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door knobs and leaping asians since 1971. | Wednesday, September 7, 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01 .

In This Issue Like contests and prizes?

Bandersnatch is having a “Six Word Novel” contest. This idea is based on Ernest Hemingway’s line, “For sale: baby shoes, never worn.” Submit your entries by Friday, September 16 at bandersnatchpaper@gmail.com and the winner will receive a surprise!

Sixth time’s the charm?

The woes of a CEGEP student

News, page 4

Opinions, page 9

Now in the international media spotlight, the world waits to see how Noda will deal the troublesome rising of the Japanese yen, the national debt and the Fukushima crisis left to him by former Prime Minister Kan.

Sections Campus Life .................................................... 1

Well everyone, it’s that time of year again. Put away your bathing suits and hang up your rock’ n roll shoes because it’s time to get back on track.

News ................................................................ 4 Arts ................................................................... 6 Games ...............................................................8 Opinions ...........................................................9 Sports .............................................................11

Wednesday, September 7, 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01 - 1..


BANDERSNATCH

STM: Students’ Thieved Minutes Julia Weber Contributer

From my house in Dollard, getting to Abbott is only about a 25 minute drive. But, I take the bus. So, for all of my 8:30am classes, I leave my house at 6:35 am to get to class on time. That’s one hour and a half extra to get to school; which is an hour and a half less sleep per day, and seven and a half hours per week. That’s an entire night’s worth of valuable snooze time gone with the wind. Why? Because the other alternative is less than desirable. Because the next bus to Fairview passes at 7:30am, and is as packed as a can of tuna. The vehicle fills to the brim with students, back packs, and body odour. Something as simple as standing suddenly becomes complex and awkward. Arms in. Bag on the floor. Hold on—to whatever you can—tightly. Keep your head down. If you move it the wrong way, you might accidentally lock lips with your neighbor. No, sweetheart! This cold sore just can’t be! I didn’t cheat, I swear! And then, once you get to Fairview, you expect to get on the 210. But be prepared! Up until this Monday, the 210 was running on its Summer schedule. That meant fewer busses and

Dispatch from the Chief Alexander Messina Editor-in-Chief

It’s that time of year again. That time of the year when we get back to the studies we unceremoniously dumped in that unused corner of our brains at the beginning of the summer. We have memories of our vacations fresh in our minds and brace ourselves for the oncoming storm that is college. Whether you’re a student who just came out of high school or a veteran who’s looking into the future with a passionate gaze, we all have a few things in common: we have the desire to succeed in all that we attempt, we have endless possibilities ahead of us, and, I would argue most important of them all, a community that supports us in our every endeavour. If you take the time to look, you’ll see that John

more people waiting at the stop. The line up gets to look something like the Great Wall of China. No wonder people start forming a second one before the first bus even arrives! But, if you have a class to get to, don’t get be tempted for a better spot in the second line. Ignore your desire to be comfortable. Make sure you get on the first 210 that shows up, even if it means squeezing up next to the bus driver himself. If you don’t, there’s a good chance you’ll be crossing paths with your teacher as he’s leaving class. The STM needs to wake up. We

need more buses, more often. And not just the busses that go to school. We need more frequent ones that get us to the Fairview Terminus to begin with. Now, if you haven’t already heard, in January, our beloved 210 will be rechristened the “419”. I know, I know. Tragic. But if you ask me, before the STM starts flaunting a new name for our Abbott bus, they should think about a couple of things. For example, Fall for Abbott starts in August, not in September. So this new “419”, a bus primarily for students, needs to start taking into account the needs of its clientele. Until then, is it still safe to hitchhike?

John Abbott College 21275 Lakeshore Road P.O. Box 2000 Sainte-Anne-de-Bellevue, Quebec, Canada H9X 3L9 Phone: (514) 457-6610 ext. 5389 Fax: (514) 457-6091 Office: H-041 Web: http://www.bandersnatch.ca/ E-mail: bandersnatchpaper@gmail.com

Alexander Messina Editor-in-Chief

Nevada McEniry-Hatajlo Assistant Editor-in-Chief

Julianna Astorino Campus Life Editor

Louisa Bielig News Editor

Available Entertainment Editor

Jennifer Smiley Arts Editor

Bee Clarke Opinions Editor

Available Games and Tech Editor

Henry Park Sports Editor

Sarah Tayeh Production Manager

Available Assistant Production Manager

Available Office Manager

Available Media Administrator

Available Webmaster

Abbott is much more than just a school. It’s a place where a wide variety of people can meet and create links in between themselves through mutual interests. If you are a person who likes to spend time applying yourself in your studies, we have a large variety of facilities to help you out. If you’re the type of person who likes to relax in between classes and meet new people, you’ll find some interesting things to do on campus: whether it’s at the gym or outside on our beautiful campus. If however, you are looking to get involved in day-to-day campus life, you could find a great place here at Bandersnatch. Bandersnatch is the studentrun Alternative Press at John Abbott College. We pride ourselves in delivering a source of news that represents and embodies the view of students here at Abbott and in doing that, we encourage all to participate and help us create this

Wednesday, September 7, 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01 - 2..

paper. If you have any interest in writing, graphic design, journalism, reporting, art, music, sports or videogames, we would love for you to come and contribute in the making of this paper. If you do, I promise you that you will not only meet some of the most passionate and interesting people in this school, but you’ll also have some of the best fun you can get as a student in college. Whether we’re hanging out in the club room, discussing the paper at meetings, producing it or delivering it, we’re always having a good time. With that said, my colleagues and I would like to introduce you to the 41st volume of Bandersnatch. Even if you have no interest in contributing, we hope you’ll come to enjoy what we have to offer as journalists and pick up an issue every second week! We are after all, the voice of the students and we will make sure that you get heard.

