years comes as thousands are in town for the 51st annual Festivals Acadiens et Créoles. Memories started early for Simien who, at the age of 19, was recording with Paul Simon. Two years later, a performance in the landmark movie “The Big Easy” followed. His national splash opened cultural doors. Simien, along with the Sam Brothers Five, fellow St. Landry Parish natives, were the only teenagers playing zydeco.
“Everybody else was 20 years older than us,” said Simien, who turned 60 on Sept. 3. “What happened is what you wanted to happen. Now, there are more young people playing the music than us old dudes.
At its essence having good etiquette is the ability to adapt to social situations, she said, while also being a confidence builder for those who practice it.
“If you treat other people with kindness, you’ll make the right eti-
“I started thinking,” Setliff said, “‘How do I teach the next generation to be good hosts and hostesses?’ So Red Stick Refinement stems from that. How to throw a good party is the bottom line and make people feel comfortable and make a memorable experience.”
quette decision,” she said. Setliff welcomed me to her home recently for a private lesson on table etiquette.
Utensils, napkins and flashbacks
First, I learned how to set the table using her grandmother’s silver,
ä See ETIQUETTE, page 3G
“I’m trying to do my little bit to preserve those little details of life to make someone else’s day better.” APRIL PALOMBO SETLIFF, Red Stick Refinement founder
At the beginning of Taylor
Swift’s second track on her celebrated new album, “The Life of a Showgirl,” she asks, “Elizabeth Taylor Do you think it’s forever?” Swift parallels her life with that of the legendary actress another Taylor comparing their timelines of whirl-
wind fame and stormy love lives. But does that superstardom last forever? Elizabeth Taylor trends According to Google Trends, “Who is Elizabeth Taylor?” searches were up 9,000%, as Swifties rush to discover the work of the actress, whose glow seems to have faded among the young.
Now, that doesn’t mean the masses have forgotten Taylor It’s just that most Swifties don’t watch Turner Classic Movies. So, naturally, they
“I’m so proud to see that happen, to know that the music is going to live on. And they keep coming.”
Throughout his 45 years of touring, Simien has also been an advocate for Louisiana music, tourism and his native Creole culture. He and his wife/manager Cynthia lobbied the Recording Academy for seven years to establish a Best Zydeco or Cajun Music Album category from 2008 to 2011.
“Creole for Kidz and the History of Zydeco,” Simien’s interactive, education program, has
ä See SIMIEN, page 3G
Herman Fuselier
STAFF PHOTOS BY JAVIER GALLEGOS
Founder of Red Stick Refinement April Setliff, left, and reporter Maddie Scott place dessert spoons above dinner plates while preparing table settings during an etiquette lesson at Setliff’s home
A table setting meticulously placed by April Setliff, founder of Red Stick
ASK THE EXPERTS
Researcher works toward waterfowl conservation
LSU graduate returns to department to help benefit Louisiana environment
BY LAUREN CHERAMIE Staff writer
Janice Pearson graduated from LSU with a bachelor’s degree in natural resources and ecology management with a minor in oceanography and coastal sciences. Now, she’s turning her passion into purpose as she steps into a role with LSU’s School of Renewable Natural Resources as a wildlife research technician.
For three years, Pearson was a student worker who assisted with waterfowl studies and wildlife distribution research at the Reproductive Biology Center at the LSU AgCenter’s Central Research Station. Today she works with that same department to visit state wildlife management areas to conduct field work and collect data on Black-bellied whistling ducks, wood ducks and mottled ducks.
One of the most rewarding parts of her job is working with the next generation of conservationists.
What solutions does your research with the LSU AgCenter work toward solving?
On my various projects that I assist on, we’re working toward research for waterfowl conservation. We work hand in hand with the Louisiana Department of Wildlife and Fisheries.
One project I’ve been working on has to do with movement ecology, studying the movements of various species that migrate down here in the winter. We’re looking at their sanctuary use and also taking autonomous recording units, ARUs, to analyze for gunshots in the area.
We’re taking that data and overlapping it with transmitter data to put transmitters on the backs of northern pintails. The data gives us a better idea of how we can manage the species so that we’re not risking them not returning. Or
it gives us a better opportunity to do more studies on survival rates or population data.
