L ove F est CELEBRATION The Chicago Black Gay Men’s Caucus (CBGMC), will host its 8th Annual LoveFest Celebration on Sunday, Aug. 26 beginning at noon in Jackson Park (63rd & Cornell Drive). A free event, LoveFest is an annual summer “edu-tainment” festival designed for the African-American LGBT community, more specifically gay and bisexual men, to bring awareness to health and wellness management with live entertainment, dancing, health screenings and physical fitness activities. LoveFest, which attracts more than 500 attendees each year, serves as the official launch of CBGMC’s “Healthy Is Sexy” (HIS) Lifestyle Campaign. Attendees will be able to enjoy a variety of physical activities in the park including yoga, physical challenge obstacle courses, kickboxing, and volleyball. “It’s important that we continue to provide positive affirming environments where black gay and bisexual men can come together and have access to health services,” said Craig Johnson, interim chair of the CBGMC executive planning commission (EPC). “This festival is an opportunity for the Chicago Black Gay Men’s Caucus to communicate to the Black MSM population the importance of taking control of their health and that with our [CBGMC] assistance we can change the overall health landscape for our community.” Legendary dance diva Crystal Waters and Chicago’s very own Cyon Flare are the event’s featured entertainers. In addition, LoveFest will host the Old School vs. New School Battle of the DJs, and the EGOmania Mini-Ball. For more information about LoveFest, go to www.chiblackgaucaucus.org or contact CBGMC at email@example.com. boi
FALL FASHION, ACCESSORIES & HAIR
3700 N. Halsted St. #2-S Chicago, IL 60613
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Photographers _________________________ Oliver Aguilar Eamonn Sexton Steve Starr Cover: Dining Out For Life
Editorial Contributors ___________________ Harry Taint Anita Taylor
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ACCESSORIES ARE NECESSITIES ACCESSORIES (CONTINUED) MORE ACCESSORIES EVEN MORE ACCESSORIES boi’s best restaurants SPOTLIGHT: ISRAEL WRIGHT in the know, on the go! ask ace bars and clubs directory
09 10 12 14 17 22 25 29 30
ACCESSORIES ARE NECESSITIES By Anita Taylor It’s been said that the best accessory a man can have is a good-looking date on his arm. While a good looking date, male or female, is always a bonus, true fashionistas know that accessories are the icing on the cake of a well baked… Damn! I had a good metaphor going there but it just got away from me. In past issues we’ve discussed the basic rules of fashion, pieces every man needs in his wardrobe and how to build a classic wardrobe. Accessories are an important component of every man’s wardrobe. Accessories fall into two basic categories, those you use every day and those that are seasonal. Hats, gloves, boots and scarves are all seasonal accessories, as are (depending on your locale) sunglasses. Let’s start with a look at business/formal accessories. When it comes to business wear, the only pieces of jewelry that are acceptable are a watch and wedding ring. If wearing a shirt with French cuffs, cuff links, and perhaps a tie bar, may be worn. Other than that, you’re adding too much for a work environment. Bracelets, earrings, pinky rings, etc. are not business attire. If you choose to wear any other jewelry or personal adornments (piercings, etc.) they should not be visible. Other business wear accessories can include hats, socks, belts, shoes, ties, sunglasses, pocket squares, wallet and man bags. The general rule of thumb is that no one aspect of your look should draw attention, every item you wear should seem organic to your look. See the “Common Accessory Confusions” guide for specifics. Let’s look at the common accessories you might wear/use on a regular basis. I always find that it is best to start at the top and work your way down, whether it comes to fashion or… but I digress. Herschel supplies backpacks and bags that are modern in shape with loads of crafted detail. Available at CRAM Fashion
The summer sun is fading quickly so you’d better get hold of this seasons must have shades! The latest Henry Holland x Le Specs line is comprehensively tested and comply with strict Australian and International standards for sunglasses comes with a one year warranty against all manufacturing defaults. Available at The Silver Room. (Continued on Next Page) boi
ACCESSORIES ARE NECESSITIES Hats
Unless you are English or French do not attempt a bowler or beret. Okay, Sally Bowles got away with it at the Kit Kat Club, but most people just look foolish in either of these headpieces. If you choose to wear a hat for fashion’s sake, stick with a fedora. The classic felt fedora will take you through most of the year in Chicago, switch to a straw version for the summer months. Choose a neutral color unless you plan to have a collection of hats for various outfits. Keep in mind that Chicago’s windy atmosphere makes wearing a hat a challenge. If you choose to wear a hat on a regular basis, take the time to learn hat etiquette. You no longer have to doff your chapeau to every lady you pass on the street, but you should not wear a hat indoors, especially while dining. Hats for fashion’s sake are one thing, but here in Chicago we must also wear hats to cope with the weather. A close-fitting knit hat is always acceptable and on extremely cold days a necessity, especially for the follicallychallenged. It has become acceptable to wear a knit hat throughout the day. If you prefer not to mess your do, earmuffs or headbands are an alternative, although these should be removed as soon as you are indoors. Baseball caps are a classic addition to any man’s casual wardrobe. Casual being the operative word here; they are appropriate for outdoor activities and should always be worn with the brim slightly curved and facing forward. Wearing a hat cocked to the side is only appropriate if you are either a member of a street gang or boy band. If you choose to wear a cap backwards, you should also choose to stay at home. 10 boi
Gant sweater, original Penguin shirt, dl1961 jeans and caterpillar boots make for a perfect casual look. Available at Akira men’s stores in Bucktown or Andersonville.
