The Pulse 12.25 » June 18, 2015

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JUNE 18, 2015 路 CHATTANOOGA'S WEEKLY

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SCIENCE

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Contents

CHATTANOOGA'S WEEKLY ALTERNATIVE

EDITORIAL

Managing Editor Gary Poole Contributing Editor Janis Hashe

June 18, 2015 Volume 12, Issue 25

Music Editor Marc T. Michael Film Editor John DeVore Contributors Rich Bailey • Rob Brezsny Steven W. Disbrow • Matt Jones • Louis Lee Ernie Paik • Rick Pimental-Habib Ward Raymond • Alex Teach Editorial Interns Ashley Coker • Shaun Webster

Features

Cartoonists Max Cannon • Rob Rogers Jen Sorenson • Tom Tomorrow

4 BEGINNINGS: Help end Alzheimer’s... and you don’t even have to run a 5K.

Cover Photo John Whitehead Founded 2003 by Zachary Cooper & Michael Kull

ADVERTISING

Director of Sales Mike Baskin Account Executives Chee Chee Brown • Randy Johnston Angela Lanham • Rick Leavell Chester Sharp • Stacey Tyler

CONTACT

Offices 1305 Carter St. Chattanooga, TN 37402 Phone 423.265.9494 Website chattanoogapulse.com Email info@chattanoogapulse.com BREWER MEDIA GROUP Publisher & President Jim Brewer II THE FINE PRINT: The Pulse is published weekly by Brewer Media and is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on music, the arts, entertainment, culture and local news. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publisher may take more than one copy per weekly issue.

The Pulse may be distributed only by authorized distributors.

Contents Copyright © 2015 by Brewer Media. All rights reserved.

8

One Bag: You Can Take It With You

“If you persevere, you will at some point reach a transcendent moment, in which your (one) bag will be small and light enough to carry without consequence, no longer of any meaningful concern.” — Doug Dyment, onebag.com

12

A Decade of Sideshow Celebrated

A decade. That’s how long it’s been since Lazarus Hellgate and Pinkie, the Princess of Pain, started their sideshow act. It was a humble beginning, just a couple of crazy kids doing weird stuff to amuse, shock and gross out their friends.

20

It Is A Wise Child That Knows His Own Father

At some point, every boy sees his father as a larger-than-life hero, or possibly a villain, or maybe one of those bold, eccentric character actors from the grainy movie that is everyone’s childhood, playing over in one’s mind like a cinema marathon.

RICK’S BACK 6 DAYS A WEEK!

6 JUST A THEORY: Prof. Disbrow blasts off with excitement about what’s going on up there.

14 MUSIC CALENDAR 16 REVIEWS: Africa Express celebrates The Pulse, Spectre reissues some deep disquiet.

19 TECH TALK: Aegle Gear takes aim at a healthcare market ready for disruption.

22 ARTS CALENDAR 25 DIVERSIONS 26 SCREEN: “Jurassic World” is CGIlicious but is the message lost?

28 FREE WILL ASTROLOGY 29 JONESIN’ CROSSWORD 30 on the beat: Officer Alex has firsthand experience of a cycle of cruel failure.

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BEGINNINGS

updates » CHATTANOOGApulse.com facebook/chattanoogapulse EMAIL LOVE LETTERS, ADVICE & TRASH TALK TO INFO@CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

Longest Day Raises Alzheimer’s Awareness Help end Alzheimer’s—and you don’t even have to run a 5K

“

The point of the event lasting all day is to symbolize how caregivers and those that have Alzheimer’s work all day long.”

On any given weekend, you can find at least one “run for (insert cause here)” event in most major cities across the country. From “fun runs” to full-out marathons, sweating for charity has never been hotter. The problem? Not everyone can run. And in a country known for its rampant laziness, plenty more simply don’t want to.

For those of us who forged doctor’s notes to get out of P.E. but still want to feel like contributing members of society, there’s The Longest Day. This day-long fundraiser, hosted by the Alzheimer’s Associa-

tion, takes place every year on June 21. The summer solstice, the longest day of the year, provides participants with about 16 daylight hours for fundraising.

“The point of the event lasting all day is to symbolize how caregivers and those that have Alzheimer’s work all day long. Caregivers may have a job that they go to during the day, but when they get home the work is not done.

Those suffering from Alzheimer’s with never get a break,” said Madison Vinashley coker cent, chapter communications manager with the Alzheimer’s Association.

The Longest Day is like other popular charitable events in that it is team-based and involves hitting up your long-lost relatives for that graduation cash that never materialized all those years ago, but the similarities end there. Instead of participating in a preplanned activity with a hoard of other altruistic-minded citizens, teams may choose to do whatever they want, as long as they do it all day. This lets people cater the event to their unique passions and lifestyles.

This week will mark the fundraiser’s third year in Chattanooga. Past teams have chosen to do everything from walking to caving.

Groups often choose to do something that a loved one affected by Alzheimer’s enjoyed.

Whether your loved one enjoyed fishing or reading, no activity is off limits. If you can do it for 16 hours, it’s fair game.

It isn’t just families and ragtag teams that participate in The Longest Day. Several busi-

News

4 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com

nesses and organizations have jumped on board as well. This year, the Chattanooga Bridge Club will be playing bridge all day, the Tennessee Aquarium will turn their outdoor lights purple (the color of the Alzheimer’s awareness ribbon) and Daylight Donuts will be selling purple donuts for donations.

Since the summer solstice falls on a Sunday this year, Vincent said the Alzheimer’s Association is asking churches to participate in simple ways, like encouraging their congregations to wear purple.

The Alzheimer’s Association has also partnered with local Walgreens stores to sell donation pin-ups at the register through June 28 in recognition of Alzheimer’s and Brain Awareness Month.

The association offers services support for Alzheimer’s patients and caregivers free of charge all year long.

Teams can register for The Longest Day from now until the morning of June 21 at alz. org/thelongestday.

If you have questions about The Longest Day or any of their other services, contact the Alzheimer’s Association at (423) 265-3600.

EdiToon

by Rob Rogers

Your 500 Words of Fame Are Waiting Do you love to write but have the attention span of a fruit fly? Do you get hyped about NaNoWriMo every year just to tap out after page one?

Then have we got the writing contest just for you!

Hunker down and get to typing because The Pulse is hosting our annual short story contest once again. Your inability to finish a novel will be rewarded by our lack of desire to

read one. Come up with a legendary tale and tell it to us straight, in 500 words or less.

The rules are simple: Power up Microsoft Word, wow us in as few words as possible and send it on over to creative@ chattanoogapulse. com with the subject line “Short Story Contest.” Just remember that everyone has access to the paper, including your grandmother,

IN THIS ISSUE

Janis Hashe Feature columnist, arts writer and Contributing Editor Janis Hashe has been both a staff editor and a freelance writer/ editor for more than 25 years.

Her work has appeared in the Los Angeles Times, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, AmericanStyle magazine,

so keep it clean. You only get one shot so make it count—and don’t forget the title.

Send us your masterpiece by Friday, July 10 to be entered into the race for best short story crafter in the universe (or at least in Chattanooga). Our panel of expert judges are waiting and eager to read. Don’t forget to include your name and contact info so we can let you know if you’re a winner. Cool prizes will be forthcoming.

Finalists will be immortalized in the July 23 issue of The Pulse.

— Ashley Coker

Thu, June 18 • 7:15 PM vs. Jacksonville

Georgia Night • Thirsty Thursday

Fri, June 19 • 7:15 PM vs. Jacksonville

Agriculture Night • Fireworks!

Sat, June 20 • 7:15 PM vs. Jacksonville Agriculture Night

Sun, June 21 • 2:15 PM vs. Jacksonville

2015 Team Card Set Giveaway

Jen Sorenson Sunset magazine, and the international magazine Monocle, among many other outlets. She has a master’s degree in theatre arts, is the founder of Shakespeare Chattanooga and a member of the Chattanooga Zen Group.

Her novel “The Ex-Club Tong Pang” was published in December of 2013 (we think it’s a great novel, but we may be just a wee bit biased).

Pick up a copy today, and tell all your friends about it.

Jen Sorensen’s weekly political cartoon appears in alternative newspapers around the country, as well as in magazines and websites such as Ms., The Progressive, and Daily Kos. Jen’s work has won several awards in the past couple years, including the Herblock

Prize, a Robert F. Kennedy Journalism Award, and First Place from the Association of Alternative Newsmedia. In addition to drawing cartoons, Jen recently began editing an online comics section for Fusion, a new network from ABC and Univision. You can see her work every week here in The Pulse as part of our dedication to the cartoon art form. She lives in Austin, Texas and can be found on Twitter at @JenSorensen. chattanoogapulse.com • June 18-24, 2015 • The Pulse • 5

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Space Opera, Summer 2015 Prof. Disbrow blasts off with excitement about what’s going on up there

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Amazingly, just hours before we went to press, Philae woke up and began talking to mission controllers back on Earth!

Hopefully, we’ll be getting more great images (and science) from this amazing mission soon!”

Steven Disbrow is a computer programmer who specializes in e-commerce and mobile systems development. He’s also an entrepreneur, comic-book nerd, writer, improviser, actor, sometime television personality and parent of two human children.

6 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com

One of the best things about writtook Philae about 1 kilometer away ing a science column is that there’s alfrom the comet), the probe came to ways something interesting happenrest in just about the worst place posing, so I’m never at a loss for topics. sible: in the shadow of a large boulIn fact, I’ve usually got the opposite der. The problem with this is that problem: There’s too much happenPhilae is solar powered, so it was only ing! Fortunately, most able to operate for a of the really cool stuff short while before its happening now is hapbatteries went dead. pening in my favorite But—it was able to STEVEN W. DISBROW transmit back all of place: outer space. the data it had colPhilae...Found! lected, including some great photos Remember back in November of of its resting place, before it went last year, when the European Space completely dead.

