Appearance anxiety

You are so fat You eyes are so small Your btreast are so samll

APPEARANCE ANXIETY

You don’t have abodominal

You skin is terrible Your teeth are so ugly

You don’t look like woman You look so ugly You look so dirty Your legs are so shot

Have you ever felt that you are ugly?

Have you ever considered plastic surgery?

Do you feel dissatisfied with any part of your body?

In the information era, where the internet is filled with countless beautiful women, many people are invisibly comparing their appearance and have triggered appearance anxiety as a result. In China, white skin, big eyes, a high-bridge nose, a slim body, and youthfulness are regarded as the mainstream aesthetics.

Many people are constrained by the mainstream aesthetic and need to wear very delicate makeup every day. They make sure their skin looks flawless, be able to wear small size clothes, not have any excess fat, and be full of smiles every day. Aesthetics should not be defined and each person is unique.

Under the perfect makeup photos, there hides a girl's ultimate pursuit of beauty under the Chinese standardized aesthetics, and eventually, she will break all this definition of beauty and present a most real self.

Thanks to Ms. Mao Zhihong for providing the costumes and makeup props Every person's appearance should not be defined. Be yourself.

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Content Part 1: Pretend to be perfect 4-11page

Part 2: Collapse 12-19page

Part 3: Break through the restrictions 20-29page

Part 4: Daily 30-37page

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Pretend to be perfect I grew up been instilled with the idea that the standard of a beautiful woman must be white, tall, and thin.

White refers to delicate fair skin. There is a Chinese saying that goes: white covers ugly, which means girls who have flawless and fair skin are regarded as beautiful women.

High refers to those who are tall or have long legs. Even when you are good-looking, if you are not tall enough, then you will never have the aura and temperament as those who are tall.

Thin is easier to understand. It means people should never be fat but skinny. Fat never looks good and one can’t be a beautiful woman if she’s fat. And people require a woman to be gentle, elegant, cheerful and always smiling. They also ask women to be innocent, young, and energetic.

Growing up in this environment, I always had been taking good skincare and sun protection and brightening when necessary. I started to control my diet when I was still growing. At one point I felt I was gaining weight and then relied on diet and taking diet pills to control my weight and figure. Because it was hard for me to change my height and body proportions, I made myself getting used to wearing high heels to make my legs look longer. I worked hard to meet these standards as if that would make me beautiful in the mainstream aesthetic. This kind of aesthetic became part of my life, but it is also a kind of shackle or a kind of cage that I could not get rid of.

I occasionally ask myself is that the real me? I seem to be pretending to be perfect all the time.

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PART 1 END

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Content

Before shooting this set of photos, I was taken down by a fever which made me dizzy and also made me came up with the idea to do some styling and makeup that I hadn't tried before. I abandoned my previous makeup customs, such as using foundation to cover my skin until there are no flaws, no pores or pimples visible, delicate eye makeup, no smudging, no lipstick applied asymmetrically or to the outside of my mouth, and wearing a wig without showing my original hair. In terms of clothing, I wore halter dresses that I would not normally wear. In terms of behavior, I never went through the trash. And I didn't smile at the camera during the photo shoot. I seemed broken, but I was having fun.

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PART 2 END

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Break through the restrictions In this set of photos, I challenged myself to go nude. I showed my body and face in front of the camera. I no longer dwelled on my small breasts, imperfect features, and narrow shoulders. I accepted my most real self. In addition, for the first time, I put myself into a dust bag; for the first time, I used non-woven shoe covers to create my makeup and look; for the first time, I stuffed fake pearls into my mouth (this might cause accidental ingestion, please do not imitate)；and also for the first time, I challenged to shoot in the bathroom with the shower on. I pushed the limits of myself.

In this set of photos, I imagined myself as a fish, and the bathroom is the fish tank where I live.

‘Fish are supposed to live freely in a river but they are captured by humans and forced to put on a gorgeous coat, trapped in a tank where they cannot move freely and are left to be watched. They have been trying to escape but there is nothing they can do.’

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PART 3 END

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Daily This is a set of photos I took when I was removing my makeup. The makeup remover oil smudged my lipstick, which reminded me of how I used to be afraid of removing my makeup for a while because it was like a protective shell for me and I didn't want to face my veiled self. The blood in the piece represents what others say about my appearance, which makes me mad and hurt, but these kinds of mean words are visible every day, both in virtual and reality.

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PART 4 END

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Everyone is unique, don't be anxious about your appearance. Do whatever looks you want to do. Do whatever you want to do. Don't worry about what others think because you are priceless.

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