Sometimes a little bling is called for, such this Gavinni sterling silver bracelet from Moda in Andersonville.
G-Star’s “Dean” travel bag is made entirely out of raw denim, a specialty at G-Star. The bag’s two side pockets, two handles and large capacity makes it ideal for travel or the gym. A shoulder strap offers versatility. $290 at G-Star. (Continued on Page 12)
ACCESSORIES ARE NECESSITIES Sunglasses
A classic pair of aviator frames can serve all year long. Whether blocking the sun’s rays at the beach or from reflected snow, sunglasses serve to protect the eyes and help to reduce crow’s feet resulting from squinting. Again, remove your sunglasses as soon as you are indoors. During the summer you may push the sunglasses to the top of your head as a sort of headband, but you should never put them on backwards (uh, Guy Fieri, a fashion mess from head to toe) or hang them from cords around your neck. If you prefer to tuck them away, invest in a nice eyeglass case that fits snugly in your pocket or man bag.
Other than in cold weather, scarves are merely an affectation. Wear as you see fit, but keep the material and color in sync with the weather. Very few men can carry off a scarf as strictly fashion. If in doubt, don’t. During colder weather scarves are a necessity. Go for high quality fabrics such as cashmere or merino wool. Wrap the scarf around your neck and cross it in a V under your coat. The long, wrap-around style is only for very casual wear or if your name is Waldo.
We don’t often think of underwear as an accessory, but, of course, it is. Great underwear can give you a sense of confidence as well as comfort, not to mention that right lift can make those slacks look even better. A new Japanese underwear brand, STUD is designed with today’s contemporary man and his active lifestyle in mind. Available in Chicago only at Egoist.
Should be silk and be placed in the front breast pocket of a suit jacket, with a simple triangle fold, point facing up. The effect should be understated, never flouncy, garish or contrived.
While gloves are no longer worn for everyday, you should consider at least two pairs, work or dress gloves in leather or knitted with cashmere lining, and a more casual pair for daily use in colder climes. Consider a pair of “Smart” gloves that allow you to operate touchpads without have to remove your gloves. 12 boi
For something casual, check out the hand-woven friendship bracelets available at Ragstock.
HEX’s Core Case for iPhone 4S is slim and ruggedly stylish�with a unique waxed canvas-wrapped exterior that cleverly protects your iPhone, from CRAM on Broadway in Lakeview.
GAnt knitted cap in mustard, one of the season’s hot colors, tops of a combo of Gant shirt and sweater available at Akira ‘‘s Bucktown and Andersonville locations.
One word, “No!” Unless you are under 25 or Latino, in that case, bring out the bling!
Belts & Suspenders
If your pants have belt loops, wear a belt. The belt should match or coordinate with your shoes; the buckle should be understated for business wear, but can be a bit more flamboyant for casual wear. If you have any sort of excess belly fat, avoid wearing a large belt buckle, it just draws attention to the area. If you choose to wear suspenders, you may do so, if the pants have button fasteners. Do not use the clip on type of suspenders unless you are so rotund that a belt will not hold up your pants.
Match your socks to your slacks, not your shoes. For example, if you’re wearing tan dress pants with black shoes, opt for tan or beige dress socks instead of black ones. In any case,
keep those thick white tube socks in the gym bag where they belong. When it comes to dress pants and shoes, stick with a thin material in solid or subtle patterns. For casual wear, cotton knit socks are a good bet. Stick with neutral colors, such as black, gray, brown, or beige under longer pants. When wearing shorts and athletic shoes, wear socklets that stop below the shoe line. Either black or white are acceptable depending on the shoe’s cut and color.
