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MARCH 16, 2017


Who Was St. Patrick and why do we celebrate his day By Jenn Webster



VOLUME 14, ISSUE 11 MARCH 16, 2017



Walking into the Songbirds museum instantly inserts you into a never-ending story. The art, the history, and the vast memories and stories attached to each guitar is breathtaking.



Much like poetry, art is a way for people to powerfully express themselves, where one brush stroke can say countless words. Art comes in many forms, for poetry is art, and art is poetry.



The second wave of the upcoming Chattanooga Film Festival has been announced and it’s a cavalcade of interesting films accompanied by specials guests of all sorts.



I started writing for The Pulse in 2013. The Dead Testaments were one of the first bands I covered and they instantly became (and remain) one of my favorite bands anywhere.



“Kiss Me, I'm Irish!” The Water of Life. Whiskey. Uisce beatha. Then there’s beoir. Beer, that is. Add a little green food coloring. And of course, I remember some vicious purple bruises from my elementary school days “pinches” because I didn’t wear green.


























Jenn Webster is a dancer and technical writer by trade who has also written for marketing, educational, and consumer publications. She’s an Army veteran and a member of WEAVE: A Conceptual Dance Company.

Adam Beckett is a professional writer from the Metro-Atlanta area. He has been writing professionally for over a decade, and has produced many articles that have been featured on major news networks, online sites, magazines and newspapers.



Songbirds Strikes A Chord Bringing the world to Chattanooga one guitar at a time By Alex Plaumann Pulse contributor



Managing Editor Gary Poole Assistant Editor Brooke Brown Music Editor Marc T. Michael Film Editor John DeVore Contributors Adam Beckett • Rob Brezsny Steven W. Disbrow • Matt Jones Ernie Paik • Rick Pimental-Habib Michael Thomas • Brandon Watson Editorial Interns Addie Whitlow • Alex Plaumann Cartoonists Max Cannon • Rob Rogers Jen Sorenson • Tom Tomorrow


Director of Sales Mike Baskin Account Executives Chee Chee Brown • Brittany Dreon Rick Leavell • Cindee McBride Libby Phillips • John Rodriguez Logan Vandergriff


Offices 1305 Carter St. Chattanooga, TN 37402 Phone 423.265.9494 Website Email THE FINE PRINT: The Pulse is published weekly by Brewer Media and is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on music, the arts, entertainment, culture and local news. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publisher may take more than one copy per weekly issue. The Pulse may be distributed only by authorized distributors. Contents Copyright © 2017 by Brewer Media. All rights reserved.

ALKING INTO THE SONGbirds museum instantly inserts you into a never-ending story. The art, the history, and the vast memories and stories attached to each guitar is breathtaking. The intertwining of art, history, and stories may not be what you expect from a guitar museum, but at Songbirds, it’s truly an enlightening experience for guitar enthusiasts, art lovers, and history buffs. Located in The Chattanooga Choo Choo, this nearly 20-year project has finally come to an end, and the result is quite amazing. When entering the Songbirds Museum, the character of the building really shines through. The museum has beautiful industrial ceilings, and a mysterious rock star ambiance. This is something museum president Johnny Smith said he wanted to keep intact, and was one of the most interesting aspects of the entire project. Smith said, “The process of converting the building was really unique experience, using only Chattanooga vendors, we wanted to keep the character of this historic building.” The Songbirds Museum is currently displaying 551 beautifully crafted guitars. These instruments are pieces of art, and are displayed as such. With large glass cases surrounding the museum, the easy flowing floor plan allows for the viewers to peruse the displays throughout the first room before ending up near the intimate, but professional stage that musicians will be dying to play for years to come. When walking past the stage you enter a small corridor that leads to the green room. The green room is also set up with small displays of various guitars, mostly from the 50’s and 60’s. But then you see it: the vault. From the outside, the vault is alluring and not easy to access. But if you decide to take the all access tour, you will not be


disappointed. Within the vault are some of the rarest, most beautiful guitars in the world. The vault is gorgeous with dim lighting, and contains singular display cases for each guitar with spotlights that hit the instruments just right. With a fresh and woodsy smell, it’s like entering one of the most exclusive cigar rooms in the world, but instead you’re entering a room filled with some of the most valuable and finely crafted guitars ever made. The history within this museum was a common theme throughout the Songbirds Grand Opening event last Thursday. With country music superstar Vince Gill, Songbirds CEO David Davidson, and President Johnny Smith on stage, it was clear the history and art surrounding us was immense. When the panel was asked “Why Chattanooga?” Smith replied without hesitation, “Why not Chattanooga?” Songbirds fit Chattanooga and “Chattanooga needed this,” Smith said. When you consider “all the traveling musicians who came in and out of Chattanooga through the Choo-Choo,” it’s fas-

cinating, and made it clear that Chattanooga was the right place for the Songbirds Museum. When visiting Songbirds, you can both see and feel the vast amount of work that went into making Songbirds a reality. And let me tell you, acquiring these guitars wasn’t easy. When I asked CEO David Davidson the furthest he had to go to get some of these guitars he said, “We go anywhere and everywhere, but the furthest we have gone was Japan.” The history and stories attached to these guitars are endless. Besides the history, Vince Gill had another reason why he wanted to be apart of this unique project. Gill talked about how we always seem to gravitate towards what we are passionate about, and for Gill “its all about searching and finding that instrument that may sound just a little bit different.” Chattanooga is now home to the Songbirds Museum, and Chattanooga residents should be excited about this unique museum and tourist attraction. The Songbirds Museum is one of a kind, and is essentially the hall of fame of guitars.

Consider This with Dr. Rick

EdiToon by Rob Rogers

“See the light in others and treat them as if that’s all you see.” — Dr. Wayne Dyer

Celebrating The Persian New Year In Style New Year’s is arguably one of the most exciting yearly celebrations regardless of your culture. Here in America, New Year’s celebrations only last for 24 hours. However, for people of Iranian/Persian cultures, the New Year’s celebration, Nowruz, lasts for 13 days. Nowruz starts on the first day of spring in order to honor the rebirth of nature; the celebration also consists of cultural symbols of hope for the upcoming year. This year, the Bessie Smith Cultural Center is partnering with Chattanooga-area Persian community members to bring the Nowruz celebration to the scenic city.

The Persian Nowruz celebration will be held at the Bessie Smith Cultural Center this Sunday at 5 p.m. There will be a Persian dinner, consisting of kebabs, rice and other cultural foods. In

addition, the celebration will include dancing and information about Persian and Iranian cultures. Because this is one of the largest events of the year in the Persian culture, cocktail attire is recommended but not required. The celebration will be fun for the whole family and will give all attendees an opportunity to learn more about Middle Eastern cultures and partake in this New Year’s celebration, so if you’re celebrating Nowruz or if you have an appreciation of different cultural celebrations, you definitely want to purchase tickets to Chattanooga’s Nowruz celebration. — Addie Whitlow

In certain regions of South Africa, when someone does something wrong, he is taken to the center of the village and surrounded by his tribe while they speak of all the good he has done. They believe each person is good, yet sometimes we make mistakes, which they see as a cry for help. They unite in this ritual to encourage the person to reconnect with his true nature. The belief is that unity and affirmation have more power to change behavior than shame and punishment. This is known as “Ubuntu”—humanity toward others. This amazing time we live in, when national tensions are high and divisive, it may behoove us to remember that everyone, ourselves included, is motivated by old beliefs, unexamined impulses…and pure closed-mindedness. Consider this: If indigenous tribes understand the power of humanity toward others, surely we can. Can’t we? — Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D.




Where Are All The Aliens? The ongoing search for intelligent (or any) life in the universe

Steven W. Disbrow Pulse columnist


HE PAST FEW YEARS HAVE SEEN an explosion in the number of exoplanets that we’ve discovered. In fact, it seems that almost every star we look at has one or more planets whizzing around it. For those of us of a certain age, it’s hard to believe that before 1995, the mere existence of exoplanets was 100 percent science fiction! Of course, we knew they had to be out there. There are just so many stars. It would be unimaginable that ours was the only planetary system in existence. After all, there’s not anything special about our Solar System; just a bunch of gas and rocks flying around a rather mediocre star out in a nondescript arm of a fairly typical galaxy. We just had to keep looking… Now, with so many confirmed exoplanets out there (more than 3,500 as I write this) and so many stars remaining to be looked at, the question becomes, “Where are the aliens?” I mean, they have to be out there, right? Given the size of the universe, and the number of planets we know are out there, it seems unthinkable that we’re the only intelligent life in the entire universe. This is known as “Fermi’s Paradox.” Named after famed physicist Enrico Fermi, this sums up the current state of the search for extraterrestrial intelligence: The place should be crawling with civilizations, but there don’t seem to be any of them any-

where! Why? Well, there are quite a few hypothetical explanations for this state of affairs. (Hypothetical, because we’ve never actually seen an extraterrestrial civilization in any state, let alone after it collapsed.) So, maybe… We’re the first. That seems unlikely, given the age of the universe. We’re the last. This is a bit more likely, given the age of the universe. But, if that were the case, there should be some residual evidence that they were there at some point. (A really old/advanced civilization would have tried to explore the galaxy and left behind probes that we should have encountered by now.) Advanced civilizations have a tendency to destroy themselves. Depressing, but likely. Our own civilization is only about 10,000 years old (if you round up a bit), and we’ve already got nuclear weapons, rampant Climate Change and only a half-hearted Asteroid Detection network. Add to this the fact that we really seem to enjoy killing each other and it’s not a good bet that we’ll make it to the 20,000-year mark. We’re in a “zoo.” I’m not a fan of this one, but, many theorists think that we’ve not been contacted because the civilizations around us have decided that we’re too young, too dangerous or both. If we survive the next few thousand

years, then maybe they’ll talk to us. The Great Filter. Barring any other explanation, there may be some unknown barrier (a “Great Filter”) that all advanced civilizations must pass through to become stable and long-lasting. Again, since we have no examples to go by, we have no idea what this might be. But, given the silence we hear in the universe, it seems to be pretty effective at its job. (Personally, my favorite explanation for the Great Filter is “Galactus.”) However, there are a couple of recent developments that have given hope to the SETI (Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence) folks. First, is the mystery of “Tabby’s Star” (which I discussed a couple months back). This unusual star is surrounded by something (or somethings) that has been causing the star to dim by an unusual amount over the last 100 years. At this point, they still don’t know what it is, but “Alien Mega-Structure” is still in the running. More recently (literally, last week), a couple of Harvard theo-

rists advanced the idea that Fast Radio Bursts (radio signals from another galaxy, lasting fewer than 5 milliseconds, yet 500 million times more powerful than the output of our sun) were actually being used to power light-sail vehicles across interstellar space! These beams only intersect the Earth by accident, and only for the short time it takes to aim them correctly at the vehicles they are pushing through space. Such insanely powerful beams could easily push a massive ship (containing colonists maybe?) across the void at relativistic speeds. Of course, it’s all hypothetical at this point. But, like exoplanets before, aliens have to be out there, right? For me, at least, the alternative is simply inconceivable. We just have to keep looking, listening, and sifting through the data. Steven W. Disbrow is a programmer who specializes in e-commerce and mobile systems development, an entrepreneur, comicbook nerd, writer, improviser, actor, sometime television personality and parent of two human children.



Something tells us that St. Patrick wans't one to drink green beer and dress like a leprechaun...though one never knows for certain.



