Frameworks of Faith and Spirituality

BROAD A Feminist & Social Justice Magazine

Frameworks of Faith and Spirituality

Table of Contents

Cover art: J.C.

Issue 61, September 2013

BROAD A Feminist & Social Justice Magazine

What’s Your LGBT IQ?

Seeking contributions on the topics of orientation, gender identity, LGBTQIA activism, politics, and discrimination, drag, gender expression, queerness, race, ethnicity, poverty, disease, pleasure, family and how LGBTQIA relates to feminism and social justice

Send your artwork, poetry, and writing to

broad.luc@gmail.com by October 14

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A feminist is a person who answers “yes” to the question, “Are women human?” Feminism is not about whether women are better than, worse than or identical with men. And it’s certainly not about trading personal liberty--abortion, divorce, sexual self-expression-for social protection as wives and mothers, as pro-life feminists propose. It’s about justice, fairness, and access to the

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range of human experience. It’s about women consulting their own well-being and being judged as individuals rather than as members of a class with one personality, one social function, one road to happiness. It’s about women having intrinsic value as persons rather than contingent value as a means to an end for others: fetuses, children, the “family,” men. ~ Katha Pollitt

broad | brÔd |

adjective 1 having an ample distance from side to side; wide 2 covering a large number and wide scope of subjects or areas: a broad range of experience 3 having or incorporating a wide range of meanings 4 including or coming from many people of many kinds 5 general without detail 6 (of a regional accent) very noticeable and strong 7 full, complete, clear, bright; she was attacked in broad daylight noun (informal) a woman.

broad | brÔd |

slang a promiscuous woman

phrases broad in the beam: with wide hips or large buttocks in broad daylight: during the day, when it is light, and surprising for this reason have broad shoulders: ability to cope with unpleasant responsibilities or to accept criticism City of broad shoulders: Chicago synonyms see: wide, extensive, ample, vast, liberal, open, all-embracing antonyms see: narrow, constricted, limited, subtle, slight, closed see also broadside (n.) historical: a common form of printed material, especially for poetry

BROAD Mission: Broad’s mission is to connect the WSGS program with communities of students, faculty, and staff at Loyola and beyond, continuing and extending the program’s mission. We provide space and support for a variety of voices while bridging communities of scholars, artists, and activists. Our editorial mission is to provoke thought and debate in an open forum characterized by respect and civility.

WSGS Mission: Founded in 1979, Loyola’s Women’s Studies Program is the first women’s studies program at a Jesuit institution and has served as a model for women’s studies programs at other Jesuit and Catholic universities. Our mission is to introduce students to feminist scholarship across the disciplines and the professional schools; to provide innovative, challenging, and thoughtful approaches to learning; and to promote social justice.

Frameworks of Faith and Spirituality This issue explores the topics of religion, faith, spirituality, prayer, spiritual journeys, discrimination, gender, orientation, family, and relationships. Some of our new sections and columns include “Message Me,” “Over the Rainbow,” “Radical Self-Love,” “MicroagresSHUNS,” “Oh Sh*t Now,” as well as the return of “Tell-A-Vision” and the official release of “Girl Gang Conspiracy.”

Karolyne Carloss Consulting Editor

Gaby Ortiz Flores

Diversity and Outreach Editor

Katie Klingel Editor in Chief

Emma Steiber

Contetnt and Section Editor

J. Curtis Main Consulting Editor

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BROAD Team

Cont words are useless

At the Crossroads of Gender and Spirituality, Xavier Benavides

Bamiyan Reborn 3, Andra Samelson Shahmama, Andra Samelson Miss Judged, J.C. Design Aesthetic Freestyle Writing Reel, Michelle Graves Movement Motivaton Momentum, Michelle Graves

White American Church and Me, Gemma Lee

tell-a-vision

Muslim Jihadists, Bill O’Reilly

A Convert’s Journey, Jill Kreider Not All Who Wander are Lost - J.R.R. Tolkein, Bianca Grove

Articles

madads

Church Signs

Media /Art

A Grown Up Lesson From Childhood, Rachel Patterson Pope Francis: A New Hope, Karla Estela Rivera

broadsides

Series of Poems, Brian Anderson Our Nature’s Refrain, Zachary Martinez Gentile Passover, Ben Briggs

bookmark here

The Spiral Dance, Starhawk

FROM YOUR EDITOR Gaby Ortiz-Flores VISITING EDITOR Brian Anderson

What’s Your LGBTIQ? Ad

BRO

tents Queer Thoughts

A Sacrificial Awakening, Emma Steiber

ALTSTYLE

My Spirituality: An Ever-Evolving Postulation, Katie Klingel

Radical Self-Love

career call

Hillel Director, Jessica Ost Youth Director, Andy Tuttle Director of Campus Engagements, IFYC, Katie Bringman Baxter

The Beginning, Gaby Ortiz Flores

feminist fires

Emilie Townes

middle eastern musings

Spirituality and You, Abeer Allan

Oh Sh*t now

Southern Belle & Jasmine Revolution

Message Me

What does your faith/spirituality feel like to you?

Inside r out

Mr. Clean Was My God, J. Curtis Main

Talk to andie

Denise Kaufman Andie Karras

&

ex bibliothecis

wla (re)animated

Spirituality & Religion Discovered by Reading & Watching, Jane P. Currie

Artworks: Liturgical

Over the rainbow

MicroAgresSHUNS

Two Men Can Go on a Date to Mass, Patrick Fina

quote corner

Malcolm X Flannery O’Connor

girl gang conspiracy

The Agony & Ecstasy of a Girl Gang Conspiracy Nina Berman

OAD

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Columns

BROAD Schedule 2013-2014

BROADs Behind the Scenes CONTRIBUTOR GUIDELINES BROAD MISSION AND PEOPLE

From Your Editor

Dear Readers, I want to welcome you all to the first issue of the 2013-14 year. As the new Diversity & Outreach Editor and latest addition to the BROAD team, I am very excited for this month’s issue but before we jump into it, I want to take a moment to tell you a little bit about myself. My name is Gaby Ortiz Flores and I identify as a cisgendered, mostly straight, 1.5 generation Latina woman, who like Ms. Grove

a featured contributor in this month’s issue is also spiritually seeking. I was born in Mexico and grew up on the southside of Chicago in what was then one of the most diverse neighborhoods in the country (and for Chicago). I graduated from the University of Chicago in 2005 with a degree in English Literature (and possibly a degree in ultra-nerdiness).

Additionally, I am excited to introduce three new sections to this year’s BROAD issue. Oh Sh*t Now is an anonymous dialogue between two individuals about their experience dealing with abuse and toxicity in relationships. Microaggresshuns is a section that focuses on highlighting the different microaggressions that people experience. Lastly, Message Me is an opportunity for more interaction with readers. Every month we will post a question on our FB page and the responses (can be posted or privately messaged) will be posted in our Message Me section.

All of these sections will continue to relate back to the monthly themes of each issue.

In thinking about the topic of this month’s issue the Frameworks of Faith and Spirituality, I had a number of thoughts but the one I kept returning to is my own spiritual journey.

I would have made a great Catholic, for example.

At least this is what I have always believed. If my parents had taken me to mass more frequently and if my parents had enrolled me in Catechism classes, I would have been a deeply devout Catholic. I would have been way more Catholic than any of my three sisters to the point where I may even have wanted to become a nun. Or so I have often fantasized.

Instead we bounced around to different churches mostly Catholic, baptist, and other types of Christian churches all through my childhood. My mother deeply regrets this because she believes that I renounced formalized religion because of th. She is not entirely wrong but what she does not realize is that in taking me to a multitude of churches and temples, my parents gave me a wonderful gift.

It is true that I am a heathen in the strictest sense of the word. I do not belong to any formal religion nor am I interested in ever being a part of a formal religion. That said, I know how important, how transformative, and how grounding formalized religion is for many people. I have experienced a number of beautiful moments in religious spaces and have wit-

nessed a number of moments of compassion, kindness, and love from strangers who were motivated purely by their religious beliefs.

Belief is a powerful thing. That is what my parents endowed me with--belief and the significance of belief. Going to many different types of churches may not have made me a devout anything but it instilled me with the idea that our beliefs are what form and define who we are and the choices we make.

Belief systems are important no matter who you are and we all have them in one shape or another. Belief is required in all religions but you do not need a religion to have a set of beliefs that drive and move you to action.

Here at BROAD we often refer to this issue as the religion issue but really it is an issue that analyzes, explores, and reflects on the different belief systems that each of us possess and that impact our lives.

The Samelson’s pieces about the Bamiyan Buddha’s are not just about honoring the two Bamiyan Buddha’s that were destroyed but for me they’re also about honoring the impact that religious and faith symbols like the Buddha have on millions.

The article on Pope Francis touches on the impact that a Jesuit pope might have on the papacy and on the entire Catholic church. The Mad Ads of different church signs and the Tell-A-Vision with Bill O’Reilly both showcase the daily messages we receive on religion and questions the effect they might have on the viewer. Wang’s article goes further than that by pointing out the racism within Christianity in America. Katie Bringman Baxter speaks to her experience of becoming more “staunchly” Christian because of her, Ben Briggs’ poetry expresses his discovery of Jewish traditions while visiting editor Brian Anderson expresses deep vulnerability in his poetry.

All of these pieces prove that good or bad, religion and faith transform and impact lives in one way or another.

Abrazos, Gaby

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My background is primarily in theater, arts education, and youth work. I also enjoy writing haikus. I currently work for the Department of Student Diversity & Multicultural Affairs at Loyola University Chicago, where I am also doing a Masters in Communications focusing on storytelling and filmmaking. It’s an honor to be part of the BROAD team and I look forward to sharing my column “Radical (Self) Love” with all of you.

Visiting Editor

Brian Anderson Interfaith Campus Minister Loyola University Chicago

Biography: Brian Anderson works at Loyola University Chicago in Campus Ministry as the Interfaith Campus Minister. He grew up in Indiana and after college moved to Anchorage, AK for the Jesuit Volunteer Corps. While in Alaska, he worked as a social worker at a homeless day shelter and as the catchphrase would suggest from JVC, he was ruined for life. He attended graduate school at Seattle University obtaining a Master of Arts in Student Development Administration. During his time in Seattle, he explored issues of faith and masculinity and realized these to be his passions in life.

Brian has traveled all over the U.S. and brief stints in Costa Rica and travels to the Caribbean, Peru, and Europe. When not working, you can find him running, gardening, or cooking. Brian is very excited to be joining the BROAD magazine as a visiting editor for this issue has it forced him to reflect back on his own travels, both physically and mentally. Gender and spirituality are very close to his heart and having the opportunity to revisit these themes meant a lot.

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BROADs Behind the Scenes

words are useless expression/commentary through art

Miss Judged

Description: The newly crowned Miss America, Nina Davuluri, whose parents moved to the US in 1981 from India, is the first winner of the pageant to be of Indian descent. She was born in New York. Once her new title was released, a large backlash occurred that involved racism, islamophobia, ethnocentrism, and xenophobia. This piece was inspired by this backlash.

Nina was labeled a terrorist, a traitor, a non-American, and many other names and identifiers that are not true. A large amount of this backlash involves religious intolerance and intertwined racism. The Mother Mary image is a positive religious symbol, whereas Nina was depicted as a threat. Yet, Nina, as Miss America, is supposed to represent the US, which is supposed to stand for religious freedom. Like the first Jewish Miss America of 1945, and the first African American Miss American of 1981, Nina received similar backlash. She was Miss Judged, 2013.

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Artist: J.C.

BROAD People

Message Me We Asked, You Answered

What does your faith/spirituality feel like to you?

Not directly there, but maybe someday. Or that my faith is in people and that is not a spirituality since we are on this Earth together already!

An expectation I could never live up to.

Full of symbols but no place in reality.

Faith/Spirituality to me is akin to the saying “Jump and the net will appear.” It is a sense of certainty that you can’t explain and leaves people who haven’t experienced it shaking their heads and those that have share affirmations either in silent looks or shout it from the rooftops. Faith/spirituality are also not necessarily entwined in the rules fo religion, they are tied to love and dance with taking chances.

The most incredible touch and sex and kiss and hold and connection and orgasm I ever felt...

broadsides Expressions in poetry via street literature style

My frame won’t break it simply changes, ages, rearranges allowing the discontent to drain The apathy that dined on me seeks another host as if to boast “You fool I’ve picked you clean”

But it was just the means by which to lean the excess from my bones Making room in a crowded heart that refused to start my shape begins to shift You thought this ship was sinking all the while I’m thinking thanks for the reminder I’m inclined to hurt Its not the worst and I’m not the first to fantasize of a set of legs programmed to run away But I’m forced to stay For an undetermined amount of days And just as the grass beneath the wind I was meant to bend

Our Nature’s Refrain Zachary Martinez

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Isn’t it funny how when we speak of life and death we always seem to think of things that could have been?

I can’t help but think its God’s cruel way of telling us we’ll never win But that is neither now nor then because in the end we were built to bend

Faith & Spirituality

At the Crossroads of Gender and Spirituality Xavier Benavides

When discerning the Jesuits, I had the opportunity to meet with a few current novices and asked what they thought the most difficult aspect of novitiate was. I was surprised by the answer. One of my future brothers said quite plainly it was the lack of a woman’s presence. This answer and my own subsequent joining of the Jesuits gave me the chance to explore my own notions of gender and spirituality. For the

uninitiated, the novitiate is the first two years Jesuits spend in formation. The time is spent in a formation house and gives the men time to get to know the Society of Jesus. One spends time exploring one’s faith and creating a spiritual foundation that will serve throughout one’s time as a Jesuit. There are experiments that take a person away from the formation house but this time is mainly filled with opportu-

nities to explore the Jesuit identity with a fantastic group men.