Dressy outfits require dress shoes, brogues and wing-tips, are traditional, but many men now opt for dressy “loafers” with business wear. With casual wear, almost anything goes as long as the shoes are clean and in good shape. Don’t wear sandals unless your feet are impeccably manicured and never wear socks with sandals. Anita Taylor is a celebrity stylist, fashion writer, personal shopper and hash house waitress. She attended Parsons New School, Radcliff and Mr. Lance’s College of Cosmetology. (Continued on Next Page)
ACCESSORIES ARE NECESSITIES Man Bags
It used to be that the only acceptable man bag was a briefcase. Now that many men carry a number of electronic items with them, the fashionable options have expanded. A messenger bag is a good option and available in materials from dressy black leather to casual canvas, nylon or even rubber. Backpacks, while not suggested for business wear, neednâ€™t make you look as if youâ€™re setting off on a camping trip.
Wallet & Money Clip
A classic leather wallet or an understated money clip is a matter of personal preference. With so many of us carrying plastic instead of cash nowadays, a wallet often is a better option. In either case, you should have two, a business or dress wallet is usually made from leather. A casual wallet, constructed of canvas, plastic, leather or whatever is great for everyday use and helps keep your dress wallet in better shape.
A closely rolled cuff on these dl1961 jeans shows off the caterpillar boots, available at Akira in Bucktown or Andersonville.
Sunglasses not only offer protection from the elements year round, but they can add panache to your style such as these from Windward Boardshop in Lakeview. 14 boi
A great watch is always in style, such as this gold and black Dogati watch, stainless steel, water resistant $available at Moda in Andersonville.
BOI’S BEST RESTAURANTS AMERICAN___________
Ann Sather 929 W. Belmont 773.348.2378.
5207 N Clark 773.271.6627 & 3411 N Broadway 773.305.0024. These bustling hot spots, serving traditional Swedish pancake house fare, are best known for hearty fare and delish cinnamon rolls.
The Bagel 3107 N. Broadway 773.477.0300
The quintessential Jewish style deli is the perfect spot for a corned beef or pastrami sandwich, some chicken soup, lox and bagels or a full dinner that tastes as if someone’s Jewish momma made it.
Chicago Diner 3411 N. Halsted 773.935.6696
This world famous vegetarian restaurant offers vegan and organic offerings. Organic beers, wine, and spirits are also available.
Clark Street Dog 3040 N. Clark 773.281-6690. Open until four in the morning and serving up all the deliciousness you can imagine after you leave the bar.
Crew 4804 N. Broadway 773.784.2739. More than just a sports bar, the menu includes a variety of hamburgers, sandwiches, salads & comfort food.
Golden Nugget Family Restaurants
2406 W. Diversey 773.252.8903. 1765 W. Lawrence 773.769.6700. A great option for after bar dining as they are all open 24-7, and have free parking. The large menu is sure to please, especially the classic breakfast and hearty dinners. Everything is housemade, known for fluffy buttermilk pancakes,
Halsted’s Bar & Grill 3441 N. Halsted
773.348.9696 This Boystown eatery serves up a wide array of tasty appetizers, burgers, sandwiches, and popular comfort food items at very reasonable prices in a fun and inviting atmosphere. Beers on tap are aplenty and the weekend brunch draws an attractive crowd.
Hamburger Mary’s 5400 N. Clark
773.784.6969. “Eat, Drink and be... MARY” at this fun and popular Andersonville restaurant which features a wide array of burgers and sandwiches, along with an interesting selection of tasty appetizers. Wash it all down with one of Mary’s home-brewed ales.
Horizon Café 3805 N. Broadway 773.883.1565.
This long-time popular Lakeview family restaurant serves up big portions of creative homestyle dishes as well as healthy fare (broth-based soups and whole wheat tortilla wraps) and at affordable prices. Breakfast served all day long. Delivery available.
IHOP 3760 N. Halsted 773.296.0048. More than a
pancake house, this 24-hour Boystown institution serves up affordably priced appetizers, sandwiches, and entrees that are sure to satisfy varying after-bar wants and needs.
Jury’s 4337 N. Lincoln 773.935.2255. Watch all the
poplular sports at this friendly neighborhood sports bar. Known for their killer burgers. They offer a late night menu along with daily specials and even brunch on Sundays.
