LOCAL, INDEPENDENT NEWS, OPINION, ARTS AND ENTERTAINMENT WWW.BOISEWEEKLY.COM VOLUME 18, ISSUE 25 DECEMBER 16–22, 2009
TAK EE E ON E! NEWS 7
READY, SET, NO-GO Boise horse track negotiations haltered FEATURE 10
DON’T DIY Why self-publishers need a little help from their friends NOISE 29
BRINGIN’ IT HOME Why Curtis Stigers doesn’t mind not being mobbed SCREEN 33
NO. 1 FAN Patton Oswalt’s turn in Big Fan questions hero worship
“There’s nothing without the skiing.”
| DECEMBER 16–22, 2009 | BOISEweekly
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NOTE I’M GOING TO SAY THIS TWICE. First, I’ll say it in this week’s Note and, next week, I’ll repeat it just for good measure. Between noon on Wednesday, Dec. 23, and 9 a.m. on Monday, Jan. 4, 2010, Boise Weekly is going off the grid. You’ll still get your Boise Weekly every Wednesday, but this week and next, we’re working triple time to sew up the remaining editions of this year so that we can close up shop for a full seven business days. Those of you who’ve been around awhile know this is business as usual for us around the end of the year. It’s not a sign that we’ve gone under, been sold or just abandoned the old ofﬁce for a beach and a Bintang in Bali. Nope, nothing that cool. We simply lock up and quit answering phones, returning e-mails and eating three meals a day at our desks. We take a few days to get reacquainted with our homes and our better halves before beginning the new year. So, if you don’t hear from us during that time, don’t worry, we’ll get back to you after our vacation. In this week’s edition of Boise Weekly, you’ll read about Tamarack’s ghost-town feel in Rec and about a couple of longtime, long-loved people and places in Noise and Food. In Arts, you’ll have the privilege of a little more E.J. Pettinger than we usually give you each week. The creator of “Mild Abandon” is known to trade out his pithy illustrations for a longer written discourse from time to time, and we like to seize those moments whenever possible. This week’s feature, “Just Because You Can, Doesn’t Mean You Should ... Without Some Help,” by Amy Atkins has had me in intellectual ﬁts all week as I try to work out some comparison between the music and book industries. Musicians have established a well worn path around the big dogs with independent labels, and often that results in more authentic, higher quality music than the over-produced crap major labels sell us. Do writers have a similar option—something between a vanity press and a major publishing house? Despite the grey area small presses offer, I’m not convinced authors have the indie thing quite worked out. Though Atkins’ story has provided me with some answers, it’s left me with just as many questions. —Rachael Daigle
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ARTIST: Tyler Bowling TITLE: Fly by Night MEDIUM: Acrylic and airbrush
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Boise Weekly pays $150 as well as a $25 gift certificate to Boise Blue Art Supply for published covers. One stipulation of publication is that the piece must be donated to BW’s annual charity art auction in November. Proceeds from the auction are reinvested in the local arts community through a series of private grants for which all artists are eligible to apply. To submit your artwork for BW’s cover, bring it to BWHQ at 523 Broad St. Square formats are preferred and all mediums are accepted. Thirty days from your submission date, your work will be ready for pick up if it’s not chosen to be featured on the cover. Work not picked up within six weeks of submission will be discarded.
| DECEMBER 16–22, 2009 | 3
WWW.BOISEWEEKLY.COM What you missed this week in the digital world. GLENN LANDB ER G
WHO NEEDS A MOUNTAIN WHEN YOU HAVE A PARKING LOT? Parrilla Grill hosted its version of a snow dance last weekend: a rail jam in its parking lot. Competitors were towed in on a bungee and competed for cash prizes. Visit Cobweb for the winners, as well as photos and video of the show.
HELLO, IT’S BON JOVI. IS THIS THE UNIBOMBER? Jimmy Fallon and Jon Bon Jovi recently made a call to Boise on national television. All they got was voice mail and all Boise got was a unibomber comparison. Gee thanks, Bon Jovi. Check out the video at Cobweb.
GUV RACE GETS ANOTHER ONE A new Dem has entered the race for governor. In an email sent out to The Common Interest supporters, Keith Allred announced his candidacy for the state’s top ofﬁce. Read the memo at citydesk.
