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Vol. 10 • No. 46



Chattanooga’s Weekly Alternative

Quel Fromage! Farmstead cheese is creamy, sexy ...and a heck of a lot of work

chow Chattanooga’s ULtIMatE


courtesy of

The Chattanooga Pulse




our fall restaurant guide



good eats



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2 • The Pulse • November 14-20, 2013 • WHSP0114_Pulse_Ad_Maam.indd 1

11/11/13 2:48 PM


L UA UE lse N S u AN N IS he P T T 1S HIO in S ek FA We

Cover Story


Managing Editor Mike McJunkin


Contributing Editor Janis Hashe

By Hannah Shadrick

Contributors Rich Bailey • Rob Brezsny John DeVore • Mike Dobbs • Janis Hashe Marc T. Michael • Ernie Paik • Gary Poole Hannah Shadrick • Alex Teach

“You have to be half-crazy to enter this business,” Nathan Arnold, co-founder and lead cheese maker at Sequatchie Cove Creamery, says to me while leaning over the 750-liter stainless steel vat holding the beginnings of a new batch of blue cheese. He is elbow-deep in the creme brûlée-like curds, inspecting to make sure they are consistent in size.

Editorial Interns Keith King • Chelsea Sokol Art Director Gary Poole Photographers Keren Beddoe • Josh Lang Founded 2003 by Zachary Cooper & Michael Kull


Director of Sales Mike Baskin Account Executives Chee Chee Brown • Julie Brown Rick Leavell • Leif Sawyer • Stacey Tyler Jerry Ware • Candice York

Feature Stories


Offices 1305 Carter St., Chattanooga, TN 37402 Phone 423.265.9494 Fax 423.266.2335 Website Email Calendar

Everything Else


By Marc T. Michael Like so many natives of Utah, Darin Caine seems to spend a lot of time in other places, criss-crossing the country to play in every dive bar, juke joint and honky tonk that would have him.


THE FINE PRINT: The Pulse is published weekly by Brewer Media and is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on music, the arts, entertainment, culture and local news. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publisher may take more than one copy per weekly issue. We’re watching. The Pulse may be distributed only by authorized distributors. © 2013 Brewer Media. All rights reserved.

BREWER MEDIA GROUP Publisher & President Jim Brewer II



t ex




By Rich Bailey Throughout November, Ann Law and Bruce Kaplan are celebrating the 20th anniversary of Barking Legs Theater with an intense month-long schedule jammed with music and dance performances.

4 5 7 11 12 16 18 20 21 21 22



By John DeVore For a country caught up in its own myth of greatness, “12 Years a Slave” is a hard movie to stomach. The South especially doesn’t like to be reminded of the dark corners of our past.



3224 Brainerd Road, Chattanooga, TN Advance Tickets: (423) 529-2233 • November 14-20, 2013 • The Pulse • 3



Voices of Eve

Unknown No More We may never know how many works by female composers have been lost through the centuries. But Choral Arts of Chattanooga is drawing attention to some of the music that hasn’t been lost—or been lost and found. “Voice of Eve” features music by women composers, from medieval to contemporary, will be the focus of the CAC’s fall concert at Second Presbyterian Church on Pine St. in downtown Chattanooga. You’ll get a chance to hear both sacred and secular works, since the first half of the concert includes a medieval piece by Hildegard von Bingen, a Baroque motet by Chiara Margarita Cozzolani, a classical motet by Amalia Herzogin von Sachsen, a modern anthem by Emma Lou Diemer, and a Te


Deum by Amy Beach, the first successful American woman composer. The second half of the concert includes Italian madrigals by Vittoria Aleotti and Maddalena Casulana (the first woman composer in Western musical history to publish her works), three Romantic songs by Fanny Mendelssohn Hensel (older sister of Felix), a poem setting by Lili Boulanger, settings of several English folksongs by Cecilia McDowall, and “Now Touch the Air Softly,” a poem setting by local contemporary composer Susan LaBarr. Make a date to discover a whole new group of composers and the beautiful music they created. — Staff “Voices of Eve: Music of Women Composers,” Choral Arts of Chattanooga. 3 p.m. Sunday, Nov. 17. 2nd Presbyterian Church,

4 • The Pulse • November 14-20, 2013 •

700 Pine St. (423) 877-7050, $15/$5 students.

Share the Warmth

Blankets From the Heart This Season We may not be up north, but the winter still gets cold in Chattanooga. As many as 500 people often sleep outside or in homeless shelters each night, and local resident Jeff Clem decided to do something about the upcoming winter weather: a blanketand-coat drive called Share the Warmth. He is personally collecting gently used blankets, coats, and any other warm clothing, such as socks, sweatshirts, and gloves, to donate to Chattanooga’s homeless. While he has some experience with nonprofit organizations, this is the first time Jeff has done anything to help the homeless. Now, he sees that a single blanket or coat can change someone’s life—and is working to change the lives of Chattanooga’s homeless, one blanket at a time. All donations will be sent to the Chattanooga Rescue Mission. Jeff has currently set up three different drop-off locations—the North River YMCA, Hixson United Methodist Church, and the Susan G. Komen for the Cure office at the Eastgate Town Center. If you can’t make the drop-off locations for any reason, he will bring the collection site directly to you. Just contact Jeff at or the project’s Facebook community Share the Warmth.

With winter coming early this year, the last day for pick-up is November 24, so be sure to visit the collection sites or contact the organization before it gets too cold! — Chelsea Sokol


Meet Your Backyard Neighbor You can frequently spot them at night scurrying across the yard. They are nocturnal, nest in trees and have long, prehensile tails that cause some people to describe them as looking like “giant rats.” But opossums, of which there are more than 60 species, are actually marsupials and so in the same family as kangaroos. They are fascinating creatures, extremely adaptable, which allows them to flourish in close proximity to humans in urban areas. They are highly unlikely to carry rabies, and are immune to the venom of rattlesnakes and cottonmouths. And they do actually “play dead.” Find out everything you ever wanted to know about opossums at the Chattanooga Nature Center this Saturday at 11 a.m. or 2:30 p.m. when the Center presents “Awesome Opossum,” one their new series of talks on animals. Free with admission, $10 adults/$7 kids. Chattanooga Nature Center & Arboretum, 400 Garden Rd. Reservations: (423) 8211160, ext. 0. — Staff


pulse » PICK of the litter


pulse » PICKS

• A curated weekly selection of picks from the Chattanooga Live and Arts & Entertainment calendars by Pulse staffers.

Why wait in line for an oil change? Schedule your next oil change with Change -N- Go. We come to you!


Butch Ross CD Release Party Friday, Nov. 15, 8 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. Admission is $10 and includes a CD. National Mountain Dulcimer champion Sarah Morgan opens.

LIVE ON THE RADIO & WEB Scenic City Roots • The monthly live radio/webcast concert featuring Jill Andrews, Lou Wamp and Bluetastic Fangrass, Great Peacock, and the John Cowan Band. 7 p.m. • Track 29, 1400 Market St. (423) 521-2929,




UTC Chattanooga Singers and Chamber Singers Fall Concert

Camp Out 2 Stamp Out Family Homelessness

• Come experience the vocal prowess of these very talented youngsters as they raise the roof with song. 7:30 p.m. • St. Paul’s Episcopal Church, 305 W. 7th St. (423) 425-4612,

• Unique event where people volunteer to sleep in cardboard boxes to help raise awareness for the homeless. 5 p.m. • First Tennessee Pavilion, 1826 Reggie White Blvd. (423) 756-3891,


“Circle Mirror Transformation”


• Playwright Annie Baker's award-winning play that centers on drama classes at a community center in Vermont. 7:30 p.m. • Theater for the New South, South Chattanooga Recreation Center, 1151 W. 40th St.

come in for daily drink specials!

The only place in Town where you can sing karaoke anyTime.


• soCro takes electronic elements of the European club scene and blends them with Southern hip hop to create a unqiue musical experience. 9 p.m. • JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400,


Whether you are an individual at school or work, the owner of a fleet of vehicles, or the manager of company cars, let us come to you for routine oil changes.

Call 423.228.0450 or go to



Safe • Clean • Affordable

Band Slam Music Festival • Featuring The Communicators, The Zack Dylan Band, Scenic, and The Mountain Cove Bluegrass Band. 6 p.m. • Stratton Hall, 3146 S. Broad St. (423) 667-4332,

be sure to book your holiday party now! check out thursday dollar beer night!

410 market • (423) 757-wing



TWO FLOORS • ONE BIG PARTY • LIVE MUSIC • DANCING • 409 MARKET ST • 423.756.1919 open 7 days a week » full menu until 2am » 21+ » smoking allowed • November 14-20, 2013 • The Pulse • 5

6 • The Pulse • November 14-20, 2013 •

Shades of Green

sandra kurtz

Earth-Friendly Holidays Get crafty, local and fair trade-y this holiday season

They started early this year. Ten catalogs came in my mail today. They have been arriving in scores since before Halloween. It’s sad to think of all those trees lost to paper. And Thanksgiving has been lost in the shuffle. The Christmas decorations and wares are already out in the stores, plus email, TV and radio ads all to entice us to buy-buy-buy for the holiday season (Chanukah, too). At its bottom line, heavy materialism and over-consumption is antienvironment. Was the Grinch right? After all, no gifts would be Earth friendly. In the past, this column would be written for December, but that would be too late this year to remind folks to make Earth-supportive plans for the holidays. Such plans don’t mean less joy. It means we recognize our connections to our planet and its value in sustaining all life. If you give a gift, you want it to bring joy to the recipient, but that can be done

with less damage—or even benefit—to the environment. Bill McKibben has written of the Hundred Dollar Christmas taken up by his church in Vermont. Congregants were encouraged to spend no more than $100 per family for Christmas. It spurred creativity and brought more connectivity to family, community and spirit—not to mention benefitting nature.