Bandersnatch is a student run alternative press at John Abbott College. It is published every two weeks and is partially funded by the Student Activities Commitee and by advertising solicited customers. Submissions are welcome and become property of Bandersnatch. Submissions must be sent via e-mail to bandersnatch@gmail. com and must be in Plain Text format (.txt) or Microsoft Word Document format (.doc). All submissions must include the full name and telephone number of the contributor, as well as the e-mail address if applicable. Bandersnatch reserves the right to reject submissions or to edit any submissions for length, legality, or clarity. Submissions should be a minimum of 350 words and a maximum of 650 words. Articles lower or above these parameters may be printed at the discretion of the executives. Spelling and grammar will not be corrected on submissions as it is the responsibility of the contributor to correct them. If you should have any questions or concerns, please contact us at our e-mail indicated above or visit us at the Bandersnatch office, located in the basement of Herzberg, room H-041 (across from the hallway entrance of The Oval).


Science Building: There is a light at the end of the tunnel

The students of John Abbott’s Science, Honours Science, and Art and Science programs are currently using rooms that, like much of the John Abbott classrooms, have old and wobbly furniture that cause one’s hand to slip down the page of a graph paper, consequently ruining a lab report, causing a frustrating situation. Thus, the science students anxiously wait too see the new science

building as a finished product. The science students will be extremely pleased with the plans for the new science building, that will have two learning centers, and a floor for each individual science sector, i.e. a floor for physics, a floor for chemistry, et cetera. The students, at least in sciences, will no longer need to complain about the teacher’s notes on the blackboard being unreadable, because according to the IT and Communications Director at the College who, since last year is replacing the Director of Facilities

Welcome back ever yone! Your Student Union would like to cordially welcome the student body to John Abbott College. It’s going to be a wonderful year! This year’s SUJAC Executive members are here once again to defend the rights of the students and ensure that a great College experience is had by all. This year’s SUJAC Exec’s are as follows: President, Courtney Lister; VP Internal, Lauren Maloney; VP Academic, Robyn Ochiai; VP Finance, Alex Levis; and VP External, Allison O’Neil. Congress seats are now open for Pre-University and Technology

students! Come pick up a Nomination form in the SUJAC of f ice, P-101, and f ind out how you can get involved and be a voice for the student population! Submission deadline is Thursday, September 8, at 4 pm. There are also two (2) seats available on John Abbott’s Board of Governors—the highest decisionmaking board of the College. Nomination Forms are available in SUJAC, P-101, and submission deadline is: Wednesday, September 7, 4:00 pm. Come vote at the school-wide election to take place on Tuesday, Sept. 20 (10 am – 4 pm) outside

Jennifer Smiley Arts Editor

Management stated that “the implementation will be gradual and how many will be their next year is still to be determined. Wiring is being done for all the rooms, but not all the rooms will have proctors on day one.” Hence, the Science Building is a significant progress in JAC’s science sector, and it also allows for more classroom space in the older buildings, making it convenient for all who attend the college. Unfortunately, there will be some minor inconveniences staff and students will have to deal with during the course of the construction process. For instance, those of you who have classes in H-001 know that it will be closed off for the next 5 to 6 weeks due to construction. The contractor working on the installation of the new generator, that will support the science building, needs to break a cement pillar near H-001 in order to complete his project. Fortunately, this work will be done between 6:00 a.m. to 8:30 a.m. to minimize noise and disruption throughout the day. C o n s e qu e n t l y, Wendy Stoddart of A c a d e m i c Scheduling and Registration has MIOed students who have classes in H-001 informing them that they will be relocated

to LB-211, or H-422, but there is still the possibility that the room may change, and to keep checking your MIOs accordingly. The attendants of John Abbott College know that the Arctic Circle was closed in order to do structural work, because the main entrance of the new building will go directly through the Arctic Circle. Though the Artic Circle is open now, it may need to close again during the course of the year, hopefully when it is not too cold outside. Students anticipation for the new science building will be satisfied by the end of April, or early May, the expected finishing date. Unfortunately, the courtyard will still be muddy from construction, as it will be the last thing finished, but the Science Building is sure to be a positive addition to John Abbott College. It will be worth the wait.

Casgrain Theatre (advance poll in SUJAC on Monday, Sept. 19, 10 am – 4 pm). Clubs are starting up again so be sure to check out the JAC Portal to join a Club! If you have an interest and think others might want to form a Club with you, come to SUJAC to f ind out how to start up your own Club. A big thanks goes out to the John Abbott student body for your contribution towards the new Athletic Field which held its opening ceremony on Saturday, August 27, 2011. The Islanders demonstrated incredible sportsmanship, yet again!

Congratulations to you all. For more information, please feel free to drop by the SUJAC off ice located in P-101 – the door is always open to help you help JAC!

Wednesday, September 7, 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01 - 3..


