Letters from CAMP Rehoboth, Vol. 34, No. 4

Summertime!

And the Livin’ Is Lazy. Hazy. Crazy.

C R E A T I N G

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M O R E

P O S I T I V E

R E H O B O T H

May 17, 2024 Volume 34, Number 4 camprehoboth.com

inside 4 In Brief

26 Community News

6 From the Executive Director

28 Out & About

KIM LEISEY, PHD

ERIC PETERSON

8 President’s View

32 It’s My Life

WES COMBS

10 Vice President’s View LESLIE LEDOGAR

12 CAMP News 14 Women’s FEST Highlights NANCY SAKADUSKI

18 Getting to Know You A Glimpse Behind the Scenes BILL FUCHS

20 CAMP Rehoboth Strategic Plan 22 The Writing Life DANIELLE ARIANO

THIS ISSUE

VOLUME 34, NUMBER 4 • MAY 17, 2024

92 Booked Solid

TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

94 View Point

The Bear Truth

Dancing in Our Truth RICHARD ROSENDALL

98 Deep Inside Hollywood

For Whom the Bel-tane Tolls MICHAEL THOMAS FORD

34 Words Matter

ROMEO SAN VICENTE

CLARENCE FLUKER

NANCY SAKADUSKI

102 Button Up

Things My Mom Taught Me

36 Read All About It

108 You Say Turtle; I Say Tortoise

STEPHEN RASKAUSKAS

TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

38 OUTlook

Women’s FEST Broadwalk on the Boardwalk. See page 14.

Pink Sunsets

BETH SHOCKLEY

42 Straight Talk

Raising the Flag for PFLAG DAVID GARRETT

46 Fitness Month Motion Is Lotion

JON ADLER KAPLAN

24 Health & Wellness

Many Roads Lead to Health SHARON MORGAN

50 Historical Headliners

74 Vacation or Staycation

110 Talking Trash (and Recycling)

CHRISTOPHER MOORE

JEFF DANNIS

ANN APTAKER

78 Be A Sport!

114 We Remember

Music in a Man’s World: Billy Tipton

52 By the Lanterns’ Bright Glow

Matty and Nathanael’s Excellent Adventure NANCY SAKADUSKI

56 CAMP Stories

They Came to Play CONNIE FOX

80 CAMP Library Chronicles Autograph Hound GLENN LASH

Franken Toes and Gastronomical Woes

82 Celebrity Interview

62 Sea Salt Table

88 The Real Dirt

ED CASTELLI

ERIC WAHL

RICH BARNETT

Couscous Tuna Salad

64 CAMPshots FEST Festivities!

ON THE COVER Summer Love

Cover photo by Murray Archibald

Rob Anderson’s Gay Science MICHAEL COOK

Barking for Dogwood

90 CAMP Arts

LESLIE SINCLAIR & JOE GFALLER

68 The Magic of Music PATTIE CINELLI

See page 46

Letters from CAMP Rehoboth welcomes submissions.

Email editor@camprehoboth.com. Photographs must be high resolution (300 dpi). Documents should be sent as attachments in Microsoft Word®. Deadline for submissions is two weeks prior to the issue release date.

Letters to the Editor (up to 300 words) are published at the discretion of the Editor on a space-available basis.

Letters may be edited for length or clarity.

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MAY 17, 2024

EDITOR Marj Shannon EDITORIAL ASSOCIATE Matty Brown DESIGN AND LAYOUT Mary Beth Ramsey ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Tricia Massella DISTRIBUTION Mark Wolf CONTRIBUTORS: Ann Aptaker, Danielle Ariano, Rich Barnett, Matty Brown, Ed Castelli, Pattie Cinelli, Wes Combs, Michael Cook, Jeffrey Dannis, Clarence Fluker, Michael Thomas Ford, Connie Fox, Bill Fuchs, David Garrett, Joe Gfaller, Jon Adler Kaplan, Glenn Lash, Kim Leisey, Leslie Ledogar, Tricia Massella, Christopher Moore, Sharon Morgan, Eric Peterson, Mary Beth Ramsey, Stephen Raskauskas, Richard Rosendall, Nancy Sakaduski, Terri Schlichenmeyer, Marj Shannon, Beth Shockley, Leslie Sinclair, Romeo San Vicente, Eric Wahl

Letters from CAMP Rehoboth is published 11 times per year, between February and December, as a program of CAMP Rehoboth Inc., a non-profit community service organization. CAMP Rehoboth seeks to create a more positive environment of cooperation and understanding among all people. Revenue generated by advertisements supports CAMP Rehoboth’s purpose as outlined in our mission statement.

The inclusion or mention of any person, group, or business in Letters from CAMP Rehoboth does not, nor is it intended in any way, to imply sexual orientation or gender identity. The content of the columns are the views and opinions of the writers and may not indicate the position of CAMP Rehoboth, Inc. © 2024 by CAMP Rehoboth, Inc. All rights reserved by CAMP Rehoboth. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any form without the prior written permission of the editor.

From the Editor

CAMP REHOBOTH

MISSION STATEMENT AND PURPOSE

BY MARJ SHANNON, EDITOR

MISSION

CAMP Rehoboth is an LGBTQ+ community center determined to Create A More Positive (CAMP) environment that is inclusive of all sexual orientations and gender identities in southern Delaware and beyond. We seek to promote cooperation, understanding among all people, and well-being, as we continue our to work to build a safer community with room for all.

VISION

CAMP Rehoboth envisions communities in Southern Delaware and beyond where all LGBTQ+ people thrive.

PURPOSE

Promoting the health and wellness of our community through a variety of programs including HIV testing and counseling, mental health support, fitness classes, mindfulness classes, support for LGBTQ youth, and building community and support.

Promoting artistic expressions and creative thinking, and giving aid to artists and craftspeople with an emphasis on the works of LGBTQ people.

Advocating for our community to build a safe and inclusive community through voter information, education, and registration; and analysis of issues and candidates.

Education and outreach to the larger community, including sensitivity training seminars, and printed materials to promote positive images of LGBTQ people and our allies.

Networking resources and information by publishing a magazine, and functioning as an alternative tourist bureau and information center.

PRESIDENT Wesley Combs VICE PRESIDENT Leslie Ledogar SECRETARY Pat Catanzariti TREASURER Polly Donaldson AT-LARGE DIRECTORS Amanda Mahony Albanese, Lewis Dawley, Mike DeFlavia, David Garrett, Jenn Harpel, Kim Leisey (non-voting), Michelle Manfredi, and Teri Seaton

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nd, just like that—it’s summer! Well, almost. In any case, “the season” is upon us and we’re excited that it—and you—are here.

Before we race headlong into that—maybe you were among the thousands who attended Women’s FEST? What a great time was had by oh, so many! We have highlights and a sports wrap-up (see pages 14 and 78). We also have dates for next year’s FEST: April 10-13, 2025. Mark your calendars—it’s sure to be FESTive!

Now, back to the upcoming season—what does this issue of Letters have to offer? First up, as we approach Memorial Day, a piece on Fort Miles. Now part of Cape Henlopen State Park, Fort Miles was a key component of our nation’s coastal defense from World War II to the mid-1970s. Writer Nancy Sakaduski (and friends) recently joined a lantern-lit tour of the installation; see her account on page 52.

We also have lots of fun-in-the-sun reads. Christopher Moore has vacation advice you’ll love—see page 74. Ed Castelli has the perfect summer comestible—easy, breezy, and tasty. Beth Shockley waxes nostalgic about Rehoboth’s gorgeous pink skies. And, just in time for outdoor concert season, Pattie Cinelli reflects on how much music has meant to her over the years.

Speaking of music—Bill Fuchs introduces us to the “men behind the curtain” (well, not all of them—one is front-and-center; one is off-to-the-side) of the CAMP Rehoboth Chorus concerts. Read all about them—and look around for these folks at a June performance as they bring you another opening of another show.

Looking for the perfect summer read? Terri Schlichenmeyer has a suggestion; Danielle Ariano has another. James Sears has a new book, Queering Rehoboth Beach: Beyond the Boardwalk; see Stephen Raskauskas’s interview with him for more. CAMP Rehoboth will be hosting a book launch event with James on Sunday, June 2, at 4:00 p.m. Get that on the calendar, too.

What else? There’s CAMP Rehoboth’s Strategic Plan—see highlights on page 20. And, of course, we’re looking ahead to Pride—see CAMP News for a partial list of ways we’ll be celebrating. (Watch camprehoboth.com for updates.) And in Community News, read about Pride events involving two local partners—the Rehoboth Beach Historical Society and Museum, and the Rehoboth Beach Film Society. Both events promise some great entertainment (and no doubt some poignant moments).

We can’t wait to enjoy summer with you! ▼

EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR Kim Leisey

CAMP REHOBOTH 37 Baltimore Avenue, Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971 tel 302-227-5620 | email editor@camprehoboth.com www.camprehoboth.com

CAMP Rehoboth, Inc. is tax-exempt under section 501(c)(3) of the United States Internal Revenue Code. Contributions to CAMP Rehoboth are considered charitable contributions for federal income tax purposes and may be deducted to the fullest extent of the law.

A copy of our exemption document is available for public inspection.

MAY 17, 2024

3 Letters

Summer Cadet Training

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n Friday, April 19, CAMP Rehoboth hosted its annual LGBTQ+ Diversity Training for the City of Rehoboth Beach’s summer cadets. Cadets were engaged and open with questions about sexual orientation and gender identity. “It’s important that our city’s cadets understand the population they serve,” said Kim Leisey, PhD, Executive Director at CAMP Rehoboth.

Special thanks to Lt. Will Sullivan and the City of Rehoboth Beach Police Department for hosting this training and continuing its relationship with CAMP Rehoboth for over 30 years.

For those interested in partnering with CAMP Rehoboth for LGBTQ+ Diversity Training, please contact info@camprehoboth.com. ▼ Pictured: Executive Director Kim Leisey, PhD, speaks with the Rehoboth Beach summer cadets.

We Have a Winner!

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r. Lori Dewald— the long-time organizer of a women’s tennis league that plays at Cape Henlopen High School courts—has received the prestigious Ann E. Nolte Academic Writing Award. The award, received from the Foundation for the Advancement of Health Education, is the highest given for academic writing in the field of public health. ▼

Wear Orange Weekend

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n Friday, June 7, from 4:00-6:00 p.m., join CAMP Rehoboth and Moms Demand Action for a BoardWALK to end gun violence.

Attendees are encouraged to wear orange that day to honor National Gun Violence Awareness Day. Meet at the Rehoboth Bandstand for a photo op, followed by the walk on the boards. ▼

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CROP at SDTR

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great crew of workers representing the CAMP Rehoboth Outreach Program (CROP) volunteered for three hours on the Friday morning of Women’s FEST at the Southern Delaware Therapeutic Riding Center (SDTR). After learning about SDTR, three teams of workers helped scrub horse stalls, perform maintenance on farm equipment, clean the sign out front, and help set up for their Derby Day fundraiser. The day was a win-win for everyone! ▼

CAMP Families

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AMP Rehoboth is looking for community members to help lead activities this summer for our CAMP Families program. This group is intended as a space for families of all kinds—including LGBTQ+ parents, parents of LGBTQ+ children, allies, and a mix of all or in-between—to connect and gather to share their experiences. For more information or to express interest, reach out to kim@ camprehoboth.com. ▼

Fay Jacobs Scholarship Endowed

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AMP Rehoboth is excited to announce that the Fay Jacobs Scholarship is fully endowed through the Delaware Community Foundation, to fund future Letters from CAMP Rehoboth interns.

CAMP Rehoboth celebrated the scholarship at an event on Friday, April 12, hosted by members Karen Anderson and Brenda Dunn.

Special thanks to Karen, Brenda, and the entire host committee for their support. Overall, the event raised $17,020 for the scholarship.

Donations are still welcome to continue growing funds for this scholarship. Visit camprehoboth.com, click “Donate,” and select the “Fay Jacobs LGBTQ Youth Journalism” option to make a contribution. ▼

Title IX Final Rule AMP Rehoboth congratulates MariAims to Protect Queer C anne DeLorenzo for winning Women’s FEST Diamond Sponsor Olivia Travel’s Students Congrats, Marianne!

“A Taste of France” riverboat cruise to Burgundy and Provence. Marianne purchased her lucky raffle ticket at the Evie Simmons Memorial Golf Tournament. The trip sails from August 27 to September 3, 2024, and is the first-of-its-kind donation from Olivia, granting Marianne a deluxe stateroom for two.

Thank you, Olivia Travel! And fair winds and following seas to Marianne, later this summer! ▼

Book Launch Benefits CAMP Rehoboth

C

AMP Rehoboth extends its gratitude to local author Will Freshwater, who hosted a book launch at the Top of the Pines on March 23, with proceeds benefitting CAMP Rehoboth.

The event, which featured a conversation between Freshwater and Washington Blade editor Kevin Naff, celebrated the launch of the final installment in Freshwater’s Provincetown series, titled The Dark Horse. Freshwater reported that he’s working on a Rehoboth Beach series next.

The launch raised over $3,000 for CAMP Rehoboth’s programs. Thank you, Will, and all who donated! ▼

T

he US Department of Education has issued its long-awaited final rule on Title IX, which prohibits sex discrimination by any educational institution or program that receives federal financial assistance. While the rule contains many points of interest, including detailed procedural requirements for how schools should respond to complaints of sexual harassment or sexual assault, it also creates ground-breaking protections for LGBTQ+ students, faculty, staff, and others affiliated with a school or other education program. These requirements should have important implications for public and private schools throughout Delaware. The effective date of the new rule is August 1, 2024.

With limited exceptions, the Final Rule declares that any denial or discriminatory treatment against an LGBTQ+ student, faculty, staff, or other person is unlawful sex discrimination.

This includes any denial or restriction to full access to bathrooms, locker rooms, classes, or any educational activity based on an individual’s gender identity. This also includes appearance codes that discriminate based on gender identity, gender presentation, and inconsistency with sex stereotypes. The Final Rule discusses at length the extensive evidence of the traumatizing and health-harming effects of restrictions on bathrooms and locker rooms, and other discriminatory treatment of transgender persons.

However, the rule does not comment on housing for a specific sex nor participation in school athletic/sports teams. For the latter, the Education Department has a separate rulemaking proceeding, still pending, that proposes a rather nuanced approach to this issue. ▼

On the Cover

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ony Zacchei and Jacob Anthony grace the cover for Letters’ Memorial Day issue. Kicking off summer in true fashion, Tony and Jacob pose poolside in a nod to their favorite pool parties throughout the summer. Last summer, Tony and Jacob’s Memorial Day pool party generously benefitted CAMP Rehoboth.

Happy (almost) summer! ▼

La Red Health Fair

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n Wednesday, May 1, CAMP Rehoboth participated in the La Red Health Fair at the La Red Health Center in Georgetown, Delaware. Josh Sheets, CAMPsafe Program Coordinator, represented CAMP Rehoboth alongside partner organizations. “Several hundred people attended and had the opportunity to learn about all the health opportunities within our community,” said Josh.

Find out more about CAMPsafe at camprehoboth.com/health. ▼ MAY 17, 2024

5 Letters

From the Executive Director

BY KIM LEISEY, PHD

The Rituals of Summer

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he transition from spring to summer brings us a season of rituals. Rituals in the LGBTQ+ community are extremely important. They help us to feel fully human and connected. Rituals not only mark time they make time. They help us to understand and make meaning of beginnings, endings, our relationships, our social circles, and our identities.

May and June provide many opportunities to create rituals within our families, friend circles, and community. Graduation, Memorial Day, LGBTQ+ Pride Month, and Juneteenth will all take place in the next month. Establishing rituals around these events are important as we create and celebrate community.

For this year’s class of college graduates, there is excitement about graduating and celebrating their educational milestone “in person.” Many in the class of 2024 did not have an in-person high school graduation due to COVID. The rituals surrounding graduation can include gifts, trips, parties, and family barbecues.

Memorial Day is a day to pause and reflect on the ultimate sacrifice made by those who served in the military. Parades, family barbecues, wreath laying, and visiting cemeteries to honor the dead are some of the ways we honor those we have lost.

Although unrelated to those lost during wartime, the ritual of the opening of neighborhood pools is often a Memorial Day weekend event. Pool openings are used to mark the beginning of summer.

Thankfully our love and commitments can now be marked by weddings and the legality of marriage. The temperatures along the coast of Delaware this time of year make for a wonderful location to celebrate wedding rituals. Whether it’s a barefoot beach wedding, bird seed instead of rice, or shorts and Hawaiian shirts, our wedding rituals help us to make the occasion memorable.

The strength of creating meaning through rituals is not to be underestimated.

LGBTQ+ Pride month provides opportunities to celebrate our community and our love. Pride Month is held during June in honor of the uprising/riots in 1969 at the Stonewall Inn in Greenwich Village, New York. Marked by festivals (such as Delaware Pride in Dover on June 1), workshops, barbecues, and parties, LGBTQ+ Pride Month is a month of remembrance and celebration. A Pride ritual in our household is to place all of our LGBTQ+ Pride flags out for our neighbors to enjoy.

Juneteenth, now a federal holiday, commemorates June 19, 1865, when Major Granger ordered the final enforcement of the Emancipation Proclamation in Texas. Rituals marking this day may include family barbecues, festivals, and church services.

Rituals to mark and celebrate the

longest day of the year, Summer Solstice, include music, sun salutations, barbecues, bonfires, and time in nature (kayaking, hiking, etc.). Cape Henlopen State Park and our beaches provide an excellent place to create and hold rituals for this day. For us, an evening beach bonfire with friends helps to celebrate the connection we feel between ourselves and the sky above.

Throughout our relationship together, Kathy and I have developed rituals to replace family traditions that disappear when parents pass on and family becomes dispersed. Thanksgiving morning we love to participate in a turkey trot/ walk. Tickets to arts events have become a date night ritual. Home-cooked Sunday evening dinner allows us to connect before the busy work week begins.

The new year starts with sunrise at the beach on January 1. These are just a few of our rituals.

The strength of creating meaning through rituals is not to be underestimated. These days, the ambiguity of life and what is happening around us can drain our spiritual and emotional reserves. As we collectively move forward let’s find ways to mark our progress and celebrate our community. Let’s replenish our reserves by creating ways to mark life’s moments through rituals, together. ▼ Kim Leisey, PhD, is Executive Director of CAMP Rehoboth.

CAMP REHOBOTH THANKS OUR 2024 ANNUAL SPONSORS

For information on how to become a CAMP Rehoboth Annual Sponsor, email development@camprehoboth.com or call 302-227-5620.

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WAYS TO GIVE TO CAMP REHOBOTH CASH/CHECK

ONLINE GIVING

The fastest, most convenient way to make a gift to CAMP Rehoboth is to donate online at: camprehoboth.com/donate.

ERE H N SCA TE! A DON

To donate by check, please make your check payable to: CAMP Rehoboth 37 Baltimore Ave Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971

TO

PLANNED GIFTS

MATCHING GIFT

There are a number of ways you can use planned giving to build charitable giving into your life plans, even after death. Some can even help you lower your taxable income now! Consider planning ahead now and explore some of these ways for giving after life: Bequest Planned Gift Life Insurance Qualified Retirement Plan

Matching gifts are a great way to enhance your gift to CAMP Rehoboth. Please check with your company’s human resources department to determine if your company offers matching gifts.

ESTATE AND LIFE INCOME GIFTS A charitable gift from your estate is a favored method of giving that enables you to achieve your financial goals and benefit CAMP Rehoboth.

TRANSFER FROM AN IRA If you are 70 ½ years of age or older, a transfer from an IRA may be a beneficial way to support CAMP Rehoboth.

Contact our Development Manager, Laurie Thompson, at laurie@camprehoboth.com to learn more about these ways to give.

EIN # 51-0331962 © CAMP Rehoboth 2023

Give Today at camprehoboth.com MAY 17, 2024

7 Letters

President’s View

BY WESLEY COMBS

Home Sweet Home

S

ince my husband Greg and I made the decision to call Rehoboth Beach our primary residence, we have done our best to explore all that Delaware has to offer further south, west, and north. Prior to then, most of our time between Memorial Day and midSeptember was spent literally within the city limits of the nation’s summer capital.

Looking back, the possible enjoyment we might have experienced by visiting someplace new and different was far outweighed by the time it would take to get there because of the traffic and congestion on Route One. I know, this is a poor excuse— especially since I constantly preach to others that achieving a goal is an intentional process and not something left up to chance. When we visit any new city while on vacation, I scour the internet for lists of the top 10 things to do there, then cross reference it with recommendations from friends, and the result is a curated set of activities complete with all necessary details. This maniacal planning approach (as some of my friends would call it) reinforces what many already know about me: being spontaneous does not come naturally.

As the famous song from the musical La Cage aux Folles says, “I am what I am and what I am needs no excuses.”

This natural inquisitiveness is not only an innate part of how I approach upcoming travel, but my curiosity also allows me to better support my coaching and consulting clients by asking probing questions that lead to greater self-discovery. Call it a win-win for everyone—whether they like it or not.

One silver lining from the 10 months Greg and I spent at our home in Rehoboth during COVID was the ability to easily just drive around to escape the day-to-day monotony of isolation.

We visited beautiful and interesting and historic places—like Easton and St. Michael’s, Maryland—for the first time. How is that possible, you may Letters 8

MAY 17, 2024

be asking? Pre-COVID, with a burning desire to get to the beach and beat the traffic, taking a detour and extending an already dreaded commute was out of the question.

The choice to make Delaware our home base was complicated because what we loved about living in DC was access to a wide variety of arts and culture, supporting nonprofit causes

We now proudly tell people we are Delawareans, residing in a place that offers a laidback way of life, rich in natural beauty, arts, and culture. aligned with our interests and values, and of course friends we would not see as often. As we shared our feelings with those living full time in Sussex County, they were quick to offer suggestions regarding the local arts scene, and organizations they supported and why.

Because these were people we thought highly of, it became clear that making an informed decision meant there was work to do on our part.

It was time to leverage my inherent research skills and create a proverbial framework to tackle this challenge by asking ourselves the following questions.

First, why did we feel fulfilled when attending a show in DC? It was more about the enjoyment of the production and not the size of the venue or the star power of the cast.

Second, why were we supporting specific nonprofits? What gave us joy was contributing our time (how involved depended on capacity), talent (what

expertise could we offer), and treasure (providing financial support) with causes that impacted our communities as residents, as gay men, as faith-based people, and so on. Our commitment to give back to the community would require us to plant seeds with organizations in addition to CAMP Rehoboth, if Delaware would become our home.

Third, when it came to the friends part, we realized that like us they too were spending months at a time in cities outside of DC. So, where we lived did not necessarily correlate with the frequency of our time together.

What did we learn? Clear Space Theater Company produces a wide variety of high-quality shows featuring great local talent along with actors who have appeared on Broadway in New York. Seeing headliners like Jerry Seinfeld, Patti Labelle, Gladys Knight, and Diana Ross at Freeman Arts Pavilion is only a 40-minute drive from our house in Rehoboth, the same drive-time a similar venue is from our home in DC. Investing in organizations whose focus is caring for us as we age, and the LGBTQ+ community at large, is also a priority, which is why we support Beebe Healthcare. During a recent tour of their new surgical hospital on Warrenton Road, Beebe’s President and CEO, David Tam, discussed their partnership with Jefferson Health System. This offers Beebe patients access to nationally recognized physicians offering comprehensive care when needed.

We now proudly tell people we are Delawareans, residing in a place that offers a laid-back way of life, and is rich in natural beauty, arts, and culture.

More importantly, our neighbors share our values of making a difference in the world around us. In the words of my friend John Roane, “Life is good.” ▼ Wesley Combs is CAMP Rehoboth Board President.

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Let’s Get Started! 302-278-6100 37156 Rehoboth Ave Rehoboth Beach, DE Plenty of FREE Parking Phone or in-person appointments encouraged.

accentontravel.com

MAY 17, 2024

9 Letters

Vice President’s View

BY LESLIE LEDOGAR

Why Government Matters

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ay 1 is “Law Day,” designated in 1958 by then President Dwight D. Eisenhower as a day of national recognition of the importance of the rule of law. As the American Bar Association explains, “Law Day provides an opportunity to understand how law and the legal process protect our liberty, strive to achieve justice, and contribute to the freedoms that all Americans share.”

It is not until a change in the law hits home, however, that the importance of the rule of law becomes obvious and very personal. Consider the story of the Affordable Health Care Act (ACA)’s Section 1557 Regulation.

At the time that Congress enacted the ACA, Section 1557 was lauded as a health care milestone for the LGBTQ+ community and for racial and ethnic minorities, women, persons living with disabilities, and older persons. That’s because its non-discrimination provision prohibits discrimination on the basis of sex (along with race, color, national origin, disability, and age) under any health program, activity, or facility that receives federal financial assistance.

Regulations promulgated in 2016 by the Obama Administration to implement the ACA interpreted Section 1557 as expressly protecting individuals from discrimination on the basis of “gender identity and sex stereotyping” by defining “gender identity” as “an individual’s internal sense of gender,” and stating that “[a] transgender individual is an individual whose gender identity is different from the sex assigned to that at birth.”

Critics of the Section 1557 Regulation took direct aim at the Regulation’s definition of discrimination “on the basis of sex” that included discrimination on the basis of “gender identity” and “termination of pregnancy.” A court challenge to the Section 1557 Regulations brought toward the close of 2016, on the cusp of the transition to the Trump administration, resulted in a nationwide preliminary injunction barring the enforcement of Letters 10

MAY 17, 2024

the Section 1557 Regulations’ prohibition against discrimination on the basis of “gender identity.”

Thereafter, the Trump administration struck this provision, stating in the notice of regulatory action that it “…proposes to repeal the novel definition of ‘sex’ in the Section 1557 regulation in order to make

It is not until a change in the law hits home, however, that the importance of the rule of law becomes obvious and very personal. the Department’s regulations implementing Title IX through the Section 1557 Regulation more consistent with the Title IX regulations of other federal agencies.”

The proposal to repeal this so-called “novel definition” of sex was, in the opinion of many regulation watchers, a frontal assault on established federal jurisprudence that confirms that the sex nondiscrimination protections of ACA Section 1557 include protections against discrimination on the basis of gender identity.

The amendments therefore amounted to an illegal grab at the civil rights of a Constitutionally protected class of persons, namely transgender and gender non-conforming people who are seeking health care.

The Department’s statements that it was “committed to ensuring the civil rights of all individuals who access or seek to access health programs or activities of covered entities under Section 1557…” and that “[u]nder the proposed rule, HHS would continue to vigorously enforce all applicable existing laws and regulations that prohibit discrimination... based on HHS’s longstanding underlying civil rights regulations,” were particularly disingenuous, when the impact of the proposed rule was just the opposite of the Department’s stated intent.

That is because the intent, as con-

firmed by the Department, was that “HHS would enforce Section 1557 by returning to the government’s longstanding interpretation of ‘sex’ under the ordinary meaning of the word Congress used.” In the Department’s words, the longstanding meaning of “the term ‘sex’… does not refer to gender identity.” Really?