Why is Louisiana an important place for this research to happen?
Louisiana is a critical point, especially in the winter, for waterfowl As birds are migrating south, most duck and waterfowl species converge at the base of the Mississippi River that feeds into the Gulf in the winter, and that’s where they winter
You see more species of waterfowl here than you do anywhere else in the United States that converge all at once. That’s what makes Louisiana super special.
For a hunter, you can go duck hunting and kill six or seven different species in one hunt. For research purposes, that gives other researchers the opportunity to come and start studies in Louisiana to get a better idea of these birds.
How do you catch and band birds safely?
The primary technique we use is called rocket netting. Basically, we use rockets that shoot nets out over the birds, and then it safely holds the birds.
We go out and take the birds out of the nets and put them in a crate. Then we age, sex and band them. We have a lot of safety protocols in place for rockets, and we take that very seriously, but it’s one of the best tactics to get as many birds possible. They also use walk-in traps that are similar to a snare, but it does not tighten. It doesn’t harm the bird, and it’s a little bit safer than rocket netting.
Banding is important for us because it can tell us where that duck is, how long the duck survived and the age of the duck. We can use those things for survival rates. That also gives us an idea of their movement.
Then, we have a universal data sheet that we upload the data to so that we can track all of the birds that we band.
What’s the most rewarding part of working with waterfowl?
Getting hands-on experiences and learning about the species itself is rewarding. Being able to actually be a part of the solution
Nomination period opens for 2025 Inspirit Awards
Propose someone who makes a difference
BY JAN RISHER Staff writer
Louisiana Inspired is all about shining a light on people and organizations who are working toward solutions in Louisiana neighborhoods, communities, towns, cities and throughout the state — it’s work that takes extra effort by special people, demonstrating the good stuff of the human spirit.
We are announcing the 2025 Inspirit Awards.
Webster says inspirit implies instilling life, energy, courage or vigor into something
We are looking for people who do just that — and to do so, we need you! By Nov. 12, you can nominate the people you know or have watched make a positive difference in the lives of others at www.nola. com/site/forms/the_inspirit_award/.
We encourage nominations of people of all ages — those who systematically go about doing their best to make the world a better place. We want generalists who do all sorts of things. We want those who are single-mindedly devoted to one issue. We want the young and the old, people in cities and those in rural communities across Louisiana. Wewantpeopleinschools,including students and teachers. We are looking for people who started trying to solve a problem this year and those who have been working at it for years. We want to learn about business people who have made a positive difference in the lives of their employees or the world at large. We want to learn about teachers who developed an innovative approach
Q&A WITH JANICE PEARSON LSU WILDLIFE RESEARCHER
and making contacts in the waterfowl world, professionally is rewarding. Seeing the birds converge is just a beautiful thing. It’s pretty amazing. With black bellies, they used to never be here. So seeing them now is just incredible, plus learning about them In my time assisting in research with LSU, I have been able to teach undergrad students how to band, and I’m teaching them the ropes. That was really rewarding to see them get excited about it, because that helps the whole conservation community
When they’re out there in the field, refueling that passion for them to stay in the field, it’s really rewarding because we need people in our field who want to work toward saving what we have.
Email Lauren Cheramie at lauren.cheramie@theadvocate. com.
to solving a problem We want to learn about musicians and artists of all kinds, nonprofit executives and volunteers and unsung heroes and heroines who don’t fit into any of those categories
The Inspirit award winners from 2024 were:
n Julie Rabalais, of Lafayette, the founder of For the Birds Acadiana, a nonprofit bird rescue and rehab organization.
n Darryl Durham, of New Orleans, founder and director of Anna’s Place Nola, a nonprofit that focuses on breaking the cycle of trauma for economically disadvantaged youth in New Orleans.
n Jennifer Richardson, of Baton Rouge, organizer of Keep Tiger Town Beautiful, a group of volunteers committed to cleaning up litter in Baton Rouge.
n Kathleen Cannino, of Covington, leader of a statewide campaign to get cameras in special ed classrooms.
n Rashida Ferdinand, of New Orleans, founder of a nonprofit that runs a park, local market, food pantry and economic development initiative in the Lower 9th Ward.
n Libbie Sonnier, of New Orleans, CEO of Louisiana Policy Institute for Children.
n Warren Perrin, of Acadiana, advocate and activist for Cajun and Creole recognition and representation.