“Kiss Me, I'm Irish!” How a fifth-century Catholic saint inspired a most unusual holiday By Jenn Webster Pulse contributor


HE WATER OF LIFE. WHISKEY. Uisce beatha. Then there’s beoir. Beer, that is. Add a little green food coloring. And of course, I remember some vicious purple bruises from my elementary school days “pinches” because I didn’t wear green. Nowadays, random pinching of people will likely earn you a conversation about bullying, or a trip to the human resources office, depending on your age, but people often wear something green on March 17, just in case. Or maybe they just want to be kissed. There’s another St. Patrick’s Day tradition. “Kiss me, I’m Irish.” At my age, I don’t get too many offers, so I figure a swatch of green on my outfit won’t hurt. Pretty please? Add companionship, Irish music and perhaps a jig, and you have a traditional St. Patrick’s Day celebration…which may have little to do with Ireland or St. Patrick. The original St. Patrick was a Christian Briton who was taken as a slave to Ireland, escaped, and later returned to minister to his former oppressors. Like so many holy men and women of ancient and medieval times, he was guided by a dream. It must have been a powerful one, because he studied 15 years before his ordination and return to Ireland. There, he ministered to the local Christian communities and sought to convert those who were still pagan. In Ireland, Patrick used the tried-and-true

technique of co-option to transform native religious practices into Christian ones. For instance, fire was sacred to the Irish—cows were traditionally driven between fires at Beltane to protect them from fairies—and Patrick lit bonfires in his Easter celebrations. According to one source, he enraged the king at Tara by lighting a competing Easter fire just as the court was celebrating the return of summer. Traditionally, all fires were put out, only to be relit from the royal fire, so Patrick was co-opting not just the symbol, but the royal prerogative. St. Patrick’s holiday, March 17, reflects the supposed date of his death in 460 A.D. His feast was first celebrated in the ninth or tenth century, but the holiday people associate with him in popular

imagination—wearing green, parading and carousing—originated largely in the United States. In 1762, the world’s first St. Patrick’s Day parade was held in New York City. Since St. Patrick’s Day takes place during Lent, the celebration can be a welcome release for Catholics who are fasting or abstaining. Traditionally, a bundle of shamrock (seamair óg, or “young clover”) was worn throughout the day. In the evening, the wearer would put the shamrock leaves into a glass of alcohol and, when the glass was drained, toss the leaves over his or her shoulder for good luck, according to the Irish Examiner. In Chattanooga, St. Patrick’s Day is notable for the “St. Patrick’s Day Flood” on 1973, in continued on page 11 CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MARCH 16, 2017 • THE PULSE • 9



which three days of rain totaling more than nine inches caused Chattanooga Creek and South Chickamauga Creek to overflow. The St. Chatty’s Day Parade was established in 2014 and is still going strong. And of course, plenty of neighborhood pubs and clubs host parties, too. RAISE A GLASS TO A FAMILY ST. PATRICK’S DAY When you ask Chattanoogans about St. Patrick’s Day, many people describe a family-oriented holiday (and what celebration isn’t, around here)? Most plans are very modest—wearing a wee bit of green and indulging in a little teasing. One Catholic friend explained how much the feast resonated with her Irish heritage, complementing her belief in fairies and saints. Like many people I spoke with, she doesn’t drink or attend

“I guess our traditions regarding St. Patrick’s Day are more like philosophies. The minute our customers walk through our door, they’re family.” parades on the date…a swatch of green is enough. If you do go out, you’re likely to find home-style festivities. “Our St. Patrick’s Day celebration is one of bringing together family and friends,” says Sandy Hunt of Moccasin Bend Brewing Company. “We celebrate the ‘Americanized’ version of St. Patrick’s Day with corned beef and cabbage, green shamrocks and lots of

beer (green is optional) while at the same time we strive to pay homage to the traditional Irish pub where generations of families can meet and feel right at home. Our focus on providing a community meeting place for friends and families means we are keeping the spirit of St. Patrick’s Day with us all year long.” What about St. Patrick’s as a family holiday, I ask. Does your

personal holiday influence how you celebrate it at your business? In fact, Sandy tells me, there’s no separating them. “Our personal lives are so entwined with the business, it’s hard to separate the personal traditions from the professional ones,” she says. “I guess our traditions regarding St. Patrick’s Day are more like philosophies. The minute our customers walk through our door, they’re family.” SWINGIN’ ON A STAR Here in southeast Tennessee, we love our old-fashioned square dances and clogging. If you’ve ever stepped to a caller while a fiddle kept the tempo quick and rollicking, you’ve participated in a tradition whose roots trail from Appalachia back to Scotland and continued on page 12



Ireland. Trust Chattanoogans to do things their own way. While Irish dance includes step dance (picture Riverdance, with the rigid upper bodies and quickly jigging feet) and set dancing (a relative of our square dance, with couples switching up partners), southeast Tennessee is bouncing with social dances this week. At Blissful Wellness on Vance Road, new to expert dancers will gather on March 17 for St. Patty’s Swing Dance, a healthy alternative to bar-hopping. “Our Swing Dance Nights were born out of Blissful Wellness and Nutrition World’s goal of bringing the community of Chattanooga together in a healthier way,” says Maggie Bates-Bailey of Blissful Wellness. “We try to accomplish 12 • THE PULSE • MARCH 16, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

that through education, nutrition and movement.” Just one of a series of themed dances, St. Patty’s Swing Dance will be hosted by Holli Hutson, a well-known Chattanooga teacher of dance and Pilates. The event will feature something for everyone, Maggie says. People who want an especially healthy St. Patrick’s evening can even come early for yoga class. “We love [Holli] and her love of all things dance,” Maggie says. “We start with a flowing yoga class followed by a sampling of kombucha [fermented tea] made locally by Blue Indian Kombucha sold right upstairs at Nutrition World. Sampling of the kombucha will be offered after the hour class. “Then at 7 p.m. our swing dance social will begin. We will offer a 45


“The original ‘kiss’ wasn’t something exchanged you with Irish people exactly…instead, you kiss a big lump of bluestone rock, the Blarney Stone.” to 60 minute class and follow it up with light refreshments and practice time or simply talking about life with some new friends. [St. Patrick’s Day] is traditionally associated with pub crawls and long nights of drinking green drinks. Come and have a fun healthy night out and still leave time for all of Chattanooga’s evening events this great town offers.” Maggie will be playing Irish music for the dance—I can’t wait to find out what Irish swing music sounds like. She’ll be sharing her favorite Irish proverbs, too. Like many other Chattanoogans, Maggie has Irish roots. “My grandmother came over on a boat with the maiden name of Eileen Fury,” Maggie says. “She passed away this last year, so I am dedicating this class to her.” IRISH EMBRACES? So where did “Kiss me, I’m Irish” come from? Well, the original “kiss” wasn’t something exchanged you with Irish people exactly…instead, you kiss a big lump of bluestone rock, the Blarney Stone. Set into Blarney Castle in County Cork, the Blarney Stone supposedly bestows the gift of rhetorical prowess. Kiss the stone, and you can persuade anyone of anything. It’s a bit of a trick. You have to lean in, upside down and backwards, with someone holding on to keep you from

falling. If you’re not Irish, never fear. You may be tied to the Blarney stone through Scots ancestors. The stone is supposed to have been given to King Cormac McCarthy, who once lived in Blarney Castle, by Robert the Bruce of Scotland in return for military aid. While the stone has been part of the castle since the 14th century, it was only as recently Queen Elizabeth I’s reign that the world “Blarney” became associated with a silver tongue. The Irish king Dermot McCarthy had promised her the castle, but he kept putting off the surrender with one excuse after another. “More Blarney talk!” she exclaimed in exasperation. And as for the kissing, apparently another king saved a fairy or witch-woman from drowning, and she granted his castle, the Blarney stone in particular, with the gift of conveying persuasiveness with a kiss. Speaking of fairies, I’ve never been there, but the Blarney Castle website advertises a rock garden with fairy glades, wooded trails and faces in the stones. Sounds a lot like Rock City to me (where they also hold a Shamrock City series of events). I might check it out. Or then again, I might stay home, add some green food coloring to my eggs and ham, and kiss a pretty Cailín (Irish maiden). CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MARCH 16, 2017 • THE PULSE • 13


(Re)Inventing Art At The Hunter Museum New exhibit showcases young emerging artists

Focus On Fashion Chattanooga Style The Dwell Hotel will be hosting an intimate Regina James Fashion showcase this Sunday with a runway show previewing the 2017 Spring/Summer collection by designer Veatrice Conley. The Respect the Runway: A Showcase of Regina James Fashion Show will feature local models showing off around 16 to 20 vibrant and chic looks. This show will be a fun yet sophisticated afternoon out for anyone interested in seeing a preview of the Nashville native’s chic style. For Conley, “Every design represents who I am and how I want to be remembered.” After beginning her design career five years ago, Conley knew she wanted to be an inspiration for all the dreamers and doers out there. There will be a runway introduction by Shay McCowan, the co-founder of 364 Enterprise who helps to support the local fashion community in a variety of ways. After the show, there will be a Q&A session with designer Conley as well as an opportunity for anyone interested in purchasing some of the custom pieces from the runway show. Doors open at 3 p.m. with a champagne mixer, and the runway show will start at exactly 3:30 p.m. The Respect the Runway fashion shows attire is cocktail chic. — Alex Plaumann Regina James Spring Fashion Showcase Sunday, 3 p.m. The Dwell Hotel 120 E. 10th Street (423) 267-7866 14 • THE PULSE • MARCH 16, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

By Adam Beckett Pulse contributor


UCH LIKE POETRY, ART IS A WAY for people to powerfully express themselves, where one brush stroke can say countless words. Art comes in many forms, for poetry is art, and art is poetry. Art can also be music, painting, drawing, photography, printmaking, etching, calligraphy, creating anything, cooking, sculpting, computer or video art, architecture, and list goes on. The poetic weight that pours from all forms of it is unmeasurable. Artwork can often be viewed as an extension of one’s emotions or feelings. It is a beautiful thing for people to create physical relics of their inner smiles, cries, and everything in between. For an artist to take their heart and create with such raw power that a piece of them goes into it; nostalgia will forever bind those associated feelings to whoever knows of the weight, especially the artist. Demonstrating the sublime rawness of poetic artwork is soon to be presented by, and displayed at the Hunter Museum of Arts through the 15th Annual Juried (Re)Invention Exhibition by the John

F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts, which will be on view at the museum between March 17th and May 21st. The program is part of the VSA Emerging Young Artists Program, a Jean Kennedy Smith Arts and Disability Program. The exhibition is a collection of art from fifteen emerging young artists from across the United States who are living with disabilities. The artists involved range between the ages of 16 and 25 years old. The national art competition and exhibition gives artists with disabilities a platform and possibility to display their artwork in venues throughout the country. A lengthy collaboration with the Volkswagen Group of America has helped the program to be an ongoing success. According to the program “Rather than allowing their disabilities to label them, the artists in this exhibit produce work that embodies the theme of re-invention, re-definition, and re-making. Each artist uses art to consider such identity based topics as fragility, intimacy, isolation, race, gender, and the body.” Essentially these young artists are pouring their heart and soul into their work in order for people


“For these artists to be able to express this poetic component of themselves on a national level allows them to genuinely make an impact towards their cause.” to expand understanding of disabilities, and to enrich a sense of encompassment and commonage. “The artists in this exhibition explore what it means to have a disability and yet resist being defined solely by it. Through their art making, they question common societal perceptions and expectations, as well as discover a profound sense of self”. This Thursday at 6 p.m., a day before the viewing of the exhibit commences, the Hunter Museum will feature a talk by the 2016 Lawrence College graduate, and California based visiting artist Kate Pincus-Whitney, whose art will be displayed in the (Re)Invention exhibit. PincusWhitney has experienced the realm of dyslexia and stereo blindness. Into her art, she imple-

mented pieces of her disability by including female forms, table scenes, food, patterns, color, as well as abstract and misspelled words. “She aims to synthesize social and political themes of identity with visual memory and personal histories. She sees herself as an artist anthropologist”. She will have some incredible insight and the artistic minded community of Chattanooga should certainly bind together to listen to her words. For these artists to be able to express this poetic component of themselves on a national level allows them to genuinely make an impact towards their cause. These young artists have an outlet that allows them to create the weight of verisimilitude, a force so heavy that it will actualize their purpose; the (Re)Invention exhibit enables them to expose a light to people that might would not otherwise have the opportunity to come face to face with such a dazzling force.

One example of the potential power of this exhibit and the work of these rising young artists, Frida Kahlo is a deceased and world famous disabled artist that suffered from disabilities for much of her life. As a result of her disabilities she would turn to art as an outlet for her emotional and physical distress. Some of her most famous pieces depicted her injuries and life experiences. She is remembered by her self-portraits, ability to artistically portray her pain and passion, and usage of bold and vibrant colors. Her paintings are valuable pieces of history and artwork. These young men and women from around America can carry on Kahlo’s flame by displaying and continuing to make artwork that comes from their feelings, emotions, and guts. Perhaps their artwork will also withstand the test of time. When people poetically create art with thunder and the desire to open eyes to make a difference, is when truly passionate artwork is created and where pieces of history are created. This will be a glorious exhibit to experience, Chattanooga.

THU3.16 Irish Courage “The Playboy of the Western World”

Get immersed with live Irish song and dance. 7:30 p.m. Mars Theatre District 117 N. Chattanooga St. (706) 621-2870

FRI3.17 Irish Soles

What better way to celebrate Saint Patrick's Day than runningwalking with the Irish. 5:30 p.m. Chattanooga Brewing Co. 1804 Chestnut St. (423) 624-4618

SAT3.18 St. Chatty's Day Parade

A grand Irish parade from downtown to the Northshore to benefit Kids on the Block. Noon Downtown Chattanooga (423) 757-5259



PSC Presents Steven Gustafson

THURSDAY3.16 Ooltewah Farmers Market 3 p.m. Ooltewah Nursery 5829 Main St. (423) 238-9775 Signal Mountain Farmers Market 4 p.m. Pruett’s Market 1210 Taft Hwy. (423) 902-8023 From My Perspective: An Exhibition for All Artists 6 p.m. Trousdale School 3171 Hewitt St. (423) 479-7130 Re-Inventions: Exhibit Opening and Artists Talks 6 p.m. The Hunter Museum of American Art 10 Bluff View Ave. (423) 267-0968 Open Figure Drawing Studio 6 p.m. Townsend Atelier 301 E. 11th St. (423) 266-2712 PSC Presents Steven Gustafson 7 p.m. St. John’s United Methodist Church 3921 Murray Hills Dr. (423) 344-5643

16 • THE PULSE • MARCH 16, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM Irish Courage “The Playboy of the Western World” 7:30 p.m. Mars Theatre District 117 N. Chattanooga St. (706) 621-2870 Cee-Jay Jones 7:30 p.m. The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233

FRIDAY3.17 Chattanooga Market at Erlanger 10:30 a.m. Erlanger Hospital Medical Mall 975 E. 3rd St.