Kit Kat Lounge 3700 N. Halsted 773.525.1111.
Providing the best of diva entertainment along with a full dinner menu, they offer ½-price cocktails and Buy 1 Get 1 Free Entree on Wednesdays.. On Monday nights get 50% off your entire bill.
Nookies Tree 3334 N. Halsted 773.248.9888 and Nookies Edgewater1100 W. Bryn Mawr 773.5164188. A regular haunt for the locals of Boystown (also Edgewater) and popular with hangover recoverees, the diner serves made-to-order omelets, pancakes, waffles and other brunch fare all day. And it’s open 24 hours on weekends.
Melrose 3233 N Broadway 773.327.2060. This
Lakeview institution has been catering to the after-bar crowds for decades, serving breakfast anytime along with typical diner fare. Open 24 hours
Philly’s Best 907 W. Belmont 773.525.7900.
Authentic Philly cheese steak sandwich. Their meat is brought directly from Philadelphia. Also, medium crust pizza, oven baked grinders & fresh salads.
Pie Hole Pizza 3477 N. Broadway 773.525.8888. Their “hole” is open Sunday-Thursday from 11ammidnight and Friday & Saturday until 3am. Grab it and go or have it delivered.. your pizza, that is!! Rainbow Pizza 3450 N. Halsted . Serving up pizza
by the slice. Open late nights Wed.-Sat. and cater to the hoards on Halsted looking for a quick bite to eat.
Stella’s Diner 3042 N. Broadway 773.472.9040.
Friendly staff serve up delicious diner fare, such as; fresh salads, a large selection of wraps, sandwiches, hearty entrees, pastas, and homemade desert
The Edge 2720 N. Clark St 773.929-7024. A bar and grill serving breakfast, steaks, seafood, ribs, with a full bar until 2am. Free parking lot and open 24hrs.
Wilde Bar & Restaurant 3130 N. Broadway
773.244.0404. This cozy upscale Irish pub offers a laid back and warm atmosphere and a wide ranging menu that is sure to please. Expect updated versions of pub favorites such as chicken pot pie, meatloaf, fish & chips, burgers and salads. boi 17
BOI’S BEST RESTAURANTS ASIAN__________________
Ba Le 5014 N. Broadway 773.561.4424. The
Andies 1467 W. Montrose 773.348.0654. 5253 N
original and still the best bahn mi sandwich in town. In addition to the traditional style, there are a number of vegetarian options. The bright clean dining area is inviting and the staff is eager to explain all your options.
Dragon Lady Lounge 3188 N. Elston
773.267.1970 Serving Korean-Latin fusion dishes from delicious fresh Bi Bim Bop and Kim Chi Veggie burgers, to delicious tofu tacos and beef Kim Chi burgers. ITALIAN_________________
Anna Maria Pasteria 4400 N. Clark
773.506.2662. Owned by sisters who hail from the Basilicata region of southern Italy, this neighborhood gem creates homemade modern and traditional Italian dishes that are authentic, delicious & inexpensive.
Angelina Ristorante 3561 N. Broadway
773.935.5933. Hosting the coolest and hippest Sunday brunch crowd in Lakeview, the menu includes Eggs Benedict, fritattas, Croque Monsieur and mufaletta sandwiches, almond-crusted stuffed French toast, and the free flow of Champagne mimosas. Brunch here is loud, raucous and FUN! Great for dinner, as well.
Club Lucky 1824 W. Wabansia Ave. 773.227.2300. Popular Bucktown/Wicker Pk. restaurant & unique cocktail lounge. Generous portions of traditional Italian specialties and daily specials. Outdoor patio.
Clark 773.784.8616. Specializing in Mediterranean and vegetarian cuisine, specialties of the house include steak kabobs, gyros, and poultry dishes such as Greek Chicken and Lebanese Style Chicken Kefta Kabob. And as befits the cuisine, desserts include a very tasty baklava. The Sunday buffet brunch is extravagant and reasonably priced.
Gyro-Mena 905 W. Belmont 773.935.2600.
Augments the Athenian Gyros by satisfying the American desire to pick our own toppings! True Athenian Gyros is a choice of all natural non-ground meat (pork or chicken) stacked and cooked on a rotisserie. MEXICAN/LATIN__________
Cesar’s 2924 N. Broadway 773.296.9097 and at
3166 N Clark 773.248.2835 This family-owned operation offers an enticing menu full of delicious Mexican recipes, popular house specialties, irresistible desserts, and their signature “Killer Margaritas.”