The nomination process:
n Focuses on people who are working toward solutions in their workplaces, schools, neighborhoods, communities and state
n Seeks stories of impact shared by nominators
n Lifts up details of personal stories that inspire change Award recipients will be announced in the Dec. 21 edition of Louisiana Inspired.
Email Jan Risher at jan.risher@ theadvocate.com.
STAFF FILE PHOTO BY HILARY SCHEINUK
A black-bellied whistling duck takes off from a small flock bobbing along in Capitol Lake on March 18 in Baton Rouge.
PROVIDED PHOTO
Janice Pearson, a wildlife research technician with LSU’s School of Renewable Natural Resources, works in the field in Point-Aux-Chenere to conduct mottled duck banding with the Louisiana Department of Wildlife and Fisheries.
STAFF FILE PHOTO BY SCOTT THRELKELD Kathleen Cannino is a special education advocate who helped pass a Louisiana law giving parents the right to ask schools to install classroom cameras.
STAFF FILE PHOTO BY BRETT DUKE
Darryl Durham, founder of Anna’s Place NOLA, leads a choir class during an after-school youth program in New Orleans on Dec. 5.
STAFF FILE PHOTO BY MATTHEW PERSCHALL Rashida Ferdinand, founder of a nonprofit that runs a park, local market, food pantry, stands in Sankofa Wetland Park and Nature Trail in New Orleans.
PROVIDED PHOTO Libbie Sonnier is CEO of Louisiana Policy Institute for Children
STAFF FILE PHOTO BY JAVIER GALLEGOS
Jennifer Richardson, founder of Keep Tiger Town Beautiful, stands next to five bags of trash collected along the Siegen Lane and Interstate 10 Frontage Road intersection on Dec. 11.
STAFF FILE PHOTO BY BRAD BOWIE
Bird rescuer and rehabilitator Julie Rabalais holds a pelican under her care at For the Birds of Acadiana.
STAFF FILE PHOTO BY LESLIE WESTBROOK Warren Perrin hosts the Canadian band Les Hay Babies at his cottage in the community of Henry.
CURIOUS
Louisiana, but did she ever
film any here?”
Did she film in Louisiana?
Well, no. But she came close Taylor, along with fellow Hollywood legends Montgomery Clift and Eva Marie Saint, came to Natchez, Mississippi, for the 1956 filming of “Raintree County.” Natchez is directly across the Mississippi River from Vidalia, 60 miles north of St. Francisville on U.S. 61. Louisiana newspapers, including The Advocate’s afternoon sister paper, The State-Times, and The Times-Picayune sent photographers and reporters to the filming, most of which took place at Windsor Ruins, which stand along Mississippi Hwy 522, the same road that leads to Alcorn State University Alcorn figures into this story, because the ornate cast-iron stairs fronting the ruins, on which Taylor, Clift and Saint were both filmed and photographed, now lead to the front doors of Alcorn’s Oakland Memorial Chapel. Back in 1956, they still stood at what would have been the entrance to Windsor Plantation.
As for Windsor its 12 Corinthian columns still stand. From 1861 to 1890, the mansion’s three stories once overlooked the Mississippi River from a distance. It was destroyed by fire after a party guest tossed a lit cigar in the trash on Feb. 17, 1890. The ruins are now maintained as a historic site by the Mississippi State Department of Archives and History The site was also used in the 1996 film “Ghosts of Mississippi.”
Back to “Raintree County,” Edward Dmytryk directed the MGM Civil War epic love triangle among John Wickliff Shawnessy, played by Clift; his hometown sweetheart, Nell, played by Saint; and the irresistible New Orleans Southern belle, Susanna Drake, played by Taylor
The story begins in Shawnessy’s home of Raintree County in Indiana, and it’s where he returns with a pregnant Susanna at the outbreak of the Civil War.