Prior to joining the Jesuits, I had spent my time either in non-profit work or working in human resources, fields proliferated with women. I have had the delight to have had some incredible women role models, bosses, and colleagues. The first 6 people I thought of to write recommendations for my application to religious life were all women. As I can’t remember a time when I worked primarily with men, moving to the novitiate caused a bit of a shock. My first few weeks felt like I was constantly in the locker room, trying to fill the time with sports scores and superficial salutations about personal well-being.

A school counselor friend of mine says that male and female students differ in the way they choose to communicate. He finds that female students face you and eagerly delve into the question “How are you?,” while most male students, rarely go farther than the popular answer of “fine.” He keeps a plastic dartboard in his office just for this. My friend finds that playing darts helps the students relax, enabling them to talk about what is going on. He believes this is why sports like fishing and golf are so popular among men.

My own experiences have reflected this. In the past, my most formative conversations with other men were unexpected. When I wanted advice or needed to get something off my chest, I usually turned to a female friend. It seems that most women have a

the real me.

Surprisingly, I found that this perception spilled over into my prayer. I have always felt close to Mary and incorporate her often into my daily reflections.

My thoughts of God the father and the son were often vague and filled with characterizations of them as competent but very contained men. Considering images of God in the Bible, we very rarely hear of God being portrayed as the woman kneading bread (Luke 13:21) or a mother groaning in labor (Isa 66:9). These images show that God is beyond gender and encompasses both male and female qualities. I found that slowly my own perceptions of God changed as I spent time in prayer reflecting on my relationships with men and women.

There are times when I need a strict disciplined version of God and times when I need a compassionate ear to turn to. I believe a good spiritual relationship recognizes the strength in both masculine and feminine aspects of God and also recognizes that in being the body of Christ, we are called to bring all of who are we are and that this is valuable and loved.

My experiences have also taught me not to limit my relationships with others or God by letting my past experiences influence my current encounters. That is the beauty of religious experiences: that you can still be surprised by the revelations you have through prayer and reflection. Finally, it has helped me embrace not only these great men that I now call my Jesuit brothers but broaden my perception of God as

B

way of seeing the whole person and bring that to the workplace. They focus on the work but realize that you are more than just a job description fulfilling a role. I do not mean to say that some men don’t do this as well, but I find that women generally were better at this than men. It took some time but I finally found my space in an environment of mostly men, and I have learned how to share aspects of myself with my brothers and feel that they are seeing

a Father and as a Mother. As American theologian Sallie McFague says, “All of us female and male, have the womb as our first home, all of us are born from the bodies of our mothers, all of us are fed by our mothers. What better imagery could there be for expressing the most basic reality of existence, that we live and move and have our being in God?”

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That is the beauty of religious experiences: that you can still be surprised by the revelations you have through prayer and reflection.

[FS]

Katie Klingel

AltStyle Musings of a Non-Normative Heretic

My Spirituality: An Ever-Evolving Postulation

and confirmations. I never got confirmed, and I think my mom knew she wasn’t going to push me to it, so she gave me all of the religious keepsakes at once. It was my first real “grown-up” thing, and I still cherish the items in that box. The actual communion itself was forgettable, but my mother did say that I chomped down on that communion wafer like it was a potato chip, and the first five pews could definitely hear the crunching.

I was baptized as an infant, and I’m sure it was a great spectacle. I was given godparents, who to this day I sadly do not have as close of a relationship as I would like, religious or not. Our connection mimics the formality of the relationship bestowed upon on us: it is mostly for show. While I do feel like I have a closer relationship to my aunt and uncle than most, the concept of godparent just isn’t there, it’s a symbolic title, given at my baptism, one that up to this point in my life, just hasn’t had much meaning. Even though the relationship is rooted in religion, and I do not find myself religious in any way, I do believe it is a relationship that can be strong even in the absence of religion.

Shortly after this, I entered CCD, which I really couldn’t tell you what it stands for, but it was our once a week religious education. The next step on my checklist of things to do for my religion was confession, and as soon as I found out what it was, the guilt and anxiety took hold. I started racking my brain for all of the childhood sins I had committed, like punching my brother. My brother is seven years older than me, my “punches” happened all of the time, and I highly doubt they ever hurt him. But this is how I imagined confession happening: I would go in, recall EVERY LAST SIN I had ever committed, and if I forgot some, they would never be forgiven. I also feared judgement, not in the religious sense, but the social. It was like going to the bathroom, what if I took too long? Just like how everyone would know that I pooped, everyone would know that I had a long list of sins, I must be a bad kid. Yes, as someone with very real social anxiety, these are the kinds of things that went through my head. Thankfully, I was at the age where my parents let me decide if I wanted to continue my religious education and journey, and I said no. The Catholic Church, while very present in my life, just had no real spiritual impact on me, I saw it more as an obligation, a spectacle, than anything else.

At five, my family was regularly going to church, almost every Sunday. My brother and I were always pretty restless at mass, so my mom would give us things to keep us busy. I can remember one Easter mass where my brother and I were playing with calculators. We were typing out words, seeing all of the things we could spell. I thought it would be fun to play the “guess what letter is missing” game. I was six, I guess fill-in-the-blank was how I was learning to spell, and when I told my mom to guess what letter was missing in “H-E-L-L,” meaning “HELLO,” she was horrified! She just whipped the calculator out of my hands, saying “ugh, Katie, not in here, of all the places!” I look back on this now and realize how ironic this is, since you will almost ALWAYS find the world “hell” in a Catholic Church, on any Sunday. But, she viewed this as my first curse word, when I honestly didn’t even know that “H-E-L-L” was even a real word.

At eight, I received my first communion. We had moved away from the church that I had been baptized in, and did not like our new church (which we hardly went to) so we drove the eight hours just so I could receive it there. I remember loving dressing up in my stark, blindingly white dress, my mother doing my hair in the hotel room. It was just my mom and I on that trip, and she gave me a box full of keepsakes, items from her and her mother’s first communions

In middle school I discovered Eastern religion. One of the great things about my school, while Episcopalian, was our “Spiritual Journey Week.” Each day, for a week, different global religions and forms of spirituality were showcased in assemblies, demonstrations, and discussions. The day on Buddhism was always my favorite, when a Buddhist monk would come speak to us, as well as spend the week creating a sand mandala. I felt very comforted by the focus on the everyday life, that each lesson was about how to be a better person in connection with others, not some greater deity that tested your faith.

It was about the here and now, loving yourself, and extending that love to others. I still feel a great connection to the Buddhist faith, but never pursued it enough to call it my religion.

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I have to be honest, I’m not entirely sure what my spirituality is anymore. It has changed so much over my 21 years, and I’m sure that it will continue to change as I get older. It’s this nebulous idea, a clouded image in the back of my head. Someday I will put in the effort to go through it, narrowing down my thoughts and beliefs. But for now, I can only look back on where my spirituality has taken me, and with great reverence.

It was at this time that I was battling severe depression, and so it does not surprise me that I found such a connection with a religion that was emphasized such self-acceptance. At 15 I ended up in a psychiatric facility, getting the help that I needed. One of the ways in which the program pushed us to find an outlet was in arts and crafts. I still, to this day, do not understand why I did this, but I made myself a bracelet with the words “God’s grace.” Considering the fact that God had not been a part of my conscious thought for about five years now, this baffles me. Nevertheless, this bracelet was super important to my recovery. I think it was less about the religion, and more about finding self-worth. Hey, if that’s what worked for me to start me on the road to recovery, I welcome it. I took the bracelet home, stashed it in a keepsake box, and I’m not sure I’ve seen it since.

Over the next couple years, I rejected all forms of organized religion. I had started getting more in touch with my body, learned about Reiki from my stepmom, attended some Kundalini yoga classes. The idea of chakras, auras, spiritual forces were definitely attractive to me, and this is something that has stuck with me since. There is something to be said for that gut feeling you get when you enter a bad space, the random aches and pains you get when you have something bothering you, or the harmony and bliss your body feels when you are in a happy place. These are not all just psychological, in my opinion. I think the body has real spiritual power, and it is not to be ignored.

At 17, I experienced a loss that would forever change my spirituality. My close friend passed away when trying to cross a busy street on her bike; she was hit by a car. The next few days were met with tears, hugs, and too many phone calls. But one night, a couple days after her death, and just before her funeral, she appeared to me in my dream. We had been on the water polo team together, and in my dream the team and I were at the train station, headed on a trip, sans Tina. I looked up at the stairs, and suddenly saw her walking down them. I ran over to her, hugged her, kept saying “I thought you were dead, thank god you’re here now.” I will never forget that embrace. I tried to get her to come back to the group, how happy they would be to see that she was alive, but she said “I just came to say goodbye.” She hugged me again, and walked back up the stairs. I walked back to the group, like nothing had happened.

That dream, as much as it seems like something that would happen in the movies, was so real to me. I can

remember hugging her, trying to get her to stay, refusing to let go. I’ve never believed in a presence of the dead, but this experience truly changed my mind.

At her funeral, I could feel her there, so badly wanting to comfort her family and friends. For the longest time I could feel her presence with me at certain moments, her arms wrapped around me. While I do not know what I believe as far as an eternal afterlife, I do believe that, at least for a time, the spirits of the dead to exist around us. Some say that this is solely for those who have not yet accepted their death, who roam in “limbo,” but I’m not sure. Tina had accepted her death, but was simply sticking around to comfort those she loved. What comes after death, or even after spiritual limbo? I don’t know, and of course I’ll never know. Maybe there is a “better place,” or maybe it all just ends. Maybe this dream was just a projection, something my mind came up with to comfort myself.

But it doesn’t feel that way, and I don’t believe that.

I can believe in something, but still accept that it might not be true. I have no way of knowing, so of course there is a chance that I am wrong. I know this isn’t how “faith” is supposed to work, that in believing something you are steadfastly stating it as truth, but just look at our language with the word “believe.”

“When is her party?” “I believe it is the 26th.” Belief does not necessarily require a lack of doubt. And I reject the idea that doubt detracts from our spirituality or religion. Faith is about seeding through the doubt, acknowledging it, exploring it. Hopefully you come out on the side of resolving that doubt, but often times you don’t, and that’s okay. You are not a lesser person because of it. For me, I do not know what my spirituality really is, but that’s just the beauty of it, that’s what my spirituality is all about: an exploration of that which I am unsure of.

words are useless expression/commentary through art

Artist: Andra Samelson Description:

The world’s two tallest standing statues of Buddha were destroyed on March 11, 2001 in Bamiyan, Afghanistan by the fundamentalist Taliban rulers. These statues were of tremendous importance to the cultural heritage of Afghanistan. Their destruction was not just an eradication of ancient beauty and inspiration but also a savage act of censorship and intolerance. This event was met with worldwide condemnation and was a sad harbinger of the violence to come exactly six months later in America on September 11. In response to both these tragic events, I created a body of work to give remembrance to the splendor and peace of these two towering Buddhas.

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Bamiyan Reborn 3

“We need more light about each other. Light creates understanding, understanding creates love, love creates patience, and patience creates unity.”

I believe in human beings, and that all human beings should be respected as such, regardless of their color.”

“The future belongs to those who prepare for it today.”

I believe in a religion that believes in freedom.

Any time I have to accept a religion that won’t let me fight a battle for my people, I say to hell with that religion

“A [person] who stands for nothing will fall for anything”

- Malcolm X

“You can’t separate peace from freedom because no one can be at peace unless [they have their] freedom.”

tell-a-vision visions & revisions of our culture(s)

Bill O’Reilly

What hard evidence does O’Reilly have that Muslim jihadists’ only motive for terrorism is to kill Christians and Jews?

How do you reconcile this claim with the fact that the word Jihad has numerous meanings and that most Muslims do not prescribe to the “Holy War” meaning?

What kind of impact do videos like this have on the Muslim community and on our society?

URL: http://foxnewsinsider.com/2013/09/23/oreilly-real-and-only-reason-muslim-terrorists-kill

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Questions: Are these facts or one group’s interpretation of the actions and motives of another group?

madads Busted Advertising, Bustling Economy

• What is wrong?

• Who is missing?

• Who is hurt?

• What does an “inclusive faith” mean to you?

Church

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h Signs

Bookmark Here Get Your Read On. Genre:

Price:

Neopagan

Released:

1979

Pages:

336

$12.69

Back of Book: The twentieth anniversary edition of The Spiral Dance celebrates the pivotal role the book has had in bringing Goddess worship to the religious forefront. This bestselling classic is both an unparalleled reference on the practices and philosophies of Witchcraft and a guide to the life-affirming ways in which readers can turn to the Goddess to deepen their sense of personal pride, develop their inner power, and integrate mind, body, and spirit. Starhawk’s brilliant, comprehensive overview of the growth, suppression, and modern-day reemergence of Wicca as a Goddess-worshipping religion has left an indelible mark on the feminist spiritual consciousness.

In a new introduction, Starhawk reveals the ways in which Goddess religion and the practice of ritual have adapted and developed over the last twenty years, and she reflects on the ways in which these changes have influenced and enhanced her original ideas. In the face of an ever-changing world, this invaluable spiritual guidebook is more relevant than ever.

Pros: Starhawk gives validity to an alternative belief system not centered around a singular “God.” Although emphasizing witchcraft as a religion, she places importance on a “goddess religion,” which redefines the idea of religion and puts religion and spirituality within the female realm. This book gives in-depth descriptions on what it means to worship the Goddess religion and extending the community from humans to animals, air, soil, and the planet we live on. It gives the earth a personal importance that allows one to see how such an earth-based connection can be made. Even more so, this emphasis on spiritual connectedness is extended into the activist realm of ecofeminism, in which a significance is placed on the health of the earth.