Agency (ESA) tried to land a probe Of course, Philae is on a comet, on a comet? Well, OK, they did more and that comet is currently inbound than that. They placed a probe (Rotowards the sun. So, there was some setta) in orbit around a comet (convehope that the amount of light that’s niently named 67P/Churyumov-Gerreaching Philae might increase as the asimenko, which I will henceforth comet gets closer to the sun. In the refer to as “the comet”), and then they meantime, the folks operating the tried to land a probe on the comet.

Rosetta probe were trying to locate The orbiting part was (and continPhilae’s final location, so they could ues to be) a big success, but the probe get a better idea as to whether or not landing, not so much. The probe did it would ever get enough sunlight to land on the comet, but unfortunately, wake up again. it did it three times.

Last week, researchers announced When the probe (named Philae) that they might have found Philae! initially touched down on the comet, While sifting through the hundreds its grappling harpoons failed to fire. of images that Rosetta has recentThen, because of the extremely low ly returned, they noticed a shape gravity, it bounced, twice. Why did (made up of about a dozen pixels) the harpoons fail to fire? Because that wasn’t in previous images. The the first landing was too soft and the resolution isn’t great, and the shape initial impact with the surface didn’t might just be something natural on trigger the firing mechanism. the comet that’s been exposed as After bouncing (the first bounce the comet gets closer to the sun and

Just A Theory

Artist rendering of the Philae probe, courtesy ESA.

“melts” away. But, at that point, it was the best guess as to Philae’s location.

And amazingly, just hours before we went to press, Philae woke up and began talking to mission controllers back on Earth! Hopefully, we’ll be getting more great images (and science) from this amazing mission soon!

Bright Lights, Big Mystery Just a few months ago, I told you about the Dawn probe that was about to arrive at the dwarf planet Ceres. (After leaving the asteroid Vesta, which it had visited for the first part of its mission.) Well, Dawn arrived on schedule and has been settling into orbit around Ceres, taking some astounding photos all along the way.

One mystery that Dawn has been focused on are a couple of bright patches at the bottom of a large crater. When these were first noticed by Earth-based telescopes, it looked like a single bright spot. As

Dawn got closer to Ceres, it became clear that it was actually two patches of…something. Now that Dawn is in orbit around Ceres, those two patches have turned out to be at least 10 patches of something that’s very reflective.

At this point, we really don’t know what they are. The current best guess is water ice. But, they could be salt deposits, some sort of volcano or really, really, shiny rocks.

(I’d love for them to be some sort of alien outpost, or maybe the remnants of a civilization, but...that’s not too likely.)

And Don’t Forget…

Just weeks from now (July 14), the New Horizons probe will have its closest encounter with Pluto and its moons. As I write this, new images, the best ever, of Pluto have just been released and new images are coming almost daily. Never-beforeseen details are already popping out of the photos, and there is surely more incredible stuff to come! chattanoogapulse.com • June 18-24, 2015 • The Pulse • 7

COVER STORY

One Bag: You Can Take It With You The art of packing lightly but well makes travel more fun Story by Janis Hashe Photos by Louis Lee

O

“

If you persevere, you will at some point reach a transcendent moment, in which your (one) bag will be small and light enough to carry without consequence, no longer of any meaningful concern. And— from that instant—your travel experiences will be forever changed, with an unfettered freedom that is beyond the comprehension of those who remain bound to their baggage.” — Doug Dyment, onebag.com

K, the prose may be a bit purple in the description above. But if you, like me, have seen far too many people staggering through airports with what seems to be the entire contents of all their closets, you’ll agree with its intent. Packing for a vacation is a discipline—but an easily mastered one. And with most major airlines now “suggesting” even smaller carry-ons (bets, anyone, on how soon that suggestion becomes mandatory?), you’ve got a choice: Learn to pack smarter or pay the baggage fees for checked luggage. Which you then have to lug everywhere.

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With that in mind, we contacted several local retailers to ask what advice they give vacationers bound on two types of destinations, which I’m calling “Tropical” (as in any beach, be it Myrtle, Maui or Mayreau), and “Sophisticate” (as in Europe, Asia or a major U.S. city).

First, let’s talk basic strategies: Your bag.

As Dyment preaches, unless you’re going for a really, really long vacation or you have special occasions that require elaborate outfits, you can travel with one carry-on-size bag. I’ve been a travel writer for 25 years now, and I never travel with more than my favorite bag, plus my purse.

If you do not currently have the ideal carry-on for you, it’s worth the investment. This is a purchase you need to actually make in person, though, to inspect its features.

Clothing color scheme.

The easiest thing, of course, is to stick to basic black and/or neutrals. No one remembers that you’ve worn a simple black pant three days in a row, especially if you’ve changed your shirt/ blouse/accessories. Even if you love prints and bright colors, you can choose items that easily mix and match. The takeaway here: You do not need a completely different outfit (or more) for

each day. Simplify.

Roll, roll, roll your stuff.

It’s pretty amazing how much more stuff you can get into a bag by rolling rather than folding. Knits are great for this, of course, but I’ve found that washed linens, cotton blends and of course denim also emerge unwrinkled. (Tip: If a couple of wrinkles do occur, hang things in the bathroom and let the shower steam unwrinkle them.)

No more than three pairs of shoes. Men, maybe two.

I can hear the shrieks from shoe-aholics, but ladies, take my word for it, the freedom from schlepping Dyment mentions is so much more important than having a shoe for every outfit.

Again, black and neutral colors are your friends.

But please, athletic shoes only if you plan to work out on vacation. This applies to guys as well.

Wear your biggest and heaviest stuff on the plane (car, train, etc.).

Even in summer you may need a lightweight coat or jacket. If, like me, you are a fan of ankle boots for their versatility, wear them. Yes, it’s a pain through airport security but it saves a ton of room in your (one) bag.

“At Frankie & Julian’s, owner Suzanne Bishop is big on sarongs, which can become cover-ups, dresses, evening wraps, scarves, and even bags.”

Healthy Glow Studio

Healthy Glow Studio

The Tropical Pack You’re going to the beach for a week or so.

Maybe the itinerary includes going out to dinner a few times, a little shopping, maybe even taking in a few cultural sights.

Sophia Bridger, owner of Healthy Glow Studio, naturally recommends stopping in for an airbrush tan before you go, rather than baking in the tropical sun. She carries a range of bathing suits— BCBG, Gottex, Eco Swim, among others—which of course you’ll need. Her personal picks for other basics: “The lightweight reversible dresses we carry from Volt….very versatile, and can easily go from day into evening. Definitely our Havianas flip flops or wedges. A fun cover-up. A packable hat by Gottex that shields you from UV rays. And one or two pairs of earrings from Sorrelli, an inexpensive line that looks expensive.” Men, don’t forget the sunscreen, she adds.

At Frankie & Julian’s, owner Suzanne Bishop is big on sarongs, which can become cover-ups, dresses, evening wraps, scarves, and even bags.

She and her staff give demos in-store of how to wrap the multipurpose piece. She loves the Spun

Scarves line for this. “Even for Hawaii, you need one nice dress,” she advises. The Julie Brown wrap dresses suit this need perfectly. “Maxi dresses are also a great choice for the warm weather and can be dressed up or down,” she says.

Betty True, owner of Backstreet Betty’s, has some handy tips: “Take more than one pair of sunglasses in case one is lost. Only pack nude-colored underwear, as that works with everything. Take a strapless bra or bandeau top. A large, packable tote bag is essential. And with jewelry, stick with your go-to basics. Freshwater pearls are perfect, or maybe turquoise, to dress outfits up.”

Note to the male sex: If your vacation is not strictly family time at the beach house, take some nice shorts, some simple, un-logoed T-shirts or polo shirts in basic colors, a lightweight, packable jacket, and one comfortable but well-designed pair of pants. Flip flops are fine for casual time, but a neutral-toned, dressier shoe will come in handy. And don’t forget the packable hat…rollable panamas never go out of style. >> Continued on page 10

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Let’s make a pact to clean up the image of the “typical American” tourist trekking around the great cities of Europe completely unprepared for its cafes, cathedrals and cultural sites. Don’t get me wrong: Being comfortable is absolutely key to enjoying the sometimes arduous demands of touristing. But, it’s true, whether female or male, you can be comfortable and stylish with just a little planning.

Shoes are really the key here.

You just have to have a broken-inbut-not-broken-down pair of classy walking shoes. Ladies, have you tried navigating cobblestones in 4-inch heels? Don’t tell me about the French…most Parisians are sailing through the streets in chic flats or, during the summer, sandals and espadrilles. Suzanne Bishop notes the virtues of the black ballet flat, which can take you almost anywhere.

She also suggests black leggings, a pair of black pants—and possibly your favorite pair of jeans, which won’t require washing and can be dressed up for some destina-

tions. “A white, crisp button-down shirt goes many places,” she says.

Overall, the black/neutral palette serves you very well, as pieces can be mixed and matched. “But if you love color, as many of my customers do, add that with scarves and accessories.” Or, she suggests, take the colors you love, but plan your mixes and matches in advance.

(Re scarves: Remember that some sacred spaces require head coverings.)

Sophia Bridger again emphasizes for summer travel: “lightweight, able to be layered…and don’t forget the hat!”

“Carry on an all-weather jacket,” advises Betty True, mindful of the capricious European summer weather. (The small, collapsible black umbrella is also your good friend.) True also suggests using the plastic packing bags that can be compressed, if you’re going somewhere that might even require sweaters.

All our experts agree: Leave the expensive jewels at home. Decide on gold or silver, pack one small

“It's about style, not age”

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bleudoorboutique.com bag of earrings, necklaces and bracelets. After all, one of the best (and smallest) things to bring home with you are a couple of must-have jewelry pieces.

A cross-body bag in a neutral color will serve almost all purposes, but pack a rollable tote as well—just remember that everything needs zippers for security.

Guys, we are not forgetting you.

Says Bishop, “A comfortable, sophisticated black shoe. A couple of buttondown shirts and/or polos. A packable jacket that will get you into a good restaurant.” Add a nice pair of jeans, a dressier pant, a couple of plain T-shirts, one pair of shorts for the more casual days and of course, the packable hat, and you are literally good to go. Oh, and throw in a tie, unless you want to wear one of the restaurant’s house items. Never good.