Annual Swing for Signal Centers Gold Tournament 1 p.m. Windstone Golf Club 9230 Windstone Dr. (423) 313-3257 Irish Soles 5:30 p.m. Chattanooga Brewing Company 1804 Chestnut St. (423) 624-4618 1st Annual St. Patty’s Day Ball for Crown CARES 7 p.m. Walker Pavilion 150 River St. (423) 451-7376 Irish Courage “The Playboy of the Western World” 7:30 p.m. Mars Theatre District

ENTERTAINMENT SPOTLIGHT One of the hottest, freshest comics to hit the comedy scene. His stage presence, quick wit, high energy and rapid fire delivery keeps his audiences laughing non-stop. Cee-Jay Jones The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233

117 N. Chattanooga St. (706) 621-2870 Cee-Jay Jones 7:30, 9:45 p.m. The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 Ruby Falls Lantern Tours 8:30 p.m. Ruby Falls 1720 S. Scenic Hwy. (423) 800-0566

SATURDAY3.18 Raccoon Mountain Marathon 7:30 a.m. Raccoon Mountain 319 W. Hills Rd. (423) 821-9403 Shamrock City 8:30 a.m. Rock City 1400 Patten Rd. (706) 820-2531 Wild Ones Annual Plant Expo 8:30 a.m. UTC University Center 615 Mccallie Ave. (423) 425-4455 Dash for DS 8:45 a.m. Tennessee Riverpark 4301 Amnicola Hwy. dash4ds.redpodium. com/dash-for-ds St. Alban’s Hixson Market


Chattanooga River Market 9:30 a.m. St. Alban’s Episcopal Church 7514 Hixson Pike (423) 842-6303 Free Health Fair 10 a.m. Volkswagen Conference Center 8001 Volkswagen Dr. (615) 208-4417 Northside Farmers Market 10 a.m. Northside Presbyterian Church 923 Mississippi Ave. (423) 266-7497 Chattanooga River Market Opening Day 10 a.m. Tennessee Aquarium Plaza 1 Broad St. (423) 648-2496 Chattanooga River Market Yoga 10 a.m. Tennessee Aquarium Plaza 1 Broad St. (423) 648-2496 Joys of Gardening: Part 2 10 a.m. Crabtree Farms of Chattanooga 1000 E. 30th St. (423) 493-9155 Chickamauga Turn 10 a.m. Tennessee Valley Railroad 4119 Cromwell Rd. (423) 894-8028 Brainerd Farmers Market 11 a.m. Grace Episcopal Church

20 Belvoir Ave. (404) 245-3682 St. Chatty's Day Parade Noon Downtown Chattanooga (423) 757-5259 Being Mortal: Film Screening & Discussion 1 p.m. Chattanooga Public Library Downtown 1001 Broad St. (662) 791-1800 Chattanooga Raqs Bellydance Show 7:30 p.m. Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 987-1067 Irish Courage “The Playboy of the Western World” 7:30 p.m. Mars Theatre District 117 N. Chattanooga St. (706) 621-2870 Cee-Jay Jones 7:30, 9:45 p.m. The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 Disrupters Series: Women in Leadership 8 p.m. The Camp House 149 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 702-8081 Ruby Falls Lantern Tours 8:30 p.m. Ruby Falls

1720 S. Scenic Hwy. (423) 800-0566

SUNDAY3.19 Extended Cavern Experience 8 a.m. Ruby Falls 1720 S. Scenic Hwy. (423) 800-0566 Shamrock City 8:30 a.m. Rock City 1400 Patten Rd. (706) 820-2531 Yoga and Beyond: March Session Yin Yoga and Spring Wellness 10:30 a.m. Crabtree Farms of Chattanooga 1000 E. 30th St. (423) 493-9155 Gospel Sunday Brunch 1:30 p.m. Jazzanooga Arts Space 431 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 402-0452 Stories and Visions 2 p.m. The Hunter Museum of American Art 10 Bluff View Ave. (423) 267-0968 Respect the Runway: A Showcase of Regina James Fashion 3 p.m.

The Dwell Hotel 120 E. 10th St. (423) 267-7866 Chattanooga Persian Nowruz (New Year) Party 5 p.m. Bessie Smith Cultural Center 200 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 870-3713 Voluptuous Belle Plus Size Pageant 5 p.m. Chattanooga Convention Center 1 Carter Plz. (423) 756-0001 Irish Courage “The Playboy of the Western World” 7:30 p.m. Mars Theatre District 117 N. Chattanooga St. (706) 621-2870 Cee-Jay Jones 7:30 p.m. The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 Ruby Falls Lantern Tours 8:30 p.m. Ruby Falls 1720 S. Scenic Hwy. (423) 800-0566

MONDAY3.20 TechTown Spring Break STEAM Week 9 a.m. CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MARCH 16, 2017 • THE PULSE • 17


Middle East Dance TechTown 325 Market St. (423) 505-9836 Home School Day 2017- Spring Fling 10 a.m. Reflection Riding Arboretum & Nature Center 400 Garden Rd. (423) 832-1160 Red Bank Farmers Market 3 p.m. Red Bank United Methodist 3800 Dayton Blvd. (423) 838-9804

TUESDAY3.21 Tuesday Fun Lab with A.I.R Labs 8:45 a.m. A.I.R. Labs 2601 Broad St. (423) 380-8089 TechTown Spring Break STEAM Week 9 a.m. TechTown 325 Market St. (423) 505-9836 Drawing Essentials 9 a.m. Townsend Atelier 301 E. 11th St. (423) 266-2712 Detroit Ballroom Dance Class 6 p.m. Bessie Smith Cultural Center 200 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-8658

18 • THE PULSE • MARCH 16, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM Tuesday Night Chess Club 6 p.m. Downtown Library 1001 Broad St. (423) 643-7700

WEDNESDAY3.22 TechTown Spring Break STEAM Week 9 a.m. TechTown 325 Market St. (423) 505-9836 Middle East Dance 10:30 a.m. Jewish Cultural Center 5461 North Terrace (423) 493-0270 Chattanooga Market at Erlanger East 10:30 a.m. Erlanger East Hospital 1751 Gunbarrel Rd. (423) 648-2496 Main Street Market 4 p.m. 325 E. Main St. Immigration Law: How Did We Get Here? 6 p.m. Amani Chattanooga 420 S. Willow St. (423) 531-6496 Map these locations on chattanoogapulse. com. Send event listings at least 10 days in advance to:


courtesy of

The Chattanooga Pulse



courtesy of

The Chattanooga Pulse

BREWER MEDIA GROUP President Jim Brewer II

EDITORIAL Managing Editor Gary Poole Assistant Editor Brooke Dorn Contributors Michael Thomas Alex Plaumann Addie Whitfield Cover Illustration BSG Studio

ADVERTISING Director of Sales Mike Baskin Account Executives Chee Chee Brown • Brittany Dreon Rick Leavell • Cindee McBride Libby Phillips • John Rodriguez Logan Vandergriff

CONTACT Offices 1305 Carter St. Chattanooga, TN 37402 Phone 423.265.9494 Fax 423.266.2335 Website Email THE FINE PRINT Chattanooga Drink is published biannually by The Pulse and Brewer Media. Chattanooga Drink is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. Chattanooga Drink is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publishers may take more than one copy per weekly issue, please. © 2017 Brewer Media


Inside This Issue Chattanooga Billiards Club .................. Matilda Midnight .................................. Southern Burger Co. ............................. Fireside Grille.........................................

23 24 25 26

Bar & Nightclub Directory ................... Brewhaus ................................................ The Casual Pint ..................................... New Amsterdam Vodka .......................

27 34 35 36




Chattanooga Billiards Club F

or the past 35 years, one of the most popular places in downtown Chattanooga has been the Chattanooga Billiards Club, the city’s oldest original location sports bar. Opened in 1982 on Cherry Street, CBC Downtown has long offered the best in food and spirits along with pool tables and dart leagues. Featuring fun, food, and spirits seven days a week, they are conveniently located only minutes from all local area attractions and hotels. And they now offer a smoke-free dining room on the first floor serving lunch and dinner daily (with some very tasty daily lunch specials). And let’s not forget that CBC is home to Chattanooga’s best bartender, the one and only Tommy Stanley. But wait, there’s more. A decade after the downtown location opened, Chattanooga Billiards Club opened a second, much larger location. Tucked in just off of Shallowford Road and Lee Highway on Jordan Drive just four blocks west of I-75 at Exit 5, it is known not only as a place for billiards, darts and good food, but also as a unique location for banquet and conference functions such as business meetings, receptions, reunions or themed events. CBC East features twenty professional Brunswick and Dia-

mond pool tables and a large dart room, along with the same great food and spirits. And both locations cater to daytime and nighttime patrons, staying open to 3 a.m. nightly. And while we could go on and on about the great food, drinks, pool tables and dart boards, CBC East has now opened the city’s newest “beercaid”. The “I’m Game” room combines ‘80s style arcade games, pinball, skee-ball and foosball along with modern X-Box and PlayStation games. Located inside the former Tropicana Room at CBC East, “I’m

Game” is open from 5 p.m. to 3 a.m. Tuesday through Sunday, with private and corporate parties on Mondays. All the games use tokens, with just one token needed for most games up to four tokens for the newest, state-of-the-art pinball machines which you have to see to believe. Food, spirits, pool, darts, and now a huge room filled with classic and modern games—what more can you ask for when looking for a great night of entertainment? Come see what CBC has been the gold standard in Chattanooga for decades.

The Scoop Chattanooga's destination for biliards, darts, games, spirits, great food and fun.

Chattanooga Billiards Club Downtown 725 Cherry St. (423) 267-7740 East Brainerd 110 Jordan Dr. (423) 499-3883



Matilda Midnight


f you’re looking to spend a night out on the town, enjoying fine dining and unique drinks, look no further than The Dwell Hotel. Inside, you’ll find not only a hotel, but also the recently-revamped restaurant Terra Mae and the eclectically-styled cocktail bar Matilda Midnight, which has undergone some substantial menu additions. Before this month, you could only order tapas and small plates to dine on at Matilda Midnight; now, however, the bar has started serving full plates for their lunch menu. They’ve also revitalized their drink menu to include an allnew list of cocktails boasting extended ingredients, according to Melanie Novack, Marketing Manager at The Dwell Hotel. Some of the drinks new to Matilda Midnight include The Empress (fresh banana vodka, orgeat, and black walnut bitters) and The Moon (Sandeman sherry, muddled blueberry, sweet vermouth, and Campari), among other extravagant choices. Lunch options include the Falafel Sandwich, the Dwell


Salad and Abodo Chicken, to name a few. In addition to the menu changes at Matilda Midnight, there’s also been a newly-renovated space for patrons to socialize and relax in: The Rainbow Room. “We created [the Rainbow Room] to be like a cocktail lounge before you go eat at Terra Mae. We have this new menu that is specifically for the Rainbow Room, and it will have cocktails, beer and tapas,” explained Novack. The space for the Rainbow Room formerly consisted of tables for regular dining, but it’s since been turned into an upbeat, fun and colorful area with couches and chairs to chill in and enjoy your drinks or tapas before venturing to Terra Mae. These new changes at The Dwell Hotel give you the perfect opportunity to come in early for dinner at Terra Mae, order a few drinks and relax in the Rainbow Room before dining and then spend your evening under the stars, sampling some of the delicious new cocktails at Matilda Midnight.


Southern Burger Co. S

tarting out as a local Chattanooga food truck in 2011, Southern Burger Co. has transformed into a food service powerhouse. With its restaurant location stationed in Ooltewah, just minutes from downtown Chattanooga, Southern Burger Co. has become a local staple. The company strives to consistently provide its patrons with delicious food, top class service, and a warm inviting environment for family and friends alike. Taking great pride in the quality of their food, Southern Burger Co. utilizes only the freshest ingredients. They grind their own beef,

cut their own fries, and make all of their sauces in house. What they do not make in house, they use locally sourced goods such as buns from local Nieldov’s Breadworks. Outside of their phenomenal food, environment, and service, Southern Burger Co. hosts weekly events such as College Night on Wednesday and Thursday Pint Night; giving it that social aspect that is often craved by restaurant patrons. They do a fantastic job of getting people in the door, and once inside they are provided with a great experience. The food choices are unmatched. They have all of the fixins’ one

could want for a burger or chicken sandwich. They even offer lean meat bison, and turkey choices for the health minded, and an eggplant option for the vegan munchers; but the all-star selections lie in the traditional burger choices. The stand-out burgers are the Chorizo, Raleigh, and Big & Spicy Burgers. The stand out chicken sandwiches are the Nashville Hot Chicken and the Chicken Philly.

It is often hard to pick, so several visits are the only way to truly experience this outside of the box establishment. With so many cookie cutter restaurants flooding the eatery market, it is often hard to find places that break the mold. Southern Burger Co. has no idea what a mold even is, so it is a safe location for foodies that are looking for great food, and a fresh take on eating out.