Cons: Although Starhawk makes a note of the growing male presence in Wicca in the new edition, The Spiral Dance is limited to the female side of Wicca and does not delve into the all-encompassing realm of Wicca as more than just a goddess, female-centered religion.

Hillel Director: Jessica Ost

Career Call

Learn About the Workplace

1) What is your career?

My career currently is working with Jewish college students as the Hillel professional at Loyola University.

Loyola University is part of a larger conglomerate called Metro Chicago Hillel; Metro Chicago Hillel creates a Chicago-wide Jewish college community for students at eight different campuses (including Loyola University).

In my career I engage with Jewish college students to foster Jewish conversation and learning and to provide real sources for college students to have many traditional and unique Jewish experiences.

2) How did you choose your career?

I do not think that I chose my career, my career chose me! I was very involved in college with the Hillel at my university and I saw how much of an impact it had on my life in college and how that has continued past my college career. Most college students are independent for the first time in their lives when entering college; for the first time nobody else is telling them what to do. College is a time to try new things and find out one’s root values and morals that will hopefully last them a lifetime. Having a strong connection to one’s Jewish identity and communication will help people have more clarity in many other aspects of their life. I want to be the resource to help Jewish college students make important and meaningful choices in college that will affect them positively for years to come.

3) How has your time at Hillel affected your faith journey?

By working at Hillel I have learned that Jewish college students identify with being Jewish on a multitude of levels and there is no “correct” one. I have met Jewish that grew up strictly keeping kosher and I have met Jews that are Jews by choice and do not have Jewish parents. Before working at Hillel I knew that everybody has a different story and that everybody’s Jewish identity is special and unique. By hearing multiple accounts and forming relationships with so many diverse Jewish college students I think that I have questioned and challenged many of my beliefs and traditions within Judaism. Personally, I am not a very observant Jew. I do not observe the Sabbath the way that orthodox Jews do. I used to think that this made me “less Jewish,” but I have learned by working at Hillel that I am just as much of a Jew as an orthodox person is. Ultimately, I support and respect my Jewish decisions with the similar attitude that I give to my students.

5) When have you felt that your gender has influenced your work with Hillel?

I do not think that my gender has had a negative or positive impact with my work at Hillel.

I like to think that somebody who identifies as a man would do as good of a job as I am and would be as passionate towards the work as myself. The Judaism that I practice and that my students practice is very gender neutral and accepting of all genders!

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4) From your time at Hillel, what have you come to appreciate about other faith traditions?

I have met many students from other faith traditions which has been such an exciting perk of this job. I have come to appreciate that my faith tradition has so many similarities to other faith traditions. Unfortunately I think that the media often focuses on the differences between different faith traditions. When one has conversations and relationships with people with other faith traditions one can discover that we are all really so similar.

Faith & Spirituality

Pope Francis: A New Hope?

Karla Estela Rivera

We’re a pretty vocal and passionate group in my office. When we’re not writing grants, planning our annual gala, fielding site visits and wooing board members, we eat. We like to talk about wine. Local Italian eateries know it’s us when we’re calling. It’s like a competition to see who can bring the most decadent donut to the office, and nine times out of ten there’s bacon and chocolate involved.

We’re a passionate group that love the communities we serve and we speak as passionately about what we do outside of the office as we do when we’re trying to score fifteen to a hundred thousand dollars. For example, one of my coworkers is a Reiki Master that believes that she has been visited by aliens (I swear I’m not making this up). I’m the film & theater person that always has a flyer and a story to tell. On top of that, I’m a mother, a photo-a-day mother of a one-

year-old girl. I’m also a youth advocate and am pretty outspoken about my politics (which is okay because we’re all on the same page, which makes for very little self-editing). We also have a young intern who came to our organization because she and our CEO went to the same parish. She’s incredibly devout, very by the book. I’d define her as a Pope Benedict Catholic.

By the book. Women shouldn’t be ordained, because they never have been. Jesuits are too liberal, almost not even really Catholic.

As an office, we’ve got our fingers on the pulse of many major social developments. Whenever a major issue was highlighted, we’d be right on it, either shouting out the latest development as we worked, or sharing the latest Huffpost article. So as the Cardinals went to Rome to decide who would be the next Pope, of course, we heard the play-by-play from our intern.

When the white smoke emerged, her joy could not be contained.

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I know that the church will never be an exact fit with my personal code. I don’t think any organized religion is anyone’s exact fit. I’m okay with that.

Mass became an obligation and not a place for spiritual contemplation and rejuvenation. I felt like a fraud.

I love my gays and think they should be able to marry.

I believe in a woman’s right to choose how she governs her body and that there are some serious things that happen that lead to painful decisions that no one wants to make. I believe that women should be able to become ordained. I believe that God has a sense of humor. In short, I’m the antithesis of the young intern with whom I share an office. It’s sometimes awkward. Where’s that bacon donut?

Is it appropriate to be a little jazzed?

I feel like I’m encountering an ex who broke my heart and is now back and is saying all the right things. So I’m jazzed, but scared. I know that the church will never be an exact fit with my personal code. I don’t think any organized religion is anyone’s exact fit. I’m okay with that. The Pope is beginning to speak my language.

This papal shift intrigues me as the parent of a little girl. Even though she is baptized in the Catholic faith, I hesitate on fully immersing her in it when I’m not entirely sold. I wonder about the internal struggles going on in the Catholic community as the paradigm shift and if the parishes are collectively following suit.

I’m eager to see these shifts as I ponder how I want to move forward in my spiritual journey. The rebel in me hopes to see some fireworks that lead to a more inclusive, less judgmental paths.

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This bothered me. I was baptized and confirmed at Our Lady of Mercy Parish at sixteen, then led by Father Don Headley, who organized the poor in Panama starting in the late 60’s for 13 years. He was a fierce advocate of social justice and his liberal approach to the faith is what hooked me. As I became an adult and Father Don left OLM, I became disconnected from the Catholic faith. Catholicism is the glue that keeps my family together, but it hasn’t spoken to me like it did back in the 90’s. It went into what I call, “the religion zone” – a set of rules, that if broken, would lead to a world of turned noses and judgment. So I disengaged.

So as the announcement of Pope Francis’s papacy came, the news junkie in me started to read up. Jesuit. Champions social justice issues with a focus on poverty. I’m intrigued. Says, “Who am I to judge” as it applies to gays while in Brazil – Say what? Gets interviewed by the Reverend that was fired by Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger and ignites buzzwords like “theology of women.”

[FS]

Feminist Fires Emilie Townes, Religious Leader Major Works: - Womanist Ethics and the Cultural Production of Evil (2006) - Breaking the Fine Rain of Death: African American Health Issues and a Womanist Ethic of Care (2006) - In a Blaze of Glory: Womanist Spirituality as Social Witness (1995) - A Troubling in My Soul: Womanist Perspectives on Evil and Suffering (1993) - Womanist Justice, Womanist Hope (1993)

Inspired by: Townes is inspired by the burgeoning womanist theology, which, used by Alice Walker to define the intersectional black feminists or women of color, has helped Townes to reexamine the “cultural production of evil” through an ethical, cultural, and theological theory base. More specifically, in relation to her inspiration for her works on the “cultural production evil,” Townes was inspired by the Black Clergywomen of the United Methodist Church and the Women in Leadership in Theological Education of the Association of Theological Schools in the United States and Canada, in which the conversation amongst these women have sparked her clarification and research into metaphorical evil. Additionally, her students have allowed her to further spark ideas in her research. “Two generations of the Theological and Social Ethics Methods Seminar...and the Metaphors of Evil course at Yale Divinity School brought new insights to my work…” (Womanist Ethics and the Cultural Production of Evil, 2006).

Inspires: She is an inspiration to intersectional and progressive approaches to religion, as well as to the Initiative on Religion and Politics at Yale University, which she is the founding member of. She has further influenced Yale’s progressive outlook on religion and color by creating the Middle Passage Conversations on Black Religion in the African Diaspora Initiative at Yale.

Personal Life: Having recently married her same-sex partner in the state of Connecticut, Townes, in a 2012 article she wrote for the Huffington Post, stated that she is an advocate for gay marriage (and what marriage stands for in general) and emphasizing God’s love for those who focus on humanity (“Gay Marriage and Religion: What Marriage Means to Me,” 2012).

Importance to Social Justice: Townes’ research has focused the stereotypes of black women in culture over time and the social/cultural production of race as an “uninterrogated coloredness.” She attempts to, with a womanist leaning, reexamine “old categories of skin color” through her works. Her teaching on Christian theology, womanist approaches, and cultural studies, provides an intersectional approach to feminism by emphasizing the triple oppression of race, class, and gender. Additionally, Townes is a promoter of moving back and forth between the academic realm and the outside, where words can be put to action.

broadsides Expressions in poetry via street literature style

Gentile Passover Ben Briggs

This year there would be no Easter, I wore my Sunday’s best on a Saturday.

I sat on a pillow and listened.

She gave me parsley and salt water, which must have been an acquired taste.

She broke pieces of the huge saltine crackers, And we shared a tradition that outdated Peeps by millennia.

This year would have no Cadbury Eggs, Plastic Grass, Or Pastel colored polos.

I shared a culture, and I understood more about her.

I kissed her on the forehead, “I really liked this thing”.

I mouthed the Hebrew words as she read them, I had no four questions that the Exodus was interesting, We celebrated and ate a soup with a bread ball in it.

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Despite alcohol consumption laws, thirteen and up were given wine.

I drank the recommended four cups.

Emma Steiber

Queer Thoughts A Transgressive Approach

A Sacrificial Awakening

Although I practice the traditions on certain high holidays, I often wonder what exactly made me turn around from Judaism as a weekly and daily practice.

When I spoke at the podium during my Bat Mitzvah about nine years ago, I was almost thirteen and had yet to have my period. And yet I was a woman in the eyes of my synagogue and its Jewish community. I sang in Hebrew, the words of which I did not understand, and I spoke of the theme/subject for my coming-of-age celebration—sacrifice. Sacrifice was emphasized in the Old Testament as a way to give to and honor God. In Leviticus, it states that one must not sacrifice and offer “blemished” animals, to salt these animals, and to sacrifice in specified areas. I was to explain offerings to the Jewish community on my day into “adulthood,” as if I understood what it meant.

But I did not understand it, so I applied it to my life. I told the Jewish community how I interpreted sacrifice in my life and what I had sacrificed. But what I was really thinking in my head at the time was, “My parents sacrificed their marriage and yet I felt like the burnt offering.” In my thirteen year-old mind, my parents bitter court issues were all I could think about. And, most importantly, I was blindly following a God that was ingrained into my head as a dirty, old man who accepted the awful treatment of women and tested men by tricking them into almost sacrificing their sons atop a mountain. I felt tainted and pressured by the beliefs of God. Retrospectively, that day seems to exemplify a burial of God. In Judges 19, Ephraim’s unnamed concubine from Bethlehem in Judah ran away from him to return to her father. Yet Ephraim came to reclaim her. Upon their return from Bethlehem, they stopped overnight at Gibeah where no one offered a place for them to stay, except for one man. However, the men of the city disliked this act of kindness and came to the man’s home to take Ephraim away. As a male guest, the master of the house gave an alterative offering.

“Here my virgin daughter and his concubine; let me bring them out not. Ravish them and do whatever you want to them; but against this man do not do such a vile thing…They wantonly raped her, and abused her all through the night until the morning.” The unnamed concubine became the sacrifice and, after reading this passage, I questioned my faith in Judaism, a religion that practiced sacrifice on animals and women.

Originally, Adam and Lilith were created from the earth and from the same source, thus being equals.

When Adam demanded subservience, Lilith, being equal to Adam, rejected his commands and left. And thus, from Adam’s rib, came the submissive Eve. These are stories to me and were never solidified as history. I could not grasp them as otherwise, for it seemed that the stories were written as a product of patriarchal rule. However, although Lilith may only be a metaphor, she signifies the equality of all lives and the devaluing of gender roles. Eve was a male ideal, but, to me, Lilith exemplifies humanness and the earth as our source of creation.

In Judith Plaskow’s feminist theological work, “The Coming of Lilith: Toward a Feminist Theology,” an attempt at revisioning patriarchal Hebraic texts into a feminist-centered realm was made. “Since stories are the heart of tradition, we could question and create tradition by telling a new story within the framework of an old one.” Although Plaskow’s emphasis on reasserting feminist empowerment is critical to theological inclusion, I still find myself at odds with the Jewish religion. I hold no importance to these stories, for they are just stories to me. They were all those times I went to Hebrew school.

Although I will not return to Judaism in practice, I wish I could return to the altar, with the Torah laid out in front of me, and restate my idea of sacrifice.

Feeling more an adult then before, I would state, “Women have been the sacrifices of men in the passages of Judaism and this, all being a creation from the patriarchal normative standards of the time, is false and made up to me. If I could truly find one character in all of the Hebraic texts, Lilith would be my idol, for then I would fly away from this all.” I am no longer just a female now. I am a queer being who has found love and attraction in both males and females. I am not an unnamed sacrifice, rather I am the revisioned Lilith, born evolutionarily from the same source as man, and who has chosen to turn away from God, Adam, and the creationism of religion. If that makes me a “demon of the night,” so be it.

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“You’re such a bad Jew,” is the common response given to me when I cannot explain to them the entire meaning and process of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. I mean, I do know that they are tied in with the New Year and celebrate looking forward, but could I give you the step-by-step guide to a proper Yom Kippur celebration? No. Do I fast and only eat unleavened bread when necessary for a certain holiday? No. I stopped going to classes at the synagogue Tuesdays and Sundays when I had my Bat-Mitzvah at the age of thirteen, and I stopped going to high holidays when my mother couldn’t afford the price of tickets (and my lack of enthusiasm for it).