Irene, only the ninth of this season Alexia Oprean Contributor

What only appeared to be a post-tropical storm over Montreal on Sunday, August 28, had left deep marks over the whole east coast of North America. No hurricane in history has ever passed through so many major cities in a row, especially none New York since 1985. In addition, it’s only half way through the Atlantic hurricane season and there are a 10th and 11th one on their way, whereas in other years there have been only around 12 tempests in a whole season. As a category 1 hurricane, Irene had passed Puerto Rico, the Dominican Republic and Haiti and reached the Bahamas as a category 3 hurricane. Irene entered the mainland of South Carolina on August 26, and caused several power outages and destruction, f looding and high winds on the coast and on the mainland through torrential rain. Further up north, many people fretfully left New York, or were evacuated as the

Governor of New York had ordered in fear of being criticized again. Public transport and airports were shut down, and Manhattan was evacuated before Saturday. To the surprise of many, Irene decreased to a less threatening tropical storm before hitting New York; nevertheless, it left a f looded Manhattan and power outages behind. By the next morning, except for new anger encountered towards the media’s and the governor’s overreaction, almost everything seemed to function again. By Sunday afternoon, the last clouds of the 700 mile wide storm had moved up north through Boston toward Quebec and New Brunswick, before it disappeared in Labrador’s direction. The posttropical storm caused f looded rivers and houses, fallen branches and many households, especially in Montreal area, had power outages. Hydro Quebec states that at Irene’s power peek, 250,000 clients had lost electricity and also mentioned that all power should be back by Wednesday at the latest. In New Brunswick, 30

Japan’s sixth minister: will he last? Brendan McGarry Contributor

In light of Japan’s recent natural and nuclear disasters, a sudden political shift occured this past week when Japanese Prime Minister Naoto Kan resigned on August 26 due to his unpopular handling of the Fukushima nuclear plant crisis. Shortly after his resignation, previous Minister of Finance Yoshihiko Noda won the role of President of the Democratic Party of Japan in a runoff election, which led directly, by tradition, to his formal appointment as Prime Minister by the Emperor. After his mishandling of the Fukushima crisis, Kan barely survived a no-confidence motion brought about by senior members of his party. The controversial decision was his order to not use sea water to cool the overheating, radiative nuclear reactor, despite having only consulted a small group of political aids who knew little about nuclear energy. He had little communication with TEPCO, the owner of Fukushima and five other crucial nuclear plants, and when he issued the order, the manager of the main plant refused to comply. Another blunder

was that Japan had only ordered an evacuation with a radius of 13 miles, while the US National Research Council later recommended a 50 mile evacuation radius. In short, Kan’s handling of the situation was deemed disastrous. Many attempts were made to topple his leadership, and he eventually stepped down immediately after the passage of a debt bill and a renewable energy bill, saying he expected to “see his successor in office [within the] week.” Now in the international media spotlight, the world waits to see how Noda will deal the troublesome rising of the Japanese yen, the national debt and the Fukushima crisis left to him by former Prime Minister Kan. On September 2nd, the day of Noda’s induction as Prime Minister, he said at a news conference in Tokyo, “[Fukushima] takes greater priority over anything else,” largely to placate the outraged public, the critical political opposition and even his own ruling Democratic Party of Japan. In addition, Noda also stated that decontamination of evacuated areas would take place as soon as possible in order to allow evacuees to return home. Despite his alleged priority of solving the nuclear crisis

Wednesday, September 7, 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01 - 4.

houses were f looded due to heavy rain and in Quebec, one person died as a road was washed out by the water of the f looded Yamaska river. In total, 50 people were unaccounted for as a consequence of Irene. Many lost their homes which were destroyed by the hurricane or washed away as in Paterson, New Jersey. The town was later visited by president Obama this Sunday, and declared the most f looded area

in the US. Generally speaking, recovery started right away, as authorities informed citizens about their intervention possibilities right away. Even though some people might have lost everything, we should remember that we are only halfway through the hurricane season.

that led to the country’s fifth prime minister being defenestrated from office, another statement Noda issued may be his real aim; to reduce political infighting and instability in Japan. The newest prime minister also told reporters that a priority is to form closer diplomatic ties with the US. In dealing with the nuclear crisis, Japan sought aid from its fellow economic giant, the United States, for analysis and counseling . Now Noda seeks the US’s help in halting the

accelerating increase of the value of the Japanese yen, which the other country readily provides due to fear that the currency’s destabilization would jar the global economy. Having firmly secured his country’s three foremost concerns--Fukushima, the endangered yen, and most importantly, the country’s political future--Noda may be the first of the six prime ministers in the past five years to hold his post and provide Japan with much-needed direction and stability. Only time will tell.


U n d e r t h e m i c ro s c o p e

No end in sight

Wikileaks leaks

After hurricane “Irene” caused devastation in the US last week, the next catastrophe has already followed. On Saturday September 3, typhoon “Talas” reached Japan’s west coast and caused heavy rains, landslides and severe flooding. Many streets and bridges were completely destroyed: tens of thousands of people have lost their homes. 26 people died and at least 50 people are still unaccounted for. Survivors fear for the lives of their relatives who are still stuck under the masses of waste and ruins that cover especially huge parts of the Wakayama prefecture. The worst damage was caused on the Kii peninsula, where most living areas were severely destroyed. “Talas” had previously hit the Shikoku Island and left more than 40,000 households without electricity. This new calamity is a crucial test for new Prime Minister Noda during his first week in office. He assured to the affected families that he would “do everything possible to help” and ordered the military to assist the police and fire fighters in their effort to

With Louisa Bielig

How credible is an organization that publishes classified information, if its own data is leaked and available for months on the internet? This is a question that WikiLeaks will have to face after handling sensitive data about US diplomatic cables and informants in a negligent manner. The non-profit organization that was launched in 2006 frequently obtains classified information from anonymous sources and publishes them on its website to reveal unethical or corrupt behaviour throughout international governments and corporations. It is clearly stated on the official Wikileaks website that it “provide[s] an innovative, secure, and anonymous way for sources to leak information to [its] journalists”. This seemed credible until now; the support, however, might decrease considerably after the controversial organization around Australian internet activist Julian Assange published their entire archive of ca 250,000 secret US diplomatic cables. Those files contain names and data about US intelligence service informants; thousands of them are labeled as

potentially threatened. Those lives have been put in danger, and it is even more disturbing that their data was already leaked months ago. When Julian Assange told a BBC journalist the password for the secret US government cables, he might not have known that this information would be published in a book about him and be therefore available to the public online, but it was certainly a dangerous move. Now Wikileaks is in the pillory and has to accept that it is not perfectly safe itself, but it will quite certainly continue to reveal information that should be available to the public at all times.