In the ensuing years, transgender people in Delaware and nationwide were not protected from discrimination under Section 1557. We will never know how many transgender people suffered needlessly because the regulation as amended expressly curtailed meaningful access to healthcare for individuals by targeting gender identity as a criterion for access to healthcare.

Fast forward to late April 2024, and we have the Biden Administration’s announcement of a new Section 1557 Regulation that restores and expands important protections to ensure everyone can receive the health insurance coverage and health care they need, free from discrimination.

The new regulations also include robust protections for patients with limited English proficiency, and express protections against discrimination based on pregnancy or having previously had an abortion.

As eloquently stated in the Whitman Walker Institute’s press release, “Critically, the [Biden] rule demonstrates a strong commitment to ensuring access for all by securing specific protections for some of our nation’s most marginalized communities, including transgender, nonbinary, and intersex people, people with limited English proficiency, people with disabilities, and people who are seeking reproductive health care.”

So, this is a case in point that government matters. We must continue to watch, participate, and speak up. The rule of law is very front and central, and can be very, very personal. ▼ Leslie Ledogar is CAMP Rehoboth Board Vice President.

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Do you sometimes just can’t get to the bathroom quick enough?

Is your worry starting to take over your daily life?

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Phone (302) 652-8990 • Fax (302) 652-8646 • www.BrandywineUC.com MAY 17, 2024

11 Letters

CAMPNews

Pride Month Listicle As Pride month approaches, check below for all the ways CAMP Rehoboth will be celebrating and partnering with others to celebrate living in authentic truth. The following events/programs are just a sample of ways CAMP Rehoboth will promote Pride. Check out camprehoboth.com often for the full and up-to-date listing.

Library Displays in Rehoboth Beach and Lewes Library CAMP Rehoboth will partner with the Rehoboth Beach Library and Lewes Public Library to host Pride displays in celebration of Pride Month.

Delaware Pride Festival

Saturday, June 1, 10:00 a.m.-5:00 p.m., Legislative Hall, Dover

The Delaware Pride Festival is the largest LGBTQ+ event in the state of Delaware. The Delaware Pride Festival is more than just a celebration of diversity, or a day to get the LGBTQ+ community together. It’s also an opportunity to reach out to the larger community in our state.

This event provides an opportunity for the State to see us, meet us, and (most importantly) get to know us as people: neighbors who have the same ambitions, troubles, and joys as everyone else.

Rehoboth Beach Pride Flag Raising Saturday, June 1, 9:00 a.m., Rehoboth Beach City Hall

engage with the rich tapestry of queer identity, history, and experience.

Queering Rehoboth Beach Sunday, June 2, 4:00 p.m.

On June 2, at 4:00 p.m., CAMP Rehoboth will host a book launch event for James Sears’s Queering Rehoboth Beach: Beyond the Boardwalk. Sears’s book chronicles the rise of the LGBTQ+ community in Rehoboth Beach, and its history through the early 2000s.

“It’s important to understand our past so that we can know how to chart our future,” said CAMP Rehoboth Executive Director Kim Leisey about the book and its launch. After a discussion of the history of LGBTQ+ life in Rehoboth Beach, conversation will open up to the community to talk about what’s transpired since the early 2000s, and what lies ahead. Register online.

Milton Pride

The City of Rehoboth Beach will celebrate Pride by raising the Pride flag in front of the Rehoboth Beach Convention Center. Mayor Stan Mills will read the Pride Proclamation on behalf of the City, and guests are invited to cheer on the raising.

Saturday, June 8, 4:00-8:00 p.m., Milton by the Quayside

Pride Unbound

Pride Paddle on the Broadkill River with The Nature Conservancy

Saturday, June 1-27; Opening reception: June 8, 2:00-4:00 p.m., the CAMP Rehoboth Gallery

Pride Unbound is an immersive art exhibition dedicated to showcasing the diverse voices and perspectives within the LGBTQ+ community. Through a variety of mediums, LGBTQ+ and queer artists share their talent and explore pertinent themes, inviting visitors to Letters 12

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CAMP Rehoboth is a sponsor at Mardi Gras-themed Milton Pride 2024.

Performers include Mama’s Black Sheep, Rainbow Chorale, and Christine Havrilla.

Sunday, June 9, 9:00 a.m., the Broadkill River from Milton to The Nature Conservancy’s McCabe Preserve

The Nature Conservancy invites friends of CAMP Rehoboth and our local LGBTQIA+ community members to join us for a fun and relaxing paddle down the beautiful Broadkill River.

Pride Film Festival

June 13-16, Cinema Art Theater, Lewes

The Rehoboth Beach Film Society (RBFS) is proud to present the 2024 PRIDE Film Festival in partnership with CAMP Rehoboth. The four-day festival will showcase LGBTQ+ documentaries, features, and international films.

Headlining this year’s PRIDE Film Festival is a 25-year retrospective screening of director Jim Fall’s classic film Trick, which follows the romantic misadventures of two young gay men in Manhattan (1999). Director Fall will attend the Trick screening on Saturday evening—join for a retrospective evening with a party and the film.

CAMP Rehoboth Chorus—On the Road Again

June 14 & 15 at 7:00 p.m., June 16 at 3:00 p.m., Epworth United Methodist Church

The CAMP Rehoboth Chorus presents “On the Road Again,” a musical travelogue across America on Father’s Day weekend, June 14-16. Take a ride on “The City of New Orleans.” Or enjoy a scenic drive on “Route 66.” Or spend a leisurely day on a “Pontoon.”

Artistic Director Doug Yetter will be accompanied by David Zipse and the CAMP Chorus band. Tickets are $25 and can be purchased online.

Pride in the Courtyard

Thursday, June 20, 5:00-7:00 p.m., CAMP Rehoboth Courtyard

Celebrate Pride with CAMP Rehoboth at a social in the CAMP Rehoboth Courtyard and Elkins-Archibald Atrium.

Light refreshments will be provided.

Register online at camprehoboth.com.

Donations accepted.

Continued on page 41

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13 Letters

WOMEN’S FEST

BY NANCY SAKADUSKI

We Came and Played and Partied and Danced We had a fabulous four days celebrating women in the arts and humanities while having fun all around Rehoboth Beach.

This was an entire city effort.

-EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR KIM LEISEY

W

omen’s FEST 2024 was a success by any measure, with 4,000 women (cis, trans, non-binary) participating in CAMP Rehoboth’s Women’s FEST activities. Visitors came from as far away as Massachusetts, Mississippi, Florida, California, and Alaska. Event co-chairs Lisa Evans, Teri Seaton, Christa Marks, Michelle Manfredi, and Kim Smitas did a spectacular job of creating activities for all interests and keeping things running smoothly. Here are a few of the highlights: THE HEADLINERS It was no shock that Lea DeLaria was a bit outrageous, but it was a surprise that she brought along first-class jazz pianist Helen Sung. Helen nearly stole the show with her amazing jazz riffs and lightning-fast fingers.

Rehoboth resident Cindy Myers was delighted to see Crys Matthews. “I grew up listening to folk music,” she says. “[Crys Matthews] is taking the art form of folk music to a new level with her timely messages and fresh music. I was thrilled to meet her after the show and get a picture with her.”

THE PREMIER DANCE “The convention center was packed and energized,” said CAMP Board Vice Presi-

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“I love the openness of it. I love the energy of it.” dent Leslie Ledogar. “GirlsRoom was even more amazing this year, and DJ Peggy Castle kept the momentum up during band breaks with her skillful and thoughtful selection of just the right tunes. We are fortunate to have such great local talent to keep us on the dance floor. Special shout out to the bartenders and bar backs who never let anyone go thirsty!”

DRAG BRUNCH Anticipating the retro music, Rehoboth resident Lorraine Stanish wore her blue suede shoes, bell-bottom pedal pushers, and a collar that could be flipped up.

“What a fun show,” she said. “We (Lorraine and her wife, Beverly Miller) hadn’t laughed that hard in years.” They were glad they purchased their tickets early.

“Performers danced their buns off,” said Lorraine, who thought upstairs at The Pines was a great venue. “Such a loving and accepting environment. We’ll bring

our summer visitors here for a hoot of a time.”

THE SPEAKER SERIES Speaker Lynn Ames, author of Out at the Plate: The Dot Wilkinson Story, had been to FEST four times, but not for a few years, so she was astonished by the changes. “I love the new convention center first of all,” she said. “I love the openness of it. I love the energy of it. It’s a lot bigger than I remember it being, a lot going on, a lot more participants.

Top notch.” Her talk, which included personal anecdotes and video clips, illuminated a fascinating part of softball history.

THE EXPO The expo provided an opportunity not only to shop (jewelry! socks! chocolate!), but also to gain important information and find resources. Jacqueline Sterbach

WOMEN’S FEST “There’s got to be something for everybody now, between the sports and the speakers and the entertainment; they’re just doing a great job.” represented What Is Your Voice, Voices Against Domestic Violence. She chose to participate because “I always wanted to connect deeper in the LGBTQ+ community because I’m nonbinary myself…and I’m wanting to bring all of the communities together for a safe space where they know they can be cared for in a safe way to start their path to a recovery.” (24/7 helpline: 302-467-3310)

Save the date! The next Women's FEST will be April 10-13, 2025 THE SAPPHIC LITERARY POP-UP BOOKSTORE Authors signed their works and chatted with fans. “The books were flying off the tables, showing us just how much we need more LGBTQ+ books for sale here in Rehoboth,” observed local author and comedian Fay Jacobs. “The Pop-Up gals travel all over for events and we were so lucky to have them here.”

ACCESSIBILITY OUTREACH “I think that we’ve been available for the women who have come here,” said Graeme Davis, a Phoenix Accessibility volunteer, “showing that they can be attended to and given the right type of services for their particular challenges.”

Hope Vella, the group’s facilitator, added, “The people we provided services for have been happy because they’ve been included, and they are finding that there are going to be more inclusive social spaces for people with disabilities.”

Volunteer Barbara Clipper said, “I just take great joy in the fact that people are so ecstatic that

their needs are being met by us. They are always so happy—thanking you so much—that makes me happy.”

THE SPORTS “The sports activities were an amazing success,” reported Rina Pelligrini.

Despite the cold, all the groups finished the Evie Simmons Golf Tournament, organized by Barb Thompson and Dawn Dupre. It was cold again for Friday’s golf tournament, coordinated by Tama Viola and MaryJo Tarallo, but again everyone stuck it out. Players reported that the pickleball tournament run by Mary Rossettini also went well.

Rina oversaw the cornhole tournament, which went off on time and was completed within three hours. Thirty-two teams competed in the double elimination tournament. (For a more detailed FEST sports recap, visit page 78.)

BROADS ON THE BOARDS Volunteer Marianne Sheridan said, “[Broadwalk on the Boardwalk] was emotional, inspiring, and very well done. It truly was one of the best events I attended during Women’s FEST.” A highlight for

her was meeting Diane Bruce, who over the past 30 years has survived metastatic colon cancer, breast cancer, and squamous cell cancer of the eyelid. “She is truly a beacon of hope for all those struggling with cancer— her smile lights up her face and draws you to her.”

SUMMING IT UP Milton resident Judy Stout has been coming to Women’s FEST since about 2008. “It’s grown so much, and they offer so much more,” she said. “There’s got to be something for everybody now, between the sports and the speakers and the entertainment; they’re just doing a great job.”

“CAMP Rehoboth is grateful for our business partners, sponsors, and volunteers,” said Kim Leisey. “Over the four days we had over 4,000 people participate from all across the country, including Alaska! Our hotels and restaurants were full, and downtown was bustling. Thank you to everyone who helped to make this weekend a time of joy for so many.”

Save the date! The next Women’s FEST will be April 10-13, 2025. ▼

MAY 17, 2024

15 Letters

THANK YOU SPONSORS FOR MAKING WOMEN’S FEST 2024 A BIG SUCCESS SAVE NEXT YEAR’S DATES APRIL 10 - 13, 2025

2024

DIAMOND SPONSOR

SAPPHIRE SPONSORS

AMETHYST SPONSORS

RUBY SPONSORS

Wes Combs & Greg Albright | Susan Kutliroff & Barbara Snyder

Teri Agosta Atlantic Transportation Services Bayside Audiology & Hearing Aids Jill Brady Bryce Lingo & Shaun Tull Team Cape May Lewes Ferry Dottie Cirelli & Myrna Kelley Kenneth Currier & Mike Tyler Polly Donaldson Heroes for Hooters Holland Jewelers Jolly Trolley Christine Lay & Mari Blackburn Leslie Ledogar & Marilyn Hewitt Lewes Oyster House Joseph Maggio

Kim Mason & Sandra Humphrey Sherri McGee & Kris Aulenbach Nicola Pizza Ocean Downs Casino Donna Ohle & Susan Gaggiotti Sandy Oropel & Linda Frese Gwen Osborne & Katie Handy Kim Parks & Sharon Denny Joanne Picone & Kathy Bostedo Pirates of Lewes Schagrin Home Comfort Products Selkirk Sports Seniors Helping Seniors In-Home Services Sun Behavioral The INN at Canal Square

OPAL SPONSORS

EMERALD SPONSORS

JOE FILIPEK & LARRY RICHARDSON Summer Logo 1 “A”

JOE FILIPEK & LARRY RICHARDSON Summer Logo 1 “B”

Geri Diabiase & Deborah Knickerbocker Lisa Evans & Joan Gusdanovic Connie Fox & Donna Adair Judy & Carole Jesiolowski Nancy & Tora Kennedy

Lewis LeBrun & Michael Poniatowski Evelyn Maurmeyer In Memory of Natalie Moss Jennifer Rubenstein & Diane Scobey Teri Seaton & Joni Pegler

LEGACY SPONSOR

MEDIA SPONSOR

Anderson Carpet One Blue Hen Restaurant Pat Catanzariti & Carole Ramos Colors by Aletta County Bank Lewis Dawley-Becker & Greg Dawley-Becker Delaware Total Foot and Ankle Center DiFebo's Dreamweaver Interiors & Fabrics Engage Paddle Fisherman's Wharf Cruising & Fishing Center David Garrett & Marti Garrett Maryland Natural Health Center John Hackett & Tom Newton HealTree Healthy Outcomes Weight Loss Center Nancy Hewish & Vicki Martina Jack Lingo Realtor

Jigsaw Health Jocelyn Kaplan & Ida Lee Adams Lori's Ovey Café Christa Marks Joann Marvel Margaret Moore & Sheree Mixell Nectar Restaurant Never Neverland Kennel & Cattery Odysea...Destination Beach OneCall Services, Inc. Procino-Wells & Woodland, LLC Redner's Markets Rehoboth Beach Dental Stacey Row Seagreen Bicycle Kathy Solano Somewhere Resaturant Summit Community Bank Surf Bagels The MAX Challenge of Lewes Trauma Specialists of Delaware

EVENT VENUE SPONSORS

ANNUAL SPONSORS

On behalf of the entire team at CAMP Rehoboth, Thank You for sponsoring Women’s FEST 2024!

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37 Baltimore Avenue Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971 302-227-5620 camprehoboth.com

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17 Letters

GETTING TO KNOW YOU

BY BILL FUCHS

A Glimpse Behind the Scenes

M

embers and staff of CAMP Rehoboth Chorus have already spent hundreds of hours preparing for the second concert of the season, “On the Road Again.” The concert, at Epworth United Methodist Church, 19285 Holland Glade Road, Rehoboth Beach, will be on Fathers’ Day weekend, June 14 and 15 at 7:00 p.m., and June 16 at 3:00 p.m. The concert will feature a travelogue of songs from across America, from “New York, New York,” through a “Rocky Mountain High,” and meet-up with “California Girls” at the terminus of “Route 66.” Tickets are available at camprehoboth.com.

Bill Fuchs, a member of the Chorus’s Leadership Committee, talked with the people behind the scenes (or about the behind-the-scenes work of those up front) to see just what goes into making such an epic production….

Artistic Director Doug Yetter, with decades of experience as a composer, director, conductor, producer, arranger, and actor, has led the Chorus for 12 years.

BILL FUCHS: How do you come up with ideas and themes for a two-hour concert?

DOUG YETTER: I keep a notebook for concert themes and jot down songs that fit into that frame. My mind is crammed with ancient show tunes and obscure novelty songs! The internet has

David Zipse

become my go-to. No matter what the theme of the concert is, there’s always a “Top 100 Songs About…” I also like to check other choruses’ websites and see

what kinds of concerts they’re doing.

BF: After you choose a theme, how do you decide on the music and songs to include?

DY: I put a concert together the same way I write any show—find an opening number to welcome the audience into the journey, ensure that at least half the songs are recognizable to some degree, and end with a closer/encore that the audience will leave humming. Avoid two songs in a row with the same tempo and never follow a ballad with another ballad. There are songs that fit a theme but don’t work with a chorus. I can’t imagine using a Janis Joplin or Rod Stewart song because their specific voices are linked to the songs.

Collaborative artist and accompanist David Zipse has been the accompanist since the Chorus’s inception. Recently his compositions have been featured on CBS Sunday Night Football and the Disney Channel.

BF: You’ve accompanied the chorus for 14 seasons but have composed and performed music across a wide spectrum of genres and venues. What has led you to stick with this collaboration?

Continued on page 49

Know o t s g Thin My Mom: About ey,

rn d atto e r i t e e 1. R l Estat a e R T F Agent ice r Serv e m o t 2. Cus first! comes

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302.381.4871 donna.whiteside@penfedrealty.com A member of the franchise system of BHH Affiliates, LLC

Letters 18

MAY 17, 2024

MAY 17, 2024

19 Letters

CAMP REHOBOTH COMMUNITY CENTER • 2024-2028 STRATEGIC PLAN

PRIDE In Progress Embrace. Empower. Evolve.

F

or over 30 years, CAMP Rehoboth Community Center has served as an oasis and a voice for members of the LGBTQ+ community. In 2024, we find ourselves at an inflection point in our history as a community center—and for our nation as a whole.

“CAMP Rehoboth envisions communities in southern Delaware and beyond where all LGBTQ+ people thrive. That’s the vision. It’s lofty and it must be. We deserve to thrive!”

– EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR KIM LEISEY, PHD

OUR MISSION

CAMP Rehoboth is an LGBTQ+ community center determined to Create A More Positive (CAMP) environment that is inclusive of all sexual orientations and gender identities in southern Delaware and beyond. We seek to promote cooperation, understanding among all people, and well-being, as we continue our work to build a safer community with room for all.

OUR VISION

CAMP Rehoboth envisions communities in southern Delaware and beyond where all LGBTQ+ people thrive.

We believe that LGBTQ+ people who are thriving:

ARE WELL HAVE A VOICE FEEL SAFE LIVE AUTHENTICALLY KNOW THEY BELONG Letters 20

MAY 17, 2024

2024-2028 STRATEGIC PLAN • CAMP REHOBOTH COMMUNITY CENTER

Over the next five years, we will take pride in progress as we empower community members to embrace their authentic selves and evolve along with us.

OUR STRATEGIC PLAN SETS FOUR PRIORITY GOALS: MAXIMIZE THE IMPACT OF OUR PROGRAMS CAMP Rehoboth ensures its programs meet the ever-changing needs of the diverse LGBTQ+ community in southern Delaware and beyond, to help foster a community where all its members are safe, strong, and healthy.

BUILD A DIVERSIFIED AND SUSTAINABLE FUNDING PLAN CAMP Rehoboth is building a diversified and sustainable financial infrastructure to support the focused execution of its programming.

INCREASE AND BROADEN COMMUNITY ENGAGEMENT CAMP Rehoboth is increasing its engagement in southern Delaware, expanding its programs and services beyond the beach-front communities. We are assuring our services align with the greatest needs within the LGBTQ+ community, leveraging partnerships and building coalitions.

STRENGTHEN BOARD GOVERNANCE AND STAFF LEADERSHIP CAMP Rehoboth ensures that its Board is governed—and CAMP Rehoboth’s staff are led—in accordance with current best practice standards for nonprofit organizations.

Visit camprehoboth.org/prideinprogress to learn more about CAMP Rehoboth Community Center, follow us as we implement our Strategic Plan, and work with us as we continue to Create A More Positive Rehoboth (and beyond).

CAMP Rehoboth was selected in 2023 as a participant in the Delaware Alliance for Nonprofit Advancement’s (DANA) Accelerator program. Over two years, we will work with DANA on program design, development, and evaluation; financial practices and sustainability; community networking and collaborations; and organizational governance and management.

MAY 17, 2024

21 Letters

The Writing Life

BY DANIELLE ARIANO

Writing the “Me” into Me-moir

T

he process of writing my memoir, The Requirement of Grief, was a herculean task for a myriad of reasons. These ranged from the text’s difficult and highly personal subject matter, to wrestling with whether I had a right to tell the story, to finding a publisher. But one of the more surprising challenges came as I worked through the developmental edits of my memoir. The biggest overarching critique that had come from my editor, Tammy, was that she felt like I was missing from the story. Minor problem, right? Me, missing from my very own “me”moir. .

In one sense this feedback was surprising. I’d written over 250 pages about processing the grief that came in the wake of my older sister Alexis’s suicide. I felt that I’d bared my soul. Yet, the moment the words came from her lips, I knew that she was right.

Tammy said that she knew who I was in relationship to my grief, but she wanted to know what else was there? She used much nicer, gentler language, but what it boiled down to was that I’d written a story where the main character, me, was one dimensional and flat.

In fiction, one of the hallmarks of good writing is to have well developed characters. This means that the reader should feel like they understand their motivations, their desires, their moral compass or lack thereof, their sense of humor—basically, their essence. As a reader, you don’t have to like a character to go along on a journey with them, but you definitely need to understand them.

The same holds true for memoir, but I’d made the classic memoirist mistake: I’d failed to analyze myself as a character while I was writing.

This is hands down the weirdest thing about writing a memoir. You have to be yourself and be a character at the same time. As such, you have to think about how an audience will receive the “you” that has morphed into a character. You have to hold your real self in one hand and remain true to that self, while simulLetters 22

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taneously holding the character self in the other hand and considering how the audience will relate to the character self.

Ultimately, if the audience doesn’t feel connected to the character self, they probably won’t finish reading your book.

And your writer self will feel very disappointed if that happens.

This is hands down the weirdest thing about writing a memoir. You have to be yourself and be a character at the same time.

Like I said, weird.

This strange paradox shares a loose parallel with signing up to be on reality TV. Of course, I’ve never been on reality TV, but, ashamedly, I am a dogged watcher of shows like Bravo’s Below Deck, which follows a crew working on a luxury yacht chartered by the ultra-rich, and MTV’s perversely juvenile The Challenge, a competition show that pits castmates against one another.

As a seasoned viewer, I know that the moment a person signs up to be on one of these shows, they forfeit a little piece of their humanity, at least in the eyes of the audience, because even though they’re real human beings they become charac-

ters on a television show. They get edited to appear certain ways, their words are taken out of context, they are manipulated by producers and assigned storylines, not to mention the fact that reality TV stars have evolved to become more performative over the years. All this to say that it’s real, but not at all real. The viewer relates to the characters as some type of hybrid being. We know they’re real humans, but it’s hard to hold them as such.

After my call with my editor, I went back and looked for ways to allow my readers to know me outside of my grief.

As I struggled with this, I came to understand that a big part of me believed that I was only interesting in relation to my grief. It was difficult to let go of that notion and actually let the reader know who I was, and what my life was like, but I got to work writing whole chapters where the grief was present, but not the main character.

The reader learned that I worked in a cabinet shop, building and finishing cabinets, that I was a wife on the cusp of becoming a mom, and that I was a friend struggling to know how to handle a friend’s infidelity. In other words, I was messy and complicated and fully human.

It turned out that Tammy’s observations were spot on. The more I showed of myself outside of my grief, the more three-dimensional and real my character became. With great effort, I wrote “me” into my memoir. ▼ Danielle Ariano’s memoir is available locally at Browseabout Books and online at amazon.com.

Danielle Ariano is a former columnist for Baltimore Gay Life; her work has been widely published. Ariano lives in Maryland with her wife, son, and dog. Visit her website at danielleariano.com.

MAY 17, 2024

23 Letters

health+wellness

BY SHARON MORGAN

Many Roads Lead to Health

M

Absence of Evidence does not mean Evidence of Absence –CARL SAGAN y first introduction into health practices outside of Western medicine occurred with my grandmother.

A hard-working, single mother of six, she was plagued with arthritic conditions from early adulthood.

She was being seen by her primary care practitioner, unable to raise her left arm above a 90-degree plane from her body.

A naturally suspicious woman, she nevertheless allowed herself to be given an acupuncture treatment. The quiet, visiting Asian practitioner allayed one fear after another, calmly explaining to us the philosophy and every aspect of the treatment. When completed, my grandmother was amazed with her shoulder joint’s full range of motion, promptly launching into various jigs and Mummers’ struts, twirling around a confused, but beguiled, Asian doctor.

The history of the use of complementary and alternative medicine (CAM) is really the story of ancient practices coming full circle. Prior to the current conventional or Western medical model beginning in the 19th century, individuals for centuries would turn to traditional healers and ancient home remedies to address their health needs. However, as conventional medicine continued to mold clinical practice based on research, CAM practices became marginalized.

Bear in mind, “conventional” medicine is in relation to the practices and norms of a specific culture or region. For example, Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) here in the US is considered “unconventional,” whereas TCM is widely accepted and practiced by many cultures as a conventional modality for healing.

What is currently taught here in US medical (and other healthrelated) schools is considered the basis of conventional medicine.

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Starting in the 1960s, however, more individuals were dissatisfied with the conventional medical model, describing interactions with medical personnel as depersonalized and disempowering.

In a 20-year study, the National Institutes of Health (NIH) evaluated changes

The history of the use of complementary and alternative medicine (CAM) is really the story of ancient practices coming full circle. in the use of seven complementary health approaches, including chiropractic care, acupuncture, yoga, meditation, massage therapy, naturopathy, and guided imagery. Over that period, up to 37 percent of individuals reported using at least one of the seven modalities, up from 19 percent at the beginning of the study. Yoga, meditation, and massage therapy experienced the most significant growth over the 20-year study period. Additionally, close to 50 percent of participants reported using complemen-

tary approaches for pain management.

As previously mentioned, TCM has been widely practiced for centuries throughout many cultures and includes dietary therapy, herbs, and mind/ body practices such as tai chi and acupuncture. Tai chi has been described as meditation in motion, and participants go through a variety of slow motion, low impact exercises. According to Harvard University Public Health researchers, evidence suggests tai chi helps maintain strength, balance, and flexibility.

Acupuncture, on the other hand, is a nonpharmacological, adjuvant treatment option that utilizes fine needles or pressure points to keep the body’s vital energy aligned. As more studies verify its efficacy, the practice is increasingly being covered by health insurance plans.

Originating in India over 3,000 years ago, Ayurvedic medicine combines plant, animal, metal, or mineral products with diet, exercise, and lifestyle modifications to maintain optimal health.