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WLA (Re)Animated Artifacts from the Women & Leadership Archives

Art Works: Liturgical

Commentary: Earning a scholarship to attend Mundelein College, Virginia Broderick pursued art and literary avenues, and graduated with a Bachelor of Fine Arts in 1939. Influenced by and an inspiration to the Christian community, the above artwork highlights such influential religious work. The artwork of Martin de Porres, the lay brother of the Dominican Order who was blessed in 1837 by Pope Gregory XVI and canonized in 1962 by Pope John XXIII, further signifies and honors his role as the patron saint of mixed-raced societies and the seeker of interracial harmony.

WLA Mission Statement: Established in 1994, the Women and Leadership Archives (WLA) collects, preserves, organizes, describes, and makes available materials of enduring value to researches studying women’s contributions to society.

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Description: Artwork created by Virginia Broderick of St. Martin de Porres.

Gaby Ortiz Flores

Radical (Self) Love An act you do for yourself is an act of Love.

The Beginning “…feelings like disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy, and fear, instead of being bad news, are actually very clear moments that teach us where it is that we’re holding back. They teach us to perk up and lean in when we feel we’d rather collapse and back away. They’re like messengers that show us, with terrifying clarity, exactly where we’re stuck. This very moment is the perfect teacher, and, lucky for us, it’s with us wherever we are.” ― Pema Chödrön

I believe in prayer. I believe in spells which for many are prayers. I believe in asking. I believe in faith. I believe in miracles. I believe in love.

It’s May 2005 and my body is pressed against the full length mirror of the coat closet door. I am crying. I am trying to do it as quietly as possible to not alarm anyone. I have just hung up the phone with my then boyfriend wishing that I could tell him what’s happening. But I can’t and I don’t. I am scared that people people will judge my family, that no one will understand, and that no one will even

care. I don’t know what to do so I do the only thing I can do. I pray.

no me desampares ni de noche ni de día

I pray to God that a miracle will happen and my mother will get better. I have started to formulate a plan for how I will help my dad raise my sister. I have no idea how I will also take care of my mother. Will she have to be hospitalized? I can’t bear the thought of my mother in a hospital, my mother drugged up, my mother tied down. I can’t bear the idea of my mother being gone. But she is gone.

I say the only part of the prayer that I ever remember. I ask my guardian angels (I have always believed that I have two--I have been so lucky and blessed after all.) for help. I ask them to stay with me and to never leave my side and I ask them to advocate for me and make my case to God. And it is only after I have prayed to them that I feel better.

I pray to God for hope because I don’t understand what is happening because every time I look into my mother’s eyes, I see the eyes of a stranger. It’s as if someone replaced my mother. It’s her body but she is not there. The strong, loving, fierce woman is not there. I don’t know who she is only that I miss her and want her to come back.

I pray that all the anger inside me be taken from me because I am angry. I am angry at my mother for leaving me. I am angry that the responsibility of the family has fallen on my shoulders. I am angry that I am not back on my college campus enjoying my last few weeks as a senior. I am angry that she did not take better care of herself. I am angry at myself for having all of these thoughts.

I pray that all of her pain is transferred into me. I tell God to please give me her pain because I somehow believe that if her pain is transferred into me, that she will be okay and that she will come back to me.

I don’t know if God had heard me because I never pray to him. So I turn to my guardian angels, my spiritual guides, the beings that have always protected me. I say the prayer in Spanish like I have recited since I was a little girl--the only Catholic prayer that ever deeply resonated with me.

Angel de mi guarda, dulce compañía,

A week later after a spiritual cleansing, after a trip to the doctor, and after the longest week of my life I know my prayers have been answered. My mother is slowing reawakening, is slowly returning to me.

I don’t know if it was the spiritual cleansing, or the trip to the doctor, or just my prayers. I don’t know why she has come back to me.

I ask her months later why she came back and she told me that she came back because of me. She said that she was in a black hole but sometimes she could hear and see me and what she saw and heard was me crying. She said that I looked so sad. She did not want me to be sad. She said she remembered not wanting leave my sister alone. She said she came back for us.

I believe in love. I believe that love brought my mother back. I believe that my prayers were answered--something out in the universe heard me. Or so I’d like to believe.

So, it seems like this story has a happy ending, right?

My mother comes out of her psychosis and all is well in the world.

Except that there’s a reason that my mother had a mental breakdown. My mother’s break from reality exposed a flaw prevalent amongst the women in my family--we don’t know how to love or care for ourselves. My mother had a break down not because she wasn’t a strong woman but rather because she had taken on too much and didn’t know how to say no, how to ask for help, or how to take care of herself. At the core of all this was her belief that she did not deserve the love, care, and assistance that she bestowed on others.

This realization set me set me off on a journey to seek and embrace self-love, healing, and wellness.

It was frontier that no woman in my family had ever explored. Self-love? There’s a radical idea.

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I pray to God for guidance because I don’t know how to help my mother. She keeps shouting and hiding. Is she possessed? Does she need a spiritual cleansing? Does she need therapy? How can she go to therapy is none of the things she is saying make sense? How can she talk about what happened to her when she experiencing hallucinations and delusions? Maybe she really is possessed and I need to take her to church….

words are useless expression/commentary through art

Design Aesthetic Freestyle Writing Reel Watch: https://vimeo.com/22059242

Artist: Michelle Graves Words from the Artist:

What does it mean to be alive? What does it mean to have thoughts contemplating the things that happen in our lives?

Within fascination is passion. Within passion, one can find motivation.

Any of these things do not come without struggle, however. Jean Paul Sartre, existential philosopher, explains that ther acknowledge life. Within the struggle of everyday life are the experiences that are worth contemplating.

Failures can become successes if they are processed and not ignored. How does one find the motivation to face ones fai ment in this process is time. Within time, there is movement. Even if our bodies are still, time continues to pass. There ourselves. It is up to the individual to find movement, motivation and a momentum for what they are passionate about

Movement Motivation Momentum

The experiences of living, of breathing, of feeling my own heartbeat, or someone else’s heartbeat, are fascinating.

re can not be a positive without a negative. The Buddha explains that through acknowledging death, one can truly

ilures head on, with a passion for learning from the mistakes, with a passion for bettering oneself? One inevitable elee is movement outside the window, in the world. In existence, we as individuals are a part of something bigger than in their world. I chose to move, breathe, think, feel, create and share freely in the time and space my body exists in.

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Watch: https://vimeo.com/36210001

Southern Belle & Jasmine Revolution

Oh Sh*t Now Overcoming Toxicity in Relationships

Southern Belle: There were nights, long, tense, rough nights full of waiting. Waiting and hoping that our fighting would cease. Hoping so hard that positivity would return, our bliss of rolling intensities with intimacy and understanding and bold connection. But alas, dark dense hours would pass so very slow.

The fighting was awful. The words violent. The screaming marred with red eyes, dry throats, and odd spittle. Names, mean disparaging names, were launched like weapons with stinging psychological impact. Doors were slammed into shaky frames.

Things around the house were hurled and broken.

Accusations and justifications were tossed back and

forth.

Hours passed, and my faith fell. My faith in people, that is. I am not a praying person. Yet I’m positive and enthusiastic. I hold onto a deep belief that people are good, and mean well, and harm one another as an option when scarred, scared, fearful, and lost.

But it was nights like those, with terrible fighting and abuse, where I’d really wonder, deeply to my inner core, might the spirits help me? Would it protect us, me? If I exclaimed in agony, “Oh, God,” who would hear me? Did your faith or religion help or harm you in your abusive relationship? In mine, my main faith in people seemed to go so far as a fault.

That was 2009 before the peak of misery. Then again it had always been miserable with moments of bliss, like a drug that takes you to far off heights only to plunge you into hell when it finally wears off. In 2009 I did not know that the universe was leaving me a clue. The large portrait of Kali was a clue, a clue to my future, an instrument in my eventual liberation. In 2011 during my final days as his girlfriend, I watched as crowds marched with their grand and colorful statues of Kali during Kali Puja.

She was everywhere, in every color, peaking out at me, daring me to take action. I remember praying to her then. I did not know then if my prayers would be answered and perhaps this is why I cannot even remember my exact words. I only remember the desperation of my prayers and the need to keep on believing that everything comes to pass for a reason. Kali (or the Universe?) eventually answered my prayers but not before I suffered as she had.

Only then did she manifest in my life so clearly, so vividly with so much strength. She and Kwan Yin, the Buddhist goddess of compassion became the instruments that the universe placed in my path to assist me in liberating myself. What beliefs kept you alive, kept you moving, kept you going in those times during your relationship and after when things felt the coldest and the darkest?

Southern Belle: “Things happen for a reason.” I heard that a lot... from friends, from loved ones, from people who wanted me to feel better so very much. I heard it from myself, actually. But what was the reason I would ask? To make me stronger? To teach me life lessons that only hardship might offer? To show me tough love?

I can be a very dark person. Indeed, I love the night. I reach for blackness- to be enveloped by it, to not be seen or heard, to be blanketed and unknown. Perhaps what balances my often positive

and easy approach to life is what people don’t often know about me- I see and feel life for the dualities it brings: the light and dark, the love and hate, the peace and violence, the energy and stall, the connect and disconnect.

What resounds, after a good amount of time away from my ex partner, is what happened to me? I think my faith in both myself and others fell away.

Each and every time my ex put me down, put me down in every way they knew would crush me, my layers of me fell away. Those layers were replaced by numbness. That numbness resulted in guards.

Layers of guards.

I guard myself these days. I think that is what has really allowed me to keep going. It is sad, and I know it. I really don’t let people in. I pull it together, me, that is, and charge ahead as before. But what others don’t see is when I move deeper into myself.

The many moments I fall away- fall away into me.

But yet what is me? After those many years of being questioned all the time, being chastised, being reprimanded, being yelled at, being put down, of living in fear, I find myself living, still, with numbness, guards, and darkness.

Is it odd to say that darkness saved me? Perhaps. I do know, as before in my life, that if I ceased living today, I would be okay with it. Not because I am sad. But because I lived, because I tried, and because it mattered to me. When I think back to the depravity of my relationship, and how even death seemed more welcoming and warm, I remind myself that, then, I was deeply in love. My faith was in my ex, in our love, even through our problems.

I still find great power in the warmth of the dark, of the negative, of the scary, only to be stunned in awe of the beauty and electricity of life and love. The push and pull of these keeps me going. And this, it seems, is where I find my gods.

You seem, like me, to be balanced in dark and light.

Tell me more about the dark you have felt and how light impacted you. And, like me, did you bury your faith far in someone who tried to bury you?

Jasmine Revolution: My darkness….I used to think I was a monster. I had so much rage that it spilled out into my life attacking anyone and everyone who came near. My ex and I fell in love in my darkest hour. My deadliest sin at that point would have been wrath. I told him

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Jasmine Revolution: I remember hot, balmy days in Calcutta pacing up and down the cold tile of his family’s apartment.

Alone. I remember the picture of his dead grandfather staring back at me. His warm eyes and kind smile giving me hope. I had lost all hope in 2011. I remember walking with him hand in hand through the Victoria Memorial, through an exhibit on the various Hindu gods and goddesses. Kali calling my name from a large portrait--her many arms outstretched, her tongue sticking out in shame. Kali was fierce and though she had done much to regret, she had a fierceness that awed and frightened me.

to stay away. He liked my darkness, I think because it resonated with his own darkness. I felt numb when I met him. I was numb to the people I loved.

I have always been sensitive—this extra sense of feeling what others feel. Being numb was like someone cutting off my hand. I could not function without my feelings and I could not function with the only feelings I was having—rage, frustration and shame. When I eventually started feeling again…he was the only one left standing. He must love me and I loved him for staying. He stayed through my worst—this must be love.

I have a fantastic imagination. I have, for example, imagined at least a thousand ways that I could die. I remember asking my ex once, “Doesn’t everyone think like this?” He shook his head, disturbed. I did not tell him that I imagined my death every time he was angry at me. I also did not tell him that every time he was distant and pulled away, that I imagined the dozens of critical illnesses or accidents I wish I could have because I believed that the realization that he might lose me forever would bring him back to me. “If you killed yourself”, he said, “it would be the most selfish thing you could do. It would destroy everyone who loves you.” There were moments when he was right.

He was right. My suicide would certainly affect the people around me. I could not and would not ever follow through with it for that reason. I could not return to the numbness. So, I stayed locked in my mind.

I remember crying nearly every day of our relationship—part of me believing it was normal and the other part feeling like something may not quite be right.

I automatically thought there MUST be something wrong with me. He agreed. There was always talk in our relationship on how to “fix me.” I needed fixing because I was not quite right. Remember the wrath?

Faith? I had no faith in myself. I couldn’t be trusted, he believed. So I didn’t trust myself. I remember during our arguments, the room would spin and the world would stop making sense. I felt like Alice in Wonderland falling down a black hole that was never ending. I could not fight him. I had no idea how and he admittedly liked to fight dirty so why even try. I would lose at any cost. So I accepted everything he said that I was. Darkness….my darkness was never as strong as his. He was far darker, full of so much anger, resentment, and frustration. Yet, he was calm. He never yelled. Just calmly told me all the wrong I was. I was the pessimistic one, he said. I must be, I thought.