EU imposes sanctions due to violence in Syria Chloe Brynen Contributor

The European Union imposed sanctions against Syria on Friday, September 2nd, prohibiting oil imports from the Middle Eastern nation. This move follows the Obama administration’s Syrian oil ban and their sanctions against several Syrian of f icials and f irms. Supporters of the oil embargo hope that it will f inancially cripple Syria and force president Bashar al-Assad to step down. According to a EU trade spokesperson, Syria earned 4.4 billion dollars through oil sales to the European bloc last year. However, some critics believe the European Union’s most recent actions are insuf f icient and come too late. The oil embargo includes an Italian clause, which allows companies with existing contracts to continue their business with Syria into November. Ricken Pitel – executive director for the humanitarian group Avaaz – called on other EU nations to “shame Italy” into adopting immediate sanctions. Russia also blasted the European sanctions, saying that they “will

lead to nothing good”. Both Russia and China have threatened to block any attempts at an arms embargo. The oil embargo comes on the heels of the Assad regime’s increased violence against protestors. During the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, the Syrian Observator y for Human Rights estimated that 360 civilians were killed, including 25 children and 14 women. Just last weekend’s death tolls are estimated to count around 50 victims. These most recent casualties bring the total civilian death toll to approximately 2200 since the rioting began f ive months ago. Amnesty International also believes 88 people – 10 of them children – have died in captivity during the past f ive months. More than 10,000 people have been imprisoned so far, and it is not known how many of them are actually still alive. The conf irmed deaths “appear to be an extension of the same brutal disdain for life that we are seeing daily on the streets of Syria” , Amnesty International’s Syria researcher, Neil Sammonds, said in a statement on the

humanitarian organization’s website. The researcher adds that there are accounts of torture being inf licted on children as young as 13 in Syrian detention centers. Under those conditions, it appears almost as a success that the Red Cross was granted access to a hospital in Damascus last week. Nevertheless, conf licts have spilled over into hospitals, where armed soldiers reportedly stormed in, attempting to steal the bodies of the dead and wounded. Reports of security

minimize damages. Over 20,000 people were asked to leave their homes and to seek shelter outside the threatened regions, where destroyed infrastructure and mud slides will complicate reconstruction efforts. Typhoon “Talas”, which was the most destructive typhoon since 2004, is now heading north over the sea, but meteorologists have already forecasted new storms to hit Western and Eastern Japan this week.

forces raiding mosques during prayer have also been circulating. One activist in Damascus warned that “nowhere is safe.” Despite a steady increase in violence since the uprisings began in March, the protestors calling for Mr. Assad to step down maintain that they will keep protesting. However, Mr. Assad – whose family has been in power for forty years – still enjoys a large degree of support from Syrian business elite and the middle class.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01 - 5.


The Person with a Hole in Their Heart Kenjah Banfield Contributor

Look at me and what do you see? Someone as happy as can be. If only you looked clearly, you’d know about this hole in my heart The one that makes me feel alone and sets me apart. For a long time I’ve been trying to find the remedy The remedy that will fix this hole in me. Now I see that loneliness does not haunt me because the amount of people around me is not enough But due to the lack of connection, not

Breakdown Patricia Fitzgibbon Contributor

enough love. So with this understanding I went out into the world And found that boy or girl. That set me free By trying to really get to know me. This is how this hole got filled.

Secret Delights Alexandra Brullo Contributor

I slide into the tub, a squelching sound bounces off the white linoleum walls, ringing perfectly in my ears. One foot then the other, I take deep cleansing breaths, and finally submerge myself within the squirming, gelatinous mass of warm worms. They crawl over my goose pimpled skin, warming my body instantly. They

topple over my flesh, flopping over my appendages. I sigh in contentment, my whole body relaxing, muscles unclenching, no longer sore from a hard day of work. As my body sinks lower into the tub, worms overflow over the brim, thudding softly to the carpeted floor. A big fat juicy worm has made its way between my chest, to my shoulder and is now latching itself to my lip, suctioning itself into place. I smile, calmly, gently opening up my lips and welcoming the plump morsel into my already salivating mouth. Chomp! My lips smack together, my teeth grinding, and mashing the gooey worm until I swallow, humming sweetly. I splash my hands around the tub, worms wiggling between my fingers and dangling off my blunt fingertips. I scoop up a large amount and let it drip over my head; let it trickle through my fingers. Worms crawl through my hair and fall onto the tops of my breasts. They make their way through my legs and caress my thighs

and hips, tickling me, leaving a pleasant tingle behind. I shudder in absolute euphoria as I open up the hot and cold taps and more worms pour out through the two taps. Overflowing, waves of fat, wiggly, gooey, creepy, crawly worms swarm out and tackle my body down. Pushing me underneath the undertow of worms, I break out of the swarm, taking a gasping breath. Feeling clean and relaxed, I lift my body out of the porcelain tub and towel myself dry. Pulling the plug, hundreds of worms get sucked down the drain.

