Volume 84, Issue 5
Friday, June 16th, 2023
Delegates Go Bananas About New Holiday By Brady Hood
men’s mental health are planned for the celebration. Rosales continues, “The Harambe Unity In May of 2016, following a child falling Festival will also feature two keynote addresses into the enclosure, the western lowland gorilla Haon preserving this state’s beautiful environment rambe was shot and killed and fully facing the epiby the Cincinnati Zoo demic of crises in the response team. Following field of men’s mental this event, Harambe behealth.” came a nationally loved Rosales said “Harambe is phenomenon for digital a token we’ve all loved humor and animal rights. and laughed at during After a push for bipartiour youth.” Executive sanship and men’s mental Secretary William Kohut health from the Governor, added, “We all think of a bill was proposed to laughing and good times dedicate June 16th as when we think of Ha“Harambe Unity Day.” rambe, despite the prior “The purpose of tragedy.” Harambe Unity Day is to The government believes showcase the unity of Harambe can give the Buckeye Boys State,” said citizens of American Nationalist Liaison Kyler Legion Buckeye Boys Lunsford of Zulch City. State a symbol to all He emphasized unite under and a happy “channeling the spirit of face to promote well Harambe.” Chief of Staff being. The Governor’s Saul Rosales added, office has labeled Ha“[Harambe Unity Day is] “Gorilla Warfare” rambe as a light for bibridging the divides of chaDrawing By Elden Slack partisanship and male menos.” tal health. “Events of Harambe Unity Day are being To celebrate the proposed holiday, the decided upon by a committee chaired by the Lt. committee suggested a fun fest along with keyGovernor,” said Rosales. He emphasized that it is note speeches about the values instilled by Ha“a special committee.” rambe. This committee is working toward incorThe meaning of Harambe could change, porating the first Harambe Unity Day celebration and it is our decision if we will keep laughing or as part of the afternoon festivities. start caring. Speeches on the subjects of unity and