FUN ON THE CHEAP Had you been surﬁng boiseweekly.com last week, you would have discovered deals on entertainment: a free showing of the cult classic Forbidden Zone and $10 off Guy Fieri’s Morrison Center show. What will crop up this week?
| DECEMBER 16–22, 2009 | BOISEweekly
EDITOR’S NOTE BILL COPE TED RALL NEWS Horseracing’s future going in circles CITIZEN TRUE CRIME / MONDO GAGA FEATURE Self publishing: quality vs. vanity BW PICKS FIND 8 DAYS OUT SUDOKU NOISE Catching up with Curtis Stigers MUSIC GUIDE ARTS Idea as Art SCREEN Big Fan on the big screen MOVIE TIMES VIDIOT REC Ghost town Tamarack PLAY FOOD Jerry’s State Court Cafe version 2.0 WINE SIPPER CLASSIFIEDS HOME SWEET HOME NYT CROSSWORD FREEWILL ASTROLOGY
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150 YEARS OF READING A gift you can’t return
Read anything good this year? And before going any further, let us qualify what I mean by good reading. First, at least some small portion of the reading material must have actually been written by the person who claims to have written it. So Going Rogue doesn’t count. Also, the material cannot be one of those books purchased in bulk quantities and distributed by right-wing organizations so as to make it appear that Americans are ﬂocking to read it. Therefore, if you were ready to tell me you read something by Glenn Beck or Jonah Goldberg, save your breath. Lastly, I mean the word “good” here to deﬁne a more elevated standard for the written word, and further, to exclude whatever does not meet those standards. So, if you spent the year cuddled up with anything having to do with teenage vampires, frankly, I’m not interested. U Then let me ask again: Read anything good this year? I have. I sure have. In fact, I’ve probably read—and delighted in—more good stuff this year than I have during any previous year of my life. It all started a week or two before the Inauguration. If you remember, at the time, there was a great deal of comparison between Barack Obama and Abe Lincoln. I appreciated the spirit of these comparisons, if not some of the trivial nature they came wrapped in. I felt—still feel—a most signiﬁcant circle was about to close on Jan. 20. A circle 150 years wide, 150 years deep, into which most of American history and culture and heart and anguish and joy would ﬁt. So more out of sentimentality than anything else, I decided to re-read something I hadn’t seen since my college days. It was written by one of Lincoln’s most ardent admirers on the occasion of that great man’s murder—“When Lilacs Last in the Dooryard Bloom’d.” I’ve kept all my old text books—ﬁgured they’d come in handy sooner or later—and I remembered the piece being in my anthology of American literature (The Norton Anthology, Vol. II, should you care). Most of you will recognize it as a poem written by Walt Whitman, one of the originals in a noble line of American writers and arguably, to this day, the most exuberant soul in that heritage. Whitman was a homosexual. A great, lusty bear of a homosexual. I didn’t know about this when I read his poetry 40-plus years ago. My American lit. professor probably knew, but he didn’t bring it up while discussing Whitman’s work. Even as wild as things were on college campuses in 1967, some roads were more prudently left untaken. Once I had ﬁnished “When Lilacs ...,” and since I had the book out anyway, I went ahead and re-read all of the Whitman WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M
material the anthology provided. “Leaves of Grass.” “Song of Myself.” “Crossing Brooklyn Ferry.” Twenty or 30 poems in all. Somewhere during the re-reading, I realized it would have been helpful—crucial, even—to me as a 19-year-old kid to know Whitman was a homosexual. It would have added a depth of emotional texture to his poems I didn’t get, back in ’67. It would have expanded my understanding of an American giant and his own understanding of America, and it might even have germinated a tolerance that had yet to come to me, back in ’67. I ﬁnished all of the available Whitman and decided to keep reading. After all, the Norton Anthology (third edition) is more than 1,700 pages of ﬁne print. I’d only wiped the ﬁrst layer of dust from the mirror. I have to admit, I’d never had much use for Emily Dickinson. My memory of her was that she was a fussy old maid, picking over the smaller potatoes in rhyme. My shallow young mind marginalized her, poor lady. She in no way deserved the disdain some snotty student would hold for her some 100 years later. And now, having re-read Dickinson 40-some years later on, I hold a certain, unmistakable disdain for that snotty student. Now, having added those 40 years to my own experience, I can think of Emily not only as an exquisite songstress of the most fragile of human experiences, but I can remember she wasn’t even allowed to vote in her day. That she and every other woman of the age were considered less than fully realized and treated accordingly. Little wonder her poetry murmurs instead of bellows like Whitman’s. Dickinson, Lanier, Harte, Joel Chandler Harris, and I kept reading. Ante-bellum, post-bellum, and then Samuel Clemens. Such a revisited treat was Samuel Clemens. “The Man Who Corrupted Hadleyburg.” Life of the Mississippi. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, in its entirety. It’s possible that you, at some point in your education, were assigned to read Huckleberry Finn. If you’re indigenous to Idaho and close to my age, it’s possible Jim was the ﬁrst black man you got to know, ﬁctionally or really. It’s possible that it was Jim who planted that ﬁrst seed of racial awareness in your young skull. It’s even possible you supported—maybe even participated in—what King and Evers and those three boys in Mississippi died for, with Huck’s friend Jim whispering in your young ear. I didn’t appreciate these possibilities until just this last year because I’d forgotten I’d ever read Huckleberry Finn. I knew about the river, I knew about the raft, I knew about Jim. But I’d forgotten what it was about. It was like I was seeing one of America’s most familiar landscapes for the ﬁrst time. And I was. Next week, in Part Two, I’ll explain how this could be.
