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Love & Romance
Dating in South Florida Is No Walk On The Beach
So Happy Together
Longtime Couples Share Secrets To Wedded Bliss
Romance Novelists Heat Up The Local Landscape
Aisle Of Style A Wedding Combines Boca Raton Grandeur And South Beach Panache February 2011
a Tale of Cities
How Celebrity Duo Giuliana & Bill Rancic Make Their LongDistance Marriage Work
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The Love & Romance Issue
Photo courtesy of The Style Network
VOLUME VIII NUMBER 2
features LET’S GIVE THEM SOMETHING TO TALK ABOUT
Even For These Six Great Catches, Dating Is No Walk On The Beach
SO HAPPY TOGETHER Longtime Couples Share The Secrets To Connubial Bliss
LOVE STORIES Meet Five Romance Novelists Heating Up The South Florida Landscape
AISLE OF STYLE A Unique Wedding Combines Boca Raton Grandeur With South Beach Panache
54 A TALE
OF TWO CITIES WITH A LITTLE CREATIVITY AND A LOT OF LOVE, CELEBRITY COUPLE GIULIANA AND BILL RANCIC MAKE THEIR LONGDISTANCE MARRIAGE WORK
66 72 78
VOLUME VIII NUMBER 2
departments OBSERVED HOT STUFF & THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE IT HAPPEN 19 The Buzz 24 Trends 28 La Vida Boca
MEDIA BLITZ THE QUINTESSENTIAL ARTS REPORT 31 On Screen 34 In Print 38 On Scene THAT’S LIFE A GUIDE TO PERSONAL GROWTH 43 Relations 46 Parents 50 Destinations TASTE THE DISH ON FOOD, WINE & RESTAURANTS 95 Bites 96 Sinful Dessert Recipes 98 Review 100 Listings
24 50 96 1 131 31
HAPPENINGS THE ESSENTIAL SOCIAL DIGEST 119 Around Town 131 Calendar 146 Flash FYI COOL CARS, LOCAL NOTABLES & REAL DEALS 159 Hot Wheels 160 Now & Noteworthy 162 At Home GIVING BACK CHARITY NEVER GOES OUT OF STYLE 168
ORIDA M FL
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PHOTO COURTESY OF THE STYLE NETWORK
ST MO AWARD-G
LOVE & ROMANCE
DATING IN SOUTH FLORIDA IS NO WALK ON THE BEACH
ON THE COVER: GIULIANA AND BILL RANCIC
SO HAPPY TOGETHER
LONGTIME COUPLES SHARE SECRETS TO WEDDED BLISS
ROMANCE NOVELISTS HEAT UP THE LOCAL LANDSCAPE
AISLE OF STYLE A WEDDING COMBINES BOCA RATON GRANDEUR AND SOUTH BEACH PANACHE FEBRUARY 2011
HOW CELEBRITY DUO GIULIANA & BILL RANCIC MAKE THEIR LONGDISTANCE MARRIAGE WORK
Volume VIII, Number 2 The Boca Raton Observer, (USPS 024758, ISSN 1940-4239) is published monthly except for July by A&A Publishing Corp. Executive offices: 950 Peninsula Corporate Circle, Suite 1020, Boca Raton, FL 33487. Periodical Postage Paid at Boca Raton, FL and at additional mailing offices. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to The Boca Raton Observer, 950 Peninsula Corporate Circle, Suite 1020, Boca Raton, FL 33487.
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CONTRIBUTORS writers Bill Bowen Stephanie Dunn Linda Haase Cheryl Kane Heimlich Steve Kates Lori Lawrence Emily J. Minor Roberta Sandler Dianna Smith Kate Townsend Dian Vujovich
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CARLOS A. BODDEN, ESQ.
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COMING SOON MARCH • THE HOME & DESIGN ISSUE Glamorous homes, chic designs and DIY projects
APRIL • THE WOMEN’S ISSUE Fabulous fashions, fascinating people and style for miles
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12TH STREET BY CYNTHIA VINCENT • 291 • 6126 BY LINDSAY LOHAN • 7 FOR ALL MANKIND •AG DENIM • AKA NEW YORK • ALC • ALEXIS • ALICE + OLIVIA • ANLO • AARON ASHE • BLACK HALO • BLU MOON • BOULEE • CC SKYE • CAMILLA AND MARC • CHARLOTTE RONSON • CHELSEA FLOWER • CORSON • CURRENT/ELLIOTT • CYNTHIA VINCENT CLOTHING & SHOES • DAVID LERNER LEGGINGS • DIANE VON FURSTENBERG • ELIZABETH & JAMES • EQUIPMENT • ERIN KLEINBERG • GEMMA • GRYPHON • HALSTON • HANKY PANKY • HAUTE HIPPIE • J BRAND • JENNIFER ZEUNER • JENS PIRATE BOOTY • JOIE • LINE • LNA • LOEFFLER RANDALL • LOVE SAM • LOVE SHOP • LOVE QUOTES • MADISON MARCUS • MARA HOFFMAN • MINNIE ROSE • MISSONI SCARVES & SHOES • MYNE • NATION LTD • NAVEN • OF TWO MINDS • PARKER • PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS • POUR LA VICTOIRE • RED CARTER • ROBERT RODRIGUEZ • RORY BECA • ROSA CHA • RICH AND SKINNY • SASS AND BIDE • SON OF JOHN • SMYTHE • SPANX • SYDNEY EVAN • T BAGS • TOP SECRET • TORN BY RONNY KOBO • VEDA • VINTAGE CHANEL • WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND • ZIMMERMAN • 12TH STREET BY CYNTHIA VINCENT • 291 • 6126 BY LINDSAY LOHAN • 7 FOR ALL MANKIND •AG DENIM • AKA NEW YORK • ALC • ALEXIS • ALICE + OLIVIA • ANLO • AARON ASHE • BLACK HALO • BLU MOON • BOULEE • CC SKYE • CAMILLA AND MARC • CHARLOTTE RONSON • CHELSEA FLOWER • CORSON • CURRENT/ELLIOTT • CYNTHIA VINCENT CLOTHING & SHOES • DAVID LERNER LEGGINGS • DIANE VON FURSTENBERG • ELIZABETH & JAMES • EQUIPMENT • ERIN KLEINBERG • GEMMA • GRYPHON • HALSTON • HANKY PANKY • HAUTE HIPPIE • J BRAND • JENNIFER ZEUNER • JENS PIRATE BOOTY • JOIE • LINE • LNA • LOEFFLER RANDALL • LOVE SAM • LOVE SHOP • LOVE QUOTES • MADISON MARCUS • MARA HOFFMAN • MINNIE ROSE • MISSONI SCARVES & SHOES • MYNE • NATION LTD • NAVEN • OF TWO MINDS • PARKER • PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS • POUR LA VICTOIRE • RED CARTER • ROBERT RODRIGUEZ • RORY BECA • ROSA CHA • RICH AND SKINNY • SASS AND BIDE • SON OF JOHN • SMYTHE • SPANX • SYDNEY EVAN • T BAGS • TOP SECRET • TORN BY RONNY KOBO • VEDA • VINTAGE CHANEL • WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND • ZIMMERMAN • 12TH STREET BY CYNTHIA VINCENT • 291 • 6126 BY LINDSAY LOHAN • 7 FOR ALL MANKIND •AG DENIM • AKA NEW YORK • ALC • ALEXIS • ALICE + OLIVIA • ANLO • AARON ASHE • BLACK HALO • BLU MOON • BOULEE • CC SKYE • CAMILLA AND MARC • CHARLOTTE RONSON • CHELSEA FLOWER • CORSON • CURRENT/ELLIOTT • CYNTHIA VINCENT CLOTHING & SHOES • DAVID LERNER LEGGINGS • DIANE VON FURSTENBERG • ELIZABETH & JAMES • EQUIPMENT • ERIN KLEINBERG • GEMMA • GRYPHON • HALSTON • HANKY PANKY • HAUTE HIPPIE • J BRAND • JENNIFER ZEUNER • JENS PIRATE BOOTY • JOIE • LINE • LNA • LOEFFLER RANDALL • LOVE SAM • LOVE SHOP • LOVE QUOTES • MADISON MARCUS • MARA HOFFMAN • MINNIE ROSE • MISSONI SCARVES & SHOES • MYNE • NATION LTD • NAVEN • OF TWO MINDS • PARKER • PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS • POUR LA VICTOIRE • RED CARTER • ROBERT RODRIGUEZ • RORY BECA • ROSA CHA • RICH AND SKINNY • SASS AND BIDE • SON OF JOHN • SMYTHE • SPANX • SYDNEY EVAN • T BAGS • TOP SECRET • TORN BY RONNY KOBO • VEDA • VINTAGE CHANEL • WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND • ZIMMERMAN • 12TH STREET BY CYNTHIA VINCENT • 