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Wednesday, September 7 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01 - 7..


Potterless Bee Clarke Opinions Editor

If there are two things you need to know about me, it’s that firstly, I’m adorable, and secondly, I am a huge Harry Potter fan. Yeah, I’m one of those kids. The ones who dressed up for the midnight release of the Deathly Hallows Part Two, sobbed the whole way through it, wears her hallows necklace as if its surgically attached to her and had a severe case of Post-Potter Depression. Say what you want, it’s my childhood, and I love it. So, as you can imagine, when J. K. Rowling announced Pottermore, I was over the moon. It had such promise; such hope. An online experience with a new look at all the books, brand new information, and stories about my favorite characters, alongside all my fellow Potter fans. Once on Pottermore, however, I was nothing but disappointed. I feel like the other fans and I have been treated badly. It became very apparent, very quickly, that Pottermore isn’t so much a site for fans by fans (as promised with the announcement of the Beta site), but just a publicity

Up and coming games Sarah Tayeh Production Manager

This was an unusual summer to say the least where games are concerned. Normally during the summer I crawl under a rock and a wait for the smell of autumn leaves to awaken and turn on my gaming consoles to hear the sounds of a new play worthy game whirling away. However this summer was different the strange murmurings of promised fun roused me from my slumber and had me taking a bus to the nearest electronics store to purchase some video games. Some of the great summer releases were Dungeon Siege III, Resident Evil: The Mercenaries 3D, Infamous 2, as well as the re-release of The legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time for the 3DS. I can personally say that Mr. Miyamoto and the people at Nintendo did a great job with the re-mastered version of the classic Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time game. Unlike past releases, this time game developers went back into the game and enhanced the graphics. The game is very much visually appealing and you can

stunt in order to sell the Harry Potter eBooks, which are now going to be available for the first time ever. It’s understandable that the big guys behind the name would want to continue making money off the Harry Potter phenomenon, and with the declining sales of printed books and products, an online method of doing so and the eventual creation of an online store directly targeting would be the most logical method. As for the “online experience”, I was less than pleased with that too. Fans were promised an interactive website, and we let our imaginations run wild. We expected to be able to share our stories and love

for the books and movies with other fans, but the closest we got to that were very monitored comments on our common room walls. When it came down to exploring the stories from a “different angle”, it was all but overwhelming. The site consists of seventeen chapters with two or three “moments” in each. Each of these “moments” consist solely of a picture that you can zoom in and out on and the occasional item that you can pick up and put in your trunk. There are only two moments that have a little more to them than this. One is when you cast the “Alohomora” spell to unlock the door, which takes all of five seconds, and

the other is when you practice brewing a potion, which is absolutely impossible with a laptop track pad. I find it very disappointing. After all the years of loyal dedication from fans, we were thanked with a great let down; especially with a projected release date of one book per year or so. Yes, companies are out there to make money, and after J. K. Rowling has sold her brand to Sony, this will only continue with the Harry Potter franchise. I do, however, feel like they ought to do so with a little more regard to us, the fans that have stood by Harry since the very beginning. After all, we are the reason that there’s any money to be made.

play without the 3D, so those of you who don’t like 3D won’t have to strain your eyes to play. There is however one new aspect of the game that they added: the Sheikah Stones. I personally disagree with this addition that allows you to see what to do next in the game, because I feel as though it takes away from the puzzle solving aspect of and makes it too easy. Though I can understand that this aspect makes the game more appealing to a new audience and not just to the older generation of gamers for nostalgia. The Master quest addition to the game is not quite like the GameCube one. They also went back into this game and changed it up. From what I’ve seen so far, Hyrule is backwards, flipped horizontally and perhaps some other changes from the original, but I don’t yet know what they might be. This isn’t just about the awesome that is Zelda though. There are many exciting games that we are all waiting to come out this fall. Personally I find this time of year for games most anticipated. This past August, popular sport franchise Madden NFL 12 was released followed by the White Knight Chronicles. In September we can expect Dead Island and Resistance 3 on

the 6th, another revamp for the 3DS Star Fox 64 on the 11th and Gears of War 3 on the 20th. Other important games to look out for: Batman: Arkham City, coming out October 18, 2011, for: PC, Xbox 360, and PlayStation 3
. Hopefully like its predecessor it too will be a great enough to win some games of the year awards. In November we have Uncharted 3 on the 1st and Assassin’s Creed: Revelations, which will be released
 November 15, 2011 for the: PC,

Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 to look forward to. This hugely popular game franchise will allow the player to control three different playable characters:Altaïr, Ezio and Desmond. Release dates still to be announced for Star Wars: Old Republic and Zelda: Skyward Sword, which you can pre-order today!

Wednesday, September 7, 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01 - 8..