| DECEMBER 16–22, 2009 | 5
WE’RE STILL DOOMED The empty gesture of Copenhagen
NEW YORK—Our parents and grandparents fell down on the job. “The politicians in Copenhagen have the power to shape history’s judgment on this generation: one that saw a challenge and rose to it, or one so stupid that we saw calamity coming but did nothing to avert it.” A concise summary of how the world sees this week’s United Nations climate change conference, courtesy of the editorial board of the United Kingdom newspaper The Guardian. The paper continued: “In scientiﬁc journals, the question is no longer whether humans are to blame, but how little time we have got left to limit the damage,” wrote the Guardian’s editors. The implication is that time is short, that there’s still time to stave off environmental disaster. “Quietly in public, loudly in private, climate scientists everywhere are saying the same thing: It’s over,” reported George Monblot in the Guardian from Copenhagen. “The years in which more than 2 degrees C [above average temperatures at the start of the Industrial Revolution] of global warming could have been prevented have passed, the opportunities squandered by denial and delay. On current trajectories, we’ll be lucky to get away with 4 degrees C. Mitigation [limiting greenhouse gas pollution] has failed; now we must adapt to what nature sends our way. If we can.” Leading scientists like James Hansen say the maximum safe upper level for the concentration of CO2 particles in air is 350 parts per million. We’re currently at 387. According to a study recently cited in Time magazine, we could ban automobiles and the internal combustion engine and abolish all industrial
| DECEMBER 16–22, 2009 | BOISEweekly
production, worldwide, and it would still take at least 900 years for CO2 levels to drop back below the 350 ppm tipping point. Ocean levels will rise an average of at least 6 to 16 feet by 2100. The northern half of Antarctica’s giant Wilkins ice shelf has begun breaking off; it will be gone within a few years. In the highest mountains in and around the Himalayas, millennia-old glaciers have vanished in the last decade, causing water shortages for hundreds of millions of people in the cities of China, Central and South Asia. “People have imagined that if we stopped emitting carbon dioxide that the climate would go back to normal in 100 years or 200 years,” said Susan Solomon, a climate scientist with the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration. “What we’re showing here is that’s not right. It’s essentially an irreversible change that will last for more than 1,000 years.” The idyllic global climate that has prevailed for the last 10,000 years is changing. Catastrophe no longer looms, it’s upon us. For example, the polar ice cap is doomed. Summer ice will vanish within 20 years; winter ice will be gone by 2085. Nothing can be done to stop it. It doesn’t matter whether the United States and other countries reduce CO2 gas production by 30, 50 or 80 percent. The ice sheets are going. Thousands of animal species will live in zoos or not at all. Giant storms will rage, famine will spread, drought will be ubiquitous. It is almost certainly too late to save ourselves. Recycling and reducing CO2 output amounts to mere politeness. It’s a nice gesture. But it won’t make any difference.