Few research studies exist thus far supporting therapeutic claims; however, some studies suggest certain herbal compounds are as effective as their pharmacologic equivalents in treating both arthritic and rheumatoid pain. In addition, outcomes from some small clinical trials suggest certain Ayurvedic formulations may help manage Type II diabetes.

It is not surprising that many ancient herbal formulations are proven efficacious in clinical studies. All ancient cultures have documented tomes of botanicals and their uses. The US Forest Service estimates up to 40 percent of current pharmaceuticals used in Western medicine have their roots in ancient pharmacopeias, including the 20 topprescribed medicines in the US. The European Directorate for the Quality of Medicines & HealthCare has a wellestablished formulary for the efficacy, preparation, use, and warning indications for thousands of plants and herbs.

Native American cultures throughout the Americas and Pacific Islands believe the person is ultimately responsible

health+wellness

for one’s own health, and the healer is only the facilitator to help people heal themselves. Healing includes not only the individual, but the family, community, and even future generations. Ceremony is a key part to Native cultures’ healing practices, as the body and spirit are interconnected and must heal together.

Like other cultures, Native Americans use a variety of plants not only medicinally, but as an integral part of a healthy diet.

Homeopathy was developed in Germany during the mid-19th century.

Two theories frame homeopathic philosophy: 1) “like vs like” or a disease can be cured by a substance that produces similar symptoms in healthy people; and 2) “law of minimum dose” or the lower the dose of the medication, the greater its effectiveness.

In some ways, these theories sound

strikingly similar to how vaccines were developed. The marked difference is that homeopathic remedies thus far have failed to produce any immune

...evidence-based CAM offers diverse alternatives to maximize one’s health. responses, which is the critical, proven reason for vaccines. Regardless, homeopathy is used routinely throughout many industrialized countries. Since the mid-2010s both the Federal Trade Commission and the Food and Drug Administration have taken concrete steps to ensure homeopathic products at least will do no harm.

The recent COVID pandemic has changed how Americans view their physical and mental health. According to McKinsey & Company surveys, consumers seek a more comprehensive, holistic approach to how they receive care. This includes incorporating clear, transparent language in healthcare discussions, as well as addressing unmet social needs affecting health.

Insurers are taking notice and changing their practices to provide a more seamless, individualized healthcare experience. As such, evidence-based CAM offers diverse alternatives to maximize one’s health. ▼ Sharon A. Morgan is a retired advanced practice nurse with over 30 years of clinical and healthcare policy background.

CAM Options at CAMP Rehoboth

M

aybe some of those complimentary and alternative practices sound good to you? Or, maybe you already pursue some of them, but are always looking for more options? CAMP Rehoboth can help!

(And we even thought about the traffic/ parking challenges arriving with “the season”—i.e., online, anyone? Or beat the meter timing?) Except where otherwise noted, visit camprehoboth.com/health for more information or to register.

• Yoga over 50: ONLINE with Sue McCarthy Mondays-Sundays, 8:30 a.m.

(EXCEPT Thursday, 9:00 a.m.)

We have lots of choices for yoga:

• Morning Mindfulness: Tuesdays, 9:00 a.m., ONLINE with Erin Shivone

• Men’s Yoga: Saturdays, 8:45 a.m., inperson (drop-in) at CAMP Rehoboth, with Tim Rennick • Chair Yoga: Tuesdays, 9:00 a.m., ONLINE with Erin Shivone

Mondays-Wednesdays-Fridays, 4:00 p.m.

Maybe tai chi sounds good? We have that, too: • Tai Chi: Tuesdays, 8:30 a.m., in-person at CAMP Rehoboth, with Marianne Walch Something related to meditation? Try:

And, periodically, CAMP Rehoboth hosts a class focusing on strength, coordination, and mobility—all critical factors in maintaining one’s balance:

• Matter of Balance: email Danielle.

Briggs@delaware.gov to be wait-listed for the next class. ▼

Youth Crisis Support: Crisis intervention services for children under 18. Parents and caregivers are connected to a crisis clinician. Available 24/7. Call 800-9694357 or text DE to 741-741.

988: Free, confidential support and resources for anyone in distress.

Available 24/7. Call 988.

Delaware Hope Line: Free coaching and support. Links to mental health, addiction, and crisis services. Available 24/7. Call 833-9-HOPEDE (833-946-7333).

LET’S STAY CONNECTED! All of CAMP Rehoboth’s programs, services, and events are listed here: camprehoboth.com/community-calendar.

Please visit the site often to ensure you have up-to-date information on what is being offered—and when. ▼ MAY 17, 2024

25 Letters

CommunityNews

Those Who Led the Way

I

n honor of Pride Month, the Rehoboth Beach Historical Society and Museum will present “Those Who Led the Way” on Thursday, June 6, 2024, at 5:00 p.m. The event features Murray Archibald, Fay Jacobs, and Mark Purpura, and promises to be an evening of history, humor, and activism.

To be featured on Rick Yarborough’s upcoming NBC Washington’s Pride Special, “Those Who Led the Way” will be a roundtable discussion with three of the city’s and state’s LGBTQ+ leaders: Murray Archibald, co-founder of CAMP Rehoboth and director of the museum’s board; Fay Jacobs, author, humorist, and activist; and Mark Purpura, Esquire, President of the Equality Delaware Foundation and civil rights advocate.

About the speakers:

In 1991, artist and Rehoboth Beach Museum trustee, Murray Archibald, cofounded CAMP Rehoboth with his late husband, Steve Elkins. There, he wore many hats, serving as President of the board of directors, executive director, creative director, and editor-in-chief of Letters from CAMP Rehoboth.

Native New Yorker Fay Jacobs had a career in journalism, theater, and public relations in Washington, DC, before settling in Rehoboth. A former board member of CAMP Rehoboth, Ms. Jacobs writes a column for the organization’s publication, Letters. She is known nationally as an author with Bywater Books, a humorist, storyteller, and performer.

Attorney Mark Purpura has successfully worked to protect transgender Delawareans from discrimination and has advocated for LGBTQ+ civil rights in Delaware for over a decade. His efforts include co-leading the advocacy and educational campaigns for Delaware’s civil union, marriage equality, and gender identity nondiscrimination acts. He is the President of Equality Delaware Foundation, sits on the board of Equality Delaware Inc., and is a former member of the board of CAMP Rehoboth.

This event will be held in the John N. & Jean K. Papajohn Lecture Hall at the Rehoboth Beach Museum, 511 Rehoboth Avenue, Rehoboth Beach, Delaware. Seating is limited so reserve your spot early Letters 26

MAY 17, 2024

at rbmuseum.org. Tickets are free for members and $10 for future members. Since this event is expected to sell out it will be live streamed through a link on the museum’s website. Contact 302-227-7310 or programs@rbmuseum.org with questions about the program.

The Rehoboth Beach Museum, operated by the Rehoboth Beach Historical Society, is a nonprofit organization dedicated to preserving and showcasing for the public the history, culture, architecture, and unique character of Rehoboth Beach.

2024 PRIDE Film Festival

The Rehoboth Beach Film Society (RBFS), in partnership with CAMP Rehoboth, will present its PRIDE Film Festival June 14-18, 2024, at the Cinema Art Theatre, Lewes. The four-day festival will showcase LGBTQ+ documentaries, features, and international films.

Headlining this year’s Festival is a 25-year retrospective of screening director Jim Fall’s classic film, Trick. Fall will attend the Saturday evening screening of the film—an evening that will include a 1990s-style party.

The full Festival program includes nine titles selected by the planning committee; titles (in addition to Trick) are: Copa 71, Cora Bora, Close to You, Chuck Chuck Baby, Hidden Master: The Legacy of George Platt Lynes, A House Is Not a Disco, National Anthem, and Summer Qamp.

Festival admission per film is $12 for the general public, $9 for RBFS members, and $5 for students.

Tickets may be purchased online at rehobothfilm. com or by visiting/calling the box office during business hours (Wednesday through Sunday, noon to 5:00 p.m.). Tickets are non-refundable and cannot be exchanged.

Lewes Public Library: Beach Reads Sale Friday, May 31, 3:00-5:00 p.m.

Saturday, June 1, 8:00 a.m.-2:00 p.m.

Just in time for the summer beach season, the Friends of the Lewes Public Library is hosting a “Beach Reads” used book sale. The sale features over 3,000 titles of popular fiction, all discounted to half-off internet pricing. Browse the large assortment of adult fiction, mysteries, sci-fi/fantasy titles, books for young children, and audiobooks—perfect accompaniments for a day spent lounging on the sand!

All proceeds benefit the Lewes Public Library. ▼ Pictured, top to bottom: Murray Archibald, Fay Jacobs, Mark Purpura

Community Lutheran Church

Revitalize your faith journey with special guest speaker Colby Martin!

Author of UnClobber: Rethinking Our Misuse of the Bible on Homosexuality

Join us live

TIME & DATE

8:45 a.m. and 10:30 a.m., June 9 1 p.m. – Open Discussion Discussion will be live streamed WHERE

Community Lutheran Church 30897 Omar Rd, Frankford, DE 19945

Revitalize your faith journey with Pastor Colby Martin a leading voice in the progressive Christian movement. Embrace love and grace for all.

Delve into topics from Colby’s acclaimed books: UnClobber: Rethinking Our Misuse of the Bible on Homosexuality and The SHIFT: A Survival Guide for Becoming a Progressive Christian. bridgebuilder.church

MAY 17, 2024

27 Letters

Out & About

BY ERIC C. PETERSON

The Bear Truth

I

t started, as these things often do, on TikTok. I’m not a TikTok user myself, but I do spend way too much time on Facebook. Also, ever since I deleted my Twitter account (yes, it was still Twitter when I did it and I therefore refuse to say “X”—it just feels silly to me…because “Twitter” sounds so grown-up? Anyway, I digress.), I’ve been spending a lot of time on Threads, which is Mark Zuckerberg’s answer to Twitter—not perfect, but preferable to the right-wing hellscape that Elon Musk has wrought in his little corner of the internet.

The other day, a new account appeared on my Threads timeline. It called itself @the.bear.in.the.woods, and amassed around 4,000 followers in its first three days. And if you don’t know why, you probably spend a lot less time on Beyoncé’s internet than I do.

Like I said, the whole thing started on TikTok. A user who goes by @ screenshothq posted a short video (as TikTok users are wont to do) wherein seven women on the street were asked the question, “If you were alone in the woods, who would you rather encounter: a strange man you’ve never met before, or a bear?” If you’re a woman reading this, you likely won’t be shocked to learn that of the seven women, six of them chose “bear.” Only one would take their chances with a man they know nothing about.

If you’re a man, you might be shocked. You might immediately understand. You might be sad. You might be feeling a little defensive, as though you’re being attacked. It’s hard to predict how a man will react, and really—that’s the entire point.

The original video on TikTok quickly amassed over 65,000 responses.

In the meantime, the “man vs. bear” discourse has completely taken over Threads, mostly because some of the men there have become completely unhinged by this conversation. They Letters 28

MAY 17, 2024

insist that a woman would be much better off meeting a strange man in the woods, and to prove their assertion, they usually talk about what a good, upstanding, moral person they are, personally and individually. When their arguments fail to convince any woman they encounter in the forest we call social media, they tend to lash out, and generally prove the point the women were making all along.

“If you were alone in the woods, who would you rather encounter: a strange man you’ve never met before, or a bear?”

Obviously, no one gets to choose who one randomly encounters when alone in the woods. But it’s worth stating that first of all, the women are absolutely correct. Most bears in the US, unless they feel threatened or are really hungry, will not kill someone they randomly meet in the woods. According to bearvault.com, there have only been about 180 fatal bear attacks in North America since 1784.

Now, compare that to the amount of harassment, abuse, assault, rape, and yes—death—that women have experienced at the hands of men during that same time. Many of the women I follow on Threads have started posting things like, “A bear has never ordered me to sleep n*ked so he could have ‘constant access’” and “A bear has never tried to convince me that I can control my menstrual cycle,” and “A bear has never told me that stalking is ‘lowkey romantic.’”

In a few heartbreaking posts, many, many women have noted that in the event of a bear attack, they would probably a) be believed and b) would

not be prosecuted for what they wore, if they smiled, or did anything else to “lead the bear on.”

And still, the men can’t or refuse to get it. If they would only listen, there’s a lot that straight men especially could learn from this. They could learn, for instance, that women fear men, and with good reason. They could learn their catcalls on the street are not funny, they’re scary. Their invasion of a woman’s personal space is not alluring, it’s scary. Sending a photo of your junk to a woman you barely know is not sexy.

It’s scary. And if they’d really like to take these lessons to heart, they could take time to counsel other men, young boys especially, on how women feel and how they could behave in a way that supports them rather than demeans them.

As I write this, the conversation is predictably expanding to explore other identities. Many gay men have posted that they’d also choose a bear, and have clarified that they mean an actual bear, not a bearded man with a hairy dad bod. Several Black women have gone on record to state they’d also choose a bear over a strange White woman they didn’t know. And, because the topic is a heavy one, there are also many moments of levity, up to and including the entrance of @the.bear.in.the.woods.

Welcome to the jungle, Mama Grizzly.

It’s wild in here. ▼ Eric Peterson is Interim Managing Editor of Amble Press, a novelist (Loyalty, Love & Vermouth), and a diversity, equity, and inclusion practitioner. Follow Eric on Threads at @ red7eric.

MAY 17, 2024

29 Letters

labor day weekend august 31 - September 1, 2024 rehoboth convention center a benefit to support camp rehoboth

Letters 30 MAY 17, 2024

Saturday, august 31 A night of comedy HEADLINER

Joe Dombrowski Since Joe’s rise to fame, he has been traveling the globe with his stand-up comedy which often highlights his outrageous, g-g-g-g-GAY family dynamics and of course his time as a former school teacher.

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31 Letters

It’s My Life

BY MICHAEL THOMAS FORD

For Whom the Bel-tane Tolls

T

wo years ago, on Beltane, Steve and I were legally married. The mayor of our village performed the ceremony, wearing a papier-mâché raccoon head. We hadn’t picked out rings yet, so we exchanged ceramic tiles painted by a local artist (they happened to be sitting on the coffee table). Then we walked down the street to the one restaurant in town and had breakfast with our neighbors.

I never thought I would get married. I never really wanted to get married. Not in a state-sanctioned way, anyway. It’s always felt like an outdated custom to me, one that’s been used to keep people, particularly women, tethered to one another in ways that are difficult to get out of. But for other legal reasons, getting married made sense for us. Plus, being united in matrimony by a man in a raccoon head is not something you get to do every day.

Unless you live in our village, of course.

When Beltane came around this year, marking the beginning of summer by sending the temperatures soaring into the 80s, I celebrated our anniversary by mowing the lawn. As I pushed the mower around the back yard, I thought about our wedding. Then I thought back to another wedding.

In January of 1978, when I was nine, my sister got married. I was one of the groomsmen. A few days before the wedding, all the men in the wedding party were sent to be fitted for our outfits. I was assigned a dressing room with one of my soon-to-be-brother-in-law’s college roommates. His name was Carl, and he was a bear, although of course I didn’t have a word for that then.

I didn’t have a word for a lot of things.

Like the way I felt when Carl stripped down to his underpants and his big, hairy belly was inches away from me. Or what it meant when he helped me tie my bowtie and I suddenly imagined that it was my wedding I was getting dressed for, and that Carl was the person I was marrying.

“When did you know?” is a question queer people are often asked. That moLetters 32 MAY 17, 2024

ment in a wedding attire store dressing room is my first clear memory of understanding that what I wanted was not what most little boys wanted, or at least what society told me most little boys wanted.

I don’t remember thinking that I couldn’t get married. At nine, everything seemed a possibility. Soon enough I

Now, Beltane…symbolizes the start of a bright, glowing season of love. would learn that boys who wanted to marry boys were seen as something peculiar, or worse. I would learn that there were rules, and that breaking them came with consequences. But in 1978, a day after seeing Carl in his underpants in a dressing room, I stood beside him in matching tuxedos, watching my sister get married, and I pretended that it was me and Carl exchanging rings and saying, “I do.”

It would be a long time before I got to say “I do” to Steve. By then I’d had a decade-long relationship that ended. I’d watched my parents divorce and remarry new partners. I’d seen a lot of friends— queer and otherwise—get married, some of those marriages lasting and some not.

A few months before Steve and I married,

my sister celebrated her 44th anniversary.

When she posted photos of her wedding day on social media, there I was with Carl, and I wondered what he would have thought if he’d known the boy he shared a changing room with wanted to marry him.

Full marriage equality arrived in the United States in 2015. Were my sister’s wedding to occur now, nine-year-old me could indeed imagine a day when he might legally marry Carl. While queer kids still face any number of challenges, they at least get to imagine marrying a partner of their choice. While I’m still not wild about the need many of us have for the legal protections only available to us via state-sanctioned unions, I do love that a boy discovering that thinking about marrying a bear makes him feel happy doesn’t have that feeling shattered by being told he can never do that.

I admit that I’m still not entirely used to having a husband. Every time I refer to Steve that way—and I do it frequently, often in insurance-related situations, because I’m on his medical plan—part of me waits for a negative reaction: an eye roll, a sigh, maybe even an outright comment that I must be mistaken because two men cannot be married. I know this is a relic from the time in which I grew up, and it bothers me that I even think about it. But even here in rural, not-always-progressive Ohio, it has yet to happen.

The world changes. Slowly, usually. Or in fits and starts. Right now, it sometimes feels like it’s moving backwards. But some things do change for the better. Now, Beltane doesn’t just symbolize the beginning of summer for me; it symbolizes the start of a bright, glowing season of love. Maybe next year I’ll see if Carl is still around and invite him to our celebration. ▼ Michael Thomas Ford is a much-published Lambda Literary award-winning author. Visit Michael at michaelthomasford.com.

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33 Letters

Words Matter

BY CLARENCE FLUKER

Things My Mom Taught Me

B

From Home to Office

efore any internship or first job, we begin to learn—at home—how to show up in our school and work careers. I’m thankful for the strong example and influence of my first teacher, my mom. Earlier this month we honored Mother’s Day and in recognition of my mom, I want to share five of the many lessons I’ve learned from her that have influenced my career. I hope you’ll find something to take away too.

Keep going. My mom started her journey to a four-year college degree when I was very young. It wasn’t easy raising three kids on her own, working full-time, and taking classes. There would be many stops and starts but it was a goal she was determined to achieve.

My junior year of high school she graduated with her bachelor’s degree. A few years later, in 2002, I earned my graduate degree and the following week, I attended her commencement for her masters in nonprofit management. She kept going and inspired me to do the same.

Just because everyone at the table doesn’t look like you, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t also be at that table. My older brother wanted to participate in the Boy Scouts. There wasn’t someone willing to step up to lead a troop in our neighborhood, so my mom did. In the early-/mid1980’s it wasn’t very common in our part of Ohio to find a Black woman—or any woman—leading a Boy Scout troop. But that didn’t matter to her. She was dedicated to providing a space and opportunity for boys to learn, grow, and be their best. She went on to lead the troop for several years and held an area position.

Plan. Prepare. Implement. For school projects, church programs, and even family vacations, my mom always had a written plan, checklists, and organized folders. I saw firsthand how important it was to plan something out and make sure that I was prepared with the tools and materials needed for things to go as smoothly as possible.

In December, someone asked how my mom was able to bake and share 20 boxes of holiday cookies accompanied with personal notes. It was an easy question to answer: she had written out a plan, a checklist, decided which days she’d do specific

She saw a need and filled it. She had a vision and created it.

Letters 34 MAY 17, 2024

tasks, and put together a spreadsheet of recipients and organized them in categories, so she’d know when to have which boxes ready for pick up or shipping. Everyone loved the cookies.

You can make friends at work. Of course, not everyone at your job is going to be your friend.

Indeed, it is important to have boundaries. And yes, the focus of work is work. However, along the way it is okay to build real human relationships with the people you spend so much time with. My mom met one of her best friends at work almost 40 years ago. They’ve remained close friends through many jobs and personal and professional ups and downs.

She’s practically an aunt to me. Several of my mom’s colleagues she became particularly close with over the years were lesbian and gay folks, who have been role models to me, great friends with her, and offered opportunities for learning.

Some of my closest friends are people I’ve worked with throughout my career, and I consider that a workplace benefit that keeps on giving.

Create it yourself. One year I was flipping through the proposed Black History Month youth program for church. Never one to hold my opinions back, I told my mom I didn’t like it. She told me to come up with an alternative. The next day I spent hours in my room writing a script, and later presented it to her. She took it to the committee at church and they voted to use it. That year the young people at church performed my vignette.

If you have a vision for something, you can make it happen. My mom has created many things from scratch over the years. My favorite is her annual ‘Celebrating Women from Crayons to Lipstick’ brunch that brings together 100+ women from northeast Ohio. It provides a space for girls and women to fellowship in faith and uplift each other.

I’m so proud of how she continues to nurture that event. She saw a need and filled it. She had a vision and created it.

My mom is a boss and I’m grateful for all she’s taught me. ▼ Clarence J. Fluker is a public affairs and social impact strategist. Since 2008, he’s also been a contributing writer for Swerv, a lifestyle periodical celebrating African American LGBTQ+ culture and community. Follow him on Instagram: @Mr_CJFluker.

MAY 17, 2024

35 Letters

READ ALL ABOUT IT!

BY STEPHEN RASKAUSKAS

Queering Rehoboth Beach

F

or decades, Rehoboth Beach has been a destination for LGBTQ+ visitors, transplants, and natives to seek a safe space to enjoy Delaware’s beautiful coastline. But how exactly did Rehoboth become so queer?

That question inspired historian and author James T. Sears’s latest book, Queering Rehoboth Beach: Beyond the Boardwalk. Hitting shelves just in time to grab a copy to read with your toes in the sand, Queering Rehoboth is the first book-length study on the topic.

Explaining his title (for those unfamiliar with “queer” as a verb), Queering Rehoboth, Sears says that it references not only multiple communities co-existing to create the Rehoboth we know today, but also his methodology as a historian. “One of my favorite ways of thinking about the nature of queerness,” he said, “is that it’s not simply a same-sex attraction; it’s a way of looking at the world.”

The book ties together archival research as well as personal narratives from Sears’s interviews with important players in making Rehoboth what it is today.

“What I’m interested in, as a writer, is trying to capture people’s voices—knowing that they might not always be in sync,” he said. “And capturing the complexity—and the complexity of change—in a small town. You can do that only through narrative history.”

Exploring Rehoboth’s 19th century beginnings, he establishes a dichotomy between two of the town’s early founders, William Bright, a state magnate in northern Delaware, and the Reverend J.P. Quigg, the leading Methodist minister in southern Delaware.

“Quigg represented the Methodist true believers and the believers in the theological sense of discipline. And along with that group were another group of people who were homeowners—not all of them, but many of them,” Sears explained.

“And on the other side, Bright, who actually had a hotel right on the beach.

Bright really came to represent the individuals who were the entrepreneurial Letters 36 MAY 17, 2024

class; the commercial people who were trying to set up businesses.”

This tension between conservative and progressive groups that existed when Rehoboth was founded may, Sears suggests, even persist today. With this framework in mind, he presents charming anecdotes and surprising facts that tell the queer history of the town up through the early 2000s.

While queer people have always been a part of Rehoboth’s history… the town became a true destination for queer people…in the 80s and 90s.

When possible, Sears also draws upon histories of other marginalized groups, such as Black and African American residents. Prejudice against some communities went so far as to exclude them from owning property in Rehoboth.

“Covenants—and the covenants actually wouldn’t even change until the 70s—were quite clear that developers were only going to sell to people who were Christian white people. So, no Jews, no African Americans, no people of color, etc.”

By weaving many stories together, “that’s the queering of Rehoboth, looking at the town and the people that contributed to the town in a slightly different way than a standard history of Rehoboth.” The book follows a few main voices that carry the narrative, with many others joining in chorus.

While Sears said, “we don’t play favorites,” one of the many personal histories he collected in his research that he found especially compelling most was that of Ivo Dominguez Jr., a queer refugee who escaped Fidel Castro’s Cuba and eventually settled in Delaware.

Queering Rehoboth includes information and anecdotes from over 10 hours of interviews with Glen Thompson, who

in 1980 opened the Renegade Disco & Lounge west of Rehoboth. It was the first openly owned gay bar in Delaware.

According to Sears, his interview with Thompson is the only one ever published.

Sears adds, even if readers “think they know these folks I’ve interviewed, I guarantee that you will learn a lot of interesting things few others know!”

Of course, not only people have influenced Rehoboth’s history. The book also explores natural disasters that shaped the community at large, such as historically significant floods and fires that devastated the boardwalk, and important hubs in the queer community, such as the Pink Pony bar.

While queer people have always been a part of Rehoboth’s history (even in pre-Columbian times), the town became a true destination for queer people with the opening of more restaurants, cafes, bars, and clubs in the 80s and 90s.

In this era, of course, is the birth of CAMP Rehoboth. Sears said, “CAMP Rehoboth certainly contributed—way beyond what would typically be expected of a community organization—to the development of the queer community here.” ▼ CAMP Rehoboth will host a Book Launch Event for Queering Rehoboth Beach on June 2, at 4:00 p.m.

“It’s important to understand our past so that we can know how to chart our future,” said CAMP Rehoboth Executive Director Kim Leisey.

Stephen Raskauskas is a Sussex County native who has produced content for radio, TV, digital, and print.

MAY 17, 2024

37 Letters

OUTlook

BY BETH SHOCKLEY

Pink Sunsets

I

s there anything better than the opening of beach season? Maybe a few things—winning the lottery or maybe a free trip to Hawaii.

But few wonderful things compare with putting your toes in the chilly Atlantic Ocean on that first warm day of the season. It’s time for beach chairs and sunscreen, sticky sand, sunrises, Thrashers, finding the perfect spot for your umbrella, walking the Boardwalk, and so much more.

I’ve always loved the beach. My happiest childhood memories center around the trips my family took to Ocean City, Maryland, since we lived in Salisbury, Maryland. We rented a cottage every July for two weeks near 34th street and later, a place at Castle in the Sand.

It was heaven for me—spending all day swimming in the ocean, sandwich lunches from the cooler my mother packed that morning, quick showers, and then off to the Boardwalk where Mom would drop me and my brothers at the inlet and pick us up many hours later. A different era. The freedom was whole and as intoxicating as the Wild Mouse rollercoaster, tearing through a million games of Skeeball at Marty’s Playland, and that DJ guy at the Matterhorn teasing over Aerosmith, “Do You Wanna Go Reeeeeeaal Fast?”

When I was growing up in the 1960s and 70s, I knew of Rehoboth Beach, but I never went there. I had no idea it was a place where gay people were. Had I known about Rehoboth’s gay population, would coming out have been easier, or self-acceptance occurred more quickly? Hard to know.

Probably.

No, my first visit to Rehoboth didn’t come until 1988, when I lived and worked on Capitol Hill. I was a Senate communications staffer and had fallen in love with an artist named Jane. She had been living in DC for a decade and knew all about Rehoboth. I still remember the first time we visited. I was absolutely charmed by the city and its vibe.