“Shoes are really the key here.

You just have to have a brokenin-but-notbrokendown pair of classy walking shoes.”

Here’s a packing maxim for you: When in doubt, take it out. My personal goal is to come back from a trip having worn everything I packed more than once. If I unpack, and realize I never used that item, it likely won’t get packed the next time. Here’s to unencumbered but stylish travel this summer!

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MUSIC SCENE

A Decade of Sideshow Celebrated

If It’s Summer, It Must Be soCro He’s back, he’s loud and he’s at R&B this Friday soCro has managed to generate a bit of a cult following here in his hometown. With influences that include Chattanooga, cheap beer and bikinis, his live shows often reflect his music—loud, unruly and unpredictable. It’s music made for Friday nights. “soCro” itself stands for “Southern Croat,” an ode to his Chattanooga heritage and his Eastern European ancestry. The two styles overtly collide in his music. He takes the bass-heavy, electronic elements of the European club scene and blends them with smooth hip-hop lyrics and hooks. The title of his debut album, Eurotrash Meets Southern Class, leaves little to the imagination but is equally intriguing.

The mix of influences creates

a whirlwind of melodies that are simply unapologetic in both their energy and message. Combine that with his signature chaotic live performances and accented drawl and suddenly the self-proclaimed “Eurotrash” moniker no longer becomes off-putting, but a bandwagon we all want to jump on. soCro will perform at 10 p.m. on Friday, June 19 at Rhythm & Brews.

Fellow artists Superbody, Kindora, and Sun Ghosts round off the lineup. Tickets are $7.

— Shaun Webster soCro 10 p.m.

Rhythm & Brews 221 Market St. rhythm-brews.com

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Sexy, soulful, funky, raunchy dirty pop.

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It's the afterparty for a day of community, featuring the Love, Peace, and Happiness Band.

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The Camp House 149 E. MLK Blvd. thecamphouse.com

Rhythm & blues meets soul with a healthy dash of rock and roll as Travis Bowlin rolls out his brand new album.

9 p.m.

World of Beer 412 Market St. worldofbeer.com

12 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com

Subterranean Cirqus, Lon Eldridge team up at Honest Pint

A

decade. That’s how long it’s been since Lazarus Hellgate and Pinkie, the Princess of Pain, started their sideshow act. It was a humble beginning, just a couple of crazy kids doing weird stuff to amuse, shock and gross out their friends.

Music marc t. michael

“

t’s time for all you people with the ‘Make Chattanooga Weird’ stickers to put your money where your mouth is and head down to the Honest Pint on Thursday, June 25.”

Ten years later, the Subterranean Cirqus has morphed in a full-blown performance troupe, earning some national notoriety and the respect of their industry peers. They’ve made a name for themselves, both for their unique talents and for their ability to create their own market here in Chattanooga where none had been before.

Lazarus sums it up nicely: “When we started, we performed wherever we could, doing shows with bands no one liked in places people didn’t go.

Hardly anyone showed up and when they did, often as not we scared them away. Now? This town shows us a level of love and support I never would have believed possible. Audiences are open enough now to the sideshow concept that acts from all over the country want to come here. To see the guys that inspired me to do this in the first place, heroes really, treat us like peers is the most incredible thing!” The big man trailed off then, weeping tears of joy and humility, which I promised not to include in the article.

The kids have assembled an incredible lineup of talent, not the least of which is Chattanooga’s sharp-dressed musician, Lon Eldridge, who has chosen the River City Rumpus as the proper event for releasing his latest album, “Long Gone.”

Dead Girls Take No Prisoners At JJ’s

Fans of “American Horror Story” may recognize Eric Odditorium, the world’s only break-dancing swordswallower (sword-swallowing break dancer?) Thunder Snow Cone’s Scarlett is bringing the burlesque while partner and suicide girl Smurfasaur SG will be displaying stunning acts of balance and contortion and Mikey Mangorilla will be juggling things that ought not to be juggled.

Tinderbox’s Big Bad Circus Sideshow Road Show from Kentucky will be making their Chattanooga debut with special guest Sanjula Vamana, who was rather famously buzzed off “America’s Got Talent” for a breathtaking deep muscle

piercing. Zanzibar’s lovely Lacy Jo will be dancing and the Chattanooga Fire Cabaret will bring their pyrotechnic performance to the stage as well.

The Subterranean Cirqus will be presenting their own usual band of miscreants and scalawags, including Irish strongman Jason Leroy Lewis and a new performer, the Doll of Shangri-La, a petite beauty whose billing as “fetish artist” doesn’t entirely capture the power of her performance.

Unquestionably, the highlight of the evening will be Pinkie, the Princess of Pain herself, in an attempt to set a new world record for “heaviest weight lifted with both eye sockets (female)”. The current

record stands at 33 pounds, but Pinkie, ever a fan of round numbers, will be attempting to lift no less than 40 pounds.

A new album from one of Chattanooga’s most popular artists, a ten-year anniversary of the revival of the sideshow and the importation of weird and wonderful talent from across the country means one thing: It’s time for all you people with the “Make Chattanooga Weird” stickers to put your money where your mouth is and head down to the Honest Pint on Thursday, June 25.

Show starts at 9 p.m., advance tickets are on sale for $10 via the River City Rumpus Facebook page. Admission is $15 at the door.

This Saturday, June 20, at 10 p.m., Nashville rockers The Dead Deads take the stage once again at JJ’s Bohemia. The Dead Deads are easily one of the most adorable bands that could kick your ass for looking at them the wrong way.

The punky quintet combines raw energy with killer songwriting and a morbidly humorous stage show.

It’s clearly a winning combination, as the popularity of this not-quite-two-year-old band continues to rise exponentially.

Fortunately for local music lovers, the ladies have been making the Scenic City one of their regular stops. It doesn’t hurt that two-fifths of the band hail from Chattanooga (the wonderful Wolf sisters, Leticia and Mandy) but it’s just as likely that appreciative crowds and venues are what keep them coming back.

The Dead Deads will be joined by LA alt/pop group True Violet for what promises to be a night of high-intensity, girl-powered whoop-ass. — MTM

Brand New Home Same Great Music brewer media everywhere. every day.

chattanoogapulse.com • June 18-24, 2015 • The Pulse • 13

LIVE MUSIC JUN/JUL

18 FRI SOCRO 10p 19 MIGHTY SIDESHOW SAT 10p 20 THE CADILLAC SAINTS THU 9p 25 BACKUP PLANET FRI 10p 26 THE VELCRO PYGMIES SAT 10p 27 TORRES THU6 9p 2 ALANNA ROYALE

with CALEB HAWLEY & MATHIEN

THU 9p

EURO DANCE + SOUTHERN HIP HOP

with HOUR LATE

EPIC GUITAR RIFFS & SOULFUL VOCALS

SPREADING THE JAM

CAM AND THE BOYS ARE BACK FLASHLIGHT SHOWS PRESENT:

TICKETS AT FLASHLIGHTSHOWS.COM

7.3 ZOSO: THE ULTIMATE LED ZEPPELIN EXPERIENCE 7.10 & 7.11 FLY BY RADIO (TIMES TWO)

COMING SOON

18

UNKNOWN HINSON SAT 9p with ROGER ALAN WADE

ERICK BAKER

SAT

in concert with GRACIE and JOEY 9p

25

ALL SHOWS 21+ UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED • NON-SMOKING VENUE

221 MARKET STREET

HOT MUSIC • FINE BEER • GREAT FOOD BUY TICKETS ONLINE • RHYTHM-BREWS.COM

MUSIC CALENDAR

CHATTANOOGA

Charlie the Head

thursday6.18 Dana Rogers 5 p.m.

Firebirds Wood Fired Grill 2107 Gunbarrel Rd. chattanooga. firebirdsrestaurants.com Live Bluegrass 6:30 p.m.

Whole Foods Market 301 Manufacturers Rd. wholefoodsmarket.com Feel It Thursday Open Mic 7 p.m.

Mocha Music Lounge 511 Broad St. mochajazz.net Jesse James & Tim Neal 7 p.m.

Mexi Wings VII 5773 Brainerd Rd. (423) 296-1073 Emily Kate Boyd 8 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org Open Mic with Hap Henninger 9 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com Alanna Royale with Caleb Hawley & Mathien 9 p.m.

Rhythm & Brews 221 Market St. rhythm-brews.com Dagger Blue 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia

14 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com

231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com

friday6.19 Jason Thomas and the Mean-Eyed Cats 5 p.m.

Chattanooga Choo Choo 1400 Market St. choochoo.com Smooth Dialects 7 p.m.

Nightfall Concert Series Miller Plaza 850 Market St. nightfallchattanooga.com Tim Lewis 7 p.m.

El Meson 248 Northgate Park elmesonchattanooga.com Novalima

Pulse Pick: Emily Kate Boyd Her blend of Americana rock, folk, blues, and country music channels the cultures and histories of a variety of genres but without ever losing sight of her own unique sound and story.

Emily Kate Boyd Thursday, 8 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org

8 p.m.

Nightfall Concert Series Miller Plaza 850 Market St. nightfallchattanooga.com Turbo Fruits, Behold The Brave, General Dollar 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com Avondale Community Event: Love, Peace, and Happiness Band 9 p.m.

The Camp House 149 E. MLK Blvd. thecamphouse.com Mark Andrew 9 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com soCro

10 p.m.

Rhythm & Brews 221 Market St. rhythm-brews.com

saturday6.20 JFest 8:30 a.m.

Camp Jordan 323 Camp Jordan Pkwy.

(423) 424-1294 Brian Ashley Jones 12:30 p.m.

Chattanooga River Market 1 Broad St. chattanoogarivermarket.com Jason Thomas and the Mean-Eyed Cats 5 p.m.

Chattanooga Choo Choo 1400 Market St. choochoo.com Eddie Pontiac 5:30 p.m.

El Meson 2204 Hamilton Place Blvd. elmesonrestaurant.com Sewanee Summer Music Festival 5:30 p.m.