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HORSE RACING OFF TRACK New operator at odds with Boise horse owners ERIC LEINS did not get awarded the lease, and there is no ulterior motive going on here.” Elison said he is willing to wait, too, especially since he can race his horses in places like Prescott, Ariz., for more money than he would make under an Idaho Entertainment contract.
insist they need—to prepare for live racing. “The problem is Eric Spector is a businessman. His business is gaming. Our business is horses. He wants all the money and all the control,” said Elison. Stubbs makes no apologies for business
Depending on whom you ask, the prospects for horse racing at Idaho Downs (formerly Les Bois Park) are either slim to none or just a handshake away from becoming a reality. But ﬁve months after Ada County awarded the rights to operate Boise’s racetrack to Idaho Entertainment, the company remains stuck in negotiations with a local horsemen’s group that must agree to a contract before the state can issue a license for live horse racing. The live-racing license is necessary to get a similar license for simulcast racing, so no racing events of any kind are ﬁguring into the future of Idaho Downs any time soon. In a November letter to the Idaho State Racing Commission, Idaho Entertainment president Eric Spector wrote that his company is “prudently seeking other forms of entertainment and uses of our facilities at Expo Idaho.” Spector did not return phone calls from Boise Weekly, but according to Idaho Entertainment owner T. Pat Stubbs, the racetrack that has been home to horse racing since the 1970s could soon be used for concerts. Horse owners are not happy with that plan. “The lease does not provide for doing concerts. The county should consider Eric Spector to be in default of the lease. They should terminate the lease and invite others who are interested to step forward,” said Tim Elison, a member of the board of directors for the Idaho Horsemen’s Benevolent and Protective Association, the group that is negotiating with Idaho Entertainment. If you talk to Elison, Idaho Entertainment and the Idaho HBPA remain far apart on reaching any agreement soon—23 contested issues away, to be exact. But for Stubbs, who says he remains committed to bringing live horse racing to Boise, the two parties “are far closer to an agreement than the HBPA wants to admit.” “These are not people who are operating in good faith,” said Stubbs. “This is not an impasse. This is a ﬂat out boycott.” Stubbs calls it a boycott because he questions whether the HBPA has always had aims to work with an operator other than Idaho Entertainment. He points to a Boise Weekly article from June in which a member of the HBPA spoke about the Greene Group, a Coeur d’Alene-based racetrack operator, as the best solution for horsemen. “We made a major error in our research,” said Stubbs. “We had no idea we’d be dealing with a boycott from day one.” Tom Dougherty, the HBPA member who made the comment about the Greene Group in the June Boise Weekly, is adamant that there is no boycott at play. “Idaho Entertainment’s assessment of that comment is completely false,” said Dougherty. “I was commenting on if the Greene Group was being awarded the lease, but they
The horse stalls at Idaho Downs, sans horses.
As far as the contract is concerned, Elison says a major sticking point is how the purse money gets divided between the Idaho HBPA and Idaho Entertainment. Essentially, out of every dollar bet, 80 cents goes back to winning bettors. The remaining 20 cents, called the take out, gets split between the horsemen and the operator. According to Elison, the speciﬁc percentages of the take out have been settled, but in the last contract put forth by Idaho Entertainment, there was a caveat no horseman could live with—the take out would be on net revenue as opposed to gross revenue. This means that the horsemen’s share of the purse would be doled out to them minus a variety of Idaho Entertainment operating expenses. “It’s like writing them a blank check,” Elison said, adding that across the country, horsemen can earn bottom purses of $2,300 to $2,400. But under an Idaho Entertainment contract, those purses would drop to about $1,000. “You can’t afford to stay in Boise for $1,000 purses,” he said. The two parties also are at odds over the number of live racing days that would be held at Idaho Downs, as well as the number of training days the horsemen want—and
acumen, especially in a downturned economy where wagering is lackluster. He points out that Capitol Racing, the former racetrack operator in Boise, lost roughly $1 million in 2008. Elison estimates that the absence of horse racing in Boise forfeits a positive $40 million economic impact on the Treasure Valley. It’s a ﬁgure that Ada County Commissioner Sharon Ullman wishes would bring more urgency to the negotiations. In her Nov. 13 blog post, Ullman offered to help mediate between the horsemen and the operator, but so far no one has taken her up on the offer, she said. Ullman is critical of the state law, which she said requires the racetrack operator to negotiate a contract speciﬁcally with the Idaho HBPA and no other equine organization. She also expressed concern over the state requirement that there be 46 days of live racing at Idaho racetracks. “To me, that’s a problem. That’s too much government regulation. These are business owners who need to operate their business,” Ullman said. “Maybe it’s time to look at the current code because I don’t know if horse racing in Idaho can work the way things stand now.”