291 • 6126 BY LINDSAY LOHAN • 7 FOR ALL MANKIND •AG DENIM • AKA NEW YORK • ALC • ALEXIS • ALICE + OLIVIA • ANLO • AARON ASHE • BLACK HALO • BLU MOON • BOULEE • CC SKYE • CAMILLA AND MARC • CHARLOTTE RONSON • CHELSEA FLOWER • CORSON • CURRENT/ELLIOTT • CYNTHIA VINCENT CLOTHING & SHOES • DAVID LERNER LEGGINGS • DIANE VON FURSTENBERG • ELIZABETH & JAMES • EQUIPMENT • ERIN KLEINBERG • GEMMA • GRYPHON • HALSTON • HANKY PANKY • HAUTE HIPPIE • J BRAND • JENNIFER ZEUNER • JENS PIRATE BOOTY • JOIE • LINE • LNA • LOEFFLER RANDALL • LOVE SAM • LOVE SHOP • LOVE QUOTES • MADISON MARCUS • MARA HOFFMAN • MINNIE ROSE • MISSONI SCARVES & SHOES • MYNE • NATION LTD • NAVEN • OF TWO MINDS • PARKER • PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS • POUR LA VICTOIRE • RED CARTER • ROBERT RODRIGUEZ • RORY BECA • ROSA CHA • RICH AND SKINNY • SASS AND BIDE • SON OF JOHN • SMYTHE • SPANX • SYDNEY EVAN • T BAGS • TOP SECRET • TORN BY RONNY KOBO • VEDA • VINTAGE CHANEL • WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND • ZIMMERMAN • 12TH STREET BY CYNTHIA VINCENT • 291 • 6126 BY LINDSAY LOHAN • 7 FOR ALL MANKIND •AG DENIM • AKA NEW YORK • ALC • ALEXIS • ALICE + OLIVIA • ANLO • AARON ASHE • BLACK HALO • BLU MOON • BOULEE • CC SKYE • CAMILLA AND MARC • CHARLOTTE RONSON •
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02.11 from the publisher
ow can you not appreciate a month that celebrates love and gives you an excuse to eat chocolate? In honor of Valentineâ€™s Day, our February issue is dedicated to all things romantic.
Linda L. Behmoiras firstname.lastname@example.org
We couldnâ€™t think of better cover subjects than adorable celebrity couple Bill and Giuliana Rancic. These two not only co-author books about relationships and star in an E! reality TV show, but truly adore each other. In an exclusive interview with The Boca Raton Observer, they open up about how they met, their long-distance marriage, the challenges of trying to have a child and much more. Get to know the Rancics in â€œA Tale of Two Citiesâ€? (page 54). Speaking of great couples, for this issue we approached some of our townâ€™s most happily married and long-lasting pairs and asked: What is the secret to your success? What they say may surprise you, and will definitely educate you. Learn their marital tips in â€œSo Happy Togetherâ€? (page 66). And while weâ€™re on the subject of marriage, youâ€™ll want to check out a stunning South Florida wedding created by Boca Raton event planning firm Xquisite Events. Not only is the affair unique and vibrant, but manages to combine the elegance of Boca Raton with the
T H E B O C A R AT O N O B S E R V E R
chic vibe of South Beach. Donâ€™t miss â€œAisle of Styleâ€? (page 78). Of course, we donâ€™t leave out our single readers. When we wanted to learn what the dating scene was really like in Boca Raton, we went straight to the source, gathering a group of eligible bachelors and bachelorettes and peppering them with questions. The result: A frank and entertaining conversation about the trials and tribulations of single life in South Florida. For their insights, read â€œLetâ€™s Give Them Something To Talk Aboutâ€? (page 58). And finally, in the true spirit of love, we found some of the publishing industryâ€™s most prolific romance novelists â€“ living right here in our own backyard! Inside, we introduce you to the writers behind the beautiful damsels in distress and their knights in shining armor in â€œLove Storiesâ€? (page 72). In the true spirit of love, we hope you spend the month of February truly showing your affection to those around you. Best wishes for a month filled with love and laughter.
Photo by Patty Daniels
LOVE IS IN THE AIR
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observed hot stuff & the people who make it happen
8 the buzz 8 trends 8 la vida boca
A Novel Guy Photo by Herman Estevez
Last we spoke with New York Times best-selling author Brad Meltzer, one of our favorite local literary success stories, the South Florida husband and father of three had just released his first nonfiction book, “Heroes for my Son,” about 52 people who helped change the world. Now he’s got a new book, “The Inner Circle,” a hot political thriller. Not only is this guy extremely affable, but prolific: The 42-year-old law school grad wrote the critically acclaimed comic books “Identity Crisis” and “Justice League of America,” and currently hosts “Brad Meltzer’s Decoded” on the History Channel. Oh, and his string of novels has been translated into more than 25 languages. The baby-faced Meltzer recently made an appearance at the tony Promenade condominium in downtown Boynton Beach to sign autographs, and took time out to chat with The Boca Raton Observer. So tell us about “The Inner Circle” and how you came up with its premise.
“I was talking to a former president about how hard it is to keep a secret in the White House. And looking back through history, I found that George Washington had his own personal spy ring. I thought, wouldn’t it be cool if that still existed today – and who’s to say it doesn’t? In the story, a young archivist finds out the spy ring does exist – the greatest secret of the presidency.” We hear you’re not a fan of flying. Why? And have you done a lot of it to promote your new book?
“Anyone who writes a thriller is paranoid at heart – the hazards of an active imagination. Yes, I’m in Michigan now and I was in Atlanta yesterday. I travel to a city a day.”
You’re such a success story, but there were many rejections along the way. To what do you attribute your perseverance?
“Stubbornness – it’s how my mother and father were, and that’s what they taught me. There were only 20 publishers at the time I wrote my manuscript and I got 24 rejections – I think they were really trying to get their point across. But if you love something you have to fight for it. It’s the only way to find your dream.” You attended law school. Why decide to write instead of practice law?
“I love the law, but I just think you have to follow your passion and my passion is to write. I like to talk to my imaginary friends.” Do you read your reviews?
“I read them all. I think some people like to say everyone’s
The Buzz by Felicia S. Levine
Booking Good: Author Brad Meltzer
wrong – but there are constructive reviews out there. It’s important to find ones that help you grow as a writer.” You live a relatively low-key life in South Florida. With all your success, how do you remain grounded?