The University of the South 735 University Ave. sewaneemusicfestival.org Binji Varsossa 6 p.m.

Cancun Mexican Restaurant & Lounge 1809 Broad St. (423) 266-1461 Taraloka Benefit Concert: Fritsl and Teni and Friends 6 p.m.

MUSIC CALENDAR

Megan Jean and the KFB The Meeting House 3912 Dayton Blvd. opentable.com Tim Lewis 7 p.m.

El Meson 248 Northgate Park elmesonchattanooga.com Beppe Gambetta & Tony McManus 8 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org Charlie the Head 8 p.m.

The Camp House 149 E. MLK Blvd. thecamphouse.com Dead Deads, True Violet 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com Travis Bowlin 9 p.m.

World of Beer 412 Market St. worldofbeer.com Mighty Sideshow, Hour Late 10 p.m.

Rhythm & Brews 221 Market St. rhythm-brews.com She She Dance 10 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com

sunday6.21 Rick Rushing & The

Blues Strangers 12:30 p.m.

Chattanooga Market 1829 Carter St. chattanoogamarket.com Open Mic with Jeff Daniels 6 p.m.

Long Haul Saloon 2536 Cummings Hwy. (423) 822-9775 The Oak Ridge Boys 7 p.m.

Tivoli Theater 709 Broad St. chattanoogaonstage.com Party Knüllers: Fred Lonberg-Holm & Stxl Liavik 7:30 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org Catastrofear, Project Armageddon 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com

monday6.22 Children’s Open Mic 6:30 p.m.

The Well 1800 Rossville Blvd. #8 wellonthesouthside.com Joshua Powell & The Great Train Robbery 7 p.m.

The Camp House 149 E. MLK Blvd. thecamphouse.com Monday Nite Big Band 7 p.m.

The Coconut Room 6925 Shallowford Rd. thepalmsathamilton.com Open Mic 7 p.m.

Magoo’s Restaurant 3658 Ringgold Rd. facebook.com/MagoosTN Very Open Mic 8 p.m.

The Well 1800 Rossville Blvd. #8 wellonthesouthside.com Aether Realm, Hatestomp, Wildrun 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com

tuesday6.23 Bill McCallie & In Cahoots 6:30 p.m.

Southern Belle Riverboat 201 Riverfront Pkwy. chattanoogariverboat.com Rick’s Blues Jam 7 p.m.

Folk School of Chattanooga 1200 Mountain Creek Rd. chattanoogafolk.com Open Mic with Mike McDade 8 p.m.

Tremont Tavern 1203 Hixson Pike tremonttavern.com Folk Nebraska, Mythical Motors 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com

901 Carter St. Inside City Cafe (423) 634-9191

Thursday, June 18: 9pm Open Mic with Hap Henninger Friday, June 19: 9pm Mark Andrew Saturday, June 20: 10pm She She Dance Tuesday, June 23: 7pm Server/Hotel Appreciation Night

wednesday6.24 Eddie Pontiac 5:30 p.m.

El Meson 248 Northgate Park elmesonrestaurant.com The Other Guys 6 p.m.

Spring Hill Suites 495 Riverfront Pkwy.

(423) 834-9300 Dan Sheffield 7:30 p.m.

Sugar’s Downtown 507 Broad St. sugarschattanooga.com Wednesday Night Jazz 8 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org Blues Night with Yattie Westfield 8 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com Open Jam 8 p.m.

Raw Bar & Grill 409 Market St. rawbarandgrillchatt.com Megan Jean and the KFB 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com

$5 Pitchers $2 Wells $1.50 Domestics ●

●

Wednesday, June 24: 8pm Blues Night feat. Yattie Westfield Happy Hour: Mon-Fri: 4-7pm $1 10oz drafts, $3 32oz drafts, $2 Wells, $1.50 Domestics, Free Appetizers

citycafemenu.com/the-office

Thursday • June 18 Dagger Blue

Friday • June 19

Turbo Fruits · Behold the Brave General Dollar

Saturday • June 20

Dead Deads · True Violet

Sunday • June 21 Catastrofear Project Armageddon

Monday • June 22

Aether Realm · Hatestomp Wildrun

Tuesday • June 23

HEAVY METAL BINGO (7-9 Free) Folk Nebraska · Mythical Motors

Map these locations on chattanoogapulse.com. Send event list-JJ’s Bohemia JJ’s Bohemia • 231Blvd.

E MLK Blvd.

• 231 E MLK ings at least 10 days in advance to: 423.266.1400 • jjsbohemia.com 423.266.1400 • jjsbohemia.com calendar@chattanoogapulse.com chattanoogapulse.com • June 18-24, 2015 • The Pulse • 15

THE FINEST IN

Record Reviews

erie paik

WINE&SPIRITS Africa Meets West Gorgeously, We will meet or beat any advertised price and special order any wine available in the Chattanooga Market!

Nineties Dark Hip-Hop Revisted

Africa Express celebrates The Pulse, Spectre reissues some deep disquiet

Africa Express Terry Riley’s In C Mali (Transgressive)

“R

WE NOW HAVE LOW GRAVITY BEER!

216 MARKET STREET

423-266-8420

ONE BLOCK FROM THE TN AQUARUM

ules are not as important as results,” said composer Terry Riley in an interview with The Guardian.

The rules to which he is referring are the instructions to his most famous piece, “In C,” from 1964, which uses 53 brief note-patterns and is driven by constant eighth notes playing the note C, often on a piano or marimba, serving as a metronome called “The Pulse,” to the delight of this alt-weekly.

Each performer plays each note-pattern in sequential order but is allowed to repeat it—with breaks according to the performer’s discretion—as often as desired before moving on to the next note-pattern.

No two versions of “In C” are alike, and dozens of recordings of it exist, including string-only versions and even one performed with Chinese instruments.

The version at hand was recorded by the shifting ensem-

16 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com

Spectre Ruff Kutz (PAN)

ble Africa Express in the nation of Mali in 2013 with local performers along with a few western-world artists, including Brian Eno, Damon Albarn (of Blur) and Nick Zinner (of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs).

The Pulse is performed on a kalimba (thumb piano), and a variety of other African instruments are used, including the kora (lute-harp), djembe (hand drum) and balafon (xylophone). Plucked strings meld and mingle with electric guitar lines, malleted percussion and wandering bowed strings, with the proceedings gradually loosen themselves from the constraints of the “In C” score, with gorgeous results.

The players often improvise outside the assigned note-patterns, which may upset compositional purists, who should be reminded that great composers such as Bach, Mozart and Beethoven were also con-

sidered great improvisers. It happens so subtly that it’s hard to notice, but the piece’s trademark feature—The Pulse— even drops out in the middle of the piece. Unexpected, at one point, a performer simply speaks about the time he learned to play the kora.

Terry Riley would agree that there’s plenty of room in the world for artistic rule-breaking, and this interpretation is one of the more satisfying and unique versions so far.

“A

fter digging through my underground vaults, I found some more ill shit to smear in your ear,” says Spectre with a manipulated, pitch-lowered voice at the beginning of his 1998 hip-hop mixtape Ruff Kutz.

That’s not exactly the most welcoming and palatable image, but it’s an ample warning for the often dark, tense yet compelling hip-hop ahead, dubbed by some as the somewhat paradoxical “illbient,” the streetwise twice-removed cousin of ambient music that is simultaneously disquieting and atmospheric. Skiz Fernando is the overachiever behind Spectre (“The Ill Saint”) and the label Wordsound, and he’s also made films and even received praise in the culinary scene for his Sri Lankan cookbook.

Ruff Kutz is finding new life as a reissue on double-vinyl

and as a digital download after its original 1998 run of 100 cassettes. After Spectre’s intro, the mixtape kicks off with “Crooked,” which lends its name to Fernando’s debut feature film; it has a heavy dub vibe with a deep, humid bass line, outdoor noises, echoing, understated drums and delay-treated samples of exotic plucked strings. “Sub Version” (also on the Macro Dub Infection Vol. 2 compilation) is a solemn hip-hop death march with a call-andresponse between whimpering electronics and a swelling cymbal with samples ranging from horror to physics to barking dogs.

It’s not just a one-man show, with Ruff Kutz sporting pieces from other artists including rapper Sensational, Scotty Hard and Professor Shehab and even an appearance from the Jungle Brothers.

Lest we forget, affordable sampling technology in the ’90s really caused a lot of artists to go overboard with the appropriation of film and television dialogue (and numerous other sources), and by the end of the decade, it was no longer novel; in spite of this, Ruff Kutz has held up fairly well over the years, with its keen ability to set a mood, evoking the unease of walking alone at 3 a.m. in an unknown, foggy land.

ALL NEW! ALL FOR YOU!

Raw Dance Club • 409 Market St. • (423) 756-1919 • Mon - Sat: 4:00 pm - 3:00 am facebook.com/raw.chattanooga • Come check us out for FUN!

FREE CONCERT AT THE MACC!

ARTISTI AFFAMATI Thursday, June 18th @ 7 p.m.

Their variety shows of Broadway and operatic hits have been very successful in venues across the Southeast, and they are looking forward to bringing their latest show “A Night of Operetta” to Signal Mountain.

Mountain Arts Community Center • 809 Kentucky Ave, Signal Mountain, TN For more information visit our website at signalmacc.org chattanoogapulse.com • June 18-24, 2015 • The Pulse • 17

Chattanooga’s Greatest Hits brewer media everywhere. every day.

STEP UP.

START A MASTERS OR PHD TODAY. Graduate School

fresh and authentic for over thirty years 5425 Highway 153 N. • Chattanooga, TN www.formosa-restaurant.com • 423.875.6953

Master of City & Regional Planning graduates are making cities better places to live. memphis.edu/planning

12 times voted Best Chinese Restaurant by CityScope

18 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com

Kyle Wagenschutz, MCRP, Class of 2010, City of Memphis Bikeway/Pedestrian Coordinator

Hey Nike, There’s a New Goddess in Town Aegle Gear takes aim at a market ready for disruption

“

He’s approaching garment design like a sports marketer, asking, ‘How can we enhance performance?’ rather than just making the cheapest possible item.”