DEMS FLOAT GUV CANDIDATE Idaho’s 2010 governor’s race, which was already shaping up to be a doozie, got a bit more interesting last week with the entry of a viable and surprising Democrat. Kieth Allred, who has spent the past half-decade building a bipartisan coalition of policy wonks across the state, signed on with Idaho Democrats to challenge Gov. C. L. “Butch” Otter—should he emerge from the May Republican primary. Speaking of the primary, recall that Ada County Commissioner Sharon Ullman is seeking her party’s nomination and that Otter has not begun to campaign actively. Also in the GOP fray, jokester Pete Peterson, who tells citydesk he will stop campaigning after the New Year because people all over the world will have already downloaded his “PETE” yard signs. A guy named Lee Chaney has said he’ll run as a Democrat, though his Web site does not portray him as one. But the race has also drawn independent contenders, primarily former GOP State Rep. Jana Kemp, actively campaigning for months now. But also now-perennial candidate and largeanimal veterinarian Rex Rammell, actively campaigning for years now. Oh, and ProLife—the man, not the issue. Enter Allred, who has plenty of name and rep among Idaho’s political class, on both sides of the aisle. Allred is mainly an academic, who started his public speaking career at Twin Falls High School. He returns there this week to announce his candidacy. Allred, who can claim academic appointments at Harvard, Oxford and ... Boise State, runs a group called The Common Interest, which produces consensus policy brieﬁngs on the issues of the day in Idaho. The group’s research has even drawn praise from Otter, who called it, “a wellresearched, facts-based voice of reason,” adding that he may not always agree with the group’s conclusions. So why is Allred running for governor, and why as a Democrat? In a letter to Common Interest supporters, Allred explained that Democratic talent searcher Betty Richardson came to him (and, of course, his wife) making it clear that they were not seeking an overtly partisan candidate. “She assured us that her expectation was that I would campaign and govern just as I had led The Common Interest ... the party wanted to embrace that approach,” Allred said. Allred believes in his process of making laws—gathering facts, discussing options and coming to consensus. And he has designs on the Republic: “We realized that it would be the most powerful route available to advance the vision of making The Common Interest a potent force in all 50 states and at the federal level by the time of our nation’s 250th anniversary,” Allred continued in his letter. —Nathaniel Hoffman Allred’s tight jeans.
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| DECEMBER 16–22, 2009 | 7
JERMS LANNINGHAM Drawing out the citizen drawer TARA MORGAN
How long have you been illustrating for Citizen? I think it started in 2006, I could be wrong. I’ve done so many of them; it’s just been a whirlwind ... I started with spot illustrations and then moved into Citizen Boise. Had you illustrated from photographs before drawing Citizen? In high school we did it a little bit; our art teacher would make us draw National Geographic things. And then there was this group of us in the back … some of us were drawing skulls and people with their heads cut off … We were the kids who probably weren’t going to succeed in life. But all those people I know that sat in that back area, they’re still creative ... Some of them own huge, fancy design ﬁrms. Describe your illustration style. I don’t think I’m all that terribly good at drawing people. I just draw them and then spin it enough until I think that they’re cool and sketchy and fun … I do them really fast, and if I don’t like them, I’ll do them really fast again … Drawing people realistically really isn’t my style, but it’s kind of become that. You keep your licks, so to speak … Garﬁeld, back in the day, he was this really chubby cat, then he kinda got skinny and
| DECEMBER 16–22, 2009 | BOISEweekly
then his head stayed big. So, I looked back through all my drawings—there was like 80 of them—and the style has changed a little bit. What’s your process like, how do you tackle the photos? I print it out on the printer and make them big or small. Then I put them on a light table and I blue line them out a little bit … Back in the day, if someone had a bigger nose or bigger ears or you wanted to accentuate a feature, you could do that. You try to make them as cool-looking as possible—not too old—and if it’s a gal, you wanna make her look pretty. You don’t want to mess with people’s teeth. It’s a ﬁne line because the very ﬁrst one that I did was Margaret at Hollywood Market, and I drew her in my more caricature style. I guess some people got really torqued. She kind of has these little jowls, because she’s older, that hang down—laugh lines and jowls. I just made her look kind of pissed and grumpy—she kind of is—so I added some character to her. [BW art director Leila Ramella-Rader] was like, “You can’t draw ladies like that anymore.” What are some of the more difﬁcult aspects of drawing people? I think I have trouble doing people’s eyes and their laugh lines and their crow’s feet … sometimes people have big foreheads and you wanna ﬁx stuff when you’re drawing because we want things to look pretty. There’s some people that just aren’t all that pretty, but you have to draw them how they are. Some people have big noses, some people have big ears. So when you ﬁnish with some of these pieces, you’re just like, “That’s just how they are.”