I’ve got the CEGEP blues... Benjamin H. Shulman Contributor

Well everyone, it’s that time of year again. Put away your bathing suits and hang up your rock’ n roll shoes because it’s time to get back on track and re-enter the qualms of the one and only John Abbott College. A lot of you are probably dreading the fact that it’s time to hit the books all over again. Nobody wants to be sitting in class when it still looks and feels like summer outside. But when it comes down to the nitty gritty, you have to get back into the swing of things. No more standing in line to jump off the diving board at your local pool - now you get to stand in line at the book store. No more going to bed at 7:30am because you partied so hard the night before, now you must get up at that time. It’s somewhat

of a BIG transition for some people. For me, this is my 5th semester back at the college. I’ve been here for two years already and unfortunately, I still can’t find the right program, let alone the right classes for me. This is a time in our lives where we should all be exploring the various possibilities our schooling system has to offer, but for this writer, it’s just not that easy. I’m sure there are many others out there who feel the same way, that CEGEP is like a massive treadmill we’re all trying to run on at the same time but as we all know, there’s no way we can all do it let at the same time. For some, CEGEP is a breeze. Two years to pummel through all of the requirements you need to get into a fine University. For others, the process isn’t nearly as easy. To be quite frank, I’m jealous of the students who seem to have no issue with getting through CEGEP in only four semesters

I’m a geek, not a gosh darn nerd. Will Attar Contributor

I’m a pretty geeky guy. I know my video games and what makes each game different and better than the other. I know the hardware of the consoles and keep tabs on all new developments. I read comics and can tell you in length the pros and cons of the new DC 52 reboot. I can sit down and have a 30-minute conversation about math. I know Han shot first. Does this make me a nerd or a geek? Are they the same? Hell no. The thing about my geekyness, though, is that I don’t make it awkward or extravagant. Like many others, I know all about these things. Geekdom is becoming more popular and socially acceptable in our society today, to a point. Though, like many others, I’m not out there with it. Maybe you could call me a closet geek. I really don’t fit the stereotype. Give me a beer, sit me in a bar, and talk to me about anything.

Sports, politics, current events, chicks, gosh darn doodily anything and I’ll be able to hold it up. With anyone. We could have just met; I’m not the socially awkward kind of geek. Actually, you won’t even have seen my geeky-ness. However, the second someone brings up the question, “Where the hell does Optimus Prime’s trailer go when he transforms,” I’ll be ready to give you a verbal essay on all my theories. Still, at this point, I am not reaching the point of nerdy. So why am I going on about this? What’s the point of being defensive like this? Well, I recently came back from exhibiting at Toronto’s Fan Expo, and I, for the first time, was able to bluntly be able to point out the difference between a nerd and a geek. It was ridiculous. A geek was any schmo like me. Someone who was there, loved all the costumes, sometimes were in costume, and had laughs, met great people, and had fun. The gosh-darn-dangdoodle-pop nerds were the people who came up to our booth (I work for a web-comic company), then tried to

but as we know, everyone is entitled to take the time they need to decipher what career path they want to follow. For me, I’ve switched back and forth from Social Science to Creative Arts like each one was going out of style. In the end I finally chose Creative Arts, but it took me two years to get to this point. So for all you newcomers to John Abbott, don’t worry

about not feeling like you fit in right away. CEGEP is a time of exploration, and don’t forget to have fun along the way! Don’t be afraid to stop in and see and academic advisor if you need any sort of guidance. Try not to feel pressured by your peers as well. We all move at our own pace!

argue with the writer about plot holes, would mutter jokes or insults to themselves, laugh about it, then make everyone feel weird. Basically, I’m saying a nerd is a geek but with the socially awkward rapist vibe. These are the guys who fit the stereotype; the guys who you can smell from 10 feet away and have some sort of terrible skin condition that can be cured by regular hygiene; the guys who are somehow getting saliva everywhere and we’re not sure how; the guys who speak in nothing but sci-fi quotes; the guys who don’t believe in manners or etiquette. I promise you that these descriptions fit more than one person at that convention. Other differences include cosplay habits (nerds go for weird and accurate costumes whereas geeks go for badass, sexy, fun), members of said group (geeks have most of the ladies, and nerds don’t know what to do around them other than stare and hide awkward erections), and obviousness (nerds stick out like a sore thumb, us geeks tend to sneak up on you). What I’m trying to say here is

please don’t let these nerds ruin the wonderful world of geekdom for you. Sci-Fi can be fun, exciting and inspiring. Cosplay can be engaging, sexy, and fun. It’s a wide world of greatness and please, don’t let these goddamn nerds ruin it for you.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01 - 9


Back at square one... Bee Clarke

Opinions Editor

In case any of you haven’t heard, DC Comics is going to reboot a fair amount of its titles during the month of September with what’s being called the new DC 52. A lot of old names are starting over from issue one, names such as Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman, and a lot are coming back, like Swamp Thing and Animal Man. Although I might be a little bias, I think this is a fantastic idea and 100% support it. The idea behind it is to grab new readers, and out of experience working at the 4th Wall comic shop, I know that when a potential new reader sees Batman #800 or Wolverine #1000 they feel very intimidated by it. They feel as if they need to buy all 999 previous issues to be able to follow the story. Starting from square one takes this fear away and gives them somewhere to start and get into the stories. On a more personal note, I’m really very excited about the whole reboot because I’d love to

see how they do it. Having grown up surrounded by comics and their characters and loving it, I already know how they did it last time around. I’m curious to see what changes that they’ll make, how the stories will change and how they will develop character ties. For instance, The Justice League International (Batman, Booster Gold, Green Lantern, August General in Iron, Fire, Ice, Vixen and Rocket Red) catches my attention because it’s a new twist on a concept that we’ve all grown up with. Even though I fully support this reboot, I can understand why collectors aren’t so chuffed about the whole idea. I can imagine that after all these years of hording comics, unopened and unread in glass cases, the thought of having to start over could be a little disorienting, but I do think its time. I think