Rich Bailey is a professional writer, editor and (sometimes) PR consultant. He led a project to create Chattanooga’s first civic web site in 1995 before even owning a modem. Now he covers Chattanooga technology for The Pulse and blogs about it at CircleChattanooga.com. He splits his time between Chattanooga and Brooklyn.

Sports shoes have Nike, the company named for the Greek goddess of victory. The commercial pantheon is about to get a little bigger. Chattanooga transplant George Brown is preparing to launch Aegle Gear— pronounced “ay-gla”—named for the Greek goddess of radiant health.

He’s aiming for that goal of so many startups—using technology to disrupt a market—by tarRICH geting a common product that’s ripe for replacement by a smarter version. Leveraging his experience in sporting goods marketing and healthcare, he’s building a better scrub for nurses and doctors.

There’s a fascinating organic quality to the threads that weave together in Brown’s startup.

From 2004 to 2014, he worked for Meditract, becoming president in 2010. The company helps hospitals manage contract compliance. Headquarters were in New Jersey, but he traveled often to offices in Chattanooga. When the company was recapitalized, new owners gave him the opportunity to work in Chattanooga, which he gladly accepted.

Eventually, he got restless and left the company to find a new startup opportunity.

As a volunteer with Gig Tank, he connected 3-D printed shoe maker Feetz with Uli Becker—former CEO of Reebok and a friend from Brown’s days as a star sales person at Adidas, which owned Reebok.

Becker became a board member of Feetz, a huge coup for a startup.

And here are some of those connecting threads: Becker also has deep Chattanooga ties. He’s from Chattanooga’s sister city, Hamm, Germany, and decades ago was a high school exchange student here with a host family related to the Brock clan. In 2013, he introduced Brown to Krue Brock, who took him to Co.Lab and BAILEY suggested he volunteer with Gig Tank. Brown became an investor in startups Roots Rated and Granola, but he still wanted to build his own company.

How do you combine a 20year career in sports marketing, including a top salesman award at Adidas, and 10 years building a healthcare company? At first, there seemed to be no connection—but then he found it.

“Healthcare workers wear uniformed clothing, and the athletic industry sells uniforms,” he says.

The connections kept coming. From his healthcare career, he knew that controlling hospital-acquired infections is a huge issue that costs hospitals $40 billion a year. In his semi-retirement, he had started wearing Lululemon athletic wear pretty much all the time, because it’s comfortable and the fabric has antimicrobial properties, so you can wear it all day and not stink. Could he build a company around making scrubs from high-tech fabric with antimicrobial properties? Bingo.

“We didn’t only want to

Tech Talk

build scrubs with antimicrobial behavior, we wanted to build healthcare performance apparel that make the nurse feel better, that make the doctor feel better,” he says. “We wanted to build scrubs that have that aura of yoga apparel like Lululemon, but could still be functional as a medical uniform.”

Brown is two weeks away from receiving his second round of prototype garments.

He’s pushing for antimicrobial fiber better than anything available now. He has already achieved 99.9 percent pathogen reduction and is pushing for 99.9 percent reduction after one hour of exposure.

“A lot of antimicrobial is a chemical additive, so it washes out,” he says. “Ours is changing the molecular structure of the yarn, so it’s embedded in the fabric. It is using a certain polymer within the fabric, altering the structure so that this additive is part of the yarn.”

He’s approaching garment design like a sports marketer, asking, “How can we enhance performance?” rather than just making the cheapest possible item.

“We spend millions of dollars developing fabrics for athletes so they can run the 100-yard dash half a second faster, but we spend nothing on people that are saving lives,” he says.

“We’re giving them, essentially, fabric that is no better than bed sheet fabric, and we’re sewing it into garments that are no bet-

ter than pajamas.”

Scrubs available now are cheap, but to make this product work, it has to be significantly more expensive. Rather than ask nurses and doctors to spend more, he plans to sell the product to the hospitals. The pitch: “We’re going to help your Medicare reimbursement rates, reduce hospital-acquired infections, make nurses feel better and give you an advertising vehicle,” a place for logos, another practice from the sports world.

More connections: The Aegle Gear name and core branding were created by Peter Moore, another of Brown’s Adidas connections, who also designed Nike’s Air Jordan launch campaign, known as the most successful shoe launch in history.

“Aegle is the goddess of radiant health and beauty,” Brown says. “Her role is to pay honor to the medical profession.”

An image of the goddess Aegle was created by someone at Co.Lab. “Co.Lab saved my life,” he deadpans. “I was at a point where I was just not really wanting to do anything, floating around not knowing what I wanted to do. I saw these young kids and these ideas, and it got my juices flowing.”

If everything goes well with fabric development, Brown could launch as early as the third quarter of this year.

chattanoogapulse.com • June 18-24, 2015 • The Pulse • 19

ARTS SCENE

It Is A Wise Child That Knows His Own Father

Dog Days With A Downward Dog Artful Yoga returns with The Soul of the Summer Solstice It was Pablo Picasso who said, “Art washes from the soul the dust of everyday life.”

It’s safe to say that most of us have collected our fair share of dust by the end of a long week. Whether your dust is the product of work, family or the rude teller at the bank, the Hunter Museum of American Art and Yoga Landing instructor Hillary Libby have partnered together to bring you an experience sure to exfoliate the soul.

Artful Yoga is a monthly event that includes a walk-through and discussion of specific galleries at the Hunter, followed by a yoga course taught by an area instructor. This month’s installment will take place June 20 at 1:30 p.m. and is appropriately called Artful Yoga: The Soul of the Summer

Solstice.

Art and yoga have long been considered pathways to healing and relaxation; this combination of the two may be just what you need to recuperate from a stressful month and transition smoothly into a new season. A $5 donation is encouraged and will support the Hunter’s educational programs. Participants are required to bring their own mats — Ashley Coker Artful Yoga: The Soul of Summer Solstice 1:30 p.m.

The Hunter Museum of American Art 10 Bluff View (423) 267-0968 huntermuseum.org

Thu6.18

fri6.19

sat6.20

what time is it?

foursome fun

shall we dance?

National Association of Watch & Clock Collectors 71st Convention

“Vanya and Sonia and Masha and Spike”

Dancing with the Chattanooga Stars

For those who like their theater with a a bit of an edge.

8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com

Come cheer on your favorite local celebrities, all for a great cause.

8 p.m.

Tivoli Theatre 709 Broad St. (423) 697-3829 dancingwiththechattanoogastars.com

Tick...tock...tick...tock...

10 a.m.

Chattanooga Convention Center 1150 Carter St. (720) 552-4477 www.nawcc.org

20 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com

Harrison Scott Key's The World’s Largest Man is a grim, tender memoir

A

t some point, every boy sees his father as a larger-than-life hero, or possibly a villain, or maybe one of those bold, eccentric character actors from the grainy movie that is everyone’s childhood, playing over in one’s mind like a cinema marathon. I hope that’s true, because the father stays alive in that way, after he’s passed away, inside the unwritten memoir of each life.

Arts ward raymond

“

The memoir centers on Key’s father, Pop, a fleshand-blood colossus with the strengths of a Hemingway hero and the weaknesses of a Faulkner scoundrel.”

The World’s Largest Man by Harrison Scott Key blows up the memory of the author’s dad like a dynamite load blasting out a stubborn stump. It’s a touching, incendiary, hellaciously hilarious act of literature; a send-up and a tribute and a philosophic credo, “all snorked up together into the nose and shot out like a snot rocket” (the author’s choice of words there).

By the end of the book, Harrison Scott Key has reached middle age, comfortably ensconced in middle-class intelligentsia, with a successful career as a freelance humor writer and a writing professor at Savannah College of Art and Design. He has three mostly angelic daughters (“better than any number of animal heads”) and a long-suffering wife—a requisite for any writer, if book dedications are to be believed. That’s the second half of this ambitious memoir, positioning the author’s NPR-listening, suburb-dwelling adulthood against the backdrop set by his gun-loving, asswhupping, louder-than-fiction father.

In the book’s first half, other characters in Key’s childhood include his mother, older brother Bird, and a variety of scurrilous male acquaintances all renamed “Tom” or “Thomas” or

“Tommy” to shield the author from their armed retaliation. However, the memoir centers on Key’s father, Pop, a flesh-and-blood colossus with the strengths of a Hemingway hero and the weaknesses of a Faulkner scoundrel. His father has “the emotional tenderness of a Soviet farm tractor.”

He is the “Incredible Hulk with a heart condition and a comb-over.”

Pop’s greatest joy in life is dragging his two sons out of a warm bed to kill and butcher innocent woodland creatures, which horrifies young Harrison, who prefers acting and literature and grocery shopping with his mother.

Pop beats his children violently with a belt for petty infractions, and the household is fraught with tension.

The author vividly paints his father as a boiling volcano, a Neanderthal, and a virulent racist, and yet…

And yet, Pop conceives the idea to assemble and coach a baseball team of black Caribbean orphans, although he won’t allow his son to befriend an African-American playmate in racially segregated Mississippi. Writes Key: “He had his issues with black skin, but was drawn inexorably toward boys with no fathers, black and white, a gravitational pull stronger than history.” Both halves of the book—childhood and adulthood—resonate with such taut sentences that expand in the reader’s mind, giving depth to the broadly comic (and sharply pathetic) episodes in Key’s remembrance. For example: “Sports taught us a lot as young southern men, mostly how to hurt each other in exchange for the praise of our fathers.” “[Pop’s] greatest lesson was the

one he never said out loud, the thing a father should do, which is this: Be there. Always be there. And never stop being there, until you can’t be there anymore.”

Each of the 22 chapters delineates a finite aspect of memory: Southern storytelling, “doe day” in hunting season, gruesome encounters with dying animals, Pop getting even with his boss at work. The chapters flow chronologically from Key’s regrettable boyhood move from Memphis to rural Mississippi, through a midpoint episode where his father beats him with a belt for the final time at age 17, to the inevitable death of his father in the final episode.