“Just because someone buys your books doesn’t mean you’re any better, smarter or nicer – anyone who thinks otherwise is insane.” What’s your favorite local restaurant?
“I love Uncle Julio’s. It’s my favorite from Washington, D.C., and finally they’re here in South Florida.”
Do you get recognized on the street?
“I never did from the novels but now that the TV show is out I do and it’s funny. The first time I got recognized was in the bathroom – the perfect place to be recognized.” What books are currently on your nightstand?
“‘The Hunger Games’ trilogy (by Suzanne Collins), and I’m rereading ‘Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing’ by Judy Blume.” What’s next for you?
“I’m working on a new thriller, and ‘Heroes for My Daughter.’ She wants to know where her book is.” –Amber Knittel
Got a tip? E-mail the editor at Felicia@bocaratonobserver.com
observed the buzz
Whatâ€™s wrong with Warren Buffett. All that money and he drives a Lincoln Continental. Heâ€™s obviously not from Boca.
Donald Silverman, New Hampshire snowbird and father of comedian Sarah Silverman, whoâ€™s become known for his hilarious, acerbic tweets about Boca Ratonâ€™s excesses on his RantsFromBoca Twitter account. At press time he had 7,000 followers, and we suspect that number will grow. Source: Sun-Sentinel
WHEELIE FUN: (From Left) Creators Mary Moschos and Joanna James; a client uses her Love Handles.
LOVE HANDLES Ordinary baby strollers are so passĂŠ. And fitness strollers? Yawn. The latest, most innovative exercise gadget for moms looking to drop baby fat â€“ but not lose precious bonding time by spending hours at the gym â€“ is Love Handles, the first elliptical trainer made specifically for baby strollers. Celebrities Kelly Ripa and Brooke Burke are fans of the device, invented by Mary Moschos of Fort Lauderdale and her daughter, New York resident Joanna James. â€œWe created Love Handles because we didnâ€™t think it made sense that moms were out pushing strollers for hours, but not able to really get a great workout or target the problem areas after giving birth,â€? explains James. â€œWith Love Handles you can now target your upper-body, get a full cardio workout, strengthen your core and burn more than three times the calories.â€? The way it works: When the durable, preassembled Love Handles arrives, simply attach it to your stroller â€“ the design allows users to propel the stroller forward while moving the arms, and resistance can be increased or decreased at any time. The whole shebang sells for $99.99. For more information, visit lovehandlesinc.com. â€“ Kate Townsend
WILL WORK FOR KNOWLEDGE You know times are tough when the government solicits volunteers to help run its office. Challenged by massive budget cuts, Lake Worth is looking for folks to help answer phones, scan documents, help with special events and more; thereâ€™s also a student volunteer program. All participants must undergo a criminal background check (â€œYou canâ€™t be too careful these days,â€? City Manager Susan Stanton told The Palm Beach Post) and while they wonâ€™t receive cash, volunteers will get invaluable knowledge about how City Hall works.
T H E B O C A R AT O N O B S E R V E R
THATâ€™S HOW MUCH IT WILL SET YOU back for a ticket to see R&B superstar Rihanna perform as part of the DanaFarber Cancer Instituteâ€™s Discovery Celebration Gala at Donald Trumpâ€™s Mar-a-Lago on February 19th. The evening will also include a five-course meal, and, naturally, the chance to rub elbows with Palm Beach society.
Source: The Palm Beach Post
HEREâ€™S THE TICKET: Rihanna
She Did It Again! Work with one of the Top 1000 Financial Advisors. R. Jo Kaufman, a Morgan Stanley Smith Barney Financial Advisor, recognized in 2009 as one of Barron’s Top 1000 Financial Advisors was included again in the 2010 list. Barron’s Top 1000 Financial Advisors ranks the top advisors on a state by state basis. This exclusive list recognizes Financial Advisors for their professionalism, success and dedication to clients; something R. Jo Kaufman has been doing for 28 years. If you are looking for this kind of experience, call today. For a complimentary no-obligation ﬁnancial consultation contact: R. Jo Kaufman Financial Advisor 1801 N. Military Trail, Suite 300 Boca Raton, FL 33431 800-321-1034 www.fa.smithbarney.com/kaufmankatzgroup
A Morgan Stanley Company
Source: Barron’s “Top 1,000 Advisors,” February 22, 2010, as identiﬁed by Barron’s magazine, using quantitative and qualitative criteria and selected from a pool of over 4,000 nominations. Advisors in the Top 1,000 Financial Advisors have a minimum of seven years of ﬁnancial services experience. Qualitative factors include, but are not limited to, compliance record, interviews with senior management, and philanthropic work. Investment performance is not a criterion. The rating may not be representative of any one client’s experience and is not indicative of the Financial Advisor’s future performance. Neither Morgan Stanley Smith Barney LLC nor its Financial Advisors pay a fee to Barron’s in exchange for the rating. Barron’s is a registered trademark of Dow Jones & Company, L.P. All rights reserved. © 2010 Morgan Stanley Smith Barney LLC. Member SIPC.
NY CS 6481967 10/10
observed the buzz TROPICAL ANTIDOTE: (From Top) An aerial view of Sunset Key Guest Cottages in Key West; a cozy getaway cottage by the sea.
ADDICTED TO CRACKBERRY Admit it. You havenâ€™t gone more than two minutes without checking your e-mail or texting since you bought your smart phone, iPad or (fill in the blank). Your eyes hurt, and your texting handâ€™s not feeling so great either. What you need is a technological detox. Enter, Sunset Key Guest Cottages in Key West. Capitalizing on peopleâ€™s need for downtime (once a luxury; now a health necessity), the Westin resort cleverly offers a Re-Boot Package, designed to help guests break â€“ or at least take a break from â€“ their electronic addictions. In addition to the obvious amenities (pool or beach lounges, accommodations and some meals), the getaway includes a personal journal, Hemingway paperback novel, the current issue of your favorite magazine, a sketch pad and pencils, fishing pole rentals, a BlackBerry hand massage and a spa treatment of choice. For the truly fanatical, thereâ€™s an added Techno Detox program: Here, island ambassadors will happily confiscate all your electronic devices and place them in safe deposit boxes, and then let you earn back 10 minutes of use for every hour spent lounging at the beach, pool or spa. Sounds like hard work, but someoneâ€™s got to do it. The package is good through August 31st. For more information, visit westinsunsetkeycottages.com. OVERHEARD
Itâ€™s a miracle. He doesnâ€™t appear to have a broken bone.
Miami police spokesperson Kenie Reyes, referring to 4-year-old Joey Williams, a Miami boy who fell from a seventh-floor condominium/hotel balcony in Miami. Williams had been chasing after a balloon in his familyâ€™s condo when he tumbled over the balcony; after a palm tree and a shrub broke his fall, he landed on a dirt surface near the pool deck. Source: Sun-Sentinel
THE AMOUNT OF FOOD WASTED IN AMERICA EVERY YEAR â€“ enough to fill the Rose Bowl. This, according to Jonathan Bloom, author of â€œAmerican Wasteland: How America Throws Nearly Half of its Food Away (and What We Can Do About Itâ€?). Source: Mcclatchy Newspapers
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T H E B O C A R AT O N O B S E R V E R
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T H E B O C A R AT O N O B S E R V E R
the caribbeanâ€™s hidden treasure has a bright new jewel. Introducing Hyatt Regency CuraĂ§ao Golf Resort, Spa and Marina. Situated on a coveted 27-acre oasis on the exclusive Santa Barbara Plantation, Hyatt Regency CuraĂ§ao offers an unmatched luxury experience only 35 miles from the island of Aruba. The resort features 350 modern guestrooms, each with a full balcony and magnificent views, an 18-hole Pete Dye championship golf course, a 1,500-foot white sand beach and an extensive pool complex. Explore unique island treasures, such as the CuraĂ§ao Sea Aquarium, the MikvĂŠ Israel-Emanuel Synagogue and the Kura Hulanda Museum in the Historic Area of Willemstad, a UNESCO World Heritage Site. For reservations, contact your travel agent, call 800 55 HYATT or visit curacao.hyatt.com. Hyatt. Youâ€™re More Than Welcome.