And amid the holiday rush, let’s not forget Thanksgiving, the most environmentally friendly holiday and worthy of celebration. When thinking about purchases, consider the embedded energy resources it took

to make the product and the energy cost required to deliver it. Try to avoid items made in China, not because the Chinese made them, but because of the extra transportation fuels needed to come so far plus air and water quality impacts. When you think about that, you will easily turn to local, reusable, or consumable items. Products made from recycled or natural materials are good choices. For the crafty among us, handmade gifts are especially appreciated. The exception to buying locally made products is to purchase fair trade items that benefit the poor in the world as a matter of justice. Further, separating wants from needs will help save the Earth. How badly does one need an indoor flameless marshmallow roaster for $69.95, heated outdoor cat bowls ($49.95), or an automatic flameless LED candle ($39.95) from Hammacher Schlemmer? Can you live without a spinning fork ($15) or an electric cheese

grater w i t h stainless steel drums ($39.95)? All of these items require energy to operate and fossil fuels to make—probably in China. While these are amusing devices, they cause an unnecessary drain on our natural resources. If real environmental costs of materials used in creation of these gifts was incorporated into the price, they would be much more expensive. It’s easy to reduce the cost of holiday party accouterments. There’s a free centerpiece in a back yard made from leaves, cones, evergreens or nuts. Avoid plastic and paper with reusable or compostable plates and utensils. Wrap gifts in reused or recycled paper or a container as part of the gift. Recycle and compost everything possible. Send e-cards. Give “green” gifts that keep giving, like LED light bulbs. They use 75-80 percent less

energy, last 25 times longer and save on air conditioning costs. And amid the holiday rush, let’s not forget Thanksgiving, the most environmentally friendly holiday and worthy of celebration. It reminds us of that truly needed gift from the Earth: Food! Eat more vegetables, like your mother told you. We can feed more people in the world simply by eating less or no meat. That’s a gift we can all give to one another. Sandra Kurtz has been a teacher, the executive director of a nature center, an educational specialist for an energy museum, an environmental community activist, and a board member of several environmental organizations. Visit her website at

A cornucopia of savings, in time for the holidays Books. Music. Movies. We buy, sell & trade. Used Books, CDs, Movies, & More

7734 Lee Highway • Mon-Thu 9am-9pm • Fri-Sat 9am-10pm • Sun 11am-7pm • November 14-20, 2013 • The Pulse • 7


Quel Fromage! Farmstead cheese is creamy, sexy—and a heck of a lot of work

Story by Hannah Shadrick Photos by Keren Beddoe


OU HAVE TO BE HALF-CRAZY TO ENTER THIS BUSINESS,” NATHAN ARNOLD, COfounder and lead cheese maker at Sequatchie Cove Creamery, says to me while leaning over the 750-liter stainless steel vat holding the beginnings of a new batch of blue cheese. He is elbowdeep in the creme brûlée-like curds, inspecting to make sure they are consistent in size. The whey will later be drained off, creating the conditions for the blue cheese curds to dry and age properly. Standing in my hairnet and men’s nonslip clogs, I admire Nathan’s attention to detail and start to wonder, “How does crafting cheese become one’s everyday? When does such a passion develop?” Nathan and Padgett Arnold, the couple behind Sequatchie Cove Creamery, tell their story as one largely born of a need for efficiency and independence. Having always worked for themselves (first in establishing Crabtree Farms before moving on to Sequatchie Cove Farm), Nathan and Padgett are fiercely determined to do work they are passionate about. Moreover, they (along with the Keener family who owns Sequatchie Cove Farm) have the dream of making the farm self-sufficient for several families. All involved knew that this meant some kind of expansion; however, as a small, family-owned, livestock farm, one can’t compete in scale. It could never be feasible to price Sequatchie Cove’s products against a large commercial operation. So, when you can’t make more of something, you simply have to make it better. Nathan put it this way: “When you are a pasture-based farm, your product is grass. Your grass becomes animal protein as meat or milk. So, start there. Ask how you can make your grass (and the protein that follows) more profitable. How can you grow internally? We found we had to make a better value-added product from the raw materials we already had on hand.” Specifically, Nathan began looking at heritage breeds of dual-purpose cattle that are raised for both their meat

and milk. Two birds, if you will. “But we couldn’t just do milk,” Nathan quickly threw in. “You look around the commodity milk market and dairy farms are going bankrupt everyday.” So if you can’t sell your milk as is, how do you move forward? Answer: Add value to the milk by crafting it into an unrepeatable product such as farmstead cheese. “We are making something nobody else can make,” Padgett explained. “Cheese is similar to wine in that you are harnessing the energy of a single place. The flavors of our cheese don’t and can’t exist anywhere else.” The reason for this exclusive flavor is that farmstead cheese begins with raw milk from the farm. As such, the ingredients and process are entirely unique for each cheese maker. The flavors begin in the grass, move through the animal, and present in the milk. For instance, Dancing Fern, a funky cousin of brie that Sequatchie Cove Creamery produces, has become its trademark cheese in the national market. Dancing Fern is highly labor intensive, requiring weekly saltwater washes for months on end. Andrea, Nathan’s assistant cheese maker at Sequatchie Cove Creamery, calls it a “creamy, sexy cheese.” Others obviously agree since it just took third place in the American Cheese Society’s Farmstead Soft Cheese category. Jim Tanner of Bonnie Blue Goat Cheese, another regional, award-winning cheese maker out of Waynesboro, TN, agreed with Padgett’s sentiment on

Farmstead cheese is about community and about relationships.”

8 • The Pulse • November 14-20, 2013 •

the uniqueness of farmstead cheese: “The taste of the cheese is all in the milk. Our goats’ milk changes with the season, with lactation cycles, and with changes in diet.” Because these flavor nuances are noticeable in the end product, the Tanners prefer to keep their chèvre minimally flavored, favoring plain chèvre above all. When I asked Jim for Bonnie Blue’s backstory, he launched in. “It all began with goats. I got my first goat when I was 12 years old. I bought it from my grandma’s cousin for $3. I chased that thing around all summer. Then I sold it back for $3.” Gayle, Jim’s wife and the maker of Bonnie Blue cheese, got her first goat at 21. Between the two of them, Jim and Gayle have more than 100 years of goatraising experience. Gayle made her cheese debut while taking culinary arts courses at a community college in Sacramento. She volunteered for a conference on cheese making and offhandedly offered some of her homemade cheese as an appetizer. After leaving the conference, Gayle got a phone call late that night from her professor who simply said, “Come back and bring all the goat cheese you have.” Her cheese had caught the eye of Lars Kronmark, a world-renowned chef at the Culinary Institute of America. That first recognition turned into a series of awards and accolades, including a recent third-place prize from the American Cheese Society for their Tanasi Tomme cheese. Jim recalls another time Gayle won a prestigious award in the Quady Winery’s blind tasting competition for dessert pairings with their Essencia Orange Muscat wine. “Gayle just brought a plain goat cheesecake laid out on a piece of cut glass. It had a few berries on top, you know. Out of thousands of entries from chefs, Gayle’s farmstead goat cheesecake took first place.” Jim smiled, “The cheese stood on its own.” Now, Gayle makes the cheese at Bonnie Blue and Jim does the marketing and sales. Jim chuckled when I asked him if

this was now his full-time job. “Gayle and I each work about 14 hours a day, 7 days a week to make this happen.” The hardships of the cheese business continue far beyond the long workday. To begin, the start-up costs are enormous. Permits, licenses, building, and equipment all take their toll. More surprising is the very limited information available on cheese making. Nathan at Sequatchie Cove Creamery spent about six years hitting up cheese conferences and cheese makers before actually pouring the concrete for the creamery. Andrea, Nathan’s assistant, worked at the Whole Foods’ cheese counter for years, gathering the vocabulary and palate necessary to understand great cheese. She laments, “There are no degrees or certificate programs on cheese making. Maybe a workshop here and there, but you largely have to figure out things on your own.” A significant part of that “figuring out” is keeping meticulous records. Jim of Bonnie Blue admires his wife Gayle’s work ethic in keeping track of every cheese she’s ever made and the conditions in which they were produced. “She looks back on her records and can figure out exactly what went wrong when a problem pops up.” Nonetheless, perfecting one’s cheese is only the first step. Equally as important for the success of a farmstead cheese-making business is pounding the pavement to get the word out. Padgett

Cheese is similar to wine in that you are harnessing the energy of a single place. The flavors of our cheese don’t and can’t exist anywhere else.”

remembers the (thankfully) past times where she hit every farmer’s market within a day’s drive. Jim talks about coldcalling restaurants everywhere, asking to give cheese demonstrations. “I remember once I told Gayle I was going to call the Peabody Hotel in Memphis and get the chef on the phone. She didn’t think I could do it. But I did. And Chef Andreas is still a customer of ours.” Nathan and Padgett credit the local food movement for much of their success: “We are in a renaissance in America right now of local, artisan foods. That’s how we’re surviving. That, and relationships. Farmstead cheese is about community and about relationships.” Last week, I walked into my interviews with these farmstead cheese makers thinking, “Wonder why these guys got into cheese making…” and I walked out half-crazy for farmstead cheese myself. It is a rare moment in our modern day where we can know the maker and make-up of the product sitting in front of us. What’s more, this kind of cheese making is an intensely thoughtful way to appreciate this place we live. So, next time you go to the farmers market, grab some cheese, build community, and enjoy the flavors of this place. For more information on where to find these cheeses, visit sequatchiecovefarm. com/category/ cheese-creamery and • November 14-20, 2013 • The Pulse • 9


marc t. michael

Dobro on the Go

The Darin Caine Hellhound Express is the real deal


IKE SO MANY NATIVES OF UTAH, DARIN CAINE SEEMS TO SPEND a lot of time in other places. The self-taught guitarist started touring five years ago. Criss-crossing the country to play in every dive bar, juke joint and honky tonk that would have him, his mastery of the dobro has made him something of a “must-have” for live music venues.

