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A Chicago judge once said to the great lawyer, Clarence Darrow, "Counsellor, f hope you are not trying to show contempt for this court." And Darrow replied, "Judge, one can always hope."

>k*<*

A Texan in Australia kept bragging about how wonderful everything is in Texas. They sprung a huge kangaroo on him, and he wanted to know what it was. Said the Australian: "You mean you have no grasshoppers in Texas?" They tell of a Dallas girl who, when asked where she was going to spend her vacation, said she thought she would go to Australia. Said she-"That's the only part of Texas f've never seen." And the Australian story never gets old, about the boomerang thrower who was given a new boomerang for a present. FIe went crazy trying to throw his old boomerang away.

**rF

Which brings to mind the man from San Francisco who was traveling in the East, and who was urged to tell about his home state and city. He said: "I make it a rule when away from home, never to brag about my home. All I've got to say about San Francisco is that the farther you get from it, the worse things get."

*<rf*

The old man died early one morning, leaving a fortune to the nephew who was at his bedside. The young heir, who had a sense of humor, sent a death notice to,friends, saying: "This morning both my uncle Dave and I entered upon a better life."