El Mariachi 3906 N. Broadway 773.549-2932
and at 3420 N. Broadway 773.549-7020. Quickly becoming one of the very best Mexican restaurants in the city, the focus is on using fresh, high-quality ingredients for its “south of the border” cuisine. Full bar featuring over 100 brands of tequila.
El Nuevo Mexicano 2914 N. Clark 773.528.2131.
Panino’s Pizzeria 3702 N. Broadway
Cozy dining room along with authentic Mexican cuisine makes this a great place for delicious dining. Open for lunch & dinner, great patio for summer outdoor dining. Delivery available too!
Piehole Pizza 3477 N. Broadway 773.525.8888. From their hole to yours. Traditional pizza served in untraditional ways. Delivering until late at night.
Las Mananitas 3523 N. Halsted St. 773.528.2109. Traditional & regional Mexican dishes along with freshly squeezed limes for margaritas. Nice place to eat, drink and window watch people on Halsted St. Has a full bar & plenty of hardy dishes to satisfy any appetite. Serving the community for over 28 years.
Mia Francesca 3311 N. Clark St. 773.281.3310.
Fiesta Mexicana 2423 N. Lincoln Ave 773.348.4144
773.472.6200. Panino’s has established itself as a Boystown favorite with its varied menu selections, including gyros and burgers, pasta entrees, and of course pizza. Delivery available.
Celebrating over 20 years in Lakeview. A zesty, earthy cuisine of Rome and the surrounding areas of Tuscany, Umbria and Lazio. Encourages the lively art of dining with a contemporary, casually sophisticated trattoria ambiance, simple, rustic cooking, friendly service and fair prices. Beautiful private outdoor patio and weekend brunch.
(2nd Location) 4806 N. Broadway 773.769.4244. Traditional favorites along with great ambiance. Nice place to bring your family, friends or bring a date to. The Lincoln location has daily specials & live music. Is your target market is in our distribution area?? ADVERTISE YOUR RESTAURANT IN BOI MAGAZINE Call 773.975.0264 or email us at boiADS@aol.com
Chicago spotlight: ISRAEL WRIGHT Interviews with leaders in Chicago’s GLBT community A 2000 inductee into Chicago’s Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame, Israel Wright is wellknown for documenting the leather and African-American communities, as well as people with AIDS, through his distinctive photographs. A longtime activist, Wright is a fixture at a variety of LGBT events throughout the city and the region. When did you come out and what was the experience like for you? I really do not think I was ever in the closet. When I was as young as four years old, I felt strong connections to males. I don’t think I was born with the gene to have the attraction to the opposite sex. My mother told me she recognized that I might have had likes for men at that early age. Please name five of your LGBT heroes and say a few words about why you chose them. Renae Ogletree: Chicago Gay and Lesbian Hall of Famer and all around activist. She was a real trooper in the gay and lesbian movement. Most of her energy was creating a path that allowed youth to have a pointed view of successful lesbians and gays. Marcus Hernandez: Judge emeritus for International Mister Leather. We shared many moments documenting the leather community. The more time I was able to share with him, the more I came to know an individual whose contributions to society were commendable. Earl Welther: He was a man who suffered from the disability of overweight. Weighing in at over 600 pounds, he was a gentle soul with lots of hope and care for his fellow travelers. Earl, later in life, focused his efforts to create safe sane loving environments for older men. 22 boi
Steve Wakefield: I did a lot of community activism with Steve in the early eighties through the nineties. He shared much though his service to the community. Lorraine Sade Baskerville: Knowing her through her transition to become the woman she is today has been a journey itself. She has survived many adversities to be a leading figure on trans issues. What do you consider to be your most significant contribution to the GLBT community in Chicago and at large? I had the opportunity to take photos for a publication called Nightlines many years ago. Through this experience, I was able to develop my photography skills and document the GLBT community. I find sometime you may not be able to say all that needs to be said in words, but a picture can capture the moment for that second in time and create lasting memories that live through the ages. Sharing the history of the GLBT community through my eyes has been richly rewarding for me. I look forward to continuing to let others see what I am experiencing. What are your future goals and aspirations? I hope to be able to work with others with similar interests to teach them the techniques of recording what can be and is the history of our day-to-day existence. Many times, we are not aware of the historic value of our experiences until time has passed. Words of wisdom for the next LGBT generation? Be vigilant in your pursuit to create your individual space in a world that constantly changes. Don’t be discouraged by those who tell you not to go for the gold. Find the strength within to be able to see each day that all you do to help others will come back to you two-fold.