JER EM Y LANNINGHAM
Jeremy “Jerms” Lanningham is a straightup nice dude. A graphic designer, illustrator, gallery curator, skateboarder, husband and father of two little girls, Lanningham leads a packed life. And for the last few years, he’s illustrated every Citizen that has graced the pages of Boise Weekly. This week, we decided to pull a Charlie Kaufman and turn the spotlight on him. What’s the story of the citizen behind the Citizen illustrations?
That’s a hard line to walk: making sure that you make people look their best while staying truthful to their actual attributes … A lot of it depends on the photo, also. If the lighting is horrible and they’re wearing a hat, you can’t really see their eyes, you have to put shadows in. Different ethnicities—if someone’s African American or Hispanic or Native American—in a little black and white drawing, how do you do that? More hatch marks? But hatch marks make someone look old and then you have to accentuate the eyes a little bit more. It seems like a lot of times you get to know just as much about the person by looking at your drawing as you do by reading the text. Completely. It stops people and gets people’s attention, the way it’s placed on the page … So many people who have been interviewed do some really cool and moving things for people or the world in general or the environment … I’m just the guy that draws them. How are you going to tackle your own Citizen drawing? I might have my daughter Maya do it with a crayon. A big circle with ears … That might set her up for a similar life. More Jerms at boiseweekly.com.
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TRUE CRIME/NEWS ‘ACTING CRAZY’ EARNS BOISE MAN TASER CHARGE The collision at Ninth and Main streets got called into Boise Police dispatch at about 11:45 p.m. on Dec. 10. Ofﬁcers arrived shortly thereafter, but one of the drivers was nowhere to be found. Witnesses told the cops he had hotfooted it from the scene. Ofﬁcers searching the area caught sight of the suspect. He evidently caught sight of them, too, because he took off running. After a brief chase, cops cornered their man in an alley. Our suspect tried to delay the inevitable by brandishing a broken glass bottle. After refusing to drop his weapon, the reluctant arrestee was introduced to Mr. Taser. Making this shocking acquaintance produced a calming effect on the 21-year-old Boise man. He was taken into custody without further ado. Turns out the broken glass bottle had been the property of an area bar, where the accused ﬂeeing driver had made a post-collision stop. Witnesses and victims later told investigators that the suspect was “acting crazy” when he entered the watering hole on the 900 block of Main Street. During a confrontation with a bar employee, the man allegedly made direct threats and refused to allow the worker to leave the room. Then the suspect retrieved a bottle of booze. He proceeded to break the bottle and use its jagged remains to make more threats, bar workers told police. A struggle ensued. But the suspect escaped, taking the movie-cliche weapon with him, only to meet up with his destiny in that dark, cold alley. All in all, the just-barely-legal man faces one felony charge—aggravated assault—along with ﬁve misdemeanors: second-degree kidnapping, malicious injur y to property, resisting
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and obstructing, driving under the inﬂuence and, last but not least, leaving the scene of an accident. Speaking of which, ofﬁcers determined the suspect may have been under the inﬂuence when the collision occurred, so he was also treated to a needle poke to draw blood for evidentiary testing. What’s more, when Ada County Sheriff’s Ofﬁce ofﬁcials learned of his arrest, they took the opportunity to ser ve the young gentleman with an agent’s warrant for a probation violation. Sounds like somebody just got crossed off Santa’s “nice” list.
PROPERTY OWNER FOILS BRAZEN MID-MORNING GRAND THEFT And this week’s BW Criminal Cojones Award goes to two Boise men in their mid-40s for thinking they could get away with grand theft in broad daylight. The pair wound up behind bars after a property owner on the 5900 block of North Willow Cliff Way reported a theft in progress to Boise Police at about 10:30 a.m. on Dec. 9. He told ofﬁcers he saw two suspects drive onto his property, back up to his motorcycle trailer—which just happened to contain the man’s motorcycle—hook it to their pickup and drive off. Since they were more or less caught in the act by the eagle-eyed property owner, the two alleged bike heisters were still in the neighborhood when cops brought their misadventure to an end. The stolen property was recovered and the pair was booked into the county clink on a felony grand-theft charge apiece. Without any broken bottles being waved about. —Jay Vail
| DECEMBER 16–22, 2009 | 9
*534 "%#!53% 9/5 #!.