Fireside Grille W

hen it comes to Fireside Grille; it’s all about the smoke. At Fireside, they smoke their own barbeque, including pork, brisket, ribs, wings, and even bologna. The juicy, smoky, and tender barbeque from Fireside Grille is sure to make any barbeque lover a repeat customer. And it’s not just the barbecue that keeps customers coming back. High quality steaks and tasty seafood dishes have made Fireside Grille a local favorite for well over a decade. Located on Cummings Highway in Lookout Valley, Fireside Grille was recently taken over by new owners, Gene Cowden (GeneO) and Mike Chapman (Chappy) this

past September. With tons of experience both bartending and managing restaurants, you can tell the new owners know what they’re doing. Gene-O and Chappy, along with their stellar kitchen staff, servers and bartenders, are sure to make your dining and drinking experience both fun and satisfying. One of the best things about Fireside is the variety. Your drink options are endless, with a full service bar that has a large selection of liquor, domestic and imported beer, and a few options on tap. Fireside Grille also has a lot of very diverse food options that include steak, seafood, barbeque, burgers, and salads.


Basically, there is something here for even the pickiest of eaters. Some of Fireside Grille’s specialties are their flat iron steak, grouper basket, smoked buffalo wings, and their daily “meat and three” lunch specials. Fireside Grille isn’t just a place for good food and drinks, but it’s a place to have a heck of a time with old and new friends. You can always count on

some killer karaoke nights during the week, and some live music on Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday nights. Fireside Grille is open Monday through Thursday from 11 a.m. to 10 p.m. and Friday and Saturday from 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. At Fireside Grille you can always expect consistent food, weekly drink and food specials, and a large variety of liquor and beer.

Chattanooga Spring 2017 Bar & Nightclub Directory 1885 Grill 3914 St. Elmo Ave. (423) 485-3050 212 Market Restaurant 212 Market St. (423) 265-1212 3rd Deck Burger Bar 201 Riverfront Pkwy. (423) 266-4488 Abuelo’s 2102 Hamilton Place Blvd. (423) 855-7400 Acropolis Mediterranean Grill 2213 Hamilton Place Blvd. (423) 899-5341 AGM Restaurant & Lounge 1622 Dodds Ave. (423) 508-8107 Alan Gold’s Discotheque 1100 McCallie Ave. (423) 629-8080 Alleia 25 E. Main St. (423) 305-6990 American Wings 4011 Brainerd Rd. (423) 475-6212 Amigo Mexican Restaurant 5794 Brainerd Rd.

We strive to make our listings accurate, but things change. We recommend you call in advance or visit websites before visiting any restaurant. For updates and special deals, please visit

(423) 499-5435 5450 Hwy. 153 (423) 875-8049 1906 Dayton Blvd. (423) 870-9928 3805 Ringgold Rd. (423) 624-4345 6701 Hwy. 58 (423) 710-8970 Applebee’s 5606 Brainerd Rd. (423) 553-9203 401 Market St. (423) 826-4996 356 Northgate Mall Dr. (423) 875-8353 2342 Shallowford Village Rd. (423) 499-1999 Aretha Frankensteins 518 Tremont St. (423) 265-7685 Back Inn Café 412 E. 2nd St. (423) 265-5033 Bar Louie 2100 Hamilton Place Blvd. (423) 855-4155 Beast + Barrel 16 Frazier Ave. (423) 805-4599 Beef O’Brady’s 5958 Snow Hill Rd. #100 (423) 910-0261 Big Chill & Grill 103 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 267-2445 Big Don’s Bar & Karaoke 306 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 755-0041 Big River Grille 222 Broad St. (423) 267-2739 2020 Hamilton Place Blvd. (423) 553-7723 Bluewater Grille 224 Broad St. (423) 266-4200 Boathouse Rotisserie & Raw Bar 1459 Riverside Dr. (423) 622-0122

Boccaccia Restaurant 3077 S. Broad St. (423) 266-2930 Bonefish Grill 2115 Gunbarrel Rd. (423) 892-3175 Bourbon Street Music Bar 2000 E. 23rd St. (423) 475-5118 Brewhaus 224 Frazier Ave. (423) 531-8490 Bud’s Sports Bar 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878 Buffalo Wild Wings 120 Market St. (423) 634-0468 5744 Hwy. 153 (423) 877-3338 Cancun Restaurant 1809 Broad St. (423) 266-1461 Carrabba’s Italian Grill 2040 Hamilton Place Blvd. (423) 894-9970 Charlie’s Restaurant & Lounge 8504 Dayton Pike (423) 842-9744 Chattanooga Billiards Club 725 Cherry St. (423) 267-7740

THE PULSE • SRPING DRINK GUIDE • MARCH 16, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • 27 Chattanooga Billiards Club East 110 Jordan Dr. (423) 499-3883 Chattanooga Brewing Company 1804 Chestnut St. (423) 702-9958 Chili’s 408 Market St. (423) 265-1511, 5637 Brainerd Rd. (423) 855-0376 1921 Gunbarrel Rd. (423) 892-6319 123 Northgate Mall Dr. (423) 877-4344 Christy’s Sports Bar 3469 Brainerd Rd. (423) 702-8137 Clyde’s On Main 122 W. Main St. (423) 362-8335 Community Pie 850 Market St. (423) 486-1743 Conga Latin Food 26 E. Main St.

(423) 201-4806 Den Sports Bar & Lounge 1200 E. 23rd St. (423) 475-6007 Diamond Billiard Club 3600 Hixson Pike (423) 877-5882 Diamonds & Lace Showbar (Babes Sports Bar) 115 Honest St. (423) 855-1893 Dos Amigos 3208 Amnicola Hwy. (423) 495-1802 Easy Bistro 203 Broad St. (423) 266-1121 El Meson 2204 Hamilton Pl. Blvd. (423) 894-8726 248 Northgate Park (423) 710-1201 Eleven and H20 Bar DoubleTree Hotel 407 Chestnut St. (423) 756-5150 Feed Table & Tavern 201 W. Main St. (423)708-8500

Firebirds Wood Fired Grill 2107 Gunbarrel Rd. (423) 308-1090 Fireside Grille 3018 Cummings Hwy. (423) 821-9898 Five Bar 200 Manufacturer’s Rd. (423) 777-4120 Flying Squirrel Bar 55 Johnson St. (423) 602-5980 Frothy Monkey 1400 Market St. (423) 680-6343 Fuji Japanese Steak & Sushi 2207 Overnite Dr. (423) 892-2899 5437 Hwy. 153 (423) 531-3183 Full Moon American Burger & Bar 61 N. Market St. (423) 521-6666 Gail’s 2555 Harrison Pike


(423) 698-4123 Georgia Winery 6469 Battlefield Pkwy. Ringgold, Ga. (706) 937-9463 Good Dog 34 Frazier Ave. (423) 475-6175 Hair of the Dog Pub 334 Market St. (423) 265-4615 Harley House 3715 Rossville Blvd. (423) 867-7795 Heaven & Ale 304 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 602-8286, 9431 Cambridge Square Ln., Suite 101 Ooltewah, TN Hennen’s Restaurant 193 Chestnut St. (423) 634-5160 Hooters 5912 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-8668 Ichiban Japanese Steakhouse & Sushi Bar

5621 Brainerd Rd. (423) 892-0404 5035 Hixson Pike (423) 875-0473 5425 Hwy. 153 (423) 875-0404 IL Primo 1100 Hixson Pike (423) 602-5555 I'm Game 110 Jordan Dr. (423) 499-3883 Images Showbar 6005 Lee Hwy. (423) 855-8210 J. Alexander’s 2215 Hamilton Pl. Blvd. (423) 855-5559 J & J Lounge 2208 Glass St. (423) 622-3579 JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 362-5695 Jay’s Bar 1914 Wilder St. (423) 710-2045 Jefferson’s

618 Georgia Ave. (423) 710-1560 jeffersonsrestaurant. com Jimmy D’s Sports Bar & Grill 3901 Rossville Blvd. (423) 867-2624 Kanpai of Tokyo 2200 Hamilton Pl. Blvd. (423) 800-8193 La Altena 314 W. Main St. (423) 266-7595 615 Commercial Ln. (423) 877-1447 8644 E. Brainerd Rd. (423) 893-9047 La Fiesta Mexican Grill 8523 Hixson Pike (423) 843-1149 Lakeshore Grille 5600 Lake Resort Terrace (423) 710-2057 Lamar’s Restaurant 1018 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-0988 Las Margaritas 1101 Hixson Pike (423) 756-3332 4604 Skyview Dr. (423) 892-3065 3100 Cummings Hwy. (423) 825-0304 7015 Shallowford Rd. (423) 553-8686 Lawrence’s Lounge 1201 E. 37th St. (423) 867-0079 Leapin’ Leprechaun 101 Market St. (423) 777-9097

Local 191 191 Chestnut St. (423) 648-6767 Logan’s Roadhouse 2119 Gunbarrel Rd. (423) 499-4339 3592 Cummings Hwy. (423) 821-2948 504 Northgate Mall Dr. (423) 875-4443 Lookout Winery 11848 Highway 41, Guild, Tn. (727) 499-8974 Lupi’s Pizza Pies 406-A Broad St. (423) 266-5874 2382 N. Ocoee St. (423) 476-9464 5504 Hixson Pike (423) 847-3700 1414 Jenkins Rd. (423) 855-4104 9453 Bradmore Ln. (423) 602-7499 Maggie G’s 400 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 757-7722 Marsha’s Backstreet Café 5032 Brainerd Rd. (423) 485-7911 Mary’s Lounge 2125 McCallie Ave. (423) 493-0246 Matilda Midnight 120 E. 10th St. (423) 267-7866 Mayo’s Restaurant & Lounge 3820 Brainerd Rd. (423) 624-0034

McHale’s Brew House 724 Ashland Terrace (423) 877-2124 Mellow Mushroom 205 Broad St. (423) 266-5564 2318 Lifestyle Way (423) 468-3737 Memo’s 430 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 267-7283 Mexiville 809 Market St. (423) 805-7444 Mexi-Wing VII 5773 Brainerd Rd. (423) 634-8899 Mi Casa Mexican Restaurant 3029 Rossville Blvd. (423) 805-4443 Mike’s Hole in the Wall 538 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 475-5259 Mitch’s Sports Bar 2555 Harrison Pike (423) 698-4123 Moe’s Original BBQ 221 Market St. (423) 531-6637 Mojo Burrito 3815 St. Elmo Ave. (423) 822-6656 1800 Dayton Blvd. (423) 870-6656 1414 Jenkins Rd. (423) 296-6656 Molcajete Mexican Restaurant 6231 Perimeter Dr. (423) 760-8200 Mountain City Club 729 Chestnut St. (423) 756-5584 Nick and Linda’s 4762 Hwy. 58 (423) 386-5404 North River Pub 7001 Middle Valley Rd. Suite #101 (423) 385-8918 O’Charley’s 5301 Hixson Pike (423) 877-8966 2340 Shallowford Village Dr. (423) 892-3343 Odd Story Brewing Co. 336 E. MKL Blvd. (423) 682-7690 Old Chicago Pizza 250 Northgate Mall (423) 877-3450 Outback Steakhouse 501 Northgate Mall (423) 870-0980 2120 Hamilton Place Blvd. (423) 899-2600 P.F. Chang’s 2110 Hamilton Place Blvd. (423) 242-0045 Pickle Barrel 1012 Market St. (423) 266-1103 Poblano’s Mexican Cuisine 551 River St. (423) 490-7911



Porkchops Bar & Grill 6727 Ringgold Rd. (423) 296-2571 Porter’s Steakhouse 827 Broad St. (423) 643-1240 Provino’s 5084 S. Terrace Plaza (423) 443-4927 Public House 1110 Market St. (423) 266-3366 Raw Bar & Grill 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919 Regan’s Place 1518 Market St. (423) 803-2535 Rodizio Grill 439 Broad St. (423) 777-4999 Rumors 3884 Hixson Pike (423) 870-3003 Ruth’s Chris Steak House 2321 Lifestyle Way (423) 602-5900 Sekisui 1120 Houston St. (423) 267-4600 Shogun Japanese Steak & Sushi 1806 Gunbarrel Rd. (423) 296-6500 Sing It or Wing It 410 Market St. (423) 757-9464

Sky Zoo 5709 Lee Hwy. (423) 521-2966 Slick’s Burgers 309 E Main St. (423)760-4878 Sluggo’s 501 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 752-5224 Smokey Bones Bar & Fire Grill 2225 Gunbarrel Rd. (423) 893-7850 Sofa King Juicy Burger 1743 Dayton Blvd. (423) 490-7632 Southern Burger Co. 9453 Bradmore Ln., Ooltewah (423) 825-4919 Southside Saloon and Bistro 1301 Chestnut St. (423) 757-4730 Southside Social 1818 Chestnut St. (423) 708-3280 St. John’s 1278 Market St. (423) 266-4400 Sticky Fingers 2031 Hamilton Pl. Blvd. (423) 899-7427 420 Broad St. (423) 265-7427 Sushi Nabe of Kyoto 110 River St. (423) 634-0171

Sweet Basil 5845 Brainerd Rd. (423) 485-8836 T.MAC 423 Market St. (423) 267-8226 Taco Mamacita 109 N. Market St. (423) 648-6262 Taconooga 207-A Frazier Ave. (423) 757-5550 8174 E. Brainerd Rd. (423) 475-6192 Taco Roc 6960 Old Lee Hwy. (423) 653-1001 Taqueria Jalisco 1634 Rossville Ave. (423) 509-3430 850 Market St. (423) 362-8056 T-Roy’s 2300 Glass St. (423) 629-8908 Teasers Bikini Bar & Grill 1401 E. 23rd St. (423) 622-6734 Terminal Brewhouse 6 E. 14th St. (423) 752-8090 TerraMae Appalachian Bistro 122 E. 10th St. (423) 710-2925 Terra Nostra Tapas & Wine Bar 105 Frazier Ave. (423) 634-0238