Letters 38 MAY 17, 2024

It’s a cliché, but going through the little roundabout on Rehoboth Avenue felt like returning to a best friend.

Pink sunsets reminded us of the islands we had visited in the Caribbean, and we spent long, languorous days newly in love, walking around seeing gay men and lesbians holding hands on the Boardwalk, playing the horses game, and slathering sunscreen on after long swims in the ocean. Jane and I spent many long summer weekends enjoying Rehoboth.

I have so many happy memories of Rehoboth—newer ones created with my wife, Sandy. I had been 13 years away in January of 2006, when I returned to Rehoboth; it was one of the first places Sandy and I went when I moved to Delaware to settle down with her. It’s a cliché, but going through the little roundabout on Rehoboth Avenue felt like returning to a best friend.

And it’s how I feel when beach season opens every year. I get as excited to get to Five Points on Route 1 as I used to when we’d reach the Coppertone billboard on Route 50 when I was a child. “We’re alllllllmost there!

Woo-hoo!”

Yes, the traffic is ridiculous. It always has been. Probably always will be. I try to be like my Dad behind the wheel and not sweat it. We do have to travel a bit, from Dover, which is where our jobs are. One regret—not buying a place in Rehoboth in the 80s, lol.

I had to miss Women’s FEST this year because we went to visit Jane in California, where she now lives. She is terminally ill, so it’s a bittersweet reunion.

But one I wouldn’t miss for anything. I took with me the album with photos of young Jane and me in Rehoboth. I saved it through at least five moves, including the one to Delaware. There will always be a little part of Jane in Rehoboth for me. And there’s plenty of room for new memories to be made in Rehoboth’s pink sunsets. ▼ Beth Shockley is a retired senior writer/editor living in Dover with her wife and furbabies.

Love where you live.

Live where you love!

Chris Beagle chrisbeaglegroup.com @chrisbeaglegroup M 215.262.6209 | O 302.273.4998

The Chris Beagle Group is a team of real estate licensees affiliated with Compass RE. Compass RE is a licensed real estate broker and abides by Equal Housing Opportunity laws. 131 2nd Street, Lewes DE 19958

MAY 17, 2024

39 Letters

Join us!

Become a member today!

Support our mission.

Join with others to continue our mission of celebrating diversity and building a strong community for all.

37 Baltimore Avenue, Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971 | 302.227.5620 | camprehoboth.com Letters 40 MAY 17, 2024

CAMP REHOBOTH MEMBERSHIP Join today to support our mission!

RAINBOW MEMBERS RECEIVE:

• Basic Membership Package - Advance ticket sales to CAMP Rehoboth events - Recognition in Letters from CAMP Rehoboth - Rainbow Member window cling(s) - Weekly “What’s Happening at CAMP” email • Discount on CAMP Rehoboth Event Tickets for Levels Green and above (as noted) • Free Health Screenings, Counseling Services, and Support Groups • Youth, Adult and Senior Programs, Services and Outreach • The satisfaction of knowing you are helping others!

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CAMPNews Continued from page 12 Pride Build

Wednesday, June 26, 8:30 a.m.-3:00 p.m.

Sussex County Habitat for Humanity is hosting a Pride Build on Wednesday, June 26. CAMP Rehoboth’s offices will close for the event, so join the staff and board members for fellowship, community, and service.

This event is sure to fill up fast! Register online.

National HIV Testing Day Thursday, June 27, all day

CAMP Rehoboth will recognize National HIV Testing Day by having testing available all day at the community center and at select CAMPsafe’s satellite locations around Sussex County.

Basic + 25% ticket discount and one 1/4 page ad in Letters from CAMP Rehoboth

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☐ $600 annual or ☐ $50 monthly Basic + 10% ticket discount

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RATHER JOIN ONLINE? Go to camprehoboth.com/membership Call 302-227-5620 or visit us at 37 Baltimore Avenue.

June 28 & 29, CAMP Rehoboth’s Elkins-Archibald Atrium

Hear the revelations from the night of the Stonewall riots in the exciting and moving production, Voices from Stonewall, on stage at CAMP Rehoboth Community Center.

Voices from Stonewall premiered at CAMP Rehoboth in 2019 on Stonewall’s 50th Anniversary.

Attendees will hear the words of the people who were there when bottles flew, police wagons arrived, and young drag queens, homeless kids, transgender youth, some butch lesbians, and a collection of gay people surprised the police and finally fought back.

The show was written by playwright Michael Gilles and writer Fay Jacobs, and is directed by Jacobs. Purchase tickets online at camprehoboth.com.

Bus Trip - NYC Pride Parade

Sunday, June 30, 7:00 a.m., departing from Home Depot in Lewes

Join the CAMP Rehoboth bus trip to the NYC Pride Parade on Sunday, June 30. This year is the 55th Anniversary of the Stonewall Riots. Ticket includes your round-trip seat on the Jolly Trolley bus and light refreshments for the trip. ▼

MAY 17, 2024

41 Letters

Straight Talk

BY DAVID GARRETT

Raising the Flag for PFLAG

L

inda was overwhelmed by many mixed emotions.

Embarrassment, confusion, disappointment, and anxiety all scrambled together like some unfortunate train wreck.

“I didn’t handle it well, when she finally came to us and told us. She said, ‘Mom, I’m gay.’ And I said, ‘No, you’re not.’”

Her daughter, early in her college years, shared with Linda that she was coming out as lesbian. Linda had always thought of her daughter as a tomboy, holding fast to the memory of her daughter wearing her gaucho boots, gun holster, and a sassy attitude. Just the utterance of “lesbian” rocked her world, threw her off center as a parent, and created so many uncertainties for the future.

As with all parents, Linda had certain expectations on behalf of her children.

That included the traditional straight marriage, grandchildren, a secure job, and a lovely home for the Norman Rockwell setting. She ended up getting everything except the straight marriage!

Linda muses, “It’s the best life for them!

We are very blessed.”

A book by Ellen DeGeneres’ mother, Betty, changed Linda’s outlook and led her to accepting her daughter being gay.

“I sat on the beach, read this book, and it was life-changing for me.” That book is Love, Ellen: A Mother/Daughter Journey.

Linda Gregory has since taken her personal journey and made it her mission to help other parents process and embrace their children’s coming out and their transitions. All of her previous expectations of her daughter’s life have been fulfilled.

Rehoboth Beach had gone years without a PFLAG chapter, until Linda started one. “I felt called—and this was a God thing—to look into PFLAG because there wasn’t anything here in Rehoboth.

I went to Steve [Elkins] and Murray [Archibald], wondering how I am going to do this, where am I going to do this? I went to them, and they said, ‘Whatever Letters 42 MAY 17, 2024

you need, we are going to support you.’

A few of us went to Wilmington to see what a PFLAG group was.”

Parents and Friends of Lesbians And Gays is a national nonprofit organization dedicated to helping those whose family members and friends come out or transition. This movement began when Jeanne Manford walked in the June 1972 Christopher Street Liberation Day March, in support of her son Morty. She carried a sign that read, “Parents of Gays: Unite in Support for Our Children.” Over the next few years, PFLAG was born—and flourished.

“I didn’t handle it well, when she finally came to us and told us. She said, ‘Mom, I’m gay.’ And I said, ‘No, you’re not.’”

In 2014, PFLAG decided to go by its initials alone. It signifies the target audience which cannot be broken apart.

From its website, we read that “This also more accurately reflects PFLAG members, those who PFLAG serves, and the inclusive work PFLAG has been doing for decades.”

While one might expect the need for PFLAG to be less in this region where the LGBTQ+ community is more widely accepted, the struggle of parents to come to terms with their family members’ disclosure of being queer is real. Since the 1970s, new generations of those claiming their sexual orientation and gender identity have been raised.

And they have brought with them new generations of parents who experience the same mix of feelings that Linda felt.

New leaders are firmly in place to lead PFLAG-Rehoboth. Chris Selitto and Angela Scott are a team of committed community activists. They meet the third

Tuesday of each month at the Lewes Library. Lives are still being changed and families are still being united in love due to their efforts. Just ask Sarah.

Sarah (a pseudonym due to confidentiality) shared how her son transitioned. It was a journey with unexpected twists and turns. In his twenties, he came out as gay, and Sarah was able to understand and accept that.

A few years later, however, he informed her that he was going to transition. “I worried about how others would accept him. It was a process of me telling my friends, my inner circle. He underwent surgery and it was the right thing for him. My friends told me that they have never seen him more relaxed, more communicative. It was a wonderful thing to hear.”

When asked what advice she would give other parents whose child is transitioning, Sarah said, “Be patient, try to understand. And this is your child!

Love them and be there with them, in whatever way you can. It’s a process.”

We should raise the flag for PFLAG! Parents, and other family members of those who identify in the LGBTQ+ spectrum, make for valuable allies in the daily encounters with prejudice, discrimination, and outright hostility in the ongoing search for equality. As Sarah says, she “...finds great satisfaction in being a listening ear, a mentor to those who need it.” ▼ David Garrett, a CAMP Rehoboth Board member, is a straight advocate for equality and inclusion. He is also the proud father of an adult trans daughter. Email David Garrett at davidg@camprehoboth.com.

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43 Letters

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Letters 44 MAY 17, 2024

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MAY 17, 2024

45 Letters

Motion is Lotion

BY JON ADLER KAPLAN

Get Moving in May!

M

ay is National Fitness Month, a time to celebrate the incredible things our bodies can do. But let’s face it, sometimes the whole “getting fit” thing can feel a little…well, like homework. Maybe you envision endless hours on the treadmill, or lifting weights that seem heavier than your weekend plans.

But what if I told you there’s a simpler, and dare I say, more enjoyable way to keep your body happy and healthy?

Enter the magic mantra of the movement world: Motion is lotion!

That’s right—forget fancy creams and potions (although sunscreen is always a must at the beach!). Our bodies are designed to move. Regular movement helps lubricate our joints, keeping them flexible and healthy. Think of it like giving your insides a little spa day!

Now, this doesn’t mean you have to become a gym rat overnight. Even small bursts of activity throughout the day can make a big difference. Take the stairs instead of the elevator, park further away from the store, or have a dance party in your living room (guilty pleasure, anyone?).

Speaking of delightful destinations, here’s where the beach comes in. Soak up the sunshine, feel the sand between your toes, and breathe in that glorious salty air. It turns out, a trip to the beach is a fantastic way to celebrate National Fitness Month.

Here’s why the beach is your body’s BFF: • The Great Outdoors: Being in nature has a well-documented way of boosting our mood and reducing stress. The sound of the waves and the vastness of the ocean can be incredibly calming.

• Vitamin Sea (Seriously): Salt air is packed with negative ions, which some studies suggest may improve energy levels and overall well-being.

• Natural Resistance Training: Walking Letters 46 MAY 17, 2024

on sand engages more muscles than walking on pavement, giving your legs a bit of a workout.

• Aquatic Adventures: Take a dip in the ocean! Buoyancy helps ease joint stress, while swimming is a fantastic full-body workout.

and feel the thrill of riding the ocean’s power.

• Stand Up Paddleboarding (SUP): Enjoy a serene paddle while getting a core workout.

• Beach Yoga: The sound of the waves provides the perfect soundtrack for a mindful yoga session.

• Beach Frisbee™: Unleash your inner child with a game of Frisbee. It’s a great way to work on coordination and agility (just be mindful of beachgoers!).

• Boardwalk Walking: Turn your boardwalk stroll into a circuit workout. Run a block, jog a block, until you reach the end of the boardwalk. Do push-ups on the benches.

• Sandcastle Building: Channel your inner architect and create a masterpiece.

It’s a surprisingly good workout, especially if you’re digging moats and hauling buckets of sand.

Listen to Your Body

It turns out, a trip to the beach is a fantastic way to celebrate National Fitness Month.

Beachside Bonanza: Fun Ways to Move Your Body Now that you know the beach is a fitness wonderland, let’s get moving! Here are some ideas to get your heart pumping and your joints lubricated (remember, lotion!): • Beach Volleyball: Bump, set, spike!

This classic beach game is a fun way to get some cardio and social interaction.

• Boogie Boarding: Catch some waves

Remember, it’s all about finding activities you enjoy and that fit your fitness level.

Don’t push yourself too hard, especially in the hot sun. Stay hydrated, take breaks in the shade, and most importantly, have fun!

So, this National Fitness Month, ditch the gym intimidation and embrace the joy of movement. Head to the beach, feel the sand beneath your feet, and let your body be the lotion. You might be surprised at how good it feels to move your body and celebrate the amazing things it can do. ▼ Jon Adler Kaplan is a health and fitness coach. He is a virtual trainer and also trains at Rise Fitness and Adventure. If you have any fitness questions you may reach Jon at jonadlerkaplan@gmail.com.

C A M P Re h o b o t h C h o r u s p r e s e n t s

On the a musical journey

S U M M E R

2 0 2 4

June 14-15 @ 7pm ■ June 16 @ 3pm

Doug Yetter • Artistic Director David Zipse and the CAMP Chorus Band CAMP Rehoboth

Epworth United Methodist Church • Rehoboth Beach, Delaware

$25 • Get tickets at camprehoboth.com

CAMP Rehoboth Chorus is supported, in part, by a grant from the Delaware Division of the Arts, a state agency, in partnership with the National Endowment for the Arts. The Division promotes Delaware arts events on DelawareScene.com

MAY 17, 2024

47 Letters

CAMPsafe Serves Our Community

PREVENT HIV & Mpox FREE Condoms—Protect Yourself!

FREE condoms (internal, external, non-latex) and dental dams are ALWAYS available at CAMP Rehoboth and other locations, including Diego’s, Freddie’s, Aqua, and all free walk-in HIV testing sites.

Mpox: YOU can stop the spread!

Mpox can spread through skin-to-skin contact with a person with mpox, or contact with their saliva, upper respiratory secretions, and areas around the genitals.

Find the latest information on mpox and where to get vaccines at cdc.gov/poxvirus/ mpox/

PrEP, HIV PEP, and Mpox PEP

PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) is a medication taken daily that can reduce your chance of getting HIV. HIV PEP (postexposure prophylaxis) is a medication that must be taken within 72 hours after a possible exposure to prevent HIV. Mpox PEP reduces your chances of getting mpox after possible exposure to the mpox virus. To find out more, visit cdc.gov/hiv/default.html

FREE WALK-IN HIV TESTING Free, rapid, walk-in HIV testing and counseling is available at CAMP Rehoboth and in western Sussex County. Testing days/times are subject to change; please call ahead to verify the current testing schedule.

CAMP Rehoboth 37 Baltimore Ave., Rehoboth Beach, DE Tel: 302-227-5620 Mondays......................................... 10 AM-1 PM Tuesdays..................................... 2:30-4:30 PM Wednesdays............................................1-4 PM Thursdays.................................................1-3 PM Fridays ........................................... 9 AM-12 PM ACE Peer Resource Center - Georgetown 20707 Dupont Blvd., Georgetown, DE Tel: 302-585-4963 ACE Peer Resource Center - Seaford 547 N. Bradford St., Seaford, DE Tel: 302-628-3016

Higher Ground Outreach 12 E. Pine St., Georgetown, DE Tel: 302-470-7497 Laurel State Service Center 31039 N. Poplar St., Laurel, DE Tel: 302-227-5620* *Call CAMP Rehoboth to schedule an HIV test at the Laurel State Service Center.

Springboard Village 411 Kimmey St., Georgetown, DE Tel: 302-253-8246

Addiction Medical Facility - Seaford 1309 Bridgeville Hwy., Seaford, DE Tel: 302-629-2300

KNOW YOUR STATUS! Results in only 15 minutes!

No Hassle!

Letters 48 MAY 17, 2024

GET TESTED with Joe Vescio, HIV testing volunteer, on Wednesdays, 1-4 p.m. at CAMP Rehoboth

Scan the QR Code for the most up-todate testing hours and locations.

GETTING TO KNOW YOU Continued from page 18

DAVID ZIPSE: It’s a great group of people, making great music under a great director. What’s not to love?

BF: What challenges do you face as a musician in collaborating with a chorus like this?

DZ: The challenges are many, but I enjoy a good challenge! Accompanying is fun, but sometimes Doug gives me new music right before rehearsal, so then sightreading is a challenge. I also write charts for the band, and I love to arrange, but writing the charts to sound like the originals can be a challenge.

Then rehearsing the band before getting together with the chorus can be a challenge with the time limitations.

But it’s a great band, and they’re professionals, so that helps a lot!

Larry Rosen and Barry Bugg are production managers and have worked with theater and choral production for more years than either is willing to admit, including with the Gay Men’s Chorus of Washington, DC. BF: You have managed sound, light, choralography, and technical issues of staging choruses large and small, venues large and small, and equipment deluxe and shoddy. What are the challenges you encounter in CAMP Rehoboth Chorus productions?

LARRY & BARRY: The Chorus is fortunate in having Epworth as its main performance venue. The church was designed with both worship and performance in mind, with excellent audio/visual equipment and lighting.

This allows us to enhance the choral performance with complementary lighting, images, costuming, and movement.

The challenges we face reflect the demographics of the Chorus and the community at large—an aging population and some members with mobility issues.

Solutions may be as simple as singers using music during concerts, setting the lights brighter to make reading easier, and providing seating for those who may have difficulty standing for a full concert.

The size of the Chorus, the space on the

Barry Bugg

Jeff Buhrman

Larry Rosen

Doug Yetter

risers, and physical limitations of some members limit choralography options to accommodate all. Through whatever challenges, our singers always rise to the occasion.

Jeff Buhrman is Assistant Artistic Director and Vocal Coach. He was a teacher and high school choral director for 25 years before moving into the LGBTQA+ choral movement, and he was Artistic Director of the Gay Men’s Chorus of Washington, DC, and Voices of Kentuckiana before retiring to Rehoboth Beach.

BF: You have recently joined the CAMP Rehoboth Chorus family as a rehearsal coach and voice coach, after a career spent as teacher, artistic director of several choruses, and consultant.

What are your impressions of this community Chorus and its strengths?

JEFF BUHRMAN: The Chorus has surprised me with its robust vocal quality and showmanship. I see my role as filling in the areas that are difficult to cover in regular rehearsals. I conduct sectional rehearsals to work on specific problem areas in the music. I also am conducting vocal workshops that focus on my list of “Questions Every Singer Should Ask When They Open Their Mouth to Sing!” including tips on breathing, vocalization, pronunciation, proper inflection in singing the lyrics, and staying in each of our “beauty boxes.” I try to keep our time together fun, useful, and spirited.

Look around at the concert: some of these folks will be front-and-center; others, off to the side or behind the piano; some, you may never see. But along with the singers on the risers, they are an integral part of creating a fabulous concert experience. Bravo, one and all! ▼ Bill Fuchs retired here from DC nine years ago; he has been with the Chorus since 2016.

He has the distinction of having married two college sweethearts—not at the same time!

He loves music, theatre, travel, and his longhaired Chihuahua.

MAY 17, 2024

49 Letters

Historical Headliners

BY ANN APTAKER

Music in a Man’s World: Billy Tipton

I

n many LGBTQ+ circles, Billy Tipton is considered a trans hero before sex reassignment surgery was available; a transman who lived his life and pursued his musical ambition without apology at a time when trans life was considered a perversity, and thus illegal.

In other circles, queer and straight, even among some professional historians who’ve studied Tipton’s extraordinary life, he was a poseur who lived as a male only because it was sometimes impossible for female musicians to get jobs in jazz bands.

What if both are right?

Dorothy Lucille Tipton was born in December 1914 in Oklahoma City, though the future jazzman was raised by an aunt in Kansas City, Missouri, after Dorothy’s parents divorced. By the time young Tipton was in high school, life took two profound directions: pursuit of music and a change of identity. With a love of jazz piano and saxophone, Dorothy Lucille Tipton became Tippy Tipton, musically talented but ultimately forbidden to join the school’s all-male band.

When Tipton was 19 years old, he began binding his chest and presenting as male. He dropped the name Tippy and took on the name he’d carry for the rest of his life: Billy. This completely male persona—well dressed, well barbered— eased his entrance into the macho world of professional jazz musicians.

By 1936, Tipton was a professional musician, leading a band playing on local radio stations. His musical talent attracted prominent bandleaders who brought him into their bands, and Tipton spent the remainder of the 1930s and ’40s touring the Midwest with jazz and swing bands popular at the time.

But Billy wasn’t content to play music under other bandleaders’ direction. In the early 1950s, Tipton formed his own band, the Billy Tipton Trio. The band toured widely to excellent reviews. In 1956, the band was offered a contract by the independent record label, Tops Records. The two albums recorded by the trio for Tops sold over 17,000 copies, a formidable Letters 50 MAY 17, 2024

number for a small record label.

Throughout this period of touring and recording, no one questioned Billy’s gender; not even the women he dated and a woman he lived with in a domestic relationship, Non Earl Harrell, whom he’d met in 1934, and who referred to herself as Mrs. Billy Tipton. The relationship lasted until 1942. Other relationships and “Mrs. Tiptons” followed.

By the time young Tipton was in high school, life took two profound directions: pursuit of music and a change of identity.

In 1958 the Holiday Hotel and Casino in Reno offered the Billy Tipton Trio the position as their house band, plus opening for major name acts. Tops Records also offered the trio a contract for additional recordings. True stardom was at their feet.

Billy turned the offers down. He opted instead to set up shop in Spokane, Washington as a talent and booking agent, relegating the Billy Tipton Trio to playing only weekly in the Spokane area.

Questions have swirled around this seemingly irrational decision to turn his back on stardom. According to some, including scholar Diane Middlebrook, author of the Tipton biography Suits Me: The Double Life of Billy Tipton, Billy based

this decision on the heightened scrutiny he’d receive as a major star, fearing that sooner or later he’d be outed as a biological female, which would end his musical career in humiliation.

Others vehemently disagree with this interpretation, among them, filmmaker Chase Joynt, co-director of the Tipton bio-film No Ordinary Man. In Joynt’s view, Billy chose to live a quiet life in Spokane for two reasons: first, he was in a longterm domestic relationship with a woman named Maryann, and later with ex-dancer Kitty Kelly, with whom he eventually adopted three sons. In this interpretation, the “family man” side of Billy was ascendent. A second reason, Joynt contends, is that there is evidence that Billy was developing arthritis in his hands, making playing piano and saxophone increasingly painful—and eventually impossible, a situation exacerbated by performing nightly.

Billy Tipton continued to present as male for the rest of his life. His family, including his wife Kitty (and the previous women in his life) stated after his death that the man they knew was indeed male, a status Billy successfully facilitated by fabricating a story that his chest had been injured (hence the binding) and male genitalia destroyed in an early automobile accident.

It wasn’t until his death in 1989 from an untreated peptic ulcer that the ambulance crew’s efforts to resuscitate Billy revealed his biological gender. Nonetheless, Billy’s persona as male and a family man was evidently so thorough that after his death at age 74, his son Scott said: “I think he probably never told us because he was afraid we might have rejected him. I could have accepted it. He did a helluva good job with us. That’s what mattered. He was my dad.”

Sweet music, indeed.▼ Ann Aptaker is the author of short stories and the Lambda & three-time Goldie award winning Cantor Gold series. Her latest book, A Crime of Secrets, was released in July 2023.

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MAY 17, 2024

51 Letters

BY THE LANTERNS’ BRIGHT GLOW….

BY NANCY SAKADUSKI

MATTY AND NATHANAEL’S

Excellent Adventure

“D Memorial Day honors and mourns military personnel who died while serving in the United States Armed Forces...

Letters 52 MAY 17, 2024

o you ever come here by yourself at night?” Nathanael asked the guide as he entered the dark and somewhat dank underground Battery 519 with only lanterns for light. Nathanael Wilson and Matty Brown were there for one of the many wonderful programs offered at Cape Henlopen State Park—a lantern tour at Fort Miles Historical Area. With Memorial Day approaching, the intrepid duo was there for an out-of-the-ordinary evening and an opportunity to learn about Lewes’s role in World War II. At the peak of the war, more than 2,500 soldiers and civilian personnel were stationed at Fort Miles. Soldiers at the fort kept up surveillance and guarded the vital water access to Wilmington, Philadelphia, and other potential targets for German invasion.

The main threats were battleships, U-boats (a type of submarine), and airplanes.

Following an orientation in the— well—orientation building, Matty and Nathanael followed the guides on a path by some of the large guns in the Fort Miles Artillery Park. The word guns doesn’t do them justice, as the

enormous weapons required up to 17 men to operate and fired shells ranging from three to 12 inches in diameter.

The shells for the largest gun (inside Battery 519) weighed 800-1,000 pounds and required a ceiling-mounted track (still there) to transport them inside the building.

One of Nathanael’s favorite parts of the tour was the overlook on the way to Battery 519. Beyond the dunes and the bay, he could see the lights of Cape May glowing in the distance and imagine

“The entire tour reinforced the notion that military history is also a collection of family histories.” being on high alert, watching for enemy boats in the dark waters. One of the tasks at Fort Miles was the construction of a controlled submarine mine complex to support three lines of mines across Delaware Bay’s primary shipping channel. (While German U-boats laid mines and torpedoed ships off the Delaware coast, no enemy warships threatened Fort Miles during World War II.) Winding through the dim hallways of Battery 519, Matty and Nathanael followed the guides, who pointed out a spotlight that had been used to track aircraft. Civilian observers, many of whom were men declared unfit for military service (4-F), played an essential role at Fort Miles. They learned to identify aircraft by their silhouettes and report their positions.

Matty and Nathanael paused at the Fort Miles Museum Wall of Honor.

The wall was created by the Fort Miles Historic Association to recognize veterans and civilians who served, and

in some cases sacrificed their lives, for their country.

So, why a lantern tour? “It made a difference seeing the tour at night,” said Matty. “The lanterns made us feel like detectives, in a way, uncovering history with our lights as we approached memorial bricks and the big guns.”

The tour guides used personal stories and anecdotes to bring the past to life. Matty said his favorite was the story of a veteran who took one of the abandoned mines home and used it as a backyard grill (it’s now in the museum).

After describing what working in Battery 519 was like, the guides had everyone turn off their lanterns so they could experience a real, can’t-see-your-handin-front-of-your-face blackout. It was a good reminder of what living with the threat of invasion was like.

Memorial Day honors and mourns military personnel who died while serving in the United States Armed Forces (as opposed to Veterans Day,

which honors US military veterans).

“I had many family members serve in WWII,” said Matty, “including my greatuncle, a fighter pilot stationed, and sadly fallen, in Europe, and my grandfather, a recon soldier who was based in Australia and the Philippines.”

For Matty, the stories told at Fort Miles—such as civilians participating in surveillance for planes—made him think of them. “In fact,” he says, “the entire tour reinforced the notion that military history is also a collection of family histories.”

As they emerged from Battery 519, Matty and Nathanael looked up. With so little ambient light, they marveled at the stars spread across the sky. A doe wandered by, perhaps to see what was going on, a reminder that the area is also a park that supports many kinds of wildlife.