I love the Katy Perry song “Roar” because as simplistic as the lyrics are—they ring true for me…

I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath Scared to rock the boat and make a mess So I sat quietly, agreed politely I guess that I forgot I had a choice I let you push me past the breaking point I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything It was the light of others who patiently and lovingly helped me rediscover my light carefully tucked away deep inside. I had saved it for a rainy day, but I had forgotten it, so even though it’d been pouring for years, it was forgotten. It was my friends and family and colleagues who share their light (their umbrellas?) with me, who strengthened me. He said I was pessimistic but I never stopped believing in the goodness of others. If I had, I would have left him years ago because I would have seen what he really was— darkness. He thought vulnerability, compassion, and forgiveness were weaknesses; I disagree. I don’t know if it’s my lightness or my stubbornness but I will never let the darkness win again.

What will it take for you to peel away the guards?

Southern Belle: That is such an important question. I am constantly searching, for me, for others, for what I seemed to lose over many years, for what my ex ripped from me with fear, violence, shaming, and anger. I sometimes look inward and even seem to be guarding, well, me from me.

People like you, who have beaming inner light that is obvious but guarded too are bringing my light back. I crave to return to my people, and by that I mean the family and friends and colleagues who genuinely build me up and love me for me. I need that type of support so bad right now. I need others to remind me of what makes me special, the parts of me that my ex harmed and buried.

So I end with this, then, a message to you, a reminder to my self, and a call to all readers: seek, find, and give time and energy to those who help you be you, to those that love you for all that you are; and if and when others attack your unique selves, run fast, back into the protective and understanding layers of those that make you a better you.

words are useless expression/commentary through art

Artist: Andra Samelson Description:

The world’s two tallest standing statues of Buddha were destroyed on March 11, 2001 in Bamiyan, Afghanistan by the fundamentalist Taliban rulers. These statues were of tremendous importance to the cultural heritage of Afghanistan. Their destruction was not just an eradication of ancient beauty and inspiration but also a savage act of censorship and intolerance. This event was met with worldwide condemnation and was a sad harbinger of the violence to come exactly six months later in America on September 11. In response to both these tragic events, I created a body of work to give remembrance to the splendor and peace of these two towering Buddhas.

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Shahmama

J. Curtis Main

Inside R Out? White? Male? Feminist? YES

Mr. Clean Was My God

I imagined Mr. Clean. I am not lying, I really did!

For some reason I do not know now, I thought God looked like Mr. Clean, with his big smile, bald head, earrings, big muscles, and most of all, the light and cleanliness he had to offer. Can you tell I liked to clean growing up? I did!

But my faith in Mr. Clean did not last long. Maybe it was when they released the new lemon scented Mr. Clean and lemon is not next to godliness in my book. Don’t get me wrong, I like lemons, but not that much.

I have never read much of the Bible. In tenth grade, we had to read the story of creation, and it seemed a bit simple and magical to me, as if one of my friends got high and shared their rendition of how the world was created. Seven is a nice number.

My best friend Brandon used to have a Bible with pictures in it in his Mom’s Black Branco growing up.

I spent most of my time with Brandon. I loved him and his family. Even though they always managed to invite me to Church, I only went once, and my white skin felt more on stage than the fact that it was the first time I chose to go to church on my own in my life.

Betty’s Bible picture book fascinated me. Not because I read it... but because I thought the pictures were so very beautiful. And, in White America, I found the brown and black faces to be more, well, friendly and interesting. I wanted to get to know them. But did I ever read it in the back of their Bronco? Nope. I had Betty, Brandy, Keisha, and Monica, they were more interesting. And I learned so much from them. Not from their Bible with pictures, but from their everyday.

I like to plan for the worst and the best. I start with the best, then make sure the worst would be okay if it happens, then I shift back to the best. Yet since I was in my teens, I don’t really think past death. If death comes close, which it has many times, I am not quickly thinking of meeting some maker, or sins, or angels, or fiery red devils. I move forward with living now.

If others die in my life, and they have, such as my grandparents except my one grandpa, I do not imagine them chillin with God or in the sky or in a heaven or whatnot; I imagine them as they were, as I knew them, as we shared life. If I get to make new memories with them again one day, I welcome it wholeheartedly. But if not, the time we had was what it was, and I am grateful and do my best to remember memories and feelings.

If I went to a Church, or Synagogue, or Mosque, or any place of worship right now, I would be distracted by people. I would watch them, listen to them, want to ask them questions, enjoy food together, enjoy one another. If there were a name for practicing a faith in people, I might identify as it. But there is not, so my faith and belief gets cast as agnostic or atheist or simply “other,” and most often that is fine.

When it is not fine, it is annoying or disrespectful, as if I am not a faithful, committed, ethical person. I try to be. I have morals, plenty! I have respect and love and understanding for others; I try!

But as far as the afterlife, or afterdeath, or simply that mystery I sometimes ponder, I don’t bother with it much. Some might, and that is okay. Some have ideas on what happens, and this is okay. For me, what has seemed to work is the here and now and what I know, and I hope that is okay. Is that okay with you?

So when the time comes, and it can come when it does, and several times should have come and didn’t, I am okay. If something happens after my body ceases, I suppose I am in for a surprise. If nothing happens, I will not know. If I meet some sort of fiery angry Devil, I will have a lot of questions. If I meet some sort of angelic all knowing God, I will have a lot of questions! And until then, I will have a lot of questions!

And if I meet Mr. Clean? I will wash my sins away. :)

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Back in the day, I liked the idea of God. A lot. I would imagine what he would look and feel like. I imagined peace, and light, and warmth, and a wise old white man like many of the books and stories and adults told me to imagine.

Career Call Learn About the Workplace

Youth Direct Andy

1) Describe your job and its duties in one paragraph.

[AT] My job is to help shape the lives of students in grades 6-12 and their families. To plan and lead programs that help young people understand their faith and how to live it out. Projects that touch the lives of many in need. Helping them express God’s love to everyone. I also am involved in the planning and leading of worship services.

2) Why did you get the job?

[AT] I got the job from my experience in the field and love for students. I am an ordained pastor and to the United Methodist Church.

I relate

3) How did you get the job (online app, in person, nomination, etc.)?

[AT] A friend of mine knew they were looking and thought I would be a good fit. I decided to apply and had in person interviews after a telephone interview as I was 3 hours away. Job was also posted online.

4) Did you hear about the job through word of mouth? If so, by whom?

[AT] Yes. I heard about it from another friend of mine who is a Youth Director.

5) Did you have help getting the job by inside recommendations?

[AT] No, but it would have been helpful.

6) Are you using or did you use some of your education for the job?

[AT] Yes. I have an undergraduate degree in Marketing and some masters work in Divinity.

7) Is this a job for the long-term? Why or why not?

[AT] Yes, it is a long term job some, but not for others. Some see it as a stepping stone into being a Senior Pastor and others realize it is their calling. Also it requires many hours of work, can be really stressful, and you must stay current on youth culture. Some people in my field burn out because of this and don’t stay long term, however I have been in it for 11 years on staff and 17 years total if you include the years I volunteered in that role.

8) Does the job and employer reinforce current social conditions or try to change them? How? Your thoughts?

[AT] The United Methodist Church as a whole is very active in social justice. Students are taught at a young age to help those in need and love everyone as God teaches us. We teach them to advocate for issues they believe in and do it in love. We are involved in projects that help the poor, widow(er)s, sick, homeless, and more.

I believe this age group can be a catalyst of future change in our society.

9) What are the strengths of the job?

[AT] Flexibility. As long as you do your work, most people in my field have flexibility of hours. You also have the ability to impact lives of young people and their families which is my passion.

10) Weaknesses?

[AT] I work a minimum of 50 hours a week. Late night phone calls, texts, FB, Twitter, Snapchats. Work all Sunday’s but 2 a year and it is normally a 12-14 hour day.

tor, Ministry: Tuttle 11) Would you recommend this job to others?

[AT] Yes. If you have a passion for young people and families, as well as a love of God. It is very fulfilling.

12) What would you do differently with this position?

[AT] Spend more time focusing outside the church building and more in the community and schools. I have already been making that change.

13) Describe the people above you in terms of Socioeconomic Status. Do the same for the people below you.

[AT] Ordained elders in the UMC make about 2x what I do. General staff make slightly less.

14) What level of survival and comfort did/do the benefits/pay allow?

[AT] If you take this position for the pay/benefits, I encourage you to look elsewhere. Average salary in this area is around $36,000. It would meet most basic of needs, but for a family would need a good second income.

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15) Share your most memorable experience(s) from the position; good, bad, funny, and ugly!

[AT] One of my most memorable experiences was taking juniors/seniors in high school on a mystery trip to the mountains. We went to a special place called Crossnore School and spent the afternoon hanging out with students that have had major issues in their lives. We took them gift cards as well. Most of the kids had been abused in some way or given up on by their parents. Everyone was moved by this experience. The kids said that no one comes to see them and they didn’t think anyone else really cared. The gift cards also gave them a chance to get off campus for a shopping trip which was a big deal. Lives on both sides were changed that day and we are continuing to reach out to them.

Middle Eastern Musings Abeer Allan

A Dive Into The Dead Sea

Spirituality and You I was at work when my colleague mentioned that his wife practices Mudras, that was a new term that sounded catchy to me, so I asked him about it and he gave me a briefing -which sounded interesting but yet I didn’t really understand it. So one thing hit my mind right away and the words were already rushed out “I would like to interview her and know more and maybe write about it, is that possible?”

Kusum Gogia an Indian young woman who can change your life using the techniques of Mudra. I got to interview her and I must tell you the time passed by so fast, a very interesting personality with a lot of information to learn about.

“Spirituality, yoga and meditation are practices that kept me calm and helped me through my life. I feel very lucky that this runs in the family as both of my

parents practice yoga and meditation which is how I was exposed to all of this.” Kusum said on how she started her work.

Having this practiced in the family, Kusum has learned to use her energy “in the proper direction, such as reading cards to help people, or practicing meditation and spirituality trying to keep a positive atmosphere.”

I asked her about the most frequent questions she gets “Most of my female clients ask about losing weight, how to look good and how to have a bright skin” she said “and I take my work very seriously when people come to me and ask about certain things in their life, as I consider it to be a part of my learning process as well.”

Kusum focuses on health aspects in her practices “I believe health is very important; if you have a lot of money and you are not healthy then you won’t be happy, so I use Mudra -Mudra is a Sanskrit word which means gesture or attitude, to focus on health, it’s not even time consuming. it is simple and easy to practice Mudra to get healthier, such as improving your sight, losing weight and getting a glowing skin.”

the support of her husband, and will always want to learn more about Mudra to be able to use it for health healings as she believes “Happiness is not on the outside, it is within us”.

Briefing Prithvi Mudra:- Mudras are easy to perform at anytime; although mudras can be used for healing certain ailments, regular practice of mudras will contribute to your overall good health and can be used as a preventive measure.

Description: Place the tip of the ring finger on top of the tip of the thumb. Extend all the other fingers and keep them comfortably straight as possible.

Steps: Mudras are to be performed with both hands at the same time, unless otherwise specified.

Do as needed, or use 3 times a day for 15 minutes.

Fingers should remain comfortable during the procedure and not held stiffly or tight.

Benefits: Glowing Skin, Increases energy, Strengthen body and mind.

How did people react to Mudra and what you do?

“I faced some difficulties and criticism but I am lucky to have a supportive family who encouraged me and helped me improve my skills and keep doing this.”

“One of the “funny” difficulties I faced is how I used to feel embarrassed at first when the session was over” she continued “it used to feel awkward for me to tell the client “time is up” but with time I managed to learn how to do that.”

Kusum’s husband, Abhinit Gogia, joined us in the interview, and I wanted to get a second opinion on how Mudra can make a difference in someone’s life so I took my chance and asked him “It changed my life, I was a negative person before I met her” he explained “but she managed to use her healing techniques to clean away the negativity in my mind.”

Kusum said she will continue her practices with

To contact Kusum: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Spirituality-You/461662867194486?ref=ts&fref=ts

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Is a physical appearance mandatory for you to be able to help your clients?

“I would prefer that because it would be more useful, but it is not mandatory as I have clients from all over the world, they contact me through Facebook or Skype to help them in various aspects in their lives.”

Patrick Fina

Over the Rainbow Exploring a rich and diverse q-munity

Two Men Can Go On a Date to Mass

Well, I should clarify – he stood me up, but considering I was still there and engaged (albeit quite bitterly), it counts in my book. Plus, I’ll take the sting of rejection any day over what the penance must be for standing someone up at church.

I mentioned it to a few friends, who were more surprised and confused about the fact that two men could go on a date together to mass, rather than the fact he was a no-show.

It was a reaction that made me do some deep reflecting – truth be told, I didn’t see how my spirituality and faith could somehow be usurped by the fact that I identified within the LGBTQ community. I knew it was something that had posed a challenge to me in the past, but I didn’t really understand why, or even how I had worked through it.

Fast forwarding a couple years, I found myself reading Kate Bornstein’s “Hello, Cruel World: 101 Alternatives to Suicide for Teens, Freaks, & Other Outlaws.” Early on in the book, Bornstein talks about spirituality and gender. The Talmud – one of the holiest works in Judaism, as Bornstein tells it, “places value on multiple interpretations of a single concept.” I marked that passage two different ways so I wouldn’t lose its page.

While I was not raised Jewish, nor am I very familiar with the Talmud, the notion of exploration and interpretation really resonated with me, spiritually speaking. Rather than just saying “well, here’s a part of who I am, okay, let’s move on,” the idea that exploring who you are intrinsically as a part of spirituality was a concept that seemed incredibly accurate to what I imagine all of us do in some way. Bornstein went on later to suggest that exploring identities like your gender can be seen as a spiritual exercise all their own.

Truth be told, I have a lot of exploring to do – as a white, cisgender gay man in the LGBTQ community, I have far more power and privilege than most.