His power trio consisting of himself, Dave Bowen on bass and Omar Vargas on drums has logged more miles in five years than most bands do in ten, and the upshot of that is that once every six to eight weeks he makes a stop in Chattanooga, usually appearing at The Honest Pint. For fans of the blues, particularly primitive-style Delta blues, the Hellhound Express is a compulsory show. If you’re not a fan of the blues, perhaps you need to see them anyway. It may be that you simply haven’t heard the blues done right. Tall, thin (I estimate Darin to be about 6’6” and all of 145 pounds), in his trademark suit it is open for debate whether Darin looks the part of classic bluesman or classic undertaker. Given the nefarious origin myths of his musical style, perhaps the look is meant to represent a little of both. Looks don’t count for much though, unless you have the

If you want smoldering Mississippi jukejoint blues so real that it leaves a taste of cheap corn liquor in your mouth, you listen to these guys.”

honest music

chops, and when Vargas comes in with the lush-sounding ride cymbal over Bowen’s rock solid (if subdued) bass line and the first liquid metal glissandos of the dobro cry out there is little doubt that the Hellhound Express has the chops in abundance. There are a number of ways to approach playing music. Commonly, especially among younger musicians, the pressure is high to innovate, to play something no one else ever played before and while this lofty goal can produce some truly phenomenal music, it can also wind up a train wreck of unlistenable junk (with the odds favoring the latter). I’m not saying there is no room for balalaika in death metal, but there probably isn’t unless you’re relying on novelty more than talent. Indeed, there are some rather famous artists (I will not name them as I do not wish my house to be burned down by the “true believers”) who built careers on being different for the sake of being different. I can appreciate the technical virtuosity of that, but the sheer math of the

music and the odd time signatures and unusual modal shifts frequently seems more like an exercise than an expression, and I for one have no interest in watching (or listening to) other people exercise. Darin and company are the opposite of that. Taking a more classical approach, they stay within the well-defined parameters of their musical style, but this focus on form allows them to perfect their art in a way less disciplined performers never can. If you want proto-blues fusion with

a subtle undercurrent of Balkan folk music, go find some. If you want smoldering Mississippi juke-joint blues so real that it leaves a taste of cheap corn liquor in your mouth, you listen to these guys. On the chance that you can’t get out to see them live (although you really, really

should) there are a few albums available. The latest, Dobro Mojo, is a short sampling of seven tunes, a fairly even mix of traditional pieces and originals. A testament to the skill of the players (Caine in particular) is that the transition on the album between original and cover is seamless. Nothing seems out of place. Caine’s own tunes could easily have been written a century ago. Even as he pays homage to the likes of Bo Diddley and Muddy Waters he seems to take his place among them, and it isn’t hard to imagine there is some long-forgotten sun-baked boarding house on the outskirts of Memphis where the walls are covered with pictures of the vagabond musicians who have stayed there. Somewhere in the back, between the pics of “Big Boy” Crudup and Elmore James is a cracked, fading black-andwhite picture of a tall, lanky undertaker with the inscription “Caine—‘27” scrawled across the bottom. You can find the music of the Darin Caine Hellhound Express on reverbnation, and on Facebook. There are many, many tunes available for download and the premise is download it, listen, and if you like it, make a donation. I cannot recommend this enough. Real musicians are worth supporting, real music is worth paying for and Darin and the boys are as real as it gets.

local and regional shows

Roots Of A Rebellion with Nick Lutsko, Yakap [$5] Five 40 with Mario Diaz & The Steady Vibes [$5]

Thu, Nov 14 Wed, Nov 20

9pm 9pm

Live Trivia every Sunday from 4-6pm, followed by Live Music Sunday, November 24: Molly Maguires [Free]

Full food menu serving lunch and dinner. 11am-2am, 7 days a week. 35 Patten Parkway * 423.468.4192 *

10 • The Pulse • November 14-20, 2013 •

Between the Sleeves

record reviews • ernie paik

Sometimes You Just Gotta Go There Niko Case Exorcises, Staer Unleashes

Neko Case The Worse Things Get, The Harder I Fight, The Harder I Fight, The More I Love You (Anti)


en years ago, singer Neko Case made a wise move by declining an offer by Playboy magazine to pose au naturel, obviously not wanting her impressive musical career to be overshadowed by her chest. This does raise a question to consider: what will be Neko Case’s legacy? For the last half-century, most music artists generally aren’t allowed (in the nebulous, unspoken sense) to simply concentrate on one thing. While blessed with an incredible voice, Case has often fiercely expressed her own personal artistic vision, primarily writing her own poetic material for her proper studio efforts, and she’s no slouch as an art designer, also, garnering a Grammy nomination with Kathleen Judge for the packaging of Middle Cyclone. It’s like Case doesn’t want to be pigeonholed as just a singer, or more specifically, a country singer. Case’s latest album has a dark

Staer Daughters (Horse Arm/Gaffer)

urgency, often pointed as if directed at a particular individual; it’s distinguished from earlier albums with a fire, crudeness and occasional vulgarity, as if Case had violently exorcized her thoughts and threw them onto paper. The scattered gender themes are obvious, like on the rock highlight “Man� or “I’m From Nowhere� which cites her “candied fist,� but there’s a broader theme at work, about the frighteningly liberating state of being independent. The songs’ intentions are mostly apparent, except for a few trademark Neko Case cryptic moments, like the line “Sang my weight in metric trash, trip the light in Saturn’s embrace� in “Local Girl,� and Case seems to let her words express the power rather than her voice, which is somewhat of a shame—the arrangements don’t show off how dazzling her voice can be. However, several moments are shiver-inducing, including

a stark cover of Nico’s “Afraid� and the devastating “Nearly Midnight, Honolulu� about a mother publically berating her child. The album continues Case’s trajectory away from country music and away from being considered merely a “singer� rather than “singer/ songwriter,� and although not as ultimately satisfying as certain previous efforts, it makes this writer glad to understand that this is exactly the type of album that Case needed to make.


he unclassifiable power trio from Norway, Staer, is a refreshingly potent, twisty and confrontational blast of winding complexity, not avowing allegiance to any particular single camp yet seemingly drawing from heavy progrock, noise-rock, thrash, metal, ambient metal and avant-jazz on its latest six-song album, Daughters. Bassist Markus Hagen and drummer Thore Warland

swiftly gallop like samurai warriors on horseback through a shadowy murk with guitarist Kristoffer Riis providing heavily-treated guitar parts that paint a background landscape brimming with peculiar details, with uneasiness, disquieting, unplaceable sounds and menacing squeals. “Daughters Iâ€? sets the mind and body reeling with its intricate structures and echoing blows until the last minute, when hell is unleashed in an aural torrent. On numbers such as “Daughters II,â€? Hagen serves up crunchy, thick and fuzzy bass lines, going deep yet nimbly gliding, somewhat reminiscent of Bill Laswell yet more restless, and that track has an unusual vibe, being entracing without being outwardly funky or too stern. The eight-minute-long “One Million Love Unitsâ€? uses awkward silences to great effect, pierced by a repeated stream of quick drum-roll bursts and crashes, and it manages to sustain interest for its duration by gradually going deeper into a spiral descent into madness. “NeukĂśllnâ€? offers a compelling, persistent lurch and Warland’s tense, non-obvious drum patterns, and the album closes with a track featuring guest saxophonist Kjetil MĂśster, whose demented bleatings and beatings fit right in with the group’s m.o. Daughters is a fascinating, haunted, caffeinated yet controlled death march, with potential crossover appeal for the metal crowd or those who bow at the John Zorn altar (particularly, his extreme-rock, thrashjazz side), unsettling in its atmosphere and impressive in its execution.



