ILOSOPHY

I will build a school house in every valley over the whole earth. I will crown every hillside with a place of worship consecrated to the gospel of peace."

Should Be A Coptoin

Police Commissioner (examining applicant) "How would you g'o about it to disperse a mob?"

Applicant: "I would pass around the hat and take up a collection."

Commissioner: "You'll do. Get measured for your uniform."

More Dictionory Revisions

EPIGRAM: Any remark made by man of wealth and power. - SPECIALIST: Man in white coat who can say "fifty dollars, please" without blushing.

HOME: The little building that stands on the same lot with the garage.

PAYROLL BANDIT: The Missus.

Reduced Roies

A Scotchman, wishing to know his fate. telegraphecl a proposal of marriage to the lady of his choice. The answer did^not come untillate at night, but was in the affrrmative.

A friend said to him : "I'd think twice before marrying a girl that kept me r,,r,aiting all day."

"No," said the Scot, nthe girl who waits for the night rates is the right girl for me."