Texas Roadhouse 7016 Shallowford Rd. (423) 899-8293 The Backstage Bar 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 The Bitter Alibi 825 Houston St. (423) 362-5070 The Blue Plate 191 Chestnut St. (423) 648-6767 The Brew & Cue 5017 Rossville Blvd. (423) 867-9402 The Casual Pint 5550 Highway 153. Suite 103 (423) 800-5990 The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 The Chop House 2011 Gunbarrel Rd. (423) 892-1222 The Dwell Hotel 120 E. 10th St. (423) 267-7866 The Foundry Chattanoogan Hotel 1201 Broad St. (423) 424-3775 The Honest Pint 35 Patten Pkwy. (423) 468-4192 The Meeting Place 1278 Market St. (423) 266-4400

THE PULSE • SRPING DRINK GUIDE • MARCH 16, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • 31 The Office Inside City Café 901 Carter St. (423) 634-9191 The Palms at Hamilton 6925 Shallowford Rd. (423) 499-5055 The Social 1110 Market St. (423) 266-3366 Tipoff Sports Bar & Grill 830 Dodson Ave. (423) 622-2900 Tony’s Pasta Shop & Trattoria 212 High St. (423) 265-5033 Totto Sushi & Gril 330 Frazier Ave. (423) 508-8898 Tremont Tavern 1203 Hixson Pike (423) 266-1996 Tupelo Honey 1110 Market St. (423) 779-0400 Underground 2503 Westside Dr. (423) 485-3873 Universal Joint 532 Lookout St. (423) 468-3725 Urban Stack Burger Lounge 12 W. 13th St. (423) 475-5350 Wine Down 9431 Bradmore Ln., Ooltewah, Ste 109 (423) 531-9463 Ziggy’s 607 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 265-8711

Beer, Wine & Liquor Sales ABC Liquors 3948 Brainerd Rd. (423) 622-5915 Athens Distributing Company 4126 S. Creek Rd. (423) 629-7311 Bacchus Wine & Spirits 5721 Hwy. 153 (423) 875-2999 bacchuswinesandspirits. com Beverage World 1840 Old Lafayette Rd., Fort Oglethorpe, Ga. (706) 866-5644 Bonny Oaks Liquor 4915 Bonny Oaks Dr. (423) 521-4312 CJ’s Liquor 6401 Hixson Pike (423) 842-2400 Collegedale Tobacco & Beverage Mart 9409 Apison Pike (423) 615-0021 DeBarge Winery 1617 Rossville Ave. (423) 710-8426 Discount Tobacco & Beer, Etc. 7000 Lee Hwy. (423) 531-6940 East Brainerd Wine & Spirits 7804 E. Brainerd Rd.


(423) 855-4120 Empire Distributors 3794 Tag Rd. (423) 899-3962 Hamilton Liquor 2288 Gunbarrel Rd. (423) 894-3194 Henry’s EZ Liquor 5012 Hwy. 58 (423) 899-4452 Highway 58 Liquors 4762 Hwy. 58 (423) 899-6592 Imbibe 1616 Broad St. (423) 777-4820 Island Point Wine & Spirits 5987 Brainerd Rd. (423) 553-1515 Jax Liquors 216 Market St. (423) 266-8420 J D’s Liquor Stores 3209 Broad St. (423) 267-1024 J J’s Liquor Store 4204 Rossville Blvd. (423) 867-1720 J & R Liquors

2121 E. 23rd St. (423) 622-6605 Ken’s Liquor Store 6015 Dayton Blvd. (423) 875-3305 Lakesite Wine & Spirits 8711 Hixson Pike (423) 451-7723 Lamplight Package Store 5032 Brainerd Rd. (423) 899-9860 Louie’s Liquors 541 Signal Mountain Rd. (423) 468-4471 Mack’s Highway Market 4401 Ringgold Rd. (423) 624-5788 Mountain Top Wine & Spirits 1807 Taft Hwy. 7A, Signal Mtn. (423) 886-9463 Oasis Liquors 7003 Lee Hwy. (423) 899-7372 Ooltewah Discount Liquor 9207 Lee Hwy. (423) 238-9177 Red Bank Wine & Spirits 3849 Dayton Blvd. (423) 877-1787

Riley’s Wine and Spirits 4818 Hixson Pike (423) 870-2156 rileyswineandspirits. com Rivermont Wine & Spirits 3600 Hixson Pike (423) 870-4388 Riverside Wine & Spirits 600 Manufacturers Rd. (423) 267-4305 Ronnie’s Wine & Spirits 7022 Shallowford Rd. (423) 899-1986 Sandy’s Liquor Store 2410 Glass St. (423) 698-8751 Sigler’s Craft Beer & Cigars 1309 Panorama Dr. (423) 485-3271 Signal View Liquors 252 Signal Mountain Rd. (423) 756-1175 Sports Wine & Spirits 5510 Hwy. 153 (423) 870-4555 Tobacco & Beer Mart 6025 E. Brainerd Rd. (423) 531-3916

We strive to make our listings accurate, but things change. We recommend you call in advance or visit websites before visiting any restaurant. For updates and special deals, please visit

Tobacco & Beverage Mart 4340 Ringgold Rd. (423) 622-3600 Valley Wine & Spirits 3548 Cummings Hwy. (423) 821-6842 Vine & Barrel 5506 Hixson Pike, (423) 702-5763 Vintage Wine & Spirits 800 Mountain Creek Rd. (423) 877-9474 Welcome Liquor 2001 S. Market St. (423) 756-0187

Odds & Ends A Silverware Affair 6727 Heritage Business Ct. #119 (423) 296-4204 Apron Strings

Catering Co. 3018 Cummings Hwy. (423) 486-1783 Black Tie Affair 1129 Valentine Cir. (423) 266-0250 Cakeman’s Catering 4272 Bonny Oaks Dr. (423) 493-0090 Chattanooga Brew Choo 21 W. 28th St. (423) 415-4991 Dish T’Pass 302 W. 6th St. (423) 309-5353 Events With Taste (423) 508-8023 GQR Catering 641 N. Valley Dr. (423) 933-2300 Moss Place Catering 711 Tunnel Blvd. (423) 493-9006 Lee Towery Catering 1303 Hixson Pike #C (423) 267-9515 Lockhart’s Fire & Smoke Catering 909 Belvoir Hills Cir. (423) 421-8872 On The List Catering 100 Cherokee Blvd. Suite #120 (423) 290-1081 Pints & Pedals 3712 Ringgold Rd. (423) 380-8359 Superior Catering Services 2103 S. Highland Park Ave. (423) 698-4244 Swiss-Am Seasoning 1401 E. 34th St. (423) 867-7752 Map these locations on And be sure to check out our weekly "Food & Dining" section for the latest news and columns on your favortie bars and restaurants.



Brewhaus S

itting in a prime location on Frazier Avenue on Chattanooga’s North Shore is the unique German–American gastro pub, Brewhaus. With a relaxed and homey feel, Brewhaus is a great place to grab a hearty portion of some very unique food. When walking inside, you can’t help but be blown away by the stunning view of the Walnut Street Bridge and the Tennessee River. At Brewhaus, they treat you like family and are never eager to rush you out the door. You are greeted with friendly faces, who immediately make you feel as if it’s your home away from home, where you can sit back, relax and enjoy some good food and drink.

Most people know Brewhaus has great drinks, but their food is great too, especially their flavorful new Sunday brunch. When it comes to food, it’s all about being seasonal. Brewhaus has some very unique dishes, including a German cottage pie, and bangers and mash. The German cottage pie, inspired by the classic shepherds pie has seasoned ground beef and pork, sautéed with onions, peas, carrots, and corn. Topped with a wildly delicious Granny Smith apple mashed potatoes with melted cheese, it’s a culinary experience you won’t soon forget. Brewhaus’s bangers and mash has


the same unique Granny Smith apple mash, with two grilled brats all topped with haus-made gravy. These two dishes are more than enough to satisfy anyone interested in trying a classic dish with a German-southern twist. But it wouldn’t be Brewhaus without talking about beer. Brewhaus is all about pairing your hearty and flavorful dishes with a cold brew. At Brewhaus the options are plentiful, affordable,

and ever changing. For St. Patty’s day, Brewhaus will be featuring the local Oddstory red ale. Along with the local Oddstory, you can expect some tasty dry Irish stouts to quench your thirst this St. Patty’s Day. Or if you’re in the mood to try the tasty German bottles available, you can never go wrong with the Franziskaner Hefe that is smooth, creamy, and has hints of banana.


The Casual Pint W

here Beer Lovers Meet! The Casual Pint Craft Beer Market in Hixson, offers a relaxed, family friendly atmosphere much like a coffee shop, with a focus on Craft Beer. The expert “Beertenders” can serve up Craft Beer by the pint from 30 taps to enjoy in the store, or help you select some for home. Local owners Judy and Dan Kearnaghan, invite you to come in and enjoy a beer and/or dinner with friends, neighbors, and other craft beer enthusiasts. A great pub menu is also available including, Seasonal Beer Soaked Brats, Sidewinder Potatoes with Beer Cheese,

and a selection of wraps and flatbreads. An active weekly schedule commonly includes live music, trivia on Monday nights, pint nights, throughout the week, Brewga, and other fun activities. With 22 quickly rotating taps, the staff works hard to make sure that your last taste of beer is just as fresh as your first taste. The system is a direct draw tap system that has very short lines to prevent beer from sitting in the line too long. The lines are cleaned thoroughly with every keg change and are usually poured into a nucleated pint glass. Best of Local & Best of Craft are two phrases that come to mind when de-

ciding what to choose as you will commonly find great craft beers brewed right here in Chattanooga, as well as the best of craft beers brewed in Tennessee, around the U.S., and around the world. There is even a private room avail-

able for events such as a corporate training, birthday party or just getting together with friends to watch your favorite team. Growler Fills, Mix-A-Six Packs out of a well-stocked bottle & can cooler, or packaged beer is also available to go.



New Amsterdam Vodka: It's Your Town N

ew Amsterdam Vodka is five-times distilled from the finest grains then filtered three times. It’s so smooth you can create a perfect cocktail or drink it straight, making it one of the best vodkas available. Our premium process makes our distilled vodka as iconic as the cityscape on the bottle. Our flavors are crafted using our award winning original 80-proof vodka. And as good as the Original Vodka is, New Amsterdam has an entire line of great tasting flavored vodkas, perfect for any occasion or specialty cocktail. Peach vodka refreshes your drink with a subtle sweetness that helps summer come early and stay late. This peach-flavored vodka mixes perfectly with your favorite cocktails. Pineapple vodka stays crisp and fresh under situations of extreme pressure, like doing the limbo. For the weekend, try our pineapple-flavored vodka. Mango vodka adds a subtle tropical flavor to your drink without demanding a frilly, little umbrella. Liven up your drink with a splash of our mango-flavored vodka. Red Berry vodka creates bold cocktails that take your night where it’s always wanted to go. Explore our blackberry, strawberry & raspberry vodka infusion on your next evening adventure. Coconut vodka brings the smooth island vibe to your drink but leaves the clanging steel drum behind for better beats. Find your rhythm with this coconut-flavored vodka. Orange vodka offers sweet citrus 36 • THE PULSE • MARCH 16, 2017 • SPRING DRINK GUIDE • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

flavors to give your cocktail complexity that goes down easy. Brighten up your drink with our refreshing orange-flavored vodka. Citron vodka stays smooth while infusing the tang of New Amsterdam’s most popular supporters: lemon and lime. This lemon vodka will add the perfect amount of zest to your liquid concoction. But there’s a lot more to New Amsterdam Vodka than just premium taste. The master mixologists at New Amsterdam have created a number of tasty cocktails for you to make on your own for dinner parties or just to impress your friends Amsterdam Mule • 2 parts New Amsterdam Vodka • 3 parts ginger beer • ½ part simple syrup • ½ part fresh lime juice • Sprig of mint Pour vodka over ice. Add simple syrup & lime juice. Top with ginger beer and stir. Spank mint sprig (to release aromas) & add as garnish.

Serve in Amsterdam Mule mug or metal mug. Peach Sunrise • 2½ parts New Amsterdam Peach • 4 part orange juice • 1 part pineapple juice Shake ingredients together in a cocktail shaker half-filled with ice cubes. Strain into a martini glass and serve or strain into a classic highball glass filled with ice cubes and serve. Black Diamond • 2 parts New Amsterdam Vodka • ½ part sweet vermouth • ½ part fresh lemon juice • ½ part maple syrup Shake ingredients very well with ice and strain into a martini glass. Garnish with lemon peel. So the next time you’re at your favorite vendor of fine spirits, pick up a bottle of New Amsterdam and experience premium vodka taste without having to pay premium prices. New Amsterdam. It’s your town.