Although Matty and Nathanael agreed that they probably wouldn’t want to spend a night alone in the battery, they learned a lot, and both said they will definitely do it again.

“Reliving the Fort Miles experience during the war was thrilling,” said Matty, who particularly liked experiencing a blackout in the bunker. “Hearing about the evolution of military strategy is fascinating,” he added, “and just looking at how big the guns were (and how little they were used!).” ▼ The Fort Miles Museum and Historical Area is located within Cape Henlopen State Park.

To learn more about lantern tours and other programs, go to destateparks.com/FortMiles.

Nancy Sakaduski is an award-winning writer and editor who owns Cat & Mouse Press in Lewes, Delaware.

Photos: Vincent DeLissio

MAY 17, 2024

53 Letters

SUSSEX COUNTY’S CHOICE

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MAY 17, 2024

55 Letters

CAMP Stories

BY RICH BARNETT

Franken Toes and Gastronomical Woes

I

was enjoying a cocktail recently with some friends at one of our local outdoor drinking establishments. It was an unseasonably warm evening and most of the gentlemen in attendance were attired in shorts and t-shirts, showing off pale flesh and pushing the summer season.

In such an erotically charged environment, the talk should have been about the bartender with light-up nipple rings or the guy with the amazing Tom Hopper-like arms. (Yes, I’ve been binge watching the pirate series Black Sails.)

Rather, it turned to knee replacements and bad backs. When someone began a saga about his search for probiotic stool softeners, my nose naturally wrinkled.

Too much information! I guzzled down my cocktail and took off to the bar so I could step away from that conversation without appearing rude.

It got me wondering. Why does it seem everyone 60 years and older revels in regaling anyone who will listen with tales of gastronomical woes?

Some aging experts believe it’s all about camaraderie. They will tell you nothing bonds two seniors quite like comparing colonoscopies. It’s a form of solidarity, really—united against the ravages of time. Others argue it’s about competition. Just because one ages doesn’t mean one’s competitive nature declines. By showcasing the ability to manage or cope with health issues, our older brothers and sisters might receive praise or admiration from peers, thereby reinforcing their self-esteem. Haven’t we all been exposed to the mesmerizing game of “my symptoms are worse than yours?”

Then there’s the storytelling aspect.

Old age, it has been said, is like attending the world’s longest improv class, where every bodily quirk becomes an opportunity for a riveting narrative.

What may seem like a mundane doctor’s appointment transforms into a gripping saga filled with plot twists (or rather, muscle twists) and a cast of characters Letters 56 MAY 17, 2024

straight out of a medical soap opera.

I’ll confess that since recently undergoing foot surgery, this old boy has taken great pleasure in showing

Old age, it has been said, is like attending the world’s longest improv class, where every bodily quirk becomes an opportunity for a riveting narrative. off photos of said foot with stiches and bruises and metal pins sticking out of the end of my toes. They look like something from the movie Frankenstein.

I bought an antique wooden walking cane with a hidden flask just to add a touch of style to the whole recovery drama.

And because the real reason for my surgery was kind of boring, I invented a more entertaining tale—one about a friend (who will not be named) dropping a glass liter bottle of vodka on my foot,

shattering the bones in my toes. People both laugh and gasp at this. And when they figure out who dropped the bottle the story becomes even funnier and more believable.

Look, I know it’s natural to talk about what is going on in our lives, whether one is in his twenties, forties, or sixties.

I do it all the time. And I know how talking about ailments and illness is much healthier than hiding our health problems. But folks, don’t you think we need a few guidelines when someone steers the conversation toward the enigmatic world of gastrointestinal woes?

I’m thinking a five-minute limit should suffice. And no tummy talks at dinner parties or in restaurants. Look, while someone may be an enthusiastic storyteller, most people aren’t keen on mental pictures of digestive distress while nibbling on canapés. Cue the cringe! The reality is—bodily functions are best left to the imagination.

The reality though, dear readers, is there’s really no way to manage conversation content. So, the next time you encounter a “seasoned” individual waxing poetically about his or her health, you can run. Or you can embrace the moment. If you choose the latter, remember you’re witnessing a true masterclass in the art of aging. Youth is fleeting, but a good story about sciatica is a tale for the ages. ▼ Rich Barnett is the author of The Discreet Charms of a Bourgeois Beach Town, and Fun with Dick and James.

TICKETS ARE ON SALE!

-ScheduleTHURSDAY JUNE 13 Copa 71 Close to You (Mid-Atlantic Premier) Cora Bora

2:00 PM 6:00 PM 8:30 PM

FRIDAY JUNE 14 Chuck Chuck Baby National Anthem

TRICK (1999) John Paul Pitoc & Christian Campbell

4:00 PM 8:15 PM

SATURDAY JUNE 15 Summer Qamp 90’s Retro Party Safe Word (Short Film) TRICK, 25-Year Retrospective

Director Jim Fall will host a post-film discussion

2:00 PM 7:00 PM 8:00 PM 8:15 PM

Cinema Art Theater in Lewes 302-313-4032 info@rehobothfilm.com

17701 Dartmouth Drive Dartmouth Plaza, Lewes (behind Wawa)

In partnership with

SUNDAY JUNE 16 Hidden Master: 2:00 PM The Legacy of George Platt Lynes (Mid-Atlantic Premier)

A House Is Not a Disco

5:00 PM

VISIT REHOBOTHFILM.COM TO VIEW FILM SYNOPSIS.

FESTIVAL FILM TICKETS START AT $9.00

Purchase online, at the CAT Box Office or by phone at 302-313-4032

rehobothfilm.com MAY 17, 2024

57 Letters

Letters 58 MAY 17, 2024

MAY 17, 2024

59 Letters

CAMP REHOBOTH BEACH GUIDE BEACH AREA LODGING Atlantic Sands Hotel, Boardwalk & Baltimore Ave.........................302-227-2511 Atlantic View Hotel, Ocean Front 2 Clayton St, Dewey.................302-227-3878 Atlantis Inn, 154 Rehoboth Ave.....................................................302-227-9446 Beach View Hotel, 6 Wilmington Ave.............................................302-227-2999 Breakers Hotel, 105 2nd St & Baltimore Ave.................................302-227-6688 Canalside Inn, 34 6th St.................................................................302-226-2006 Rehoboth Guest House, 40 Maryland Ave.....................................302-227-4117 Sea ‘n Stars Guest Suites, 44 Delaware Ave.................................302-226-2742 Summer Place Hotel, 1st St & Olive Ave........................................302-226-0766 The Avenue Inn & Spa, 33 Wilmington Ave....................................302-226-2900

LEWES FOOD & DRINK

Visit the Beach Guide Directory on the CAMP Rehoboth website to find links to these area businesses in BOLD. The Guide includes: Food and Wine, Shopping, Lodging, and Services—all at camprehoboth.com.

REHOBOTH RETAIL SHOPS Atlantic Jewelry, 313 South Boardwalk.........................................302-226-0675 New Wave Spas, 20660 Coastal Hwy............................................302-227-8484 Stuart Kingston Gallery, 19470 Coastal Hwy.................................302-227-2524 Unfinished Business, 18389 Olde Coach Rd.................................302-645-8700

REHOBOTH ART | GALLERIES | MUSEUMS Gallery 50, 50 Wilmington Ave......................................................302-227-2050 Rehoboth Art League, 12 Dodds Ln...............................................302-227-8408 Rehoboth Beach Museum, 511 Rehoboth Ave..............................302-227-7310

REHOBOTH FOOD & DRINK 1776 Steakhouse, Midway Shopping Center................................302-645-9355 Aqua, 57 Baltimore Ave................................................................ 302-226-9001 Back Porch Café, 59 Rehoboth Ave...............................................302-227-3674 Blue Moon, 35 Baltimore Ave........................................................302-227-6515 Café Azafrán, 18 Baltimore Ave.....................................................302-227-8100 Chesapeake & Maine, 316 Rehoboth Ave.....................................302-226-3600 Coho’s Market & Grill, 305 Rehoboth Ave......................................302-227-2646 Diego’s Bar Nightclub, 37298 Rehoboth Ave................................302-227-1023 Dogfish Head Brewings & Eats 320 Rehoboth Ave.......................302-226-2739 Dos Locos, 208 Rehoboth Ave.......................................................302-227-3353 Freddie’s Beach Bar & Restaurant, 3 South First St.......................302-527-1400 Go Fish, 24 Rehoboth Ave..............................................................302-226-1044 Goolee’s Grille, 11 South 1st St.....................................................302-227-7653 Just In Thyme, 38163 Robinsons Dr..............................................302-227-3100 Lori’s Café, 39 Baltimore Ave.........................................................302-226-3066 Loves Liquors, LLC, 305c Rehoboth Ave........................................302-227-6966 Lupo Italian Kitchen, 247 Rehoboth Ave.......................................302-226-2240 Purple Parrot Grill, 134 Rehoboth Ave...........................................302-226-1139 Rigby’s, 404 Rehoboth Ave............................................................302-227-6080 Shorebreak Lodge, 10 Wilmington Ave.........................................302-227-1007 The Pines, 56 Baltimore Avenue....................................................302-567-2726

Letters 60 MAY 17, 2024

Go Brit, 18388 Coastal Hwy...........................................................302-644-2250 Harbour Waterfront Dining, 134 West Market St...........................302-200-9522 Matt’s Fish Camp, 34401 Tenley Ct...............................................302-644-2267

OTHER AREA FOOD & DRINK Bluecoast Seafood, 30904 Coastal Hwy, Bethany........................302-539-7111 Catch 54, 38931 Madison Ave, Selbyville.....................................302-436-8600 Matt’s Fish Camp, 28635 Coastal Hwy, Bethany...........................302-539-2267

SERVICES AT THE BEACH BUILDING/CLEANING/REMODELING/LANDSCAPING

A.G. Renovations ...........................................................................302-947-4096 bsd, 35603 South St............................................................ 302-684-8588

CHURCHES/SYNAGOGUES

All Saints’ Episcopal, 18 Olive Ave.................................................302-227-7202 Epworth UMC, 19285 Holland Glade Rd.......................................302-227-7743 Grace of God Lutheran, ELCA, 26089 Shoppes at Long Neck.......302-947-1044 M.C.C. of Rehoboth, 19369 Plantation Rd.....................................302-645-4945 Seaside Jewish Community, 18970 Holland Glade Rd..................302-226-8977 St. George’s Episcopal, 20271 Beaver Dam Rd, Harbeson..............302-227-7202 St. Peter’s Episcopal, 2nd & Market Sts, Lewes.............................302-645-8479 Unitarian Universalist, 30486 Lewes-G’Town Hwy........................302-313-5838 Unity of Rehoboth, 98 Rudder Rd, Millsboro.................................302-945-5253 Westminster Presbyterian, 301 King Charles Ave.........................302-227-2109

COMMUNITY RESOURCES

AARP of Delaware (age 50+)..........................................................866-227-7441 ACLU of DE—Lesbian & Gay Civil Rights Project............................302-654-5326 CAMP Rehoboth Chorus—Program of CAMP Rehoboth................302-227-5620 CAMP Rehoboth—LGBTQ Community Service Org........................302-227-5620 CAMP Rehoboth Families—LGBTQ parents connect......................302-227-5620 CAMP Rehoboth Parents of Transgender & Gender Non-conforming Children............................................302-227-5620 Cape Henlopen Senior Center—Rehoboth (age 50+)....................302-227-2055 CHEER Centers of Sussex County (age 50+)..................................302-515-3040 Delaware Aging & Disability Resource Center...............................800-223-9074 Delaware Human Relations Commission Housing & public accommodation............................................877-544-8626 Delaware Information Line............................................................................2-1-1 Delaware Pride—Community events, annual Pride Festival..........302-265-3020

Gay/Lesbian Alcoholics Anonymous—add’l schedules..................302-856-6452 Saturdays 6 pm: Epworth UMC, 19285 Holland Glade Rd (step meeting) Saturdays 7:30 pm: All Saints’ Church, 18 Olive Ave (step meeting) Tuesdays noon: St. Peter’s Church, 211 Mulberry St, Lewes (step meeting) Lewes Senior Activity Center (age 50+).........................................302-645-9293 Meals on Wheels Lewes-Rehoboth................................................302-645-7449 PFLAG-Rehoboth—3rd Tuesdays, Public Library, 111 Adams Ave, Lewes Social Security Administration—Georgetown office......................800-772-1213 TransLiance of DE—Rehoboth.........................................TransLiance@gmail.com

COUNSELING/THERAPY/LIFE COACH

Jewish Family Services........................................................ 302-478-9411 Kevin J. Bliss, Personal/Professional Coaching.............................302-754-1954 Nancy Commisso, LCSW, Therapeutic Services.............................703-598-2938 Time to Heal Counseling & Consulting, Lewes ............................302-574-6954

ELECTRICIANS

Silver Electric..................................................................................302-227-1107

FINANCIAL SERVICES

County Bank, 19927 Shuttle Rd.......................................... 302-226-9800 Jenn Harpel, Morgan Stanley.........................................................302-644-6620

FLORISTS

Windsor’s Florist, 20326 Coastal Hwy...........................................302-227-9481

FUNERAL SERVICES

Parsell Funeral Homes & Crematorium................................ 302-645-9520

HAIR SALONS/TATTOO & PIERCING

Beach Cuts, 214 Rehoboth Ave...........................................302-226-ROBB Gregory Meyers Hair Studio, 20245 Bay Vista Rd & Rt 1..............302-727-5331 Stephan & Co Salon & Spa, 19266 Coastal Hwy................... 302-260-9478

HEALTH-RELATED

AIDS Delaware – Kent & Sussex Counties.....................................302-226-3519 AIDS Delaware – New Castle County............................................302-652-6776 AIDS Hotline – Delaware statewide...............................................800-422-0429 Brandywine Urology Consultants...................................................302-824-7039 Beebe Healthcare, 26744 J.J. Williams Hwy.................................302-645-3300 CAMPsafe AIDS education & prevention program of CAMP Rehoboth........................................................................302-227-5620 Christiana Care HIV Wellness Clinic ..............................................302-933-3420 Christiana Care LGBTQ+ Health Initiatives.....................................302-733-3113 Delaware HIV Consortium - Statewide..........................................302-654-5471 Delaware Hospice..........................................................................800-838-9800 Delaware Total Foot & Ankle Center.................................... 302-297-8431 National Alliance on Mental Illness of DE (NAMI)...........................302-427-0787 Rehoboth Beach Dental, 19643 Blue Bird Ln....................... 302-226-7960 Maplewood Dental Associates, 18912 J.J. Williams Hwy..... 302-645-6671

PEST CONTROL

Activ Pest Solutions, 16803 New Rd, Lewes................................ 302-645-1502

PET RETAIL

Critter Beach, 156 Rehoboth Ave..................................................302-226-2690 Pet Portraits by Monique................................................................717-650-4626

PET SERVICES

Brandywine Valley SPCA, 22918 Dupont Blvd, G’twn.......... 302-856-6361 Humane Animal Partners (formerly Delaware Humane Association & Delaware SPCA).......................................................... 302-200-7159 Little Landmines Pet Waste Removal. littlelandmines.com.......... 302-521-3983 Parsell Pet Crematorium, 16961 Kings Hwy, Lewes............ 302-645-7445

REAL ESTATE

Allen Jarmon, NextHome Tomorrow Realty...................................302-745-5122 Chris Beagle, Compass..................................................................302-273-4998 Donna Whiteside, Berkshire Hathaway, 16712 Kings Hwy...........302-381-4871 Hugh Fuller, Realtor........................................................................302-745-1866 John Black, Patterson Schwartz, 18958 Coastal Hwy...................302-703-6987 Lana Warfield, Berkshire Hathaway, 37230 Rehoboth Ave...........302-236-2430 Lee Ann Wilkinson Group, 16698 Kings Hwy....................... 302-645-6664 Lingo Realty, 246 Rehoboth Ave....................................................302-227-3883 McWilliams Ballard, Kevin McDuffie.................................. kmcduffie@mcwb.com McWilliams Ballard, Justin Orr.....................................................jorr@mcwb.com Randy Mason/Shirley Kalvinsky, Lingo Realty................................302-227-3883 Sea Bova Associates, 20250 Coastal Hwy........................... 302-227-1222 The Joe Maggio Group, 37169 Rehoboth Ave Ext., #11....... 302-226-3770 Troy Roberts, Mann & Sons, 414 Rehoboth Ave............................302-228-7422

RETIREMENT LIVING/SENIOR CARE FACILITIES

Springpoint Choice, 17028 Cadbury Cir, Lewes............................302-313-6658 The Lodge at Truitt Homestead, 36233 Farm Ln.................. 302-232-6372

TRAVEL & TRANSPORTATION

Accent On Travel, 37156 Rehoboth Ave.............................. 302-278-6100 CHEER Transportation (age 50+)....................................................302-856-4909 Jolly Trolley Shuttle from Rehoboth Ave & Boardwalk...................302-644-0400 Olivia Travel...........................................................800-631-6277 ext. 696

POPULAR LGBTQ BEACHES

Poodle Beach, south end of the Rehoboth Boardwalk Cape Henlopen State Park, Ocean Dr north to Cape Henlopen State Park. Daily parking rate in effect March-November.

INSURANCE

Eric Blondin, State Farm...................................................... 302-645-7283 Jeanine O’Donnell, State Farm............................................ 302-644-3276

LEGAL/ACCOUNTING/TRUST SERVICES

PWW Law LLC, 1519 Savannah Rd, Lewes................................... 302-628-4140 Steven Falcone CPA, Taxes & Planning..........................................302-644-8634

MASSAGE THERAPY/FITNESS

Midway Fitness & Racquetball, Midway Center.............................302-645-0407 One Spirit Massage, 169 Rehoboth Ave........................................302-226-3552 Reiki CENTRAL, thecentralfirm.com...............................................302-408-0878

MAY 17, 2024

61 Letters

The Sea Salt Table

BY ED CASTELLI

Couscous Tuna Salad

I

t’s May! So it’s finally National “Baby of the Family” Month! OK, that’s not really a thing. But it should be. We’re really undercelebrated.

Was I a tad spoiled as the last of four kids? Sure. But I also had unique pressures. To live up to every teacher who said “oh, I had your brother/ sister.” Not to mention what I sensed was my parents’ hidden desire to finally get it right. Sorry sibs, they succeeded.

There were times it felt like I had five parents. My brother and sisters both looked after and covered for me. And, with my closest sister a distant five and a half years older, I was often left out or struggling to catch up. Big pool for them, kiddy pool for me. Boardwalk bikes for them, while Eddie sleeps in (lest he get cranky later).

As the baby you’re never the trailblazer. You’re not the first to scrape your knee, score an A, or learn to drive. I think, too, I grew up faster. My siblings were already suave, witty, and street smart while I was still geeky and growing into my feet.

My brother, the eldest, was 10+ years my senior. He was (is) the coolest person to walk this earth. I’d spend hours parroting his every move. He crossed his legs, I crossed mine. He popped a zit, I pretended to have one. Poor guy. Especially since we shared bunkbeds in a room that today wouldn’t qualify as a closet.

Everyone sacrificed. Like playing “Shoots and Ladders” when all they really wanted to do was, well, anything else. And my parents often talked about the pain of my being the last to hold their hand, color Easter eggs, or sweat behind the Donald Duck mask. And there was the infamous time I declared there was no Santa, sending my Mom into a spiral of tears.

If I’m being truthful, I think Mom and Dad were a bit tired when I came along.

There are legendary claims I got away with murder. Let’s just say the rules of the house became more relaxed. I played in the street and stayed up late.

But I also suffered greatly as my brother and sisters left the happy litter. With each departure I became a bit unmoored.

Letters 62 MAY 17, 2024

The ruckus pushing and shoving for macn-cheese was ending. As was the bathroom line. And frankly, so many things that make a family fun in hindsight.

Holidays became my happiest times as the house filled again with luggage, laundry, and laughter. Which explains today why I cling to those I love. I’ve learned the hard way, one day they’re apt to move on.

STEPS

 Cook according to package directions, and drain: • 2 cups of pearl couscous

 In a large bowl, whisk:

• Zest from 2 lemons • 6 Tbls fresh lemon juice • ½ cup extra virgin olive oil • 2 pressed garlic cloves • ¼ cup finely diced green onions • 2 to 4 Tbls minced fresh parsley and/or basil • Salt & pepper to taste

Add:

• 1 cup halved grape tomatoes • 1 cup diced cucumber • 1 cup crumbled feta cheese

Gently fold in:

• Reserved couscous • 3 small cans of Italian tuna (packed in olive oil), drained

Holidays became my happiest times as the house filled again with luggage, laundry, and laughter.

My “forever the baby” status comes to mind because May is my birth month. It’s also the month of Memorial Day, which makes us all think of the beach.

So, with this issue I’m highlighting a lunch dish we often pack for the sand, my Couscous Tuna Salad. This recipe packs an economical punch to feed a crowd or cover several meals. There’s no waiting in the concessions line and it’s healthier to boot.

This recipe was inspired by Ina Garten’s Israeli Couscous Salad. My version has morphed over time to include crisp cucumbers and feta cheese.

Let’s get started, shall we?

TIPS • The key to the unique flavor of this salad is the tuna. Splurge to get the best you can find.

• Pearl couscous is also known as Israeli. If you can get the tricolor version, all the better for an even more delicious-looking dish.

• Change up the ingredients for the foods you have on hand. Add fresh corn off the cob. Or some chickpeas. Swap sundried for fresh tomatoes.

Pass the sporks and enjoy! ▼ Ed and his husband Jerry split their time between homes near Harrisburg Pennsylvania and Bethany Beach. Ed builds websites to pay the bills but loves to cook, garden, hike, and dote on their dog Atticus.

WILL YOUR PLAN WORK?

Will your Power of Attorney actually do its job?

Every week we see Powers of Attorney that have sections omitted, crossed through, or left blank. Worse yet, they don’t name the right people for the job. The worst conversations we have are explaining that a Power of Attorney is insufficient, and we can’t move forward with the recommended planning strategies during incapacity.

Contact us to ensure your estate plan will do its job.

Elder Law We help families shelter their savings from being depleted on the cost of long-term care.

Estate Planning We help families create Wills, Powers of Attorney, and use Trusts to avoid probate.

Estate & Trust Administration We help families settle the matters of their loved ones.

Don’t wait, we can help: 302-628-4140 www.pwwlaw.com MAY 17, 2024

63 Letters

CAMPshots

SCENES FROM REHOBOTH BEACH

FEST Festivities!

Women's Fest Dances, Broadwalk on the Boardwalk, Gumbo Crawl, RB Bear Happy Hour, and More!

THIS PAGE (left to right) 1 ) at CAMP Rehoboth Women's FEST Welcome Dance: Linda Kemp, Kim Richards, Rina Pellegrini, Dawn Kasow, Lisa Evans, Joann Gusdanovic, Debbie Virant, Lisa Piechowski, Kathy Solano, Sherri McGee, Christa Marks, Lisa Koenigsberg, Kris Aulenbach, Mona Picardo, Donna Contagious, Linda Levin, Marianne Squillaciotti, Gwen Bauman, Gaylene Traggiai, Pat West, Zip Warmerdam, Ren Culp, Nancy Wester, Laura Berkin, Storm Whitney, Natalie Darkes, Dina Romang.

OPPOSITE PAGE 2) at CAMP Rehoboth Women's

FEST Welcome Dance: Julian Harbaugh, Deb Harbaugh, Wanda Ashbrook, Barb Clipper, Judith Ashbrook, Graeme Davis, Derrick Johnson, Josh Sheets, Sharon Gorenstein, Kim Letke, Deb Murray, Diane Corsi, Morgan Bonekovic, Meghan Reiser, Jennifer Gold, Mindy Palumbo, Holly Marra; 3) at CAMP Rehoboth Women't FEST Art Reception: Debbie Woods, Christina Lay, Lois Powell, Sharon Denny, Deb Payette.

1

Letters 64 MAY 17, 2024

More CAMPshots page 66

2

3 MAY 17, 2024

65 Letters

SCENES FROM REHOBOTH BEACH

1

(Continued from page 65) THIS PAGE (left to right) 1 ) at CAMP Rehoboth Women's FEST Broadwalk on the Boardwalk: Kathy Styer, Beth Buchter, Marge Amodei, Penni Hope, Jennifer Allen, Cathy Boudah, Marie Shaw, Susan Shollenberger, Minda Lynch, Jadyn Rodkey, Angie Rodkey, Alicia Miller, Barb Thompson, Joanne Yurik, Meg Wraight, Lisa Louis, Marc Montana, Amanda Waldren, Helena Shaer, Zenali Caintic, Sue Ryan, Peggy Dever, Kevin Ussery.

OPPOSITE PAGE: 2) at CAMP Rehoboth Women's FEST Premier Dance: Alizee LaDiamond, Christa Marks, Michelle Manfredi, Tamia Mykles, Natalie A. Foret, Michele Sileo, Stephanie Beasley, Laura Vardy, Cinthia Brando, Karla Yoney, Jessica Dufour, Stefanie Ferrara, Sunshine Vincent, Jaime Flynn, Lynn Verdone, Christine Moll, Gemma Fillmore, Robyn Reale, Marce McCollum, Katie Reale, Kim Letke, Theresa Cappuccino, Barbara Valletto, Dawn Lund, Virgin Levy, Arlene Levy, Patti Layton, Candy Niedoba, Mosh Nevins, Ann Udovich, Eve Wyatt, Maria Bradley, Donna Becker, Matty Brown, Julian Harbaugh, Laurie Thompson, Kim Leisey, Derrick Johnson, Josh Sheets, Vincent DeLissio, Marc McDaniels, Deb Quinton.

(More CAMPshots page 104) Letters 66 MAY 17, 2024

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MAY 17, 2024

67 Letters

THE MAGIC OF MUSIC

BY PATTIE CINELLI

If Music Be the Food of Love

I

activated the camera button on my phone, sat on a ledge next to the stage, and pressed record.

The lights were bright and the music was loud. Local band Bad River was belting out “Lonesome Loser,” by Little River Band, and I was taping it at The Room at Cedar Grove’s New Year’s Eve show. When tears started leaking out my eyes and down my cheek, I was stunned. Was it the two glasses of prosecco I consumed that made me so emotional? Absolutely not.

It was the music.

Hearing that 1979 hit grabbed my gut and released visceral emotions from a long-ago time. Much of the five years I lived in Honolulu I spent working at the top FM rock station of the islands and hosting rock & roll bands at the Blaisdell Auditorium. I worked hard, I had fun, and I was happy. It was those days to which I was transported.

That ‘ah-ha’ moment got me ruminating about my magnetic draw to Sussex County’s live local music venues.

It seems I have come full circle on my life journey.

As a child growing up in the Manhattan suburbs in the 1960s, I became a kind of tween groupie. In sixth grade my first live concert was front row center to see the Dave Clark Five. Why my parents let me out on a school night I’ll never know—but it was one of the best nights of my life.

I continued to be obsessed with the music and musicians of that era. On Saturday afternoons I’d walk along the Bronx River to the Westchester County Center where I got to chat with Bob Dylan, go backstage for a Byrds, We Five, and Who concert (Keith Moon gave me his drumsticks), and sit front row center to hear the Beach Boys.