The cast and crew stayed at the Natchez Eola Hotel during filming, and according to reporter-photographer Charles East’s Aug. 1, 1956, feature in The State-Times, filming was supposed to move to Rosedown Plantation in St Francisville afterward but was canceled.
Elizabeth Taylor in New Orleans
But that doesn’t mean Taylor never spent time in Louisiana. She was a frequent visitor to New Orleans, often staying at the Audubon Cottages at 509 Dauphine St. in the French Quarter “She stayed here 27
SIMIEN
Continued from page 1G
been presented to more than 250,000 K-12 students across the globe
Simien still averages 50,000 miles on the road each year He has no plans to park his touring van yet “I love my job to where it doesn’t even seem like a job,” he said. “After all these years, I’m in condition. As long as I have my
times,” said Shawn Gray, the boutique hotel’s manager “She always stayed in cottage No. 3.” Audubon Cottages, built in the late 18th century, once were home to ornithologist, naturalist and painter John James Audubon and now operate as an intimate cottage-style hotel retreat in the French Quarter
“All cottages have their own private courtyards,” Gray said. “And I think that’s probably one of the big hits for stars, because they don’t have to interact with anybody Once you walk into the alleyway, you can go into your cottage, and you can close the entrance door to your cottage and close the entrance door to your courtyard.”
Gray said actress Kathy Bates recently stayed at Audubon Cottages.
The hotel hasn’t marked cottage No. 3 with a brass plaque or any other kind of commemoration of Taylor’s stay, but its website does note her preference for the cottage.
Taylor’s name remains big at Audubon Cottages, just as it is in Hollywood history
For Swifties still searching “Who is Elizabeth Taylor?” on Google, she was born on Feb. 27, 1932, to socially prominent American parents in London, England. Her first starring role was at age 12 in “National Velvet,” opposite a 24-year-old Mickey Rooney
She would move on to adulthood to star in such iconic films as “Giant,” opposite James Dean in 1956; Tennessee Williams’ “Cat on a Hot Tin Roof,” opposite Paul Newman in 1958; “Butterfield 8” in 1960 opposite her fourth husband, Eddie Fisher; the epic “Cleopatra,” opposite her fifth husband, Richard Burton, in 1963; Edward Albee’s “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf,” again costarring with Burton in 1966; and “The Sandpiper,” again opposite Burton in 1967.
And as mentioned in the lyrics of Swift’s song, Taylor did, indeed, have violet eyes. Later in life, she maintained a friendship with the King of Pop Michael Jackson, and she co-founded the American Foundation for AIDS Research in 1985 and the Elizabeth Taylor AIDS Foundation in 1991.
Outside of her movies and philanthropy, she was constantly pursued by the paparazzi through her eight marriages, which included twice to Burton She died in 2011 at age 79. And now, thanks to Swift, her name and her legend — are trending once again
Do you have a question about something in Louisiana that’s got you curious? Email your question to curiouslouisiana@ theadvocate.com. Include your name, phone number and the city where you live.
health and God is pointing me in that direction, I hope I can play music until I can’t do nothing else.”
Herman Fuselier is executive director of the St. Landry Parish Tourist Commission. A longtime journalist covering Louisiana music and culture, he lives in Opelousas. His “Zydeco Stomp” show airs at noon Saturdays on KRVS 88.7 FM.
ETIQUETTE
Continued from page 1G
which included soup, salad, dinner and dessert utensils, plus a butter knife. I asked Setliff to quiz me a couple of times as I pointed to each utensil and named its function. I’m an enthusiastic student, and she let me know that she appreciated my cheering when I got answers right.
Setting the table took about 20 minutes. As I placed the items, Setliff explained certain details, like how the teeth on forks are called tines and how they’re longer on a dinner fork than a salad fork.
When it was time to sit down, I entered from the chair’s right side per Setliff’s instruction.
“What’s the very first thing we do when we sit down at the table?” Setliff asked.
I learned the answer to that question when I grabbed lunch with my editor Jan Risher for the first time in August I told her I didn’t know much about table etiquette and genuinely asked for pointers. She told me about the napkin tip and had the idea for this article.