How to save a (personal) life Louisa Bielig News Editor

Is it common sense these days that you should be able to choose your room mates? Because you really should, unless they are your siblings, in which case you just have to accept their puberty escapades, untidiness or snoring at night. Otherwise, you might want to meet your room mates before moving in to prevent sleepless nights, spontaneous gag reflexes, excessive exposure to loud obnoxious voices or the too-much-information disease. You could convince yourself that all room mates are tidy, responsible and hard working young adults, but who are you really kidding? We often sleep too little, clean way less than we should, eat the least healthy food we can find, and possibly drink and smoke too much. In fact, most of us belong to the uncountable different problem types of room mates, but the most annoying ones are probably the following four: 1. The life of the party, who is never home before 3:00 am. Upon

return, the door snaps indiscreetly, the light must be switched on, the toilet is flushed thoroughly and if friends are included in the spectacle, you won’t sleep for the next hour, at least. The resulting dark circles and pale skin in the morning are not the most attractive signs of this. 2. The devastation dude: “I’ll do it when I come home, I promise,” is his favourite phrase, and unfortunately it’s also a lie. His clothes embellish the public area only partially, the sink is a museum of his last week’s dinners and his floor has never seen a mop. As long as you can still set foot into the hallway, he will at least not prevent you from fleeing from ... 3. The obnoxious guy: communication is not important, it is his life. It’s not necessarily a collection of interesting subjects, but rather an encyclopaedia of every single boring detail of his day, his opinion of random strangers and his most profound

Wednesday, September 7, 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01- 10..

they should see it more as a new thing to start collecting rather than an old thing to stop collecting, but maybe that’s just me being optimistic. The only thing that I really don’t agree with is some of the new costumes. My least favourite by far is the new Superboy in Teen Titans costume. The two big things that I hate about it are the hillbilly barcode super symbol tattoo on his arm and the plastic bag taped to his back. I feel that these just make him overly tacky, and while some tacky is always good in comics but this is just over the top. My second least

favourite has to be Hawk, but then again, he’s not really my kind of guy in the first place. All in all, I’m eagerly waiting for all of the series to start up over the course of this month. Not only will it give me something new to read, a new world to dive into, but I’m hoping that other people will latch on too and I’ll be able to make some new friends through it. Even if it means that I have to watch Batman’s parents die all over again!

thoughts about cheesecake. Since you possibly only peripherally care about this, it could cross your mind to just walk out of the room, but you would probably just bump into ... 4. The too-much-informationman. It is worth a try not to think about his infection in awkward places, what his girlfriend did last night, his dental hygiene or his occasional flatulence, but don’t worry, he’ll tell you all about it. I

personally got into the habit of just imagining very loud music in my head while discreetly leaving the room, but I am still infinitely glad that I have really nice room mates this time and don’t need to bear any of this. So if you just moved into a new apartment and are interested in a positive experience, make rules and make them quickly, before the chaos takes over! All I can say is good luck …


Same old story Henry Park Sports Editor Last season the Oakland Raiders finished their season with an 8-8 record and were 3rd in their division despite the fact that they went undefeated against teams in their division. Although it was a disappointing season, there were still a few good outcomes despite failing to get a winning record. Darren McFadden and Michael Bush showed everyone that they’re arguably the best duo runningbacks in the league. Considering the fact that the Raiders have a pretty weak O-Line, McFadden was still able to finish 5th in the league in total rushing yards. In addition, Jason Campbell showed promising signs in his first year in Oakland. In recent years, all of the Raiders’ quarterbacks have failed to deliver and therefore, there has never really been a consistent starter. Campbell will be returning in his second year along with some of the league’s fastest receivers including Darrius Heyward-Bey, Jacoby Ford, and Denarius Moore. Assuming Campbell develops proper team chemistry with his receivers, he

should be able to utilize the blazing quickness of this year’s receivers. After firing Tom Cable, Al Davis made offensive coordinator Hue Jackson the new head coach for this season. In addition, pro bowl cornerback Nnamdi Asomugha, Zach Miller, and Robert Gallery have all signed with different teams during the offseason, and this will definitely be problematic for both the new offense and defense. Despite the fact that Asomugha is arguably the best cornerback in the entire league, the Raiders still have always had a weak defense. Without him the secondary is now vulnerable to star receivers, who can easily trample over an inexperienced secondary. Although Kevin Boss was signed to replace Zach Miller, Boss is considered to be a “washed up” tight end who is surely past his prime. Miller had led the team in receptions for numerous seasons, which means Jason Campbell will likely have to now rely solely on his core receivers without Miller being able to bail him out on crucial plays. The biggest and most controversial signing of the Raiders done this offseason was that of Terrelle Pryor. The former Ohio State Buckeye was under serious

Super smackdown is super Constantino Montelli Contributor Hello, this is Tino here, bringing you the first wrestling article this year. Hopefully I’ll bring you further articles based on the crazy world of professional wrestling. On Tuesday, the WWE had a Super Smackdown show. Normally Smackdown is aired on Friday. It was live and had all the superstars from Smackdown and RAW on the same night. It felt like a big show, and what better way to kick off Super Smackdown but by having John Cena opening the show! He came out and talked about how he will not only beat Alberto Del Rio, but also hurt him on WWE Night of Champions to win the WWE Championship back. Alberto Del Rio’s personal ring announcer Ricardo Rodriguez came out and got punched in the face for his trouble. Wade Barrett came out and belittled Cena. He reminded him that last year he owned him and made his life miserable. Cena sais that was then and this is now, and that he wanted some payback. In the first match of the night, John Cena defeated Wade