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STRAIGHT TALKER: Siggy Flicker.
CANDID CUPID TV Matchmaker Siggy Flicker Takes Guessing Out Of The Dating Game S
Often, heâ€™s merely being confronted with varnish-free truth â€“ a rare commodity among the rich and powerful.
Flicker says sheâ€™s grown accustomed to these â€œunrealistic expectations.â€? As head matchmaker for Model Quality Introductions, she has a roster of 150 clients, all in either New York City or Boca Raton, where she spent a decade raising her kids. â€œI love Boca,â€? says Flicker, 43, who still visits about every six weeks, sometimes staying with her former in-laws, the grandparents of her children, 8 and 11.
â€œSo youâ€™re 55 years old and you want to be matched with a 25-yearold supermodel?â€? says Flicker pointedly. â€œThatâ€™s not going to happen, Bob (not his real name). I want to know what kind of mirrors you have in your house.â€?
That her own first marriage didnâ€™t work doesnâ€™t daunt Flicker, who remains best friends with her ex-husband. She was first approached to try a matchmaking agency after getting divorced and moving to New York City. â€œI was reluctant at first,â€? she admits.
iggy Flicker, TV personality and successful matchmaker, considers herself more life coach than cupid, and her astute prescience about a clientâ€™s dating profile can verge on clairvoyance to a well-shod CEO accustomed to traipsing uncriticized through the insular halls of power.
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â€œI wasnâ€™t sure whether it was trustworthy.â€? But after some pondering and research, she acquiesced and tried a few dates. Now she runs one of the industryâ€™s most thriving outfits. Her success is due partly to her knack for cutting through the irrelevant and superficial to focus on what keeps well-educated, expensively appointed, highly paid professionals from understanding their most basic needs in a partner. Hence, sheâ€™s a â€œlife coach.â€? Clients in need of such coaching pay up to $20,000 for the service. Flicker has become so renowned that soon her matchmaking exploits will be documented on â€œFirst Love, Second Chance,â€? a new show for the TV Land
By Bill Bowen
network about reuniting old flames. â€œI canâ€™t say very much about it,â€? says Flicker. â€œBut it will be a starting-over matchmaking show. Iâ€™ll be the star.â€? Born Sigalit Flicker in an Israeli bomb shelter during the 1967 Six Day War, she draws on life experience to guide her romance counseling. Though, her own â€œsecond chanceâ€? was pure serendipity. â€œI was out with friends in a restaurant, in jeans, with no makeup and there he was,â€? recalls Flicker, who plans to marry her fiancĂŠ this year on the Italian island of Capri. She adds, with a touch of irony: â€œI advise millionaires about their matches, and Iâ€™m going to marry a car salesman.â€? O
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THE QUINTESSENTIAL ARTS
on screen in print on scene
â€œThe African Queenâ€?
PASSIONATE PICTURES 10 Films To Set The Mood (Or Not) For Valentineâ€™s Day
By Steve Kates
omantic films constitute one of the four basic movie genres (comedy, adventure and mystery being the other three) and thousands have been made. Still, there are special pictures that resonate in oneâ€™s mind and linger like a still recognizable scent in an old perfume flacon. The following selection represents romance in all its wildly diverse (and sometimes tortuous) forms. Some will leave you smiling; others will have you reaching for your hankies. All will touch your heart. And all are available to rent.
â€œTHE AFRICAN QUEENâ€? (1951,
â€œAN AFFAIR TO REMEMBERâ€?
ated by the old studio system.
NR) starring Humphrey Bogart and Katharine Hepburn. An adventure love story set in World War I German East Africa, showcasing two of the greatest film stars at the height of their professional powers. Middle-age chemistry is, nonetheless, chemistry, and here it is magic. It earned Bogart his only Oscar.
(1957, NR) starring Cary Grant and Deborah Kerr. Leo McCarey directed this memorable weeper and it shows his penchant for, and skill with, sentimental story lines (â€œGoing My Way,â€? The Bells of St. Maryâ€™sâ€?). It has all the slick trademark MGM production values and the stars are ample testimony to the taste and quality gener-
â€œANNIE HALLâ€? (1977, PG) starring Woody Allen and Diane Keaton. Writer/director/star Allen transformed the traditional notion of romantic movies in this seminal film, whose protagonists are irritating, insecure neurotics absorbed in what one might term â€œanti-chemisFEBRUARY 2011
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â€œThe Princess Brideâ€?
â€œGone With The Windâ€? â€œMoonstruckâ€?
â€œWhen Harry Met Sallyâ€? â€œWuthering Heightsâ€?
try.â€? Keaton garnered a Best Actress Oscar for her role; the film also earned Oscars for Allen as Best Director, Best Co-writer (with Marshall Brickman) and Best Picture.
â€œBRIEF ENCOUNTERâ€? (1945, NR) starring Trevor Howard and Celia Johnson. This simple story of two people who meet by chance in a suburban railway station is one of Noel Cowardâ€™s finest works, dealing with infatuation, infidelity,
personal morality and responsibility. Sixty-six years later, itâ€™s still presciently relevant to our society and its hang-ups.
tions and aborted love affairs. Like several of the other films on this list, â€œCasablancaâ€? provided a memorable movie line that is deathless â€“ â€œPlay it, Sam.â€? This classic garnered three Oscars including Best Picture.
nary and lonely people with gaping voids in their lives. Itâ€™s also about realistic compromise in love and companionship. Beautiful acting by two pros; Cher is especially superb, winning a Best Actress Oscar.
â€œGONE WITH THE WINDâ€? (1939, NR) starring Clark Gable and Vivien Leigh. What more need one say? The title and the opening music theme are still enough to produce instant goosebumps. Itâ€™s a
â€œTHE PRINCESS BRIDEâ€? (1987, PG) starring Cary Elwes and Mandy Patinkin. This is a charming spoof of some Hollywood action costume dramas. Elwes is ingenuous and sufficiently befuddled as the wayward
landmark picture, never dull, never out of style, and includes several of the greatest performances ever put on film. Deservedly, it won 10 Oscars, including Best Picture.
suitor for princess Robin Wright, while Patinkin, as a Latin swordsman is hilarious. No Oscars here, but good fun, good romance, an allstar cast and a happy ending.
â€œMOONSTRUCKâ€? (1989, PG)
â€œWHEN HARRY MET SALLYâ€?
starring Cher and Nicolas Cage. This romance is about rather ordi-
(1989, R) starring Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan. The chemistry between
â€œCASABLANCAâ€? (1942, PG) starring Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman. World War II provided so many scenarios for forced separa32
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Crystal and Ryan, two whining, OCD candidates, is wonderful, as is the wry, humorous screenplay by Nora Ephron. The path of true love is hardly straight, here, further complicated (but enhanced) by the ditzy and busybody comic contributions of Carrie Fisher in a role seemingly written just for her.