The Second Wave Of The 2017 CFF Even more intriguing films are lined up for the upcoming Chattanooga Film Festival

Are Your Ready To Face Your Mortality? It's been said that death is the great equalizer. It's something we all face, no matter who we are or what we've accomplished in our lives. And yet, many people are loathe to look ahead and plan for our own mortality. Facing death is something that's a lot easier with help from others, which is why the Chattanooga Library will be hosting a free screening and discussion of the PBS program Being Mortal this Saturday at 1 p.m. Being Mortal delves into the hopes of patients and families facing terminal illness. The film investigates the practice of caring for the dying and explores the relationships between patients and their doctors. It follows a surgeon, Dr. Atul Gawande, as he shares stories from the people and families he encounters. When Dr. Gawande’s own father gets cancer, his search for answers about how to best care for the dying becomes a personal quest. After the screening, you can participate in a guided conversation on how to take concrete steps to identify and communicate wishes about end-of-life goals and preferences. It may seem a bit morbid, but anything that makes facing mortality easier is a benefit for all. Being Mortal Screening & Discussion Saturday, 1 p.m. Chattanooga Public Library, 4th Floor 1001 Broad Street (423) 643-7700 40 • THE PULSE • MARCH 16, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

“Our Heavenly Bodies”

By John DeVore Pulse Film Editor


HE SECOND WAVE OF THE UPCOMing Chattanooga Film Festival has been announced and it’s a cavalcade of interesting films accompanied by specials guests of all sorts. As always, there will be a variety of talented filmmakers and industry professionals on hand to answer questions and introduce their films, giving audience unique insight into their processes and creative inspiration. This year includes several local experts, especially underscoring the “Chattanooga” of the Chattanooga Film Festival. Highlights of the announcement can be found below, but as always, the full list, as well as tickets and VIP badges, can be found at Our Heavenly Bodies Director Hanns Walter Kornblum With Live Score by Coupler

In 1925, German director Hanns Walter Kornblum wanted to create a film unlike any before it, a summation of all the astronomical knowledge available at the time and a dreamy investigation of what wonders might await humanity at the advent of space travel. One of the silent era’s most gorgeous visionary films together with an electrifying live score provided by Coupler, a Nashvillebased band founded by Ryan Norris (Lambchop) that describes itself as “an exploration of the intersections of man and machine, live and recorded, composed and improvised, stasis and flux.” SCORE: A Film Music Documentary Director: Matt Schrader Q&A with Chattanooga Symphony Principal Pops Conductor Bob Bernhardt What makes a score unforgettable? SCORE: A Film Music Documentary will tell you. The film shows how painstaking the process of writing any score, let alone a memorable one, can be, and features interviews with many of the world’s finest

FILM & TELEVISION film score composers, including John Williams (Star Wars, Jaws, Indiana Jones), Danny Elman (Batman, Spider-Man) and Hans Zimmer (Driving Miss Daisy, Rain Man, Pirates of the Caribbean). The Crest Director: Mark Covino Q&A following with Mark Covino Mark Covino has had a long tradition of CFF attendance, with screenings of his debut feature A Band Called Death, and workshops on documentary filmmaking. This year he returns with a new documentary. The Crest is a gorgeously shot and edited surf documentary, but a closer look reveals a timely tale of family, of immigration, and the importance of preserving traditions and cultures. Whose Streets? Director: Sabaah Folayan The activists and leaders who live and breathe this movement for justice bring you a documentary about the Ferguson uprising. When unarmed teenager Michael Brown is killed by police and then left lying in the street for hours, it marks a breaking point for the residents

of St. Louis County. Grief, longstanding tension, and renewed anger bring residents together to hold vigil and protest this latest tragedy. In the days that follow, artists, musicians, teachers and parents turn into freedom fighters, standing on the front lines to demand justice. Beauty is Embarrassing Director: Neil Berkeley Intro and Q&A by Wayne White Beauty Is Embarrassing is a funny, irreverent, joyful and inspiring documentary featuring the life and current times of one of America’s most important artists, Chattanooga’s own Wayne White, whose multifaceted talents are on display at Wayne-O-Rama. Wayne will be on hand to introduce this film and do a post-film Q&A. This is a free event that will be shown at Neural Alley—Passageways in partnership with River City Company, WayneO-Rama and generously sponsored by Maclellan Apartments. Lost in Paris Directors: Dominique Abel, Fiona Gordon Fiona visits Paris for the first time to assist her myopic Aunt Martha. Catastrophes ensue,

mainly involving Dom, a homeless man who has yet to have an emotion or thought he was afraid of expressing. This crowd pleasing comedy looks and feels like a classic screwball picture and gave us some serious warm fuzzies. 24x36 Director: Kevin Burke A documentary that explores the birth, death and resurrection of illustrated movie poster art. Through interviews with a number of key art personalities from the past four decades, 24×36 aims to answer the question of what happened to the illustrated movie poster? Where did it disappear to, and why?  Deus Ex Machine: The Philosophy of Donnie Darko Director: Daniel Griffith Daniel Griffith in attendance The 15th Anniversary 4k Restoration along with new documentary about the classic film Deus Ex Machine: The Philosophy of Donnie Darko. Also an evil Easter Bunny photo booth in the CFF tent will help us celebrate this honest-to-god contemporary classic. The Chattanooga Film Festival runs April 6-9.


Beauty and the Beast A live-action adaptation of the classic Disney fairy tale about a monstrous-looking prince and a young woman who fall in love. Director: Bill Condon Stars: Emma Watson, Dan Stevens, Luke Evans, Josh Gad

T2 Trainspotting After 20 years abroad, Mark Renton returns to Scotland and reunites with his old friends Sick Boy, Spud, and Begbie. Director: Danny Boyle Stars: Ewan McGregor, Ewen Bremner, Jonny Lee Miller, Robert Carlyle




In Praise Of The All-American Bar Our man on the barstool extols the virtues of communal drinking By Michael Thomas Pulse contributor


VER SINCE I TURNED 21 (AND NOT a minute beforehand, honest, officer), I’ve been a big fan of bars. High-end bars, dive bars, hotel bars, cocktail lounges, tiki bars, restaurant bars, nightclub bars, and even (when pressed) a fern bar. I judge my travels and vacations not of the sights I’ve seen or the attractions I’ve visited, but on the bars/lounges/pubs I’ve spent a seemingly inordinate amount of my free time inhabiting. Listing my top ten places to visit isn’t by location, but by where I’ve tipped a glass or two of tasty intoxicants. A long line of girlfriends, most of whom I met in a bar now that I think about it, have often questioned my love for social drinking. And with reason, for I am in fact considered to be the classic lightweight when it comes to imbibing. Even so, it’s rare for me to go more than a few days without spending a few quality hours passing the time in one of my favorite watering holes. “Why do you go out, when you have a full bar at home?” they ask. “Why do you want to spend ten times what it costs to buy a bottle, paying by the drink?” The simple answer is that I’m not paying for the drink; I’m paying for the community. Some people spends hundreds of dollars on golf equipment, greens fees, cart rentals, golf clothes and whatnot for personal entertainment. I do the same thing, only indoors, surrounded by like-minded people, and without having to exert more energy than it takes to raise and lower a pint glass. Turning through the pages of this very issue of The Pulse, you’ll be introduced (or re-introduced) to many of Chattanooga’s finest drinking establishments. Of which

we are blessed to have quite a variety from which to choose. Having once lived in a dry county in the Georgia hinterlands, I, more than most, truly appreciate how “blessed” is the appropriate word to use. “But why go to bars to hang out with people? Surely there are less expensive places to be sociable,” that long line of exes has asked more than once. Indeed, there are many places to go, but there is something about bars that makes them far more interesting to me: the spirit of the people (no pun intended). Okay, maybe the pun was a bit intended. But to my point, I’ve always enjoyed to company of other drinkers. Alcohol has long been called the “social lubricant”, and for a very good reason. When people get a drink or two inside them,

“Turning through the pages of this very issue of The Pulse, you’ll be introduced (or re-introduced) to many of Chattanooga’s finest drinking establishments” they tend to relax and let their hair down socially. You can have discussions about nearly everything under the sun: sports, politics, entertainment, politics, music, poli-

tics, history, and even a political discussion or two. Try doing that at the library. Even better is when you find the “regular” bar. That one establishment that you make a habit of returning to like a swallow to Capistrano, only a lot more often. You get to know the regulars, the bartenders, the barbacks, even the delivery people. Okay, maybe I spend a bit too much time in my favorite establishments, but that’s just me; I like meeting people. “You just like spending time with those people more than me.” Well, to be honest, they don’t care if I’ve vacuumed the house, fed the dog, taken out the trash, made the bed, remembered their birthday, or replaced the toilet paper roll. So, maybe I do. And maybe next time around I need to start dating a bartender.



The Dead Testaments Are Back With Passion One of the best bands in Chattanooga returns with a brand new EP, and are (take it from us) even better

Get Your Folk On At Charles & Myrtle’s The Belle Hollows, an acoustic folk group who recently released their first album, Miller’s Creek, are not strangers when it comes to performing together. The trio, which consists of siblings Rachel and Jeremy Johnson, and Robert Phaneuf, originally began playing together as members of The Barrel Jumpers, a newgrass band from Nashville. They spent close to a decade carving out their own unique sound, which eventually resulted in the formation of their own band, The Belle Hollows, and they’ll be performing at Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse this Saturday at 8 p.m. Miller’s Creek consists of nine original songs written and later recorded in Nashville’s Glass Onion studios. The album was co-produced with engineer JD Tiner and Jeremy Johnson, and was recorded with the help of several other musicians, notably a bassist, Dobro and banjoist, accordion, bodhran and tin whistle player. The trio is incredibly skilled at vocal harmonies and acoustic folk melodies. The group’s primary members play acoustic guitar and mandolin, which results in their beautifully honest tunes and rich vocals. If you listened to the Johnsons and Phaneuf when they were members of The Barrel Jumpers, or if you’re just hoping to discover a new modern-day folk artist, then you won’t want to miss The Belle Hollows show at Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse. — Addie Whitlow The Belle Hollows Saturday, 8 p.m. Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse 105 McBrien Road (423) 892-4960 44 • THE PULSE • MARCH 16, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

By Marc T. Michael Pulse Music Editor


STARTED WRITING FOR THE PULSE IN 2013. The Dead Testaments were one of the first bands I covered and they instantly became (and remain) one of my favorite bands anywhere. Then they went silent. Members had other projects to pursue, life happened, and more than once I lamented the fact that they weren’t making more music. Of course, Dead Testaments was always a pick up band anyway, an assembly of brilliant players from several other bands (Elk Milk, Moonlight Bride, Forest Magic) brought together to get some music out of Abe Houck’s head, but results were so spectacular it seemed a pity they weren’t doing more.

Now it’s 2017 and Dead Testaments is back with an all new EP and, just for a moment, things are right in the world. It appears that over the last four years a band I thought couldn’t get any better got better, at least they’ve broadened an already impressive palette of sonic colors to paint with. Right there in that metaphor is the key to band. Listening to a Testaments song is like having a picture painted in your head, rich and full of texture sometimes with subtle strokes, other times with broad splashes of paint, but all of it coalescing into a beautiful final image. I don’t want to belabor the point, but there is even poetry in the way they arrange the songs. The level of artistry is astonishing. There are five songs on the new EP and while many of the familiar hallmarks of the Dead Testaments are there (hints of Leonard Cohen, moody,


“I think it speaks to the vitality and staying power of the music that ninety years later those songs are being performed just as they were back then.” atmospheric layers, complexity) there are some distinctive new elements as well. A distinctly country western guitar rhythm, banjo and slide guitar have all worked their way in to songs like “Ghosts of the Civil War Trees” and “Go Down Jonas” and the effect is that the Dead Testaments can own and genre or style they care to, making it their own. “Ghosts of the Civil War Trees” is a personal favorite, thematically reminiscent of Billie Holiday’s “Strange Fruit” though it concerns itself with blood of fallen soldiers rather than victims of barbaric racism. Lyrically and musically the song is flawless. Vocally, the tune rather reminds me of Damien Rice, an Irish singer/songwriter of some note. While a couple of tunes on the EP are clearly extensions of the band into new territory, others, like “Bouncing Heads,” pick up precisely where the band left off with their first release. Intentionally or not, “Bouncing Heads” sounds like a loving tribute to Leonard Cohen, vocally, musically, thematically. “Good Union Man” shares some common ground with the band Wax

Shamrock City Gets In The Holiday Spirit

Fang, another personal favorite from my home town, and can only be described as sonically lush. In fact, lush is a good term for the arrangements of the band, up to and including the final track, “Redrum.” There is an inherent danger in many bands doing what the Dead Testaments do. Complex layers of instrumentation can be a crutch, or a band-aid for otherwise weak music, but the trick is that it isn’t an effective band-aid, it just makes a “not very good” song bloated and even worse. When you operate at the level these musicians do, though, there is no danger of that, that don’t write or perform bad songs and everything they do is done with so deft a touch that even if you don’t care for the music itself (though I do, in spades) you’d still have to acknowledge the skill and artistry of it. In taste, all things are subjective. Acknowledging that, I’m just going to put it out there that the Dead Testaments in general and their new EP in particular represent some of the very best talent to come out of this area, period. I cannot recommend this new release enough and as soon as it is commercially available I’ll announce it here.