By dividing the book between his childhood and adulthood, Key explores the parallel path that a son walks beside his father. It’s an ambitious task, to make us laugh and cringe, to stare intently and turn away in distaste—and it works powerfully well. The writer’s palette is rich, eclectic, and more than a little absurd: Greek mythology, children’s Claymation movies, gun and hunting lore, logo characters for children’s enema products, Old Testament retributive justice, Bee Gees’ songs. In my favorite chapter, “The Horror, the Horror,” Key’s wife becomes Kurtz in Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness as she tries to potty train their first daughter. It may be more memorably grim than the original. This memoir is altogether memorable, grim, original, and worth the read.

Harrison Scott Key gives a reading open to the public at Gailor Hall Auditorium, Sewanee School of Letters, at 4:30 p.m. Central time on Wednesday, June 24. chattanoogapulse.com • June 18-24, 2015 • The Pulse • 21

EVERY Friday, Saturday & Sunday until Labor Day!

Music F o od

Fun

For the Whole Family !

Taylor Kress

Tarryn Aimée Smith

Fridays 11am - 7pm

Saturdays 11am - 7pm

HIGHBEAMS Sundays 11am - 7pm

Old Time Travelers

Fridays, Saturdays & Sundays 9am - 3pm

Join us for old time,

blue grass, and country music with a Seven States view during Summer Music Weekends. Come enjoy a summer day at Rock City Gardens, dine at Café 7, and catch a Rock City Raptor Show!

Community Partner:

Brews. Views. Chews. 11a-4p Daily

For more info call: 706.820.2531

ARTS CALENDAR

Presents

thursday6.18 National Association of Watch & Clock Collectors 71st Convention 10 a.m.

Chattanooga Convention Center 1150 Carter St. (720) 552-4477 www.nawcc.org Homeschool Science Club 1 p.m.

Creative Discovery Museum 321 Chestnut St. (423) 756-2738 cdmfum.org “The Stranger" 2, 7 p.m.

Heritage House Arts & Civic Center 1428 Jenkins Rd. (423) 855-9474 chattanooga.gov Ooltewah Farmers Market 3 p.m.

Ooltewah’s Nursery & Landscape Co. 5829 Main St. (423) 238-9775 ooltewahnursery.com Goat Milking Demonstration & Celebration 3:30 p.m.

Ooltewah’s Nursery & Landscape Co. 5829 Main St. (423) 238-9775 ooltewahnursery.com Guided Kayak Sunset Tour: “Taming the Tennessee” 5:30 p.m.

Outdoor Chattanooga/

22 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com RCsummerMusicQR.375x9.8.indd 1

6/15/15 11:12 AM

“Vanya and Sonia and Masha and Spike” Chattanooga History Center Chickamauga Dam (423) 643-6888 outdoorchattanooga.com Summer Video Class 5:30 p.m.

Association for Visual Arts 30 Frazier Ave. (423) 265-4282 www.avarts.org Art & Issues: “Displaying Ourselves” 6 p.m.

The Hunter Museum wof American Art 10 Bluff View (423) 267-0968 huntermuseum.org South Africa: A Wine Event at Back Inn Café 6:30 p.m.

Back Inn Café 411 2nd St.

Pulse Pick: goat milking Bill and Becky Ensinger of Dixie Soaps are bringing their Alpine goats to Brainerd Farmers’ Market for a meet-and-greet and a milking demonstration.

Brainerd Farmers Market Saturday, 10 a.m.

Grace Episcopal Church 20 Belvoir Ave. (423) 243-3250

(423) 265-5033 bluffviewartdistrict.com “Mystery of the Nightmare Office Party” 7 p.m.

Vaudeville Café 200 Market St. (423) 266-6202 funnydinner.com PSC Presents Nye Simmons 7 p.m.

St. John United Methodist Church 3921 Murray Hills Rd. (423) 894-5210 chattanoogaphoto.org “Vanya and Sonia and Masha and Spike” 7 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com

Chattanooga Lookouts vs. Jacksonville Suns 7:15 p.m.

AT&T Field 201 Power Alley (423) 267-2208 lookouts.com

friday6.19 National Association of Watch & Clock Collectors 71st Convention 9 a.m.

Chattanooga Convention Center 1150 Carter St. (720) 552-4477 www.nawcc.org Jam & Bread 6 p.m.

Creative Discovery Museum 321 Chestnut St. (423) 756-2738 cdmfum.org Moccasin Bend Brewery Tour & Tasting 6 p.m.

Moccasin Bend Brewing Company 4015 Tennessee Ave. (423) 821-6395 bendbrewingbeer.com “Mystery of Flight 138” 7 p.m.

Vaudeville Café 200 Market St. (423) 266-6202 funnydinner.com Chattanooga Lookouts vs. Jacksonville Suns 7:15 p.m.

AT&T Field

ARTS CALENDAR 201 Power Alley (423) 267-2208 lookouts.com “Big Fish” 7:30 p.m.

The Colonnade Center 264 Catoosa Cir., Ringgold (706) 935-9000 colonnadecenter.org Comedian James Gregory 7:30 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com “Vanya and Sonia and Masha and Spike” 8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com

saturday6.20 National Association of Watch & Clock Collectors 71st Convention 9 a.m.

Chattanooga Convention Center 1150 Carter St. (720) 552-4477 www.nawcc.org Chickamauga Battlefield Bicycle Tour 9:30 a.m.

Outdoor Chattanooga Chickamauga Battlefield Visitor Center (423) 643-6888 outdoorchattanooga.com Goat Milking Demo

Brainerd Farmers Market 10 a.m.

Grace Episcopal Church 20 Belvoir Ave. (423) 243-3250 saygrace.net Day Course in Mindful Meditation 10 a.m.

Center for Mindful Living 1212 McCallie Ave. (423) 486-1279 centerformindfulliving. wildapricot.org Paddle Sports Clinics & Demo Day 10 a.m.

Outdoor Chattanooga 200 River St. in Coolidge Park (423) 643-6888 outdoorchattanooga.com Chattanooga River Market 10 a.m.

Tennessee Aquarium 1 Broad St. (423) 267-3474 chattanoogarivermarket.com Painting Demonstration with Ruth Koh Noon River Gallery 400 E. Second St. (423) 265-5033 river-gallery.com Vintage Base Ball Match Noon 6th Cavalry Museum 6 Barnhardt Cir., Fort Oglethorpe (706) 861-2860 6thcalvarymuseum.org “Big Fish” 1. 7:30 p.m.

The Colonnade Center

264 Catoosa Cir., Ringgold (706) 935-9000 colonnadecenter.org Moccasin Bend Brewery Tour & Tasting 1 p.m.

Moccasin Bend Brewing Company 4015 Tennessee Ave. (423) 821-6395 bendbrewingbeer.com Artful Yoga: The Soul of Summer Solstice 1:30 p.m.

The Hunter Museum of American Art 10 Bluff View (423) 267-0968 huntermuseum.org Makeanooga Teen Writing Group: Special Guest Author Jana Oliver 2:30 p.m.

Northgate Public Library 278 Northgate Mall Dr. (423) 870-0635 chattlibrary.org “Mystery of the Facebook Fugitive” 5:30 p.m.

Vaudeville Café 200 Market St. (423) 266-6202 funnydinner.com James Gregory 7 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com “Mystery of the Redneck Italian Wedding” 7 p.m.

Vaudeville Café

200 Market St. (423) 266-6202 Chattanooga Lookouts vs. Jacksonville Suns 7:15 p.m.

AT&T Field 201 Power Alley (423) 267-2208 lookouts.com Dancing with the Chattanooga Stars 8 p.m.

Tivoli Theatre 709 Broad St. (423) 697-3829 dancingwiththechattanoogastars.com “Vanya and Sonia and Masha and Spike” 8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com

“Top 10 Extreme Thrill” - Groupaway Travel Magazine

OPEN EVERY DAY! 9a-6p

sunday6.21 Chattanooga Market Father’s Day Bacon, Blues & Brews 11 a.m.

First Tennessee Pavilion 1826 Reggie White Blvd.

(423) 266-4041 chattanoogamarket.com Wildflower Walk at Lula Lake 1 p.m.

Lula Lake Land Trust 29 Mt. Olive Rd. (423) 267-3474 www.tnaqua.org Energy Clearing Workshop 1:15 p.m.

Center for Mindful Living

RubyFallsZip.com 423.821.2544

chattanoogapulse.com • June 18-24, 2015 • The Pulse • 23 RFZIPStreamDailySBTqr.375x9.8.indd 1

6/15/15 11:02 AM

ARTS CALENDAR

Painting Demonstration with Ruth Koh

1212 McCallie Ave. (423) 486-1279 centerformindfulliving. wildapricot.org Moccasin Bend Brewery Tour & Tasting 2 p.m.

Moccasin Bend Brewing Company 4015 Tennessee Ave. (423) 821-6395 bendbrewingbeer.com Chattanooga Lookouts vs. Jacksonville Suns 2:15 p.m.

AT&T Field 201 Power Alley (423) 267-2208 lookouts.com “Vanya and Sonia and Masha and Spike” 2:30 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com

monday6.22 Audition for the New Dance Ensemble for the MACC 4:30 p.m.

Mountain Arts Community Center 809 Kentucky Ave., Signal Mountain (423) 886-1959 signalmacc.org One Step at a Time 6 p.m.

Shepherd Community

24 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com

Center 2124 Shepherd Rd. (423) 999-7958 Monday Night Vintage Swing Dance 7 p.m.

ClearSpring Yoga 17 North Market St. (423) 266-3539 clearspringyoga.com Native Plants for Native Fauna: Sierra Club Meeting 7 p.m. green|spaces 63 E. Main St. (423) 903-9394 greenspaceschattanooga.org

tuesday6.23 Food Preservation Class 10 a.m.

UTC Extension (423) 855-6113 extension.tennessee.edu Renaissance: A Print and Book Arts Exhibit 2 p.m.

Downtown Library 1001 Broad St. (423) 757-5310 chattlibrary.org Food Preservation Class 6 p.m.

UTC Extension (423) 855-6113 extension.tennessee.edu

wed6.24 Hunter 101

9:30 a.m.