Even looking at the front-running issues of LGBTQ political organizations, it’s all focused on marriage equality - even though many states, organizations, and employers lack non-discriminatory clauses that include actual and/or perceived gender identities and/or expressions but include ones that cover actual and/or perceived orientation.

Looking ahead as I explore my own identity, I found an interview with Bornstein that seemed to summarize a lot of what I was feeling and trying to articulate. When asked about the “greatest challenge facing feminism today” by Anna Sterling, Bornstein ended with this thought: “In the 80s, the big battle was with feminists welcoming queers into their ranks. Now, it’s reversed.

The queers are extending a welcoming hand to feminists. I hope they take our hand. Can you imagine a real live coalition of kick-ass feminists and kickass queers? It’s already happening, and that’s what makes me an optimist.”

Truth be told, I have a long way to go before I can consider myself a kick-ass feminist or a kick-ass queer – but looking at exploring both parts of those identities and how they pertain to me in a spiritual lens makes it that much more important, and leaves me pretty optimistic. While I don’t have a wellformed preamble of what my religion and spirituality mean to me, I can tell you they absolutely mean supporting all who embody missions that emulate social justice and actively challenging the structures that limit them.

Truth moment: I’m re-reading this and adding some length because I was a bit short on the length I wrote (sorry again, editors). But I’m glad because I left out an important aspect that was asked of me in a dialogue this week. It’s a simple question, but one that can go really deep.

“So, what are you going to do?”

In other words, awesome, yeah, identities intersect and all that jazz. But here’s the tough part – we have to acknowledge that when we talk about one identity, we bring the others we have with it. I can’t talk about being Catholic (well to be honest, more like Catholic-ish) just through a Catholic frame – I also bring my gender identity, my orientation, my education, and a whole gamut of other things that are intertwined, connected, and knotted together like that pair of headphones I lost in my desk for over a year.

Being a part of a “q-munity” requires actively addressing this and not just acknowledging it – especially for next issue, where the topic is LGBT IQ’s.

So, what are we going to do?

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I once went on a first date with a guy I really liked to Mass.

By Jane P. Currie

Ex Bibliothecis From Loyola’s Libraries to you. Assisting you in your search for information.

Spirituality & Religion Discovered by Reading & Watching

A list of recent books about personal experiences with religion and spirituality accompanied the last BROAD issue with this theme and so I’ve added a few new titles and suggest that you look to it for a title or two that might inspire your own journey.

A faculty member in the Department of Theology and Religious Studies recently reminded me of a book titled How to Be a Perfect Stranger: A Guide to Etiquette in Other People’s Religious Ceremonies which led me to think about how we can discover other religions before we attend a service or make a visit. One way is to consult World Religions Online*, an electronic resource that contains video clips from religious ceremonies and conversations with followers. Content organization includes Topic Centers that bring together many source types, all related to a single religious or spiritual tradition. I encourage you to browse through World Religions Online and see what you can discover.

If you find a tradition, thinker, or text that you’d like to know more about, you may learn much more in a number of research databases and in our library’s book collections. For assistance with any source, you are welcome to write to jcurrie@luc.edu.

* This resource is accessible on-campus or off-campus to students, faculty, and staff after log-in with a Loyola Universal ID and password.

URLs for the links above: https://luclibrary.worldcat.org/profiles/jcurrie/lists/3056502 http://luclibrary.worldcat.org/oclc/33008866 http://flagship.luc.edu/login?url=http://wro.factsonfile.com/world-religions-online.aspx

A Convert’s Journey: The Long and Winding Road Jill Kreider

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Faith & Spirituality

All my life, I failed to see the glory or feel the religious fervor that my Catholic family felt in church.

Despite the beauty of the cathedrals, the smell of incense, or even the slightly bitter but pleasing taste of Communion wine, Catholicism never felt right to me. In the past several years, I converted from one religion to another, namely a loosely practiced Roman Catholicism to Hellenistic Paganism, i.e. worship of the Ancient Greek Gods. Understandably it seems like quite a leap, but honestly it wasn’t. I also understand the risk that ‘outing’ myself as any-

ter and I attended catechism was because my grandmother insisted we be educated in the family’s religion. While as a child that was not an issue, as I grew older, I realized that Christianity was not my chosen religious path and so I quit the sacramental procedure. To this day I am still not recognized technically as an adult in the Catholic Church as I have never been confirmed. My mother was less than pleased about my reticence to officially join and become a part of the church. I learned to deal with my mildly Agnostic viewpoints, unsure of what else there was

B

Starting with trusty Wikipedia, I learned more and more about what these religions entailed and realized that they were, to put it colloquially, freaking amazing and mostly fit my views. thing but a worshipper of the Abrahamic God may impact my scholastic and future professional life in a negative fashion, but the fact is, Pagans exist just as much as any other member of a minority religion, and through my spiritual journey, I have come to find Paganism closer to my heart than any other, and thus am willing to chance the consequences of ‘outing myself’.

Perhaps a bit of my background would be of use: I was born into a Catholic family, who through each generation became slightly less religious. My grandmother was a cradle-Catholic i.e., born and raised in the church, and of Irish descent, while my mother, not necessarily espousing the same religiousness as her family, attended Catholic high school, though her personal religious views didn’t change much in her four years there. Despite all this, the household I grew up in was fairly secular as my mother worked too much to go to church, and without the insistence/coercion of my grandmother, my sister and I wouldn’t attend Sunday service. We said grace only on holidays, and as the years went on, that became infrequent, much to the chagrin of my mother, who despite our fairly secular nature, wanted us to grow up with religion as she had. The only reason my sis-

that was not a derivative of Judeo-Christianity. Then came my research on the internet.

Oh the glory of the days where a simple Google search on ‘religion quiz’ could bring up both simple and complex quizzes designed to help figure out based on your beliefs, be they social, political or religious, what world religion you were most inclined towards. After twenty long minutes of thinking I had finished my quiz and received my results. The top result, with 100% was Neo-Paganism, a term I was loosely familiar with. The next 9 results were all in the 90 percentile range, and were different branches of paganism. Starting with trusty Wikipedia, I learned more and more about what these religions entailed and realized that they were, to put it colloquially, freaking amazing and mostly fit my views.

Then came the library visits, where I had to carefully hide books on Neo-Wicca and witchcraft from my mother while still contemplating how these ideas fit with my own personal beliefs.

For a few years I identified as Eclectic Pagan, meaning I borrowed deities or ideas from other cultures and mixed elements together to create a more ‘personalized’ religion, while still sticking to a fairly

Despite getting a solid grasp on the general idea of Paganism and its many wondrous paths, I still felt an empty spot in my Eclectic practices. And so it was back to the library. They say that the path to Hell is paved with good intentions. If that’s the case, then the path to religious conversion is paved with books and misinformation. I jumped from Neo-Wicca, to a secular form of witchcraft, to a brief flirtation with Voodoo and the Lwa, which led to Hoodoo and the magic of the American South, which led to –of all places- Ancient Greece. Indeed the myths of my childhood –the ones I knew better than any biblical story- were the very same ones calling my name a decade later. The old, familiar Gods and Goddesses were still worshipped actively around the world, and I could feel them calling my name.

There is a feeling of immense joy and wholeness that I didn’t even know existed which comes from finding the right path. My day to day life changed. During meals I prayed –silently- and offered portions of my food to the Gods in reverence and sacrifice. Even washing my hands was no longer a mundane process, but rather symbolic, by which I washed myself clean of miasma, pollution the Gods disliked, and in doing so, I became closer to them. I had never realized how religion truly should be felt until I made the firm decision to be a Hellenic polytheist. There was a feeling of rightness in my mind, body and soul at that moment which filled me with joy. I had always wondered what if felt like to be truly called to something, and now, within the course of a few years meandering down a very long and winding road, I had reached my true destiny, though it had been hidden from my site for most of the journey. Though I’ve had my ups and downs, as people of all faith or non-faith backgrounds face, I feel stronger and more confident with the likes of Athena to counsel me in my studies, Zeus to make me a better leader, or even the Muses to whom I dedicate this divinely inspired written work.

What I’ve learned from all of my research and questions is that if something doesn’t feel right, you have the freedom over yourself to try to change that. This

can range from the most mundane to the most serious issues in your life. Can’t ace those tests no matter how hard you try? Talk to someone and get some advice on different habits you could learn. Have a negative and harmful influence in your life? Leave it, or separate yourself from it as best as you can, given your situation. Changing religions has not only made me more spiritual, but also more worldly and given to looking at things in new and unexpected lights.

And with that knowledge I plan to be a guiding light when needed and to help steer those who are meandering along their own winding path as I once was to their own personal destined places, fulfilling St. Ignatius’ directive to set the world on fire in my own unique way.

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Neo-Wiccan stance. For those who are new to the Pagan community or did not even realize it existed, Neo-Wicca is a non-initiation based path which is often times practiced alone with a major focus on the Goddess, earth and nature. The history of Paganism with all its schisms and divisions is almost as confusing as the history and division of the Christian sects and could be its own book. But I digress.

[FS]

broadsides Expressions in poetry via street literature style

I was born Catholic and currently identify as Catholic, but a world of reflection exists between my childhood and now. My spiritual journey began in college as a Religious Studies major, and while living in Alaska, I had a crisis of faith, in which my spiritual journey hit its peak. This was due to two experiences happening: my work within the homeless population and the ending of a significant romantic relationship. This crisis was not whether God existed, but whether the Catholic church was the right faith community for me. Because of this question, I began attending several faith traditions and going to see a spiritual director. One of my assignments that my spiritual director gave me was to journal. My journaling quickly evolved into poetry as I struggled through this crisis.

When I was asked to be a visiting editor for BROAD magazine’s faith issue, these poems came to mind. Not these three specifically, but as I waded through my pages of good, bad, and unfinished poetic journal entries, I came upon these three. Their theme focuses upon the frailty and brokenness of our humanity because at the time, all I could concentrate on was my own brokenness. I asked questions like, What if the devil was simply a person who was broken and couldn’t be fixed and what if I’m interpreting the answers in my prayers incorrectly and how do I live God’s purpose for me?

I didn’t necessarily come to any great epiphanies, but this journey would lay the groundwork for my desire to work toward Interfaith Cooperation. Through attendance at Buddhist temples, Native American sweat lodges, and a Catholic Community comprised mainly of Koreans and Samoans, I was able to experience the importance of communicating across faith traditions. Most importantly, I found that my crisis of faith had more to do with feeling alone and distanced from family and loved ones moreso than my arguments with the Catholic Church.

Thus, finding a spiritual community allowed me to deepen my connection with God. And while I still have my theological fights (mainly in my head) with the Catholic Church, through the many conversations with my female Lutheran spiritual director, I found the beauty within it as well.

S

Series of Poems Brian Anderson

Poem 1 good intentions

causing such turmoil and unrest

you breathe cuz you must even through this heavy heavy weight

they are there just below the surface peaking above and the river cannot ignore its path nor the influence of those hard round rocks

thus in the end it doesn’t matter who is right or who is wrong it only matters that the river you stand above will split (just beyond sight) and continue on toward the sea (the ocean) something larger than this and you keep looking at the river wondering why it must split wishing it wouldn’t split why does it matter but for now it does matter and while the river looks so beautiful it is those hard round rocks that inevitably force the river apart

you breathe cuz you must even through the pain and your eyes stay on the river too long for you never realize you are alone until the sky darkens and fades to black and the northern lights dazzle, dance, and direct you away from this river toward a new place you had never imagined existed for so intent were you upon the melody of the burbling current and so after a time the weight disappears dissolves and alleviates you from the burden with your new strength you move on and on and on directionless

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that sits down on your chest and won’t leave making each breath an intense labor of love just like the last months when each moment is a trial each talk is a debate without a let up or reprieve from the unspoken discomfort of one word one word that holds so many different meanings

broadsides Expressions in poetry via street literature style

Poem 2 a broken man’s vision an eternal sunset on that distant horizon where you only place dreams the children there, do they know the joy? the day light they must bathe within, is it so splendid? was it ever so splendid? an eternal sunset golden red and blazing on the edges those clouds frame such beauty for in this twilight you can know only fear and ensuing terror the creatures call out to you unleashing laments and tragedy they beg for recognition of their pain they plead forgiveness of their trespasses dare I give it back to them, would they forgive mine? an eternal sunset your eyes take in shining in your watery stare it marks a foreign world, a legend nearly forgotten what dreams it held, was it only yesterday?

the weight of these chains, these shackles perhaps such power was never meant to be touched perhaps eternal life was gift enough yet this land of dusk and decay such magic, such an intoxicating spell, the freedom of choice holds holding fast to your mistaken glory holding fast to your creed you will forever and ever stare into an eternal sunset

Poem 3 recall the garden this dusty image framed, tarnished, chipped, abused holds such an immaculate gift yet these eyes cannot keep a steady gaze the brush strokes were once so pure they’ve cracked with age and use

it is too late for the clock to be turned the hourglass has been struck and now I read about you and me and him and how it all took place before a young fool found time to paint this painting and frame us into the limits of only one imagination

as I touch the dried oil I remember this place deep in my mind and yet such a haze existed around me and it and us that I dare say I felt as if I was living in a dream and that is where you found me lost, alone, wandering and where you named me my tears had formed rivers the peace you brought, so profound yes those endless years of bliss

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why did I long for more was my curiosity any stronger than any other in that divine place

Faith & Spirituality

Not All Who Wander are Lost - J.R.R. Tolkein Bianca Grove

Something that I commonly say to the people I meet while doing interfaith work is that I “grew up interfaith.” On my mother’s side of the family, I am a first generation Filipino American with a very strong Roman Catholic background. On my dad’s side, I am a fourth generation Russian Jew. My parents were married in a wedding ceremony that combined aspects of both Catholic and Jewish marriage cere-

monies and I have always grown up with both faith traditions being a prominent part of my life, especially from a cultural perspective.