If weird weather made you miss last weekend’s festivities at Rock City’s annual “Shamrock City” celebration, you’re in luck. The celebration picks up again this weekend (Saturday and Sunday, to be specific) with warmer weather, clearer skies, and a host of entertainers and attractions for the whole family! The band Carolina Ceili, renowned for their rousing fiddle tunes and four-part vocal harmonies, will be joined by local favorite Olta, whose traditional tunes are the perfect complement to the holiday. Roaming bagpipers will leave you feeling like you’re in the highlands throughout the day and the beautiful harp music of Ellen Shiraef will transport you back to the emerald isle itself. Some of the finest Irish dancers the event has seen will be there to demonstrate their prowess and

Carolina Ceili

offer up some dance lessons as well. Traditional food in the way of Mulligan’s stew and corned beef and cabbage will be served up in the pavilion while fish and chips and Guinness floats (with Clumpies Ice Cream) are available elsewhere on site. A petting zoo, a caricature artist, a mine, a climbing wall, and more activities for the kids than you can shake a shillelagh help to make this one of the most family friendly events of the holiday! — Marc T. Michael




Son Volt

Caney Creek Company

St. Paddy’s Party on the Parkway

Blues rock stalwarts hit the road in support of their twentieth studio album, Notes of Blue, with a high-energy show. 9 p.m. Revelry Room 41 Station St.

Bluegrass fused with elements of folk and indie rock makes Caney Creek Co. a force to be reckoned with in the "pickin' world". 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd.

Come downtown for the best St. Patrick's Day party in the city with plenty of live music and fun! 2 p.m. The Honest Pint 35 Patten Pkwy.




THURSDAY3.16 James Crumble Trio 6 p.m. St. John’s Meeting Place 1278 Market St. Rick Rushing Blues Jazz N’ Friends 6 p.m. Bluewater Grille 224 Broad St. Forever Bluegrass 6 p.m. Whole Foods Market 301 Manufacturers Rd. Prime Country Band 6:30 p.m. Motley’s 320 Emberson Dr. Ringgold, GA (706) 260-8404 Starry Mountain Singers Concert 7 p.m. Crabtree Farms of Chattanooga 1000 E. 30th St. Bluegrass Thursdays 7:30 p.m. Feed Co. Table & Tavern 201 W. Main St. Jesse James & Tim Neal 7:30 p.m. Mexi-Wing VII 5773 Brainerd Rd. Keepin’ It Local 8 p.m. The Social


1110 Market St. Road to Nightfall 2017 8 p.m. The Granfalloon 400 E. Main St. Open Mic with Hap Henninger 9 p.m. The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. Son Volt, Johnny Irion 9 p.m. Revelry Room 41 Station St.

FRIDAY3.17 Eddie Pontiac 6 p.m. El Meson

2204 Hamilton Place Blvd. Binji Varsossa 6 p.m. Cancun Mexican Restaurant 1809 Broad St. (423) 266-1461 Tim Lewis 7 p.m. El Meson 248 Northgate Park Cole Washburn, Hannah Bethel 8 p.m. Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse 105 McBrien Rd. Road to Nightfall 2017 8 p.m. The Granfalloon 400 E. Main St. Alex Griffith

LIVE MUSIC SPOTLIGHT Butch Ross celebrates the release of his newest recording, Found Objects, with music from the album along with the Chattanooga Dulcimer Club. Butch Ross CD Release Concert Saturday, 7 p.m. Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave.

8 p.m. The Casual Pint Hixson 5550 Hwy. 153 Priscilla & Little Rickee 8:30 p.m. The Foundry 1201 Broad St. The Hopeful Country Band 8:30 p.m. Motley’s 320 Emberson Dr. Ringgold, GA (706) 260-8404 Silver Tongued Devilz, The Murder Of Jane Crow, Wheathouse, Sparky & The Band 9 p.m. Ziggy’s Bar and Grill 607 Cherokee Blvd. Shenandoah 30th Anniversary Tour 9 p.m. Revelry Room 41 Station St. Caney Creek Company, Blonde Bones, Peak Physique 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. Crunk Bones & Friends 9 p.m. The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. Courtney Holder 9 p.m. Puckett’s Grocery 2 W. Aquarium Way


Pillow Talk The Power Players 10 p.m. Clyde’s On Main 122 W. Main St. St. Patrick’s Day Weekend with Mic Larry 10 p.m. Raw Bar & Grill 409 Market St. Aunt Betty 10 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar 5751 Brainerd Rd.

SATURDAY3.18 Olta, Carolina Ceili 11 a.m., 2 p.m. Rock City Gardens 1400 Patten Rd. 4th Annual St. Paddy’s Party on the Parkway 2 p.m. The Honest Pint 35 Patten Pkwy. Eddie Pontiac 6 p.m. El Meson 2204 Hamilton Place Blvd. Binji Varsossa 6 p.m. Cancun Mexican Restaurant 1809 Broad St. (423) 266-1461 Tim Lewis 7 p.m.

El Meson 248 Northgate Park Butch Ross CD Release Concert 7 p.m. Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. The Country Connecting Band 7 p.m. Teamster’s Union Hall 4431 Bonny Oaks Dr. (423) 893-8983 Disruptors: Women in Leadership Concert Event 7:30 p.m. The Camp House 149 E. MLK Blvd. Road to Nightfall 2017 8 p.m. The Granfalloon 400 E. Main St. The Belle Hollows 8 p.m. Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse 105 McBrien Rd. Priscilla & Little 8:30 p.m. The Foundry 1201 Broad St. Bubba Harris, Ian Sharp 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. The Courtney Daly Band 9 p.m. Puckett’s Grocery 2 W. Aquarium Way Soul Mechanic, Voodoo Visionary 9 p.m. Revelry Room 41 Station St. The Sullivan Band 10 p.m. Clyde’s On Main 122 W. Main St. Heather Kilgore 10 p.m. The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. St. Patrick’s Day Weekend with Mic Larry 10 p.m. Raw Bar & Grill 409 Market St. Aunt Betty 10 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar 5751 Brainerd Rd.

SUNDAY3.19 Olta, Carolina Ceili 11 a.m., 2 p.m. Rock City Gardens 1400 Patten Rd. Nathan Kalish 11 a.m. Flying Squirrel Bar 55 Johnson St. Booker Scruggs Trio 1:30 p.m.

Flying Squirrel Bar 55 Johnson St. Gospel Sunday Brunch 1:30 p.m. Jazzanooga Arts Space 431 E. MLK Blvd. Acoustic Gospel Jam Session 6 p.m. Brainerd United Methodist 4315 Brainerd Rd. Open Mic with Jeff Daniels 6 p.m. Long Haul Saloon 2536 Cummings Hwy. (423) 822-9775 Pillow Talk, ICANJAPAN, Harbor 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd.

MONDAY3.20 Monday Nite Big Band 7 p.m. The Coconut Room 6925 Shallowford Rd. Very Open Mic with Shawnessey Cargile 8 p.m. The Well 1800 Rossville Blvd. #8 Open Mic Night 6 p.m. Puckett’s Grocery 2 W. Aquarium Way CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MARCH 16, 2017 • THE PULSE • 47


Martin Barre Band Open Air with Jessica Nunn 7:30 p.m. The Granfalloon 400 E. Main St. Downtown Boys, Sneaks, LUNG, Snarky 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd.

TUESDAY3.21 Bill McCallie and In Cahoots 6:30 p.m. Southern Belle 201 Riverfront Pkwy. Open Mic with Mike McDade 8 p.m. Tremont Tavern 1203 Hixson Pike Brit Floyd - Immersion World Tour 8 p.m. Soldiers & Sailors Memorial Auditorium 399 McCallie Ave.

WEDNESDAY3.22 Lucid Tales Productions Presents: LT Jams 11:30, 2:30 Chattanooga State Amphitheater 4501 Amnicola Hwy. Eddie Pontiac 5:30 p.m. El Meson 248 Northgate Park


No Big Deal 6 p.m. SpringHill Suites 495 Riverfront Pkwy. Martin Barre Band 8 p.m. Revelry Room 41 Station St. Joel Clyde 8 p.m. The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. Priscilla & Little Rickee 8 p.m. Las Margaritas 1101 Hixson Pike (423) 756-3332 Dexter Bell Quartet 8 p.m. Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. Conor Oberst 9 p.m. Track 29 1400 Market St. Thelma and the Sleeze 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. Prime Cut Trio 9 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton 6925 Shallowford Rd. Map these locations on chattanoogapulse. com. Send event listings at least 10 days in advance to:


Jack Wright and Roughousing You Haven't Heard This, Richard Pinhas Reverse

Jack Wright and Roughhousing You Haven’t Heard This (Spring Garden Music)


axophonist Jack Wright is known as a fiercely original improviser and also one of the most deliberative voices on the topic of “free playing,” which he has been doing exclusively since 1979 and which he concisely describes as “the pursuit of pleasure through making sound that is as truly of one’s own making in that moment as possible.” He recently released his insightful and unstuffily enjoyable book The Free Musics, which, if ordered from the artist, comes with the accompanying CD You Haven’t Heard This. Dense with ideas, but not impenetrable, the book offers numerous bold, thought-provok-

Richard Pinhas Reverse (Bureau B) ing statements in its discussion of free jazz, free improvisation (improv outside any genre) and “the present situation.” Wright writes that free playing “is available for musicians who acknowledge the current deadin-the-water state of improvised musics and wish to move out of it” and that it “exposes the gap separating human beings at play from musicians functioning as entertainers.” Music can be a commodity. Music is a part of culture and can bring a sense of belonging and comfort. However, in Wright’s view, these concerns are beside the point, for those who want to “take playing to the highest lev-

el” and who can put aside their knowledge and reputations. Entering the world of free playing is likened to a child introduced to the ocean, “excited by a vastness you can’t possibly know is dangerous.” “When excitement is deprived of some component of fear, ‘adventurous music’ is just advertising,” he writes. If you say something audacious like this, then you better be able to deliver. Fortunately, You Haven’t Heard This is a potent example of Wright in action, both as a soloist and as a member of the trio Roughhousing with double bassist Evan Lipson and electric guitarist Zach Darrup. The first track is Roughhousing’s 30-minute set from a 2016 show in Johnson City, Tenn. with a thousand bursts of staccato stabs, eerie wisps of aural spectres, moans, bleats, stifled skronks and much more; it alternates between being mind-arresting and contemplative, tirelessly chipping away and scattering its abnormally shaped fragments. The remaining seven tracks are solo pieces from Wright on alto and soprano saxes, constantly offering piercing notes, odd timbres and strange, unpredictable moments of beauty, such as one passage where Wright’s sax sounds like a floating flute.

Wright compares solo free-playing to a “nothing to lose” situation where people have guns pointed at you. Both thorny and stunning, it’s music that comes from the odd combination of pleasure and selfinduced fear.


974 was a good year for the French musician Richard Pinhas. That year, he earned a PhD in Philosophy from the Sorbonne with a dissertation that dealt with science fiction, electronic music and time manipulation; that was also the year he founded the acclaimed electronic-rock band Heldon, and not long after, he also began making solo recordings, including an album heavily inspired by Frank Herbert’s Dune. Despite being a total creative badass for decades, Pinhas is under-recognized on this side of the pond, but a large and fascinating catalog is waiting for those who are ready to explore. His latest album Reverse has the ability to agitate despite largely being based on ambient drones, drawing from Pinhas’ long-standing inspiration from King Crimson guitarist Robert Fripp for shaping electric guitar sounds with looping and delay effects. Pinhas is joined by a remarkable assembly of collaborators, including Masami Akita (best known for his harsh-noise

work as Merzbow) on analog synths, drone guitarist Oren Ambarchi and percussionist William Winant, among others. The opener “Dronz 1 – Ketter” uses propulsive drums that constantly evoke a feeling as if the piece is ramping up and about to end, contrasting with hovering drones; rather than being wearying, it gives the listener vigor. As the volume turns down toward the end as things burn out, details are revealed, such as sparkling electronics that suggest the sputtering sounds of faulty equipment and drumbeats with wild pitch glides. “Dronz 2 – End” uses a constant rattling of cymbals and a funk-rock beat underneath diving guitar sounds that are slightly reminiscent of what My Bloody Valentine does. “Dronz 3 – Nefesh” is stingy with pitches—it seems to only use one long note on different instruments—but generous with varying timbres and envelope effects; its relentless attitude, particularly with the drums, may appeal to fans of Boredoms’ locomotive, electronic freak-out late-period work. The final track, “Dronz 4 – V2,” is drum-free, concentrating on sustained tones that have a flowing quality but also a sharp, bristly quality—perhaps like a giant tidal wave of shrapnel to engulf the listener.

Where the BIG Hits live! Chattanooga’s Greatest Hits CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MARCH 16, 2017 • THE PULSE • 49


The List

best impetus, but here are suggestions to stimulate your imagination: a young cactus; a jack-in-the-box; a rock with the word “sprout” written on it; a decorated marble egg; a fox mask; a Photoshopped image of you flying through the air like a superhero.