Flash forward to sitting in Setliff’s dining room. I felt a burst of excitement because I knew an answer I blurted out my excitement making me forget proper grammar, “It’s napkin, right?”
Close enough.
Setliff said I was correct, and, once again, I cheered.
She gave me more details about exactly how to fold the napkin in half and place it longways across my lap, up to my bellybutton, using the inside corners of the napkin to dab my mouth throughout the meal.
Lunch time
Once seated, I folded the napkin as instructed, feeling like I was getting strapped into a roller coaster It was time to eat.
I’m a soup enthusiast It’s my favorite kind of food to cook and eat. Yet, I learned I’ve been breaking just about every single soup etiquette rule there is. There’s a correct utensil to eat soup with, a more rounded, short and stoutlooking spoon. Setliff and I spent several minutes learning how to properly hold the utensil.
Once I grasped the spoon correctly, I thought we were ready to rock and roll with eating, but I was wrong. More was to be learned. The motion of dipping a spoon into the soup bowl is done a particular way — scooping the soup away from yourself and then bringing the spoon to the mouth.
When eating bread, the correct way is to tear off a small piece, butter it with the correct knife and then eat it. (I’m not sure how I’ll implement this rule at Texas Roadhouse, a place where survival instincts say to shove as much bread and whipped butter into the mouth as possible.)
When eating the main course, Setliff told me to grip the fork like a pencil and switch hands between cutting food and putting food in my mouth — according to American style. She also explained the continental style of using utensils, and I practiced both on a slice of lasagna.
She advised I place the fork and knife down after every four bites to sip water or dab my mouth She also told me how to properly hold teacups versus coffee cups. Pinkies down, she said.
And when the meal is over the napkin is placed loosely to the left of the plate.
A dying art
Mid lasagna, I had a burning question.
“Where are you with elbows on the table?” I asked. It depends, she said. She personally chooses to never rest on the table.
“I don’t think elbows are ever an option at the table,” she said. “It may be forearms depending on who you ask and what country you’re in.”
“I always encourage people just to go with the flow of the vibe, whatever the circumstances,” she said. “Sure, if you’re at The Chimes, I think it’s fine. But if you’re at Ruth’s Chris, maybe not.”
Setliff’s approach to etiquette is more casual than regimented. That’s the buy-in, she said It has to be wanted by people to do it.
Today, etiquette is all about convenience — and many etiquette traditions aren’t practiced as much as they were in years past. For example, many people keep their family’s china boxed in the attic and don’t use it, Setliff said.
Growing up, Setliff didn’t practice much table etiquette in her house, and her mother still jokes about which utensil to use. Her grandmother’s house was a different story where there’d be all sorts of pretty things to set the table with, Setliff said. That’s where she developed an admiration for the practice.
“I use this silver every day,” Setliff said about her grandmother’s silver “That’s what we use. I’m not the norm anymore.”
Many people use paper plates, which there isn’t anything wrong with, she said, and it’s more work to clean normal plates. Thank-you notes are another example of something not practiced as much, especially since people can send a quick thank-you text. Lots of young people don’t know how to address an envelope either It’s sad but it’s the times, according to Setliff.
“I’m trying to do my little bit to preserve those little details of life to make someone else’s day better,” she said. Goodbyes
Setliff likes to give her guests a small gift before leaving, specifically something to make them laugh. She gave me Snoop Dogg’s cookbook. I can’t wait to cook one of the recipes. She requested I tell her if I do. I promised to send pictures.
I’m not going to lie, I thought etiquette was a little over-the-top before this, but this lesson completely changed my mind. I didn’t realize before that etiquette stems in creating comfort for the people around you.
Being kind to one another, right? That’s beautiful, and it’s something this world needs more of.
After a hug goodbye, I walked out of Setliff’s front door I climbed into my blue Honda Fit with a bright orange gift bag in my backseat, a print copy of the etiquette PowerPoint presentation and a cookie dough ball dessert from BLDG 5 that she offered I take to-go. It felt like coming home after a really great night out with close friends.
I had a full belly, a happy heart and glowing pride for the newfound knowledge of every dining utensil’s correct function, and Setliff was responsible for all of it.
I’ll have to write her a thank-you note.