â€œWUTHERING HEIGHTSâ€? (1939, NR) starring Laurence Olivier and Merle Oberon. This potboiler
(from Emily Bronteâ€™s only novel) about a stable hand and the lady of the manor seethes with sexual innuendo and class discrimination. Olivier was fairly new to films at this point in his career, but Oberon and David Niven accommodated his still-theatrical style, to create a romantic drama for the ages. O
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PERFECT HARMONY To Find Relationship Bliss, Read Between The Lines
By Bill Bowen
â€œRelationships take work,â€? is the conventional wisdom you never got the chance to test before inevitable disagreements made you and your partner call the whole thing off. But wait: Isnâ€™t the definition of â€œirreconcilable differencesâ€? dependent on a
certain unwillingness to compromise? Can anything really break up a marriage or relationship that doesnâ€™t want to be broken up? These inspiring books will illuminate your path to eternal, more or less, relationship bliss.
Connect To Love: The Keys To Transforming Your Relationship
book features womenâ€™s personal anecdotes, as well as advice for couples regarding how to build a stronger bond by understanding what women need from a romantic relationship.
By M. Gary Neuman Licensed family advisor and author M. Gary Neuman says heâ€™s discovered the answer to the thorny question that has plagued civilizations for centuries: What do women want? He parlayed this information into a best-seller, â€œThe Truth About Cheating.â€? Now he takes his exploration of womenâ€™s needs to new plateaus in â€œConnect To Love,â€? which focuses on problems women face in marriages and relationships that might make them dissatisfied or willing to stray. Heâ€™s found that wives who are satisfied with their 34
Secrets of Great Marriages: Real Truth From Real Couples About Lasting Love By Charlie and Linda Bloom
marriages, for instance, have sex more than twice as frequently as those who are dissatisfied. The
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With the authority of a couple happily married for 35 years, the Bloomsâ€™ book sets out to analyze their success â€“ along with the success of 27 other couples whose unions have lasted an average of 30
years â€“ in the hope of explaining what makes marriage work. Their book, which is presented with en-
There are over 300 retail banks in Florida. Then there’s BankAtlantic.
BankAtlantic Ranked “Highest in Customer Satisfaction for Retail Banking in Florida” J.D. Power and Associates
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Hours vary by location. Visit BankAtlantic.com/Locations for a complete listing. BankAtlantic received the highest numerical score among retail banks in Florida in the proprietary J.D. Power and Associates 2010 Retail Banking Satisfaction StudySM. Study based on 47,673 total responses measuring 9 providers in Florida and measures opinions of consumers with their primary banking provider. Proprietary study results are based on experiences and perceptions of consumers surveyed in January 2010. Your experiences may vary. Visit jdpower.com. © 2010 BankAtlantic. 47829-BO-MA (8/10)
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For many people relationships are a delicate balancing act between the closeness yearned for and the space needed. As its title implies, ‘Breathing Room: Creating Space To Be A Couple’ recognizes such inner conflict and instructs that solitude can be achieved by companionable understanding of the source of space issues.
thusiasm and confidence, is as much a celebration of marriage as it is a “how-to” manual. The couples featured overcame a gamut of challenges, including difficulties with children, infidelity and financial ruin. In each case, honest dialogue, open hearts and a willingness to remain a unified front helped them prevail. Consequently, each relationship was able to heal and grow stronger. The Blooms distill realworld wisdom into practical, positive advice for strengthening your own relationship.
Secrets Of Happy Couples: Loving Yourself, Your Partner And Your Life By Kim Olver The ability to love another or accept love is not always a natural talent, and can be virtually impossible without first loving oneself. Such is the premise of professional counselor Kim Olver’s book, which states that, for a relationship to thrive and be happy, self-love is a key ingredient. In her book, Olver not only surveys couples and prominent relationship experts for feedback and suggestions, but analyzes the Relationship Cycle, which moves from the Alone Stage,
T h e B o c a R at o n Ob s e r v e r
to the Getting Together Stage, to the Compatibility Stage, to the Maintenance Stage, and then, ultimately, back to the Alone Stage (according to Olver, at least 50 percent of us will find ourselves alone again due to death, divorce or personal decision). Also inside, you’ll find advice for surviving affairs, tolerating differences and more.
Breathing Room: Creating Space To Be A Couple By Elayne Savage, Ph.D. For many people relationships are a delicate balancing act between the closeness yearned for and the space needed. As its title implies, this book recognizes such inner conflict and instructs that solitude can be achieved by companionable understanding of the source of space issues, be they cultural, generational or gender-based. Psychotherapist Elayne Savage’s book also explores the clash between partners’ expectations, how to deal with disappointments and how to recognize hidden agendas, and seeks to help couples find ways to balance space, caring and connection. She asks, “Are you tired of hurt feelings and misunderstandings that lead to anger and re-
sentment?” “Is resentment eating away at your relationship and interfering with the good stuff?” If you answered yes to either of these questions, this book may be for you.
For Better: The Science Of A Good Marriage By Tara Parker-Pope Author Tara Parker-Pope presents her book as “the definitive guide to the most profound relationship of our lives.” Well, it is hard to argue with science. Inside, Parker-Pope examines the components of a successful marriage, including monogamy, love, sex, children, money and housework with input from biologists, neuroscientists, psychologists and sociologists. Along the way, she takes readers to some unusual places, at one point observing the likelihood of whether monogamy comes naturally to our species, based on comparisons with others in the animal kingdom (she concludes it’s certainly possible). She also observes the crucial role that regular sex plays in a marriage and examines the most productive way to handle conflict. Parker-Pope doesn’t so much instruct as she does present data and allow readers to draw their own conclusions. O
Decorated Model Grand Opening!
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The Dalenna Versailles Features: Q
Expansive two-story single-family home design with ďŹ ve bedrooms, four full baths, and one half bath overlooking the water Q Private two-story study, formal living room, and family room accessible to the covered lanai Q Gourmet kitchen featuring a pantry, center island, and breakfast bar Q Spacious ďŹ rst-ďŹ‚oor master suite includes dual walk-in closets, an exercise area, and private bath
Pricing for the Dalenna Versailles starts at $1.2 Million Only a select few homes available for immediate move-in priced from the upper $900,000s
17354 Balaria Street, Boca Raton, FL 33496 Sales Centers Open Monday 10am-8pm, Tuesday-Sunday 10am-6pm From Floridaâ€™s Turnpike traveling south: Exit at Atlantic Ave. (exit #81) and turn left. Travel east approximately 1-1/2 miles and turn right onto Jog Rd. Proceed south on Jog Rd. for approximately 2-1/4 miles. The Azura community entrance will be on the left. From Floridaâ€™s Turnpike traveling north: Exit at Glades Rd. (exit #75) and turn left. Travel east approximately 1-1/2 miles to Powerline/Jog Rd. and turn left. Proceed north for approximately 3-1/2 miles just past Clint Moore Rd. The entrance to Azura will be on the right.