The World's Top Cocktails ROB BREZSNY

In keeping with the theme of this week's issue—drinking—we decided to find out what are the most popular cocktails in the world. So we asked the folks at to help us out, and here's what they said: 1. Cosmopolitan 2. Mojito 3. Mai Tai 4. Mint Julep 5. Caipirinha 6. Margarita 7. Pina Colada 8. Californication 9. Long Island Iced Tea 10. Apple Martini There will always be the Martini, Screwdriver, Bloody Mary and even the Tom Collins ordered with a fair amount of consistency at just about any bar. The Mimosa and Bellini have become standard additions to any bartender’s list, as well. These cocktails, however, have become trendy and popular or have managed to maintain their popularity despite great pressure from fine wine and even craft beer. Drink up and enjoy! Source:

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Would you like some free healing that’s in alignment with cosmic rhythms? Try this experiment. Imagine that you’re planning to write your autobiography. Create an outline that has six chapters. Each of the first three chapters will be about a past experience that helped make you who you are. In each of the last three chapters, you will describe a desirable event that you want to create in the future. I also encourage you to come up with a boisterous title for your tale. Don’t settle for My Life So Far or The Story of My Journey. Make it idiosyncratic and colorful, perhaps even outlandish, like Piscean author Dave Eggers’ A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius. ARIES (March 21-April 19): The more unselfish and compassionate you are in the coming weeks, the more likely it is you will get exactly what you need. Here are four ways that can be true: 1. If you’re kind to people, they will want to be kind to you in return. 2. Taking good care of others will bolster their ability to take good care of you. 3. If you’re less obsessed with I-me-mine, you will magically dissolve psychic blocks that have prevented certain folks from giving you all they are inclined to give you. 4. Attending to others’ healing will teach you valuable lessons in how to heal yourself—and how to get the healing you yearn for from others. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): I hope you will consider buying yourself some early birthday presents. The celebration is weeks away, but you need some prodding, instigative energy now. It’s crucial that you bring a dose of the starting-fresh spirit into the ripening projects you’re working on. Your mood might get overly cautious and serious unless you infuse it with the spunk of an excited beginner. Of course only you know what gifts would provide you with the


GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Many Geminis verbalize profusely and acrobatically. They enjoy turning their thoughts into speech, and love to keep social situations lively with the power of their agile tongues. Aquarians and Sagittarians may rival your tribe for the title of The Zodiac’s Best Bullshitters, but I think you’re in the top spot. Having heaped that praise on you, however, I must note that your words don’t always have as much influence as they have entertainment value. You sometimes impress people more than you impact them. But here’s the good news: In the coming weeks, that could change. I suspect your fluency will carry a lot of clout. Your communication skills could sway the course of local history. CANCER (June 21-July 22): Your world is more spacious than it has been in a long time. Congrats! I love the way you have been pushing yourself out of your comfort zone and into the wilder frontier. For your next trick, here’s my suggestion: Anticipate the parts of you that may be inclined to close down again when you don’t feel as brave and free as you do now. Then gently clamp open those very parts. If you calm your fears before they break out, maybe they won’t break out at all. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): I like rowdy, extravagant longing as much as anyone. I enjoy being possessed by a heedless greed for too much of everything that feels rapturous: delectable food, mysterious sex, engrossing information, liberating intoxication, and surprising conversations that keep me guessing and improvising for hours. But I am also a devotee of simple, sweet longing… pure, watchful, patient longing… open-hearted longing that brims with innocence and curiosity and is driven as much by the urge to bless as to be blessed. That’s the kind I recommend you explore and experiment with in the coming days. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): You know that forbidden fruit you’ve had your eyes on? Maybe it isn’t so forbidden any more. It could even be evolving toward a state where it will be

Homework: What are the main dreams you want to accomplish by 2025? Testify at both freely available and downright healthy for you to pluck. But there’s also a possibility that it’s simply a little less risky than it was before. And it may never become a fully viable option. So here’s my advice: Don’t grab and bite into that forbidden fruit yet. Keep monitoring the situation. Be especially attentive to the following questions: Do you crave the forbidden fruit because it would help you flee a dilemma you haven’t mustered the courage to escape from? Or because it would truly be good for you to partake of the forbidden fruit? LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): I expect you will get more than your usual share of both sweetness and tartness in the coming days. Sometimes one or the other will be the predominant mode, but on occasion they will converge to deliver a complex brew of WOW!-meets-WTF! Imagine chunks of sour apples in your vanilla fudge ripple ice cream. Given this state of affairs, there’s no good reason for you to be blandly kind or boringly polite. Use a saucy attitude to convey your thoughtfulness. Be as provocative as you are tender. Don’t just be nice—be impishly and subversively nice. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “I want to gather your darkness in my hands, to cup it like water and drink.” So says Jane Hirshfield in her poem “To Drink.” I bet she was addressing a Scorpio. Does any other sign of the zodiac possess a sweet darkness that’s as delicious and gratifying as yours? Yes, it’s true that you also harbor an unappetizing pocket of darkness, just like everyone else. But that sweet kind—the ambrosial, enigmatic, exhilarating stuff—is not only safe to imbibe, but can also be downright healing. In the coming days, I hope you’ll share it generously with worthy recipients. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Saturn has been in your sign steadily since September 2015, and will continue to be there until December 2017. Some traditional astrologers might say you are in a phase of downsizing and self-restraint. They’d encourage you to be extra strict and

serious and dutiful. To them, the ringed planet is an exacting taskmaster. There are some grains of truth in this perspective, but I like to emphasize a different tack. I say that if you cooperate with the rigors of Saturn, you’ll be inspired to become more focused and decisive and disciplined as you shed any flighty or reckless tendencies you might have. Yes, Saturn can be adversarial if you ignore its commands to be faithful to your best dreams. But if you respond gamely, it will be your staunch ally. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Born in the African nation of Burkina Faso, Malidoma Somé is a teacher who writes books and offers workshops to Westerners interested in the spiritual traditions of his tribe. In his native Dagaare language, his first name means “he who befriends the stranger/enemy.” I propose that we make you an honorary “Malidoma” for the next three weeks. It will be a favorable time to forge connections, broker truces, and initiate collaborations with influences you have previous considered foreign or alien. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): EVERY relationship has problems. No exceptions. In the beginning, all may be calm and bright, but eventually cracks will appear. Here’s the corollary to that rule: EVERY partner is imperfect. Regardless of how cool, kind, attractive, or smart they may seem in the early stages, they will eventually unveil their unique flaws and troubles. Does this mean that all togetherness is doomed? That it’s forever impossible to create satisfying unions? The answer is HELL, NO! —especially if you keep the following principles in mind: Choose a partner whose problems are: 1. interesting; 2. tolerable; 3. useful in prodding you to grow; 4. all of the above. Rob Brezsny is an aspiring master of curiosity, perpetrator of sacred uproar, and founder of the Beauty and Truth Lab. He brings a literate, myth-savvy perspective to his work. It’s all in the stars.




“Change of Key”

You’ll have to pick another one. ACROSS 1 Actor John of the “Harold and Kumar” movies 4 Boxer’s blows 8 Equipped for 14 Kurosawa’s adaptation of “King Lear” 15 Math class calculation 16 Situated 17 Protestant denom. founded in Philadelphia 18 Genre for bands like Wilco and Uncle Tupelo, in the wrong key? 20 Chess side 22 Bluish duck 23 Places for MDs and RNs 24 “Get Shorty” sequel 26 Hall of Famer Carew 28 “___ Boot” (1981 war film) 29 “You too?” a la Caesar 30 Villainous 33 “Why am ___? What does it all mean?” 35 Screw-shaped pasta 37 MTV cartoon with the show-within-a-show “Sick, Sad World” 38 Metallica hit, in the wrong key? 42 Looks at lewdly 43 Relate a story about 44 Go no further 45 Cookie with a Peepsflavored 2017 variety 46 Brats 50 “The Star-Spangled Banner” lyricist 51 “Neither snow, ___ rain ...” 53 Catch cunningly 55 “___ for Alibi” (Sue Grafton mystery) 56 Unwell 59 “The Jetsons” pet 60 “Runaway” singer, in the wrong key? 64 Meal starter? 65 “That makes sense” 66 “Eso ___” (Paul Anka hit) 67 Fuss 68 City where Canada’s

parliament meets 69 2.0 grades 70 Man cave, really DOWN 1 Early Tarzan actor Buster 2 “To be or not to be” soliloquist 3 Way shorter than 2-Down, say 4 The King of Pop, in tabloids 5 Aesthetic pursuit 6 “Doin’ the Pigeon” singer 7 Toyotathon, e.g. 8 Olympic speed skater ___ Anton Ohno 9 “Hit ‘Em Up Style (Oops!)” singer Cantrell 10 Office PC hookup 11 Outer skin layer 12 Homes for some lizards 13 Like an epic voyage 19 “Heaven Is a Place on Earth” singer Belinda 21 College catalog listings 25 “Dallas Buyers Club” actor Jared 27 “I ___ such thing!” 31 Melbourne is its capital 32 Comic book line artist 34 Got cranky 36 Jimmy who works with Lois Lane 38 Mixed-breed dog that sounds like a bird 39 Upper limit for a jungle gym, maybe 40 Lingerie item similar to a romper 41 Antiseptic gel source 47 Character in “The Wind in the Willows” 48 Victory celebration 49 Exactly correct 52 Ice Cube’s real first name 54 Small iPods 57 “Closing Bell” network 58 ACL’s location 61 Free ad, briefly 62 Fasten fabric 63 Verb suffix?

Copyright © 2017 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per3minute. Must be 18+ to call. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle No. 823



Fever Dreams Of A Chameleon God The weird and beautiful world of Torment: Tides of Numenera

Brandon Watson Pulse columnist


OLKS I CONFESS WRITING THIS column has been problematic. A year long relationship went away with a Willie Nelson song and lots of whiskey. But as I floated along Whiskey River I grabbed a life-raft and between bouts of self-loathing and blue poetry I found solace by embracing nostalgia with a new game from developer InXile. InXile has produced throwback RPGs with current-gen updates, games like Wasteland 2, Pillars of Eternity, and Divinity: Original Sin have been lovingly received with open arms by the gaming community. Truth be told these games are incredibly fun and addicting, added is a bit of nostalgia for the days of cranking up the 386 with VGA monitor that easily makes a person lose grip on time and space for hours. Many RPG gamers my age and older will remember the fun and frustration of long scripted games that required an active mind and an over-active imagination. Current generation RPGs of all kinds came from the text driven adventures of PC games during the 80s and 90s. In Torment: Tides of Numenera you play a recent “castoff” or ,specifically, an abandoned flesh-shell amnesiac of an immortal being known as The Changing God. An entity that sheds hosts every decade or so in order to beat the reaper and endure throughout the ages. A castoff is one of these hosts discarded by the chameleon

god. Taking place on Earth a billion years in the future amidst the amalgamated ruins of eight fallen civilizations, you start as a complete blank slate with no memories and no personality. Choices will shape and mold the long adventure before you and immediately you are thrown into character defining choices that establish class and combat style. It’s a creative way to pick the usual class of warrior, rogue, or mage by giving them different names of Glaive, Jack, or Nano respectively. Starting this game off is a bit disorienting, there are text hints to help guide you on the basic game mechanics such as combat and skill progression, but if you haven’t yet played slow-paced, isometric RPGs, then it may take you a while to get your mind right. Tides of Numenera is meant to induce feelings of confusion, wonder and a sense of the weird through its creative writing of dialogues, descriptive narratives, and thought bubbles. There isn’t much spoken dialogue among the NPCs and main characters allow the player to read and lend his or her own voice to the story. Some may find this tedious especially if they have been saturated with more straight forward action oriented games. But Tides takes a big step backward in the right direction focusing on context critical narratives that will pose many head scratching


choices that have real and lasting impacts on the gameplay and plotline. It’s a complex, fun and intriguing enough to keep you glued to the mouse and monitor for long chunks of time. What I like the most is the artstyle. Tides of Numenera gives you a rich and colorful mashup of steampunk, cyberpunk, and fantasy all fitting into this ridiculously insane fever dream of fandom. It’s like Dr. Who, Arthur C. Clarke, Isaac Asimov and Jules Verne had an amazingly gorgeous brain baby. Tides of Numenera will grab ahold and drag you into its world and even work its way into your thoughts the more you play and read into the subtle complexities of the entire universe within the game. When I was a young and impressionable gamer I built up my vocabulary and improved my reading literacy with games like Torment, Fallout and Balder’s Gate. It was reading the fantastic questlines,

dialogues and stories that put me on the path to become a writer at a very young age. For what Tides lacks in graphics or next gen fluff it more than makes up for it with some of the best creative storytelling I’ve ever experienced in a game for a long while. The concept of using death as a way to solve quests or even explore deeper into the story really gives the concept a unique feel along with the setting and story. Give Tides a shot to step away from the usual fare or taste some sweet nostalgia for a change. Or if you are facing existence forever alone, an interactive story full of intrigue, mystery and weird characters would be just what the doctor ordered to get you through and let you appreciate the creative side of life and of gaming. Brandon Watson has been on the gaming scene since first dropping coins in an arcade cabinet many moons ago. When not vaporizing zombies or leading space marines as a mousepad Mattis, he is making gourmet pancakes and promoting local artists.


The Pulse 14.11 » March 16, 2017  

Chattanooga's Weekly Alternative

The Pulse 14.11 » March 16, 2017  

Chattanooga's Weekly Alternative