The Hunter Museum of Art 10 Bluff View (423) 267-0968 huntermuseum.org Chattanooga Market 3 p.m.

First Tennessee Pavilion 1826 Reggie White Blvd.

(423) 266-4041 chattanoogamarket.com Main Street Farmers Market 4 p.m.

325 E. Main St. mainstfarmersmarket.com 8-Week Summer Dance Session 4:30 p.m.

Mountain Arts Community Center 809 Kentucky Ave. (423) 886-1959 signalmacc.org Open Chattanooga Hack Night 5:30 p.m.

Downtown Public Library 1001 Broad St. (423) 757-5310 chattlibrary.org Wednesday Night Chess Club 6 p.m.

Downtown Public Library 1001 Broad St. (423) 757-5310 chattlibrary.org Map these locations on chattanoogapulse.com. Send event listings at least 10 days in advance to: calendar@ chattanoogapulse.com

Diversions

Consider This with Dr. Rick

by Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D. “Live life as if everything is rigged in your favor.” — Rumi Because it is!

Think about how you’ve met your favorite people—partners, friends, coworkers. There is likely a winding, unpredictable path that led you to them, and they to you. Your life unfolded, as did theirs.

Now think about a favorite experience: perhaps a concert, travel adventure, dinner, date. How did it come about? If you planned it, what was the step before? And the step before that? And before that?

The Universe (use whatever term you’d like; Higher Power, the God of Your Understanding, Spirit) wants only a healthy, joyous life for you. It’s eternally ready to help you actualize your dreams. It’s we who get in the way, every time we do not hear, or we try to control the uncontrollable, or force that square peg into the round hole.

In your next meditation, prayer or pondering, try to see yourself as part of the flow of all good things. Because you are. chattanoogapulse.com • June 18-24, 2015 • The Pulse • 25

SCREEN SCENE

Bigger, Louder, Deadlier Dinos “Jurassic World” is CGI-licious but is the message lost amidst the chaos?

Orson Welles Seeks A Stranger Heritage House Classic Film Series screens a classic The Heritage House Arts & Civic Center continues their summer film series with an often-overlooked classic from one of the most innovative directors of the 20th century: Orson Welles.

Welles directed and starred alongside Edward G. Robinson and Loretta Young in 1946’s “The Stranger,” which tells the tale of an investigator with the War Crimes Commission seeking Franz Kindler, mastermind of the Holocaust, who has effectively erased his identity.

Mr. Wilson (Robinson) releases Kindler’s former comrade and fol-

✴✴✴✴

lows him to Harper, Connecticut, where he is killed before he can identify Kindler.

His only clue is Kindler’s fascination with antique clocks; but, though Kindler seems secure in his new identity, he feels his past closing in.

Admission is free and they even throw in some delicious popcorn.

“The Stranger" 2, 7 p.m.

Heritage House Arts & Civic Center 1428 Jenkins Rd. (423) 855-9474 chattanooga.gov

NEW IN THEATERS

Inside Out After young Riley is uprooted from her Midwest life and moved to San Francisco, her emotions conflict on how best to navigate a new city, house and school.

Directors: Pete Docter & Ronaldo Del Carmen Stars: Amy Poehler, Lewis Black

✴✴✴✴

Dope Life changes for Malcolm, a geek who's surviving life in a tough neighborhood, after a chance invitation to an underground party leads him and his friends into a Los Angeles adventure.

Director: Rick Famuyiwa Stars: Shameik Moore, Tony Revolori

26 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com

M

ary Shelley created a monster with her novel “Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus.” This is the second time I’ve referenced her gothic novel just this year, as the tale of man creating the instrument of his downfall is a story cycle told over and over again across genres, to the point of weariness.

Screen john devore

“

This is exactly the ‘Jurassic Park’ sequel most fans wanted— the audience gets to laugh as unnamed tourists are ripped apart by various dinosaurs with names they can’t pronounce.”

Shelley was not the first to examine these themes, but her novel has inspired countless recreations and reinterpretations. Michael Crichton’s “Jurassic Park” is a recent example (at least, it’s recent to me, as it doesn’t seem like 25 years ago when my 8-year-old self devoured the book). Crichton took the new technology of genetic engineering and showed us wonder and fear, renewing interest in one of the most fascinating scientific fields there is. It was a watershed moment for science fiction and modern literature.

But it was the film that was the real turning point. Steven Spielberg’s “Jurassic Park” recreated Hollywood.

Practical filmmakers, makeup artists, puppeteers, and stop-motion animators held their breath as they seemed to become as outdated as Alan Grant, the paleontologist in the original film.

Over the next two decades, filmmaking became more and more reliant on CGI, actors were forced to interact with tennis balls, and green screens replaced real sets. Much like Shelley, Spielberg created his own monster, changing the industry so profoundly that any reliance on real-world filmmaking techniques is looked at as an anomaly—see the reaction to the practical effects of “Mad Max: Fury Road” to understand how far we’ve come.

This year celebrates the advent of CGI usage on a massive scale with “Jurassic World,” an acceptable entry into

the “Jurassic Park” canon following two lackluster sequels. It is not, by any means, on par with the legendary original film. However, it is stupidly thrilling and fun and what we’ve come to expect from a June blockbuster.

“Jurassic World” refers to the dinosaur theme park that is now situated on top of the failed attraction from the first film. Dino-tourism, it seems, has become a success. So much so that dinosaurs have lost their luster. The park is Disney-fied and safe, staffed by overweight security guards and bored teenagers. The company has created a beautiful, expensive tourist destination where no one gets eaten and the animals are contained. Even the deadly velociraptors are now trained, taking orders for frozen mice, tamed like the dolphins at Sea World.

As a result of sanitizing the menace, profits are down. The danger of dinosaurs has always been a driving factor behind ticket sales. The park is now owned by a billionaire not connected to John Hammond, the late creator of the park, and to increase sales the company has begun to create new hybrid dinosaurs, upping the wow factor with more teeth and louder roars.

Of course, with this being a “Jurassic Park” movie, the general safety of the crowds is predicated on the illusory control maintained by administrative buffoons who value profit over good sense. When the animals are disrespected, their control breaks down and chaos reigns.

In other words, this is exactly the “Jurassic Park” sequel most fans wanted—the audience gets to laugh as unnamed tourists are ripped apart by various dinosaurs with names they can’t pronounce. There is no character development to speak of. The audience is never invested in the heroes or the villains. The people are just talking snacks for the real stars of the film. Gone is any sense of philosophical musing; we don’t get explanations of chaos theory from a character like Ian Malcolm, or ethical debates about Chilean sea bass around a table of professionals. Instead, there are ridiculous subplots involving military interest in using raptors as weapons so the filmmakers can justify a scene with Chris Pratt riding a motorcycle alongside dinosaurs in the jungle. So long as you don’t think about what’s happening on screen, the film is a perfectly fine sequel.

More interesting to me are the parallels between what is happening on screen and the advent of this kind of filmmaking. Audiences have demanded more and more CGI, looking for louder explosions, more destruction, amplified action. The film is making the case that we will eventually reap what we sow. When we want more teeth, we can’t complain that those teeth eventually eat away at everything we hold dear. We have sacrificed nuance for excess—and “Jurassic World” is just simply the culmination of our collective need for more. chattanoogapulse.com • June 18-24, 2015 • The Pulse • 27

Free Will Astrology

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A T T O R N E Y S

A T

L A W

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Before E. Annie Proulx became a Pulitzer Prize-winning novelist, she wrote a series of how-to books, including a dairy foods cookbook and an instructional text on making your own hard cider. But the manual of hers that I especially want to call your attention to right now is Plan and Make Your Own Fences & Gates, Walkways, Walls & Drives. It might be inspirational for you to read it. You’re in a phase when it makes perfect sense to create new paths for yourself to travel on. This will allow you to forgo at least some of the paths that others have built and that can’t actually take you where you need to go.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): I’m getting itchy to see you blow your own cover. I would love you to come all the way out of your hiding place, even if just for a while, and see what happens if you make full disclosures and brave displays. My hope is that you will close the gap between the real you and the images that people have of you. Does that sound interesting? Or have you become so fond of being a big riddle that you can’t imagine any other way to be? Maybe I can tempt you to be more self-revelatory if I add this: Taking your disguises off even briefly will enable you to discover intriguing secrets about yourself. And then once you put your disguises back on, you will seem more mysterious than ever.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): A new cycle will begin for you after your birthday. Between now and then you will be wrapping up the current cycle. I invite you to do so with a flourish. Don’t just wait around passively for the themes of the last 11 months to fade away or go to sleep. Instead, set an intention to bring them to a climactic close. Schedule a splashy graduation or a grand finale. Plan a cathartic party or a celebratory rite of passage. Take a playful leap of faith or try that magic trick you’ve been saving for the perfect moment. Or all of the above!

Davis & Hoss, PC Davis & Hoss, PC

A T T O R N E Y S

A T

L A W

A T T O R N E Y S

A T

L A W

CHATTANOOGA'S WEEKLY ALTERNATIVE

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “I’m tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin deep,” said author Jean Kerr.

“That’s deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas?”

In accordance with the current

28 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com

rob brezsny

astrological omens, Virgo, you should feel free to play around with that impish idea. Just for now, appreciate and enjoy the surfaces of things. Make decisions based on first impressions and instant analyses. Give your attention and energy to what looks appealing to you, and don’t think too hard about stuff that presents a boring appearance.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Now is a favorable time to wish upon a star. In other words, you can enhance the likelihood that your wish will come true if you choose this phase of your cycle to enlist the assistance of a higher power. It’s your duty to make sure, however, that you wish upon the right star. Pick a higher power that can truly help you with your wish, not necessarily one that has worked for other people’s wishes. Here’s another crucial detail: Be precise in formulating your wish. No foggy thinking or sloppy language allowed!

