BE IRRESISTIBLE IS A COMPREHENSIVE ONLINE
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My older clients tell me dating was easier back in the day. All a gal had to do was go out and sit at a table with her friends, and men would come up and talk to her.
Nowadays, if you go out with your friends, the only people you talk to end up being the same people you came with.
It’s not like that everywhere, of course. But I hear this complaint so often by the women I coach. They’re frustrated that there’s no way to meet men aside from dating apps. The world has changed.
There are more single people now than ever.
Imagine you’re playing a board game with this really cute, amazing guy. You can tell he really likes you, too. Eventually, you notice that every time you play this game with him, you end up winning. So you start paying closer attention to how he’s playing… And, sure enough, he’s setting you up to win every time.
You can guess why he’s doing this. He wants you to feel good about yourself. He wants you to enjoy your experience.
When you meet a wonderful person and fall in love, it feels like fireworks bursting in the sky. It feels like you’ve opened the door to your soul and let someone in. It feels like you’re not alone anymore. Two have become one.
You don’t want to be apart from him for even a minute. You feel what he feels. You do what he does. And in that merging, which is such a beautiful part of new love, you can sometimes lose yourself.
Linda was tired.
She was in her mid-fifties and didn’t look like she used to. Her face, her hair, her twenty pounds of extra weight… made her wonder what any man would see in her. She came to me for help recovering from heartbreak after she’d met a man online. She felt stuck, obsessing about this man and too discouraged to try dating again. “I’m too old for this,” she told me. I asked Linda to tell me all the factors that she thought made her ineligible for love.
She reeled off a list. Her age, her weight, her appearance. She wasn’t very interesting, she wasn’t good at texting, she didn’t have any exciting hobbies. She looked at me. “Do you need more? I can keep going.” “And all those things disqualify you from love?”
I asked. “Yes.”
That’s where I knew our work needed to begin.
