The importance of the relationships between boys and their teachers
A reflection by James Gerstman, teacher of Health and PE. I began teaching and coaching boys nearly 20 years ago. When I first started, I was curious as to whether I would lose my connection with them. When would I get to the age when I couldn’t relate? But as the years have gone by, my relationships haven’t seemed to waiver. This is something I’m proud of as I think it’s a crucial part of education. I believe this connection is achieved through a number of processes, but the most important thing, in my opinion, is listening and communication. I have always made an effort to find out a boy’s favourite band, the team they support, the sport or instrument they play or their hobby. When I see them in or out of the classroom, I make sure I follow up on these things. Teaching from Year 7 to Year 12 gives me a great opportunity to constantly build on these discussions and relationships. So by the time the boys are getting to the end of school, I’ve been able to build a strong relationship with them based on something they care about. It’s amazing how many times a boy has
started talking to me about football, music or the weekend and, by the end of the conversation, is sharing with me information about something he needs help with – family, friends, relationships or school. I don’t feel the boys would have shared these kinds of details without the relationships we have built. Naturally, over time, your students learn about you, too. They begin to realise you have more in common with them than they might have thought. They see you have similar interests and passions, find the same things funny, and experience the ups and downs of life just like them. They realise that you understand the difficulties they might be going through because you have been through them yourself. Teenage boys can be complicated and it’s not always easy extracting information from them. They have days they want to chat and others they don’t. It’s never something that should be forced but it’s important they know you’re always going to listen. Building these foundations is an integral part of being a teacher. WINTER 2017
27