Barrett in a relatively short amount of time. The match was quick and, for what it’s worth, made Cena look ready to face Del Rio at Night of Champions. We went backstage as the #1 contender for the World Heavyweight Championship, Mark Henry, was interviewed and said that he doesn’t care who wins in tonight’s main event; they’ll just be a candidate for his “Hall of Pain”. As I see Mark Henry, in his 17 years in the WWE, he looks more dominant than ever. The second match of the night was the Masked Sensation, Sin Cara, facing the “Money in the Bank” winner, Daniel Bryan. It was a great, fast paced, acrobatic match that was quite entertaining to watch. Sin Cara beat Daniel with a Springboard Moonsault. After the match Sin Cara shook hands with Daniel Bryan, then all of a sudden kicked Daniel in the face. This was totally out of character for the fan favorite Sin Cara. After that we had the contract signing for the CM Punk vs. Triple H match at Night of Champions. It was a very intense and interesting segment. Seriously, go and Youtube it because it just has to be seen. Unfortunately, I can’t explain the back-story of this, because it’s complicated and long. Maybe I’ll explain all of this next issue. The Main Event was Randy

trouble after receiving improper cash benefits, which led to a temporary suspension from the NCAA and the NFL. Many are speculating that Pryor may be starting over Jason Campbell at some point during this season. His playing style has often been compared to Cam Newton along with his incredible mobility, which is evident in his 4.33 40 yard dash. Assuming he gets developed properly, Pryor could definitely be the new starting quarterback, but the Raiders organization is willing to be patient with him in hope that

he doesn’t end up to be a major bust like Jamarcus Russell. Despite all this hype and excitement behind Pryor, at the very earliest he’ll be seeing action during week 6 due to his five-game suspension. Although the Raiders probably won’t go anywhere near the grand stage of the Super Bowl this season, they’re gradually working their way up the ladder to return to the glory days.

Orton, the World Heavyweight Champion, vs. Christian for the title in a Steel Cage match. As this 4 month long rivalry comes to an end, I have to say that not one match from them was bad or mediocre. Every time they wrestled against each other, it was always a 5 star match. I loved all the fake outs that happened. This established that they had fought numerous times and knew what each other’s moves were. The match ended with Randy Orton doing the RKO on Christian off the top rope and getting the 1-2-3. After the match, Mark Henry came out, destroyed an already exhausted

Orton and layed him out. The show ended with Mark holding the title up high over the knocked-out champion. Super Smackdown was a great show. The Main Event and Sin Cara vs. Daniel Bryan were spectacular; the rest of the matches were good. Can’t wait for the CM Punk vs. Triple H match at Night of Champions. As I said, Mark Henry looked more dominant than ever and could potentially defeat the unstoppable Randy Orton. This was Tino with the wrestling results and opinions,

Wednesday, September 7, 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01 - 11.


PRESS RELEASE FOOTBALL TEAM Saturday night, the Isles (1-1) travelled to Trois-Rivières and lost 30-9. The Isles struggled at the beginning of the game and Trois-Rivières took full advantage of the situation by opening a quick 12-0 f irst quarter lead. The second quarter wasn’t better for the Isles as Trois-Rivières added 11 points to the Isles 3 points, for a 23-3 half-time score. In the second half, the Isles played better and limited Trois-Rivières to only 7 points. Unfortunately, the offense had trouble f inding the end-zone and only scored 6 points. Offensively, quarterback Jason Azzoparde completed 13 of 24 passes for 118 yards, and Justin Lavallée was good on all his 3 f ield goal attempts. Defensively, William Dansereau had 9.5 tackles. The loss might be more costly to the Isles since both kicker Lavallée (collar bone) and quarterback Nick Bawn (shoulder) were injured during the game

WOMEN’S HOCKEY The lady islanders participated in a pre-season showcase tournament at Cegep Lionel Groulx on the weekend and came away with two hard fought losses (4-2 to Édouard-Montpetit & 3-1 to St-Jérôme) and a tie (5-5 to Lionel-Groulx). The league tournament helped the coaching staff evaluate the current edition of the Lady Islanders hockey team. The coaching staff prepared a different line up for each game and only played with 10 skaters for the f irst two games, resulting in a lot of ice time for the players to display their skills. In the three short games played, the lady islanders were able to score 8 goals by 8 different players. In their f irst game, the Lady Islanders played one of last year’s best teams in the league in Édouard-Montpetit. With a 3-2 score late in the third period, the coaching staff decided to pull the goalie in an attempt to score the tying goal. Unfortunately, Lynx scored into the empty net and escaped with a 4-2 win. In their second game, the Lady Islanders faced St-Jérôme and gave ever ything they had only to see St-Jérôme win 3-1. On Sunday,

Wednesday, September 7, 2011 | Volume 41, Issue 01 - 12..

the Lady Islanders played LionelGroulx and both teams displayed their offensive skills. At the end of the f irst period, the game was tied at 2-2 and by the time the third period started, LionelGroulx had a 5-3 lead. Despite being down two goals, the Lady Islanders came out ver y strong in the third period and managed to tie the game at 5-5. At the end of the period, the two teams exchanged scoring chances but no one could break the tie.

ATHLETE OF THE WEEK Lady Islander Athlete of the Week is hockey player MariePier Corriveaux who scored 1 goal and added a pair of assists in three tournament games in SteTherese on the weekend. The Male Athlete of the Week is soccer rookie forward Nadeem Meghji who scored both goals for the Islanders on Monday in a 2-2 exhibition draw with Lakeshore.

Volume 41 issue 1  

Bandersnatch John Abbott's Newspaper Volume 41 Issue 1

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