JANUARY 2014 16th • EMANCIPATOR ENSEMBLE 17th • BLACKBERRY SMOKE 29th • UMPHREY’S MCGEE đ&#x;”—đ&#x;”— ď˜? Track29 ď˜‘ @TRCK29 ď™ Track_29 đ&#x;“žđ&#x;“ž (423) 521-2929 • November 14-20, 2013 • The Pulse • 11

Chattanooga Live



Memphis Dawls



14 FRI 10p 15 SAT 10p 16 THU 8p 21 FRI 10p 22 SAT 10p 23 WED 10p 27




















FRI 9:30p





THUrsday 11.14 “Pickin’ at the Post” with Bluegrass bands 5 p.m. American Legion Post, Highway 11 N. (423) 582-1337 Bluegrass and Country Jam 6:30 p.m. Grace Nazarene Church, 6310 Dayton Blvd. (423) 842-5919, Scenic City Roots 7 p.m. Track 29, 1400 Market St. (423) 521-2929, Jimmy Harris 7 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055, Jonathan Wimpie 7 p.m. Sugar’s Ribs, 507 Broad St. (423) 508-8956, Open Mic 7:30 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081, Tim Neal and Mike Harris 7:30 p.m. Mexi Wings VII, 5773 Brainerd Rd. (423) 509-8696, Mitch Rossell 8 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644, Open Mike with Hap Henniger 9 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (inside Days

12 • The Pulse • November 14-20, 2013 •

Inn) (423) 634-9191, Roots Of A Rebellion, Nick Lutsko, Yakap 9 p.m. The Honest Pint, 35 Patten Pkwy, (423) 468-4192, Rahsaan Barber Quintet 9 p.m. Barking Legs Theater, 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347, Memphis Dawls 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400,

friday 11.15 Eddie Pontiac 5:30 p.m. El Mason, 2204 Hamilton Pl. Blvd. (423) 894-8726, Tim Lewis 5:30 p.m. El Mason Hixson, 248 Northgate Mall. (423) 710-1201 Binji Varsossa 6 p.m. Cancun Mexican Restaurant & Lounge, 1809 Broad St. (423) 266-1461, Cowboy Gospel Jubilee 7 p.m. Cleveland Cowboy Church, 3040 Blythe Rd., Cleveland. (423) 476-7936, The Half & Half Band 7 p.m. Troy’s Place, 320 Emerson Dr., Ringgold, Ga. (423) 965-8346 Danny Sample/ Dave Walters

7 p.m. 212 Market, 212 Market St. (423) 265-1212, Jimmy Harris 7 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055, Butch Ross & Sarah Morgan 7 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081, Beats Workin’ - Classic Rock, Blues and Dance 8 p.m. Acoustic Café, 61 RBC Dr., Ringgold, GA. (706) 965-2065, Pierce Pettis 8 p.m. Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse, 105 McBrien Rd. (423) 892-4960, Mountain Opry 8 p.m. Walden’s Ridge Civic Center, 2501 Fairmount Pk. (423) 886-3252 Norman and Nancy 8 p.m. Barking Legs Theater, 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347, Bluegrass Dinner Music 8 p.m. Ocoee Dam Deli and Diner, 1223 Highway 64, Ocoee. (423) 338-8184, Pricilla & Lil Rickee 8:30 p.m. The Foundry, 1201 Broad St. (423) 756-3400, Marshall Law Band 8:30 p.m. Jack A’s Chop Shop

Saloon, 742 Ashland Ter. (423) 710-8739, Amanda Rose 9 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (inside Days Inn) (423) 634-9191, SOCRO 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400, The Band Raven 9 p.m. SkyZoo, 5709 Lee Hwy. (423) 468-4533, Queen B & The Well Strung Band 9:30 p.m. Sugar’s Ribs, 507 Broad St. (423) 508-8956, Hillbilly Sins, Higher Choir 10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644, Three & Twenty 10 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919, chattanooga One Night Stand Band 10 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878,

saturday 11.16 John Sosebee 12:30 p.m. Cartecay Vineyards, 5704 Clear Creek Rd. (706) 698-9463,

Chattanooga Live

901 Carter St (Inside Days Inn) 423-634-9191


Roger Alan Wade

Thursday, November 14: 9pm Open Mic with Hap Henninger Friday, November 15: 9pm Amanda Rose Saturday, November 16: 10pm Hap Henninger Tuesday, November 19: 7pm Server/Hotel Appreciation Night

Eddie Pontiac 5:30 p.m. El Mason, 2204 Hamilton Pl. Blvd. (423) 894-8726, Tim Lewis 5:30 p.m. El Mason Hixson, 248 Northgate Mall. (423) 710-1201 Band Slam Music Festival: The Communicators, The Zack Dylan Band, Scenic, The Mountain Cove Bluegrass Band 6 p.m. Stratton Hall, 3146 S. Broad St. (423) 667-4332, Binji Varsossa 6 p.m. Cancun Mexican Restaurant & Lounge, 1809 Broad St. (423) 266-1461, Bluegrass Benefit For Bud Knowles Memorial Scholarship Fund 6 p.m. Harrison Ruritan Club, 5709 Tyner Ln. (423) 344-7848, Kelley McRae Duo, Holly McCormack 7 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081, 24/7 Band + jamming and singing 7 p.m. Red Clay Pickin’ Barn, 1095 Weatherly Switch Tr. (423) 464-3034, facebook. com/RedClayPickinBarn The Hopeful Country Band 7 p.m. Troy’s Place, 320 Emerson Dr., Ringgold, Ga. (423) 965-8346

Jimmy Harris 7 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055, Travis Tritt 8 p.m. Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad St. (423) 757-5156, Lee Bains III & The Glory Fires, Pujol 8 p.m. Sluggo’s North Vegetarian Café, 501 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 752-5224 Gordon Lightfoot Tribute 8 p.m. Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse, 105 McBrien Rd. (423) 892-4960, Pricilla & Lil Rickee 8:30 p.m. The Foundry, 1201 Broad St. (423) 756-3400, DJ Hitman 8:30 p.m. Jack A’s Chop Shop Saloon, 742 Ashland Ter. (423) 710-8739, Wasted 9 p.m. SkyZoo, 5709 Lee Hwy. (423) 468-4533, Bombadil, Birds with Fleas 9 p.m. Barking Legs Theater, 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347, SRO Band 9:30 p.m. Sugar’s Ribs, 507 Broad St. (423) 508-8956, Hap Henniger 10 p.m. The Office,

901 Carter St. (inside Days Inn) (423) 634-9191, Fly By Radio 10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644, Three & Twenty 10 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919, facebook. com/raw.chattanooga

sunday 11.17 Acoustic Gospel Jam 6 p.m. Brainerd United Methodist Church, 4315 Brainerd Rd. (423) 698-5928, Birchwood Family Opry Bluegrass and Gospel 7 p.m. Birchwood Family Opry, 5600 Block Hwy. (423) 284-2452.

monday 11.18 Jerry Watkins, Chuck Robinson, Sharon Foskey 6:30 p.m. Wendy’s East Brainerd, 7655 East Brainerd Rd. (423) 331-7126 Big Band Night 7 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055,

tuesday 11.19 Jim Palmer

7:30 p.m. 1885 Grill, 3914 Saint Elmo Ave. (423) 485-3050,

wednesday 11.20 Eddie Pontiac 5:30 p.m. El Meson Hixson, 248 Northgate Mall, (423) 710-1201 Courtney Daly & Ivan Wilson 7 p.m. Acoustic Café, 61 RBC Dr., Ringgold, Ga. (706) 965-2065, Jimmy Harris 7 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055, Roger Alan Wade 7:30 p.m. Jack A’s Chop Shop Saloon, 742 Ashland Ter. (423) 710-8739, Priscilla & Little Rickee 8:30 p.m. Las Margarita’s, 1101 Hixson Pk. (423) 756-3332, Five 40, Mario Diaz & The Steady Vibes, The Kite Fighters 9 p.m. The Honest Pint, 35 Patten Pkwy, (423) 468-4192,

Map these locations on Send event listings at least 10 days in advance to: calendar@

$5 Pitchers $2 Wells $1.50 Domestics ●

All shows are free with dinner or 2 drinks! Stop by & check out our daily specials! Happy Hour: Mon-Fri: 4-7pm $1 10oz drafts, $3 32oz drafts, $2 Wells, $1.50 Domestics, Free Appetizers

Open for lunch 11am-3pm Thursday-Friday Come enjoy dinner and live entertainment from 5p-11p during our special nights: Monday: Broad Street Blues Band Wednesday: Wine Down Wednesday Thursday: Feel It Thursday with 96¢ cocktails from 5pm-6pm Friday: Jazz | Saturday: Throw Back Night After Party 11pm-3am, 25+ Fri/Sat

Mocha Restaurant & Music Lounge

511 Broad Street, Chattanooga (423) 531-4154 • • November 14-20, 2013 • The Pulse • 13

Spend Thanksgiving with the Pilgrims

Pilgrim Congregational Church


Has Provided the Chattanooga community with a liberal Christian tradition since 1914. Learn more about our mission and activities at

Sunday Worship 11am 400 Glenwood Drive at 3rd Street (423) 698-5682 14 • The Pulse • November 14-20, 2013 •


Rich bailey

The Legs Are Barking, Let ’Em In


HROUGHOUT NOVEMBER, ANN LAW AND BRUCE KAPLAN ARE celebrating the 20th anniversary of Barking Legs Theater with an intense month-long schedule jammed with music and dance performances. I sat down with Bruce and Ann to talk about their 20-year ride in the theater that greets visitors with dangling green mannequin legs. When they moved here from New York City in October 1990, they found very little contemporary original performance art, either music or dance. Once they had a house, Ann began looking for a performance space. Even before starting the theater, Ann was collaborating with other arts organizations through her own nonprofit called COPAC (Contemporary Performing Arts of Chattanooga)—for example, presenting a four-week series of dance film presentations at the Hunter Museum and a night of jazz and tap with the Chattanooga A f r ic a n-A mer ican Museum.