Brokers welcome. Homes available nationwide. This is not an offering where prohibited by law. Prices subject to change without notice. Photos are images only and should not be relied upon to conďŹ rm applicable features. CGC055953
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ABBA CADABRA The Ultimate Cover Band Performs At Kravis Center F
ans of the iconic Swedish group ABBA will get an earful when one of the worldâ€™s most authentic tribute bands, Waterloo, performs â€œAbba The Concertâ€? at the Raymond F. Kravis Center for the Performing Arts on February 12th at 8 p.m.
club as â€œthe best ABBA tribute band in the worldâ€? â€“ is named for the bandâ€™s breakthrough 1973 hit of the same name. It was formed in 1996 by teenage friends Camilla Hedren and Katja Nord, who sought and gained permis-
ABBA (named for each memberâ€™s first initial) was a â€™70s band driven by its own romantic involvements, creating a unique library of haunting and unforgettable hits, and ultimately perishing when the romance within its ranks died. But for that brief, glittering time span, the bandâ€™s music planted roots in our collective discobattered psyches. And while the band is gone, the music lives on. Waterloo â€“ named by the ABBA fan
T H E B O C A R AT O N O B S E R V E R
By Bill Bowen
sion from Bjorn Ulvaeus and Benny Andersson (ABBAâ€™s two Bs). The band performs all the ABBA hits, including â€œDancing Queen,â€? â€œFernando,â€? â€œMamma Mia,â€? â€œTake
A Chance On Meâ€? and â€œKnowing Me, Knowing You.â€? Itâ€™s been described as possessing â€œnote-perfect vocals,â€? and was further bolstered by a win in a Swedish TV lookalike competition, eventually making it to the finals of â€œStars in Euro Eyes.â€? Its success led to the development of its full-blown show, which began touring in 2001. By the time Waterloo celebrated its 10th anniversary in 2006, many original ABBA backup musicians helped mark the occasion. The band continues to tour worldwide, selling out the Hollywood Bowl, Royal Albert Hall and Wembley Arena. Perhaps the Kravis Center will be next. By the way, if you canâ€™t make the show on the 12th, thereâ€™s another one at the Fillmore Miami Beach at the Jackie Gleason Theater on February 11th. O For more information, call 561-832-7469 or visit kravis.org.
Prince Of Darkness
Ozzy Osbourne Rocks BankAtlantic Center
Johns Hopkins. We’ll get you there.
By Bill Bowen ohn Michael “Ozzy” Osbourne, whose early fame with the heavy metal-pioneering band Black Sabbath was the first of several successful public incarnations, has reason to have a warm spot for South Florida. It was in 1997 in West Palm Beach that Ozzy launched his hugely popular Ozzfest tours. Now he returns February 20th, when he’ll perform a 7:30 p.m. show at the BankAtlantic Center.
Osbourne’s career began with the dark messages of Black Sabbath, the band that specialized in gloomy songs and started the heavy metal genre. The band, which was created by Osbourne, Geezer Butler, Tony Iommi and Bill Ward, tried to recreate the atmosphere of a horror film with its music by using harsh and sometimes dissonant guitar licks, combined with Osbourne’s eerie singing style. The resultant sound, the genesis of heavy metal, was unfamiliar to music critics, who pronounced each Black Sabbath album unappealing as the band released Black Sabbath, Paranoid and Master of Reality, only to watch aghast as each was made a commercial success by the buying public. Osbourne would later be dubbed the “Godfather of Heavy Metal.” Osbourne’s success continued into 1978, when he pursued a solo career while also trying out several bands, including the Ozzy Osbourne Band. His first solo album, Blizzard of Ozz, went multiplatinum, and others followed, including 1986’s Ultimate Sin, his highest charting studio album. Osbourne won his only Grammy Award for “I Don’t Want To Change The World” off his 1994 Live and Loud album. In 1995, he released Ozzmosis and returned to touring, dubbing his concert performances “The Retirement Sucks Tour.” He would proceed to sell 32 million solo albums, and his famous Ozzfest tours were attended by 5 million people. Later, he became renowned for his family’s reality TV show, “The Osbournes,” in which he was revealed to be a bit less sinister than his Prince of Darkness nickname implied. O
For 125 years, Johns Hopkins has pushed the boundaries of clinical, classroom and investigative medicine from its storied dome in Baltimore. That’s more than a century of knowledge, talent and innovation—all in one place. No matter where you live, a single call connects you with a personal guide to worldrenowned medical experts in every specialty. Ranked #1 by U.S. News and World Report for 20 consecutive years, we’ll coordinate every aspect of your trip—from appointments to travel arrangements and lodging—all tailored to your needs. Johns Hopkins USA, South Florida. Your personal link to Johns Hopkins Medicine. Please contact: M.L. Farrell, Director 561-659-1155 877-659-1155 (toll-free) firstname.lastname@example.org hopkinsmedicine.org/usa/florida
For more information, call 954-835-7000 or visit bankatlanticcenter.com.
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LATINO LEVITY George Lopez Brings Laughs To Hard Rock Live G
eorge Lopez has long since transcended his ironic Chicano standup shtick to become an American entertainment icon and talk show host â€“ but he can still fill a stage, winging his street-smart Mexican-American wisdom like Fernando Valenzuela pitching in a World Series game. Lopez, who brings his comedy to the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casinoâ€™s Hard Rock Live at 8 p.m. on February 25th, has garnered a wealth of source material from his many roles as an A-list celebrity. In addition to being a standup comedian, his rĂŠsumĂŠ includes being host of
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By Bill Bill Bowen Bowen By
â€œLopez Tonight,â€? dramatic film roles, twice the emcee of the Latin Grammy Awards, the 2004 Artist of the Year designation by Harvard University, performer at President Obamaâ€™s Inauguration Party, HBO sports analyst for â€œInside the NFL,â€? and one of Time magazineâ€™s 25 Most Influential Hispanics In America.
out of the cultural clash of misunderstandings and linguistic foibles that occur daily in the melting pot of L.A. These jokes are often delivered with his trademark wide-eyed look of incredulity as he pokes fun at his own ethnicity by exploiting the stereotypes of WASP-meetsMexican-American encounters.
Lopez, who first made a name for himself in the late â€™90s as a morning radio personality in Los Angeles, was the co-creator, writer, producer and star of the TV sitcom â€œGeorge Lopez,â€? in which he became one of the few Latinos to star in a situation comedy. His humor is often based on his ethnic roots, mining jokes
His comedy naturally appeals to Latino audiences and his routines are often sprinkled with asides in Spanish, depending on the venue. But no matter your background, this guy puts on a hilarious show. O For more information, call 954-797-5555 or visit hardrocklivehollywoodfl.com.
on scene media blitz
TERMS OF ENRICHMENT
â€œwhen only the extraordinary will doâ€Śâ€?
Shirley MacLaine Delivers Her Message At Kravis Center By Bill Bowen
hirley MacLaine entered show business with weak ankles, first when her own prompted her mother to enlist her in ballet classes and later when, as an understudy on Broadway, an ankle injury to actress Carol Haney landed MacLaine onstage as the lead in â€œThe Pajama Game.â€?
MacLaine, who conducts â€œAn Evening With Shirley MacLaineâ€? at the Raymond F. Kravis Center for the Performing Arts on February 8th at 8 p.m., probably wonâ€™t tell that story â€“ she might not even spend much time talking about the 50 films sheâ€™s made, the countless awards sheâ€™s won or the experience of working under Alfred Hitchcock in her first film role in 1955â€™s â€œThe Trouble With Harry.â€? Her brilliant Academy Award-winning performance as Aurora Greenway in â€œTerms Of Endearmentâ€? might garner a passing reference. Rather than discuss what makes her famous, MacLaine will talk about, well, whatever she feels like discussing. Things like her passions and beliefs, as unusual as some may find them. They include: astrology, numerology, spiritual life, aging, health, sacred sites, dreams and prophecy. Oh yes, and UFOs and phenomena, the environment, reincarnation and pets. Indeed, her interests are diverse, and sheâ€™s written books on various subjects, including which U.S. presidents believed in UFOs. On her Web site (shirleymaclaine.com), one can access an archive of 300 radio shows from Independent Expression Radio or view her â€œterrific collection of UFO videos.â€? Or watch her tap-dance with Lucy Ricardo. â€œI think we all choose the paths of our lives. I knew I wanted to be a â€˜communicatorâ€™ from the very beginning,â€? she writes on her site. â€œFor me the search for Truth is paramount... The truth of a character Iâ€™m playing, the truth of the subject matter I write about or the truth of why we are alive and how it relates to our destiny.â€? Truth is, Shirley MacLaine has a lot to talk about. O For more information, call 561-832-7469 or visit kravis.org.