In junior high and high school, my parents never realized that instead of spending Saturdays in downtown White Plains, I’d hop on the train to NYC and hang out hoping to catch a glimpse of one of the band members currently Letters 68 MAY 17, 2024

in town. I had the editor of Sixteen magazine on speed dial, who gave me the inside scoop. That’s how I knew the Rolling Stones were rehearsing for the Ed Sullivan Show in a warehouse on 10th Avenue. I broke into the building and hid under the seats listening to the group rehearse.

In college I lived within walking distance of a local dive bar where I got an education about the Blues listening to legends of the genre. I had unique listening venues on Capitol Hill— neighborhood homes that opened up for local as well as visiting musicians.

That’s how I knew the Rolling Stones were rehearsing for the Ed Sullivan Show in a warehouse on 10th Avenue.

I had no idea what my life would become when I moved to Delaware four years ago. I was in awe of the incredible musical talent in this tiny beach town.

I naturally gravitated to good food and good music.

When a band at the former Sydney’s in Milton played a James Brown tune, I was transported to a time decades ago to being at a party in my friend’s basement where I was falling in love with a man who could do a James Brown split. Reliving those nights made me smile. That initial memory triggered others. Soon I was recalling experiences I had long forgotten.

Music is powerful. American physician, philosopher, and author, Debasish Mridha, once said, “Music can heal the wounds which medicine cannot touch.” Nine Avramona, writing for CNN, observed, “[Music] can impact illness, depression, spending, productivity, and our perception of the world.” Lia Peralto,

in a 2021 blog post, noted that “Around the world music is used as a vehicle for social change and bringing communities together.”

How does music affect your mood?

Jennifer Fink, writing for Pfizer on the topic, explains: “The limbic system, which is involved in processing emotions and controlling memory, ‘lights’ up when our ears perceive music. The chills you feel when you hear a particularly moving piece of music may be the result of dopamine, a neurotransmitter that triggers sensations of pleasure and well-being.”

Music seems to make it easier for me to heal emotional wounds and give me another angle from which to view my past experiences. Often those memories that bubble up, triggered by a song, remind me of happy experiences I had stuffed away.

Music also forges a connection with people I hardly know in a place that is new to me. I can connect with musicians decades younger than me, and with musicians whom I admired when I was decades younger.

Through my love of music, I have even found I have something in common with Albert Einstein, who said, “If I were not a physicist I would probably be a musician. I often think in music. I live my daydreams in music. I see my life in terms of music.”▼ Pattie Cinelli is always searching for great venues to listen to live local music. Contact her: fitmiss44@aol.com.

MAY 17, 2024

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73 Letters

VACATION OR STAYCATION…

BY CHRISTOPHER MOORE

You Betta’ (Not) Work!

I

was built to work. In fact, many folks in my family have claimed this with pride. We are hard-wired with a mission to push far beyond the point of burning out. We then make everyone miserable, try to recover, and then do it again.

While this aspect of life has helped me thrive professionally, it has also come at a cost. In mid-life, I am now reconciling what I thought was true, versus what I have learned about the value of self-care, stepping away, and taking vacation. The road to this reckoning, though, has been a tricky one.

Growing up, my parents worked endlessly. The messaging my brother and I got was simple: laziness was not a good look. If you worked hard, you’d be respected and successful. Of course, this is classic Protestant Work Ethic BS, and it sounds logical until you learn it’s not so simple.

I was socialized into professional life, post-university, on the public health side of a Delaware hospital. I had an English degree and could write well, but otherwise was an outlier. This meant I had to work twice as hard to prove I fit in. It didn’t help that my colleagues were older, and were vocal about how they prioritized their career over most other things. They worked non-stop and sent and responded to emails at all hours and on weekends. They also worked on vacation. While it may not have been a spoken expectation, it was clear I had to do the same.

I spent those first years overworking to ensure my own success. Initially, I was a sex educator and I was OK with being overworked. Then I stepped into a leadership role, where I morphed into a corporate twit, with a Ken Doll haircut and a dozen versions of a blue suit. I was on email at 6:00 a.m. every day. I worked late and got minimal sleep. I was never rested or happy.

I excelled, though, and the payoff was more money and responsibility.

This made any kind of time off a performative stunt. My laptop went with Letters 74 MAY 17, 2024

me everywhere. For years, my friends and I would stay for a week in Wildwood, New Jersey; each morning, I would start my day on email, and maybe call into a meeting. I don’t know if working on vacation fed my ego, or if it kept the insecurities at bay? I do know I set a bad example. I also know I never enjoyed myself.

Fast forward a decade, to March 2020. I was leading a team of 60+ individuals through the uncertain terrain and potential trauma of a pandemic and remote work. While I would openly profess to others the importance of sticking to working hours and practicing self-care, I did neither for myself.

It took some time to recalibrate myself and find balance.

In fact, I did the opposite. I joyfully worked sun-up, to sun-down. To make matters worse, my personal life was chaotic. I was in a sloppy, sham of a relationship. My weight increased along with some simmering issues with anxiety.

This was exacerbated by a fondness for imbibing in all the ways that would help me retreat from reality. My life was on a dangerous loop, all in the name of being productive.

Fortunately, I experienced a moment of reckoning. I was on vacation in the Outer Banks. I was by the pool in our rented house and was miserable. I recall feeling distracted and cranky, and unable to be present. To make matters worse, my friends were joyful and relaxed. What was I doing wrong? As I responded to another email on my iPhone, the answer was—quite literally—staring me in the face. That’s when it all started to change.

It took some time to recalibrate myself and find balance. It started with admitting I had a problem: a compulsion to work.

In doing so, I admitted some other

problems. I dropped the corporate twit routine, the boyfriend, and the weight. In doing so, I started to be myself again.

I also took small steps to secure moments of peace. It started with allowing myself to say “no.” That was a tough one. Next, I worked on setting boundaries I knew I could maintain. This included not working, or talking about work, after hours, unless it was absolutely necessary. I also took work email off my phone. I started taking more time off and sticking to it.

These changes shocked the people around me, so I was transparent, explaining why I was taking these steps.

I wanted to be clear that if I could do this, so could they. I also started to use whatever power and privilege I had to ensure their time off was protected.

I have struggled the most being on vacation. But in February, for the first time in almost 20 years, I did not check work email while in Costa Rica. At first, it was unnerving. A week later, I felt like I had been set free.

Today, I am still learning, in a society still telling everyone to work hard in order to achieve some kind of dream. I would argue that living well should factor into it, too. The effort to undo a lot of these societal expectations has not been easy, and I suspect I will have to work on it for the rest of my life. However, I now know that it yields a very special gift: peace. ▼ Christopher Moore is Interim Executive Director of AIDS Delaware. He loves NPR, naughty jokes, and a man who lives in Toronto.

Email him at moore.cc@gmail.com.

MAY 17, 2024

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77 Letters

BE A SPORT

BY CONNIE FOX

They Came to Play

W

hat a fabulous weekend for sports! OK, a little cool for golf, but no rain!

Lots of smiles, lots of really good play, and lots of casual play for fun.

This year, Women’s FEST sports added a Par 3 tournament to the lineup, after having added bowling last year.

The sports options are growing at FEST, and there are discussions about yearround events. Watch this page!

More than 200 women participated in sports this year, with over 50 volunteers running the sports. A special thank you to sports coordinators: • Dawn Dupre and Barb Thompson: 18-hole Evie Simmons Memorial Golf Tournament • Mary Rossetini: Pickleball • Tama Viola and Mary Jo Tarallo: 9-hole Golf Scramble • Debbie Duran: Bowling • Rina Pelligrini: Cornhole • Sally McGovern: Par 3 • Cindy Sanders: Co-chair, Sports Coordinator And the winners are: Evie Simmons Memorial Golf Tournament • 1st place team: Becky Caprano, Dawn Dupre, Katie Heintz, and Lynn Sweeney • 2nd place team: Lori Guitson, Lisa Lekawa, Beth Petitte, and Anita Petitte • 3rd place team: Linda Kaufman, Ruth Laver, Ann Reed, and Judy Wetzel • Longest drive: Dawn Dupre • Two closest-to-the-pin winners: Carol Davidson and Sarah Smith Pickleball Played in 3 Flights (representing ability levels) A Flight Winners

• Gold: Kate Dougherty and Danielle Faucher • Silver: Maddie Cunningham and Mary Ellen James • Bronze: Carey Buck and Katie Rickards • Stars: Karen Beling and Diane Sweeney Letters 78 MAY 17, 2024

L-R: First Place Bowling; 9-hole Golf Scramble: Claire McCracken, Jen Leonard, Rina Pellegrini, Susan Shollenberger; Second place, 18-hole golf: Beth Petitte, Lori Gutson, Lisa Lakewa, Anita Petitte; Pickleball Flight A Winners; Cornhole winners: Lori Griggs, Susanne Furman, (coordinator Rina Pellegrini), Diane Sweeney, Janie Evans; Cornhole winners Karen Jorgenson, Diane Pasetieri; Pickleball Volunteers; Pickleball Flight B Winners; Pickleball Flight C Winners.

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BE A SPORT continued B Flight Winners

• Gold: Cheryl Guarna and Lindsay Trout • Silver: Dawn Dupre and Marybeth Holder • Bronze: Laura Ferris and Christine Lawson • Stars: Fran Leibovitz and Jane Souweine C Flight Winners

• Gold: Kim Keane and Georgette Shaloup • Silver: Sharon Denny and Marianne Sheridan • Bronze: Donna Dolce and Susan Peterson • Stars: Jennifer Grassi and Lisa Koenigsberg Nine Hole Golf Scramble • 1st place: Jen Leonard, Claire McCracken, Rina Pellegrini, and Susan Schollenberger • Last place (but great effort!): Andrea Hughes, Claire Ippoliti, Nan Martino and Angie Sparks

• Closest-to-the-pin: Jen Leonard • Longest drive: Jen Leonard Bowling • 1st place team: Chris Allison, Patty Lake, Jane Lawczynak, and Linda • 2nd place team: Alison Cormier, Amy Cormier, Lori Stahara, and Kristy Stahara • 3rd place team: Ginny Boyle, Giovani Cheidi, Phyllis Dillinger, and Kayla Erheridge • Last place (but great effort!): Gretchen Hartman, Linda Havilland, Audrey Scott, and Keith Scott • High scorer: Chris Allison Par 3 • 1st place team: Denise Kittle and Stacy Kochanek • 2nd place team: Kathleen Niles and Maryann Veitch • Two closest-to-the-pin winners: Carolyn Carmody and Maryann Veitch

Cornhole • 1st place team: Suzanne Furman and Lori Griggs • 2nd place team: Janie Evans and Diane Sweeney • 3rd place team: Karen Jorgenson and Diane Pasetieri Multi-sport Winners And let’s hear it for those women who played more than one sport! Too many to list here, but hats off to: • Dawn Dupre who medaled in 18-hole golf and in pickleball and • Diane Sweeney who medaled in cornhole and pickleball.

A Triple Crown And a special shout out to Jen Leonard who had the longest drive, closest-tothe-pin, and a 1st place team finish in 9-hole golf. ▼

MAY 17, 2024

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rehoboth guest 28-02_Layout 1 3/30/2018 2:13 PM Page 1

CAMP Library Chronicles

BY GLENN LASH

Autograph Hound

E

xcitement is building for the latest addition to CAMP’s library: Queering Rehoboth Beach by James Sears. The author used photos from CAMP’s archives and will sign a copy for our shelves at the June 2 book launch.

This got me to thinking…isn’t it thrilling to have an autographed book? Among our 2,050 titles, we have quite a few. In Women’s Lit you will find R. E. Bradshaw’s Sweet Carolina Girls and all of Marianne Martin’s work signed (donated by a true fan).

On our Transgender shelves there’s Rita B. Nelson’s Always Kristen.

Queer in America by that enfant terrible, Michelangelo Signorile, and How We Won the War for LGBTQ Equality by Washington Blade editor Kevin Naff are in History. Got a funInside covers and title ny bone? Check out pages are mentions of Judy Gold’s scribble inside a copy of Yes, I vacations and birthday CAN Say That which wishes and love. she gifted CAMP in August of 2022 while headlining SUNFESTIVAL. Also shelved in our Humor section are the complete works of our very own Fay Jacobs (Thanx Fay!!).

Near and dear to my heart is a signed first edition of The Kryptonite Kid by Joseph Torchia—full story in a future installment. In Memoirs there’s Lewes local R. Kevin Mallinson’s truly gripping work, Alarm in the Firehouse. And (pictured here) is Chasten Buttigieg with yours truly at the Lewes Public Library for the presentation of his second book, I Have Something to Tell You. Thrilling as all this seems, something—though perhaps less auspicious—always causes me to pause and smile: finding the names and personal inscriptions of the first owners of the books in our collection. Inside covers and title pages are mentions of vacations and birthday wishes and love. Even a simple moniker touches me. They signify that the book meant so much to the reader, they marked it forever as theirs. The connection is there and it is real and I am grateful to keep these works and all the others safe for you, dear reader. ▼ Letters 80 MAY 17, 2024

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81 Letters

Celebrity Interview

BY MICHAEL COOK

Gay Science—Rob Anderson’s New Book

F

rom his viral video series discussing beloved pop culture films and television, Rob Anderson is packaging the LGBTQIA culture alongside his beloved video series and releasing the vibrant and brilliantly hilarious book, Gay Science. Anderson manages to merge pieces of the community with actual science, conspiring to stir up some truly interesting conversations.

MICHAEL COOK: Your new book, Gay Science, is absolutely spectacular!

It’s vibrantly colorful, full of visuals, and chock-full of actual information.

ROB ANDERSON: Thank you so much! I tried to base it on real things as far as the science, but also culture. Each chapter is trying to get into what that part of the community is like generally and poke a little fun, but also back it up with science. It’s a lot—a lot of research went into it (laughs).

MC: Do you have a background in science and research or just a substantial knowledge of LGBTQIA everything?

RA: I don’t have a degree in science or anything, but I have always just loved

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science. I think that is where the video series initially came from, I just find it fun and interesting. For this book I had to research a lot more science and I really enjoyed it. I researched many fields and branches of science, and then for the gay culture for gay men. That was the easiest for me, because I live it.

I think tapping into different parts of the community that I am not part of; that took a lot of research. Reaching out to friends who are in those parts of the community, and learning how they joke about themselves.… It’s funny; with gay men and lesbians there is almost a culture where we love to poke fun at things and invent stereotypes of ourselves. Not just the stereotypes that bigots have come up with for us, but also ones we make up ourselves.

Whereas other parts of the community—like looking into bisexuals—they want those things, but there really aren’t those things that tie them together like gays and lesbians. There isn’t as much of a community, but they want one. So even puns or anything that they can grab onto and say, “This is so bisexual of us”; that’s in the book.

Then moving into other parts of the

Your career is following a very interesting trajectory, almost like a pinball machine… community that are really fighting for the right to exist and haven’t yet had an opportunity to poke fun at themselves like other communities have, but still have a great sense of humor. I wanted to include everyone in this book, but I made the sections about intersex and trans people about those who disagree with their existence, almost making fun of those people instead of those actual communities.

MC: What’s genius is that you invoked things like the works of Wendy Williams, and you turned them into a truly serious topic.

RA: It’s a very serious thing (laughs)!

She did great work understanding the gay wrist. She deserves to be appreciated and respected.

MC: One thing about Gay Science is that it’s definitely written for the LGBTQIA community, but absolutely anyone could pick it up and thoroughly enjoy it.

RA: It’s nice to hear you say that; that is what I was trying to do. I wanted it to feel inclusive, where people who are not part of the community could still laugh at these things. It’s not meant to make

…with gay men and lesbians there is almost a culture where we love to poke fun at things and invent stereotypes of ourselves. anyone feel isolated or that they are not part of the joke.

MC: Your career has truly blossomed online within the past couple years. Your video reviews of pop culture institutions like 7th Heaven and The Berenstain Bears, where you decipher the parts of these formerly wholesome American touchstones and show them to us through the lens of how devious they just might be, is truly remarkable.

RA: I have enjoyed revisiting things that I watched as a kid. 7th Heaven and The Berenstain Bears are two things in particular that I didn’t expect to be this way. It was a fun diversion when I was writing the Gay Science book to start rewatching them for fun, and then I thought, “people would enjoy this as content.” People need to know what’s going on here if they haven’t read it or seen it in a while (laughs)!

Now I get all of these requests to review all of these movies or shows that I either have never seen or haven’t seen in a while. I just watched Never Been Kissed and I put a video up about it; I hadn’t seen it since it came out in 1999.

I remembered it being a cute rom-com, but it is actually messed up (laughs).

The whole movie I was like, “This is the plot”? Josie Gellar (Drew Barrymore)

pretends to be a high schooler, goes to high school to write an exposé about high schoolers, and falls in love with a high school guy. Then her teacher falls in love with her, though he thinks she’s a student. Her brother—who’s in his mid-20s—just starts going to the school too, and dates a girl who is 16. I’m like “What the hell is going on?!” It’s actually outrageous, and I don’t know why I didn’t catch it initially.

MC: When people pick up Gay Science, what do you want them to get from it?

RA: I think the queer community is always under some sort of attack in some way by some people. Like, by politicians, and ignorant people who have nothing better to do and are creating problems because they don’t want to face problems that actually do exist. So, they divert the attention towards queer people. We know it, we see it; it’s so dumb, but it carries weight politically.

Because of that we are seen constantly in this light as a very serious group of people who are always having to fight, who are part of this story that is sad. We are funny, we have a great sense of humor, we joke about ourselves all the time. Every part of the queer community has gotten through trauma in our lives with humor. I want people to see that and know that we don’t take ourselves so seriously, even though we take the right to exist seriously.

With the video series, I have amassed a more diverse audience that is not just queer people. Straight people have seen the videos and they’re like “Are we allowed to laugh at this”? I think it’s surprising to them that we make fun of ourselves in this way. We do—and I don’t think we get a lot of queer comedy that allows for that; it’s always so serious. I think that is the biggest takeaway that I would love for someone to see or read. Not just straight people, but queer people; especially young queer people who are very serious.

MC: Your career is following a very interesting trajectory, almost like a pinball

machine where you are hitting a bunch of areas and it’s culminating in a career that is wonderfully diverse.

RA: That is a funny way of putting it (laughs)! But I think that’s a great analogy.

I am doing whatever is enjoyable for me and if someone else enjoys it and they like the content—whether it’s a show, this book, or the videos—I am just going to keep going forward from there.

I try not to think about my career or trajectory. Thinking about what this will set up for me in the future—I used to do that. I did improv in Chicago for seven or eight years and my whole mindset was that I would do improv, then become a writer on a late-night show, or SNL holds auditions and I’d try to get on SNL. But then, it’s like hold on! You’re limiting yourself from a whole career that doesn’t even exist yet. TikTok came out and once that started, I just let that type of thinking go. I’m just doing my thing; whatever happens, happens. Even if it’s just this, I am enjoying myself and I am really happy with my career. ▼ Michael Cook has been a part-time resident of Rehoboth Beach for over a decade. He is currently a contributor to Instinct Magazine, World of Wonder’s WOW Report, and South Florida Gay News.

Photos courtesy Fecks/Penguin Random House

Pre-Order Rob Anderson’s Gay Science here: amazon.com/GayScience-ScientificExaminationStereotypes/ dp/074408735X Follow Rob Anderson on Instagram: heartthrobanderson

MAY 17, 2024

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85 Letters

Greatness in the WNBA

Solution on Page 116 ACROSS 1 Leave marks on the back 5 Overhand stroke, for Mauresmo 10 Take advantage of International Male 14 Prefix with sphere 15 Family gathering spot 16 In the pink 17 Carbon compound 18 Lake Nasser dam 19 Shape of George Frenn’s track 20 Start of what every great team has to do 23 Garson of Hollywood 24 ___ Tin Tin (old TV dog) 25 Color for Katharine Lee Bates 28 Provided that 33 Part of GWM 34 Diana and Callisto painter 36 Shakespearean interjection 37 More of the quote 39 Retired Seatle Storm hoopster, and source of the quote 41 Direction away from NNE 42 Used rubbers 44 One of the Cone sisters 45 Certain Biblical scholar 47 Happy Days actor Williams 48 “___ out!” (cry by Pallone) 49 Scrabble companion of Q

52 End of the quote 58 Julia Morgan wings 59 Train making all stops 60 Muscle Marys pump it 62 Personal lubricant ingredient 63 It may slip over one’s head 64 General on Chinese menus 65 Tools for those who cut 66 Recesses for Rev. Michael Piazza 67 Film director Gus Van ___ DOWN 1 Nick Malgieri, for one 2 Musical Horne 3 Mine, to Rimbaud 4 Grandpa Walton portrayer 5 Sudden burst 6 Stroke with an upright stick 7 If everything goes wrong 8 The King and I setting 9 Gym bunnies do it to their pecs 10 Certain winner 11 Trying on clothes?

12 Pearl Buck character 13 Pound unrelentingly 21 Ticket abbr. on a Cherry Grove ferry 22 Taking it lying down 25 Group that won’t pose for nude photos

26 Home for Troy Perry 27 How to watch a video about fellatio?

29 River to the Seine 30 Tearoom Trade author Humphries 31 ___-surface missile 32 Roomy vehicle 34 Polo of The Fosters 35 Broadway lyricist Gershwin and others 38 Love objects 40 Friends with ___ 43 Wall materials 46 Witherspoon and others 47 South Park’s Big Gay, et al.

50 Give a hard time to 51 Lesbos and more 52 Some like them hot 53 Spicy stew 54 Bone in a limp wrist 55 Chicken pen 56 Bear of the night 57 Let out 61 “It’s ___ for Me to Say” (Mathis)

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87 Letters

The REAL DIRT

BY ERIC W. WAHL

Barking for Dogwood

T

he quintessential front yard tree must be the flowering dogwood.

However, few plants can rival the striking beauty and year-round appeal of the red twig dogwood (Cornus sericea).

With its vibrant red branches that shine against winter’s white backdrop and its delicate white flowers that herald the arrival of spring, this native North American shrub has earned its place as a favorite among gardeners and landscapers alike.

Red twig dogwood is native from Nova Scotia to Arkansas—including our area—and is commonly found in wetlands, along stream banks, and in other moist areas. Its range even spans from Alaska to northern Mexico. In the wild, it often forms thickets, providing valuable habitat for wildlife.

In gardens and landscapes, red twig dogwood is prized for its versatility and low maintenance. It thrives in a variety of soil types, from clay to sandy, as long as the soil is moist and well-drained. While it prefers full sun to partial shade, it can tolerate some shade, especially in hotter climates. Once established, it is relatively drought tolerant, although regular watering will promote healthier growth.

One of the most captivating features of red twig dogwood is its striking red branches, which provide a burst of color in the fall and winter landscape.

As the leaves drop in autumn, the bare branches take center stage, their vibrant red hue intensifying as the temperature drops. Against a backdrop of snow or evergreen trees, they create a stunning visual display that can brighten even the gloomiest of winter days.

Come spring, red twig dogwood puts on another show with the emergence of delicate white flowers. These flat-topped clusters of blooms, known as cymes, appear in late spring to early summer, attracting pollinators like bees and butterflies to the garden. As the flowers fade, they give way to clusters of white berries that ripen in late summer and Letters 88 MAY 17, 2024

persist into winter, providing food for birds and other wildlife.

Red twig dogwood’s year-round appeal and adaptability make it a popular choice for landscaping. Its dense, rounded form makes it ideal

With its vibrant red branches, delicate white flowers, and year-round appeal, red twig dogwood is a standout performer in the garden. for use as a specimen plant, where it can be showcased against a backdrop of evergreen shrubs or even a blank foundation wall. Planted in groups, it can form a striking mass of color, especially when combined with other plants with contrasting foliage or blooms. This mass of red stems can appear as dramatic as a fire burning in the landscape.

In addition to its aesthetic value, red twig dogwood also serves practical purposes in the landscape. Its dense growth and rooting habit make it an excellent choice for erosion control on slopes or along stream banks. Planted in rain gardens or bioswales, it can help filter pollutants from runoff while providing valuable shelter for wildlife.

While red twig dogwood is relatively low maintenance, there are a few key things to keep in mind to ensure its health and vigor. Regular watering, especially during periods of drought, will help keep the soil consistently moist. Mulching around the base of the plant can help retain moisture and suppress weeds. Pruning is another important aspect of red twig dogwood care. To maintain its vibrant color and encourage new growth, prune out older, less colorful stems in late winter or early spring. This will stimulate the growth of new stems, which will be more intensely colored.

With its vibrant red branches, delicate white flowers, and year-round appeal, red twig dogwood is a standout performer in the garden. Whether planted as a specimen, used for erosion control, or incorporated into a mixed border, this versatile shrub adds beauty and interest to any landscape. Easy to care for and adaptable to a variety of growing conditions, red twig dogwood is a must-have plant for gardeners looking to add color and charm to their outdoor spaces. Plant a few these dogwoods and you’ll have your neighbors barking their praise.

Be safe, and let’s garden together! ▼ Eric W. Wahl is Landscape Architect at Pennoni Associates, and President of the Delaware Native Plant Society.

MAY 17, 2024

89 Letters

arts+entertainment

BY LESLIE SINCLAIR

SPOTLIGHT ON THE

arts

CAMP Rehoboth Puts Art at the Heart of Our Community

FEST ART 2024! Opening A Success

T

IMAGES

Top: Fields of Gold (detail)

by Amy B. Nestor Bottom: Into Dawn’s Early Light

by Sharon Denny

he FEST ART 2024! April 26 opening reception, attended by hundreds, was a tremendous success. There was a buzz of excitement in the air and an atmosphere of creativity and inclusivity. It was an afternoon of celebration, inspiration, and empowerment—a testament to the creativity, talent, and resilience of women in the arts.

Each piece in the exhibition tells a unique story and reflects the individuality of its creator. Three exhibiting artists who also attended the reception took the time to share about themselves, their creative process, and artistic vision. All three are looking forward to returning to CAMP Rehoboth and the FEST ART exhibition next year.

Lorraine Dey is not only an artist, but also an illustrator of children’s books, having illustrated over 40 published books since 2010. Lorraine is “so honored to not only have my painting chosen for inclusion into FEST ART 2024!, but also that it was purchased by CAMP Rehoboth Board President, Wes Combs.”

She enjoys and plans to continue striving to paint fine art landscapes and seascapes that capture outstanding moments in nature.

Amy B. Nestor is a visionary photographer renowned for the captivating world of textured images. Texture for Amy “isn’t merely a visual element—it’s a language.”

Through meticulous composition and a masterful command of lighting, Amy elevates photography to an art form that engages the senses. Each image, she says, “becomes a tactile experience,

inviting the viewer to not only see but to feel the subtle nuances embedded within the textures.”

Carol Bell is very dedicated to the environment, including what comes from the farm, the forest, and the ocean.