in the Know, on the Go Last Gasps of Summer
Market Days is but a memory and we’re hurtling toward fall at break-neck speed. Where the hell did summer go? Keep the summer lovin’ going at Steamworks on Aug. 17 for the debut of “Rough Trade” featuring DJ Harry Cross (I’m hoping that’s a pseudonymwho would name their child that?)… Downtown Bar on Aug 23 will “Turn Up the Radio” for a release party for Madonna’s new single. Don’t know if her Madgesty will be there, but odder things have happened… Fly away to “Neverland” on Sunday, Sept. 11 at Hydrate… Pssst! Watch for a hot new party to hit Circuit on Monday nights in October as Cyon Flare hosts a “United House” party.
Out in the Park in the Dark
You can squeeze a few more summer memories in with Out in the Park at Six Flags Great America on Sept. 8. Unlike other gay day events, we’re getting the park all to ourselves from 9 p.m. to 1 in the fuckin’ morning! Matthew Harvat and Phil DaBeatz will spin beats throughout the park turning the whole pace into a dance floor. The event is being coordinated by the folks from BestGayChicago. com (with vitaminwater as a major sponsor), but in a major show of unity, BOI, Pride.com and Grab are acting as media sponsors. Best of all, it’s a benefit for T-PAN! Tickets purchased in advance are $35, which includes admission to the park (all day long if you choose to go earlier that day), free parking and admission. A portion of the advance ticket sales will benefit TPAN. Tickets are available now online at sixflags.com using promo code OUT2012. A limited number of bus tickets will be available, departing from Uptown on Montrose Avenue, 1 block West of Broadway. Buses will depart at 3 and 6pm. All buses will leave the park at 1am and return to Uptown. Bus tickets are extremely limited. Visit gaysixflagschicago.com for more information or call 773.878.5323.
Cocktailing for a Cause
Thanks to the many bars and clubs that have joined the “Cocktails Without Prejudice” campaign. Among the participating businesses are Sidetrack, Kit Kat, The Call, Lady Gregory’s, Wilde, Minibar, and Mayne Stage. All you have do to help is enjoy a Van Gogh cocktail and $1 will be donated to the ‘Give a Damn Campaign’ a project of Cyndi Lauper’s True Colors Fund. So bring your friends and enjoy yourselves. You can always call in to work the next day and tell your boss you were doing charity work the night before. For more information, go to wegiveadamn.org.
“Sappho’s Salon: A Provocative Night of Lesbian Diversions” takes place Saturday, Aug. 18, at Women & Children First Books. This month’s installment features a staged reading of “Dangerous to Ourselves”, which weaves together prose, poetry, drama, stand-up, essays, and interviews to shed light on lesbian lives and culture… Meanwhile, Homolatte at Big Chicks on Tuesday, Aug. 21, features Betsy Merbitz and Ellen Kay.
Gregg Shapiro’s Stage Business
Circle Theater’s production of “Reefer Madness” is as close to perfect as you can get. The young cast nails this camp classic to the wall, while the direction and costuming make the most out of limited resources and space. Hopefully it will be extended so more people can catch this great show…Raven Theater kicks off its 30th season with “The Big Knife” by Clifford Odets, opening Sept. 17. The play is about a top movie star and idealist, has a dream Hollywood career, but artistic and moral compromises have resulted in the slow destruction of his personality. boi 25
Relationship & sex
Miserable in Andersonville
My girlfriend and I have been together for five years. We recently began discussing the idea of getting married during our annual trip to Provincetown at the end of the summer. I came home from a business trip last week to find that she had moved all of her belongings out of our apartment. She left no information on how to find her and her work is the kind of thing she can do from anywhere as long as she has her phone and laptop, so I have no way to track her down. I’ve tried calling her family, but they said she hasn’t told them where she is. They are as upset as I am, as we have grown very close. I have thought of calling some of her clients and asking them if they’ve heard from her. I am very confused. I thought things were going very well between us. I just want to know why she left.
It’s obvious that your girlfriend has not been honest with you about her feelings for some time now. Why she moved out isn’t the point. The fact that she left without any kind of discussion or concern for you says more than any words she would have said to you. Perhaps she was feeling she wasn’t ready to get married, but even that doesn’t justify her actions. As painful as it is, you need to count this relationship as a loss and move on. The “why” and “where” don’t matter, it’s the “how” and “when” that reveal the “what” of her personality.