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A GUIDE TO PERSONAL GROWTH
relations parents destinations
BRINGING SEXY BACK Frank Talk About Staying Frisky As We Age
By Emily J. Minor
hen Dr. Maureen Whelihan starts running behind schedule, her nurses pretty much know why. Sheâ€™s in that exam room with the door shut, again, talking about sex with a patient. â€œItâ€™s not really a discussion you can have in 15 minutes,â€? Dr. Whelihan says. Our sex lives, especially as we get older, might be one of those social taboos weâ€™re uncomfortable broaching, even with our closest girlfriends. Who wants to debate where to rub the Estrace cream when you can chat about the sale at Nordstrom? Besides, what if sheâ€™s having more sex than you? But for years, Dr. Whelihan, 49 â€“ a former nurse who now runs a private Ob/Gyn practice in West Palm Beach, along with the Center of Sexual Health & Education in West Palm Beach, Wellington and Charlotte, N.C. â€“ has been the doctor out there talking about sexual habits, from toys to technique to desire. When she gives a speech â€“ whether itâ€™s to a gang of medical doctors at a convention or to a Hadassah group at their monthly Boca Raton meeting â€“ she throws out all the terms, right down the middle.
Dr. Whelihan has been known to â€œIâ€™ve always had the ability to address make her male colleagues blush. sexual complaints in my Ob/Gyn patients without embarrassment or reserâ€œIâ€™m frank,â€? she admits. vation,â€? says Dr. Whelihan, who realizes other physicians may not have this But what sheâ€™s found through the knack. â€œNo oneâ€™s ever taught physicians years is that no matter the audience, how to discuss sexual pleasures, orfrank sexual discussion is fairly rare gasms, sexual behaviors, alternative in this society of ours, especially be- practices,â€? she says. â€œ(In medical school) tween doctors and patients. She we had one guy who came in and did a thinks it stems from religious and lunch lecture and he talked to us about cultural beliefs â€“ along with the fact sex. The problem was, he talked to us that they simply donâ€™t teach sexual about unconventional sex â€“ pedophilia, health in most medical schools. fetishes (and) state laws.â€?
After years of discussing sex with women of all ages, she knows what her patients â€“ especially the older ones â€“ want to talk about. And itâ€™s not state laws. The two biggest complaints in female patients ages 40 to 60 are vaginal dryness and a partnerâ€™s erectile dysfunction, and Dr. Whelihan says those are buoyed along with a host of other conditions: arthritis, high blood pressure, relationship issues, medicationsâ€Ś FEBRUARY 2011
thatâ€™s life relations â€œItâ€™s interesting,â€? she says. â€œPatients always start the conversation with, â€˜I love my husband, but... there are problems.â€™â€? She adds, â€œPatients are saddened by the loss of a good erection in their partner. He might not even want to cuddle, because he knows he canâ€™t perform.â€? These issues of sex, cuddling and alternatives to intercourse arenâ€™t unique, of course, and Lori Sarvis sees them frequently in her Deerfield Beach practice. Sarvis is a licensed clinical social worker who specializes in sex therapy. In the last few years, sheâ€™s seen more and more male patients come to her for help, many of them propelled into her office from the stress of a job loss, a stock market loss, or both.
have sex, but you still have the intimacy.â€?
Doctors and therapists caution safe sex, no matter what the age.
en out there having great sex. (Of course, Dr. Whelihan knew that.)
Karyn Rosenberg, a licensed clinical social worker who practices in Boca Raton, says she often finds that older men and women are enjoying some of the most exciting sex theyâ€™ve had in a while, especially if a former longtime partner was unwilling or inconsiderate.
At Dr. Whelihanâ€™s office, she felt as though there was so little research about sexual health that she enlisted the help of willing patients starting in March of 2009. Using a six-question survey that honed in on what drives womenâ€™s sexual desires, she collected data from 1,300 patients, ending her research in June of 2010. She and former newspaper reporter Anne Rodgers â€“ who for years wrote about
Women â€“ and weâ€™re talking older women, here â€“ watch pornography to get aroused. They discuss having had multiple partners in the past.
year-old marriage and now theyâ€™re single again,â€? she says. â€œItâ€™s scary, but it can also be a happy time. Some feel like teenagers again.â€?
women 45 and older for The Palm Beach Post â€“ have corroborated to turn the collection of anonymous â€“ thus honest â€“ responses into a book.
partnerships â€“ there are plenty of women having sex several times a week.
There is one problem with seniors having an active sex life, and thatâ€™s sexually transmitted diseases. â€œMen donâ€™t wear a condom because getting someone pregnant isnâ€™t an issue,â€? Sarvis says. â€œAnd some of these guys are seeing Ethel in the morning and Beatrice that night.â€?
They donâ€™t have a title or a publisher, but they think the subject matter will propel them forward.
â€œFor a woman whoâ€™s been widowed, maybe they were in a 50-
They smoke pot. â€œOne woman said that it makes her horny,â€? Dr. Whelihan explains. And with those in more customary relationships â€“ that is, male-female
â€œThe men today keep themselves in good shape,â€? Sarvis says. â€œThey want to live longer, and a lot of times theyâ€™ll come to me and say, â€˜I want to have a good sex life.â€™â€?
â€œMEN DONâ€™T WEAR A CONDOM BECAUSE GETTING SOMEONE PREGNANT ISNâ€™T AN ISSUE. AND SOME OF THESE
GUYS ARE SEEING ETHEL IN THE MORNING AND BEATRICE THAT NIGHT.â€? â€“ Lori Sarvis, licensed clinical social worker
Of course, there are many health conditions that can affect a manâ€™s sexual function. Diabetes. Heart disease. Obesity. Alcoholism. Sarvis says each partner has to be realistic about whatâ€™s possible and whatâ€™s not. An older man wonâ€™t have the staying power he did 25 years ago, yet at this stage he might want to cuddle and neck more. And other health needs â€“ be it an oxygen tank, colostomy bag or an arthritic knee â€“ might mean additional creativity in the bedroom. You take the good with the bad, Sarvis says. â€œYou just have to re-arrange it,â€? she says. â€œYou might change your positions and the length of time you 44
The result? In the past 10 years, STDs have doubled in the over-45 age group, according to the journal Sexually Transmitted Infections.
T H E B O C A R AT O N O B S E R V E R
â€œWhat weâ€™re finding out is the nature of sexual desire is just as ephemeral as we thought,â€? Rodgers says. â€œBut what weâ€™re trying to do is discern the differences between the decades and how it changes through a womanâ€™s lifetime.â€? And the one thing theyâ€™ve found is that there are plenty of over-50 wom-
Still, the frank Sex Talk is not a doctor-patient conversation that goes on everywhere. Dr. Whelihan still runs into colleagues who resist prescribing something as simple as hormone cream to treat the No. 1 complaint among her older patients: a dry vagina, which can make sex painful. â€œThereâ€™s no reason why any woman should be out there with a dry vagina,â€? she says. We told you she was frank. O
thatâ€™s life parents
Technology Allows Teens To Hide Romantic Relationships In Plain Sight By Cheryl Kane Heimlich
hen Barbara Hamiâ€™s teenage son acquired his first girlfriend this past summer, she found out the same way everyone else did: he changed his Facebook status from â€œsingleâ€? to â€œin a relationship.â€? Hami, who had avoided friending her children on Facebook in order to preserve their privacy, couldnâ€™t help snooping when her daughter told her the news. â€œSince he had named the girl,â€? she says, â€œwe immediately checked out her Facebook page and found she had done the same thing.â€? While Hami was happy that the computer had told her what her son didnâ€™t, she also feels that such a se-
needed to know simply by answering the kitchen phone and eavesdropping on our conversations. These days, even as our kids are texting, IM-ing and Facebook-chatting right under our noses, we often know little about who theyâ€™re talking to. Carolyn Kelley North, a marriage and family therapist in Boca Raton, says itâ€™s not uncommon for parents to be unaware that their teens are in a relationship. â€œThere is so much more access today in ways parents have no control over,â€? she says. â€œTeens can be more covert with Facebook and all the new media outlets, which makes it easy for them to plan to meet out somewhere and not have formal dates.â€?