Growing up as a child, whenever people asked what religion I practiced, I would always say “I am Jewish and Catholic!” and they would always ask what I meant. My response was usually along the lines of, “I

don’t know, we celebrate the holidays in both.” Eventually, as my parents decided to put me through a Catholic religious education, I began to say “I practice both, but I’m actually Catholic.” By the time I was in high school, I knew that although I identified with a faith tradition, I never found the inner devotion or purpose that makes faith so real in the lives of others.

I was scared that if I didn’t have strong faith, I would seem like a lost cause or so different from the people around me. So I always just said the same thing: “I practice both, but I’m actually Catholic.”

confidence. For a long time I questioned if I should even be involved in interfaith if I don’t even have a rooted faith myself.

The summer after sophomore year I attended an Interfaith conference through Interfaith Youth Core.

On the second day, there was an event at the conference called “speedfaithing” where people gave a 30 minute summarized description about their faith and beliefs and then answered questions afterwards. One talk I went to was held by a girl who considered her-

B

Interfaith had always been second nature to me, so my blessing of an open mind somewhat stopped me from realizing all of the social injustices that can occur when interfaith cooperation does not exist.

That year, I still used my “I practice both, but I consider myself Catholic” phrase, but as I continued to do Interfaith work, the less assured I felt in that statement. I began to develop a sense of the insecurity about myself and what I believed. I knew I was passionate about interfaith, but I felt out of place in a circle where people so openly share their beliefs with

self a “seeker,” who had grown up Catholic but found herself more lost as she got older. She found that the right identity for herself was to have no identity at all. She was open to the idea of spirituality but had simply not found her niche yet.

Her speech resonated with me in ways that made me feel both enlightened and scared at the same time.

The thought of denying everything you’ve been taught to believe is absolutely terrifying - it forces you to face the morals by which you choose to define your life.

It caused me to realize that if I was honest and open with myself and what I believe, everything else would fall into place eventually.

Today, when people ask what faith tradition I believe in, I proudly say that “I was raised in a Jewish and Catholic household, but I identify myself as a spiritually seeking.” I will always consider myself Catholic and Jewish because the beliefs found in each of these faiths has shaped who I am today. Although I am not sure where my journey as a seeker will take me in the future, I hope my own story will enlighten someone the way that a stranger’s story once changed my own life. I look forward to continuing my search with an open mind and an open heart.

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When I got to college, the last place I envisioned myself was doing work with Campus Ministry. My freshman year was spent searching for a group on campus where I felt welcomed and could build relationships that were based on more than a dorm. At the beginning of my sophomore year, I saw the Interfaith Advocates table in front of the IC by complete chance.

Partly due to my childhood in an Interfaith household, I had never realized that this was a field that existed and all of the possibilities it held. Interfaith had always been second nature to me, so my blessing of an open mind somewhat stopped me from realizing all of the social injustices that can occur when interfaith cooperation does not exist. I immediately took interest and became involved, wanting to share the joy that I have experienced through my own upbringing.

[FS]

Faith & Spirituality

A Grown Up Lesson From Childhood Rachel Patterson

When I was five years old, I shared with my friend the concept of girl holidays and boy holidays. It was strange to me that she was unaware on this concept.

Hanukah and Passover were girl holidays, while Christmas and Easter were obviously boy holidays.

It was simple - My mom and I celebrated Hanukah and Passover while my Dad and my brother celebrated Christmas and Easter. Once my parents stopped

laughing at my generalization, my parents wondered how to correct my assumptions.

In reality, my Mom and I are both Jewish and my Dad and my brother are Baptist, which explains the difference in celebration rituals. That hadn’t occurred to me at five. I just knew there were traditions my Dad and my brother had, while there are others that

my Mom and I shared. I was as excited to see a tree in our house without presents under it for me, as I was to light the menorah with my mom for eight nights.

There was no “dual dilemma” as interfaith households are often described to have.

Children have the unique ability to process information as they come across it, whether they are taught the information or not. I was not adhering to gender norms, nor was I concerned with stereotypes that are too often used to describe followers of the Jewish

of my passion for faith and spirituality, which I carry with me today.

The Torah, which is the holy book for Jews, emphasizes interfaith partnerships as a direct result of teaching us to accept others: “You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against your countrymen.

Love your fellow as yourself “(Leviticus 19:17-18).

This is, of course, the Golden Rule. Although all five year olds understand it, it is important for people to understand it when they grow up since it is inevitably

B

Imagine if everyone embraced the diversity in faiths of the world the way a five year old does.

My Mom and Dad decided to raise me Jewish. My Mom always knew she would have a little girl named Rachel. In the Jewish faith, children take the religion of the mother so I would be born Jewish but every family has to make the decision to raise or not to raise their child with religion in his or her life. My Dad, who grew up in a small (segregated) town in South Carolina, had not met anyone Jewish before my mom, and knew little of the tenets of Judaism.

Going to church was a central part of his family life as a child. He said that he could be comfortable raising me with either faith but it was important to him that we made a commitment to study, observe and practice the faith. He wanted me to develop a sense of value, community and spirituality. My mother loved her faith but did not have a firm knowledge of all the components. She took it upon herself to learn more so she could be a role model and teacher, along with the teachers I saw weekly in religious school. These teachers, along with a rabbi who embraced social justice as a basic Jewish Value, formed the foundation

compromised in our very diverse world. My parents embrace diversity in their personal lives as well as in their volunteerism and it was only natural that they would want me to actively embrace and live with these values. The summer after eighth grade, they enrolled me in a one-week social activism program run by a Jewish organization in Chicago. We did not approach tasks as a group of “do-gooders”, looking to step in, change peoples’ lives, and then go back home while patting ourselves on the back for a job well done.

We were taught the beauty of working with people of all races and religions, for the common good. During the entire experience, we were reminded, through readings and prayer, that this collaboration and compassion were intrinsic Jewish values: “In a city where are both Jews and Gentiles, the collectors of alms, collect from both Jews and Gentiles, they feed the poor of both, visit the sick of both...for the sake of peace” (Yerushalmi Talmud, Tractate Demai 4:6).

Imagine if everyone embraced the diversity in faiths of the world the way a five year old does. No one would question a person’s faith to undermine her, but instead only to understand her. No one would teach others about his faith to convert them, but instead only to inspire them. There would be girl holidays and boy holidays all because a brighter more fulfilling peace cannot exist without them both.

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and Christian faiths. I was never taught those things.

I was simply describing something I was witnessing without malice and without indifference. Boy holidays. Girl holidays. There is beauty in that description. It is not always beautiful to see differences as black and white or night and day. There are in fact nuances that I was not aware of as a five year old.

However it is beautiful to accept people for who they are. Innocence is not always ignorance.

[FS]

Nina Berman

Girl Gang Conspiracy Sounds of the Grrrrrl Underground

The Agony and Ecstasy of Saint Girl Gang Conspiracy

1. Jesus Don’t Want Me For A Sunbeam—The Vaselines A riff on an old hymnal sung by Glasgow’s premier raunchy boy-girl group of the 80s. Also Nirvana covered this song but you know, whatever.

2. Help Me Mary—Liz Phair Sung by hometown hero, Liz Phair, Help Me Mary is an invocation to a higher power. For when boys are being real jerks.

3. Heaven Only Knows—The Shangri-Las The princesses of matching hairdos and songs about boys with motorcycles bring their eyes up to the sky, telling the angels up above about their new crushes.

4. I’m Your Angel—Cub Canadian girl gang, Cub, singin’ about the magic that is being in lurve. Try copying the lyrics into yr Lisa Frank notebook with a Jellyroll pen!

5. Devil House—Shonen Knife If this is what the Devil’s house sounds like, I’d sure like to be invited over for dinner!

10. Lord Knows—Dum Dum Girls A real invocation to something higher, this song is all about having made mistakes and letting your life get away from you and hurting people you don’t want to.

At least it’s a really pretty and captivating song otherwise it would have come off as really preachy.

11. Runnin’ Up That Hill (Deal With God)— Kate Bush Listening to any song by Kate Bush, witch grandmother fairy goddess of the countryside and interpretive dancing, is pretty much a spiritual experience in and of itself.

12. Run Devil Run—Jenny Lewis and the Watson Twins Maddeningly lovely ex-child star (Troop Beverly Hills just sayin) and member of Rilo Kiley, Jenny Lewis, took on roots music with her album with the Watson Twins, Rabbit Fur Coat. It’s a banishment of evil, but I’m not so sure I’m convinced that she really wants the devil totally gone.

6. Our Love is Heavenly—Heavenly Sugar sweet and as hand holding-ish as you could want. From an album called Heavenly vs. Satan and in this song, Heavenly certainly wins. Excellent fodder for your next crushworthy mixtape.

8. Neon Angels on the Road to Ruin—The Runaways Teenage dirtbag jailbait punk gals, The Runaways, are the best kind of angel. The kind that can take stereotypical images of oversexualized young girls and then totally inhabit it and force their audience to confront them as neon angels waltzing down a bad path of their own accord.

9. The Rondelles—Angels We Have Heard on High Yep this is that song. Incidentally it has also been covered by Bad Religion, REO Speedwagon, The Carpenters, and Christina Aguilara.

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7. Jesus Saves, I Spend—St. Vincent Annie Clark, aka St Vincent, sings with her lovely voice and then totally shreds on her guitar all over a backing choir that’s singing a kind of Christmas carol.

Also there’s an interlude that sounds like either a cat or a small child, but St Vincent keeps it together.

Career Call Learn About the Workplace

Director of Inte Katie

1) What is your career?

I work at the non-profit Interfaith Youth Core (IFYC). We work nationally to support colleges and universities that are doing work around interfaith cooperation. In my role I work with a lot of campus faculty and staff who are doing the direct work of supporting students on campuses across the country. Prior to starting my job at IFYC I was working on college campuses in student affairs and administrative positions. I believe in the power of higher education to transform lives and the importance of learning from people who are different from you. I got to facilitate learning around diversity and privilege when I worked on campuses and I get to continue to do that in a different way with IFYC. 2) How did you choose your career?

I’m not sure I’d say that I “chose” my career. I find the position at IFYC to be a natural evolution of earlier professional positions and personal/ professional interests. I already mentioned that I was facilitating student learning around difference when I worked on campuses, and that’s something that I contribute to in a different way through my work at IFYC. Prior to working on college campuses (and completing a graduate degree in College Student Personnel), I majored in religion as an undergraduate student at a liberal arts college in Ohio.

I chose to study religion as an undergrad because religion had always been a very positive force in my own life and a structure that allowed me to wrestle with big questions in a productive way. In my family, religion didn’t provide black and white answers, but religion provided a welcoming, hospitable space to deal with the joys and challenges of life. Because I had such a positive experience with religion and I knew that it shaped my own life, I chose to study religion in college because I think religion shapes “people and peoples.”

3) IFYC focuses on bringing young people of faith together, how has your time at IFYC affected your faith journey?

People may be surprised to know that working at IFYC has caused me to identify more staunchly as “Christian.”

The United States operates on such a Christian spectrum that prior to working at IFYC I spent a lot of energy defining myself as a particular kind of Protestant, liberal Christian – I happen to be very, very Lutheran -- and wrestling with my own Christian privilege. Working in a space that is truly interfaith (as opposed to ecumenical or intrafaith) breaks down some of those micro differences and helps me land more squarely in my Christian identity. At the same time, I’ve had to think about how to tell my story clearly to colleagues at IFYC and on campuses, and it’s a story that leans heavily on the fact that my extended family is half Jewish. I believe that working at an interfaith organization encourages me to continue to be active and engaged with my own faith community.

4) From your time at IFYC, what have you come to appreciate about other faith traditions?

IFYC is a rich and vibrant place to work because I’m always learning about my colleagues and how religion intersects with their lives. However, people may be surprised to know that the two biggest things I’ve come to appreciate are about non-religious people and more conservative or evangelical people on my own Christian spectrum.

First, IFYC tries to be very clear that interfaith work must include those who are non-religious, secular, Atheist, and agnostic if we are to be successful (despite the problematic term “interfaith” which we just don’t have a good substitute for yet!). I’ve learned much from my non-religious colleagues and students in our network who

f Campus Engagements, erfaith Youth Core: e Bringman Baxter are committed to engaging with religious people out of a commitment to the civic or community good and are compelled out of their own secular values.

Perhaps more significantly from a faith perspective, I’ve developed a civic and communal appreciation for more conservative or evangelical Christians – those on my own “spectrum” who interpret my own texts and principles differently. These are the people I may have defined myself differently from a few years ago, but who I now try to understand as colleagues and students who can work toward the same civic goals as I am and are compelled out of their own deep commitment to their faith, which actually has a lot of similarities to my faith.

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5) When have you felt that your gender has influenced your work with IFYC? My gender influences me in ways that are traditional to the workplace. I constantly ask myself questions such as: “how many women are in leadership positions in our organization?” “are women’s and men’s voices heard the same in meetings at IFYC?” “are our maternity leave policies and practices as fair as they can be?” I think these are questions and issues that exists in any work place and are issues any feminist must keep at the forefront all the time.

Religion and gender can be a fraught relationship for many, though not for me. I personally come out of a religious tradition that is fully welcoming to women. I’m very proud that our denomination just elected our first woman bishop (we’ve only been around 25 years, so that’s not too bad!), my sister is currently completing the ordination process for our national church body, and I know many women clergy. But I have many colleagues associated with religious traditions for whom interfaith work provides the best opportunity for professional religious work because they are not permitted to lead their own religious communities. So while I have felt many avenues open to me within religion, interfaith can offer unique opportunities and women are emerging as leaders in this new movement across the nation and across the world.