Donnie On Halsted
I have a bar I go to on a regular basis. One of the bartenders and I have struck up quite a friendship. I come in after work and we’ll hang out and talk. He acts like he really cares about me. But, if a few other customers come in, he starts paying more attention to them and only comes down to see if I need another drink. If I try to start up another conversation, he’ll hang with me for a minute or two before he’s off flirting with other dudes. Once a group of drunk straight girls came in and he spent about half the night taking care of them. I sometimes
feel I should go some other bar, but I don’t feel comfortable any place else. What can I do to let my friend know that he’s hurting our friendship?
You say this bartender is your friend. Have you ever socialized outside of the bar? Do you ever chat on the phone? Do you know his last name? If not, he’s not your friend, you’re his customer. That doesn’t mean that he doesn’t genuinely enjoy chatting with you. Most likely, you have built up this relationship in your mind. When he starts paying attention to other customers, he’s doing his job, just as he is when he’s paying attention to you. Bartenders rely on their tips for the majority of their income and the better he is at making every customer feel that they are his favorite, the better he will be paid. If you want to take your “bar friendship” to the next level, ask him to do something social with you outside of a bar setting, but don’t be surprised if the answer is no.
The other night I was a little drunk when I left the bar so I took a cab home. The cab driver was very cute and friendly. I was feeling a little horny, so I asked him if he wanted a blow job. He said yes and pulled into a dark parking lot. He came into the back seat and I sucked him off while I beat off. After he came, he yelled at me for coming on the floor of the cab. He went back up front, handed me some tissues, and told me to wipe up the cum. Then he turned the meter back on and drove me home. I was shocked when he asked for the fare. We had just had sex and now he was asking me for money? I was very insulted. I paid him, but gave him no tip. Can you believe his nerve?
Yes I can. It’s yours with which I’m having trouble. Unless you offered to have sex with him instead of paying the fare, which would make you a “taxi whore”, he had every right to expect payment for the ride. You should be thankful he turned off the meter while you were having sex, which probably saved you a few bucks. boi 29
CHICAGO BARS & CLUBS Boystown / Lakeview
3160 3160 N.Clark G&L, LM,DS Berlin 954 W. Belmont G&L, D, 4 Bobby Love’s 3729 N. Halsted G&L Buck’s Saloon 3439 N. Halsted G Cell Block 3702 N. Halsted G, LF Charlie’s 3726 N. Broadway G, D, W Circuit 2.02 3641 N. Halsted G&L, D, 4 Cocktail 3359 N. Halsted G, GB Elixir Lounge 3452 N. Halsted G, 4 F. O’Mahony’s 3701 N. Broadway G&L, R Hydrate 3458 N. Halsted G, D, DS, 4 Kit Kat 3700 N. Halsted G&L, DS, R Little Jim’s 3501 N. Halsted G, V, 4 Lucky Horseshoe 3169 N. Halsted G, GB Manhandler 1948 N. Halsted G, W, 4 Minibar 3341 N. Halsted G, R North End 3733 N. Halsted G Roscoe’s 3356 N. Halsted G, D, V, DS Scarlet 3320 N. Halsted G Sidetrack 3349 N. Halsted G, V Smart Bar / Metro 3730 N. Clark MS, D, 4 Spin 800 W. Belmont G&L, V, 4 The Closet 3325 N. Broadway G&L, V, 4
773.327.5969 773.348.4975 773.525.1200 773.525.1125 773.665.8064 773.871.8887 773.325.2233 773.477.1420 773.477.1420 773.549.0226 773.975.9244 773.525.1111 773.871.6116 773.404.3169 773.871.3339 773.871.6227 773.477.7999 773.281.3355 773.348.1053 773.477.9189 773.549.4140 773.327.7711 773.477.8533
Chicago Northside CONTINUED