â€œREMEMBER THAT IF YOU FREAK OUT WHEN THEY TELL YOU THINGS â€“ WHEN THEY TALK ABOUT SEX OR DRUGS OR WHATEVER â€“ YOUâ€™RE NOT
GOING TO GET THAT INFORMATION ANYMORE. JUST TAKE A BREATH AND RETURN TO THE ISSUE WHEN YOU CAN TALK ABOUT IT CALMLY.Ë? â€“ Carolyn Kelley North, marriage and family therapist cret never would have gotten past her own mother. â€œIn my day, the home phone was the method of communication for asking someone out,â€? she says. â€œWith that gone, the ringing of the phone is removed and everything is private. I think cell phones and Facebook actually take away the open communication between children and parents.â€? While teenagers have never been big on spilling the details of their romantic lives to their parents, our own mothers usually learned what they 46
T H E B O C A R AT O N O B S E R V E R
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thatâ€™s life parents My friend Paul, for example, was surprised to learn that his son had a girlfriend since the pair had been communicating mostly via text and online. â€œThe phone part of the cell phone was rarely used, so there was little audible conversation,â€? says Paul, who eventually gleaned information by sneaking glances at his sonâ€™s computer.
â€œDATING NOW FOR TEENS IS VERY DIFFERENT COMPARED TO WHEN THEIR PARENTS DATED. KIDS ACTUALLY
CONSIDER THEMSELVES DATING ONLINE. THAT CAN BE SAFER IN A WAY, BUT IT ALSO DISCOUNTS BEING TOGETHER PERSON-TO-PERSON.â€? â€“ Dr. Wendy Fader, psychologist
â€œHe left his Facebook page open enough times to see photos of them together and some of their comments â€“ not that we were spying or anything,â€? he says. â€œBut I remember it being a big first step when he graduated from hiding her from family to introducing her to everyone at an outdoor party.â€? Dr. Wendy Fader, a Boca Raton psychologist, says many teen relationships never even make it past the texting and chatting stage. For some kids, thatâ€™s as much interaction as theyâ€™re ready to handle. â€œDating now for teens is very different compared to when their parents dated,â€? she explains. â€œKids actually consider themselves dating online. That can be safer in a way, but it also discounts being together person-to-person.â€? Fader says parents who learn their teens are â€œin a relationshipâ€? shouldnâ€™t hesitate to ask what that means to them. â€œThis sounds ridiculously basic, but what is the definition to your child about what a boyfriend or girlfriend is?â€? she asks. â€œThey may say, â€˜I have a boyfriendâ€™ just because they talk to a boy in the hallway.â€? That was the case for my friend 48
Bobbi, whose son started to â€œask outâ€? girls in the fifth grade. â€œIt wasnâ€™t really dating,â€? she says. â€œHe hardly ever saw the girls outside of school and just texted with them.â€? Now that her son is in high school, though, Bobbi thinks all that electronic socializing has taught him a lot about communicating with the opposite sex. â€œHe has a ton of (platonic) friends who are girls, and he seems to be very comfortable and close with them,â€? she says. Yet his long-distance romance with a girlfriend from summer camp is one subject that remains offlimits to his parents. â€œHe is pretty secretive about the whole thing,â€? she says. â€œI hope he will share more with us when he is ready.â€? My friend Meredith, who met her own husband at summer camp 25 years ago, sometimes wonders whether their long-distance romance would
T H E B O C A R AT O N O B S E R V E R
have blossomed the same way in todayâ€™s electronic world. â€œThereâ€™s no question that we would have done a lot more e-mail and a lot less phone calls and letters,â€? she says. â€œIt would have cost us a lot less to stay in touch with each other. But I think thereâ€™s a certain privacy and intimacy to a letter that doesnâ€™t exist in e-mail. I liked his handwriting, and the fact that he took the time to write down his feelings. Saying â€˜I love youâ€™ in an e-mail just doesnâ€™t feel quite as strong as writing it in a card.â€? Of course, Meredith and her husband are an unusual case; these days, not too many people end up marrying their high school sweethearts. Which is why North says parents should warn their kids that any â€œprivateâ€? e-mails, texts and photos they send are unlikely to remain that way forever. â€œThese teenage relationships are shortlived, and sometimes the girl ends up forwarding the boy (an intimate) pic-
ture or something they did not intend for anyone else to see,â€? she says. â€œEventually that couple is going to break up. And when that happens, the whole school is going to see that image.â€? Although conversations like that may be uncomfortable for both you and your child, North says that shouldnâ€™t stop you from having them. â€œRemember that if you freak out when they tell you things â€“ when they talk about sex or drugs or whatever â€“ youâ€™re not going to get that information anymore,â€? she says. â€œJust take a breath and return to the issue when you can talk about it calmly. â€œThey may pretend that they donâ€™t care what you think, they may seem like they are looking away and not participating in the conversation,â€? she adds. â€œBut in actuality, they really are listening. I think parents really underestimate the amount of power they have in influencing their kids.â€? O
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thatâ€™s life destinations
VEGAS, BABY Vdara Hotel & Spa Provides Access To The Action â€“ Or Escape From It All By Roberta Sandler
f youâ€™re looking for a vacation that pulses with the glamour and excitement of Las Vegas â€“ minus the noisy smoke-filled casinos â€“ Vdara Hotel & Spa may be the place for you.
This environmentally friendly property is smoke-free, and thereâ€™s neither a slot machine nor gaming table to be found. Rather, this exclusive boutique space is designed to provide chic respite after a long night (and day) of gambling and otherwise whooping it up elsewhere. Not that there isnâ€™t plenty to do: Vdara Hotel & Spa is located at CityCenter, a fabulous 67-acre retail and residential complex that opened last December with elite hotels, nightclubs, restaurants, stores and more. The propertyâ€™s centerpiece is Crystals, a mammoth three-level entertainment district with great signature res50
taurants owned by celebrities and celebrity chefs (thereâ€™s a Latin steakhouse by Eva Longoria Parker, a pub by Chef Todd English and two ventures by Chef Wolfgang Puck) and shopping galore (retailers include Louis Vuitton, Tom Ford and Roberto Cavalli). And, since the hotel is ideally sandwiched between CityCenterâ€™s new ARIA Resort & Casino and the Bellagio hotel on the Vegas strip, gambling is just a short walk away. Like Vdara Hotel & Spaâ€™s motto says, guests can get â€œaccess to Vegas or escape from it all.â€? The hotel is relatively new, having opened in December 2009 as a joint venture between MGM Resorts International and Infinity World Development Corporation, a subsidiary of Dubai World. Even in a landscape as striking as the Vegas strip, the 57story building stands out architec-
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