“When I photograph, be it still life or landscape, I try to reflect the earthly beauty of my surroundings. I feel blessed to wake up every day and experience nature in all its forms,” says Carol. “We are so lucky.”

If you have not yet had the opportunity to view FEST ART 2024!, there is good news—the exhibition is on display through May 31. Stop by the CAMP Rehoboth Community Center Gallery Monday through Friday, 10:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m.

Be sure to mark your calendars as the season continues with the following exciting exhibitions.

Pride Unbound

June 1-27, Reception: June 8, 2-4 p.m.

In June we celebrate LGBTQ+ voices in art in Pride Unbound, where pertinent themes are explored, and LGBTQ+ and queer artists share their talent, inviting visitors to engage in the rich tapestry of queer identity, history, and experience.

Making the Cut

June 29-July 31, Reception: July 12, 5-7 p.m.

In July, you will have a chance to learn about a uniquely American art form, with historic ties to the Rehoboth Art League and a Provincetown, Massachusetts art colony, when the Delaware White-Line Woodcut Guild shares their work in Making the Cut. Watch for more. ▼

This program is supported, in part, by a grant from the Delaware Division of the Arts, a state agency, in partnership with the National Endowment for the Arts. The Division promotes Delaware arts events on DelawareScene.com.

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MAY 17, 2024

arts+entertainment

BY JOE GFALLER

Our Cultural Coast

B

eing a relatively new transplant to this beautiful corner of the country, it’s been deeply rewarding to see what a dynamic, unique, and truly special arts community we have here along the Delaware beaches.

A lot of the branding for our region calls us “The Culinary Coast.” But I’d like to argue that we equally deserve the moniker of “The Cultural Coast,” as arts and culture are thriving here in ways that aren’t just good for our region, but also are unique for our nation.

In much of the country, the pandemic and its aftershocks had a crippling effect on the performing arts. Major institutions like the Mark Taper Forum in LA and Lookingglass Theatre in Chicago took a full year hiatus from producing to regroup last year. Others, like Book-It Repertory in Seattle or Bay Area Children’s Theater in California, closed completely. And many companies staying the course have had to drain endowments to manage deficits (to the tune of $40M this year at the Metropolitan Opera) or have cut back significantly on programming to manage expenses (at Lyric Opera of Chicago, there will be only 40 performances across six titles in their entire next season—half the volume of offerings from a decade ago).

Leaders across these organizations tell variations of the same story.

Audiences have not returned to their pre-pandemic levels, and as audiences decline, so too does funding. It’s a vicious cycle. A recent national survey conducted by the national service organization for professional theaters showed that 40 percent of theaters in America had seen subscribership decline by 30 percent or more and that 50 percent of theaters had seen a decline in single ticket sales of between 10 and 30 percent. (Another 25 percent of theaters showed even steeper declines in single tickets.)

We should all take enormous pride in the fact that that is not the case here in coastal Delaware. Far from it.

Here, we see the arts growing in powerful ways. In part, that is because arts organizations here have a special relationship with our community—helping the arts thrive even in the face of these national trends. I talked to a few other wonderful arts leaders in our region to get their perspectives on what makes our community such a fertile environment to connect with the arts.

This kind of growth isn’t just good for our arts institutions and for our audiences in coastal Delaware; it’s also good for the artists who call our region home.

Carol Dennis, the Executive Director at Coastal Concerts, shared something that many in the arts see and feel: “Many in our area have come from large cities to retire here. They are sophisticated in the arts and eager to discover what our region has to offer. They are amazed at the world class artists they can see at such reasonable prices.”

And of course, it’s not just retirees who are newly calling our region home. Helen Chamberlin, the Executive Director at the Rehoboth Beach Film

Society, shared the same enthusiasm for those newly arriving. “The confluence of people are expecting to find arts and culture in our former sleepy little seaside town. The opportunity is to rise to meet the challenges of now being the eighth fastest-growing county in the US.” This thoughtful responsiveness to the needs of our community is reflected in the programming you’ll see across the region each year—and especially in the summer, as our shores teem with visitors. Fred Munzert, Director of the Milton Theatre, reflected, “As the population in our region grows rapidly, so do their cultural interests and demands. At the Milton Theatre, we take great care to listen to the needs and preferences of our local community, while preserving the identity that has kept our audiences loyal to us.”

Across the region, this alchemy of programming guided by the needs and interests of our community is paying off to build a vibrant and healthy range of offerings. At Clear Space Theatre Company, for instance, nearly every performance since the middle of October has been sold out and, in a far cry from national trends, subscribership has grown 46 percent between 2023 and 2024.

This kind of growth isn’t just good for our arts institutions and for our audiences in coastal Delaware; it’s also good for the artists who call our region home. In the months to come, I’ll look forward to introducing you to some of the amazing creators and visionaries who are our neighbors right here in coastal Delaware. ▼ Leslie Sinclair is a member of the Delaware State Arts Council and a passionate leader of CAMP Rehoboth’s visual arts programs.

Joe Gfaller is Managing Director of Clear Space Theatre.

Photo:Stefano Sstacchini on Unsplash

MAY 17, 2024

91 Letters

arts+entertainment

by Terri Schlichenmeyer

BOOKED SOLID Here We Go Again

by Alison Cochrun ©2024, Atria, $17.99, 368 pages

They had nothing in common at all, except Joseph Delgado.

He’d been their English teacher years ago, and they both followed in his footsteps. He kept them from going stir-crazy in their small Oregon town. He was friend, father figure, and supporter for each of them when they separately came to understand that they were lesbians.

They loved Joe. They’d do anything for him.

Which is why he had one favor to ask….

With a recent diagnosis of incurable cancer, Joe didn’t want to die surrounded by hospital walls. Would Logan and Rosemary drive him and his dog to Maine, to a cabin he owned? Would they spend time crammed side-by-side in a used van with a gay logo, keeping Joe alive, coast-to-coast?

Could they do it without screaming the whole way?

Can you avoid laughing at this convoluted, but very funny story? Highly unlikely, because Here We Go Again takes every nightmare you’ve ever had of busted friendship, bad vacations, and long-lost love, and it makes them hilarious.

It’s not the story that does it, though. The story’s a bit too long and it can drag, but author Alison Cochrun’s characters are perfectly done, each one of them. Logan is profane in all the right ways and yes, she’s a jerk—but an appealing one. Rosemary is too prim, too proper, too straightlaced, but Cochrun lets her be unlaced in a steamy passage that’s not misplaced. You’ll love how this story moves along (although sometimes slowly!) and you’ll love how it ends.

If you’ve ever endured a cross-country trip stuffed in the back seat of a hot car for miles and miles, sharing a seat with an abrasive sibling, this is your book. Here We Go Again is a solid vacation read. ▼

Can you do me a solid?

Just one little favor, a quick errand, it won’t take long. You can do it next time you’re out, in fact. Consider it your good deed for the day if it makes you feel better.

A mitzvah. An indulgence to a fellow human. As in the new novel, Here We Go Again by Alison Cochrun, think of it as a life-changing thing.

She couldn’t remember the woman’s first name.

Did Logan Maletis really ever know it? Everybody at her job—administration, students, other teachers—called everyone else by their last name so the colleague she’d been hooking up with for weeks was just “Schaffer.” Whatever, Logan didn’t care, and she wasn’t cold-hearted but when Savannah broke up with her in public, she did wonder if maybe, possibly, the awful names she called Logan were fair or true.

Rosemary Hale would’ve agreed with every single last one of those nasty names.

Once, she and Logan were BBFs but after a not-so-little incident happened the summer they were 14, she hated Logan with a white-hot passion. Every time Rosemary ran into Logan at school, she regretted that they worked in the same place. Seeing her old nemesis, even just once in a while, was an irritation she could barely stand.

C R E A T

Cool It! Welcome to the Dog Days Seasons in The Sun

Local Heroes RB Candidate Forum (We Could Be) Heroes I N G

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P O S I T

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C R E A T I N G

July 26, 2019 Volume 29, Number 10 camprehoboth.com

ainment That’s Entert for Play A Passion Tradition Taking Dance for a Twirl

C R

Terri Schlichenmeyer’s second book, The Book of Facts and Trivia: American History, came out in January 2024.

I N G E A T

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2019 June 28, er 8 29, Numb Volume th.com camprehobo

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August 9, 2019 Volume 29, Number 11 camprehoboth.com

Advertising in Letters from CAMP Rehoboth pays off.

CALL TRICIA MASSELLA AT 302-227-5620 or email tricia@camprehoboth.com for more information!

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MAY 17, 2024

93 Letters

View Point

BY RICHARD J. ROSENDALL

Dancing in Our Truth; Respecting Others’ Braving the Discomfort of a Conversation

N

ot only have Trump and his mob assaulted the rule of law.

They have also trampled commonly accepted norms. We will not restore them unless we uphold them, including by making politicians who violate them pay the consequences on Election Day. We also need to raise our expectations of students.

If your college education never makes you uncomfortable, you are doing it wrong. If a culture of “triggering” leads you to claim your rights are violated every time your preconceptions are challenged, you are using fake fragility to hide from a world that you need to engage with for your own sake and that of others.

The reality of our diversity is not erased by hiding from it.

Since the deadly terrorist attack against Israel by Hamas on October 7, I have defended the longstanding American policy of embracing a twostate solution in which the rights of both Israelis and Palestinians to their own free and independent states are respected.

Since then, I have been called both a Jew hater and a defender of genocide by people on different sides. No. George Packer writes in the Atlantic that elite universities have “trained pro-Palestinian students to believe that, on the oppressor-oppressed axis, Jews are white and therefore dominant, not ‘marginalized,’ while Israel is a settler-colonialist state and therefore illegitimate. They’ve trained pro-Israel students to believe that unwelcome and even offensive speech makes them so unsafe that they should stay away from campus. What the universities haven’t done is train their students to talk with one another.”

How do we advance justice by making nonnegotiable demands? We cannot insulate ourselves from messy reality by hiding inside ideological bubbles.

When university administrators Letters 94

MAY 17, 2024

summon police to remove an illegal encampment, and the cops beat the crap out of nonviolent students and faculty, who are the criminals? When a university president is trapped between the demands of liberal faculty and those of demagogic congressional Republicans, what chance is there of finding a solution? Holding one another hostage is not governance.

I want a country in which people channel their anger productively—a country in which politicians get elected by appealing to the best in us, not the worst.

We have to do better than saying “We don’t want two states, we want it all!” on one side and “Expel them! Fire them! Cancel their funding!” on the other.

Do we aspire to be a nation of Marjorie Taylor Greenes?

We need to pull ourselves together, individually and collectively. We need to have the difficult conversations and find the small patches of common ground from which vibrant, sturdy communities and nations are built.

Brutal police must be held responsible. At the same time, there is responsibility on the part of protesters who deliberately use the most inflammatory rhetoric to provoke an overreaction that helps the protesters’ recruitment efforts. Advancing justice requires work, not just attention-getting.

I want a country where people resolve their differences without reflexively resorting to violence and authoritarianism. I want a country where people do not regard anything short of

total agreement with everything they want as a betrayal. I want a country not riven by tribalism; a country where one political party does not insist on airbrushing away all the unpleasant parts of our history.

For that matter, I want a country with people smart enough to know that children are less fragile than they imagine, and that censoring the nasty bits of our past does not make them nor their enduring effects go away. I want a country in which people channel their anger productively—a country in which politicians get elected by appealing to the best in us, not the worst. Of our two leading presidential candidates, is there any question that Joe Biden is the better model of that?

I want an America in which people do not pretend to be threatened when some children have (say) one father they call Papa and another they call Daddy. The burden is not only on straight cisgender people to “get over it.” It is also on us to be ourselves openly, quietly, and unashamedly.

Thus, I was happy to see Politico reporter Eugene Daniels sitting next to Vice President Kamala Harris on April 27 at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. He posted on social media on National Coming Out Day last October about having learned “to dance in my truth every day.”

There Eugene was on the dais, being his poised and stylish self, which reminded me of how many African Americans dressed for the Black Panther premiere in 2018. In June he will become the first Black openly gay president of the White House Correspondents’ Association. Cheers! ▼ Richard J. Rosendall is a writer and activist at rrosendall@me.com.

MAY 17, 2024

95 Letters

ENTERTAINMENT SCHEDULE

BORN THIS WAY PRIDE Drag Show June 7 - 8PM

ABBAFAB Tribute To ABBA June 8 - 2PM & 8PM

QUAYSIDE @NITE

MILTON PRIDE FEST 2024

MAY 16 - SEPT 19

SAT - STARTS 4PM

@ Quayside

OUTDOOR SUMMER CONCERT SERIES 2024 SIMPLY STREISAND EARTH TO MARS with Carla Del Villaggio Bruno Mars Experience June 16 - 7:30PM June 20 - 8PM

THURSDAY’S ALL SUMMER FOOD TRUCKS EVERY WEEK!

JUNE 8

Live music, vendors, food trucks, and more!

MORE EVENTS

JUNE 6 - LOWER CASE BLUES: Quayside@Nite MAY 23 - HOT SAUCE BAND: Quayside@Nite MAY 23 - THE MIDNIGHT ROCK SHOW: 70's FM Hits JUNE 6 - SUEDE: Pop/Jazz/Blue Vocalist MAY 24 - AWAKEN: YES Tribute JUNE 9 - 33 1/3 LIVE’S KILLER QUEEN EXPERIENCE: Queen Tribute MAY 25 - SINATRA’S “THAT’S LIFE”: With Tony Sands JUNE 12 - DEANNA FITZPATRICK: Psychic Medium MAY 26 - BEST SHOT: Pat Benatar Tribute JUNE 13 - CHARLIE & THE COOLTONES: Quayside@Nite MAY 29 - ZACH NUGENT’S DEAD SET: Grateful Dead Tribute JUNE 13 - THURSTON HOWELL BAND - Yacht Rock Spectacular MAY 30 - JUDY SINGS THE BLUES: Quayside@Nite JUNE 14 - FLYING IVORIES: Dueling Pianos MAY 30 - ABACAB: Genesis Tribute JUNE 15 - THE McCARTNEY EXPERIENCE: Paul McCartney Tribute MAY 31 - ATOMIC LIGHT ORCHESTRA: ELO Tribute JUNE 1 - SWEARINGEN & KELLI: Music Of Simon & Garfunkel JUNE 19 - TRIBUTE TO ELTON JOHN: Featuring Lee Alverson JUNE 20 - CONNOR FILICKO’S BOOGIE BONES: Quayside@Nite JUNE 2 - SHORTS FEST FILM FESTIVAL

For more information on tickets, show details, and full events calendar go to:

www.MILTONTHEATRE.com

302.684.3038 | 110 Union St. Milton, DE Letters 96

MAY 17, 2024

Experts in coastal comfort.

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MAY 17, 2024

97 Letters

Deep Inside Hollywood

BY ROMEO SAN VICENTE

Outstanding: A Comedy Revolution hits Netflix for Pride

N

Queer Gets the Luca Guadagnino Treatment with Daniel Craig

I

conic Beat Generation author William S. Burroughs, whose novel Naked Lunch turned millions of young people into fans of experimental fiction, wrote a book called Queer in the early 1950s. Then it sat, waiting to be published, for 30-plus more years. And though Lunch got a film adaptation from David Cronenberg in the ’90s, Queer had to wait its turn once again. Now Luca Guadagnino, whose horny tennis love triangle Challengers is going to make everyone who watches it bisexual, has taken the Burroughs short novel and cast Daniel Craig in the lead of an intergenerational romance. The former James Bond stars as a man in Mexico City in the 1940s who becomes infatuated with a younger man played by Love, Simon actor Drew Starkey. Co-starring British Academy Award nominee Lesley Manville (Phantom Thread), Wes Anderson regular Jason Schwartzman, and Henry Zaga (The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare), Queer is expected to hit international film festivals later this year for a probable 2025 theatrical release. Bring your Daddy. ▼ Photo credit Metro Goldwyn Mayer Pictures

The Liza Minnelli Documentary Is Coming to Tribeca

L

iza Minnelli is a 78-year-old living legend and heir to the queer icon status earned by her mother, Judy Garland, as well as that of her father, Meet Me in St. Louis director Vincente Minnelli. Therefore, it’s well past time for the Academy Award-winning actress/singer/dancer/force of nature to get the documentary treatment she deserves and it arrives in a package called LIZA: A Truly Terrific Absolutely True Story, from filmmaker Bruce David Klein.

Spanning Minnelli’s long career and her connections to her family (sister Lorna Luft appears in the film) and show business mentors, the documentary features friends and admirers—some in archival footage—like Mia Farrow, Ben Vereen, Chita Rivera, and Joel Grey. It’s certain to turn up in theaters and streaming after its bow at the Tribeca Film Festival in June. And if you’re young and not quite sure why you know who she is, here’s your chance to see her light up the screen. After you’ve finished watching Cabaret, of course. ▼

Romeo San Vicente wouldn’t be caught dead sitting alone in his room.

Letters 98

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ot so long ago if you were a queer stand-up comic, you were more likely to be closeted than out and proud. But that was then, and today queer comedians are everywhere, no longer forced to keep quiet. Enter Outstanding: A Comedy Revolution, from writer-director Page Hurwitz, a documentary for Netflix that features a roster of comedy stars too long to list here, but includes Tig Notaro, Wanda Sykes, Suzy Izzard, Lily Tomlin, Todd Glass, Sandra Bernhard, Fortune Feimster, Hannah Gadsby, Rosie O’Donnell, Margaret Cho, Bob the Drag Queen, Trixie Mattel, and Guy Branum to name a few handfuls. The film charts the rise of LGBTQ+ visibility that went hand-in-hand with a gradually more open playing field in the world of comedy, where queer people have always existed but whose best punchlines were too often straightwashed. The doc drops on June 18, so you can celebrate Pride on your couch and laugh off that sunburn you got at the parade. ▼

Emilia Perez—The Trans Musical Crime Comedy You’ve Been Waiting For

A

cclaimed French filmmaker Jacques Audiard—the man behind arthouse hits The Beat That My Heart Skipped, A Prophet, and the Cannes Film Festival’s Palme d’Or-winning Dheepan—is headed back to that same prestige fest this May with a new film, the musical crime-comedy Emilia Perez. It’s got some big names attached, stars like Selena Gomez, Zoe Saldaña, and Edgar Ramírez. But its lead, Spanish trans actress Karla Sofia Gascón, will be new to audiences who haven’t watched recent Spanish-language telenovelas, some of which she appeared in prior to her public transition. Gascón stars in the title role as the leader of a drug cartel who begins gender transition, singing all the way, supported by pop star Gomez, with an original score of songs from French musician Camille Dalmais. Sound intriguing? Well, if you can’t make it over to France, it should wind up in North American arthouses in the not-too-distant future. ▼

MAY 17, 2024

99 Letters

Letters 100

MAY 17, 2024

Advisor to philanthropists.

Trusted partner and resource to professional advisors.

“The cost of education has gotten to the point that people with means really ought to look at how they can support people. I really do hope my scholarship fund at the DCF encourages others to think about doing the same.”

Bob Martz, Wilmington, Bob Martz Scholarship Fund

At the Delaware Community Foundation, we help donors and their professional advisors make savvy decisions about charitable giving to maximize tax advantages and community impact.

DCF President & CEO Stuart Comstock-Gay with donor Bob Martz

To learn more, contact Mike DiPaolo, vice president for Southern Delaware, at mdipaolo@delcf.org or 302.335.6933.

delcf.org/daf MAY 17, 2024

101 Letters

BUTTON UP!

BY NANCY SAKADUSKI

Button, Button, Who’s Got the Button?

F

rom green carnations, Sapphic violets, handkerchief codes, and earring signals to pink triangles, lavender rhinoceroses, and increasingly elaborate rainbow flags, the history of queer culture is awash in signs, symbols, and badges. Some were worn to make connections or identify allies, others to show pride or champion change. And tragically, some were worn involuntarily, for the purposes of persecution and violence.

In modern times, pin buttons have provided a means of individual expression in LGBTQ+ culture.

There are several noteworthy button collections. The Mazer Lesbian Archives has 21 boxes of them. Paud Hegarty, who ran the LGBT+ bookshop Gay’s the Word during the 1980s and ’90s, amassed a collection that became known as Paud’s Pins. The Lesbian Herstory Archives has 2,286 buttons, spanning 1973 to present.

From these collections, I’ve selected a sampling of button messages to demonstrate their range, creativity, and humor.

IDENTITY

Some buttons are direct: Faggot, Lezzie, Gay, Butch, Amazon (presumably not the delivery service), and Non Breeder.

Others are more creative: Better Gay than Grumpy, Dorothy’s Best Friend, Encourage Homosexualities, I’m Not Gay But My Lover Is, Please Don’t Feed or Tease the Straight People, 69 With Your Own Kind, Are We Over the Rainbow Yet?, I Can’t Even Think Straight, You’re Damn Straight I’m Gay, I’m a Good Fairy, and Come Out, Come Out, Whoever You Are. Woman-to-woman messages are abundant: So Many Women So Little Nerve, Vagina Friendly, Viva la Vulva!, Clit Power, Leaping Lesbian, Real Women Don’t Eat Men!, Ask Not What a Lesbian Can Do for You But What You Can Do For a Lesbian, and my personal favorite, Agente de Lesbiennage.

There is a symphony of buttons on the theme of dykes: Veggie Dyke, Southern Dyke, European Dyke, Vanilla Dyke, Midwest Dyke, Dykes Against Nukes, Letters 102

MAY 17, 2024

Strong Dyke, Warm Fuzzy Dyke, Generic Dyke, Little Dyke, Big Dyke Energy, Dyke Drama, Available Dyke, City Dyke, Preppy Dyke, Country Dyke, Dyke of Color, Dyke to Watch Out For, Dyke-otomy, I Like Dykes, and Thank God I’m a Dyke.

In modern times, pin buttons have provided a means of individual expression in LGBTQ+ culture.

POLITICAL/ACTIVIST

There are many buttons relating to AIDS: I Was Arrested Fighting AIDS, Fight AIDS Not People With AIDS, Stop AIDS! Fight Back! Act Up!, Frisky Can Be Risky. Get the Facts!, Action = Life, Stay Healthy! Play Safe!, and Silence = Death.

Some relate to specific events or time periods: Remember Matthew, Remember Stonewall, Doing My Part to Piss Off the Religious Right, Help the Police—Beat Yourself Up, Freaking Fag Revolutionary, Nuke a Gay Whale for Christ, Don’t Agonize—Organize, Ronald Reagan is Definitely Not a Lesbian, and If We Can Send One Man To the Moon, Why Not Send All of Them?.

Quite a few buttons attempt to enlighten others: There Are More of Us Than You Think, One in 10 of You May Be One Of Us, We Are Not Just Good Friends, Some of Your Best Friends Are Gay, It’s Not Just a Phase Week, Lesbian Visibility is Lesbian Survival, Biology is Not Destiny, I’m One Too, You Have Just Been Patronized by a Gay American, and Average American Family: Mom, Mom, 2.5 Cats.

WORDPLAY

Many button slogans involve word play, particularly double entendres: Be Healthy Eat Your Honey, We Don’t Need Balls to Play, Happy Gays Are Here Again, Go Homos, I Got Kicked Out of Girl Scouts for Eating a Brownie, Never in a Million Queers Will There Be Another You, Men: Use Condoms or Beat It, Lesbians Unite in Armed Snuggle, Sodom Today—Gomorrah the World!, It’s a Bitch Being Butch, Safer Sex—Keep It Up!, Love is a Many-Gendered Thing, Oral Majority, I Snatch Kisses and Vice Versa, Lick Bush in ‘88, and for seasonal use: Ho Ho Homosexual.

INEXPLICABLE, ODDLY SPECIFIC, OR JUST PLAIN GREAT

Some buttons are in a category of their own: Dip Me in Maple Syrup And Throw Me To the Lesbians, Nice Bum—Shame About the Moustache, Female By Birth...

Lesbian By Grace And if You Happen to See Grace Tell Her I Say Hi, I’d Rather Be a Fairy Than a Troll, Clitzpah, My Unicorn Is Lesbian—Is Yours?, I’d Walk a Million Miles For One of Your Smiles—And I’d Walk Even Farther For That Thing You Do With Your Tongue, and My Mother Made Me a Lesbian. If I Send Her Some Yarn, Will She Make Me One Too? Others provoke curiosity: Vampire Lesbians of Sodom, Cervix Cervices: Gynecological Self-Help Clinics of America, Victoria Woodhull Marching Band, Kinky is Using a Feather—Perverted is Using the Whole Chicken, Codependent Lesbian Space Alien, and Sorry I Missed Church. I Was Busy Practicing Witchcraft & Becoming a Lesbian.

And finally, a button especially for seniors: I’m Not Just Out of the Closet...I’m in the Living Room with My Feet Propped Up! ▼ Nancy Sakaduski is an award-winning writer and editor who owns Cat & Mouse Press in Lewes, Delaware.

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JESSIE HAYES

AGENT

AGENT

AGENT

PATRICK SOMMER AGENT

(202) 436-1268

(484) 472-3500

(267) 226-5161

(484) 553-6288

KMULDOON@MCWB.COM

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JHAYES@MCWB.COM

PSOMMER@MCWB.COM

39 Baltimore Ave Suite 1 Rehoboth Beach

All material presented herein is intended for information purposes only. While this information is believed to be correct, it is represented subject to errors, omissions, changes or withdrawal without notice. If your property is currently listed with a real estate broker, please disregard this offer. It is not to solicit the offerings of other real estate brokers. We cooperate with them fully.

MAY 17, 2024

103 Letters

SCENES FROM REHOBOTH BEACH

1

2 (Continued from page 67) THIS PAGE (left to right) 1) at CAMP Rehoboth Women's FEST Expo: Patricia Sullivan, Liz Bradbury, Jinny Green, Joyce Hastings, Lynn Ames, Denise Paige, Graeme Davis, Barb Clipper, Hope Vella; 2) at CAMP Rehoboth Women's FEST Singles Tea Dance at Aqua: Susan Gragg, Polly Donaldson, Cheryl Cushine, Yolanda Berry, Mary Flanagan, Elizabeth Sposato, Jackie McWilliams, Lee Melms, Yvonne Fallon, Chris Durr, Tama Viola, Joanie Murphy, Laura Cannistraci, Lisa Cannistraci, Patty Layton, Kate Kortsch, Jodi Lyons, Pamela Brown, Cindy Johnson OPPOSITE PAGE: 3) at Fay Jacobs Scholarship Fundraiser: David Garrett, DE State Rep. Pete Schwartzkopf, Brenda Dunn, Karen Anderson, Fay Jacobs, Kim Leisey, Leslie Ledogar, Polly Donaldson, Wes Combs, Ruth Koetzin, Holly Lane, Diane Scobey, Jennifer Rubenstein, Louisa Watrel, Jane Blue; 4) at RB Main Street Gumbo Crawl: Ken Boswell, Mit Patel (Dos Locos), Katherine Mavequill, Yolanda Pineda (Mariachi), Sam Ferguson, Ella Evanc (Freddie's Rehoboth), Tom Johnson, Betsi Fakler (Blackwell at the Beach), Gene Dvornick, Marion Jones (Downtown Blues), Alyssa Mahle, Bob Suppies (The Pines), Debbie Smallwood, Chip Hearn (Somewhere), Randy Haney, Kelly Barber, Tim Ragan, Max Dick, Tony Burns (Blue Moon—Gumbo Crawl Winner).