“From the very beginning we were trying to create community, trying to create diversity inside this arts scene,” she says. Barking Legs opened in December 1993, primarily as a space for Ann to do her own dance work and host contemporary arts performances. She presented challenging work in a vein that had not been seen in Chattanooga and set out to build an audience for it. “I’ve always been interested in that kind of art,” says Ann. “I’m not a regular seasonal subscriber to the symphony or the ballet. I’ve always been more interested in how art makes social changes, so that was work I wanted to bring in and introduce to my community.” One of first performances she presented was "Tom and Sally," a play about the hidden sexual relationship between President Thomas Jefferson and slave Sally Hemings, by playwright Doug Cooney, years before a move version was

rock out With your cork out 1/2 PRIcE bOTTlES OF WINE ON THURSDAy’S TIll clOSING! HAPPy HOUR NIGHTly FROm 3Pm - 7Pm


made. “It was a great way to open up a dialogue to the Chattanooga community about what is racism, how do we feel about biracial marriages and relationships,” she says. Over three consecutive years, she presented a trilogy of plays about growing up as a gay Latino in Texas by Paul BoninRodriguez, who received the first Tennessee Williams Fellowship at the University of the South. “I can take pride in saying I was the first presenter in Chattanooga that presented queer art,” she adds. While Ann was building a contemporary arts audience, Bruce was building a neurology practice, supporting her vision but not actively participating in the theater. After six or seven years, Ann was burning out on being a presenter, and Bruce was feeling a renewed pull toward music. “I grew up as a rock and roller,” Bruce says. “I went from there into playing sort of ‘avant noise’ stuff, the improvised music that got me to become friends with the Shaking Ray Levis, which was a conduit to thinking about relocating here when a job became available.” A saxophonist friend had introduced Bruce and Ann to Dennis Palmer and Bob Stagner, the Shaking Ray Levis, when they performed in New York City. The four quickly became friends, and the Shaking Rays were their connection to Chattanooga. Once they were here, Bruce was attracted to the music of the region and learned to play the mandolin. Together with George Bright, in 1997 he began presenting acoustic music drawing from bluegrass and folk traditions. In 2001, Ann stopped presenting other artists’ work. She still does her own dance concerts, but now Barking Legs more often presents acoustic acts and improvisation-

al or avant-garde music co-produced with the Shaking Ray Levi Society. Ann’s contribution to the anniversary roster was a rousing, sexy-funny multiart collaboration: six “kitchen dances” choreographed by her, inspired by Robert Johnson’s blues classic “Come On in My Kitchen,” and framed by food and drink tastings and spoken word presentations. That evening is, regrettably, in the past now. But it led to a telling exchange. Ann: “I’m so tired of people sitting at a dance concert and going ‘So, uh, what was going on there, what did they mean by that?’” Bruce: “It’s not that we don’t like avantgarde slogs. We’ve been responsible for our share of them and attend them with enthusiasm. This one is not. It’s a fun evening.” Ann: “It’s not about keeping the dance at arms length. It’s about bringing the dance in.” That’s Barking Legs in a nutshell. This month, I heard an improvisational pianist and virtuoso acoustic bluegrass on back-to-back nights. Last month, I saw a group of percussionists make beautiful, hypnotic music on amplified two-byfours. Last week I saw cheeky dances with knives inspired by a long-dead bluesman. Despite its extreme diversity—or maybe because it—it’s all art with heart, played and presented up close and personal without pretension or hype by real people sharing what they love. Check it out. Even the avant-garde stuff is more accessible than it sounds. Those two-byfours were really amazing. Upcoming anniversary shows at Barking Legs include Rahsaan Barber (modern jazz, Nov. 14), Norman and Nancy Blake’s Rising Fawn String Ensemble (bluegrass, Nov. 15), and Bombadil with Birds With Fleas (folk/pop, Nov. 16). Full schedule at

mith’s Black s astro uB




mON - THU: 11Am-10Pm FRI-SAT: 11Am-mIDNIGHT SUN: 11Am-3Pm bRUNcH

809 mARkET STREET (423) 702-5461 • November 14-20, 2013 • The Pulse • 15

“One of America’s Top 101 places to visit”

Arts & Entertainment


National Geographic, USA 101

THUrsday 11.14

for more info call 706.820.2531

See ...This holiday season, make plans to

SEE ROCK CITY this holiday season!

Opens November 22 Nightly from 6-9 pm at Rock City · Open Christmas Night · Closed Christmas Eve

“Raggedy Ann and Andy” 7:30 & 11:30 a.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534, “A Sanders Family Christmas” 2:30 p.m. Cumberland County Playhouse, 221 Tennessee Ave., Crossville. (931) 484-5000, Ooltewah Farmer’s Market 3 p.m. Ooltewah Nursery & Landscape Co. Inc., 5829 Main St. (423) 238-9775, “Lean In: Women In Executive Leadership” lecture by Rev. Dr. Jo Anne Lyon 7 p.m. Lee University Humanities Building, 1250 Parker St. NE (423) 478-1131. Keyz Brown improvisational jazz concert 4 p.m. Ari’s Harbor Light, 9718 Hixson Pk. (423) 843-2800, Three Blind Wines 6 p.m. Stratton Hall, 3146 S. Broad St. (615) 255-1167. Art + Issues: Nature vs. Nurture 6 p.m. Hunter Museum, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-267-0968, “Mystery of the Redneck Italian Wedding” 7 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839, “Ring Round the Moon” 7:30 p.m. Proctor Hill Theatre, 735 University Ave. Sewanee. (931) 598-1000,

16 • The Pulse • November 14-20, 2013 •

CSO presents Mozart’s “Requiem” 7:30 p.m. Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad St. (423) 757-5156, “Suite Surrender” 7:30 p.m. Cumberland County Playhouse, 221 Tennessee Ave., Crossville. (931) 484-5000, “Circle Mirror Transformation” 7:30 p.m. Theater for the New South, South Chattanooga Recreation Center, 1151 W. 40th St. Tim Wilson 7:30 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233.

friday 11.15 Southern Appalachian Artist Guild National Juried Show 10 a.m. Blue Ridge Mountains Arts Association, W. Main St. (706) 632-2144, Wine Tasting with Argyle Winery 6:30 p.m. Easy Bistro, 203 Broad St. (423) 266-1121, Camp Chair Cinema: “Climb to Katahdin” 7 p.m. Outdoor Chattanooga, 200 River St. (423) 643-6888, “Mystery of the Nightmare Office Party” 7 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839, “Opera In The Dark” opera musical performance by Artisti Affamati 7 p.m. Foursquares Business

Center, 1200 Mountain Creek Rd. (423) 667-0928, Unwind for the Holidays 7 p.m. One North Shore Penthouse Club Room, 200 Manufacturers Rd. (423) 752-3211 Little Smokey 7 p.m. Artsy-U, 5084 S. Ter., East Ridge. (423) 321-2317, “Ragtime” 7 p.m. Cumberland County Playhouse, 221 Tennessee Ave., Crossvile. (931) 484-5000, UTC Chattanooga Singers and Chamber Singers Fall Concert 7:30 p.m. St. Paul’s Episcopal Church, 305 W. 7th St. (423) 425-4612, “Raggedy Ann & Andy” 7:30 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534, “Circle Mirror Transformation” 7:30 p.m. Theater for the New South, South Chattanooga Recreation Center, 1151 W. 40th St. Tim Wilson 7:30, 9:30 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233, Rising Fawn String Ensemble 9 p.m. Barking Legs Theater, 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347, Tim Pulnik 9:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839, Melting Pot Song Book 2013 10:15 p.m. Cumberland County

Playhouse, 221 Tennessee Ave., Crossville. (931) 484-5000,

saturday 11.16 “Purple Stride,” benefits The Pancreatic Cancer Action Network 8 a.m. Renaissance Park, River St. Photo Safari at the Aquarium 8:30 a.m. Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 262-0695, Running with Sasquatch 9 a.m. Ivy Academy, 8443 Dayton Pk. (704) 500-5985, runningwithsasquatch. Holiday Open House 9:30 a.m. Sugary Creations, 3626 Ringgold Rd. East Ridge. (423) 421-3108, Community Line Dance Workshop 10 a.m. Allemande Hall, 7400 Standifer Gap Rd. (423) 309-6842, “2013 Sanders Family Christmas” 10:30 a.m. Cumberland County Playhouse, 221 Tennessee Ave., Crossville. (931) 484-5000, “The J Play” 10:30 a.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534, Last Full Measure of Devotion 1:30 p.m. Chattanooga National Cemetary, 1200 Bailey Ave. (423) 752-5213 Artful Yoga 1:30 p.m. Hunter Museum, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-267-0968,