Faith & Spirituality

White American Church and Me Gemma Lee

I. It is an unreal feeling to realize that your white “brothers and sisters in Christ” have been demeaning and oppressing you your whole life. This realization, and my subsequent awakening to the deep seated racism in the American church, is a recent epiphany. In a way, if I knew that racism is un-

addressed by the American public, I should have known that racism would also be unaddressed in the the American church. However, my whole life I had believed in the colorblind manifestos of American Christianity and have swallowed ethnocentric ideologies perpetuated by America’s Christian culture and communities. I had internalized the racist infec-

II. My internalization of racism began very early. One moment I can particularly remember is when I first felt articulate shame regarding my identity. A white male choirmaster took me aside in the first grade and told me to say my savior’s name, “Jesus”.

He was teaching us to sing “Wonderful Grace”, an exciting hymn with a three part harmony. Gee-juss.

“Again.” Gee-juss. “Gee-zuss.”

That damning s that sounded like a z, but I pronounced as a j: My parents said it that way. They added extra syllables of uh’s and ah’s to words and called Evanston “Eh-bahn-ston” and heretically called Jesus, “Gee-juss”. The choirmaster laughed and told me that my parents should have learned English before coming to America. I loved that choirmaster. I learned to despise my parents and their infantile English. I hated that I called Evanston “Eh-bahn-ston” and was found out and I hated that I couldn’t yell “Stop!” without adding an extra uh to the end of the word.

A docile event? It told me that my accent meant I was not speaking English. They only heard uh’s and ah’s and juh’s but no comprehensible words. I grew up quiet and terrified. What is it like to be a Asian-American girl in America speaking Engrish?

Quiet. That’s the rule. Stay quiet.

III. Where do you come from? But where do you really come from? You know what I mean. Always foreign: When I excel in music and academics, I am conveniently called a model minority. But when I, in those rare moments, engage in debate regarding my home country, I am part of a yellow fever than can easily be shipped back to where I come from. Literally, that would mean Chicago, Illinois. But you know what I mean.

IV. Although my experiences in the American church as a young Asian-American woman are specific, they are by no means unique. Though the American church might even believe itself to be a pure Christian community based firmly on the Bible, it

is obvious to me that much of its beliefs and actions are based off of white American culture and history. In its failure to address, or even acknowledge, its racism, it has continuously marginalized people in the name of “evangelism”, “charity”, “missions”.

It has continually dehumanized people through its white savior complex.

Dr. King once said that “the most segregated hour of Christian Americans is 11:00 a.m. on Sunday”. And demographics show that not much has changed.

As a child of Bible teachers and as a second generation Asian-American, my life has been steeped in the American church. I was convinced that because Christians were the “salt and light of the earth”, their racism was different. Their racism was called “being honest”. Racism is often called something else in the American church: it might be called “spiritual guidance” or the “holy spirit”. As an observing Christian, as an imposter to America, I accepted them all, humbly, and reflected on their “critiques” with repentance. Our family should no longer observe the culture of Korea, but should be real Americans. We should observe American ways, eat American food, speak American English. Just as St. Peter ate with the Gentiles. Be American.

American Christians often use Biblical verses to colorblind themselves and eradicate foreignness from others. Biblical text is used to fulfill the agenda of white America and the most racism I have been blatantly approached with, thus far in my life, has been through the American church. I have been told that St. Paul only stayed several years, maximum, in a “mission field”, so isn’t it time my family returned to Korea? Some seminary students have made projects of the Korean immigrants in our community and made “anthropological observations” regarding a “Korean’s capability to be critical”. I have seen xenophobia and racism reminiscent of Carl Linnaeus’ classification of human beings under the pretense of theology and academic observations. My parent’s are often met with incredulity when they introduce themselves as Bible teachers from Korea.

Because the only legitimate Christians are Western since Western culture equals Christianity and vice versa and don’t my parents come from a culture of Confucianism and Buddhism so they are automatically, inherently, less legitimate Christians than their Western counterparts?

V. What should be done? I don’t think it’s my responsibility to both recognize your hypocrisy and solve it for you.

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tions of America and believed in its false promises of equality and solidarity. I believed these were essential to a Christian identity. This internalization, this swallowing of racial poison, is a familiar happening in people of color. I see it in myself, I see it in my brothers, I see it in my hyphen American friends. It has led to internalized oppression, and, even uglier, belief in the lies of racism and White Privilege.

[FS]

Andie Karras

Talk to Andie My 77 Cents with Feminist Favorites

Talkin’ music, spirituality, eco-feminism, squattin,’ and what it was like teachin’ yoga to Madonna (for real!) with Denise Kaufman, Merry Prankster and member of 1960s San Francisco’s first all-female rock band, The Ace of Cups 77: I’m in the woods right now, so it’s a perfect moment to talk about spirituality. Let’s jump right in! What is the one thing women can do to stay centered?

DK: That is a deep question because so many women are in situations where the options for one woman are different than for another. My first impulse is to say “breath easy and savor moments of quiet calm; find times to nourish access to your own soul, to connect and cultivate gratitude.” Some women have lives where they can barely stop just to make ends meet, you know they have three jobs and family to care for. I’m in awe of the courage and determination they embody every single day. I hope they find those moments, whether it’s sitting on the subway or rocking the baby to sleep. Notice moments of nourishing connection and deepen them.

77: Was your mom spiritual?

DK: Yes, she was. She did yoga, was a practicing Jew and much of her life was devoted to being of service to others.

77: Pushing further, how did you discover your spirituality? From what means?

DK: As long as I can remember, I always sensed the presence of spirit, of energy, of mystery.

Connection has always come for me through awareness of body movement, through nature and being in the ocean, through music – especially joining voices with others – and creating community. Playing music is the way I most love to drop into our shared tribal juice and to communicate what matters.

I discovered yoga as a young teen. My mom had books around the house. I was drawn to the mysterious attraction of putting my body into

those shapes and sitting in meditation. When I was in the 6th grade, we moved to a new apartment and I got my own room. I decorated it myself like a Japanese restaurant (laughing). I

didn’t want the pink bedroom. I turned it into a Zen space with brush paintings. I was drawn to a simple aesthetic. I was an odd kid but I had some early body wisdom. My website, www. squateverywhere.com, is all about minimizing the use of furniture and keeping/regaining our flexibility and fluidity by squatting more and sitting on chairs less. The more we live with carpets and low pillows the more mobile we will remain through life!

77: Speaking of simple, I know you’re a vegan.

Can you talk about what that means to your spiritual practice?

DK: I gave up meat, chicken, and fish when I was 18. I haven’t had meat for 50 years, and I’ve been a vegan for the past 7 years. I just didn’t want to participate in the factory commodification of living beings. I wanted less of a footprint in the suffering on the planet. It was my way of pulling out and diminishing my part in the system of animal industries. It was something I could do.

77: I always looked at it as ingesting another being’s fear and anxiety, just the karma surrounding that.

DK: Now if I had my own cow and took care of her, and she has some extra milk, I might make some butter, maybe. But it’s all about relationships. I just feel most people don’t have those

Denise Kaufman

77: I feel like Monsanto owns the earth now.

They own the dirt. I know you live in Hawaii.

How have you seen the ecosystem change?

DK: Kauai (where I live part-time and where we have a small family organic farm) is in a current battle with the biotech companies. There are thousands of acres on Kauai which have been used for years to develop and test GMO crops.

We’re trying to pass a bill to get the companies to disclose the specifics (types and quantities) of their pesticide use – and to limit that use around sensitive areas such as schools, hospitals, and streams. We want a buffer zone of 500 ft. around these areas. They use over 18 tons of restricted use pesticides annually and refuse to give the community accurate information about these chemicals. They are fighting even these modest restraints and disclosures. That’s why if you were to ask me who my favorite hero is currently, it’s Dr. Vandana Shiva. She is an Indian physicist and one of the leading voices for farming sustainably, for saving seeds and our food supply, and for fighting against Monsanto and the other biotechs both in India and all over the world.

77: Which is a perfect segue! Who are your favorite feminists, the women who have made an impact or left a strong impression on your life?

DK: As a young singer/songwriter in the early 60’s, there were a few women who rocked my world. I was looking for more than ethereal folk singers. I was looking for women who were bold, soulful and rootsy. Buffy Sainte-Marie, a Canadian Native-American, wrote powerful and tender songs of love, justice and peace. Judy Henske was a brash woman - gutsy and deep.

Odetta marched with Dr. Martin Luther King and was the voice of the Civil Rights Movement.

She was a shining light of inspiration. Later, I spent some time with Big Mama Willie Mae Thornton and watched Tina Turner almost every night for a month. I’m so grateful that these women shared their gifts (against all odds) and created the space for others of us to step forward.

77: Speaking of super famous, so I’ve been dying to ask, what was Madonna like?

DK: Madonna is a very smart, perceptive, interesting, and soulful woman. I worked with her for 2 years, 3 times a week (unless she was out of town), a couple of hours a day. She was never late. She never cancelled. It was during the time she was recording the album, “Ray of Light.” Sometimes she’d be up all night in the studio and I’d arrive at her home in the morning. She always showed up for her practice. Her home was calm and peaceful. She was a devoted mother to her little daughter, Lola. I really enjoyed working with her.

77: Can we talk about your early career influences?

DK: I was listening to folk music, protest music, blues, R&B and rock as it was evolving. Most of the girls/women on the radio were singing songs other people wrote and they were mostly inane. “My Boyfriend’s Back” and “It’s My Party and I’ll Cry if I Want To.” I used to listen to Rolling Stones songs and try reversing the gender to see how that felt. Seemed as though there were lots of things women weren’t allowed to say. I recorded a song I wrote, “Boy, What’ll You Do Then,” for Wee Records when I was 18 - before The Ace of Cups. It is considered by some collectors to be the first “attitude” song by a woman in Rock n’ Roll. It never got airplay because it was considered too explicit and raw. (Today, it would be completely tame!) The actual 45 record is quite rare - there are only 2 in existence, and one of them sold recently for

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kinds of relationships. I feel we just need to back off. The whole meat/dairy/poultry industry, the suffering of the animals, the pharmaceuticals that go into the food system, the pesticides, the diseases that humans get from eating them and the damage to our earth from all of it – the whole circuit is insidious.

$10,000.

77: Let’s talk more about your voice. Tell me about your work with The Free Speech Movement.

DK: When I was 18, I was arrested at Berkeley (The University of California) at the sit-in at Sproul Hall during the FSM, the Free Speech Movement. I’d been in picket lines and protests since I was 16 as part of the Civil Rights Movement. The University was bowing to forces that wanted to silence voices and stop activism for peace and freedom. With inspiring, articulate leaders such as Mario Savio, the Free Speech Movement was part of an awakening of young people across America. We found that there was power in standing up (and sitting down) together for what mattered. It was a deeply transformative time.

A year later, I was on the bus with Ken Kesey.

LSD had a huge influence on my spiritual journey. I was already interested in consciousness, in meditation, in the creative process. LSD was a direct experience of spirit for me.

77: Do you think LSD should be legalized?

DK: There are many consciousness-shifting psychedelics out there, Ayahuasca, Mescaline, and Peyote. I just think that adults ought to be able to have these psychedelic experiences without it being illegal. It can be so valuable to learn from these medicines. You can shift your consciousness with alcohol, for example, but it’s not very beneficial. Why wouldn’t people want to take a deeper look at what they call reality?

To check out more of Denise Kaufman’s work, go to: http://www.denisekaufman.com/ http://squateverywhere.com/ http://squateverywhere.com/squatsong/ http://www.theaceofcups.com/perform.html http://pranafest.org/ Want more? For anything we’ve discussed in this article, go here: http://www.civilbeat.com/articles/2013/09/09/19855-kauais-passionate-anti-gmo-march-aims-to-sway-local-biotech-vote/ http://www.vandanashiva.org/ http://www.judyhenske.com/ http://www.allmusic.com/artist/big-mamathornton-mn0000762288 http://www.creative-native.com/ http://topics.nytimes.com/top/reference/

timestopics/people/o/odetta/index.html http://www.nytimes.com/2009/02/26/arts/ music/26odetta.html http://www.uic.edu/orgs/cwluherstory/jofreeman/sixtiesprotest/berkeley.htm http://www.policymic.com/articles/48301/ marijuana-legalization-scientists-say-pot-mdma-and-lsd-should-be-legalized-for-further-research http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/09/ gmo-march-kauai_n_3894816.html http://www.amazon.com/Ray-Light-Madonna/dp/B000002NJS/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1380130654&sr=8-1&keywords=madonna+ray+of+light http://www.amazon.com/On-Bus-Legendary-Pranksters-Counterculture/ dp/156025114X/ref=sr_1_sc_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1380130636&sr=8-1-spell&keywords=keny+kesey+on+the+bus http://www.lysergia.com/LamaWorkshop/ AceOfCups/lamaAceOfCups.htm

I think it is safe to say that while the South is hardly Christ-centered, it is most certainly Christ-haunted.”

Faith is what someone knows to be true, whether they believe it or not

There are long periods in the lives of all of us, and of the saints, when the truth as revealed by faith is hideous, emotionally disturbing, downright repulsive.”

All human nature vigorously resists grace because grace changes us and the change is painful “Only if we are secure in our beliefs can we see the comical side of the universe.”

- Flannery O’Connor

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I preach there are all kinds of truth, your truth and somebody else’s. But behind all of them there is only one truth and that is that there’s no truth.

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