(More CAMPshots page 106) Letters 104

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105 Letters

SCENES FROM REHOBOTH BEACH

1

2 (Continued from page 105) THIS PAGE (left to right) 1) at RB Bears Happy Hour at Dos Locos: Jeff Donovan, David O’Leary, Craig Stewart, Jon Worthington, Colin Dawkins, Mark Robinson, Joe Santone, Liz Lokhard, Kim Lokhard; 2) at Big Fish: RB Commisioner Patrick Gossett, DE Lt. Gov. Bethany HallLong, Ted Becker, Marty Rendon, Leslie Ledogar, Mikki Snyder-Hall, Ron Chaney, Betsy Chaney, Claire Snyder-Hall, Annette Stelhorne, Howard Menaker, Rick Stelhorne; 3) at Peninsula Gallery: Molly King, Ken Norman.

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OPPOSITE PAGE: 4) at Purple Parrot: Deborah Dean, Patrick Lawler, Rick Clay, Karen Clay, George Stakias, Chuck McSweeney, Michael Skinner, Charles Davison, Greg Golden, John Mank, Daphane Golden, 5) at Aqua: Tim Colfer, Tom Durso, Michael Craig, Leon Vignes, Rich Barnett, Jonathan Lockerby; 6) at Café Azafran: David Engle, Billy Toner, Evan Bolland; 7) at Rehoboth Art League: Lulia Pons, Sara Ganter, Benno Pons, Kathleen O’Connor, Michael Collins, Carol Ellison; 8) at The Pines: Alynda Ponder, Louann Pope; 9) at Diego’s: Emily Paternoster, Monica Parr, Pamela Stanley, Bryan Hecksher. ▼

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107 Letters

YOU SAY TURTLE; I SAY TORTOISE

BY TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

Slow—But Mighty

Y

ou’d think it might be convenient.

Walking around with a Panzer tank strapped to your body might be a really handy thing, right? Hit by a car, no problem. Stuck in a crowd, pfft, you got that.

Who wins a fight with a random tank on a random street?

Uh, nobody. You can clearly see the benefits—but talk with a turtle before heading to the military supply store.

Though it might look like an imposition to have to carry a shell around all day, the turtle likely doesn’t notice because he’s born with that shell around his body; in fact, the shell is actually part of his skeletal system. The top part, the carapace, consists of bone and is fused to the creature’s spine on the underside. The bottom part, the plastron, consists of ribs and sternum. All this means, despite what you’ve seen on Saturday morning cartoons, is that the turtle can’t simply crawl out of his shell for any reason.

This is true of all 350-plus turtle species, at least one of which is found on every continent except Antarctica, in fresh water and salt water. Tortoises and terrapins are included in this mix because they are both just Chelonians by different common names.

Either way, if you met one, it’s nice to know which group he might fall under— land turtle or water turtle.

All tortoises are land turtles, and they include the tiny box turtles you find in pet stores, as well as the giant Galapagos turtles. The easiest way to determine a tortoise is that tortoise feet are not webbed.

They’re clubby and round, perfect for walking on land but they would never fit in a pair of Louboutins.

Aquatic turtles live most of their lives in the water, but some species will come onto land occasionally, to lay eggs in the sand or to catch a few rays. Sea turtles are sleek, with long flippers, webbed feet, and a shell that’s built for cruising. Freshwater turtles are also built for water—including boggy areas, marshes, ponds, rivers, lakes, and rivers—but with log- or Letters 108

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…despite what you’ve seen on Saturday morning cartoons, the turtle can’t simply crawl out of his shell for any reason. rock-basking on their to-do list, especially if the weather’s nice. If it’s not, freshwater turtles can’t fly to Boca for the winter; instead, they dig into the mud and do a kind of hibernation thing.

No matter what kind of Chelonian you’re talking about, all Mama turtles lay their eggs on land, and most of them are pretty fussy about where they do it.

In most cases, they make sure the sun helps keep their eggs warm before they abandon the nest completely. The eggs may be round or spherical, depending on the type of turtle. Also depending on the species, the eggs may have hard shells or soft, leathery ones. Same with the time of emergence: some eggs hatch in late summer or early fall and the hatchlings rush to safety before they’re eaten by birds or other wildlife, while the hatchlings of other turtles hatch, then linger in their nests until spring.

They’ve got time to wait: the smallest turtles might start out their lives about the size of a nickel or the palm of your hand and they can grow up to nine feet across.

The longest-lived turtles live up to 150 years, but the average turtle life seems to be around 50 to 60 years. They need all

that time, since some can’t mate or reproduce until they reach their 50s.

Things you should never do to/with a turtle: • Never bother a female laying eggs and don’t bother its babies; not only is it rude, but it may be against the law.

• Don’t buy a turtle in a pet store. But if you happen to end up with one, don’t overfeed it and don’t ever paint its shell because it hurts their health in several ways.

• Never swim with a snapping turtle; those big boys are capable of removing fingers, toes and—um—appendages in a hot second.

If you’ve got a few bucks lying around and you need somewhere to sink them, think about donating to a turtle conservation group. They’ll for sure tell you, “Tanks!” ▼ Terri Schlichenmeyer’s second book, The Book of Facts and Trivia: American History, came out early this year. Her third is slated for fall.

Photo credit: G. Pebbles USFWS

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MAY 17, 2024

109 Letters

TALKING TRASH (and Recycling)

BY JEFFREY DANNIS

You, Too, Can Reduce Methane

G

lobal warming concerns me. I don’t wake up in the middle of the night like I did in sixth grade when I realized that there were a few men out there who could press a button and launch nuclear bombs to destroy the world, but I still have some climate change anxiety.

In a recent study of more than 10,000 young people aged 16-25 years old, living across 10 countries (including the United States), more than half (59 percent) reported being very or extremely worried about climate change, and 84 percent were at least moderately worried.

Maybe because I am a baby boomer and have some experience with crises under my belt, or perhaps because I will not be around to see the ultimate effects of this crisis, though it is urgent for me, I am not losing sleep over it. Yet. While there is lots of talk about carbon dioxide, there is much less talk by the public about methane. Methane is our simplest hydrocarbon, CH₄. When burned, one molecule of methane will produce one molecule of carbon dioxide (CO₂) and two molecules of water (H₂O).

The impetus for capturing and destroying (burning) methane is how it behaves in the atmosphere. Methane is a much better insulator than carbon dioxide and lasts in the atmosphere a long time. Given its insulating properties and lifespan, each molecule has between 25 and 80 times the heat trapping capacity of carbon dioxide. This is a big deal.

So yes, my biome sometimes produces methane, especially after beans and dried fruit. And we know cows produce methane, but what else? The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) estimates that most fugitive methane comes from several sources. Anthropogenic (human activity generated) emission sources include landfills, oil and natural gas systems, agricultural activities, coal mining, stationary and mobile combustion,

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wastewater treatment, and certain industrial processes.

Many of these are regulated industrial activities such as mining, and oil and gas production, as well as landfills and wastewater treatment. Our influence there is speaking with legislators and regulators and encouraging them to tighten rules about detecting, reducing, and controlling escaping methane. World Environment Day is June 5. It’s a good day—but not the only day!—we should all make our voices heard.

One of the simplest ways to reduce the amount of methane produced by landfills is to put less easilydegradable material in them.

We also can make an impact at a personal level, by reducing our demand for those things that produce fugitive methane in the first place. We can reduce the carbon impact of our transportation, be more efficient with our home energy use, and reduce food waste.

Really, reduce food waste? Yes. Reduce food waste. EPA estimates that landfills produce about 14 percent of the fugitive methane created in the US and that 58 percent of landfill methane is attributable to food waste.

That spoiled food you throw away eventually finds its way to one of our landfills, where it doesn’t just sit there.

It rots. Packed in plastic garbage bags, compacted and covered with dirt, it continues to break down. However— unlike in your compost bin—in a landfill, food waste does not have access to oxygen to break down into water and carbon dioxide. The rotting process uses what little air there is, and then the

microbes begin to break it down into methane and carbon dioxide.

Since the 1990s landfills have been required to use landfill caps and gas collection systems. While landfill flares have a great destruction efficiency (9899 percent), it is the capturing process that is not efficient. When compared against prediction models, most landfills capture and destroy only about 60 percent of the methane it is estimated they produce.

Part of the issue is that landfills are big, and it takes a while for a landfill cell to be filled, capped, and the collection system installed. Microbes start in on the food waste and other easily decomposable materials even before they get to the landfill. (You’ve smelled your garbage can, right?) So, capping doesn’t capture everything.

One of the simplest ways to reduce the amount of methane produced by landfills is to put less easily-degradable material in them. EPA believes that 24 percent of our garbage could be composted. Food waste is much of that.

That means you need to: • Eat your left-overs • Don’t overbuy and then have to throw stuff away • Take an inventory before going grocery shopping • Google recipes for those ingredients that will spoil • Use the freezer (label the container!)

• Share fresh herbs and veggies with your neighbor if you aren’t planning on using the whole bunch • Compost You will find that the above suggestions will make your food bill smaller, trash bag lighter, and give a little relief to your climate change anxiety. ▼ Jeffrey Dannis is an environmental engineer, nutrient consultant, and certified composter.

He can be reached at FitnessEngineering.net or at Jeff.Dannis.FE@outlook.com.

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Discover Your Wonder with Jack Lingo, REALTOR®

Coastal Delaware Sales & Rentals

REHOBOTH BEACH

246 Rehoboth Avenue Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971 office: 302-227-3883

LEWES

1240 Kings Highway Lewes, DE 19958 office: 302-645-2207

MILLSBORO

28442 Dupont Boulevard Millsboro, DE 19966 office: 302-934-3970

MAY 17, 2024

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Help Us Welcome Our New Optometrist Dr. Sam Stumer OD We’re proud to welcome Dr. Stumer to the Envision Eye Care team. Dr. Stumer has extensive experience in comprehensive eye care, including contact lens fitting, treatment and management of ocular disease, and the pre-and post-operative care of cataract and refractive surgery patients.

Call today to schedule an eye exam for yourself or a family member.

302.645.4789 18756 Coastal Hwy, Rehoboth Beach DE 19971 www.envisionrehoboth.com

MAY 17, 2024

113 Letters

WE REMEMBER G. Linda Rikard

L

inda Rikard, 75, of Milton, Delaware, passed away on April 12, 2024, after a valiant battle with Alzheimer’s.

Born in Johnston, South Carolina, Dr. Rikard is survived

by Mary Jo Tarallo, her devoted partner of 25 years; many Baltimore cousins; two South Carolina cousins; a niece; a nephew; and an aunt. She was predeceased by her parents, Grace and John Odell Rikard, Sr., and brothers RV Rikard and John Odell Rikard, Jr. Dr. Rikard was a star basketball player in high school. Throughout her life she enjoyed golf, skiing, tennis, music, dancing, and travel. Those who knew and loved her described her as a “kind spirit.” She had a great smile and could charm anyone.

Dr Rikard graduated from Winthrop University with a BS in Physical Education in 1970. She continued her studies at the University of Georgia earning an MEd in 1972. In 1979 she was awarded an EdD in Administration and Curriculum Development from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro.

Dr. Rikard’s teaching career included instructor positions at Otterbein and Coker colleges, visiting professor at USC, and assistant professorships at the University of Southern Mississippi and Columbia College. She served for several years as Director of Undergraduate and Graduate programs at East Carolina University. She was recruited in 1996 by George Mason University as the Academic Program Coordinator of the Bachelor of Science in Education in Health and Physical Education program.

She was instrumental in designing the Physical Education Concentration within the MEd in Curriculum and Instruction in the Advanced Studies for Teaching and Learning at George Mason and served as the advisor for the program until retiring in 2011.

Dr Rikard was a well-respected educator who produced more than 50 peer-reviewed publications, as well as presentations at the international, national, regional, and local levels. She received multiple grants and served on the editorial boards of The Physical Educator, the Journal of Teaching in Physical Education, and the Journal of Physical Education, Recreation & Dance. She also was a guest reviewer for Research Quarterly for Exercise and Sport and Quest. Her service to the discipline of physical education included being the Secretary of the AAHPERD Research Consortium (now SHAPE America), chair of the Credentials Committee for SHAPE America, a member of the Research Consortium Executive Committee, and invited member of the NASPE (now SHAPE America) Task Force on Minimal Skill Competency of Pre-Service Teachers.

She also served as Secretary/Treasurer of the Special Interest Group on Research on Learning and Instruction in Physical Education of the American Educational Research Association.

A Celebration of Life is planned for May 18 in Milton. She is interred at Dulaney Valley Memorial Gardens near Baltimore. A scholarship fund has been set up in her name to help prospective health and physical education students. For those who would like to support this effort, there is a direct online link set up here: https://advancement.gmu.edu/24EDRI. Checks are also accepted; please make payable to: George Mason University Foundation and add G. Linda Rikard Endowed Scholarship to the memo line. Forward to: Shirley Hartman, College of Education and Human Development, 4400 University Drive, MSN 121, Fairfax, VA 22030. ▼

Barbara “Babs” Butta

B

arbara “Babs” Mary Butta, 66, passed away at her home in Rehoboth Beach Monday, April 15, 2024, after a courageous fight with cancer.

Barb grew up in Baltimore, Maryland, graduating from the Catholic High School in Baltimore in 1975. She then attended Potomac Horse Academy before jumping in a pick-up truck with her friend, Gina, to cross the country to Letters 114

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Los Angeles to start a career at AAA. After living for a time in San Francsico, she moved back to the East Coast.

She settled in Alexandria, Virginia, and began a successful career in information technology. She was one of a few subject matter experts who contractors sought out to support the United States Postal Service. In 2001 she settled into her home in Rehoboth Beach, where she became an active member of the

community. She loved Rehoboth Beach, where she was often seen riding her Aprilia motorbike, often recklessly.

Babs was known for her infectious smile, feisty personality, humor, and the ease with which she made new friends. She also held a special place in her heart for her many family pets (Francesca, Fresco, Harriet, and Sassy, just to name a few), many of which she adopted, or fostered and then adopted.

© 2024 Delaware Hospice

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Concerned about—and determined to secure—the future of her pets, Babs made a sizeable donation to Just Us Cat & Kitten Rescue in Rehoboth Beach to care for her cats after she passed.

Barb took part in many activities; recently, she enjoyed tennis, golf, pickleball, and being part of a women’s softball team. Never one to sit still for long, she was also surprisingly active in a Fantasy Football league and recently joined a local gambling club—for entertainment purposes only. She never wanted to miss out on an opportunity to meet new people.

While Barb was feisty, she was also very sentimental and a good friend. She paid close attention to her friends’ and family’s lives. She was a wonderful communicator and stayed in touch with distant family members in Europe or the older friends-of-a-friend from Alexandria. She was also an amateur genealogist, even traveling to Italy and the Czech Republic to gather as much information on her European heritage as possible. She was so proud of the results of her research.

Finally, Barb was an avid wildlife photographer, primarily in the backyard habitat she created. If you were lucky enough to be on her monthly email, you were blessed to see the incredible pictures she took.

Barb was proceeded in death by her parents, Sal and Gloria, and her older sister, Debbe. She is survived by her brother, Mitch, and by aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews, cousins, and many, many friends.

A viewing and Celebration of Life were held April 19 at Parsell Funeral Homes and Crematorium, Atkins-Lodge Chapel, Lewes, Delaware. ▼ MAY 17, 2024

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MAY 17, 2024

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CAMP REHOBOTH PRIDE EVENTS Help staff CAMP Rehoboth events throughout the month of June, including: Delaware Pride Festival in Dover (June 1), Milton Pride (June 8), Pride Film Festival (June 13-16), CAMP Rehoboth Chorus concerts (June 14-16), Pride Build (June 26), and Voices from Stonewall (June 28 & 29).

CROP: CAMP REHOBOTH OUTREACH PROGRAM YOUR NAME

The CAMP Rehoboth Outreach Program (CROP) is constantly working to cultivate community and strengthen relationships and the connections between us all. Upcoming events: Day at Brandywine SPCA, National Trails Day, and Rehoboth Art League Cottage Tours.

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Sign up at camprehoboth.com/volunteers.

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Your volunteer efforts benefit you and others.

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Send your check for $50 to CAMP Rehoboth, 37 Baltimore Ave., Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971. If you prefer to use your Visa, MasterCard or American Express call 302-227-5620.

— PLEASE VISIT —

camprehoboth.com/volunteers to register as a volunteer and to sign up for available opportunities.

THANK YOU to all the CAMP Rehoboth Community Center Volunteers for the period: 4/5/24 - 5/3/24

ACCESSIBILITY

Hope Vella

Dave Scuccimarra Travis Stevens

ADVOCACY TEAM

CAMP DATABASE

Daniel Bruner David Garrett Leslie Ledogar Sherri McGee ARTS TEAM

Logan Farro Jane Knaus Lois Powell Leslie Sinclair Patricia Stiles Debbie Woods CAMP ADMIN

Sherri McGee CAMP CHORUS LEADERSHIP COMMITTEE

Bill Fuchs Dianna Johnston Carolyn Laurenzo Judy Olsen Gloria Richards

Sondra Arkin

CAMP LIBRARY

Glenn Lash

CAMP MAINTENANCE

Carol Brice Eric Korpon

CAMP THEATRE

Teri Seaton Russell Stiles

CAMPCIERGES

Joe Benshetler Barbara Breault Ken Currier Adam Emel-Firestone Jim Mease Kim Nelson Pamela Rule Patricia Stiles Russell Stiles Joe Vescio

CAMPSAFE HIV TESTING AND COUNSELING

Dick Hospital E.J. Kenyon Sharon Morgan Joe Vescio

CAMPSHOTS PHOTO VOLUNTEERS

G Michael Beigay Tony Burns Vincent DeLissio David Garrett

CROP AT SOUTHERN DELAWARE THERAPEUTIC RIDING

Cathy Brown Karen DeSantis Kathy Gantz Kate Gehret Leslie Jennings Jill Masterman Tammy Mundie Jana Puffenberger Holly West

Kim Nelson Rina Pellegrini John Michael Sophos Joe Vescio

DEVELOPMENT TEAM

Jane Blue Pat Catanzariti Wes Combs Mike DeFlavia Amanda Mahony Albanese

WOMEN’S FEST 2024

See page 16 for the full list of Women’s FEST volunteers.

LETTERS DISTRIBUTION TEAM

Glenn Lash Jim Mease

LETTERS MAILING TEAM

Nancy Hewish Grant Kingswell Vicki Martina Stephen Palmer Linda Yingst

LETTERS PROOFING

Barb Ralph

VOLUNTEER DEVELOPMENT COMMITTEE

Madelyn Jablon Marce McCollum-Martin Jim Mease MAY 17, 2024

117 Letters

AD INDEX 1776 Steakhouse...................................................39 Accent On Travel......................................................9 Activ Pest Solutions................................................86 AG Renovations......................................................79 Aqua Bar & Grill......................................................89 Atlantic Jewelry......................................................43 Beebe Healthcare..................................................54 Beebe Medical Foundation....................................55 Bodhi Kitchen.........................................................99 Brandywine Urology Consultants...........................11 bsd..........................................................................37 Café Azafrán...........................................................84 CAMP Rehoboth Annual Sponsors...........................6 CAMP Rehoboth Chorus, On the Road Again.........47 CAMP Rehoboth Development/Charitable Distribution.............................................................17 CAMP Rehoboth Development Ways to Give...........7 CAMP Rehoboth Letters Subscription................. 117 CAMP Rehoboth Membership................................40 CAMP Rehoboth Membership Sign Up..................41 CAMP Rehoboth SUNFESTIVAL....................... 30, 31 CAMP Rehoboth Women’s FEST Thank you.... 16, 17 CAMPsafe...............................................................48 Caroline Huff, Artist................................................29 Chris Beagle Group, Realtors.................................39 Clear Space Theatre...............................................87 Coho’s Market & Grill..............................................29 Collins Podiatry......................................................51

Letters 118 MAY 17, 2024

Community Lutheran..............................................27 County Bank...........................................................45 Delaware Community Foundation...................... 101 Delaware Hospice............................................... 115 Delaware Pride.......................................................19 Diego’s Bar Nightclub ..69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 75, 76, 77 Dogfish Head.........................................................39 Donna Whiteside, Realtor......................................18 Elegant Slumming..................................................23 Envision Style & Health ...................................... 113 Freddie’s Beach Bar & Restaurant................ 81, 119 Gay Women of Rehoboth.......................................51 go fish go brit.........................................................79 Hugh Fuller, Realtor................................................58 Humane Animal Partners Delaware.................... 118 Jack Lingo, Real Estate....................................... 111 Jenn Harpel, Morgan Stanley.................................23 John Black, Realtor................................................63 Jolly Trolley......................................................... 116 Lana Warfield.........................................................79 La-Di-Da..................................................................80 Lee Ann Wilkinson Group, Realtors..................... 109 Lori’s Café........................................................... 100 Loves Liquors.........................................................33 Maplewood Dental Associates............................ 116 MCC of Rehoboth...................................................44 McWillams Ballard Real Estate............................ 103 MERR Institute........................................................84

Milton Theatre........................................................96 New Wave Spas................................................... 100 Olivia Travel............................................................13 Pride Film Festival..................................................57 Purple Parrot..........................................................59 PWW Law................................................................63 Randy Mason/Shirley Kalvinsky, Realtors..............85 Rehoboth Beach Bears........................................ 112 Rehoboth Beach Dental.........................................84 Rehoboth Guest House..........................................80 Rigby’s Bar & Grill...................................................95 Saved Souls Animal Rescue................................ 113 Sea Bova Associates, Realtors............................ 120 Seaboard Hospitality..............................................97 State Farm - Jeanine O’Donnell/Eric Blondin.........51 Stuart Kingston Gallery..........................................35 Sussex Family YMCA..............................................97 The Joe Maggio Group, Realtors...........................51 The Lodge at Truitt Homestead..............................33 Troy Roberts, Realtor..............................................23 True Blue Jazz........................................................93 Unfinished Business............................................ 115 Village Volunteers............................................... 113 Volunteer Opportunities...................................... 117 Volunteer Thank You........................................... 117 Windsor’s Flowers..................................................80 Zane Jones, Realtor...............................................45

MAY 17, 2024

119 Letters

LINDA BOVA

BRIDGET BAUER

BROKER-ABR®

ASSOC. BROKER-REALTOR®

CELL

CELL

302-542-4197

302-245-0577

*A/C

AVALON & LAWSON RD Georgetown. 6.18-acre lot.

2-story barn-style garage.

Chicken coop. Well, septic, electric + DelDOT entrance permit. No HOA, but Deed restrictions. $325,000 (2059888)

HENLOPEN STATION Rehoboth Beach. 10 blocks to the boardwalk! 2BR/2BA 3rd-floor end unit w/balcony.

Furnished. Updated interior.

Community pool. $712/qtr dues. $525,000 (2061236)

ANGOLA BEACH - Lewes.

Remodeled 1973 4BR/2BA. Water views from front deck.

Shed. Marina/pool community is 10 miles to beach. $199,900

ANGOLA BEACH - Lewes.

1978 3BR/1.5BA home has 10’x30’ sunroom. Fenced yard. Furnished. Community pools, marina. 10 miles to bch. $109,900 (2056560) Lot Rent

(2055630) Lot Rent $734/mt. includes water & sewer

COLONIAL EAST - Rehoboth Beach. 1979 3BR/1BA. 10’x20’ screened porch. Extra parking. Shed. Community pool. 4 miles to Rehoboth & Lewes beaches. $132,000 (2057862) Lot Rent $600/mt.

ANGOLA BEACH - Lewes.

2022 3BR/2BA. 1,680 sf.

Oversized driveway. Deck. Shed w/elec. Community marina, pool.

10 miles to bch. $223,500

ANGOLA BEACH - Lewes.

2019 3BR/2BA. Screened porch & open deck. Fenced yard. Community pools, marina.

10 miles to bch. $215,000

(2059320) Lot Rent $787/mt. includes water & sewer.

(2056218) Lot Rent $784/mt. includes water & sewer.

ANGOLA BEACH - Lewes.

Remodeled 1984 2BR/2BA. Fireplace. New deck. Shed.

Community pools, marina. 10 miles to bch. $139,900

ANGOLA BEACH - Lewes.

Remodeled 1985 3BR/2BA. Pretty kitchen w/SS & quartz counters. Shed. 10 miles to bch. Marina/pool. $169,900

$715/mt. includes water & sewer.

(2057312) Lot Rent $699/mt. includes water & sewer.

(2061456) Lot Rent $699/mt. includes water & sewer.

COLONIAL EAST - Rehoboth Beach. Remodeled 2005 3BR/2BA doublewide. Shed w/elec. Community pool. 4 miles to Rehoboth & Lewes beaches. $159,000 (2052192)

S W E E T B R I A R - Lewes.

“Like New” 2022 3BR/2BA home is 1,120 sq. ft. Split BR plan. Big kitchen w/SS appliances. Community pool.

8 miles to beach. $129,900

ANGOLA ESTATES - Lewes.

1988 3BR/2BA is 1,344sf.

Nicely remodeled kitchen & baths. Vinyl plank flooring.

Marina/pool community. 10 miles to bch. $175,000 (2056634)

Lot Rent $903/mt.

(2061362) Lot Rent $722/mt.

Lot Rent $722/mt. includes sewer

+ $2,500 SELLER CREDIT

SILVER VIEW FARM Rehoboth. 1979 2BR/1BA is 980sf + 11’x20’ enclosed porch. Updated kitchen & bath. Window AC. Pool & 3 miles to beach. $89,000 (2059452) Lot Rent $688/mt.

CAMELOT MEADOWS - Rehoboth. 1979 2BR/2BA w/10’x20’ 4-season room.

Fenced yard. Covered porch & deck. 2 Sheds. Community pool.

4 miles to beach. $125,000 (2061230) Lot Rent $848/mt.

ASPEN MEADOWS Rehoboth. 1986 2BR/2BA. 1,350sf. Updated kitchen.

Screened porch. Privacy fencing. Community pool.

4 miles to beach. $137,000 (2059222) Lot Rent $752/mt.

SEA AIR - Rehoboth.

1982 3BR/2BA. Parking for 3 vehicles. Porch, patio, shed & outdoor shower.

Community pool & 3 miles to beach. $155,000 (2050802)

Lot Rent $644/mt includes water.

20250 Coastal Highway - Suite 3, Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971  302-227-1222 office www.SEABOVA.com 

EMAIL – RealEstate@SEABOVA.com

Office Independently Owned & Operated by SBA, Inc. Prices, promotions & availability subject to change without notice. *A/C Active/Under Contract -- Accepting Back-Up Offers

5/6/2024