Arts & Entertainment


Tim Pulnik Campfires and Hayrides at Cloudland 2 p.m. Cloudland Canyon State Park, 122 Cloudland Canyon Park Rd. (706) 657-4050 “Raggedy Ann & Andy” 2:30 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534, “Ragtime” 2:30 p.m. Cumberland County Playhouse, 221 Tennessee Ave. Crossville. (931) 484-5000, “Going Southern” by Deborah Levine - Afternoon Tea, Author Talk and Book Signing 3 p.m. English Rose Tearoom, 1401 Market St. (423) 265-5900, Camp Out 2 Stamp Out Family Homelessness 5 p.m. First Tennessee Pavilion, 1826 Reggie White Blvd. (423) 756-3891, “Mystery of Flight 138” 5:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839, “Opera In The Dark” opera musical performance by Artisti Affamati 7 p.m. Foursquares Business Center, 1200 Mountain Creek Rd. (423) 667-0928, Tim Wilson 7, 9:30 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233, “Ring Round the Moon” 7:30 p.m. Proctor Hill Theatre, 735 University Ave. Sewanee. (931) 598-1000, “2013 Sanders Family

Theology on Tap

Christmas” 7:30 p.m. Cumberland County Playhouse, 221 Tennessee Ave., Crossville. (931) 484-5000, “Circle Mirror Transformation” 7:30 p.m. Theater for the New South, South Chattanooga Recreation Center, 1151 W. 40th St. “Mystery of the Facebook Fugitive” 8 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839, Tim Pulnik 10:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839,

sunday 11.17 Coca Cola Big Band Day 11 a.m. Chattanooga Market, 1829 Carter St. (423) 648-2496, “Raggedy Ann & Andy” 2:30 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534, “Suite Surrender” 2:30 p.m. Cumberland County Playhouse, 221 Tennessee Ave., Crossville. (931) 484-5000, Voices Of Eve: Music Of Women Composers 3 p.m. Second Presbyterian Church, 700 Pine St. (423) 266-2828, Keyz Brown improvisational jazz concert 4 p.m. Ari’s Harbor Light, 9718 Hixson Pk. (423) 843-2800, North Chick Creek

6 p.m. Artsy-U, 5084 S. Ter., East Ridge. (423) 321-2317, Tim Pulnik 7 p. m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233,

monday 11.18 3 Leaves 5:30 p.m. Artsy-U, 5084 S. Ter., East Ridge. (423) 321-2317, Story Slam 7:30 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081,

tuesday 11.19 “Suite Surrender” 1 p.m. Cumberland County Playhouse, 221 Tennessee Ave., Crossville. (931) 484-5000, Keyz Brown improvisational jazz concert 4 p.m. Ari’s Harbor Light, 9718 Hixson Pk. (423) 843-2800, Sunset Love 7 p.m. Artsy-U, 5084 S. Ter., East Ridge. (423) 321-2317, Theology on Tap 7 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081,

wednesday 11.20 Open Studio - You pick the Painting! 7 p.m. Artsy-U, 5084 S. Ter.. East Ridge. (423) 321-2317, UTC Orchestra Fall Concert

7 p.m. UTC Fine Arts Center, UTC Fine Arts Center, Vine & Palmetto Sts. (423) 425-4269,

Named “One of the Ten Most Incredible Cave Waterfalls on Earth” World Reviewer

ongoing “Meditations: New Work by Scott Hillard & Steve Olszewski” 10 a.m. - 5 p.m. Mon-Sat, 1 - 5 p.m. Sun. River Gallery, 400 E. 2nd St. (423) 265-5033, “Work by John Stone” 11 a.m. - 5 p.m. Tues.- Sat. AVA Gallery, 30 Frazier Ave. (423) 265-4282, “Tour d’Art” 11 a.m. - 6 p.m., Mon-Sat, 1 - 5 p.m. Sun. In-Town Gallery, 26A Frazier Ave. (423) 267-9214, “Fine Art Landscapes” Reflections Gallery, 6922 Lee Hwy. (423) 892-3072, “Miki Boni” 11 a.m, - 7 p.m. Mon-Sat Graffiti: A Hill City Art Joint, 505 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 400-9797, Rock City Raptors 11 a.m. - 3 p.m. Fri-Sat, 11 a.m. - 3 p.m. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd., Lookout Mtn, Ga. Chattanooga Ghost Tours 9 p.m. nightly. The Little Curiosity Shoppe, 138 Market St. (423) 821-7125,

Map these locations on Send event listings at least 10 days in advance to: calendar@



NEW FOR 2013: Climbing Tower & ZIP Ride!

Aerial Adventure.

423.821.2544 • November 14-20, 2013 • The Pulse • 17

Tech Saving Mobile Lives

rich bailey

Still Floating After All These Years Co.Lab entrepreneurs pay it forward


EXT WEEK, CO.LAB PRESENTS ITS FOURTH ANNUAL Will This Float?, where would-be company founders present their business ideas, as if to investors, and compete for “best pitch” honors. The official prize is $300 and 20 hours of accounting and legal services, but the intangible rewards—including connections and validation—are much greater. 1906 Gunbarrel Rd. 423-486-1668

(Next to GiGi’s Cupcakes)

M-F 10am-7pm Sat: 11a-4pm Closed Sunday

This could be yours...

Buy. Sell. Trade.

The pitches that won the first three competitions are still floating strong. SupplyHog, Variable Technologies, and RootsRated are now companies with investors, employees, products and sales. Variable Technologies is in the final stages of a competition staged by Walmart that will decide whether the company will carry its Node sensor device in Walmart stores nationwide. Two of those founders—Nathan Derrick of SupplyHog and Fynn Glover of RootsRated—will judge the next competition on Nov. 19 and present updates on their progress from pitch to profitability. I sat down with them for a preview. SupplyHog won the first Will This Float? competition in 2010. The idea—an online marketplace for residential construction materials—seems like no-brainer. I was surprised that turf wasn’t already staked out and fiercely contested by Home Depot and Lowe’s. But no, says Derrick, there is no comprehensive marketplace that offers 100,000 products, as SupplyHog does. “I had an early idea I wanted to try out and see if it had legs, so I entered the contest to see if anyone else believed in the same thing I believed in,” he says. “The crowd seemed to get it. At the time, it seemed like ‘All right, great, I made it,’ but it’s been a long road since then.” Since winning Will This Float?, he has

18 • The Pulse • November 14-20, 2013 •

brought in a cofounder, gone through startup incubator programs in Philadelphia and San Francisco, raised venture capital, developed an ecommerce platform, and hired 13 people. He started selling online about a year ago. The company has shipped building materials to every state but Hawaii and has oversees investors who are interested in bringing th idea to their countries. Derrick isn’t releasing sales numbers, but says the company is selling to a small contractor base in the Chattanooga area and nationwide to do-it-yourselfers that can’t find what they need in their hometown. “Contractors typically know where to go and get the supplies they need,” he says. “An early adopter for us is used to searching Google and finding shoes or clothes or electronics, so they’re finding us and making purchases.” He says SupplyHog does very well in organic searches because a lot of the building products they offer have never been online before. Fynn Glover won the third Will This Float? a year ago with RootsRated, a curated “expert’s guide” to the five-to-ten best places in a city for each outdoor sport. “Looking for this kind of information online can be tedious and time consuming,” he says. “The information is very fragmented. So to have that feedback from such a large audience—including the panel of judges that had such depth in terms

Glover’s and Derrick’s paths have woven together in a way that seems emblematic of the entrepreneurial ecosystem Co.Lab is fostering in Chattanooga.”

of developing sustainable businesses — proved to some early investors that we were onto something.” The site has grown from 15 to 45 cities, and some of the company’s early investment has been used to create a new website that launched this month and to refine RootsRated’s content model. “Content publishing is an interesting business. How publishers make money at this point is very much the topic of day,” says Glover. “We take the position that we are in the business of creating stories, not ads. That design direction is unique in the outdoor industry, and it’s been met with a lot of enthusiasm from the big brands.” Marketers essentially sponsor the production of content for select target cities. For example, in 2014 Marmot, the clothing and equipment company, will sponsor content in San Francisco, Jackson Hole, Wyoming and Chattanooga. Glover’s and Derrick’s paths have woven together in a way that seems emblematic of the entrepreneurial ecosystem Co.Lab is fostering in Chattanooga. Glover saw Derrick present at the first Will This Float?, but they didn’t meet until a year later in Philadelphia, where Derrick was developing his company further in a startup incubator and Glover was testing his business model in a larger city. A year later, both were in San Francisco. Derrick had been accepted into 500 Startups, an accelerator program that includes up to $250,000 in angel funding, and Glover was applying to the program. He didn’t make the final cut, but he learned a lot from the program’s feedback and from spending time with Derrick. “We’ve been in very close contact ever since,” says Glover. “He’s been highly valuable in helping me secure funding and meet investors, and in giving strategic advice based on what he’s been through.” Will This Float? Tuesday, November 19, 6-9 p.m. Co.Lab, 55 E. Main St. (423) 648-2195


john devore

The Shadows of the Past “12 Years a Slave” wrenching—and essential


OR A COUNTRY CAUGHT UP IN ITS OWN MYTH OF GREATness, “12 Years a Slave” is a hard movie to stomach. The South especially doesn’t like to be reminded of the dark corners of our past.