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): If you are fully committed to being both honest and kind, you will have more power to heal other people than you’ve had in a long time. You will have a resemblance to a magic potion or a wonder drug. Here’s a caveat, however: The therapeutic influence you have to offer might be scary to those who aren’t ready to be cured. The solutions you propose could be disruptive to anyone who is addicted to his or her problems. That’s why I advise you to be discerning about how you share yourself. P.S. The medicine you are generating is not too potent for your own use. It’s exactly what you need to transform limitation into liberation.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Each of us has at least one

pesky ghost or nagging demon that occupies a dark corner of our psyches. It may have been there for years, or we might have picked it up more recently during a phase of temporary insanity. In any case, most of us can benefit from conducting a periodic banishing ritual. Now would be prime time for you to do just that. Ready? With your imagination, draw a clockwise circle of your favorite-colored light on the floor or ground. Next, identify an image that makes you feel happy and safe, and visualize four versions of it at the four cardinal points, hovering three feet above your circle. Then say this: “I dissolve any hex and banish any pest that has been draining my energy.

I purge any wasteful emotions, unsound ideas, and trivial desires that I may have grown attached to.” To put the seal on your magic, laugh for two minutes.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): By my estimation, 97 percent of the population is chronically starving for the pleasure of being listened to with deep empathy and focused intelligence. Very few of us enjoy the prolonged and undivided attention of a receptive ally on a regular basis. It’s rare to be in the presence of a person whose sole agenda is to be innocently curious about you. Your assignment, Capricorn, is to go on a quest to remedy this shortfall. Figure out how you can get the skillful listening you’re missing. (P.S. One way to prime the magic is to offer yourself up as a skillful listener to others.)

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): At this year’s Grammy Awards ceremony, British singer Sam Smith won in four categories. His tune “Stay with Me” was named Song of the Year. In one of his acceptance speeches, Smith expressed appreciation for the difficult muse who inspired the song. “I want to thank the man who this record is about, who I fell in love with last year,” he said. “Thank you so much for breaking my heart, because you got me four Grammys.” I invite you to come up with a comparable expression of gratitude, Aquarius.

What experience that seemed like tough luck at the time has actually turned out to be a blessing?

Now would be a perfect time to acknowledge and relish and make

full use of the unexpected grace.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): The Bay of Fundy is a branch of the Atlantic Ocean between the Canadian provinces of Nova Scotia and New Brunswick.

It’s renowned for its tidal range.

When high tide comes, the water may be as much as 53 feet higher than what it is at low tide. The shift back and forth happens twice a day. I’m wondering if in the coming weeks your emotional ebb and flow will have a similar variability. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you could experience both very high highs and very deep depths. Please note that when I say “depths,” I don’t mean sadness or despair. Rather, I’m talking about a profound ability to feel your way into the heart of things.

ARIES

(March 21-April 19): Would you like to stop pushing and struggling for a while? Is there a clenched attitude you would love to let go of? Do you wish you could take a break from having to give so much and try so hard and be so strong?

Then do it! Now would be a good time to take a sabbatical from any situation that feels too demanding or frustrating. You wouldn’t incur the wrath of the gods or the twists of karma if you sneaked away to indulge in some recreational frivolity. For the foreseeable future, “relax” and “surrender” are your words of power.

TAURUS

(April 20-May 20): Theologian Karl Barth speculated that when the angels get together to praise and honor God with music, they perform the compositions of Bach. But when they are playing for each other, they are more likely to choose Mozart. I guess that’s because Mozart’s stuff is loose and free and inventive compared to Bach, who’s formal and sober and systematic.

Mozart is more for parties, while Bach is for serious occasions. I’m seeing the coming days as a time when you, like the angels, should be especially willing to express yourself in very different ways, depending on the audience.

Homework: Test this hypothesis: By giving up a useless “valuable” you don’t really need, you’ll ensure the arrival of a real valuable that you do need.

Jonesin’ Crossword

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“F Plus Plus”—that’s a lot of Fs. ACROSS 1 Bread spreads 6 Squeal (on) 9 Office-inappropriate, in web shorthand 13 Get ready for a bodybuilding competition 14 “Here ___ Again” (1987 #1 hit) 15 Moved a rowboat 17 With 20-Across, 1840s slogan in the Oregon border dispute 19 Address a crowd 20 See 17-Across 22 Business priority 25 Abbr. on a lotion bottle 26 Parisian pronoun 27 Topmost point 28 “Dig in!”

31 Game pieces 33 Circulation improver 34 Doughnut shape 36 “Star Wars” home of Jar Jar Binks 40 Sold extremely

quickly 43 College applicant’s creation 44 Carell of “The Office” 45 “Go on, scat!”

46 Abbr. on old Eurasian maps 48 Real ending in London?

49 Signal “Hello!”

50 2012 Facebook event 53 Ball bearer 55 Declutter 57 Sports figure in a 2015 sports scandal 61 “Help!” actor Ringo 62 Repetitive Beach Boys hit 66 “Golly!”

67 Cyan finish?

68 As a result of 69 Affirmative votes 70 Setting for Christmas in NYC 71 Air beyond the clouds DOWN 1 “Pow!” reaction

2 2018 Super Bowl number 3 “The Santaland Diaries” occupation 4 Get the best of 5 Surveil 6 Hilarious joke 7 “___ walks into a bar ...”

8 Bullfight beasts 9 Words after an insult 10 Indira Gandhi’s garment 11 Kills an enemy, in gaming slang 12 “___ people ...”

16 Some police dept. employees 18 No longer burdened by 21 Spin stat 22 “Mazes and Monsters” author Rona 23 Australian gems 24 “Seinfeld” surname 29 Woofers’ output 30 “___ Frutti” (Little Richard hit)

32 “Can’t be” 34 They may be bear markets 35 “I’ll have what ___ having” 37 Biblical genealogy word 38 “Drab” color 39 Again and again 41 Portrayed 42 Assuming 47 Field arbiter 49 Brownie ingredient 50 “Based on that ...”

51 Concise 52 18 or 21, usually 54 “The Hunger Games” chaperone 56 Words before Cologne 58 Real estate measurement 59 Some birth control options 60 Tech news site 63 “Whatevs” 64 4x4 vehicle, for short 65 Neither fish ___ fowl

Copyright © 2015 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+ to call. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle No. 0732

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To Apply: Submit resume to the attention of HR 3241 Hickory Valley Road, Chattanooga, TN 37416 and reference job number IDM01 chattanoogapulse.com • June 18-24, 2015 • The Pulse • 29

The Modern Scarlet Letter Alex has first-hand experience of a cycle of cruel failure

“ The more I see this vicious circle felons are placed in close-up, I believe they’re being set up to fail, and then being punished for that failure all over again.”

When officer Alexander D. Teach is not patrolling our fair city on the heels of the criminal element, he spends his spare time volunteering for the Boehm Birth Defects Center.

Donald’s and things were So the company I work for going to be different. Or at has taken a new slant on its least as different as $7.25 an approach to crime by literhour can make things. ally approaching crime. OK, “I appreciate what you’re criminals. telling me here, I really do, Whatever the cause of the but let me ask you this,” he encounter, they are read a said with an air of defeat. message and given options “I’m a 34-year-old man. on a front porch or a roadYeah, I done side rather some foolthan dealing ish things with them when I was and offering young… them such ALEX TEACH hell, I’m after the fact lucky to be alive, but I paid (and usually when blood my debt and here I am. But has already been spilled). what am I supposed to do I’m not giving a class on the now? I’m a felon,” he said method, so please forgive with finality. “What do I got its oversimplification, but to look forward to? Bein’ a the message we’re deliverfry cook? That’s it? Man, ing isn’t the topic here.

I got kids. How am I supStill, though—seems like posed to go legit for minia novel approach, right? mum wage the rest of my Well, that’s because it is. life and take care of my Rather than work on damfamily?” age control and/or hunting He had a point. after the fact, we’re trying Whatever we could ofto get ahead of it. Its success fer, whatever path out of is questioned by outsiders, the darkness and into the primarily because it’s only mind-numbing banality of been on the books about corporate Middle America eight months, and we can’t we could provide, he was compare numbers to previlimited right from the start. ous years just yet, but when He would begin and end we do, we’ll see. whatever career could be Back to the porch. offered at minimum wage.

I had a long talk with a Some “way out.” man named…let’s call him I am aware of the exisDevon. The message I read tence of expungements, was ultimately about acbut like seeing how a hot countability and responsidog is made, I’ve also seen bility, and as it happens, he the process (and expense) was all for it. In fact, he had people have to go to in ora job lined up at a local Mc-

30 • The Pulse • June 18-24, 2015 • chattanoogapulse.com

On The Beat

der to achieve this. (I mentioned “expense,” too, right?) If they had the couple thousand it realistically takes to have it struck from the records, they possibly wouldn’t be having a hard time in the first place.

I am also not advocating an increase in the federally mandated minimum wage.

It exists for a reason and was not intended to be a “what you want” wage, but rather a “what you need” wage.

Incentivizing mediocrity and discouraging bettering oneself skill-wise would actually make things worse in my opinion, so that’s out, too.

No, I truly believe that convicted felons need to have some kind of option, some kind of path they can take, to in some small way redeem themselves, because now I believe we’re just keeping them in a debtor’s prison without walls or bars.

Yes, there have to be consequences to their actions.

Yes, punishment like this is part of why crimes are on the books at all; being a convicted felon is a “this is what will happen” for incentive to avoid committing

felony crimes in the first place. But the more I see this vicious circle felons are placed in close-up, I believe they’re being set up to fail, and then being punished for that failure all over again. I think we can do better.

No amnesty, no “get out of consequences free” cards being offered here, but I think we as a society need to have a sit down and finally have a discussion about this.

Make prison horrible again; make it “punishment” instead of a Motel 6 to truly de-incentivize crimes (and advocate for victims). But if you’re going to release them back into the wild, for Pete’s sake, folks, let’s not be cruel about it.

One, two, three years maybe, then let them aspire to be something more as we demand them to be while being punished. Am I alone here? If so, then let’s just keep them inside the jails (and build more of them)— we’re better at that than any other country in the world.

Or? Let’s talk about it.

What we have isn’t working too well. We have too much talent to not try a different route.

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