Crew 4804 N. Broadway G&L, V, R 773.784.2739 Davenport’s 1383 N. Milwaukee G&L, LM 773.278.1830 Debonair Social Club 1575 N. MilwaukeeAve. MS, D 773.227.7990 Fat Cat 4849 N. Broadway MS, R 773.506.3100 Green Dolphin 2200 N. Ashland G&L, D, LM, 4 773.395.0066 Green Mill 4802 N. Broadway MS, LM, 4 773.878.5552 In Fine Spirits 5420 N Clark MS, R 773.334.9463 Jackhammer 6406 N. Clark G, D, V, GB, LM, 4 773.743.5772 Joi de Vine 1744 W. Balmoral L, R 773.989.6846 Kinetic Playground 1113 W. LawrenceMS, D, LM, 4 773.769.5483 Marty’s 1511 W. Balmoral G&L 773.561.6425 Mary’s Attic 5400 N Clark G&L, D, V, R 773.784.6969 Parlour On Clark 6341 N. Clark 773.564.9274 Mary’s RecRoom 5402 N Clark G&L, D, V, R 773.784.6969 Scot’s 1829 W. Montrose G&L 773.528.3253 Scot’s 1829 W. Montrose G&L 773.528.3253 Sidecar Bar 6920 N. Glenwood 773.764.2826 T’s 5025 N. Clark G&L, R 773.784.6000 The Call 1547 W Bryn Mawr G&L, D, DS, V, LM 773.334.2525 The Glenwood 6962 N Glenwood G 773.764.7363 Touché 6412 N. Clark G, V, LF, 4 773.465.7400 Uptown Lounge 1136 W. Lawrence 773.878.1136
Chicago Downtown-Near north Chicago Southside
Baton Show Lounge 436 N. Clark DS 312.644.5269 Club 720 720 N. Wells MS, D, 4 312.787.8720 Crimson Lounge 333 N. Dearborn MS, D, R 312.923.2473 Downtown Bar & Lounge 440 N State G 312.464.1400 Dragon Lady Lounge 3188 N. Elston 773.267.1970 Excalibur/Vision 632 N. Dearborn MS, D, 4 312.266.1944 Funky Buddha 728 W. Grand Ave. MS, D 312.666.1695 House of Blues 329 N. Dearborn MS, LM, 4 312.923.2000 Krush/Prop House 1657 N. Elston G&L, D, 4 773.486.2390 Nikki 1543 N. Kingsbury St. MS, D, 4 312.857.5009 Second Story Bar 157 E. Ohio G, V 312.923.9536 Sound Bar 226 W. Ontario MS, D, 4 312.787-4480 Spy Bar 646 N. Franklin MS, D, 4 312.587.8779 Underground 56 W. Illinois MS, D, 4 312.644.7600 Vibe 1543 N. Kingsbury MS, D, 4 312.266.1900
Club Escape 1530 E. 75th G&L, D Escapades 6301 S. Harlem G&L, D, V, 4 Inn Exile 5758 W. 65th G&L, D, V Jeffrey Pub 7041 S. Jeffrey G&L, D, V, 4
Banana Video 4923 N. Clark G, BK Bijou Theater 1349 N. Wells G, GB, BK Man’s Country 5017 N. Clark G, GB, BH Steamworks 3246 N. Halsted G, BH, FC The Ram 35111/2 N. Halsted G, BK, D
The Anvil 1137 W. Granville G, V @mosphere 5355 N. Clark G&L, V, GB Big Chicks 5024 N. Sheridan G&L, D, R
773.973.0006 773.784.1100 773.728.5511
G------------------------------------------------------------------Gay Male L---------------------------------------------------------------------Lesbian G&L-------------------------------------------------Gay Male & Lesbian D-------------------------------------------------------------------Dancing V-----------------------------------------------------------------------Video GB-------------------------------------------------------------Go Go Boys DS--------------------------------------------------------------Drag Show R--------------------------------------------------------Restaurant, Food
773.667.6454 773.229.0886 773.582.3510 773.363.8555
Hideaway 7301 W. Roosevelt Forest Park G, D, V, DS, GB Club Krave 13126 S. Western Blue Island G&L, D, V, DS, GB, 4 Hunters 1932 E. Higgins Elk Grove Village G, D, V, GB, 4 Mission 209 E. Chicago Downtown Elgin G&L, D, V Encompass 24215 Rush St. Lake Station, IN G&L, D, R, DS Velvet Rope 728 Lake St Oak Park G&L, D, V, R
708.771.4459 708.597.8379 847.439.8840 847.488.0320 219.962.4640 708.358.8840
773.561.8322 312.943.5397 773.878.2069 773.929.6080 773.525.9528
4-------------------------------------------------------------Open til 4am MS--------------------------------------------------------Mostly Straight LF---------------------------------------------------------Leather / Fetish W-------------------------------------------------------------------Western LM--------------------------------------------------Live Music / Cabaret BH--------------------------------------------------------------Bath House BK----------------------------------Adult Book, Booth & Video Store FC-------------------------------------------------------------Fitness Club