So many of us hide behind lofty notions of states’ rights and heritage, remembering the Civil War as a valorous defense of a simple way of life, while ignoring that the antebellum culture was founded on the right to own other people. No one in history has clean hands—brutality, violence, degradation and evil are as responsible for forward progress as art, music, and charity. But ever so often, we need to be reminded that our cities were built on the broken backs of immigrants, that we have a history of oppression, and that there was a time when human bondage and freedom were asserted as core tenets of our ideology without any hint of irony. “12 Years a Slave” is that reminder. It is the most powerful and emotionally charged film of the year, one that lingers in the mind long after the credits roll. The film is based on the true account of Solomon Northrup (Chiwetel Ejiofor), a freeborn black man living Saratoga Springs, New York. An accomplished violinist and carpenter, Northrup owned a house, had a wife and children, and was well educated and well spoken. While on a brief tour with a circus in Washington D.C. to earn extra money during a slow period, Northrup was kidnapped into slavery by his employers. The film is an account of his experiences as a slave, ranging from the conditions of the slave markets, the treatment of slaves under an “honest” owner and the depraved practices of

a “slave breaker”. The film captures the hopelessness of slavery. It’s an unblinking look at how destructive and foul a society built on possessing another human being is. There is no goodness in this film—even the slavers that treat their slaves generously are shown as shortsighted, blind to their own prejudices. Benedict Cumberbatch plays one such planter, a Baptist preacher named William Ford. Ford purchases Northrup and another woman who shared the journey from Washington. He expresses regret at separating the woman from her children, but sells her quickly when her grief disturbs his wife during a mandatory slave church service. There is a constant defense of the institution of slavery through Biblical passages, quoted by slavers both “good” and bad. Some use it in a mocking, accusing tone, while others preach it as guidance in a fallen world. The film highlights the evil in both views. Of particular note in the film is the fiery performance by Michael Fassbender as the angry, drunk, malevolent slaver Edwin Epps. The dark recesses of his spitting rage, his lecherous desire for a young slave girl named Patsey, his own self loathing and hatred are layered into a genuine portrait of a man that is as much a victim of slavery as a perpetra-

tor of it. Northrup is unfairly forced into this world, robbed of life and liberty. He spends all his time clinging to hope that he will one day escape from it. Epps was born into that evil, was shaped by it, and ruined because of it. He is chained in the cave, watching the shadows on the wall. Northrup has at least seen the shadows from the outside, making him freer in a sense than the man who withholds his freedom. Of course, the film belongs to Ejiofor, who owns the role as only an actor of his caliber can. In a scene at the graveside of an older slave who fell dead in the field from exhaustion, we see Northrup join in the singing of a spiritual for the first time. He sings because there is nothing left in him, no hope but the eternal, no comfort but the song. It is one of the most compelling performances I’ve seen in any film. As the title suggests, Northrup eventually is freed and makes it home to his family. For American audiences, this modest degree of happiness in a deeply dark film is a requirement. But there was no escape for the vast majority of slaves in the South. The sorrow and anguish of bondage continued until death. A few words during the end credits don’t hammer that point home as well as they should. Regardless, “12 Years a Slave” is an important film, one that all Americans should see—it is essential viewing. 12 Years A Slave Starring: Chiwetel Ejiofor, Michael Fassbender, Brad Pitt, Sarah Paulson Directed by: Steve McQueen Rating: R Running time: 134 minutes

330 Frazier Ave. Suite 116 Chattanooga, Tennessee (423) 266-6661 • November 14-20, 2013 • The Pulse • 19

Spirits Within

mike dobbs

Meet the Jack Daniels Family Our man on the bar stool meets JD & Friends at Urban Stack


RAVEL ANYWHERE OUTSIDE NORTH America and then tell someone you’re from Tennessee—it’s most likely they will associate that with either Elvis or Jack Daniels. You would be better off skipping the geography lesson and just say, “I’m from where Jack Daniels is made.” They’ll get that.

Jack has been flowing out of the famous oak barrels in Lynchburg, Tennessee since 1866 and is the biggestselling whiskey in the world with over 11 million cases a year. That’s a lot of firewater to come out of a small town where you can’t even buy the stuff! I visited Urban Stack in downtown Chattanooga to have a gander at their very impressive menu of whiskeys. They currently stock more than 120 different selections at their bar. But this week, I’m concentrating on four of Lynchburg’s finest. Of course, the famous Jack Daniels Black, labeled Old No. 7 is in order, and Urban Stack has their own twist on the most classic cocktail of them all, Jack & Coke. They call it a “Tennessee Jed” and use a reduction of the cola’s syrup that makes for a thicker,

Jack has been flowing out of the famous oak barrels in Lynchburg, Tennessee since 1866 and is the biggest-selling whiskey in the world with over 11 million cases a year.”

more concentrated flavor with less water to get in the way. You can really hunker down with one of these to get the evening started off right. That sweetness on top of the charcoal-filtered Jack is pert-near perfection. The other labels I moved on to were to be sipped standing alone over the rocks. I don’t mean ice, either. They use real rocks in the glasses down there. So when you have a whiskey, that’s all it is and none of that pesky H2O is going to crash the party. The Jack Daniels Honey is just what it says. It’s our old pal Jack infused with a bit of honey liqueur. The sweet honey aroma is prevalent in this one and although it stands just fine on its own, it’s also well suited to be placed with iced tea, which is what I’ll want to be trying next time. But there are two more bottles winking over at me. Gentleman Jack is a relative new kid on the block. Having only been around since 1988, it quickly made a name for itself among discriminating whiskey palates. This wonderfully silky beverage is charcoal filtered a second time, as opposed to No. 7’s single Lincoln County process.That gives this Southern Gent a slightly floral vanilla nose that ultimately leads to a crisp, clean finish. This one on rocks is all ya need. Keep that dang soda-pop away from me when I’m having this one. Lastly, I’m gonna try out Jack Daniels Single Barrel. This is a concoction right out of the

hand of Jimmy Bedford, the sixth master distiller, and the top of the mark to come out of the distillery. Each barrel is sampled and graded and is individually selected to carry the label. It’s a little more dry to the taste and noticeably darker, making this excellent 94-proof whiskey very woody and earthy. I’m glad I saved it for last because of the heavier flavor. It’s an obvious choice for a finisher. It’s got relaxation down to a science. Ahhh....just leave me be. Cheers.

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the market. Available in Coconut, White, and Coconut Spiced. 20 • The Pulse • November 14-20, 2013 •



One of the most popular scotches in the world. Glenmorangie Single Highland Malt Whisky is famous for its complexity and few whiskies can boast such a range of subtle notes and flavors.

Willett Pot Still Reserve Bourbon Bottled in the most unique bottle you’ll find when it comes to bourbon. It boasts a beautiful mahogany color and imparts notes of honey and citrus on the palate.

Ciroc Vodka Five times distilled from fine French grapes, Ciroc has raised the bar in the ultra premium vodka segment. Incredible with white grape juice, or on the rocks. Several flavors available, including Peach, Berry, Coconut, and new Amaretto.

Free Will Astrology SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Sweetness is good. Sweetness is desirable. To be healthy, you need to give and receive sweetness on a regular basis. But you can’t flourish on sweetness alone. In fact, too much of it may be oppressive or numbing. I’m speaking both literally and metaphorically: To be balanced you need all of the other tastes, including saltiness, sourness, bitterness, and savoriness. From what I understand, you are headed into a phase when you’ll thrive on more bitterness and savoriness than usual. To get an idea of what I mean, meditate on what the emotional equivalents might be for bitter tastes like coffee, beer, and olives, and for savory tastes like mushrooms, cheese, spinach, and green tea. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): When you procrastinate, you avoid doing an important task. Instead, you goof off, doing something fun or simply puttering around wasting time. But what if there were a higher form of procrastination? What if you could avoid an important task by doing other tasks that were somewhat less important but still quite valuable? Here’s what that might look like for you right now: You could postpone your search for the key to everything by throwing yourself into a project that will give you the key to one small part of everything.

world celebrate a holiday called Independence Day, memorializing a time when they broke away from another nation and formed a separate state. I encourage you to create your own personal version of this festival. It could commemorate a breakthrough moment in the past when you escaped an oppressive situation, a turning point when you achieved a higher level of autonomy, or a taboo-busting transition when you started expressing your own thoughts and making your own decisions with more authority. By the way, a fresh opportunity to take this kind of action is available to you. Any day now might be a good time to declare a new Independence Day.

can look at a picture for a week and never think of it again,” said painter Joan Miró. “You can also look at a picture for a second and think of it all your life,” he added. The coming days are likely to bring you none of the former kind of experiences and several of the latter, Cancerian. It’s a numinous time in your long-term cycle: a phase when you’re likely to encounter beauty that enchants you and mysteries that titillate your sense of wonder for a long time. In other words, the eternal is coming to visit you in very concrete ways. How do you like your epiphanies? Hot and wild? Cool and soaring? Comical and lyrical? Hot and soaring and comical and wild and cool and lyrical?

ARIES (March 21-April 19): There’s something resembling a big red snake slithering around in your mind these days. I don’t mean that literally, of course. I’m talking about a big red imaginary snake. But it’s still quite potent. While it’s not poisonous, neither is it a pure embodiment of sweetness and light. Whether it ends up having a disorienting or benevolent influence on your life all depends on how you handle your relationship with it. I suggest you treat it with respect but also let it know that you’re the boss. Give it guidelines and a clear mandate so that it serves your noble ambitions and not your chaotic desires. If you do that, your big red snake will heal and uplift you.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): There’s a new genre of erotic literature: dinosaur porn. E-books like In the Velociraptor’s Nest and Ravished by the Triceratops tell tall tales about encounters between people and prehistoric reptiles. I don’t recommend you read this stuff, though. While I do believe that now is a good time to add new twists to your sexual repertoire and explore the frontiers of pleasure, I think you should remain rooted in the real world, even in your fantasy life. It’s also important to be safe as you experiment. You really don’t want to explore the frontiers of pleasure with cold-blooded beasts. Either travel alone or else round up a warm-blooded compassion specialist who has a few skills in the arts of intimacy.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): In his utopian novel Looking Backward, American author Edward Bellamy wrote a passage that I suspect applies to you right now: “It is under what may be called unnatural, in the sense of extraordinary, circumstances that people behave most naturally, for the reason that such circumstances banish artificiality.” Think of the relief and release that await you, Capricorn: an end to pretending, a dissolution of deception, the fall of fakery. As you weave you way through extraordinary circumstances, you will be moved to act with brave authenticity. Take full advantage.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In my astrological opinion, almost nothing can keep you from getting the love you need in the coming days. Here’s the only potential problem: You might have a mistaken or incomplete understanding about the love you need, and that could interfere with you recognizing and welcoming the real thing. So here’s my prescription: Keep an open mind about the true nature of the love that you actually need most, and stay alert for the perhaps unexpected ways it might make itself available.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “I have your back” is an American expression that could also be rendered as “I’m right behind you, ready to help and defend you” or “I’m ready to support you whenever you’ve got a problem.” Is there anyone in the world who feels that way about you? If not, now would be an excellent time to work on getting such an ally. Cosmic conditions are ripe for bringing greater levels of assistance and collaboration into your life. And if you already do have confederates of that caliber, I suggest you take this opportunity to deepen your symbiotic connection even further.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “People fall so in love with their pain, they can’t leave it behind,” asserts novelist Chuck Palahniuk. Your assignment, Gemini, is to work your ass off to fall out of love with your pain. As if you were talking to a child, explain to your subconscious mind that the suffering it has gotten so accustomed to has outlived its usefulness. Tell your deep self that you no longer want the ancient ache to be a cornerstone of your identity. To aid the banishment, I recommend that you conduct a ritual of severing. Tie one side of a ribbon to a symbol of your pain and tie the other side around your waist. Then cut the ribbon in half and bury the symbol in the dirt.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Over a hundred countries around the

Jonesin’ Crossword

rob brezsny

CANCER (June 21-July 22): “You

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The saxifrage is a small plant with white flowers. It grows best in subarctic regions and cooler parts of the Northern Hemisphere. The word “saxifrage” is derived from the Latin word saxifraga, whose literal meaning is “stone-breaker.” Indeed, the plant does often appear in the clefts of stones and boulders. In his poem “A Sort of a Song,” William Carlos Williams celebrates its strength: “Saxifrage is my flower that splits the rocks.” I nominate this darling little dynamo to be your metaphorical power object of the week, Virgo. May it inspire you to crack through blocks and barriers with subtle force. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): You’re not being swept along in a flood of meaningless distractions and irrelevant information and trivial wishes, right? I’m hoping that you have a sixth sense about which few stimuli are useful and meaningful to you, and which thousands of stimuli are not. But if you are experiencing a bit of trouble staying well-grounded in the midst of the frenzied babble, now would be a good time to take strenuous action. The universe will conspire to help you become extra stable and secure if you resolve to eliminate as much nonsense from your life as you can.

matt jones

“You Had to Be There” --and there you is.

Across 1 Scraps 8 Annoy 11 Greek letters 14 Perfect example 15 Autumnal chill 16 Bambi’s aunt 17 Keep a distance 20 Gets under control 21 Dispensable candy 22 Off kilter 23 ___ out a living 24 “Pet” that’s really a plant 26 Not one’s best effort, in a sports metaphor 27 Hi-___ monitor 28 With just us, not anyone else 30 Compass dir. 31 Utah city 32 Rocky Balboa opponent Apollo ___ 33 Schoolboy 34 Server of Duff Beer

35 “Watership Down” director Martin 38 Director Gus Van ___ 39 Atlanta health agcy. 42 Malt liquor amount 44 Antipoverty agcy. created by LBJ (hidden in SHOE ORGANIZER) 45 1994 Nobel Peace Prize sharer 46 No voters 47 “Alice’s Restaurant” singer Guthrie 48 “Change the World” singer Clapton 49 Keebler cookie maker 50 Airport runway 51 The right way (for things) 55 Carly ___ Jepsen 56 ___ center 57 Kindle, for one 58 Avg. level 59 Demand 60 Bum out

Down 1 Guinea pigs 2 Passages for drawing smoke 3 Kind of cat or twins 4 Eye problems 5 Bathrooms, for Brits 6 Big bird 7 “Go” preceder 8 Unpleasant way to live 9 Cracker brand 10 Speed meas. in Europe 11 Outgrowth of punk rock 12 Without weapons 13 Agree 18 Drug in a den 19 Bird on a coin 24 Monsieur de Bergerac 25 Broke new ground 26 Artists’ headwear 28 One of Henry VIII’s wives

29 Tea accompaniments 34 “I Try” singer Gray 35 Greets with lots of laughter 36 Circled the sun 37 1991 Wimbledon champ Michael 38 Total mess 39 Act like rust 40 “Coppelia” composer 41 Barrel makers 42 Director of “The Grifters” 43 Open an achievement, e.g. 47 Fragrant oil 49 They’re looking for you? 50 “Shake well,” e.g. 52 Time 53 Diploma alternative 54 Charlemagne’s domain: abbr.

Copyright © 2013 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+ to call. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle No. 0649 • November 14-20, 2013 • The Pulse • 21

On the Beat

alex teach

Home of the Homeless Life on the mean streets with Officer Alex

I had just finished eating something with lamb in it. It was in a bowl, of that I am sure; the bowl contained something with a hint of spice in a thick broth, but the meat cubes…I wasn’t sure of them at all, and little by little I was beginning to realize that the bland little meat cubes were probably lamb, and if there’s one thing I despise in this world, it’s self-righteous smarmy 20-somethings who make themselves feel better by making fun of people who find comfort in religion, so long as it’s Christianity (because making fun of Muslims would be wrong, of course). But a close second? Lamb. “Oh, God,” I mumbled as we cruised along, an unavoidable frown growing ever downward. My partner turned his head towards me but was interrupted by dispatch calling our unit number. “Fox 9?” they inquired. “Gourd head,” I chirped back. It was a missing person call. I was good with that. If it’s a huge deal (someone really old or really young, disabled, unmedi-

cated, a combination thereof), it gets handed over. If it’s minor, we check the area ourselves and take a less dramatic approach. All or nothing, win/win given my condition at the moment. We arrived at a house on 10th Avenue that used to be known for its incest but was now an attempt at a “trendy pickerupper.” (The fact that these two things were indistinguishable to the indigenous peoples of this area was lost on the new formerNorth Chattanooga tenants). “Yes,” she said. “I’d like to report Henry missing.”

Let me clarify. He doesn’t have a house, and he had all his stuff, and he was walking away. So he was moving, right?”

“Henry? Is that your husband or family member?” “No,” she said. “Henry’s a friend. He stays around here.” “I don’t understand. He lives near here?” I said with a slowly tilting head. “No. He’s homeless. I just usually see him about now, and I haven’t seen him since the day before yesterday.” I paused. “He’s homeless, but he’s missing? That’s a tough one, ma’am.” “How so?” she replied. “Because how can you be missing if you weren’t anywhere in the first place?” I probably shouldn’t have done it, but I actually knew of whom she spoke, and knew that she’d been feeding a known stray. Henry is a “confidence man” amongst his ilk, a freeloader and thief when the time is right. He loves his job. And because I love mine, I knew who she was talking about. “I don’t…” I cut her off. “What was he wearing the last time you saw him?” “H’mm…a dark blue coat, kind of dirty, and brown pants.

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T h e y were pretty dirty, too. Oh, and he had his backpack with all his things in it.” “So, he was moving then?” I said. Now she was baffled. “Let me clarify. He doesn’t have a house, and he had all his stuff, and he was walking away. So he was moving, right?” “Are you messing with me?!” she exclaimed. “I’m serious, this isn’t at all like him! This is extremely unprofessional, you know. I can’t believe you’re acting like this! Who’s your super—” and at that she was cut off as my partner came in behind me, stating, “Found ’em.” “What?” the complainant said. “Where?” “He was in your car, ma’am. At the McDonald’s.” “But I don’t understand…” she trailed off, now taking her own turn to tilt her head in confusion. “Exactly, Miss. And I’m not sure I can explain it to you. But I will say that if you don’t give

serious thoughts to your sense of charity towards local predators, the next missing person report may be yours, and we’ll find you at the McDonald’s, too. In the trunk.” I drove it home to make a point, or in her case, a dent. This is the frontier, folks. She was quiet…but I was lucky. That was definitely going to be a complaint. And speaking of complaints, that nasty-ass lamb was working its way into my guts. Have I ever told you how I feel about lamb? When officer Alexander D. Teach is not patrolling our fair city on the heels of the criminal element, he spends his spare time volunteering for the Boehm Birth Defects Center. Follow him on Facebook at www. • November 14-20, 2013 • The Pulse • 23

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The Pulse 10.46 » November 14, 2013  

Chattanooga's Weekly Alternative

The Pulse 10.46 » November 14, 2013  

Chattanooga's Weekly Alternative